#he's some guy with a bachelors in biochem

[bellamygate]

idk if anyone has had the balls to say it yet and im def not the one to put it eloquently as it deserves but im seeing some uneasy & alarming trends surfacing in the manifestation & self-help community that look like cult indoctrination

[hibernationsuit]

SPARE SOME LONG HAIRED TOBY LORE PLEASE,,,

JEBFBJFJFJFKF YES SIR 🫡

writing this in greentext bc i thought it's funnier + makes it essier to make my thoughts abt this coherent enough

>be toby, 17 almost 18 >leave ur home bc ur mother & stepfather r trying to control every part of ur life and making it into smth u don't like (trying to make u go to med school when u Don't Want That) >already have a bachelor's degree in biochem and remember that the Big Corporation (tm) was offering u a job (which ur parents turned down), accept the offer and move to the other side of the country bc u really need the money for master's degree. >kinda be ok with ur work. also kinda like another new employee, jack. >get into a relationship w jack. also get to know his friends and hang out with them. >friends turn out to be anti-corporate and toby is sooo into it. they're helping an independent organization write an article abt some unethical stuff the corporation is doing >weeks pass, go for ur typical morning oat vanilla latte & be greeted by said corporation's internal affairs. they ask u to watch after this group & report everything back. >refuse and leave. >two days later come to jack for the night. he goes to get u something from ur bag and instead finds a listening device. you have no idea wtf it's doing there but then realize that the internal affairs must've put it there while u were talking >try to explain everything but the internal affairs guys bust in and kill jack > get money to stay quiet and move to another city > meet an old friend and start a skincare startup

[welllpthisishappening]

Welllp These Are Books: the April 2021 Edition

I did not read Romeo and Juliet this month. I read a bunch of other books. Like, a bunch. More than one series. Because Big Bang burnout is real and grown adults missing their deadlines is a real good way to stress me out. So, I read a bunch. Good books, very bad books, books that caused limbs to flail. For positive and not-so-positive reasons. Naturally, all those reasons must be shared. Under the cut with occasionally long and rant-prone reviews, as well as spoilers. Beware of spoilers under the cut. Please keep telling me what to read, internet. My library wish list is almost comically long now.

GIVE ME ALL THE WORLD BUILDING AND SNARK AND FIGHTING! WITH MAGIC! AND SWORDS! IT’S MY FAVORITE THING IN THE WHOLE WIDE WORLD!

Shades of Magic Series by V.E. Schwab

Kell is one of the last Antari—magicians with a rare, coveted ability to travel between parallel Londons; Red, Grey, White, and, once upon a time, Black. After an exchange goes awry, Kell escapes to Grey London and runs into Delilah Bard, a cut-purse with lofty aspirations. Now perilous magic is afoot, and treachery lurks at every turn. To save all of the worlds, they'll first need to stay alive.

— Picture it, approximately twelve forty-seven am. My husband is asleep. I am reading. The second book in this series ends. And I say, right out loud, at what might now be twelve forty-eight am, HOLY SHIT IT JUST ENDED. Justin thought we were under attack. No man has ever snapped awake quicker. He was not pleased. At least not in the same way that I was about these books. Which I goddamn LOVED. Loved. The world building. The magic. The banter. Rhy and Kell’s relationship. Once more. RHY AND KELL’S RELATIONSHIP. Which I might have cared about more than the romance??? Maybe??? I cannot get over how good this world building was. I know people have quips with it, and that’s fair. I saw the “twist” coming in the first book, and I think trying to preserve that left some plot holes that are understandably frustrating. Because Lilah definitely needed depth perception to fight as well as she did. Also did Schwab really refer to her as a cross dresser in her author’s note? Yikes. She wore a dude’s jacket, like—c’mon V.E. Other than that though. I loved it. Also shout out to @peglegsjones for suggesting this one in my 2020 post and call out to me for taking so long to read it.

Six of Crows by Leigh Bardugo

Ketterdam: a bustling hub of international trade where anything can be had for the right price—and no one knows that better than criminal prodigy Kaz Brekker. Kaz is offered a chance at a deadly heist that could make him rich beyond his wildest dreams. But he can't pull it off alone. . . . A convict with a thirst for revenge. A sharpshooter who can't walk away from a wager. A runaway with a privileged past. A spy known as the Wraith. A Heartrender using her magic to survive the slums.  A thief with a gift for unlikely escapes.   Six dangerous outcasts. One impossible heist. Kaz's crew is the only thing that might stand between the world and destruction—if they don't kill each other first.

— I’ve talked about how little I cared about anything that happened in Shadow and Bone before, but I kept seeing gifs of the Crows in the Netflix show and my brain was like: huh, I could like them. So, after some help from the very helpful internet, I’m happy to report I do in fact like them. At one point, I slunk into the couch. Like that’s how overcome with emotion I was. Kaz ripped a dude’s eye out! For Inej! Matthias loved Nina’s laugh! I would like to hug Jesper. Seriously, this hit all my high points and world building and banter and I lol’ed at “scheming face.” I would like my hold to come through faster on the sequel.

THEY DID NOT CALL INTERMISSION HALFTIME AND MY COLLEGE EXPERIENCE WAS WAY DIFFERENT THAN THESE KIDS

The Off Campus Series by Elle Kennedy

Hannah Wells has finally found someone who turns her on. But while she might be confident in every other area of her life, she’s carting around a full set of baggage when it comes to sex and seduction. If she wants to get her crush’s attention, she’ll have to step out of her comfort zone and make him take notice…even if it means tutoring the annoying, childish, cocky captain of the hockey team in exchange for a pretend date. All Garrett Graham has ever wanted is to play professional hockey after graduation, but his plummeting GPA is threatening everything he’s worked so hard for. If helping a sarcastic brunette make another guy jealous will help him secure his position on the team, he’s all for it. But when one unexpected kiss leads to the wildest sex of both their lives, it doesn’t take long for Garrett to realize that pretend isn’t going to cut it. Now he just has to convince Hannah that the man she wants looks a lot like him.

— The first book in this series was free on Amazon. So, I read it. And really liked it??? It was so chock full of cliches and badly written tropes and Garrett probably should have accepted that Hannah didn’t want to go out at the start, but like—he was cute? And as we all know I am TRASH™ for stories set in the same verse, so, like, I just kept reading these trashy college hockey books. Trashy is a compliment here. God, these kids had so much sex. So much. An incredible amount, really. I once had a guy tell me he was physically attracted to me, but not emotionally attracted to me in college. Like, that was my college experience. The first and second books were the best, I think. I didn’t really like Dean that much.

MAYBE IT WAS BECAUSE HE WAS A RABBI???

The Intimacy Experiement by Rosie Danan

Naomi Grant has built her life around going against the grain. After the sex-positive start-up she cofounded becomes an international sensation, she wants to extend her educational platform to live lecturing. Unfortunately, despite her long list of qualifications, higher ed won't hire her. Ethan Cohen has recently received two honors: LA Mag nominated him as one of the city's hottest bachelors and he became rabbi of his own synagogue. Low on both funds and congregants, the executive board of Ethan's new shul hired him with the hopes that his nontraditional background will attract more millennials to the faith. They've given him three months to turn things around or else they'll close the doors of his synagogue for good. Naomi and Ethan join forces to host a buzzy seminar series on Modern Intimacy, the perfect solution to their problems--until they discover a new one--their growing attraction to each other. They've built the syllabus for love's latest experiment, but neither of them expected they'd be the ones putting it to the test.

— Ok, I know that sounds bad. Again, I’m a creature of predictable habit and this was the sequel to The Roommate, which I absolutely LOVED last year. But where as the relationship in that one was kind of swoony, this one was...I don’t know, really. Everyone was a well-rounded character and the plot was good, but there was this semi-invisible something that made it difficult for me to get fully on board with the whole story. Honestly, it might be because he was a religious figure?? Also, they got together real quick. Like zero to sixty in twenty-six seconds flat.

I KNOW IT’S BAD, IT WAS BAD AND YET—I CANNOT STOP READING IT???

Too Wild to Tame by Tessa Bailey

Sometimes you just can't resist playing with fire . . . By day, Aaron Clarkson suits up, shakes hands, and acts the perfect gentleman. But at night, behind bedroom doors, the tie comes off and the real Aaron comes out to play. Mixing business with pleasure got him fired, so Aaron knows that if he wants to work for the country's most powerful senator, he'll have to keep his eye on the prize. That's easier said than done when he meets the senator's daughter, who's wild, gorgeous, and 100 percent trouble. Grace Pendleton is the black sheep of her conservative family. Yet while Aaron's presence reminds her of a past she'd rather forget, something in his eyes keeps drawing her in. Maybe it's the way his voice turns her molten. Or maybe it's because deep down inside, the ultra-smooth, polished Aaron Clarkson might be more than even Grace can handle . . .

— Last month I read the first book in this series and it was absolutely ridiculous. This one even more so. The Clarksons are still on the road trip (sans one sibling because she fell in love in a week in the first book) and Aaron was, like, not a root’able character? Very Edward Cullen I’M A BAD GUY, BELLA vibes and his relationship with Grace was so strange. Super rushed again, obvs. Meeting in the woods is weird enough. Professing love forty-eight hours later is decidedly unbelievable. Also there was a kidnapping involved? I totally put a hold on the next book in the series.

COME UP WITH DIFFERENT TRAUMA, I DARE YOU! OR NO TRAUMA. WHAT A CONCEPT!!

The Trouble With Hating You by Sajni Patel

Liya Thakkar is a successful biochemical engineer, takeout enthusiast, and happily single woman. The moment she realizes her parents' latest dinner party is a setup with the man they want her to marry, she's out the back door in a flash. Imagine her surprise when the same guy shows up at her office a week later -- the new lawyer hired to save her struggling company. What's not surprising: he's not too thrilled to see her either after that humiliating fiasco.

Jay Shah looks good on paper...and off. Especially if you like that whole gorgeous, charming lawyer-in-a-good-suit thing. He's also infuriating. As their witty office banter turns into late-night chats, Liya starts to think he might be the one man who truly accepts her. But falling for each other means exposing their painful pasts. Will Liya keep running, or will she finally give love a real chance?

— I had such high hopes for this one. Which is on me, I guess. Because I didn’t hate this one, but it was...not great. Maybe I’m just getting old and crotchety but I am BEGGING romance writers to come up with different trauma for their female protagonists. Not every woman has to have been assaulted to rationalize their current personality. Doesn’t have to happen. Like, ok, yes it does happen. Far more than it should. But that’s an entirely different story, and I am so tired of female characters getting absolutely destroyed by their past only to have that be their defining characteristic for so much of the book. Until a nice man they were initially mean to shows up and he’s UNDERSTANDING and he CARES and it’s just, bleh. It’s bleh. Tired and predictable and I’m over it.

IN WHICH I SHOULD HAVE LOOKED AT THE COVER

Much Ado About You by Samantha Young

At thirty-three-years old Evangeline Starling’s life in Chicago is missing that special something. And when she’s passed over for promotion at work, Evie realizes she needs to make a change. Some time away to regain perspective might be just the thing. In a burst of impulsivity, she plans a holiday in a quaint English village. The holiday package comes with a temporary position at Much Ado About Books, the bookstore located beneath her rental apartment. There’s no better dream vacation for the bookish Evie, a life-long Shakespeare lover. Not only is Evie swept up in running the delightful store as soon as she arrives, she’s drawn into the lives, loves and drama of the friendly villagers. Including Roane Robson, the charismatic and sexy farmer who tempts Evie every day with his friendly flirtations. Evie is determined to keep him at bay because a holiday romance can only end in heartbreak, right? But Evie can’t deny their connection and longs to trust in her handsome farmer that their whirlwind romance could turn in to the forever kind of love.

— Ok, so I had had this book on hold for so long that I genuinely forgot about it and forgot who it was written by. Samantha Young wrote that one book that I called the worst book I had ever read. Only I did not realize that when I started reading this one. So, you see how this sets us up for disaster. Because this book was a disaster. Everyone was goddamn annoying. And whiny. Shit, everyone whined. About everything. Also, the actual writing was atrocious. I am not usually one to be like “men can’t write,” but at one point I told both @shireness-says and @optomisticgirl that this book must have been secretly written by a man because no woman writing it would be so obsessed with pointing out where her cellulite was. Like, what??? Also the first sex scene? Oh my God, I laughed. Guffawed. The so-called love interest literally asked: “Are we going to have sex now?” And then they just did. It was so bad. Also there was a dog? Who went everywhere with the so-called love interest. And they just never explained that? I thought it was going to be part of some crushing and depressing backstory. Nah, he was just there.

HOLY SHIT THIS WAS SO DUMB I CANNOT BELIEVE THIS WAS A BOOK! A BOOK MEANT FOR YOUNG ADULTS! WHAT IS YOUNG ADULT???

