#especially bc there’s a scene the guy got the girl pregnant and gave her a c section but she was drugged so she didn’t remember

[gladiatorcunt]

love watching a thriller and being like “this would be a fire coryo au”

[hes-writer]

I'm the anon who wrote about the reality-AU ask.

And I have a different view from what you wrote, because for me there where 2 major things:

1. Reader wasn't a strong woman

2. Harry was definitely an arrogant, selfish prick to reader.

I will start with 1.

So, what moral and values? I honestly don't understand that part because for me moral and values mean one thing and I don't see they fitting the situation.

Regardless, MC wasn't a strong woman for several reasons.

She allowed her pain get in the way of her child's life several times, she literally got with the first guy that showed her love when she wasn't ready nor emotionally stable, if we take in mind that she met him at halfway through her pregnancy and in 2 years ish she was already living with him and allowing her child to call him "dad". So she clinged to Connor as a substitute and staple to the family she had planned having with Harry, just like Harry clinged to Camille's offer as a way to have what he dreamed having with Y/N. None of them put their child's best interest first, otherwise she would have found a way to deal with her pain while allowing him to be part of Halo's life and he would have found a way to accept that he would never have what he wanted bc of his mistakes in the past.

And the clearest sign of that is her conversation with Harry in the last chapter. She did love Connor, but he was only there because Harry blocked her. If he hadn't, he'd have seen the text and be involved in his kids life. So, I know you said something about being emotionally available as a parent and that's my argument for that. Harry wasn't emotionally a dad bc that chance was taken from him out of spitefulness and he still tried to be there, he made a mistake but he never gave up. He was robbed of it countless times bc MC was never healed properly to let go of her personal feelings and focus on Halo, bc I can guarantee you that if given the chance, Halo would forget it and choose to have a relationship with Harry.

Which brings me to my previous point... He wasn't Halos dad, MC made him her dad because she didn't want to deal with Harry when she knew that he had a right to at least be informed about the baby, regardless of her relationship with him. In the story you make it known that he blocked her and that's how she couldn't tell him, but she kept in touch with his family + he contacted her at some point. So, she uses her own actions against him and he let's her out of guilty, showing a bit of manipulation from her side. Both of them were toxic and manipulative. Just bc you were hurt, doesn't give you a right to act as you please, speacially when a child is involved. That shouldn't even be put to argument and I'd have agreed with you more if you hadn't tried to classify MC as a victim at all costs, even when she was the wrong one.

If this was real life, a girl behaving like her would be concerning, so why in a fanfic she's considered strong? Because she standed up for herself and for her daughter? I mean, did she truly stand up for her child? Can we truly say that? Or did she allow her own barriers and insecurities surround them and keep Harry distant? Wouldn't a healed and strong woman be capable of dealing with her ex for their's daughter sake, speacially when she's in a happy and healthy relationship?

Parents are allowed mistakes. None of them know what they're doing and the greatest majority of the world is filled with people who weren't mature enough to be parents, yet somehow were allowed to.

She was unfair and subconsciously used her child to get back at Harry for all the pain he caused her.

He left her, so she didn't tell him about their baby, then when he found out she monopolised his entire relationship with his daughter and did some pretty illegal stuff, and when he committed his first mistake with the child she cut him off completely without taking in account what her daughter wanted.

Have you watched the show The Duchess on Netflix? I think its a great example of my point here, in case you don't understand it.

Also, forgot to say that she was toxic again when she kept threatening him over wanting to be with his kid. Like, we spend tons of times telling people to be responsible with their art, as it can be a door into introducing kids to things. We also spend a ton of time telling boys that they should care about their babies and be there for them. Then you come and write a fic where the guy gets threatened and manipulated when trying to be with his 🤷🏻‍♀️

MC definitely had her right to commit her own mistakes, as I said, parents will do it countless times. But I think that's a bit unfair that she gets as many as she wants bc she got hurt previous to baby being born, yet Harry barely gets one when trying to figure himself out after finding out about his kid. You mentioned that a judge would never give Harry any custody bc of what he did and that was a bit dumb, sorry. Law is based on justice, balance and protecting the victim with fairness and justice, therefore Harry would have been granted at least the benefit of the doubt as his mistakes were minor and the victim in this story is Halo, not MC✌🏽

This is a long one.

Morals and values are not fitting in the situation.

Morals are personal beliefs that a person upholds and values are something that are regarded as important. I think that everybody uses them in most of the things they do so they definitely fit the situation.

She literally got with the first guy that showed her love...

I wouldn’t say that MC clung unto Connor and got into a relationship with him right away. The first couple of instances—they were just friends and weren’t officially together until Reign.

None of them put their child’s best interest first // Reader wasn’t a strong woman

I agree that both parties didn’t act on the best interest of their child but that doesn’t necessarily mean that MC wasn’t a strong woman. Sure, she wasn’t ideal in the context of being a mother—but she mended herself enough to give Harry a chance when he found out, even setting up limits while she was at it.

Wouldn’t you think that that takes courage? Besides the preceding fact that it is courteous to tell someone that you’re having their baby (no argument there), especially to someone who has cheated and betrayed your trust, you are sweeping the pain away. MC was letting Harry back in even if she personally didn’t want to. Harry was a huge part of her life so I think reminiscing on their relationship would never cease; they have a kid together. All the good and bad of their time together will always be present in her mind.

Harry was robbed [of being a dad]

You think that Harry was robbed of being a Dad, I can’t convince you otherwise. You said it yourself though, ‘if Harry hadn’t blocked MC, he would’ve seen the text and he would’ve been a dad to Halo’.

But he did—and the following points of your argument are, in a sense, irrelevant because what you’re pointing out is what could’ve happened if Harry didn’t do what he did. These are the consequences of his actions. “He blearily remembered bitterly blocking her number just as she texted “I need to tell you something,” <- That scene was the turning point of MC’s decision and frankly, a showcase of Harry’s immaturity. MC said she had something to tell him and he retaliated by blocking her.

As well, you mention, ‘if given the chance, Halo would forget about it’—there’s a lot of assumptions in your argument because these aren’t part of the original story. These are what you think should’ve happened.

He blocked her [...] but she kept in touch with his family

MC kept in touch with his family on the pretext that they wouldn't inform harry that the baby was his. This was because of a misunderstanding due to a post on Camille's IG page. H seemed happy with his new relationship. MC didn't NOT tell him out of SPITE—it was because she didn't want to ruin his relationship with Camille.

Harry contacted her at some point // Just because you’re hurt doesn’t give you the right to act as you please

Yes, Harry did contact her—to call her a ‘whore’ and stated that she ‘probably slept around’ during their relationship. [ie. Harry: Why not? Scared that y’gonna have to admit that everything you put on was an act? How can y’move on so fast and give me shit about it?”] I’m guessing that’s probably not the best way for H to ask about MC’s pregnancy and I can imagine that the sheer rudeness and projection will deter most people.

His dialogues were an attack on her personality (that she was a liar and disloyal), on the validity of her emotions (that she was faking them), and on her identity as woman solely because he was crumbling under the truth that he was the one who messed up. I mentioned before that Harry’s insults were a projection as a result of his defence mechanism. Meaning that he was—to some extent—aware that MC hadn’t cheated but convinced himself otherwise to feel less guilty. Therefore, at the end of Halo, he judged the credibility of their child.

If this was real life...

And this is a fanfiction.

Once again, MC might not have been the ideal representation of a strong woman, but she stepped up when Halo was introduced.

Imagine going through a break-up with your SO of two years while you’re pregnant because he went behind your back FOR A YEAR, amidst hormonal changes, still going to work, and trying to find yourself when someone has taken so much of you—that’s traumatizing. Healing isn’t linear. Just because you’re wounded doesn’t mean that you’re not strong.

She was unfair and subconsciously used her child to get back at Harry

MC was honest but she wasn’t truthful. Her intentions were human nature yet keeping Halo away from Harry wasn’t very truthful of her—in legalities and such.

I don’t think MC monopolized H/H’s relationship. She gave Harry a chance to bond with Halo, and they did. As mentioned, MC had set limits and boundaries when discussing Harry’s presence in their daughters’ life. It was a legally binding, word-of-mouth, agreement that Harry assented to.

[he was] threatened and manipulated

In that sense, Harry’s hostility towards MC in Reign was threatening her decision to have him around [ie. You’re not something I would take the time to handle,” // You’re a goddamn mistake is what you are,’]

I understand your concern and I apologize for that. I’m not explicitly saying that this one piece of fiction is satirical in the sense that it’s the opposite of what society chants because that would be vile of me to do. Every circumstance is different though—it really is a choice of preference, validation and weighing out the subject matter.

You mentioned that a ‘judge would never give Harry custody’ and that was a bit dumb...

That line was never part of the story.

"Take it up legally if you'd like. Want to have a custody battle? Bring it on. Let's see whose side the judge is on after they find out that you cheated on me while I was pregnant with Halo."

Suggesting that the conclusion can be one of shared-custody wherein MC has more time with Halo (80/20 visitation schedule).

[kyliexc]

BUENAAAASSSSSSSSSS ! soy yo , mini from da 6ix , again . coming at you with my original kid . she’s changed just a bit , but still pretty much a god damn  M E S S .  and bad bunny’s vete came on shuffle soOoOooOoooOOOOOOOOOOOOO LEGGO !

chicago’s very own Kylie Castillo has been spotted on madison avenue driving a BMW X5 , welcome ! your resemblance to Becky G is unreal . according to tmz , you just had your twenty second birthday bash  . your chance of surviving new york is uncertain because you’re impulsive , but being loyal might help you . i think being a Aries explains that .  3 things that would paint  a  better picture of you would be a bottle of patron, late night partying and 20grams of weed . 

hit the mfng like button for plots bc I WILL mssge u or else

BASICS ! 

