#he seems to be enjoying the conflict but i don't know if the rest of the party actually is

[reallyromealone]

Title: bakugos brother

Chapter:...4?

Fandom: bnha

Characters: Bakugo, kirishima, bakusquad and deku squad and a few teachers

Fic type: series

Pairings: kirishima x male reader

Warnings: male reader, reader insert, fluff, angst, teen romance

Notes:I lost the ask, so requester I hope you enjoy

🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸

"Apparently he's like super smart"

"He plays chess, I heard he never lost"

"He seems pretty ordinary, I don't get why he's Nedzus personal student"

(Name) Ignored the comments as he left Nedzu's office, his uniform perfectly ironed and his school work organized to perfection as he went to his gen-ed classes, spending the first portion of his day with Nedzu then the rest with his peers as the faculty deemed it important for him to make friends and talk to those his age.

"Apparently he's brothers with Bakugo"

"He probably has serious anger issues"

(Name) Walked into the gen-ed class and took a seat in his chair, staring off as he began playing chess in his head as he waited for things to start "you're bakugos brother, right?" A voice asked beside him and (name) looked to see a guy "yes, I am" (name) said simply as the others glared slightly "your brother is an obnoxious asshole!" One student said "yeah! You two are so fucking cold to others, what? You think you're better than us?!"

"You know, it's impressive " (name) said simply as a student looked confused "what is?"

"That you can make baseless accusations on someone whom you haven't even had a conversation with" (name) said simply as the others looked shocked "you make claims about me that hold zero merit and frankly I think that's appalling" "how dare--"

"I think that's enough class" present mic walked in clearly frustrated with his students "is this any way to treat a new classmate?"

"But--"

"But what? I heard everything and frankly I'm ashamed of you all" the blond teacher said sternly "(name) was put in your class hoping you all would give him a warm welcome and you berated him for actions of another"

The students looked ashamed and (name) was awkward, fidgeting with his mechanical pencil as the others mumbled out apologies and the blond sighed "now pull out your textbooks to page 138"

When classes ended, (name) had a free study period and decided to go to the courtyard to play some chess by himself and get away from it all, he felt just as lonely as he did at his old school but he should have expected to be in his brothers shadow here as well.

"Hey... Uh were sorry about what happened" a few students came up, a purple haired teen and two others "it was pretty shitty of us to put that on you, that wasn't cool" the teens mumbled and (name) shrugged "I'm used to it"

"You shouldn't have to be though and it's uncool"

"Shinso Hitoshi" the purple haired teen offered and (name) looked at them passively "Bakugo (name)" his voice always so calm and collected as they nodded "so you play chess?" One student asked and (name) nodded "outside of school, I'm a professional chess player"

"Whoa! That's so cool! Is that why you're Nedzu's student?"

"Actually it's due to my quirk, I have an intelligence quirk" (name) explained and the three sat with him "whoa those are super rare!" The other said and Shinso looked curious about it "why didn't you apply earlier?" Shinso asked before realizing that was probably insensitive and (name) shrugged "didn't think I would be able, two students already got into here... A third seemed impossible" it was a lie but they seemed to accept it.

"So what's it like being Nedzu's student?!"

After classes, Kirishima was excited to see his boyfriend as the two hadn't seen each other in a few days due to conflicting schedules but now they could! Even if half the class wanted to join as well.

"I brought a friend" (name) said simply as shinso looked awkward, kirishima feeling pride at his boyfriend making friends independent of the redhead "oh! You're the one going through the transfer!" Momo said excitedly "yeah the one replacing mineta!" Ochaco cheared "and right before the sports festival! Oh we can train together!"

Hitoshi was startled a bit as he noticed Midoriya who was a calming presence "come on! Aizawa is only letting us out till 845! We only have like five hours!" Mina yelled as Bakugo grunted at her dragging him.

Hitoshi was dragged into conversation with tenya and kaminari about god knows what as Kirishima and a few others chatted away, leaving the Bakugo siblings to walk beside each other awkwardly "how's heroics" (name) said in more of a statement, uncomfortable as he tried to make small talk with his brother "fine" Bakugo grunted as Kirishima went with tsu and Ochaco "babe I'll be right back! Don't follow I want it to be a surprise!"

And then the siblings were left alone as the group seperated to grab the things they needed or wanted and to meet up after for food.

"You two seem happy" Bakugo was rarely soft, the concept of him being calm and tentative was something that would be laughable to anyone who knew him "he makes me happy, I hope I make him feel the same" (name) said simply and Bakugo make a soft hum "I'm glad you're at U.A"

"Didn't you not want me here?" (Name) Looked at Katsuki as they stopped walking"fucking--- I know I was shitty, dad's making me go to therapy with hound dog" this was new, something he didn't expect at all.

"Dad's fed up with the hag, he's forcing basically everyone to therapy so expect a call"

The two sat on a bench, small talk between them as they waited for their friends to come back.

It was strange for Katsuki to say he was finally meeting his brother, on equal grounds and no hostility but Katsuki needed this.

He needed his brother.

"BABE LOOK WHAT I FOUND!" Kirishima barreled in with bracelets "look, it has chess pieces! And you can customize it so I added a barbell!" Kirishima said excitedly as he handed (name) one and the calmer Bakugo took it curiously "this is cheesy" he said simply but the small smile as he put on it made kirishima fly to cloud nine.

Bakugo was surprised that his brother had such an interest like origami, seeming genuinely happy with the variety pack of designs "oo make me a brid!" Kirishima teased and (name) took that seriously and they could see the gears turn in his head.

(Name) Was happy when he returned to his form, putting the bracelet in a safe area with his other important items and sat down, thinking About the conversation he had... Bakugo apologized...

He had to talk to kirishima tomorrow about this.

"Hey shitty hair,.can I talk?"

[moogle-mafia]

not me worrying whether my new dnd character actually gets to have some character development in this campaign or i'll have to drop the entire act before the party loses their patience 💀

i had a disagreement with two people over two slightly varying issues in one session already and i don't know what to do, because their characters' behaviour just seems a bit hypocritical to my character.

tl;dr: 2 clerics, a wizard, and a paladin. the paladin is neutral, the wizard is pretty chill about things, but the clerics tend to prioritise protecting the corpses from being eaten over helping the living (at least these are her first assumptions).

she is not the best, i admit. i made a petty, grumpy assassin with trust issues and a weird weak spot for outcasts. basically someone who says 'i will steal from people that annoy me with their illogical (to me) self-righteousness, but i will try to lessen other people's burdens if no one else wants to help'. aaand we got to that one basement scene in the curse of strahd. and my character did something really stupid out of pity. and antagonised a cleric or two in the process, because she got into an argument about it and said a few things to a party member that sounded like a threat.

now, i am on the fence. i can either decide i won't budge (but i already heard a comment that my character is not really likeable right now and it got me a little worried), or just drop everything i planned for this character just because i don't want the party to leave her. and i'm not entirely sure that the party will take time to shake some sense into her, or will just assume she's not worth the effort. i could just do a 180 and be like 'yeah sorry i am starting to learn please give me a chance' instantly, but i would rather go balls to the wall... and after the fight have a dramatic scene of learning that it's okay to ask for help and to rely on others. and maybe a promise that she will learn and work on herself a bit.

but! i am worried that the party won't take the hint to simply force my character to sit down and explain what is wrong with her. i've never played a morally complicated character before, so i don't know if the hints i am dropping are actually doing something. i assume that they are not, since me having a stupid idea on session 2 was interpreted as 'yeah she just wants to see what happens, that's not pity' at least once. i guess they assume things based on the fact that my character stole some stuff from an npc's house, but she didn't tell them about it. also, she haven't really had a chance to use these spoils yet. i was thinking about her splurging all that on the gear the party might need, but i we haven't found a shop yet.

i might be overthinking all of this, this might be also my longest post i ever made on this website, but i guess i needed a space to write this all down.

i know i made this character to challenge myself, because i usually play as neutral/chaotic good pranksters, but this is a party that seems to be mostly lawful and i don't know if i didn't cause problems too early in the game. to be honest, i am enjoying the roleplay a lot, it's different from what i used to do in dnd, but i'm still worried that all of this will estrange me from the group... so... yeah hey hi anne of xiety it's been a while now we're worried even about dnd. it's been literally 2 sessions, why am i so worried about this

[imarealnugget]

Ryomen Sukuna when he's jealous

Feat. Sukuna Ryomen, female reader

TW. smut, jealousy, mention of words "pussy","cock" etc.. JealousSukuna!xfemale!reader

Words Count: 1k

Synopsis: You and Sukuna have been dating for just over a year, and one day you met another guy, with whom you immediately bonded. Sukuna didn't hide his high jealousy, but one day, after seeing you hugged your friend goodbye, Sukuna decided to show his jealousy once you got home, talking to you, provoking you, giving the appearance of being calm, in order to intimidate you, finally to punish you, he decides to fuck you until you have understood that you're his and only his.

Hiii, before starting with the fanfic, I wanna apologise to everyone for my absence, now I'm back with other stories, don't worry ^^

You and Sukuna, a couple that had gone through a year of ups and downs. Your relationship was like a wild flame, fueled by the intensity of your personalities. Sukuna, with his aura of danger and his provocative gaze, had always been the type of person who attracted attention. But with you, it was different. You were an explosive mix of desire and conflict. One day, during an evening in the city, you met a boy who immediately caught your attention. His carefree personality and casual attitude made you approach him immediately. Sukuna, with his unwavering jealousy, didn't fail to notice your new friendship. His sharp gaze rested on you both, and you could perceive his jealousy in every single movement. Over time, your relationship with the new friend solidified, and Sukuna did nothing to hide his disgust. Sukuna's jealousy was like a burning fire inside him, fueled by his innate possessiveness. With every smile you directed towards your friend, his expression became darker and darker.

One afternoon, as your friend walked away, you approached him for a farewell hug. It was at that moment that Sukuna decided to let his jealousy emerge in all its intensity. When you returned home, his provocation began without delay. "Your new friend seems to enjoy your company a lot," he said, a mischievous smirk on his features. The tone of his voice was calm, but his gaze burned with desire and possessiveness. They began a sort of dangerous game, a dance of sharp words and piercing eyes. Sukuna provoked with his seductive attitude, trying to elicit a reaction from you. "Don't tell me there's something between you two. I would be jealous, you know?" he whispered, his voice a subtle poison of desire. As the evening progressed, Sukuna continued to weave his web, igniting his jealousy in increasingly provocative ways. He approached you with a burning gaze and a devilish smile. "I wonder what you can do to make me jealous," he said, his eyes scrutinizing yours as if he wanted to read every reaction. The tension increased, but somehow, your response was a silent challenge. You accepted the game, responding to his provocations with a mischievous smile. Sukuna, despite showing an enviable confidence, couldn't completely hide his burning jealousy. When they finally reached a stalemate, Sukuna decided to lay all his cards on the table. "I don't like sharing you with anyone else," he admitted, his tone now more serious, but still full of provocation. "You're mine, understood?" Your response was a simple smile, a mixture of complicity and challenge. It was as if you had established a balance between you, a dangerous game of desire and jealousy that made your relationship even more intense.

The night continued with a burning passion, as if the confrontation had ignited an even greater flame between you: one hour later, you were sitting on the top of him, riding is cock so hardly that the only sound that you two heard was his balls smashing against the fat of your ass. “Kuna.. you feel so f-fucking good!” you tried to say without moaning and rolling your eyes back in your head, failing mercilessly. “I know, that’s because i’m better than that mother fucker that you call “friend” ‘y know that, huh?” Those words came out from his mouth voluntarily, while he was watching you loosing your mind of him and for his fat cock. “You wanna cum, don’t you? Oooh, but bad girls can’t cum so easily after what they did, right?” “F-fuck Kuna.. let’s be serious: I did nothing wron- ahh fuck-”. He didn’t let you finish your words that he smashed your clit hardly, before teasing it with his two fingers. “Oh, you did nothing wrong? Are you sure ‘bout that?” And you didn’t answer, leading your tired head on his shoulder, while his fingers digged in your hips, guiding and helping them while riding his cock fastly. “Look at me.” He demanded, but you didn’t have more energies: when he fucks you your body is vulnerable, you always give all of yourself to him, your body and your will. “I said look at me.” He grabs your chin, forcing you to look at him. “Listen carefully: i’m going to cum deep inside of you, if you won’t let any of my cum drip from your pussy, I will let you cum, alright?” “But Kun- mmh..” He slides two of his fingers in your mouth, forcing you to close your eyes and drool. “Shh, doll, you’re mine, remember? So you will do everything I say, understand?” He whispers in your ear with a smirk on his face and all you can do is saying yes moving your head gently. After some seconds, you became the toy that Sukuna was using to pleasure himself and made himself cum inside of you. “Fuck y/n, i’m cumming-” He warns before shooting much hot cum deep inside your folds. When he slowly slides his dick away from your pussy, you did everything you could do to make sure that nothing came out from your cunt. Sukuna also laughed while watching you doing everything you could, even if you were tired as fuck. “That’s a good girl. Ready to cum?” “Yes, pleaseplease..” You beg, tired of that day, even though you were so much excited. Then Sukuna slides one, two.. three fingers inside of you without any warning, so you gasped, almost closing your legs, but he kept them spread apart with his big, veiny hand. His fingers were working perfectly inside of you, and in few minutes you felt your cum close. “Kuna.. i’m cumming, oh fuck- cummingcumming.. Sukuna-!” You moan and whimper, impatient to cum, then you cream all over his fingers, leaving a smirk on his face. “Mhh, you screamed my name before cumming, not your friend’s..” and that’s all you heard before diving yourself in a long sleep of nine hours, after that day full of feelings.

[missnxthingg]

𝐃𝐄𝐋𝐈𝐂𝐀𝐓𝐄 - 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐏𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐅𝐎𝐔𝐑

𝐏𝐀𝐈𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆 - Lando Norris x Actress!Reader (Enemies to Lovers & Fake Dating AU) 𝐒𝐔𝐌𝐌𝐀𝐑𝐘 - Lando Norris really messed up on the first time meeting one of Hollywood's newest and hottest stars, Y/N L/N. But when his reputation gets too bad, she might be the only one who can save his career from being completely doomed. 𝐖𝐎𝐑𝐃𝐒 - 4.5K | 𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒 - SMUT & swearing 𝐀𝐔𝐓𝐇𝐎𝐑'𝐒 𝐍𝐎𝐓𝐄𝐒 - Four is our lucky number, so let's spice things up! As I wrote this, I could only think about the song Conflicted by Halestorm (pardon the hard rock). Hope you enjoy this one!

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𝐅𝐎𝐔𝐑 - 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐅𝐋𝐈𝐂𝐓𝐄𝐃

Lando woke up a little lost the following morning. His cheek was pressed to the top of Y/N's head and his arms were loosely still around her waist. She was still deep into sleep when he opened his eyes. Too afraid to wake her up and having to face an awkward conversation, he stood very still, taking the first minutes of his day to look at her and think.

Whatever happened between them yesterday was weird, to say the least. People don't simply go from hating each other to being vulnerable and sharing a bed in a matter of hours. He didn't know what had got into them and it scared him how much he enjoyed the moments they shared the previous night. It scared him how good it felt to be vulnerable to her. And the feeling he got on his chest every time he looked at her was the most terrifying of them all.

Feeling a clench on his chest, Lando carefully slipped out of bed and changed into fresh clothes, did his entire morning routine and, in less than 15 minutes later, he was downstairs in the restaurant for some breakfast. Since it was so early, and everyone was still tired from the weekend, he managed to sit alone and think. The last thing he needed was company.

Eventually, the hotel started to get crowded, and a few fans were starting to recognize him among the people at the restaurant. Feeling cranky, he thought it was best for him to go back to his room and get ready for his flight later that day. Zak had already texted him, saying he hoped to have a meeting on the flight. So he needed to rest his mind.

Lando hadn't decided how to behave around Y/N yet. She was woken up by the time he arrived, but was having a shower while he was gone. He packed everything he needed while she kept the bathroom busy. She only came out ten minutes later, dressed in comfortable clothes for the flight.

“Good morning”, she opened a small smile for Lando, who didn't retribute it. 

“Morning”, he mumbled, taking his needed things for a shower.

Y/N was surprised with his behaviour, but decided not to comment on it. Who the fuck goes from cuddling to no reaction in only a few hours? Only someone as complicated as Lando Norris. 

“At what time we'll be leaving?”, she ignored how he acted and decided to act just as cold.

“We have to be at the airport at one”, he said and Y/N only nodded to his response.

But she just couldn't help herself. “Are you alright?”

“Yeah. Fine”, he shrugged before locking himself in the bathroom.

The rest of the trip was exactly like that. Y/N only heard Lando's voice when necessary. He only shifted his mood during the meeting he had with Zak on the plane. Not very interested in talking about racing, she chose to put on her earpods and drift away into music.

They only met again a week later, when Y/N was invited to attend the Cannes Film Festival. To not make it seem like their relationship was one-sided, they took advantage that his off weekend was supposed to be during the event. Lando met her in France, where they had booked a suite with two rooms this time, so they would only have to meet in common areas such as the living and dining room. 

What surprised Y/N was that Lando was back to his asshole behaviour once again.

“You never, ever shut up, do you?”, he sighed, taking a spot on the living room's couch.

"I'm just saying that we're late for a brunch and you're fucking sitting down, Norris", she folded her arms and puffed her chest, making sure he knew how upset she was.

"I'm not required to be at this brunch. Just need to be with you at the red carpet", Lando put his feet up on the coffee table and turned the TV on, pretending not to care. Y/N promptly removed his feet from the table.

“What the fuck is wrong with you? I literally always go out of my schedule, fly out away from home, just to be at your goddamn work events, and you can't do the same for me?”

"We're not a real couple, Y/N. I don't know if you realized that", Lando squinted his eyes as he spat out the words. Words to which were daggers right across her chest.

She didn't know why it pained her so much to hear those words; to see how aggressive he was behaving. That was not the same Lando that a week ago begged for her to comfort him and pulled her closer before falling asleep. He wasn't the bubbly and happy Lando Norris she saw on track.

Trying to fight back some tears, Y/N turned her back and retreated to her room. “You do you, Norris. I'm gonna finish getting ready because, contrary to you, I care about my career”.

She had to fight really hard to not call his PR team and call this whole thing off. Lando wasn't committing to his part of the agreement, so she didn't feel like it was fair. But she washed her face, took a deep breath and got ready for brunch. By the time she was out the room, Lando was waiting dressed in a linen button up and short's, perfect for a casual spring day.

Y/N didn't say anything and carried on her way out, him right behind her. When they got to the hotel lobby, they put on their little show, with his hand on the small of her back and opening doors for her. Later that day on the internet, people were melting with the pictures of them in line for brunch, with the sweet kisses being shared between them.

But the real commotion came on the next day, when they attended a Martin Scorsese film premiere, looking like the hottest couple in Cannes. Lando dressed up in a beautiful and classic black suit, while Y/N chose a draped baby pink dress that made her feel like a goddess. When she came out of her room after hours with stylists, makeup artists and hairdressers, Lando felt the air being knocked out of his lungs and he did his best at pretending not to care.

Their fans, on the other hand, cared too much. Their names climbed up to worldwide trending topics; their picture on the red was all over Instagram. People loved how amazing they looked together. Lando and VN really could be a breathtaking couple if they were actually together. It was the perfect combo: the rising star and the sunshine athletic boy.

“A match made in hell”, he whispered in her ear as all the cameras blinded them with the flashes.

"I fucking hate you", she whispered back, and Lando felt like those words were a stab right in his chest.

Of course he knew Y/N hated him. He himself has made sure those feelings were known. But this is the first time he's heard it since the night they shared in Miami. Why does he now care that she hates him?

The words flowed so easily out of her mouth. She was angry at him. Absolutely livid by his behaviour on the previous day, or the fact that he simply pretended the last grand prix didn't happen. So if Lando was going to be petty, two can play this game.

The entire night was filled with snarky comments. Lando made sure to show how he wasn't enjoying the premiere, and Y/N had a comment for every comma that came out of his mouth. She could say anything to try pissing him off. What was making Lando angry, on the other hand, was seeing other men looking her up and down, just like a piece of meat. Didn't they have anything else better to do?

After Y/N spent good ten minutes talking to a very hot model, who was flirting with her the whole time, Lando gave up on waiting for him to leave and approached them, letting his hand go around her waist, securing her close to his body.

“Jesus, don't they realize you're taken?”, Lando mumbled, as he frowned at the model, now long gone.

"I thought we weren't a real couple. So there's nothing wrong with other men flirting with me", she provoked, feeling his fingers tighten around her waist.

“There is when, publicly, you're still mine. Or don’t you remember my one and only rule?”, you could see the red creeping up his neck. Was he actually jealous? It can't be.

“You really are a book I can't read”, she sighed, making an exit towards the theatre where the movie would be exhibited.

Thank God for long movies, because they wouldn't have to listen to each other's voices for three hours. But after a standing ovation once the credit's started rolling up, Y/N proceeded to try talking to as many people as she could at the cocktail party after the session. At the end of the day, she had talked to really important directors and producers, who in the future might think of her while doing a new project.

Lando, on the other hand, stood by her side and looked bored. He hated the film, thinking it was too conceptual for his liking, not to mention too long for a fucking boring plot. Y/N was getting angry at his behaviour and was making their deal go through the sky.

“I swear to God, if you keeping doing this, I'll call our team and end this whole fucking thing”, she complained, making him roll his eyes.

“Fuck off, you're still full on flirting with other men in front of me. I'm not the only one fucking this agreement”, by that time, they were alone in a secluded area of the party.

“What the fuck is wrong with you? Norris, I'm working, not flirting, for fuck’s sake. This is the same thing as talking to sponsors. I'm not fucking flirting with any of them”, she was visibly angry at his behaviour.

“Well, it doesn't look like it”.

The fight was taken back to their hotel room and they did their best to make their discussion go unnoticed by other people. But once the doors were closed, they fought like they were married with children.

“This is disrespectful”, Lando shot when they brought up the men she talked to through the night.

“It's work, Norris. I don't know why you're so fucking jealous”.

“Because, we're in a goddamn relationship, Y/N. You can't go out all flirting with other men”.

“You said yourself we weren't in a real relationship. So why are you so jealous?”

“I'm not”, he reaffirmed, making her chuckle.

“Prove it”, she crossed her arms and daringly arched her brows.

