#dad! oystein aarseth

[child0feden]

DAD AU TIMELINE

- well… here is the rough timeline and some kind of terrible moodboards! again, the kids names are used here but i will never use them in my works just in case you guys do not like them! of course this is not all of the dads but if you guys like this i could make a part two! had to use a white border on the øystein one because i hit the picture limit… arghhh! also i ended up giving bård another baby hehe <3

CALLIOPE AND CASPER OHLIN

- calliope ohlin was your first child and she was born when you guys were 21!

✩ pelle was still in mayhem but after your sudden and unexpected pregnancy, he got much better at controlling his self harm and knew he wanted to be here to meet your child, wanted to be here to meet his child, he knew he needed to be here to support you and knew that maybe, this was a new leaf to turn even if he was so deeply afraid! he stayed in mayhem but did move out of shared band house after the news of your pregnancy and the two of you moved into a small, cozy little one bedroom apartment, it served well enough housing, at least until the baby got older and needed her own room…

- casper ohlin was your second child and he was born when you guys were 25!

✩ pelle and you planned to have your second child, as previously mentioned in moon in the mist! he knew he wanted to his little girl to have siblings just as he had, knew he wanted her to have a lifelong friend, someone who she could protect and someone who would look up to her! but pelle also knew that he was not about to purposely bring another child into this world when the two of you were still living in the one bedroom apartment so you waited until the two of you had a little house with two sizeable bedrooms, purchased outright with saved up funds from mayhem record sales and the help of his parents who were more than happy to help out, especially if it meant getting more grandchildren…

dad! pelle who makes traditional swedish cinnamon rolls for you and his children!

he makes them whenever he feels like it, not just for special occasions or anything like that! he never found himself to be a great cook, the only recipe he could ever remember was cinnamon rolls, it was the only thing he could really supply you with when you were pregnant and craving something so warm, sweet and sickly in the middle of the dark, cold nights! now, he bakes them for the babies too! well, when they’re old enough anyways… he gets more confident in his baking skills when he sees your children stuffing their faces with the sweet treats, watching with a small smile as your daughter holds her sticky hand up to offer him half of the baked good, sulking and putting on her best puppy eyes when he tries to refuse a bite since he still struggles just a little with eating… but who is he to deny your daughter? you and your children truly are the only people who have ever made him comfortable in things, made him comfortable and genuinely happy in his life…

SELENE AND SYLVI EITHUN

- selene eithun was your first child and she was born when you guys were 18!

✩ bård definitely did not plan on having children this young and neither did you! it was an entirely unexpected pregnancy that likely came from unprotected drunk sex after a concert, a birth control mishap or even a condom split! though just because it was an unexpected pregnancy does not mean it was unwanted, especially when it came to bård! well, of course he was slightly terrified and panicked when you first showed him the positive pregnancy test, of course he was worried about how young the two of you were and how his only real income was any emperor sales and the government pay he got but he was extremely quick to come around to the idea of having a baby, of having his own child with you! his fears were almost entirely swallowed up by excitement as he wondered who your baby would look more like, what they would sound like, what their first word would be and all of that…

- sylvi eithun was your second child and she was born when you guys were 32!

✩ bård knew he wanted one more child with you, at the very least! if we go down the route of him ending up imprisoned just months after selene was born, he just hated how much he missed out on with his first little girl… hated how he missed her first steps and her first word, hated how every time you brought her to visit him she seemed to have grown so much within just weeks… he knew having another baby would not just evaporate all of his regret, his want to have a second child was not just a selfish need to experience all of these things he missed out on by his own fault but he just knew it would be nice to be able to experience it, he remembered how much he loved caring for you during your first pregnancy, thought back on how much your small shared apartment felt like a family home in the days after you brought selene home from the hospital! bård knew he was not just going to forget selene and shove her aside for his second baby after he got out of prison and you fell pregnant again, she would always be his first baby, the first person aside from you who ever made him feel so full of love! the excitement he once again felt rising in himself when you presented a positive pregnancy test to him in your shared bedroom of your new house just days after he was released from prison was oh so familiar, so consistent with the excitement he felt when you were pregnant with selene all those years ago…

dad! bård who buys his six year old daughter, sylvi, so many toffee apples for halloween and freaks out a little when her first baby tooth falls out due to getting stuck in the sticky toffee!

of course, he knows that baby teeth are supposed to come out, he knows they are bound to come out! he remembers all those times when he was in prison and selene would visit with you, proudly showing off the tiny gaps and telling him all about how much money she had managed to score from the tooth fairy, he remembered how you would throw a smirk and a playful eye roll his way when she mentioned the tooth fairy! but he had never experienced it before as a parent, he had never seen it happen first hand… he was so spooked when he heard slyvi let out a whimper and go completely quiet from her once loud rambles around a mouthful of apple, quickly darting his eyes to where she sits on the couch and feeling panic rise in his chest when he sees her holding a small hand to her mouth, sees some slight red on her skin, his mind just shoots to the worst possible scenario as he rushes over to her and crouches down to be eye to eye… it’s only when he looks down at the sweet apple still grasped in her free hand that he sees the tiny white tooth lodged in the golden toffee, only when he sees that is when he begins to calm his mind and realise that it is certainly not as serious as it seems, letting out a relieved sigh as he asks her to move her hand so that he can see her mouth, speaking in such a soft and warm tone as to keep her calm, already seeing some salty water building in her wide eyes, threatening to spill over! only when she hears her fathers soft voice asking to see her mouth is when she’ll move her hand down, allowing him to coo quietly and assure her that everything is okay as he checks over her mouth, seeing the gap now in place between her baby teeth before he stands up from his crouches position and sits beside her on the couch, pulling her onto his lap and pressing a kiss to her head as he explains to her what happened, telling her all about how she’s growing up now… how another tooth will begin to come in and fill the empty space! his small smile slowly grows as he watches the tears in her eyes disappear, as he watches her own small smile spread across her face at the thought of being a big girl now! when you and selene arrive home from shopping and spot them on the couch, bård is quick to explain what happened to you whilst letting you take sylvi from his arms, checking her over quickly for yourself whilst he talks to selene about what she got from shopping…

TOPAZ, TARA AND SEREN SKJELLUM

- topaz skjellum was your first child and she was born when you guys were 20!

✩ ted really just always wanted children with you and all of your children were very much planned, yes even at the young age of twenty! he just loved the idea of a domestic life with you, the idea of having children with you and loving them, raising them… ted knew you were the one and that he wanted children with you within just over a year of dating! he knew you would make a beyond perfect mother, knew that you were the mother he wanted for his children! he was very much open about his desire for children with you and would casually bring it up to you before bed or over dinner and when you agreed? telling him that you would love nothing more than to have a baby with him… especially since you guys were already living in a house, a sizeable little home buried deep in the thick norwegian woods! not to mention that money was not a huge problem at all? he was ecstatic and wanted to get right to baby making, despite being quite young, he was just so… beyond excited at the thought of having a baby with you, of watching your baby grow up and explore the world around her…

- tara skjellum was your second child and she was born when you guys were 21!