Full Name: kylie valentina castillo

Nickname(s): ky, kyky, k, kybby

Age: 22

Height: 5 ft

Date of Birth: April 15th 1997

Zodiac sign: aries

Hogwarts house: slythindor (slytherin + gryffindor)

Ethnicity: mexican

Nationality: american

Gender: cis female

Pronouns: she/her

Orientation: bisexual

Religion: agnostic-catholic

Tattoos: a peach on her ass, #2 tramp stamp and canon becky g tattoos

Language(s) Spoken: english + spanish

Accent: american with a hint of spanish

BACK STORY ! 

kylie castillo is the third born child from alejandro and lupe castillo ! alejandro was a renowned soccer player from jalisco, mexico . he played for the mexican national team AND for Barcelona FC . lupe castillo is also from jalisco , mexico , but she attended school in spain where she began as a seamstress for a small vintage boutique before going off on her own to start her own exclusive brand that made it big - as in , only those who could really afford the clothing could wear it . lupe is owner to ROSARIO . lupe and alejandro met in spain , but ultimately moved to chicago to settle down with their kids since kylie’s paternal grandparents lived there.

Kylie was born in Chicago , Illinois , but throughout her childhood , she bounced between Chicago, Los Angeles , and Barcelona ! 

kylie took after her dad , immediately falling in love with soccer since she was little . it wasn’t like the castillos pushed her into it , she found the sport herself . kylie , along with her siblings were a sports family in general . most of her siblings got into some sport growing up , whether they took it seriously or not was up to them , but kylie definitely did. 

kylie and her dad are really close for the fact that he basically coached her throughout her entire athletic career . kylie is very competitive because of this , and super into keeping herself fit . she sees a goal , she wants it , and she’ll do anything to get it . her jersey is #3 !

besides soccer , she really loves to sing and it came out of nowhere but it was due to all the family parties she has . often an acoustic guitar would be brought out and everyone , including kylie would be singing along to vincente fernandez - heck , you know the castillos hired a mariachi band to be part of these gatherings . 

ky spent a lot of time with her grandparents who would ALWAYS be blasting old mariachi / love songs , singing at the top of their lungs to each other , and from this kylie enjoyed what music did for her . performing was just another thing that came easy to her . the stage , whether it be an actual stage or just a small little space where she was surrounded by family , it was home to her , and she was never afraid . the one place where she could vocally express herself is through her lyrics . ky and her cousins often would write down song lyrics , pretend to perform for thousands of people - but it wasn’t something she ever thought she’d do . it was just for fun , and she took up extra curriculars besides soccer that related to it . i . e dance , acting , etc. 

yet , that was something else , her eyes were on the prize , and that was soccer . sort of . 

kylie had everything set for her to continue playing soccer after high school , to eventually make it onto the US Women’s Soccer team - yet she deadass started to slowly give it all up at the beginning of her 4th year of high school , hanging with the stoner kids , practicing less , putting less effort. she eventually found the underground rap scene -  she loved soccer , but it was time for something else , especially when her dad was mad at her , the field didn’t feel like home like the stage did .

on soundcloud , and youtube , kylie lent her vocals to some guys she met , being on their tracks . her sound was unique because she sang and rapped in both spanish and english . she was earning a name online , her followers going up and tbh , she wasn’t trying but it came to her and when she saw the numbers rise , and her name get out there a bit . she rlly started working on that part of her life . 

A MESS ?! * TW : abortion , drugs , etc .

in high school , she met giovanni ho ho hoe narciso . they were friends for a long time until finally , they started dating . definitely one of the reasons, but not the main reason why she also didn’t care about the sport as much - but kylie’s dad blamed gio a lot fo kylie not playing soccer . so her dad didn’t like gio , and to make matters worse , he didn’t like gio’s dad . so it was a HOT MESS . kylie ultimately had to choose between her family and gio , and when she said yes to marrying gio , she chose gio .  

18 years old and she ran off to marry gio - except that didn’t happen . 

she woke up one morning , he was gone and she couldn’t get a hold of him anymore . ky really didn’t have a choice besides going back to her family , and BET her dad was all ‘i told you so’ 

she couldn’t contact gio but YOU BET she ended up finding him eventually to get in the lasdt mfng word but that conversation ended up with her just being hurt , and it was the last time she really saw gio . he moved on , whether she believed it or not , he did .

so fast forward not long after that meeting . kylie found out she’s pregnant . obviously , it was gio’s . and she had two choices , keep it or get rid of it . 

without telling anyone , except her best friend , kylie got an abortion . which , no one knows , not even her family , not even gio .

SECRET ! 

        ***again , not many people know this ? but the                  one above is a secret too ?? she’s just full of          secrets. JKFDHDFKG

from 20 - 21 , kylie moved out , hopping from place to place within chicago . but she definitely went off grid . not caring for social media , not contacting her parents . 

kylie went into a strip club and at first it was for jokes , but when she got on the pole - she was actually good ?? JDKHGDKFJHDFKJH so the manager offered her a job and well , bitch took it . so she did that for a year , hanging with the wrong crowd, drinking every day , smoking weed which is a staple for her , but she started to do blow - which is .. not a staple for her . it was a dangerous year for kylie .

but doing blow , and selling it for awhile while working the pole gave her the connections she needed to meet rich guys with status in the music industry. 

so eventually , her EP made it in the hands of a producer for sony music latin . 

so she left the pole and started being featured with big time Latin names 

think cardi b’s start up and yeah , she definitely drugged men and stole from them while doing this too DKJGFHDKFJ

PERSONALITY + CURRENT SITUATION !

kylie’s back bitches ! as in people already knew her but she’s been M.I.A for a year , so she’s back and ppl are like wtf KDJGHDKFJGHSFKDJ and she lives in New York now

currently she’s working on her first album release.

besides the mess , she’s a GOD DAMN GOOD TIME. if you ever need to get drunk and party. kylie is your girl . if you need to get fucked up, you better have her on speed dial.

kylie’s the bitch with the bottle of patron , serving tequila shots , and then dancing on top of tables.

highkey always ready for a fight . she doesn’t care where she is , she will always SWING. don’t play games thinking she’s gonna back down from a fight bc she won’t. if u want a fight , ky will give u one KJDHGKSFJDHGKSDJGH talk shit get hit is her motto and i hate her for it

she has a black cat named mijo

her friends and family are the loves of her life . literally , if you mean something to her , there’s nothing she won’t do for you . she will ADORE YOU

if ur her enemy .... that’s fun too. :)

confident AF

she’s an all around bitch i hate her , but she’s a mess , and she’s funny , and she’s too much sometimes .

too stubborn for her own good all the time bc she thinks she’s always right. 

she’s also really goofy when she wants to be

has a hell of a good work ethic , will get shit done when it needs to be done . is definitely the pushy friend to encourage others to do the same.

BEST HYPE WOMAN EVER

she loves assholes.

her lito, lita, ita, tito {grandparents} are her favourite people ever

will cuss you out in spanish and english

hella hot tempered and uhm...

YEAH THERE’S A LOT BUT YEAH I THINK I GOT IT COVERED KGJHDSKFHG

[southsidewrites]

The One with the Red Sweatshirt (Sweet Pea x Reader)

PART TWO to The One with Betty and Jughead’s Wedding

Summary: Betty’s revealed that she’s not pregnant, and now, in the middle of the wedding, Toni realizes that the pregnancy test belonged to you.  Now, you need to tell the father.

Word Count: 5649

Request: From anon: “ Do you know the friends episode, after Rachel finds out she’s pregnant, and the gang tried to find out who the father is bc Rachel won’t tell them?? Could you do that with the reader and Sweet Pea??“

Author’s Note: Another Friends imagine, and my first two-parter!  This is definitely a follow-up to The One with Betty and Jughead’s Wedding, but if you’re familiar enough with the show, you probably don’t need to have read it.  This is also one of the longest things I’ve posted, so buckle up.  It’s also a bit more angsty than I’m used to, but I promise it has a happy ending.  Enjoy, and let me know what you think!

The Southside Serpents as Friends Masterlist 

My Masterlist

Read this fic on A03 or Below!

~

Jughead’s eyes shot open. “Wait, if you’re not pregnant, then what were Toni and Y/N talking about?” he demanded, looking over Betty’s shoulder at us.  His face was a blend of confusion and anger. “Why were you guys saying Betty was pregnant?”

At that, Betty shot around, and the whole room went quiet.  It may not have been a big wedding, but at that moment, it felt like there were a thousand eyes fixed on scene unfolding.  Your breath was caught in your throat. Luckily, Toni sprang into action.

“It was me,” Toni said, her voice hurried and low. “We found a pregnancy test in Betty’s bathroom, but it was mine.  I panicked and tried to hide it.”

Thankfully, Toni’s voice was low enough that only those in front of the church could hear.  Across the aisle from you and Toni, the groomsmen were reacting in equally dramatic ways.  While Sweet Pea looked like he couldn’t decide if he wanted to laugh, cry, or scream, poor Archie just looked like would rather be anywhere but there.  You still couldn’t speak.  Your jaw had dropped in what surely looked like surprise, but Toni knew the truth.  You weren’t surprised that she was pregnant—you were surprised by the length she was going to in order to cover for you.