The Queen’s Secret by Melissa de la Cruz

Lilac's birthright makes her the Queen of Renovia, and a forced marriage made her the Queen of Montrice. But being a ruler does not mean making the rules. For Lilac, taking the throne means giving up the opportunity to be with love of her life, the kingdom's assassin, Caledon Holt. Worse, Cale is forced to leave the castle when a horrific set of magical attacks threatens Lilac's sovereignty. Now Cal eand Lilac will have to battle dark forces separately, even though being together is the only thing that's ever saved them.

— Remember last month when I was like: can’t wait for my hold to come through on this sequel so I know what happens? What an idiot. THIS BOOK WAS SO DUMB I CANNOT BELIEVE IT WAS A BOOK. As always in my rage-induced rants, no apologies for spoilers because seriously do NOT read this, but Lilac (legit, that was her name) married some other dude but just kept fucking Cale??? Like she had a secret door? So he could come in and they could fuck?? I just—oh my God. So, all these things kept happening. Magic and bad stuff and horses were killed. Lilac’s mother was the absolute WORST. Honestly the most worthless character who at one point was like “well, my story is over, guess it’s time to leave,” and then just left?? Forced Lilac into a marriage of alliance and no love and then everything evil was defeated in point two four seconds. It happened so fast I wasn’t even sure it happened. So, then I’m like, ok, how are Lilac and Cale going to end up together? Because this is YA and that’s how it’s supposed to work. Only her being married and that marriage requiring an heir is something of a rather large hurdle. Don’t worry! Remember when Lilac and Cale were fucking? Everyone totally knew. Including the king Lilac is married to. Who is somehow like...ok with this? And tells Cale that Lilac is pregnant. ISN’T THAT WONDERFUL! Sure, because now they can lie and claim its the king’s heir. ONLY IT’S CALE’S KID! AND CALE IS COOL WITH THIS! His entire internal monologue during this is about how he realizes he might not ever be able to tell his kid he’s their father, but he’ll be around and that’s good. Wait, what??? But there’s more! Not only is Lilac having Cale’s kid, but the king she’s married to is in love with one of Cale’s spy associates. So the king and the spy are going to go hang out (and presumably have their own kids) at one castle and Lilac and Cale are going to go to another. Lilac and the king never get divorced or annulled or whatever. Everyone stays as is and married as is and—they all live happily ever after? This was presented as a good ending, I swear. What the shit, guys, seriously.

[sirfrogsworth]

Hey there @politicsaccordingtohistory

Would you like to play a game?

It’s called...

MEET THAT SCIENTIST!

*game show music plays*

Mr. PATH seems to think all of the newly elected Democrats with science backgrounds are bumbling fools who can’t tell a beaker from a test tube. 

Let’s see what kind of mental neanderthals got elected, shall we?

Jeff Van Drew

This one might be a bit controversial. Jeff is a doctor of dentistry. Which is technically an applied science, but some might argue that is not in the spirit of the original tweet. Though a dentist must have the ability to understand medical research, diagnose certain medical conditions, and has a better than average understanding of human biology.

That said, he is apparently a pretty damn good dentist as he is president of the New Jersey Dental Society and a board expert of the New Jersey Board of Dentistry. 

Lauren Underwood

Lauren is a registered nurse. I bet you’re imagining some woman in scrubs taking people’s temperature and bringing them Jello. Not very impressive, right?

Lauren earned her Bachelor of Science in Nursing from the University of Michigan. She received her Master of Science in Nursing and Master of Public Health from Johns Hopkins University. 

That’s two masters degrees, friend. 

From Johns Frickin’ Hopkins.

Lauren went on to be the Senior Director of Strategy & Regulatory Affairs at Next Level Health. She also served as an adjunct instructor at the Georgetown University School of Nursing & Health Studies. 

George Frickin’ Town.

In 2016, Obama appointed her as a Senior Advisor at the Department of Health and Human Services where she helped shape national health policy.

So yeah... just a nurse. 

Jacky Rosen

Jacky is a computer scientist. She is an accomplished programmer and software developer. She earned a bachelor's degree in psychology (BONUS SCIENCE!) and an associate degree in computing and information technology. She has worked with some of the biggest companies in Nevada including Summa Corporation, Citibank, and Southwest Gas Company.

She dabbles in other sciences in her spare time. Rosen led a team that constructed one of the largest solar projects in the City of Henderson and southern Nevada. Rosen helped cut a synagogue’s energy bills by 70%.

Kim Schrier 

Kim is a pediatrician! 

Now we’re talking. Things are getting real sciency now.  

Dr. Schrier earned a bachelor's degree from the University of California, Berkeley, in astrophysics. (MORE BONUS SCIENCE!)

She attended the University of California Davis School of Medicine, where she graduated a Doctor of Medicine. She completed her residency at the Stanford University School of Medicine. 

Stan Frickin’ Ford. 

Say Mr. PATH, do you think they accept shitty doctors into the residency program of one of the most prestigious medical programs in the country? 

Asking for a friend.

Elaine Luria

Elaine was just a lowly nuclear engineer. 

For the Navy. 

Where she operated nuclear reactors on giant ships. 

Like this one.

With reactors like this one. 

That doesn’t look very complicated. Just shove uranium in the hole and press a button probably. 

She eventually reached the rank of Commander where she led Assault Craft Unit TWO. A fleet of vessels specializing in getting to places super fast that are far away. They can be on the go within 24 hours. 

I’m guessing that’s not a job that needs a competent commander or anything. The Navy probably just puts any rube in charge. 

Sean Casten

Next up we have probably the dumbest science guy in the bunch. This guy seems like a real dud in a lab coat. 

Casten earned a bachelor of arts in molecular biology and biochemistry from Middlebury College. He worked as a scientist at the Tufts University School of Medicine in a laboratory investigating dietary impacts on colon and breast cancer. He earned a Master of Engineering Management and a Master of Science in biochemical engineering from the Thayer School of Engineering at Dartmouth College. 

Dart Frickin’ Mouth. 

While at Dartmouth, he worked to develop technologies for alternative heat and power generation technologies including the production of fuel grade ethanol. 

After he was done slacking earning only 3 degrees in bio-whatever, he went on to be the CEO of his own renewable energy company, Recycled Energy Development. 

They have been able to invest over a billion dollars into alternative energy technologies that might help save the planet. 

SOUNDS PRETTY DUMB.

Joe Cunningham 

Joe graduated from Florida Atlantic University as an ocean engineer. 

Florida Frickin’ Atlantic University.

Okay, I’ve never heard of that school. 

But I’m sure the ocean engineering program is very nice. 

After graduating he worked for 5 years as a consultant for a major company that specializes in marine, environmental, and coastal engineering.

Joe then went back to school to get his law degree. Which means he has a science background and a decent understanding of the laws he will be trying to change and improve. 

Chrissy Houlahan

I bet this next one is a really sucky scientist. 

This is where I prove you right, Mr. PATH. I can feel it. I mean, Chrissy? That doesn’t sound like the name of a competent scientist. 

Chrissy got her Bachelor's Degree in Engineering from Stanford University. 

Meh... now that I think about it... Stanford is overrated.  

She then earned a Masters Degree in Technology and Policy from something called the Massachusetts Institute of Technology. 

Massachusetts Institute of Technology? What the heck is that?

Pssh, it’s not like she went to M.I.T. or something. 

Now THAT would have been frickin’ impressive. 

Chrissy also spent 3 years in something called the “U.S. Air Force.” She was a project manager in charge of air and space defense technologies. 

That sounds fake. 

Heh, maybe she’ll build lasers for some fictional space force with a stupid name only a 4-year-old would think is cool.  

Chrissy also-also did voluntary community service working with girls and women in science, technology, engineering, and math. 

What’s the point, amirite? That guy from Google said women’s brains no work good at math, so her volunteer work was probably a waste of time. 

WHAT BUNCH OF MORONS.

You made fun of a liberal science journal called Fat Studies. You also implied that everyone on the left got together and collectively started it. Which... okay... sure... it was discussed at the meeting. We all contribute to and support Fat Studies. Every single one of us. 

Yes, they did get duped into publishing a fake research paper and I’m sure that’s why you mentioned it. But their editorial board still has 18 people with PhDs. I read a few articles and while I wouldn’t say it is the most esteemed journal in the world, it does push forward conversations about fat acceptance and references some genuine research that has been peer reviewed. They basically want fat people to be more respected. HOW DARE THEY?

It’s definitely a mixed bag with a left-leaning bias. Perhaps it would be better if they took a more objective approach. But I can see how you might think they don’t live up to your strict scientific standards. 

However, do you think the Republican leadership is up to your standards? 

Do you remember when Senator Jim Inhofe brought a snowball into the Senate chamber to disprove global warming?

Fat Studies has a very small readership and minimal influence. No one voted for them. They are an easy example for you to cherry pick and laugh at. 

But Ol’ Jim here is a US Senator. He can change all of our lives. This guy brought a snowball inside and in front of the entire world said global warming can’t be real cuz it was cold that day.

Do you feel like that would hold up to scientific scrutiny? 

Let's look at some more Republicans!

Donald J. Trump

This one is too easy. But he did just say this...

“One of the problems that a lot of people like myself ― we have very high levels of intelligence, but we’re not necessarily such believers. You look at our air and our water, and it’s right now at a record clean. As to whether or not it’s man-made and whether or not the effects that you’re talking about are there, I don’t see it — not nearly like it is.”

I guess he didn’t read that 1700 page climate study just released that said the opposite of that. Also, 60 percent of Americans live in areas where air pollution has reached unhealthy levels that can make people sick. SO CLEAN!

Ben Carson

Not only is Ben a prominent Republican figure and the current Secretary of Housing and Urban Development, but he is also a neurosurgeon and Yale graduate. He has got to be the best representative of a more science-minded Republican. Let’s find out!

“How are flowers able to reproduce? Pollination. How does pollination occur? Bees and other creatures. And according to evolution, plants came along before the bees. So, how did the plants reproduce?“

CHECKMATE, DARWIN!

He also believes the Earth was created in 6 days. Humans have only been around for 6,000 years. The Big Bang is stupid. The pyramids were built to store grain. And $31,000 is a reasonable amount to spend on a dining room set.

Steve King

Steve just got elected in the midterms. He’s the guy that partied with some white supremacists in Austria. He went to college and majored in math and science. Nice!

But he dropped out... less nice.

He still has some interesting thoughts on science.

"Climate change is more a religion than a science. Everything that might result from a warmer planet is always bad. There will be more photosynthesis going on if the Earth gets warmer. We don't know where sea level is even, let alone be able to say that it's going to come up an inch globally because some polar ice caps might melt because there's CO2 suspended in the atmosphere.”

WHERE IS THE SEA LEVEL? WE JUST DON’T KNOW.

It’s not like we have satellites that have been able to measure the sea level with unprecedented accuracy (within millimeters) since 1992. 

Let’s look at some members of the House Science Committee.

That might be a fairer comparison, right? It’s got “science” right in the name!

Paul Broun

He was probably the only Republican STEM scientist in Congress before he retired. He is a physician who earned a bachelor's in chemistry. 

Let’s hear him do a science. 

“God's word is true. I've come to understand that. All that stuff I was taught about evolution and embryology and Big Bang theory, all that is lies straight from the pit of hell.”

Yikes. 

Frank Lucas

“Sound science must be the cornerstone of sound policy.”

Hey! That sounds promising!

“Most telling of the EPA's irrational regulatory approach is how the EPA has concluded that the breath that we exhale, the gas that livestock expels, are dangerous pollutants and should be regulated by the Clean Air Act.“

Yeah! How could CO2 and methane possibly be problematic? It’s perfectly natural! We breathe it. Cows blow it out their pooper. So safe.

What we really need to regulate is Dihydrogen Monoxide. Everyone who has ever ingested DHMO has died. Technically. 

Dana Rohrabacher 

He chaired the House Science Committee for a while and is still an active member. I’m sure he has some deep thoughts on scientific matters. 

“We don’t know what those other cycles were caused by in the past. Could be dinosaur flatulence, you know, or who knows?”

I wonder if he has published that hypothesis in a scientific journal.

This isn’t going well. 

What we really need is a science enthusiast. Someone who has shown a true fascination and interest in things like space, rocketry, and defense technology. 

Someone like that would totally be a fair comparison. 

Mo Brooks  

Mo just got reelected and he is constantly talking about what a strong advocate he is for science. 

Let’s check him out! 

Mo Brooks is a longtime member of several scientific committees. 

Committee on Science, Space & Technology Subcommittee on Energy Vice Chairman - Subcommittee on Space and Aeronautics (aka NASA)  

Wow! He’s partly responsible for a lot of our nation’s science junk. PERFECT!

One of Mo’s favorite pastimes is going someplace sciency, wearing a lab coat, and smiling at stuff he doesn’t understand. 

“Hey fellas! Can I press some buttons? I love pressing the buttons.”

“Is this a science? Mo don’t know.”

“I bet this makes some tasty kettle corn.”

“He let me push the button! SO HAPPY!”

Since Mo is on the committee that helps direct NASA and its funding, you’d think he’d be up to speed on the latest climate science. After all, NASA is one of the world’s leading climate science researchers. 