✩ ted just absolutely adored life with you and topaz, adored how maternal you were, how beautiful you looked cradling your baby, his baby and just one short month after giving birth to topaz, you were pregnant once again with tara and the two of you could not have been happier that she would be growing up right alongside her sister, so close in age…

- seren skjellum was your third child and she was born when you guys were 32!

✩ ted was beyond happy with just topaz and tara for a long time, he was content with the two of them and you but when he got older, as he watched his first two babies grow up and slowly spread their wings… he knew he wanted just one last baby, knew he wanted to experience all of those baby things once more and knew that now was almost the perfect time since the two of you had moved into a slightly bigger house and darkthrone sales were doing amazing… when he approached you with the idea of having one last baby, you could only ever agree, you knew how much he loved being a father, how much he loved raising his babies and teaching them about the world! since your first two girls were so close in age, topaz never really got a chance to be an older older sister but now, both her and tara would get the experience of being older sisters, of getting to have a baby sister to play with and dress up, to protect and love…

dad! ted who had a christmas baby with you!

it was seren, your last born baby together… she was born in the early, early hours of christmas morning with snow slowly fluttering down from the sky and gently tapping against the thick glass of the hospital windows, she was the best christmas gift both you and ted could ever, ever ask for… the most beautiful christmas gift you would ever, ever receive and the most treasured christmas gift you would ever, ever have in your lives! christmas days after she was born become so much more special to the two of you, with her birthday being on the same exact day, ted takes the chance to spoil her rotten with double the gifts! of course he knows that spoiling your children is not good for them which is why he does not do it all the time, only when they really deserve it or for special occasions like birthdays and christmas, only then does he spoil them with everything they could ever ask for… ted just absolutely loves cuddling up on the couch with you on christmas morning, your children sitting comfortably on the rug in front of the fireplace as it steadily crackles and pops, the flames warming you as your children constantly look up at you and ted, excitedly showing off what they got…

ALVA AND AUDRA AARSETH

- alva and audra aarseth are identical twin girls and they were born when you guys were 23!

✩ euronymous honestly kind of really wanted kids with you! i mean, i don’t believe your twin girls were totally planned but i feel like he secretly really wondered what a domestic life with you would be like whilst still being in mayhem, still being involved in the black metal scene… he had common, reoccurring dreams about teaching his child to play the guitar, teaching them all about his favourite bands and his favourite movies! but he would never admit this to you and would keep his act of just kind of disliking children up all the way until you fell pregnant! only after you tell him that you’re pregnant is when he will soften a whole lot at the mention of children, at the mention of how far along you are and when it turned out to be twins? he was certainly terrified, beyond terrified but again, he kept up an act of confidence and actually often bragged about it, bragged about how he basically knocked you up twice in one! his smug attitude is so strong around your shred friends but when the two of you are just relaxing in your shared apartment, cuddled up on the couch watching a movie, he is a lot less smug and much more soft with his hand gently stroking your rounded stomach and talking to his babies, trying overly hard to get them to kick at the sound of his voice! the two of you were already living together in a pretty sizeable apartment in oslo but he did end up selling helvete around a month into your pregnancy, realising how much the rent was truly costing him and how little he was getting in return! he knew he had a more important priority now, he knew he wanted that money to go towards his babies…

dad! euronymous who stops dying his hair after his babies are born!

because his girls came out looking like his twins, they were born with his natural blonde hair! at first, he just kind of did not have time to re-dye his hair black between caring for you after you had just given birth and between looking after your newborn babies! he was just too tired and too strung out with all of his newfound duties as a father, too busy getting used to this new chapter of his life, he just did not have the time to even think about buying and using more black hair dye when his blonde starting coming through… when he eventually does have the spare time to think about it, to see how his hair has almost completely reverted back to the natural blonde colour, you manage to talk him out of dyeing it again by showing him how much his little girls look like him with their blonde hair, showing him how he so obviously looks like their father and that is enough to sway him away from the black hair dye! seeing how much his twin girls look like him just makes him so full of love, so full of pride and happiness… not to mention some more smug attitude as he shoves it in your face, shoves their resemblance to him all in your face, lovingly…

[eatmarcus]

this is giving me heart burn

[child0feden]

HOME

øystein “ euronymous ” aarseth x pregnant! reader

- general headcanons for øystein with a pregnant partner!

i do not know why or how but i wrote this in like five minutes lol <3

- view my metal masterlist here

reading music recommendations: aint no grave by crooked still - witching hour by mayhem

- this entirely grown up man has the most deadly serious one sided rivalry with your pregnancy pillow!

✩ øystein just absolutely despises it and cannot believe you are seriously choosing to cuddle a damn pillow over him, he glares down at it with such burning hatred in his eyes every single night before you go to sleep…

- you try telling him that it is just kind of comfier than him right now but he does not believe it, he cannot believe it because how? he says you must just be having a bit of pregnancy brain and not thinking straight because there is no way a pillow is comfier than him

✩ you went through quite a little bit of your pregnancy making him sleep on the couch in the living room of your shared apartment because you just absolutely hated his immense body heat, it was the absolute worst time of his life! he did not fully realise just how much better it was to sleep with you in a comfy bed until it was suddenly stripped away from him…

- he absolutely fights to paint the nursery black, like he really puts up an insanely strong fight and says if it is any child of his, they will definitely love black

✩ it takes you at the very least a month to drill the answer of “ absolutely not ” into his little stubborn head

- but you probably do let him paint the mayhem logo somewhere in the room, just to give him something sweet…

✩ øystein tries to convince you to buy so many black baby clothes too, using the excuse of not knowing the gender and how black works on any gender! if it was up to him, the baby would look like they were attending a funeral every single day of their lives

“ vakker! please, come on, just get black clothes for the baby! we don’t even know what they are yet so black would be perfect for a boy or girl ” ( he will continue trying to convince you on this for hours if he has to, do not underestimate his confidence and pure burning will )

- it really does not matter if you agree or not though, he will buy at least some black clothes for the baby anyways! and it does not stop even after you find out the gender…

✩ i am so sorry but i just absolutely love girl dads so of course i am making him one now

- honestly i can see this unlucky ass guy knocking you up with twins on his first try too…

✩ but i am not going to go too deep into that here

- when you guys went to get your very first ultrasound together, he acts like such an overgrown child

✩ the second the little blob that is your very much still growing baby appears on the screen, he is making a semi grossed out and almost confused sounding “ eugh ” before you gently smack him on the shoulder, holding in your own snort at the sight of him with a scrunched up nose and confusion all over his face as he tries to decipher what it is that he is looking at

- øystein gently scoots the doctor aside and gets way too up close to the little black and white screen, proclaiming that yep, this baby will be a metalhead alright!

