#funny how he went from cool dude to another person I’m afraid to disappoint in one session

[floral-hex]

drove my mom to the ER.

[amandaklwrites]

Movie Review: The Mummy (1999)

Genre: Action, Adventure/Historical Fantasy

Rating: 10/10

Movie Review:

I LOVE THIS MOVIE.

I know this a fan favorite all around, and I totally understand now. I think I only watched this movie for the first time like two or three years ago, and I have to say, I’m very disappointed with myself for having waited so long. It is totally a movie that is 100% up my alley.

First of all, I love anything archaeology, especially when it comes to Egyptology. So, a movie set during the height of Egyptology (well honestly, all times are the height because they keep finding such cool, amazing stuff all the time), made in an Indiana Jones-style adventure of treasure hunting and curses. And all about ancient Egypt (even if it’s made up places and people)! So much my jam.

Now, the only complaint I have about this movie(s) is they do take some liberties with Egyptian mythology/beliefs that I didn’t totally like (more in the second movie, which I will do later). In this one, it mostly had to do with the flesh eating scarabs. In ancient Egypt, they revered and honored scarabs, they weren’t afraid of them because they ate flesh like that. I do understand that is for the plot of this film, so I let it slide. It is technically a fantasy after all.

So, time to just gush about this movie.

I love everything about this movie. The action and adventure, the humor. My god, the humor is so well done in this movie. Sometimes, I notice in action movies, they try to put humorous moments at the strangest times. But not this movie. Every funny moment is perfectly timed, and the actors do it all superbly.

Speaking of which, let me get to the actors and characters. Our main cast is absolutely fantastic. I love Rachel Weisz so, so much, and Evie Carnahan is the ultimate woman. I think I connect with her even more than the other female characters that I idolize. She loves Egyptology (go girl, you read those hieroglyphs!), she’s headstrong, she may be clumsy and silly, but it doesn’t make her anything less than. It actually all gives her strength. She’s young, but she has a strong mind and a strong will, and she knows who she is. And I think that’s what makes her so interesting to Rick O’Connell. (Let my briefly say, I had grown up with some Brendan Fraser films, and I did like him, but I never loved him as much as others. But I LOVE him in these movies. He’s so great at this character, and the funny reactions he has is so perfect). At first, you wouldn’t think that the two of these characters would like each other—Rick is the macho type, living on survival of his own instincts, and he likes the fight. But the fact that he sees Evie just as who she is and falls head over heels in love with her (I personally think he does so first, before she does) is the absolute cutest. He likes that she has her own mind, that she’s strong and confident and intelligent as all hell. So, when it comes to personalities, they’re opposites, but they work so well together. The brains and the brawn, so to speak. But they respect one another, they work as a team instead of trying to be stronger or smarter than the other. The only moments when they argue/bicker are silly things that I think most people that deeply love one another and respect each other actually do (my grandparents are like this, so I’ve witnessed it). I think their love story is one of the best honestly, as they balance one another, and they don’t try to make the other feel less than because of their differences. When I watch this movie, I always think about how I want to be Evie, and I want to find someone like Rick. I have a type, I think.

The others are great too. Oded Fehr as Ardeth Bay is a total badass and I think he’s one of the coolest people in the movie. He has a mysterious air about him and he can seriously work every weapon??? Like how amazing! John Hannah as Evie’s silly brother Jonathan is the comic relief of the film, but I love his relationship with his sister. He may be all for taking the riches, but he has a good heart deep down. Arnold Vosloo as Imhotep is a great villain, and I liked that he wanted to take the only role if his character could be straight. Other than the running away from the cat thing (which, actually has an interesting take on ancient Egypt culture when I think about. More on that later), he doesn’t have “funny moments.” He’s just a straight up, terrible villain with so much that it’s scary. And a quick little add on—Kevin J. O’Connor as Beni is just hilarious. He’s such a little weasel and I love to hate him.

Earlier, I had commented on the little bit I didn’t like about the movie, which had to do with ancient Egyptian culture. Now, there are some things, though different from what I think ancient Egyptians meant, that I think had some interesting takes on that culture. Something to add real quick, I liked that they used a curse, even if there is really no connection between “the curses” Egyptologists have experienced. The ancient Egyptians did believe in spells, and I think curses to a degree, but there has been no proof of that actually happening. But I liked how this movie played with their idea of magic. Imhotep was a sorcerer, quite powerful, and he betrayed his King, so he was killed for it. And when he comes back, he’s pissed. I think that’s more of “the curse” than an actual curse because of opening a tomb. They brought back to life a really, really angry dude that happens to have so much power. A sorcerer that wants revenge on what happened to him and his lover, and he will take down the world with him. What he does reflects how angry he is, and he wants to punish everyone else. It’s really interesting. And the cat thing! I’m sure most people know that the ancient Egyptians loved and worshipped their cats. But I’ve learned that it went beyond that—there were actual rules that if anyone had hurt or killed a cat, they would be executed themselves. That’s how much they loved their cats. So, I think with the scene of Rick discovering that Imhotep “fears” cats is, though a funny moment to see him run away in fear, actually a comment on their culture. Imhotep would have known the danger for his soul if he killed a cat, so he would go in the opposite direction. He would get far, far away. So, though funny, I don’t think he was scared of the cat and ran away, he feared what would happen to him if he hurt the feline. Pretty interesting, how they did that, if that’s what they mean, I may have only interpreted it as such.

This movie is just so, so fun. The story is one that I love—an action adventure of these characters being plagued by an evil enemy and trying to fix everything. Evie, Rick, Ardeth, and Jonathan are great heroes, and I love seeing them team up. I love the world of Egypt, just the feel of it. Though I personally hate heat, I have such a strange fascination with endless sand, to watch it run across the land. I love the mummies, the story, the villain, the themes that they play with (and any treasure hunting movie, honestly). The love story is the best part of the movie, as it feels natural, it’s not so in your face until the very end—the subtle moments of Rick nervously giving her tools, Rick protecting her, checking her face, etc. There’s so much about this movie to absolutely love, and I do. I really, really love it.

It is one I can watch again and again, and never get tired of. Honestly.

[hellswolfie]

House of Hades review

From the Heroes of Olympus. 

THINGS I DIDN’T LIKE : 

- Jiper. I never liked this relationship, I don’t even understand their dynamic or why they like eachother so much, sometimes it just feels like it’s because they find eachother pretty and that’s it. Also they tend to bring the worst out of eachother, which could actually be interesting if it was done on purpose but since it’s not it’s just bad. By that mean I mean Piper charming up Jason when he so much as thinks about another girl who happens to have a crush on him. Her tendency to use her charm speak is really worrying at times, how she uses it on her friends and even boyfriend so casually like that’s mind control !!! And he thinks it’s “fair game” which NO it’s not it’s extremely messed up to be that insecure that you feel that you have to brainwash your boyfriend to make sure he doesn’t leave you. Ask Voldemort. Also there is the fact that Jason actually KNEW about Reyna’s feelings for him. I don’t blame him for not outright rejecting her because come on that’s an extremely awkward conversation to have, especially with someone you’re supposed to work with everyday to lead people. But like, I already thought he was an asshole because the first thing he said to Reyna when he came back after months of dissapearing was that he wanted to make his girlfriend visit New Rome. Now it just makes it worse. 

Frank’s physical change. It was just so unnecessary and...kind of send bad messages. What was so interesting about Frank was that he was NOT a stereotypical Ares kid, he even hated the idea of being one at first. Him being all chubby added a lot to his character and it’s really disappointing that now he’s super athletic and I’m so tired of the “he has to physically change and become more of a stereotypical hot dude to complete his arc” . 

Hazel’s magical powers. Look i wouldn’t say I HATE it but I just don’t see the point of it? It doesn’t add anything to her character, only powering up more even tho she was already far enough powered up already imo. I think maybe it would have been more interesting to give this arc to Piper since it’s in line with her Charm Speak. 

The lack of Nico x Leo. Yeah yeah I know it will never happen but at least one conversation between them could have been so interesting? Like this two are so alike in so many ways! They both have extreme self worth issues and see themselves at the outcasts. They both have a tendency to run away (Leo mentionned that in his first chapter in the lost hero) and hiding their feelings. They both lost their only family and have a lot of trauma. Also they both are real sweet boys inside even though they don’t like to show it too much (let’s not forget Nico was the only one who was nice to Hestia and Bob, and Leo really did something so kind for Frank there). So they could understand eachother like no one else could, but also bring eachother something because they have both different ways of coping with that : Leo is desperate to belong, being the joker and doing everything he can to be useful to the point he doesn’t think anyone would like him for him if he wasn’t all that so he kind of has to play a role in his mind, while Nico just withdrawns himself and rejects everyone around him. They could really balance eachother out. Like imagine their relationship development, going from dislike, Leo being creeped out by Nico and Nico finding his jokes annoying, but then they get to talk and realize they’re not so different and...I’m so frustrated we didn’t get that!!! (PS : if you know a fic where that happens during HoH please give me the link!!)

- It was too short to have 7 POV. Well actually, this is more of a compliment because that means I love the characters so much and I wanted to see more of them. But that almost means that each character didn’t have that much screen time in they POV which made their developemnt in there pretty rush. 

Coach Hedge. Look, I really liked him getting more depth with his girlfriend being pregnant and his dead mother but all along the book i couldn’t help but wonder...What is he good for? Why is he even here? I mean he’s supposed to be the protector right? But like, it’s always the kids (the KIDS) who have to take care of him and handle him so he doesn’t do anything stupid. So he’s supposed to be the protector but he never does anything useful, in fact he always finds a way to make the situation worse like when he makes Jason lose his sword because he wanted to beat up a giant turtle so bad. He never helps when it comes to plan because the only thing he says is that he wants to fight even though honestly he’s the weakest of them all. I mean maybe he’ll finally do something useful in the final book, who knows? I still liked knowing he’s the one who brough Clarisse to camp, though, makes so muchs sense...

THINGS I LIKED : 

- The POV characters. I loved seeing more of Frank, finally, when he was in the background in the last book, and I loved seeing his development and him being more and more of a leader. Of course I loved Percy, Annabeth and Leo that’s a given. Even though her new powers annoyed me, I still enjoyed Hazel’s POV because she’s still very interesting to follow and I love the way she thinks, she’s very clever. I also liked Piper’s chapter yeeeeaaaaahh !!! And same for Jason, FINALLY AFTER FOUR BOOKS I ACTUALLY LIKE HIM (because he finally has a personality) !!! This two can become very interesting once they stop being so wrapped up around eachother. Like Jason’s struggle between his Roman side and Greek side was really cool to follow, and Piper showing how badass she can be but always wanting to be more? Yes I like that ^^

- Friendships !!! Friendships !!! Finally !! Yeah I was glad this book focused a bit more on friendships than the last one. I loved the Jason x leo stuff, how Jason really seems to admire Leo and how he was the only who realized how sad Leo were after Calypse. Leo x Hazel finally became a friendship instead of the weird thing they had going on thanks god. Leo confectioning something to protect Frank’s staff was so adorable and kind of him like that’s my sweet boi !! I LOVE the potential of Jason x Nico and also maybe Frank x Nico. Piper crying and hugging Annabeth when they are reunited awwww !! And Piper and Hazel bonding over Hazel learning Piper how to fight and Piper helping her with her magic I really liked that  (even though I would have like it better if Rick would have showed it instead of just telling us about it). Even Frank and Hedge were pretty heartwarming. 

- The Tartarus plot. WOW. It was just...WOW. It was so well written from start to finish, i could feel the horror of this place and how it changed Annabeth and Percy (especially Percy) which was so interesting. Of course the Percabeth moments gave me life. And like...the monsters that give them curses when they die, Nyx, The Nice Titan and The Nice Giant, Tartarus himself...It was just all so good and hurt in the best of way. The “Bob says hello” went straight to my heart. Favorite part of the book. 

Caleo : Do i think they should have had more time to develop if Leo is supposed to be THAT in love? Yes. Do i think Nico x Leo would have been so much better and interesting and had so much more potential especially at a slow burn romance where they both become best friends and fall in love in this book but are to afraid to admit yet (again, please give me a link if you know a fic that does that)? Also yes. But I have to admit, they were hella cute. I liked their dynamic (we’re all sluts for ennemies to lovers, no?), and i get how Calypso can be good for Leo : she also has abandonment issues and they work very well together, she’s not afraid to tell him off and he really seems to have grown up after meeting her (and getting his first kiss, which again : hella cute). And I also see how he can be good for her : he’s not like the other Stereotypical Hero she met on her Island, she actually had to get to know him instead of falling in love instantly, and got more in touch into her more mischevious side which I liked to see. Also if he does come back to her (and I better hope he does because he deserves it), that could be an adorable scene and they could have their shop they talked about and...Yeah I like them. 

NICCOOOOOO : my baby death boy finally got more screen time and damn it was so good. Of course there was the Cupid Scene. I didn’t like how he was basically forced to come out but I still loved the intensity of this scene, and the revelation that he was in love with Percy and he hated himself because of that? My baby needs a hug (and while it hurt, it was also pretty funny in the end how Percy was so confused about Nico’s aptitude towards him, always and forever oblivious to when someone has a crush on him). But also that makes so much sense. His relationship with Jason? Loved it, loved how Jason gave him advice about opening up more to people (and I totally relate to Nico, I’d much rather raise the dead and hide in hell than doing that) while still being kind of scared of him but wanting to be supportive and seeing how this child fucking needs therapy !! I can’t wait for Nico to finally feel like he belongs (which he would have with Leo!!!!). Nico x Hazel has my heart, their dynamic is just so fucking sweet, like even though she doesn’t totally understands him because he still keeps her at arm lenghts, you can see she loves her brother so much and it’s clear it is mutual. Like forehead kiss my heart (forehead kisses are a weakness of mine) !!!! The scene of him and Frank sharing their interest about Mythomagic was so pure and broke my heart at the same time, I mean like Percy said he’s not that little kid insouciant kid anymore :(  (also props to Percy for not being an ass to him which doesn’t really happen often). Anyway I LOVED seeing more of him. He’s such a great and interesting character and i love him so much. Also of course, like always, he was a total badass and I have to asmit, even though I want him to belong, it was kind of amusing how this scrowny, pale and needy of sleep 14 years old terrified the all powerful demi gods on the ship (well ok he is the most powerful of them all but still). His vibe is just that good. But I really want him to have this someone who manages to make him slow down his walls, you know? (even if it’s not Leo snif). 

So that was it. I don’t know it that’s ineresting for anyone but I like to vent so ^^

My reviews for : 

The Lost Hero; Son of Neptune; the Mark of Athena

[verobatto]

Destiel Chronicles

Vol. XXXIV

It was a love story from the very beginning

I can see your pain...

(8x08/8x10/8x13)

Hello my friends!! This is another meta from my meta series. Today I'm gonna talk about how Dean starts to see in Cas something is odd, he sees him sad, and depressed, and he begins to be worried about him.

I want to say thank you to my wonderful friend here, @agusvedder , she made the gifs for this meta and discussed the episodes with me.

Castiel's sadness

Knowing Cas from season 7 was depressed, and then that he wanted to stay in Purgatory, gave us a sad idea about how Castiel was feeling.

We are going to talk first about episode 8x08 Hunter Heroici, Dabb's episode.

Cas starts to share more time with their human friends. But he is still kind of clueless about humans, and everything. He's literal with words and human's expression, and that had been the fluel for a lot of jokes in the show.

When Dean and Cas were talking in that gas station, Dean was questioning what Castiel would do now, because it seems he was kind of glued to them. He thought maybe now that they're back on the road, Cas would do the things he used to do, angel's stuffs. But no, he's still there with them. So he had to ask him...

So is evident, Cas don't want to talk about angels, or Heaven, or coming back to Heaven, he's afraid, and ashamed, and it mortifies him. He needs to avoid anything that hot to do with his past, so he decided to stay with his humans friends. And imitate them. Because he sees in Dean and Sam two good humans that help people.

DEAN: So what now? Move to Vermont, open up a charming B&B?

CASTIEL No. I still want – I still need to help people. So... [smiles] I'm gonna become a hunter.

Is so important the switch in the words here... He changed the WANT for the NEED. He needs to hel people. Because he needs to do it, to feel better with himself. To get better from his sadness.

Castiel tries too hard to be a good hunter, but his lack of "humanity" makes it difficult. That's why he fails in everything he tries to do

And there's a little foreshadow hidden in this piece of dialogue... Trying to decipher the case of the man who's heart jumped out of his chest.

SAM: So he stashes his car at the park across the street, meets Olivia there.

DEAN: His wife probably found out about it, and it broke her heart.

SAM: So she breaks his. Sounds witchy.

DEAN: Yes, it does. Guy was living a lie, and it came back to bite him in the ticker. But nice job on the bladder infection.

He broke her heart so she broke his.

If this isn't a a foreshadow for the incoming crypt scene and for the season 9 scene in which Dean kicked off Cas from the bunker, I don't know what it is...

He was living a lie, that's for sure foreshadowing the crypt scene, when Dean will realize what was happening with Castiel.

Let's jump to the big Destiel dialogue now...

CASTIEL Your father... Beautiful handwriting.

DEAN How you feeling, Cas?

CASTIEL I'm fine.

DEAN Well, I just – I – I know that when... I got puked out of Purgatory, it took me a few weeks to... find my sea legs.

CASTIEL I'm fine.

DEAN Don't get me wrong. I'm – I’m happy you're back. I'm – I’m freaking thrilled. It's just this whole mysterious-resurrection thing – it always has one mother of a downside.

Dean is trying to make Cas talk, because he's seeing Cas is avoiding Heaven's topic. And maybe he's trying to get to him, talking about that huge experience they had in Purgatory. Trying to empathize with the angel...

CASTIEL: [closes the journal] So, what do you want me to do?

DEAN: Maybe take a trip upstairs.

CASTIEL: To Heaven?

DEAN: Yeah, poke around, see if the God squad can't tell us how you got out.

CASTIEL: No.

Dean is still feeling there's some piece missing, he needs answers, but he can't see far more... Cas is in pain, and he will know again and right in this scene.

Dean goes for the normal way to look things... Of course, angels would kill Cas, but the truth is worst than that...

Kill himself? Dean is in shock. And Sam is there interrupting.

Cas saw a way out from that conversation, so he ran away towards Sam, but Dean is so in alarm about what Cas had just said, that he can even get up from the bed. And while his brother are talking, he gave a quick glance to Cas... He's worried...

And this episode already gave us a guy with a blue tie, jumping out of the building, commiting suicide.

Acting awkwardly around you

We are still in episode 8x08, I will point two weird attitudes coming from Dean...

The first one is the classis "I'll watch over you."

Is a simple, honest angelical offer to make. Angel watch over humanity. And why not watch over Dean? Why not if Cas is an angel and that's what angels supposed to do.

But Dean takes this as another kind of offer, it makes him uncomfortable, just thinking about Cas standing there, watching him sleep... Is so "creepy" but mostly... Gay.

So he snapped off that idea "That's not gonna happen," making that face that show discomfort, and some kind of stress. He's very conscious about the offer, because he's in love with Castiel.

Then... We had the old lady scene... I found a couple of good points...

OLD WOMAN: You are so pretty, Charles.

(...) DEAN notices an attractive female CARER walk by.

Why is this immediately pointed after a lady calling Castiel pretty? Because Dean is conscious about that too... Cas is pretty, and then a pretty Young lady passed by and Dean goes there. Yeah. No homo. Is just subtext.

CASTIEL: That's not my name.

OLD WOMAN: Oh! You look so much like my third husband.

I don't know if someone already pointed this in the fandom but... Cassie/Lisa... Are one two... And now Castiel is the third for Dean. 🤣🤣🤣

And this one here...

OLD WOMAN Oh, my diamonds, yes. I hid them there. [to CASTIEL] I'm sorry, Charles. I didn't trust you. You were quite the bounder.

Okay... So Charles/Castiel is the binder, this is a funny foreshadow about what Cas would do to Dean... He will break his heart.

Jumping now to episode 8x10 Turn and Frayed

Not mention the scene in which Castiel actually is watching over Dean, I want to talk about the exaggerated and awkward reaction from Dean when CAS is standing behind him, and he opens his laptop, with the "Busty Asian Beauties" on it...

Why is he reacting like that? If Cas is a dude, and the normal reaction between dudes would be just poker face maybe a joke or wherever, but no. He's in front of his crush, people! He's ashamed! He even covers the screen with his hand!! He looks back to see if Cas is watching. He's ashamed because he cares about what As would think. Because he is in love with him. Okay I will repeat this a lot of times during season 8...

And this whole episode here is a parallel to 5x03, Free to be you and me, we even had an intent of date!

And Dean is flirting again, and watching Castiel mouth, then touching his own lips, I mean... This is it. This was another date between them. A hunting date. The whole episode my dears.

Dean is also feeling proud when CAS requested the ingredients list Kevin was writing. Yeah, this is my handsome angel friend, nothing he can't get.

In this episode, Dean and Sam saw Castiel had killed Samandriel, suspecting there was something really bad going on with the way Cas was behaving.

Bi Dean exposition

Episode 8x13 Everybody hates Hitler, written by Edlund, is a big Bi Dean exposition.

Before we will be talking about that, I want to point here, this scene...

Dean is avoiding Sam's gaze, he is like playing with some books, because he needs to make that question as if that was nothing, just a bro, worried about his best bro, so, yeah...

But while he's doing that, is plenty obvious to the audience, he's trying so hard, and he's really worried, and he's ashamed for asking that. Because he was trying to contact Cas and he didn't answer his phone, so he's really, REALLY, worried, and struggling with Castiel's absence.

But now let's talk about how he's bi self was exposed when he met the rabbi's grandson.

You already recall the scene in the restaurant. The guy and Dean exchanged gazes, and the rabbi's grandson flirted with him.

And when Dean went to face him, he got very VERY flustered, and everything was awkward, and he even gave the guy a flirting gaze... Okay... He named that MY GAY THING.

