#crackship taken seriously

[ye-olde-sodor]

Night Talks (CotL Fic PT 3)

Gordon gazed of into the distance from the castle balcony. His eyes glanced down at the sight of the city of Vicarstown below him. Vicarstown, the largest city on the Island, connecting the Mainland to Sodor itself, looked so small from the palace in the sky.

When 10 had took control of the island, the Diesel works had ascended into the sky, shifting and morphing from the ranshack sheds that the Diesels dared to call home into a grand and wonderous palace that could rival that of Windsor itself.

Gordon turned his back from the view and leaned against the railing of the balcony. He felt the cold autumn wind brush against his face and arms as he turned his attention to the archway. The light of the moon seemed to shimmer around him and the balcony railing. As Gordon look at the grand arch, a small, thin man in a red turtleneck and black overalls had appeared.

Diesel, the appointed magic scholar, had returned from his trip from the bar. Gordon scoffed at him as he approached.

"You're fifteen minutes late, Rudolph. Any later and you would've had to deal with the Patrols."

"Yeah yeah," the diesel mocked. "It's not my fault we had to take the roads."

Gordon became cross at the mention of roads. "You took the roads?! You're a diesel, why didn't you just travel by rail?!"

"Hey, blame Dodge, not me!" the thin man proclaimed. "His engine failed last week, remember?"

Gordon blinked. He had heard of Dodge's engine, but had assumed all had been fixed. He also assumed that Dodge would've just climbed into one of his colleagues cabs and driven home. Then again, after living with them for so long, he knew the diesels tend to make things more complicated than they would've been had they just used their heads. At least they were typically creative in their poor decisions.

He rolled his eyes at the man but decided to drop the subject. "Just...try to get back here on time next time. I'd hate for you to get mixed up with the patrols."

Diesel, surprisingly enough, felt guilty. Gordon was one of the few engines on the railway that had a fondness for Diesel, although he's not exactly sure why.

In a surprising turn of events, Gordon had stayed with the Diesels after his fight with Diesel 10 and had been working for them ever since. He'd gotten along with the other diesels better than anyone would've expected...and he became especially close to 10.

Diesel wasn't the only one who noticed this change in the prideful engine's notion towards diesels. Many suspected that it had to do with what had happened in the fight between the two of them. While he himself wasn't present for it, he knew that the mysterious Gold Dust was involved with it...and he was determined to understand how it worked.

He walked closer to Gordon and pulled a sheet of paper out of his overall pocket and handed it to Gordon.

"If it makes up for it, I've been meaning to give you to this," he explained.

"What is it?" Gordon questioned.

"It's just an experiment proposal for the dust. I'll need a small bag of the dust for it, but it's a reasonable amount."

"So you want me to propose the idea to him." Gordon concluded as he skimmed through the paper. Diesel was right, It was a simple request. Just a small amount of Gold Dust for Diesel to sprinkle onto a live plant to see what would happen. Simple, but if it produces a result, can prove to be very useful.

"You're the only one he talks to anymore," he argued. "Even Splatter and Dodge can't get to him."

"That makes sense," Gordon argued, "He's...changed since the last time you've seen him."

"Really?" Diesel snarked sarcastically.

"More so than usual, you brick." Gordon sneered. "If you knew how much he's changed you'd understand."

"Of course I know how much he's changed," Diesel thought, "I've known him for years and no one knew he would do this. Besides, what do you know about him? How did you suddenly become his number one fan?"

Gordon put the paper in his pocket and turned to Diesel. "Well, I'll see what I can do. I can't guarantee that he'll go through with the idea, but I'm sure he'll have a look at it. I know he's fond of your little tricks and tests."

"Y'know, you sure know a lot about him." Diesel teased. "I've known him for, what, Three years now? I didn't even know he liked my tricks!"

"What are you implying?" Gordon growled.

"Oh nothing! Nothing at all!" Diesel said as he threw his arms up in defense. "It's just that, well...You two seem awfully close for-"

"We're friends." Gordon interrupted, his face turning red. "Nothing more, nothing less. You're just telling whoppers again."