✩ how exactly did he get that from a blob of cells on an insanely grainy black and white screen? do not ask him questions like that, just trust him

- he practically demands the doctor print off at least ten of these ultrasound pictures, wanting to give some to his family and show off a few to his friends

✩ øystein shows the picture off just so much, he has probably even showed completely random customers in helvete, pulling the picture out of the pocket of his black leather jacket in the midst of ringing them up and telling them to “ check out his blob ”

- some of them probably have absolutely no idea what they are looking at and he sees that so clearly in their baffled faces, giving an overly dramatic huff and saying it again, but fixing his statement to be “ check out my baby ”

✩ he thinks it is freaky as hell when you go back again some time later and now it has grown legs and like, an actual little body and stuff… do not even get me started on how weirded out he gets when he sees the baby move around through the screen…

- honestly, that is when it really and truly fully sank in for him that holy shit he is having a baby, a literal child, a living being in just a few months! like you are really growing his child inside of you

✩ øystein was unusually quiet during that whole appointment, only giving quick head nods and husky mumbles when you spoke to him… at first you are scared as hell, thinking that maybe he might be having second thoughts about having a baby and is gonna leave you

- but when you are back in your shared apartment sitting together on the couch, he is just all over you! hugging you so tightly and kissing you all over your face, admitting that he is pretty damn scared but so damn excited

✩ øystein really hopes they come out wanting to learn how to play the guitar as they get older, he just really wants to teach them everything he knows and watch as they climb up the skill ladder with their playing

- he buys so many little black bows, shoes and dresses! he does not give a single damn that your baby is going to look like she is going to a funeral every day, he thinks that looks cool!

✩ whenever you have really weird cravings, he is smart enough to just not comment on them at all…

- well, he learned to be smart enough not to comment on them because one time you broke down sobbing after he scowled at and called pickles with nutella “ nasty as hell ” right to your face as you were eating them in front of him

✩ øystein had to spend a little over an hour of that day comforting you and calming you down, quickly backtracking on what he said and lying right through his teeth

“ awh, vakker… i’m sorry, i didn’t mean to say that! it looks good really, very… unique and exotic ” ( he can barely even get the words out with cringing as he can still smell the mix of nutella and pickle juice in the air around him )

- when you did finally manage to calm down with his help and love, you absolutely made him take a bite of one to really show you he is genuinely sorry and oh wow, that poor man ate it like a champ

✩ well, kind of…

- he very almost gagged and vomited on the spot but held it down just for you! swallowing his chewed up bite and giving you an almost pained smile before gently kissing your head and telling you it was “ very good ” as he quickly walked off to grab some water to wash his mouth out

✩ so now he just keeps his lips completely zipped but he will absolutely have a major stink face when looking at some of your strange new craving creations

- øystein really gets kind of scared of you when your horny levels are at an all time high because of your heightened pregnancy hormones

✩ usually he is the one groping your boobs and holding your hips, littering kisses all down your neck and feeling you up but now it is like he is getting a taste of his own medicine…

- you are just all over him, basically not even letting him move because if he does you will get suddenly upset and claim he probably thinks you are just so ugly now and he never wants to fuck you ever again in your entire life together

✩ and obviously that is not at all true! øystein finds you so hot when you are pregnant, he is always fondling your boobs and whisking you off to the bedroom to let you ride him, always whispering the dirtiest but absolute sweetest things in your ear

“ y’look so beautiful carrying my baby, you know that? so beautiful… should knock you up again right after you have our girl, hm? love seeing you like this ” ( the fuck he will, you will be waiting at least a year before getting pregnant again )

- the very first time the baby kicks is actually when he was talking to it! they are so insanely reactive when it comes to him and his voice, it is just crazy

✩ he thinks the baby kicking looks so damn awesome, it looks like something straight out of a horror movie to him, but definitely really cute too

“ woah… how does that not hurt like crazy, baby? she’s really beating up your insides, huh? ” ( he is so unserious about things he says but you can see this gleam of just pure true love in his eyes as he observed his baby reacting to his voice )

- he loves to come up behind you and gently hold your baby bump up for you, helping you relieving the ache in your back as you lean back into him and feel his calloused hands softly stroking patterns into the skin

✩ øystein will tap your stomach as the baby kicks in response, slowly and softly swaying you back and forth in your place as he kisses your cheek

- another craving you probably get a whole lot is kebab food! you will wake øystein up at some utterly ungodly hour of the night, your eyes rimmed with tears whilst you whisper to him as he looks up at you with messy and tangled black hair spread across his pillow, his eyes still blinking rapidly as he wakes himself up

“ what? is something happening? what… you want food? god, seriously, vakker? no, it’s fine, don’t cry… i’ll… i’ll go get you some food, just let me get dressed… fuck ” ( he is not actually mad at you or anything! he is just very sleepy and kind of a slow sloth when he first wakes up )

✩ when grabbing your food from the kebab, he talks the poor shop owners ear off about how you pregnancy is going and how this is the third time this week that you have craved some kebab food, how he fears the baby might come and just be made of donor meat because of how much you eat it

- as if the shop owner does not know that though, øystein uses the same takeaway place just around the corner from your apartment every time and they are very familiar with you guys now, they will often put a lot of meat in your meal because they are really sweet people and øystein tips them well all the time under your demand

✩ øystein would absolutely play his guitar close to your baby bump, obviously not something crazy extreme and loud though!

- usually he will just play something short and low to teach the baby about what he does for a job, i might even say he sings to your stomach sometimes too! only when you are definitely sleeping though, he is so strangely embarrassed about it

✩ he often sings cute little norwegian lullabies and childrens songs remembers from when he was a child, making sure to be extremely quiet about it as to not wake you up

- he would just be such a partner and such good father <3

[child0feden]

Which mayhem member so you think is most likely to have a mommy kink? Lol

hmmm… honestly? i would say probably maybe øystein… i do not think that it would be like, one of his major kinks but i do think that it would be there buried deep underneath the surface and i feel like it would come out after a while of the two of you dating and having regular sex as well as engaging in other kinks together… he tries to hide it because well, it just makes him kind of embarrassed to think about it because what if his friends find out? what if anyone finds out? what if he admits it to you are you are just not into it?