Now... Why is Dean disappointed in this dialogue... (Also, pay attention to the symbolism and the parallel is hidden here...)

BEARDED YOUNG MAN The rabbi who was murdered, Isaac Bass – he was my grandfather. That's why we're here. When you guys started to follow up on his case, we started following you.

This is placed after the episode in which the guys met his grandfather, so this is a parallel to that episode, but also, what is about to coming, is a Destiel brokenheart parallel (the crypt scene)

DEAN So, wait. What you're saying is that you and me – we, uh, didn't have a moment?

You and me. YOU AND ME. Not YOU, JUST YOU HAD A MOMENT WITH ME. BUT YOU AND ME!

Because Dean had a moment there too... He thought they, together, had a moment. (Bi Dean alarm sounding).

RABBI BASS’ GRANDSON No, man. I was tailing you.

Now... The deception, and the foreshadownfor the broken heart...

Cas I thought we had something special, you and me, but it looks like it was just me feeling that way...

DEAN [to SAM] Told you I was being followed. He was my gay thing.

[to RABBI BASS’ GRANDSON] It was really good. You really had me there. It was very smooth.

Trying to remain cool... But he fooled him.

He will feel fooled by Castiel too.

Can I die now? Okay, after finish this, then I die.

To Conclude

Episode 8x08 showed us a depressed Castiel, thinking about suicide, not being able to come back to Heaven, and trying to stay with Dean and Sam, trying to be a hunter like them, because they're role models to him. And he NEEDS to keep helping people, he need to feel himself as a good person.

We had a worried Dean and and awkward behavior coming from him, with huge heartbroken (crypt scene) foreshadow everywhere.

Episode 8x13 was exppsitional for Bi!Dean, and it had a lot of elements that acted like parallels with MoL legacy and, again, the crypt scene.

I hope you like this one, see you in the next Chronicles.

Tagging @metafest @magnificent-winged-beast @emblue-sparks @weirddorkylittlediana @michyribeiro @whyjm @koshisekisen @legendary-destiel @a-bit-of-influence @thatwitchydestielfan @misha-moose-dean-burger-lover @lykanyouko @evvvissticante @savannadarkbaby @angelneedshunter @trickster-archangel @dea-stiel @poorreputation @bre95611 @thewolfathedoor @charlottemanchmal @neii3n @deathswaywardson @followyourenergy @dean-is-bi-till-i-die @hekatelilith-blog @avidbkwrm @anarchiana @mishka-the-angel-of-saturday @dickpuncher365 @vampyrosa @foxyroxe-art @authorsararayne @anonymoustitans @mybonsai1976 @love-neve-dies @wildligia @dustythewind @wayward-winchester67 @angelwithashotgunandtrenchcoat @trashblackrainbow @deeutdutdutdoh @destiel-is--endgame @destiel-shipper-11 @larrem88 @charmedbycastiel @ran-savant @little-crazy-misha-minion @samoosetheshipper

@shadows-and-padlocked-hearts @mishtho @dancingtuesdaymorning @nerditoutwithbooks @mikennacac73 @justmeand-myinsight @idontwantpeopletoknowmyname @tenshilover20

If you want to be tagged in this list, just let me know.

If you want to read the previous metas...

Links are right here: vol. XXXI, XXXII and XXXIII.

Buenos Aires, October 23rd 2019 6:20 PM

[anderfels]

I know you ask, but can I get those Fun Fact deets on Rafe Shepard?

Oh, definitely! :D 

Also, uh. This got... long. Especially the first question. I’m so sorry. I went down the tropes rabbit hole. 

Which tropes do they fit? Which archetypes? 

For the tropes (which I looked up on TV Tropes, lol), I feel like Rafe fits these pretty well: 

Affectionate Gesture to the Head: Rafe shows his affection towards his friends by patting their head (and ruffling their hair if they have any). None of them are safe. He will pat your head. 

Berserk Button: Doesn’t like it when people bring up Mindoir. 

Brutal Honesty: While not brutal brutal, he will tell you exactly how he’s feeling. No sugar-coating. He doesn’t do it to be mean, he’s doing it to help people improve, but, you know... when he’s busy listing people’s mistakes, they don’t always see it that way. 

Challenge Seeker: He constantly looks for ways to hone his skills, and sometimes bites off more than he can chew. He also gets a bit disappointed when something turns out to be easier than he thought it would be. 

Deadpan Snarker: He has a dry sense of humor. You know that Vine that’s like, “Dad, look, it’s the good kush!” and the dad responds, “It’s the Dollar Store, how good could it be?” That’s him. He’s the dad. 

Death Glare: He has a particularly effective one, or so he’s told. 

Did You Think I Can’t Feel?: Because he does display himself as the Cool, Level-Headed Guy, people tend to think he just... doesn’t have emotions? But he does.  Source: Dude, just trust me. 

Don’t You Dare Pity Me!: “Are you alr--” “If You Finish That Sentence I Will Not Be Happy.” 

Even the Guys Want Him: I mean... when you’re Commander Shepard... 

Genius Bruiser: He’s also good at things that don’t require punching! I swear!

Go Through Me: You’re hurting his companions over his dead body, baby! 

Good is Not Soft: He is a good guy, but he’s not above intentionally hurting others that he thinks deserve it, whether that’s verbally or physically. 

Hot-Blooded: Pours his all into everything he does. He survives things that shouldn’t be survivable because he’s too stubborn to die... and also willpower and skill, I guess. 

Nerves of Steel: He has seen Some Shit. 

Nice to the Waiter: His parents raised him to be respectful, thank you. 

Rapid-Fire “Shut Up!”: Are you trying to bring up something embarrassing he did in the past? “Shut up, shut up, shut up, shut up, shut up, shut up, shut--” Complete with him squeezing his eyes shut!

Screw the Rules, I’m Doing What’s Right!: “Rafael, you can’t--” “Lol ok *does it anyway*” 

Sore Loser: While he doesn’t outwardly express it (much), he does get upset over losing. You beat him in a card game? He says it was a good game and you did well, but I assure you, he is screaming/pouting on the inside. 

Sugar-and-Ice Personality (which is a fancier way of saying tsundere, I’m pretty sure): He seems aloof and stoic on the outside (especially at the beginning of ME1; by the time ME3 comes around, he’s looser and allows himself to show more emotions), but he really does want what’s best for people. He is like an egg... hard-seeming on the outside... but when you crack him open... he is Gooey. 

Thinking Tic: When he’s thinking, he tends to scratch underneath his jaw. 

As for archetypes, I feel like he’d be a mix of The Ruler (leadership skills, power, concern over being in control) and The Magician (strategy, knowledge, anger over not getting his way). 

Do they play an instruments? Sports? 

Rafael is not the most musically inclined person out there. Please don’t make him play the guitar. 

And he likes playing basketball! And table tennis, okay, that’s totally a sport. 

What are some items they always carry? 

An omni-tool, preferably by Ariake Technologies. Also: mints. You never know when you need fresh breath. And a baseball cap. Sometimes people recognize him and there are times where he’d rather not be. 

Other than that... he’s pretty simple, honestly. He doesn’t carry many things with him when he’s off-duty.

Do they collect anything? 

Model spaceships. A lot of model spaceships. 

He’s also said that he collects soap opera memorabilia before, but you know... with his deadpan sense of humor... no one knows if he’s joking or not and honestly they’re too afraid to ask. 

What position do they sleep in?

Curled up on his side. He has one hand under his pillow, gripping a knife. Remember: the man who sleeps with a machete is a fool every night but one. 

Which emoji would they use the most?

🙄

What languages do they speak? 

In the event he has no access to a translator, English, Mandarin Chinese, Tagalog, and Spanish are all languages he’s well-versed in. In Arabic, French, Brazilian Portuguese, and Swahili, he knows enough to tell civilians to get to safety or ask if they need help. Any others and he defers to another teammate.

He also learned some Khelish from Tali. 

What’s their favorite expletive? 

BOSH’TET. 

What’s their favorite candle scent? 

Pecan Pie Bites by Yankee Candle, next question. 

What songs remind you of them?

“Let Me Live / Let Me Die” by Des Rocs, “Higher” by The Score, “Fire” by Barns Courtney... “What’s Up Danger” by Blackway and Black Caviar. 

What animal would you say represents them? 

I’m not too sure, honestly. Maybe a lion? 

Where stereotypical high school clique would they fit into? 

Those jocks, but like... the Nice Jocks. They play Magic: The Gathering and call you “bro.” 

What would their favorite ride at an amusement park be? 

The fastest, tallest, scariest, windiest, and every other kind of -est rollercoaster there is. He will ride it 20 times and then insist on riding it 20 more. 

Do they believe in aliens? Ghosts? Reincarnation or something else?

Ofc, he believes in aliens (in the exist physically and in the encouraging “I believe in you, Grunt :)” way), but I think it would be really funny if he didn’t. 

Rafael, gesturing at who’s standing in front of him: I don’t know. They look like a human to me.  Garrus: Are you fucking kidding me. 

But in the other stuff... no to ghosts and no to reincarnation. 

He sort of believes in the afterlife? He’s not a spiritual person by any means, but it brings him comfort to think about how his parents are in a better place. He hopes that he’s making them proud. 

Do they follow any religions/gods? Do they celebrate holidays?

He’s not religious, but if a friend invites him to celebrate a holiday with him then he’d join. 

Which Deadly Sin do they most correspond to? Which Heavenly Virtue?

Oh, gosh, hm. 

For the Deadly Sin... I’m tempted to say wrath, he’s always got this little bit of rage bubbling underneath his skin. He teeters really close to the edge, and when someone, somehow manages to push him over, he’s volatile. It’s like... he doesn’t get angry easily, but he’s always ready to get angry. 

I have no idea if that makes sense lol.

For the Heavenly Virtue, diligence. He prides himself on a job well done and constantly pushes himself to improve. There’s a reason he’s an N7 and the first human Spectre. He accepts nothing less than the best from himself (and others, which goes hand in hand with his Brutal Honesty). 

If you had to choose one tarot card to represent them, which would it be?

Nine of Wands, possibly! From a cursory search (I know nothing about tarot, excuse me aksdjaklsd), it represents resilience, courage, and persistence when upright, and struggles, defensiveness, and (the use of) inner resources when reversed. 

I couldn’t find a card that made me think, “Oh, this is Rafael,” but that card was the closest! 

[lordeasriel]

I’m back with my impressions, from chapter 12-19. I was gonna include chapter 20 as well, but it’s an 1 hour long, and I’m getting forgetful already, so i’m keeping it out to include after. under the cut for spoilery reasons:

Giorgio Brabandt after telling lyra about the secret commonwealth:  “You don't look like you believe a word of this”. Lyra monkey side eye meme: "I do". She absolutely didn’t. LMAO

Olivier throwing the photo of the girls away after taking Lyra's face out of it, because "the girls were too English to be attractive" what a garbage can of a man lmao he is so irritating, I cannot deal with that.

Malcolm is so sly while interrogating the murder associate dude lmaooo I love how he perceives Oakley Street members: "so liberal and tolerant, so civilised, and the organization they embodied" That was so beautiful and so, idk, romantic perhaps? Which is completely out of character for me to enjoy, but I did.

Did they turn the mausoleum into an archive? I wonder if I understood that correctly. That is a weird choice for an archive.

The fact Oakley Street is not as strong, but in fact, it is actually weaker than it was before oh no That was a sad blow. I think they’re doing everything wrong. They should be worried about recruiting, not marching into a war with the Magisterium. I love Godwin, she is powerful, reasonable, imperative, she reeks of wisdom and I love it.

Pan’s chapter where is looking for a boat to board, it made me realise Lyra’s world would be much cooler if daemons could roam free. He notes that he doesnt have the opportunity to speak and ask questions, because daemons without their people are something terrible. But if that was more widely accepted, Pan would have less trouble than he is actually having.

Pope Calvin was a dumbass, he turned an already bad is institution into a horrible corporation LMAO and it keeps on getting worse. I loved the conference so much. I think it embodies nicely how I envision them, as a nest of vipers; big Galactic Senate vibes to be very honest.

Speaking of Star Wars references, Marcel makes me think of Palpatine, all that cunning, all that slyness or whatever. He really does Marisa’s justice in some ways, but he is indeed too cautious.

His modesty speech with the woman/nun was... awful, in some ways. As in he is so blatantly manipulating things it feels too good to be true. I do like him, hell I’m attracted to him LMAO somewhere in the Abyss, Asriel is heavily disappointed with me. I am sorry, I still love you, I just find trashy men attractive, Asriel.

Olivier is irritating, but cunning, and made I’m projecting, but oh fuck, he is too much of a millennial for my taste. I think he is too cliche, sulking, brooding young man; it was fun on the first two appearances, but now it’s getting tiresome the way he is described as a persistent, clever man. It feels force, I don’t know. I’d rather he be a woman of different qualities, it would be much more interesting for me.

Marisa is Marcel’s sister, and she’s supposed to be his older sister as Olivier’s daemon tells him. I loved that, although it’s a little odd. I like the idea that they were twins better, but oh well. I wish we could have more women like her in the Magisterium’s arc, because it’s mentioned she was a prominent force. I love that, it does her so much justice.

Their mother is the stuff of nightmares LMAO but Marcel is so nasty to her, it makes me feel that the whole family has issues. I do wonder if Marisa changed her name to Van Zee, or if they changed theirs to Delamere. I prefer van zee to be very honest.

Lyra reminding herself of the time when she could intimidate gyptian boys, it was a neat display of her self assurance and I wish there were more parallels between her and Marisa because a lot of the things she treasure about her, things she now lacks, are things I think come from Marisa.

Coram telling Lyra to let Will go. Well, fucking finally, a person with a good sense. I thought she was finally gonna stop with that, but oh no, another bunch of paragraphs of whining. I can’t.

And Coram being so fragile.... I’m Sad.

“Was the universe alive or dead?” That was a horrible question that left me heavy breathing for five minutes. I too have been questioning things like these and I love the pain in Lyra’s exstential crisis.

Marcel enjoying Olivier’s discomfort: that was so funny, Marcel is so bad, but he does sometimes feel like overly mean for no reason and I wish, I don’t know, I kinda hoped that Marisa’s family would be normal, or not so nasty.

My favourite part so far, a summary: “What do you know about Marcel? Well, he is not married and we think he ain't gay.” The fact people don’t care about him because he makes himself uninteresting to tabloids is... a skill.

“Knowledge is like water it always finds gaps to leak through” That was, I don’t know, powerful? Touching? Something I relate to heavily and that I will not elaborate as of now.

Tatiana Asrielnovna 😭😭😭😭 That made me sad. The fact she thinks of Asriel for this things, and then I noticed, how Asriel comes first, and how she thinks so little of Marisa and that hurts.

Malcolm pov is smooth and entertaining and much more action-driven than Hannah's was, for many different reasons, including the fact that she was more scholar than spy, in comparison to Malcolm’s more physical disposition. I like him a lot. He is charismatic and sweet and very, very clever. But he still makes mistakes and I like it.

"Useful idiot" hahahaah I love Marcel, he is too funny and he is so done with humanity in general. I find that #relatable.

The blind girl was a nice addition, it was a sweet moment and a little sad too.

Pan remembering Lyra lashing out at Asriel. Pullman keeps on hurting me and the very few feelings I have. These little remarks, the small things about her parents, this is what keeps me so entertained to be fair. I just love the connections, I love to feel that she still acknowledges them in some way, even though they don’t deserve it.

Brande’s take on fear, which I now forget the entire quote, but that it’s a parasite to human nature, it’s powerful and absolutely and entirely wrong. LMAO Fear is what keeps us human, it keeps us alive. Lyra is constantly afraid.

Malcolm "I'mma steal a boat" hahahah he really has too much chills, even for a crime.

I loved seeing lyra contesting Talbot’s theory, which I did with her. I disagree entirely with everything he says and so does she, at least, she begins to. The man has not a single argument that is solid; he does what many people do: manipulate words that mean nothing, to a sentence so difficult to understand if you’re not sharp or focused enough, that you believe it with not a second guess. Peak Academia elitism.

i feel like Marcel’s either involved with the schools of thought that are causing a rampage or that he is taking advantage of that. It’s too convenient. I don’t know.

I did went back to LBS and I heard Marisa’s voice and I did notice that Michael chose to make Marcel speak in a very similar paced way. I don’t know if it’s deliberate or not, but I thought that was cool. They both sound smooth and condescending. I hope they mention Marisa more, I hope Lyra thinks of her, I don’t know, for a second maybe.

I had hoped to finish this weekend, but I doubt I can because there’s 9 hours left still and I can’t stay awake till late today because I work tomorrow. But so far I’m having lots of fun!

[asm297]

99 Truths, 1 Lie. (My Junior Year)

Before ya go through this and guess the lie, I gotta say that there’s some stuff in here that might make you uncomfortable. Here’s ya warning. Anyway, here we go:

1. Junior year of college was the most tumultuous

2. For every incredibly wonderful day, I felt like I had 2x as many days feeling depressed and alone.

3. But I gotta say, living in a house with some of my coolest friends was super fun.

4. I just hoped that I didn’t “die” at some of the parties, y’know?

5. I’m still learning my “tolerance” lol

6. I don’t like those sugar-y alcohols.

7. They’re tolerable, but they always make me sick.

8. Speaking of which, there’s some things you probably wouldn’t even believe.

9. Almost like that’s the point of this whole “99 Truths, 1 Lie” game, huh?

10. There was a time where I got addicted to nicotine

11. I brought my vape wherever I’d go, cause I liked that buzz it gave me

12. I also used Tinder/Bumble much more often this year

13. I never thought I’d use it considering how much I don’t like dating apps (see “The Incident”)

14. But I gave it a try because of how desperate I was to have company

15. It sorta worked? Depending on how you’d define “worked”.

16. I met a few people off of it. It was awkward every time.

17. The first person I met didn’t even live around UIUC

18. They also assumed we were an official couple after meeting up once.

19. That ended fairly messy.

20. I did end up getting in a short relationship with someone from Tinder.

21. Again, she lived nowhere near UIUC.

22. Our first meetup ever was in a dark forest, at midnight, during the Winter.

23. Some people have told me that was a terrible idea.

24. I have to agree, but what’s the worst that could happen?

25. The possibility of disappearing without a trace? Yeah. Probably.

26. Erm, okay, the following is gonna sound like a total humblebrag, but hear me out:

27. Usually, people would love getting a lot of matches on these dating apps

28. Lately, I’ve been feeling very stressed talking to too many people at once.

29. As I said, humblebrag

29. Xander Mobus is the voice of the announcer in Super Smash Bros. Ultimate

30. But here’s the thing: I don’t consider myself to be an introvert

31. Yet, I’m not a complete extrovert either.

32. At the moment, I’m thinking of two people who I’m totally extroverted with

33. Every time I’d hang with them, I crack jokes and can always do comedic “bits” that they can easily play off of.

34. At the same time, I feel like a literal “fool”

35. There was a time in high school where my friends considered me to be the “super sarcastic” type

36. Secretly, I hated it because that makes me sound like an buttface.

37. Makes me think I’m this one dude you could never have a serious conversation with.

38. I’ll always be a joke to everyone.

39. I changed that once I got to college.

40. Instead of being overly sarcastic, I tried being more extroverted and lively

41. It worked for a bit, especially in my sophomore year here

42. And now... I don’t even know what I am anymore

43. Referring to #32, I now get the feeling that I’m super annoying to both of them now.

44. I get this feeling that they no longer enjoy hanging out with me

45. I’m always concerned with how people see me

46. Strangers, close friends, family. I hope they have a good image of me in their minds.

47. Yet, I can only convince myself that I’ve got no friends anymore

48. Of course, ^that’s not true. I do have people that care about me.

49. But seeing a psychologist multiple times in the last year made the following statement true:

50. I’m in a bad headspace, and my mind is crumbling

51. I saw a social worker over summer 2018

52. It helped, but as soon as I got back for junior year, I was falling apart

53. At one point first semester, I did something that I highly warn all of you to definitely not make the same mistake I did

54. I went for a walk by myself

55. at night

56. with my headphones in

57. I ended up getting followed on my way back home by some random person

58. and I didn’t even notice until much after he started following me

59. That incident really fucked me up for some time

60. But that’s not the mistake I’m talking about

61. The real mistake is walking alone, in the dark, with headphones on for a second time

62. The reason why I did that was because I did something I never saw myself doing ever

63. I hurt myself

64. Right after it happened, I fled my house

65. I was disappointed in myself

66. I was mad at myself

67. I was at my lowest point

68. I walked with no destination in mind

69. Luckily, a very nice friend helped me out, talked with me, comforted me, and I’m forever grateful they were there for me.

70. That’s what lead me to see a psychologist while I was here.

71. That’s all I’ll say on that topic

72. Here’s something completely different: I’ve “intoxicated myself herbally” multiple times

73. A lot of times, at this point. To the point where I can’t even recall how many times I’ve done it.

74. In fact, a roommate said “when is he not high?”

75. It was a bit chilling to hear

76. I’ve also “earned” the title of “smoker of the house” by my roommates

77. On the other hand, I keep notes every time I get “herbally intoxicated”

78. I think most people think it’s weird

79. But I like to use it as a sort of... diary? or journal?

80. I think it’s funny, and memorable. At least most of the time.

81. I also sometimes write letters to people while I’m “herbally intoxicated”

82. Most of the time, it’s so that I can tell them how cool they are and how happy I am that I met them. Sound familiar? You should ask me if I have any letters for you.

83. Anyway, the following statement is a short excerpt from 4/20:

84. “Took a shower, bought I was in there longer. Shower was only 10 minutes. The future was going in slow motion. Like a light bulb memory. Maybe a flash bulb? Listened to Angel Olsen. Felt like I was flying. Time was slow. It felt nice.”

