#fast lean pro caps

[dreamauri]

┇𝗗𝗘𝗗𝗜𝗖𝗔𝗧𝗘𝗗 𝗧𝗢 𝗧𝗛𝗘 𝗢𝗡𝗘 𝗜 𝗟𝗢𝗩𝗘 - prologue ┇ ─ ୨୧ ─ ─ ─ ─ ─ ─ :🪴: ─ ─ ─ ─ ─ ─ ୨୧ ─ ┇you're the best, an unbeatable driver fighting for a place on the grid ┇︶︶︶︶︶︶︶︶︶︶︶︶︶︶︶︶︶︶︶︶︶︶︶︶︶꒷꒦˚₊   ┇ . 🌿 :: pairing — ( max verstappen x fem! driver! reader ) ┇ . 🫧 :: ⁠genre — ( angst )  ┇ . 🌿 :: ⁠word count — ( 858 ) ╰ 🫧  :: ⁠ content warning — ( X )

☆★ yayy!! thank you @lorarri for the title <3 i did a little character introduction at the end cause this series is going to have a lot of ocs (not y/n), anyways, enjoyyy ━━

( fic master list | general master list ) ( requests )

2015 — Baku, Azerbaijan

The F1 grid watched intensely. You didn't need to over take, already in P1 with your trophy secured. But you did anyways, passing drivers one by one till you once more made it to the top of the grid. "Phenomenal performance by Seventeen, securing her Win once more."

Daniel Riccardo, Max Verstappen and and Carlos Sainz had stayed over to watch the F2 race, Crossing Paths once more with the all too famous masked driver. Jumping out of your car, you're greeted with your team shouting your number over and over as they hugged and kissed your famous black helmet. "Seventeen? Who names their child a number?" Carlos asked leaning on the edge watching.

"I don't think that's her real name, mate." Daniel commented taking a sip of the redbull can. "It's not, she doesn't use her real name. You can say it's like a . . . What do you call it? For superheroes?"

"Code name?" "Yeah, codename." Max nodded, his eyes trained on you as you did your post race duties and podium celebration. "She's scary." Carlos shivered standing straight ready to leave.

"She's nice." Max mumbled watching as you passed by. He gave you a small wave, you returning it hesitantly. An unconscious smile crept on his face, a little blush dusting his cheeks.

"You like her?" Daniel whispered teasingly, making the teenage boy frown in denial. "She's just a good driver. I- I don't really care." He folded his arms glaring at the older man.

★ ☆ ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

2016 — Qubec, Canada

"And that is ferrari's reserve driver, and apparent F2 champion, seventeen, defending Vettel from Riccardo." Making the Canadian grand Prix so early into the season was a mistake. It was raining heavily in Montreal, and heavy slush was expected sometime during the race.

You could barely see, relying on instinct only as you took the turns and the curves. Your heartbeat was in your ears and you could feel it in your mouth as you continued to defend your temporary teammate from the red bull driver.

You were forcing the wheel in erratic directions to keep on the racing line, understanding the algorithm of the rain. "Seb i— o—t, se— —s —ut. Floo— it." You heard the choppy voice over the radio, passing by the crashed out Ferrari.

"Fucking hell." You cursed, accelerating as you maneuverer through the rain like a pro. It felt amazing to be in such a fast car, a big step up from the F2 motor. You pushed the DRS button once you got the chance, overtaking the current reigning champion.

"P—, p—. Ke—p g—ing." You continued to push every corner. "P what?" You asked not hearing the message. "P—." "Oh for fucks sake. Radio is shitty." You shouted overtaking the apparent Manor.

★ ☆ ━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

"It's not always so easy to be high up in the standings as a rookie. How do you feel?" "My eyes hurt." You replied blandly to the interviewer, rubbing your eyes tiredly. Your face was covered from the nose down with your hair up in your famous claw clip bun, still wearing the '1st Place' cap for some reason. You were doing your best to keep the photographers from catching major features of your face, needless to say, you were doing a good job.

With Hamilton to your left and Riccardo on your right, you sat in the press conference room bored out of your mind as the interviewers asked you dumb questions. "You guys should go back to school. Maybe you can learn how to ask good questions for best results in writing essays."

"How old are you? Aren't you still in school." Lewis asked, chuckling as he turned to face you. "Graduated early." You shrugged, going back to facing the sea of journalists. "Is there a driver you would like to battle with the most?" "Um . . . Not really. They're either retiered or dead. Maybe . . . maybe Verstappen, Max not Jos. I've raced against him in the karting championships, I'm sure he improved and could put up a better fight now." "Do you think you'll get a full seat next season?"

"That's a difficult question. Not all uh . . . teams have enough trust in female drivers. Hopefully I demonstrated how worthy of a seat I am. I am after all the first and only female to finish on a podium and win a race so . . . we'll see where it goes."

It didn't go. It never was going to.

You were stuck in the factory, working on the car for someone else. And when a seat was finally free in 2018, you watched as they gave it to someone who was not you. You were furious, no other team would take you, a girl. Not even Ferrari wanted you on the track and you were an exeptional driver.

the only thing that kept you grounded was going back home to your family. Your uncle and cousin were your pride and joy, the ones that kept you going. But the question was, what were you going to do now?

