#hi hello i'm trash glad we established that

[theflyingfeeling]

hi hello I'm here with another establishement to the terrible Olli/Allu infidelity AU, yes I should stop I know I know I knoooooww but listen, this time it's a sort of sequel to this fic of the same theme and inspired by this so yeah, to sum up:

Olli comes to the possession of Aleksi's shorts and proceeds to pleasure himself while wearing them, thinking of Aleksi. There's lots of pining, angst, and general misery in it too. Rommi and Rilla are mentioned.

~

Olli was exactly where he was supposed to be.

Instead of city lights, there was the sun still greeting him from behind pines and birches when he sat up to look out the window, despite his smartwatch reading half past midnight. Instead of the noise of traffic or the strangers in the next room talking too loudly, Olli heard the chirp of early morning willow warblers and the occasional rustle of leaves in the wind.

And the deep, calm breathing next to him.

She was sleeping peacefully, a rosy blush still colouring her cheeks from their earlier lovemaking. Her hair was spread on the pillow under her head, long and blonde like a mermaid's, and so very unlike Aleksi's. Suddenly Olli remembered all those mornings on tour, when he had woken up to blonde hair on his face, on his eyes and mouth and cheeks, and he had to get out the cottage before the sobs that were building up inside his chest would burst out and wake her up.

He grabbed his phone and a pair of black shorts to pull on his naked self, and then he sneaked out, tiptoeing past Niko and Minna's bedroom to not raise any unneeded attention as to why he was going out alone at that hour. There was no sound from the other room, so Olli assumed the other couple was already finished with their nightly activities as well and were now soundly asleep, enabling Olli's escape, even if he wasn't going any farther than the back porch of the Moilanen’s family cottage.

The tears that had been burning the rims of his eyes finally came when he sat on the cushioned garden chair on the porch. He let them stream down his cheeks soundlessly, knowing he'd feel better if he did, while still swallowing his sobs back to wherever they had come from. No matter how much he wanted to cry out his yearning for something he was never allowed to have, so loud that Aleksi could hear him all the way from Lapland to the south of Finland, he could not risk anyone inside the cottage to hear him, especially not her. She had already seemed suspicious earlier that day, eyeing the shorts he had been wearing (or maybe he had just imagined it, feeling tense from just having the garment touch his thighs).

"Why can't I remember seeing those before? Did you buy them on tour?" she had asked, seconds after they had gotten out of the car in the front yard of the cottage, with Minna waving at them from the window.

Olli's mind had instantly filled with perfectly believable explanations to give her. 'They're Aleksi's, in fact, but he doesn't wear them anymore, so he gave them to me, because the other alternative would have been to throw them in the trash I guess', or 'Aleksi couldn't fit them in his luggage when we left Hilltop Forest last week, yeah, I don't know how that was possible either, but in any case I promised to take them and give them back to him next week after midsummer, please don't tell him I've been wearing them though, haha, that wasn't part of the deal, but they're just so comfy' and she likely wouldn't have even batted an eye at either explanation. She probably would have even baked biscuits for Olli to give Aleksi with the shorts. Yet, there was something that had kept him from mentioning Aleksi's name.

"Uh, yeah. Got them from Tokyo."

Olli's paranoia had turned into a relief that had soon mixed with guilt as she had complemented how nicely the shorts brought out the curve of his ass, just in time before Minna would step out of the cottage to welcome them with Rommi zooming past her. Either way, Olli had been glad she had asked about the shorts before they'd see Niko, who might or might not have recognized them as Aleksi's and blown Olli's cover in the blink of an eye. Then again, their clothes mixed on tour all the time so that sometimes they weren't even sure which clothes were their own, let alone whose socks or t-shirt was stinking on the tour bus floor, so perhaps Olli was safe in that regard. Perhaps Niko had only glanced at them and then at him with a sorry angle to his eyebrows when the girls had browsed gowns to wear to the wedding of the century.

To his defence, Olli couldn't have told the truth about the origin of the shorts anyway, for he had no memory of putting them in his own backpack after the Hilltop Forest party. He wanted to call Aleksi and ask, knowing the man would still be awake, but if he did call him, he feared he was going to be crushed by the pressure of having to speak about what they had done there (given each other handjobs while everyone else was asleep), or even having to speak about the unspeakable (the ring Aleksi had started to wear in his left hand), so he was forced to abandon the idea before it would consume him; before the thought of hearing Aleksi's quiet voice on the phoneline would trump everything and have him do something erratic, such as getting in the car and drive all night, just to ask Aleksi to call off the plans of pink roses on every table and his brother's band playing at the reception.

Aleksi had made his choice, and Olli was not it. Olli accepted it too, knowing there were too many obstacles on their way for anything more to happen, other than hasty handjobs in the tour bus or sucking each other off in backstage bathrooms. That was all there was ever meant to be, and even that should never have happened; Olli should never have let that happen, but when he was stuck in a truckstop in the middle of Texas and missed being that close to someone and having his heart crush his ribcage to little pieces, what chance did he have to hold himself back? What chance did he have, when Aleksi was right there with his bluest eyes and his lips sculptured from the finest marble, prettier than–

Olli should have slapped himself for even thinking that.

Wiping his cheeks, he sat back on the chair and felt a streak of light in his eyes from behind the woods. He turned his face away from the midnight sun, the only witness to what they had done the week before, and now to Olli's meltdown as well. Great, he thought, first Niko, who knows more than he should because we forgot to lock the bathroom door once, and probably Minna too, who knows because Niko knows, and now I can't face the sun anymore either, in fear of it spilling all my secrets about how much I need Aleksi.