but i do feel like his mommy kink would be more especially prevalent and much more purposeful in both the older! milf! reader x younger! øystein au as well as the dad! øystein x reader dad au too

in the older! milf! reader x younger! øystein i think it comes from how much of a natural sub he would become around you! i mean, he knows that so are so much more experienced than him both in general life as well as your sex life! in all literalness, you are a mother that he would both love to fuck and call mommy during the act… even if you are not a major dom, you just have a whole lot of power over him and he is always at your will, he loves to follow your demands and teaching and often times the word “ mommy ” just slips out of his mouth because of how fucked out he becomes when buried balls deep inside of you… like when you tell him to fuck you harder or you guide his hip movement a certain way as to let him reach deeper inside of your cunt? the word just slips out as he lets out an almost high pitched yet low “ yes, mommy ”

if it is older! dilf! reader x younger! øystein though, i cannot see him calling you “ daddy ” at all but i can see him calling you “ master ” or something similar because the same natural dominance just radiates from you and he feels so much smaller under your older and much more experienced gaze… like when you tell him to get down on his knees or you guide his back to arch a little more as he lays on his stomach beneath you? again, the word just comes to slip out of his eager to please mouth as he lets out a breathy and almost strangled sounding “ yes, master ”

when it comes to the dad! au, his mommy kink comes unraveled during your pregnancy! sorry but have you seen the pictures of him posing with porno magazines that have a pregnant woman on the front? just get out of here… he cannot get enough of fucking you when you are pregnant with his twin girls and as soon as your bump really starts to show and your tits start to lactate? it is game over and he could not hide his kink if he tried anymore, he cannot get enough of telling you how lucky his babies are going to be to have you as their mommy and when he starts sucking your tits during sex? he just loves calling you mommy so much, it just feels so right… he loves mumbling “ feel so good inside, mommy ” whilst burying his hard cock into your cunt and “ fuck… tastes so good, mommy ” whilst sucking milk from your sensitive tits…

his kink only doubles after you give birth to his twin girls too! he will always be coming up behind you and hugging your hips with a soft yet firm grip before mumbling something like “ you look beautiful today, mommy ” into your ear! because he thinks you do make a beautiful mother and he only finds you even more attractive than he already did after you give birth to his children and just because he likes to tease you a little and feel you squirm… seeing the changes to your body after the birth, watching you act so motherly to his perfect children, all of it just eggs on his already revealed mommy kink so much…

thanks for asking, anon! i hope i explained this well lolol <3

[child0feden]

BLACK METAL DAD AU MASTERLIST

here, you can find any and all works that take place in my black metal dad au series! these are mostly fluff to the maximum but some are smut during pregnancy or breeding kinks and so on! my first metal masterlist can be found here and my second metal masterlist can be found here <3

✩ next to a title symbolises a personal favourite!

request status: open!

HEADCANONS

TAKE MY HEART - PREGNANCY HC

- general headcanons for pelle with a pregnant partner!

FAR AWAY - GIRL DAD HC ✩

- general headcanons for pelle as a girl dad!

MOON IN THE MIST - BOY DAD HC

- general headcanons for pelle as a boy dad!

BEARS AND BIRTHDAYS - FLUFF HC

- general headcanons for pelle celebrating his daughters birthday!

VOCAL COACHING 101 - FLUFF HC

- general headcanons for pelle teaching his daughter to sing like him!

THOUGHTS

dad au timeline - a rough timeline of the dad au

baby names - baby names in my dad au

teething - how they would handle teething

words - what their childs first word would be

bullying - how they would handle bullying

curiosity and explanations - soft scar explanations from dad! pelle

craftsmanship with love - wood carvings with dad! pelle

wannabes - attempting to replicate pictures with dad! pelle

HEADCANONS

SOMETHING GOOD - PREGNANCY HC

- general headcanons for bård with a pregnant partner!

A LIFE TO LIVE - GIRL DAD HC ✩

- general headcanons for bård as a girl dad!

THOUGHTS

dad au timeline - a rough timeline of the dad au

baby names - baby names in my dad au

teething - how they would handle teething

words - what their childs first word would be

runaway toddler - how they would keep ahold of their toddler

bullying - how they would handle bullying

prison visits - visiting dad! bård in prison

matching mittens - a snow day with dad! bård

fatherhood and fawning - protectiveness with dad! bård

morning bliss - early morning cartoons with dad! bård

a wish for more - conjugal prison visits with dad! bård

everlasting love - memories of being pen pals with dad! bård

noogies - teenhood and noogies with older dad! bård

HEADCANONS

HOME - PREGNANCY HC ✩

- general headcanons for øystein with a pregnant partner!

PLASTIC TIARAS ARE METAL - GIRL DAD HC

- general headcanons for øystein as a girl dad!

THOUGHTS

dad au timeline - a rough timeline of the dad au

baby names - baby names in my dad au

teething - how they would handle teething

words - what their childs first word would be

runaway toddler - how they would keep ahold of their toddler

bullying - how they would handle bullying

coca cola baby babies - halloween costumes with dad! øystein

HEADCANONS

MILK AND COOKIES - NSFW HC ✩

- nsfw headcanons for vegard with a pregnancy kink and lactation kink!

THOUGHTS

baby names - baby names in my dad au

teething - how they would handle teething

words - what their childs first word would be

bullying - how they would handle bullying

baker among other things - craving baking with dad! vegard

an unfortunate much needed haircut - buzz cut with dad! vegard

HEADCANONS

nothing here… yet!

THOUGHTS

baby names - baby names in my dad au

runaway toddler - how they would keep ahold of their toddler

HEADCANONS

nothing here… yet!

THOUGHTS

dad au timeline - a rough timeline of the dad au

baby names - baby names in my dad au

HEADCANONS

nothing here… yet!

THOUGHTS

baby names - baby names in my dad au

HEADCANONS

nothing here… yet!

THOUGHTS

baby names - baby names in my dad au

HEADCANONS

nothing here… yet!

THOUGHTS

baby names - baby names in my dad au

HEADCANONS

nothing here… yet!

THOUGHTS

cute as a button - assorted things

baby names, with terje bakken - baby names in my dad! terje au

[child0feden]

okay so, who do we think is the most likely black metal dad to put one of those children leash and harness on their kid?

part of me wants to say that and older! dad! bård would absolutely have put one on his second daughter because unlike his first, she was not shy and timid as a child at all! she was much more adventurous and could not stand nor sit still to save her life, when she began being able to walk all on her own? it was so beyond over for both of you and you could not take your eyes away from her for even a split second without her running off somewhere but even then, she would probably still find a way to slip away with her silent little toddler steps… obviously this would always cause bård to panic like crazy until he finally found her just a couple feet away from him and thankfully not in any danger! so eventually he just got one of those little leashes for her and he probably felt kind of horrible for making her wear it and his eyes would always soften so much whenever she looked up at him with big sad puppy dog eyes but he seriously cannot handle the panic that losing her for a quick second brings, especially since he is a bit older now! he literally thinks he is having a major heart attack every time she wanders off and the leash just makes him feel more comfortable, it makes him feel more at ease knowing that she is always stuck right by his side…

but then another part of me just thinks he would always hold her in his arms! and what little girl, especially his little girl, does not absolutely adore being held in her fathers arms? or even being sat up on his shoulders and with his height? she absolutely loves being able to sit on his shoulders and make silly faces at whoever he is talking to! being up high on his shoulders also means she gets to see a whole lot more from up above so she does not get bored and want down at all

of course dad! øystein is an automatic child leash user though… that poor man has two devilish twin girls and you seriously think he is not about to use a double leash for them whenever he takes them out? get out of here! that child leash is the greatest purchase he has ever made in his entire life, it saves him from going through so much of the stress and panic that comes with toddlers wandering off in mere seconds and sometimes the sight of his two evil little girls attached to harnesses just kind of makes him laugh… especially when they get all pouty and grumpy because they realise they cannot just run off and away from his side whenever they see something that peaks their interest…

[child0feden]