She made every molecule of his body agitated. Once, Lando thought it was anger, for all the times they fought without having a reason and all the days she behaved like a brat, making his blood boil under his skin. Now, after the crash and the moment they shared in that tiny driver’s room, he wasn’t so sure anymore. 

He was furious; absolutely livid, without knowing exactly what he wanted. Normally, Lando is a very decisive man. But when it came to Y/N, things were just a mess in his head. And right now, looking at her with her arched brows and folded arms, almost daring him to explode at her, he knew that there was only one thing he could do to end up with the fire that was consuming him.

The next second, Lando had his lips on Y/N, furiously attacking them in the neediest kiss of all time. She was taken by surprise and actually had to wait a few seconds to reciprocate anything. She had that look on her face, provoking him into the edge, waiting for a shout that would give her a single reason to hate him. Now he’s got her on the hook and there was no way to run. Actually, Y/N didn’t actually want to run anyway.

Lando had pressed her against the wall, a leg right between her thighs, keeping them apart and their bodies close. He had a hand around her neck, and another one on her hips, securing her against the wall. The pressure he put on her throat felt delicious. No one had ever held her like that before. Her panty was soaking wet not even two seconds later.

It only felt better when he moved his kisses down, trailing them to her neck. His lips sucked on her sweet spot, right under her ear, making her moan with the hot sensation over her skin. Also, if she wasn’t turned on at that point, feeling Lando’s hard on her thigh absolutely did the job. And if he was playing a game, she knew how to dance around it as well. Quickly, one of her hands was palming him over his trousers. He moved back to her mouth, kissing her as if his life depended on it, and biting her bottom lip when the pleasure got too much for him.

“Stop it”, he moaned against her lips, making her smile. “You can only touch me when I say you can touch me”.

“Bullshit”, she dared. “Look at you, Lando. You can’t get enough of my touches. I know you want them all”.

“Fucking…”, Lando removed his knee from between her legs and helped her kneel on the ground right in front of him. He leaned forward and softly landed his hand on her chin, making Y/N look up. She tried to put her best innocent look and he was absolutely done for her. “Open your mouth, baby”.

Y/N opened her mouth for just a little bit, and Lando slipped his thumb in so she could suck on it. Then after a while, he replaced it with his middle and index finger, going in deeper and making her almost gag on his hands. Tired of playing games, he kneeled as well, levelling their eyes, before letting his hand travel to the zip on her back.

“Come on, pretty girl. I want to see you”, he left a few soft kisses on her cheek and daringly opened the zip. “Can I take this off?”, she nodded, but Lando wasn’t satisfied. “I need to hear you say the words”.

“Yes, please”, she pleaded and soon her dress was on the floor, exposing her bare tits from the lack of bra and lacy black thong. Lando didn’t waste a second before dipping his head into her nipples, sucking, biting and playing with both of them. Y/N was a moaning mess in second, pulling his head closer to her body as she felt fantastic with just his lips on her nipples. “Lan, oh my God. Please, I wanna feel you”.

“You misbehaved”, he smirked, getting away from her tits to undo his belt. “I told you not to touch me and just wait. Now, if you wanna touch me, you better open up”.

He quickly lowered his trousers along with his underwear and his hard cock came hard, slapping on his stomach. Lando was sure he could die happily at the sight of Y/N’s eyes brightening and her mouth automatically opening wider for him. “Good girl”, he praised, taking her face by the chin and bringing his cock to her lips.

Y/N’s mouth felt so warm and amazing; Lando was losing it. He started trusting his hips into her face, making his dick go deeper in her throat and her gagging sending delicious vibrations up his body. He was surprised when one of her hands grabbed his balls and massaged them, sending him over the edge just quick enough. He had to pull away before coming on her throat. Y/N pouted in the absence of his cock, still being attached to it by a string of spit and pre-cum. Lando used one of his hands to wipe it off before kissing her again.

“Baby girl, I need to last longer, and you’re not helping at all”, he whispered on her lips once again, making Y/N giggle. What she wasn’t expecting, though, was a hand sneaking into her pussy, his middle finger gathering the juices pooling on her panty. She let an audible moan out, making him know how much she was enjoying that. “Do you want my fingers?”

“Yes”, she breathed out and Lando picked her from the floor, quickly taking her to bed, where they could get more comfortable. He slowly removed her underwear and tossed it around the room, the place getting filled with her glorious smell. 

“Spread your legs wider, love”, Lando commanded and she immediately responded. “Good, just like that”. Y/N was going feral with the praise, and he got it right away. “You have a praise kink, pretty girl? Oh, that’s so sweet”.

Now that he knew that, Lando was going to put that information to use. He went back to her mouth though, this time slowing down the pace of her kiss, but the intensity was just like before. As much as he wanted to jump right in and just fuck the shit out of her, he would do anything to make this last for as long as he could. “If I am to have her for only one night, I want it to be unforgettable”, he thought.

Y/N was drunk on his kisses; feeling her soaking wet core brushing on his bare thigh and his tongue furiously sliding against hers. She just wanted to feel him, so she guided his hand to her pussy and pleaded with her eyes. Being a good boy, Lando slipped a finger inside her and pumped it inside slowly, making her lose it, throwing her head back in pleasure.

“Yes, right there. Oh my… Lando”, her hands flew to his back, fingers digging on his skin. Y/N started to roll her hips against his hand and he smiled at her attempt to feel even better. “I need more, please. One more”.

“One more finger, baby?”, Lando immediately obeyed, loving the sweet moan that came out of her mouth right after. “Come on, tell me what you want”.

“Kiss me, Lan”, she pulled his head closer to hers and her lips met his midway. Lando could’ve died happily just like that. He was getting addicted to her kisses, specially now that they were wanted and asked for. They weren’t a stunt act. They were behind closed doors. She was doing it willingly. 

“Does that feel good?”, he asked between kisses and she nodded, feeling a knot tightening around her stomach.

“I’m gonna cum”, she grunted, making him start circling her clit with his thumb. “Shit, shit. I’m cumming”.

Her pussy clenched around his finger and now he was covered with her juices. Knowing it would make her go crazy, Lando brought his fingers up to his lips and licked them, moaning at the taste of her sweetness. “God, makes me want to get it straight from the source. You taste so good, baby girl”.

Y/N sat on bed and jumped right into his neck, wrapping her arms around his head to kiss him intensely. Lando was surprised by that, but he couldn’t get enough of her kisses. He has been learning to love them for a long time now, but it was so different; so magical. 

“You want to eat me out, uhm?”, she asked him, making Lando arch his eyebrow and smile. “I asked you a question”.

“Well, I would not be opposed to it”.

“That’s not an answer, Lando”, she stopped kissing him, throwing her back against the mattress and getting comfortable between the pillows. She was not going to make him say it. He was the dominant; he wasn’t the one to say those kinds of things. But when Y/N spread her legs and started to play with herself, he just couldn’t keep it to himself.

“Fuck yes, I do. I want to eat you out, pretty girl”, he fell down, head right between her thighs, and started to trail kisses up her legs, until his lips were wrapped around her clit. If Y/N was trying to contain herself, she just couldn’t do it with how good it felt to him eating her pussy so deliciously.

But with their history, she just couldn’t help but provoke him. “You can do better than this”, Y/N dared, as if she wasn’t a moaning mess a few seconds before. And Lando wasn’t one to turn down challenges.

He pulled both of her legs over his shoulder, securing his head on her pussy and making her more comfortable. This time, he started sucking on her clit while working two fingers inside of her. He was too busy to say anything, but Y/N had a whole fucking lot to say about his work.

“Fuck, baby, you’re doing so good. Shit, you just know how to find the right spot. Gonna make me cum again, uhm?”, she was almost screaming in pleasure. When Lando started brushing the right spot inside of her, she felt like she was going to explode. It was different than any other orgasm she ever had in her life. She cummed so hard on his mouth, screaming his name in response.

“That was the hottest thing I’ve ever seen”, Lando had a beautiful smile on his face, that was covered in her juices. “Shit, that was so perfect”.

“You did so good”, she let a hand up to his face, rubbing circles on his cheek with an adorable smile on her face. But then, her hand fell to his cock, pulling him closer to her as she jerked him. “But now it’s time for both of us to feel good”.

Lando kissed her once again, just because the kisses were an addiction by now. Her hands pumping him only made it all feel so much better. Just the thought of having her around his cock made it twitch.

“Eager much?” She smirked on his lips, but Lando didn’t reply. Instead, he pulled her legs to wrap around his torso and guided his cock to her entrance, head brushing her pussy and collecting all the wetness. Y/N moaned and whined just with the contact.

“Eager much?” He joked back before putting just the tip inside. She felt so tight around him, Lando had to take a second to put it all in, needing to push one of her legs over his shoulder, just to give him more access. “Holy fuck, you feel so good around me. Baby, so tight for me. Fuck yes”.

He had closed his eyes, but she gripped on his throat, making him look down again. “Let me see your eyes, Lan”, she asked. His ocean green blue-ish orbs met hers and he quickly wrapped one of his hands on her throat as well. 

“Say my name again”, it was his turn to ask, and she moaned with the request. “Say it”.

“Lando”, she whispered, his cock now moving delicately inside of her. 

“Louder”, he demanded, picking up the pace.

“Lando!”, she screamed, making him slammer down his cock inside her. “I want you to ruin me”.

“Your wish is my command”. Now it was a matter of honour, and Lando was going to give what she asked. So he found the best pace, keeping the movements firm, yet slow enough to not be too much.

“You’re so big, love”, she praised, brushing her hands on his cheek, making him look her in the eyes. Lando looked so pretty while trying to contain his moans to speak. “I can’t get enough of you. I’m so full”

“You take me so well, my love. Fuck me”, his movements were getting sloppier, and she could feel his cock already twitching inside of her. Y/N also noticed that he was holding back his force, trying not to overstep. 

“Don’t hold back, baby. You can use me”, she encouraged, and that was all Lando needed to hear before quickening the pace. And then, it was getting too hard for him to hold back. He wanted to last longer, but it all felt so good. Lucky enough, Y/N started to clench around him. “I’m gonna cum, Lan. Please!”

“Let’s cum together, pretty girl. Come on, we can do this”.

He glued his eyes with her, the hand on her throat not letting them break eye contact as the waves of pleasure crashed over their bodies. Y/N came first, but less than 5 seconds later, he pulled out to come on her stomach. She pumped him outside, getting him dry, while he retributed the favour with his fingers until they were both done.

Y/N had to wait a second to come back to her senses, but Lando promptly took a cloth from the bathroom and cleaned the mess he made over her. Then, too tired to function, he dropped his body over her and pressed a few kisses all over her face. It was like now that he had finally had her, he just wanted to curl up with her and forget about the whole world. And she was willing to let him do just that, because that was exactly what she wanted as well.

He fell asleep just a few seconds into their comfortable silence. Y/N continued to roll her fingers through his curls, lulling him into deep slumber, as she thought about what had just happened. It was still unbelievable in her head, but she kept replaying every moment, already missing his touch. And if her feelings for Lando were already confusing because of that night after his crash, this only made things worse. But having him sleeping on her arms, his digits digging on her skin as he clings tight onto her, made her forget about all her worries.

He woke up for just a few seconds and caught her staring at him. Instead of pretending she wasn’t looking, Y/N cracked him a smile. Lando opened an even wider smile before pressing a kiss to her shoulder. “Let’s go to sleep, angel. Come on”, he got off her to turn off the lamp on the night stand, turning the room dark.

He found a spot for his head on a pillow and missed the warmth of Y/N. So he pulled her closer until she was lying on top of him. The skin to skin contact felt so intimate and comfortable for them. No fabric or cloth between them, just their bodies holding in together. And with his soft hands on her hair, Y/N fell asleep listening to Lando’s heartbeat, who had his own funny pace: quick in adoration for her, and then slow, after she calmed him down.

She would be the death of him someday.

⋘ 𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐯𝐢𝐨𝐮𝐬 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 // 𝐧𝐞𝐱𝐭 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐩𝐭𝐞𝐫 ⋙

⤳ 𝐚𝐝𝐝 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐬𝐞𝐥𝐟 𝐭𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭

𝐋𝐀𝐍𝐃𝐎 𝐍𝐎𝐑𝐑𝐈𝐒 𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓 - @celestialams @lizaschronicles @kapsylia @igotnorrrizz @hiireadstufff @bishhhitsaurionn @mrsmaybank13 @bborra @sltwins@riccdannyf1 @kapsylia @67-angelofthelordme-67 @ctrlyomomma @lan4cha16 @alltoomaples @ellen3101 @hellyesjaehyun @tastebaldwin @sweate-r-weathe-r @carmenita122 @m0cha-bunny @lqvesoph @itscrzy @fangirlvibez @poppyflower-22 @livelovesports @logischeroktopus @happy-jj @saturnbloom77 @cmleitora @formulaal @secretgal66 @taisferrari-blog @ellen3101 @sunsshinesunny @eclipsedcherry @tems13 @readingbringsjoy @naanibubbletimmispeach @kenzeyeballs @alilcloudy @architect-2015 @tillyt04 @eringaitskill @honeyhatty12 @dreamercrowd @demig0d0fapollo @mxmtewnz @whatamidoingwithmylife-ramdom @beyond-the-ashes @ijustgomessitupx @floraav @laiba26mindflay3r @books0fever @marialovesf1 @sltwins @ourteenagetragedy @katieschry1 @loveofmylife12 @diaa-20 @urfavsgf @chilisandmilk @elleeeee21 @likedbygaslyy

crossed means i can't tag you! dm me and maybe we can get it fixed

[joelscruff]

safety (boyfriend's dad!joel x f!reader)

just a bit of an origin story for my boyfriend's dad!joel relationship. you can read other installments of this fic here. this one isn't smutty but i hope you enjoy 💕 and here's my kofi if you'd like to leave a tip. summary: you find yourself falling for your boyfriend's father. rating: 18+ (mdni) warnings: age difference, cheating, daddy issues, daddy kink, lap sitting, pet names (use of babygirl) word count: 2.2k

the first time your boyfriend's father kisses you, it's because you ask him to.

you've always looked at him a bit differently, always found yourself taking quick peeks out of the corner of your eye whenever he's in the room, given him shy smiles and giggled at all his jokes (most of which were actually funny, believe it or not). the first time you'd met him you'd gone to shake his hand, expecting a firm shake and a quick nod like your own father, but he'd surprised you completely when he'd wrapped you up in his arms, given you a bear hug and softly told you he was so happy to meet you.

your boyfriend always rolls his eyes at his father's affection, his jokes, his quirks. it's been almost disappointing in a way, to see the way his father behaves in comparison to his son. your boyfriend constantly seems to cultivate a cold exterior - and interior, if you're being honest with yourself - while his father radiates warmth and welcomeness, a safeness you've never seen in your own father. you wonder how your boyfriend is able to take such advantage of his father's kindness, that safety that so many people can only crave and never experience.

the two of you fight a lot, but this is normal for you. every relationship you've had - whether familial or romantic - has involved some form of conflict. it's just the way things are; you've come to accept that. the only difference is that before this you never had a third party standing on the outside, witnessing it, worrying about it.

"are you okay?"

the first time he catches you crying you feel embarrassed; until this point you've put on a good front, been your sweet and passive self around him. now he sees a different side of you, the side everyone else in your life has seen dozens of times. the side that hurts, feels pain, suffers.

you nod, leaning against the banister of the front patio and biting your lip, "yeah, i'm fine," your voice cracks and breaks - you're not fine, your boyfriend just berated you for messing up his concentration during one of his stupid games, called you a waste of space. but you're not going to tell his father that.

"you don't look fine," he murmurs, taking a step toward you, "something happen?"

you shake your head, "no really, i'm okay, mr. miller."

"joel," he corrects you softly with a gentle smile, and you try to smile back.

"joel," you repeat, "sorry."

"don't be sorry," he says tenderly, taking another step toward you and carefully placing a hand on your shoulder, "i want you to know...if you ever need to talk to somebody, i'm here. i'll always listen, alright?"

you're not sure what to say; no one has ever given you an offer like that before. it's confusing and surreal. your brow furrows but you slowly nod, "okay."

he gives your shoulder a gentle squeeze and then goes back inside the house, leaving you standing there alone. the ghost of his touch weighs heavily for the rest of the evening, his words echoing in your mind. he can't really mean that, can he?

the next time he sees you cry it's only about a week after the first time, and this time he knows what's wrong. you can see it in his expression, the quiet anger burning behind his glasses for his own son.

"i won't defend him," he tells you softly, sitting next to you on the couch in the living room while your boyfriend yells something incoherent down the hall, "you can talk to me."

you find yourself confiding in him briefly, only briefly. you don't go into much detail, just tell him you hate being made to feel worthless, that it's something you've dealt with for a long time. he touches your shoulder again, squeezes it calmingly, reassuringly. you look into his eyes and feel yourself falling before you can even register it. he cares about you.

you think about him a lot. during the day, nights, when you're in bed and can't sleep and just want somebody to hold you. you imagine his arms wrapped around you, remember that first time you met when he'd hugged you so tight and welcomed you so warmly. you want him to hold you like that again, touch you, love you. you touch yourself and pretend it's his fingers, you bury your face in your pillow as you come and pretend it's his chest.

you think of him when you have sex with your boyfriend. you'd feel bad, but you've started to become numb with the way he treats you, uses you. you close your eyes and curl your hand in his hair and pretend it's his father on top of you, his father inside you, his father kissing your neck.

every week your boyfriend competes in ridiculously boring online competitions; you show up at his house only for the promise of seeing joel, talking to him, sharing a quick moment in the kitchen or living room with him. you sit on your boyfriend's bed and watch from afar as he bangs on the keyboard and shouts aggressive things into his microphone, sounding like a whiny and petulant child. you wonder what you even see in him anymore, what you even saw in him to begin with. you should end it, you know you should. but then how would you see his dad?

he berates you again for messing up his concentration, tells you to leave for a bit and to "stop being so annoying". you don't even protest, just climb off his bed and leave the room, slamming the door louder than necessary behind you.

joel spends a lot of time in his office; he's the head of a contracting company, always making plans, doing paperwork, making phone calls. he has his shit together, another thing you feel drawn to. he's the only person in your life who seems to know exactly what to do in any given situation, knows who he is and where he's going.

you find yourself climbing the stairs and knocking softly on his office door. "come in," he calls from inside, and you slowly push it open.

he looks up from his desk, scattered with paper and blueprints. his brow furrows when he sees it's you, "hey, sweetheart, you alright?"

you close the door behind you and then stand there for a few seconds just staring at him; he's got on a cozy looking grey sweater, knitted and warm. his jeans are dark and his socks are mismatched, a quirk you love. he looks perfectly disheveled in his joel miller sort of way, hair thick and curly, beard scruffy and soft. his glasses accentuate the kindness of his eyes, the tenderness as he looks at you. he's like a comforting beam of light, a safe haven.

"can you hold me?" you ask softly, barely a whisper. it's out before you even know you're saying it, and then you're biting down hard on your lip and feeling tears prick in your eyes.

he seems surprised but only for a moment, then he makes his way toward you in two long strides and wraps his arms around you, pulling you in and holding you close. you melt into his embrace, burying your head in his warm sweater and almost collapsing into his arms, feeling yourself begin to cry steadily. you should feel embarrassed but you're too overwhelmed by the feeling of finally being held by him again, feeling him so close, inhaling the comforting scent of him.

you feel him press a soft kiss to the top of your head, a gesture of comfort and safety, nothing more, "you're okay," he murmurs into your hair, "i've got you."

he holds you like that for a long time and makes no move to let go, just lets you stand there and take what you desperately need from him. your cries die down eventually until you're sniffling lightly into the thick fabric of his sweater and just breathing him in. his hands trail up and down your back comfortingly, tracing patterns and words, almost like a secret language.

"i feel safe with you," you mumble against his chest, but the words are muffled and hard to make out.

"hm?"

you pull back a bit to peer up at him with tear-filled eyes, cheeks pink and puffy, "i feel safe with you," you repeat, voice shaky but much more relaxed, calm.

he smiles softly, peering down at you with that familiar tenderness, "i'm glad," he murmurs, and you swear you catch his eyes trail down to your lips for a brief moment, "i want you to feel safe with me."

"can you kiss me?" you whisper, voice breaking on the last word, not caring that this could make or break the quiet companionship you've formed with him, "please."

his brow furrows again but he doesn't pull away, lips parting a bit in surprise, "sweetheart, i'm not sure that's-"

"please," you repeat, voice raw and desperate, "it's all i think about."

his expression relaxes then, the tenderness returning. with a resigned look you watch as he leans his face down toward you; you close your eyes and allow him to press his lips gently against yours, soft and sweet. he's so gentle, so warm, so safe. your arms wrap tighter around him as you kiss him back, a soft whimper falling from the back of your throat. it's perfect. he's perfect.

when he pulls away he leaves his forehead pressed against yours, and when you open your eyes your heart stutters when you see his face so close, lips wet from your saliva and eyes dark with desire.

"that what you needed?" he murmurs softly, nose brushing against yours.

you nod and kiss him again, humming quietly against him when he pulls you in closer and palms your back firmly, holding you close. you're not sure how it happens but you both end up on the small couch in the corner of his office, him sitting back against the cushions while you seat yourself in his lap, a leg on either side of his thighs. his hands travel inside your shirt, exploring the soft expanse of your back as you whimper again into his mouth and revel in the feeling of being touched by someone so different.

"what else do you need?" he breathes, voice deep and husky as his hands travel from your back to your face, cradling it in his palms, "i'll give it to you, sweetheart, anything you ask. just tell me."

you could say a multitude of things; you could tell him to kiss you again, touch you, fuck you, the list goes on. and you want him to do all of that, but the one thing on your mind is what inevitably slips past your lips.

"i just want you to hold me," you whisper, and you don't care if you sound pathetic, "please."

he looks at you with a great deal of pain in his eyes, an empathetic gaze you've seen numerous times. he thumbs your cheeks, wipes away the tears there and slowly nods.

"okay, babygirl," he murmurs, "i'll hold you."

you sit in his lap for the next hour. it's quiet and peaceful and perfect; he rubs your back while you bury your face into the crook of his neck, breathing him in and letting his presence completely invade your senses. you fall asleep briefly, but when you wake up you're happy to find that you're still in his lap, still being held. he makes absolutely no moves to remove you from him, to pull away or leave the room. he just holds you.

"thank you," you whisper finally; it's time to leave, you know this. your boyfriend will be looking for you soon, wondering where you went and why you didn't come back. you pull your face up from joel's neck and look down at him with tenderness, love.