"For Makers sake Gordon, you two have matching tattoos!"

"Friends can have matching tattoos!" Gordon protested as steam rose from his mouth.

"And send each other love poems?"

"Friends can absolutely send-HEY."

Diesel smiled at the reaction. Little did Gordon know that he had stumbled on a poem on Gordon's desk earlier that day. He had no ill intent with the information, he merely wanted to hear it from the blue engine himself. Both for confirmation and for the fun of it.

"It's fine, really." Diesel insisted, "I just wanna know the story. How did you two, of all engines, hook up?"

Gordon, knowing he'd been caught, let out a long sigh. "It happened around...three years ago. When he first showed up here."

"That long?!"

"It didn't happen right away, you fool!" Gordon clarified. "He was the one who started to feel something for me when I was teaching him the express route. I didn't start having those feelings until after he sent me one of his poems."

"How Chessy." Diesel snarked sarcastically.

"Oh it gets better," Gordon remarked. "It was a rough draft. According to him it was awful, but his driver mixed up the rough draft with the finished poem."

Diesel cocked his head, "Sooooo what happened when you read it?"

"I was swooned." he admitted with a deadpan look, "Completely taken out of my element."

Diesel burst into laughter as Gordon went on, ignoring the man altogether as he was lost in recollection.

"He had his driver pin the note to the side of the shed wall where I was sleeping for the night. When my driver found it in the morning, he read it out loud to us."

Diesel tried to compose himself as Gordon when on.

"I didn't even know we could feel intimacy towards each other until then, and even after the poem I was still skeptical about the feeling. A few weeks later the two of us met to talk about it, and we decided to just keep things the same."

"What?"

"Neither of us knew what romance was. 10 believed that we could feel it, I didn't. We didn't even know if what we were feeling is love to begin with. It could be something else entirely for all we know."

The emotions of machines were never fully understood by anyone, not even the machines themselves. Many believed that they could feel certain emotions, others didn't. Gordon was one of these machines. Him and the majority of the engines on the island believed that love was foreign to engines, even after the evidence from Toby and Henrietta. Until 10 came along, he was convinced that romantic attraction was impossible for engines to feel, and even went as far as to shame those who did back in his youth. Now that he was older (and wiser), he's been expressing doubts about the beliefs that were drilled into him at Doncaster.

Diesel, now incredibly intrigued and eager to help, wanted to quiz the engine. "Can you describe it. The feeling I mean, can you tell me what it feels like?"

"It's...difficult to explain it, but I could try to."

Diesel nodded and decided that questions could help him out. "When my driver fell in love, he said that he could feel happy when he thought of her. What does it feel like when you think of him?"

Gordon took a moment to think about it and responded back. "I feel...warm. Like my fire was recently lit during the winter. It's cozy, and it feels good."

"What about when you two are close together or when you spend time with him? Do you get the same feeling?"

"Yes, I do." Gordon explained. "It's the same feeling, but it's stronger. Warmer even...What do you make of it?"

"Driver says love is like a fever," explained Diesel, "But it's a good fever. It means you found the person who you want to stay with for the rest of your life. The two of you are supposed to be happy together, your supposed to make each other happy, y'know?"

"When you put it like that, it makes sense. But it feels so much more complicated than that, words just can't do it justice."

"It sounds a lot like love to me," Diesel spoke. "but I can't speak for the two of you. You gotta figure that out yourselves."

"True, but some advice from an expert would be appreciated...I don't think either of us know what we're doing."

Diesel shrugged his shoulders. "I may not know much about love but...well I wish for the best for you two. If anyone it can make it work, it's 10. He's tough, but he's a softie. He'd never hurt someone that he loves."

Gordon smiled at the man. He was about to thank his friend before he was seized by a sudden coughing fit. He began to cough violently as thick black smoke had begun to bellow out of his mouth, the smell of diesel fuel filling the air around him.

