#especially the scene where cody breaks down at nyx

[as-the-stars-foretold]

the rise of icarus

In which Icarus decides to take revenge.

TW: talks of death, descriptions of blood, yelling/fighting

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The air was metallic and warm. The smell filled every inch of your sinuses and invaded every receptor. It was damp by the edge of the forest and the metallic smell clung to the humid air. It was like breathing in a furnace full of iron.

“Mica? Mica? This isn’t funny anymore,” she said softly, shaking the man who now lay in a crumpled heap in her arms. “Wake up, please. Your sister is waiting for you and- and Epi was going to help you make your mom’s favorite dinner. You said we could watch a movie after!” He didn’t respond.

“Please! Mica, wake up! This isn’t fair!” Their sobbing echoed through the empty street, a cacophonous chorus of hiccups and pleading. “You were just two months older than me and your birthday was coming up! You were supposed to turn twenty-four! The rest of us were supposed to make a cake for you and you were supposed to hate it because basically none of us can bake!” His body was cooling far too fast and touching him scared her. But not touching him, not giving him this company for the last time scared her more.

She had sat there for hours, cradling his body, begging for him to wake up, calling his name. She begged and prayed and bargained, but the impassive Universe did not heed her wishes. It never did. He was cold now, and the rosy flush to his skin was gone, but he still wore a soft smile on his face. Tears, both his own and his friend’s, stained his cheeks and shirt. Nyx kept brushing them away, even though two more would replace the one removed. She picked his body up, struggling a little at the weight but determined not to drop him. The recorder was in her pocket, a heavy reminder of what the intel had cost. They left the bodies of the mercenaries at the mercy of whoever, whatever, found them.

The journey back home was the worst thing they’d ever had to endure. Nyx walked slowly, careful not to miss a step. A missed step for her meant nothing, but a misstep for his broken body meant dishonour. She couldn’t keep Mica alive, but she’d be damned if she didn’t honor him. But worse than that, they knew, was going to be telling the others. As soon as she realized that, she gasped. “Shit, shit, shit!” Gently setting Mica’s limp body against a tree, Nyx fished out their communicator. Cody immediately picked up.

“Boss! You just- just stormed out. Is everything okay?”

“No. Is Mica’s sister there or did she go home?” She waited as Cody yelled something inaudible to another person. Oh, how she dreaded what the next questions were going to be.

“She went back home. Why? What happened?” They sighed, trying to keep their voice from shaking too much.

“Cody. I need you to promise me something. No matter what I tell you when I get back, you need to keep your calm as much as possible.”

“...Alright? Wait, what did you mean by when I get back—” She disconnected the communicator, shaking once more. Cody was clever. He’d figure out what happened quickly enough, probably before they returned. And they dreaded that. How would they explain to Mica’s childhood friend, to his little sister, to his coworkers… What had happened?

Nyx picked him up again, numbness creeping in where dread had been minutes before. They’d have to tell them one way or another, just like they had to tell their friend’s family that their only daughter died. It wasn’t fair. No person should have to tell loved ones about the deaths of their beloved children, siblings, parents so many times. But this had happened often enough that she had grown numb to it. Except this time was different. It was rawer, just like the first time, but angry too.

Anger, anger, anger… they were rather familiar with that emotion. Not in themself, of course, but in their best friends. Or, as the Universe would have it, ex-best friends. The Torchbearer’s drive came from righteous morality and anger. Delphiniums’s power came from anger at their injustice. She was the only one of the three to not have harnessed that anger, to not have burnt their enemies to the ground. Instead, Nyx… watched. She watched the flames dance around the town, sometimes reveling in their hypnotic movements and other times grieving what once was. She knew better than to let her anger control her. But times were a-changing, and the Flamebringer had a path to light.

Standing at the threshold of the Neutralist Headquarters, they shivered. Panic, desperation, guilt, fear—it pulsed and swirled under their careful mask of numbness. Nyx kicked the door three times, holding tight to Mica’s body. The door swung open seconds later. Cody looked at them, worry slowly turning into shock. He stepped to the side silently, a numb invitation for Nyx. She entered and heard the door shut behind them. It sounded like the safety of a gun. They ignored the stares of their agents, instead moving swiftly to the couch and setting Mica’s body down. Kneeling next to him, she bowed her head. Taking a few calming breaths, she spoke.

“I want everybody to report to the Main Hall immediately. This is urgent.” Cody was at her side as soon as she finished speaking. They didn’t look up at the mechanic, but they knew his hands were shaking. He knelt next to her, softly touching Mica’s cold hand. He moved silently as the other agents filtered in. He fixed Mica’s hair, which had come undone somewhere in the fight, scraping out dried blood with his bare hands. He adjusted the necklace and repositioned his arms. Something to keep his hands moving until Nyx could explain what had happened.