"any time," he murmurs with a gentle smile, then leans forward a bit to press a tiny kiss to the tip of your nose, "i mean it, sweetheart. any time you're upset, any time you need to be held...you come to me, okay?"

you nod, biting down on your lip to keep the tears at bay, "no one's ever held me like this before," you whisper, "not even my own father."

his brows scrunch together and he touches your arms, squeezing them carefully in his hands, "i'm sorry, babygirl," he breathes, "you don't deserve that," his eyes capture yours in an intimate gaze, "you deserve the world."

the word is there, fighting to be spoken behind your lips. but you don't say it. you don't want to make him uncomfortable, don't want to ruin something that's only just started. but you feel it there, the desire to call him what you've been wanting to call him since the day you met. but that's a conversation for another day.

instead of words, you settle for a kiss. you lean down and touch your mouth to his, feel the gentle scratch of his scruff against your chin as you open a bit wider to allow his tongue to prod inside, just for a moment. he tastes like comfort, feels like safety.

daddy.

[ineffably-human]

We're going to scream about Nandermo all week, but right now I need to talk about Baron Afanas. Because the Baron's arc, so to speak, always felt like a big part of the series DNA for me - and oh fuck did this episode deliver on why.

I think we can agree: in the show, vampire society is fucked up, right?

Vampires on their own have plenty to deal with that can make them crazy. They have to live by killing. They lose everyone from their old lives. They have to find new reasons to keep going on, forever, so shit can get decadent really fast.

But holy shit, what that's turned into in vampire society? Where you actively put cruelty over mercy, and violence over solving your problems? Death cults and scam artists roam free, but if someone has depression the best thing to do is ignore them. Someone can get their mind wiped or be locked up for centuries, and that's just what you do to your species.

--

So: the Baron's arrival is the first conflict of the whole show. The joke is about an ancient powerful creature of pants-shitting terror, vs three lesser vampires who just want to live their lives and not get murdered for being too lazy to conquer humanity. There's a lot of talk about how to please him: do you keep to the old ways, or pick up some new traditions? Decorate with flayed skin, or with glitter? And the Baron says: who cares, you're all soft and useless. All that matters is getting more control over this world, until people are cattle and we have no reason to hide anymore.

But later he confesses: that shit stopped mattering ages ago. He's not even real nobility, he's literally impotent, and he talks about doing horrible things because he doesn't know what else to say. He's angry and half-crazy from boredom. And admitting that, owning those feelings, means suddenly he has three new friends and a whole new world of things to enjoy.

There's the Baron the rest of the vampire world knows, but for one night we see the ancient, unknowable terror was just a guy. Maybe he's always been just some guy.

That fun puts him in a vulnerable position, and he's killed by the most unwitting vampire slayer in fiction. But Baron Afanas is changed. He sucks dirt for a year and still comes out of it with a new lightness and joy to him. He saves the Sire, another ancient terrifying monster everyone was eager to kill or send away. They adopt the hellhound. They get cozy and give advice. They make popsicle stick houses and go on walks. They live.

And that seemed like the end of the story until last night - when the Baron suddenly felt like the butt of a joke everyone knew but him. Spurred on by someone else who feels lonely and ignored, the Baron felt vulnerable. And he snapped back to how he lived for centuries.

'What the hell are you all doing, enjoying yourselves? We're supposed to be unhappy. We're supposed to live centuries of unhappiness, bringing pain to everyone in our path, and we're definitely not supposed to cheer up our friend who's sad.'

--

Nobody liked the Baron before Guillermo killed him, not even other powerful vampires we meet; they saw the Baron as a crazy far beyond their own crazy. But this is also how vampire society values you. It's how they measure Nandor's worth when they think he's dead, too: how old and powerful you are, how much you've been able to conquer and kill.

Vampire pods are both cliquish and aren't expected to last in the first place. If someone dies, you literally paint them out of your lives and forget. Everything we see discourages feelings, sincerity, or even basic companionship. The only way to earn respect is to be cruel. The more cruel you are, the more powerful you are. The more powerful you are, the more feared you are - the lonelier you are, the crazier you are. It's practically designed to create the Baron, or worse.

But new vampires don't behave that way. And the vampires we follow in the show don't behave that way - because they have each other, because they've been encouraged to have each other, often by Guillermo. (Holy shit, Nadja saying maybe she'd be fine dying, and Nandor immediately asking if she's okay? Nothing changes in this house, except everything does. They're not going to almost lose one of their own ever again.)

The vampires in the heart of vampire culture never seem happy to be like this. It doesn't have to be like this.

--

The Baron doesn't become a tyrannical monster for long. Because he never actually was one - and because he spends two evenings and a fireball to the face, watching Nandor and Nadja fight for Guillermo. Watching them plead and cling and defy, seeing Guillermo's earnest feelings in spite of his bloodline and the mistakes he's made. Seeing Nandor's perfect trust, and then his grief, the way he insists that Guillermo was never 'just' anything. The Baron can't find real fulfillment in hurting someone (because that ship sailed ages ago). He can't deride them for caring, because he's cared for a long time now.

And when the Baron admits that's who he is, when he says it out loud, he only gains more in his life. He finds new depth in the happiness he'd felt for a while now, because he's admitted and allowed himself to be happy. And now he has the children he's always wanted. Living together, the Baron and the Sire are still ancient and powerful - and they're also family, finding real joy together in a world that was ready to dispose of them.

"I suppose with the right company, it can be beautiful, this eternal existence."

--

There's an inherent selfishness to being a vampire, taking from someone else in order to live. But there doesn't have to be inherent cruelty, or lack of love.

They're all ready to admit they care. The Staten vampires have all cared for Guillermo or each other in their own ways this season. And Guillermo doesn't lack for flaws, but loving his monster family has never been one of them. (When he and Nandor work their shit out, they're gonna be insufferable.)

Now they just have to let the Guide in. Because she's absolutely starved for love, and vampires get pretty fucked up when they're on their own.

[appleblueberry-pie]

Thank you for answering my sick reader request. Can I please ask for a part 2 wherein Yandere Nanami nurses his sick darling back to health and by the end of their sickness they at least trust them enough to sleep and cuddle beside them

I don't really like doing part 2s because I love seeing ppl suffer from cliffhangers, but I'll do it this one time.

And Let Yourself Heal

You don't find anything to say as Kento continues to be patient with you. This morning, he was up before you to cook you a warm breakfast. When you opened your already exhausted eyes, he was standing at your bedside with a wide tray of warm breakfast. He gently fed you every single mouthful, making sure you slowly chewed each bite, and even let you have a glass of strawberry lemonade since you insisted on one.

He tucked you under the sheets once more when you felt the urge to go back to sleep. And he was there when you woke up again midday to help bring you to the bathroom to clean yourself up. For once, he was actually respectful of your space and let you do what you needed without him hovering over you this time. He said he didn't want you stressed over nothing and how it's bad for a healing body to be pushed to its limits.

When you finished with your bathroom routine and got into freshly washed clothes, he had your favorite tv show on and had you sit on the couch with a cup of unsweetened tea to help your hunger before he finished with lunch. All of this for you. It almost seemed like he was overdoing it for you, but when you looked into his eyes, you could tell he meant every gesture from the heart. His sleeves have been rolled up since the morning and he doesn't plan to relax until the sun goes down and it's time for you to go to bed once more.

Your mind was clouded with judgement with how Kento was treating you, and couldn't focus on the show. Instead, you watched him chop the fruits and vegetables on the cutting board. He seemed to try and perfect every cut he made for the fruit so you can enjoy it to the fullest without any problems when eating it. And the vegetables were minced nicely before they went into the heated skillet. The aroma floating through the kitchen into the living room settled your heart in ways you didn't feel was possible.

Kento turned his head to check on you before double taking when he sees you already staring at him. A nervous smile spreads on his face as he brings you the chopped fruit. "You pestered me about getting these the last time I went grocery shopping, so I decided to get them for you this time. Take your time with these, please." He gently informs you, placing the bowl of fruit on the table in front of you before leaving back into the kitchen.

You felt conflicted by the time dinner started. You were sure Kento hasn't eaten all day and has been putting all of his time and energy into taking care of you. You really shouldn't feel like this, but you were worried. Worried he was taking it too far for you and for himself. You watch him carefully organize a bite on the plate onto the eating utensil with a small smile on his face before showing it to you for you to eat. You hesitate at first, but still take the bite, slowly chewing. "Are you alright? Is it not to your liking? More salt?" You shake your head and let him wipe the corner of your mouth with a napkin.

"Then what is it?" He mutters and gives you your cup of water. You hesitate to tell him, but then settle for telling him the half truth. "Maybe a little more garlic next time." He nods in appreciation and gathers another bite for you. When you blink, it's bedtime. For some reason, he always seemed to know when you naturally get drowsy at night, and makes that your scheduled bedtime. He's currently folding the covers underneath your chin for you to be the most comfortable when you sleep. His steady hands carefully take in every detail of the sheets to make sure you're alright.

You turn your back to him, closing your eyes to finally rest. When he finishes, he sits back up and rests is hands on his lap with a content sigh. You were way more compliant than any other time he's tried to take care of you. Maybe you were finally turning over a new stone, allowing him to show you the love you deserve and need. He stares at you from a distance, the distance he's always wanted to close. And without thinking, his hand raises back up on its own and gently rubs at your back. But you don't do anything. You didn't seem to tense up at all when he did this and Kento felt his heart leap with excitement.

Without trying to bother you, he decides to try and push it further. He waits a few moments and stops touching you before scooting closer to you. Nothing. With gentle movements, he lays down on the same side you're laying on and stares at your backside. And if he stares long enough, he'll realize that this is exactly how it looks in his dreams to lay in bed with you. This is genuinely all he's ever wanted. He refuses to ruin this moment by touching your waist or arms. He'll wait until you allow him to move closer to you. Allow him to touch your face, your sides when you're awake. And maybe then, he will have your consent to make the relationship bloom into something even more.

[mncxbe]

#Drafts

𝑨𝒌𝒊 𝒙 𝒇𝒆𝒎!𝒅𝒆𝒗𝒊𝒍 𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒅𝒆𝒓

ღೀ๋࣭ ⭑𝒄𝒘: reader feeds on Aki's blood, dry humping, sub Aki// just a little something I wrote cuz the idea of csm men x devil!reader is so yummy

ღೀ๋࣭ ⭑ ღೀ๋࣭ ⭑ ღೀ๋࣭ ⭑

The wooden floor creaked lightly as you tip-toed closer to Aki's bed, alerting him to your presence. "You came again" sighed Aki, looking over his shoulder to find you scooched down on the empty space left on the mattress. His eyes momentarily slid to the clock on the nightstand– 02:14. You really weren't wasting any time.

"Don't act surprised. It's pay day after all" you retorted in that sickly sweet voice of yours, causing the man to roll his eyes in annoyance. "I meant that I'm surprised you caught me at such a convenient time."

It was true, you always seemed to pick the most inopportune moments to feed on him– when he was at the bar with his colleagues or during missions, forcing him to abandon whatever he was doing and find a secluded alley or an empty bathroom stall so you could do your thing in peace. But that was part of your contract and there was nothing Aki could do about it: on the first day of the month you could feed on his blood whenever and wherever you pleased. Considering how powerful your abilities were, at first Aki thought it'd be a small price to pay for the contract, but now he was starting to regret this deal.

He was used to being around devils and fiends, but none of them have ever gotten this close and it was making him feel uncomfortable, strange and most of all– ashamed. Ashamed of how impatient he grows towards the end of each month, ashamed of how excited he is to see you every time, to feel your warm mouth on his skin, ashamed of just how much he enjoys the rush of having you feed on him and how utterly helpless he feels in those moments– like a fly in a spider's trap. He's always sworn he hated devils, so why were you so different? Why did you, a creature of sin and violence, occupy his mind like this– consuming his thoughts every day and night. Was he really that weak? Was he no different from the devils he hunted down, who couldn't control their own bodies and minds? Was it going to get better, would he get used to you or was he doomed to lived in conflict for the rest of his life, in a neverending loop of shame and guilt?

As if reading his thoughts you inched closer to him, your lips curling into a wicked smile. "What's the matter, Aki? Something bothering you?"

"N-no just... Power and Denji are in the next room. Can we just get this over with?" he sighed, hooking a finger under the collar of his t-shirt and tugging it lower, making some space for you.

The room seemed to shrink as you moved closer to him, shifting your legs on each side of his hips. Like a cat taunting its prey you ghosted your lips over the sensitive skin on his neck, making him shudder. "I don't like to be rushed, Aki. You should know by now that I like to enjoy my meals." you spoke in that velvety voice of yours and Aki's eyes fluttered shut. He was unconsciously gripping the sheets below him, his knuckles turning white from the strain– it was the waiting that sucked all the energy out of him, the knowing that soon enough your sharp canines would graze his skin, drawing blood and you'd press your palm on his chest to keep him from squirming.

Slowly but surely, your mouth moved to the nape of his neck and you bit down on his flesh, causing Aki to gasp. His back slightly arched off the mattress and you pressed yourself flush against his chest, keeping him grounded onto bed as you sucked on the little cuts. You swiped your tongue along the ridges of the wound, heat spreading through Aki's body and his toes curled, his chest heaving. The steady loss of blood combined with pent up frustrations and your closeness was enough to make his head spin and strangely enough, he felt so much more present. He was aware of your plush lips and warm tongue on his skin, of the weight of your body on his and the cushy mattress below, dipping down under the two of you. Aki felt like he was sinking. When you bit him again, only a few inches away from the initial wound his whole body jerked up, his thigh jamming between your legs, ripping a moan from you. "Sorry..." he sighed, gripping onto your hips to steady himself but you only bit down harsher. "Ah fuck–"

His head was spinning, mouth watering at the sensation. His dick was growing stiff in the confinement of his slacks and, as if sensing his need, you changed positions, resting your thigh between his legs. Despite his better judgement, Aki thrusted his hips, grinding his clothed erection on your thigh as he panted slowly.

"Enjoying yourself?" you taunted, removing your mouth from his wound and placing a few chaste kisses along his nape. Aki only nodded, his brows furrowing, mouth falling into a small o as he grabbed the back of your thigh, keeping you steady while he slowly rocked his hips. "Y-yea. Feels nice keep going"– his voice laced with urgency and you ran your tongue along his fresh wounds again. Aki felt his self restraint slipping away with each moment that passed– his body reacting to yours on its own. God, he was hopeless, weak and needy, so desperate for something more. Would you give him more if he asked? Would you indulge him, let him use your hand or maybe your mouth to please himself? Or maybe you'd do it yourself... Still, he couldn't and shouldn't, not even once because he knew he wouldn't be able to stop if he actually got what he wanted. So this would have to do.

Aki was too lost in his own thoughts to notice that you'd stopped biting him and returned to leaving wet, open mouth kisses on his neck. Yea... he knew you were enjoying seeing him like this– he could feel you smiling and giggling against his skin, impatiently shifting your hips as you tried to provide him with more friction. Tell me what you want me to do. What could he even say to that? No, he wouldn't allow himself to stoop so low as to let a devil touch him like that, no matter how much he wanted it. "Just keep doing that" he babbled out, bucking his hips into your thigh as he threw his head back in pleasure. If Denji or Power were to walk in the room they'd probably be mortified– the whole display was sinful, straight out of a romantic's painting– your mouth latched onto his throat, your back curved into a perfect arch, your bodies pressed together among blood-splattered sheets. And yet, he loved every second of it.

His breath grew shallow as he felt the coil in his abdomen tighten, ready to snap and he shuddered, his lips lightly parting. The moment your lips fell on his he came undone, riding out his high as he came in his pants. He gave into the kiss, allowing you to dip your tongue into his mouth. The sharp taste of iron filled his mouth– his blood, he was tasting his own blood from your mouth but couldn't care less. He only parted away from you when he grew breathless and his whole body melted into the mattress. The reality of the events that just took place sunk heavy in his mind– he just came in his pants while you fed on him. The familiar guilt settled into his being and he sighed heavily, trying to ignore the wet spot on his crotch. "You're done, right?" he asked in his usual stern voice. At least he had the ability to mask his nervousness.

"I think I should be asking you that" you chuckled, looking down at his body and he scoffed. You knew he was getting irritated by your presence and decided to call it a night– Aki wasn't like other men, he wasn't going to just give in. You knew you had to take it step by step, to ease him into becoming fully yours– mind, body and soul. But you'd get there in time. Pressing a quick kiss to his cuts you finally rolled off of him. "You should get that patched up. Wouldn't want you to bleed out so soon." Aki dismissed you with a quick nod, not even bothering to look at you as you disappeared into the shadows, leaving him alone in his bedroom. Despite his composed demeanor Aki's mind was still racing. He remained motionless, staring at the floor and counting the tiny cracks in the linoleum, counting the days until he'd see you again. He knew this was just the beginning, knew that with each meeting he'd need more and you'd give him more. You'd feed him little crumbs until he had the whole buffet and nothing would be enough to satisfy him– and worst thing is he was going to let you do that and enjoy every second of it.

[definitelysel]

A PREPOSTEROUS PREDICAMENT

pairing : neuvillette x fem!reader

summary: a baker gets framed for a crime she didn't commit. neuvilette comes to her aid as they embark on a crime solving journey full of banter, mysteries and connections.

contains : mention of poisoning, murder and death, usage of she/her pronouns, hurt/comfort if you squint, playful banter, a bit crack energy, neuvillette is such a softie, mentions of voicelines from neuvillette's chatacter quest (no major spoliers), more of a story than a romance based but it has its fluff moments, slight ooc, alot of dividers (sorry), may be incorrect in terms of court proceedings and laws overall because I am not a law student :')

a/n: this was based on @sxttoruu 's idea. thank you for inspiring me to write something. This isn't as romantic because I want to keep it realistic as people who are getting to know each other closely for the first time don't immediately fall in love. Enjoy!

p.s. italics are for flashbacks or events that have already taken place.

not proof read.

w/c: 4.5k words

I heard they were enemies turned lovers."

“Rotten to the core!”

“You are the murderer!”

Neuvilette has beheld this sight yet again. His deep hues gently rested their gaze on the commotion before him. Despite upholding his position as the Ludex of the Fontaine Court – it seemed nothing more than a theatre segment. 

Recently, cases were mundane and yawn-evoking. Lady Furina had attained severe apathy towards all conflicts. 

However, one thing which had created the slightest amusement in his life was one bakery and perhaps the best bakery in the Court of Fontaine region. The owner was a kind soul with the brightest smile and the sweetest loaves of bread in her arsenal. That baker was Y/N.

Though Neuvillette never exchanged words with her, that smile was enough to brighten his day. The bakery was always bustling with not a single moment of solitude. Many asked the secret behind these one-of-a-kind baked goods, to which she would always reply with “Love.”

Yet things spiralled into turmoil on one faithful day.

It was the 50th anniversary of Fontaine’s most prosperous business company. Mr Cornielle was a reputed man with expertise in his niche. He had commissioned the baker as his caterer for the occasion, to which the baker complied.

The party was a grand set-up. Fontaine’s most influential people had been invited as the guests but would be deemed incomplete without the Ludex and the Archon herself.

The blissful environment with bubbling refreshments was a sight to behold. Neuvilette acquainted himself with few folks, yet his eyes drifted across the room, searching for something or perhaps someone.

Was it the baker he sought? He didn’t know himself. Neuvillette constantly had his head boggled with numerous unanswered questions that he kept to himself. Yet it was unequivocal that the baker piqued his interest. Neuvillette just couldn’t pinpoint the reason.

The laughter that surged through the hallways turned into chaos and screams of distress as the host. Mr Cornielle crashed to the floor, mid-conversation, seemingly foaming at his mouth. 

“Everyone, please remain quiet and step away from the victim,” Neuvillette spoke up, creating distance between the guests and the fallen man. “Such gal! To commit such a heinous crime that to in my presence. The perpetrator must not fear anything.” Lady Furina marvelled at the audacity of the offender while taking in the situation up-front.

Neuvillette brushed over her antics and turned to face the person conversing with the victim before the incident, his eyes searching for answers.

“He was talking about the company and its achievements while sipping on the wine before…this.” The person in question stammered out, shaken from the whole ordeal. 

“Anything else?” 

“Well, he was taste-testing the delicacies before the wine.”

Gasps erupted from the crowd as the heads turned towards the baker, who tended to the service trays. Y/N lifted her head, a sweet and proud smile dancing across her lips that soon disappeared after noticing all the eyes on her.

 “She did it! She killed Mr Cornielle.”

 “Arrest her!”

 “Lady Furina, do something!?”

“Seize her,” Furina spoke up, pointing at the baker, whose eyes had widened like saucers. “No, please! I didn’t do anything, I swear! Don’t take me away!” The baker's pleas received no sympathy as the guards dragged her away. She could hear the murmurs amongst the crowd.

“Such heinous act.”

“Wonder if all those years of goodwill were a mere facade?”

The baker’s head hung low from shame. “I have failed you, father.” she grieved and was taken away from the scene.

The stage lights flashed open, highlighting the accused. Trials in Fontaine are like drama, is a saying that lived up to its name. 

“Charges have been pressed against the baker regarding murder through poisoning. All shreds of evidence are in opposition to the condemned. Would the accused like to speak up for themselves?” Neuvillette’s voice bellowed throughout the hall as all eyes narrowed at the person in the middle.

“I didn’t do it, I swear!” the baker pleaded.

“Nonsense! Who else would dare poison such an influential man?”

“I would like everyone to maintain the decorum of the court.” Neuvillette commented. “As all evidence seems to line up against Ms Y/N. I hereby declare her guilty until further investigation on this matter. Guards to escort her to the Fortress of Meropide. The court is adjourned.”

The rainfall after that trial was full of doubt, leaving a gloomy aftermath.

“Oh! hydrodragon, hydrodragon. Please don’t cry.”

The Fortress of Meropide, in all its grandeur, was the last place the baker wanted to be in. She longed for the bright sun and brisk winds. The cold shackles clung to her hardworking palms as she sat behind bars. It was not long before footsteps echoed down the dark hallways. She could make out a faint outline of a familiar silhouette.

“Monsieur Neuvillette?” the baker croaked out. She could see the Ludex of Fontaine in all his glory right in front of her eyes. An aura of authority followed him. The baker found her words stuck in her throat.

“I want the truth.” He said, getting straight to the point.

“I didn’t do it. I made those dishes with my own two hands. I swear upon my father’s legacy that I lack the spine to commit such a felony.” The baker stated without a single falter. Neuvillette seemed pleased with the answer. He admired the baker’s willpower to stand up for herself. Humans were unpredictable.

