#he loves her so much im going to lick the bottom of my sneakers.

[skoulsons]

“Do you give a shit about me or not?”

“Of course I do.”

“Then what are you so afraid of?”

I’m afraid of continuing my failure streak. I have a chance to not fail. I have a chance to not fail with you, after already having done so time and time again these last three months. I can stop. To leave and let you go. To put you in the hands of someone I trust, because I don’t trust myself with you. Because I will get you killed. I’ve failed at protecting your innocence. I failed at keeping that clicker completely off you. I’ve failed at keeping you from shooting a man. I failed at protecting you from Sam and I failed at shielding you from Henry. I even fail you in my dreams. I can’t save you anywhere, even in my own head. I have a chance now to stop failing. To leave you and let Tommy take care of you for a while. To do what I think is the best for both of us. For you to get away from me because I will hurt you. I will fail you. I will get you killed. And it’s something I cannot stomach, not again. So I have to leave you while I have the chance. I’m doing this for you. Because I love you. Because I give way too much of a shit about you and I can’t face Hell again. I can’t go back there, especially not with you. And I’m doing this because you deserve better. Whatever the Fireflies do with you, you’ll probably still be better off than with me. Because they’re not cursed with the shadow of death that follows them around every corner. Or even if you end up somewhere else, it’s better than with me, as much as it breaks my heart. Because I want you here with me. I want to finish our journey. I want to figure out what we’ll do after the Fireflies. I want to settle down. I want to live. I want to embrace this second chance I get with you. This new life that’s been laid out so plainly in front of me, both of us. I want to take you in stride and go and never look back. I want to be a father again, I crave it. I long for it. I want to have that life back, and I have a chance to with you. But going back there is also my fear and it’s eating me up inside. Because there will always be something, someone, who will ruin this for me. For us. And I can’t subject you to that. I can’t willingly run through the chance of pain like that with you, so I have to leave you

[dr4cking]

His Mother’s Garden.

masterlist taglist

draco malfoy x reader | smut | enemies to lovers

a/n : this is so random bye :”

"y/n, come down here for a minute, darling. i have something to tell you" y/n sighed slowly getting up from her lovely bed as she heard her mom called her to come downstairs.

"yes, mother?" her mom greeted y/n with a big smile while her father sitting on the couch, y/n feels like she was going to be interrogated, she grabbed a bottle of water and drink.

"sweetie go pack your stuff and dress nicely, we're going to stay at Malfoy Manor for 3 days." she felt as if her breath got taken away somewhere when she choked on the water, her mother worriedly run to her and smack her back.

"pardon me, mother. but i think i've misheard about what you just said" y/n's mother just chuckled at her daughter's reaction.

"no darling, you heard it right, we're going to stay at their place"

"but why so sudden, mother? you know i hate their son" y/n whines loudly thinking about how awkward it is to spend the day with the malfoys.

"well i met narcissa earlier in gringgots, its been so so long, you know we're very close when we were young, and your dad here is working at the ministry with lucius malfoy too, darling. so we really have to catch up" her mother explained it with her bubbly energy, she did tell y/n how she and narcissa were basically best friends in their time.

"but why do we have to literally stay there? we could've just hung out there and then go back home" y/n frowns, taking a seat beside her father.

"of course not, narcissa is the one who suggested the idea and it would be rude of me to reject it, now dont be a baby and do as i say its only for three days, honey. this is the end of the discussion or we're gonna be late" her mother cupped her cheeks smiling so wide and give her a little kiss on her right cheek before taking her hand and shoved her to go back to her room.

she goes to her room, started to packing while blabbering about her mother, she picked a pleated skirt and putting on a knit sweater, she put on a light makeup and grabbed her sneakers, she doesnt want to dress up so much because she didnt want to go in the first place.

she takes her bag with her going downstairs seeing her parents already waiting at the front door, she huffed.

——————————————

"ah, finally the (your surname)'s here! y/m/n, who is this lovely lady, is this y/n? oh my god, you've grown up" narcissa said as she hugs y/n after she hugged her mother greeting her family, y/n smiles and nod turning the gesture politely.