COCA COLA BABY

selfish ass dad! øystein absolutely dresses his twin girls up as coca cola bottles for their first halloween and regrets nothing… he just smirks as you grumble and groan at the sight of him holding them in each arm, listening to you whine about how you already had the cutest little butterfly costumes ready for them only for him to dress them up as damn coca cola bottles… you do not even know where the hell he found the costumes, he must have got them custom made…

obviously i am kidding, he is not selfish, he just thought it would be really funny and hey, it is not like they are going to remember much of anything anyways! he will eventually sigh dramatically before going to remove the costumes and dress them in their adorable butterfly costumes but only after making you take multiple pictures of him holding them before taking the clunky old polaroid camera from your hands to take pictures of them himself, laughing and grinning so much behind the camera whilst you smile slightly and roll your eyes, watching him with your hands on your hips and shaking your head when you realise just how funny this is to him, just how much this has tickled his funny bone

dad! øystein who keeps the picture of his little baby coca cola bottles in his wallet, right next to a slightly unflattering picture of you that he took so suddenly and out of nowhere, your hair tied back and hands deep in soapy water as you wash dishes, your face slightly startled by the camera flash! seriously, giving this man a camera was the worst mistake known to man… he takes pictures of damn near everything and always complains when he has to buy refills for the camera as if he was not the one constantly using them up…

he shows the picture of his twin girls to everyone he knows, never able to look at it without cracking a boyish grin and chuckling as he holds it up for them to see! talking to them with total happiness in his voice as he tells them about how he finally managed to combine two of his favourite things in life! not including you, of course, you are in your whole own dedicated category so do not even worry about that! and he knows you would slaughter him if he ever showed the picture of you to anyone!

nowww… what do we think the other dads would dress their babies up as for halloween? i am very much in the spooky spirit you guys <3

[child0feden]

BABY NAMES, PART I

- okay, wether you guys want it or not, here are the names with their meanings found on websites and what i imagine some of the babies to look like! but i will never name them in the works so if you do not like these names, you can replace them for whatever you want, i would actually love to hear the names you guys think they would like or your thoughts on these that i chose! i know i am not all that great with names at all but i tried to pick nice ones and ones i think actually fit the father <3

PELLE “ DEAD ” OHLIN

dad! pelle has a daughter named calliope ohlin and a son named casper ohlin…

- calliope means “ beautiful voice ” from greek κάλλος meaning “ beauty ” and ὄψ meaning “ voice ” in greek mythology she was a goddess of epic poetry and eloquence, one of the nine muses!

calliope looks exactly like you! she has your hair, your eyes and just so many of your features, she looks like your twin! the only thing she inherited from pelle was his bone structure and that only really starts to show when she enters her teenage years! pelle absolutely loves this though, he thinks it was one of the major reasons he was able to open his heart to her so quickly after she was born, because she just looked so much like you… she was so undeniably your daughter, your child… whenever he looked at her soft face, looked into her gentle eyes, all he saw was a mini version of you, someone he knew he just wanted to shower in love and support, someone he knew he needed to protect…

casper is the opposite and looks exactly like pelle! he has his bright blue eyes, his blonde hair that only shines brighter in summer, his bony nose and a similarly indented chin! this is why in a similar opposite fashion, pelle felt it was harder to immediately bond with his son after the birth, he felt it was harder to open his heart to him because of how much of himself he saw in his son… how much she saw his younger self, how much he felt like he was looking into a mirror of the past! pelle was just so afraid of tarnishing your son, of somehow corrupting him and his happiness by simply being around him… because all he saw was his younger self, all he saw was the child so long ago that would soon run into so much cruelty and sadness in life! but of course, with a lot of support and reassurance from you that he would never hurt your son, that your son would only ever see him as his father, he was quick to open his heart to him too, just as he did for calliope…

as a father, pelle is beyond subtly proud of the name calliope for his daughter! he thinks it just fits her so well! he thinks she has such a creative soul, even when she was so young with her little messy finger paintings and scribbled crayon drawings, he immediately knew he had a strong creative and inspired soul… so much like him, as you say to him which always makes him blush and feel even more shy pride! and calliope is absolutely his muse, she became his muse right alongside you the second she was growing in your womb… he adored drawing you when you were holding her in your stomach and now, he loves to draw her as he sees her! every time he looks at her, he feels a rush of inspiration and a want to craft! both you and her are his muses, eventually his son too!

BÅRD “ FAUST ” EITHUN

dad! bård has a daughter named selene eithun…

- selene means “ moon ” in greek! this was the name of a greek goddess of the moon, a titan! she was sometimes identified with the goddess artemis!

selene looks almost exactly like bård but she does have a fair few of your features too! but when you look at her, you mainly see bård… she has his brown hair, his big brown doe eyes and his pronounced, naturally slightly pouted lips! she certainly got his height too! despite being a pretty short and petite child, she hit a major growth spurt in her teenage years and is just a little taller than the average girl! but when she was a newborn and toddler, she was definitely one of those chunky little babies! she had the chubbiest little apple red cheeks and pudgy arms, bård thought she was absolutely adorable and always claimed she just had to be the cutest baby in the world, she was too perfect to him! he loved peppering so many kisses to her chunky arms and chubby cheeks when she was a baby, he bathed in the glory that came with hearing her high pitched giggles and squeals as he did it, he could not get enough of seeing a gummy smile with just a few tiny teeth showing through stretching across her rosy red cheeks! it just manages to wash away so many of his insecurities, his fears that maybe he is not a great father…

when selene was a newborn, bård was very aware of the meaning of her name and got her a little astrology mobile to go in her crib instead of the usual sheep or animal one! not to mention how many glow in the dark stars and moons he stuck up on the ceiling of your shared bedroom in your apartment when her crib was in your room… bård thinks the name fits her so well, she is his treasure, his moon! when she is old enough to not choke on things, he buys both you and your daughter a matching necklace, both silver chains holding one half of a shiny moon! to be honest, a lot of his gifts to her in life, from the moment she was born, revolve around astrology and especially the moon! he is absolutely the type of father to fully support her childhood dream of wanting to become an astronaut!

older! bård definitely gets a moon tattooed somewhere in his arm sleeve tattoo, likely when she is in her teenage years! it is a beautiful tattoo dedicated just to his moon… he likely has a star tattooed somewhere on his body too but from when he was younger, it was one of his first few tattoos and it was dedicated you, his special star, the love of his life and mother of his child!

ØYSTEIN “ EURONYMOUS ” AARSETH

dad! øystein has identical twin girls named alva aarseth and audra aarseth…

- alva is the feminine form of alf! derived from old norse alfr meaning “ elf ” in norse legend this was the name of king, the suitor of a reluctant maiden named alfhild! she avoided marrying him by disguising herself as a warrior, but when they fought she was so impressed by his strength that she changed her mind!