— 𝐌𝐀𝐗 (𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐏𝐏𝐄𝐍) | 1 🇳🇱 :: ↳ 1997.09.30 (25) ↳ red bull's golden boy ↳ three time world champion

— ??? (???) | 17 :: ↳ 2000.07.22 (22) ↳ f4 world champion, f3 world champion, f2 world champion ↳ 2016 rookie of the year ↳ youngest f1 race winner

— 𝐊𝐈𝐋𝐋𝐈𝐀𝐍 (𝐊𝐑𝐀𝐔𝐒) | 7 🇩🇪 :: ↳ 1996.06.06 (25) ↳ mercedes second driver ↳ 2016 world champion ↳ youngest world champion

— 𝐌𝐄𝐈𝐊𝐄 (𝐊𝐑𝐀𝐔𝐒) | 25 🇩🇪 :: ↳ 2000.07.22 (22) ↳ mclaren second driver ↳ 2022 rookie of the year

— 𝐋𝐄𝐈𝐋𝐀 (𝐄𝐋 𝐆𝐀𝐌𝐀𝐙𝐈) | 🇪🇬 :: ↳ 2014.05.06 (8) ↳ best cousin in the world

— 𝐌𝐀𝐑𝐀𝐖𝐀𝐍 (𝐄𝐋 𝐆𝐀𝐌𝐀𝐙𝐈) 🇪🇬 :: ↳ 1985.05.05 (38) ↳ #1 uncle

— 𝐋𝐄𝐎𝐍 (𝐊𝐑𝐀𝐔𝐒) | 25 🇩🇪 :: ↳ 1971.01.17 (54) ↳ grumpy old retired driver ↳ 5 time world champion

[pookha]

A Promise Ring: Chapter 1

Luna has received job offer that will keep her at Hogwarts and wants Harry to stay there with her. She takes him to the Black Lake to talk. A pre-engagement happens? Harry wants to stay there with her and makes a surprising career decision.

I see I didn't post chapter 1. Here it is. Sorry they're out of order.

The moon hung silvery and huge in its fullness on the horizon. Luna squeezed Harry’s gloved hand as she dragged him after her.

“Where are we going again?” he asked, his breath puffing out in clouds as he spoke.

“Down near the lake,” she said mysteriously, her voice muffled by the Gryffindor scarf he’d given her when she told him that she’d misplaced her Ravenclaw scarf.

He let himself be led by her, trusting her knowledge of the castle grounds. He knew the inside of the castle better because of the Marauder’s Map; but, over her years here, she’d traversed more of the grounds on her rambles than even he had.

She pulled him down to the Black Lake and along its shore, then they slid into a narrow path between two large boulders.

“Here,” she said, indicating a small clearing a few metres down the path.

Harry spread out a blanket on the ground while Luna stripped off her gloves and rummaged in her pack. Harry remembered how Hermione had helped her with the Extension Charm, smiling as Luna finally got it right on the paper bag they'd been practicing with. They’d grown closer since they’d all come back for Eighth Year together. Luna seemed to have stepped into the spot that Ron had occupied, quite often being the deciding voice between Harry and Hermione. He missed Ron and Ginny. Ron had decided to help George with the shop and Ginny had turned pro. Harry sometimes wondered if he should have gone pro, too, but then he thought about Luna and what was happening wouldn’t have happened if he had.

He realized that he'd become lost in his thoughts for a moment and said, “Sorry?”

“I didn’t say anything,” Luna said as she pulled a folded up piece of fabric out of her pack. She handed it to Harry and pointed at a place where two small boulders made a gap. Harry snapped out the fabric which expanded to fill it like a windbreak. When he turned around, Luna had pulled a jar out from her pack and was digging a hole for it in the soft dirt near the lake’s edge. When she had put the opening of the jar flush with the ground, she conjured bluebell flames in it. It was another spell that she’d learnt from Hermione this year. Luna’s glowed more purplish than Hermione’s but they provided the same warmth and soft light.

She sighed and opened her jacket to let in the warmth from the jarred fire and sat down. Harry followed suit. After he’d sat down she leaned into his shoulder and took his hand. He squeezed gently three times fast, then two times slow. She smiled and squeezed back, two times slow and three times fast. They both laughed.

Harry held his free hand out to the flames and warmed them. Luna slid her pack closer and dug in it again.

“What’re you after?” Harry asked.

“Gifts for the merfolk,” she said.

He nodded. This was normal for when they came to the lake.

“What’ve you got this time?” he asked.

She pulled out an inflated bladder of some sort that made him think of a worn-out football, a forked stick of rowan, and a few sealed jars with dim witchlights in them.

“A dowsing rod?” Harry asked, picking up the rowan stick.

She nodded. “It’s specifically to find any warm springs.”

“Is this just a ball full of air?” he asked, picking up the bladder.

“Yes, it’s everfull though. I don’t know if it’ll be useful to them, but I thought it might be used at least as some sort of float.”

She gathered all of the objects up, taking the ball out of Harry’s hands. She put them in a sack she took from her pack. Harry pulled the drawstring on the sack, making it waterproof while Luna pulled out what looked like a shower-cap from her pack.

She slid it over her head, then down over her nose, but not over her mouth. Harry tucked her long hair up into it. When he let go and it snapped into place, it inflated into a Bubble-Head Charm that covered her whole head except for her mouth. It had taken Harry weeks to make it and he’d finally had to go to Professor Flitwick for help with the final charms to make it reusable. 

She took the sack and dragged it to the water, making sure it was fully submerged, then she stuck her head under water. With the bubble over her nose, she could breathe and with it not covering her mouth, she could speak.

He saw the bubbles of her singing to summon the merfolk of the Black Lake. He’d stuck his head under a few times to listen and it had been beautiful. Luna sang well, but her voice was normally thin. However; underwater it pierced a beautiful soprano through the water. He remembered feeling the words go through him.