Fangs had managed to snap his mouth shut and was frantically looking at the crowd.  While they had heard bits and pieces of the conversation, no one really knew what was going on, and they were getting restless.

“Okay, well, wow.  Shit, we need to talk about this later, but right now, we need to get this wedding on the road,” Fangs managed.  He looked back at Jughead and Betty who seemed completely shaken by the new revelations. “Are you guys ready?”

“I suppose,” Betty said with a weak chuckle.

“The faster we get this over with, the better,” Jughead agreed.

“Excellent.” Fangs reached down to his waist and clicked on the mic that he had mercifully remembered to silence.  “Sorry for the slight disruption everyone.  Thank you for coming today, and…”

His words faded as your head spun.  As if hadn’t been hard enough keeping it a secret, now Toni knew, and soon, everyone would.  It’s not like she could keep the ruse going indefinitely—it would be your stomach that would start to grow, after all.  Not that you would ever ask her to do something like that.  Hell, you never would have even asked for her to cover now—she just did when you found yourself incapable of basic human speech.  

As the ceremony went on in front of you, you thought about how deep of a hole you had buried yourself in, wondered if it would be possible to crawl your way out.  More than that, though, you thought about the father—the brief, secret time you had shared. It had been a fling born out of too much alcohol and fueled by a friendship that went so much deeper than some easy sex.  You had been the one to cut it off when you saw how fast things were moving—how much he desperately wanted to tell everyone.  It had been one of the hardest decisions of your life, and now, here you were, faced with a decision infinitely harder.

The ceremony flew by, and before you knew it, Toni was dragging you to the bathroom, shoving away questions by angrily muttering about periods.  When you were locked in the family restroom, she just stared.

“Really, Y/N?  How the hell could you lie to me about this?”

You swallowed hard, trying to work up the courage to meet her heated gaze. “I mean, it’s worth mentioning that I didn’t outright lie so much as not correct you when you made an incorrect assumption.”

“Are you kidding me?” she nearly shouted.  Then, her voice dropped to a low whisper. “I faked a pregnancy for you. I haven’t even been with a man in close to a year—how do you plan to keep this a secret?”

“I don’t,” you sighed, sitting on the closed toilet seat and resting your head in your hands. “I can’t, not forever anyway.  I just—” your voice cracked, and a few small tears leaked out. “I guess I just wasn’t ready to admit it, not even to myself.  C’mon, T., I’m not ready to be a mother.”

Her voice took on a softer note, and she crouched down in front of the toilet to look at you. “Y/N, girl, who’s the father?”

You shook your head, crying for real now. “No, no way.  I haven’t even told him yet, so there’s no way I’m telling anyone else.”

She nodded slowly. “Okay, that’s fine.  We do need to get you cleaned up now, though.  I did just admit I was pregnant and that I blamed it on Betty, so I imagine everyone’s going to have questions and maybe a few choice words.”

“You’re right.” You let out a heavy sigh and grabbed a handful of paper towel to mop your face off. “Can you keep the ruse for a little longer?  Just a few days while I figure out how to tell the father.”

She pressed her lips into a tight line then nodded. “Fine, but I’m telling Betty the truth.”

“No need.  I will when we get a minute.”

“Okay.” She pulled you off the toilet and into her arms. “It’s going to be okay, Y/N, really.  We’re all here for you—me, Betty and Jughead, Fangs, and even Pea.”

You almost choked as you nodded into her shoulder. “I know.  Thanks, T.”

“Anytime, girl.” She smiled. “Now, let’s go face the everyone.”

~

“I just can’t believe it,” Betty mused.  Dinner had just finished, and the two of you were sitting the head table alone, everyone else having gone off to either dance or get more drinks. “How could Toni be pregnant?  Not to mention lie about it.  I mean, it’s 2018, for god’s sake—there are ways to prevent that.”

Her words cut to the core, and you had to bite your lip to stop yourself from snapping.  “Well, yeah, but accidents still happen.  You can do everything right, and sometimes things still go wrong.”

She gave you a confused look, but then a waiter came by handing out champagne. Betty took one, gratefully downing nearly half of it before she looked up to see you swishing yours thoughtfully around the glass.  It was only a few seconds before her eyes widened in recognition—you were never one to pass up a free drink, especially on such a stressful day.

“Y/N,” she breathed, her voice dropping to a pitch so low you almost couldn’t hear it. “It wasn’t Toni’s pregnancy test in the trash, was it?”

You let out a shaky breath—in the past few years, Betty had become one of your best friends, and you couldn’t bring yourself to lie to her.  Slowly, you shook your head.

“Holy shit.” Her blue eyes were wide with shock. “Who’s—”

“I’m not telling,” you said firmly, not letting her finish the question. “He doesn’t know yet, and I’m not telling everyone else first.”

Your tone had her thinking twice about asking anything else.  Before she could break the now-awkward silence, though, Toni sat down.  Immediately sensing the tension, she gave you both a look.

“Did you—”

You nodded curtly, taking a sip of your water. “Yeah, I did.”

“Good, now we can get on to the important business.”

“What’s that?” Betty asked, perking up immediately.

“A second pregnancy test of course.” She gave you a pointed look. “I’m assuming you did just take the one, right?”

“Yeah, but what good will more do?” You were still looking longingly at the glass of champagne in front of you.  If there was any time you would kill for a drink, it was now.

“No, no, that makes sense,” Betty agreed, nodding vigorously and moving the offending alcohol across the table. “It may be a false positive—they happen sometimes.  Polly said she did like four tests just to be sure when she suspected she was pregnant with the twins.”

“And I’m already prepared,” Toni said, gesturing down at her overstuffed purse as an explanation for her disappearance. “So, Y/N, what do you say?”

You looked down at her purse, your gut clenching and unclenching at the prospect.  No matter what the answer was, you had a feeling you wouldn’t be happy. “Yeah, I’ll give it a try. Better safe than sorry, right?”

“Exactly.” Toni placed her hand reassuringly over yours. “Seriously, Y/N, everything’s going to be okay.  I promise.”

You nodded deliberately, even though you were completely sure that was a promise she’d never be able to keep.

~

You were pacing, unable to sit down as you waited for the test to process.  Finally, the timer on your phone beeped, and you froze, your legs turning into blocks of ice.  “I can’t do it.  I can’t look.”

“I got it.” Toni crossed the bathroom and plucked the test off the sink. Slowly, she looked down at the little screen.  Then, she looked up at you, her face perfectly unreadable. “Y/N, it’s negative.”

In an instant, your heart dropped into your stomach, and you felt like you needed to puke all over again.  “Negative,” you breathed. “Like, as in I’m not pregnant.” You could feel your eyes starting to water, and your heart was racing like it wanted to beat its way out of your chest. “How can I be not pregnant?” You lowered yourself to the floor, resting back against the cool tile wall. “I felt it—I knew it—I—I—”

“But, Y/N, I thought you didn’t want to be a mom,” Betty said softly, collecting her massive skirt and crouching down next to you. “You said you weren’t ready.”

“I wasn’t,” you replied, “but I guess it was growing on me, the idea of—” your breath caught, and you started to cry again.

“Shit, Y/N,” Toni breathed, walking over to you.  Her lips had curved into a slight smile. “Good thing I was lying.”

“What?” you demanded, looking up with a start. “You lied?”

She nodded, holding out the plastic stick. “To see how you would react—to test how you really felt about the whole thing.”

You clutched the plastic stick—the small plus sign made the heaviness in your chest lift immediately. “Oh my god.  That’s a risky fucking test, Toni,” you laughed.  Your voice was still heavy with tears, but you managed a weak smile. “But wow.  I’m pregnant.”

“Yeah, you are.” She smiled and squeezed your hand gently. “Congratulations, Y/N, you’re going to be a mom.”

Betty’s smile widened, and she flopped onto the bathroom floor with you to hug you. “I know this is all so overwhelming, Y/N, but I’m so happy for you. You’re going to be a great mom.”

Lightly, you rested your hand on your stomach.  There was no sign of anything, really.  And you weren’t even sure you could tell, or if it was all just in your head.  Either way, you knew that your baby was in there. “Shit,” you breathed. “When you grow up, kid, there’s going to be a hell of a story for you.”

Betty and Toni laughed, and you joined in surprising yourself with how okay you felt.

“So I suppose I should get back to my wedding now,” Betty laughed, pulling you to your feet with her.

“S’pose so.” You grinned, pulling them both into a hug. “Thanks, you guys.”

“Of course, Y/N,” Toni replied. “Best friends forever, remember?”

You laughed, wiping away the remains of tears from your eyes. “Best friends forever.”

~

“May I have this dance?”

There was a hand with a tattooed thumb held out in front of you.  Your lips curving into a small smile, you looked up to see the face of one of your oldest friends looking down at you. “Sure, Pea.”

He grinned and took your hand to pull you off the chair. “Good.  You’ve been entirely too boring tonight.”

Laughing, you allowed him to pull you onto the dance floor.  The night had flown by, and it was nearly time to send the happy couple off.  In the meantime, you hadn’t stopped thinking about how you would tell a man that his life was about to change forever.

“C’mon, Pea,” you replied, wrapping his arms around your neck to dance. “Between Betty and Jughead and Toni, there was no more room for excitement.”

“True enough.” He hummed along to the slow, romantic song as he led you around the floor.  Then, he looked down pensively at you. “Is everything okay, Y/N?”

You nodded, wrapping your arms more tightly around him and breathing in his painfully familiar scent. “’Course it is.  Just a long night, that’s all.”