85. If I didn’t believe in parallel universes before, I definitely do now.

86. However, I definitely need to start limiting how often I “herbally intoxicate” myself.

87. Especially considering I am completely fine doing it on my own now.

88. That’s a bit worrisome to me as well.

89. Other than that, I have one more thing that I want to share.

90. It’s something that I have rarely told people because I am afraid as to how they’ll react

91. Like they won’t believe me

92. Or that I’m only “doing it for attention”

93. I have been questioning its “veracity” almost everyday

94. The only reason I’m sharing it is because I was inspired by another person who told me they did the same thing.

95. Although most of everything I’ve said has been true, the main goal was to hit 100 here

96. And I definitely will

97. Even now, I’m going to write the last thing in such a way that most people still won’t know

98. First letters of 93-82 79-90-46-97-29-27-96-91

99. Now it’s out there

100. I don’t wanna thank you for going through this entire list of 99 truths, 1 lie. Please lemme know when ya get here so I can send you a funny meme. Or a song recommendation. I dunno something cool. See ya, and hope ya have a good day. ❤︎

- Armond

[arrossconleche]

Guys, last Sunday I had one of the craziest experiences of my life. It’s not going to sound that impressive, but for me it was a movie moment and something that may never happen again.

I mentioned earlier I was at San Diego for an event, and on Sunday night there was a pool party. Well I was just standing around on my own, and this guy--let’s call him N--approached me and started making conversation about our involvement in the event. At first I wasn’t sure from the way he spoke if he was foreign or just drunk, but he was drunk. Actually, he was both, because he was Canadian. He was also very, very cute, both face and body (he was in swimming trunks).

Well I was a little excited about that exchange, because the conversation went smoothly, and because it was funny that he was slurring his words and kept asking me the same questions multiple times. And the fact that I got to talk face to face to someone as cute as him was really pleasant.

WELL, a few minutes later HE CAME BACK and he wanted to go for a walk????? I hesitated because sirens went off in my head, but then I said sure, but I don’t think he heard me. So he left. But I refused to let it end there and waited nearby, hoping he’d come back once again.

And he did!!!! And he asked me again if I wanted to go on a walk. And I KNOW this was a very, very bad idea. Don’t walk alone with strangers. Don’t walk alone at night with strangers. Don’t walk alone at night with drunk strangers. But I went with him, because this literally never happens to me. Cool motive, still stupid.

So we were walking all alone and again I was answering the same questions. I think he asked me four times what year I was in school. In my head I was hoping he wasn’t much of a threat in this condition since it seemed he could barely even walk, but I knew I was still very vulnerable. I was also wondering if I was the one taking advantage of him since I was sober and he wasn’t.

At one point we sat down, and he asked if I wanted us to get close. I looked to him and said “What?” because I didn’t know what he was talking about. So he asked me if I was cold, and I realized he meant he wanted us to scoot closer together, but I didn’t know what to say, so I just said not right now, since I wasn’t cold right then. It was about then that I realized that if he tried to make a move and I explicitly declined him, he might become aggressive, and we were completely alone in the dark. Soon he asked me if I wanted to go back to the pool, so I said yes. The pool has witnesses.

Back at the pool, he introduced me to his friends. One of them referred to me as N’s girlfriend, and internally I was like, ‘Yes!!! I’m the girlfriend!!!’ All of them were also drunk but nice. We chatted for a bit, and then I sort of faded away from the conversation as usual, so I was feeling awkward. And I didn’t want them to ask me hard questions and realize I’m dumb, so I kind of wanted to get out of there. Eventually they decided to get in the hot tub, but I was wearing jeans and a jacket, so I took that opportunity to say I should be heading back. So he walked me to the stairs leading to where I was staying, and he wished me good luck. And that was it.

So that’s the story of how I risked getting assaulted and became a stranger’s girlfriend for 1.5 hours. It was so exciting to be acknowledged, let alone wanted. He didn’t ask for my number, which was super disappointing. I was so sad I’d never see him again. Maybe he lost interest, or maybe I wasn’t reciprocating enough, or maybe he only wanted a one-night thing, or maybe he was too drunk to know what he was doing. He may not have any recollection of me at this point, which is really sad. In contrast, I’m going to remember him possibly for the rest of my life. I don’t mean that in a creepy way; it’s just the experience was so bizarre for me, I’ll never forget it.

It’s also worth mentioning that the next morning, I saw N’s friend walking around a few times. At one point I saw him walk into a door, and I went by to stand outside that door for a few seconds in hopes he’d come out and see me. I wanted to know if at least he’d remember me (and maybe tell N about me or something??). But he didn’t come out until a few seconds after I had left that spot. So he never saw me.

When I got back home, I was very emotional over the whole trip ending, and by extension, about this encounter with N. I thought about how the only way someone would flirt with me like this would be if they were drunk. I know I’m not pretty or interesting enough. And it was overwhelming to think that this is probably never going to happen again. I felt like I was putting too much emphasis on the fact that someone as cute as him was out of my league and would never approach me in a normal setting, and I hate doing that. I feel very shallow and hypocritical, given that I am the average-looking duckling that no one pays attention to (granted, my personality doesn’t help either). My sister tried to convince me that it’s not bad to like someone for their looks, and that everyone is attractive to someone. She almost convinced me, but I just ended up confused. I know it’s normal to give importance to looks, but it still feels wrong and irresponsible. But going back to my main point, I was stressing over the fact that I had the once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to have someone jump at me so quickly and decidedly, and then it simply faded into nothing just as quickly as it happened.

I do have a way to contact him. Given that he gave me his first name and we were at the same event, it was easy to find his last name on the website, and it was a quick Google search from there. So I could contact him. The question is, should I? At first I thought that was completely out of the question, because I figure if he hadn’t been so drunk, he would’ve never approached me in that manner. And he didn’t ask for my number, so you’d think he didn’t want us to keep in touch. To be fair, I didn’t ask for his number either, but still, he was the forward one, so he should’ve been the one to ask, maybe? Point is, it seems creepy and/or inconsiderate to reach out to him given the circumstances.

But I talked to my sister about it, and she said it was neither creepy nor inconsiderate, but it was not necessarily a good idea, because chances are he doesn’t remember me and won’t want to talk to me. I think I’ll think about it and wait. If I do end up talking to him, I won’t mention the flirting; I’ll just say we talked and throw in the fact he may not remember me and it’s okay if he doesn’t. I definitely don’t want him to feel pressured.

Okay, note, I started writing this post Sunday night, and it is now Tuesday night. I’ve since told my mom this story (although I conveniently left out the part where I was alone with a drunk dude), and without me prompting her, she said I should message him to let him know what kind of funny business he was getting himself into. So I was like, ‘Oh, so even my own mother thinks it’s totally normal if I reach out to him?’ So I sent him a friend request. And he accepted me two hours later. Now I want to wait because, again, I don’t want to seem desperate, so I’ll message him in the morning. But just know I’m super excited about this. Also, the boy speaks French. Kill me now.

Another concern I’ve had, though, is that I’m not sure where I want to go with this. Chances are, without his beer goggles, he won’t be interested anymore, so we’ll probably never talk again after this. Which is fine, and I think I’d still feel satisfied in that case. At least I’d know that he doesn’t want to go through with this, as opposed to being left wondering if we could’ve had something but we lost our chance at the pool. Also, I’d know that he knows about me. Even if he doesn’t remember me, I’d like for him to know that I exist and that we crossed paths at some point.

But if for some unconceivable reason he’s still interested in me, I’m afraid I’d be leading him on for no reason. I’m not sure I want a relationship. I like feeling wanted and all that jazz, but I’m not sure I want to go through the trouble of dating someone, or if I even want to care that much about a stranger. I don’t know; my feelings about these things are very complicated even for me to understand. There are other personal reasons too.

In terms of seeing him specifically, I don’t know if it’s a good idea either. If he flirted with me so out of the blue, there’s a good chance he’s a flirt with everyone. His party-animal demeanor gave me f-boy vibes. And the fact that he was drunk is also a red flag. Sure, he’s young and he was celebrating, but as someone whose father is/was a bit of a drunk, to me it raises some concerns. In his defense, he was very respectful, always seeking consent. But again, here’s where I feel like I’m cutting him too much slack because he was good-looking.

I’ll update tomorrow if he replies.

[thepatricktreestump]

Naughty or Nice: ch2

A/N: damn... definitely wasn’t expecting such a positive response from you guys on that first chapter, but i should have known, y’all never disappoint! hope you enjoy this one my lovely little sinners- i mean saints ;)

               Bright lights, loud music, a roaring crowd- this was most definitely the best decision you’ve made in a really long time. To think that you’d get to experience this every single night, for weeks on end, it was absolutely surreal. Snapping photos of the boys playing their hearts out on stage only made you fall in love with them even more. You wanted to know everything about them, how they started the band, how they came up with all these crazy ideas, anything they’d have to offer. All of you met back at the tour bus after tear down and the two sweaty boys took turns taking showers while you began to download and backup all of the photos you had taken that night.

               “What’d you think of the show?” Josh asked, sitting on the sofa beside you as the tour bus began rolling back onto the highway, water droplets still coating his skin from the shower.

               “It was great!” you gushed. “God it was absolutely amazing. I mean, I’ve been to your shows before, but this was unreal to be that close up, especially at such a huge venue.”

               “Ah I remember playing at yours,” Tyler nodded. “Cool place. The fans are always super creative. I remember we got this huge painting from one of them there last year. They’re talented kids.”

               “I’m going to go turn in for the night. I’m absolutely exhausted. You guys have a nice chat though,” Josh sighed, getting up and waving you both off as he disappeared into the bunkers. “You should get to know y/n a little better Ty, I bet she’s pretty rad.”

               “Whatever,” you laughed.

               “Well I guess he’s right. Seeing as you’re keeping some dirty little secret, aren’t you?” Tyler raised an eyebrow.

               “Oh stop it!” you rolled your eyes. “I can’t even believe you’d remember that.”

               “How can I not?” Tyler argued. “I’m just naturally inquisitive.”

               “How about you guess and then I’ll tell you if you’re right or wrong,” you quipped, seeing as you could almost guarantee they’d never in a million years get either of the two right.

               “Do you pee in the shower?” he questioned and you narrowed your eyes.

               “Dude, everyone pees in the shower,” you scowl. “Just like everyone picks their nose and masturbates.”

               “Right, right,” Tyler chuckled, sitting down on the sofa beside you and taking what had been Josh’s seat prior to him leaving for bed. “Hmm, let me think for a second.”

               “Take your time,” you insisted, setting your laptop and camera aside to face him. “We have all night.”

               “Do we now?” he smirked, making your insides squirm. He was kind of hot you had to admit. Especially with all of his tattoos and him coming out of the shower shirtless. So much for keeping things professional. He sighed, putting his hand up to his chin in a thoughtful position, and you could only imagine the dirtiest of fantasies as you gaze lingered over his knuckles and veins and fingertips. Fuck, it was getting late, wasn’t it? That’s when your naughty side always came out. You swallowed awkwardly, trying to keep your composure.

               “You don’t even have a relative idea?” you tilted your head to the side. “Now come on Tyjo, you’re better than this.”

               “Tyjo?” he tugged his lips into a surprised smile. “Cute you keep up with the nicknames.”

               “I heard a fan scream it out at the show tonight, thought it was cute,” you shrugged, unable to hide the blush that rose to your cheeks. “I think Josh’s is Jishwa if I’m right?”

               “Mhmm…” he affirmed.

               “Extremely cute,” you winked, making him smile wider.

               “Alright stop distracting me,” he teased. “I need to come up with some good guesses. Are you secretly an over obsessive fan or something?”

               “You wish,” you chuckled. “Nah sorry. Just a casual listener.”

               “Do you have some sort of amputation you’re hiding?” he wondered.

               “Nope, got all my limbs,” you shook your head.

               “Are you a serial killer?” he asked.

               “Not yet,” you joked.

               “Maybe I’m the serial killer,” he challenged, evil glint in his eyes.

               “Oh yeah?” you laughed. “What? Are you going to choke me to death on the sofa?”

               “If you’re into that,” he winked, making your heart skip a beat.

               “Maybe I am,” you replied way too quickly for your liking, having him raise both of his eyebrows.

               “Yeah?” he verified. “You’re a kinky one?”

               “Tyler,” your voice took on a warning tone but you could already feel your palms begin to sweat. Even though you were both just playing around and joking, technically, half of your secret was out.

               “I never said I was or wasn’t a serial killer,” he shrugged, naughty smile on his face. “Or a kinky person myself.”

               “Ah!” you dished it right back. “So you are too.”

               “Never verified,” he smirked. “However, you just did.”

               Your entire face went completely red. “Wait Tyler no-” you panicked, your heart racing.

               “Nope, you just told me,” he chuckled. “God, is that really what you were so afraid about us finding out?”

               “Ty,” you felt your body shaking. You were so fucking stupid. How could you let him already know? Might as well throw professionalism out the window at this point. Might as well resign on the first night. You wanted to crawl into a hole and die.

               “It’s not that big of a deal,” he laughed. “Dude, I’m pretty sure anyone would be turned on by a little bondage.”

               “Woah, I said nothing about bondage,” you insisted, his laughter and carefree attitude putting you at ease.

               “Not yet,” he chuckled. “God, are you for real about all of this? Or is it just a ruse?”

               Part of you just wanted to save your ass and tell him yeah, you were keeping up with the joke just to be funny or whatever, but another part of you wanted to know what his reaction would be. Much less, if he’d ever act on it. Instead you just stared at him blinking, unsure of what to say.

               “I know a way we can find out,” he suddenly came to the realization, simper on his face growing wider as he reached his hand out to wrap around your throat, you staring at him wide eyed, involuntarily parting your lips and tilting your head back to give him full access, closing your eyes and sighing as he tightened his fingers around you, then released the grip after several seconds and pulled away, smiling ear to ear. “Well ladies and gentlemen I think we have an answer.”

               “Tyler…” you drew in a shaky inhale, trying to catch your breath, staring at him still, mesmerized. “We can’t- you can’t- this isn’t-”

               “What?” he cocked his head to the side, frowning slightly. “We can’t have a little bit of fun, doll?”

               “Ty-” the nickname made you weak and he could tell, chuckling to himself.

               “Come on baby,” he put a hand on your thigh, looking into your eyes. “You can’t have possibly just confessed that to me for no reason, I know a flirt when I see one.”

               “Okay maybe but-”

               “Another confession,” he hummed. “Well here’s one from me for once, yes. I am into that kind of stuff too. In fact, particularly interested and into you.”

               “Tyler,” you warned but he just began to run his hand up and down your leg.

               “What? You can always tell me to stop you know,” he reminded. “But that’s the thing, you want this.”

               “Yeah, I do,” you looked away, shy. “But I’m not allowed, what about Josh?”

               “Josh doesn’t have to know,” Tyler offered. “This can just be our little secret, you know?”

               “That’s the thing,” you suddenly came up with an idea in your mind, smirking yourself. “You only know half it yourself.”

               “Woah, woah, woah, wait. Half?” Tyler stares at you, withdrawing his hand, shocked. “There’s another half? You’ve got more tricks up your sleeve? Hold up, you’ve got to tell me the other half! Are you like paid for this kind of shit or are you some sort of porn actress or something?”

               “You’ll never know,” you shrugged teasingly. “I’m not telling you. And even if you guess, I’m still not going to. Because you only know one part, and you know who I’m going to tell the other to?”

               “Don’t you dare say Josh,” Tyler warns. “Y/n no way- come on, I thought we were bonding and really getting to know each other and stuff.”

               “Nope, decision made final,” you grinned. “You know this little dirty part of me, and Josh gets to know the other part you’ll never figure out.”

               “Not fair!” Tyler whined. “Hey, I thought this was like our moment of becoming close friends and stuff.”

               “I’m not going to be friends with benefits with you Tyler Joseph,” you narrowed your eyes. “You either date me and fuck me right or not at all. I’m a slut, but I’m not a whore.”

               “Goddamn,” he drew his lower lip between his teeth and stared at you with half lidded eyes. “You’re being serious right now?”

               “Depends if you want to be,” you offered. “But Josh gets to know the other half. This is all I’m giving you.”

               “You’re giving me plenty,” Tyler sighs. “I can’t imagine there’s more.”

               “Well there is,” you remind.

               “Damn,” Tyler sighs, watching as you cover your mouth as you yawn, then flutter open your sleepy eyes to chuckle at him.

               “I’m turning in for the night, I’ll catch up with you later,” you decide, caressing his arm before getting up and leaving, him reaching out to grab your wrist.

               “Wait,” he stops you. “Just so we’re clear, this is like, not just a benefits thing. I really dig you, y/n. Truly. I want to get to know you more.”

               “Me too, Joseph,” you smile as he lets go of your wrist, staring at you with fascination. “So looks like this will work out perfectly for the both of us.”

               “Sick,” Tyler gives a boyish laugh, almost in disbelief that this was really happening.

               “Goodnight Ty. Get some rest, yeah?” you tell him, blowing a soft kiss.

               “Will do,” he promises. “And sweet dreams to you too, y/n. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

               Tucking yourself into your covers, you close your eyes, thinking of what you’ve just disclosed to him. Years of trying to keep it a secret from people, chatting through long distance relationships online about your dirty fantasies, constantly trying to seek out someone with similar interests, and then of all places, you just happen to get stuck on a tour bus with a fairly attractive man who just so happens to claim to be as kinky are you are. It couldn’t possibly be a mere coincidence. This had to be fate. And if you played your cards right, deliberately, cautiously, and decisively, you just might miraculously find the other piece to complete your puzzle in the exact same place as the first.

[aisuho]

Steam Prison

So, recently I’ve started to play and finished Steam Prison. Steam Prison is an “otome” Visual Novel. A word of warning: the game has some heavy content (as in violence, not sex per se), so can be a little... well.

You start with the MC talking about scenting the smell of blood, which leads to the scene of her holding a knife, clothes all stained as she looks herself in the mirror, in shock. Then you go back 2 days before the events, learning more about the protagonist, the country (Heights) and their government (the Temple).

The first route I played was Eltcreed’s (part of the Bodyguard Route).

I’ve played most of my first route without a guide, but by the end of it I started following Rezareth’s, as I was afraid of missing something. The order of the routes she gives is Eltcred->Ulrik->Adage->Ines->Yune->Grand Ending, which seems the best order considering the info you learn in each of them. Also, be aware that you can’t play Yune’s without seeing one of Ulrik’s ending first, and can’t play the Grand Ending without catching ‘em all.

Bodyguard Route, Eltcreed and Ulrik.

In the Bodyguard Route you get to live as Eltcreed’s bodyguard, so you don’t get to see much of Sanctuary District nor its characters. However, you get a lot of info about the Heights and the world beyond the walls of the District Sanctuary, as well as Eltcreed and Ulrik’s characters.

Eltcreed Valentine

Starting with Eltcreed, he was the first route I played. He’s an eccentric character, the kind of double-edged sword --  he can be funny, light and a flirt, but also cold and strategist. Also, he loves the Heights and is really into fairytales. Honestly, he is my least favorite; mostly because throughout his route he is really pushy (he forcefully kisses her a relative amount of times); alas, him calling her Kishi-sama (Knight) all the time can be tiresome.

Here is where the MC is the dumbest... She really annoyed me because she was clueless about everything. I mean, I get it that love is forbidden in the Heights and all that, but she is just too dense...

He has kind of two “happy” endings, both are satisfying and different, which makes it hard for me to choose which one I prefer.

Eltcreed’s route is also where you’re first introduced to one of the other bachelor’s (if you don’t go to the Prisoner Route first): Adage; I will get more into it later. And where you get your first look on Fin as a bad guy...! Most of the bad endings throughout all the routes are related to him, and they can be heavy. Like, really heavy. Although you don’t get much of him in the Bodyguard’s route, which is why I’ll keep my intakes about him as a character for later.

[Spoilers about Eltcreed’s route]

Honestly, I was kind of disappointed because the assassination of MC’s parents are kind of swept under the rug; you learn nothing about the case itself and is left with lots os unanswered questions, which was very frustrating for me. Another thing that made uncomfortable was Merlot and Rielith’s being totally forgotten whatsoever. You only hear about them again if you get one of the bad endings (that ending gave me shivers), so...

About his two “happy” endings, I think his maxed affection ending (“My Queen”) makes me a little uncomfortable given that you side with the Hounds (specially Sachsen) in order to restore the peace. To be honest, that didn’t bothered me much at first, but after finishing the game and seeing so much of Sachsen’s actions my opinion towards him is the lowest possible, so it made me mad to side with him and totally overlook everything he has done. Saying that, I much prefer the “The Lasting Future” ending, which gives a better closure overall, specially when taking into account that it addresses the Depths-Heights topic.

Other than that, I really enjoyed learning more about the Depths and more about the two main characters in this route: Ulrik and Eltcreed. I really enjoying their interaction/bickering, it was really funny to watch.

Nonetheless, it was a fun route play, and I liked it, although the matter of Tisselas’ murder being totally pushed to the side really bothered me.

Anyway, I take Eltcreed’s Route as an introduction to the game’s lore, specially all the Depths-Heights trouble, it made great work of that part, as it’s the only route where you get so deep into their story and culture, so it should really be played first.

Ulrik Ferrie

Damn, what can I say about Ulrik’s Route...

I need to say first-hand that he was my favorite character until then, but his route was just... lacking. It felt weird because throughout Eltcreed’s he is snarky, but in a fun way. However, when you come to his own route he is totally rude towards the MC and barely makes any effort to improve his relationship. He was giving me so much cold-shoulder that I felt that I wasn’t even playing his route at all.

Ulrik’s route felt really disconnected from everything else in the game, like, forget (again) about MC’s parents, the Hounds, or Rielith and Merlot. Forget about Fin, also; as far as I remember he barely (if even) appears here.

Ulrik has his own issues to solve and his route is all about that. One of his endings is important, as you get some relevant info and it is necessary to unlock Yune’s route. On the bright side, you go deep into his character’s story, and his family.

