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nummero123 · 2 years

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Best Email Marketing Tools in 2021

To promote your products and services, email marketing solutions are highly handy and cost-effective.

They're particularly useful marketing tools for tiny firms that lack technological expertise.

In 2017, there were more than 3.7 billion worldwide email subscribers, with that figure anticipated to rise to 4.3 billion by 2022.

Any marketer would be foolish to pass up such a chance.

Remember, for every $1 spent on email marketing, businesses can expect to receive a return of over $38.

That's a 3800% return on investment.

What Is Email Marketing and Why Do You Need It?

Marketers that use email to communicate with their target consumers are known as email marketers.

It may be used to both acquire new consumers and engage existing ones.

Email marketing helps you to nurture client loyalty and establish trust with your consumers.

You can keep them up to date on promotions, new product releases, discounts, and special deals.

This is a direct approach to communicate with your consumers on a channel that they choose.

Why is this?

Consumers, on the other hand, prefer brands to interact with them via email over other methods.

You send emails to persons who have given you their contact information and permitted you to send them emails.

This instantly filters out those who aren't interested, resulting in more effective email marketing.

With the aid of email marketing solutions, the ROI of email marketing can also easily measured.

All of these solutions give basic analytics statistics on open rates, click rates, and other parameters.

But how can you know which email marketing instrument is the most effective?

How Can You Choose the Best Email Marketing Tool?

Email marketing tools may aid in the management of your email list, client relationships, and email campaigns.

Is it true that all email marketing techniques are beneficial to you?

Here are some things to think about while deciding on the best solution for your company:

Integrations

Is your email marketing solution compatible with your customer relationship management (CRM) software?

It should also be simple to link with third-party apps and social networking sites.

You can better manage consumer data and monitor critical KPIs with a seamless connection.

You'll also have an easier time deciding which campaigns are more successful and which need to be tweaked.

Mobile-Optimization

According to an IBM survey, the majority of people prefer to read their emails on their mobile devices.

Mobile devices use to open 49.1% of all emails sent throughout the world.

In comparison, 33.3 percent of webmail messages read, while 17.6 percent of desktop messages read.

Select an email marketing platform with mobile-friendly templates.

Your recipients will be able to view your emails clearly on both mobile and desktop devices.

Features and Functionalities

Consider the following factors before selecting an email marketing tool:

Is it possible to do more with the service provider than just construct drip campaigns?

Is it possible to launch abandoned cart campaigns using it?

Are you able to track orders and tracking information?

Is it possible to automate product promotions in newsletters?

Is it possible to tailor customer answers to each request?

Are you able to successfully track, monitor, and analyze campaigns both during and after they have completed?

Depending on the size of your company, the number of emails you want to send, and the number of campaigns you need to conduct, choose one of these choices.

What Are the Benefits of Using an Email Marketing Tool?

Why should you use an email marketing platform in the first place?

Here are a few of the benefits of utilizing email marketing platforms:

Predesigned Templates

You don't have to create a campaign template every time you need to run one.

Email marketing systems provide a variety of templates that you may personalize to match your company's colours and themes.

These themes are compatible with Yahoo, Gmail, Outlook, and other email services.

Manage Your Email Lists

You may utilize email marketing services to manage your email list automatically.

They make segmenting your contacts and tracking the effectiveness of your ads a breeze.

You may also send customized mass emails to your target audience without fear of being branded as spam.

Analytics

These services can track who has opened your emails and which ones they have opened.

You can also see how many links a subscriber clicked on, as well as which subject lines were the most effective.

This data helps you to fine-tune your plan for improved outcomes.

Follow the Rules and Protect Your Reputation

The providers assist you in adhering to established email norms and regulations.

Consider the following scenario:

Email marketing software encourages you to give your subscribers an opt-out option.

They also ensure that when your subscribers get your emails, they may see your contact information.

If you use a Gmail or Yahoo account to send bulk emails, you run the risk of having your account suspended for spamming.

Email marketing solutions, on the other hand, enable you to send large numbers of emails without being labelled as spam.

What Are the Best Email Marketing Tools for Your Business?

Now that you've decided that you need a powerful email marketing tool for your company, it's time to choose one.

Do you want to know what the finest email marketing tools are?

We've found some fantastic email marketing platforms and solutions for you after considering the criteria we specified before.

We've highlighted the major features, benefits, cost, usability, and level of each tool so you can compare them side by side and choose the one that's right for you.

Are you ready to begin?

Pinpointe

Pinpointe's "Email Marketing Tool for Teams" is the ideal option for businesses that need to develop and deliver email campaigns with several employees.

For each team member, businesses and marketing agencies may establish unique user responsibilities such as campaign design, database administration, and reporting.

For each customer, agencies may create up to 500 different team accounts and specify or restrict what each team member has access to.

Pinpointe has one of the most user-friendly drag-and-drop editors we've encountered.

Companies can rapidly generate attractive, mobile-friendly emails using hundreds of themes and pre-made blocks, and they don't need to know HTML.

With the smart-segments function, you can precisely target your emails to suitable prospects.

Overall, if you want to perform email marketing at scale, this is the platform to use.

Sender

The sender is a powerful email marketing solution that can help both new and existing organizations succeed.

It enables businesses to achieve their objectives faster by giving essential features that allow them to advance their email marketing tactics.

You may pick from a variety of pre-built email templates in Sender, or you can design your own using custom components.

You can also make registration forms and pop-ups using Sender.

Their email automation function uses to manage abandoned carts, welcome emails, and personalized celebratory emails.

What's more, the nicest part about utilizing Sender is that it's free.

It has a free-for-life subscription that provides you access to all of the aforementioned features!

If you require assistance using this tool, you will have complete access to support 24 hours a day, seven days a week.

Features

Abandoned cart emails, welcome emails, and more can all be automated with smart email automation.

A drag-and-drop email design maker that is simple to use.

Library of free templates

Responsive emails

To expand your audience, use signup forms and pop-ups.

Management of advanced email campaigns

SendinBlue

Sendinblue is an excellent email marketing solution that can assist you in running efficient campaigns automatically and seamlessly.

Plus, there's more.

With only a few clicks and a drag-and-drop function, you can produce professional-looking newsletters.

Even pros with no coding experience may simply design appealing newsletters using their platform.

Its extensive segmentation capabilities allow you to target certain audience segments with the appropriate message.

Characteristics

CRM integration gives you access to contact information and analytics.

Contacts are limitless.

Bulk email support is available.

Email template library with a lot of options

Email subject lines and sending timings subjected to A/B testing.

Personalize your emails with dynamic content.

Omnisend

Omnisend is an emerging star in the automated marketing industry as an multichannel email marketing platform.

Omnisend, which focuses on email marketing, provides strong automation that not only allows you to automate your emails but also helps you enhance your email marketing outcomes across many channels.

Email, SMS, Facebook Messenger, online push notifications, WhatsApp, Viber, and more channels may all added to the same automated workflow with Omnisend.

You may gather information about subscribers from various contact points and develop multichannel marketing campaigns this way.

Characteristics

Forms for gathering email addresses

Email editor with a visual interface

More advanced segmentation

Micro-targeting

Critical email components subjected to A/B testing.

There are several click-rate-increasing solutions available. Gift Box and Product Picker

EasySendy

EasySendy is one of the most effective email marketing solutions available.

It not only lets you gather leads from a website, but it also allows you to send them automatic emails.

What sets it apart from the competition is that you may send emails to only those who did not open your previous campaign's emails.

Characteristics

Can make pop-ups, social registration buttons, and other things.

Custom fields in email lists that can searched.

Email maker and editor with drag-and-drop functionality.

Options for detailed email segmentation.

Drip automation flow builder with drag-and-drop functionality.

HubSpot Marketing Free Email

HubSpot is a full-featured email marketing platform created to aid organizations in their growth, no matter where they are in their path.

The application offers a free-for-ever subscription that allows you to send up to 2,000 emails every month.

You may upgrade to one of the premium tiers as your company grows and gain access to more features and advantages.

HubSpot's strength is that it provides all-in-one solutions for more than simply email marketing.

They allow you to customize email marketing by using data from your website. Live chat, a form builder, a CRM, and other tools are also available.

Characteristics

A drag-and-drop editor with an easy-to-use template builder

Goal-based templates that are ready-to-use and customizable.

Features such as A/B testing and sophisticated marketing automation

Options for audience segmentation based on membership in a contact list and stage in the lifecycle

Leadfeeder

Leadfeeder is an email marketing tool that offers a software solution for tracking website visitors.

You may gather additional information about your website visitors and then send bulk emails to encourage conversions after you know who visits your site.

What else is there to say?

This is without a doubt one of the greatest email marketing tools for small businesses since it helps you to locate leads by looking at who visits your website.

You may track down the businesses that have visited your site, see how they found you, and what their interests are.

You may send bulk emails to your leads and increase conversions this way.

Characteristics

CRM and email marketing systems have native and two-way integration.

Sends tailored emails to the appropriate decision-makers.

Leads of excellent quality

Constant Contact

Constant Contact is a simple email marketing platform that allows you to send mass emails.