He wasn’t convinced. “Are you sure?  You know you can tell me anything, right?  I don’t care what did and didn’t happen between us—I’m still always here for you.”

Biting your lip nearly hard enough to draw blood, you nodded. “I know.”

“So never be afraid to tell me.” The song came to a close, and it was time to send Betty and Jughead off. “Promise?”

“I promise.”

“Good.” Glancing around he placed a light kiss on your forehead. “Love you, Y/N.”

“Love you too, Pea.” Every part of you hurt as you drew apart.  You could feel the heat left behind by his lips on your forehead, and you ached to tell him the truth.  You couldn’t, though.  Not tonight.  Not when you had already broken his heart once before.  What would this mean for you?  For him?  You didn’t break up because you didn’t love each other.  It was the opposite, really.  You loved him way too much, and now, you had to break the news to him that he was going to be a father.

~

“I just don’t know how you’re going to do it, Toni,” Fangs said, shaking his head regretfully. “Being a single mom is just so hard—I watched my mom do it for so many years, and while I know she loved us and did the best she could, it was just so much work.  She never really got to have a life, to live out her dreams, to do anything but take care of us really.”

“I’ll be fine, Fangs, really,” Toni said, shooting you annoyed glances. “I’m a strong, independent, badass woman who knows what she wants and works hard to get it, and I will be an amazing mother.”

You knew she was talking more to you than to him, but it didn’t ease the ache in your gut. The three of you were sitting in your apartment, still reeling from the events of the previous evening.  You had a pounding headache, and you were almost certain you were nauseous.  It was like finally admitting your pregnancy gave you morning sickness.

“Well, I still don’t think you should have to go through that,” Fangs asserted.  He got up from his usual chair and started to pace. “And why won’t you tell us who the father is?”

“I told you, Fangs,” she repeated. “He’s nobody, a one-night stand.”

Fangs had a steely look on his face, but then he softened, dropping to his knees in front of Toni’s chair. “I’m not letting you do this alone, Toni. No one should have to do this alone, especially when the guy is some deadbeat douchebag who doesn’t deserve his kids anyway.” He took a deep breath and took her hand in his. “Antoinette Marie Topaz, will you marry me?”

Her mouth gaped open, and then snapped shut. “Yes!” she sputtered. “Yes, sure, I’ll marry you.”

He grinned. “I don’t have a ring right now, but I’ll get you one.  I’ll be here for you, Toni, no matter what.”

Your jaw had dropped, and you were looking back and forth between your two friends.  It was too much for you, though.  Between the lying, the secrets, and now Fangs’s unparalleled dedication to his friends, you just couldn’t take it anymore.

“I need to go,” you blurted, already out of your chair and out the door.

Toni and Fangs were left gaping in confusion.  Toni knew why, but Fangs was dumbfounded.  “What’s that about?”

Before Toni could answer, Betty was rushing through the door, completely disregarding the fact it was shut. “Where’s Y/N going?  She looked distraught.”

“Cooper-Jones!” Fangs greeted. “What the hell are you doing here?”

Betty rolled her eyes, setting her purse down on the table. “I was on my way home, and I saw Y/N storming out.  I was worried.”

“We desperately need some distance from this friend group,” Toni sighed, leaning back into the couch. “Remind me why we live across the hall from you guys again?”

Betty gave her friend a pointed look. “For real, though?  What happened?  Is everything okay?  Is the baby—” She cut off, realizing her mistake and giving Fangs a deer-in-the-headlights look that revealed more than her words ever could.

Fangs’s jaw dropped almost comically, and he finally got up off the ground in front of Toni. “Wait?  Is Y/N pregnant too?  Well shit, I can’t marry both of you—unless, of course, we move to Utah and become polygamists, but that would be hard because—”

“No, dumbass!” Toni said, standing up to smack him across the head. “She’s the only one who’s pregnant.”

“And you let me propose?” he demanded, throwing his hands in the air. “What kind of friend does that?  I was ready to marry you!”

Toni rolled her eyes. “And I never would have let it get that far—I panicked, okay?”

“Not okay!  Not okay at all!  How can Y/N be pregnant?  Who’s the father?” Fangs was pacing now. “Because I can still marry her is he’s as much of a douchebag as Toni’s made-up one-night stand.”

“She won’t tell,” Betty sighed, ignoring Fangs’s weird marriage comments like they were absolutely nothing new. “Not until she tells the mystery man at least.”

“Mystery man…” Fangs mused, “Wait, I know who the father is!” Without another word, he darted into his room, slamming the door shut behind him.

Betty’s eyebrows pressed together in frustration. “Was there supposed to be more to that?  Like, a name, maybe?”

“Fuck if I know,” Toni replied, walking to the fridge to pull out a beer. “I still stand by it, though.  We all need some space.  I vote we kick Fangs out to live with Pea, and Y/N and I get our own place in a different building somewhere reasonably far from Manhattan.”

Before Betty could reply, Fangs stormed back out, something red in his hands. “I know who the father is!”

“You’ve mentioned,” Betty drawled, “care to share your findings in a way that makes sense to the rest of us?”

“Well, see that’s the thing.  I don’t know who he is—I just know that this is his sweatshirt.” Fangs spread the sweatshirt out on the kitchen table. It was a New York Red Bulls Soccer hoodie, something that literally anyone in New York might own.

Betty’s jaw had dropped, though, and she was shaking her head in awe. “I know who that belongs to.”

“No way,” Toni said. “It’s just a Red Bulls sweatshirt—it could be anybody’s.”

“But it’s not,” Betty asserted. “Trust me, I know who the father is.”

~

“Wait, what?” you demanded into your phone. “You want me to meet you at the coffee shop?  Why?”  

“Just because,” Betty insisted. “Would I do this if it weren’t important?”

“I don’t know—maybe.”

“Just get over here, Y/N.  Seeing as I’m almost positive you’re just wandering around Battery Park being mopey, it’s really the best thing for you.”

With a muted groan, you looked up at the blurry image of the Statue of Liberty in the distance.  You didn’t want her to know she was right. “Fine.  I need to catch the subway, but I’ll be there soon.”

“Good.  See you then.”

“See you then.” You hung up the phone and slid it into your pocket. These mopey walks through Battery Park had been a recent development, so you were impressed that Betty had picked up on it so quickly.  Sighing, you sat down on a bench, trying not to let the memories of the place overtake you—it had been the location of yours and Sweet Pea’s first date, after all. “How the fuck did I mess this up so badly, baby?” you muttered, rubbing a hand lightly over your stomach. “I really hope this is a funny story for you one day.”

Before you could drift deeper into memories, your phone buzzed aggressively. Betty was texting you again, demanding that you hurry up.  Not wanting to keep her waiting, you hauled yourself to your feet and set off for the subway.

~

When you walked up to your favorite coffee shop, you were immediately greeted outside the front door by an energetic-looking Betty. “Jeez, Y/N, took you long enough.”

“What’s going on, Betts?  You’re being super weird.”

She took a deep breath. “We know who the father is.”

Your mouth gaped open, and you started shaking your head. “No way—how did you find out?”

“Fangs found a sweatshirt that he left behind, and I recognized it right away. I mean, the guy wears it all the time.”

Your heart felt like it was going to beat right out of your chest.  A sweatshirt?  They found him from a goddamn sweatshirt? “So you know.” Your voice was low and heavy.

“And I know you may not want to deal with it now, but you need to, Y/N. You need to deal with it.” She bit her lip, starting to look nervous. “So, I brought him here.”

“You brought him here?” you demanded. “What the actual fuck, Betty?”

“Y/N, you need to face this.” Her jaw was set sternly. “You can’t leave him hanging on this forever.”

You weren’t about to admit that she was right. “Fine,” you huffed, steeling yourself for the upcoming conversation. “I’ll talk to him, today.”

“Good.” Her smile returned, and she pulled you in close for a quick hug. “I’m proud of you, Y/N.”

“Yeah, yeah, yeah, girl gets pregnant, keeps it a secret, weaves a web of lies, and lets other people take the fall, what a person to be proud of.”

“You’ve got this,” she encouraged, grabbing your hand and pulling you into the coffee shop.  The warm, familiar smell of coffee overcame you, and you felt more at ease than you did just a minute earlier.  Maybe you did have this—he was one of your best friends, after all.  How hard could it—

“Reggie Mantle?”

“Hey, Y/N.” His smile was charming as he stood up to greet you with a casual hug. “It’s so good to see you—you look great.”

Your jaw had fallen open, and you looked back at Betty with shock. “Mantle? You think it was Reggie Mantle?”

Her eyes widened, and she pulled the sweatshirt out of her bag, frantically holding it up for our inspection.  “But, I—the sweatshirt, it’s—”

“This one?” Reggie asked, unzipping his coat with confusion to reveal a matching red sweatshirt. “What about it?”

“I have fucked up,” Betty said plainly. “And I am sorry.” Without another word, she turned on her heel and stormed out of the coffee shop leaving you and Reggie confused in her wake.

“So, um, what’s this about?” he asked.

You shook your head, pinching the bridge of your nose in an attempt to ward off what was sure to be a brutal headache. “Betty made a mistake.”

“Well, then.” He grinned again, running his hand through his already perfectly-styled hair. “It’s been too long, Y/N, how do you feel about getting dinner sometime, maybe—”

You held up a hand to silence him. “Reggie, I’m pregnant, and it’s not yours.”

Slowly, he nodded. “That’s definitely not how this conversation has gone for me in the past.” He chuckled slightly. “Congratulations, Y/N.”