After a few minutes, she pulled her head up and took off the bubble charm. She very carefully dried it and folded it before putting it away in her pack.

She sat back down next to Harry. He turned his face to her and she kissed him, slow and longingly, her hand sliding slowly down his neck to his back. Harry knew this kiss meant she had something on her mind. She was normally so direct, but sometimes she worried about his feelings too much.

After they parted, he whispered in her ear, “What is it?”

She sighed and pulled back.

“I’ve been offered a job.”

“That’s great!” he said enthusiastically. “What is it?”

“Assistant Groundskeeper at Hogwarts,” she said, watching his face.

He held his face still as his thoughts raced. She’d be staying here. He’d be somewhere else, doing something else. Could their relationship survive distance and time? What did he want to do? He knew he’d waited too long to respond.

“I thought that’s how’d you feel,” she said quietly and lowered her head.

He put his hand under her chin and raised her face.

“I don’t know how I feel yet.”

Her face went rigid which it did when she thought he was lying.

“Really, I don’t know. Tell me about this job.”

She laughed.

“You know what the groundskeeper does.”

“Yes, but I don’t know what this means for you or Hagrid. I thought you didn’t like Hagrid.”

“Oh!” She smiled.

“Hagrid’s a good Groundskeeper; I just don’t think he’s a good teacher.”

Harry nodded.

“Fair enough. So you’d be working with Hagrid, learning the ropes?”

“Yes, he’d like to retire in a few years and they’re looking for someone who knows the grounds and can care for the animals and herds and can get along with the centaurs and merpeople.”

Now Harry smiled genuinely. Nobody, nobody, knew the grounds better than Luna except Hagrid.

“It’s pretty physical work, do you think you’re up to it?”

Luna laughed again, long and trilling this time.

“What Hagrid does by sheer force sometimes, I can do with magic. I can’t lift a hay bale on each shoulder, but he can’t levitate them. I can swim in the Black Lake with a Bubble-Head Charm or Gillyweed and he can’t since the Gillyweed won’t affect him long enough.”

She met his eyes.

“I want this job; I was made for this job. I love this place and the creatures and beings in it.”

He started to turn away, but she held his head in her hands and made him look at her.

“I know you love this place, too. Stay here, be with me.”

He put his hands over hers.

“And do what?” His voice was small.

“Teach,” she said.

“What?”

“I know if you asked McGonagall, she’d agree to an…an apprentice teaching position for you, either in Defence or Charms.”

“I…maybe, but I’d never thought about it before,” he lied.

“Don’t lie to me,” she said, removing his hands from over hers.

“Sorry,” he said.

“I have thought of it before, but I don’t know what I want to do. I love the thought of staying here at Hogwarts with you, but I also love playing Quidditch. I don’t want to be so far from Ron and Hermione again.”

She cut him off.

“You know we can’t all stay together forever; we’ll all move on at some point.”

“Yes, but you’re asking me to stay with you and leave Ron and Hermione.”

“They’ll have each other.”

She kissed him again, this time deeper and longer, hungrier .

“And we’ll have each other here. We can build a cottage on the grounds near Hagrids or we could live in the castle in some of the old staff housing that’s been repaired. I don’t care where we are as long as you’re with me.”

“It’s so sudden…” he started, but then splashing from the lake’s edge interrupted.

They saw the bag being pulled away and a moment later a short, pale-grey skinned merman stood on the edge of the lake, his tail reforming to legs. He said something in Mermish to Luna and she replied politely.

He dropped a small white object on the shore, bowed to Luna, then Harry. His mouth quirked and he said something else to Luna, who laughed, smiled slyly and took Harry’s hand. The merman laughed his strange shrill giggle, which showed his pointed teeth, then he splashed back into the water, his legs becoming a powerful tail again.

“What did he say?” Harry asked. He was learning Mermish from Luna, but it was difficult and the dialect the merfolk spoke in the Black Lake was heavily accented.

“He asked if we were betrothed, and I said not yet.”

Harry pondered the difference between ‘not yet’ and ‘no’ while Luna went to pick up the object the merman had left. 

“Oh,” she said in a small voice.

Harry went to her, embraced her from behind and peered over her shoulder. She lifted her hands to give him a better look.

She held a small piece of ivory or bone, no longer than her little finger. It was untouched by its time in the lake, except for a small hole bored in it. A faint ghost of a twist or spiral showed on its surface. Harry thought he knew what it was.

“Is that…?”

“Alicorn,” she said at the same time he said, “unicorn horn.”

“Ah, yes, alicorn,” he said.

She turned it over and over in her hand, then suddenly she went to her pack. She tugged the leather drawstring out of one of the pockets and put it through the hole in the alicorn. Harry stood near her, watching quietly, his mind still twirling ‘not yet’ around in it.

She tied the ends of the cord together, and bound them with a permanent tying charm. He understood and lowered his head. She slid the necklace up and over, then tucked the cord under his hair at the back. He could feel the purity of the alicorn, the strength flowing from it.

“It’s like the opposite of the Horcrux,” he said finally. He took her hand and put it over the alicorn pendant.

“The Horcrux necklace sounds awful. I’m sorry you had to endure it.” She leaned forward and kissed him again, their hands clasped over the alicorn.

When they broke apart, Harry sat first, then Luna.

“Did you really mean ‘not yet’?” he asked finally.

“I did,” she said, and turned to him.

Their eyes met and she locked him with her gaze.

“That’s where we’re heading, right?”

“I…I think so.”