Here’s a hot take from Mo...

“Nobody knows whether we're going to have global cooling or global warming over the next half century or century."

Actually, NASA has an entire website called “How do we know?” 

It’s got colorful graphs like this one. 

It even has this giant quote in big bold letters that Mo could see even without his reading spectacles. 

I feel like Chairman Mo should put on his lab coat and read that website. I’m sure his grandkids can pull that up for him. 

What else you got, Mo?

“What about erosion? Every time you have that soil or rock, whatever it is, that is deposited into the seas, that forces the sea levels to rise because now you've got less space in those oceans because the bottom is moving up.”

You read that correctly...  Mo thinks rocks falling into the ocean are causing the sea levels to rise instead of ice melting from global warming. 

Would you like to know just how dumb that statement is?

3,000,000,000,000,000 kilograms of rocks would need to fall into the ocean every year. The Cliffs of Dover dumped an estimated 45,000,000 kilograms of chalk into the sea after a sudden collapse. Avalanches like that would have to happen 66 million times every year.

What'chu talkin' 'bout Mo?

You may think I cherry-picked these people to make Republicans look worse. I actually could not find anyone in the leadership with a decent science literacy track record. And many of these people are in charge of our nation’s science policy. (Unlike Fat Studies.) So that is especially relevant.

I guess what I’m saying is... I’d take a mediocre Democrat scientist over Mo anytime. 

But it seems like the ones just elected are actually pretty exceptional. 

Even the dentist. 

[svrpcntined]

*cody ko vc* what is uP my guys we have three motherfuCKERS in the back of this car and one of them is this chaotic bisexual mickey jcndlskjf . i have stevie and lincoln’s coming up soon so pls bear with me bc im stuck at work and Suffering. but yeah pls like this to give me validation jsfkn also if u wanna plot and i’ll slide into ur dm’s

( joe keery, cismale, he/him ) ↷ hey, that’s MICHAEL “MICKEY” VALESKA who’s originally from BOSTON, MASSACHUSETTS. i heard they’re TWENTY-FIVE and have been working on the ship as a COMEDIAN AT THE SHOW LOUNGE for A YEAR AND A HALF. other passengers seem to say they’re IMPATIENT and PASSIVE, but are also known to be CHARISMATIC and GREGARIOUS. when they’re missing home, i heard MORNING RUNS & THE SMELL OF OLD BOOKS can always cheer them up. ↷

statistics: 

full name: michael luca valeska / nicknames: mickey / birthday: november 12th / sexuality: bisexual / birthplace: boston, massachusetts / spoken languages: english & italian / hogwarts house: gryffindor

some tidbits of info:

so ya garbage boi is a bostonian through and through ,, born and raised there for nearly all his life and he doesn’t mind bc it was pretty chill of a place, loved the historical aspect of the city and there was usually almost always something to do ,, def still has an accent but only becomes more pronounced when he’s angry or passionately speaking then

he was always a hyperactive type of child which tbh made his parents nearly rip their hair out since they were a v proper and high society kind of family ?? his dad ( franklin ) was a cardiovascular surgeon who made that coin and married his college sweetheart ( or u know ,. as they tell mickey ) after graduation where she(valentina ) went on to fashion design and she has her own line that’s gaining traction in the fashion world

for as much as mickey deals with his parents nagging ,, he absolutely adores his mom ?? just a v petite and tiny italian woman who immigrated to america when she was in high school and immediately caught the eye of mickey’s dad and it was a whirlwind romance that was kinda more of a fling but then valentina became pregnant with mickey’s older brother so then he had to put a ring on it

so mickey is v fluent in italian bc his mom speaks it around the house raised him on it as a second language and for as much as he rags on his family sometimes and in his comedy skits, he would 10/10 die for his mom and she’s v soft for him as well and lowkey her fave son fjdslkjd but don’t tell the other valeska siblings

absolutely hates the name michael and v much prefers the nickname of mickey so naturally his dad just calls him michael all the time dnSLJKf mainly reserved for when he fucks up but also that’s just his dad so pls spare his heart and just call him mickey

but yeah mickey always had pent of energy that he released in creative formats like drawing and reading or just u know ,, running around which helped when he did track and soccer in high school and was actually p good at it ??

which kind of made him popular and he thrived off the attention ?? but was also the class clown of his grade and genuinely just loved making people happy and laugh ,, doesn’t like it when ppl don’t like him bc it just gives him anxiety that someone he made someone doesn’t like him jfdsk def a people pleaser so he tends not to read any reviews written about his comedy skits at the show lounge

mickey did above average when he was in school and def got good grades but he never really knew what he wanted to do with his life and bc his older brother followed in his dad’s footsteps of med school mickey was super !!!on edge about life and just having numerous existential crises a week so 0/10 not a fun time

his dad was really pitching for mickey to follow in his footsteps and his brother’s and mickey was like lmAO responsibility in choosing and shaping my future for years to come ?? no thx ,, bUT bc he is a people pleaser ya boi got accepted in the fam alma mater of harvard .. don’t get me wrong mickey had nice grades but his last name and family history of harvard grads kinda solidified his spot there so mickey went with crossed fingers and high level anxiety into his bachelor’s degree for biochem

as u can tell since um .. he’s on the cruise ship things didn’t go that well fjhsdkj thOUGH ya boi did secure the degree in biochem running on caffeine, anxiety and the determination of elle woods ( mainly to make his mom proud ) and then the idea of med school freaked him out and he told his parents he was taking a year off just to rejuvenate himself bc lmao college sucks y’all

mickey’s mom ( ever the angel that she is ) was v understanding and just let mickey work at her design studio for some modeling of her mens collection and deal with some interning responsibilities that he was chill with bc he got paid and it wasn’t all that hard ,, his dad was not as happy and just has a perpetual frown whenever he’s around mickey bc he think mickey is just slacking off since his older brother is dealing with med school just fine

he took up improv classes just bc he loved making ppl laugh and figured it would be a good way to fill up his time and started doing some stand up without telling his dad kdjfslfk so when his year was running dry he kind of just impulsively looked into horizon and sent in his resume for a comedian position

bc i’m trash his humor is essentially john mulaney ( example HERE ,, mainly bc this skit is my fave #dontjudgeme ) and just v self deprecating and humorous retellings of life stories and smart klfdgajfk ,, he has n*ce delivery which he has his improv classes to thank

soOOO his dad is v pissed while his mom is supporting him since he told her before he left djflsk so he’s been on horizon for a year and a half and loving it ?? doesn’t really know when he’ll leave but who knows

def v charismatic and loves talking to people and meeting new ppl ,, can be a bit of a Hoe so don’t judge him he means well ok !! will stay in the morning and bring breakfast bc he may be a Masshole but he ain’t an asshole ,, def the saying of “here for a good time not a long time”

bc i suck at timelines and whatnot , mickey dipped off the boat for a bit after meeting his now bf fox where they lived together and settled down and he’s gross and in love and sappy so we out here and bc fox came back to the ship so mickey decided why nOT so he’s here being a garbage bin comedian again asfjdk

[barbecuedphoenix]

I would like to see a AU with the Eldarya guys in a police station (pleeeease, give me a police officer Valkyon!)

Hang on… the Guard of El is not a medieval police station? Whatabout those underground cells? And Miiko and Leiftan’s good-cop-bad-cop-add-Jamonroutine? o_o  

Oh, all right. Let’s assume theGuard of El has been given badges, handguns, and sirens they can stick on topof their car to tell traffic on the road to clear out. Are they going to be anymore efficient?

… …Why am I even asking…? -_-

Nevra, the Detective

The star of the El Police Department’sinvestigative division: the high-flying lead detective with the unerring nose whonever works in anything but dashing black. (Hey, being a plainclothes officer meanshe can actually dress the way he likes on the job. And despite what colleaguesmight say, he does need the sablecashmere scarf, the tight black trench coat, and the designer leather ankle-boots because… it gets cold in the city and he’s not going to miss a day ofwork because of the flu.)

Anyway. Nevra will be happyto confirm that 1.) he does have a veryacute sense of smell, and 2.) he has neverfailed a case since joining the department, even after the Oracle’s fall.Once he’s on the trail, you can bet that he’s going to unearth answers andproduce an arrest warrant for so-and-so. (Actually getting the reprobate into acell isn’t his job though.) In fact,there is no such thing as a cold casein his book; merely one that’s…. waiting patiently for more evidence. (If youtry riffling through his office, you’ll find years of ‘not-cold cases’. But don’tsay a word to anyone, or Nevra will be after your ass for ruining his image as ‘theBloodhound of El’. And for bypassing that custom lock on his office door.)     

For all his over-achievingtendencies, Nevra’s actually a popular guy in his department: charming,amiable, savvy, extremely loyal to the force, and the best man you can have foreither a night of swing dancing or a weekend football match. The only catch:think twice about inviting your girlfriend. And sometimes your boyfriend. There’sa running poll in the office on how many disgruntled exes have tried stabbinghim with a cafeteria steak knife this year. And a second poll on how many ‘damselsin distress’ that visited his office this half-year have walked away decidedly lessdamsel-like.

Also, be careful whenworking with Nevra on the field. His loyalty to the department can’t bequestioned, but there’s a reason why he works primarily with his loyal caninecompanion Shaitan (AKA the world’s most terrifying police dog). Ex-partners willwarn you that he never gives up a chase in the long run,even when outgunned and kneed where it hurts the most (and yes… they do have afew stories about that….)      

Ezarel, the Chemical Forensics Specialist  

Every department needs anegghead who can prove to the court of law that that rust-colored smear isn’tfrom a jar of strawberry preserve smashing into the wall. Or that the faintspecks of dust on a man’s coat lapels are what actually killed him, and not thebullet that was inserted into his chest a few seconds later as an afterthought.In the El Police Department, that (figurative) egghead is Ezarel. (Because hehas an honest-to-goodness ponytail that reaches to his waist. Don’t bother to tell him to get a haircut; he’ll just tell youthat he works in a lab-coat, not a suit.)  

No one really knows why thisfilthy-rich trust-fund-baby from uptown is working voluntarily in the dingy labof an inner-city police department. But if they have to guess, it’s eitherbecause he watched too many episodes of ‘NCIS’, ‘Sherlock’, and ‘The First 48’ whilegrowing up, or he’s really a mad scientist looking for a passably legal applicationfor his experiments. It’s honestly hard to tell which theory is true when talkingto him, since the man seems incapable of taking most people seriously unless they’reasking for a report. The number of smart comments that fly out of him at anyand all hours is on par with an award-winning novelist living deep in a forestcave. Or the typical biochem student. He reacts about the same way when untrainedvisitors try touching things in his lab. Including him.

Still, for all his curmudgeonlytendencies, Ezarel inspires respect from the police force for his completeindifference to rank, his thoroughness, and his generally nonlinear thinking (whichcomes in handy for reconstructing crime scenes from tiny scrapings of suspectsplatters). And he’s feared for his pranks. Department rookies are hispreferred prey (though again, office rank means little to him). Many of themhave never forgotten the night that Ezarel secretly smeared ghostly faces,handprints, and body-prints across the walls and windows of the lounge, in apeculiar type of paint that came alive only when the Halloween strobe lightswere switched on. Or that time he posed as a fresh corpse in the archives, withhis arm still caught in a file drawer and ‘bullet holes’ peppering his back,just in time for the records officer Kero to find him. (To this day, Kero stillrefuses to file any of Ezarel’s paperwork for him.) The day never gets boringif Ezarel’s in the building.        

Valkyon, the SWAT Captain

Police captain Valkyon—from thespecial response division—is one of the few full-time ballasts in the dysfunctionalpolice department. Part of it is because the man seems incapable of losing histemper. He may frown like thunder, but no one has ever witnessed him so much ascurse, even after all his years in one of the toughest divisions of the police force,that sees the highest yearly casualties from the number of riots, armedhold-ups, city terrorists, mobsters, and generally-lethal upstarts they engageon a regular basis as the frontlines of the city’s peacekeeping forces. Then again, tough talkmight be unnecessary in his case; would-be troublemakers on either side of thelaw only need to look at the span of his shoulders, or the number of pale scarscrossing his chiseled chest and back whenever he drops his shirt in thetraining room, to think hard about their projected lifespans.  

Except for his clean (andsomewhat wooden) language, Valkyon comes across as the quintessentialhardboiled officer. Colleagues know him as either a.) the by-the-book workaholicwho refuses to flinch in the face of fire (and doesn’t have much of a personallife), or b.) the dedicated bachelor who defends his privacy with deadpanremarks and genuinely doesn’t know what to do with himself during an officeparty. Besides downing a few bottles of beer in the corner. Personally, Valkyondoesn’t really see it as his fault if people mistake him as unsocial—since whendo people need to talk so much tomake themselves understood?  

Even after he downs five tosix beers, no one has ever succeeded in prying from Valkyon the story of hisdays before the police force. (And when his face shuts like a hangar door, it’sa good idea not to piss him off further.) But there’s a running theory in theoffice that not all of those famous scars and tattoos seen in the training roomcame from upholding the badge. That some might have been acquired from a lifeon the opposite side of the law. But who would think of slandering their big bronzebear of a captain that way? You don’t find many people who’ll charge a riflemanon the street with just a riot shield and his weight, coming at speed from halfa block down. Much less succeed.  