“Yeah, that.” A deep tiredness overcame you, and you wanted nothing more than to go home and crawl into bed.

“I’ll see you later, Y/N.”

“See you later, Reggie.”

~

“You idiots,” you fumed, storming into the apartment. “What the hell was that all about?”

“I really am sorry, Y/N,” Betty pleaded. “It’s just that you were dating him for a while, and he did have the sweatshirt in my defense and all—”

“And you.” You rounded on Fangs, cutting Betty off. “Why on earth would you keep a sweatshirt that some guy I slept with left behind?  Who does that?”

He raised his hands in surrender. “It’s a good sweatshirt, Y/N.  I would have worn it if it wasn’t so damn big on me.”

You groaned loudly, rolling your eyes. “This is just too much.  I’m taking a nap, and I don’t want anyone to bother me unless the apartment building is literally burning down.”  Without waiting for a response, you hurried into your room, flopping on the bed and burying your head in the pillow in one motion.

~

As Y/N’s door slammed, there was a knock on the front door.

“You’ve got to be kidding me,” Toni groaned. “Who now?” She hauled herself off the couch and to the door where she opened it to reveal Sweet Pea.  While she gaped, he strolled in, unconcerned with whatever had been going on before he entered.

“Is Y/N here?” he asked, looking around. “Jughead and I were cleaning up at the venue today, and we found this.” He held up a wallet that Toni recognized immediately as her roommate’s.  She must have been too stressed by the pregnancy to even notice it was missing.

“She’s—”

Betty cut off Fangs with a slap to his mouth. “She’s out.”

Sweet Pea nodded, setting the wallet on the counter. “Well, make sure she gets it.  I have to get to work.”

“Sure thing,” Toni answered brusquely.

Just as he was about to leave, Sweet Pea saw the sweatshirt still sitting on the coffee table. “Oh man, I’ve been looking for that forever.” He grabbed it off the table and tossed it over his shoulder. “Must have left it here sometime. See you guys later.”

“See you later, man,” Fangs replied, still oblivious to what ha just happened.  As soon as the door shut, Toni and Betty burst out in a flurry of chattery shrieks. “Wait, what—” His eyes widened, and he looked between the front door and Y/N’s bedroom door. “Holy mother of shit, Sweet Pea’s the father!”

~

As Sweet Pea left work that night, his phone was lit up with five text messages.  All of them were from Y/N.

Sweets, are you working tonight?

Shit, you must be.  Sorry.

What time do you get off?

Are you doing anything after?

We need to talk.

As he read, his heart sank deeper and deeper into his stomach.  Talk?  What could she possibly want to talk about?  It had been nearly two months since they’d broken up, and it still hurt every damn time he saw her.  Whatever it was, though, he had to be there for her—he’d promised.  On that day she’d broken up with him for no good reason at all, he’d promised he’d always be there for her.  Dating or not, she was one of his oldest friends, one of his best friends, and he couldn’t bear the thought of letting her down.

Sighing, he opened her contact and hit Reply.

On my way.

~

There was a knock on your door, and you grunted in response.  Sweet Pea was still at work, so it had to be one of your roommates.

“Hey, Y/N, can we talk?” Fangs asked, his voice soft.

You rolled over, surprised by his gentle tone.  Normally, Fangs was the one who kept everything light, the one who made everything feel better.  At that moment, though, you weren’t so sure. “What’s up?”

He sat down at the foot of the bed and ran his hand through his messy hair. “We know it’s Sweet Pea.”

Your heart dropped, and you felt your eyes start to water.  Your voice barely came out above a whisper. “Does he know?”

“No, of course not,” Fangs said, shaking his head.  He crawled up the bed to sit next to you, wrapping his arm around you to let you rest your head on his shoulder.  If Sweet Pea had been your oldest friend, Fangs was a close second. “I would never tell him.”

“Thank you,” you murmured, breathing in his familiar scent. “What am I going to do, Fangs?”

“What can you do?  You have to tell him.”

“Of course I’ll tell him—what kind of person would I be to keep that a secret?”

“I know, I know,” Fangs soothed, running his hand gently through your hair. “He’s not going to freak out, Y/N.  I mean, the guy’s in love with you.”

You shot upwards. “How do you know that?”

He quirked an eyebrow. “Did you really think my two best friends could date without me knowing?  Let’s be real, Y/N.  I knew. I think we all knew—except maybe Jughead, dude’s a little oblivious when it comes to anything but Betty.”

Your lips curved into a smirk. “But you didn’t know who the sweatshirt belonged to?”

He groaned. “I’m an absolute moron, I know.  We all have our moments.”

You rolled your eyes and pulled him in close for a hug. “Thanks, Fangs. This means a lot to me.”

“Good.  And remember, he may be my best friend, but I will kick the shit out of him if he hurts you.” He smirked. “And my offer of marriage still stands.”

You laughed harder, resting your head on his shoulder. “Fangs, I would not mind being married to you at all, but I think I need to work out my shit with Pea first.”

“Oh yeah, for sure.” He smiled, that charming, comforting grin. “Good luck, Y/N.”

“Thanks, Fangs.”

~

The next time there was a knock on the door, you were ready.  You had washed your face, pulled your hair into a bun, and did everything you could to clear your head.  Of course, that was impossible, but you did your best.  When you heard the knock, your nerves skyrocketed. It’s only Sweet Pea, you said to yourself. It’s only Sweet Pea.

“Come in.”

Sweet Pea walked in—he was still in his fitted black button-down and slacks from work.  He managed an impressively popular bar, and it was quickly turning into the place to be in Manhattan.  It was a wonder he was off work this early at all, but you weren’t about to question it.

“Y/N, what’s going on?” he asked, sitting down at the foot of the bed. “Is everything okay?”

“I don’t know,” you admitted, barely able to look at him.  You could swear you felt the beginnings of a little life in your stomach, and it only made you more nauseous. “I just don’t know.”

He sensed the depth of your stress immediately and scooted closer, taking you in his arms. “You can talk to me, Y/N.  What is it?”

“I’m pregnant, Pea,” you said, your eyes heavy with tears. “And it’s yours.”

His eyes widened, and you could feel his heart starting to race. “Wait, what? What about—Toni—and—” he stuttered. “I—um—how—we used a condom.”

You couldn’t help but chuckle slightly. “Pea, they’re only like 97% effective.”

He stood up in rush.  “What? Why the hell don’t they say that on the box?”

“They do,” you commented.  Somehow, his misplaced panic had the effect of calming you down. “Like, on the front in big letters.”

He threw his hands in the air and turned back to face you. “So.” His voice had dropped back down to an almost inaudible level. “We’re going to be parents.”

You nodded as he dropped to his knees in front of you, putting you closer to eye level. “Y/N, I love you more than anyone I’ve ever loved before.  This may be absolutely insane, and you may not even want this, but I want to be here for you.  Not just the baby—you.  If you’ll have me, I’ll stick with you through whatever comes.”

“Pea.” You cupped his cheeks and pulled him to his feet with you. “This is a huge commitment—a baby’s for life, and I’m stuck with it, but you don’t have to be”

“Y/N, I’m not sure you’re getting this.  My love for you is for life.  I don’t give a damn how scared we were, how much shit our friends will give us.  I love you, Y/N, and I want to be with you for the rest of my life.”  His deep brown eyes seemed to be looking straight through you, through every wall you had ever built to keep him out.

“I love you too, Sweet Pea.” Slowly, you stood up on your tiptoes and pressed your lips into his.  He was hesitant at first, holding back, so you wrapped your arms around his neck, pulling yourself closer.  Then, he let loose completely, tangling his hands into your hair and holding you as close as he could.  His lips parted yours, and he kissed you deeply, longingly, like he’d wanted to do nothing more since the day you broke his heart.  

“We’re going to get through this, Y/N,” he said breathlessly. “I promise. From now until the day I die, I will be here for you and this baby.”

Your smile felt like it would be permanently stuck on your face. “There’s nothing I’d like more.”

~ 

Thanks so much for reading!!  Let me know what you think, and check out my other stuff if you enjoyed it.  You can read Part Three here!

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[loookovt-blog]

whaddup it’s me robyn again ( 22 / she & her / cst ) bringing another lady muse to the yokai ~ this is JOSEFINE but she goes by JO and this is her mask. more about her is under the cut !! pls plot w her she has NOTHING so far tbh. HEART THIS && I’ll come into your dms/disco to plot !! it’s kinda long tbh TW: alcoholism, abuse, murder, ptsd, and general violence. 

overview

name:   josefine “jo” prior

alias:   nyx

age:   eighteen

sign:   aries

gender:  cisfemale

sexuality:  bicurious / heterosexual

birthplace:   new orleans, louisiana

current  residence:   tokyo,  japan

occupation:   the crowd control

faceclaim:   zoey deutch

persona

label:   the  crimson

+ traits:  humorous, low maintenance, determined

— traits:   explosive, boisterous, untrusting

alignment:   chaotic neutral

mbti:   estp

hogwarts:   slytherin ( w some gryffindor )

anatomy

height:   168  cm.

weight:   66  kg.

build:   toned but femme

eye  color:   hazel

hair  color:   strawberry blonde  ( currently )

defining  features:  has 3 tattoos: the kanji symbol for ‘power’ on the back of her neck, a small crescent moon on her right wrist, and her mother’s birthday in roman numerals on her ribcage

physical  condition(s):   none

neurological  condition(s):   ptsd, blacks out from trauma/rage when repressed memories are recalled

brief overview

i was gonna write a whole ass bio for this, but i’m gonna save it for later !!