“Answer this. If given a chance, would you do anything to prove your innocence?” He asked that question. Humans were peculiar in terms of communication. One word may sting them to their core, while the other may send them over the moon.

“You are going to grant that baker a monitored bail?” Furina asked, baffled.

“Yes. I hope you don’t object to my actions, Lady Furina.” Neuvillette nodded, reinforcing his previous statement.

“But why? All the attestations are against her?”

“...” Neuvillette remained silent before getting up and leaving.

“HEY! NEUVILLETTE! Where are you going!?” He could hear the last of her words before exiting the room.

You will see much in the human world, from the delightful to the depressing. One day, when you have dwelled amongst humanity long enough, you will bring judgment as a spokesperson for Fontaine’s past.

Those words made Neuvillette question his emotions. He was in a battle between his sense of justice and morality. Part of him couldn’t accept the baker as the culprit. There had to be something that was missing. Something purposefully hidden from the public.

“I will. Anything to prove my innocence.” the baker affirmed his question. Neuvillette had to suppress the smile threatening to show itself. “Very well. Then, I shall grant you a monitored bail during the next hearing.” He spoke, maintaining the formality in his tone before turning around to leave.

“If you don’t mind me asking, Monseiur, who will monitor me?”

“Ah yes, That would be me.”

"As per the law, a person without a lawyer has two choices. Either get a government-assigned lawyer to defend them or fight for their case themselves." The Court was crowded and bustling. It irked Neuvillette just a bit. To these people, trials were drama shows they could flock to. Neuvillette never liked trials being dramatic affairs in his time as the Chief Justice.

"How would the accused like to defend their stead?"

"I will fight my case myself." Y/N spoke up, slight uncertainty in her tone.

"Is that woman crazy?'

"No way. This case keeps getting interesting!"

The cacophony of mockery and laughter made her confidence plummet to the ground. It was hopeless. How could she possibly fight her case alone? She should go with the lawyer.

"Granted. You have two weeks to gather evidence to prove your innocence under a monitored bail. If you fail, life imprisonment for homicide will be your sentence.”

"You will be monitoring me, Monsieur?!"

"Yes. Any objections?" 

"No, just why?"

Neuvillette remained silent. He seemed to be threading his words carefully.

"....to find answers to certain questions. So far, morality is winning."

"Huh?" The baker tilted her in his cryptic response.

"Nothing. The hearing will begin at 8 a.m. sharp. Be punctual."

"The Court is adjourned."

Y/N stood in the now-empty courtroom before she spotted Neuvilette approach her. “Here, this should help you on this journey of fighting for your innocence.” He handed her the book and bid her farewell. Y/N brought the book closer to her face to analyse it better.

GUIDE TO CONDUCTING INVESTIGATIONS AS A NOVICE.

ANYONE CAN FOLLOW THIS QUICK AND EASY GUIDE!

Y/N blinked in utter confusion before chuckling at his antics. 

STAGE 1: FAMILIARIZING YOURSELF WITH THE PAST

Additional: Familiarize yourself with the Chief Justice.

The clock was now ticking.

The investigation had kicked off. Y/N found herself more immersed in her thoughts. She was digging out potential clues and links. Delving deep into Mr. Cornielle’s past gave her an insight into the whole matter. Who was he meeting? What were his plans? Which people did he get into a disagreement with often? All questions seemed to answer themselves one by one.

Y/N sat in her room, deep in thought. She was under house arrest as of now. Neuvillette would accompany her around when she was outside. When busy, she would just hang out in his office. Y/N had developed a sense of truth when it came to Neuvillette. He had certainly earned it with his actions. He was a man clouded with mystery.

Though, he did seem to have a strange liking towards melusines and magic shows. She found that endearing about him. Neuvillette was a man, gentle and poise, gracing every place he went to. Though he was a dork when it came to said things.

He would mutter curses each time his hair or robe got stuck in one of the chairs. He tended to be a food critic. He may be polite about it, but he wasn't the best at hiding that he disliked dry food. If the food wasn't wet, he didn't want it. Both of them had grown to appreciate the other’s company.

"If my memory serves me right, Mr Cornielle in a political rivalry with Mr Etienne? They both clash heads. Their history is notorious among the locals. He can be a potential suspect."

"I have worked for that Etienne fellow. Before I started my business as an independent baker, I used to work for him to earn my daily meals. I knew that man is never up to any good. I have heard him threaten to kill Mister Corneille on multiple occasions."

"That is a big lead. You can work on that and visit the crime scene to scope the evidence."

"Wait. Are you helping me, Monsieur?" she mused- a smirk creeping onto her face.

"No. I am mere brainstorming. All the brains applied here are yours. I am simply giving my input."

"Uh-huh..."

"The investigators found a discarded poison vial. It had moisture on its exterior. From the taste of the water, it must've been transported here from Sumeru to Fontaine's port."

"I see. That can be a big clue if we find the receipt- wait, did you say– from the taste of the water??"

"..."

"Monsieur Neuvillette, are you implying that you licked the bottle and figured out it came from Sumeru? More importantly, how do you even know the difference between the waters of different nations?!"

"I think Lady Furina is calling me. Farewell."

"You aren’t denying that you licked the bottle! HEY! COME BACK! I NEED ANSWERS!"

STAGE 2: GOING TO THE CRIME SCENE 

Additional: Getting jump scared and falling into a secret room only to get spooked again.

Y/N felt like she was an incarnation of Sherlock Holmes. She kept inspecting every surface for potential clues, scoping out corners in classic detective fashion. She couldn’t spot anything connected to the crime. That was until she entered the changing rooms. Something didn’t seem right to her. She didn’t put anything in the delicacies. It must’ve been one of the waiters who must’ve tinkered with the food.

The room was dimly lit and elegant. The lockers were neat and had mirrors on the end of the room. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary.

“You are supposed to inform me before wandering off by yourself. Might I remind you that you are still under monitored bail,” Neuvillette approached her from behind. Y/N, startled by his appearance, lost her footing and fell towards the mirror. To their shock, the mirror flipped open. She crashed into a dark, dusty room.

“Are you okay?” Neuvillette asked with worry before entering the room behind the mirror. It was hard to make out what was in there.

“I am okay.” She groaned before opening the flashlight. The room was empty. She walked a bit further, swaying the flashlight left-right to emit any corner hiding some clue. She spotted what seemed to be an identification sigil. 

“Monsieur, I found something.” 

“Hm? What is it?” Neuvillette approached her and inspected the sigil. “It is a Fatui sigil. One which operatives use.” She made a mental note of it and flashed her flashlight up ahead, only to meet a horrifying sight that made her shriek and cling to Neuvillette’s tall stature. He was startled as well. 

“What’s wrong?” 

“Up ahead! It’s a man tied up.”

The statement raised his guard as he took the flashlight and pointed it straight. It was a man tied up with ropes and a gag in his mouth. He seemed to be unconscious and only in his underwear. “I would like to propose a theory.” He started. “It would appear that the culprit caught his man and disguised themselves as a waiter to sneak into the party undetected.” 

“That can be a possibility. After all, I did suspect that one of the waiters messed with the food.”

“I will call the concerned authorities to get this man to a doctor. You can get off me now. I never knew you so easily frightened.” Neuvillette mused. He thought he had been amidst humans long enough to know about their behaviour. However, every time, a new antic would reveal itself.

“Scared? Me? Of course not! I was just making sure you weren’t scared!” She defensively retorted.

“By clinging on to me for dear life? How so?” Neuvillette mused at her.

“How about we save the man in bondage first?” She brushed over his question and changed the topic. Neuvillette chose not to pry further and left to call for assistance.

STAGE 3: ONE CLUE LEADS TO ANOTHER

Additional: Quality bonding time with the Ludex.

“I am not fighting a Fatui Operator. I am a baker! Do you expect me to fight someone with a baguette!?” Y/N gaped at him.

“If you fight with a baguette or any pastry for that matter, the Operator will first chuckle at your antics and then proceed to dispose of you,” Neuvillette stated the obvious and kept walking straight. Mont Esus East was a mountainous terrain. The walking made the baker’s leg feel like jellies.

“How much longer do we have to walk!” She whined and stopped walking. “A bit more. Don’t give up now. We can’t let this turn into a futile attempt.” Neuvillette ushered her to keep going. After traversing for what felt like an eternity, they spotted a small camp. 

“Okay. Monsieur, I am serious. How are we going to fight those tough guys.” Y/N patiently waited for him to explain his plan, but nothing came. “We go and engage in battle. It is a straightforward plan.” Neuvillette began approaching the camp. He didn’t strike her as someone who could fight off bad guys. She watched as Neuvillette made quick work of the Operators.

“Woah- you don’t come off as someone who can brawl!” Y/N marvelled, her eyes twinkling in admiration. 

“I don’t recall ever reading about a judge who can fight.” Neuvillette shrugged.

“You are right, Monsieur. The stereotype of all judges being oldies is quite common among people. No offence.”

“Offence taken.”

“What? HEY! We both know I was joking!” Y/N quickly replied. She didn’t want to anger him unintentionally.

“So was I.”

“Huh?”

“Nevermind,” Neuvillette sighed. It appeared to him that he had to work on his people skills. The baker brushed over the awkward atmosphere and examined the records inside the camp. There were all sorts of legal documents. Old, damp or torn, you name it.

“Gosh, so hard to make out what exactly is written on these.” The baker rummaged through the piles of paper only to find a slightly torn document. It was from a small-scale herbal pharmacy in Sumeru. The document talked about a poison capable of killing someone in under a minute. What stood out the most was the signature at the bottom of the recipient.

“This is it. That is no doubt Etienne’s signature.” Neuvillette spoke, seeing the document himself. 

“Let’s go. We must show this to everyone.” 

“Not so fast. Night has caved in. We should stay here and leave tomorrow at sunrise.” He quickly shunned her advances.

“But Monsieur!”

“No buts.” He remained firm on his decision. Had it been just him, he would’ve departed despite the darkness, but now, with a person by his side, he felt responsible for their safety and chose prevention instead.

Silence engulfed the camp before the baker spoke, “It's funny how quickly people change opinions. All this time, I have done nothing but feed people and bring smiles to their faces, yet I got accused of something I didn’t do. People can be so shallow.” Neuvillette’s gaze soften. He understood the feeling of becoming an outcast better than anyone. “I agree.”  

“Monsieur, why are you helping me?” 

“I apologise if it comes off as something I am doing for my gain, but I am doing this to help you. I can’t explain it, but some part of me kept telling me that there is more than what meets the eye and that I must delve deeper. As the Chief Justice, I can’t afford to be shallow and only go off based on what I see. There is always more to the truth than rumours and gossip.” Neuvillette voiced his reasoning. He could hear hiccups from the baker, an indication of tears.

His heart ached. This situation was Neuvillette’s flaw. He always seemed to get emotionally affected by the plight of people. “I am aware that I am not in a position to say this, but you are worth fighting for. Everyone is. Each individual deserves a chance.” He wasn’t the best when it came to comforting people. He could only try. 

“Y-you think so? I don’t know how I will rebound from this incident. My business will be in shambles. I won’t be able to fulfil my promise to my father.” she wiped her tears away. “I may not be the best at giving solutions, but if you trust my judgement, I’d like to quote, “When there is a will, there is a way.” That captures my advice for you.” Neuvillette mustered his best uplifting tone, a contrast to his usual authoritative one. 

“Thank you." The baker paused before continuing, "Oh! Look, it’s raining.” The baker pointed out. “Apologies, this is going to be an inconvenience tomorrow.” Neuvillette sighed. 

“Why are you sorry, Monsieur?” 

“No reason.”

The baker sighed. Neuvillette was a tough one to figure out.

“Hydro dragon, hydro dragon, don’t cry.” The baker muttered under her breath, which caught his attention. “You believe in that local legend as well? I don’t get why people think that the hydro dragon weeps. Perhaps he gets stirred by all the tears that fall on this land.” Neuvillette pondered about the legend in slight exasperation.

The baker chuckled at him. “Perhaps people think that the hydro dragon deserves comfort as well.” 

Monsoon had dawned upon Fontaine. 

"When is this rain going to stop?"

"My vacation plans are spoilt."

Neuvillette could hear them all. A solemn feeling engulfed him as the raindrops collided with the floor, creating pitter-patter Sorrows, grievances, questions, mysteries and conflicts, all get washed away with the flowing waters.

The human world was both delightful and depressing. Neuvillette had grown accustomed to his responsibilities, yet when the clear sunny skies shined above him, he was mindful of enjoying the warmth they brought, reminiscing the memories of his friends who wished him stress-free days. 

“Hydro dragon, hydro dragon, don’t cry.” he heard a young boy yell that phrase amidst the rain.

“Archenoul! Honey, come inside. You will get wet!” his mother called out.

“Coming! I was just comforting the hydro dragon!”

He couldn't stop his lips from curling up into a smile.

He had always questioned his existence. He tried to connect his past, answering questions that remained unanswered. Yet the sunny days and small moments like such burnt all those thoughts away with their radiance and brought light to his life.

“Comforting the hydro dragon? A silly idea. It is endearing.” Neuvillette spoke after breaking away from his thoughts.

“I know. Wonder who came up with it.” The baker chuckled. The rain slowly came to a halt as time progressed.

STAGE FOUR: FIGHTING THE CASE

“I would like to request Mr. Etienne to come up front.” The baker stood with confidence in front of all eyes.

“Very well. Why exactly do you require my presence?” Etienne stepped up. He was an equally influential businessman. His involvement only made this trial more interesting. “You are known to have a long history with Mr. Cornielle. Both of you were involved in a toxic rivalry.” 

“Are you implying that I killed him?” The man’s face showed hints of anger.

“I never said that.” The baker quickly replied and moved on. “There was a vial in one of the dustbins. It contained the poison that killed Mr.Cornielle. It originates from Sumeru.” 

“How can you prove that it is from Sumeru? That is unless you purchased that bottle yourself, Ms. Y/N.” The man turned the tables. It was now a game of volleyball. The only question that remained was, who’s court will the ball end up in by the end?

“You are right. I can’t prove the bottle’s origin, but this paper does.” The baker pulled out the torn sheets found earlier at the camp. “These are receipts of purchases. Multiple items were imported from Sumeru, including a vial. These documents happen to have your signature on them.”

“Let’s be real Mr.Etienne. Either you confess your crime, or I will narrate your ‘masterplan’ in front of everyone,” Y/N looked him dead in the eye. 

“Fine. I did kill that bastard with my own hands.” Gasps echoed in the hall. Lady Furina had an expression of shock on her face. “That stupid Cornielle. He always found a way to be an obstacle on my way to success. If he had kept his nose out of my business…”

Everyone could tell at that given moment that the man was a lunatic.

“I did sneak into the party that night. I disguised myself as a waiter and snuck the poison into his food. The Fatui were very helpful in the import of the goods without raising suspicions. Just as I had planned, all the blame was pinpointed at you, Ms.Y/N.” He started laughing sinisterly.

The atmosphere had turned eerie and cold. People could feel goosebumps on their arms. “My plan was perfect, but an anomaly snuck in.” The businessman gazed at Neuvillette, who sat in his chair, eyeing the entire scene.

There was a moment of brief silence.

“It seems that it is clear now. Mr Etienne killed Mr Cornielle out of sheer jealousy. He used his alliance with the Fatui to obtain the poison to kill him in cold blood. Then he skillfully made it appear as Ms Y/N’s fault who was sent to jail while Mr Etienne roamed free. Mr Etienne, you are declared guilty of homicide, framing the innocent, inflicting violence and importing illegal goods across national borders. You are sentenced to life imprisonment till your execution date.” Neuvillette stated and ordered the guards to take the businessman away.

“I know you were involved in this Ludex! I will make you pay!” the man screamed till taken away by the guards. Neuvillette sighed before continuing,

“I declare Ms Y/N not guilty and wish her a prosperous business from here on. The court is adjourned.” He finished as the Court slowly began to clear out. Y/N let out a breath of relief. It felt like a huge boulder was taken off her shoulders. She had proved herself innocent.

STAGE FIVE: CELEBRATE YOUR VICTORY

Additional: towards the future with a new special someone.

It had been a few months since that fateful incident. Everyone's tongues had the same question. How did the baker do it? Neither the baker nor the Ludex reveals it. The bakery’s business was booming more than ever. People came, enjoyed their meals and left. Life was back to normal. 

The evening sun was making its descent. The shop was now empty and Y/N was busy cleaning the counters.

“Is the shop still open?” a familiar voice made her ears perk up. “Monsieur Neuvillette!” The baker turned around to see the familiar blue and white robe and tall stature. “Greetings I hope you haven’t faced any unpleasantries up till now.” the man asked as the baker tackled him into a hug. It caught the Chief Justice off guard, yet a warm feeling spread across his chest. 

“Oh- sorry, I shouldn’t have done that.” the baker profusely apologized.

“I believe it is fine. We have spent time together long enough to be well acquainted.” Neuvillette waved his hand dismissively.

“Come! Sit down! I will get you something.” The baker offered, but Neuvillette shook his head and politely declined.

“Maybe next time. I was just passing by so, I thought I would pay a quick visit. My schedule is full till next month but I will be sure to come whenever time permits.”

“You better come! I will serve you all of my bestsellers!” the baker shot him a toothy grin.

“Is this perhaps a way for you to mug me off my money?” Neuvillette raised a brow at her. Will she get his attempt at humour this time?

“Mug you? No! It is called a business strategy.” The baker proudly chimed with her hands on her hips. She did take his joke this time.

Neuvillette was enjoying this small yet sweet conversation with the baker. It was lively, and lighthearted and felt nice after a long day. He could get used to the baker’s effervescent personality.

He feels a bit queasy. What are these feelings? Such unrestful emotions are similar to what humans feel when they enjoy someone’s company. Why is this happening all of a sudden?

"Neuvillette!" His thoughts are cut short by her gleaming smile. "Thank you." 

It had been a while since he heard those words. His statement from earlier had now become a concrete thought in his mind. The baker was worth choosing his morality over his judgment for.

A smile finally shined on his face.

"You're welcome."

©definitelysel

please do not copy, claim as your own or translate. plagiarism will not be tolerated.

thank you for your time <3

[yoyoyokii]

Avoidant

Zoro x Reader

was meant to be fluff, became angst kind to comfort to fluff?

Originally wrote this @mazzieboohoo in my notes app (a girls best friend) instead of sleeping BUT I workshopped it a bit more so here TAKE IT

I don't care if it doesn't make sense that's not my problem

2.5k words

༺｡° .ᘛ𓆩♡𓆪ᘚ. ° ｡༻

Avoidant.

That’s the best, and probably the only, way to describe your boyfriend right now. He seems to spend every waking moment prioritising his training, and while you aren't all that mad at having the opportunity to watch your EXTREMELY attractive lover show off his muscles as his sweat glistens deliciously beneath the harsh rays of the sun, you couldn’t help but worry about him. Okay… you were also beginning to get kind of - well, more than kind of - jealous at the way a stack of metal was getting more attention from Zoro than you were… no! You are a good girlfriend! So- Mainly you are worried. 

Stress and conflicted feelings are gnawing at his heart, it's so obvious, even to Luffy, Mr Oblivious himself! It doesn't help that, in typical Zoro fashion, his choice of resolution is to suppress these emotions at all costs. This was probably the least desirable trait of his, apart from his shocking navigation skills obviously, and you just wish he wouldn't be so difficult when it came to things like this. The whole crew feels like they have to walk on eggshells around him, it's just tiring at this point. His attitude has been hard on everyone, especially for poor Chopper, who sees your boyfriend more-or-less as a father figure and is now convinced that Zoro hates him. 

He isn’t himself when it comes to the nighttime either, in fact, this is now the part of the day that you dread the most. He has been making an unhealthy habit of clambering into your shared bed in the early hours of the morning, absolutely reeking of sake. He then becomes completely restless and spends those minimal hours of rest stirring about, keeping you awake while he's at it. Every night you beg him to talk to you about it, and every night he plainly tells you it’s nothing, and goes back to borderline ignoring you. You aren't quite sure what hurts more, the fact that he is ignoring you, or the fact that he is just straight-up lying to you.

“Hey, I’m sure he’ll be fine, you’re worrying too much” Nami manages to pull you out of your thoughts, smiling at you before sitting at your side. She joins you in enjoying the pleasantry of the summer breeze and you can’t help but pout a little at her words. She is right. She is always right.

“I’m not worried, just making sure he doesn’t hurt himself.” you lie, squinting your eyes as you look out at the sun setting beyond the horizon. The afternoon glare makes your head ache a little and you are sure that you're falling victim to, what is going to be, a painful sunburn. Oh well, that's a problem for your future self. 

Nami huffs at your pathetic attempt at a lie, before swiftly changing the topic. She begins to talk about how perfect the upcoming weather is going to be for your travels to the next island or something. You know she is just trying to lighten the mood, but you can't really focus. Honestly, you feel nauseous, and there is now a growing pit of anxiety bubbling in the depths of your stomach. You begin to question if it's all your fault, that maybe you are the root cause of Zoro’s distress. This uneasiness spurs in your gut and becomes more unbearable, bile threatening to rise beyond its threshold. You begin to think about how the both of you had only really become official recently, after flirting back and forth for months, and how it had only been since then that he had been acting so… off-

“HEY- are you even listening to me?!?!" Nami yells as she nudges your shoulder. You pretend to draw back in pain, attempting to pull off some sort of comedic relief. It's more for yourself rather than to distract Nami from the fact that you didn’t hear a single thing she said (not paying her attention can be fatal...). BUT LUCKILY FOR YOU- 

She just stands, grabbing at your arm to pull you up with her. She now holds your hand and leads the two of you back to everyone else. She utters something about dinner almost being ready and you can't help but to laugh as she enthusiastically declares that it is gonna be the most delicious thing you’re ever going to taste because she ever-so-kindly requested the dish herself. Yeah, she has definitely just used Sanji again to feed her cravings like the girlboss she is🤷 

You couldn’t stomach dinner, no matter how delicious it was, and to sweet dear Sanji’s dismay you had to excuse yourself from the table. Unfortunately, the ease you previously felt from Nami’s presence disappeared as quickly as it appeared, and so you now find yourself sitting on the floor of the soldier deck. 

The stars are abnormally bright tonight, the full moon stares back at you with a sort of glare that makes it feel as if it's empathising with you. You lean back against the Thousand-Sunny's railing and curl your legs up, hugging them against your stomach. As the breeze toys with the fallen strands of your hair and you gaze upwards into the night, you can’t help but wonder if the myth of cosmic love was true. You can’t help but wonder if you and Zoro shared this connection, or if it was all just a love of convenience for him.