You may use this tool to import customer information from email clients and spreadsheets.

Email sign-up forms may be customized and embedded on websites and Facebook pages.

It offers real-time reporting capabilities that allow you to keep track of clicks, email openings, social shares, and other metrics.

Characteristics

Welcome emails sent automatically

To improve your topic lines, use the subject line testing function.

A mechanism for ensuring delivery reliability

Contact segmentation based on actual metrics such as previous clicks.

Email workflows that triggered by click events

Emails are automatically resent.

List-building tools that work

Conclusion

For an efficient email marketing plan for your organization, you'll need email marketing tools.

These email marketing solutions, among other things, guarantee that your carefully crafted messages are not banned and that they reach your subscribers at the appropriate moments. They can assist in keeping your target audience interested and involve.

For the best service Connect with Nummero, Bangalore's top digital marketing agency in bangalore.

#Best Email Marketing Tools in 2021 #Digital Marketing Tips #Digital Marketing Strategy

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mostlysignssomeportents · 10 months

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America's largest hospital chain has an algorithmic death panel

It’s not that conservatives aren’t sometimes right — it’s that even when they’re right, they’re highly selective about it. Take the hoary chestnut that “incentives matter,” trotted out to deny humane benefits to poor people on the grounds that “free money” makes people “workshy.”

There’s a whole body of conservative economic orthodoxy, Public Choice Theory, that concerns itself with the motives of callow, easily corrupted regulators, legislators and civil servants, and how they might be tempted to distort markets.

But the same people who obsess over our fallible public institutions are convinced that private institutions will never yield to temptation, because the fear of competition keeps temptation at bay. It’s this belief that leads the right to embrace monopolies as “efficient”: “A company’s dominance is evidence of its quality. Customers flock to it, and competitors fail to lure them away, therefore monopolies are the public’s best friend.”

But this only makes sense if you don’t understand how monopolies can prevent competitors. Think of Uber, lighting $31b of its investors’ cash on fire, losing 41 cents on every dollar it brought in, in a bid to drive out competitors and make public transit seem like a bad investment.

Or think of Big Tech, locking up whole swathes of your life inside their silos, so that changing mobile OSes means abandoning your iMessage contacts; or changing social media platforms means abandoning your friends, or blocking Google surveillance means losing your email address, or breaking up with Amazon means losing all your ebooks and audiobooks:

https://www.eff.org/deeplinks/2021/08/facebooks-secret-war-switching-costs

Businesspeople understand the risks of competition, which is why they seek to extinguish it. The harder it is for your customers to leave — because of a lack of competitors or because of lock-in — the worse you can treat them without risking their departure. This is the core of enshittification: a company that is neither disciplined by competition nor regulation can abuse its customers and suppliers over long timescales without losing either:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/01/21/potemkin-ai/#hey-guys

It’s not that public institutions can’t betray they public interest. It’s just that public institutions can be made democratically accountable, rather than financially accountable. When a company betrays you, you can only punish it by “voting with your wallet.” In that system, the people with the fattest wallets get the most votes.

When public institutions fail you, you can vote with your ballot. Admittedly, that doesn’t always work, but one of the major predictors of whether it will work is how big and concentrated the private sector is. Regulatory capture isn’t automatic: it’s what you get when companies are bigger than governments.

If you want small governments, in other words, you need small companies. Even if you think the only role for the state is in enforcing contracts, the state needs to be more powerful than the companies issuing those contracts. The bigger the companies are, the bigger the government has to be:

https://doctorow.medium.com/regulatory-capture-59b2013e2526

Companies can suborn the government to help them abuse the public, but whether public institutions can resist them is more a matter of how powerful those companies are than how fallible a public servant is. Our plutocratic, monopolized, unequal society is the worst of both worlds. Because companies are so big, they abuse us with impunity — and they are able to suborn the state to help them do it:

https://www.cambridge.org/core/journals/perspectives-on-politics/article/testing-theories-of-american-politics-elites-interest-groups-and-average-citizens/62327F513959D0A304D4893B382B992B

This is the dimension that’s so often missing from the discussion of why Americans pay more for healthcare to get worse outcomes from health-care workers who labor under worse conditions than their cousins abroad. Yes, the government can abet this, as when it lets privatizers into the Medicare system to loot it and maim its patients:

https://prospect.org/health/2023-08-01-patient-zero-tom-scully/

But the answer to this isn’t more privatization. Remember Sarah Palin’s scare-stories about how government health care would have “death panels” where unaccountable officials decided whether your life was worth saving?

https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/26195604/

The reason “death panels” resounded so thoroughly — and stuck around through the years — is that we all understand, at some deep level, that health care will always be rationed. When you show up at the Emergency Room, they have to triage you. Even if you’re in unbearable agony, you might have to wait, and wait, and wait, because other people (even people who arrive after you do) have it worse.

In America, health care is mostly rationed based on your ability to pay. Emergency room triage is one of the only truly meritocratic institutions in the American health system, where your treatment is based on urgency, not cash. Of course, you can buy your way out of that too, with concierge doctors. And the ER system itself has been infested with Private Equity parasites:

https://pluralistic.net/2022/11/17/the-doctor-will-fleece-you-now/#pe-in-full-effect

Wealth-based health-care rationing is bad enough, but when it’s combined with the public purse, a bad system becomes a nightmare. Take hospice care: private equity funds have rolled up huge numbers of hospices across the USA and turned them into rigged — and lethal — games:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/04/26/death-panels/#what-the-heck-is-going-on-with-CMS

Medicare will pay a hospice $203-$1,462 to care for a dying person, amounting to $22.4b/year in public funds transfered to the private sector. Incentives matter: the less a hospice does for their patients, the more profits they reap. And the private hospice system is administered with the lightest of touches: at the $203/day level, a private hospice has no mandatory duties to their patients.

You can set up a California hospice for the price of a $3,000 filing fee (which is mostly optional, since it’s never checked). You will have a facility inspection, but don’t worry, there’s no followup to make sure you remediate any failing elements. And no one at the Centers for Medicare & Medicaid Services tracks complaints.

So PE-owned hospices pressure largely healthy people to go into “hospice care” — from home. Then they do nothing for them, including continuing whatever medical care they were depending on. After the patient generates $32,000 in billings for the PE company, they hit the cap and are “live discharged” and must go through a bureaucratic nightmare to re-establish their Medicare eligibility, because once you go into hospice, Medicare assumes you are dying and halts your care.

PE-owned hospices bribe doctors to refer patients to them. Sometimes, these sham hospices deliberately induce overdoses in their patients in a bid to make it look like they’re actually in the business of caring for the dying. Incentives matter:

https://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2022/12/05/how-hospice-became-a-for-profit-hustle

Now, hospice care — and its relative, palliative care — is a crucial part of any humane medical system. In his essential book, Being Mortal, Atul Gawande describes how end-of-life care that centers a dying person’s priorities can make death a dignified and even satisfying process for the patient and their loved ones:

https://atulgawande.com/book/being-mortal/

But that dignity comes from a patient-centered approach, not a profit-centered one. Doctors are required to put their patients’ interests first, and while they sometimes fail at this (everyone is fallible), the professionalization of medicine, through which doctors were held to ethical standards ahead of monetary considerations, proved remarkable durable.

Partly that was because doctors generally worked for themselves — or for other doctors. In most states, it is illegal for medical practices to be owned by non-MDs, and historically, only a small fraction of doctors worked for hospitals, subject to administration by businesspeople rather than medical professionals.

But that was radically altered by the entry of private equity into the medical system, with the attending waves of consolidation that saw local hospitals merged into massive national chains, and private practices scooped up and turned into profit-maximizers, not health-maximizers:

https://prospect.org/health/2023-08-02-qa-corporate-medicine-destroys-doctors/

Today, doctors are being proletarianized, joining the ranks of nurses, physicians’ assistants and other health workers. In 2012, 60% of practices were doctor-owned and only 5.6% of docs worked for hospitals. Today, that’s up by 1,000%, with 52.1% of docs working for hospitals, mostly giant corporate chains:

https://prospect.org/health/2023-08-04-when-mds-go-union/

The paperclip-maximizing, grandparent-devouring transhuman colony organism that calls itself a Private Equity fund is endlessly inventive in finding ways to increase its profits by harming the rest of us. It’s not just hospices — it’s also palliative care.

Writing for NBC News, Gretchen Morgenson describes how HCA Healthcare — the nation’s largest hospital chain — outsourced its death panels to IBM Watson, whose algorithmic determinations override MDs’ judgment to send patients to palliative care, withdrawing their care and leaving them to die:

https://www.nbcnews.com/health/health-care/doctors-say-hca-hospitals-push-patients-hospice-care-rcna81599

Incentives matter. When HCA hospitals send patients to die somewhere else to die, it jukes their stats, reducing the average length of stay for patients, a key metric used by HCA that has the twin benefits of making the hospital seem like a place where people get well quickly, while freeing up beds for more profitable patients.