was born to aaron prior (raised jewish, stopped believing) and eloise foret-prior (french-cajun, from old money, married him against her parents wishes) in a small town outside new orleans.

mom was a preschool teacher, dad worked in a factory. eloise’s parents gave them a generous financial wedding gift but said that was the last financial support they’d receive from them. they were adults.

aaron developed a dependence on alcohol. he started out just being rougher in bed but began accusing eloise of cheating, screaming, throwing things at her, and occasionally being violent with her.

then she found out she was pregnant. she had a baby girl - named her josefine rochelle foret-prior. eloise & aaron raised her with as much love as they could find in their household, but neither of them made much money and aaron was blowing through the foret’s gift, spending it on booze.

josefine and her mother were very close. when her father drank, the two would stay in jo’s room and read books. her mom was very smart, so she spent a lot of time making sure jo was an intelligent girl. it was a successful effort, and she actually ended up skipping second grade.

when jo was in fifth grade, her world fell apart. her father hit a new low and got more drunk than he ever had. in a stupor, he accidentally killed eloise, shoved her too hard and she hit her head against a counter. he cleaned the mess and hid the body, told the authorities she must have finally worked up the courage to run off with the man she was having an affair with. there was no affair.

josefine saw the whole thing - and repressed it, repressed it, repressed it. she doesn’t remember any of it.

after this, aaron dropped the ‘functioning’ from ‘functioning’ alcoholic and his drinking stopped being just nights and weekends. he ended up losing his job at the warehouse and living on unemployment checks. they weren’t nearly enough, especially since he kept drinking.

middle school for josefine was just her keeping her head down and grieving for her mother. freshman year of high school, though, she found anger.

through high school she balanced being an honor’s student with her newfound hobby — underground fighting. she did well enough, maintaining a B average in her classes (which, while she did not know she’d need it later, did include japanese) and normally doing an effective job covering her bruises, so the teacher’s seldom asked about them.

graduated at 17 because of her grade-skipping, and spent the last year before she was finally a legal adult saving up money to move out. an ex-member of the yokai in the fighting scene told her about the crew, said if she made a name for herself in tokyo, she could get recruited, and never have to struggle again. she thought it was bullshit tho lmfao

five months ago, right after she turned 18, her dad died of a stroke. so she decided to take a risk and go to tokyo, booked a flight for the day after his funeral. 

she was in tokyo’s underground fight scene for 2 months before someone from the yokai heard of her and asked her to join, and she immediately accepted.

she’s been here for three months and is starting to adjust.

so for her personality.. generally she’s just a typical tomboy (even tho i hate that word). like she’s a bro and she’s a bit rowdy and low maintenance and a generally friendly person who likes to just have fun after like. having to work so hard for everything.

but like also she’s fiercely independent, and she can be a bit blunt or even harsh. i guess u could say she’s mean - but she’s just trying to be honest skjfhjfjh

she has a lot of darkness to her. not only does she kind of run on her anger in general but sometimes, when she’s fighting (underground or in a heist), if a guy gets in her face or aggressive or reminds her of her dad, she kind of blacks out and goes into a blind, violent rage. it also happens when like, she feels threatened. like she got mugged once and nearly beat the guy to death. nearly. she hasn’t killed anyone. yet.

she’s not sure if alcoholism has been passed to her but she does try to limit her drinking just in case it is. she does smoke a lot of weed tho. she’s not like a ‘pothead’ or whatever but she’d smoke socially. she doesn’t smoke cigarettes either bc she doesn’t want to have any ‘vices’ like her dad.

speaks english and japanese, but her japanese is not the best?? like. she learned this shit from high school classes and language apps and maybe some youtube videos. she’s not a prodigy like hyeyeon so she isn’t just flawlessly picking this up lmfao. still, she can have conversations, but she may forget words or have shitty grammar. she’s also picked up on a smidge of korean bc of how many korean ppl are in the crew.

hobbies: besides fighting she also likes reading (bc of her mom), and photography (she bought a camera w her first yokai payment). she’s really into outer space, and she loves animals. she loves to swim, and p much any other activity like hiking, rock climbing, biking, whatever. she also likes to paint but she doesn’t really have the patience so she doesn’t do it often.

anyways, she needs like everything so bls plot w her. okay ily bye.

[juliivn-blog]

[ bill skarsgård, cismale, he/him, 29 ] BRAIN STEW by GREEN DAY? whenever i hear that song, it reminds me of JULIAN NILSSON. maybe because they’re SELF-RELIANT but also CAVALIER. they’ve been living at mulberry apartments since SEPTEMBER of 2018 in APARTMENT 203 and have 1 ROOMMATE. [ lainie, she/her, 21+, cst ]

hello bitches it me ( lainie ) back at it again !! this time bringing u the anti adrian and pls be wary bc there are a lot of sensitive topics down below ( tws for major drug use, drug addiction, death, grief, shitty parenting, neglect, abandonment?? kind of idk better safe than sorry ) also u can find a tl;dr at the bottom since it’s literally SO LONG

BACKGROUND

so bear with me bc his background info is kind of Long!! his mom and dad are from just outside of st louis, missouri. his mom came from a pretty wealthy family and she was just like tryna be ~rebellious in her young adult years by dating julian’s dad (who came from a super trashy family and had a Bad Boy Rep). when she was 19 and he was 22 she got pregnant ( with julian ) and her fam was like get rid of that baby or ur gone !! but they were “““madly in love””” and she was on her rebellious shit so they literally eloped to the city ( st louis ) and got an apartment together and had julian but never actually got married bc they were too cool ( read: irresponsible ) for that. ofc this ended up being rly miserable bc she was used to living the rich life and now her family had disowned her, and suddenly she was starting to realize this dude she had a kid with was kind of a deadbeat party boy with no interest in having a family, not to mention she started realizing like?? i don’t actually want a kid this is a lot of work?? so like julian’s childhood years were a lot of him having to learn to take care of himself and not having anyone to depend on most of the time. and that’s not to say they didn’t both care abt him on some level bc there were definitely times they paid attention to him and gave him a birthday party or two but for the most part he was on his own

his secret favorite memory is flying a kite with his dad when he was 4 but u would be more likely to win the lottery than get him talking abt that

fast forward 5 years and finally julian’s dad, now in his late 20s and getting antsy, peaces the fuck out to los angeles to live his best party boy life. baby julian is very upset bc even tho his dad doesnt pay a lot of attention to him he like idolizes him. julian’s mom is saltier than EVER about having to take care of a kid but she doesn’t wanna go to LA ( especially for this asshole she doesn’t even like anymore ) and her parents won’t have anything to do with her or her illegitimate child so the NEXT 5 years are a lot of moving around from shitty apartment to shitty apartment and job to job by themselves. his dad would now and then send weird postcards and letters and pictures and stuff from cali so he had like a vague idea of the fact that his dad was living his own life somewhere that looked super wild, and when he was 11 years old he sent a letter back asking if he could come live with him. his dad contacts his mom, there’s a bunch of fighting, but in the end julian did indeed get to go live with his dad in los angeles, mostly bc his mom just didn’t give a fuck anymore and was lowkey like…u know what fine take him i can have my life back

obviously his dad does not know how to be a dad !!! he kind of thought of julian as his little like…..sidekick like he just thought having this 11 year old kid around was hilarious. so julian went to LA and was living with his dad and his dad’s friends in a relatively nice apartment but like it’s always filled with people doing drugs and having sex and it’s just. not child friendly at all. so that’s how julian was introduced to weed at the ripe young age of 11!!! from there on out he was like a big time weed and cigarette smoker, was very early having sex and trying other drugs, and by the time he graduated high school he was already hardcore doing coke

so julian like kind of wanted to go to college bc some part of him did crave normalcy, but he was way too far up his own ass to get his shit together for that !! plus like….he didn’t rly have good role models. so his first year after high school instead of getting on a good path for his future he decided living his best life would include moving into an apartment with his cokehead best friend. it was around that time that julian met his first boyfriend. he was already totally aware he was bi, had slept with boys in high school, but this was the first time he rly fell in love with a guy. he was like……….head! over! heels! for this boy. julian met him at a club and he was like sort of soft and relatively innocent until they started dating and julian got him smoking weed and then snorting coke

this next part is very triggering so please read with caution !! when he was 23, julian tried heroin for the first time. for about 6 months it gradually got really bad, his life started spiraling, and his bf was like….becoming unable to deal with it, especially bc while julian was getting worse his bf was kind of trying to move in the opposite direction and get off the coke and get his life back together. there was a lot of fighting, but his bf kept not actually making the move to end things bc he loved julian and was just like hoping something would turn around. one night, however, in a moment of weakness, he let julian talk him into trying heroin with him. it was kind of an “i promise i’ll get clean if u try it with me this one time” thing. being in and out of consciousness and not really aware of what was going on, he didn’t notice that his bf was overdosing and he ended up dying simply bc the heroin was too much for his body and he stopped breathing. julian didn’t notice until the morning when he woke up, and obviously that was by far the most traumatic thing that’s ever happened to him and left some deep ass emotional scars

so following this, he actually did check himself into rehab. he was there for 3 months, got completely clean, but he only managed to stay that way for two weeks before he was first snorting heroin again and then back to shooting up and selling drugs

it was about 2 yrs later when he was 26 that he met his next bf while he was doing a deal at some seedy bar outside of town. they quickly fell into a completely unanticipated relationship–notably, julian’s first since his boyfriend’s death. in spite of that trauma and feeling guilty even as he did it, he started introducing this boyfriend to drugs. in his mind, it was kind of a thing where he fell in love really fast and really hard out of nowhere and he saw this sad little thing with no place to go and drugs are the only thing he’s ever known himself, so it was very natural to be like “here try this it helps” and also naively convincing himself he’d never let what happened before happen again

so 3 years later they’re living together and completely broke, living mostly off the money julian makes selling drugs and whatever else they can scrape up, when his bf decides he wants to do a road trip across the country. julian’s very impulsive, doesn’t really give a shit about anything in LA anyway, and to top it off has a hard time saying no to him. SO a road trip it is !! they make it all the way across the country before finally using up the last of their money and realizing they don’t have enough to get back

they stopped in north carolina for a while while julian saved up enough cash for them to at least get somewhere they liked better, which is how they wound up in baltimore !!