He knelt down to the ground as he gripped his chest. Diesel reacted quickly and placed his hands on his shoulders as he tried to soothe him. The smoke stung his eyes, but he held on to his friend, waiting for the eventual end to the coughing fit.

The two of them had grown accustomed to the fits, as they had started after his fight with 10 on the platform at Knapford. They typically started around midnight and in the early morning hours, and only lasted for a few moments.

Diesel would never suggest it to Gordon's face, but he suspects that the Gold Dust that 10 used in the fight had been the cause of the fits...and Gordon's transformations.

Eventually, as the black clouds faded, Gordon released the grip on his chest and looked at the palm of his hand. His already long nails had formed into a set of claws, with small quills jutting out from his arm. He cursed as he rubbed his wrist and, with the help of Diesel, got up from the ground.

“It would appear…that my stay here is overdue. Very overdue." he spoke weakly. “Derick and Spamcan must be waiting for me at the gates…I should be off."

"Wait, are you alright? Do you need someone to cover for you?"

"I'm fine," he spoke softly. "If anything, it's quite ironic. I lecture you for being late and yet here I am stalling. We can chat in the morning when we get back, if you'd like."

Diesel smiled as he helped Gordon to his feet, careful not to poke himself with the quills. "Deal, but take it easy. I don't want to be the guy to tell 10 that his boyfriend got hurt on the job."

"Oh hush you." he teased. "There'll be Hell to pay for everyone if that were to happen to me."

Gordon waved farewell to Diesel and walked into the fortress. As he entered the castle, a feeling of excitement and unease rushed into his body in anticipation of the patrol. Like all of the other changes to his body, he had become used to the sudden changes in appearance and behavior by now...but it didn't make what would happen next any more normal.

He hated it, but there was nothing that anyone could do to stop it. Not until they understood his situation, and in order to understand it, he had to let it happen. Not that he had much of a choice.

A small pain in his chest had formed again, and his heart began to race...and he sprinted towards the gates, praying that no one would see what would about to happen to him next.

[goldleaf-blog]

So I started a new ship.....

[asmodeus-682]

Why bother with names?

Creator x Trashcan man

Based off the poll I previously did. Fic under the cut

Creator didn't know what he was expecting when getting into this relationship, especially with someone as elusive and equally evil as himself. Trashcan however knew full well what he was getting into when dating the giant floating mass of brain. "Trashy, why do you insist on not using your real name? It's rather..childish to csll yourself Trashcan man" Creator said calmly, watching as his partner got changed into his usual attire. "Why do you insist on being called Creator over a better nickname. Or at least let me call you something else?" Trashcan retorted as he put on his navy blue trench coat, causing his eldritch lover to rub his frontal lobe with a tendril out of feigned frustration. Creator did enjoy Trashcan's snarky attitude, however sometimes it also made him want to choke the man. Unfortunately for the floating brain, he had learned from previous times that Trashcan was not opposed to such things.

The day went by as any other would for an evil pair such as themselves. Such as; stalking watching over Creator's children Sun, Moon and Earth. Plotting ways to exploit star power so that they can rule the world together and making plans to make newer, more advanced robots to further their plans. By the time the day was over both evil geniuses were exhausted and in need of a decent rest. Trashcan getting into bed while Creator rested in a pod of sorts. "Goodnight Creator" the elledged human said, tired voice rumbling out of the metal bin stuck to his head. Creator sighed as he watched his partner fall asleep. "Rest well, my insufferable bastard" he muttered before succumbing to sleep himself.

[the-bearer-of-bad-ideas]

my math teacher started talking about her marriage in class and everyone got distracted and this somehow lead to me and my friend showing her and like 3 other people the keimmith wedding and explaining the plot out so yeah thats a thing my math teacher knows about the keimmith now

[sparkly-caroline]

Pink x The Icecream cone is the best ship in the series, no hesitation

Yellow x Lime? Nah bro. France Flag Poly? Close, but nuh-uh. Tan x Fortegreen? Get that shit outta here!