Olli shook his head in frustration and cast his eyes to his lap, to the black garment wrapping around his thighs. Why he was wearing the shorts that day in the first place was almost a bigger mystery than how he had come into the possession of them. Maybe he genuinely thought they were comfy, or at least comfier than his only clean pair of shorts. Maybe, in some strange, self-destructing way he thought they'd make him feel closer to Aleksi and the most recent night they had shared. He stroked the white embroidery with his thumb and immediately remembered how warm Aleksi's skin had felt underneath it, soft and full against Olli's palm as he had slid his hand inside the pant leg. A sigh turned into a groan when memories of Aleksi panting and squirming filled his head, and something would throb below his palm, just like something had throbbed below his palm in the moment they had shared on the porch of the fancy rental cottage a week ago.

He had told Aleksi to stay quiet, nibbled on his earlobe and the earring Aleksi had put back on after sauna. Aleksi hadn't needed to be told twice, as he, too, was well aware they had way more to lose than to win in this reckless little game they kept playing; kept and couldn't stop despite the warning signs, despite each touch that they shared becoming more needy and thus more dangerous. It had not been Olli's plan to let it happen there, where they had been surrounded by not only their bandmates but also their business associates from the record label, but when Olli had seen the tent on the front of Aleksi's swimming shorts in the sauna after they had given each other a good old beating with the vasta, there was little else he was able to think about for the rest of the evening. A stronger man would have fought against the temptation and just saved the moment for a private fantasy when jerking off. Olli, however, could not blow his own trumpet in that regard, and so he found himself seeking Aleksi's proximity all night, waiting until the others would retreat to their rooms so that he could finally put his hands on Aleksi.

Sure, he wasn't the only one to blame. If Aleksi had wanted to, he could have told Olli to back off, could have asked Olli to respect his decision and that stupid, shiny piece of jewellery on his finger, but he hadn't, not once. Instead he had spread his legs to give Olli more room to massage him through his shorts, those shorts, and leaned his head away from Olli to expose his neck for Olli to mouth on. They rarely kissed – only when they were tipsy or heartbroken enough – perhaps so that they could pretend none of it meant anything to either of them. In reality, it meant the world to Olli, to be allowed to touch and kiss Aleksi's body as if he was meant to do it, as if they belonged only to each other and not to some completely different people.

Shivers ran down Olli's spine as he remembered how Aleksi's cock had pulsated under his touch, similar to how his own erection was now pulsating inside the shorts. He shoved the remorse and shame aside for the sake of letting the memory swallow him, for the sake of travelling back in time and space to that chilly summer evening that had had them both sweating and breathing heavily by the end of it. Slowly rubbing his own hard-on, he closed his eyes and wished he could be doing that to Aleksi the way he had done then, making the man panting, writhing, whispering into Olli's ear to beg for him to make Aleksi come, darned be the fresh pair of underpants he'd ruin. Olli bit his lip to not laugh out loud at the memory of Aleksi suddenly stopping him, remembering he would have no extra ones to change into if he was to jizz his pants, so as a compromise he had pulled his hard cock out of his boxers and fit it inside a pant leg so that his tip had been peeking from under the black fabric. The sight had mesmerised Olli and had almost made him switch from sucking Aleksi's neck to sucking his dick instead, if the small noises Aleksi had been making into Olli's ear hadn't convinced him to keep on kissing Aleksi's neck and jawline.

Olli squeezed his own cock and remembered how hard Aleksi had been for him. He remembered Aleksi's hot, heavy breaths, similar to his own breathless sighs now. He remembered Aleksi's lips finding his at last, hungry and greedy just like Olli's own had been. He remembered Aleksi whimpering into his mouth as he had approached his peak, the sound of it alone almost enough to make Olli come too. He remembered how Aleksi had grabbed the front of Olli's shirt, how he had muffled his sobs against it when his orgasm had washed over him.

Olli had not been sure if they had been sobs of pleasure or of something else. He hadn't dared to ask, afraid the answer might be something he didn't want to hear.

Almost ready to come himself, Olli rubbed his cock through the shorts with more force and decided to focus on the memory of Aleksi's climax instead of his cries, of Aleksi's cock pulsating inside the pant leg and finally shooting thick cum on his own thigh. It was pathetic, Olli knew, but it was hardly the first time during the past week Olli had masturbated to that image, and if he wasn't missing Aleksi so much, if he wasn't so consumed by the longing he had for his friend, he would have felt ashamed for cumming as hard as he did while thinking about Aleksi's semen dripping down his thigh. Olli's hips jerked and he felt the fabric of the shorts getting damp from his jizz, and just barely he was able to keep himself from moaning into the summer night from the strength of his orgasm, to have the reindeer they had seen on the road to the cottage earlier that day hear his groans of euphoria and misery alike.

The guilt returned faster than it usually did, but Olli supposed it was because he was alone. He sniffled, then, feeling sorry for himself for having no panting, blissed out Aleksi next to him to nuzzle on his shoulder, to carry half of Olli’s sins. He sniffled again, remembering he did have someone inside the cottage who'd do exactly that and more; someone who had made him a chocolate cake for breakfast when he came back home from tour and had offered to give him a massage to wash off the frown that seemed to be stuck on his face as of late; someone who cared for him, needed him, and didn't go around putting rings on other people’s fingers.

It wasn't her sin to bear, though. She deserved far better than that.

His hands were shaking when he took out his phone from his pocket. He wasn't even sure why he had taken it with him when he had gotten up in the dead of night. It must have been an unconscious choice, much like the one he had made in the morning, looking at two pairs of almost identical shorts and choosing the ones his stupid heart had told him to.