A few minutes later and everyone was there. Reactions ranged from shock to horror, sadness to blankness. Cody had moved back into the crowd by now, leaving Nyx to stand alone by Mica’s body. Taking another breath, she spoke softly. Her voice still echoed.

“3:51 PM. Mica was at site three to gather the intel I had talked about a few weeks prior. He accidentally got the attention of Metaphor Mercenaries. He alerted me to that and I agreed to be stationed halfway away. He finished getting the recording, but the mercenaries met him outside the building.” It wasn’t the time for her to grieve. It was the time for her to be the leader her agents needed.

“He held them off for a few minutes while I got to the site, but by then… it was too late,” she took a shaky breath, not meeting anyone’s eyes. “It was a quick death. One bullet to the heart.”

Silence met her. A few shaky breaths and a couple whimpers were the only things that broke it. She waited for them to say something, anything. And finally, a voice rang out.

“What happened to the mercenaries?”

She smiled at that. A dangerous, vicious smile. “Dead.” That word seemed to alleviate some of the tension in the room. Satisfaction that Mica’s murderers had gotten what they deserved. They knew it wasn’t enough.

There were no questions after that. Nyx dismissed everyone, giving them three weeks off with full pay. Some people left quickly, glancing just once at the body. Others took their time, whispering to him or holding his hand before leaving. Soon enough, the only people left in the building were Nyx, Epimetheus, and Cody. Epimetheus was in their office, likely running through various programs to see which one would help them handle the news the best. This left Cody and Nyx.

They were on the roof, sitting on the edge. Neither of them said a word. Nyx stayed quiet, knowing that Cody had something to say. But when he said nothing, she decided to start the painful conversation.

“I need to tell his sister about him. Should she stay with us or would sending her to her parents be the better option?”

Cody didn’t say anything for a moment. As the silence stretched on, Nyx grew anxious. I need to tell him the context, at least. He needs to know what I have planned for the organization. I need to give him closure. Finally, he responded.

“Send her back. It’s not fair to keep her in the city where her brother died.” Nyx nodded, looking at the horizon. The city’s golden glow, which used to comfort her, now just made her angry. This wasn’t her city, their city anymore. It was a tyrant’s city. It was a ghost town.

They fell back into ruthless silence. Nyx resisted the urge to tackle Cody in a hug, to apologize to him until the sun came up. It wouldn’t do either of them any good. Cody wasn’t that type of person. When he wanted to speak about what was bothering him, he would do so.

“Nyx, I need to ask you something.”

Dread.

“Yes?”

“Why… Why did you let him go on the field mission? Why did you even announce that to us? You never used to before.” She sighed, turning to look at Cody.

“I let him go because it’s what he wanted. He told me he was bored, that he felt useless with nothing to do. I didn’t think… I didn’t think tha—”

“You don’t ever think, do you?” She flinched at this, meeting his eyes for the first time in hours. His eyes blazed with a fury so violent it almost made her want to cry. “You don’t think! Prometheus, it’s always the extremes with you. Either you don’t let any of us on field missions or you get someone killed on one!”

“I didn’t want him to go!” She yelled, standing up on the ledge. “I was telling him he was underprepared, that he should have me come with him! He wanted to feel useful? Fine! But it would have done him no harm to let me go with hi—”

“THEN WHY DIDN’T YOU?!” She paused. He was right. Why didn’t she? “I’LL TELL YOU WHY! BECAUSE YOU’RE A GOD DAMNED PUSHOVER!”

“Cody—”

“No, don’t you dare interrupt me! You don’t stand up to anyone, Nyx! Not even your own agent, your own friend. If you felt that going with him would have been the better option, why didn’t you force him to take you?! You were his boss, and more than that, the man would have done anything for you!” Cody paused, breathing heavily. Tears were building in his eyes and Nyx wanted nothing more than to apologize a thousand times.

“In fact, he did do anything for you! When Epimetheus disappeared, he shouldered on twice the responsibility so that you wouldn’t have to! So that you could focus on being the leader the rest of us needed.” He scoffed, glaring at her. “You didn’t even do that. And not to mention him changing his code after that… that night with Torchbearer.”

He had noticed. He had noticed her spiraling. That shook Nyx. She had tried to hide it from everyone, especially Mica. And he had still noticed and cared enough to signal to her that he noticed.

“I’m…” she sighed, shoving down the apology for later, “I know. I wasn’t, and haven’t been, the leader you all need. I regret that so, so much. You’re right, I should have forced him to take me with. Hell, I shouldn’t have announced the mission in the first place! I should’ve just found another way to keep him busy, happy. You’re right.” Cody stared at her expectantly, waiting for her to continue. She looked back towards the horizon.

“I’m sorry. I was pretending to be strong enough to lead you all and that illusion failed. I wanted to protect you all but I couldn’t fight for us. I’m sorry. I was just… lost. Confused, scared. I didn’t know what I was doing, and honestly? I still don’t. But, Cody,” she said, meeting his eyes, “I do know one thing. And that is that I will die for you all if- when the time comes.”