She blinked at him. The moon reflected off her eyes, then disappeared when she blinked. When it came back, he was trapped in the reflection of it like two mirrors facing each other. The moon on the lake at his back and also in her eyes.

“I do love you, I want to be with you, I want to make this work,” his voice trembled.

“But…”

“No buts,” he said.

“I want to marry and have children; I think I want them with you.” He sighed long and low.

“Now the but,” she said.

“But I don’t know what I want to do. I know now I don’t want to be an Auror. I might want to play Quidditch. I might like teaching. Having to decide so soon is hard.”

“You don’t have to decide right away, you have a few more months. Talk to McGonagall, get her opinion, talk to Ron and Hermione.”

She kissed him lightly again.

“Whatever you decide, I’ll be here at Hogwarts for you. We can make it work here or from a distance.”

She poked him.

“You can Apparate to Hogsmeade on weekends and we can stay in a cottage there.”

He spread his hands like a marquee.

“Luna’s Love Nest,” he said. They could both hear the capital letters.

He tried to kiss her, but they were both laughing too hard and just bonked noses, which caused them to laugh even harder. Eventually, they stopped giggling, but they still held each other close.

“I’ll talk to McGonagall and Hermione tomorrow. But, you’re right, no matter what, we’ll make this work.”

He stood suddenly, pulled his wand and reached out to the reflection of the moon in the lake. He pulled and the reflection stretched like taffy, the light flowing up his wand. It swirled and formed into a slender golden ring with a small white-blue cabochon-cut stone mounted on it.

He took her left hand and slid the ring over her forefinger.

“A promise ring?” she asked, her voice shaking slightly. Harry grinned, you couldn’t easily shake her.

“A promise ring,” he said.

“Yes.”

“I didn’t ask anything.”

She held up the ring and turned it in the moonlight.

“The ring is the question,” she said finally.

“I guess you’re right,” he said.

He got down on a knee and took her hand again.

“Luna Lovegood, will you take my promise to ask for your hand in marriage at some point in the foreseeable future?”

Her long braying laugh carried over the lake and tears of laughter and joy flowed.

“Yes,” she said, still laughing.

She knelt by him and they embraced.

“You had that ring up your sleeve the whole time?” she asked around a laugh.

“Yeah,” he admitted, “but the light show was pretty, wasn’t it?”

She laughed again, then kissed him fiercely again.

From the water, the merfolk watched, just their head above water. On a hidden cue, they all dove at once, making hardly a splash.

“What was that?”

“Just my heart,” Luna said and put Harry’s hand over it.

[geekychild01-blog]

Top 5 Best Flagship Smartphones of 2023

As we approach the end of 2023, the smartphone market continues to evolve, offering a plethora of options for consumers seeking cutting-edge technology. Whether you're a tech enthusiast, a mobile professional, or someone who simply wants the best smartphone experience, this list has been carefully curated to guide you through the top 5 flagship smartphones of the year.

1. Samsung Galaxy S23 Ultra

Pros: - The most complete smartphone experience money can buy. - Reliable quad-camera setup, including a 200MP main sensor. - 256GB base storage, leading the competition. - Integrated S Pen stylus for enhanced functionality. Cons: - The phone can be unwieldy for some, especially with a case. - Fast charging is capped at 45W. - Pricier than most Android phones. Overview: The Samsung Galaxy S23 Ultra stands out with its immersive display, powerful camera system, and extensive feature set. With up to 1TB of storage, it caters to users who demand the best.

2. iPhone 15 Pro Max

Pros: - Lighter, more comfortable form factor. - Brighter screen for better outdoor use. - 5X zoom camera for high-quality shots. - A17 Pro chip for snappy performance. Cons: - Battery life could be longer. - Apple-branded cases need improvement. - Comes with a higher price tag. Overview: Apple's flagship iPhone 15 Pro Max impresses with its sleek design, advanced camera capabilities, and the A17 Pro chip, ensuring a seamless and responsive user experience.

3. Google Pixel 8 Pro

Pros: - Quality cameras all across the board. - Plenty of useful AI features. - 5,050mAh battery with LTPO display. - Competitive pricing compared to rivals. Cons: - Stock Android can feel too minimal. - Capped at 30W fast charging. - It's slightly more expensive than the previous model. Overview: Google's Pixel 8 Pro continues the tradition of exceptional camera performance, introducing AI-powered features that set it apart. The generous battery and vibrant display enhance the overall user experience.

4. OnePlus 11

Pros: - Snappy and smooth performance. - 100W fast charging (80W in the US). - Premium build quality for the price. - Competitive main camera for photos. Cons: - Storage and RAM configuration is limited. - No wireless charging. - Lacks an IP68 rating for water and dust resistance. Overview: The OnePlus 11 stands out with its remarkable fast-charging capabilities, delivering a full charge in just 30 minutes. A well-rounded flagship that keeps the bank intact.