He does have a darling inthe office though. Sadly for some hopeful officers and interns, Valkyon’snon-professional eyes are trained solely on his pet mouse Floppy, who lives agenteel existence rotating between his office, his coat pocket, sometimes underhis cap, and her handmade little house inside his one-man apartment. At leastuntil the flighty thing escapes again. That’s when he starts papering thebulletin board with office-bounties for her safe return.   

Leiftan, the DistrictAttorney  

It’s one thing tochase hardened criminals through faked financial reports and pitch-dark docks,prove that three-day-old blood is in fact blood, or send a rifleman sprawlingonto the sidewalk with just a dented riot shield. But if you can’t bring themall to court and convince both judge and jury to believe what happened, thenthere will be no justice. That’s where Leiftan comes in: the so-called WhiteKnight of the El Police Department, always toting a mysterious briefcase and asoft smile that’s even more mysterious.

Although there’s along-running tradition of animosity between policeofficers/detectives/forensics specialists and anything that resembles a lawyer,the El Police Department makes an exception for Leiftan. He keeps reasonableexpectations on them and the court, does his best with what he can workon, never loses his temper when a case is thrown out or grinds to a stalemateand settlement (which happens despairingly often), and is so ceaselessly politethat it’s hard for even the dedicated grouches on the force to hate him. (Maybejust a little for how he never loses his gentleman’s polish like a normalflesh-and-blood person). But more importantly, it’s because Leiftan’sunofficial job is being their PR man whenever a case becomes high-profile enoughto hit the headlines. The public is more likely to buy an assurance that ‘dueprocedure is being followed’ and ‘several promising leads are being explored’if it comes from the gentleman-lawyer in the suit than one of them cops. Especially if they did actuallyslip up once or twice in the chase. And sometimes (i.e. often) Leiftan is the one thingstanding between them and their fire-breathing chief-of-police Miiko if ahigh-profile investigation goes awry, raising one hand politely from the sidewith a life-saving suggestion that they might be able to use acertain piece of evidence in court.  

Just because he’s thesoft-spoken type of lawyer doesn’t mean he can’t go toe-to-toe with the best ofthe officers. Over the years, Leiftan has survived many attempts by opponentsto ‘privately settle a suit’: on the street outside the court-house, at thedoor of his apartment, behind a bar, from the back of his car, or even (on onememorable occasion) on the witness stand in court. In all cases, pistol-packershave learnt the hard way that Leiftan has an aikido master’s reflexes and amean right-hand undercut. Not to mention that that reinforced briefcase—withwho knows what in it– seems as determined as he is in defying bullets.  

Jamon, the Bailiff  

Cell occupants at the policestation know Jamon as that taciturn, terrifying mass of muscle with hands thesize of dinner plates who just shoved them inside. Or if they were out-coldwhen that happened, they know him as the living pillar watching them from themain door of the detention center at the moment they woke, crunching casuallyon raw carrots that are each roughly the width of a girl’s wrist. In eithercase, the possibility of escape tends to leave them. Even if Jamon offers them carrotsthrough the bars as a healthy snack for behaving well.  

For a senior police officer,Jamon’s responsibilities are fairly light: he’s mostly tasked with watching theever-revolving population of temporary inmates in the holding cells at thestation. And to escort (and occasionally subdue) the more ornery detainees throughthe foyer, fresh from the patrol car or on their way to the court house. But intruth, it takes a very peculiar figure to turn this precarious, powder-kegposition into little more than a routine stroll through HQ, accompanied by anoccasional loud clearing of the throat when inmates get restive.  

No one’s inclined to test aseven-foot officer who prefers five-word remarks and has a grip like a parkingboot. No matter how good he is with the occasional child who visits the stationand insists on climbing onto his shoulders, or how friendly he is if you’requiet and stay at arm’s length when he opens your cell door.

Kero, the Records Officer  

The long-suffering head ofAdministration, whose primary task is to ensure that the bunker’s worth ofpaperwork in the station gets filed, stored, and used correctly. And from there…very, very slowly translated into electronic data. Make no mistake: it’s adaunting task even for a modest-sized police department, where at least half theforce despises picking up a pen (for all the other shenanigans they get into ona daily basis).

Or maybe they just love tokick at him… It’s not his fault that he dislikes pulling a gun on people, andinstead honors the tradition of muttering darkly under his breath in theirdirection. And wears glasses. It must be the glasses; who on earth says thatthey’ll make you look more respectable at work? The only one who gets moregrief at work than him is that rookie Chrome.

Needless to say, Kero spendsmost of his daily existence either instructing (for the umpteenth time) hisfellow officers in what needs to be filled out and in what order and where theyshould be deposited. (Not in his briefcase!) Or running a never-ending cycle ofproofread-return-receive-file-repeat for police records, statements, and other liabilityforms deep in the archives. Until a kind soul remembers to bring him outsidefor sunshine.       

Chrome, the Rookie  

A kid swept in from thestreets who, after the Oracle’s fall, ran odd jobs for the police in exchangefor quick cash and amnesty from the neighborhood gangs, even acting as an occasionalinformer for Nevra. Once he hit fifteen, Chrome finally applied for detectivetraining under the latter’s encouragement, figuring that he can apply hislifetime’s worth of street smarts, spying, making Molotov cocktails, and vanishing through alleyways togood use: cleaning up his hometown.  

Unfortunately, he firstneeds to survive both basic training and the company of his new colleagues atthe station. Not all of whom are impressed by his bluster and recklessdetermination in field exercises. Or his notoriety in returning to the stationhours late from a routine patrol. (For the last time: he swears he’s not visiting any girls on the side! Just because he’s ateenager doesn’t mean his hormones are always raging! The last thing hewants in life is to grow up to become his boss, thanks.)

Needless to say, this poorkid is a regular target of Ezarel’s jokes. Within a few days of his official adoptioninto the force, the forensics officer has coined a new nickname for him thatspread through the department like a virus: ‘Puppy’.

Karuto, the Donut Shop Owner

A police force cannotsurvive without a steady supply of cheap donuts and coffee that comes withinwalking distance. But unlike some franchises that offer free pastries inexchange for police protection, Karuto doesn’t actually need police protection: he was first brought into the station afterusing a kitchen blowtorch against a luckless punk who tried pointing a gun athim over the register one night. The punk lost, by the way, and it was theoutraged donut shop proprietor who was slapped with heavy charges instead. Can’ta man defend his own property anymore without the police state cracking down on him?

In exchange for reduced policesurveillance for his ‘dangerous temper’ (you’ll find out what ‘dangerous’ is ifyou dare clap an ankle-monitor on him),Karuto agreed to provide free pastries and coffee to the entire department.Which inevitably brings them sniffing around his shop every morning andafternoon, but at least they’re there as (nonpaying…) customers instead oflegally-mandated babysitters. For the vast majority of officers, he’s oldenough to be their father.    

Ashkore, the Urban Legend

The notorious master hackerand systems saboteur who was never caught after bringing down the Oracle: the cutting-edgesupercomputer that once occupied a building of its own just behind the policedepartment’s headquarters. Once upon a time, the Oracle had single-handedlytracked city-wide activities at all hours, from mass civilian movement andcommunication, to entertainment and news broadcasts, local traffic on land, sea,and air, changes in the local power grid, economic transfers, hospital activity,and population fluctuations. It was the (some say sentient) supercomputer that keptvigil over the entire city of El and predicted where and when crime happenedfrom a precise convergence of socio-economic triggers, with an astonishingsuccess rate that ushered in years of civilian peace. The police force backthen were merely the arm of the law, arresting the troublemakers that theOracle identified. They didn’t even need to patrol.    

To this day, no one knowsfor certain how Ashkore and his group destroyed the Oracle. (Perhaps they hadcolluders from inside HQ. Or perhaps Ashkore was an ex-officer himself, whichcould explain how he knew precisely when, how, and where to strike.) But their methodseemed to have involved a precise tripping of the city power grid in the deadof night to force the Oracle to fall back briefly on its reserve power sourcebelow its mainframe, shutting off noncritical external security systems forjust a few minutes. Then the hackers moved in, cutting through theround-the-clock team of technicians and engineers who maintained thesupercomputer in the adjoining office. And the next thing the dazed policedepartment of El knew, a fire had broken out from a catastrophic cascade ofshort-circuits that came from deep inside the august machine. By the time thesmoke cleared the following morning, the charred, office-sized hunk that wasthe Oracle was taken apart for inspection and eventually pronounced dead (muchless its cadre of engineers). All except for a single, hand-sized matrix ofcrystal memory chips that miraculously survived the night intact. This mega-chipis now stored in a maximum-security bunker underneath thenow-fearfully-independent police force, in hopes of being the first data blockof the new incarnation of the Oracle (still under construction).

The day after the sabotage,Ashkore’s group leaked an untraceable video on the internet to claimresponsibility for the attack, hailing a new era of freedom now that the commonpeople have wrested control of their lives back from the machine, and that the yokeof the police-controlled city-state has been overthrown. The mastermind himself—wearinga CG dragon’s head digitally-imposed over his face– signed off the video by mock-lecturingthe police force to get off their lazy asses and patrol the streets as wastraditional, using just their wits, brawn, the people they spoke to, and theevidence that they found directly. Oh, and good luck at their new job.          

Needless to say, the manhuntfor the dragon-headed hacker and his cohorts is still ongoing. But without theOracle to guide them, crime spiked in all sectors across El, as civiliansupport fell proportionally and police casualties mounted. The El Police Departmentwas hard-pressed to reapply their old training to keep the main avenues of thecity more-or-less safe to walk through, much less pursue Ashkore and his hostof internet ghosts. Who gallingly proved their corporeal existence by branchingout to other activities: from city council blackmail, to leaking highly-classifiedsecrets apparently copied from the Oracle’s databanks before they fried, tofree-for-all theft, to sabotaging whatever convenient police car strays too farbeyond HQ. Just to be considerate, they always email a photo or video of theirlatest stunt to the police department from an untraceable device less than anhour after the event, signing off with a grinning cartoon dragon icon.    

Actually, it’s hard to sayany longer if it’s really the original group of saboteurs who’s sticking athorn in their side, or a larger, looser offshoot of the original group, or amotivated team of copycats taking up the cause of city anarchists. Regardless, it’sup to the motley, much-reduced police department of El to save their city,restore their people’s trust in them, and rectify what Ashkore and his grouphave catalyzed, before he strikes with a still more ambitious blow from thecrowbar of civil anarchy.  

Whoops. I might have gone a little far with the plot-crafting for that last one. Social subversives are the engine of stories. 

Anyway, I hope this satisfies, @mentacomchocolate. :) Though I’m getting the impression that you’d really like a Valkyon-in-SWAT-uniform picture to go with this, but I can’t find any on the internet. :(

Maybe one of you readers can help out? ;) 

Oh, and uh… don’t forget to review. If you do, I might post part 2 of this set. ;) A police station isn’t just a chest-thumping club anymore. 

Edit: In fact, part 2 is right here. Time for some estrogen action at the police department. 

[quipsnsnips]

I saw something similar to a character development, but more of what they were ‘supposed’ to be and how they ended up. so here’s my take on it.

karleigh 🌻 (karls): she originally started out as a classic aries type of character (lmao fire sign), but became waaaay softer as I worked her out…

•still obsessed with sunflowers, a Kansas piece of trash at heart. •did a lot of alternative modeling for easy cash as she was figuring life out in her early 20’s, but kind of regrets it now that she’s older and has a foster son/soon to be adoptive son (the internet’s forever). •is realizing a lot of things she thought she knew about herself are turning out to be different, is discovering herself again as she learns to really open up. •diagnosed with acute myeloid leukemia at 5 years old, was in remission after chemotherapy & other forms of treatment. currently has myelodysplastic syndrome. very rarely talks of this, doesn’t like talking about it at all. •would’ve gone to med school if she had the guts, but didn’t have that kind of self-confidence. she stuck to what she knew she could do best; helping others through social work (wants to work with kids in schools). •froze her eggs as a last ditch effort incase she wants children of her own in the future, doesn’t/can’t ovulate anymore. •pretty self-conscious about her music tastes (they’re not even BAD) because it seems like everyone she knows has a musical talent or connection, keeps a lot of it to herself as a result so she doesn’t inadvertently alienate herself. •is a helpful nugget who would give you the only shirt off her back if you needed it & listens to anyone’s problems at any time. •is way too trusting/kind/understanding and ends up being betrayed often or taken advantage of (& usually lets them keep doing it unintentionally because she’s too forgiving). •is a bit codependent at moments, but in the end it boils down to whether or not she cares about you 'cause if not she couldn’t care less. there are happy mediums to this for her in friendships of course, but not when it comes to love.

caitlin 🌷 (aka caity or cait): karleigh’s younger sister that was meant to be really innocent and shy, yet snarky and witty but she ended up being a total fucking sass.