here their jeep completely broke down and julian sold it so that the money from that plus the money he made selling drugs they could put toward a deposit on an apartment

it’s in their heads to get back to la eventually, but baltimore is kind of their ~scene so julian’s in no hurry. he’s selling drugs again but they use a lot of what he’s supposed to sell so......they’re not going anywhere any time soon anyway ytseugukhej

PERSONALITY

so now that his lengthy as fuck background is over with………julian is an extremely EXTREMELY dry sarcastic person. the guilt over his bf has made him a hell of a lot worse, like his sense of humor is so so much darker than it was before that happened, but he’s honestly just a rly sarcastic person to begin with. he has some softness inside especially for people he rly cares abt, but you will not catch julian being sentimental or taking literally anything seriously unless you’ve managed to seriously worm your way into his heart

he’s not like a GRUMP tho at all he just….doesn’t take things seriously. he’s literally the embodiment of every bart simpson meme

“whatever my dude” is his aesthetic

he’s very careful about his drug dealing, he won’t go around talking about it or anything, he does it all under the radar as much as he can and especially having done it for so long now and having experienced a lot of traumatic crap, he’s pretty good at what he does and he won’t fuck with people he doesn’t trust

even when it’s warm it’s not totally unlikely to see him in long sleeves bc he has really bad track marks all over his arms from shooting up so much, especially in the early days when he was really bad at it

he absolutely will not talk about his past and if anything even close to it comes up in conversation he will skate right over that so qUICK ur head will spin

i think that’s IT FOR NOW if u made it this far i commend ur effort and attention span. im gna list some plots n stuff below ( beyond the song connections ) and hit me uP for some angst bc ya girl is here for the drama as usual

CONNECTION IDEAS

u can find song connections HERE

any and all drug related things !! people who buy from him ( especially weed, he’s a lot more lenient about to whom he sells weed as opposed to other stuff ), people he introduces to drugs, friends he actually does drugs with

he’s very dry and enigmatic but he’s also quite social so seriously give me friends for him. he’s high a LOT but not always and he likes being out doing stuff

definitely somebody or somebodies who don’t trust him and his drug addict bart simpson vibe please please give me people who don’t like him

along that same vein it takes a lot to get julian worked up and in fight mode bc he prefers to just let things roll off his shoulders but it would def be fun to have someone who gets him to that point

also somebody who?? maybe thinks they can “fix” him and genuinely does their best to try and persuade him to change his life and that it’s not too late to turn everything around ( this is basically the song connection medicine by daughter )

if ur muse is randomly from st louis missouri????? hit me up with a past connection from way back in julian’s childhood

also someone he went to high school with in LA if they’re from LA. this person would probably not be surprised at the way julian turned out ystefygdjhs

AND TL;DR BECAUSE THIS IS SO LONG

a drug addict and dealer who learned to take care of himself from an early age because of neglectful parents. got a boyfriend addicted to drugs and lost him to an overdose when he was in his early twenties, went to rehab, relapsed, met another bf years later with whom he decided to road trip across the country and got stuck in baltimore. dry, sarcastic, kind of a douche, epitome of every bart simpson meme, walking tragedy. 

[shadowclarys]

i’m a little late, but i just watched the pll series finale and i’m a little mad and SO UPSET

don’t proceed if you don’t wanna get SPOILERS (although i believe everyone’s already watched it)

i thought it was shit that AD was twincer (alex drake) - mainly because most of spoby scenes in this season, apparently, it wasn’t spencer, so I’M VERY UPSET, which kinda makes me question WHAT SPOBY SCENES IN THE SERIES WERE REALLY SPOBY, so

btw, someone from the cast or the crew (maybe even marlene, idk) - i don’t really follow their tweets/interviews bc i’m always busy af so - said AD was there since the pilot?????? does that mean maybe alex was pretending to be spencer in a scene or more? THEY KEEP MAKING THIS TWISTED GAMES WITH OUR MINDS WHEN IS IT EVER GONNA STOP

and when hanna was hold captive and spencer appeared in some kind of illusion to her, i thought the twincer theory was a good one, but they kinda managed to make it a bad thing for me as i had imagined it would go totally different at that time (if it were real) - the theory started in early s7, so we couldn’t have known it was a real deal back then but i already pictured some things happening later in the series if it were true - btw, it was a good theory back then to me also because then spaleb could be fake BUT NOOOOOOOOO NOW WE WILL NEVER KNOW WHAT WAS REAL AND WHAT WAS NOT WHAT WAS SPENCER WHAT WAS ALEX I SRSLY AM SO MINDFUCKED RIGHT NOW

besides, alex doesn’t really have a motive to torture the girls????? it’s not their fault, not even spencer’s, that she got a terrible life. it’s not the girls’ fault that charlotte died. it’s not their fault that it took so long to find out who killed charlotte. it’s not like they were better, smarter, idk, than the police to figure it out???? WHAT IS THE POINT OF ALL THIS? you could say it’s because she’s insane and just evil but still wtf (and she certainly wasn’t before she met wren and knew about charlotte etc so????)

(ok i don’t remember how jenna got blind after her surgery, but it doesn’t matter, i guess) (this does tho: i don’t remember many things about the series bc a lot happened so i might be wrong about this one, but still) SERIOUSLY, JENNA KEPT BEING BLIND? she was one of the most motivated people to hate the girls, to want to screw them over, etc BUT SHE STILL NEVER ACTUALLY DID SOMETHING AGAINST THEM WITH THE INTENTION OF DESTROYING THEM. she only got in the AD team because she needed money for her surgery, NOT TO RUIN THE LIARS’ LIVES. she even WARNED them (through toby, but still) that spencer wasn’t truly spencer, but a twin sister she didn’t know about until now. ps: ‘i may not be able to see, but i can smell a bitch a mile away‘ will be forever in my heart JENNA IS A FUCKING QUEEN AND SHE DESERVED BETTER

btw, what happened to sydney? they just simply forgot about her lol

i wanted SO BADLY, right from the start, for lucas to be in the A(D) team. we were so close to that, and i was so happy, only to be even more frustrated later in the finale. we didn’t even get to know more of his story with charles, which could be something to make him be a part of the AD team. UGH SO MUCH POTENTIAL WASTED, I’M SO MAD

and let me just add here: that idk where from accent was SO BAD. not because troian isn’t natural from somewhere with that accent or because we’re used to her american one, but it didn’t really add much to the character? it just kept distracting me from the story alex was trying to tell and every word she spoke just made me make an ‘ew’ face.

btw was i the only one who saw RIGHT AT THE MOMENT it wasn’t a mirror AND THAT IT WAS ANOTHER PERSON (obviously, the twincer) when spencer was touching her hair and alex did the same so she would think it was a mirror and bla bla bla? i guess some people might have jumped off when she said ‘boo’ haha but anyways that reveal was epic, i must admit it. not the mirror illusion thingy, i thought it was kinda cliché tbqh, i always expected that if the twincer theory was real, but the ‘boo’ was nice lol

moving on tho, i thought the liars didn’t get a certain end. spoby was just mentioned, we never saw them getting together again. we deserved at least a hug or a kiss scene (after alex was arrested, to be obvious it was spoby). toby was doing that helper thingy and stuff, but he needs to make some money to live????? spencer just got into law school, i mean???? does that mean she’s still living with her parents? ezria had the wedding, but are they gonna get money only from the movie of their book? they should have gotten a definitive job idk. and ok they’re gonna adopt a child, but i wanted to see more of that. haleb got that boring elope AND I WANTED A WEDDING, HANNA IN A BEAUTIFUL DRESS, CALEB IN A TUXEDO, EXCUSE ME, I DEMAND THIS SCENE TO BE SHOT!!!!!!!! emison never found out their babies’ father was wren????? and are they still teaching at the school?

it also doesn’t make sense that alex accepted mona in the AD team after knowing she was the one who killed charlotte, so?????

and IS MONA REALLY NOT IN A SANATORY AFTER GETTING IN THESE MANIPULATIVE GAMES SO MANY TIMES, HOW COME SHE GOT TO LIVE OUT OF A MENTAL HOSPITAL??????? or if that little world of her is actually a sanatory, HOW would they allow her to play with mary and alex? and how would she get a boyfriend? THAT WOULD BE LIKE THE GUY’S ABUSING HER wtf it might be a sanatory, but i think it isn’t, so... and how did she get mary and alex out of prison and locked them in her own ‘dungeon’???????

i srsly think alex and mona should have died, especially alex, but whatever

also WON’T HALEB EVER GET THEIR HONEYMOON???????????