"lucius, draco! hurry, come here."

both of the platinum blonde-haired men appeared at the door, lucius greet y/n's father, giving y/n a small nod, but draco stayed behind his parents, just looking up and down at y/n smirking making her rolled her eyes at him.

the malfoys lead her family in, showing their room for their stay, the house elves taking their things. as y/n wanted to follow her parents, a hand grabbed her wrist stopping her steps.

she looks up only to meet the boy she loathed so much in their school. draco lucius malfoy.

"not so fast y/l/n" draco pulled her closer, a smirk still plastered on his lips.

"get your filthy hand off of me, ferret. i’m not in the mood." y/n snickered yanking her hand back.

"ooo, feisty. listen y/n, i just want to make a peace for awhile. at least can we try to be civil? i dont want to ruin our parent's moment, and besides that, you're staying in my house, i dont want it to be awkward." draco rubbed the back of his neck staring at her.

"ugh fine, whatever draco" y/n turns and run to follow her parents not wanting to talk to draco for any longer, leaving draco behind who just rolled his eyes at her behavior.

the day goes on so fast, their parents talked and chatted all day, leaving draco and y/n no choice but just to listened and joined their conversation, they both wonder if their parents ever get tired, as the night finally came, everyone already going to their rooms.

y/n wake up from her sleep groaning, she took a look at the clock, it was 2 am.

she rubbed her eyes, her throat feels so dry, she decided to go downstairs to grab a drink before going back to sleep.

"what are you doing at this hour, y/n?" y/n turns around from the refrigerator finding draco who stood behind her with his grey sweatpants. merlin's beard, he looks hot.

"cant you see im drinking, idiot"

y/n close the refrigerator and started to walk back to her room wanting to avoid draco as fast as she can but she only made three steps before draco pushed her against the refrigerator trapping her making y/n let out a squeal.

"you’ve got a big mouth, dont you sweet thing?" draco smirk seeing her flushed face, he pressed his body closer to her making her cheeks heated.

"d-draco i-"

"sshh, cat got your tongue now, hm?" draco rubbed his thumb on her bottom lip, tugging at it making y/n shivered at his touch.

"oh i see you like this, yeah?" draco leans into the crook of her neck, his hot breaths against her neck got y/n to rub her thighs together and draco placed his knee between them keeping her thighs apart.

he starts to pressed kisses along her neck causing her breath hitched, her panties are dampen when she takes a look at his lower part and his hard on brushed against her heat, she let out a soft moan and quickly pushed draco away from her.

"i- i should go" y/n runs to her room, cursing herself, draco behind her just chuckled deeply, satisfied at her reaction, but now he got some problem to take care of.

the next day came, y/n didnt get so much sleep after her last interaction with draco, just thinking about it makes a blush appeared on her cheeks, she threw away the thought of touching herself last night.

she quickly made her way to the bathroom and took a shower.

she just finished showering, putting on a bathrobe and letting off the towel on her head, but as she looked at the mirror, she screamed.

why is her hair green?!

only one name crossed her mind, she runs downstairs to get her target with anger bubbling up inside her.

"draco lucius malfoy! you better come back here! turn my fucking hair back to its color!" y/n yelled, running as fast as she can, catching draco who already ran away from her, without stopping his laughter.

"dont worry y/n, you look good with g-green" draco was panting heavily still laughing, he was still running but stopped at his mother's garden hiding behind it, hoping that y/n didnt catch him here. a smile never leaving his face.

but before draco could react more, he got tackled to the ground, y/n was hovering above him, her wand on his throat, threatening him.

she keeps talking but all he could think about was how hot y/n look on top of him, her new hair color still wet enough to drip the water down to his face, her top of the robe is low enough to show him her cleavage.

he quickly made his eyes back up to her, he would lie if he said this didnt turn him on.