•still pretty pure, didn’t lose her virginity until she was 19. (still dating the guy to this day) •was originally supposed to be a pediatric oncologist, but I really liked her more as a cardiothoracic surgeon. (she’s cutthroat, I felt it reflected her better) •is a complete smart ass. sarcasm and dry, witty quips are the languages in which she speaks. •has always been the overachieving child because she felt the need to compensate for everything her parents went through with her older siblings. (josh was a rebellious shit, karleigh was sick) •ridiculously, grossly, stupidly smart. took college courses in high school and had her associates by the time she received her diploma. •as a result graduated college with her bachelors (biochem) in two years; also played volleyball, and was president of her sorority (she’s a try-hard, w/ no life~) •currently works as an LAFD EMT while she puts herself through med school & enjoys it greatly. (ended up with her Dad’s first responder instincts/drive/“hero” complex) •not known to many (since she rarely talks about it) but is a huuuuuuuuuge sap for her boyfriend, who is the first/only guy she’s ever dated. though they’ve been exclusive for close to three years, all of what he does gives her MAD butterflies and brings out her cute, awkward traits as a result. (his phone calls, seeing texts pop up, seeing him in person. everything makes her insides go !!!!!!!) •family-oriented, but extremely career driven as well. feels the need to prove herself a lot as a female in her ruthless & competitive field so she rarely talks about a future home life she eventually desires. (has never admitted to anyone to this day that she had a dream she’d married Anderson and woke up with a stupidly cheesy grin across her face. happy-sighed infatuatedly for the duration of the day) •would never, ever, EVER say it out loud because she’s ridiculously independent and prides herself on it but would also probably follow Andy anywhere if he genuinely asked her to come with. is the type to fall hard but work her ass off for both their dreams to come true. •is certainly Karleigh’s younger sister, but now that they’ve aged into their 20’s they’re a lot closer than what they were growing up. practically best friends instead of annoying siblings. jokes that Karleigh’s her flowerchild and maybe she should’ve been the baby sister instead. •acts like a hard ass, and is incredibly strong as a person, but has moments. she shuts herself up and people out after difficult calls. cries until she feels confident she’s gotten it all out. she has a warm, sensitive soul but is rather picky as to who gets to see it. (Karleigh & Anderson basically)

ryan 🌼 (Karleigh’s AU daughter): I have two ~developments of her, one’s AU and one’s kinda canon so I’m just gonna go into AU. They do blend together at certain moments, but that’s to be expected because she’s still Ryan overall.

•grew up rather similar to a tomboy thanks to Callum & the Xinx boys. doesn’t click very well lifestyle-wise with her other cousins (mirabelle & bethany) as a result but still loves them and hangs out nonetheless. •nicknames include Ry and RJ, mostly Ry. (RJ was what her mother called her). •has a bit of a temper, quick tongue and wit. hell hath no fury like a ryan scorned. isn’t nearly as forgiving or compassionate as her mother was (to a fault), but is still a sensitive person with a lot of empathy. tries to stay reasonable and levelheaded as a result yet often finds herself blowing up here and there. •will insult you/hit you where it hurts if you humiliate or make a fool out of her. she hates feeling like an idiot so if you’re the one who caused it, you’re probably going to hear some blunt, unapologetically harsh words. •at 13, went to live with her aunt & uncle (Caitlin/Anderson) when her mom died in a freak car accident. has a voicemail Karleigh left her the morning of and to this day hasn’t deleted it. would lose her mind if she ever lost the audio for good because it’s all she has. her worst fear is forgetting what Karleigh’s voice sounds like. •finds comfort in the fact she shares a birthday with her Papa Grady, as his favorite story to tell her is how much he wanted her mother to have a baby of her own. Ry’s a living, breathing granted wish of his. Every July 11th the family throws a large party and they have a good time with it. (ryan believes they started this after her mom passed so she wouldn’t feel so alone on that day.) •rather quiet, finds it hard to make friends as easily as some people do. ryan prefers depth in her friendships and relationships. (she’s already lost the most important person in her life so meaningless acquaintances are just that to her—meaningless) •she’s a no bullshit person, has a one strike and you’re out policy. won’t blow smoke up anyone’s ass. either you mesh with her or you don’t. is an introvert so her feathers aren’t ruffled when someone doesn’t want to be friends with her, she’s usually secretively thankful. •ever since she first learned about DNA and the concept of genetics/heredity, has been absolutely fascinated with learning more about it. her major is molecular biology and she lives for it. •is in a bit of an inappropriate situation with an older family friend of her aunt and uncle, and is mortified they’ll find out and think less of her for it. (is actually being preyed upon by someone twice her age yet doesn’t exactly get that, thinks it’s a mutual 'arrangement’ of sorts. it’s not, he’s a real scummy dickweed).

[jamagotchi]

My Back Pain Coach

My Back Pain Coach

My Back Pain Coach

My Back Pain Coach

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=etOfDrIqVtg

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rkkrLiqTobQ

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m8Nb_roFFZo

Back Pain Coach promises to help men and women of all ages cure their back pain by teaching them a 16 minute, eight movement exercise. Here’s how review of how Back Pain Coach works.

What is Back Pain Coach?

Back Pain Coach could be a video-primarily based training system that teaches you a sixteen minute, 8 movement exercise to cure your back pain.

The exercise claims to release a flood of biochemicals into your system, healing your back pain at the supply and permanently relieving your pain.

By adding basic movements to your life, you'll cure yourself of the agony of back pain – or a minimum of, these are the promises created by the video coaching system.

The core of the program consists of a twenty eight minute on-line video. That video explains the distinctive sequence of eight movements that can cure your back pain.

Alternative components of the coaching program embody 9 extra coaching videos regarding strengthening your back also one-on-one coaching once you’ve completed the rear pain exercises.

What’s the Story Behind Back Pain Coach?

Back Pain Coach – like several on-line exercise programs sold on-line – comes with a weird and interesting story.

The creator of the program claims he tried everything when making an attempt to cure his back pain. He tried pain medication, massage therapy, acupuncture, yoga, chiropractors, and many different varieties of treatments. He claims he “drew the line at surgery”. Suffering through unbearable pain, the author of Back Pain Coach randomly met a guy from Serbia named Bojan.

Bojan saw our author suffering with back pain and claimed he knew a cool trick to cure back pain and provide permanent pain relief.

That trick involved browsing eight “straightforward movements” that relieved back pain. Among but sixteen minutes of hunting these motions, our author had treated his back pain.

Afterwards, he claims he’s run thirty miles per week since then and “never experienced back pain once more.”

Contrary to what you will have guessed, Bojan didn’t grasp from “ancient Serbian miracle” or anything along those lines. Instead, Bojan had graduated with a Master’s Degree of Exercise Science from the University of Belgrade. He created some exercise training miracle involving biomechanics, anatomy, and physiology “at a level most healthcare professionals simply don’t have.”

The method is described as controversial because it involves triggering the body’s natural healing mechanisms that eliminate pain.

The creator of the program never explains why this was controversial.

By performing certain movements, you'll trigger the release of blood into the affected areas of your back, forcing your body to heal itself in the most natural means potential.

To show this method in action, the creator of Back Pain Coach has posted a thermal image of some guy’s back. Before treatment, that guy’s back is roofed in blue, green, and purple colours, indicating that he’s ice cold. Once treatment, the guy’s body is completely heat, and also the hotter colours indicate that blood has flooded into the region. The timestamp on the 2 photos is concerning 30 minutes apart. Back Pain Coach claims this is often “proof” that Back Pain Coach works.

What Are the eight Movements in Back Pain Coach?

So what exactly are the mysterious eight movements in Back Pain Coach that promise to remodel your body and revitalize your natural healing processes? The creator of Back Pain Coach posts some data concerning these 8 movements but is deliberately obscure concerning how they work.

Here’s how 3 of those movements are described:

— Movement #1: Begins activating imbalanced muscles, getting ready them for unharness

— Movement #5: Decompresses the lower back, and “shoppers often visibly exhale as years of pent up tension is released.”

— Movement #8: “Gently compresses the spine to flush recent blood out of your discs, then pull in new blood for even additional healing.”

By repeating all 8 of the back Pain Coach movements, the creator of the program claims you can get pleasure from:

— Walking Taller

— Improved Posture

— Stronger Abs And A Stronger Core

— Increased Blood Flow, Oxygen, And Nutrients

Back Pain Coach Pricing

Back Pain Coach is priced at $37.

You'll pay using the secure online form at MyBackpainCoach.com and process payments using VISA, MasterCard, American Express, Discover, or PayPal.

After you make your payment, you’ll immediately receive an email explaining how to get access to the program.

If you think paying $37 for an online video is expensive, then the creator of the program reassures you by stating that he could easily double or triple the worth and make additional cash. He doesn’t do that as a result of “from my perspective, putting a value on your pain isn’t one thing you must be forced to try and do.” Wow, what a pleasant guy!

All purchases conjointly return with a sixty day cash back guarantee. You can receive a full refund anytime at intervals 60 days. As the creator of Back Pain Coach explains, “if you don’t get results, I don’t want your money. Period.”

What’s Included with Back Pain Coach?

Back Pain Coach includes all of the following components:

— Back Pain Relief Core Training Video (explains the eight movements over a twenty eight minute video presentation)

— Mini-Coaching Video Sessions for Back Pain Relief

— One-on-One Coaching (“Simply contact us and we have a tendency to’ll be glad to help but we tend to can”)

— The Begin Your Day Program

Who Created Back Pain Coach?

Back Pain Coach is made by a man in Beaufort, South Carolina named Ian Hart who runs a back pain clinic.

Ian claims that he charges $250 for a scheduled back pain session or $one hundred fifty for a cluster session.

Ian Hart encompasses a Bachelor of Science and is also a Certified Strength and Conditioning Specialist. Becoming a Certified Strength and Conditioning Specialist doesn’t actually require you to take a check or do something: you simply should pay some organization $a hundred and twenty a year, as seen in this membership guide.

[flylifeismylife]

My Back Pain Coach

My Back Pain Coach

My Back Pain Coach

My Back Pain Coach

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=etOfDrIqVtg

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rkkrLiqTobQ

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m8Nb_roFFZo

Back Pain Coach promises to help men and women of all ages cure their back pain by teaching them a 16 minute, eight movement exercise. Here’s how review of how Back Pain Coach works.

What is Back Pain Coach?

Back Pain Coach could be a video-primarily based training system that teaches you a sixteen minute, 8 movement exercise to cure your back pain.

The exercise claims to release a flood of biochemicals into your system, healing your back pain at the supply and permanently relieving your pain.

By adding basic movements to your life, you'll cure yourself of the agony of back pain – or a minimum of, these are the promises created by the video coaching system.

The core of the program consists of a twenty eight minute on-line video. That video explains the distinctive sequence of eight movements that can cure your back pain.

Alternative components of the coaching program embody 9 extra coaching videos regarding strengthening your back also one-on-one coaching once you’ve completed the rear pain exercises.

What’s the Story Behind Back Pain Coach?

Back Pain Coach – like several on-line exercise programs sold on-line – comes with a weird and interesting story.

The creator of the program claims he tried everything when making an attempt to cure his back pain. He tried pain medication, massage therapy, acupuncture, yoga, chiropractors, and many different varieties of treatments. He claims he “drew the line at surgery”. Suffering through unbearable pain, the author of Back Pain Coach randomly met a guy from Serbia named Bojan.

Bojan saw our author suffering with back pain and claimed he knew a cool trick to cure back pain and provide permanent pain relief.

That trick involved browsing eight “straightforward movements” that relieved back pain. Among but sixteen minutes of hunting these motions, our author had treated his back pain.

Afterwards, he claims he’s run thirty miles per week since then and “never experienced back pain once more.”

Contrary to what you will have guessed, Bojan didn’t grasp from “ancient Serbian miracle” or anything along those lines. Instead, Bojan had graduated with a Master’s Degree of Exercise Science from the University of Belgrade. He created some exercise training miracle involving biomechanics, anatomy, and physiology “at a level most healthcare professionals simply don’t have.”

The method is described as controversial because it involves triggering the body’s natural healing mechanisms that eliminate pain.

The creator of the program never explains why this was controversial.

By performing certain movements, you'll trigger the release of blood into the affected areas of your back, forcing your body to heal itself in the most natural means potential.

To show this method in action, the creator of Back Pain Coach has posted a thermal image of some guy’s back. Before treatment, that guy’s back is roofed in blue, green, and purple colours, indicating that he’s ice cold. Once treatment, the guy’s body is completely heat, and also the hotter colours indicate that blood has flooded into the region. The timestamp on the 2 photos is concerning 30 minutes apart. Back Pain Coach claims this is often “proof” that Back Pain Coach works.

What Are the eight Movements in Back Pain Coach?

So what exactly are the mysterious eight movements in Back Pain Coach that promise to remodel your body and revitalize your natural healing processes? The creator of Back Pain Coach posts some data concerning these 8 movements but is deliberately obscure concerning how they work.