5. Asus Zenfone 10

Pros: - A compact phone with easy pocketability. - Competitive pricing for the features offered. - Snapdragon 8 Gen 2 chipset for smooth performance. Cons: - Limited availability in certain regions. - Not as feature-rich as some competitors. - No standout innovations. Overview: The Asus Zenfone 10 caters to those who prefer a more compact device without compromising on performance. It strikes a balance between size and capability. In conclusion, choosing the right flagship smartphone depends on your preferences, priorities, and budget. Whether you lean towards the feature-rich Samsung Galaxy S23 Ultra, the seamless iOS experience of the iPhone 15 Pro Max, the camera-centric Google Pixel 8 Pro, the fast-charging prowess of the OnePlus 11, or the compact design of the Asus Zenfone 10, these devices represent the pinnacle of mobile technology in 2023. Consider your needs, explore the options, and make an informed decision to stay ahead in the world of smartphones. Read the full article

[parfumerievn]

Creed Silver Mountain Water - Your Must Have Item

Discover the refreshing allure of Creed Silver Mountain Water, an exquisite fragrance from the house of Creed, now available in HCM! 🌿 Float away from fatigue and immerse yourself in endless tea fields with Creed Silver Mountain Water! 🌿

Creed Silver Mountain Water is not just a unique scent; it's a true work of art. After days of living slowly and contemplating due to the Covid-19 pandemic, let your heart beat fast, vibrant, and exhilarating with Creed Silver Mountain from Parfumerie.

Overview of Creed Silver Mountain Water EDP, the Fresh and Vibrant Scent: Fragrance Family: Fresh Floral Gender: Unisex Recommended Age: 25 and above Year Launched: 1995 Concentration: Eau de Parfum (EDP) - Long-lasting fragrance for over 6 hours Style: Dynamic, Invigorating, Fresh

🎯 Top Notes: Bergamot, Mandarin Orange 🎯 Middle Notes: Green Tea, Blackcurrant 🎯 Base Notes: Galbanum, Musk, Sandalwood, Petitgrain Oil

The exhilarating aroma of Creed Silver Mountain Water EDP begins with a refreshing blend of Bergamot and Mandarin Orange, a perfect prelude to the unexpected shifts in the next layer. Green tea gracefully emerges, exuding an air of tranquility amidst the fresh and invigorating Swiss sky breeze. Blackcurrant adds a touch of juiciness, lending a soft and enchanting quality to the heart notes. Lastly, the sophisticated fusion of Musk, Sandalwood, and Petitgrain Oil creates an inviting essence, transporting you to a dreamy, ethereal realm of purity and coolness.

Elegant Design of the Authentic Bottle Inspired by Olivier Creed's love for skiing, the Silver Mountain Water bottle is designed to resemble a snow-covered mountain, adorned with a gleaming silver cap. It was crafted in 1995 by the hands of Olivier Creed himself.

Creed Silver Mountain Water Review Pros: Sensual, invigorating, and refined fragrance with good longevity, ideal for daily wear. Cons: The scent might lean towards masculine and may lose some of its appeal in colder weather.

Embrace an endless sensation of freshness with Creed Silver Mountain Water at Parfumerie! Don't hesitate; refresh your day with Creed Silver Mountain Water and experience the difference! - See details:

[theclaravita]

Lightfall Thoughts - Spoiler Heavy

So I've given the expansion a bunch of thought, played a bunch of the new stuff, done a bunch of testing, talked to a bunch of people, watched a bunch of videos... I have a list. It's a very depressing list. Filled with spoilers. And salt. Read at your own risk.

PROS

Strand is an absolute joy to play. I've only played on Warlock, but the general consensus that I'm seeing is that Strand is powerful, satisfying, and fun. The three things all subclasses should be.

Strand upgrade unlocks happen at a quick, satisfying pace. You can plan your build at the Pouka Pond, and Meditations drop really frequently, especially once you get to 1720+ and can actually start doing Terminal Overload for 100 per key. No bullshit questing requiring dead gamemodes. No strings, ironically enough.

Neomuna is gorgeous and full of lore references. As a lore junkie and devout watcher of My Name Is Byf, Neomuna is so fascinating and I see the history flowing out before me very clearly. You can see how the city is cradled by the rocky floating island it's on, how the cliffs around it are craggy and treacherous, and how the buildings are all very clearly Braytech/Ishtar Collective themed. The design is clearly inspired and thought-out: this city didn't pop into existence overnight and it feels like it.

The cutscenes are phenominally directed and cool. Almost all of the plot happens via gorgeously rendered cutscenes that had me leaning in and staring at my screen in awe. The events happening on-screen were baffling, terrifying, and made me acutely aware of the stakes. The deaths of the OG fireteam was... Chilling. And the Witness unnerved me in just the right way anytime they were present; even more so when Calus got his scolding for his failures.

The Loadout and Mod Systems are a godssend. I don't use the Loadout system nearly as much as I should... Which makes sense, seeing as I'm just above the soft cap for now. But the new Mods system is INSANE and lets me do disgusting things like INCREASE THE PASSIVE DAMAGE OF MY GJALLARHORN TO OVER 100K PER ROCKET. I've heard of people making builds that cause Winterbite to do over ONE MILLION DAMAGE. My current favorite casual build is orb spam with Osteo Striga + Necrotic Grip, then Kinetic Surge x2. Single projectiles are doing 3k-5k and it's ticking for 8k at times. It's FOUL in Terminal Overload and it carried me through the Classic Campaign.

The new Tower is great. Nothing else to say here; I like the tree and Cayde's memorial. The destroyed corner of the Tower was honestly jarring and pissing me off. I'm just that petty.

Vendor rankups are lightning fast. I'm already rank 30+ with Nimbus, rank 8 with the Vanguard, and I finally reset with Xur. I think I'm also around rank 10 with the War Table already, though I have no idea how; I think it grants EXP from Neomuna stuff too?

Nimbus.