✩ audra means “ storm ” in lithuanian!

both alva and audra just look like complete doubles of øystein, they look like factory made female replicas of him! sometimes you spend minutes studying their faces, trying to find any traces of your own genes in their appearance but you find very few… they have his natural blonde hair, his small button nose, his soft face and so on… they just mirror all of his physical features! and it only got more and more noticeable as they got older, especially in their teenage years when both decided they wanted to dye their hair black after looking at old pictures of their father! øystein went through a crisis in the early months of their lives, he liked to dress them identically because he thought it was funny to see double of his baby but the humour would quickly turn into panic when he realised he could not decipher who was who… that is why the both of you spend time stitching their names into clothes whenever they get new dresses or onesies! he does get much better at knowing who is who within a couple of months, he just found little ways to differentiate them! and that is when he finds it funny to dress them in the same outfits once again, seeing them in the exact same outfit, with the exact same ribbons in their hair just makes him laugh so much! øystein is also incredibly smug about how much they look like him, he is just so smug and proud…

whenever a storm rolls around, with rain hitting against the glass windows of your shared apartment, øystein likes to hold audra on his hip and stand in front of one of the windows, looking down at her as shadows of water droplets reflect inside through the window and against her curious face, watching with a small smile as her wide eyes follow the raindrops and her little hands grasp his sweater tightly… audra lives up to her name in two ways! one way being that she loves storms, she was never scared and afraid of rainstorms or thunderstorms! she always just wanted to sit at the window with her father whilst you built a pillow fort with alva! the second way being that she was an absolute storm of a child… she was hyper and rowdy, every time after playing, the apartment would look like a tornado had run through it!

VEGARD “ IHSAHN ” TVEITAN

dad! vegard has a daughter named violet tveitan…

- violet is derived from the english word violet for the purple flower, ultimately derived from latin viola! it was common in scotland from the 16th century, and it came into general use as an english given name during the 19th century!

violet is a very balanced mix between both you and vegard! she has your eyes but his frizzy and curly black hair, she has your nose but his mouth and an abundance of other little features… both you and vegard see the others features so strongly in her! he thinks she looks like your twin and you think she looks like his! the only thing the two of you can absolutely agree on is that your genes never stood a chance when it came to his hair! literally the second you told him you were pregnant, he knew that baby was going to have his hair, he just knew it! because the hair type is pretty particular and specific when it comes to care and washing, vegard likes to be the one to help her with it! he is more than happy to help you learn how to deal with her hair better too, obviously, but nothing makes him happier than sitting her on his knee and tying her frizzy black hair into little pigtails with little purple ribbons…

i feel like the name violet would come after a lot of thought with vegard, he was thinking about names every day right after you told him you were pregnant! but the two of you could just never decide on a name, nothing rolled off the tongue right before violet popped into his head when he saw you, late in your pregnancy with a very sizeable bump, wearing a deep violet maternity dress… he just thought the colour was beautiful on you, hugging your bump that cradled his baby… once the name was decided, ihsahn was determined to paint her already prepared wooden crib a light violet purple before you gave birth! not to mention how many little violet bows and outfits he buys for her with what little money he has… i feel like he would even switch his usual guitar picks to glittery violet purple picks just for her, to honour his little girl during emperor shows in the most subtle yet thoughtful way!

a slight bonus one here because i have not made his dad! headcanons yet but i wanted to include him <3

VARG “ COUNT GRISHNACKH ” VIKERNES

dad! varg has twins with the daughter being named vígdís vikernes and the son being named vidar vikernes…

- vígdís is derived from the old norse elements víg “ war ” and dís “ goddess ”

✩ vidar derived from old norse víðarr, which was possibly derived from víðr “ wide ” and herr “ army, warrior ” in norse mythology víðarr was the son of odin and grid! at the time of the end of the world, ragnarök, it is said he will avenge his fathers death by slaying the wolf fenrir

whilst vígdís and vidar are twins, they are not identical twins! they actually look pretty different from each other… surprisingly, vígdís looks more like her father whilst vidar looks look you! it turns into a kind of daddys girl and mamas boy situation too… at first, varg was not a super overly loving and father towards his little girl, it took him some time to fully open his heart to a daughter, took him a little while to allow her to practice braiding his long blonde hair with colourful ribbons! but he so obviously loves her, so obviously loves both her and his son! he softens a whole lot and almost entirely drops the front he was putting up of being a headstrong and ignorant guy! when he sees how happy it makes her to be able to play with his long hair and feels his hands braiding her hair, it is worth it… it is beyond worth it for him! with vidar, i think varg would really want him to toughen up and be a manly man, even as a child but that is extremely quick to drop too! especially when you tell him it is just… really not okay, that it will only upset his son and feel like he can never be good enough! he drops all of his bullshit after a good talking to from you because deep down all he wants if for you and his children to be happy…

no one in this world can convince me that varg would not want to name his twins some really norse names, some really strong and kind of uncommon names! he spent months during your pregnancy reading through mythology and history books, looking for meaningful names, unique names… he wants names that highlight their norse blood! even if you, their mother, yourself are not… i have no doubt in my mind that he would have at least two songs inspired by their names, made for them! the first majorly soft thing varg did towards your son was buy him a little wolf plushie from a store! it is kind of ironic considering the mythology lore behind vidar and fenrir but it was cute nonetheless and the first bit of major affection he showed towards him when he was still a baby!

[child0feden]

Now I’m imagining how the dads would react if the kids get bullied

an easy answer for how they would react: the bully > meat grinder feet first > ice cream with you and their child after the job is done > rinse and repeat if another incident occurs with their child, they simply do not care <3

okay but let me actually go into this a little for you because ah! i’ve missed your guys’thoughts in my ask box hehehe! i’m gonna say the kids would be pre teens or early teens in this because middle school is always where i see the most bullying!

dad! pelle would be a very mixed bag of emotions because he just knew this would happen, he knew it would happen and he blames himself so much… he is so angry and upset at himself for not being able to protect her from everything… even when your daughter was so small and innocent, he feared that her teenhood would become like his, riddled with such cruel people and loneliness but you always assured him that you, both of you, would not let that happen to her… and now it is, he knows it is no matter how much she tries to hide it with her fake smiles and obvious lies about how school is going great! he is so quick to act on what he sees in her, so quick to jump into action and sit her down one day, trying his absolute best to get her to really open up to him about how she actually is and just what is happening… you likely stay out of this, letting him get the truth out of her due to just how familiar he is with what she’s facing, offering love and support from the sidelines to both of them before and after their chat… when your daughter falls asleep later that night after opening up to him about everything going on, she falls asleep in your bed in between the two of you just like she used to when she was so small all those years ago, wanting nothing more than to be cocooned in her parents love! pelle will lay awake for a bit after she falls asleep, letting you reach a hand over to stroke his and comfort him… making sure he knows he did nothing wrong and there was nothing he could have done to prevent this, that you guys will let her stay home until this is sorted and speak to her school in the morning or even let her move schools if she would prefer it but that slight disappointment and anger in himself will stick with pelle for a little bit, just until he sees your daughter begin giving those beaming, real smiles once more… he just needs to see that she is not sinking into a pit as he once did before he can fully feel better… if he was younger, he would probably go about leaving dead animals on the kids doorstep but he’s older now and as much as thought might slither into his head, he knows it isn’t the right way to go about it and knows it might just make things worse for your daughter…