I WANNA SEE EZRIA’S HONEYMOON TOO

fuck, so many cool things from their lives were left out i’m so sad ): i wanted to see emison’s labor, emily holding alison’s hand, the babies’ names (maybe if it were two boys one would be named after emily’s dad, or if it were girls they could name them after other beloved people - idek if the babies are boys or girls smh) the liars waiting outside; i wanted to see the girls making a career, getting their lives together, A PROPER HALEB WEDDING, A PROPER SPOBY ENDGAME SCENE, ezria and haleb’s honeymoons, ugh

EMISON WEDDING REPRESENTING LGBT+ COMMUNITY <3

perhaps ezria deciding to get pregnant through emily’s belly (since she didn’t carry her own children, it would be sweet, you know) or even alison’s

maybe aria’s, hanna’s and emison’s kids playing with each other :3

the only ship that got a full ‘circle’/closure, with a wedding, a honeymoon (even if it wasn’t shown), a future planned and kind of concrete was ezria. haleb got a crappy ‘wedding’ and a (2-second-announcement - if it was even that long - of) pregnancy (i’d like to see caleb kissing her belly, they finding out the baby’s sex, picking a name...), emison got a shitty proposal (although they had some cute scenes, like the picnic one), spoby didn’t even get a kiss, not even a hug, fml, i’m so angry.

can i just say “i'll think of all that might have been” (quoting evermore from batb bc it just fits right in lol - i’m actually crying as i type ‘lol’ tho)

it left us with unsolved things that probably will never be explained (perhaps there’s not even any explanation, since it wasn’t planned from the start and it turned into this gigantic mess with no links at all and no way to be fixed)

the show was supposed to end with answers but all it gave us was more questions

i’m upset :/

[theangry-ace]

short reviews of R18 drama cd

I just started drama cd a few weeks ago and I just think it’s a neat type of p0rn for someone like me. plus it’s a fun way to practice listening. if you’re interested to try drama cd as well, or just wanted a short spoiler to avoid certain red flags like rape or incest, I think I covered them.

I gave rate on story and the sex. me being myself, that’s the two main part that’s important to categorize them. I personally prefer story driven stories. I am aro but I do appreciate romance once a while.

I will mention the voice actors’ name if I like them. and I always call them by their alias, just so to be familiarize with them (so I can easily pick them out).

you can sampled almost everything from airavalky.

part 1

Ai Yume story: 4/5 icha icha; a bit too intense for me / 5 review: i can't really say what i feel for this series. there's a lot of red flags like stepsiblings(?) relationship and possessive/abusive relationship. the story itself is interesting but it gets kinda too, uhh, dark. not for a faint of heart i think.

Aka no Hanayome [finished] story: 5/5 icha icha: 4/5 review: the theme is there would be a bride bearing a mark on her person that matched the guy she's destined to marry but this time around, one girl has four marks that matched four different guys. supposedly the guys needs to, uh, get close to the girl, so the flower marks can 'bloom' and would bear the proof of the guy to inherit the family fortune or something like that. unfortunately for the girl, she suffered sudden seizures due to the 'hanayome' curse that can be calmed by... you guessed it, sex. it's silly but i think this might be the best series that i've come across so far. vol.1 (Peroperonchino) = guy is the cold prince type but gets warmer in the end. he cute once he’s not acting like a snob. vol.2 = the first son of the main family. he's a kind older brother type. he'll explained a bit about the curse thing. vol.3 (Margarine) = my favorite bc he's such a nice dude. he's a classmate of the girl and came from the branch family so he will kept on saying he want nothing with the whole 'head-of-family transfer' thingy. vol.4 = my least fav bc he's a bit of an asshole, not giving the girl the chance to say no to his advances and just do what he wanted. 

Arashi no ichiya tabi no otoko [finished] story; 2/5 icha icha; 3/5 review: two strangers taking shelter from the rain. idk i kinda expect more for some reason (since i like chasuke). the sex is pretty sudden and like there's no connection except two people sharing one space decided to sex one another.

Bed made nyan nyan wo matte kurenai [finished] story: 2/5 icha icha: 3/5 review: it's Cider being an adorable boyfriend. that's all you need to know. there's not so much of him being a cat though, just a mention of his character has a cat shirt. they missed the opportunity to make me die.

Bodyguard wa kare no iinari [finished] story: 4/5 icha icha; 3/5 review; this one surprised me since i expected the guy is the bodyguard but instead it's the girl. storywise is kinda good; a singer songwriter who can’t sleep without a girl to hug who is also threatened by a obsessed fan, so his company employ a bodyguard and so the girl character came into the picture. i’d say the story is good, the sex is unnecessary kinda.

Cafe romaana [finished, maybe] story: 3/5 icha icha: 3/5 review: it's a sweet story actually but not that special. it revolves around a coffee shop that was owned by three brothers. vol.1 - i think this is the best of the three for no reason except i like it best. girl is already in relationship with the youngest brother. his issue is being overshadowed by his two brothers but he still tries his best to follow their lead. vol.2 (Tetrapot) - girl is a waitress of the cafe. second eldest dude is trying to better his barista skill and wish to enter a... competition? vol.3 - the eldest brother who tried to date a girl who supplies the flowers to the cafe.

Calling bloom [finished, maybe] story: 4/5 icha icha: 3/5 review: the idea is like a host club but they do delivery and would fingerbang or sex with you if you ask. just the catch is not to fall in love with them. i think storywise is good. prepare to have feelings though. Hikaru (Sawa Manaka) = spoiler alert, he fell in love with the girl when he first met in a konbini before, but since hosting is his job, he can't say that so his story ends one sidedly and bittersweetly. Syu = he's the number one host of anemone. haven't really heard his side yet aside from the first track. Kaname = girl actually chose him because he looks like a anime idol character she liked, not because he was an ex idol. i kinda felt bad for him. didn’t finish his side yet. Hazime = haven’t got to this one yet.

Circle catalogue [finished, maybe] story: 4/5 icha icha: 3/5 review: about a relationship between a girl and a band member. pretty sweet but nothing special. if you just need a good story about a good relationship, this is kinda one of it. Basist (Asagi Yuu) - if asagi using his toshishita kare voice is one of your weakness, you will not survive this volume. i died three times before i even get to the icha icha scene. girl is the... manager? or at least one of the staff of the band. she wanted to quit (for a reason i dont quite catch) and dude is not okay with that. thankfully it ended quite sweetly. Leader (Kawamura) - girl is a fan of the band and is dating the leader. the couple has been troubled with physical distances between them ever since they first met and now they started to worry if their happiness won't last that long. Drummer - I’ll get to this one later.

Cream pie story; 5/5 icha icha; 3/5 review: the one thing that separates this from the other is that there is a solo masturbation scene from the dude and it kinda make me laugh even though i don't think i should. hehe. story is very close to realistic couple's problem i guess. try this if you need story. Ninomiya (domon atsushi) - this one i don't quite understand why they fight. guy wanted to find a place with elevator near his wife's work so if she got pregnant it wont be too hard on her. but she felt like he just assumed that's what she wanted???? maybe i'm too aro to understand this is reason enough to fight but i could see it happening irl. Yuuki (tetrapot) - the problem with this couple is that the girl/wife? had to work outstation for three weeks and guy was so lonely i kinda felt bad for him. poor guy he did it with her pajamaaaaa. 

Dakarete kara hajimaru koi story; 3/5 icha icha: 3/5 review: i think they're pretty sweet but not much of a story bc they’re pretty short. the one with kawamura is my favorite bc there's a cat<3 actual cat! i have a likings for a guy who gets weak around cats.

Danna-sama series story: haven't heard all of them but those i did 4/5 icha icha; 3/5 of those i've cleared review: there's a lot of volumes so kinda need a separate review for each of them but the basis is similar. sweet story. my favorite might be the one with tetrapot. he made it into my list of favorite drama cd VA because of this.

Date biyori story: 4/5 icha icha; 4/5 review: just sweet dating stories. i especially love the one with murano bc it's just so damn funny and sweet. too bad he didnt do too many titles.

Dousei kareshi story; 4/5 icha icha: 4/5 review: sweet lil story about two ppl living together. nothing really stands out but the story is good.

Enemy coupling [finished, maybe] story: 5 /5 (minus 3rd vol) icha icha: 4/5 (minus 3rd vol) review: in an AU where there's a animal/human hybrid. vol.1 (sawa manaka) = sawa as a cat can fucking end me. he's a younger boyfriend type that dates a scaredy mouse hybrid. he cute and story is actually very sweet. why cant sawa just do this type of character and nothing else??? vol.2 (murano) = dude is same age type of rabbit hybrid who dated a fox hybrid. the sex in this kinda intense... and noisy. but story is good and dude is very cute. he’s dating his fox hybrid classmate. vol.3 = a wolf teacher with his sheep students. i don't do teacherxstudent so i never got beyond the first track. sorry.

Enter the mirror [finished] story; 5/5 icha icha: get so much icha in the end esp the tokutens /5 review; in a alternate universe(?) a kingdom was destined to ruin. there's only three person who can save it and they need to find a rose fairy from a world inside the mirror to do it. story is very good but the sex gets exponentially intense in the end. there's a rapey scene in the beginning though. vol.1 (sawa manaka) = i think this is the first time i heard sawa doing fantasy and it's a good change. he's the righteous knight type. vol.2 = the magician side. he's kinda like the gentle older brother type i think. he would do anything to save his kingdom that he puts something in your food to paralyze you (to rape/unlock your rose fairy power?) but he changed his mind halfway vol.3 (peroperonchino) = the prince. storywise i like his side better since you can feel how desperate he is to save his kingdom. the tokutens sex is very very intense bc he gets jealous very easily.