Here’s how 3 of those movements are described:

— Movement #1: Begins activating imbalanced muscles, getting ready them for unharness

— Movement #5: Decompresses the lower back, and “shoppers often visibly exhale as years of pent up tension is released.”

— Movement #8: “Gently compresses the spine to flush recent blood out of your discs, then pull in new blood for even additional healing.”

By repeating all 8 of the back Pain Coach movements, the creator of the program claims you can get pleasure from:

— Walking Taller

— Improved Posture

— Stronger Abs And A Stronger Core

— Increased Blood Flow, Oxygen, And Nutrients

Back Pain Coach Pricing

Back Pain Coach is priced at $37.

You'll pay using the secure online form at MyBackpainCoach.com and process payments using VISA, MasterCard, American Express, Discover, or PayPal.

After you make your payment, you’ll immediately receive an email explaining how to get access to the program.

If you think paying $37 for an online video is expensive, then the creator of the program reassures you by stating that he could easily double or triple the worth and make additional cash. He doesn’t do that as a result of “from my perspective, putting a value on your pain isn’t one thing you must be forced to try and do.” Wow, what a pleasant guy!

All purchases conjointly return with a sixty day cash back guarantee. You can receive a full refund anytime at intervals 60 days. As the creator of Back Pain Coach explains, “if you don’t get results, I don’t want your money. Period.”

What’s Included with Back Pain Coach?

Back Pain Coach includes all of the following components:

— Back Pain Relief Core Training Video (explains the eight movements over a twenty eight minute video presentation)

— Mini-Coaching Video Sessions for Back Pain Relief

— One-on-One Coaching (“Simply contact us and we have a tendency to’ll be glad to help but we tend to can”)

— The Begin Your Day Program

Who Created Back Pain Coach?

Back Pain Coach is made by a man in Beaufort, South Carolina named Ian Hart who runs a back pain clinic.

Ian claims that he charges $250 for a scheduled back pain session or $one hundred fifty for a cluster session.

Ian Hart encompasses a Bachelor of Science and is also a Certified Strength and Conditioning Specialist. Becoming a Certified Strength and Conditioning Specialist doesn’t actually require you to take a check or do something: you simply should pay some organization $a hundred and twenty a year, as seen in this membership guide.

[timecrawl-blog1]

My Back Pain Coach

My Back Pain Coach

My Back Pain Coach

My Back Pain Coach

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=etOfDrIqVtg

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rkkrLiqTobQ

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m8Nb_roFFZo

Back Pain Coach promises to help men and women of all ages cure their back pain by teaching them a 16 minute, eight movement exercise. Here’s how review of how Back Pain Coach works.

What is Back Pain Coach?

Back Pain Coach could be a video-primarily based training system that teaches you a sixteen minute, 8 movement exercise to cure your back pain.

The exercise claims to release a flood of biochemicals into your system, healing your back pain at the supply and permanently relieving your pain.

By adding basic movements to your life, you'll cure yourself of the agony of back pain – or a minimum of, these are the promises created by the video coaching system.

The core of the program consists of a twenty eight minute on-line video. That video explains the distinctive sequence of eight movements that can cure your back pain.

Alternative components of the coaching program embody 9 extra coaching videos regarding strengthening your back also one-on-one coaching once you’ve completed the rear pain exercises.

What’s the Story Behind Back Pain Coach?

Back Pain Coach – like several on-line exercise programs sold on-line – comes with a weird and interesting story.

The creator of the program claims he tried everything when making an attempt to cure his back pain. He tried pain medication, massage therapy, acupuncture, yoga, chiropractors, and many different varieties of treatments. He claims he “drew the line at surgery”. Suffering through unbearable pain, the author of Back Pain Coach randomly met a guy from Serbia named Bojan.

Bojan saw our author suffering with back pain and claimed he knew a cool trick to cure back pain and provide permanent pain relief.

That trick involved browsing eight “straightforward movements” that relieved back pain. Among but sixteen minutes of hunting these motions, our author had treated his back pain.

Afterwards, he claims he’s run thirty miles per week since then and “never experienced back pain once more.”

Contrary to what you will have guessed, Bojan didn’t grasp from “ancient Serbian miracle” or anything along those lines. Instead, Bojan had graduated with a Master’s Degree of Exercise Science from the University of Belgrade. He created some exercise training miracle involving biomechanics, anatomy, and physiology “at a level most healthcare professionals simply don’t have.”

The method is described as controversial because it involves triggering the body’s natural healing mechanisms that eliminate pain.

The creator of the program never explains why this was controversial.

By performing certain movements, you'll trigger the release of blood into the affected areas of your back, forcing your body to heal itself in the most natural means potential.

To show this method in action, the creator of Back Pain Coach has posted a thermal image of some guy’s back. Before treatment, that guy’s back is roofed in blue, green, and purple colours, indicating that he’s ice cold. Once treatment, the guy’s body is completely heat, and also the hotter colours indicate that blood has flooded into the region. The timestamp on the 2 photos is concerning 30 minutes apart. Back Pain Coach claims this is often “proof” that Back Pain Coach works.

What Are the eight Movements in Back Pain Coach?

So what exactly are the mysterious eight movements in Back Pain Coach that promise to remodel your body and revitalize your natural healing processes? The creator of Back Pain Coach posts some data concerning these 8 movements but is deliberately obscure concerning how they work.

Here’s how 3 of those movements are described:

— Movement #1: Begins activating imbalanced muscles, getting ready them for unharness

— Movement #5: Decompresses the lower back, and “shoppers often visibly exhale as years of pent up tension is released.”

— Movement #8: “Gently compresses the spine to flush recent blood out of your discs, then pull in new blood for even additional healing.”

By repeating all 8 of the back Pain Coach movements, the creator of the program claims you can get pleasure from:

— Walking Taller

— Improved Posture

— Stronger Abs And A Stronger Core

— Increased Blood Flow, Oxygen, And Nutrients

Back Pain Coach Pricing

Back Pain Coach is priced at $37.

You'll pay using the secure online form at MyBackpainCoach.com and process payments using VISA, MasterCard, American Express, Discover, or PayPal.

After you make your payment, you’ll immediately receive an email explaining how to get access to the program.

If you think paying $37 for an online video is expensive, then the creator of the program reassures you by stating that he could easily double or triple the worth and make additional cash. He doesn’t do that as a result of “from my perspective, putting a value on your pain isn’t one thing you must be forced to try and do.” Wow, what a pleasant guy!

All purchases conjointly return with a sixty day cash back guarantee. You can receive a full refund anytime at intervals 60 days. As the creator of Back Pain Coach explains, “if you don’t get results, I don’t want your money. Period.”

What’s Included with Back Pain Coach?

Back Pain Coach includes all of the following components:

— Back Pain Relief Core Training Video (explains the eight movements over a twenty eight minute video presentation)

— Mini-Coaching Video Sessions for Back Pain Relief

— One-on-One Coaching (“Simply contact us and we have a tendency to’ll be glad to help but we tend to can”)

— The Begin Your Day Program

Who Created Back Pain Coach?

Back Pain Coach is made by a man in Beaufort, South Carolina named Ian Hart who runs a back pain clinic.

Ian claims that he charges $250 for a scheduled back pain session or $one hundred fifty for a cluster session.

Ian Hart encompasses a Bachelor of Science and is also a Certified Strength and Conditioning Specialist. Becoming a Certified Strength and Conditioning Specialist doesn’t actually require you to take a check or do something: you simply should pay some organization $a hundred and twenty a year, as seen in this membership guide.

[verick-mage]

My Back Pain Coach

My Back Pain Coach

My Back Pain Coach

My Back Pain Coach

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=etOfDrIqVtg

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rkkrLiqTobQ

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m8Nb_roFFZo

Back Pain Coach promises to help men and women of all ages cure their back pain by teaching them a 16 minute, eight movement exercise. Here’s how review of how Back Pain Coach works.

What is Back Pain Coach?

Back Pain Coach could be a video-primarily based training system that teaches you a sixteen minute, 8 movement exercise to cure your back pain.

The exercise claims to release a flood of biochemicals into your system, healing your back pain at the supply and permanently relieving your pain.

By adding basic movements to your life, you'll cure yourself of the agony of back pain – or a minimum of, these are the promises created by the video coaching system.

The core of the program consists of a twenty eight minute on-line video. That video explains the distinctive sequence of eight movements that can cure your back pain.

Alternative components of the coaching program embody 9 extra coaching videos regarding strengthening your back also one-on-one coaching once you’ve completed the rear pain exercises.

What’s the Story Behind Back Pain Coach?

Back Pain Coach – like several on-line exercise programs sold on-line – comes with a weird and interesting story.

The creator of the program claims he tried everything when making an attempt to cure his back pain. He tried pain medication, massage therapy, acupuncture, yoga, chiropractors, and many different varieties of treatments. He claims he “drew the line at surgery”. Suffering through unbearable pain, the author of Back Pain Coach randomly met a guy from Serbia named Bojan.

Bojan saw our author suffering with back pain and claimed he knew a cool trick to cure back pain and provide permanent pain relief.

That trick involved browsing eight “straightforward movements” that relieved back pain. Among but sixteen minutes of hunting these motions, our author had treated his back pain.

Afterwards, he claims he’s run thirty miles per week since then and “never experienced back pain once more.”

Contrary to what you will have guessed, Bojan didn’t grasp from “ancient Serbian miracle” or anything along those lines. Instead, Bojan had graduated with a Master’s Degree of Exercise Science from the University of Belgrade. He created some exercise training miracle involving biomechanics, anatomy, and physiology “at a level most healthcare professionals simply don’t have.”

The method is described as controversial because it involves triggering the body’s natural healing mechanisms that eliminate pain.

The creator of the program never explains why this was controversial.

By performing certain movements, you'll trigger the release of blood into the affected areas of your back, forcing your body to heal itself in the most natural means potential.

To show this method in action, the creator of Back Pain Coach has posted a thermal image of some guy’s back. Before treatment, that guy’s back is roofed in blue, green, and purple colours, indicating that he’s ice cold. Once treatment, the guy’s body is completely heat, and also the hotter colours indicate that blood has flooded into the region. The timestamp on the 2 photos is concerning 30 minutes apart. Back Pain Coach claims this is often “proof” that Back Pain Coach works.

What Are the eight Movements in Back Pain Coach?

So what exactly are the mysterious eight movements in Back Pain Coach that promise to remodel your body and revitalize your natural healing processes? The creator of Back Pain Coach posts some data concerning these 8 movements but is deliberately obscure concerning how they work.

Here’s how 3 of those movements are described:

— Movement #1: Begins activating imbalanced muscles, getting ready them for unharness

— Movement #5: Decompresses the lower back, and “shoppers often visibly exhale as years of pent up tension is released.”

— Movement #8: “Gently compresses the spine to flush recent blood out of your discs, then pull in new blood for even additional healing.”

By repeating all 8 of the back Pain Coach movements, the creator of the program claims you can get pleasure from:

— Walking Taller

— Improved Posture

— Stronger Abs And A Stronger Core

— Increased Blood Flow, Oxygen, And Nutrients

Back Pain Coach Pricing

Back Pain Coach is priced at $37.

You'll pay using the secure online form at MyBackpainCoach.com and process payments using VISA, MasterCard, American Express, Discover, or PayPal.

After you make your payment, you’ll immediately receive an email explaining how to get access to the program.

If you think paying $37 for an online video is expensive, then the creator of the program reassures you by stating that he could easily double or triple the worth and make additional cash. He doesn’t do that as a result of “from my perspective, putting a value on your pain isn’t one thing you must be forced to try and do.” Wow, what a pleasant guy!

All purchases conjointly return with a sixty day cash back guarantee. You can receive a full refund anytime at intervals 60 days. As the creator of Back Pain Coach explains, “if you don’t get results, I don’t want your money. Period.”

What’s Included with Back Pain Coach?

Back Pain Coach includes all of the following components:

— Back Pain Relief Core Training Video (explains the eight movements over a twenty eight minute video presentation)

— Mini-Coaching Video Sessions for Back Pain Relief

— One-on-One Coaching (“Simply contact us and we have a tendency to’ll be glad to help but we tend to can”)

— The Begin Your Day Program

Who Created Back Pain Coach?

Back Pain Coach is made by a man in Beaufort, South Carolina named Ian Hart who runs a back pain clinic.

Ian claims that he charges $250 for a scheduled back pain session or $one hundred fifty for a cluster session.

Ian Hart encompasses a Bachelor of Science and is also a Certified Strength and Conditioning Specialist. Becoming a Certified Strength and Conditioning Specialist doesn’t actually require you to take a check or do something: you simply should pay some organization $a hundred and twenty a year, as seen in this membership guide.

[weareallmadeofstone-blog1]

My Back Pain Coach

My Back Pain Coach

My Back Pain Coach

My Back Pain Coach

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=etOfDrIqVtg

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rkkrLiqTobQ

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m8Nb_roFFZo

Back Pain Coach promises to help men and women of all ages cure their back pain by teaching them a 16 minute, eight movement exercise. Here’s how review of how Back Pain Coach works.