CONS

So. Many. Bugs. I know it's said every update, but this feels like an open beta. The game's clearly done, but it needs polish. The amount of times I had graphical bugs during the amazing cutscenes really threw me out of the moment and undercut the gravity of those scenes. ("Osiris, I don't mean to interrupt my own training montage, but your robe seems to want to go back to Earth.") I've had a few game breaking bugs that I'll list here. - Player models turning invisible... Including my own, along with my weapons' sights and scopes as well. Every time it happens, it suddenly makes the game almost impossible to play. I can't see where I'm aiming when I ADS, there's no audio feedback from reloading or moving/jumping/gliding, and I never realized how much I relied on those audio cues while playing until they were gone. - The seasonal artifact keeps breaking. I've narrowed it down to the second column of perks for me, but not everyone is having this issue. If I unlock any of the mod authorizations, all of my perks stop activating -- including anti-Champion measures. - Commendations overview screen crashes my game. I've had it happen only once, but the fact that it happened at all is troubling. I've also heard of other people having this happen every time they open it, and Bungie has acknowledged it. It's still inexcusable that this wasn't caught. - Mods don't apply all the time. The new Mod system is great... When it works. Several times now, I've applied mods to test a buid and they just... Don't work. I thought I was misunderstanding their effects or something. Nope; sometimes you have to unequip and reequip mods to have their effects actually work. This specifically happens every time with the Empowered Finish mod, (I make sure I have no Armor Charge before trying, since it only grants a charge when you have none), and the Stacks On Stacks mod, (it regularly only grants a single Armor Charge unless I have two instances of the mod equipped).

Enemies are harder now, and we can't spam abilities as much... And the enemy placement did NOT change to accommodate this. If you're going to make an enemy one-shot with a clearly charged and obvious attack, MAYBE don't have FIVE OF THEM PERFECTLY POSITIONED TO BARRAGE ME NO MATTER WHERE I TAKE COVER. That shit worked when I had a Rift or Barricade every 45 seconds. I could weather it. I could huck a grenade over there and clear some space. But enemies are all sponges, they do an asston of damage, and I have NO FUCKING COVER. There's a BOSS-LEVEL HVT that's 1800+ that roams around IN THE SKY with two adds that follow it, similarly beefed up, THAT FLOAT DOWN INTO THE COVERED SPACES??? WHAT DO I DO AGAINST THAT??? I'M JUST TRYING TO DO A PATROL, MAN.

Lots and lots of kills credited to the Architects. I understand that you need a failsafe for when the player and enemy interact in an unexpected way... But RAGDOLLING MY GUARDIAN OUT OF THE MAP because an enemy GENTLY WALKED INTO ME is not valid. The most prevalent strategy I've seen deployed by minor enemies on Neomuna is crowding the player and pushing them into walls to death. Psions do it, War Beasts do it, Goblins do it. They just dash/run/teleport into you and push you around. Oh, got a Rift there? SEVEN WARBEASTS ALL ATTACKING YOU AT ONCE, DOING NO DAMAGE BECAUSE THEY'RE PUSHING EACH OTHER OUT OF THE WAY AND OOPS YOU'RE IN A WALL AND ARE CATAPULTED OUT OF THE MAP. WOE BE UPON YE, LIGHTBEARER.

Walls are not obstacles to enemies... And empty space is not a passage for players. The amount of times I've been killed by a Thresher from across the map, with multiple walls between me and it... Or better yet, getting headshot by a Hobgoblin that is glitched out of the map, on top of a building, behind an invisible barrier it can SHOOT THROUGH, when I'm literally UNDERGROUND. Or when the Tormenter just fuses with a wall, is nowhere near me, and somehow grapples me? DARK HARVEST, LIGHTBEARER. EAT SHIT. IT DEFIES SPACE AND TIME. Additionally, I've shot Gjallarhorn rockets into OPEN AIR, NOWHERE NEAR AN OBSTACLE, and it blew up in my face. I tested it afterward: if you stand in the very middle of the Zephyr Concourse (with the spinny gyroscope structure) and shoot out of the circle, there's a CHANCE that it will hit a wall that isn't there. It's one of the spinny things. At some point, they desync from the graphic and it blocks your path in midair. I tested it further: I was able to reliably get physics-killed by "nothing" by jumping when I knew it would be there based on previous cycles. I'd been in the area for four hours farming Terminal Overload (before I got a key, sadly), so maybe it just desyncs over time? Still stupid.

The open world is boring and unfun to traverse. It looks pretty. I appreciate the little lore references. But FUCK ME RUNNING it's a chore to traverse. There aren't enough grapple points for Strand, and the ones that are there serve no purpose. There's still annoying as fuck deathplanes and invisible barriers, sometimes RIGHT NEXT TO a grapple point, CLEARLY SET UP FOR ME TO JUMP UP ON TOP OF THAT BUILDING, but if I do I die or bounce out. There's too much ground clutter, too few sweeping avenues, too many bottomless pits, too few ledges to jump down from. THEY LITERALLY SHOWED A HUNTER DIVING OFF A BUILDING IN THE TRAILER. WHY CAN'T I FUCKING DO THAT. YOU LITERALLY SOLD THE FUCKING EXPANSION WITH THAT SHIT.

The rewards from Neomuna activities are boring. The new weapons are neat, and that's about it. I miss gathering materials and trading them in. Using materials for upgrades, and the implication that we were trading them into the vendors who would then CRAFT THEM INTO GEAR for us! That was dope! And using materials to unlock upgrades on my badass weapons as I used them... YEAH! Now it's all cores, prisms, shards, and glimmer. That's it. SNORE. And dropping a ton of Strand Meditations all at once has made what I THOUGHT was going to be a length grind into... Nothing. I'm already 3/4 of the way done. And I've only done 10 Terminal Overload runs. I have 900 meditations. I only need 1600 more to get all the fragments. Why even do it this way? I haven't even played Strand outside of the required times for quests. And I almost have the grind done. Just unlock everything out the gate or don't do this way at all. Another example of the game being stuck with "this is how we did it BEFORE..."

