#could feel myself making a messy essay (a messay if you will) on this and i was like NO!!! NO WE'RE NOT DOING THIS

[welcometogrouchland]

About your post here: I’ve noticed recently a lot more posts in general on tumblr just being condescending and mean to kids for not knowing things and it annoys me too, don’t these people remember what it’s like to be a young teen and not know basically anything? Even when you’re trying to learn? How is it their fault??? So frustrating

YEAH I feel you. I didn't mention it in the og post but those posts do seem to be geared towards teens and kids more often than not I think (that's just based on personal observation tho, which is obvs biased).

As for why- tbh that's a topic I have a lot of thoughts on? Mostly baseless speculation since I have no real experience studying this kind of thing and again idk if it's even a real phenomenon or if it just feels like one to me.

Tbh one reason may be that during the pandemic, more ppl began staying inside, on screens, which meant more teens started exhibiting Chronically Online Behaviour™ (bc they literally were chronically online), which means more ppl started losing patience and being snide when trying to steer them away from such behavior (bc everyone's patience is worn thin by a pandemic!)

And like. I know we say it most often as a joke on here BUT genuinely the user base of Tumblr aging bc the ppl originally on it as teens haven't left (for good reason lol) is probably a contributing factor.

It's mostly a good thing but like you said- they genuinely might not remember much about their teen years! Or at least they don't sympathize much w/ their teenage self and that's reflected in their interaction w/ young ppl.

Ppl sometimes don't want to have to put in the extra work that comes w/ talking to someone who has considerably less life experience than you. It's understandable but sometimes ppl just get miffed abt it all.

Also like. This is a broad and complex topic so I'm going to limit myself talking abt it too much but- since early online culture and in especially in recent years, people on the internet seem genuinely think that being annoying or ignorant is truly a justification for being bullied and/or harassed.

Like it takes different forms across different groups and platforms but it's very much a part of the tone of a lot of online conversations. And I am NOT saying that well meaning but snide advice posts are the same as bullying- far from it! They're two very different things and the latter is at least well intentioned most of the time.

But I think needlessly aggressive conversations are a much bigger feature of online spaces than irl spaces and thus they slip into posts that don't even mean it/aren't even particularly invested in the topic at hand, all bc ppl perceive the target audience as ignorant or annoying.

Which isn't to say that it's not a two way street- most ppl online are like this! Oftentimes I'm like this, even when I don't mean to be! sometimes teens are ignorant or annoying and sometimes they're downright mean but. being a dick abt advice isn't going to change that. and I'd argue that normalizing being needlessly mean about innocuous topics is just gonna make them worse in the long run? So. Something something 4D chess.

And like, That's really what makes posts like that so frustrating- they want to be informative or educational but they go about it in such a counterproductive and off putting way! The accusatory tone and condescension just makes the reader defensive and unwilling to learn bc they feel attacked...when the posts entire point to be educational.

my og post wasn't phrased particularly nice either, bc I was angry and upset- and that's probably not gonna convince ppl to thoughtfully reevaluate their behavior! If I went into a post with the intention to do that I'd probably word everything differently.

Sometimes a firm hand is needed or expected when it comes to serious topics and I am NOT advocating for ppl to tone police themselves when it comes to things near and dear to them (truly hope that comes across in this post)

but if someone is complaining about how ppl use their personal blogs, navigate websites that don't work like any other current social media, or any other trivial task that doesn't come natural unless you have experience w/ it...it just feels like a waist of energy on everyone's part.

This has all been a very long winded way of saying- I totally get you and agree. it's just not productive to write out a vent-y rant on the same post as your informational guide and the frustration and embarrassment that comes from being condescended to online isn't productive either. Be mad, for sure, just don't try and teach ppl a skill or lesson while you're mad. There's a reason parents shouting at their kids during homework about how simple the problem is doesn't teach them anything.