"draco did you hear what i said? turn my hair color back!" y/n pushed his chest back down but her face redden as she realizes what was she doing right now, she quickly gets off of draco but only to be flipped over by him.

y/n was about to say something but got cut off by draco silencing her mouth with a kiss, he kissed her harshly, y/n was still in shock but not for long she melted into the kiss, she wrapped her arms around his neck deepening the kiss, they're practically swallowing each other faces, tongues fighting over the dominance, moans coming off from their lips without breaking the kiss.

memories of last night coming back to their minds.

"fuck- you're so fucking hot. do you want this y/n?" draco said as he pulled away, breathing heavily.

"yes, yes please, draco" with that, draco attached his lips to her neck, sucking and biting making a mark of his.

y/n rolled her hips on his crotch grinding against him making him let out a soft grunt, he pulls away to admire his work and he goes to untie her robe but not before he asked her permission, she nodded vigorously.

draco untied her robe making her body fully exposed in front of him, he moaned softly at the view and his lips instantly latching onto her nipple sucking and pulling it between his teeth softly making the girl squirmed. his other hand grabbed her breast squeezing it, he was amazed at how her breast fit perfectly in his hand.

y/n tugged at his shirt signaling she wants it off, draco gets the hint and takes it off, she pulled his sweatpants down making his hard cock slapped up to his stomach. she whimpered at his size wondering if it gonna fits in her.

draco groaned at the feeling of her hand pumping his cock up and down, her thumb playing at his red swollen tip, precum already oozing out of it. he stopped her hand before he cums right there.

he spreads her legs wider making the perfect view of her glistening cunt in front of him, he licks his lip, started to kiss her thighs before going to her core making her body jolted out.

"draco.. please, do something" draco smirk, he loves how he gets y/n to beg him, she sounds so hot, begging suited her.

he licked up her slit before sucking on her clit, he moaned at her taste, sending vibrations to her body, y/n gripped his hair tightly moaning his name over and over again as draco's tongue thrusting in and out of her hole.

he then inserts two fingers in her and pumping them inside of her fast, curling them inside, his tongue still licking her cunt lapping up her juices, y/n already a moaning mess.

"yes! draco right there! right fucking there.. oh god im gonna-"

of course.

of course he pulled out, right before y/n could ever reach her high leaving her whining and glared at him in anger, draco chuckles looking at her face.

"stop being so fucking greedy, y/n. you only allowed to cum when my cock is buried deep inside you" draco pumps his cock tapping it against her cunt, lining his tip up and down at her clit, y/n gets impatient but draco pushed her hips down to stop her from moving.

he slowly pushed in his entire length inside her, both of them cant help but moaning each other’s name out loud, inch by inch filling her inside. draco stopped to let her adjust as he fully inside her. he wants her to feel every part of him. y/n wrapped her legs around his waist, nodding at him to move.

"god- you're so tight y/n, i cant barely move. do you know how long i've been wanting to have you under me" draco's breath tickling her neck as he buried his face on her neck, slowly picking up his pace as he thrusts in and out of her.

"yes- fuck.. harder draco i want it rough and fast, please" draco was shocked at how y/n think her tight little pussy could take him rough and fast, but he obeyed anyway.

he grabbed her legs, putting them on his shoulder and begin to thrusting harder, rough and fast like she wanted making her cried out at the angle.

"fuck! you're such a slut y/n, letting me fuck you senseless in my mother's garden, dont you scared at the thought of getting caught, hm? oh i bet you would love that, right?" y/n only could mutter a low 'yes' as draco keep pounding at inhumanly pace making her whole body shake.

"what is it? i cannot hear you, my little slut" draco gripped her throat with his hand, pressing their foreheads together as he stared deeply into her soul not even stopping his thrusts.

"y- yes draco im your slut, i'd love tha- g- god please.."

"stop stuttering." draco's hand move down to twirling her nipples in his fingers and pinch them lightly making her yelp.

"draco?"

draco and y/n stopped their activities for a minute, staring at each other in horror, draco smirk down at her while she stared at him in confusion.

he starts to move again, snapping his hips harder, making y/n gasped, he quickly put his hand over her mouth. draco was thankful that the bushes hiding their ungodly activities perfectly.

