It’s A Lie
Pairing: Max Verstappen x wife!Reader
Warnings: Cursing, Medical talk, C#ncer, hospital, ANGST, etc.
A/N: Did I write this in an hour? Yep, since that race was…not the best, decided to make you actually feel things
Max had 3 top moments in his life. The 3rd was getting called up to drive for Red Bull. 2nd was winning his first World Driver's Championship. The 1st was a day he'll never forget, which was marrying you. It was a day filled with joy and tears. Max never thought you'd agree to marry him. When he was ready to ask, he thought about puking for fear of you saying no.
But you said yes with a shake of your head and tears falling. Max couldn't control his emotions as he cried and hugged you close. The ring was wholly forgotten at the moment. No pictures were taken in a small private ceremony with the drivers and others. Just a memory for you and everyone else.
Max snuck one picture of the wedding. He tasked Daniel with getting a Polaroid picture of your first kiss as a couple. Max kept the picture in his wallet and looked before every race. The two of you were perfect together. With his harsh temper on the track, he was calm and soft at home. The roles switched between you two. You were the harsh-tempered one at home.
Max thought you hung the moon. He was so damn in love with you. Even considered retiring now just so the both of you could start a family. You laughed and kissed him. Telling him to enjoy his youth and speed. He nodded and pulled you closer, talking about everything and anything.
He knew you better than you did, so when he noticed your slight change in sleep, he thought something was wrong.
"Max, stop. I've been working slightly longer hours. I'm just catching up on some sleep." You laugh, fixing your usual coffee while your husband grimaces. "Snoepje, this isn't normal for you. Please just rest for the day." (little candy) Max pleads, but you just groan and slam your mug down. "Max, baby, I'm okay. I slept a little bit past my alarm." Max shakes his head and pulls his hair slightly. "Try 5 hours. It's the afternoon." He sighs, and you cock your head to the side. "What?" You spin and see the time. It wasn't 9 in the morning, but almost 1 in the afternoon.
You usually woke around 6 or 7 in the morning to jog with Max, but this time. You slept well over your standard time. Maybe something was wrong. You didn't feel sick, perhaps just tired, but that was it. "Okay, so I was exhausted." You joke, yet your husband's stone face isn't in the mood for joking.
"Okay, okay." You give up, knowing you wouldn't win this one, and email your boss saying you wouldn't be coming in. Your boss didn't have a problem with you taking the day off as you were always working.
Max was already planning a vacation for both of you, wanting to take advantage of this. "Max, no. Come lay down with me." Giving your best puppy dog eyes, Max tries hard not to ignore the nagging voice in the back of his mind. "Snoepje, maybe go to the doctor." He pleads to move to lie on top of you, placing his head on your stomach. Closing his eyes, he listens to the soft thumps of your heartbeat before a thought comes to mind. "Wait? Could you be pregnant?" Sitting up fast, you choke on a laugh at his blinding happiness.
"No, Max. I finished my period a few days ago." You sigh, closing your eyes again, and Max nods. "Maybe that's it. Your hormones are balancing back out, and you're tired." Humming in agreement, knowing he was convincing himself that everything was okay. "Yes, Max. Now lay down, please." You beg your hyperactive puppy of a husband. Max smiles and lies down, forgetting all about it.
It wasn't till another 6 months when Max noticed you weren't the same self. This time you joined him for a race, as he was keen on keeping you close to ensure everything was okay. Laughing with Max, Christian, and Adrian, you felt lightheaded but waved it off.
"Oh god, Y/n." Christian noticed it first, pulling Max's attention to see the small line of cherry red fall from your nose. "Snoepje!" Ge grabs a clean rag and pushes it to your nose, making you groan from the severe pressure. "Max, not so hard." You wheeze, unable to breathe, which has Max easing the tension. "Why is your nose bleeding?" Eyes wild with concern which have you giggling.
"Max, it's the pressure change in the climate. It happened to me all the time as a kid. "It'll stop soon. See?" Pulling the rag away, you dab your nose and show it isn't bleeding any more. Max sighs and knocks his forehead with yours, smiling like a fool from his freak-out. "Are you okay?" He whispers, watching Adrian and Christian back off, leaving the two of you alone. "Of course." You smile, lying to him, not wanting to tell him about you being lightheaded.
"You promise?" Vulnerability all over him, hating when you lied to him or not telling him there was a problem. "Max. I promise you. I'm okay." You whisper and lean up, kissing your husband on the lips and then his ring. "Now, go win, and maybe I'll show you just how okay I am." You giggle and reach down, grabbing him, which has him shiver and pull away. Laughing, he nods and goes to win the race.
After 2 months, you started to notice a severe problem. There was indeed something wrong. Those nosebleeds and being lightheaded became more frequent because Max told the team he couldn't race one weekend and stay home with you. After fighting, he was away for a race, and you were in the doctor's office. Getting the news of what was wrong with you was received with a smile and a nod leaving to call Max.
"Anemic? That's fucking it?" Max snaps over the phone while you fix your tea, something to help calm your nerves. "Anemia, yes, that's what the doctor said." Closing your eyes, you wait for the room's spinning to fade. "No. No. That doctor is fucking stupid. There is no way with the bloody noses and you almost fainting anytime you move; it can't just be fucking ANEMIA!" In the end, he's yelling. In the background, you hear JP telling Max to go somewhere else.
