#forced proximity finger touches and gazing longingly at each other

[bearlytolerant]

Why did I choose to write a slow burn?

To cause the yearning within myself.

[imnotasuperhero]

Tell me you still want me (I’ve been fucking lonely)

Pairing: Natasha Romanoff x Reader

Type: Fluff

Summary: Natasha knew she wanted more than this. And she hoped you did, too.

Or, another requested songdrabble that got out of hand.

Wordcount: 991

A/N: I promised some fluff after the “heartbreaking” previous fic, so yeah.. I hope you enjoy (:

She swore she was over you. And she was making a great work not crumbling in front of you. But when she saw you waiting at the café, she realized she's been fooling herself. 

A tsunami of emotions hit her witch such a force enough to send her to the past. And being honest, she didn't know if she wanted to be rescued. Much less when the smile she saw on your face gave her so much hope.

"You came," you stood up, greeting her.

"I promised you, didn't I?" She patted herself on the back mentally. But the feeling was short-lived.

"I already told you I'm sorry." She could see the guilt in your eyes. 

Oh, those eyes that used to held galaxies in them. Just for her.

"Thank you for coming," you gestured for her to sit.

"I had to," Natasha opted to look over the menu. She didn't want to lose herself in you, again.

The silence had extended for too long and she had to stop herself from fidgeting with the lid of her coffee.

Memories of you both in this same café, acting so differently, invaded her mind making it impossible to refrain from smiling longingly.

"Nat,"

"I'm sorry, what?" She looked up and her heart jumped at the way you were staring at her. 

"I miss you," you vowed, and oh, how she wanted to believe you.

"Why now?" The words surprised her too, but it was too late to stop now. 

"Why not before all this... whatever this is, started?" She gestured between you both.

"I wasn't ready," you muttered. You kept talking before she could counter you.

"Look, I know I screwed it up and you probably don't want me back in that way. But the fact that you came to see me means something is still alive."

Natasha allowed herself a moment. Despite the truth in your words, she wasn't keen on going through the pain again. Poor Wanda had suffered enough, too.

"You've hurt me,"

"And I regret my actions every day of my life," your hand finally moved to grab hers. You smiled when Natasha didn't reject it. 

How could she? How could she deny herself from your touches? 

Her eyes locked on yours. The rational part of her saying you were lying. But she only found regret and... Love. Pure utter love.

She'd recognize that gaze anywhere.

"How do I know you won't leave? I can't quit my job," Natasha asked. You knew she needed reassurance.

"I've grown." You promised. God, you've come a long way. "I'm better than my old self,"

You were glad you were sitting, for you felt yourself tremble under the redhead's stare. That same scrutinizing look she gave you whenever you tried to hide things from her.

"Please? Take me back?" You begged. 

"Let's go for a walk," she commanded. You found yourself standing up and following her. God knows you'd follow her till the end of the world.

You've been walking for the last few minutes in silence. Your heart going a mile per hour at the uncertainty of the situation. The only thing that kept that little flame alive was the fact that she didn't yeet you -which it won't be a rarity since she did it plenty of times whenever she let you train with her. 

"You'll have to win me back."

Your head whiplashed at her words, making you stop in your tracks. 

"Yes," you found yourself nodding at her words. Screw your pride. She was whort it.

***

The next few weeks, you found yourself spending more time with Natasha. You'd make plans to go hiking or on a variety of dates whenever your schedules matched. The feeling of normalcy becoming stronger with every passing moment.  

Sex wasn't the only thing that connected you both.  Not anymore. The random calls at night to get rid of those uncomfortable itches had morphed into long talks at night whenever one of you couldn't sleep. You'd talk about everything and nothing comforting each other until one of you fell asleep. The lingering touches were longer, now.

It was so easy to feel at home again. And you knew you had to nurture this for it to last.

"Of course you'd pick this place," Natasha smiled as you parked the car.

"It felt right," you grabbed the hand on your thing and kissed it before stepping out.

"It does." Natasha grabbed one of the bags and started walking toward your usual spot. "Hurry up," she called, making you laugh.

"Someone is excited," you trotted easily catching her. "If I knew, I'd brought you sooner." Your hand found hers. And your heart fluttered when she intertwined your fingers.

The path to your destination was silent, enjoying the chirping of the birds and basking in the warm sun shining above you. The clean air filling her lungs was gladly welcome.

"Thank you," Natasha spoke when you reached the -secluded- camping area. She didn't try to hide the happiness she felt.

"You're welcome," she was suddenly pulled back to you by your hand.

"Feeling confident. Aren't we?" She couldn't help the laugh that escaped her when you kissed her nose.

Your hands wrapped around her waist. "I am," your bright smile was contagious. 

"You should," she hugged you tightly, enjoying the proximity of your bodies.

"Can I kiss you?" You asked against her neck making her shiver. Your smirk told her you felt it.

Instead of answering, she locked your lips together in a soft kiss. She gave her whole in that kiss, and she knew you did too.

You see, sometimes you needed to allow yourself to grow for something to last. These last few years without each other help you with that. And Natasha couldn't be happier for accepting you back. 

Despite all the bumps your relationship faced -and the ones that are yet to come, she knew it was you. 

It's always been you.