What is Back Pain Coach?

Back Pain Coach could be a video-primarily based training system that teaches you a sixteen minute, 8 movement exercise to cure your back pain.

The exercise claims to release a flood of biochemicals into your system, healing your back pain at the supply and permanently relieving your pain.

By adding basic movements to your life, you'll cure yourself of the agony of back pain – or a minimum of, these are the promises created by the video coaching system.

The core of the program consists of a twenty eight minute on-line video. That video explains the distinctive sequence of eight movements that can cure your back pain.

Alternative components of the coaching program embody 9 extra coaching videos regarding strengthening your back also one-on-one coaching once you’ve completed the rear pain exercises.

What’s the Story Behind Back Pain Coach?

Back Pain Coach – like several on-line exercise programs sold on-line – comes with a weird and interesting story.

The creator of the program claims he tried everything when making an attempt to cure his back pain. He tried pain medication, massage therapy, acupuncture, yoga, chiropractors, and many different varieties of treatments. He claims he “drew the line at surgery”. Suffering through unbearable pain, the author of Back Pain Coach randomly met a guy from Serbia named Bojan.

Bojan saw our author suffering with back pain and claimed he knew a cool trick to cure back pain and provide permanent pain relief.

That trick involved browsing eight “straightforward movements” that relieved back pain. Among but sixteen minutes of hunting these motions, our author had treated his back pain.

Afterwards, he claims he’s run thirty miles per week since then and “never experienced back pain once more.”

Contrary to what you will have guessed, Bojan didn’t grasp from “ancient Serbian miracle” or anything along those lines. Instead, Bojan had graduated with a Master’s Degree of Exercise Science from the University of Belgrade. He created some exercise training miracle involving biomechanics, anatomy, and physiology “at a level most healthcare professionals simply don’t have.”

The method is described as controversial because it involves triggering the body’s natural healing mechanisms that eliminate pain.

The creator of the program never explains why this was controversial.

By performing certain movements, you'll trigger the release of blood into the affected areas of your back, forcing your body to heal itself in the most natural means potential.

To show this method in action, the creator of Back Pain Coach has posted a thermal image of some guy’s back. Before treatment, that guy’s back is roofed in blue, green, and purple colours, indicating that he’s ice cold. Once treatment, the guy’s body is completely heat, and also the hotter colours indicate that blood has flooded into the region. The timestamp on the 2 photos is concerning 30 minutes apart. Back Pain Coach claims this is often “proof” that Back Pain Coach works.

What Are the eight Movements in Back Pain Coach?

So what exactly are the mysterious eight movements in Back Pain Coach that promise to remodel your body and revitalize your natural healing processes? The creator of Back Pain Coach posts some data concerning these 8 movements but is deliberately obscure concerning how they work.

Here’s how 3 of those movements are described:

— Movement #1: Begins activating imbalanced muscles, getting ready them for unharness

— Movement #5: Decompresses the lower back, and “shoppers often visibly exhale as years of pent up tension is released.”

— Movement #8: “Gently compresses the spine to flush recent blood out of your discs, then pull in new blood for even additional healing.”

By repeating all 8 of the back Pain Coach movements, the creator of the program claims you can get pleasure from:

— Walking Taller

— Improved Posture

— Stronger Abs And A Stronger Core

— Increased Blood Flow, Oxygen, And Nutrients

Back Pain Coach Pricing

Back Pain Coach is priced at $37.

You'll pay using the secure online form at MyBackpainCoach.com and process payments using VISA, MasterCard, American Express, Discover, or PayPal.

After you make your payment, you’ll immediately receive an email explaining how to get access to the program.

If you think paying $37 for an online video is expensive, then the creator of the program reassures you by stating that he could easily double or triple the worth and make additional cash. He doesn’t do that as a result of “from my perspective, putting a value on your pain isn’t one thing you must be forced to try and do.” Wow, what a pleasant guy!

All purchases conjointly return with a sixty day cash back guarantee. You can receive a full refund anytime at intervals 60 days. As the creator of Back Pain Coach explains, “if you don’t get results, I don’t want your money. Period.”

What’s Included with Back Pain Coach?

Back Pain Coach includes all of the following components:

— Back Pain Relief Core Training Video (explains the eight movements over a twenty eight minute video presentation)

— Mini-Coaching Video Sessions for Back Pain Relief

— One-on-One Coaching (“Simply contact us and we have a tendency to’ll be glad to help but we tend to can”)

— The Begin Your Day Program

Who Created Back Pain Coach?

Back Pain Coach is made by a man in Beaufort, South Carolina named Ian Hart who runs a back pain clinic.

Ian claims that he charges $250 for a scheduled back pain session or $one hundred fifty for a cluster session.

Ian Hart encompasses a Bachelor of Science and is also a Certified Strength and Conditioning Specialist. Becoming a Certified Strength and Conditioning Specialist doesn’t actually require you to take a check or do something: you simply should pay some organization $a hundred and twenty a year, as seen in this membership guide.

[weswegen]

My Back Pain Coach

My Back Pain Coach

My Back Pain Coach

My Back Pain Coach

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=etOfDrIqVtg

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rkkrLiqTobQ

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m8Nb_roFFZo

Back Pain Coach promises to help men and women of all ages cure their back pain by teaching them a 16 minute, eight movement exercise. Here’s how review of how Back Pain Coach works.

What is Back Pain Coach?

Back Pain Coach could be a video-primarily based training system that teaches you a sixteen minute, 8 movement exercise to cure your back pain.

The exercise claims to release a flood of biochemicals into your system, healing your back pain at the supply and permanently relieving your pain.

By adding basic movements to your life, you'll cure yourself of the agony of back pain – or a minimum of, these are the promises created by the video coaching system.

The core of the program consists of a twenty eight minute on-line video. That video explains the distinctive sequence of eight movements that can cure your back pain.

Alternative components of the coaching program embody 9 extra coaching videos regarding strengthening your back also one-on-one coaching once you’ve completed the rear pain exercises.

What’s the Story Behind Back Pain Coach?

Back Pain Coach – like several on-line exercise programs sold on-line – comes with a weird and interesting story.

The creator of the program claims he tried everything when making an attempt to cure his back pain. He tried pain medication, massage therapy, acupuncture, yoga, chiropractors, and many different varieties of treatments. He claims he “drew the line at surgery”. Suffering through unbearable pain, the author of Back Pain Coach randomly met a guy from Serbia named Bojan.

Bojan saw our author suffering with back pain and claimed he knew a cool trick to cure back pain and provide permanent pain relief.

That trick involved browsing eight “straightforward movements” that relieved back pain. Among but sixteen minutes of hunting these motions, our author had treated his back pain.

Afterwards, he claims he’s run thirty miles per week since then and “never experienced back pain once more.”

Contrary to what you will have guessed, Bojan didn’t grasp from “ancient Serbian miracle” or anything along those lines. Instead, Bojan had graduated with a Master’s Degree of Exercise Science from the University of Belgrade. He created some exercise training miracle involving biomechanics, anatomy, and physiology “at a level most healthcare professionals simply don’t have.”

The method is described as controversial because it involves triggering the body’s natural healing mechanisms that eliminate pain.

The creator of the program never explains why this was controversial.

By performing certain movements, you'll trigger the release of blood into the affected areas of your back, forcing your body to heal itself in the most natural means potential.

To show this method in action, the creator of Back Pain Coach has posted a thermal image of some guy’s back. Before treatment, that guy’s back is roofed in blue, green, and purple colours, indicating that he’s ice cold. Once treatment, the guy’s body is completely heat, and also the hotter colours indicate that blood has flooded into the region. The timestamp on the 2 photos is concerning 30 minutes apart. Back Pain Coach claims this is often “proof” that Back Pain Coach works.

What Are the eight Movements in Back Pain Coach?

So what exactly are the mysterious eight movements in Back Pain Coach that promise to remodel your body and revitalize your natural healing processes? The creator of Back Pain Coach posts some data concerning these 8 movements but is deliberately obscure concerning how they work.

Here’s how 3 of those movements are described:

— Movement #1: Begins activating imbalanced muscles, getting ready them for unharness

— Movement #5: Decompresses the lower back, and “shoppers often visibly exhale as years of pent up tension is released.”

— Movement #8: “Gently compresses the spine to flush recent blood out of your discs, then pull in new blood for even additional healing.”

By repeating all 8 of the back Pain Coach movements, the creator of the program claims you can get pleasure from:

— Walking Taller

— Improved Posture

— Stronger Abs And A Stronger Core

— Increased Blood Flow, Oxygen, And Nutrients

Back Pain Coach Pricing

Back Pain Coach is priced at $37.

You'll pay using the secure online form at MyBackpainCoach.com and process payments using VISA, MasterCard, American Express, Discover, or PayPal.

After you make your payment, you’ll immediately receive an email explaining how to get access to the program.

If you think paying $37 for an online video is expensive, then the creator of the program reassures you by stating that he could easily double or triple the worth and make additional cash. He doesn’t do that as a result of “from my perspective, putting a value on your pain isn’t one thing you must be forced to try and do.” Wow, what a pleasant guy!

All purchases conjointly return with a sixty day cash back guarantee. You can receive a full refund anytime at intervals 60 days. As the creator of Back Pain Coach explains, “if you don’t get results, I don’t want your money. Period.”

What’s Included with Back Pain Coach?

Back Pain Coach includes all of the following components:

— Back Pain Relief Core Training Video (explains the eight movements over a twenty eight minute video presentation)

— Mini-Coaching Video Sessions for Back Pain Relief

— One-on-One Coaching (“Simply contact us and we have a tendency to’ll be glad to help but we tend to can”)

— The Begin Your Day Program

Who Created Back Pain Coach?

Back Pain Coach is made by a man in Beaufort, South Carolina named Ian Hart who runs a back pain clinic.

Ian claims that he charges $250 for a scheduled back pain session or $one hundred fifty for a cluster session.

Ian Hart encompasses a Bachelor of Science and is also a Certified Strength and Conditioning Specialist. Becoming a Certified Strength and Conditioning Specialist doesn’t actually require you to take a check or do something: you simply should pay some organization $a hundred and twenty a year, as seen in this membership guide.

[ughwhyarealltheusernamestaken]

My Back Pain Coach

My Back Pain Coach

My Back Pain Coach

My Back Pain Coach

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=etOfDrIqVtg

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rkkrLiqTobQ

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m8Nb_roFFZo

Back Pain Coach promises to help men and women of all ages cure their back pain by teaching them a 16 minute, eight movement exercise. Here’s how review of how Back Pain Coach works.

What is Back Pain Coach?

Back Pain Coach could be a video-primarily based training system that teaches you a sixteen minute, 8 movement exercise to cure your back pain.

The exercise claims to release a flood of biochemicals into your system, healing your back pain at the supply and permanently relieving your pain.

By adding basic movements to your life, you'll cure yourself of the agony of back pain – or a minimum of, these are the promises created by the video coaching system.

The core of the program consists of a twenty eight minute on-line video. That video explains the distinctive sequence of eight movements that can cure your back pain.

Alternative components of the coaching program embody 9 extra coaching videos regarding strengthening your back also one-on-one coaching once you’ve completed the rear pain exercises.

What’s the Story Behind Back Pain Coach?

Back Pain Coach – like several on-line exercise programs sold on-line – comes with a weird and interesting story.

The creator of the program claims he tried everything when making an attempt to cure his back pain. He tried pain medication, massage therapy, acupuncture, yoga, chiropractors, and many different varieties of treatments. He claims he “drew the line at surgery”. Suffering through unbearable pain, the author of Back Pain Coach randomly met a guy from Serbia named Bojan.

Bojan saw our author suffering with back pain and claimed he knew a cool trick to cure back pain and provide permanent pain relief.

That trick involved browsing eight “straightforward movements” that relieved back pain. Among but sixteen minutes of hunting these motions, our author had treated his back pain.

Afterwards, he claims he’s run thirty miles per week since then and “never experienced back pain once more.”

Contrary to what you will have guessed, Bojan didn’t grasp from “ancient Serbian miracle” or anything along those lines. Instead, Bojan had graduated with a Master’s Degree of Exercise Science from the University of Belgrade. He created some exercise training miracle involving biomechanics, anatomy, and physiology “at a level most healthcare professionals simply don’t have.”

The method is described as controversial because it involves triggering the body’s natural healing mechanisms that eliminate pain.

The creator of the program never explains why this was controversial.

By performing certain movements, you'll trigger the release of blood into the affected areas of your back, forcing your body to heal itself in the most natural means potential.

To show this method in action, the creator of Back Pain Coach has posted a thermal image of some guy’s back. Before treatment, that guy’s back is roofed in blue, green, and purple colours, indicating that he’s ice cold. Once treatment, the guy’s body is completely heat, and also the hotter colours indicate that blood has flooded into the region. The timestamp on the 2 photos is concerning 30 minutes apart. Back Pain Coach claims this is often “proof” that Back Pain Coach works.