It’s these strings of thought that bring you right back to the day that he had finally confessed to you. You reminisce on how you went to bed that night kicking your feet and smiling like an idiot to yourself. You remember thinking about your future with him, and how, when your heart finally began to calm and you dozed to sleep, you found yourself dreaming of everlasting love. Yes, it was embarrassing and childish, even you’ll admit it, but it was nice to finally feel wanted romantically, especially by someone as stoic and stone-faced as Zoro.

You can’t help but smile fondly, albeit a little sadly, at this memory. If only there was to be a shooting star, so that you can wish to go back in time to this moment, to relish in that feeling of giddiness for just a little longer. 

Scouring the night sky for any glimmer of hope, or just for something to distract you from the heaviness adorning your chest, someone’s presence disturbs your failing attempt at finding peace.

Zoro.

He moves to sit with you. A weird sort of tension begins to hang so thickly in the air that you believe you might suffocate. You aren’t prepared for this sudden confrontation, for him to so casually approach you as if he hasn't been avoiding you for god knows how long. Before you can muster up the courage to finally break the silence and say something, he does it for you.

“I’m sorry.” His voice is firm and unwavering, almost intimidating yet somehow soft at the same time. It's as if he never actually intended to hurt you. You should be mad- no more than mad, borderline ready to fight him! After all this stress he caused you, he can only say sorry??? But no. You force yourself to be the bigger person.

“It’s alright.” You pause your thought, now turning your head to look at him. But before you can continue, he interrupts.

“No… it’s not alright” his brows furrow and he returns your graze, staring so deeply into your soul that it almost burns.

“Before you say anything. I need you to know that my shitty actions were not a result of anything you’ve said or done. okay? I know how you tend to overthink.” He breaks his intense eye contact to look down at his lap, almost like he’s hesitant, seemingly taking his time to formulate his next string of words in a way that wouldn’t make you feel guilty. Before he can continue to explain, he pauses. You know that he's expecting your usual snappy reply that's fueled with some snarky remark or joke. That's how you usually respond when a situation gets too serious for your liking. He knows what to expect from you, so when this awaited response never comes, he realises that you must be gathering your thoughts. And so, he decides to give you a few minutes. 

He said he knows you. And it’s true, he knows you like no one else does. You really were just overthinking to the point that it was making you a complete mess. A tear of relief slips from your eye as you fight the urge to fully break down. You quickly go to wipe the tear away, but this action doesn’t go unnoticed by Zoro, of course it doesn’t.

“What? Is something wrong with your eye?” God he’s so daft sometimes. His question is so ridiculous that it almost makes you laugh. However, you just can’t control it anymore and more tears continue to flow.

 “Hey- are you okay? Why are you crying?”

You feel too stupid and selfish to admit that he was the root cause of your tears, so of course, you lie. Again.

“Well… do you ever look at something so beautiful that it makes you want to cry? That’s how a full moon makes me feel, and it’s extra beautiful tonight…” you attempt to steady your breathing as you fake a smile towards him. 

The warmth of his hand moves to sit against the side of your face as he uses his thumb to wipe away a new stream that's spilled over the curve of your cheek. The familiar feeling of his skin against yours is so comforting that it is his touch alone that begins to heal the uneasiness plaguing your heart. And so you lean further into him, welcoming this newfound sense of solace. 

“Of course I do, that's how I feel whenever I look at you.”  

It's this statement that constricts your throat to the point of no return and forces you to choke out the most pathetic sob. At first Zoro’s visibly confused by this, not understanding why you’ve had such a visceral reaction to his words, after all, he was simply telling the truth. If he feels uncomfortable by your emotional outburst he doesn’t show it. He instead wraps his burly arms around your shuddering frame and holds you so securely that you’re sure you are going to suffocate. But come on, we all know you wouldn’t have it any other way. 

Now. It’s a common misconception that Roronoa Zoro is too much of a ‘tough guy’ to be affectionate, that he is always too stern for his own good. But this isn't true, especially when it comes to you. Yes, he’s straightforward, overly suspicious at times, and generally a serious guy. But, he’s also loyal, caring, and would die for his crew. Just because he doesn't like to publicly display his gratitude for everyone, it was always there, and his little acts of love for the crew never went unnoticed by you. He knows this about you, that you always take notice of others, it’s part of the reason as to why he loves you so much. 

Your body crumples against his torso, weeping into his chest. You can’t help but to apologise, suddenly feeling guilty for interrupting such a rare confession.

“I’m sorry, I’m so selfish for crying…” you say in between stuttering breaths as you attempt to stabilise your emotions. “I thought you hated me. I’m just so relieved!” 

He stays quiet, listening intently to you as he runs his fingers through your hair.

“Zoro, please talk to me. I’m sorry for interrupting, please tell me what’s bothering you, I hate that you’ve been struggling alone.” You’re rambling now and your words are being muffled by the material clinging between his torso and your lips. You don’t care. You only pray that he listens to you.

“You care too much about me,” he chuckles softly before pressing a kiss to the top of your head. “The reason I’ve been such an asshole is because I’ve never loved someone like I’ve loved you. I don’t usually worry about this kind of stuff, but I think I'm a bit shit scared of my own feelings.”. 

You cradle your head upwards, looking up at him with your now puffy, red eyes. Now you listen.

A deep sigh escapes from his taut lips, “It’s just… the last time I cared for someone. Well, you know how that ended.”.

He doesn’t have to say anything else. The point has been made, and you nod in a sympathetic understanding. His eyes grow glassy, tears threatening to spill through his eyelashes. You’ve never seen him so vulnerable. You don’t want to pry, and you know that words of comfort don’t work on someone like Zoro, so you stay silent, instead opting to reach up to cradle his head into your chest. This change in dynamics is definitely not something he is usually comfortable with, but it’s what he needs right now. This loving action pushes him over the edge, and funnily enough, he’s now the one sobbing into your arms instead.

You both sit like this for a while, with you sitting patiently, drawing imaginary soothing circles on Zoro’s upper back. His tears dried a while ago and you aren’t sure how long it’s been since anyone last spoke, but you’re willing to wait until the end of time if it meant that he could feel a moment of comfort within your arms. 

Your reassuring touches do make him feel better. He’s never felt so loved. So cared for. He’s never been the one on the receiving end of a hold so intimate and full of empathy. The idea that someone will willingly listen to him without judgment, that someone can accept his words without forcing a solution.

“This must have been hard, I'm proud of you. Thank you for talking to me.” You finally say, in the softest voice you can muster. He breaks away from your hold so gently, as if he’s afraid that moving too hastily will break you (you are his most precious possession after all). 

You both now sit in a weird and quite awkward entanglement of limbs, staring at each other in a newfound sense of mutual agreement of understanding. Everything makes sense to you, and Zoro finds comfort in knowing that his worries have been heard. A win-win some would say. 

Neither of you say anything, it's pointless. Words can’t show how grateful you are for one another. It’s like they always say, actions speak louder than words, right?

And so he kisses you. 

It definitely isn’t the first time you’ve kissed, but it’s the first time you’ve kissed like this. It’s all-consuming, so filled with love that it’s almost overwhelming, you believe his mouth is heaven; his tongue the eternal paradise. There’s a certain kind of bliss that can only be found in the tenderness of Zoro’s arms, and you wish more people understood saw his soft side, but maybe it's just meant to be your secret to keep. He never meant to be cruel. He just loves you. He always will.

[itsgrimeytime]

bite marks || rick grimes x f!reader

based off: anon request and Hot Gum by SOFIA ISELLA

Summary: That night was a nightmare, with blood spilled and threats to your group's lives. You weren't sure that everyone could recover from it, including yourself. What Rick did had to be done, there was no other choice. You knew that. So, why did it keep replaying in your head? And why did you like it?

TWS: NSFW mdni (18+), teasing, fingering, oral (fem receiving), body worship, a little degradation, hint of blood kink, hickeys, biting, dom/sub undertones, possessiveness, oral fixation, overstimulation, hint of pain kink, begging, unhinged!Rick, murder jacket!Rick, death mention, gore, violence, all things typical of TWD.

[[A/N: hello anon!!! Thank you so much for being my first request, it means a lot <3. I will say this will be my first ever smut, so please don't judge me or I'll cry. You know that tag on AO3 'porn without plot'? This is the exact opposite. This baby has so much fondness and plot and slow-burn energy that I didn't mean to give it. I hope you enjoy !!! ]]

The night was quiet, the low buzz of adrenaline dipping beneath the stars -there was no need to fight anymore. All your senses heightened, rest felt a bit like an uncomfortable itch under your skin -something you couldn't stand to do.

Eyes flickering like an animal in the night to any particular noises, you were positive that getting a wink of sleep was definitely out of the cards. At least for now.

Plus, there was the thing.

The heavy tension that hung over your group like a dark cloud -the gnashing of teeth, the spitting of blood. The instinctual movements, nothing behind his eyes but heavy anger, beyond anything you'd ever seen. It was like a predator, instinctively stalking its prey without remorse, without thought, just... just to survive.

Your head was spinning.

Eyes flickering to your side, you watched him. He wasn't asleep, you could tell -leaned up against the car with a stare of a thousand yards. Part of you wanted to talk to him, try and help him find some solace -reiterate it was the only option, he did what he had to-

'He's mine,' the low growl made you freeze -eyes glazing over in a way they hadn't in a while as you sought to catch Rick in his rage-

But the other half was... conflicted.

Very, very conflicted.

Sighing, you squeezed your hands together -trying to turn over the event in your mind and just move past it. You knew that Rick would hardly want to talk about it, nevertheless your...

It wasn't the time for those kinds of thoughts, despite them clawing up your throat -mere ideas of 'what if he was that protective over me?' or what it would feel like to have his mouth on your pulse point. When you know he could so easily take a drag of the teeth and-

You cleared your throat, turning your attention instead to the night sky -trying to cool down and clear your head. Of everything.

"Can't sleep?" He rumbled out, a sort of sleepy fondness in his tone rather than the biting rage from before-

It was going to be a long night.

You took a deep breath, dragging your eyes down from the stars -despite your better judgment. Always eager to feel the little humanity left in the world, you looked to him -his face was still covered in red but his eyes were much more attentive.

Focused.

"Nope," you answered, finally, voice shaking just slight enough for him to notice, "-it's hard to explain."

Rick seemed to gesture at his face, blood still encrusted on the skin (desperation to protect what was his-) leveling, "Try me."

You bit at your lip, hoping somewhere far off in your head that the night hid your face enough to excuse the redness, "I just. I feel like I should be doing more. Or even just anything at all. I'm... I'm restless."

"Hmm," he mumbled out, deep tone rattling something up your spine, "-I'm kinda the opposite. But I just... I can't rest."

There was something in the tone that wildly grounded you to the very current moment -Rick was distraught, worried. He believed he'd failed, you could just tell. He believed he'd done something past the line, and lost his humanity. His empathy. And in this world, it's the first step of a downward spiral.

With extra careful movements, to not wake those around you, you made your way across many of your group. They were all asleep, but still, somehow all connected -holding each other like it's the last thing they'd ever do. You made it to a spot beside him, setting an appropriate distance, you leaned against the car with a manufactured ease.

"What if I stayed up?" You asked, genuinely -eyes upturned to the sky (you couldn't look him in the eyes so close, you didn't want to risk it.)

Rick stilled beside you, you could feel him freeze -it almost made you itch to reach out for him, but you cut the thought short, "I can't ask ya to do 'at, Y/N."

"You didn't ask me, I offered," you started, looking at him before dashing away to the dwindling fire. It had been made with some extra supplies that had been packed up. It was a little but it went a long way. Looking back to the pile that had accumulated nearby, you assessed -it was mostly extras of things you didn't need so much of. Books, copy paper, twigs, some extra diapers from one of Judith's emergency packed bags-

You paused, her emergency bags...

"But," you responded, quickly standing, "-I think I have something that can help, anyway."

Digging around into some of the supplies, you had your eyes set on one thing. You knew it was there -you had packed it yourself. It was a lucky run, a store almost completely in stock and unaffected to the outside.

Finally, the package peaked up at you -pastels and what seemed to be baby zoo animals scattered along the plastic smiling. You grinned, a bit proud of yourself for finding them so-

"Baby wipes?"

Something in your stomach twisted at the grumble of 'baby' smoothing across his lips, but you pushed it down, "Don't sound so judgmental, Grimes, hear me out first."

He smiled, it was light -you imagined the smallest gust of air might shoo it away but you still counted it, "Okay, okay. I'm listenin'."

You pursed your lips, before cementing your tone -seriousness embedded in the fiber of your being, "For your face, I think... I think it might help if you cleaned up.

Rick softened, the smile growing into something more fond. The crow feet by his eyes making the lightest of an appearance, and you had the instinct to trace them for a moment -before shaking your head to clear the train of thought.

"You know," he smirked in the teasing kind of way he always did, "-if you wanted to touch my face you coulda just said so-"

You scoffed -trying to hide the blooming pink on your face and clear your mind of being so close, "Oh, fuck you, Grimes, do it yourself."

And you threw the package at his head, right at the grin that made your head spin in a new kind of way. Those teeth had-

You could handle this, right? Just give it a few days.

A few weeks, actually.

Or maybe a month.

You were trying, genuinely, to deal with it -if you could pinpoint exactly what it was, you could avoid it. So, you started testing things from a distance.

Trying to talk to him up close, was a no. All you could think about was his mouth, salt and pepper stubble stretched across his lips, and the low grumble of his voice-

No. Couldn't work.

So, you tried sitting farther away. Watching from a distance, and talking from a distance, if he noticed it, he didn't say anything. That one couldn't work either though, as you watched his hands (long, calloused fingers and palms that had surely-) flip through the pages -apparently, it was a log of everything the camp had left. Not that you had noticed at all.

And then, trying and trying again, you found Alexandria. A beautiful place with open doors, food, and shelter. You couldn't remember the last time you slept on a mattress, or had your own kitchen-

It was bliss, other than some paranoia here and there -mistrust bubbling up in the community, you'd found yourself comfortable there. And then, you'd unexpectedly gone to the Grimes house -urgently needing to pass on some news, you couldn't remember what now, or who, or anything about it really. He'd opened the door clean-shaven and shirtless, you couldn't get out of there fast enough.

Your solution was a simple one, just avoid the problem at all costs -going on any and every run offered to you (as long as Rick wasn't going, and with the new responsibilities of Alexandria, he hardly was), keeping conversations quick and short, and trying desperately hard to keep Rick far, far away from you.

And thinking back on it, maybe that's where it went wrong.

It was late, you knew that much. You didn't know exactly how late -your head just wouldn't stop, and you'd scampered out of bed before you could even look at some of the clocks -if they were even set properly.

You'd decided to go out on your porch, and watch the stars -they kind of felt like the only thing that was the same these days. You could remember stargazing from meadows when you were young, your parents pointing to the constellations they knew, and you eager to see any kind of shooting star.

Something was comforting about knowing it was the same sky, even though it felt so different. And you, you were so different.

"We gotta stop meetin' like this," he hummed, dragging your attention from the sky to himself -leaning out on the railing of his own porch. Almost like he was trying to bridge the gap from your house to his.

You laughed, at ease with the distance between the two of you (despite your eyes catching on his light t-shirt and plaid pants that hung a little too low), correcting, "You should, you have things to do in the morning, I, on the other hand, can sleep until the sun sets again. You're just being irresponsible."

Rick laughed, shaking his head -your eyes followed the movement, "Ain't you helpin' cook for the dinner party tomorrow?"

Oh, you realized before responding, "That's at like 5 pm, gives me plenty of time to-"

"Carol gets up at like 6 to gather everythin' up."

You fell silent, before commenting -a bit in exaggeration but still real, you hadn't slept this good in years, "Then, no, I am not helping."

He only laughed more, and something in your stomach swirled. It wasn't new. Nothing with Rick was new. You'd always known he was handsome (even under the sweat and the dirt this world brought), and seeing him so gentle with his kids... It was expected when your heart started up at the reigns.

"I missed this," he said suddenly, open and vulnerable -Rick had a way of just doing that. You could only envy it.

You played dumb, actively ignoring it -you knew you'd hurt him, and you didn't want to think about it, "Missed what?"

"You," he answered -simply, honestly, "-talkin' to you. You don't-"

Rick stopped, sighing somewhere deep in his chest and pinching the bridge of his nose -your gut twisted in guilt, "Look... can we talk? Inside?"

You stilled, your head spinning in the sort of way that always somewhat meant to get away, you hadn't sorted it all out yet. And he knew something was up, he was going to ask-

Your mouth moved before you could coach what to say, "What about Judith?"

He paused, the frown on his face brief but still settled there -careful and considerate, "We can talk in yours, if you're more comfortable with that."

Your first instinct, a strong instinct that had never led you wrong, said no. It would be too much, and you'd ruin the friendship you had with Rick if he figured any of this out. ANY of it. But your second instinct was softer, it knew Rick well. It could tell he was hurt by something you'd done -you could imagine what, and he wanted to fix it. Hell, he just wanted to talk.

"Yeah," you answered -hands a little too tight on the railing, voice screaming in your head, "-we can do that."

The next few minutes, your heart was pounding in your chest -loud and boisterous as you went into your home. Rick would be following close behind, you thought to yourself -distantly. Barely there, you spun into the kitchen, urging somewhere deep in your mind to get a barrier. A wall between him and you, something to do with your hands instead of-

"Can I get you some water?" You asked, clearing your throat and shifting your footing -not now, not now, not now.

Rick was tall, practically owning every room he came into -a presence larger than life. You'd always noticed that, really, he'd had just a powerful energy, one that you could feel as soon as he stepped into a room. It was a shift in the air, enough for your breath to slink out of your lungs-

"Yeah," he answered -oblivious to your own head, "-if ya don't mind."

He was close, naturally so, a tick to your right between the counters -waiting patiently. You instinctively swayed further to the left, the bristling feeling of his body heat making your head spin -a dizzy sort of intoxicating drift of his woodsy scent echoing into your nose-

Without thinking, you dropped the cup to the floor -shattered on the tile.

"Shit, Y/N-" Rick remarked, crouching down to the tile, using one of his hands to push your hip back (you almost couldn't breathe), "-ya got a broom?"

"Yeah, yeah," you swallowed, voice strained and head still dizzyingly spun, "-should be one in the closet in the hallway."

Just before he turned to go and get it, his eyes settled on you -slinking over your stiffened posture and the tone of your voice, "Are you... Everythin' okay?"

"What? Yeah," you tried to laugh -it came out pretty pathetic, "-why? Uh, why do you ask?"

Rick stepped forward -hand reaching to soothe, and you instinctively stepped back. Shit.

He frowned, something glazing over his eyes, and a twist of guilt settling itself deep in your stomach like a stone in a pond. His hand extended into empty air, he gently brought it back to himself -a flash of something deep in his eyes and frown only growing larger.

"This..." he sighed -trailing off into a quiet tone, "-this is what I wanted to talk 'bout. Mind if we go somewhere else? I'll clean up the glass later-"

"We can," you agreed -voice a little squeaky, and you barely let it stand in the moment's silence. Quickly, turning off into the living room, not waiting for him -you were running on self-preservation at this point. Your heart beating quickly in your chest, you kept your mind sane, calm, together-

You sat on the couch -not daring to uncross your legs. The sort of twist in your stomach was much different now, pillowing back and forth like a tidal wave.

"You can't even look at me," he echoed, voice distant -despite him standing off to the right of you, pacing, "-I just. I know you've been actin' weird since the run-in with the Claimers-"

You stilled -teeth gnashing, the thrum of his deep voice, the tightening of his jaw, the protectiveness in every line of his body, "Can we not talk about that?"

Rick paused, attention back on you -curious, confused, and heartbroken, "Look, I kno' that I lost it a lil' that day and I'm sure it was scary, but-"

"Rick, no, not-" you suddenly echoed, standing and approaching him on instinct -to comfort, to soothe, "-you did everything right that day. There weren't many options, and you did what you had to."

"But I scared ya. I know you're afraid of me-"

"Rick-" you started, desperate to explain, to get the pain out of his tone.

"You just have to know," he echoed, continuing as if you'd never even spoken -hands trailing to hold your arms, comforting, soothing but your brain only lit up at feeling, "-I would never hurt you."

"Rick-" you relented, sighing deep in your bones -air flushing out of your lungs, "-fuck, it's not... It's not that."

He stilled, eyes wavering over you in concern (sweet, your mind commented) "What's wrong then? You can't just avoid me an' not tell me, what's wrong. I'm done with 'at."

"Ugh," you groaned -the words not willing to come out of your lips, shimmying out of his hold and taking a few steps back, "-It's embarrassing."

"Embarrassin'? What are you talkin' about?"

"Fuck, I don't-" you ran a hand through your hair -frantic, and talking to yourself, "-maybe if I just come out and say it?"

"Y/N..." he started, roaming closer -trying to reach out and stop the pacing, help you, "-ya know you can tell me anything."

"God, you're not making this easy, you know?"

Rick furrowed his eyebrows, trying to catch your eyebrow -desperate, hurting, "Makin' it easy? Y/N just talk to me-"

And maybe it was because he had caught your eyes, even for just a second -blue desperate, pleading. He just wanted to fix it. Or maybe it was because your patience had worn thin, you were sick of hiding it-

Either way, it just came out.

"Fuck, I was into it."

The silence was deafening, as you tried to hide behind your palms -cheeks burning a furious red. But you couldn't stop it.

"So, no," you clarified, clearing your throat, "-I am not scared of you. At all. And I'd really appreciate it if we didn't talk about it."

Rick spoke, and you weren't looking at him but you could hear something there -low in his voice, "Speak for yourself."

Stilling, you turned to match him -finding something you knew in him, something instinctual, "What...?"

"What part?" he asked, leaning into your space -hand skipping up your side, fingers brushing up your skin, "Was it the anger? The blood?"

"Rick," you breathed out, breathless -heart racing against your chest, "-you don't have to."

He didn't respond immediately, fingertips dragging up agonizingly -your shirt riding up just slightly at the pressure. The hand ended up on your chin, holding it with his thumb and leveling his eyes with yours -and the heat that echoed through your skin seemed so suffocating. You felt like every part of your body was molten -your stomach twisting into something far different than guilt.

"Darlin', this ain't a chore."