Goodhart’s Law holds that “When a measure becomes a target, it ceases to be a good measure.” Give an MBA within HCA a metric (“get patients out of bed quicker”) and they will find a way to hit that metric (“send patients off to die somewhere else, even if their doctors think they could recover”):

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Goodhart%27s_law

Incentives matter! Any corporate measure immediately becomes a target. Tell Warners to decrease costs, and they will turn around and declare the writers’ strike to be a $100m “cost savings,” despite the fact that this “savings” comes from ceasing production on the shows that will bring in all of next year’s revenue:

https://deadline.com/2023/08/warner-bros-discovery-david-zaslav-gunnar-wiedenfels-strikes-1235453950/

Incentivize a company to eat its seed-corn and it will chow down.

Only one of HCA’s doctors was willing to go on record about its death panels: Ghasan Tabel of Riverside Community Hospital (motto: “Above all else, we are committed to the care and improvement of human life”). Tabel sued Riverside after the hospital retaliated against him when he refused to follow the algorithm’s orders to send his patients for palliative care.

Tabel is the only doc on record willing to discuss this, but 26 other doctors talked to Morgenson on background about the practice, asking for anonymity out of fear of retaliation from the nation’s largest hospital chain, a “Wall Street darling” with $5.6b in earnings in 2022.

HCA already has a reputation as a slaughterhouse that puts profits before patients, with “severe understaffing”:

https://www.nbcnews.com/health/health-news/workers-us-hospital-giant-hca-say-puts-profits-patient-care-rcna64122

and rotting, undermaintained facililties:

https://www.nbcnews.com/health/health-care/roaches-operating-room-hca-hospital-florida-rcna69563

But while cutting staff and leaving hospitals to crumble are inarguable malpractice, the palliative care scam is harder to pin down. By using “AI” to decide when patients are beyond help, HCA can employ empiricism-washing, declaring the matter to be the factual — and unquestionable — conclusion of a mathematical process, not mere profit-seeking:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/07/26/dictators-dilemma/ggarbage-in-garbage-out-garbage-back-in

But this empirical facewash evaporates when confronted with whistleblower accounts of hospital administrators who have no medical credentials berating doctors for a “missed hospice opportunity” when a physician opts to keep a patient under their care despite the algorithm’s determination.

This is the true “AI Safety” risk. It’s not that a chatbot will become sentient and take over the world — it’s that the original artificial lifeform, the limited liability company, will use “AI” to accelerate its murderous shell-game until we can’t spot the trick:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/06/10/in-the-dumps-2/

The risk is real. A 2020 study in the Journal of Healthcare Management concluded that the cash incentives for shipping patients to palliatve care “may induce deceiving changes in mortality reporting in several high-volume hospital diagnoses”:

https://journals.lww.com/jhmonline/Fulltext/2020/04000/The_Association_of_Increasing_Hospice_Use_With.7.aspx

Incentives matter. In a private market, it’s always more profitable to deny care than to provide it, and any metric we bolt onto that system to prevent cheating will immediately become a target. For-profit healthcare is an oxymoron, a prelude to death panels that will kill you for a nickel.

Morgenson is an incisive commentator on for-profit looting. Her recent book These Are the Plunderers: How Private Equity Runs — and Wrecks — America (co-written with Joshua Rosner) is a must-read:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/06/02/plunderers/#farben

I’m kickstarting the audiobook for “The Internet Con: How To Seize the Means of Computation,” a Big Tech disassembly manual to disenshittify the web and bring back the old, good internet. It’s a DRM-free book, which means Audible won’t carry it, so this crowdfunder is essential. Back now to get the audio, Verso hardcover and ebook:

http://seizethemeansofcomputation.org

If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this thread to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/08/05/any-metric-becomes-a-target/#hca

[Image ID: An industrial meat-grinder. A sick man, propped up with pillows, is being carried up its conveyor towards its hopper. Ground meat comes out of the other end. It bears the logo of HCA healthcare. A pool of blood spreads out below it.]

Image: Seydelmann (modified) https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:GW300_1.jpg

CC BY 3.0 https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/deed.en

#pluralistic #hca healthcare #Gretchen Morgenson incentives matter #death panels #medicare for all #ibm watson #the algorithm #algorithmic harms #palliative care #hospice #hospice care #business #incentives matter #any metric becomes a target #goodhart's law

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youkissedareaderinthedark · 8 months

Text

Part of It

Synopsis: Y/n has been the social media manager for the Argentina National Team for a few months now. She’s unofficially everyone’s favorite employee

young fem argentine reader x platonic argentina national football team

A/N: this fic will be regarding the entire team, but it will mainly feature: Alvarez, Fernandez, Molina, Garnacho, Messi, and De Paul, because those are the players I know the best.

more a/n: also please don’t be surprised if some of the info in this fic is false and the players are ooc, im not based in argentina so I could easily get a lot of these things wrong

. so

. for as long as you can remember, the only thing you’ve loved more than playing football is being behind a camera

. as a kid whenever you weren’t on the pitch itself, you were recording your teammates and friends, creating their own personal highlight reels

. and like every other kid in Argentina, you spent your entire childhood playing football

. but it wasn’t until you were a teenager when you started to discover your love for camera work

. it started when a teammate of yours asked you to record something for social media, initially as a joke

. but then the video got a couple hundred views, and you quickly began to love the feeling of creating something people can visually enjoy

. your teenage years were filled with football and videography

. then by the time your senior year came around, you knew you wanted to by apart of both scenes however you could in the future

. leading to your commitment to Cordoba National University with a major in communication and media studies

. you graduate in 2021, and spend a few weeks looking for jobs

. then you find Cordoba fc and their opening for a new social marketing manager

. you get hired within two weeks of applying as a social media manager

. because the Cordoba community is pretty small, you can spend a lot of time getting to know the players and the fans really well

. you learn a lot there, as it’s your first work experience for a professional football club

. you work there till the end of sepetmber/mid october, because through a few of your co-workers, you learn that Central Cordoba has an opening for social media manager

. which of course, you applied to and by the end of November, you’re part of the Central Cordoba staff

. it was a lot of fun; hanging out with players, befriending other staff, traveling with the team, and obviously, managing their social media

. you prove to be extremely efficient there, bringing in thousands of new fans

. which builds your reputation as an employee a lot

. and suddenly, you’re getting offers for different clubs around argentina

. only 1 stands out to you though

. Argentina’s national team offer

. because apparently, due to the world cup occurring at the end of the year, the communications directors wanted more publicity before the competition

. you obviously reply back, and a few weeks later you’re invited to their headquarters for an interview

. at first, you didn’t think you got the job because it took a while to hear back from the directors

. but then you wake up to yet another email waiting for you

. and you are officially argentina’s social media manager

. your first day is technically in april

. but you don’t meet any of the players until the end of that month

. you didn’t even know you were gonna meet the players that day so you were severely unprepared

. one moment you were making coffee with your co workers

. then lionel messi walks in beside rodrigo de paul

. they caught you by surprise

. both of them were really nice though

. you eventually learn that they all are

. your job mainly consists of filming the team together and managing the their social media accounts

. this is how you get to know each of the players

. you click with julian the most at first because of the age similarity

. he becomes your best friend within your first week

. any meetings that the both of you are included in are spent sitting on opposite sides of the room because you were told your friendship is “a disturbance to the work environment”

. you guys make it up by being attached to the hip before and after practices though

. a third of your camera roll is funny candid’s of julian

. you guys are bus seat partners and make fun out of annoying the other guys

. enzo is another close friend of yours

. you guys are always gossiping about something

. “did you hear about the new intern?”

. “apparently, somebody was found with somebody else in the break room after the meeting last week”

. “I swear he wasn’t even sick that one time, he was just at a party the night before”

. he tries to convince you to dye your hair like him

. and when you refuse, he lets you make up for it by helping him tone in

. you guys are always laughing together, no matter what the situation is

. you and molina have such a playful relationship

. you’re always making fun of him for no real reason

. he’s just trying to defend himself

. you do it for all of them, but his birthday photo dump is always the worst

. you two are always wandering around headquarters, looking for either someone to bother or something to entertain yourselves

. it always ends it great content though

. you have a soft spot for alejandro

. mostly because he has a crush on you and tries to play it off

. but you’ve known since the first few times of hanging out with him

. when you’re filming concent for the argentina pages, you’ll see alejandro trying to show off at least three times a video

. you find it hilarious

. the other guys tease him relentlessly for it

. you two are still good friends regardless

. he tries to be protective of you even though he’s literally four years younger than you

. again, you find it hilarious

. and he always gets shit from the other players

. leo is such a dad to you it’s funny

. he was so nice the first time you met him, and after that he unofficially adopted you as a daughter

. even though he’s only like 13 years older than you

. shows his care in small ways

. making sure you never get hit with a ball when you’re sitting in to a practice

. coming into your office when you’re both in headquarters to check on you

. making sure you’re safe when you’re traveling with the team

. whether it be just assigning another player to look after you or a whole ass bodyguard

. also protecting you from rodrigo

. because rodri is like an older brother to you

. super playful

. always teasing you

. agreesive type of love

. y’know those videos of rodri always picking up julian and stuff?