Everything being centered on cores now has put a MASSIVE strain on my stock of upgrade materials, and it's forcing me to CHOOSE: keep my gear up to the bleeding edge of my power level, or reshape my weapon I've leveled up and grinded with enhanced perks? Upgrade my armor, or shape a new weapon from the plentiful patterns I'm unlocking? Giving me assured progress on crafting patterns, letting me unlock new patterns quickly, and letting me do that with NEW WEAPONS that are SHINY and FUN? That's great! Love it! Locking me behind a grind of fucking enhancement cores to take advantage of these increased rates of unlock? Kinda makes me want to uninstall the game. Weapon shaping was such a cool system when it launched: you had to seek out the weapons that had the right perks so you can get the materials you need to craft weapons with those perks. Great! Then it got simplified: no more perk-specific mats. And now it's been stripped down fully: no mats at all. Now it's not worth it. I don't give a single royal FUCK about crafting these weapons, and I'm SO GLAD I reshaped my core loadout BEFORE Lightfall... Because I'm not doing it anymore. Congrats, Bungo; weapon shaping is no longer the most effective tactic... It's the least effective tactic. And with the ability to enhance perks on random roll weapons coming, WHAT THE FUCK WAS THE FUCKING GODSDAMNED FUCKING POINT OF ADDING THE WEAPON CRAFTING SYSTEM OTHER THAN TO SELL WITCH QUEEN??? SERIOUSLY??? JUST FUCKING REMOVE IT ALREADY, THEN.

And now for the worst part. I was going to write up a huge wall of text outlining my problems with the lore. I was going to go into detail, with references and pictures and shit. But my mental health would not stay in the "I'm okay" zone for long if I did that. This shit absolutely makes my blood boil. Instead of breaking down every single gripe I have, I'm going to make another list. I'm not going to spend 10,000+ characters describing why this shit sucks. I'm going to keep each gribe short and sweet. Well, more sour. Anyway.

THE LORE

The Veil is not a fully-realized concept. I think they had a cool idea for how it would look and then didn't know how to progress from there. It's clearly an eyeball, right? I'm not nuts for thinking that? It's never referred to that way. "Roots" they called them. THEY'RE FUCKING VEINS. THAT'S AN OPTIC NERVE. GHOST. YOU'RE A FLOATING EYEBALL. HOW DID YOU NOT SEE THE SIMILARITY.

People talk about the Veil as if they know what it is. They don't. Why was the dialogue written as if it was understood? It verly clearly isn't, based on the post-game quests. And now there's not threat right? Why don't we go study it? The way is open.

The Veil was unveiled (wink) during the final chapter of the third act. We had no time to really come to terms with it as an object. And now it's hidden away in "you already did this quest" land forever. They talk about it a bit in the post-game quests, but it's almost immediately just shoved aside for "ROHAN'S LEGACY".

Calus was a terrible character and showed no development at all. I expected him to be either a chillingly calculated new kind of evil or fully batshit insane. He's still the snarky, irreverent snob that he's always been. He's just gold-plated now. Also his combat style is just "Colossus meets Caretaker" followed by "he's just a fucking Gladiator". I died more from him pushing me off the edge of the platform than his attacks. Pathetic.

The Witness was chilling and terrifyingly powerful: perfect for a new main antagonist. They killed an entire swathe of Guardians with a flick of their finger. I want to fight them. We do not even interact with them. They then fucked off into the Kaleidoscope Dimension of Triangles. "We can't follow it." Fuck you, I'm gonna try.

I didn't even blink when Rohan died. Not only did I expect it, I called exactly how he would die sacrificing himself because other people fucked up. He was a boring character with a boring end. His legacy is one of mediocrity.

We literally just call it capital-S "Strand" with no ceremony or explanation. It just comes out of Ghost's mouth. I did all the side dialogue stuff, talked to every NPC between each quest. It is never referred to as Strand except when Ghost randomly calls it that. This is minor, but it is a plot hole that triggers my writer's instinct. It needs to be explained. "This power... It's like strings... Ribbons... Strands... Strand!" That's all I wanted.

Stasis spent way too much time introducing the concept and feeding it to us a little at a time. Strand had no introduction, we literally find it randomly in the second mission, instantly play with it, and then randomly master it half-way through the story... But DON'T unlock it as a power? The training montage was cool and funny. Watching my Warlock unmaker herself with cosmic strings got a chuckle out of me. Just really wish Osiris's feathers hadn't been reaching for infinity during that cutscene.

Why and how was Callus able to just shout a hole through all of the Veil's defenses, all the way down to the actual fucking VAULT IT'S CONTAINED IN, but then uses a gun and swords to fight us? He should be able to just... Shout our Ghost apart, right? He can just will a goblet into being with his mind from raw ore, but he can't have a Tormentor grab us so he can crush our Ghost? I can apparently crush a Ghost with my bare hand, (Lucent Hive taught me that), but Callus can't? How was he powerful enough to vocally drill to the core of the planet, but impotent enough that I killed him with a sword?

"The Traveler is gone..." What? No it isn't. It just has aetherpunk-puke hole disorder. We still have the Light, right? So the Traveler isn't GONE... Why is everyone saying it's gone? We can see it from the HELM! The Witness and all the Pyramid ships are gone, though. That's nice. The Traveler is still clearly there. WHY DOES EVERYONE THINK IT'S GONE???