[Spoilers about Ulrik’s]

Vice should have been more explored in other routes, I mean, he appears in Eltcreed’s if you don’t go to the Heights, but that’s all. When I first saw him there, I was like... “who the f* are you?” And they he went and killed Fin... -_-

Don’t get me wrong, I liked that Vice and Rafele group weren’t as dumb as Ulrik first thought, but the fact that they are barely mentioned otherwise felt like wasted potential.

MC also needs a lot of rescue here, to the point that was kind of “damn, how can you be a bodyguard if you’re the one needing saving all the time”.

Ulrik’s ending “The Final Page” was the first one I saw in his route, and made me profoundly sad. I just wanted to hug him, but stupid MC was dead already. (-_-) That CG, though...!

The “Words Unspoken” ending was just... stupid. This is where I became really annoyed over Ulrik’s route, because his character/personality was just so... not there. I mean, he was like a spoiled brat, and it became so frustrating for me. It made hard to believe he was a spy.

My biggest trouble with Ulrik’s, however, is not his badly developed personality or character, but Eltcreed... At this point I was so mad with Eltcreed having so much spotlight that I started disliking him. I mean, in the end, it was Eltcreed who saved the day, like... wtf? Dude, can’t you stop being so egocentric for a moment and let the others shine?

Ulrik’s happy ending was cute but still not quite there.

I felt that Ulrik showed more emotion in Eltcreed’s bad ending, “Goodbye, My Knight” (aka Ulrik’s ending), than anywhere else in his own route (which made me even bitter).

Prisoner Route, Adage and Ines

The Prisoner Route is where you refuse Ulrik proposal and choose to stay in the Sanctuary District. This is where your lingering questions are answered, too.

In my opinion, this is where the MC really shines!

Adage

At this point I wasn’t looking forward to play Adage route. Firstly because I was really sore over Ulrik’s, second was because I didn’t know anything about the character except that he was a doctor. But boy, wasn’t I in for a surprise...!

Adage’s route is the heaviest, for many reasons... It’s really dark and sad, even the happy endings are sad. Everything is sad. I mean it.

After this, he became my favorite character, and his route was also my favorite. I liked it so much that I’m thinking of replaying it, just because... feels!

Adage is a little quiet, but is sharp and straightforward, he is a very intriguing character, overall. His voice is very deep and soothing, which added greatly to his character, sounding very mature and fitting overall.

[Spoilers for Adage’s]

Ok! MC is her best here, she starts working and learns to do some things like tending the garden, cooking and even some basic medicine skills. She also has a strong personality, because Adage pushes her to her limits (boy, didn’t I love that outburst?). He also doesn’t let her go into that “I don’t know love” bs, because he is so straightforward with her...!

I also liked how she reacts to his father’s issues. It felt way more mature than how she handled Ulrik.

His route is full of golden scenes (totally spot-on, I loved it):  the first kiss, the fight in his house and even that feeding scene...! My only complaint was the fact that the happy ending kind of dragged itself longer than it should have, which made it less powerful, but it still didn’t affect the route’s vibes in general.

The bad endings were sad and brutal... I felt really sorry for Adage and was creeped out by Glissade. It was so disturbing that at some point I started seeing demon eyes every time Glissade appeared.

Not to mention, Adage’s route is where you find out the person behind MC’s parents’ death (but not who executed them). Here you also discover what Fin was up to all the time. Damn you, Glissade!

It wasn’t easy to endure all the pain and brutality in Adage’s Route, but I think it was well written and the character was concise throughout it. You also receive a lot of answers here, which made it even more enjoyable.

Ines

Ines is the stiff vice commander of the Hounds, he’s calm and cool headed. You can get some light of his character in Adage’s route, as he appears there quite a few times.

His route is where MC gets by mostly by herself. She lives alone in Rielith and Merlot’s house, and has to overcome the grief to make a living.

[Spoilers about Ines]

His route was a light one, more romance and less drama. It was fun to get some info about not only his past, but also Sanchsen and the Hounds’.

It wasn’t clear to me if Ines liked MC until near the end of the route. As I got the bad ending “The Fangs of a Hound” first, I could see the extent of Ines feelings, which was very well delivered by his Voice Actor! This was where I started liking the character better too (he was kind of neutral for me before that).

Ines’ happy ending was one of the best. To me that was a true happy ending, given that it also seemed to shine a light and bring peace to Fin. It also removes Sachsen, although I don’t like how in the end his death made he be treated as some sort of good character. Don’t get me wrong, I know he had some traumas due to Theia’s death, BUT, I can’t feel sorry for him after everything I had seen him do, specially towards Fin.

Given all of the revelations how MC and Ines are connected, it felt to me that their love was the “Fate drives us together”/“Forgotten first meeting” trope-thing.

Oh, I really liked his interaction with Saint Yune! It was nice to see him fluster and break that stiff shell, it really added to his character.

As your lingering question about MC’s parents death are answered, this is a good Route to leave last (still before Yune’s). As I said, it was a light and slow paced story, I don’t like that the romance was very roundabout, but this doesn’t make it less enjoyable.

Servant Route and Yune

Forget everything about going to the Depths! Here, you escape from being exiled and instead has to serve Saint Yune as his attendant.

Yune’s route reminded me of Ulrik’s, not because of the frustration, but because it felt more disconnected from the game itself, like having its own plot to go. I honestly had mixed feelings about it. Yune looks like a teenage, and that made me really uncomfortable overall. It was hard to ignore that and keep reminding myself that he is in fact hundreds of years old.

You go deep into learning his story too, his relation with the Ferrie and how he became a saint. It was nice to see more abou the flood, and how the Heights came to be.

[Spoilers about Yune Route]

Ok! The stone of God thing was kind of weird... it added a supernatural element that doesn’t seem complacent with the vibe of the game, which was why I said it felt really disconnected from everything else.

I had some trouble also understanding if Yune really liked MC. I mean, he was so absorbed on his plan of dying that it made me confused -- did he really like her or was he just using her to reach his goal? Nonetheless, the bad ending didn’t contribute to dispelling my doubts... as he just kind of kills her without more or less.

I get it that he did indeed like MC, but for me their romance wasn’t quite there yet, so it was hard to get attached to the character.

Another thing that troubled me was when you have the option to speak or not to Fin, as I was going towards the bad ending first, I followed the guide and chose not to speak with him. However, the story kept going and even led to more choices afterwards, which left me wondering all the time if I had made the wrong choice. In the end, I did get the bad ending first (”A thread unbroken”), but it took quite long to achieve it.

His happy ending, though... what was that? As I played, I thought I had made a mistake again, because I was thinking it was going towards a bad ending. I gotta clarify here that I didn’t choose all his positive answers (I chose “He is important to me” when he asked me about Fin, hihi), so there was that... Anyway, his happy ending felt really sad and left me with many questions. Like, what happened to the Heights after his death?

However, I did enjoy both his “Lingering scent” and “Let’s meet again” endings. They did gave some closure and were well delivered.

It wasn’t all bad, I liked Yune as a character, but not as a love interest.

Grand Ending

After you achieve all the character’s endings, you have the choice to play the Grand Ending, in which MC’s parents are alive and well, you’re not exiled and whatnot.

[Spoilers]

Well, this was it. It was enjoyable to see the interaction between all the characters, and everyone played somewhat of a role here, even Fin. It left me wishing that we could have seen more interaction between them in other routes too.

However, I felt that lots of things were left unsolved. Yeah, MC had her true happy ending, her parents were alive, she became important, the Heights and Depths relationship was going well and all that, but... having played through all the routes and seeing everything about the other’s characters made it feel like they deserved more. Ulrik didn’t come to terms with his trusting issues, Adage didn’t really solve his own problems with his father, Ines never investigated his partner’s death, Yune never went after his mortality... so lots of loose ends.

Another thing I’d like to point out is how MC’s parents suddenly vanish. Like, without any explanation whatsoever. Although one of the characters (I don’t remember which one) suggests that they may have been arrested or even found shelter somewhere else, even after the confusion is solved, they are never mentioned again. Not even when Yune dissolves the Assembly.

I would’ve liked if you still had some choice of romance here, specially given that Heights laws about love were dissolved, and you were now free to choose whoever. Still, MC never matured, she still knew nothing about romance, so... it felt like there was no character development whatsoever.

Bonus: Fin Eclause

[Spoilers for all routes]

Fin! I have very mixed feelings about Fin. He was my favorite character, and I felt he deserved to be better treated. He is at the same time simple and complex, because he had very complicated feelings and didn’t know how to control them. He matured in a bad way, was badly mistreated and lost all he had except his feelings for MC. MC was what kept his little humanity alive.

Every time Fin appeared onscreen it left me with a profound sadness. I was so depressed to see he go through all he went over and over again... The Grand Ending didn’t really help too, he was temporally promoted to chief of the police then demoted again. He was only able to confess his feelings when he was dying, and not even in the Grand Ending his feelings were let known.

The way Sachsen kept abusing him was one of the reasons I never could forgive or get over his demeanor.

I know that in the Vita version he is a love interest but... I won’t be able to play it, so I’m kind of bitter over it all.  Not to mention, from what I gathered, in his route he takes your place as an exiled. I would’ve liked to see both routes: one where he is in the Hounds and another where he is a prisoner. Honestly, I’m curious to see how his relationship with the MC would’ve developed in both scenarios.

Final thoughts

I really enjoyed the game, but now that I’ve finished it I have that sensation of “what now?”... I hope I can play the Vita version one day and get Fin’s route, as I don’t think it’ll come to PC version.

MC seemed to have a better personality in some routes than others. Ulrik’s route for me was a little disappointing, but I still like the character very much.

I felt like the plot was good, but felt little developed in some routes.

Maybe I’ll play Adage’s route again, because I enjoyed it very much.

My favorite characters are: Fin->Adage->Ulrik->Ines->Saint Yune->Eltcreed.

And my favorite routes are: Adage->Ines->Eltcreed->Saint Yune->Ulrik.

I’d like to state that everything I’ve said is only my opinion as a person and a player. In no way I was looking to offend anyone. You’re free to disagree as you may see fit.

[here-there-be-nerds]

Single Dad Taako 6

( 0 ) ( 1 ) ( 1.5 ) ( 2 ) ( 3 ) ( 4 ) ( 5 ) ( 6 ) ( 7 ) ( 8 ) ( 9 ) ( 10 ) ( 11 )

Thank you to all of you that suggested dates! I’ll be adding more in the next one.

___________________________________________________

While everything had been pretty settled during the quest the boy's ended up calling Crystal Kingdom for the obvious joke it turns out there were a few loose ends Kravitz wanted to go over. Taako was more than delighted to take on the task on meeting up with Kravitz. He wasn't a fool though, despite the stupid shit he got up to, he arranged to meet the reaper somewhere more public to control the scene lest things go south.

The Chug N' Squeeze was the big new thing that just opened up on the moon base where the Bureau of Balance did most of its business and its launching. This establishment was known for its fine wine selections and entertaining pottery classes. Have a drink, make a pot, have a fun night.

This is where Kravitz found himself awkwardly walking into, of all the places to meet Taako to discuss something that could potentially take the elf to the Astral Plane. Kravitz says potentially, but he had already discussed the case with the Raven Queen and she found it a sound mistake, she also said that Lady Istus explained the situation and cleared the matter. So really this was no longer necessary but...Kravitz found himself intrigued by Taako.

Kravitz found Taako easily enough and took a seat at the pottery wheel next to him as he greeted him. As he looked around the room he noticed all the stations were set in pairs and everyone in attendance seemed enamored with each other. They were all couples certainly.

"Hey homie~" Taako greeted as he sat down.

They both worked on pottery as they discussed the issues of Refuge, arguing the concept of the boy's being special edge cases and not just the run of the mill souls to worry over. Taako insisted on making a fine bowl despite the theme of the night being vases, it was incredibly endearing. The more they spoke the more Kravitz couldn't understand Taako.

"If you don't me asking, but why are you doing all this? Risking your life and putting yourself in known dangerous situations?" Kravitz asked.

"Because I'm afraid no one else would have me." Taako responded without missing a beat.

The phrasing haunting familiar to Kravitz in a way he wasn't prepared for, he felt like that was something he should recall with but couldn't place it. He was far too unnerved in the blatant honest, it was disarming.

"Wow." Kravitz said blindsided. "That was a very honest answer; I have to admit I'm a bit shocked."

"Well, I mean, it is the truth. And if I can't be honest in the...in the Chug N' Squeeze, where can I, my man?" Taako said with restrained laughter with how absurd that must sound.

They spoke more of personal things after that, Kravitz had even shared his dreams of when he was alive of being a conductor for an orchestra. Taako told a tale of how he had lived out his dreams of being a traveling celebrity chef for a few years but dodged when asked why he stopped.

During things Taako had slid his chair closer to Kravitz's station as he showed signs of struggling with his piece. Taako placed his hands over Kravitz’s, having to move behind him some and pressing against his shoulder.

"Ah, hatchi matchi, those are clammy." Taako said as he discovered the icy feel of the reaper’s skin, he supposed he shouldn't have been surprised.

Taako noted how flustered Kravitz had become and smiled secretly to himself as he assisted in the shaping of Kravitz's vase. If he shared with the reaper a half lidded look that was rather sensual, well, that was how Taako do.

Taako giggled as Kravitz began to go skeletal in the middle of things and finally backed off, oh yes, this was going to be interesting.

That had been their first date, something to this day Kravitz had been thrown off by. Their second had been a more official affair that Taako allowed Kravitz to plan. The man did not disappoint.

While inter plane rift traveling was something that would be something to get used to it was the best way to find yourself literally anywhere.

Where Kravitz had taken him was breath taking to say the very least, it was a stunning lake that went on for miles that at first he thought it was the ocean. Kravitz couldn't have known this, but the beach had been a special thing for Taako, he and his family had spent an entire month out on the beach front because...well that was another story. So Taako's heart clenched pleasantly as he watched the sun sparkle like diamonds crashing against the shore.

Kravitz cool hand slipped into Taako's and it drew him out of himself as he saw a smile grace the reapers face. It felt like Taako was caught up in the waves the way Kravitz looked at him, like the man was seeing a sunset for the first time. It was like the world shifted as Kravitz lead Taako down the shore.

They abandoned the idea of wearing shoes in favor of holding them as they rolled up their pants and allowed the cold waters to wash over their feet. Taako was delighted to see buttoned up Kravitz in such a relaxed state.

The venture had lead them a good ways from where they had started, Taako didn't mind at all as he looped arms with Kravitz and they chatted through the journey. Taako had teased him relentlessly for being so cliché and loving how incredibly easy it was to fluster the Grim Reaper.

They came upon a blanket in the middle of the beach that was strewn with a simple picnic set up and a wine bottle set in a bucket of ice.

"What...did you really?" Taako asked as he turned to Kravitz.

"Too cliche again?" Kravitz asked, almost genuinely concerned.

"Well..." Taako leaned more into Kravitz as he looked over the blanket. "It’s classic for a reason, my dude, it's...sweet."

When they settled in and Kravitz served Taako up a plate he sheepishly admitted he hadn't made of it and actually had to find a vendor to pick it up from.

"I don't think I've been in a kitchen for a few decades and that was still for work." Kravitz said with a nervous laugh.

"No worries, can't all be five star chefs." Taako said as he took the plate of boneless chicken and sides of coleslaw and mashed potatoes. "Did you go to Fantasy KFC?" He snorted.

"No?" Kravitz said puzzled. "Would have you preferred that?"

"Hell no." Taako scrunched up hoax nose. "None for Taako, thanks. Nah, this does look much better, less greasy."

It wasn't half bad and the real treat was watching Kravitz try to figure out how to eat a drum stick. The man ended up using a fork and knife insisting he didn't want to get it all over his hands. Taako could hardly stifle his laughter despite his best efforts.

It had been a simple thing but it had Taako on cloud nine when he came home. Angus was probably in bed by now, grumpy that Taako had Barry and Lup watch him.

Taako sighed dreamily to himself, ignoring how silly it was to feel like this after just a few dates but after all the shit in his life? He felt he deserved some school kid gushing over the cute boy that actually wanted to keep seeing him. Kravitz was a sap, Taako could already see that. He was so cheesy but it was so attractive? He treated Taako like he hung the moon, it was hauntingly familiar but at the same time utterly unique.

Taako's ears flicked as he heard small sounds down the hall and he silently moved to catch Angus hiding in the hall.

"Ah!"

"Ah!" Taako mocked, rolling his eyes playfully. "What are you doing up, squirt?"

"I...I just wanted to make sure you were home." Angus stammered, flustered at being caught.

"Yea, just ol'Taako." Taako said, ruffling Angus' hair as he passed him on his way to his room. "Hit the hay, kiddo, its late."

"Okay..." Angus mumbled and it stopped Taako in mid reach for his door.

"You okay?" Taako asked looking back at the boy.

Angus shifted his weight from foot to foot; his gaze down and Taako realized he was wearing his glasses. He'd been up for a while.

"Sleep over?" Taako asked softly.

Angus nodded a little and went into his room to retrieve a pillow and joined Taako into his room.

"Did you have fun hangin with your nerdy aunt and uncle?" Taako asked as he started getting ready for bed and Angus got under the covers.

"Yes...but I don't need babysitters when you go out on missions and stuff." Angus huffed haughtily as he sunk under the covers. "I'm almost ten years old now, sir; I can take care of myself."

"You can barely reach the cupboards." Taako pointed out as his disappeared into the master bath to change into his pajamas.

"I...I have a stool!" Angus protested.

"Anges, it just makes /me/ feel better." Taako said as he came back out. "Knowing people who can reach the food are here."

Angus hid a smile under the covers, Taako may have had him a year and something now, but it always funny to watch the elf try to act like he didn't care about the little things. It was something Angus learned about quick and he saw right through it and it always made him really happy as strange as it was. Because it meant Taako /cared/ about /him/. It meant a lot, these moments.

Taako had swung some pretty baller tickets if he did say so himself~ It was actually something that had been a bit difficult and he had a bit of a time about it but Taako could be quite Charming when he wanted to be. It wasn't like that guy was gonna be there night of anyway.

It also gave him the perfect excuse to go all the fuck out wardrobe wise, he finally got to slip into that sleek navy gown that fit him like a glove, dust off his pearls and his finest heels.

A night at the opera, usually not Taako's thing, but Kravitz was going to lose his mind. They met at the theater and instantly Kravitz dropped his jaw, had he been in skeleton mode it literally would have fallen to the ground, Taako would have loved to see that.

"Ready babe?" Taako smirked pleased with himself beyond belief.

"I...you...wow." Kravitz swallowed, something Taako was sure wasn't something the reaper needed to do, but he had been picking up some mortal traits the longer he kept up a physical form. A form Taako dug.

"Yea, this ole thing." Taako unfurled his hand fan to cover his shit eating grin. "Bout time I got some use out of it."

"You...you look astounding." Kravitz breathed as he looked Taako in the eyes and it sent pleasant fluttering through the elf.

That wasn't something he was used to, his dates usually said things like that looking a little further south and the honesty of it had Taako resisting to squirm. What the fuck?

"Could say the same, but you always look killer." Taako snorted. "Maybe not the best turn of phrase, but works all the same."

Kravitz smiled as he chuckled and offered his arm which Taako graciously took.

"I had no idea you were interested in Riley Switz's work." Kravitz said as they made their way inside.

"Oh yea, for sure, he's totally the best, never go unless it's my dude Switz." Taako said as he pressed into Kravitz side.

"You've never heard of her have you?" Kravitz lifted a brow good-naturedly.

"I've never heard of them." Taako admitted, grinning slyly.

"You're in for a treat; she is a very talented composer." Kravitz said.

Kravitz went on and on about his favorite pieces by this whoever as they handed over their tickets and found their box. Yes, box, Taako didn't half ass a fancy ass date. Kravitz was ecstatic and the way his lit up at the view was worth the gold spent and how he jabbered on this that went straight over Taako's head made the elf bite his lip to keep smiling like a dope.

The show started and Kravitz took Taako's hand in his own and the cool touch was really starting to feel nice in his hands. Kravitz was like a child when he watched the opera unfold, getting to the edge of his seat at parts, covering his mouth at the dramatics, squeezing Taako's hand along with every emotional reaction.

It was stunning; Taako almost missed most of the performance because of the better show he had up here in the box they shared. Kravitz really was something else, always surprising him.

  After the show, Kravitz was on another high of rambling as they went back down. So focused on discussing his favorite parts that he hadn't noticed that Taako had been leading him back stage.

"You wanna tell them that?" Taako asked as he jerked his head in the direction of the members of the orchestra that was finishing up packing their things.

Kravitz focused on where they were and gasped, unnecessary for a man that doesn't require to breathe. How could Taako get more of these reactions?

"I, we, what?" Kravitz sputtered.

"Got back stage access, baby~!" Taako bragged as he grinned.

Kravitz looked at Taako and the elf gripped his clutch bag tightly, he was looking at Taako like he had been the performance the whole time. Like he was the dazzling lights, the stunning costuming, the rise and fall of music perfectly executed. It was flooring to be so adored by a single person.

"You did all this...for me?" Kravitz asked astonished.

"Yea, it's whatever." Taako shifted his gaze, it was too much. "I know you like this music crap so I was like what the hell, y'know?"

Taako started as Kravitz took his hands despite the clutch in his way, squeezing gently and Taako looked at him. Breath taking, fuck, Kravitz was over the moon right now and Taako put that look on his face.

"Thank you." Kravitz said softly.

The words so simple so common, but Kravitz's eyes spoke volumes more. It swept Taako away in emotions he hadn't felt in years and also never at all. These were original and untainted. The reaper might as well have said the big three and maybe in a way he had?

"It's...n-nothin'." Taako stammered as he tried to maintain his aloof allure.

Kravitz's smile shifted into something more knowing and pleased. Well fuck.

They spent the rest of their time at the theatre speaking with the band members, Taako's arm lopped with Kravitz as the reaper asked question after question. When he wasn't asking he was complimenting them all like the huge nerd he was. It was a great night.