. like that but a smidge gentler

. this is where messi comes in

. insisting he put you down and let you do your job

. rodri also tries to convince you to get tattoos

. honestly that’s a whole team thing

. playful peer pressure is real there

. anyway

. you, julian, and enzo are such a trio

. getting up to the most random shit in other countries after games

. you guys were two seconds away from jumping into a canal in italy

. but then here comes leo

. scolding you guys like his children

. and sending you back to the hotel

. also, you have a jersey from almost every player on the team because before you got your own jersey, you always just picked someone random to wear on game days

. but then rodri started frowning when he saw you in julian’s jersey because apparently, you hadn’t worn his shirt in a few games

. and now you have a separate drawer just for jerseys

. oh and the world cup

. that was so fun for you

. traveling with the team to qatar

. hanging out in stadiums during practice, half upset because it felt like a million degrees

. but half in awe because holy shit you’re in qatar for the world cup

. you’re on the edge of your seat for every game

. the final almost killed you

. you were almost crying on the bench next to the other staff

. totally worth it though

. you started sobbing when montiel made the last penalty kick

. because you knew these guys, you knew how much they wanted it, how much they deserved it

. it was a mess of hugs and tears after that

. julian is grinning into your shoulder

. rodri tackled you

. enzo is basically jumping up and down

. you don’t think you’ll ever see alejandro that happy again

. you and molina are crying together

. and messi gives you the biggest hug

. it’s so fun celebrating with the team

. spraying champange with gonzalo

. singing along to music with paulo

. dancing around with lauatoro

. and coming back to argentina after that

. seeing all the fans in buenos aires, looking around and seeing argentine pride everywhere

. surreal

. there’s definitely no feeling like it

. which is why you’re so sad when it’s time to go back to your clubs

. you came to an agreement with central cordoba to go back and work for them during the argentine league

. then coming back to the national team when it called

. so you can’t wait for next season

#reader insert #football imagine #football team x reader #platonic football team x reader #argentina national football team #argentina national team #argentina nt x reader #female reader #argentina nt fic #lionel messi #julian alvarez #enzo fernandez #alejandro garnacho #nahuel molina #rodrigo de paul #all platonic

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ilexdiapason · 10 months

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(part one here)

Martyn, as it turns out, only has three phone numbers memorised.

One of them is his own. The second is his mother’s, which he tries, and receives the unfortunate information that the number has been disconnected and leads nowhere.

He finally has some luck with the third, the landline phone number of his house - while nobody picks this up, either, it does connect to somewhere at least. Martyn is able to leave a voicemail explaining that he’s out of the situation he was in that meant he couldn’t come home, and that he’ll be there by tonight.

“Where’s there?” Oli asks, kind of hoping Martyn won’t need a lift to Bristol or anything out of the way like that.

“Nottingham,” Martyn replies, guarded.

Oh - that’s not so bad, then. “I can give you a lift down, if you need?”

“Aren’t you busy?”

“Oh, no.” Oli’s remote working today; as long as he keeps an eye on his emails, nobody should even notice he’s gone, and if he can always call in a family emergency if Martyn does take him up on the offer to drive. It is a family emergency, after all, it seems - just not Oli’s family.

Martyn perks up at the response, though. “Oh, I getcha. Job market, eh?” He makes a cutting motion across his throat, with noise to match.

“No, I’ve got a job! A pretty good one, actually. That’s why I can afford living on my own.”

“Ah.” A silence, and then Martyn flicks the phone back on in his hands. “Oh, god. December 2023?”

“... Yes?” Why did you not know what month it was? Or, from the sounds of it, what year?

“God, my mum’s gonna be out of her wits, that’s awful.” He flicks at the screen - then, sheepish, asks, “What’s your passcode?”

“Here, I’ll -” Oli takes it out of his hands, taps in the shape of a circle “- what d’you want?”

“Oh, I was just gonna google myself.”

Oli pulls up Google. Waits, expectantly.

“Er - Martyn Littlewood.”

And oh, jesus, yeah, that’s a missing persons case. Last seen April 2021, no wonder he was bloody worried about the year, suspect investigated but no proof identified, case well and truly cold.

Martyn must see it in his face the way he’s started, because he grimaces. “That bad?”

“About what you’d expect,” says Oli, turning the phone around to face Martyn. He snatches it, which is unexpected but honestly not out of character for the stuff he remembers from Martyn in-game.

Wait.

“Hold on - how were you getting on SMPs with us lot if you were… whatever you were?”

Martyn grimaces harder. “Long story. Difficult, too. Let’s just say there’s a lotta people who I last saw lunging for my neck, and they’re not gonna stop because I’m here.”

“Are you a wanted man? Do I need to barricade the doors, close the blinds, what?”

“Nah, nah - just keep me away from your computer.” He pauses again to consider that. “Actually. If you’re here, does that mean everyone else is too?”

“What, the other people on the server? Well, they’re not here, but I could message people if you want, say you’ve… I don’t know, turned up at Sainsbury’s?”

“I’m an ASDA man myself,” Martyn cracks, and then frowns at the screen. “So can I go on your Discord? I won’t send anything. I just want to know.”

“Erm - sure.”

He taps through, immediately lights up. “Scott!”

Ah, yeah, he had been DMing Scott this morning. Something about axolotls, if he’s not mistaken. “Yeah! He’s all the way in Brighton, though, I don’t know if I could swing that much of a lift.”

“And Bek. And Eloise, and - oh my god, I need to know what Sausage’s real name is.”

“I’ve never asked.”

“You just call him Sausage, all the time?”

“S’funny, innit?”

Martyn nods solemnly. “It is funny.”

He sits like that for a while, scrolling through Oli’s DM history, muttering names under his breath. “I mean,” says Oli, “we can add you, if you like.”

“God. Yeah, you prob’ly can. Let me try it.”

A few seconds later, and Martyn’s handing back the phone to Oli with a pending friend request to InTheLittleWood in tow. “Don’t know why you didn’t offer that before, if you’re so excited.”

“Couldn’t,” Martyn says nonchalantly.

“Right, and does that have something to do with this missing persons case of yours?”

His face falls. “Yeah, actually. Something like that.”

“Ah.”

They decide to wait until either his mum calls Oli back or Oli is officially clocked out of work to get back in the car. Until then, it seems like it’s time for Oli to get Martyn up to speed on the last… two and a half years, good lord, that’s a while…

(part three here)

#ilexworks #reverse isekai au #itlwlore #martyn itlw #oli theorionsound #pirates smp #scurvyblr #vtuber martyn

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bringbacktentoo · 1 year

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“Rose is actually happy in a parallel universe with a half-human Doctor.” - Russell T. Davies

Hello, Whovians — we’re excited to announce the #BringBackTentoo movement!

Sign the petition

In July 2008, millions of viewers tuned in to watch ‘Journey’s End’; where the Doctor and Rose were left hand-in-hand on Bad Wolf Bay.

While fandom has remained active, continuing to generate endless works inspired by this iconic pairing, there's sadly been little official content from the people who launched the ship!

Nonetheless, our devotion remains unwavering. We persist, loving the OTP; ceaselessly spreading love and fan-made content worldwide!

The purpose of this movement is to show there is still an audience that is very interested in revisiting these two. One that would love to see the Doctor and Rose together again, on-screen or off, living their best lives in Pete’s World.

Regardless of whether it’s a spin-off, comics, audio adventures, or — and this, we believe, is crucial — anything at all, we would just love to have them back in some way. We’ve realized that perhaps there hasn’t been enough collective buzz to bring this into reality, which is why we’re looking to rally up as much support as we can.

Already with us? Sign the petition! Our petition will be emailed directly to the powers that be; including Russell T Davies, Big Finish, the BBC, and more.

Have questions? Doubts? Need a little more convincing? Then read on…

Why now?

Because there’s never been a more perfect time for it.

Already, Russell’s return has been bringing former fans back in droves. Everyone’s waiting with bated breath for RTD2 and the sixtieth anniversary; plus Ncuti, David, and Catherine. With so many fans dipping back into the Doctor Who world, why not strike while the iron’s hot?

At the fifteen-year mark, it might never be this “hot” again!

Plus… nostalgia is a massive market.

A return of Tentoo and Rose after all of these years would be the perfect cherry on top of all of it: closure for so many fans, as well as validation for the only happy ending a Doctor-and-companion pairing ever got in Doctor Who.

And don’t forget — fan campaigns work, especially in the social media age!

A spin-off — too much?

As much as we’d love to see David and Billie back on-screen together as the proper Meta-Crisis Doctor and Rose, we understand that we already have David coming back in a big way, as well as Ncuti Gatwa — our brand new Doctor. It’s a big, BIG ask, trying to get a spin-off out of this. We recognize that.

However, as famished fans who are living off of little more than canonical crumbs and dreams, we will greedily devour anything we can get.

Such as:

More Big Finish audio adventures

Big Finish has done incredible work for Doctor Who, including one of the only official ‘glimpses’ we’ve gotten into Pete’s World: A couple of short audios featuring Tentoo and Jackie.

Big Finish understands and respects these characters, their relationships, and the overall source material. They’ve shown time and time again that they’re more than capable of doing justice to Doctor Who!