"Max, they said I have severe anemia and just need to change my diet and take some pretty hefty iron supplements." You sip your tea and lie on the couch, exhaustion settling deep into your bones. "I'm coming home, fuck this race." He curses more in Dutch, refusing to be away from you like this. "Baby, don't. This is a huge race for you and Red Bull. I'm fine, okay? Chrissy is coming over later to cook. So I won't be alone." Chrissy being your maid and chief, was like a second mother. "Y/n, I'm not fighting this. I must be home with you, not driving some metal around circles. You're more important." He spits, hearing hurried rustling, and you take deep breaths to control your temper.
"Max Emilian Verstappen! Don't you fucking come home! If you do, I'll divorce you." You snap, tired of him freaking out over your health. Silence is met before Max chuckles. "Then we're getting a divorce. I'm coming home." Max hangs up, and you sigh, giving up.
"Y/n? Darling? It's me." You wake to Chrissy yelling and walking into the living room and stop seeing your state. "Let's take a shower and get some color in you. Before Max sees." Chrissy knew the truth and was helping you. It ate at you every day, but you wanted to live an everyday life as much as possible.
"He's on the way home." You whisper, Chrissy nodding, helping you to the shower.
"Y/N! Chrissy!" Max's voice booms through the house, and it meets with laughter. Heading to the kitchen, and sees you smiling and laughing. You look healthy and happy. Color blushed your skin and saw life back in you; maybe it was just anemia.
"Snoepje." You turn and smile at him widely. "Guess we're getting that divorce, hmm?" You playfully push him, but Max grabs your wrist and yanks you into his chest. You hide your pain and wrap your arms around his waist. "We'll get a divorce when I die." He jokes, kissing the top of your head before leaning over and kissing Chrissy's temple. He mouths a thank you, and Chrissy smiles and returns to cooking. Max stayed away from the track for almost 3 months.
His first weekend back and winning, he'll never forget getting that phone call after the race, thinking it was you congratulating him. Except he's met with Chrissy crying, loud beeps in the back, hurried shouts, and Chrissy telling Max to come home now. Rushing home, he goes to the hospital, breaking every law in history to get to you. Max was still in his race suit. That's how fucking scared he was.
"Chrissy!" Seeing her, he rushes to her as she cries softly, shaking her head. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." She sobs, pulling away from Max. "What are you sorry about? Chrissy? What's going on?" Max yells as Chrissy shakes her head and rushes out, unable to handle seeing him fall apart.
"Will someone tell me what the FUCK IS GOING ON!" He roars, panic pumping through his veins as a nurse rushes to his side. "Mr. Verstappen, we need you to lower your voice." The nurse speaks in a soft tone leading him to a room.
Pushing the door open, Max sobs softly, seeing your state. A shell of yourself lay on the bed. How could you come to this state before him? Thin, so very thin, hair dull and stringy. How could he have missed this? Why didn't he see this? He was home; what did he miss? He moves to your side, lifts up your hand, and wails behind his hand so he doesn't wake you.
"Late-stage glioblastoma. Shame we caught it so late. Nothing we can do now. She signed a DNR." A nurse sighs, checking your vitals, and Max lifts his head. "What? What's a glioblastoma, a fucking DNR? What's going on?" The nurse turns, and her eyes widen, seeing the confused look on his face.
"Let me get the doctor." Rushing out of the room, an older man with a pristine white coat walks in and closes the door. He moves around silently and takes his jacket off.
"They tell me you are unaware of what is going on with your wife." his voice was soft but static like he was even having a hard time doing this. "She has severe anemia. Why are they saying she has something called glioblas-glioblastoma and signed a DNR. What the fuck is a DNR?" Max's foot bounces, holding your hand, praying you open your eyes.
"Glioblastoma is a form of brain cancer. It's uncurable. Your wife is in the late stages. Meaning treatment will not help. I diagnosed her a little over a year ago. Treatment was working, but......sadly I told her not too long ago we couldn't do anything else." Taking a deep breath, the doctor continues. "A DNR means Do Not Resucitate. When her heart rate stops, we can't perform life-saving measures. Mr. Verstappen...I'm so very sorry."
Max laughs and shakes his head, having heard nothing after being told it was cancer. It was static around him. You have been dying this entire time and never once told him. How could this have happened?
"I was home. I took time off, and she was dying before me; how could I not see this?" He asks, not wanting an answerback. "I'll leave you be." The doctor whispers and leaves as Max moves closer, burying his head into your stomach and crying. "How could you do this?" He sobs.
"I'm sorry." He yanks away and sees you awake, a soft smile gracing your lips. "Why? I would've retired. I would've stayed by your side the entire time. We could've done so many things together. Why?!" He yells, and you just move your hand cupping his face.
"And have you watched me die? Max, I couldn't handle that." You whisper, but your husband just shakes his head. "I hate you." He snaps like a child but regrets it when it leaves his mouth. "That's okay. I hate myself too." You whisper and wince in pain, hitting a small red button, and Max watches you relax when the medicine hits.
"Promise me something?" You ask as beeps fill the room, Max becoming aware again of everything. "Anything." He whimpers, pulling you into him. "Love again." Kissing his hand that cups your cheek, Max shakes his head no.
"Yes. You'll find someone you love, and I want you to remember I sent them to you for a reason. Don't push them away, Max. Cherish them." You whisper, making Max sob all over again, and he gathers you in his arms like a child.
"I love you." He whimpers, the beeping slowing as he just holds you, the only sound of the slow beeping, but soon, even that was gone.