At the end of the night Kravitz dropped Taako off at the moon base dorm he was staying at for an upcoming mission, that and Taako hadn't wanted Angus to be uncomfortable with a stranger around the house. That was a different thing for a different time.

"I had...the most amazing time." Kravitz said as they stood outside of Taako's door, a strange formality for a man who can rip open rifts to anywhere.

"It was pretty bitchin'." Taako agreed, biting his lip as he looked into Kravitz's adoring eyes. "Let's do it again sometime?" Taako restrained himself from clenching his hands, shoving his insecurities off the side of the moon base.

"I'll try to live up to this level of entertainment." Kravitz joked without pause, no hesitation, already planning their next date in his head.

Taako relaxed and smoothed out the tension in his shoulders with a shrug.

"No worries, kemosabe, not everything can get up to the hype of a Taako event. Anything is chill." Taako said casually and it had been honest, Taako didn't need flare from Kravitz, just his company would be enough. Taako tried to ignore how sappy that was.

"Still, I already can't wait." Kravitz said as he stepped into Taako's personal space, looking flushed as he gazed into Taako's eyes, possibly his soul.

"May I? Uh, may I kiss you?" Kravitz asked so politely Taako wanted to laugh but he couldn't find it in him to do it.

"Yea, lay it on me." Taako blushed lightly despite his flippant response.

Kravitz didn't seem to mind, he didn't seem to mind so much about Taako. He seemed thrilled and delighted in the elf's very existence; it was something to get used to.

Kravitz placed a cool hand on Taako's hip and held them flush against each other as his other hand cupped Taako's cheek as if he was delicate fine china. Looked at him like he was a precious thing meant to be cared for and Taako was swept away and they hadn't even kissed yet!

Their lips meet in a softness Taako wasn't used to. Rough, sharp, with demanding hands handling him with the intention to break, hell yea; that was the usual for ol'Taako. But not Kravitz, he was so gentle in his affection as they slotted together, as if Taako was his prized possession that he took the upmost care of least it get damaged. Except...Kravitz would never think of Taako as a possession but a gift to be near, the way he kissed Taako, giving the elf every opportunity to pull away at any time.

It was so overwhelming that Taako had almost not noticed how cold Kravitz's lips were. Sure it was a bit weird at first, but he delighted in it, it was so Kravitz. When they parted Taako couldn't open his eyes for a few moments, he didn't even know where he was for a second.

"I...fuck." Taako sputtered as he opened his eyes to see that adoring face. "Like...damn. How were you ever single?"

Kravitz stared at him perplexed for a beat before laughing boisterous and unrestrained. Oh no, Taako was done for, for sure.

They shared another, shorter kiss before they parted for the night. Taako pressed his back against his door once he was inside.

Was it possible to fall in love this quickly? In this short of time? The one thing people in love rarely have enough of? Oh boy, he was in it now.

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Thanks for reading and hey....I love you guys.

[freshwater--mermaid]

Ersatz Ch 18: I Died So I Could Haunt You

Johnny's eyes widened as he saw two young teens crossing the street toward him. He recognised them as people the ghost kid hung out with. He stood straight, muscles tightening as he prepared to fly away.

"Don't be scared." Sam called, raising a hand as she and Tucker neared. "We just want to talk to you."

Johnny was doubtful, but seeing as they didn't pose much of a threat, he remained where he stood. The three stared at one another in silence for several moments, each seeming to wait for the other to act. Finally, Sam stepped forward.

"Can you tell us why you tried to kill Jazz?" she asked, hands clutching the straps of her spider backpack. She could feel the impression of the Fenton Thermos against her back, and hoped she wouldn't have to use it.

Johnny's head fell, his eyes staring at the ground. His hands clenched and unclenched repeatedly as he opened his mouth to speak, his voice raspy and hesitant.

"I-I don't know." he said, not looking up. "I mean, I don't want her dead. But..."

"But?" Sam pressed.

"But I don't know!" Johnny looked at them with frustration plain on his face. "I don't know what's wrong with me. I feel like something's missing; something important. And it felt like I had to go to that place out of town. But Jazz had to come with me. I don't know why...I really don't."

The man was clearly at a loss, not understanding his own motivations or actions. Sam and Tucker felt sorry for him, though they were still hesitant to trust him. No matter what, he had almost gotten Jazz killed.

Sam realised that Johnny must not know about his girlfriend's survival. Heck, he didn't even seem to remember her. Sam took another, small step toward the blond, thinking of the best way to give him the news.

A blur crashed down on the pavement bare inches from her, and Sam stumbled back into Tucker out of surprise. She immediately recognised the back of Danny's shirt, and stepped forward to grip it tightly.

"Danny stop." she said forcefully. "We're just going to talk, remember?"

"Yeah, like she said." Johnny mumbled out, stepping away from the trio and holding an arm up in defense. "A-all I wanna do is explain myself. I don't want to hurt your sister."

"Funny coming from the guy who nearly hurled her into a ditch." Danny's tone made clear how fired up he already was, and Sam glanced back at Tucker.

The other boy got the message loud and clear, and moved next to her, taking hold of Danny's right arm. Together they both had to nearly drag him back, hoping that an increase in distance would calm both him and Johnny.

It half-worked. Johnny relaxed, though Danny remained rigid under his friends' restraint. Both teens knew that if they could see Danny's face, he'd undoubtedly be sporting a pair of eerie glowing eyes.

"Look man, I have no idea what happened." Johnny began in earnest. "It made sense in the moment, but I don't know why. I swear!"

"Bullshit." Danny spit at him. "You're just afraid that your plan didn't work, and now you're trying to play innocent. I'm not buying it, so you'd better come up with a better reason why I shouldn't turn you into a puddle."

"What? Danny, no!" Sam said, frowning hard at Danny's back. "We said talking only-"

"Yeah yeah," Danny interrupted. "We've talked, and I don't want to kick his ass any less. So now what, you want me to just let him go?"

Danny began pulling forward against his friends' hold, only slightly, but enough to raise both teens' fear. This was definitely going to get out of hand. Sam wanted to grab the thermos, but was afraid to let Danny go.

Danny leaned forward, his eyes drilling into Johnny's. Fear could be felt in waves, coming off the taller ghost. It was enthralling, and Danny was finding less and less reasons to keep himself in check.

'And why do I have to anyway?' Danny thought to himself, fists balled at his sides. 'Because they want me to? Why? What reason do they have to protect this creep. He's the one in the wrong here. He's the one who's trying to kill people.'

Getting rid of Johnny would be like killing two birds with one stone. He'd keep Jazz safe and get rid of the annoying hunger. It was a win-win in his mind, and he honestly didn't get why his friends protested so ardently. He figured they just didn't understand. Of course they wouldn't.

"Johnny," Tucker said, looking over Danny's shoulder at the young man. "Does the name Kitty mean anything to you?"

Johnny's face blanked out, and he stood almost slack in the alley. His gaze swept straight through the three kids as his mouth hung open. A hand came up to scrape hard at his face, and soon Johnny was gripping it tightly, nails digging in as he stumbled to the side, shoulder colliding with the brick.

Danny thankfully stood straighter at this, ceasing his pulling as he watched on in curiosity.

"Who's Kitty?" he asked no one in particular.

A low moan began in Johnny's throat, rising in pitch and articulating as it went.

"No no no no." He repeated, his hands falling from his stricken face. His green eyes were glassy as he looked toward them once more.

"It was the only way." he said, voice getting louder. He stepped forward, looking clearly at Danny. "It was the only way!"

"What was the only way?" Sam asked, daring to release Danny and shrug off her bag.

"The only way to get her back!" Johnny screamed out. Anger was now coloring his expression, and he took another step forward.

Sam began hastily unzipping her backpack, hoping that Johnny would stop yelling. They didn't need to wake the entire block up twice in one night.

"Listen, you don't understand-" Tucker tried, holding a hand out toward the man.

"No you don't understand!" Johnny pointed a finger at the three, a scowl set to match Danny's own adorning his face.

"I have to get her back!" Johnny said heatedly. "It was the only way to get her back!"

"Are you saying you tried to kill my sister because you thought it would somehow get this Kitty person back?" Danny asked.

"I have to get her back, it's the only way!" Johnny paced back and forth in the tight space of the alley. He suddenly stopped and turned back toward Danny, glaring down at the boy.

"It's the only way to bring her back, I just know it." he said. "And you're not going to stop me."

"Wrong." Danny replied, and flew forward, ripping out of Tucker's grasp and causing the boy to fall flat on his face across the concrete.

Johnny ascended high into the air, Danny following, and the two were once again locked in a fight. Tucker sighed as he rubbed his sore chin, watching Danny launch balls of green at Johnny, while Johnny tried to move in and land blows of his own.

"Man, why can't they just cool it!" Tucker groaned.

Sam didn't bother to answer as she dropped her backpack to the ground, thermos in hand. Turning it on, she aimed it up at the two, waiting for a clear shot. Danny sent an arc of energy flying at Johnny, who swung back out of its path. Seeing her opportunity, Sam mashed the button, and a stream of light flooded out.

It landed squarely on Johnny, and the ghost was powerless to stop it as it pulled him down, stretching his body cartoonishly as he disappeared inside the small metal device.

Sam quickly capped the thermos, holding it against her chest as Danny landed, incredibly irate as he stalked toward them.

"And what was the point of that?" he said, glaring at them both. "He can't hide in there forever, Sam."

"Listen, Danny." Sam reasoned. "I think I know how this can all end peacefully."

"End peacefully?" Danny yelled. "Are you crazy? The only way this can end peacefully is if I fry that nutcase into dust!"

"Danny stop it!" Sam shouted back. "You have got to calm down and think for a second. This isn't like you. Wanting to beat people into dust? Not wanting to at least try to talk it out?"

"Yeah, dude." Tucker agreed. "You've changed, like a lot. It's worrying us."

"What?" Danny was taken back by their words, his anger lowering several levels as he took in their concerned expressions. "What are you guys talking about? I haven't changed. I mean, beyond the obvious."

"But you have." Sam argued, moving closer. "You never talk to us anymore, like really talk. And you're always going off alone. You rarely hang out anymore."

"And you're putting Dash to shame with your bloodlust, dude." Tucker added.

Danny scowled at Tucker, eyebrows knit together as his gaze lowered. He wasn't like Dash. He didn't pick on other people for no reason. He had a reason to vaporize Johnny. A very good reason.

"Are you seriously suggesting I let this guy go free?" Danny asked. "After what he tried? Who's to stop him from just coming back and killing Jazz while I'm not around!"

"I have an idea." Sam said. "I think I know how we can keep Johnny from running back to Jazz, without killing him."

"I don't think throwing him in the portal's going to work, Sam." Danny replied, still frowning heavily. "All those other ghosts are spilling out of it, after all."

"No, not the portal." Sam continued, looking at Tucker. "Kitty's alive, right? So maybe if we just-"

"If we take him to the hospital," Tucker finished her sentence, eyes going wide. "he'll stop focusing on Jazz and focus on his actual girlfriend!"

"Exactly." Sam smiled, hopeful that this plan would work out.

The friends began walking quickly toward the hospital. Danny was still clearly unhappy, though the other two couldn't quite figure out why. He remained silent the entire trip, giving only frowns and glances in response to any questions or comments. Sam hoped that he wasn't disappointed that he couldn't just kill Johnny. This new aspect of Danny really worried her, and she was sure Tucker felt the same.

Thinking back on her little book on ghosts, Sam decided to herself that she'd have a talk with Tucker at the earliest opportunity. There were some things written in that book that she'd never shared with them. She had honestly hoped the book was wrong.

~* ~* ~* ~* ~* ~* ~* ~* ~* ~* ~* ~* ~* ~*

No visitors that were not family were accepted in the night hours. The three teens huddled together outside the front entrance, coming up with a plan to reach Kitty's room.

"I can search around for her," Danny said. "It shouldn't take long. Then I'll come back for you guys."

"Okay." Sam agreed, with Tucker's nod accompanying her words.

Danny walked to the side of the building, where deep shadows concealed him from sight. He became invisible and lifted up into the sky before phasing through the hospital wall. Sam had explained on the way that the news report stated that Kitty was in critical condition, which told Danny that she'd definitely be on a higher floor somewhere.

He ignored the pull of nearby spirits as he flew quietly through rooms and hallways. Small, faint ghosts, some lingering while others faded, could be felt all around. Danny definitely didn't want to remain here for long, lest the urge to seek one out became too strong. Eating the ghost of some dead person in a hospital was just too wrong. Danny shuddered at the thought.

After a while, Danny came upon a small room that held the familiar face of Kitty. She looked almost exactly like her photograph, if not for the breathing tube and dark shadows under her closed eyes. Several wires ran from various points on her body, all either connecting to an IV line or a large machine that beeped out her steady heartbeat.

Danny made note of the room number before returning to his friends, still standing outside and trying not to look conspicuous. With their repeated glances in every direction, they were failing.

"Guys." Danny said from directly behind them, still invisible. He had to smile at the way they both jumped.

"I know where she is." he continued, watching the two turn to look in his direction. "I'm going to have to phase us in, though. I'm not completely sure how it goes, but I think I can do it."

"Oh, great." Tucker muttered.

"Come over to the side of the building." Danny directed, flying in that direction.

Once the thee of them were safely hidden in the shadows, Danny went visible once more. He continued to float slightly above them as he held out his hands. Sam gripped his hand tight, the only indication that she was nervous. Tucker hesitated, staring down at Danny's hand for a long moment before sighing and grabbing it.

"Okay," Danny said, feeling energy building up within him. "Don't worry, I got this."

"Famous last words, dude." Tucker commented, his eyes squeezed shut.

Danny ignored Tucker, focusing on himself first as he became invisible once again. Next came the two teenagers before him. Danny watched with fascination as both their hands vanished from sight. The rest of them followed suit, disappearing slowly as invisibility crawled up their outstretched arms.

Tucker leaned away from it, though that did little to impede its progress. His teeth clenched in fear as he watched his own body disappear before his eyes. He glanced at Sam to see her progress as well, and felt a spike fo fear as he saw only her two legs standing beside him.

Soon, the both of them were fully invisible, and they clutched onto Danny's hands, afraid that if they let go they wouldn't be able to find each other again.

"Now we're gonna go up higher." Danny's voice spoke in a steady tone, clearly aware of how freaked out the two were.

The ground left Sam and Tucker's feet, and the latter couldn't help but kick out briefly, like a dog held over water. They felt dizzy as they rose up into the air, with no support other than Danny's hands, which they both continued to hold tight. The teens passed by darkened windows as they ascended to the third floor.

Danny paused here, letting the three of them hover. He thought back to Jazz, and how she'd reacted when he turned her intangible. He really hoped that this wouldn't be a repeat, or he was about to have two unconscious friends to drag around.

Danny let the intangability flow out from his palms like the invisibility had. As soon as he felt it cover his friends entirely, he passed through the hospital wall, quickly making his way back to Kitty's room.

Entering into the small space, Danny landed on the tiled floor, letting the energy dissipate from himself as he released Sam and Tucker. They both popped into sight as soon as his hands left theirs, and the two stood hunched over on the floor, coughing and wrapping their arms around themselves.

"Uh, guys?" Danny asked, watching them with uncertainty. "Are you alright?"

"Holy crap!" Tucker choked out, shivering as he looked up at Danny. "That was not fun."

"It was like being shoved in ice water or something." Sam attempted to explain the unpleasant sensation.

"You should've warned us we wouldn't be able to breathe." Tucker frowned. "I would've taken a deeper breath."

"I didn't know you wouldn't be able to breathe." Danny replied, now wondering if suffocation had somehow caused Jazz to black out. He really hoped she was okay.

"It's fine." Sam said, standing straight as her breathing evened out. "At least now we'll know for future reference."

"Hey, I'm never doing that again." Tucker said stubbornly, still shaking off chills. His arms crossed tightly against his chest as he turned to survey the room's fourth occupant.

"So I guess that's her." he said, his voice quieting.

"Yeah." Sam agreed, stepping over to the side of the bed. She looked down at the thermos, still clutched tightly in her left hand.

"Just so you know," Danny spoke up, his tone becoming aggravated once more at the reminder of Johnny's presence. "If he tries anything, I'm finishing this my way."

"Understood." Sam sniped back, frowning over her shoulder at Danny.

Uncapping the thermos, Sam took a breath before hitting the release. A small burst of light erupted into the room, and the form of Johnny spilled out onto the floor. He lay in a heap for a moment before jerking upright. His neck and back popped loudly as he groaned, eyes swinging about in the room as he tried to get his bearings.

"It's alright." Sam said calmingly, holding out a hand toward Johnny. "We just have something to show you."

The man looked at her offered hand for a moment before ignoring it, rising up stiffly on his own. He appeared to be on the verge of saying something, when his eyes landed on the young woman lying motionless in the bed.

Sam stepped away to give him space as he moved closer to her. Slowly, Johnny dropped down, sitting heavily on the bedside. He leaned toward Kitty, a shaky hand moving up to run lightly across her cheek.

"She's breathing." he said, almost a whisper, as though he couldn't believe it. "She's alive."

"She survived the crash." Sam said softly. "That's why you fixated on Jazz, isn't it? Did she remind you of your girlfriend?"

"I..." Johnny's voice trailed. His head bent down, the ends of his shaggy hair dancing across Kitty's face.

Danny wasn't sure how to feel about this situation. On the one hand, he still very much wanted to pulverize Johnny. That part worried him, if he was being honest. It wasn't even for Jazz's safety that he wanted to attack the other ghost. He figured that he was just hungrier than he thought.

But Danny was also able to recognise the grief that Johnny was so plainly feeling, and he felt sorry for him. He understood what it was like to be dead while those you loved remained alive. Though in this circumstance, Kitty might not be among the living much longer. The machine that breathed for her spoke as much.

"She's...she's not doing so hot." Johnny said shakily, his face never turning from the woman's.

"She's in a coma." Tucker supplied, holding up her chart. His eyes scanned over the words, and his mood fell further as he noted the fact that she was on full life support.

"She's got family." Johnny said. "They'll keep her here. They'll keep her hooked up. She won't die. She won't-"

The sound of a grown man crying is not easily borne, and all three kids wanted to instantly leave the room and give him his privacy. Sam shoved the urge aside, and instead stepped forward.

"If you, uh, need anything. I mean, if you have questions about ghostly stuff or whatever, I've been doing a lot of research, and I can help you out. Okay?" she offered, unsure of what else she could say.

Johnny only nodded his head once, practically curled over the bed as he continued staring down at Kitty. Her hair was spread over the pillow, as though someone had combed it out, and Johnny absently began toying with the strands, tears occasionally falling down to splash against Kitty's skin.

"Wow Sam, I didn't realise you were going into the ghost helping business." Danny said sarcastically, frowning at the girl. Why was she offering to help the guy who'd nearly killed Jazz?

"I help you, don't I?" Sam glared back at him. "He's obviously new to everything, just like you were. Is it so wrong to give him a little help?"

"Uh, yeah." Danny replied, raising an eyebrow.

Sam rolled her eyes at him, turning back to look at Johnny, who didn't seem to pay their conversation any mind.

The ensuing quiet lasted only a few seconds before Danny couldn't stand it anymore. He stepped forward, causing Johnny's shoulders to twitch as he glanced in Danny's direction.

"So does this mean you're going to leave my sister alone?" Danny asked outright. "Because if it doesn't-"

"Just leave." Johnny said lowly, head still bent down.

Danny's frown only grew. He wanted a clear answer. He wanted to never see this guy's face again. But before he could voice any more questions or threats, Sam grabbed him by the arm, pulling him back. They along with Tucker headed for the door, with Danny only putting up a mild struggle.

His mind was still cluttered with unanswered questions, but as his anger faded, his sympathy for the situation at hand settled in. That, and the sensation of surrounding spirits was really starting to make him itch. He wanted so badly to go and find something, something that was not Johnny. As much as Danny wanted to, he just couldn't bring himself to attack the guy while he was crying over his comatose girlfriend.

The three of them stood for several minutes outside in the bright hallway, consumed in their own thoughts. Tucker sat on a bench while Sam leaned against a wall. Danny stood in the centre of the hall, frowning at the closed door.

"Are you still mad?" Tucker asked him, breaking the stillness.

"What do you think?" Danny's sarcastic reply came, souring everyone's mood further.

"Danny," Sam sighed, straightening out and walking toward him. "You have to let this go. I don't think Johnny's going to cause any more trouble for you."

"Oh yeah, he's just going to sit quietly in that room for the rest of eternity, not harming a fly." Danny glared at her. "What happens when she dies, huh? Do you think he's not going to try to bring her back in any way he can? He's dangerous, Sam."

"You don't know for sure what's going to happen, Danny." Sam countered. "He said that Kitty has family members. That means that they'll probably keep her on life support until she wakes-"

"If she wakes up." Danny interrupted. "She's in a coma, Sam, not just sleeping."

"I know that." Sam scowled at him.

"Okay, okay." Tucker moved between the two, holding up his hands. "This is pointless to argue over. We don't know what's going to happen, so it's stupid to throw what ifs around. I think we should just leave before someone finds us and we get kicked out."

"Yeah." Danny said lowly. If he had to stick around for one more minute he was either going to go back in and confront Johnny, or start searching the halls for other ghosts. He really didn't want Sam and Tucker to see either.

He quietly led the way down the hall, his thoughts still mulling over Johnny's actions. His motivation for trying to hurt Jazz seemed to be a mystery, even to him.

"Uh, so..." Tucker spoke up as they exited out into the night air. "Who else is up for ditching school today?"

"Right here." Sam raised her hand with a small smile. "I'm exhausted."

"You guys should head home and get some sleep, then." Danny said. "Can you hold onto my thermos for now, Sam? I'll get it back later."

"Wait," Sam said. "Where are you going?"

"To look for ghosts." Danny answered matter-of-factly. "I still need to find one, remember?"

"We'll help." Tucker and Sam spoke in near unison, and Danny rolled his eyes in exasperation.