Audio adventures with a focus on the Meta-Crisis Doctor and Rose Tyler would be fantastic. Anything from their adventures with Torchwood and/or UNIT, imaginings of their life with a TARDIS, etc — there are endless possibilities!

Comic book adventures

In 2021, Titan Comics published ‘Empire of the Wolf’, a lovely comic book that gifted us with the best glimpse we’ve ever had into the lives of the Doctor and Rose in Pete’s World:

It was a beautiful, if brief imagining of these two (and includes their daughter), but even so, the vast majority of the story involves Rose being trapped with the Eighth and Eleventh Doctors. We only get a few pages of Tentoo.

Comics would be an excellent way to dive into the parallel world again!

Novels

There are loads of Doctor Who novels with amazing stories about Rose and the Tenth Doctor (like 'The Stone Rose' by Jacqueline Rayner). But, here's the thing: there's just one official novel that dives into the whole Metacrisis and Rose relationship... And guess what? Fans are really craving content that stays true to RTD and Julie Gardner's original vision for this couple.

The good news is, there are tons of talented writers out there who would jump at the chance to create legit Meta-Crisis stories, and some would even do it for free!

An animated series

We recognize that this would be a tremendous undertaking, but imagine: You can do incredible things with animation that aren’t possible with film. It would appeal to fans of all ages, and Billie and David have more than proven themselves to be excellent voice actors. There are all sorts of stories that could be created in this medium.

But let’s say we went with the first choice…

A spin-off/miniseries

RTD has been very vocal about his plans for spin-offs. Billie and David are willing, and it hasn’t been so long that the pairing has lost relevance… Although, in Doctor Who, does anything ever really lose relevance? The show is known for bringing back old characters. Enemies, companions… Doctors:

It’s obvious that David seems to have no issue with playing the Doctor. Furthermore, even Billie Piper has recently expressed interest in a spin-off!

In 2019, she told Doctor Who magazine:

“I would like to see a one-off dark comedy about Rose and the Doctor in the parallel universe”.

Then, even more recently in December 2022, she told Buzzfeed [on returning to Doctor Who]:

“If it was like four episodes all shot in London, then yeah, I’d be like a rat-up-a-drainpipe for that.”

Four episodes of Tentoo and Rose in London? What could be more perfect than that?

Wouldn’t a spin-off overshadow Ncuti Gatwa?

It doesn’t have to! If a spin-off were to happen, it wouldn’t necessarily have to happen immediately — it can happen after Ncuti has been established as the Doctor, and after RTD has re-established himself as showrunner. We’d just like for it to be part of the conversation, and let those in charge know that people are interested.

So… What about the people who didn’t like the ending?

Yes, there are some naysayers out there. People who refuse to acknowledge Tentoo’s legitimacy as the Doctor; others who refuse to believe that Rose could ever be truly happy with him, and vice versa.

This, sadly, is willful ignorance. Not only has Russell T. Davies, the man who wrote Journey’s End — who created Tentoo and Rose — confirmed that they're happy; the Doctor himself, David Tennant, will be the first person to tell you that those two are blissfully shagging their lives away at all times. And god bless him for it.

We’ve come to find that a lot of people who aren’t on board with the ending just didn’t understand it, which is fine — what better way to understand this pairing than by seeing more of them?

On that note…

How can I help?

Sign the petition!

Petitions are old school, but they are proven to be effective at affecting change, even in today’s world. We can preach to the ends of the earth about how much we want to bring these two back, but without numbers to back it up, the prospect is null and void.

Don’t just like this post — please reblog!

This is a grassroots effort that is counting on the power of fans to help spread the word. Unlike most social media platforms, there is no algorithm on Tumblr. Likes do nothing for visibility, so please reblog to make sure as many people see this as possible!

Participate in Tentoo x Rose Month

This is a multi-medium fan event for creating content of the OTP throughout all of July! All works will be featured on the @tentoorosemonth2023 page, with certain works even shared on the BringBackTentoo Instagram.

Buy the already-existing content

If you haven’t already, buy the ‘Empire of the Wolf’ comic. Buy the Big Finish audios ‘The Siege of Big Ben’ and ‘Flight Into Hull!’. Show these fantastic creators that we will gladly consume any content about these two that we can get!

Spread the word

Know anyone who likes Doctor Who? Any former fandom friends who might’ve outgrown all of this, but would enjoy more Tentoo/Rose content? Or maybe even just a random IRL friend who supports your obsessions? Link them to the petition!

Join the movement by following this page and our Instagram (which is brand new, give it time to grow ♥️). Keep on creating content, using #BringBackTentoo to tag any of your fanart, well-wishes, or whatever you like across platforms — just please be sure to keep it positive!

Feel free to DM/ask if you have any other questions, concerns, or ideas that weren’t touched upon in this post.

And please, for goodness' sake, be kind. This is a labor of love inspired by passionate fans and creators who just want to see our OTP again. ♥️

#bringbacktentoo #doctor who #tentoo x rose #tentoo #rose tyler #metacrisis doctor #pete's world #rtd era #tenth doctor #tenrose #ten x rose #timepetals #doctor x rose #journey's end #big finish #titan comics #empire of the wolf

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callmewrinkles3 · 1 year

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Deuxmoi, July 2018 - June 2022

July 2018

Name: How He Gets The Girl

Email: [email protected]

Subject: He’s got the girl

Message: A F1 playboy is settling down! Spotted him and a brunette he’s been photographed a few times with at night two of the Reputation Tour in Philly. She knew all the lyrics and he was watching her with the biggest grin. It nearly looked like she was singing Dress to him, and he couldn’t help making out with her in public. They’re super cute, I hope they’re happy together!

March 2019

This former energy drink playboy has settled down. Rumours spread last year that the jet setting athlete had stopped accepting phone numbers from girls in bars, but at his home race last week his entire family were seen hugging a brunette. His parents in particular stayed close through the weekend, is it actually serious?

March 2020

Name: Megane

Email: [email protected]

Subject: Disgustingly cute

Message: All the stuff about this f1 driver being a playboy is crap. He and his girlfriend are adorable together, but she does work with him. Back in 2019 Ive seen her stop influential people from interrupting. They balance each other out, it’s pretty cute. Plus she remembers birthdays and special occasions

July 2021

Sunday Spotted: a f1 driver who wouldn’t give his exact relationship status was spotted getting out of the car at his hotel with his “best friend” on his lap. They were very cosy at dinner, and left to go back to a hotel room together.

A certain f1 long term bachelor is off the market. Seen out for dinner multiple times with someone he’s constantly photographed with, they shared smooches over dinner in LA last week before going to a concert at the Hollywood Bowl, where multiple sources saw them slow dancing together. According to those in the know they’ve been together for years, and friends expect a wedding announcement soon.

June 2022

Spotted: The breakup rumours are DEFINITELY not true. Just saw Daniel Ricciardo, his girlfriend, and his niece and nephew in Perth Zoo. She looks like she’s been pretty sick poor thing, but she had one of the kids curled into her as they ate lunch. No photos cause of the kids!

#call it what you want fic #ciwyw media #daniel ricciardo imagine #daniel ricciardo oneshot #daniel ricciardo fanfic #daniel ricciardo fic #f1 oneshot #f1 fanfic #f1 imagine #formula one imagine #formula one oneshot #formula one fanfic #formula 1 imagine #formula 1 fanfic #formula 1 oneshot

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anbuselvi1 · 1 year

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10+ Best Email Marketing Software For 2023 (Comparison)

The best email marketing software – summary Here is a quick summary of each of platform: TL;DR: Moosend – Best email marketing service overall. MailerLite – Best budget platform. Free plan available. Drip – Best email automation software. Omnisend – Best all-in-one automation solution for ecommerce. Includes email, SMS, and web push notifications. ConvertKit – Best email marketing platform…

View On WordPress

#best email marketing #best email marketing platform #best email marketing software #best email marketing software 2020 #best email marketing software 2021 #best email marketing software 2022 #best email marketing tool #email marketing #email marketing for beginners #email marketing platform #email marketing services #email marketing software #email marketing tools #email marketing tutorial #free email marketing software

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foxes-that-run · 1 month

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When did the 1975 work with Jack Antonoff

The time period that The 1975 worked with Jack is incorrectly reported as the whole period their record was being made, but the band have said to many outlets they weren't happy with it in 2021, when they also worked with a different producer.

Jack was brought on and the record was entirely recorded in 2022, between 5 January - 14 February 2022, including time they were in Real World Studios in the UK (so probably still before Jack came on) The record was also recorded to be played live and Jack did not write lyrics which would cut his time and costs.

Being Funny in a Foreign Language (BFIAFL)

12 January 2021 - The 1975 announced they "are currently making a new album" and will not tour in 2021

2021 - the 1975 worked with BJ Burton and created Demos, including 2 tracks and likely the lyrics of the record.

5 January 2022 - The 1975 share 2x 1 minute videos shot in Real World Studios in the UK. Titled Day 1/Day 2. They did work in Electric Lady Studios with Jack so this was likely still before they worked together.