I only know Pink x the Icecream cone

(Yeah this post is complete crack, cuz in this blog we very rarely take anything seriously)

[spookymultimedia]

She's cold, she's dark, she's cynical She's forever angry at the world She's no angel, but she is my religion Always finding ways to numb the pain She's mad and she will never change She's no angel, but she is my religion, religion

[thelastdiamondpiratealchemist]

I'm seeing a lot of TADC ships around here.

But here is the best one.

Pomni X Sandwich. A love never meant to be.

[trokopotaka]

Screaming crying throwing up who am I.

[sleepymuch]

Okay

For a while I've wanted to make ship children for starbug and starstamp (Eddie x Sally) (ship name from @doyoubelieveinwhateverr )

But when I tried to draw the two kids for starbug my brain was like "No, that doesn't look right" and the same with starstamp's kid

I hate my smooth pea brain💀

[pxl8ed]

Haha soooo the 11 chapter crack ship fic for ROTTMNT I’m writing is gonna be hella long 😅

First chapter is already over 4k words and I’m not even half way done 😂

This pairing is very much the “I can make him worse” trope and OH BOY DO THEY!

I’m so excited for this one 🤩

[ye-olde-sodor]

Crack Ship appreciation post (The Gorb x Danger Loaf #10) because I need more stuff on this blog and I want to talk about them

You know that moment when you start shipping two characters as a joke and it either dies down or snowballs out of control? A month or two ago, I was looking more into 10's class (the BR class 42 aka the Warship class) and I noticed a few similarities between him and Gordon.

-Both engines started out as goods engines before they were transferred to express services due to exceeding the expectations of their makers and BR. On top of this, both are considered to be very fast engines. (Gordon with around 100 mph (160 km/h) and 10 with 90 mph (145 km/h) in a surprising twist).

-Both suffered a massive loss of their siblings. (10 has two preserved siblings while Gordon has Scott and his cousins). I head cannoned that the preservation of steam is why 10 was so aggressive to steam engines in the first place, and when you look at the numbers you can see why.

-Finally, as a funny side note, both have Moon Moons in the family. Zebra for 10 and countless others for Gordon. (Gay Crusader, Dick Turpin, Papyrus, Sandwich, and many more). I personally find it funny that 10's siblings have all the majestic and powerful names while poor Gordon has a sibling named Salmon Trout of all things.

So what do all of these comparisons mean? It means we have a potential for these two to have a lot to talk about and eventually bond over. But how exactly does the regal and formal Gordon fall for this idiot anyway? Simple...it's his carefree attitude.

Gordon is incredibly fond of his image, even with his various blunders he still sees himself as an important and regal engine. We know he's secretly a goof, but he almost never lets it show. Many people head canon that he needs to keep up this charade because he was quite literally built into the image of being this high and mighty being. If he can't keep that pristine image up, then he's worthless in the eyes of the Gresley's and to BR.

Now let's compare 10. He's the crazy Florda guy who's doing all sorts of things just because he can. He doesn't care about his image, nor what people think of him. He's always been the outcast, even more so after his class was withdrawn, so he adapted to work on his own and to do his own thing. He doesn't have the same problems as Gordon. He doesn't have a name or a legacy to keep because there's nothing left to keep.

Put the two of them together, give it some time, and you got yourself quite the duo. They'd make for an interesting friendship, but how would they fair as a couple?

-As I mentioned in my SS Gordon post, I'd imagine 10 being more open to relationships then Gordon. It's safe to say that the Mainland doesn't take too kindly to engine romance, but it's even more likely that it would still exist. 10 would absolutely believe in love to some degree, and would later convince Gordon that it exists too.

-Going back to that post, I mention that Gordon was drawn to 10's free and goofy personality, and eventually allowed for him to express his own funny, laid-back personality. The two of them would act both as foils and as complements for their characters. Gordon is the more controlled of the two and keeps 10 in check while 10 helps Gordon ease up and to have some fun.