In spite of his earlier hesitation, his finger was soon hovering over Aleksi’s name. 

He didn't expect Aleksi to pick up at almost one in the morning, even if it was summer and holiday and Aleksi was probably still awake at his studio, working on a solo project or scheduling emails to be sent the next day. At the same time he knew Aleksi would, for those exact reasons.

"Hey."

"Hey," Olli answered. He wiped his nose on his wrist.

"Can't sleep?"

"Yeah."

"Me neither. Fucking jetlag..." Aleksi's voice was strangely quiet. Olli didn't want to think about him taking the call while upstairs, with her.

"Watcha doing?" he asked, just to have Aleksi tell him he wasn't.

"Nothing much. Just... killing time at the studio."

Olli sighed. 

Killing time because you're bored and sleepless, or killing time until you'll get to climb back upstairs to an empty bed when she's already left for work?

"What about you?"

The sniffles wouldn't stop, no matter how Olli tried to keep them in.

"Thinking about you."

He didn't know what else to tell Aleksi.

"Oh."

The line fell quiet then, and Olli saw no need to break the silence. He settled for listening to the distant cuckoo from deep in the woods and wondered if Aleksi could hear it too; if that way they could pretend they were together.

"I've been thinking about you too. A lot. I know I shouldn't, because–"

"Don't say it," Olli spoke over him.

My heart's already as if stabbed, I don't need you to twist the knife any further.

They said nothing again for almost a minute, just listened to each other's breathing. In that moment, it was enough, and much better than filling the silence with truths that made Olli want to groan in agony.

He looked down at his hands, at his lap.

"I have your shorts," he told Aleksi. He could lie to himself and say he did it in case Aleksi had wondered about them, but he knew that wasn't the reason.

Aleksi stayed quiet for another moment before answering.

"I know."

It couldn't have meant what Olli hoped it meant. It wouldn't have been fair of Aleksi.

"I'll give them back to you next week," he forced out of his mouth, managing to do so without his voice trembling. The white text on the pant leg was beginning to blur.

"Okay. Thanks."

My fucking pleasure, Mattson.

"Can't wait to see you next week," Aleksi said, as if he had sensed Olli was about to hang up on him out of sheer bitterness.

Bitterness over Aleksi torturing him like this, or bitterness over the situation in general? Be as it may, Olli knew he wasn't entitled to such a feeling in the first place.

On the other end of the line, Aleksi exhaled.

"Fuck it, Olli, I miss you. I know I shouldn't, but... fuck," the man swore out his evident frustration.

No matter which way Olli tried to put it, the situation wasn't fair for any of them. He sniffled again.

"I miss you too. Too much."

A silence fell on the phone line once more, a melancholic one this time, rather than a tense or an expectant one. It was broken when Olli heard Aleksi's office chair creak.

"I think Rilla's awake upstairs. I may need to go up and let her out. She's been having stomach issues."

"Say hi to her from me," Olli said and wiped something off his cheek.

"Yeah, I will," Aleksi promised. After a brief pause, he spoke again. "Thanks for the call. I was...actually thinking of calling myself, but–"

Olli couldn't bear hearing Aleksi's reasons. "See you next week." 

"Yeah. Bye."

One last, self-pitying sniffle and Olli was back on his feet. The cum inside the shorts was starting to cool, making him despise the piece of clothing for the discomfort and guilt they were giving him. Back in the bedroom, with her deep asleep and thus oblivious to Olli's absence, Olli stripped himself naked again and crammed Aleksi's shorts deep in his backpack, hoping he'd be able to do something about them without her noticing. It wasn't going to be easy, with her on her annual summer leave from work and always home with him now that he was there too for once, so maybe he'd have to sneak out at midnight again to scrub them clean. Whatever Aleksi's intentions had been, Olli doubted he wanted his beloved shorts back all crusty from dried-out semen.

Careful to not alert the sleeping woman on the other side of the bed, Olli slid under the duvet and lay on his back, eyes on the ceiling.

Olli was exactly where he was supposed to be.

But wasn't it funny, how the place where he wanted to be was some place else entirely. 

[disco-elysium-via-polls]

🎵Protorave

More tribalistic markings -- this post is covered in little humanoids.

A pole screwed into the ice keeps the tent erect.

Trash from some unending party.

PILE OF ETERNITE - A pane of eternite has been planted into the snow. Two poles are holding it up.

INTERFACING [Easy: Success] - *Barely* holding it up. It could fall over any minute... a stronger gust of wind might be enough.

"What is this?"

Push the eternite over.

[Leave it as is.]

KIM KITSURAGI - "It looks like a makeshift bridge." The lieutenant adjusts his collar against a cool breeze. "Could be convenient."

2. Push the eternite over.

PILE OF ETERNITE - The pane falls into the icy snow with a soft thunk.

That's going to save us like 10 seconds of walking, but sure.

This is someone's home away from home. Just like yours.

TENT FLAP - The tent is just tarpaulin fabric covering a pile of stuff. The flap is open. Inside, three young men -- all in forward-looking apparel reminiscent of the sticker on the padlock -- are listening to some new form of music. It's like nothing you've ever heard. One of them looks at you.

ANDRE - "C'mon! Get in and close the flap behind you! The warm stuff is getting out!"

AUTHORITY [Easy: Success] - It's safe to assume this is their leader. Or at least he thinks he is.

Squeeze in.

"No way." [Leave.]

ANDRE - "Sorry." He points his thumb at the lieutenant. "We barely have room for one."

KIM KITSURAGI - "You go ahead, I'm too old for this..."

ESPRIT DE CORPS [Easy: Success] - I'm actually not, he thinks. I just dislike delinquents.