"yes, mother?" draco said casually as if nothing was happening right now, he quickens his thrust, going deeper and harder into her while a tear rolled down on y/n's face at the feeling of the knot in her stomach tighten and she had to hold her moans.

"what are you doing there, draco?" narcissa asked as she cant found her son anywhere, only hearing his voice.

"im doing some school stuff mother, i'll be quick and head inside" draco answers holding his moans between his words feeling he would cum any sooner, he hoped his mother take the hint and leave already.

like draco expected, narcissa gives him an 'okay' before going back inside the manor but not without the hesitation in her voice but she left anyway.

"fuck.. you almost got us caught y/n" draco chuckles as his hand left her mouth, a loud moan suddenly escaped her lips.

"you're insane draco, why didnt you s- stop- oh my god.. gonna cum"

y/n cried out she cant even finishing her sentence as draco brings his hand down on her clit, rubbing in circles, getting her closer to her high, his other hand going back to choking her, he leaned in to capture her lips to hold his own high, he wanted her to cum first.

and within seconds, y/n came undone, it hit her hard causing her legs to shake, her eyes screwed shut seeing the stars all she could remember was his name when she moaned it out loud.

draco look down at his cock covered with her juices milking him, he moaned loudly and with the last thrust he collapsed on her, spurting out all of his warm thick cum inside her, painting her walls white making the girl moaned too feeling so full.

he moaned her name into her ear sending butterflies to her stomach as he rides out their orgasms. draco pulled out slowly making y/n winced, their mixed liquids dripping down to their inner thighs.

"merlin. that was so fucking hot, y/n" draco said reconnecting their lips, kissing her with passion and emotion this time.

"that was more than being civil, draco" y/n laughs making draco join her laughter too. he starts to dressed himself back up.

"there i thought we were enemies" draco said as he cleaned her up and tying her bathrobe back.

"oh we are, i still hate you" y/n poked his cheek making draco laughed.

"didnt seem like it 5 minutes ago" draco said as he captures her lips on his again as he finished cleaning her.

"round 2 in my room tonight?" draco asks as he pulled away. y/n smirked at him.

"only if you turn my hair color back" and he pulls out his wand from his pocket and swished it turning her hair back to its natural color.

both of them heading back to the manor, feeling excited and new. they stopped at their parents already waiting for them to show up in the living room with a mix expressions worn on their faces making draco and y/n blushed madly.

"im glad we decided to stay." y/n's mother breaking the silence making the room filled with laughter.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

tagging : @dracoscum :( @hellounicorn @onyourgoddamnleft @whoreforgeorgeandfred @turn-to-page-394-please @youreso-golden @dracmalf0y-dm @f4iryluvy @arzfia @slut4dracoo @alexthealexthealex

[bakuhoes-slut234]

Bakugou x reader smut - Meeting His Parents

A/N: Readers quirk is Electricity. Her quirk is very much like Denki's, except much weaker. Reader is in UA but in the Support Class.

_______________________________________________

"Y/N! GET YOUR ASS DOWN HERE RIGHT NOW!" Katsuki shouted from the bottom of the dorm stairs of the support class.

"HOLD YOUR FUCKING HORSES! IM ALMOST DONE!" She shouted back.

Today, Katsuki was introducing Y/N to his parents. They don't even know that he has a girlfriend yet. He just told them that he's bringing a friend over for dinner.

Y/N made her way down the stairs, smiling at how handsome her angry floof looked.

He was wearing black skinny jeans and a dark blue button up shirt with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows and sneakers.

Y/N wore a dark blue skirt that reached her mid-thigh and a white cross-over crop top, along with a pair of black heels.

Bakugou looked up at the sound of footsteps and almost died. In his eyes, she looked absolutely breathtaking, not that he'd ever admit it to her or anyone else.

"Fina-fucking-ly" he grumbled

"Let's go Kat, I can't wait to meet your parents!" She beamed and held onto his arm.

They walked out of the dorms and in the direction of his house. They chose to walk since he lived nearby.