Head canon wise, I could go on about these two for hours lmao

-It was absolutely 10 that fell for Gordon first. Gresley's always had a reputation for looking like marble statues, but he never believed that it was true until Gordon showed him the ins and outs of pulling the express. He was even more interested in him when he learned that the old kettle was actually able to keep up with him!

-The both of them are secret literature nerds, with 10 specializing in poetry and Gordon specializing in gothic/Victorian literature.

-If they were human, 10 would be much larger than Gordon, and Gordon would absolutely take advantage of that with constant cuddles and lap sitting. The only downside is that he needs to stand on something or be held up by 10 just to kiss him.

-Staying on theme with human head canons, 10's many hobbies would involve engineering and inventing. This, in turn leads him to making all sorts of wacky stuff, such as a car that has two steering wheels and a button that presses itself. Gordon is usually the one who has to bail him out whenever these inventions blows up in his face (figuratively and literally).

-They're dorks. Big, silly, loveable dorks who would gladly beat the other in a friendly competition or race and listen to the other brag about it for hours.

-Gordon is one of the few engines who knows 10's real name, and he's never told anyone what it is, much to the dismay of any nosy engines or humans.

-While 10 is open about his previous life as a bounty hunter, he's ashamed of it and wants nothing more than to make amends for it. Gordon insists that he already has, but even Gordon's words aren't enough to help him. It'll take years of support (and maybe some ghostly visitors) for him to finally let go and move on.

-The two of them would often switch jobs on occasion. If 10 was too tired to take the Midnight express then Gordon would take it, and vice versa. You can imagine Topham's shock when Gordon offered to take one of 10's goods trains for him after his engine failed. It was at that moment that he knew something was up between those two, but it would take years for it to click.

-While 10 is the more affectionate of the two, they usually keep it behind closed doors (again, to keep nosy engines or humans away). Having said that, he'd be the more likely of the two to display some PDA when no one was looking.

-The Mainland was known for separating and even scraping engines who showed some sort of romantic interest in each other. This, in turn, made all engine couples fiercely protective of each other, to the point of being aggressive towards those who suggest separation. While the two are protected under Sodor's various Antitheft and Antiscrap laws, Gordon and 10 are still weary about Mainlanders. The pair are considered to be some of the most aggressive engines on the island. Gordon more so than 10 in a surprising twist.

-Nicknames for Gordon include: Big Blue, Babe, Baby Blue, Speedy, Blue Streak, Shooting Star, Jekyll

-Nicknames for 10 include: Claw for brains, 10, Bread loaf, Hazard Stripes, Love, My Love, Dear, Hyde

-There was a case where Gordon referred to 10 as Jekyll in front of Percy on accident, and now everyone is convinced that it was 10's name. He felt horrible about it until 10 thought it was so funny that he just rolled with the mix-up. Besides, he preferred the name Jekyll over Cockade.

TL; DR These two are the textbook definition of Opposites Attract and I am absolutely making fanfics of them in the future (both on here and on my AO3 account).

[goldleaf-blog]

Wu brings home his big scary boyfriend and Garmadon not having it.

[sinisterexaggerator]

Cad Bane x Ahsoka Tano. Smut / Humor / “Crack taken seriously” (eventually). Cad Bane is infatuated by one of the very last "Jedi."

Summary: Ahsoka Tano and Cad Bane meet in an unexpected place years after the Clone Wars have ended, now Ahsoka is addicted to his scent, that Duros dick, and Cad Bane is infatuated with her. She is after all, one of the last "Jedi" to traverse the Galaxy, and a bold adversary - one he wants to sink his fangs into, but could he be falling for her, and just who is this ... "Fulcrum?"

To reiterate, Ahsoka is a grown ass adult woman of 32 years old around this time. It takes place during Star Wars: Rebels and she is in a position of power. Cad Bane is smitten by her.

THIS IS A CRACK FIC. IT’S DUMB AS HELL.