KIM KITSURAGI - "I'm sure you will feel right at home. I'll keep watch." He gestures for you to squeeze in.

TENT FLAP - You leave the lieutenant outside and squeeze in.

Smells like sweat and laundry detergent. Plus a trace of ether.

A pile of nasal sprays. Brand name: "Nosaphed Ultra."

Canisters filled with what appears to be water. The label says "Distilled."

A speaker. The big kind they use for live music.

ANDRE - You see a youngish man bleaching the tips of his hair with a toothbrush. He puts the toothbrush down and extends his hand in greeting.

"Hello, I'm Andre. It's a pleasure to meet you."

Shake his hand.

Don't shake it.

ANDRE - His grip is strong, sweaty, and warm. He's trying to project and inspire confidence.

"This is my posse: Noid...."

NOID - The young man with earrings looks at you suspiciously.

ANDRE - "...and Egg Head."

EGG HEAD - "Egg!" The tape player high above his head continues to blast what is probably *anodic* music.

ANDRE - "Together with Acele Berger -- who's out there right now, doing some *seriously* progressive sonic experimentation -- we like to think of ourselves as 'music venue organizers.'"

"Wait, how many music venues have you organized?"

"Why are you here?"

ANDRE - "We have many in the pipeline, officer."

2. "Why are you here?"

ANDRE - "You see, we've been all over Jamrock North, prospecting for real estate to establish a new venue in..."

EGG HEAD - "Also for talent!"

ANDRE - "Yes, thank you, Egg Head. And, while there is no shortage of raw, unfettered talent spinning tapes in Jamrock, we've had rotten luck with the real estate part."

NOID - "Place is a shithole."

ANDRE - "I apologize for my friend Noid's potty-mouth. *I* realize this is not how you speak to a police officer. He has authority issues."

"There's no need. The place is pretty bad."

"Next time, watch yourself."

"Was there something you wanted? Your friend Acele said there was a problem with the church."

ANDRE - "Oh, so you've met her? Good, good." He nods.

EMPATHY [Formidable: Success] - He's not as glad as he would like you to think. There is concern in his voice.

ANDRE - "Yeah -- it's a matter of occupied ecclesiastical property. I bet you've noticed the derelict hive of *narcomania* on the coast?"

VOLITION [Easy: Success] - An attempt to pander to your perceived conservative sensibilities. No person his age would ever use a word like *narcomania* with a straight face. Don't fall for it!

"Enough histrionics. What are you talking about?"

ANDRE - "I'm talking about the church. And I'm not exaggerating! Even a place of spiritual refuge can become a magnet for all sorts of *dopeheads* and *burnouts* if left unattended..."

EGG HEAD - "Dopeheads!"

NOID - "Burnouts!" He angrily spits on a screw, then starts cleaning it.

ANDRE - "Well, I'm sad to say, that's exactly what happened. Sad because we were just about to put Martinaise on the map with one of the maddest dance clubs in Jamrock -- no, strike that -- in Revachol..."

EGG HEAD - "Strike that -- the world!"

ANDRE - "And sadder yet because the dopeheads and burnouts holed up in there are *the worst* kind."

COMPOSURE [Easy: Success] - He leans back a little, watching you with a steady, serious gaze, letting you imagine just how bad those 'dopeheads' and 'burnouts' really are.

RHETORIC [Easy: Success] - Good. This calls for an *opinion*. You're an expert in those.

"I won't stand for narcomaniacs of any kind. No *narcomaniacs* on my watch." (Shake your head gravely.)

"I feel like you may be laying this on a bit thick. What's really so bad about these 'dopeheads' and 'burnouts'?"

ANDRE - "They're *spooky*."

"What exactly do you mean by *spooky*?"

"'Spookiness' is not a matter for police investigation."

ANDRE - "I was hoping you would be the judge of that, officer. All I can say is, their spookiness is the kind that keeps us from restoring this church into a community centre. And a place of spiritual refuge."

NOID - "Also, they don't heat or clean the building. Shit's gonna collapse."

EGG HEAD - "People just wanna spin tapes without them spookin' it up! Place has bad sines! No one can dance like that."

ANDRE - "Thank you, Egg Head..."

"So you're gonna look into it, right?" He turns to you. "It *should* be a police matter -- getting them out. Whatever spooky stuff they're doing, I'm sure it's not what the Ecclesiastes meant their property for."

"I'll look into it. Tell me more." (Get the task.)

"I'll make up my mind later. I have questions for you first." (Not now.)

"The police have more important things to do right now, kid." (Not now.)

Good news, kid. You're talking to the *premiere* member of the Remote Viewers Division. Of course we're looking into the spooky church.

ANDRE - "Alright, man!" He claps his hands enthusiastically.

New task: Help ravers start a nightclub

EMPATHY [Trivial: Success] - Andre is obviously very happy you took him seriously. The whole tent is. The boys exchange giddy looks.

"Acele told me Noid put the padlock on the door. Why?"

"Who exactly are these people inside the church?"

"You mentioned some kind Ecclesiastes own the church. Who are these Ecclesiastes?"

"I wanted to ask you about this tent full of equipment."

"That's all for now." [Leave.]

ANDRE - "I did ask Noid to install a measure against more drifters wandering in. It's a temporary fix. Just something to contain the situation."

NOID - "I had to do it in a hurry. Not my best work... But it should hold for a while."

"I need the key."

"How long have those people been locked in there?"

"Right. Other questions." (Conclude.)

ANDRE - "Of course. Noid, give the officer the key."

NOID - "Alright." The speedfreak dips into his belt pack and produces a yellow key. He then makes a sudden, cool-infused move, tossing it in your general direction.