They stopped infront of an average looking house.

Bakugou walked up to the door and unlocked it with his spare keys and gestured for her to come in.

They got inside and took off their shoes. Bakugou put on his house slippers that were by the door and Y/N pulled her own ones from her handbag and put them on.

"WE'RE HERE!" He shouted, making Y/N winced at the volume before putting on her best smile.

A woman with spikey blonde hair and red eyes ran to the door with a scowl on her face.

"HOW MANY TIMES HAVE I TOLD YOU NOT TO SHOU-" she cut herself off as she noticed Y/N. "Hi there, you must be Katsuki's friend. You're so pretty!"

"Um... Actually... I'm his girlfriend. My name's Y/N L/N but you can call me Y/N" she smiled

She looked between Y/N and Katsuki and frowned.

"You deserve so much better, you know that?" She said bluntly.

Y/N's smile faulted as the blonde woman said that.

"What the fuck you old hag!? You can't talk to my girlfriend like that!" He shouted

"I was talking to her. Y/N sweety, you can do so much better than this gremlin child." She said, making Y/N laugh.

"I think I'll stay with this gremlin thanks"

"You better fucking stay with me" Bakugou grumbled.

"Well, at least someone will deal with his shit. Thank you. You can call me Mistuki"

"Nice to meet you"

"Move you fucking hag, we've been standing at the door forever" Katsuki growled.

"Don't talk to your mother like that!" Y/N swatted his arm, earning a glare from the boy.

Mistuki showed them to the table, where the food was already set up and ready to eat. Y/N was introduced to Katsuki's dad and then they all sat down to eat.

The whole time, Mitsuki told Y/N about all of the stories from when Katsuki was a small child and after dinner, showed Y/N his baby pictures.

~

"Thank you for the lovely dinner Mistuki" Y/N smiled.

"It's no problem dear. It's the weekend Tommorow, correct?" She asked.

"Yeah"

"Good. You and Katsuki are staying the night then. Contact your parents to let them know, or whoever needed and then Katsuki will show you to his old room" she smiled.

"Thank you"

Y/N stood up and pulled out her phone, telling her parents that she's staying at a friend's house.

Afterwards, she went to locate her gremlin and found that he had just finished washing dishes.

"You done?" He asked and Y/N nodded.

He wiped his hands dry and then grabbed hers, dragging her down the hall.

Katsuki opened a door and motioned for her to go in first.

The room was simple, a double bed, a lot of hand posters, action figures and some clothes laying on his desk. But other than the clothes on the desk, his room was extremely clean.

Y/N walked in and day down on his bed, just looking around his room in awe.

"Here you go fuck face" he said and threw some clothes at her.

She thanked him with a kiss on the cheek and a hug.

Y/N set the clothes down onto his bed and started to pull off her shirt, but was stopped.

"Oi! What the fuck are you doing!?" He said

"What does it look like? I'm getting changed" she snapped at him

"You can't do that here! I'm still in the room!"

"It doesn't matter, we're dating and I'm not shy about my body." She said and pulled her shirt off.

She looked up to see Bakugou red faced and looking away to try and hide his blush, or give her some type of privacy, she couldn't really tell.

She was about to laugh at his red face until she took in his whole body.

He muscles were tensed, face red and looking to the side, and Y/N noticed his pants starting to tent.

She bit her lip, thinking up either a really good or really bad idea, we'll find out which one it is soon.

She slipped off the rest of her clothes, leaving on just her bra and panties.

She walked up to him, going unnoticed since he was looking away.

She placed both of her hands on his shoulders, getting his attention.

He turned to look at her and blushed, feeling his pants get tighter.

"W-what the hell?" He asked

"Let's have some fun" she suggested and pressed her hips against his.

Bakugou groaned but pushed her away gently.

Y/N frowned and stepped closer again, wrapping her arms around his neck.

He tried to look away from her again but she grabbed his chin with her thumb and index finger, forcing him to look at her.

She closed the distance between them, pressing her lips to his and hummed.

His hands found her waist and squeezed gently.