"Rick-" you exhaled, tension thick as your eyes flicked between his and down to his lips. They were so close-

He sighed, pushing ever so slightly more into your chin, other hand riding up under your shirt -fingertips dancingly along your ribs, "Maybe I was thinkin' about this all wrong, hmm?"

You tried to speak, but he cut you to the chase -all low voice and you could feel his breath on your skin. Some part of you relished in the warmth, sensations dancing behind your eyes as all you could do was watch.

"I think," he moved even closer, your breaths mingling and head spinning -your legs weak and brain turning to a familiar buzz, "-I think y'er favorite part was my mouth."

A breath caught in your chest, held up simply by his hands -your knees buckled but all you wanted was to feel them, eyes dipping to his lips like it would change something, "Rick, please-"

"Please what, darlin'?"

"Kiss me," you echoed -instinctual.

He didn't hesitate, sweeping forward to connect his lips to yours -fast and it lit a fire somewhere in your stomach. And despite the rush, he'd been languid -trailing his hands up to the sides of your face. Big palms holding you still, lips chapped and the brush of his stubble leaving something so buzzed there.

He licked along your teeth, pushing you back into the wall with a force that made your head spin. You startled briefly from the impact, and he pulled back -tilting your chin to the side with one hand. Calloused fingertips leaving something burning there in their place, you didn't think you could speak-

"God," he nosed around your neck -pointedly close to the vein, and all you could do was whine, "-so pretty like this."

You groaned, hands splaying across his shoulders -feeling along the muscle there (god, you wanted to see), "Off, Rick-"

"You first," he echoed, hands trailing down to the hem of your shirt -tugging up. His fingers brushed across your skin there, and something in you weakened -you threw your arms up and he guided the fabric off. Big hands following it all the way up, he left a trail of goosebumps behind -as you tried to grab at the buttons of his flannel.

Mindlessly grabbing at the fabric, he merely chuckled.

"Patience, sweetheart," he hummed trailing his fingers along your skin -down to the band of your pants, hands dusting under them, "-let's focus on you for now, yeah?"

Breathless, you responded, "O-Okay."

"Good," he mumbled, leaning down without a breath of hesitance -mouthing along your jaw. Kiss after kiss after kiss, his tongue traced down your shoulder -avoiding your neck, particularly. Lips meshed with your skin, you reached up and grabbed some of his hair -thick curls between your fingers, he grunted against your skin.

"Please," you echoed, bubbling up from your throat -his teeth scrapping back up to your collarbone. He traced the bone, biting onto it -gentle and still something so desperate. You leaned your head back against the wall -moaning slipping through your lips through every drag of his tongue.

"That what you want?" he echoed between pressing kisses over your chest -tantalizingly close, "Wanna be all marked up? All mine?"

"All yours," you repeated -the thrum of his voice echoing off your skin, "-all yours."

"Hmm," he muttered pressing a finger to your neck, rubbing gently over your jugular -teetering over the area, "-gotta do it where 'ey can see then, don't I?"

"Yes. yes-" you begged, hands desperate all over his chest, "-please. I want them to see."

Rick grinned, nosing along your jaw -puffs of breath against your skin that made your head spin. Buzzing through your senses, you could feel everywhere he touched you -one hand rubbing along your hip, calloused thumb, and the burn of his hot breaths dissipating along your skin.

And then he finally leaned forward.

"Rick," you moaned, arching into him, as his lips latched onto the vein -taking the skin between his teeth, "-Rick, I can't-"

He only tugged, and your eyes rolled back at the spark of pain there. Teeth grazing, it left a pleasant sort of burn -as he held your head still, kissing along the spot with his lips desperately. Like he wanted all of you. Like he needed all of you.

Rick pulled back with one last languid kiss, tugging at the waistband of your pants, "Off, take these off-"

You were compliant, tugging them down with a quick motion and kicking them off your feet -vulnerable but your mind was in such a haze, you hardly noticed it.

"Beautiful," he hummed, hands dancing along your waist -trailing along your underwear, teasing, "-so beautiful, darlin'."

"More, Rick, please-"

He mouthed around your collarbone and you gasped at the sensitivity -the biting air brushing over his marks, they were so fresh. Only moving down your skin, through the dips and crevices, and your head only lit up with a rush of crimson -eyes bleary with pleasure. He focused in between your chest, leaving traces all along your skin -a beautiful dark path of bruises.

And then his fingers brushed across the fabric -timid and teasing. You groaned, rubbing onto his fingers, "Rick-"

He grunted, moving his hands swiftly to tug them down -rushed and desperate and instinctual. Your head spun as his breaths centered across your core -overwhelmed by the tension, you could not imagine you would last long.

Fingers brushing across your clit, your knees nearly buckled -a blinding bright flashing behind your eyes.

"Hey, hey," he spoke, looking up at you (big blues eyes a mere breath from the most sensitive part of your body) -keeping one hand on your hip, extra support, "-stay with me, sweetheart. Gotta remember this, so you know who treats you best, knows how to care of you, knows what you need-"

"You," you answered, breathlessly, "-you, only you."

He pressed a kiss to your inner thigh -gentle, sensitive skin making your whole body tense, "That's right, all mine."

His fingers trailing along your folds -calloused and gathering your wetness in smooth, slow, movements. Careful and gentle at a time when you were desperate, squirming, and whining -your hand thread deeply into his hair. A tinge in your heart at the fact he still wanted to be careful with you was overwhelmed by the need to have him there now. You didn't care if it was his finger, or his tongue-

He trailed along your core, teasing -blue eyes intent on your face watching every flicker there, every gasp. Before he pressed forward.

The slow sink of his finger made your eyes roll to the back of your head, a deep throaty moan pushing through you -loud. Rick's pupils were blown now, watching you squirm on his middle finger -twisting and grinding. He licked a long strip over your clit, and your head smacked against the wood -placing your free hand over your mouth, biting back the shrill moan you were sure was going to spill out.

Rick only quickened the pace, finger twisting in and out before it became two and your stomach tightened. Lips sucking relentlessly at your clit -teeth grazing across the sensitive skin, you used your hand in his hair to pull him closer (more, more, more). Words blabbering past your lips, broken and pleading, he only pushed harder, faster.

"I can't-" your voice shook, "-Rick, I-"

He merely kissed your clit, languid and slow and teasing, while his fingers kept up the pace -pounding against your skin so quickly it made you delirious. Head spinning and moans breaking out of your lips, every sensation felt so close. So close. So close-

And then you were shaking, bright lights flashing behind your eyes -squirming for any sort of more friction as it all built and flushed through your body. Pushing into his mouth and clenching his fingers, you felt your muscles spasm -eyes fluttering closed at the mere sensation of it all.

"Fuck," he grumbled out -pupils wide and watching your every move, finding his own finish, "-so pretty, so beautiful."

And before you could say a word, he pressed a gentle kiss on your lips -domestic, caring, tender. Grabbing the fabric of your nearby shirt and cleaning up, all his movement slow and caring -blue eyes flooding over your features like you were precious.

"I liked that shirt," you pouted, exhaustion biting at your tone and aching in your body but pushing past it to shove him gently. More like the press of a hand

Rick laughed -voice soft and a deep note of tired, "You can borrow mine if 'at makes ya feel better, sweetheart."

"Are you staying?"

"'Course, baby," he paused, eyeing you in that special kind of way except he was fond now -a beautiful, wonderful fond, and pushing back a loose strand of your hair, "-but, we should stay at mine, in case Jude wakes up. You okay with 'at?"

"Of course," you responded, teetering in place and leaning into his hand heavily.

He chuckled, trailing over the skin of your cheek, "So cute like this, darlin'."

You blushed, despite being in the situation you were in, he had just-

You cleared your throat, and wiped at your face like it would go away -playfully, "Oh fuck you, Grimes."

"Next time," he hummed, as natural as he could, before pulling you up -his rough hands in yours and smushing you into his side, "-Let's get you dressed, hmm?"

"Okay," you muttered, tucking yourself neater into his side.

And you thought for a second, that maybe it would all be okay. Maybe this could work.

You could at least hope it would.

And then, he leaned down and kissed your temple -a crinkly eyed smile aimed right at you, soft, domestic, caring... affectionate.

It could work, you decided -eyes laid hazily on him and everything he was, it could definitely work.

[graciereadshannigram]

NBC's Hannibal really Did That and created the most compelling and beautiful allegory for coming out in a world that is inherently violent towards queerness and treats it as horrifying, disgusting, and psychotic.

top of mind right now is Will's Becoming, started in S01E01 and fully completed in S03E13. buckle in folks, this may end up being a long one.

following the allegory, both episodes feature Will and Hannibal sharing a queer experience with one another.

in the first, Will (at this point, deeply closeted and in denial) engages with GJH in an effort to protect Abigail. Hannibal (also closeted, but more out of self preservation, certainly not out of shame) isn't directly involved, merely a passive observer, but he did orchestrate the experience by calling GJH to warn him they were coming. obviously, his actions at this point are driven by curiosity. what will GJH do? and what about Will? clearly, Hannibal has clocked Will as similar to himself (aka queer), but can see that Will is in deep denial and terrified of his urges.

and it's just so powerful to see that Will's first explicitly queer experience is within the context of self sacrifice for the good of someone else. he wouldn't have chosen it, but he had to do it. at this point, this is the only way his psyche will accept his queerness. this scenario also gives him plausible deniabilty about his reasons for engaging GJH. it allows him to admit to Alana that he feels "good" after the whole event, claiming that he feels good because he saved Abigail. even though we know at least part of the reason he feels good is that he finally got to indulge this particular urge.

but even so, the whole point of season 1 is Will struggling with his guilt. he has nightmares. he thinks he's a monster.

(side note: i also think it is just so perfect that it takes Will ten shots to get GJH, like of course our sweet baby queer boy having his first queer experience isn't very experienced. i can hard relate)

fast forward to the series finale, we find Will and Hannibal having yet another queer experience with one another, but this time they are equal participants and it is Will, not Hannibal, who ultimately orchestrated this encounter.

and what is so wonderfully interesting to me is that a (very) small part of Will seems to remain conflicted about what his role will be in this scenario right up until it is actually happening. will he walk away, leaving Hannibal and the Red Dragon to their own devices, and return to his heteronormative family? will he be an active participant with Hannibal? will he simply be a passive observer? the moment Will decides he's going to participate is so clear and this is the moment he fully, 100% comes into himself and arrives at full self acceptance.

and then, when it's finally over, and Hannibal holds him while saying, "see? this is all i ever wanted for you. for both of us." and Will, his eyes quite literally shining with joy and love says, "it's beautiful" while clutching Hannibal and resting his head on his chest, enjoying the embrace (do NOT get me started on Hannibal's expression of pure ecstasy, i will explode).

and to wrap it all up, we see Will quite literally take a leap of faith in the arms of his most beloved before tumbling off the cliff. together.

like. that is so fucking beautiful???? and i don't think there is ANY piece of media that will ever have this type of impact on me again?

anyway. congrats if you made it this far and stay tuned for more ramblings as i get my thoughts in order lmao i just really fucking love this entire show.

[creedslove]

DESERVE IT - PART FOURTEEN

Javier Peña x f!reader

Summary: Dinner goes wrong when Murphy can't control his anger over Javi's association with Los Pepes and uses you as a way to offend him. Javier isn't pleased and ends up taking out on you

Warnings: incorrect narcos plot, angst, hurt, offense, asshole!steve murphy, asshole!javier peña, mentions of break up, insinuations of cheating, smut, oral sex (f!receiving)

A/N: Hi besties, I hope you will like this chapter. I don't know how I feel about it, I liked some parts and hated other parts, but I feel it was necessary to the story and well asshole!javi is back, so enjoy!!! 🥺

• PART ONE TO THIRTEEN ON MY MASTERLIST

5k words

Olivia chewed her food slowly, her content face as she savored the mashed potatoes and well-cooked veggies and very so often shot you and Javi adorable little smiles. She was an adorable child, eating her own food which you also prepared, while the adults enjoyed their Italian and the bottles of wine.

You had already finished one with Connie before the boys arrived, so you really knew you should stop yourself right there. You definitely didn't want to wake up vomiting all your way to work, you were definitely not ready to have Javier holding your hair back while you emptied your stomach in front of him. You knew he would do it without complaining, just as you would do it for him if he ever needed it, but you got really embarrassed at the thought of it. It wasn't a very sexy image. You were also in no mood to face any pregnancy jokes, because it seemed women were only designed to have one condition which implied growing a child in their womb, especially at your work environment where it was dominated mostly by men and their narrow points of view or women like Colleen who would love to overhear a juicy gossip and spread it through the country even if it had no proof of it being real.

And the third reason was because death would probably be sweeter than facing a hangover in the Colombian heat.

So when Murphy offered you another glass, you politely declined, helping yourself to another slice of lasagna, hoping you could filter the alcohol in your blood by putting something in your stomach.

He shot a glance and raised the bottle at Javi who also shook his head, which you thought was odd. Javier Peña never refused a chance to get intoxicated in alcohol.

You went back to focusing on Connie's story, though Javier's hand was restless on your thigh. That wasn't common of him either. Of course he had the habit of touching you, but he usually just rested his hand on your skin, however, you could feel how he squeezed your thigh softly, you didn't mind it at all, but you knew him enough to tell it wasn't normal. There was something bothering him, but not only him, Steve was also bothered, angry even, as he very often made snarky remarks towards your boyfriend. It wasn't unusual for the two agents to have conflicts concerning work, both of them were stubborn as a mule and if they didn't agree on something, things could get bad between them, but at the same time, they always managed to leave their work beefs at work, so whatever happened must've really angered Steve.

Javi took a deep breath, side glancing at you as you ate. He was hoping you would be satisfied enough so he could come up with any excuse to go home, at the same time he didn't want to rush you, it wasn't your fault he was a dumbass who only took bad decisions in life, well, not only bad ones, you were the living proof Javier could get some things right, but other than you, the rest was just a long shot.

When Steve mentioned something about work, Javi began to restlessly trace patterns on your skin. It was as if he had gotten into a nervous state, though you didn't get what exactly happened, it was like the two of them had an inside joke going on, one that was not funny at all.

You then remembered your interaction earlier that morning, when you put on his shirt and Javi had told you he was going to wear that during his meeting with Messina and you immediately relaxed at the same time you felt your cheeks and the tips of your ears heating up at the immediate memory that flooded you of what came after he had mentioned the shirt. The way he'd gripped your neck, touched you and filled you up with every inch of himself. It felt like you had been lost in paradise. Also, it became a fair assumption the discomfort between the two agents was their boss's doing. She must have been feral on them during their meeting and Murphy probably blamed it on Javier, or Javier blamed it on Murphy like they usually did.

The tension you felt dissolved completely and you actually enjoyed your boyfriend's little touches under the table, they weren't erotic, - Javier wouldn't do that. Yes, he was the kind of guy who would definitely finger you under the table in a crowded place, but no, he would never even consider doing that if there were any kids nearby. But the touches were intimate, affectionate. You bit your lips, pretending you were listening to every single sentence in that conversation, but in reality you were trying to distinguish what exactly Javier's finger was invisibly drawing on your skin, you could feel steady lines, following a rhythm order and you couldn't help but smile big when you finally broke the code.

P

E

Ñ

A

That's what his fingers traced on your thigh.

It was so silly and childish, and yet a sweet reminder of your relationship. He marked you as his even unconsciously. You couldn't lie at all, it felt pretty good.

Olivia yawned big and felt her little eyes closing on their own as sleep became so intense she couldn't keep her little head from hanging low. Connie chuckled as she noticed her daughter being so sleepy and immediately got up, picking her up gently and disappearing into one of the rooms of the apartment.

Murphy took the opportunity his wife and daughter weren't in the room any longer and smirked as he raised yet another glass of wine towards you before killing it in one sip.

"So, Y/N… you and Javi are a thing, for real now, huh? Remember just how a few months ago he was a real dick to you? He treated you like absolute shit and even fucked a hooker that looked just like you, or so I heard…" he laughed softly "good thing you are a real sweet thing and you can overcome those ups and downs in your relationship, because trust me, sweetie, I'll really need this resilience"

Just as shock was everything that went through your body, anger was the only thing that ran through Javier's veins. You both could tell Steve was drunk from the amount of wine he'd had, but he should've known better than to bring shit up like that. It was none of his business, and still quite of a gray area for the two of you as you had pretty much ignored it and pretended it never happened, when in reality you just hoped everyone else would do the same. It had already been pretty humiliating and painful as it was and you definitely didn't need anyone, let alone Steve bringing that up.

Javier slammed his hands on the table, immediately getting up and pointing a finger at Steve's temporary madness. It was one thing if he was pissed off at him. If he wanted to punch Javier in the face he could even do it and Javi would definitely not give two shits about it, but teasing you and bringing you into that situation, that was too much for him.

"Shut the fuck up right now, Steve. Why are you even saying shit like that? I made a lot of mistakes but this is none of your fucking business, I don't talk about your personal life, so why are you doing this to us? To her?" He pointed at you, as you kept your head low, you felt so ashamed at that moment, still clueless to why such thing had been brought up like that, but Steve didn't care at all.

"Sorry Y/N, didn't mean to embarrass you, but I was also wondering if you know your wonderful boyfriend is being threatened by the head of the Los Pepes death squad? Do you know she has promised to end his career in the DEA by going to the american press?" He asked "can you believe that?"

You didn't say anything at the same time Javier's voice filled the room initiating an argument with Steve, hoping he would stop talking.

"Here's a great idea, Jav… instead of jeopardizing our entire mission, you could give in to your impulses and fuck Judy, maybe it will help us all… I'm sure Y/N wouldn't mind, deep down she knows she can't expect much from you… or maybe she would understand perfectly, I'm sure she would take this bullet for the team"

You didn't know why Steve was acting that way, why he was suddenly so angry, you could understand his frustration, of course but it didn't explain why he decided to use you as a target to hit Javier. He could have just talked about his posture as a cop, insist on argumenting how wrong associating with that squad was, but using personal elements to provoke Javier was too much.

"Why are you doing this Steve?" You finally raised your head and stared at him, your cheeks already wet with tears you couldn't control at the anger and shame of being treated that way by someone you thought was your friend.

You could have raised your voice, defended Javier, defended your relationship with him, but you felt so weak and small at that moment, as if you were just a stupid little girl who fell for the Romeo's cheap tricks. You knew you couldn't let Javier's past intrude your relationship, he had changed, he wasn't that jerk anymore, he was a good man, actually he had always been a good man but he didn't believe in himself. You believed in him and that made him believe as well, and that was why your relationship was working so perfectly, but no one, and especially no one you considered a friend had the right to bring those things up. It was mean, hurtful and you felt you couldn't stay there any longer. If Murphy had a problem with Javier, he should solve it with him, and not drag you into the eye of the storm.

You got up and grabbed your coat, walking to the door at the same time Connie returned from the room and watched the warzone her dining room became. She didn't understand why Javier was screaming at Steve at the same time her husband pointed at you and mumbled something she couldn't actually understand and you cried, but she knew it wasn't good.

She called your name, trying to make you stop, wanting to talk to you and ask you what was going on, but you turned your back to everyone and walked away, running downstairs and locking yourself up in your apartment.

Javier on the other hand was livid, he wanted nothing more than throw punches at Steve, he didn't understand where that attack came from, Javi knew he had all the right to be pissed at the Los Pepes association but that should have been handled in the office and not during a double dinner date, and not by attacking and teasing his girlfriend. Javi also knew it was the only way he would get a reaction from him. If Steve had said anything about Javier, he would have probably shrugged it off, but the moment he brought you into the deal then Javi got angry. To the point he didn't know any better and finally punched his friend, feeling Murphy's face under his fist and blood immediately soaking his pained knuckles. He didn't want things to go like that, but it was partially if not mostly Steve's fault for acting like a dick around them all.

Murphy immediately fought back, throwing a punch at Javi, who groaned and was ready to get back at the other man once more if it weren't for Connie screaming for them to stop. She was terrified, in all the years they'd been together, she'd never seen her husband act like that and especially not towards his partner.

She desperately asked them to stop, but Steve seemed to only had fallen back into his senses when Olivia also screamed in fear, so scared at the commotion happening in the living room and snapping her away from her sweet dreams.

Murphy finally stopped and looked at his wife's shocked face, then looked back at Peña, who was panting and wiping the sweat off his face.

"See the shit you did, Javier? You can never do anything right!" He said angrily and paced the living room, "my daughter's crying now, scared because of your fucking scene!!! Not that you understand what that means, because you are never gonna have that, Javier. Never! You'll screw up just like you did with your job, I don't even know why you still try it!"

•••

Javier immediately left the apartment and ran downstairs, the whole environment was suffocating him, but not as much as Steve's words. He knew people didn't take him seriously, not his friends, not his partners at work, not his hometown and not even his dad. And he never really cared about it, or the part of him that actually cared was long gone and buried. It was easier to handle things that way, Javier taught himself.

But lately he had learned to trust a little more in himself, because you had faith in him, you were the only good thing he had in life and he hated himself to be brutally reminded he didn't deserve you like that, he hated how you left the room crying, disappointment after disappointment. Of course to some extent blaming it on Steve was the logical attitude, but if it weren't for himself, there would be nothing Steve could have used against you. He had done all those things, he had humiliated you with a fucking prostitute, not only that, one that looked just like you, it was disgusting and low, and he honestly didn't know why or how you had forgiven him.

Even if the whole death squad drama didn't happen, you would still have to face shame for the rest of your life just because of the mere fact of being with him. It didn't matter where you went, if it was Colombia or Laredo, people would always point fingers at you, whispering and laughing at the fact you chose Javier Peña.

He wanted to disappear at that moment, it weighed so heavy in his chest, he felt so guilty and ashamed of himself.

At the same time he needed to see you, he wanted to avoid you. He hoped you weren't so upset, so broken at what happened, you were such a strong girl, but even he could tell Steve stroked a delicate point.

He stood in front of his apartment and opened the door, walking inside and calling your name, having no answer and swallowing hard, as he knew instantly you were back at your place. He ran his hand through his hair and sighed deeply, a bad feeling taking over him as his heart raced at the absence of you.

He turned around and went for your apartment instead, an anger filling his body, running through his veins. He knew he couldn't just aim his anger with Steve at you nor his self-hatred, but god, it made his blood boil not to find you there. All that talk about love, partnership and understanding just went to shit because of Steve's tantrum?

He didn't knock, instead he used his own key and burst the door open, making you jump off the couch startled. You sniffed as your eyes were red and puffy, being obvious you'd been crying for the past half an hour.