What Are the eight Movements in Back Pain Coach?

So what exactly are the mysterious eight movements in Back Pain Coach that promise to remodel your body and revitalize your natural healing processes? The creator of Back Pain Coach posts some data concerning these 8 movements but is deliberately obscure concerning how they work.

Here’s how 3 of those movements are described:

— Movement #1: Begins activating imbalanced muscles, getting ready them for unharness

— Movement #5: Decompresses the lower back, and “shoppers often visibly exhale as years of pent up tension is released.”

— Movement #8: “Gently compresses the spine to flush recent blood out of your discs, then pull in new blood for even additional healing.”

By repeating all 8 of the back Pain Coach movements, the creator of the program claims you can get pleasure from:

— Walking Taller

— Improved Posture

— Stronger Abs And A Stronger Core

— Increased Blood Flow, Oxygen, And Nutrients

Back Pain Coach Pricing

Back Pain Coach is priced at $37.

You'll pay using the secure online form at MyBackpainCoach.com and process payments using VISA, MasterCard, American Express, Discover, or PayPal.

After you make your payment, you’ll immediately receive an email explaining how to get access to the program.

If you think paying $37 for an online video is expensive, then the creator of the program reassures you by stating that he could easily double or triple the worth and make additional cash. He doesn’t do that as a result of “from my perspective, putting a value on your pain isn’t one thing you must be forced to try and do.” Wow, what a pleasant guy!

All purchases conjointly return with a sixty day cash back guarantee. You can receive a full refund anytime at intervals 60 days. As the creator of Back Pain Coach explains, “if you don’t get results, I don’t want your money. Period.”

What’s Included with Back Pain Coach?

Back Pain Coach includes all of the following components:

— Back Pain Relief Core Training Video (explains the eight movements over a twenty eight minute video presentation)

— Mini-Coaching Video Sessions for Back Pain Relief

— One-on-One Coaching (“Simply contact us and we have a tendency to’ll be glad to help but we tend to can”)

— The Begin Your Day Program

Who Created Back Pain Coach?

Back Pain Coach is made by a man in Beaufort, South Carolina named Ian Hart who runs a back pain clinic.

Ian claims that he charges $250 for a scheduled back pain session or $one hundred fifty for a cluster session.

Ian Hart encompasses a Bachelor of Science and is also a Certified Strength and Conditioning Specialist. Becoming a Certified Strength and Conditioning Specialist doesn’t actually require you to take a check or do something: you simply should pay some organization $a hundred and twenty a year, as seen in this membership guide.

[we-are-the-hated-ones]

My Back Pain Coach

My Back Pain Coach

My Back Pain Coach

My Back Pain Coach

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=etOfDrIqVtg

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rkkrLiqTobQ

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m8Nb_roFFZo

Back Pain Coach promises to help men and women of all ages cure their back pain by teaching them a 16 minute, eight movement exercise. Here’s how review of how Back Pain Coach works.

What is Back Pain Coach?

Back Pain Coach could be a video-primarily based training system that teaches you a sixteen minute, 8 movement exercise to cure your back pain.

The exercise claims to release a flood of biochemicals into your system, healing your back pain at the supply and permanently relieving your pain.

By adding basic movements to your life, you'll cure yourself of the agony of back pain – or a minimum of, these are the promises created by the video coaching system.

The core of the program consists of a twenty eight minute on-line video. That video explains the distinctive sequence of eight movements that can cure your back pain.

Alternative components of the coaching program embody 9 extra coaching videos regarding strengthening your back also one-on-one coaching once you’ve completed the rear pain exercises.

What’s the Story Behind Back Pain Coach?

Back Pain Coach – like several on-line exercise programs sold on-line – comes with a weird and interesting story.

The creator of the program claims he tried everything when making an attempt to cure his back pain. He tried pain medication, massage therapy, acupuncture, yoga, chiropractors, and many different varieties of treatments. He claims he “drew the line at surgery”. Suffering through unbearable pain, the author of Back Pain Coach randomly met a guy from Serbia named Bojan.

Bojan saw our author suffering with back pain and claimed he knew a cool trick to cure back pain and provide permanent pain relief.

That trick involved browsing eight “straightforward movements” that relieved back pain. Among but sixteen minutes of hunting these motions, our author had treated his back pain.

Afterwards, he claims he’s run thirty miles per week since then and “never experienced back pain once more.”

Contrary to what you will have guessed, Bojan didn’t grasp from “ancient Serbian miracle” or anything along those lines. Instead, Bojan had graduated with a Master’s Degree of Exercise Science from the University of Belgrade. He created some exercise training miracle involving biomechanics, anatomy, and physiology “at a level most healthcare professionals simply don’t have.”

The method is described as controversial because it involves triggering the body’s natural healing mechanisms that eliminate pain.

The creator of the program never explains why this was controversial.

By performing certain movements, you'll trigger the release of blood into the affected areas of your back, forcing your body to heal itself in the most natural means potential.

To show this method in action, the creator of Back Pain Coach has posted a thermal image of some guy’s back. Before treatment, that guy’s back is roofed in blue, green, and purple colours, indicating that he’s ice cold. Once treatment, the guy’s body is completely heat, and also the hotter colours indicate that blood has flooded into the region. The timestamp on the 2 photos is concerning 30 minutes apart. Back Pain Coach claims this is often “proof” that Back Pain Coach works.

What Are the eight Movements in Back Pain Coach?

So what exactly are the mysterious eight movements in Back Pain Coach that promise to remodel your body and revitalize your natural healing processes? The creator of Back Pain Coach posts some data concerning these 8 movements but is deliberately obscure concerning how they work.

Here’s how 3 of those movements are described:

— Movement #1: Begins activating imbalanced muscles, getting ready them for unharness

— Movement #5: Decompresses the lower back, and “shoppers often visibly exhale as years of pent up tension is released.”

— Movement #8: “Gently compresses the spine to flush recent blood out of your discs, then pull in new blood for even additional healing.”

By repeating all 8 of the back Pain Coach movements, the creator of the program claims you can get pleasure from:

— Walking Taller

— Improved Posture

— Stronger Abs And A Stronger Core

— Increased Blood Flow, Oxygen, And Nutrients

Back Pain Coach Pricing

Back Pain Coach is priced at $37.

You'll pay using the secure online form at MyBackpainCoach.com and process payments using VISA, MasterCard, American Express, Discover, or PayPal.

After you make your payment, you’ll immediately receive an email explaining how to get access to the program.

If you think paying $37 for an online video is expensive, then the creator of the program reassures you by stating that he could easily double or triple the worth and make additional cash. He doesn’t do that as a result of “from my perspective, putting a value on your pain isn’t one thing you must be forced to try and do.” Wow, what a pleasant guy!

All purchases conjointly return with a sixty day cash back guarantee. You can receive a full refund anytime at intervals 60 days. As the creator of Back Pain Coach explains, “if you don’t get results, I don’t want your money. Period.”

What’s Included with Back Pain Coach?

Back Pain Coach includes all of the following components:

— Back Pain Relief Core Training Video (explains the eight movements over a twenty eight minute video presentation)

— Mini-Coaching Video Sessions for Back Pain Relief

— One-on-One Coaching (“Simply contact us and we have a tendency to’ll be glad to help but we tend to can”)

— The Begin Your Day Program

Who Created Back Pain Coach?

Back Pain Coach is made by a man in Beaufort, South Carolina named Ian Hart who runs a back pain clinic.

Ian claims that he charges $250 for a scheduled back pain session or $one hundred fifty for a cluster session.

Ian Hart encompasses a Bachelor of Science and is also a Certified Strength and Conditioning Specialist. Becoming a Certified Strength and Conditioning Specialist doesn’t actually require you to take a check or do something: you simply should pay some organization $a hundred and twenty a year, as seen in this membership guide.

[tinlizi]

My Back Pain Coach

My Back Pain Coach

My Back Pain Coach

My Back Pain Coach

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=etOfDrIqVtg

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rkkrLiqTobQ

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m8Nb_roFFZo

Back Pain Coach promises to help men and women of all ages cure their back pain by teaching them a 16 minute, eight movement exercise. Here’s how review of how Back Pain Coach works.

What is Back Pain Coach?

Back Pain Coach could be a video-primarily based training system that teaches you a sixteen minute, 8 movement exercise to cure your back pain.

The exercise claims to release a flood of biochemicals into your system, healing your back pain at the supply and permanently relieving your pain.

By adding basic movements to your life, you'll cure yourself of the agony of back pain – or a minimum of, these are the promises created by the video coaching system.

The core of the program consists of a twenty eight minute on-line video. That video explains the distinctive sequence of eight movements that can cure your back pain.

Alternative components of the coaching program embody 9 extra coaching videos regarding strengthening your back also one-on-one coaching once you’ve completed the rear pain exercises.

What’s the Story Behind Back Pain Coach?

Back Pain Coach – like several on-line exercise programs sold on-line – comes with a weird and interesting story.

The creator of the program claims he tried everything when making an attempt to cure his back pain. He tried pain medication, massage therapy, acupuncture, yoga, chiropractors, and many different varieties of treatments. He claims he “drew the line at surgery”. Suffering through unbearable pain, the author of Back Pain Coach randomly met a guy from Serbia named Bojan.

Bojan saw our author suffering with back pain and claimed he knew a cool trick to cure back pain and provide permanent pain relief.

That trick involved browsing eight “straightforward movements” that relieved back pain. Among but sixteen minutes of hunting these motions, our author had treated his back pain.

Afterwards, he claims he’s run thirty miles per week since then and “never experienced back pain once more.”

Contrary to what you will have guessed, Bojan didn’t grasp from “ancient Serbian miracle” or anything along those lines. Instead, Bojan had graduated with a Master’s Degree of Exercise Science from the University of Belgrade. He created some exercise training miracle involving biomechanics, anatomy, and physiology “at a level most healthcare professionals simply don’t have.”

The method is described as controversial because it involves triggering the body’s natural healing mechanisms that eliminate pain.

The creator of the program never explains why this was controversial.

By performing certain movements, you'll trigger the release of blood into the affected areas of your back, forcing your body to heal itself in the most natural means potential.

To show this method in action, the creator of Back Pain Coach has posted a thermal image of some guy’s back. Before treatment, that guy’s back is roofed in blue, green, and purple colours, indicating that he’s ice cold. Once treatment, the guy’s body is completely heat, and also the hotter colours indicate that blood has flooded into the region. The timestamp on the 2 photos is concerning 30 minutes apart. Back Pain Coach claims this is often “proof” that Back Pain Coach works.

What Are the eight Movements in Back Pain Coach?

So what exactly are the mysterious eight movements in Back Pain Coach that promise to remodel your body and revitalize your natural healing processes? The creator of Back Pain Coach posts some data concerning these 8 movements but is deliberately obscure concerning how they work.

Here’s how 3 of those movements are described:

— Movement #1: Begins activating imbalanced muscles, getting ready them for unharness

— Movement #5: Decompresses the lower back, and “shoppers often visibly exhale as years of pent up tension is released.”

— Movement #8: “Gently compresses the spine to flush recent blood out of your discs, then pull in new blood for even additional healing.”

By repeating all 8 of the back Pain Coach movements, the creator of the program claims you can get pleasure from:

— Walking Taller

— Improved Posture

— Stronger Abs And A Stronger Core

— Increased Blood Flow, Oxygen, And Nutrients

Back Pain Coach Pricing

Back Pain Coach is priced at $37.

You'll pay using the secure online form at MyBackpainCoach.com and process payments using VISA, MasterCard, American Express, Discover, or PayPal.

After you make your payment, you’ll immediately receive an email explaining how to get access to the program.

If you think paying $37 for an online video is expensive, then the creator of the program reassures you by stating that he could easily double or triple the worth and make additional cash. He doesn’t do that as a result of “from my perspective, putting a value on your pain isn’t one thing you must be forced to try and do.” Wow, what a pleasant guy!

All purchases conjointly return with a sixty day cash back guarantee. You can receive a full refund anytime at intervals 60 days. As the creator of Back Pain Coach explains, “if you don’t get results, I don’t want your money. Period.”

What’s Included with Back Pain Coach?

Back Pain Coach includes all of the following components:

— Back Pain Relief Core Training Video (explains the eight movements over a twenty eight minute video presentation)

— Mini-Coaching Video Sessions for Back Pain Relief

— One-on-One Coaching (“Simply contact us and we have a tendency to’ll be glad to help but we tend to can”)

— The Begin Your Day Program

Who Created Back Pain Coach?

Back Pain Coach is made by a man in Beaufort, South Carolina named Ian Hart who runs a back pain clinic.

Ian claims that he charges $250 for a scheduled back pain session or $one hundred fifty for a cluster session.

Ian Hart encompasses a Bachelor of Science and is also a Certified Strength and Conditioning Specialist. Becoming a Certified Strength and Conditioning Specialist doesn’t actually require you to take a check or do something: you simply should pay some organization $a hundred and twenty a year, as seen in this membership guide.