*This has now become a multi-chapter fic by accident, and also, the crack may turn serious - also, by accident. Whoops.

Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | ?

---

Ao3

[asmodeus-682]

Crackship art go brr

Since you saw the sneak peak imma tag you @artoutoftheblue

Lunara x Taurus

[mysterycitrus]

Hey there, Happy New Year! Sorry if this ask seems confusing.

I've really come to enjoy your blog as someone who is kind of new to navigating the world of comics and how to read them and you seem to be one of the people that's more vocal about all the fanon and canon differences and how that damages people's perception of characters. I'm just a bit confused in what you consider to be the difference of headcanons and fanon, I know fanon is a more of something that a big number of people believe, but if someone headcanons something that isn't covered in canon, would that be "bad" or fall on the fandom category?

Hope this doesn't sound mean or anything, I'm just a bit confused

hello!! welcome to batburger!!!!

wrt fanon vs canon my issue is this — parts of comic fandom are very vocal about not engaging with the source material. deciding what fanon is “good” vs “bad” isn’t the point because im not interested in policing peoples fandom experience. however there is a point where i don’t understand what exactly some people are fans of, because what they talk about is so disconnected from the original text.

imagine meeting a hunger games fan, and when u ask about their favourite movie or book, they instead tell u that they’ve never read or seen any part of the series, exclusively read fanfiction, and then inform u that they believe president snow is peeta’s grandfather and that actually haymitch was the authoritarian mastermind behind the hunger games. that doesn’t make any sense, and has no basis in canon. it’s a very extreme hypothetical, but i wouldn’t really take what they say about the hunger games seriously. it also reminds me a bit of the hp marauders fanworks that exist almost autonomously to the books (while still containing the same issues as said books).

most fanon enjoyers (and this is particularly pervasive with batfam fans) enjoy characters and relationships that simply do not exist. that alone isn’t a problem (crackships and headcanons have existed since ye olde star trek zine days) but the issue is that these fanon interpretations are loudly asserted as being the correct way to engage with the characters. i do not believe it should be controversial to prefer characters in their canonical text, or to ask why some fanon content is taken as gospel, especially when so much of it is racialised.

this lends into a wider trend where these headcanons are respected more than canon despite often being actively reductive, accidentally demeaning, or just plain bad faith interpretations. it’s much harder to combat the racism present in conversations about damian wayne when the people in question aren’t grant morrison or judd winick or scott snyder, but instead a nebulous group of people on twitter.

flatly, i encourage people to read the source material. there are a lot of comics, but googling ‘[literally any character] reading list’ has literally never been easier. start by consuming the movies or cartoons or films or shows or the one volume graphic novels, then pinpoint what u like and start from there. people are discouraged from reading comics — and they shouldn’t be!! especially for popular characters there are very accessible starting points!! u will find characters to love with rich history and lore!!!! support queer artists and artists of colour who are actively changing the industry!!! i guarantee that the fanon version of that male character u love is actually originally from a female character with a great miniseries written by greg rucka!!!!

[reineydraws]

Is the renkaza a crackship?

nope! on ao3, they're the third biggest kny ship and the biggest kyojuro ship, actually--not that popularity automatically means a ship can't be crack? hm.

the definition of crackship is debateable lol but to me they're not cracky 'cuz the things akaza was saying during their mugen train fight and akaza's human backstory provide a lot of give in terms of connection points to kyojuro.

they're a ship for all the people who love enemies/rivals-to-lovers plots, and ships that involve a lot of physical fighting and/or searching for humanity, which are some of my fave things to look for haha. they can also just be deeply convoluted and toxic when romantically involved, which is its own brand of fun! (tho i personally tend to look for stuff that ends more wholesomely. angst with a happy ending my beloved. 💞)

i will say that while they're not a crackship, the au's where akaza just fucks off completely (like my au comic haha) or where kyo goes all-in on being a demon right away can come off cracky, but i think that's less "crackship" and more "crack taken seriously".

i hope this makes sense!