He stared at her. Then he laughed. Loudly, heartily. He bent over, clutching his sides. They stared incredulously at him, anger and fear merging into one. “Oh, Prometheus,” he cooed, wiping tears from his eyes. “Valiant speech, boss. But you haven’t acknowledged the elephant in the room yet.” He met her eyes again, and she was taken aback by the near hatred in his warm brown eyes. “You were the cause of his death. It’s your fault.” Nyx blinked. Then she scoffed.

“I know that, Cody. Obviously it’s my fault. I was the one who sent him on the mission, I was the one who didn’t get there fast enough to save him. But you’re not talking about an important piece of the puzzle,” she leaned down to look at him face to face. “The Mafia is the man behind the murder. Sure, it was my mission that killed him, but the reason for that mission? The Revolution. The reason for the Revolution? The Metaphor Mafia.” She stopped at that, considering her next words. Cody, and for that matter, the rest of the Neutralists, didn’t know of her… rather personal connection to the Mafia.

“And the reason for the Mafia, Cody? Delphiniums.”

He looked at her, frowning. He knew all that, so why was she telling him? They sighed.

“Let me give you some context.”

♠♠♠

“When I was younger, maybe not even an adult, I began my work with the Mafia. My two best friends worked for the Mafia as well. One of them was Wolfsbane. The other? Delphiniums themself. Now, believe it or not, I was rather mouthy back then. I talked back to Delphiniums and they did not like that. They told me I’d be given a punishment for that. I didn’t believe them but… well…

A few days later, I was getting lunch with a friend. She was the sweetest, kindest soul ever. We were sitting outside the restaurant, catching up when suddenly, she keeled over. Understandably, everyone was freaked out. Before people started crowding around our table, though, I grabbed the dart that was on her. It had a little note attached to it. ‘Rule #3: Don’t talk back.’ I knew what had happened, then. I’d been dealt my punishment.” She paused, looking at Cody for permission to continue. When he nodded, she spoke again.

“That was the first death I experienced caused by the Mafia. After that, it sent me into a sort of… paranoia spiral and I pushed everyone away. And then, after Wolfsbane defected with a bang, I started working with the Rev and the Mafia. Around that time, Hephaestus, is when I formed the Neutralists. I will confess, the Neutralists were originally a way for me to play three sides of the game at once, but then you all morphed into… my own, I guess. My friends, my allies, something I needed to protect. Failed a bit at that but…” Cody nodded, leaning back. She glanced down at him, but the man was unreadable. She felt a flicker of pride at that. He was an open book before joining, but now he could mask his thoughts better than she could.

He was silent for a long time, before finally looking up at her, understanding drawn on his face. “So what you’re saying is that technically… the entire thing is the Mafia’s fault?”

“Not technically. Explicitly.”

“Right. But it’s also your fault in that you were forced into this ‘game,’ as you called it, and the game wrapped you up in strings too tight.”

“Precisely. I was forced into this, into… being a pushover, as you said, by Delphiniums.”

“But why didn’t you fight back?” That’s what she liked about Cody. He was always asking why? Why couldn’t they take direct action? Why didn’t Nyx fight back? Why?

“I was in a bit of a precarious situation,” she explained. “Delphiniums had a lot to hold over my head, so I pretended I just… didn’t have any attachments. And that act seeped into me, and became a bit of my reality. Plus, I had Torchbearer’s secrets to keep.” Cody nodded, finally seeming to have calmed down a bit.

“And, one last thing—” he looked at her as she sat down next to him, “—none of what I said was to absolve me from guilt or blame. Mica’s death was still hugely my fault, but I wanted you to know that there’s more at play here than you think.” He frowned a little, confusing her.

“By the way, boss, I just wanted to say sorry.”

“You were right, though.”

“I may be right, but you’re grieving too. It wasn’t fair of me to say all of that when you literally saw your friend die.”

She smiled kindly at him. “You needed to say it. I’m glad you did, regardless of the questionable timing. I needed to hear it from one of my own anyway.” Cody smiled back.

He looked exhausted, but Nyx had one more thing to bring up. He beat her to it.

“We’re working with the Revolution again, sorta, right?”

“Yeah…?”

He turned to her, fury in his eyes again. Only this time, the fury was directed at someone else.

“So why don’t we… pay the Mafia back, if you will?”

A grin spread over her face, venomous and eager. “Do you remember the protocol we had set in place for a death or serious injury?” Cody nodded, understanding dawning in his eyes.

“Protocol N3M.” She stood up again, looking like a proper leader for the first time in years. Pulling out her communicator, she paged everyone. They all picked up.

“Protocol N3M is in action,” Cody said, before nodding at Nyx. She smiled.

“We are Nemesis.”