14 February 2022 - the 1975 wipe socials to start new album cycle. the Bands manager indicated he had heard the record.

14 June 2022 - Part of the Band announced as lead single, the album was announced in July with full artwork, marketing and vinyl artwork complete indicating the recording and tracklist had been completed for some time.

To NME in 2022:

“We spent the whole of 2021 trying to figure out what [the new album] was. It wasn’t as obvious as it seemed by the time we got to the beginning of this year and made the record. We tried loads of different things. [...] Beabadoobee [released July 2022] was making a record and Jack Antonoff was maybe going to do it,” he said. “So that’s when me and Jack Antonoff started talking about that.

From the New Yorker in 2023:

In 2021, though, they hit a wall. [...] “We found it hard to get anything done musically [...]” Then they brought in Antonoff... [...]

From Pitchfork in 2022:

Though Being Funny, which was recorded this year, [...] For a few months across 2021, Healy and Daniel had writing sessions with BJ Burton, [...] By all accounts, the sessions were difficult. Over email, Burton explains that Healy and Daniel “work really differently” from him. “They’re always pulling up songs from Spotify, or checking another reference for a chord progression. I wanted to help change that, I guess,” he says. “There were moments, sparks where songs were being bred, but ultimately we made a bunch of early demos.” When he learned that Healy and Daniel also started talking to Jack Antonoff, the most in-demand pop-rock producer on the planet, Burton lost all motivation and bowed out. “It was a huge blow to my confidence when they met with Jack,” he admits. “It still stings, honestly.” [...] “Everything the 1975 does, I write.” Healy laughs softly. “No one touches the lyrics.”

Midnights

There are great Midnights timelines, I have referred to this one. It is widely known that it was started in LA in March 2021:

From March 2021 High Infidelity, WCS, The Great War, Hits Different, Vigilante Shit, Question...?, Maroon, Anti-Hero, You're on Your Own Kid, Midnight Rain, Glitch, Bejeweled, Labyrinth, Mastermind, Paris, and Dear Reader and You're Losing Me were written in 2021, all before Jack worked with the 1975.

Taylor was not seen from November 2021 - February 2022, then seen in a studio in Brooklyn, and at the Oscars in LA with Joe March 2022. She was not seen at Electric Lady Studios.

By April 2022 (none are confirmed) however specutated are: Lavender Haze, Sweet Nothing, BTTWS, SNOTB and Karma complete by April. Taylor hinted at the album title and lyrics no later than May indicating the tracklisting was likely complete.

By June Taylor was hinting at TTPD so had moved onto it

#The 1975 #Midnights #Taylor Swift

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banananutsmuthie · 2 years

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Idol Club Shareholder Letter

Word Count: 2.2k+ words

A/N: NOT SMUT. This is Idol Club lore written in the form of a shareholder letter. I promise you'll be rewarded with a bunch of easter eggs and future Idol Club spoilers if you read the whole thing. Enjoy while I prepare a proper comeback soon!

My fellow shareholders,

I was there on Opening Day next to Founder Kim as the VP of Public Relations when we officially opened the doors to our maiden Idol Club branch in Gangnam. Since then, I’ve risen through the ranks at Idol Club Entertainment, serving as the Chief Communications Officer for the last eight months. I’ve given many speeches on behalf of this company, addressed our employees through countless emails, and weathered the storm of numerous media queries during the Aberration scandal. Yet, never could I have imagined addressing you all in this annual shareholder letter, a job usually reserved for Founder Kim who has served as chairman since day one.

Founder Kim has been a pioneer and visionary in leading this company into the next golden age of technology and entertainment, so it came as a shock to receive Founder Kim’s resignation from the company last month. We wish Founder Kim all the best.

Rest assured, as the newly elected chairman of Idol Club Entertainment, I will do everything in my power to continue to steer this ship in the right direction, staying true to Founder Kim’s original vision while maintaining the best interests of our stakeholders.

That said, the transition in leadership could not have come at a worse time. These are murky and uncertain waters, and I’ve been tasked with guiding us through a global economic crisis, war, a chip shortage, and rising inflation across the world.

But we remain resilient.

2022 has shown us that as the world slowly emerges out of the pandemic and we find our cadence to the “new normal”, our customers are flocking to Idol Club for things they lacked in 2020 and 2021: social interactions, intimacy without consequence, and a damn good time.

And our numbers support that. Even though we temporarily lost the licensing rights to Everglow’s Yiren (one of our highest-rated and popular models) due to her sudden hiatus, we saw our profits soar to unimaginable heights in 2022, bringing a 403% increase in profits compared to 2021! This could not have been possible without all the strides we’ve made across all sectors of our business. From our engineers to the hosts at the front lines and even all the way down to our sanitation specialists, each one of our employees has helped us deliver an exceptional product and live up to our slogan to “make dreams a reality”.

Differentiators in 2022

But profits aren’t the only thing to smile about as we close out the fiscal year: reviews and ratings are up not just for the company, but also across all of our android models, finishing the year with an average rating of 4.92 out of 5 stars, up from 4.89 in 2021. We also received the prestigious Club of the Year award for the third year in a row. There were also a couple of huge accomplishments we achieved this year which helped differentiate our brand from our competitors:

Idol Club Goes International

Earlier this year, we launched our first Idol Club branch overseas in the heart of Singapore’s red light district, which has outperformed initial profit estimates by 32%. Customers are flocking to the affluent city-state in Southeast Asia and have helped us carve out a hearty 60% market share in Singapore’s escort sector. I’d like to thank the local government, our staff, and our external risk assessment vendor for making this all possible.

This is just the beginning. As part of Idol Club Entertainment’s five year plan, we are looking into entering the three largest markets in the world: China, Japan, and the United States. This is not an easy task, however. Each market has its own local laws and regulations that inhibit our current business model. We’ve hired local teams in these markets working around the clock with the hope that we can eventually enter these markets in a viable and legal way.

JYP Entertainment Signs Exclusive Idol Club Contract

I am proud to announce that after months of negotiation, we were able to land our biggest client to date in JYP Entertainment Corp (JYPE, KOSDAQ: 035900). This brings aboard TWICE, by far the most requested group by our customers, to the Idol Club family in addition to other JYPE girl groups like ITZY and select members of NMIXX and NiziU. This exclusive contract helps to diversify the products and services offered by the Idol Club brand as well as keep us ahead of our competitors.

It has only been a few months since we onboarded JYPE to our family of companies, but our Chaeyoung and Nayeon models have already been wildly successful at our Idol Zoo subsidiary, accounting for nearly 36% of all 2022 sales in just Q3 alone. Our plan is to introduce our Tzuyu models at our Singapore branch in early Q1, followed by the rest of the JYPE idols spread across our various brands. This further cements our commitment to providing our customers with the largest catalog of idols in the adult idol entertainment industry, joining our already star-studded premium lineup featuring BLACKPINK, Red Velvet, and aespa.

First Subsidiary Idol Zoo Launches

Expansion of our Idol Club flagship branch successfully completed in Q1 this year, introducing Idol Zoo, our first subsidiary, to the family of companies. This has led to numerous opportunities for brand exposure to the public.

Currently, Idol Zoo houses numerous ‘exhibits’ that our customers have access to, including free public shows known as the ‘Exhibitionist Exhibits’, such as the monthly Chaeyoungs show and the daily topless teasers. For the not-so-adventurous, we also offer private encounters for our paying customers. Among the exhibits our customers can peruse and enjoy: the Feline and Rodent display with the aforementioned Chaeyoungs; our popular Bunny Breeding Grounds featuring such idols as TWICE’s Nayeon, ex-IZ*ONE leader Kwon Eunbi, Kep1er’s Yujin, and Billlie’s Tsuki; and the Aquatic Animals Squirt Zone, featuring various idols who really know how to make a splash.

In 2023, we plan to further expand our exhibits, bringing in TWICE’s Mina to headline the new Penguin Habitat, as well as adding a new Screaming Deer Show to our line of Exhibitionist Exhibits featuring Oh My Girl’s Arin and NMIXX’s Sullyoon.

Endorsements from Idols

We’ve been fortunate this year to feature some surprise appearances from idols, both as clients and cameo performers, ranging from Weki Meki’s Choi Yoojung to ex-IZ*ONE’s Kang Hyewon, and many more who have preferred to not be named. And although this represents a tiny fraction of our sales, their endorsements and appearances at Idol Club have helped strengthen our brand reputation as the leader in adult idol entertainment. Their continued partnership undoubtedly will help us develop relationships with other labels not yet licensed to Idol Club Entertainment. These endorsements alone accounted for 12% of client referrals, not an insignificant number to our bottom line.

The Road Ahead

As we look ahead toward the next fiscal year, we are launching a bunch of new products and services that we hope will entice more customers and bring in new revenue. There are many great things to look forward to, but there’s also things we need to account for in our 2023 forecasts as well.

Generation 2 Androids

With our Gen 1 androids nearing the end of their lifecycle, we began replacing our fleet with the new Gen 2 androids at the start of Q4 this year, continuing the rollout into Q1 until we are 100% transitioned. Our engineers have made enhancements to the current hardware and completely revamped the software, providing customers with an even better sensual experience with the addition of reactive sweat glands and more realistic skin made with a polymer built in-house.