Nezerec? Really? He had no interactions with the Vex that we know of. And he's in the Vex Network? Really? Kind of a blind left hook there, Bungie. And if he betrayed the Witness, why is he still so evil? Is the implication that "Disciple of the Witness" isn't the ultimate way to be evil? That Nezerec is MORE evil? I don't understand. And knowing this game, I never will.

No interactions with Poukas to help us unlock Strand? Except the implied help we get at the Pouka Pond? Not even a cutscene showing that that's how we're doing it? Just walk up and "here's your shit, now go farm currency".

So many glaring issues I saw in the space battle cutscenes... Why was the Traveler's light beam completely ineffective against the Witness? And why did the Witness get a vision when it touched the Traveler? And why was it of Neptune specifically? And how was the HELM hit by the huge Pyramid ship shockwaves when it was clearly on the opposite side of the battle? Did our entire fleet get annihilated by that attack? What about Callus's ships? Why weren't they destroyed? That entire scene was so jarring and cluttered and had so many continuity issues and inconsistencies. It was cool in the trailers, but we literally saw the entire scene from beginning to end before the launch. It was clearly cut to be trailer fodder and that's really it.

Where the fuck is Xivu Arath and the Hive during all of this? No tombships, no Bladed Terrace... Isn't this battle enough of a clarion call to her that Xivu Arath can use it to call forth her forces from the Ascendant Plane? What about the war on Neptune? WHY IS THE HIVE GOD OF WAR NOT PRESENT FOR THE WAR TO END ALL WARS???

The seasonal story... Why are the Cabal taking prisoners at all? Isn't the entire purpose to destroy us? And why are they kept 5 at a time in a giant Pyramid complex with a single cage in the middle of a huge temple-like room? Are they to be sacrificed? And who are these people anyway? They look like civilians, but Amanda was with them... Were they pilots? Are they Guardians? If not, why were they in the space battle? How did they survive an attack that clearly decimated our entire fleet? Why did they crash on the EDZ?

I have more, but my computer is lagging from how long this post has become. I also need to eat breakfast. I've not slept in 24 hours and now I have a long day ahead of me to reset my sleep schedule.

I regret buying this expansion. I'm not going to whine and bitch about refunding. I made the choice to trust Bungo with my money and I got what I paid for. The fact that what I paid for was apparently a pile of shit is irrelevant. I really hope the seasons to come save this game. But I stand with what My Name Is Byf said: this game is now firmly in the category of "I cannot recommend it". Save your money; don't get Lightfall if you haven't already. Unless you really want to spend $60 for a new subclass. The best parts of this expansion for the most part are available for free.

My heart is breaking for this game... Here's hoping it redeems itself.

[oh-ranpo]

shoto who gets nervous for your first date.

shoto who spends over an hour looking over every outfit he has and struggling to decide what he should wear because he really wants to impress you.

shoto who fidgets with his sleeves, rolling them up and them pulling him down as he huffs out a breath of air in frustration because he has no idea what he’s doing.

shoto who stares at the clock and wonders when he should leave so he wouldn’t show up at your door too early.

shoto who makes it a point to stop at a florist on his way to pick up a bouquet of flowers that he knows are your favorite.

shoto who has made reservations at one of the nicest restaurants in town (this being the one time he purposely used his reputation as a pro hero to get a last minute spot)

shoto whose heart feels like it’s going to beat out of his chest when he parks his car in the parking lot of your apartment complex.

shoto whose hands are shaking as he hits the elevator button for your floor as he grips the flower bundle tighter in his grasp.

shoto whose heart squeezes in his chest and who stutters out a greeting when you swing open your door with a bright, welcoming smile.

shoto whose only thought is, ‘God, they’re out of my league’, when you invite him inside.

shoto who blushes profusely when you thank him for the flowers and immediately go to find a vase for them.

shoto who doesn’t know what to say when you tell him how handsome he looks in the outfit he picked out.

shoto who doesn’t know what to do with his hands as you walk to his car together so he simply shoves them in his pocket so you can’t see them still shaking.

shoto who wants to hold your hand in the car but is petrified to make the first move so he leaves it on the gear shift between you.

shoto who is sure that he is woefully unprepared for this whole dating thing because he has no idea what to say in the presence of someone as interesting and wonderful as you.

shoto who feels like he could combust when you tell him how handsome he looks for the second time that night.

shoto who manages to stutter out how stunning you look in your outfit as well, causing the most beautiful smile in response.

shoto who feels himself warm up after the appetizers are brought out because you keep asking him open ended questions to keep the conversation going where he lacks the skill.

shoto who can’t stop staring at your eyes and your lips where your perfect smile remains the same.

shoto who is surprised at how easy you make this whole entire night for him, despite how nervous he is to make a good impression.

shoto whose entire body warms when your hand brushes his on the way back out to the car.

shoto who hates the fact that the drive back to your apartment is so short meaning your night is coming to an end.

shoto who finally reaches out for you as he walks you to the elevator, his pinky wrapping around yours in the most delicate fashion.

shoto who can’t believe his luck when you fully take hold of his hand and pull him a little bit closer.

shoto who fights with himself over whether he should go for a goodnight kiss.

shoto who is sure that he’s falling fast when you lean in and gently kiss his cheek when he drops you off at your door.

shoto who can say nothing but yes when you invite him inside for a night cap.

shoto who looks forward to your second date, and every other date to come, even though he still finds himself excited and still very nervous, for every one.