You looked at him, not liking how dark his expression was, he wasn't looking at you with soft, loving eyes, you could see the burning rage and you didn't know what else had happened, but you trusted he wasn't going to be childish and take it on you.

"What now?" He asked and folded his arms "is it because of Judy and her threats? Or is it still because of the hooker?" He asked annoyed and looked at you up and down. He was just so angry, at any other time, he would have wrapped his arms around your body, pulled you closer and made you forget all about what was hurting you, but at that moment, Javier's feelings were a turmoil and he couldn't control them.

You dried your tears and walked to him "why are you being so rude? It's not my fault" you said and stared at him, why Javier was snapping like that was beyond you.

Javier scoffed and shook his head "I'm not being rude, I just asked you a question, are you gonna cry about that too, Y/N? I thought all that talk about forgiving and believing I was a better man was real, but every single time something about my past comes up you're gonna cry like that?" He was visibly impatient at the same time he was willing to give everything in order to shut himself up before he could screw things up.

You frowned and shook your head "yeah, I meant all that when I said I believed you, and that I trusted you could be a better man, Javi… you are a good man" you said "but this is not the way of talking to me, it hurts Javi… I don't hold it against you, but it does hurt… it is something you did to hurt my feelings and you knew it… and now with Los Pepes… you are in danger, your career Javi… what if they try to kill you?" You blinked some more tears, but his expression was indecipherable.

He scoffed again and looked at you

"It doesn't make any sense, there's nothing any of us can do about it, cariño. I've always been a bad guy, too bad you couldn't see it, or you saw it and that was why you liked it so much"

Come on, Javier, don't say it.

He begged himself and bit his lower lip softly

"I don't think this will work, Y/N…"

You shook your head and took a step closer to Javier, he couldn't just regress to what he was before, no, you two had made such progress, you were so in love with each other, he couldn't just do what you thought he was about to.

"What are you talking about, Javi? It is working between us" you said as your breath accelerated and the blood in your ears almost made it hard for you to hear.

"It is working, but it's not gonna work in the long run Y/N"

"Are you breaking up with me?" Your voice cracked as you stared into his eyes.

No, never. He thought. He couldn't hold himself back now, he had made so much progress he was just so happy, he just wanted to fall on his knees and show you he was yours and only yours. But he didn't.

"Fuck this"

He said and turned around, walking out the door.

•••

You didn't keep track of how long you were crying by yourself. You couldn't believe and wrap your head around what happened. Just as you had got Javi, you had made plans with him, you had envisioned and fantasized a life of happiness and love with him, moving into his ranch, living your life next to him, maybe getting married one day and even maybe bringing a baby into the picture, all of that, it seemed so real to you and just like that he walked away from you.

Anyone could see it coming, but you couldn't, because they didn't know Javi the way you did, they didn't love him the way you did and they didn't know he loved you the way you did. He was so affectionate, so in love, always in need of touching and feeling you next to himself, he couldn't just walk away from you. Yeah, what had happened was bad, but all the path you walked together couldn't be undone just by one simple occasion. Steve's words couldn't be that powerful, could they? Or Javi wouldn't just break your heart with that stupid excuse of keeping you safe or because he knew you deserved better. That grew old, you didn't buy anymore. One part of you didn't believe your Javi, your lovely handsome boyfriend would ever do that, but on the other hand that was exactly what it looked like. He had just walked away with no further explanation.

You felt so lost, so alone as if the ground had disappeared off your feet and you desperately needed to find a grip back to reality. The beautiful moment you lived with him couldn't be over just yet, you couldn't accept that was ever all you would get of him because the cold truth snapped you away from the fairytale you lived for the past two months.

Those two months of pure happiness and bliss, of affection and amazing sex couldn't be the only thing to your relationship with Javi, because you were certain those two months would ruin the rest of your life, you would never be able to be happy again.

You desperately felt the need of being close to him, even if he had just left you wanted to feel his warmth, his embrace, smell his cologne, you wanted to cup his cheeks and make sure he was real, he was still yours.

So you didn't think twice before walking into his apartment. It was where you were supposed to be sleeping, where you should be tangling yourself into his body in bed, naked, rapid breathing and rhythm moves bringing the two of you to the bliss you craved so much with your man. Everything about that place hurt when you stepped inside. It had become so cozy, your true home, more than your own apartment and yet, the desperate possibility of not having free access to it every single day just made your heart tighten in your chest.

You didn't know where Javi went, a teeny tiny little part of your brain tried haunting you, planting the jealousy and anxiety seed, reminding you of all the shady sketchy places he often went to to pick up women before getting with you, but you quickly dismissed it. You had hopes it wasn't nothing but a misunderstanding, and even if it weren't, you thought Javier was better than that. Chances were he just went out to some bar to get drunk and forget that night ever existed, and it was what you should do too. If he had the right to low-key break up with you and go get drunk, then you also had the right to forget.

With the exception you we're already tipsy from all the wine you had had earlier, before everything went to shit, and that you were in Colombia and that was definitely not a safe place for a woman to walk alone at night.

Also, the fact you weren't a DEA agent carrying a gun for protection weighed on it.

A gun.

A gut feeling told you to immediately look for Javi's badge and gun, if he had left them at home, it meant he left for a bar or somewhere else, though you really didn't want to even think of that hypothesis.

You shook your head and got off his bed, going to the safe place he kept them both and opened it, finding it completely empty.

Your mouth went completely dry.

He had taken his gun and that could only mean problem.

When Javier drove back home he wanted to punch and kick himself for being that stupid. He couldn't even begin to explain to himself all the things he did wrong. Was it jeopardizing a whole investigation by allowing a death squad to finish the enemies they had in common? Was it letting his temper get in the way of his friendship? Yeah, Steve was a douche and he deserved that punch, not only for himself but for embarrassing you like that. As Javi had thought over and over: Steve could have talked about anything about Javier, but not about you. Not when you were so good to them, not when you were his girlfriend and Steve's friend. It was mean, cruel even and also a cowardly move coming from him. But now, thinking clearer, Javier knew he could have handled things better, maybe he could have just left and let the soberness of morning light handle the situation better. It would've been wiser to do that.

But out of all the bad things Javier did that night, definitely his attempt of pushing you away was the cherry on top of the cake.

He didn't know what had got into him, the whole situation led him to an unbelievable anger, one he should have aimed at anyone but you, because you were the only good thing in his life, you were the one who made it all worth it, you were the one he loved and wanted to have a future with.

And yet, he acted like a real bastard. He purposely hurt you, he left you in the dark and now he was terrified you had taken things to the letter, he just didn't know what he was going to do if you walked out of his life. If you did it, he would deserve it, but he was sure he would die.

Javi parked and got out of the car, his head pounding at the adrenaline and the booze, the punch, the stress and the fear of being alone. He sighed, he shouldn't have done any of the things he did that night, especially not after he grabbed his gun and left, but he saw no other way out. Javier took a look at your apartment door, you were probably there, asleep or crying yourself to sleep, as everything was dark and silent, so he just entered his place, knowing it would be just as dark and empty as it was the first day he moved in.

And you were there.

You were there as if nothing had happened, as if you hadn't been treated like shit by Steve first and then by Javier himself. He just couldn't believe it.

"Y/N…" he whispered and walked to you, seeing your puffy eyes, the tears caused by him, still present. You were still wearing the same dress as earlier, and god, you looked gorgeous, he wished he had told you before. When you were still having dinner with your friends, when he had his hand on your thigh, tracing his own name on your skin.

You didn't move, as you watched him walk towards you, you didn't see the storm in his eyes anymore, but you didn't see the joy in them, they were empty, sad… red.. was Javier tearing up? No, you must've been seeing things, you had never seen Javi cry.

Suddenly, he felt a wave of disappointment in himself, he knew what that scene looked like, even if he still carried his badge and gun, anyone who'd met him before would've guess he had taken a quick trip to a brothel and he felt ashamed of that, of himself and the fact people would always either laugh at you or would pity you for it.

"You're probably thinking I went to a whorehouse or something… Y/N I-"

You cut him off, shaking your head and whispering no repeatedly. Even if, yes, for a split second your anxiety made you consider the hypothesis, but you dismissed it right away, others could think whatever they wanted of Javi, but you knew him. You trusted him.

"No, Javi… I think better of you, I think the world of you and I trust you you wouldn't do this to me"

And that broke Javi.

Because you were too kind, you were too good for him, you were everything he didn't deserve it.

You always assumed the best of him, and he could never find anyone better than you. He wasn't in a whorehouse, he was at a whore's house. He went over to Judy Mocada's and against any better judgment he pointed a gun at her head, how her sicarios didn't kill him on the act, he would never know, but she thought it was intriguing, amusing even. What made a DEA agent hold her at gunpoint in the middle of the night definitely caught her attention.

He had made her an offer, she agreed and he needed to wait for her at the Embassy the next day. A part of him knew it was easy, too easy, actually, but he didn't care at that moment. In fact, he felt he should've blown up her head when he had the chance to.

And then he just wanted to go home and pick up the pieces of what he'd shattered.

And there you were, being too kind to him, being too loving, too affectionate. It just showed him little of a person he really was.

And standing right next to you, Javi felt onto his knees. His head looking up at you, all the love and admiration back in those beautiful brown eyes, his arms wrapped around your waist and pulled you closer.

"Soy un perro a tus pies"

Javier told you, his breathing was uneven as he waited for an answer that never came. You didn't have words to tell him, after all that happened in just one night you didn't know what to say. So instead, he decided to apologize to you in the best way he knew, the way he could speak beautifully without any words.

He sank his face into your core, lifting your dress up and quickly pulling your panties to the side. He lips didn't tease when they wrapped around your clit and sucked on it, feeling your characteristic warmth, your taste, and when your moans filled the room and your fingers ran through his hair, tugging and gripping at them, he thought that maybe and just maybe things would be alright again.

_____

A/N: it was a hard chapter to write, but it felt necessary to the story, I didn't want to ruin Javi's character development but I also wanted to show that deep down he is still the same insecure handsome broken agent we came to love 🥺🥺🥺

[calliesmemes]

IN-CHARACTER QUOTES FROM DISCORD

UNHINGED SENTENCE STARTERS FEATURING THINGS SAID BY MYSELF AND MY FRIENDS WHILE WRITING AS OUR MUSES IN A CRACK-BASED NONCANON GROUP CHAT. This post is dedicated to Em, Liz, Tanny, Nellie, Mel, Ange, and everyone else in the server who recognizes these quotes — you know who you are 😈

CHANGE gendered words and in-universe phrases as needed.

SPECIFY muse for multimuses.

“   Have you forgotten that you should not steal someone’s property? ”

“   I could slap that smug look off his face right now! ”

“   Your ears are a lie. ”

“   Woah woah that's - that's a bad word. ”

“   I don’t know if it’s allowed and quite frankly I don’t care. Fuck the rules. ”

“   Time for gremlin activities! ”

“   I hate this man. Let's prank him. ”

“   We are all going on strike today I swear ”

“   Looks like I need to invest in a kid leash. ”

“   DONT BE COWARDS!! JOIN THE STRIKE!! ”

“   I support her saying what needs to be said! I am done with the silencing of women!!!! ”

“   I like the dramatics. ”

“   I did not ask for a second opinion. ”

“   You seem to be doing a great job at being a nuisance. ”

“   NO BITING MY EMPLOYEES! ”

“   do you want me to bring you cheese? ”

“   Next move, start chewing on the door frames ”

“   I like crumbs. They are like a little midnight snack in my bed at night. ”

“   if he wants to be a worm, LET HIM BE A WORM ”

“   the rest of you suck my toe ”

“   To be fair I am simply vibing. ”

“   I am going to commit a war crime! ”

“   I am manifesting being happy. ”

“   Am I gonna talk shit WITH you guys? because im down to talk shit about pretty much anyone ”

“   Who says? We shall revolt without question. ”

“   Let's just start burning stuff. ”

“   Did you just call me... small? ”

“   Can I convert you with my kazoo propaganda? ”

“   We were radicalised by The Little Mermaid. ”

“   Penny in the swear jar, now. ”

“   My last words are, bros before hoes. ”

“   The old men are trying to be trendy. ”

“   I can do whatever I want too! ”

“   Can we go one day without an interruption from an American? ”

“   I am so sorry. He enjoys conflict. ”

“   Why is he so tall? ”

“   For legal reasons, kids, that's a joke. ”

“   Would you like to fight the adults? ”

“   You're not meant to bite people, it's frowned upon. ”

“   He’s a fun killer, don't listen to him! ”

“   Ow! Stop kicking me! ”

“   I have quite literally begged you not to kick, hit, or bite today. ”

“   BUT I thought we were buds, pals, amigos, chums, friends. ”

“   Oh shiiiii someone’s in trouble ”

“   How much caffeine have you had in the last hour? ”

“   I'll be honest they wouldn't be so bad if they didn't speak. ”

“   Is this goof meant to be dead or what? ”

“   I am a witch. ”

“   This one reeks of self confidence when he clearly doesn't think before opening his mouth. ”

“  I call bullshit on that rule! ”

“   The point is I have a cane and I’m not afraid to use it. ”

“   If you slap me, I’ll cane you. ”

“   Yippee for women. ”

“   FUCK THE PATRIARCHY ”

“   Sorry for being British. ”

“   Oi who's playing that ominous music? ”

“   I'm strong because I eat carrots. Oh wait or is that to see in the dark.... it's for something. ”

“   I will say sorry when i'm caught, don't you worry. ”

“   AND YOU CALLED ME UP AGAIN JUST TO BREAK ME LIKE A PROMISE! ”

“   ... He's done for. Broken beyond repair. Someone play Taylor Swift. ”

“   Please refrain from punching one another. ”

“   He is becoming one with the spider I believe. ”

“   If anybody asks I will say I made you, then you will not get in trouble! ”

“   Can I be a girlboss too? I am not rude to women and I do what i like ”

“   Yippee for patriotism! ”

“   … i could make you guys rat costumes ”

“   Do you think if we started stealing bread we would lose our jobs? ”

“   why do British people ”

“   … you all need therapy. ”

“   Do you ever feel if you breathe the wrong way he will bite you? ”

“   I actively avoid whatever this is. ”

“   CARRY ME. ”

“   What if, and hear me out, they both promise not to do it again? ”

“   I wanna steal all his socks. ”

“   My socks were stolen! ”

“   Hey, watch it now. Only I'm allowed to insult me. ”

“   You couldn’t whisper to save your life. It’s pitiful. ”

“   Both of you are insufferable. ”

“   The law is overrated. ”

“   I’m afraid. Miss, you aren’t my type. ”

“   No. I swear on my life. I am being a gentleman ”

“   I support women’s wrongs. ”

“   ONE FOR ALL AND ALL FOR ONE!!! ”

“   GET YOUR ASS BACK HERE RIGHT NOW ”

“   He bites? Are you .. joking? Please say you're joking. ”

“   If you like piña coladas and getting caught in the rain ifyou're not into yoga if you have half a brain if you like makin' love at midnight in the dunes on the cape then I'm the love that you've looked for write to me and escape 🎶🎶 ”

[bradshawsbitch]

difficult | bradley bradshaw x f!reader

description: absolute filth. like smut to the highest degree, absolute debauchery. pwp. 18+ only. if you press read more you are agreeing that you are over 18 years of age. minors dni!!!

warnings: brief (very brief) mentions of sadness/angst in the beginning, afab!reader, p in v sex, unprotected sex, choking, spanking, daddy kink, praising, mentions of tears, oral (m and f receiving and giving), fingering, mentions of matrimony (you never know) -- uhhh quite the extensive list but i don't think i've missed anything.

word count: 3.2K.

disclaimer: i haven't written smut in about 10 years, so please go easy on me but yeah! tell me what you think&lt;3

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It was sometimes difficult, coming down from the highs of finally having him in your arms again. Finally feeling as if you could breathe again, tears rolling endlessly down smiling cheeks. Wanting to be so, so close. Wanting to feel his chest rise and fall against yours, wanting to feel the hot breath that escaped his parted lips. Wanting to feel him alive. Wanting him near you, in you, around you. Wanting him when he was exhausted, physically and mentally. After a few times experiencing the feeling, you figured out a way that seemed to work to bring him back to you. 

When Bradley returned from deployment, or a mission, you would still overwhelm him with hugs, kisses and tears (because that you couldn’t quite seem to stop), uttering his name over and over again like a prayer against his warm skin. His name ghosting over his own lips, his cheeks, his neck - grounding him. Bradley. Sometimes you ordered food if you happened to have a long day before Rooster made it home, but you usually tried to make him something to eat. You knew he’d be exhausted, so most of the times you made him eat, helped him shower (not that he needed much help, but you liked joining him - washing his hair, running your fingers through it, massaging his stiff shoulders), and then ushered him into bed, where you usually put on a light-hearted film that could buzz in the background as you held him. 

Sometimes he’d cry, uncontrollably, in your arms. His face buried in your neck as he clung to you. Those times you usually had tears silently streaming down your cheeks as you held him tight in your arms, rocking him softly, placing kisses on the top of his head. Other times he’d just lie with you, as you played with his hair. He’d usually fall asleep very quick if you ran your fingers softly through his hair, as you reassured him you’d be there when he woke up. His arms would be wound around you tightly, legs intertwined, with his head resting on your shoulder or on your chest.

If you were lucky enough to have some days off after Bradley came back, you’d make sure to observe his actions and general emotional state. He’d usually be a bit quiet and drawn into himself if it had been a difficult time, needing a few days to process before your Rooster came back. During these days you made sure to call him Bradley, or sweet pet-names, knowing he might’ve heard ‘Rooster’ said in various tones of distress or panic at work. Depending on what kind of mission or deployment he’d been on, he needed different things from you. Sometimes you noticed he wanted to have some time for himself, and other times he needed you close.

This time though, something seemed different. You did your usual routine on his first day home, but the days following that Bradley seemed conflicted if he wanted you close or if he needed space. He seemed agitated, which made you think he needed some time to himself. But on the other hand, the stars had aligned perfectly and you had a few days off work to enjoy Bradley, and you were yearning for him. 

Two days after Bradley came home, you wake up in a cold and empty bed. Quickly grabbing a discarded shirt of his from the floor, you gingerly walk out of your shared bedroom, walking downstairs. Bradley is sat on the sofa scrolling through his phone, wearing only sweatpants.

“Hey,” it’s a whisper, but it cracks through the silent room like a whip. Bradley looks up, the corner of his lip quirking upward at the sight of you wearing his shirt. 

“I couldn’t sleep,” he mumbled apologetically. Wrapping your arms around your midsection, you can’t help the shivers and goosebumps that arises on your arms from the cold of the living room. Walking forward, you move to straddle Bradley’s lap, and he puts his phone down to the side of him to help you scoot closer to him.

“Talk to me,” you whisper, brows furrowed with worry as your fingers card through his locks, tugging here and there as you know he likes it. A soft groan that comes from deep within his chest let’s you know he appreciates it.

“Tell me what you need…” you beg, searching his eyes, trying to find what is bothering him. Does he not want you anymore? His large hands has settled on your t-shirt covered hips, his head leaned back against the headrest to look up at you. 

“I need you,” he replies simply, and you furrow your brows. It hadn’t seemed that way. 

“I’m here, love. I’ve been trying to figure out how to get you back to me,” you mumble, looking down. His fingers swiftly finds your chin, slowly raising it so you’re looking at him again. 

“I’m sorry, sweetheart. I should’ve told you everything’s alright… I just didn’t want to talk about it right now,” Bradley explained - ‘it’ being his feelings about his last detail. His arms wound around your waist, pulling you closer to his chest. One hand finds it’s way up your back and into your hair, massaging the back of your head. It makes you moan softly as you lean your head back into his hand. 

“Mm, that feels so good, Bradley” it’s a breathless moan, almost, and you feel his lips quirk into a smirk as they found the soft skin of your neck. He knew all your weaknesses so well. His lips dance across your skin, leaving kisses and small licks where he knows you like it. When a gasp falls from your lips, he’ll gently suck and nip at the sensitive skin, making your body warm up with pleasure. 

The hand that’s massaging your scalp soon starts gently tugging at your strands, and you can’t help but grind your hips down on Bradley, feeling him hard in his sweatpants already against your bare core. He groans softly, his other hand gripping at your hip to help you move your hips against his. 

“This is how I need you, sweetheart. Falling apart in my hands, needing me. Moaning my name,” he mutters against your skin, lips moving along your jawline and upwards, to catch your lips with his. Your hands have been idle so far, resting on Bradley’s broad chest, being too lost in your own euphoria at his touch. Now they come alive to hold his face in between them, your kisses turning desperate, needing to feel him so much closer. As the kiss deepens, and Bradley let’s a moan slip from his lips that are warm against yours, your fingers finds his curly tresses, gently tugging at them to get further access to him. 

His hands has left your hair and your hips, and they’ve now slipped under the shirt you’re wearing, ghosting over the skin of your waist, his thumbs gently gracing the underside of your tits. They move softly and slowly over their sensitive skin, before they grace your nipples teasingly. 

“Bradley,” you moan “more, please” he sighs heavenly at the sound of his name rolling off of your tongue, and he lets his hands cover your breasts as he massages them, playing with your nipples as you moan for him. Reaching down, you grab a hold of the hem of your shirt, raising your arms to discard it.

“Beautiful,” Bradley breathes as his lips instantly latches on to your nipple, sucking and licking it as if he would never taste your skin again. Pressing your chest further against his face your soft mewl of approval seems to spur him on, your hands tugging more harshly at his hair now, wanting to keep him close as he plays with your tits. Moving your hips, you grind down to his hard length, your wet core dragging against his sweatpants, creating delicious friction. You can feel how hard and warm he is, and you want him in you so bad. 

“Brad… please, I need you so bad!” You whimper, grinding down hard on his cock. Rooster groans at the sound of your plea, and he lets go of your nipple to look up at you. He tuts softly and shakes his head.

“Are you going to be a good girl for me?” His voice is low, domineering and you let out a whine before nodding, trying to get more friction against him as you wriggle around on top of him. 

“You know what I need to hear, sweet girl,” he smirks and you let out a noise of complaint. 

“Yes, sir!” You rush out, pouting. 

“Good girl” he praises in that low, seductive voice of his, it sends a shiver down your spine and you can feel yourself clench around nothing. 

In a flash, he’s placed his hands on your bare ass, lifting you and placing you on your back on the sofa, legs wrapped around his waist as he hovers above you. He kisses your neck, collarbones and chest, once again wetting your nipples before leaving them to harden considerably in the cool air as he makes his way downwards. 