[Reaction Speed - Medium 10] Be the Cool Cop. Catch the key as it flies toward you!

Let it fall to the ground, then pick it up. Like a normal adult person.

REACTION SPEED [Medium: Failure] - It's as if time has frozen somehow. You think you can *sense* the key moving in the air. Yeah, this is gonna be *way* cool.

Don't ruin the cool by overdoing it. Raise your hand in front of your face with minimum effort.

REACTION SPEED - Blam! Straight in the eye. Straight in the old eye-orb. In *the lookin' ball*!

-1 Health

A stabbing pain. Tears stream uncontrollably from your right eye.

"Ouch! Goddamn asshole... what is WRONG with you?! Can't you see I'm in PAIN now?!"

NOID - "Man, I'm super sorry. That was totally my bad, I got overexcited. Threw them too hard. I'm sorry."

EMPATHY [Easy: Success] - He looks like he's genuinely sorry he didn't throw them better.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry…" (Bend your face in *mockery* of his useless contrition.) "You almost *eye-murdered* me -- a cop! That's use of LETHAL FORCE!"

NOID - "I really am sorry, man -- just take this, okay?" He pulls out some black paper from his belt-pack.

PERCEPTION (SIGHT) [Easy: Success] - Wow! Looks like there's quite a lot there...

[anthonysstupiddailyblog]

Anthony's Stupid Daily Blog (802): Mon 27th May 2024

I managed to stay off the internet all day so I wouldn't have the results from AEW's Double or Nothing spoiled for me and I'm glad because the show I was treated to when I got home was a banger. Ospreay vs Strong was very hard hitting and fast paced as I expected. I know AEW gets a lot of schtick due to their unfocused creative, struggles to fill arenas, frivolous spending and having a man child for a boss but they have succeeded in giving Roderick Strong a smidgen of a personality so in my opinion it has all been worth it. Next we got the return of MJF who got a thunderous reaction from the live crowd. For some reason MJF wore HHH's 2001 denim jacket over leather jacket look. Hope he doesn't plan on continuing to follow Hunter's fashion choices because I don't relish the thought of seeing him with a handlebar moustache and bicycle shorts in two years time. Serena Deeb and Toni Storm both put in an incredibly impressive showing. I think with the right booking Deeb could go down in the history books as the female Bret Hart but sadly the fans weren't into her despite her strong performance here because Toni Storm is now a face by proxy. If they're going to build Serena up they need to have her feud and get key wins over fully fledged heels (would love to see her feud with Kamille). The FTW triple threat match between Jericho, Hook and Shibata was very entertaining. At one point a stocky man dressed all in black entered the ring and began pounding on Hook and Shibata with a trash can and for a moment I genuinely thought it was Jericho's old WCW bodyguard Ralphus until I remembered Ralphus was dead and it was revealed to be Bryan Keith who has now apparently alligned himself with Jericho and wishes to sit under the Learning Tree. Malakai Black and Adam Copeland had an very bloody and dramatic Barber Wire Steel Cage match. I was very much hoping that Black would win because he needs a big win over an established star but sadly Copeland won but not without paying a price. At one point Copeland climbed to the top of a steel cage and jumped off intending to hit an elbow drop but clearly panicked after jumping and landed on his fucking feet! It later transpired that he had fractured his tibia and will need surgery. Who the fuck okayed this spot? Serve and Christian had a very enjoyable WCW style match with lots of interferance and hullaballoo throughout. The finish came when Swerve hit Christian mid air with a House Call while he was trying to spear him. This match was good and the build was pretty entertaining I just wish this was the main focus of the pay per view rather than booking Swerve to be a middle of the card champion. the event concluded with Anarchy in the Arena which was a lot of fun and had a lot of jaw dropping moments such as Jack Perry's legs being lit on fire and Darby Allin being hung by his feet from a cable dangling from the rafters for what felt like an eternity (If I knew how to layer audio over video I would layer the sound of Stan from South Park's temporary step father Roy dangling from his clubhouse calling out "Hello? Sharon? Can someone get me down from here? This cerainly does suck right here…Sharon?" and send it to Botchamania

[amorremanet]

I got tagged by @a-mi-zivi

Rules: 1. Tell us your Top 10 characters from different fandoms. (…I limited myself to five, each. Except HP, because it was too hard. Dude, that was hard enough. All arranged alphabetically, not in order of preference or anything.)

2. Tag 10 people.

tagging: @bizeke @donttouchandrewminyard @derekslaura @gentlepromises @girlronanlynch @pansexualpoedamneron @gaylukeskywalkers @scarlettwitchery @saralanceing @bpdrussell & literally anyone else who wants to do it can just do it and blame me (and contrariwise, if I tagged you and you don’t want to do it, no pressure <3)

Community: Abed Nadir, Dean Pelton, Jeff Winger, Shirley Bennett, (my number five changes on a daily basis, usually between Troy, Annie, and Britta, but I can’t pick right now, so fuck it, I pick Annie Kim and Quendra with a QU)

DC: Cassandra Cain/Black Bat, Harley Quinn, Jason Todd/Red Hood, Jonathan Crane/Scarecrow, Pamela Isley/Poison Ivy

But honorable mention nods go to Dick Grayson/Nightwing, Koriand’r/Starfire, Raven/Rachel Roth, Renee Montoya/Question, Roy Harper/Speedy/Red Arrow, Stephanie Brown/Spoiler, Tim Drake/Red Robin, and Wonder Woman, and this list was hard for, “there are SO MANY CHARACTERS, THE FUCK” reasons.