He swiped his tongue over her lower lip, asking for access, which she gave him.

Their tongues fought for dominance and surprisingly, Y/N won.

Her hands moved to the buttons of his shirt, quickly undoing them. He shrugged his shirt off as her hands got busy with the button and zipper of his pants. She quickly undid them and then broke the kiss.

She slowly moved down his body, letting her fingers graze over his toned chest and abs on her way down until she was on her knees.

She tugged on his pants, silently asking if she could remove them, to which he nodded.

Y/N quickly pulled down both his pants and boxers at the same time, releasing him from the restricting material.

She stared at the size of him, blushing profusely.

"Oi! Don't just stare" he growled, but not angrily, but more needy.

"Sorry" she said and gently wrapped her hand around his base.

She slowly pumped him, watching how he reacts.

His head rolls back as he released something that sounds like a groan and a sigh.

With a little more confidence, she let's go of him for a moment, and moved him so that he's sitting on the edge of his bed.

She sits on the floor between his legs and wraps her hand around him again, this time pumping a little faster and setting a steady pace.

Bakugou groaned and growls as Y/N speeds up her hand movements.

Suddenly, she gets an idea.

"Hey babe?" She said and he hummed in response.

"Can I use my quirk?" She asked.

He looked down at her, fear filling his eyes.

"Don't worry, I won't use it very much, I just want to try something" she explained.

Bakugou hesitantly agreed with a nod of his head.

Y/N smirked but wanted to do it when he least expected it.

She licked his tips before taking into her mouth, making him groan at the new feeling.

She swirled her tongue around him and bobbed her head on his length.

This continued for a few minutes until Y/N finally thought it was time.

She pulled him out of her mouth, making him whine and instead, gently brushed her fingers over his length.

She activated her quirk, using a tiny amount of electricity.

She sent small zaps onto him.

His hands flew into her hair, gripping tightly as he let out a moan.

Y/N took him back into her mouth, satisfied with his reaction.

She wrapped her hand around the part that would fit in her mouth and stocking him, using her quirk.

Bakugou's moans got louder and louder. His grip on her hair, painful but nothing she couldn't tolerate.

"I'm close" he moaned out.

Y/N felt him twitch in her mouth.

She let go of him and forced herself to take in his entire length.

He groaned loudly, telling her that he was almost there.

She placed a single finger, right at the base of his cock and activated her quirk, quite a lot stronger than before, but not enough to hurt him.

He gasped at the initial contact.

Y/N slowly started to pull off of him. As her mouth slowly moved off of his length, her finger traced from base to tip.

"Fuck~!" He growled loudly as he came.

Y/N made sure to keep her mouth over his tip as she let him release into her mouth.

His body shook as he reached his climax, his breath ragged, body glistening with swear and face flushed.

She swallowed the load she was given when he finally stilled and then removed him completely from her mouth.

She deactivated her quirk and then got to her feet.

Bakugou looked at her with lidded eyes, still panting.

She sat down on his leg, careful not to touch his member, knowing that he's sensitive right now.

She placed a peck on his lips and handed him his boxers.

She got up and put on his shirt that he gave to her earlier while he put on his boxers.

"W-wait" he said as she lay down on the bed

"Yeah?"

"Don't you want me to return the favour?" He asked

"Babe, I did that because I wanted to, you don't have to do it for me. Plus, seeing your face contorted in pleasure like that was enough for me" she said and went under the blanket.

"You sure?"

"Aw, you're so soft after you cum. That's cute. Normally you'd be swearing at me by now" she teased. Bakugou didn't even have enough energy to glare at her.

She patted the spot on the bed next to her

"Come on, let's go to bed"

He lay down and placed his head on her stomach, instantly falling asleep.

Y/N laughed to herself and kissed his head before dozing off.

[finastrashcan-blog]

— i need you.

member: jeon jeongguk

genre: smut + angst + college!au

word count: 1.6k

warnings: cheating / jeongguk is kind of an asshole

parts: 01

soundtracks: love$ick, mura musa ft asap rocky + sidelove, astrid s

+++

gukkie (02:24) – you up?