dad! bård goes fucking insane, sorry not sorry! he is the type of dad who you literally have to physically stop from killing someones child because they fucked with your child… i can really see him having a super shy and insecure yet passionate daughter, he knows exactly what that is like and will not just sit by as she lets people walk all over her out of fear, out of being too much of a people pleaser to ever actually speak her mind! absolutely not, it just will not happen with his baby, his little treasure, his absolute pride and joy! just as any attentive and caring father would, he immediately clocks a sharp change in her usually shy yet bubbly attitude, noticing her grow more reserved and even more quiet around you guys when she would often delve into passionate yet soft rambles about things she was up to! he hears how silent she is at the dinner table and watches as she keeps her head ducked from the two of you… listen, if he cannot fight the kid bullying his daughter, he deadass wants to fight their parents because holy shit they raised a kid who thinks they can just walk all over his babygirl like that? they clearly did a terrible job and need their brain knocked back into place or something… bård is absolutely the type of dad to pull his baby out of school immediately until this shit is sorted out, taking you and your daughter out every day to wherever she wants to go, wether it be to get some ice cream or take a walk in nature or even just go shopping for whatever she wants to buy! but he will let you push him to leave you at home for at least one of these days, letting you tell him that maybe it would be good for the two of them to just have a daddy - daughter day and who is he to say no to that? especially when he knows his little, or not very little anymore, girl adores and looks up to him so much…

dad! øystein also goes insane but in less of a violent way and more of a strategic yet petty way… he just wants to completely ruin the lives of everyone involved with that kid, wants to fuck with them so badly and make their lives hell as revenge for his baby… maybe it’s a cliche but with twins, it’s like one is popular and the other is more of an outcast lone wolf, i can see that being very true for his twin girls! one ends up becoming pretty popular and well liked in school whilst the other becomes kind of lonely and often picked on for no particular reason! øystein absolutely hates this, it is just so… stupid to him! i think he would be kind of, just slightly, disappointed in the other twin for not helping and looking out for her sister when in school! he definitely sits her down and asks her why she never helped or told you guys, quickly getting beyond confused as she explains just how complicated school is now… he cannot remember it being so trivial and split up when he was a young teen… do not be surprised if you wake up one night and find euronymous sitting in the kitchen drinking a coke and flipping through same papers which hold just about all of the dirt he could possibly find on the kids family…

dad! vegard is the most logical and levelheaded one, to be honest! obviously, he is insanely angry and upset to hear that his child is going through something like this but he really knows how to keep his head and just get things dealt with to make life better for his child, to make them have a happy teenhood and make sure they do not have to go through bullshit like this! vegard will very calmly go to see the head of her school in person, speaking slowly and remaining as civil as he can be whilst he very obviously, but slyly, threatens the school with legal action if they do not sort their shit about as soon as possible… i feel like your child would actually open up to him incredibly quickly without him even needing to prod at them much, he just has that warm and comforting dad feel to him, so welcoming and not judgmental at all… after your daughter let’s so much out to him, he lets her just fall asleep in the midst of a tight hug, lets her fall asleep in his arms and does not even attempt to move until you come up from behind him and tell him he cannot sleep on the couch and to at least take her to bed, which he does! carrying her as if she weighs nothing and tucking her into bed just as he used to, planting a soft kiss on her frizzy hair that mirrors his before he leaves…

so, yeah! i really just think they would all be pretty similar in how they want to deal with the situation but different in the ways they actually deal with it! either way, all of them are beyond upset that this is happening and show so much love to their babies after it all comes to light, not that they did not before! they just show extra love now, really making sure they know how adored they are by you guys, how loved they are

thank you so much for the interesting ask anon! i miss getting more of these ones hehe <3

[child0feden]

TEETHING

about to go to sleep but i was thinking about how some of my favourite men would handle seeing their baby go through the teething process because i think some would definitely handle it way worse than others… obviously no one likes to watch their baby cry and not be able to do much to soothe the pain but i just think some of them would take it especially bad and just be so sad… sorry for any major spelling errors or anything here, super tired but wanted to get this out lolol…

i feel like the ones to handle it the worst would absolutely be dad! bård and dad! pelle… like urgh! they would just feel so beyond helpless and useless, being completely unable to really do much to relieve the pain their baby has just absolutely destroys the already little confidence they have in their parenting abilities, makes them feel like such terrible parents and they almost always want to cry right alongside their baby because of the stress, lack of sleep and general sadness from not being able to help more than they already have! they sort of just run around like headless chickens through the whole teething process, eye bags and migraines growing by the day as they constantly get new ice chew toys from the freezer, refusing to sleep and let you look after the baby when you tell them to rest, knowing they wouldn’t even be able to get to sleep if they tried because of the worry consuming their mind! they almost hand you the baby but only because their insecurities were making them believe maybe your baby would be in less pain in your arms, that maybe they are doing something wrong and somehow hurting the baby more but they quickly throw that idea out of the window when their baby tightens a chubby fist around their long hair, as if sensing their idea and refusing to be out of their arms, so they instead just bring them closer to their chest, holding them tightly

it really does not matter how much you try to comfort them about how they’re doing all they can for their babies, they just cannot help but feel like total failures, as if they are just letting their babies feel all of that pain and not even trying to help which could not be further than the truth! when the teething process is over, they will need a good sleep, finally being able to even think about getting some peaceful rest without being kept up by their screaming baby and worry clouding their minds but they will want to get their first sleep with your baby on their chest… just in case some pain suddenly comes back… just so that they can go to sleep smelling the scent of your babies hair and know that they are safe in their arms…

but i think dad! øystein and dad! vegard would surprisingly handle their babies teething quite well, at first they would definitely be a wreck with worry and stress but over time and after much reassurance from you that they are literally doing all they can, they would eventually just accept it and do the most they can do to comfort their babies, making silly faces down at them or blowing raspberries on their skin and peppering kisses on their chubby red cheeks, kissing their tiny tears away as they whisper softly about how the pain will lessen soon and they are doing so well, being so strong! just doing all they can to comfort and distract them from their pain

obviously, it does affect and upset them to see their babies so in pain and hurting but they just do not let it get to them, not after you have assured them that they are doing all they possibly can! they really do know that they have to be calm and collected, they have to be strong for their babies to help them through it, they have to hide their worry and just try to distract their babies, try to make them flash a gummy smile and forget their pain if even for just a second… and do they let their babies chew on their fingers if needed? well, obviously! all whilst cracking some jokes to you about how you might just have birthed some kind of vampire baby…

either way, all of them stay absolutely stocked the fuck up on ice chew toys… dad! øystein and dad! vegard bought way more than you even ended up needing before the teething process even started in preparation whilst dad! bård and dad! pelle bought too little than you needed because they did not realise just how bad the teething process would be and had to go to a small 24hr store in the early hours of the morning to buy many more on the first night <3

[child0feden]

PLASTIC TIARAS ARE METAL

øystein “ euronymous ” aarseth x reader x ( platonic! ) oc daughters

- general headcanons for øystein as a twin girl dad!

i love girl dads so much! i think øystein would like the name esmé but i could not really think of a second name he would like! what do you think? <3

- view my metal masterlist here

reading music recommendations: falling at your feet by daniel lanois - end of small sanctuary by akira yamaoka

- as previously mentioned in home, i really do think øystein would end up knocking you up with twins for your first pregnancy!

