#he held onto Chengqing for 13 years and took care of it

[amynchan]

I vaguely recall a take somewhere that Wei Wuxian never actually liked Jiang Cheng and hung out with him due to the life debt he owed Jiang Fengmian. While I personally disagree (and no, I won't elaborate. I don't have enough knowledge to argue it academically within the frame of the surrounding culture and I'm painfully aware of that), thinking about it makes me hurt.

Because regardless of Wei Wuxian's motivations, Jiang Cheng did love him. Fiercely and recklessly and stupidly. Enough to warp him forever. Enough to hate as fiercely and as stubbornly as he did for so long.

This interpretation makes me want to bundle Jiang Cheng up, whisk him far away for a long while, and help him find himself after giving too much of his own worth to someone who wasn't truly on the same page as him (this isn't bashing. Wei Wuxian needs to do what he needs to do. And Jiang Cheng has to learn to live without him and his ghost).

Just... the thought of doing what you can and it not being enough. It never being enough.

Aaaaargh.