You shouldn’t respond to his texts. You know you shouldn’t. But the bright light emitting from your screen has you rolling over, blurry gaze drifting over the message, a strange feeling sinking into your stomach. You were meant to be sleeping, but sleep had recently become virtually impossible lately. And it was all because of the name flashing across your screen. You don’t know why you do it but you sit up, elbows digging into the pillow that was once beneath your head, and reply.

you (02:27) – yeah. why?

gukkie (02:27) - can you come out? wanna talk

He wants to talk. That’s rich coming from him. Especially because he’s been blatantly ignoring your texts. You quickly flick through them now, cringing at your desperate multiple texts that were all left on read. It makes the vein in your temple twitch, how quick he was to ignore your attempts at communication but here he was at ass o’clock in the morning, demanding you come out to hear him talk. If had asked you to do that a week ago you would have given in, trotted out neatly like an obedient pup. But you’re sick of this cycle now. He was always pushing you away when you needed him most and dragging you back in when you thought it was finally over. He’s not going to get what he wants – not anymore.

you (02:30) – no.

gukkie (02:30) – what why?

gukkie (02:31) – y/n please i really need to talk to you

gukkie (02:31) - ?

gukkie (02:32) – y/n

gukkie (02:35) – can i come in? im at the door

You jolt up at that, the sheets you’d cocooned yourself in tipping towards the floor. There’s a beating in your chest that makes your throat close up, palms clammy as your fingertips swipe furiously across your keyboard.

you (02:36) – why? leave. i don’t want to talk to you.

gukkie (02:36) – can we talk please fuck don’t make this difficult

you (02:37) – me? i shouldn’t make this difficult? you can fuck right off jeongguk you have no right to say that. leave me the hell alone.

gukkie (02:37) – im sorry i know i fucked up please im trying to fix this let me in please

The sorry takes you by surprise. Jeongguk was not a person to say sorry. Ever. He usually found a way to apologise without ever uttering that word. It was one of the things about him that you hated. His lack of concern about how his actions affected others. That air about him because ever treated him like he was above apologising, like he was perfect. In a weird way he was. You should know, you’ve been friends since kindergarten. You’d watched him bloom into the person he was today; from a shy quiet kid who hated losing at anything to the tall confident athlete he was today. You don’t know when he developed that particular god complex – maybe when the girls in your class realised Jeongguk was pretty cute and his locker became stuffed with love letters and marriage proposals. You didn’t expect him to get any worse in university but somehow did. That arrogance of his landing practically all the girls on campus into his hands, like putty. You never expected to fall for that person, the person he became. But you did, like every other girl in this school, swooning over his buff arms and stupidly boyish grin. It was the tattoo that did you in though. The ink looked delicious over his skin, swooping black marks that curled from his shoulder into his bicep. It was so pretty, bold against his sun-kissed skin. Maybe if you had never seen it, you wouldn’t have done what you did (you know that’s a lie, you would have landed in Jeongguk’s bed regardless).

You want to push him away, forget what happened that night despite being incapable of doing so. But your heartaches too much, the sorry making your eyes swell, hot with tears. It’s what makes you roll out of bed and pad to the front door, glad that Chaeyoung was gone for the weekend.

You don’t expect to see him like that when you open the door.

His eyes are red, dark marks beneath them. The sight alone, makes your heart drop to your gut, an unsettling feeling resting in your chest. It’s an oddity, to see that much raw emotion in his eyes. Triumph, glee, joy – those were common. But Jeongguk is staring at you with such wide doe eyes, an emotion you’re afraid to identify buried in his brown eyes. He blinks like he can’t believe you’re right in front of him.

“Hi,” He croaks out, voice uncharacteristically soft.

“Hi.” You whisper it, terrified by how run down he looks. Jeongguk cares about his appearance, deeply. To the point of vanity if Park Jimin didn’t exist to take that title. But he looks haggard, hair a tousled mess instead of its neat style and a ketchup stain on his white hoodie. He’s holding it around him like a child clinging onto a blanket, back caved in on itself instead of the usual self-assured stance.