"I guess there's no point in arguing." He said, looking at their resolute expressions.

"Nope!" Sam replied, her face blooming into a full smile.

"Well...then let's just look around as we head to your place." Danny suggested, not wanting to drag the two all over the city. "It's going to be morning soon, anyway."

It was quiet between the three as they put the hospital behind them, making the trek to Sam's house in silence.

"Hey, guys," Danny spoke up. "I'm sorry for freaking out on you. I don't know why I was so mad, I was just...I don't know."

Danny stared at the ground, unable to put his thoughts into words. He couldn't really say why he had acted like he did, both toward Johnny and his friends. It went beyond a protective need to defend his sister. But he wasn't sure even he understood his own motivations, and so simply let his sentence hang, the silence moving back in.

'I guess Johnny's not the only one confused by his actions...' Danny's mind unhelpfully spoke up.

Tucker put a hand on his shoulder, offering the other boy a supportive smile. Danny returned it, only to stop in his tracks. Just beyond Tucker, across the street, was a small glowing spirit. Its shape couldn't be determined as it floated only inches above the ground.

"Sam," Danny said, pointing across the street. "Try to get that thing in the thermos, okay?"

Sam uncapped the metal cylinder and aimed it as best she could at the tiny spectre. The expected beam of light hit it straight on, and it swirled quickly into the device with a gurgled yell.

"I guess I should've thought to use this sooner." Danny said, taking the thermos from Sam after she recapped it.

"Gotta love that C average." Tucker teased, earning a jab from Danny.

As the two boys shared a grin, Sam frowned down at the small machine. She still felt slightly queasy at the thought of Danny eating other ghosts. But she'd seen how bad he could get without it, and she didn't want to lose her friend.

"Come on, let's wait until we get to my room." Sam said, beckoning the others to follow her.

Danny felt impatient, but relented as he looked around at the growing number of early commuters leavings their homes and apartments. They would surely take note of the boy eating a small glowing blob in the street. He settled for drumming his fingers against the thermos as they all continued on their path.

Once in the privacy of Sam's room, the girl locked her door and turned on the main lights. The normally shadowed room was bathed in full light as all eyes landed on the thermos in Danny's grasp.

Danny swallowed, feeling his friends' stares as he slowly uncapped the device. He hadn't really thought of how to go about this, but his hunger kept him from simply calling the whole thing off. No, he needed to do this. It was just something he was going to have to get used to.

Frowning to himself, Danny aimed the cylinder at Sam's floor and hit the release. The small green shape took form, laying against the carpet as its tiny eyes opened. It took notice of Danny immediately, its eyes moving across its body as they swiveled up at him. It was afraid. The fear rose off it, fainter than with Johnny, but no less enticing.

Suddenly, the thing rocketed off, emitting a high shriek as it flew across the room. It headed in Sam's direction, but upon seeing her it swerved, flying toward the window. Tucker, who was in its path, swung out without thinking and struck the ghost. He immediately recoiled, bringing his hand to his chest and shuddering like he'd touched a spider. He made quiet gross-out noises to himself.

The small ghost landed once more on the floor. Before it could take flight, Danny dove forward, landing hard on his knees. He laid both hands on the creature and sent as many volts into it as he could manage. The sensation of static filled the room as white sparks danced between Danny's fingers. Sam's lights blared briefly, but thankfully did not shatter.

After it was over, the ghost was completely still, and Danny slowly removed his hands. He peered down at the small blob, once again unsure. He didn't know if the thing was dead or simply stunned, but he didn't want to risk it flying off again.

"Uh," Sam spoke up, startling Danny. "I'm gonna go take a shower and change. I'll be back in a bit."

With that, the goth girl fled the room. It wasn't surprising. Danny knew she was against this whole thing. Danny looked over at Tucker, who was still rubbing at his hand like it was infected. The two boys shared a glance, before Tucker simply shrugged his shoulders.

"Better just get it over with, dude. Before she comes back." he said.

Danny stared down at the unmoving blob, it's green glow dimmed in the bright lights. He wasn't quite sure how to go about this, but figured that it would probably have the same consistency of the old ectoplasm from his parents' lab.

With tentative fingers, Danny began digging his nails into the skin of the ghost before him. If he could just take off small pieces at a time it'd make it a lot easier for him to pretend it was regular food.

"Want me to grab you a fork and knife?" Tucker joked.

Danny gave a quick laugh, gladly accepting Tucker's attempt at lightening the mood.

"Naw, I'm good." he replied, his fingers now tearing off a chunk of the ghost's body.

Danny was glad that it had no solid form. He didn't think he could manage to eat something with legs or a face. The piece he held resembled thick jello, and Danny closed his eyes as he shoved it into his mouth. If he could just make it past this first bite, then the rest would be easy.

And he was right. Once that first taste hit his tongue and slid down his throat, something awoke in Danny. Tucker watched on in amazement as his eyes shot open, green and bright. The boy then looked down at the small ghost intensely, grabbing up larger and larger chunks of it and shoveling them into his mouth. Green crusted under his nails and smeared across his hands. It dribbled down his chin and neck in shallow streams.

When there was nothing left but spots on the carpet, Danny's hands hovered in the air uselessly, his mouth hanging slightly open. He blinked several times, looking up toward Tucker with an unreadable expression.

"You okay?" was all Tucker could think to ask. It was still unnerving to have those two pinpricks of light staring at him.

Danny didn't answer for what seemed an eternity. The two remained in stasis, staring at one another in complete silence. Finally, Danny broke the gaze and moved his eyes back down, resting his hands on his jeans.

"That was...interesting." Danny said awkwardly, wiping at his mouth. He only succeded in spreading the green ectoplasm farther up his cheek. His eyes had dimmed back down to their normal black pupils amid blue irises, and they shot to the door as it opened, revealing Sam in a long black nightgown.

She looked at him, her eyebrows shooting up almost comically. Her wide eyes then glanced down at the small green spots on her carpet. She inhaled deeply, closing and locking her door. She then strode toward her dresser, digging out Danny's spare clothes.

"You should probably take the shower next." she said, tossing the garments at him.

Danny nodded, standing and trying to hold the clothes as little as possible, lest he cover them in green as well. He quickly exited the room, darting down the dark hallway to Sam's bathroom.

Sam stared at the door in silence as Tucker watched her. He figured that she must be more unnerved by this than she'd let on. Her eyes settled on Tucker then, and she looked to be mulling over a thought, her mouth twisting and turning as she considered her options.

Sam wanted to let Tucker in on everything she'd been researching, but she didn't want Danny to know. If this Showenhower guy was correct in his writings on ghosts, then Danny would not take too kindly to the things written within the purple book that Sam still kept stashed away on her bookshelf.

Tucker watched Sam as she appeared to come to a decision, moving toward him. Her voice was low and her expression serious as she spoke to him.

"I've been reading that ghost book I bought a few weeks back." she said. "And there's some stuff in it that I...well, it's just some weird stuff that I want to talk with you about, alright?"

"Alright?" Tucker agreed, confused.

"But not now." Sam continued. "I don't want Danny thinking we're going behind his back or anything."

"But aren't we?" Tucker reasoned. "I mean, secretly discussing him and a book on ghosts seems-"

"You know what I mean." Sam replied impatiently. "Danny needs to know that we're here for him one hundred percent, and I'm afraid that if he thought we were keeping secrets from him he'd feel betrayed. Got it?"

"Got it."

The two began dragging out twin sleeping bags, setting out the extra blankets and pillows. They went back and forth deciding on a movie to watch, eventually agreeing on a classic horror flick.

It was nearly thirty minutes before Danny returned, newly dressed and cleaned of any green stains. After Tucker's shower, the three settled quietly down to watch the film, both boys on the floor, and Sam perched on her bed. The silence between them was familiar and comforting. It was times like these that the friends were beginning to cherish; when everything appeared to be normal, as though nothing were amiss.

Tucker was the first to nod off, laying slumped across his sleeping bag, a huge blanket wrapped around him like a cocoon. Sam was quick to follow, falling asleep with her head in her arms and her feet resting against her pillows. Danny got up and folded part of her blanket over her before he settled down underneath his own covers.

The pillow was soft underneath his head, and despite not feeling tired, Danny was eventually lulled into a dreamless sleep. Neither he nor the others stirred for the rest of the night.

"Sammykins!" came the bright, enthusiastic voice of Sam's mother, knocking at the bedroom door.

Sam and Tucker sat up, the former wiping drool off her chin as she glanced at the locked door.

"Yeah, Mom, we're awake." she called. "We'll be down in a minute."

"Alright, sweetie." was the answer, and the clack of heels could be heard retreating down the stairs.

"Um, Sam?" Tucker spoke up.

Sam looked down at him, and instantly spotted Danny's empty sleeping bag. Panic arced up her spine as Sam's eyes moved around every inch of the room, a thousand different thoughts flying through her head.

A faint groan from above had her and Tucker looking up, and they both gasped. Danny hovered against the ceiling, moving slightly as he awoke. He began floating back down to the floor, stretching out as his back landed on the discarded blanket.

He rubbed at his eyes, opening them only to be greeted by dual stares from his friends. He looked between them, confused.

"What?"

[monaisme]

Day 17: field surgery

Day 17: field surgery

“I can’t believe that Mr. Harrington thinks this can make up for the whole MOMA thing.” Flash whined. “Seriously, guys? Camping?!” He spit out the word with a disdain Peter hadn’t heard from Flash since before The Blip, and that had been when he was talking about Peter.

Huh. Maybe things were finally starting to normalize?

“You didn’t have to come, you know that, right?” MJ replied to his complaint. “Seriously, Flash. It’s been five years. Can you maybe stop being so—“

“Hey! Look, everyone,” Mister Harrington interrupted before they could find out what MJ was going to say. “I know we’ve all had an interesting stretch with everything that’s happened over the last while, but this is an opportunity for us to all get to know each other outside of the chaos and distraction of the world...”

Mr. Harrington continued to drone on, but Peter was distracted by what he’d said. It went without saying that the world was definitely a place of chaos—Homeless rates were up all over the globe, domestic violence was on the increase, and suicide rate were... well.  After the fourth stumbled upon attempt, Peter had taken a couple of training sessions with a Sam to better be able to deal with all of the sadness out there. And there was so much sadness.

Yeah, Peter really needed to be back in the city. This was frivolous! He should have put his foot down—

But Ned wanted him to go.

May wanted him to go.

And then Mr. Stark had insisted that he go. “C’mon, Roo,” he’d urged. “You deserve a break. It’s hasn’t been that long and already we can all see you’re over-stressed. With the Junior Avenger training and helping with Morgan and then my physio plus working on my prosthetic for when my arm heals... and then school, homework and decathlon ON TOP of Spider-Manning!? Go on the damned trip Peter.”

Peter had still been hesitant and then Mr. Stark tossed in the whole, “Hey! It’s a Friday morning to Monday night. Only four sleeps, kiddo. If nothing else, this can be a practice trip for when you do Europe in a few months, right?”

’Cuz, yeah. Peter was worried about leaving behind all of the things he’d already left behind for five years...

“Buddy, it’s just a little break. A chance to take a deep breath, enjoy time with your friends... rest. It’ll all be waiting for you when you get back. I promise.”

So he went, against his better judgement, and now, here he was—in a van with his best friend, plus MJ, Flash and a mix of old and new faces, like Brad. Ugh. Mr. Stark was going to owe him big time for this.

He tuned back into the present, “... new members combining with old! Or old combining with old new? Or...” Mr. Harrington sighed and gave up that line of thinking. “Let’s look at it this way. The world is different. Let’s all find our place as team together—here.”

So Peter looked around to see exactly where ‘here’ was, which coincidentally coincided with Mr. Harrington pulling over onto a small patch of gravel and a small sign reading ‘Seneca Lake Survival Camp.’

“Alright, group! Here we are! Right on schedule!” Their teacher called out brightly, “Our guide will be meeting up with us shortly, so let’s unload our gear.“

It took only a few minutes for them to empty the vehicle of their own bags plus the food and gear they’d be bringing in. It took maybe a minute more for the drama to start.

“Um, guys? Did anyone else know there wouldn’t be any cell service out here?!” Flash panicked.

A chorus of ‘What?!” and one ‘We’re DOOMED!’ came from the group.

Mr. Harrington had it all in hand. “Settle down, everyone!” He gestured for them to calm. “First, if you read the permission slips, it mentioned that you were to leave all electronics at home.” Mr. Harrington made his way to his own bag and, with a flourish, pulled out a large zippered plastic bag. “So thanks for reminding me about that, Flash. Alrighty then, into the bag, folks.” The groans were audible as the phones were turned off and collected. “Second,” he called out as he zipped up the bundle of phones, “This is a “wilderness excursion,”” Yes, he’d air quoted. “You’re all smart people here! We cannot have wilderness if we are bringing the noise with us!”

More groans came from the small group, and then Betty gasped. “What happens if someone gets hurt while we’re in there?” She clutched at her chest and gestured to the woods. “We’d be trapped until the guide comes back to find us—unless we’re all dead!”

It was funny to see Ned rolling his eyes at Betty, especially since he’d been mooning over her for the last couple of weeks, but Peter couldn’t blame him as he’d done the same.

Mr. Harrington, however, had a solution to her concern. “Calm down, Ms. Brant, I promise we’re going to be absolutely fine. I have experience with the great outdoors from back when I went to university in Virginia, and the guide will be providing us with a sat phone for emergencies. We’ll be okay. I promise.”

That had the two friends sharing another eye roll—and Peter worrying that their entire weekend had just been jinxed with his declaration.

Flash had another thought and raised his hand, “Sir, I have an emergency.”

Mr. Harrington shut him down right away, “Flash, not having internet or wifi does not count as an emergency.”

Flash lowered his hand and scowled.

Sometimes Mr. Harrington could be just a little bit of a badass.

“Now I’m going to keep the phones with the van so that nothing happens to them at the site... and no, the van is not being parked at the side of the road for the duration of our getaway. The company will be driving the van to a garage for safekeeping, and then will drive it back at time of collection, so they’ll be nice and safe, okay?”

They were all just processing what an actual electronics free weekend would mean, so Mr. Harrington headed over to the van.

A rusty old pick-up truck pulled up behind them just as Mr. Harrington had finished storing the cell phone stash in the glove compartment. A middle aged man wearing red plaid, well worn jeans, and hiking boots jumped out the passenger side of the vehicle, and with an unnatural excitement, he introduced himself. “Greetings, y’all! I’m Cody...”

Peter looked down at his Midtown Aca-Dec hoodie, brand new jeans and the yellow converse Mr. Stark had insisted on buying him. He exhaled slow and tried to listen.

This was going to be a very long weekend...

* * * * * *

Peter would be the first person to admit that he was wrong because, in this case, he was.

The hike out had been ridiculously interesting. They’d examined tracks and foliage and all sorts of cool, outdoorsy stuff. Cody had even explained what to do in the event you needed to, well... #2 in the woods. The jokes afterwards had been hilarious—and they could absolutely joke about it because the campsite proper had an actual outhouse. Yeah, it wasn’t a bathroom with running water, but a seat is a seat when you need to have a private moment.

Setting up camp was even uncomplicated.

Cody had lingered after making a production of handing over the sat phone with instructions on how to use it so they had expert advice, though Mr. Harrington hadn’t been joking when he said he had some experience with camping.

By the time Cody had left to head back to the road, the tents were set up, the food was secured in a safe place, and a water/wash station was ready to go.

The fire took a little coaxing, but that was more the fault of the rain the area had been getting over the last few days—but it eventually caught, so they were good. The ghost stories told around said fire, however, were the best.

“Wait, wait, wait!” Ned interrupted the story Mr. Harrington was sharing. “You’re telling me that the call was coming from inside the house, but how was that even possible back in the 80s? Like- I could see it if VoIP had been a thing back then, but it wasn’t so...”

MJ cuffed Ned in the back of the head. “Why do you overthink things, loser? Honestly. I’m afraid you’ll also believe the metal hook jammed into the trunk of the car was an actual thing!”

Ned looked confused, “It wasn’t?”

Peter took his turn to cuff Ned in the back of the head, and shook his own head in disappointment. “Dude.”

It wasn’t too long after that the group decided to hit the sack.

Tomorrow was going to be a busy day.

* * * * * *

Mr. Stark had been right.

As a boy born of the city, Peter was pleasantly surprised by what a good night’s sleep he’d gotten there in the woods. He’d expected hours of staring up into the darkness, but the wind through the trees and the clean, fresh air worked better than any sleeping pill—if he wasn’t an enhance spider-kid who couldn’t take sleeping pills. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d waken up feeling so rested and refreshed.

The plan they’d made the night before was pretty loose. Mr. Harrington had wanted the weekend to be as unregimented as possible so on Saturday morning, they all woke up when they woke up. Breakfast would be granola bars and apples with a bagged lunch for the road so they could get going once breakfast and clean up were done. Once they were ready, they’d head for a hike to one of the tributaries leading to Seneca Lake and have a little science fun.

It seemed that after the success of yesterday, everyone was pumped and set for an adventure. In fact, the lot of them were ready and on their way out of the camp by nine o’clock—which had shocked and horrified them all. The only hitch was that it looked like the day was calling for rain, and from how the sky looked, this wasn’t going to be a drizzle either. They’d all brought jackets and other essentials in their backpacks though, and Peter was sure that Mr. Stark would get him a new pair of sneakers, so they were up for anything.

Mr. Harrington was in his element, and if it wouldn’t have sounded so weird, Peter would have told him how nice it was to see him so happy. (Everyone had heard about his wife faking her death during The Blip and all, so...) Anyways, it didn’t always work out that a field trip would be such a rousing success, but this one definitely was, so far.

The rain started about half an hour into their hike, not that it had made any sort of difference. Even Flash was being a good sport about it all.

They’d been discussing the effects of deforestation on the stability of river banks when it happened. Mr. Harrington had turned to walk backwards while pointing out a red-tailed hawk that was perched and watching them from the trees He’d stopped to mention the plumage, something about spots, and then he was... gone.

Honestly, in any other scenario, Peter would have laughed at the similarities between this and the old Looney Toons episodes he and May used to watch on Saturday morning when she hadn’t worked an overnight or double. The problem was that this wasn’t Daffy Duck, and Mr. Harrington was not going to magically pop back up and keep talking like nothing had happened.

No one moved for the split second it took to process and then they were all rushing forward.

The word rushed from his mouth before he’d even thought it, “STOP!”

Everyone froze.

“We can’t all go rushing to the edge! It’s not stable and if we do, we’ll all end up down there!” Peter’s brain was going a mile a minute. “’kay, I’m really light so I’m gonna head to the edge and see what’s up.” Then he’d pulled off his backpack and was on his belly, shimmying to the edge before anyone could argue.

He could hear Flash’s grumbling, “Why does Parker need to be the hero?”

There was more coming from behind him, but now it was time to focus. He’d gotten close enough that things could go wrong in a split second... and then he was looking over the edge.

“Shit.”

Ned was the one to call out, “What’s happening, Peter?”

“Hang on!” he called out impatiently, then looked at the fifteen foot drop that Mr. Harrington had just managed thanks to river bank instability. He wondered if Mr. Harrington would ever see the irony of it, but before he could do that, Peter needed to figure this mess out. “Mr. Harrington? Can you hear me?” he called down.

He showed no signs of response.

Double shit.

He looked back at the group. They’d all been taking turns carrying the extra backpack and he hoped... oh, how he hoped that one of them was carrying it.

“He’s unconscious, guys, and I think he’s hurt his leg. Whose turn was it to carry the phone and kit?”

No one answered.

Triple shit.

Peter’s thoughts went to his Starkwatch—the one that never came off, like ever. Mr. Stark had made sure of it when he’d gotten back from being dusted. Peter would never be untraceable again. It would be so easy to just press the emergency alert, but doing so would unleash the hellfire of a thousand suns... or the Avengers... and that would give Mr. Stark a heart attack.

“I’m gonna have to climb down there and get the sat phone, guys.”

It shouldn’t have surprised him that both Brad and Flash had stepped forward, like Peter would let them go in his stead.

Ned was on top of it, though. “Nah, man, he’s got this. Just let him do his thing.”

The idea of Ned speaking up at all about something so serious brought them up short, and gave Peter the time he needed to get over the ledge and partway down the steep wall of the riverbank.

The rain that had been barely a bother was starting to come down more heavily. The rocks and roots Peter was using as hand and footholds were slippery and becoming more of a hindrance than a help. He took a look up to see if anyone was watching. Then, seeing no one, made a final leap to the muddy bank and starting assessing.

The first thing Peter did was make sure that his teacher was breathing.

He was.

Peter called up to his friends, “He’s breathing!”

They all cheered in relief.

Mr. Harrington had landed on his side, when all was said and done. His head was literal inches from the water’s edge. His head had obviously impacted, made obvious by the furiously bleeding head wound. His neck looked good, but he didn’t have x-ray vision or anything so he would only be guessing. The thing that made Peter’s stomach turn was Mr. Harrington’s leg. It was broken, plain and simple. The thin branch that had pierced through his thigh, most likely on his way down, was gonna be an issue though. Yeah, Peter had to take a few deep breaths for that one.

And then Peter pulled himself together and said a quick prayer of gratitude to whatever deity was in charge of small favours ‘cause he’d only just finished his Avengers level first aid training and if you’d asked him, he was feeling pretty confident that Mr. Harrington would be okay. He just needed to find the sat phone that must have been tucked in the torn backpack hanging loosely off of his arm.

And then Peter heard it.

One of the things Mr. Harrington had mentioned as they’d hiked along was the constant changes in the speed and depth of water levels during weather events. “You never know what’s happening further upstream, kids,” He’d said. Thanks to his enhanced senses, he knew that they were about to see an example.  

“Dammit!”

“Pete?” Ned called down, “What’s going on?”

One of the major points the Avengers kept hammering into Peter during his first aid training was that sometimes, even when everything thing tells you that they shouldn’t be moved, a victim has to be moved.

