#do i make my writing meaningless by acknowledging that i dont juxtapose to convey meaning - meaning coalesces in juxtaposition
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#i mean i gotta have some weird freudian stuff in here right#i think that like 90% of my writing style gets made sense of once you realise that my trains of thought follow similar patterns as etymology#'how are THOSE things connected'#well you see. through 6 degrees of separation#like precision caesura and cement#can make connections really well#not so good at interpreting them tho#i wonder if that defeats their purpose#i mean does it nullify any meaning that couldve been there#do i make my writing meaningless by acknowledging that i dont juxtapose to convey meaning - meaning coalesces in juxtaposition#and the juxtaposition is just for fun#im...#oh my god am i just putting all my toys in a row?#maybe i am#'that was a nice shape now if i do it /another/ way'#the point of the thing is the connecting. not like. some kind of meaning that i have in my head#im not making connections to convey meaning im making connections /to make connections/#i think that makes me a bad artist#or at least it makes my art bad#i still have fun with it so maybe im not a bad artist#but i wil admit to this and not promise to stop#i think THAT makes me a bad artist probably#bc if i really cared about... art. good art. meaningful art. then i would not be content with making meaningless art#once i realised thats what im doing. right?#an artist with integrity would do something else#'i shouldnt do this but i am and im not gonna stop'#'i should...apologist for something?'#i also believe subconsciously theres somethingimmoral to sharing art that you dont believe to be. like. of quality#i think it's fine to make art that is not the best you could have done. but if you share it with the world THEN that becomes immoral#i dont know why i believe that. it's probably about integrity again
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