The software has been finely tuned to ensure a 0% chance of any Aberrations, but perhaps the most exciting development with these next-gen androids is the limitless options for customizations. The new models are modular, meaning each part of their body can be switched out quickly for different parts to create the customer’s ideal idol.

We plan to roll out the customizations in Q3 with an OTA update, allowing our customers to change the stock model androids to their heart’s desire: hair color, eye color, breast size, you name it. If they can dream it, we can build it.

More Product Offerings

As an entertainment company, we cannot be complacent with our current product offering. Customers will always seek out more thrills, and we must be ready to pivot and innovate when the tides change in order to meet the growing demands of our customers. We are exploring different ways to increase profits in 2023 by making our product more accessible to a wider audience without sacrificing the brand reputation and trust that Idol Club Entertainment has come to be known for.

In early Q1, we will be testing a weekly ‘lottery’ where one lucky winner will be chosen at random for a 1-hour session with any of our androids from our product lines in Tier 3 and below. Each ticket to the lottery will be sold at an affordable price yet to be determined, thus making it more accessible for customers who may not normally have access to Idol Club. Our research indicates there is an itch that needs to be scratched in this demographic, one that has not yet been tapped into by our competitors. If profitable, we plan to roll out the offering permanently, simultaneously introducing a secondary monthly lottery with a higher ticket price, with the winner given access to our premium Tier 4 and Tier 5 product lines.

For our current customers, we are rolling out a tiered subscription plan in Q2 that will work in tandem with our current on-demand pricing scheme. In total, there will be three different tiers, each offering unlimited visits to Idol Club for a specified time period: a week, a month, or a year. Each of the three tiers is broken down even further into a basic plan which allows access to Tier 3 and lower products, and a premium plan offered for an upcharge, allowing the customer access to our full line of androids across all product tiers.

A possible Idol Club Rewards program is also currently in the works. Though I have no further information at this time, our teams are working hard to roll out this program in Q4 of 2023.

Proposition 12

It would be irresponsible of me to end this letter and not mention Proposition 12 currently being voted on, and I’ve saved this issue for last because it is the biggest detriment to Founder Kim’s dream and affects every single employee and shareholder of Idol Club Entertainment. If Proposition 12 passes legislation, our successes from this past year and our roadmap for next year will be all for naught. Proponents of Proposition 12 want the general public to believe that our androids are sentient, that they should be afforded the same rights as human beings, thus making Idol Club operations illegal under current South Korean laws. Meanwhile, other proponents argue androids should be shut down entirely because they are dangerous, citing the Aberration scandal.

I want to assure our shareholders that these arguments hold no merit. We’ve hired an external research team that has concluded that while our androids are best in class, they are not sentient. Their findings also concluded that there was no evidence of remaining Aberrations. We continue to deliver a sound product; our engineering teams worked tirelessly to quickly rectify the bugs shortly after news of the Aberration scandal first broke. Still, the possibility looms that Proposition 12 proponents could sway public opinion enough to make it the law of the land.

I want to thank our legal team and lobbyists who have fought for us to make sure that Idol Club Entertainment stays in business. However, it will ultimately fall into the hands of the voters, so I am asking our shareholders to be proactive and vote ‘No’ on Proposition 12 in this upcoming election. Tell your family. Tell your friends. Together, we can make sure Idol Club continues to operate.

In the event that Proposition 12 passes, we have contingencies in place to make sure Idol Club Entertainment continues to operate in some capacity, and we are also exploring other sectors to further strengthen our current contingency plans. These plans aren’t 100% fool-proof, which is why I cannot stress enough just how important voting against Proposition 12 is.

Closing Statement

Idol Club Entertainment started from just an idea from Founder Kim, an idea that sprouted into a dream, and a dream that blossomed into a reality. There’s a storm brewing in the form of Proposition 12 that threatens our budding business, but all storms pass, and from the clouds emerges the sunlight. We will weather this storm, and when the clouds clear, we will prevail.

I would like to thank all of our shareholders for continuing to believe in us enough to invest in our product. I look forward to serving as your new chairman for the foreseeable future and hope to make Founder Kim proud. And as always, I will continue to operate this company with our core value in mind, the same core value that Founder Kim used as the foundation for Idol Club Entertainment, and the same one that continues to drive our company to be the best in the world:

“The customer always comes first, and the customer always comes.”

Regards,

Chairman Choi

#idol club #lore #non-smut #bns spoilers #bns easter eggs

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mostlysignssomeportents · 4 months

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The Bezzle excerpt (Part II)

I'm on tour with my new novel The Bezzle! Catch me next in SALT LAKE CITY (Feb 21, Weller Book Works) and SAN DIEGO (Feb 22, Mysterious Galaxy). After that, it's LA, Seattle, Portland, Phoenix and more!

Today, I'm bringing you part two of this week's serialized excerpt from The Bezzle, my new Martin Hench high-tech crime revenge thriller:

https://us.macmillan.com/books/9781250865878/thebezzle

Though most of the scams that Hench – a two-fisted forensic accountant specializing in Silicon Valley skullduggery – goes after in The Bezzle have a strong tech component, this excerpt concerns a pre-digital scam: music royalty theft.

This is a subject that I got really deep into when researching and writing 2022's Chokepoint Capitalism – a manifesto for fixing creative labor markets:

https://chokepointcapitalism.com/

My co-author on that book is Rebecca Giblin, who also happens to be one of the world's leading experts in "copyright termination" – the legal right of creative workers to claw back any rights they signed over after 35 years:

https://pluralistic.net/2021/09/26/take-it-back/

This was enshrined in the 1976 Copyright Act, and has largely languished in obscurity since then, though recent years have seen creators of all kinds getting their rights back through termination – the authors of The Babysitters Club and Sweet Valley High Books, Stephen King, and George Clinton, to name a few. The estates of the core team at Marvel Comics, including Stan Lee, just settled a case that might have let them take the rights to all those characters back from Disney:

https://www.thewrap.com/marvel-settles-spiderman-lawsuit-steve-ditko/

Copyright termination is a powerful tonic to the bargaining disparities between creative workers. A creative worker who signs a bad contract at the start of their career can – if they choose – tear that contract up 35 years later and demand a better one.

Turning this into a plot-point in The Bezzle is the kind of thing that I love about this series – the ability to take important, obscure, technical aspects of how the world works and turn them into high-stakes technothriller storylines that bring them to the audience they deserve.

If you signed something away 35 years ago and you want to get it back, try Rights Back, an automated termination of tranfer tool co-developed by Creative Commons and Authors Alliance (whose advisory board I volunteer on):

https://rightsback.org/

All right, onto today's installment. Here's part one, published on Saturday:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/02/17/the-steve-soul-caper/#lead-singer-disease

It was on one of those drives where Stefon learned about copyright termination. It was 2011, and NPR was doing a story on the 1976 Copyright Act, passed the same year that was on the bottom of the document Chuy forged.

Under the ’76 act, artists acquired a “termination right”— that is, the power to cancel any copyright assignment after thirty-five years, even if they signed a contract promising to sign away their rights forever and a day (or until the copyright ran out, which was nearly the same thing).

Listening to a smart, assured lady law professor from UC Berkeley explaining how this termination thing worked, Stefon got a wild idea. He pulled over and found a stub of a pencil and the back of a parking-ticket envelope and wrote down the professor’s name when it was repeated at the end of the program. The next day he went to the Inglewood Public Library and got a reference librarian to teach him how to look up a UC Berkeley email address and he sent an email to the professor asking how he could terminate his copyright assignment.

He was pretty sure she wasn’t going to answer him, but she did, in less than a day. He got the email on his son’s smartphone and the boy helped him send a reply asking if he could call her. One thing led to another and two weeks later, he’d filed the paperwork with the U.S. Copyright Office, along with a check for one hundred dollars.

Time passed, and Stefon mostly forgot about his paperwork adventure with the Copyright Office, though every now and again he’d remember, think about that hundred dollars, and shake his head. Then, nearly a year later, there it was, in his mailbox: a letter saying that his copyright assignment had been canceled and his copyrights were his again. There was also a copy of a letter that had been sent to Chuy, explaining the same thing.

Stefon knew a lawyer—well, almost a lawyer, an ex–trumpet player who became a paralegal after one time subbing for Sly Stone’s usual guy, and then never getting another gig that good. He invited Jamal over for dinner and cooked his best pot roast and served it with good whiskey and then Jamal agreed to send a letter to Inglewood Jams, informing them that Chuy no longer controlled his copyrights and they had to deal with him direct from now on.

Stefon hand-delivered the letter the next day, wearing his good suit for reasons he couldn’t explain. The receptionist took it without a blink. He waited.

“Thank you,” she said, pointedly, glancing at the door.

“I can wait,” he said.

“For what?” She reminded him of his boy’s girlfriend, a sophomore a year younger than him. Both women projected a fierce message that they were done with everyone’s shit, especially shit from men, especially old men. He chose his words carefully.

“I don’t know, honestly.” He smiled shyly. He was a good-looking man, still. That smile had once beamed out of televisions all over America, from the Soul Train stage. “But ma’am, begging your pardon, that letter is about my music, which you all sell here. You sell a lot of it, and I want to talk that over with whoever is in charge of that business.”