“Can I come in? He kicks his scuffed sneakers into the ground. “To talk.”

“To talk,” You repeat, trying to sound firm. Your early morning calls with Jeongguk usually never ended in just talk.

He walks in carefully like he’s stepping on glass. You would sympathise with him if he hadn’t stomped all over your heart already. You watch as he sits down on the couch Chaeyoung had stolen from her sister’s place and then pick the seat furthest away from him. When you sit, the shirt that you’d tossed on to sleep in rolls up your thigh, revealing a lick of skin that has the air growing cold around you. Something in you wants to crawl closer, nearer, on top of him. Any position that brought your skin together.

You yank the shirt over your bare thighs, acutely aware of his trained gaze on the ground.

“So,” You hiss out. “Talk.”

“Eunbi dumped me.”

You freeze, skin prickling at the revelation. Kwon Eunbi. His long-time girlfriend. The girl you absolutely abhorred because she hated you for no reason. Until there was a valid reason to hate you.

“Oh.” You said, clamping down hard on the questions rising in your throat. Jeongguk wasn’t your best friend anymore – why should you care about the details.

“Yeah,” He mumbles, pathetically really, fingers picking at the rips in his jeans.

“Sorry. You’ll find someone else.”

He looks up at that, eyes sharp. “You’re not going to ask why?”

“Why should I?”

“Why should you – fuck! Please, stop making this hard for me.” His gaze is hot, frustration making his jaw tick. You want to punch him.

“Why is it always about you?” You retort, voice rising out of your control. “Why should things be easy for you? You’ll be alright, Jeongguk. You’re fine – stop being dramatic.”

“I’m trying to fix what I fucked up! You’re not helping with that attitude! I know I messed up and I came here to make it better. Please, I don’t want to fight with you.”

You pause at that, chewing your bottom lip because he looks wounded. You don’t want to fight him with either but you’re still so angry. You can’t help the words that fly out of your mouth

“What do you want me to say, Jeongguk? I’m sorry your girlfriend dumped you. Here’s my pity. And then what, I roll over and let you fuck me?”

It’s so quiet you can hear the blood roaring in your ears. Your cheeks feel wet and there’s a ringing in your skull. He just stares at you, mouth a hard line.

“Why’d you say it like that? Was that all it was to you?” His voice wavers and it makes your heart seize up. Why was he acting like the victim? Who was the one who was played with here? Tossed around like a ragdoll? Called upon only when he had a use for you?

“That’s all it was to you,” You bite out, shaking slightly from how furious you feel. “Why would I treat any differently?”

“That’s what you thought?”

“That’s what I know.”

He pauses, brief shaky, his hands clasped together tightly. “I put my relationship on the line for you. I lied to her for you. You weren’t just a quick fuck, y/n. You weren’t.”

“But you acted like I was,” You murmur, voice small. Jeongguk exhales loudly and then he’s on you, squeezing you so tightly that you’re paralyzed for a moment, the press of his firm chest against yours making the air in your lungs vanish.

“Why the hell are you so difficult?” He whispers into your skin, shifting around to pull you into his lap. You don’t like how your body melts, finally getting what it’s been craving for weeks now. Your brain can’t formulate an answer to his question, focusing on memorizing the curve of his muscles beneath your fingertips. His skin felt warm, eliciting a tingly feeling across your own skin, leading straight to your core. You can feel his eyes on your face, his hands cradling your waist gently like he’s afraid you’ll bolt. You want to make a home in his hold instead, a place for yourself only. You hope he can’t read the desperation in your eyes. You need him more than you want to admit.

“Can I tell you why Eunbi broke up with me?”

You nod, heart skipping in your chest. He waits for you to look up, his gaze steady on you. A determination in his eyes that makes you shiver. Then he says it, the words you’ve been aching to hear since this all started. Since the first night that you’d stumbled into bed together, too drunk to care about the consequences.

“I told her I didn’t love her anymore. I told her I loved you.”