And Sandman technically is a DC title, but whatever: Death, Delirium/Delight, Desire, Despair, and Dream/Morpheus of the Endless, tyvm

Good Omens: Adam “the Antichrist” Young, Anathema Device, Aziraphale, Crowley, Pepper (Pippin Galadriel Moonchild)

Harry Potter: Andromeda Black Tonks, Barty Crouch Jr., Cedric Diggory, Cho Chang, Hermione Granger, Kingsley Shacklebolt, Lavender Brown, Luna Lovegood, Pansy Parkinson, Percy Weasley, Remus Lupin, Zacharias Smith

Sirius Black and Severus Snape get to share honorable mention status because, even though they are actually in my top ten, I know that being on the same point would annoy the ever-living shit out of both of them. Which amuses me because I am easily entertained.

AlSev Potter and Scorpius Malfoy get to share a point because the ones I love are essentially headcanon, since my take on Cursed Child is, “*nods* Uh huh… that’s nice… I’m going to ignore like 99% of it, but okay, it’s nice”

Legit Honorable Mentions:

[this is where i’d list the Dumbledore family and Gellert but it’s Complicated and i can’t legit list them without needing to Discuss it, so let’s just not even bother today]

Bill Weasley

Charlie Weasley

Dean Thomas

Dolores Umbridge

(in a way where I absolutely despise her as a person, but I appreciate her presence in the story because she is, along with Barty Jr., the only fucking COMPETENT villain in the books.

Also, she’s the actual, “repulsive to the core but makes no excuses for it just like white male villains, does her own thing and fuck anyone who tries to stop her, self-determined and she has decided to be awful, feminist on a meta level where she’s terrible just to be terrible without any excuses being made for it” villain that so many people have tried to make out of Bellatrix, when…… lol no, Bellatrix is a total fucking joke, sorry ‘bout it.

Like, man, Umbridge sucks, but she enriches the story and presents an actual, credible threat that has any kind of internal consistency and isn’t just, “I read an entry on fascism in a children’s encyclopedia and made it an OTT cartoon caricature of itself and added some cult leader BS because of reasons or w/e, and named it Voldemort, lol” — I appreciate that, as a reader, even if JKR did it more by accident than anything)

Fleur Delacour

Gilderoy Lockhart

(I blame myself entirely for making up Kingsley/Lockhart headcanons and getting Defensive of him in the face of JKR’s ableism; I should’ve known better, because shit like literally always happens to me, but I did it anyway because I never fucking learn)

Harry Potter

Justin Finch-Fletchley

(……I have post-war headcanons. A lot of them. You probably don’t want to know them, though, bc they’re depressing as fuck)

Nymphadora Tonks

Parvati Patil

Regulus Black

Ron Weasley

Ted Tonks

Viktor Krum

and a whole bunch of characters who are basically headcanon because they are literally just names who do like one or two things and that's it

Hunger Games: Annie Cresta, Finnick Odair, Johanna Mason, Katniss Everdeen, Madge Undersee

Marvel: shit, I did this one last and I have to go to therapy, so this is basically, “the order in which they came to mind and I stopped at eight bc holy fucking SHIT, there are a lot of characters”  — Erik/Magneto, Kurt “Nightcrawler” Wagner (my small blue Catholic mutant son <3), Sam, Steve, Bucky, Natasha, Ororo, and I feel like I should list someone else, but anyone who knows my usual type knows that Loki is exactly my type and I was all but doomed to be Loki trash. Which I am. Whoops. Sorry for my choices.

Sailor Moon: Fiore (……from the “Promise of the Rose” movie. ……I love my gay glam rock alien son), Tenoh Haruka/Sailor Uranus, Tomoe Hotaru/Sailor Saturn/Mistress Nine, Tsukino “Chibi” Usagi/Sailor Chibi Moon/Wicked Lady/Princess Usagi Small Lady Serenity/etc., Tsukino Usagi/Sailor Moon/Princess + Neo Queen Serenity/etc.

Star Trek (DS9): Captain Benjamin Lafayette “the rest of Starfleet are a bunch of slackers, has YOUR captain become space Jesus and saved the entire Alpha Quadrant lately” Sisko, Elim Garak, Julian Bashir, Kira Nerys, Tora Ziyal

Kasidy, Worf, Jadzia, General Martok, and Ezri get honorable mentions because this list was really hard to even whittle down to FIVE, but.

Star Wars and, “Star Trek (Everything But DS9)” were vetoed as categories because picking was hard and I didn’t feel like it.

Steven Universe: Amethyst, Connie Maheswaran, Garnet, Lapis Lazuli, Peridot

Yuri On Ice: Christophe Giacometti, Katsuki Yuuri, Lee Seung-Gil, Phichit Chulanont, Victor Nikiforov

Bonus — My Own Novel(s) bc Reasons: (also done before running to therapy) Sebastian, Pete, Josie, Margot, Lucy.

[lugiepie]

Hello. I guess my first ask ever goes to you?

I found your tumblr thru looking up stuff in the male corrin tag bc:

I dabble in smash bros (read: I am effing terrible at smash bros because I just started playing a few months ago),

I recently found out that this random character is not only has DRAGON powers but also has both male and female forms, thus making me

intrigued. I am very, very intrigued about this Corrin fellow. (and I like their male form a tad more than their female form too)

So, since I saw a post that you made over two years ago about this character indicating you found out about then thru smash too, I'm wondering if you have any recommendations about finding out more about them. Because I've been looking at it for a few hours now and I'm mostly just confused.

Note: I know nothing about Fire Emblem. I'm not really attracted to anime stuff either -- the closest experience I have with it is pokemon (which I adore because of aforementioned DRAGONS and various other wonderful creatures) -- (sidebar: pursuing your tumblr for more info and seeing your various art stuffs has been an absolute pleasure. Love the sense of humor).