Mr. Harrington’s hair was suddenly floating in the water.

The victim HAD to be moved.

Ned and the others were now all peeking over the ledge. There was no way he could do this without...

Now he really felt nauseous.

But maybe they wouldn’t figure it out?

With a sigh of resignation and determination, he did a final assessment, and then, “Ned, we’re coming up! Get away from the ledge!” Peter yelled. “Move now!”

Ned immediately ushered his classmates back. “You’re clear, Pete!”

It was barely a moment before Mr. Harrington was slung over his shoulder and Peter was scaling the unstable riverbank. His classmates, already back from the edge, jumped back further as Peter and the body of their teacher moved effortlessly up and onto the grass.

And then the water came.

Betty and MJ were the first to approach the water’s edge, but MJ was the first to speak. “Good save, Pete.”

Peter barely gave her a smile before he was carefully positioning Mr. Harrington on the ground under a tree and out of the worst of the rain. He disentangled the bag from his body.

“Ned, c’mere!” Peter called him over and tossed him the bag after fishing out the first aid kit. “Find the satellite phone and call Cody! Mr. Harrington can’t wait that long.”

Peter opened up the first aid kit with its bandages, tongue depressors, and tensor bandages and froze. Mr. Stark would shit bricks if he saw this set up. He couldn’t use this. He scanned the area and then saw it, “Betty! Pass me my backpack, please!” He had started pulling away the denim of his teacher’s jeans from the wound.

She moved from her spot by the edge and grabbed the bag that she’d been closest to. She was already opening it for him. “What do you need from it,” she asked.

“The blue and red kit at the bottom.” Yes, Mr. Stark had a sense of humour.

She rushed to find it, but they were all distracted from their tasks when Ned uttered a meek, “uh, Pete?”

Peter turned to Ned and paled. Oh, boy. Mr. Stark was gonna buy Seneca Lake Survival Camp and turn it into a paddleboat rental and picnic area. Satellite phones were made to last beyond a tumble down a riverbank—and this one was in pieces.

Peter closed his eyes and took in a centering breath.

He was grateful that Mr. Harrington was his favourite teacher. If he was about to throw his secret identity to the wind, at least it would be for a good and kind-hearted person.

He released the breath, nice and slow, opened his eyes and saw Ned watching him. Yeah, Ned understood and gave an encouraging nod of support. He only hesitated a second, and then pressed the emergency button on his Starkwatch.

Yup. Hellfire was coming. But until then, he pulled himself back together and got back to business. “Betty, the first aid kit, now.”

She pulled it from the bag and handed it to him.

“Ned, come help me. You helped me study for half of this...”

Ned dropped the bag and phone to the ground and rushed over, kneeling beside him as he pulled out scissors to cut away Mr. Harrington’s pant leg.

Now Brad had something to say, “Wait a minute, why are we listening to Parker all of a sudden? I’m the oldest one here, I should be in charge.”

MJ wasn’t having any of it and stepped in front of the boy before he could cause a problem. “Look, Brad, I’m gonna have to ask you to bring your Lord of the Flies shit to another island, okay?”

Peter snorted at her response. Geez, he loved her so... wha? Nope. Not the time, brain. Pack it away...

And then Flash piped up, “He needs a tourniquet, right?”

“Only if you want him to lose his leg,” Peter replied as he rifled through the gloriously stocked kit. He found the supply of gloves and snapped on a pair. Before anyone watching knew it, he was also creating a ring out of a cotton sling. “Ned? Get gloves on. You need to hold this.��� Ned was on it like lightning, then placing the fabric ring around the branch protruding from the front of the unconscious man’s leg. Peter made another, brought it to the second side of the man’s leg and guarded the branch there. With a quick, secure wrap, the puncture was dealt with.

The splint was a little more effort, but MJ had found some branches for him to use as a splint when she realized what they’d need. He hadn’t wanted to mess with it too much just because, but he felt confident that it was as stable as they could make it for the situation.

That done, Peter rested on his heels for a second. He’d been most worried about the branch—first because it was just gnarly to look at, but second because...

Mr. Harrington groaned and started to writhe—weakly, and Peter was grateful for prioritizing the leg. But then the man gasped out, “sick,” and Peter was back to work.

“Help me, Ned!” The two boys quickly positioned Mr. Harrington into the recovery position and watched as he vomited into the grass. Once Mr. Harrington was done, the still gloved Peter carefully wiped away the worst of the sick so Mr. Harrington wouldn’t fall into his own mess and discarded his gloves.

If that wasn’t a reminder that the head wound still needed to be dealt with...

Peter looked up at his classmates, feeling torn. Mr. Harrington needed stitches. Leaving the wound open wouldn’t kill him, but leaving it open could put him at risk of all sorts of nasty infection.

But that part of him was hoping that, for all of the panic, they hadn’t noticed him scaling up a crumbling fifteen foot river bank. No one had said anything so maybe? Even the Avengers could be explained, right?—and Flash would finally give the whole intern thing a rest. But how do you explain away a sixteen year old knowing how to do field medic quality stitches?

He gave Mr. Harrington a quick visual assessment, saw the bandages stabilizing the wound, and then laughed. Okay—maybe it was a little too late to worry about that.

Peter grabbed the hand sanitizer from the kit, using it before grabbing a new set of gloves. He dug around and found the rubbing alcohol and stitch kits, then grabbed one and looked over to his classmates. “Um, guys! If you’re squeamish, you may want to look away, okay?”

No of them moved, seemingly captivated by the scene playing out in front of them.

He grimaced. “Don’t say I didn’t warn you!” and proceeded to clean the gaping wound on Mr. Harrington’s forehead before he pulled out the pre-threaded needle and got to work.

Peter smirked as he heard Brad gag and rush off into the trees. There went their mighty leader.

Ned had stayed next to Peter, his trusty ‘Guy in the Chair,’ and held Mr. Harrington’s hair away from the gash. “Peter,” he whispered, “You are a beast.”

“Thanks, man.” He whispered back as he tied the last of the stitches off. “There.” He’d done it. And now he’d wait and see.

Peter put the needle into the little sharps container also found within the kit and cleaned up all of the bloody gauze and gloves he’d tossed aside as he’d gone.

Brad was just stumbling back to the group so Peter called out to him, “You doin’ alright there, Brad?”—not at all intending to sound smug so if it had been misconstrued, that wasn’t his fault at all, was it?

Brad flipped him the bird and chuckled. “Bite me, Parker.”  

MJ stepped away from the others, “So what’s next, Peter?” Yeah, she totally knew who he was.

He simply lifted his hand to show the Starkwatch on his wrist. “Now we wait.”

* * * * * *

It was forty-five minutes later that Iron Man came rocketing into their small patch of clearing.

Peter was on his feet before the man could land. “Mr. Stark, what are you doing here? You’re supposed to be at the cabin! Does anyone even know that you’re here?”

Mr. Stark stepped out of the suit, and ignored the gasps from the kids behind them. “My kid set off a distress call. Do you think I’m gonna sit on my ass and wait for someone to fill me in after all the fun is over? Try again, kid.” He looked around and caught sight of Mr. Harrington lying still on the ground. He looked back at his boy, “I’m guessing this is the reason...”

“Yeah, the satellite phone was busted and we had no way to get help so...”

Mr. Stark walked over to the man and crouched down to assess. “Your stitches?” he called over to him.

“Yeah,” Peter replied.

“Good work! Sam’ll be glad to see how even they are...” and then he caught a glimpse of the leg. “Do I want to know?”

Peter shook his head, “Broken, puncture wound. It’s gross so...” he shrugged.

Mr. Stark nodded in understanding. “Got it.”

In that moment, Mr. Barton and Dr. Banner came stumbling through the trees dragging a spinal board and med kit with them.

“Hey, everyone! Did somebody call for an Uber?” Mr. Barton called out like the goof that he was, even as he scanned the area for threats.

“Sorry, Mr. Barton, no uber for you today.” Peter called him over. “Med evac would be great, though.”

Mr. Barton and Dr. Banner immediately got down to business, but not without Dr. Banner giving Mr. Stark a quick lecture on what rest and retirement mean.

And then Mr. Barton explained. “We’ve set down in a clearing about ten minutes north of here. We did a scan of the area and got a read on the situation, so we’re good to go.” He and Dr. Banner were already working in tandem to get Mr. Harrington onto the board.

Dr. Banner was looking confused as he set about to secure the man’s head and neck. “Hey, Pete?” he called out, “What did you say your teacher’s name is?”

“Mr. Harrington, why?”

“Do you know his first name?”

“Sure, it’s Roger.”

“Son of a bitch!” Dr. Banner laughed, even as he worked. “I wondered what you’d gotten up to, Rog!” He looked up at Peter and then the kids all standing around them. “I went to school with Roger! Huh? I thought for sure he’d end up working in tech somewhere.” Dr. Banner shook his head as he chuckled, “Small world, huh?”

Peter just shrugged, “I might be a little freaked out about this, so I’ll just agree.”

“Forget freaked out! This is alternate reality shit!” Ned couldn’t help but blurt out even as he and his classmates watched on.

Peter looked back at his friend, “I know, right?!”

Dr. Banner finished securing the final straps on the board and looked to Mr. Barton to confirm that he was done, too. With a nod, they were good to go.

“Alright, everyone. Grab your gear. We’re all gonna head back to the city and get your teacher some help. Okay? We can contact parents and guardians on the jet.” Mr. Barton called out. “We’re moving nice and steady so don’t worry about keeping up—and we’ll swing back to clean up your site tomorrow. Got it?”

Everyone nodded and rushed to put their backpacks on. Peter had grabbed his own bag and was scrambling to collect the discarded satellite phone and first aid kit when Mr. Stark came up beside him. He looked at the items in Peter’s hand, “I’m guessing I don’t want to know about that either?”

Peter shook his head and laughed. “I’m sure you’re about to hear all about it on the jet, Mr. Stark.”

Mr. Stark looked at the boy fondly. “I’m sure I will, kid.” Then he looked around the clearing. “You did good, kid. I hope you’re not regretting the trip after this.”

Peter thought about for a second. He didn’t know what would happen after this, or when his friends would put all the pieces together, but he couldn’t regret being here to help. Not ever.

He smiled then, and simply said, “Mr. Stark, I have the best bedtime story to tell to Morgan when we get back...”

 @febuwhump

[ramzie]

I’ve done it to myself.

I've never had an identity for myself throughout my life due to me surrounding myself around people who decided to label with whatever title or stereotype they felt was befitting to me and my inability to express myself. I've always been know as "XXXX's black friend" throughout high school and college which made me felt more like a background character or someone to make other friends look "cool"  rather than an individual with their own personality, taste, and goals. But every time I would try express my interests with passion, be it metal, anime, gaming, dreams of becoming a pianist and author of a fantasy novel, It would always end in ridicule because it never aligned with my racial stereotype, especially from other people within my race. 

Today, I only have three genuine friends who lives miles apart that actually treats me like a human rather than a prop. But even as someone who felt like an outcast, I've never found that group of people or a family where we've all had difficult lives and support one another by sharing similar interests and comfort. Most nerdy people I've encountered were either too shy to engage in conversation with me, wanted nothing to do with me, or never took me seriously as someone that is into the same unconventional stuff as they were since I seem like a normal person on the outside. People gravitated towards me because they found me funny and quirky. But that was it. Just "XXX's weird quirky and funny black friend". I was never picky in how I've befriended people. I was very open to being around a group of people who didn't share similar interests but could learn from them when interacting and exchanging ideas with people of vastly different backgrounds from mine. The problem was that I never had anyone that was "like" me, or at the very least, shared the similar views or morals as me and actually understands my needs and wants. So I would get a bunch of people who would cross boundaries and don't appreciate me for who I am. Rather, they enjoyed the "idea" of me. The idea of a quirky black kid who they weren't afraid to push around. 

I had a best friend I've met in high school whom I was very close with. We barely have anything in common. Him, a white country boy from the south who enjoys the outdoors whose more conservative, and me, a black kid who grew up from an inner city neighborhood and enjoys staying indoors playing MMOs and watching anime for hours. Despite the disparity, we still clicked and did almost everything together. He was a lot more popular than I was and gotten a lot of attention from girls since he went through like, 2 - 3 girlfriends a month. I've always seen him as average looking, but its his confidence and extroverted personality that drew a lot of people towards him. I was never bothered by this at all, honestly. I've never saw him as competition or someone overshadowing me. He wouldn't stop hanging out with me despite all the attention he was getting and would always try to make room in his schedule to spend time with me, and I was grateful for that. However, there were many flaws about him that bothered me but I've brushed past since I was too insecure to confront him and end our friendship. 

When its just the two of us or someone that we both know well, everything is chill. But when there's a group of people we don't know that well, especially with girls, he starts acting like a douche. Like...really douchey. As teenagers we didn't know how to handle our masculinity, and he was the worst at it. He'd do stupid shit like try to wrestle me on the ground, push me to the ground, yell at me, ect. Usually when we're together with friends we know, we'd joke around throwing insults at one another since we're just dudes having fun. I'm usually the one who receive most of the jokes since I sometimes come off as ditzy and a clumsy, but again, we're guys. With strangers, I feel like I'm part of a circus. They make jokes, but ones that hit my insecurities. He would always make it apparent that I'm the only black guy at whatever party or place they're at and say how I'm the 'whitest' person he's met by making fun of the things I'm passionate about. The same things we've spent time enjoying together. Other people would just glare or stare at me awkwardly, while my other friends would just join in the public shaming. It was like they've become completely different people when we're meeting new people. Over time the jokes and insults became harsher and more racist. I know I should've cut ties with them at this point, but I was a teenager, and a boy who've taken an emotional beating throughout his life. I didn't take these insults personally, even if they seemed racist. The problem was that I didn't know how to differentiate between someone who was joking around or just straight up mocking me, and I didn't want to seem like someone who's emotionally vulnerable. I didn't realize as time went one, these instances would slowly strip away my sense of pride and individuality. I was there to make other people look good. But again, I was too blind to see. 

Everything culminated when me, my best friend, and 3 others kids we knew were playing basketball in our neighborhood park. With me being black and being trash at sports, I was obviously a target for jokes. I didn't mind since we were all trash and threw insults back at them. We kept playing until some kid came up to us and offered to play. He was decked in basketball gear and a jersey showing that he plays competitively on a team from his school. My best friend and him seem to know each other and didn't mind letting him play a few games with us. Of course he dusted all of us, but he specifically targeted me. Mind you, he's white and bigger than me. He'll always steal the ball away from me, dribble around me for minutes, does layups, whatever, anything to make me look awful. He'd say things like "I can't believe I'm witnessing a black kid who can't play ball". and of course, my friends and best friend would join in the public lynching. The basketball star continued to show off around me while my friends would yell at me for being useless at everything. Then the player said "come on cotton picker, I know you can do better than this". You'd think all of my friends would gasp at hearing this. But no. They've continued. "The whitest fucking kid", "hurry up cotton picker!", "stop wasting our time", "why is he even here???". The champion would even grab me during a game, preventing me from moving and continued to say racist things to me while telling me to just go home. At this point, I wanted to beat the shit out of him. But besides not being strong enough, I told myself not to get into anymore fights since I wanted to leave that life behind from my days of New York. After reminding me that everything about me is a disappointment, Mr. champion left and we did too. It was quiet. Then one of the spoke up: "I can't believe he said all those things to (me)". and my best friend replied casually "yeah I guess". 

I've never spoke for the rest of the day. Not even to my parents or siblings. I just sat in my room staring at my wall and realizing my place in the world. It was my first time realizing that maybe, just maybe, I might be hanging out with the wrong kind of people. I wish I could tell you of some heroic moment where I finally stood up for myself, got back at my bullies, or confronted people for being fake and taking advantage of me. But none of that happens. Not once. I was just an insecure mess back then. I still saw my best friend back then from time to time, but this time I was a lot more cautious of his actions, and less willing to hang out with him around others. High School finally ended and we went our separate ways. Distance wasn't a detriment to us since we still kept in contact on facebook along with others I was friends with in high school. Sometimes we've hung out, but it was like once every 2 or 3 years due to me being in college and him joining the marines. He was still a dick, but he wasn't as hyper-masculine as before. I was the optimist that believed people change overtime. That if I developed and seen the error of my ways from my years as a teen and beyond, then other people I haven't seen from years would too. Well....

One night on new years, we and a few old high school buddies decided to have a bite a hooters to celebrate our birthdays since we're a week apart, and my departure to New York. We drinked, laughed, had fun, ect. He complemented  on how good I now look and how much I've changed. Then we decided to go meet up with some other people to have a little house party. I decided to come and didn't think twice since I've left all the bad memories from high school behind me. We've went and I was met with a house full of rednecks, country music, walls decked out in confederate flags, and awkward stares from all of them. Of course I felt out of place since all I wore was a leather jacket, band t-shirt and dark pants, but I didn't let it try to stop me from having fun. There was a pool table and I know for a fact none of us know how to play pool. But my best friend decided to try and immediately challenged me. I said 'what the hell' and did. I had no idea what I was doing, and my best friend sucked ass too, but he knew a lot more than me, and made it clear to everyone that I didn't know what I was doing instead to trying to dissolve the awkwardness. Everyone watched as we played, with him insulting my skill. Then he went for my race, why I'm awkward, why I dress weird, etc. and my other friend joined in. Everyone else just kept quiet. Staring as once again, I've became their punching bag. The night ended, and I just left without notice.

 From there I've just stopped using social media or any kind of interaction from people I've known from high school. He kept sending me comments and sending me friend invites on various platforms such as instagram, but I never followed through. I told myself if I was going to develop as a human, I'm going to have to cut ties with 99% of my 'friends'. Again, I should've seen this miles away, especially since I've had a friend before him that treated me like dirt. It was back in New York where I just didn't trust anyone since I was surrounded by awful kids who didn't had a future and cared little for it. I've known this one kid since I was 3 and we've been best friends since. But he has his own can of issues. Insecurity, jealously, anger, cowardice, conformity, ect. He's also a narcissist, like.... a full blown one. We'd always compete with one another as kids at almost anything, but he would thrown tantrums whenever he'd lose. I know you're thinking, "They're just kids". Yes, but now that I have 2 extreme cases of people not changing from the monster they were in grade school, you'd be surprised. He's a manchild, lets put it at that. The only reason I've known him for so long because his family is like a second family to me due to us sharing similar cultural backgrounds. His brothers and friends with mine, my mom is friends with his, ect. He was like a younger brother to me. Of course he would thrown insults at me out of the blue and go for things such as my weight, teeth ect. I used to fear him but now as an adult, I just see him as a joke. He still brags about what little money he has, how growing up in a rough neighborhood made him a 'gangster', ect. What really bothers me about him is that he still believes that I'm still as insecure and uncomfortable with myself as he is, or at least, as I were years ago. These days I'm a lot more expressive in my outfits by trying to dress alternatively, but he would try to make fun of me for it by saying stuff like I'm putting a target on my back for people on the street to berate or beat up for. He'd also use it as a crutch to say that I'm not a real black person, and that I'm just a sellout. I know most of the shit he said were stupid, but I was depressed at the time after losing my apartment, moving back in with my mom, having very little money to support myself, and taking verbal abuses at work. The last time I saw him was when he was getting bitched at by his mom for sagging his pants. After that, I cut him off.

Toxic friendships are complicated, especially as a guy who took years learning to regulate his emotions and was never taught how defend themselves from people who take advantage of you. I've known these people for nearly my entire life and it took a lot of strength and self beating to tell myself to cut them off completely. Like I sad, I've never gotten a sweet taste of revenge like most people do, but all I can do is think twice before labeling someone as a friend. Know I'm alone. I do have one best friend whom I've known since elementary and has always been genuine and thoughtful for me ever since. We still see each other from time to time, but our schedules and goals make it difficult for us. He's also popular since he's an artist, but I feel like he rightfully earned it since he never let his ego get the best of him. He's just as nerdy as me, but he got out of his comfort zone way earlier than me and people gravitated towards him for it. When I'm around him and his friends, I don't feel out of place or just "XXX's black friend" not because there are other black people in his group, but also because the attention isn't drawn towards me, and whenever I feel left out, he would always make the effort to make me feel validated. But I can't rely on him all the time for social contact. We're busy, we give each other space, and we're both aware of that. 

These days I would go for weeks or months without talking to anyone besides a few family members and people at work. It's understandable if you believe that I deserve to be in this position for not realizing that I have the worst case of friend picking skills. But perhaps it's best if I just stay in solitude for now. If you've taken the time to read this, thank you. This is merely the words of a weary soul who've made way too many mistakes to see any progress.

[homestuckhomestuckhomestuck]

hussie formspring trivia 1/?

The stylized battle sprites for Rose and Jack's STRIFE are incredibly awesome! Did one of the art team members create them, or is this a variation on your usual style?