“Fuck I’ve missed you and your wet cunt,” Bradley groans as he spreads your legs further apart, taking in your wetness before letting his tongue swirl around your clit. A strangled gasp is wrenched from your throat at the sudden feeling, and your hands fly down to rest on Bradley’s head. He smirks before letting his tongue fuck in to you, his nose and moustache gracing your clit every so often, making you whimper and moan uncontrollably, using your hand to push his face closer to your core.

Looking down, you see Rooster shake his head slightly, burying himself deeper in you as his hips rocks slowly into the cushions of the sofa, making himself feel good as he pleasures you. The sight, and Roosters tongue fucking deep in to you is enough to make a long moan roll from your lips as you cum hard on his face. He replaces his tongue with his fingers, fucking lazily in to your soaking wet core, his thumb gracing your clit as he softly says 

“Good girl, so pretty when you cum on my face, yeah?” You can only nod, too high on your orgasm to truly take in his praise. 

“Please, Bradley,”

“Please what, sweet girl?” He hums, kissing the skin on your hip.

“Want to suck you off,” you mumble, looking into his lust filled eyes. At that, he groans, closing his eyes. 

“Fuck, sweet girl. You want my cock deep in your throat?” Biting your lip, your thighs clenching together, you nod quickly as a small whimper makes it way out of you. 

“Get on your knees.” He commands, throwing a cushion down on the floor below the sofa. If he hadn’t driven you stupid with lust, you’d appreciate the gesture. You obey, getting on your knees on the cushion he laid down for you, looking up at him expectantly, your hands on your thighs as you sat back on the heels of your feet - just like you knew he liked it. 

“Fuck, sweetheart… so submissive for me. Looking so sweet, baby,” he cooed, his hand grabbing your chin, his thumb stroking your jaw. You smiled softly before you licked your lips slowly. You watched as Bradley swallowed hard, his thumb moving to caress your lower lip. Your lips parted automatically, breathing hard against his touch. A moan made it’s way out of Bradley’s mouth as he sank his finger in to your mouth, watching your cheeks hollow as you sucked at him, keeping your eyes fixed on his as he pumped his throbbing cock with his other hand. 

“I could cum from this alone” he confessed in a groan “been longing to feel your sweet mouth on my dick, baby” he continued, chest heaving as he slipped his fingers out of your mouth to gather up your hair in to a makeshift ponytail at the back of your head. 

Moving your hands, you gripped at his muscular thighs as he came closer. Opening up for him, you took his hard, warm cock into your mouth, moaning slightly around its silky feel. Slowly taking all of him in, Rooster’s broken moan at the feeling of the tip of his dick hitting the back of your throat had you whimpering around him. Fuck, he was so hot. 

“That’s it, sweet girl - you’re taking my cock so damn well, fuck—” he mumbled before tugging at your hair as he started slowly fucking your mouth. His other hand came to rest on your cheek, wanting to feel the outlines of his cock in your wet mouth, his thumb softly rubbing the skin of your cheek. 

Relaxing your throat, you breathed through your nose to be able to take him deeper, and the long moan that Rooster let out had you pressing your thighs together, your core tingling with want. 

“Can I?” Rooster breathed out, and you tapped his thigh once ‘Yes’. “Fuck!” He groaned as he started to speed up, fucking your mouth and throat in earnest now. Tears were spilling from your eyes as you gagged around his thick cock, making a mess of him as your wet mouth took him all in. Looking up at him, he nearly came as he saw your fucked out state, your teary eyes and your wet lips around his length. Slowing down, he slipped out of your mouth. Bradley picked you up from the floor with ease, embracing you as he whispered 

“What did I do to deserve such a good girl?” Stroking your hair he kisses you sweetly, a stark contrast to what he’d just been doing. But that’s what you loved about sex with Bradley. 

“Can you please fuck me now?” You whined, needing to feel him stretch you out. 

“Are you a needy little girl, hm?” Bradley chuckled, stroking your hair. You almost rolled your eyes, of fucking course you were! He’d been gone forever! (In reality it wasn’t that long, but still!) 

“Yes, daddy��� you said sarcastically. You’d never called him daddy before, never really daring to venture further than ‘Sir’ and your occasional ‘lieutenant’. You weren’t ready for Bradley turning you around, bending you over and his palm making harsh contact with your asscheek, tearing a surprised moan from your throat. 

“Call me that again” he commanded, his fingers entering you harshly from behind, pumping in and out hard. 

“Oh my g-god,” you stuttered, earning you another spank, 

“Oh god, fuck me please, daddy,” you whined, the sensation of his fingers fucking into you not enough. 

“There’s my good girl” Bradley grunted, teasing your wet folds with his cock, barely letting himself enter before pulling back and dragging his dick up and down, teasing your clit as well. Your moans were desperate now, mewls and whimpers almost turning into teary sobs. You needed him so bad. 

The tip of his cock once again entered you and you moaned loudly at the sensation, and Rooster couldn’t hold back anymore. He entered you slowly, letting you feel his throbbing hard cock stretching you until he was balls deep. He let out a relieved groan before he rocked into you, grinding his fully sheathed cock against your sweet spot, pulling out just an inch before he was back in, fucking you so slow, his thrusts lazy and deep. 

You were moaning incoherently now, ragged breaths torn from your chest as you babbled his name, along with pleads and the occasional needy whine of “daddy”. Whenever you uttered the latter, Bradley would groan and speed up slightly. You’d never had sex like this before. Bradley was amazing in bed, but often you two would get so caught up in each other and the pleasure you gained that it all went by so quickly. Here he had you bent over the sofa, cock drunk and delirious with pleasure, tears streaming down your face from the intense emotions he had evicted from you. 

“Look at you, baby - so pretty and fucked out for me” Bradley panted, still fucking into you so slow and deep.

“All for you, daddy” you whined.

“Almost wish I had a mirror to see your pretty face, darling” he murmured, his hand and arm trailing up your chest, his fingers wrapping around your throat as he lifted your upper body up to rest against his own broad chest as he fucked you from behind. The new angle had you moaning loudly, and feeling his fingers tighten against your throat had you sobbing it felt so good. 

“Daddy, please, please let me cum— I’m so fucking close daddy— oh god, you fuck me so good” you were babbling again, whimpering and moaning as Bradley started fucking you harder, his lips having latched on to your sensitive throat. 

“Cum for me, sweet girl. Cum all over daddy’s cock, baby” he murmured against your ear, and with a high pitched moan you fell apart in Bradley’s arms, seeing stars as he squeezed your throat lightly. 

Bradley fucked you through your orgasm, picking up his speed slightly as he started fucking into you harder, holding your body up with his arms as he groaned in to your ear.

“Fuck, I’m gonna fill you so good baby, gonna cum so deep in that pussy of yours” you moaned again at his words, clenching around him as he spilled his seed deep in to you in long spurts, heavy moans rolling of his lips as he came. Resting his forehead against your shoulder, he panted, kissing your warm skin before praising you softly.

“You did so good baby. It wasn’t too much?” You shook your head, a small smile playing on your lips as you raised your hand to stroke his hair. 

“I’ve missed you” you confessed, and he hummed as he slipped out of you, laying down on the sofa and dragging you down on top of his warm body. 

He was silent for a while, deep in thought before he looked you in the eye and confessed 

“I think you’re it for me.” your smile broadened.

“Really?” 

“Yeah. That’s what I’ve been thinking about since I came back. It scared me a little at first. But I can’t imagine my life without you in it.” He confessed, and you could tell he felt vulnerable. With your hand splayed on his chest, over his heart you smiled.

“I’ve known you were it for me for a while now, Rooster” you’d spoken softly. His fingers intertwined with yours, and there was a certain sparkle in his eyes as a moment of silence stretched between the two of you.

“So then you wouldn’t be opposed to maybe marrying me some day?” He asked, tentatively. You chuckled, knowing he wasn’t proposing to you know - but more seeing if that was something you wanted.

“I wouldn’t mind becoming Mrs. Bradshaw. In fact, I’d love it” you smiled warmly. 

“Was the sex so good you wanted to put a ring on it?” You continued jokingly, a mischievous glint in your eyes. Bradley let out a surprised laugh, squeezing your hand as his eyes too twinkled with mirth.

“Well, I can’t let you go after that mindblowing orgasm you just gave me!” He joked back, embracing you harder as you giggled.

There he was. “Now you’re back,” you mumbled, smiling as you rested your cheek against his chest, feeling the steady rise and fall.

“Now I’m back.”

[scekrex]

Male!reader x Adam NSFW prompt.. (I love these two..)

maybe an inexperienced reader x Adam but like it's their first time?? I think it could make some pretty good fluff too!

Oh fuck yeah that's good! I'm so fucking sorry that it took me so incredibly long to write this but! this is probably the longest thing I've ever written. Enjoy 3.3k words of smut

Let's make a mess and cross the line, you and me a masterpiece

pairing: Adam x male!reader

warnings: language, anal sex

note: not beta read bc fuck you I don't have beta readers

All those stupid instagram posts that had stated ‘No one dies a virgin, life fucks us all’ might’ve been true, yet none of these posts coudl’ve prepared you for the first sexual experience ever. Because despite the jokes the posts had been cracking, you had in fact died as a virgin and therefore you had only the slightest idea of what you were supposed to do. Good thing Adam was on the experienced side when it came to this - he had been bragging about how all of his sexual partners had always experienced an orgasm when they had been with him, how true those words were, you didn’t know, but you trusted him and his skillful mouth enough to believe his words. For now.

“Just fucking lay down and let the dickmaster do the fucking work, babes,” the brunette said and therefore gave you a task - something to work with, even if that meant to just lay down. It was something easy you could do. “Are you sure? I want you to enjoy this t-” the first man interrupted you by grabbing your jaw firmly yet soft enough to not hurt you - he wanted you to feel as comfortable as possible and scaring you by being too harsh wouldn’t help at all. “Babes,” his usually playful tone was all gone, all that you heard in his voice was seriousness, “I will, okay? Fucking lay down.” And as he spoke those words, his free hand came to first rest on your chest, then he started to press you down until your back hit the mattress. You closed your eyes, taking a deep breath as you felt the softness of the fitted sheet against your naked skin. Fuck, were you really going to do this? Yeah, yeah you were and despite having only the slightest idea on how to act, you were okay. Like you knew how this would work out - two men having sex - you weren’t stupid after all. You had seen it in porn, you had read about it in books, you knew how this would go, you knew how it worked in general, but reading about it and doing it felt worlds apart now that you were about to lose your virginity. Yet Adam seemed to notice your inner conflict and he sighed as he lifted his hand from your chest and let go of your jaw, his once firm touch turned soft as he stroked your side up and down with his left hand, sitting next to you like a god - though you knew he wasn’t, he surely lived up to the angelic status. “You need to relax,” he hummed as his golden eyes roamed over your body, watching your muscles twitch under his gaze. He looked at you like you were the only one for him, like you were all he’d ever need, all he’d ever want. He looked at you with love, love he only had for you, love he would never give to somebody else. “Otherwise it’s gonna hurt,” and while that was all he voiced out loud, you heard the unspoken ‘And I don’t wanna hurt you’ so loud and so clear inside your head that for a tiny moment, you thought he had actually said those words.

You leaned into his touch like it was the most natural thing to do and listening to his soft voice brought comfort, you wanted him to keep talking yet you didn’t ask for it, would it be too much? Too weird? You didn’t know, all you knew was that you didn’t want to fuck this up. What if you overstepped by requesting too much and he would never want to have sex with you again? There were too many thoughts screaming inside your head, too many worries that took over your mind, that prevented you from relaxing because how could you relax when you had no idea what to do while Adam seemed to know it all? How were you supposed to bring pleasure to the first man when you didn’t know how? Sure, you could jerk him off but that wouldn’t be enough, would it?

The brunette watched you for a moment, watched as your muscles continued to twitch, how your body seemed so stiff, so far from relaxed and even though your eyes remained close, he could feel how unsure you were. “Y/N,” his voice was slightly louder than a whisper and if the room wouldn’t be as quiet as it was, you would’ve missed it, but oh how pretty your name sounded when it fell from his lips, he made it sound so holy, so divine. “We don’t have to fucking do anything.” That made you open your eyes, you lifted your head and looked him right in the eyes, that’s when he saw the worries that you were bottling up reflecting in your eyes. And he felt sorry for it, he felt sorry for the fact that he hasn’t got the words to offer you comfort - he has never been good with that. No one had ever comforted him so how was he supposed to know how to comfort other people? “You don’t want to?” was the first thing you asked, oh you were so scared of rejection, so afraid to not be good enough and Adam really hated the fact that he saw so much of himself inside of you. But while you were open about those feelings, he stored them deep inside, had locked them up and put on a cocky act to hide them as best as possible. Adam’s hand stopped at your waist, he grabbed a hold of it and pulled you a little closer to him, “I fucking want,” he replied quickly, assuring that he was indeed looking forward to having sex with you, “But do you?”

The question was left unanswered for a couple minutes, minutes you spent thinking. You did, that you were certain about, but you were also scared. So, so scared that you wouldn’t be good enough. “I-,” you interrupted yourself, breaking eye contact by tilting your head sideways, away from Adam. Dear God, why couldn’t you just tell him? It would make it so much easier, but you were also afraid of that because being afraid of having sex sounded so weird, so childish to your own ears - would he even understand? You didn’t know, on one hand you hoped he would on the other was Adam bragging about how good he was in bed - did he ever have any problems with having sex, has he ever felt as nervous as you were feeling? You doubted that.

The brunette waited for you to continue talking, he wanted to hear what you had to say. Though he thought he already knew, so he tried to help by voicing your feelings for you, “You’re scared.” And coming from him, it sounded so simple, like a small issue he could easily take care of. He managed to make it sound like the smallest problem in all of existence. “Yeah,” was your answer, spoken quietly, embarrassed by the fact that you were feeling the way you did. “That’s fucking okay,” was his response and even though he sounded genuine, you weren’t sure if you could believe his words. Because how could it be okay to be scared of having sex? There was not a single reason that justified your fear in the slightest bit and yet Adam acted like it was the most normal thing in the world - you really didn’t know if you hated or loved him for that. “We’re gonna take this fucking slow, babes,” the first man continued, “As fucking slow as you want.” He grabbed you by your upper arms and pulled your torso up, you were now sitting next to him again. “You’re gonna ride me,” and even though you knew he had his reasons for choosing a different position, you were even more scared of that sudden change. Now you were to do the work, after all. “That way you can pick the pace,” oh now that made a lot more sense and actually eased your worries at least a little bit. That way you had more control. “Okay.” And it seemed like it actually was okay.

The brunette got up to strip himself out of his underwear, then he sat down next to you again and you really couldn’t help but stare because how in the name of the mighty lord above was this about to fit inside of you? There was simply no way he’d fit all of it in - was that even important now? Probably not, yet to you it kinda was. Because how was this supposed to feel good for Adam when- The first man interrupted the train of thoughts that were running through your head by grabbing your chin and forcing you to look at him, “Less fucking thinking and more focusing on me, babes.” You looked him in the eyes, gave him a small nod and then started to crawl up in his lap, once seated somewhat comfortably, you tilted your head to look up to him, “So uhm, am I just gonna…?” As you spoke you carefully wrapped one hand around his dick, causing a muffled moan to fall from his lips as he watched your every move. You were about to lift yourself up by grabbing a hold of his shoulder, but he stopped you, pushing you back down again, “I’m not gonna fuck your brains out without fucking preparation.” Normally he’d snap his fingers and get to the part where his dick would get wet, but he wanted to prepare you properly, not only because it was your first time in general, but also because it was the first time for the both of you together, he wanted this to be memorable, he wanted to please you in all the right ways, show you that there was nothing to be afraid of, that this was all about pleasure.

So he wrapped his arm around your waist and lifted your body up effortlessly, his free hand found its way to your ass, he got you used to his touch first my playfully squeezing your ass cheeks, then he slowly moved his index finger towards your entrance, giving you more than enough time to mentally prepare for what was about to come, with the hand he used to hold your body up he snapped his fingers, the cool liquid that was suddenly covering your entrance and his fingers made you flinch, it had been so unexpected yet it didn’t cause you to feel uncomfortable. As his index finger started to circle your hole, he hummed, “Don’t forget to fucking breathe, don’t want ya cute ass to pass out.” And that made you smile a little, his comment made the air feel less heavy and took some of the seriousness away - how he had done it? You had no clue. And then he slowly pushed his finger past the ring of muscles and you inhaled deeply, kept the air inside of your lungs until it started to burn, then you exhaled. The brunette watched you carefully, because while he was impatient to fuck your brains out, to make you feel divine, he also wanted to go slow on you - for now. Once his entire finger found its place inside of you, Adam spoke up again, “I won’t fucking move unless you say so. Take your sweet fucking time getting used to it, babes.” And while you felt like you should get used to it as quickly as possible to not keep him waiting longer than necessary - the hard dick in your hand twitched in excitement - you also trusted his words and took them to heart.

It took you a while to get used to the new feeling, to the feeling of being filled up, because while you had done that to yourself in the past out of pure curiosity, being opened up by somebody else - let alone your partner - felt so different, so much better. So you gave him the okay to move his finger and he was eager to comply, the thrusts were soft and slow they gave you time to adjust, to get used to it. Then the tip of his second finger brushed against your entrance and you swallowed hard, you knew the second finger would bring pain, that it would start to stretch you open properly, you were also aware of the fact that the second finger wouldn’t be the last - especially not with the size of Adam’s dick. “Relax babe#s,” Adam hummed as the hand that he didn’t try to bury in your ass came up to slightly tilt your head upwards, forcing your eyes to meet his. “I’m not gonna hurt your handsome ass, got it?” and while to others his words would sound harsh, maybe even insensitive, you knew that this was the most sensitive and ensuring he could offer, he tried his best to make you feel confident about having sex for the first time and you silently thanked him by nodding at his words. You knew he would not purposely hurt you, that has never been the problem in the first place, yet you were absolutely nervous about the natural burning pain that would follow soon as his second finger slowly started to enter you. But the pain never came and when you seeked for an answer in Adam’s eyes as to why that was, the first man gave you a familiar cocky smile and a promising wink, “Told you I won’t hurt your fucking ass.” And that you had to give him, there was no pain. At all. Not when the second finger had entered you, not when the brunette decided it was time for the third finger and even the fourth finger went in effortlessly without bringing any kind of discomfort with it.

“I think,” you whispered, hands on his hips as you gently fucked yourself up and down his fingers, the feeling of being sp full was still a little strange but the longer Adam kept his fingers buried inside of you, the more used yo u got to the feeling and the easier it was for you to let loose and give up some control, to let lust and desire take over. “I think I’m ready,” your voice was quiet as you finished your sentence, a thing Adam did not like since he’d rather see you filled with confidence, but he understood - or at least he tried his best to do so. A grin met your unsure eyes, “Yeah? Think you can take the og dick like you were fucking made for it?” The way he worded it made you shiver a little, because that was exactly what you wanted, you wanted for your body to swallow your lover’s dick like God had created you to do so. And so you gave Adam a firm yet silent nod, the grin that appeared on his lips at your reaction was almost devilish, “Words, babes.” - “Yes.”

That simple word was enough for Adam to withdraw his fingers and line his dick up against your entrance, before he pushed you down onto his erection, something deep within his eyes shifted, “If it gets too fucking much, tell me. Immediately.” And as soon as he heard another, “Yes,” from you, he slowly started to push your hips down, inch by inch, taking his time. He dug his nails in the soft flesh of your waist to keep him from bottoming out, he held onto every little bit of self control he was able to find within himself, he wanted this to last. Not only that though, he also wanted you to enjoy your first time with him, he wanted you to show you all he had to offer while also making sure you got pleasure from it. So he forced himself with all the willpower his body held to go as slow as possible.

His eyes were locked onto yours, making sure that the only emotions reflecting from them were positive ones, angelic magic be blessed for taking the pain away from you. And then your ass cheeks finally pressed themselves against his hips and Adam had managed to bury himself inside of you entirely without hurting you at all. Your face was scrunched up from the pleasure and the feeling of being filled up - his dick felt so much better, so much more fitting than his fingers. Just as the brunette wanted to check in with you and make sure you were okay you started to move your hips upwards, then you sunk down again and instead of checking on you, the first man moaned out a curse and tilted his head backwards. His reaction filled you with confidence and you repeated your motion as Adam’s nails dug deeper into your soft flesh. He tried his best to hold onto the remaining self control - to no avail though. It only took him a couple seconds before he started to eagerly meet your moves halfway through. His hips made no contact with the mattress anymore, he was too needy, too eager to bury himself inside of you over and over again. Your hands held onto his shoulders in order to make it easier to push yourself up and down. “Fuck, so fucking good,” the first man mumbled as his desperate eyes seeked your confident ones, that look he liked way better on you, especially because the confidence in your eyes was clouded by desire and neediness. You needed him to fill you up just as badly as he wanted to stain your insides with his cum.

The slow yet precise movements with which it had started grew quicker and sloppier with each thrust, with each moan and cry for more. And then the tip of Adam’s dick brushed against a spot that caused you to arch your back and your mind was filled with one thought only. You wanted Adam in every way possible, wanted him to dick you down, fill you up, make you see stars. You wanted him to rail your brains out but your lips were not able to voice those desires of yours, so you simply quickened the pace of your hip movement. A loud moan of his name fell from your lips as your hips tried to quicken the pace, the brunette’s hands on your hips prevented you from doing so. While normally he would enjoy a quicker and rougher pace, for your first time with him he wanted to keep it a little softer, wanted to not fuck your ass sore. You on the other hand seemed to have other plans. As his dick continued to press against that sweet spot inside of you, your hands nails dug into Adam’s shoulders as you pushed your body up and down as forcefully as possible - which basically meant as forceful as Adam let you. “Chill the fuck out, babes, ym dick ain’t going fucking nowhere, you can fuck yourself silly on it for the rest of fucking eternity,” the brunette huffed out breathlessly as he finally loosened his grip and let you set the pace to something more rough and harder, to something quicker and sloppier. Oh and how the both of you were enjoying it, Adam getting lost in the tight heat that surrounded his dick and you losing your mind as you pushed your body up and down Adam’s dick. It felt like you were high on drugs - not that you ever really did drugs, but you imagined this would come close to smoking weed, everything the two of you did, every little movement, every noise, every breath you and Adam were taking - it all felt divine and holy. Like God had wanted it to happen right then and there.