(Hopefully I did this asking thing right, XD)

oh my hello!!!! glad you enjoy my stuff :) always nice to know that i can make people smile

as for finding a corrin encyclopedia? that’s a loaded question- i’d say play all three routes of fe fates, but since you’re not into that stuff i’m gonna instead recommend fe warriors (the first not, not the “new hopes” one that’s coming out later). it’s a bravest warriors game just with fire emblem, and although it’s definitely got some flaws in the wake of its story, it’s overall a pretty satisfying “kill hordes of enemies” game in my opinion. the character interactions are all very genuine too, and the supports between characters are pretty funny at times. also quick note, corrin himself kinda breaks a lot of well established fire emblem rules such as a.) half dragon that can transform into a full dragon somehow b.) uses more than one plot device in his quest and c.) is generally written very inconsistently and makes very dumb decisions in context because of it, hence why a lot of people don’t like him in the fe community. i mean he is as close as you can get to a mary sue in terms of fire emblem protagonists.

honestly though, if you don’t feel like playing a whole game, just try to find blogs that have content that appeal to you. i don’t follow any corrin blogs in particular (i just follow the male corrin tag) because truth be told both the fire emblem and smash community in the west don’t have as much of a liking toward our favorite manakete as they do, say, alm or lyn. i know this sounds like a cop out answer lol but i swear curating this stuff yourself and not just going off of what a random person on the internet says is so much more enjoyable in the long run. on that note, maybe i’ll post more corrin stuff because we do be living in a desert here chief.

though, just a quick note, actual canon corrin is more of a totally submissive pacifist who is afraid of hurting people and basically everything, and the way i portray him is more like “his initial adventure from fates is already over and he learned the hard way that sometimes hurting people is an unavoidable consequence when you’re dealing with literal war”, so he instead is much more mellowed out. and a dog because i think it’s really funny to have this grown man with dragon wings and a tail jumping on counters and just causing general chaos without realizing it lmao.

and yes, there is no wrong way to do an ask :) you could’ve sent me a picture of an overflowing trash can with a raccoon in the background and i would’ve answered it in full, welcome to the hellsite that is tumblr

[leelee10898]

Louder: part 1

This takes place in the CGW AU, a collaborative universe by @ao719, @speedyoperarascalparty, @cocomaxley, @riseandshinelittleblossom and myself. You can find other works from our crazy universe HERE

This takes place before Genevieve and Rashads wedding. It is a follow up to Never give up (a one shot featuring Leo x Alicia) which was basically the birth of this crazy gang. It is very smutty you can find that HERE.

Rating: Mature, smut content inside

The five ladies stepped excitedly out of the suv, it was girls night and they looked forward to this night every week. Each of the girls took time picking and planning an activity, this particular week was Alicia's turn. "Ok girls, whos ready to get shit faced and paint?" She clapped her hands. "I'm ready to drink, but paintin, not so much. I had to paint a gold fish in middle school. It came out looking like an orange turd floating in the water." Stephanie said with a serious expression. The girls bust out laughing as they walked into the studio.

They each took a seat in front of an easel while an employee came around filling wine glasses. "Anitah took a look at the little bit of liquid in the bottom of the glass and spoke up. "Honey, these ladies and I are going to need alot more then this. I'll gladly pay you guys an extra $200 if you keep our glasses full." The employee nodded and took the cash filling the girls glasses up. An instructor stepped in front of the group. "Hello ladies, I am Gwendolyn and tonight we will be painting the Eiffel Tower in the spring time." She pulled out a painting with the Eiffel Tower in the distance, its reflection in watrr surrounded by chery blossoms. "Has anyone ever been to the effiel tower in the spring." She questioned. The girls all raised their hands. "I've had sex on the Eiffel Tower in the spring." Anitah whispered as she giggled. "Sir would you like to paint too? We have an extra seat?" Gwendolyn asked Brad. "No mam, I am here to observe." Anitah rolled her eyes "Brad, sit down and fricken paint."

"Yes, your grace."

Leo, Maxwell and Drake walked into the study joining Liam, Rashad and Bastien. "Who's ready to pay me?" Leo gloated. Drake rolled his eyes "Yeah ok Rhys, we will see who pays who." "Im glad I can join you guys this time, Stephanie is out with the girls and Savanah offered to watch Evie for us." Maxwell grinned as he grabbed a handfull of pretzels and sat down.

Several hands into the game the guys were feeling the effects of their drinks. Drake slid a large bet into the center "what'll it be boys?" Leo shot him a smirk. "I'll raise you. Go big or go home. That's my motto for poker and the bed room." He winked. Liam rolled his eyes "I fold, but im pretty sure we've already established I'm just as qualified to get the job done big bro." Liam gave him a sloppy grin. "Now boys, lets not forget who has double digits!" Drake sipped his whiskey, pleased with himself. Maxwell and Rashad each shared a look, remembering the night they played never have I ever after Maxwell and Stephanie's baby shower.

"Ok Walker, you have more O's, but when it comes to who can make them scream louder, I got that hands down." Leo gloated taking a long sip of his scotch. "You got jokes Rhys, I'm pretty sure Pam and I have got you beat in that department too."

"Now wait a minute, im petty sure Anitah has both of you beat there." Liam spoke up. "Genevieve, has a set of lungs on her, I'd be willing to bet she could give the ladies a run for their money." Rashad interjected. Maxwell giggled "My red is a firey, fiesty one, she is quite loud don't count her out." The five men stared each other down.