✩ and they are identical twins at that, it really is just his type of luck in life…

- at first, he absolutely thought he was kind of very unlucky to have knocked you up with twins on the first try

✩ like damn, this is his first time being a parent at all and he has two babies to care for? both at once? but as time goes by, i think he would be turn out to be so overly smug and proud of it! like yes, he did give you twins on his first try and what? that just means he has super sperm or something…

- when they were babies and even in their early toddler days, he stitched their full names into all of their clothes so that he would definitely never have even a slim chance of forgetting just who was who

✩ because let me be honest, he probably would forget, at least in the really early days of their life! it is not his fault they are literally identical babies

- this man is such a perfect twin girl dad, it is absolutely insane just how well he works as a girl dad and a twin girl dad at that

✩ øystein is a complete natural at holding them both at the same time, with one cradled in each of his arms as he talks to them about how they are going to be just so into metal when they get older and how he has so many killer records to show them

- well, maybe he was not exactly always a natural at holding them!

✩ at first he actually had a whole lot of trouble with being able to balance them each in one arm and would get super scared of accidentally dropping one but after a short amount of time and much reassurance from you that he would most likely not drop one of them, he would practically a pro

- even as his girls get older, he can still very easily hold them both on his hip as they talk his ear off about some cartoon or fairytale book they like at the minute

✩ he absolutely loves dressing them up in little matching outfits! he thinks it is just so funny to see double all the time and to make your families confused as to who is who when they visit

- øystein matches quite literally everything on them!

✩ from the colourful little ribbons in their blonde hair, frilly cotton socks, light up shoes, sparkling glitter laces… literally everything they wear is matching! he would have hated it if they were newborn because that is when he was still quite easily forgetting who was who but now with their names stitched into all of their clothes for family members and him knowing how to recognise who is who much easier, he thinks matching them is just so damn funny

- having you and two daughters, øystein gets very good at doing neat little braids and other simple hairstyles for them, he always has at least three spare hair ties settled around his pale wrist

✩ he is super smug about how good his skills are now, always carefully carrying your twins in his arms and coming to show off the braids to you as he talks himself up in front of you

“ look at them, vakker! that is pure talent, real craftsmanship! i’m better than you now, huh? don’t get too jealous… ” ( his ego is so easily inflated, please humble him by pointing out a messy section or something! kidding, obviously you think it is very cute just have proud of himself he is )

- øystein will never ever get over those early morning cuddles with you and his girls, it is the most at peace he has ever felt and likely ever will feel in life, even if the twins like to spread out like starfish and have him on the very edge of your shared bed…

✩ he can never ever fight off the girls when they want to have tea parties or dress up with them!

- if he even tries to say no, which he very rarely does anyways, they will just be putting on their best matching puppy eyes up at him as he stares down at them with a quickly softening face at the sight

✩ he could not ever say no to even one pair of puppy dog eyes let alone two…

- because of that, i firmly believe that øystein would absolutely be the parent who is always kind of just getting taken advantage of by their children

✩ the little twin girls are very much aware of how to get him to say yes to literally anything and buy them anything they want, they are absolute devils who are way too spoiled

- you are not all that much better though, they look so much like him so you can very rarely say no to them

✩ when øystein does have little tea parties with the twins, it is always an incredible sight to behold…

- he will be slightly hunched over a little play table with a shiny sliver plastic tiara placed atop his head as the twins, dressed in big poofy princess dressed, talk in exaggerated accents to him, if he ever catches you taking a picture what is happening, he will roll his eyes and let out an overly dramatic sigh before flipping you off the second the twins are not looking

✩ you know how children will often go through that little phase of attempted veganism when they find out meat comes from cute animals?

- yeah well that absolutely happened with his twins and it was easily the funniest yet most upsetting period of øysteins life…

✩ it was hilarious because he just thought they were just so adorable, trying so very hard to stop themselves from looking over at his plate when he had meat and they did not by their own choice

- it was also incredibly upsetting to him because he just loved getting kebab with them on the weekends

✩ but i feel like because of this, he absolutely knew this phase simply would not last long at all

- øystein knows his girls just love kebab food far too much, the routine is far too common for them

“ this won’t last long, vakker… i’m telling you, when the weekend comes, they’ll want their kebab… mark my words! ” ( as much as he thinks their attempted veganism is admirable and very funny, he will never give up their weekend kebabs )

✩ there is no way his girls would not come out of you absolutely loving kebab food, there is just no way in hell that it would be possible

- after you craved it so much whilst pregnant? it was almost a guarantee they would love it! and øystein could not be happier about it, of course his girls love kebab, they are certainly his girls alright!

✩ after about a week of attempted veganism from the twins, they quickly give up when the weekend arrives and øystein comes home from band practice with kebabs in hand…

- he bought some for them too, of course he did! he knew the second they saw it, they would switch up so fast on animals and that they did

✩ you guys eat on the couch together as a family, the little twins huddled up between you two as their eyes stay glued on the afternoon cartoon playing on the small tv and their fingers never dropping their forks as øystein smirks down at them before turning to you with a sly gleam in his eyes

“ told you, vakker… didn’t i tell you? it was over before it even started, they’re too much like me to be vegans! ” ( you just roll your eyes but you know he is absolutely right… )

- i feel like øystein would love buying them plushies! and he always gets plushies that align a bit more with his interests as well as being cute for kids, like this or something similar

✩ when they were just newly born, he bought them a little blankie plushie each with their names stitched in cursive on the blanket section, it was another very easy way for him to see who was who in the early days

- when they are eventually old enough, he absolutely buys them two little mini guitars for christmas! they always absolutely love watching him play and he loves trying to teach them how to play! he says they are absolute naturals in the field of music

✩ øystein takes them to band practices sometimes too, mainly just to give you some peace and time to relax! pelle usually stays a little distance away due to his general dislike for children but he will smile at them just a little to be nice, he thinks twins are very unique and fascinating, he appreciates their interest in music at least

- but jan and jørn would definitely be the overly fun and cool uncles though, jan will always lift them up on his drum stool and let them play around with the sticks whilst øystein watches from in front with a coke held in hand, just admiring his little girls <3

[child0feden]

by the way, it is only right for me to tell you guys that dad! øystein absolutely tells his children to leave a kebab and a glass of coca-cola out for santa because “ that’s just what he likes ” cookies and milk, who? what? no way! kebab and coco-cola is the way to go for santa, definitely…

and there is not a scrap of food nor a drop of drink left for his children to see in the morning…