She let down her guard by one minute increment. “You’ll want Mr. Gounder,” she said. “He’s not in today. Give me your phone number, I’ll have him call.”

He did, but Mr. Gounder didn’t call. He called back two days later, and the day after that, and the following Monday, and then he went back to the office. The receptionist who reminded him of his son’s girlfriend gave him a shocked look.

“Hello,” he said, and tried out that shy smile. “I wonder if I might see that Mr. Gounder.”

She grew visibly uncomfortable. “Mr. Gounder isn’t in today,” she lied. “I see,” he said. “Will he be in tomorrow?”

“No,” she said.

“The day after?”

“No.” Softer.

“Is that Mr. Gounder of yours ever coming in?”

She sighed. “Mr. Gounder doesn’t want to speak with you, I’m sorry.”

The smile hadn’t worked, so he switched to the look he used to give his bandmates when they wouldn’t cooperate. “Maybe someone can tell me why?”

A door behind her had been open a crack; now it swung wide and a young man came out. He looked Hispanic, with a sharp fade and flashy sneakers, but he didn’t talk like a club kid or a hood rat—he sounded like a USC law student.

“Sir, if you have a claim you’d like Mr. Gounder to engage with, please have your attorney contact him directly.”

Stefon looked this kid up and down and up, tried and failed to catch the receptionist’s eye, and said, “Maybe I can talk this over with you. Are you someone in charge around here?”

“I’m Xavier Perez. I’m vice president for catalog development here. I don’t deal with legal claims, though. That’s strictly Mr. Gounder’s job. Please have your attorney put your query in writing and Mr. Gounder will be in touch as soon as is feasible.”

“I did have a lawyer write him a letter,” Stefon said. “I gave it to this young woman. Mr. Gounder hasn’t been in touch.”

Perez looked at the receptionist. “Did you receive a letter from this gentleman?”

She nodded, still not meeting Stefon’s eye. “I gave it to Mr. Gounder last week.”

Perez grinned, showing a gold tooth, and then, in his white, white voice, said, “There you have it. I’m sure Mr. Gounder will get back in touch with your counsel soon. Thank you for coming in today, Mr.—”

“Stefon Magner.” Stefon waited a moment, then said, for the first time in many years, “I used to perform under Steve Soul, though.”

Perez nodded briskly. He’d known that. “Nice to meet you, Mr. Magner.” Without waiting for a reply, he disappeared back into his office.

ETA: Here's part three!

If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/02/19/crad-kilodney-was-an-outlier/#copyright-termination

#pluralistic #the bezzle #martin hench #marty hench #red team blues #fiction #crime fiction #crime thrillers #thrillers #technothrillers #novels #books #royalties #wage theft #creative labor

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roo-bastmoon · 9 months

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Remembering Nana today...

Interestingly enough, it was my 93-year-old grandmother who sort of led me to BTS. Today is the second anniversary of her passing, and my rambles about that are under the cut.

So, just to give you a visual: my Nana was a lot like Rose from the Golden Girls but, like, not in any way a ditz. She was a very practical Capricorn, but she looked and spoke a lot like Betty White from that show.

Nana practically raised me. I spent literally every weekend with her, from the day I was born until my parents divorced and we moved away when I was 13. Every Friday, my folks would drop me off at her apartment, and she'd make me homemade mac and cheese for dinner and vanilla ice cream for dessert (I did NOT like to try new things). Then we'd watch Full House, Perfect Strangers, Golden Girls, and Empty Nest on TGIF. After that, it would be bath time and bed.

Fun side note: I was an extremely independent and stubborn only child. So I always insisted on bathing myself. Not wanting me to drown on her watch, Nana would sit in the bathroom with me and read me poetry while I played with my Tub Town toys. But the poetry would always be the most macabre stuff--like The Spider and the Fly, or The Wreck of the Hesperus. I am not saying I was scarred for life by this, but I'm also not saying I'm normal, either.

Anyway, those were our Friday nights. On Saturdays we'd get up at the crack of dawn to go flea marketing with her two younger sisters. She would give me $1 to spend on my "trashy treasures" -- but it was the 80s, so I could make it stretch. After that, we'd all go to a buffet lunch. Then she'd take me in the afternoons to the local library, where I would pick my books for the week.

Another side note: My parents were not big on buying toys, but I could have any books I wanted. As a young kid, I used to take a flashlight and hide in the bathtub at night so I could read past bedtime. I figured I was being super sneaky because they couldn't see the light coming from that room. But we lived in a tiny house with only one bathroom, so of COURSE they knew. Mom told me years later that they thought it was funny I was being rebellious by secretly reading YA novels in the bathroom when I was in elementary school. Nana, of course, let me stay up as late as I wanted to read. I digress.

As the years passed, even when I went out of state and the country for school, or moved across America to take jobs, Nana and I emailed every day, called once a week, kept in constant touch. When I moved back to my home state 13 years ago, I sort of became her caregiver and weekend companion.

This time it was my turn on the weekends to make her food, take her shopping, drive her around, get her books from the bookmobile. She raised me, and then for 10 years, I took care of her.

I loved my Nana. She was funny and soft-hearted and well read, but she grew up *dirt poor* and never got to see the world except through books and the TV, so she was always very humble and a bit shy. She loved me so much--she was the only person in the world who would listen to me drivel on about anything, and still be interested.

At 93-years-old, she died of a sudden heart attack on August 30, 2021. Emergency personnel were with her in her apartment, so she wasn't alone or in pain very long, but I couldn't get to her fast enough to say goodbye. Mom and I identified her later, at the hospital.

I am grateful she had a long life, and didn't suffer, and wasn't alone. But my family is very, very small. Just Nana and Mom and me. And after the whirlwind of taking care of her funeral and packing up her apartment and donating everything, suddenly there was just all this free time--these empty hours I usually filled taking care of Nana.

I just was so lost.

I started trying to read, or quilt, or watch movies. I got into some K dramas for a bit. Nothing really interested me. Then I started watching dance compilations on YouTube before bed.

And one snowy December night, I found a Steezy video where Brian Puspos was reviewing Jimin's dance style. I had no idea what it was. It was like this weird impulse--as if someone moved my finger to hover over and click that video...

You cannot imagine how every nerve-ending woke up. My brain suddenly came online. (I was a semi-pro ballet dancer as a kid, and I knew the absolute second I saw Jimin that he was a master who trained relentlessly--nobody had to point it out to me.)

For the first time in months, I FELT something other than grief.

I watched every single video of him I could. I had no idea who BTS were, didn't know anything about Kpop. But eventually I found more videos, I listened to their songs, and later I discovered Jikook, and I made online accounts and I watched RUN episodes, and I got to go see Yoongi as my first-ever concert, and now I'm making my way through In the Soop and Bon Voyage.

In fact, pretty much every day since I discovered Jimin, I've been thinking about, learning about, and trying to support Jimin and the people Jimin loves.

Jimin and BTS got me through the grief at losing the person I loved most in the world. They saw me through uterine cancer, and the surgeries, and mourning the fact that I can never be a bio mom now. They got me through the medical tests and the chronic fatigue and pain I've had for the last 4 months.

I really love our boys. I may not understand or love everything about them or their company or their industry, but loving someone doesn't mean thinking of them as demi-gods; it means being loyal even as they grow past any flaws.

To be honest, I feel like I owe Jimin my life, in a way. I was in a really, really dark place a year and a half ago. Jimin was the only joy, the only reason to keep going (besides my mom and kitties, of course).

Now I own every digital release BTS has put out--the whole discography, even the skits. I try to vote on all the apps whenever I can, and stream on premium family bundle accounts for Spotify, YouTube, and Pandora; I also do free trials for Tidal and Qobuz. II've never done any of this stuff before, never been a fan of any musicians, but I really, truly do try to return the favor.

It's a bit hyperbolic to say they "saved me" because lots of people cope with grief and illness and loneliness and it doesn't mean they just throw in the towel.

But BTS helped me stop surviving, and made me want to really live.

Plus, even when I'm too sick to go out or call up my friends, I can always get on my phone and come here, to chat with my fandom friends. I don't know most of their real names or faces or anything about their real lives, but we all love BTS; we all talk about and work together for BTS.

Nana would have loved that. (She also would have let me talk her ear off every day about Jimin and Jikook and the Tannies because that was her love language.)

Is BTS a replacement for real, genuine human interaction? No. Of course not. It is, at the end of the day, a band. Not a life.

But it also feels like getting to know 7 people I'd be honored to be friends with, if we ever met. People I want to support so they can achieve all their dreams--because they always pay it forward, too.

I sometimes wonder if Nana guided my hand to click on that video that day. Maybe she was looking down at me and thought "Ah, this will be good for her. This will be healing."

Probably not, but still, I'd like to think that. I'd like to think it was Nana who led me to the Magic Shop.

I miss her. I love her. I still can hear her voice in my head every day.

But I'm gonna be okay. (The future's gonna be okay.)

There's still so much to look forward to and work to be done. Fighting!

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