I drew an initial template, and the art folks were invited to continue in that style, adding new animation frames, characters, etc. All very loosely, without a lot of parameters beyond that. Eyes5 did the Jack, myluckyseven did a Rose frame. There should be more to come. This was originally going to be a Flash project, but I cancelled it. Everything happening now, and over the next bunch of pages, would have taken place in a pretty energetic, and much more sophisticated than usual strife animation. Kind of like "strife version 2", for the second disc. I planned this idea months ago, not really thinking much of the effort and time it would eventually require to complete. This is what I usually do, blithely make such ambitious plans, pay the price later, but fight through it with a major grind and honor the original vision. This was a little different though. Not only was this meant to be a much more elaborate type of animation by my own stakes-raising declaration, with more frames-intensive visuals like a typical 2D fighter, but on top of that, the rate of output had been slowing, and the story flow was already kind of logjamming. So I had to make a decision. I could either apply what I now estimate would have been two or three solid weeks of serious effort to make this one pretty cool animation, and watch several 100K people sink into a state of despair over the prolonged suspension in content only to have the story advance not particularly far through a totally radical battle scene, or I could scrap the whole plan and figure something else out. The latter is what you're seeing. Sometimes these adjustments have to be made. I've revised plans before, and had some cool ideas I've scrapped. I was going to include another round in the Dave vs. Bro battle where they used their Sylladexes to wage a hashrap battle (which is why I went to the trouble of making Dave collect all that dangerous shit in his kitchen before climbing to the roof). But I axed that because the battle was already taking too much time to produce and bottlenecking plot advancement. That idea was pretty easily phased out. This is different now, because revising these plans meant I had to change the way a large chunk of the story would be delivered, because a lot of story components were all tangled up in my plans for that animation. So I had to do a lot of rethinking, and much of the solution is what you're seeing now, which is having the scratched disc interfere with the flow of the story, and Scratch taking over narration duties at an accelerated pace while he fixes the disc in time for the end of act. This is in part my way of committing not to doing anymore flash stuff until the EOA, which itself is going to be a very laborious thing and will take a long time to finish. This is all fine. I don't mind turning my plans upside down sometimes, since it can lead to creative opportunities for handling this stuff. The disc errors, Scratch hijacking the site design while narrating, all this strikes me as in keeping with the spirit of the story and the flexible format. Keeping the story moving is important, but it's not the sole consideration. MSPA for me is about working with loads of fun ideas, both for the story itself and the way it's told. Very often that consideration is at odds with pacing. I do what I can to balance both. The biggest challenge in this respect by far has been Flash. I'm quite ambivalent on its role in Homestuck. On one hand, it completely changes the way the story is read and perceived, for the better I think. It brings a lot of the most important parts of the story to life, makes for significant dramatic impact when needed, and goes a long way in making this difficult to classify as a medium. One the other hand, it magnifies the production complexity exponentially, and I'm not just talking about the effort the animations require. It affects everything about my approach to the story. Including the whole decision making process, and not in a particularly good way, at least not from my perspective. The biggest way it affects the process is how it stretches the story out. If I'd gone through with the axed strife animation, that would be an obvious example, pausing the story a couple weeks to make some people fight. But the delaying effects can be more subtle than that. I'll have in mind a certain event in the story which I think should be handled through Flash. I'll know it's coming up, but I might not be ready to launch into that kind of work for whatever reason. Maybe it's too soon on the heels of the last one or whatever. So I'll work on more static panels, because there is never a shortage of plot threads to address or details to develop or funny conversations to write or new fun ideas to put out there. And that's fine really, since I feel like it's all good stuff, but it definitely makes for the long road. I'm quite sure Homestuck would be finished by now if I'd never used flash at all. There are other weird ways it factors in, like certain expectations it creates. Once it gets in the readers' heads that it's a recurring device for the story, they start to look out for it and expect it in certain situations, compare static content with flash, consider how awesome some static panels would have been if done in flash or how awesome situation X will be if animated with song Y. The potential for disappointment looms constantly with increased expectations. None of this is particularly bad, but if you're the guy responsible for putting together this story, you tend to be keenly aware of it, and it factors into the big puzzle of managing it all. And a big part of that puzzle has been answering the question "to flash or not to flash?" I've said before, the deeper into this I get, the less I feel like a writer or artist, and more I'm like a producer, managing story decisions weighed carefully against cost of execution. And cost can mean a lot of things. Effort needed, organizational complexity (usually most present in interactive pages), time delay or obstruction to story advancement, stuff like that. This kind of thing doesn't factor in if you're writing something more conventional, like a book. You write in exactly what serves the story, as you envision it. It may sound crazy that's not what I'm doing, but it really can't be anymore, not with these high octane animations in the mix as part of the expected delivery. I have to think like a producer to make that work. To understand what that means, here's an anecdote about Indiana Jones, which might not be quite true but whatever, it's just something I'm vaguely remembering. When Spielberg was going over the script with somebody, it called for a pit full of lions, and he said "whoa! too expensive! let's go with snakes." So you got Indy afraid of snakes instead of lions, because it turns out you can buy crazy loads of snakes for bargain bux. It would be really reasonable for him to be afraid of lions though. They are huge and hungry and fucking terrifying. Have you SEEN a lion??? Lions would be my quirky phobia if I was a rugged dude with a whip and longing for treasure. Lions. (roar) Why did it have to be... (roar) Lions. :(

What would the hypothetical flash have covered?

It would have spanned the events from a little after here: http://www.mspaintadventures.com/scratch.php?s=6&p=005677 To right around here: http://www.mspaintadventures.com/scratch.php?s=6&p=005740 What took place over those pages is almost a direct transcription of what would have happened in the flash. The events were conveyed visually and verbally to suit the Scratch narration, instead of shown through high-intensity animated visuals alone. The Scratch segment was not introduced as a substitute for the animation. An "abridged" stretch like this was going to come anyway as a device for setting a few things up before starting on the EOA animation. Axing the Rose v. Jack / Vriska v. Jack animation (aka Heroes of Light: Strife) just meant moving Scratch the segment up sooner, to use as a vehicle for delivering the full flash concept without having to scrap it as a story direction, which would have been a pretty significant architectural upheaval. Now that it's out there, we can examine the pros and cons of delivering it that way as opposed to flash. (But note, no matter what, there was no chance of that flash getting made whatsoever. This is really not about "what could have been") Pros of flash: - Would have been WAY MORE RADICAL (frankly I don't care much about this. the rad quotient of preceding flash material is already pretty high, and there's plenty more combustible shit to come) - The idea as a whole would have been delivered in minutes, rather than weeks, giving people the full sense of the story development all at once, and limiting the drag on the serial readers' experience, and corresponding vocalization of those frustrations (would have been BY FAR the biggest advantage of flash) Cons: - Concept as a whole may have been a bit challenging to parse with visuals alone. The two parallel battles are easy enough to understand, but I can easily imagine confusion over the alternate timeline concept as conveyed only visually. People have been confused by less. Much, much less. - Difficulty factor. Even with art contributors. There's a limit to not only what I can do personally, but what a largely unstructured volunteer effort can accomplish as well. - Hiatus-induced suicide pact among readership. Pros of narration: - Get to experiment with a little parallel storytelling, via the top banner. (pretty big plus, IMO!) - Having it narrated removes ambiguity about a fairly cerebral chain of events, while allowing the chance to indirectly develop Scratch's involvement in the story a bit. - I get to take my time with it and pretend to function like a normal human being for a little while. Cons: - Slow rolling the segment page by page has serial readers agonizing every step of the way over every conceivable issue, on points of execution, unwelcome "story developments", and so on. Once again, Homestuck is RUINED FOREVER! Until it isn't, of course. - If you're not into Scratch as a character or don't like his tone or the whole omniscient smartass thing, then you probably aren't digging the arc much. Not much to say about this. It's just a "you like it or you don't" kind of thing. - Altering the flow of the story always carries the risk of agitating some readers. Not only because mixing shit up = automatic complaints (which is definitely true), but because by accelerating the pace to make broader narrative strokes, you are inviting the usual objections fixated on showing vs. telling. But I think there are some legitimate gears of storytelling which involve showing by way of telling outright, as long as the reader has the patience to see it through to its conclusion (problematic serially, as usual). It's a gear in which bigger story chunks that normally are given strong magnification (like a death) are told more compactly and in succession. These bigger chunks, when stacked up, "show", or more appropriately "reveal" an even bigger idea which is at the true heart of that narrative stretch. It's not the event which the reader momentarily feels "should" expand to fill the stage, like a death. The death that with hindsight functions as a building block of a more complete idea which more effectively serves the story as a whole, completing unfinished arcs, building on the themes and such. You can look at story pacing like rolling a Katamari ball, with respect to the granularity of what has focus. At the beginning of HS, I'm rolling it around and picking up nickels and buttons. That's when John messing around with cakes and such has focus as actual plot points. The ball keeps rolling until points like that are too marginal to zoom in on, and he's exploring a mysterious oily land killing monsters and stuff while we gloss over a lot of detail that in an earlier mode would have received intense scrutiny. We are picking up things like traffic cones and bicycles with our katamari ball, while still sculpting a shape that as a whole resembles a story. Hivebent was rolled with even bigger denominations, maybe cars and trucks, gobbling up even bigger chunks like buildings by the end of the arc, as Aradia was offhandedly mentioning how they killed the king and created a universe. With hindsight we see why, understanding the overall purpose that arc had for the story, and how that particular pacing supported that purpose. Unlike Katamari though, the ball does get smaller sometimes, to go back to accommodating certain levels of detail like conversations and game mechanics, but it never dials all the way back. Doc has rolled with some of the biggest chunks yet, like buildings or mountains, casually dropping the deaths of characters as atomic features of his narration. He clearly rolls the ball smaller at times too, when he wants. But this construction too has purpose, which needs some patience to watch it take shape and then hindsight to fully appreciate. And like I've suggested before, these can be pretty disastrous conditions for the serial intake of a story. But honestly, there is no other way to do it. To strive to satisfy serial readers all the time is to do nothing but make something terrible in the long run. It means you can't do much to set up anything sophisticated with deferred payoff, as you perpetually submit what will immediately gratify. I can't tell people that reading serially is the "wrong" way to read it, because this is not true. But there's no escaping the fact that having pages leaked out so slowly radically warps your perception of what is happening, sometimes for the better (community discussion, noticing details etc), but often aggravates (arc fatigue, rushing to judgment...) Try to imagine watching your favorite movie, for the first time ever, but only a minute at a time, every day. Sound frustrating? How often do you think you might get irritated with the director for his pacing decisions? Or his "plot twists", which are really just the products of scenes cut short before fully paying off? How often do you think you might want to insist he move it along? What about reading your favorite book, but only receiving about a paragraph or two every day? And what if the author/director was tuned into the responses to this daily output? Is there anything he could do to outrun the impatience of the reader for plot points he's carefully set up to be evaluated in the minute-space of archival read-through, which the reader labors over in the month-space of serial digestion? Can he do anything to deflect or mitigate their rush to judgment of incomplete arcs? Should he? Probably not. The pages spanning the two links above provide a pretty good example of how serial intake messes with perception, and of why authors tend to like to finish books before showing them to you. Now that it's all there, let's look at the reasonable serial reactions to some key moments, and compare to the reality in hindsight. - Terezi flips coin, Vriska flies away. Serial reaction: augh, anticlimax!!! All that build up, the stair climbing and show downing and coin flipping... where's the battle? Where's........ SOMETHING? Reality: This was only the beginning of a deferred resolution to the ongoing Terezi/Vriska rivalry. The resolution was actually the full sweep of this series of events in totality, resulting in Terezi looking into the doomed timeline to find the rationale and the courage to kill Vriska, which she finally did. All that buildup was not for that one-page deflation, but this full sequence. Reservation of judgment was required, something that is much easier to practice when there are more pages to click on. ..... I could go on but I just realized I'm tired of typing. But really, the list goes on and on like this throughout the whole story. Things which come off as odd or vaguely unsatisfying or even JUST SO TERRIBLE in the short term, but make sense and work better overall in the big picture. You could complete this exercise yourself if you felt like it. Look at an event, remember how you felt on reading it live, and now how you view it in retrospect. Or, for extra credit, imagine you could wipe your memory of the past several months of content, and pretend I just posted it all today. What would your reaction be? How does it read? Do the issues which seemed to loom so large in the moment, like the omnipresent "get on with it" factor, even cross your mind for a second during such an archival dump? And for extra extra credit, imagine wiping your memory of all of Homestuck, and I just dropped it all in your lap right now while you were idling musing what sort of thing I might work on after Problem Sleuth. What do you think? Of it in totality, and of recent events? What is there that wears thin, on its own terms of pacing, rather than that dictated by two years of attrition on one's ability to remain completely engaged and cognizant of all relevant threads? There is a lot to think about when you make a story. Not just in how to make it, but in how it is absorbed. One story is really two completely different stories. The one that is read all at once, and the one that is read over your shoulder while you make it.

[thistownneedsguns]

TTNG Interview // Birthday Cake For Breakfast

I’m stood backstage at ArcTanGent Festival with math-rock heroes TTNG and – first question in – rather than using words to express his feelings following their performance on Thursday evening, drummer Chris Collis highlights the Birthday Cake For Breakfast smiling dog (above) as a visual representation. Vocalist and bassist Henry Tremain and guitarist Tim Collis erupt in laughter, Tim adding further explanation. “For the listener – Picture is dog with Birthday Cake, looking gleeful.”

Having had time to adjust (with Henry suggesting that TTNG would be the dog in the situation, the cake being the audience), Tim reflects further on their performance – commenting at one point that it was likely their best ArcTanGent set to date. “No, it was great. Really great to play in the UK again, ‘cus I guess it’s been a while.” He says. “Yesterday’s response was fucking incredible, like seriously.” Adds Henry. “One of the new songs we have this quiet build up and everyone was clapping along. It was pretty amazing.”

It’s fair to say that ArcTanGent is becoming a regular entry in the social calendars of those with a penchant for math/post/alt-rock and everything in-between. Growing in size year upon year, the organisers outdo themselves when curating incredible line-ups every time. TTNG have become a staple of the festival, having appeared at three of its four outings, matching the likes of And So I Watch You From Afar and Maybeshewill. “We had a break, caught our breath and then we came back to eat some more audience members.” Laughs Henry.

Much like TTNG are becoming a regular fixture of ArcTanGent, so too is the inevitability that the weather will be foul. This year’s festival featured particularly outrageous weather. Almost at Monsoon levels, Fernhill Farm gave Manchester a run for its money with the amount of downpour. It almost made watching bands and drinking beer unbearable… “It’s getting wetter and wetter each time.” Nods Tim.

The spirit of the attendees is always high, mind, and tents are always suitably rammed whatever the weather. Though the main stage has a slight ‘open-air’ issue, as many found out whilst watching Russian Circles a while back. “The first one was awesome, then the second was crazy wet…” Adds Henry. “I remember seeing Russian Circles and getting totally drenched.”

Prior to their return to UK soil and triumphant showing at ArcTanGent, TTNG had been stateside on a run of North American dates throughout August and July with the likes of Lite, Mylets and GIRAFFES? GIRAFFES! A mammoth journey through America, made even sweeter with a number of dates across the run selling out. The secret? “Well we actually have a fan base over there…” Says Henry with a laugh. “It was a good tour, the sales were a lot better than we were expecting – the pre-sales beforehand had us kind of worried. We were feeling like that’s gonna be our last trip out to the states, but it actually went completely in the other direction.”

Sargent House mainstay and running mate of both And So I Watch You From Afar and TTNG (as discussed recently with the former in this interview), Henry Kohen a.k.a. Mylets was along for the ride during their stay in America. There’s an obvious bond between both bands and Henry, the younger Kohen popping up regularly on their various social media accounts whenever they’re in the US. It’s almost as if both bands have taken him under their collective wings, though TTNG jest that it’s likely the other way round. “I think he’s pretty much an integral cog in our machine.” Say Tim of Henry. “He’s awesome to have on tour. He has a multi-functioning role on tour, so he TM’s and drives, plays and techs. It’d be really difficult to do it without him actually. He’s awesome and his music’s great so it’s always cool to play with him.” “He writes these amazing compositions on the fly in the van…” Adds Henry with a laugh.

This is again another period of the interview which would benefit from video evidence or similar, with the trio sharing a laugh reminiscing about the songwriting talents of both Henry’s through the use of a music memo app on an iphone, allowing them to write such improvised van hits as ‘Mummy’ and its sequel ‘Daddy’. A suggested special improvised song for Birthday Cake For Breakfast using said app sadly never materialises.

Away from improvised van recordings, the North American Tour coincided with the release of the band’s third studio album, ‘Disappointment Island’. Recorded live to tape over a ten day period, the trio got together at the infamous Electrical Audio studios in Chicago with Greg Norman, before it was mastered by Bob Weston of Shellac. It was actually in America where TTNG got to shape the eventual album, during a tour with The World Is A Beautiful Place & I Am No Longer Afraid To Die and Foxing. Though the album itself had some uncertainty in the lead up to its completion, as Tim explains. “I think it was good to get it done, for sure. I think there was a time before that we weren’t sure that it was gonna happen. It was kinda pressured to do it like that…” He says. “We kinda just went for it – it’s gotta be done by that time, so… It was helpful to have that.”

“We had kind of finished writing just before the tour and then we used the tour to rehearse the material, get it tour ready so that by the time we were in the studio, we’d kinda ironed out all the kinks and actually learned how to play the songs well enough, with enough energy.” Says Henry. “I think throwing them out in front of an audience is the exact environment where the pressure’s on where you have to get better and play them… I’m sure it led to some right stinkers during some of those shows, but it helped the album.” He laughs. “Possibly another reason why we didn’t think anyone would show up for this tour – hey, here’s the new stuff and it’s all terrible.” Adds Chris with a smirk. “But no, it was a good method. Psychologically I personally felt actually ready to be in the studio, wherein other times it’s just chaos and being really anxious. Sort of knowing that – ok, in theory this is ready, I can play this – was a huge benefit going into the studio.”

Cramming everything into these ten day sessions clearly proved fruitful, though potentially took years off lifetimes, as the mention of their experience in the studio is greeted by a slight sense of dread between the three-piece. Flashbacks of the whip being cracked visible in their eyes. “Stressful.” Confirms Chris when approached on the subject. “I found it stressful.” “I found it incredibly stressful throughout, because the last thing to happen is the vocals.” Adds Henry. “That, for me, is a massive stress. The bit that I really enjoy, which is playing the music bit, was really enjoyable, but there was still this high pitched violin string running in the back of my mind. I was still tense throughout. But, having said that, Electrical Audio where we recorded it is the best place. I absolutely love that place, it just feels like home. Greg, who’s our engineer, is one of the best humans ever. Made us feel totally at home and he’s just funny as fuck. I was having a really bad time doing the vocals, but he’d always manage to say something down the headphones that would put shit in perspective and make me feel good again.”

“Get your head together!” Says Tim with a laugh, before summing up his own experience. “It’s kinda nice as well, because it was a fairly long tour before that, so it wasn’t a very sterile studio at all. It would’ve been weird going to that sort of place after quite a stressful tour. It was really homely, so it was kind of a really cool place to chill out – for the most part. I know I had an easy job, I only had to do one thing, so I had a pretty good time.” “I felt kind of bad at the end of the session, I felt like I was moving out of home.” Adds Henry with a laugh. “It’s got a really nice, homely vibe to it so it’s very relaxing.” Agrees Chris. “Which is good obviously, when you’re in a somewhat pressured environment or situation, I should say.”

Disappointment Island marks the first TTNG album recorded as a three-piece. Following the departure of lead singer and guitar player Stuart Smith and bass player Jamie Cooper over the years, the band transformed and Henry, Tim and Chris carried on as a trio. “It’ll be the last” Comments Chris with a laugh when we discuss the album being put together as a trio. “No, it was great. We’ve been a three-piece for a long time, but obviously trying to play that first album that had four people on it was difficult. So this was great.”

With more room to breath, this allowed for more experimentation, including a new instrument busted out by Henry (though sadly not a ‘Daxaphone’, much to the chagrin of everyone in the band). “Yeah dude, check out the Daxophone. It’s a real instrument.” Laughs Henry. “But yeah, I built this six-string bass baritone guitar that I play, and it was nice to actually – instead of using it to play the space between guitar parts and bass parts – to actually write for that instrument. It was super fun.”

Teasers for Disappointment Island began showing up online in early May in the form of picturesque little vignettes, accompanied by the outline of an island and coordinates. Brilliantly, Fecking Bahamas not only kept track of each individual video but looked up the coordinates online and pipped TTNG to the post regarding the album name (as did a fair few other not-so-lazy fans). The title itself goes back a number of years, with Google acting as inspiration. Much like the artwork that adorns its cover, Disappointment Island was something the trio were unable to forget. “I’ve always wanted to visit.” Confesses Tim with a laugh. “As soon as you find a place like that, there’s so much mystery behind that name.” Adds Henry. “I found it on google earth probably about six/seven years ago, by chance ‘cus I was working as a graphic designer in a print company. We had a slow period, so I would just fly around the planet, checking out Tokyo’s rail networks and then just checking out how big the Pacific Ocean is…” “Turns out it’s pretty big.” Smirks Tim.

As anyone with access to YouTube, Google Earth or countless time-wasting platforms will attest, it’s relatively simple to become obsessed in pointless searches and get lost down a rabbit hole. This became Henry and his virtual flights across the globe, becoming obsessed with minuscule landmasses in the middle of the abyss. It was one such search that resulted in the discovery of ‘Disappointment Island’. “We’ve kind of been joking about it for a while. After the session we recorded with Greg, we went out for some drinks. Tim suggested it jokingly as a title and then it’s like – that’s hilarious, no wait it’s actually kind of perfect. The more we thought about it, the more it made sense.” “It all ties in with quite a few things.” Adds Tim. “I guess Henry can back this up, but perhaps lyrically on some of the topics and subjects he’s writing about. It’s pretty neat really, which is the total opposite of the previous album, which was just random chaos but seemed to also work out.” He laughs.

Similarly, the aforementioned striking artwork for Disappointment Island was practically found out of various fruitless google image searches, trawling through the internet in search of inspiration. The intricate, slightly oddball work of Ukrainian artist and illustrator Irena Zablotska came as love at first sight for the trio, with Henry commenting that the decision was made as soon as they’d caught sight of her work. “She’s incredibly talented.” He says. “There’s some amazing character to the work that she does. We went through and we found that illustration and thought it was perfect for what we wanted.“

At the time of writing, TTNG have finished off their year with a trip to Japan to play with Lite – the cherry on top of a monumental 2016. Their current line-up is stronger than ever, with the trio highlighting this through Disappointment Island. Throughout the interview, the Collis siblings and Henry are joyful, taking the piss and are clearly a tight-knit group. All is going swimmingly then? “We all put on brave faces for these kind of interviews…” Jokes Chris as the others laugh. “Things are going really well. We wanna write some new music I think.” “I’m saving up for a Daxophone.” Grins Henry.

(via Birthday Cake For Breakfast)