"Ok, since all of you think you have what it takes how about we put it to the test?" Leo looked back and forth between the men. "And how do you suppose we do this?" Liam arched hos brow. "The camping trip, this weekend." Drake said never taking his eyes off his friends. "Deal" the unanimously agreed as they sat back in their chairs. "Ahh guys? How do we tell who's louder? We'll need a judge." Maxwell stated, as their heads turned to face Bastien. "Not even an option fellas, I told you already, you're on your own."

The girls were about 7 bottles of wine in and feeling good. They had just about finished up their paintings when Anitah asked for another bottle to be brought out. "Um, this is the last bottle, do you ladies really need another?" Gwendolyn pleaded. "I am the queen of Gordon, bring me the bottle." She demanded. Gwendolyn nodded and returned a moment later refilling the girls glasses. "How you doing over there queen or Gordon?" Alicia snorted. "Greaaaaat! This thing is fucking awesome. How bout you guys?" Anitah slurred. " I like mine, mines pretty. Im gonna make Leo hang it in the bed room... I hope it doesn't fall off the wall though." Alicia giggled.

Pam held hers up in the air. "I'm done, its nothing special." Genevieve snorted "yeah your full of shit, its a damn masterpiece. Mine, well a five year old could paint better then this shit."

Stephanie placed a hand on Genevieves arm. "Nah girl your doin fine, bless your heart. This paintin's so ugly it'd make a freight train take a dirt road." She motioned to her work. Anitah topped her glass of again finishing off the bottle. "Shiiiit were outta wine. How you doing Brad?" Anitah giggled. "No worries, I brought back up." The ladies cheered as pam pulled put a bottle.

"Ah we dont allow outside alcohol in the studio." Gwendolyn spoke up. Anitah shot her a look. "Gwendolyn, Do you know who I am?" "Ah ye- yes your majesty." Anitah nodded "ok then, the bottle stays. Heres some extra cash for your troubles." Anitah smirked. Alicia pulled out her phone to take a picture accidentally calling Leo on video chat.

Leos phone rang Drake glanced down at the phone and snorted. "Hey Leo, sexy wifey is calling." Leo grinned as the others laughed. "A video call. She must miss my face." He pressed the button "hey baby having fun?" Only she wasnt looking at the screen. Leo could see the art studio, and hear the girls laughing. He heard Anitah ask Brad how he was doing over ther. "Anitah get down, your gonna hurt yourself." Alicia giggled. Liam came over behind Leo. "What are you watching?" His eyes went wide at the sight. Anitah walked over to the table in the center of the room and climbed up. She laid down on her side seductively and said "paint me like one of your french ladies." The girls laughed hysterically. The last thing they seen was paint fly across the room before the call ended.

"This is ridiculous!" Genevieve shouted in frustration as she tossed her paint brush, causing pink paint to fly across hitting Anitah in the face. Anitah gasped. "Gen, what the hell?"

"Ooops, sorry." Genevieve tried stifling a laugh but her attempts were futile. Anitah grabbed a paint brush and flung blue paint at Genevieve splashing across her cheeks and hitting Stephanie in the process. "Awe hell no." Stephanie grabbed a hanful of paint and flung it at Anitah. Alicia and pam looked on at the three, un touched by the paint filled fued until Alicia laughed and Anitah took a paint brush and smeared a line straigh across her chest. "You shouldn't have done that queenie." Alicia giggled as she picked up a bottle of purple pain and squeezed it on her head. Anitah squealed as the two started dumping paint all over each other.

Brad came running across the room "your majesty." His foot hit a puddle of paint and he fell on his ass, sliding across rhe floor leaving a brown streak across it. The girls laughed hysterically "looks like ole Brad left a skid mark." Stephanie howled.

Pam sat there drinking straight out of the bottle. "you guys done yet?" She groaned, a stream of blue pant splashed across the side of her head. "Oh, now you've done it." Pam jumped up and flung paint in all directions. The girls laughed and screamed until Gwendolyn came back into the room "what is going on here?" They immediately froze. "This concludes tonight's session, please get out!" She seethed. The girls took their paintings, and piled into the suv. Completely paint covered, somehow their paintings remained unscathed by the paint war.

Liam stood there jaw clenched "Bastien, please inform Brad to bring my wife home, immediately." " Yes sir." Bastiens phone rang as he stepped outside of the study. "Well, it seems the girls had fun." Leo chuckled. Liam shot him a look. "At least there wasn't anyone else there." Rashad tried to make light of the situation. Bastien entered the room "ah sir." "Yes Bastien. " liam sighed. "That was the art studio, it appears the girls have been banned." The men all turned to face Bastien. Liam ran his hand down his face "of course they have." "Theres more." Bastien continued "it also seems they caused some Damage and destruction of property."

"Bastien please inform the studio that we will cover all Damages, also please make them sign a non disclosure form." Bastien nodded and excited the room. "Damages? That doesnt sound like my Genevieve." Rashad defended. "My red is fiesty, but I cant see her trashing a place... Ok maybe." Maxwell shrugged. "Pam wouldn't do that, theres got to be more to this Li." Drake shook his head. Leo snorted. "We chose American women gentlemen. they're hot headed, hot tempered and hot blooded." "My queen has alot of explaining to do when she gets here." Liam exhaled with a clenched jaw.

Finally they heard a loud yelling coming from the foyer. "HONEY WERE HOOOOOME." Alicia screamed as the girls giggled. "There they are now." Leo chuckled.

The girls stumbled into the palace Anitah took off her shoes kicking them across the room, followed by her shirt. "I need a shower." Alicia kicked her shoes off and pulled down her jeans tossing them. "I need one too." Genevieve already had her shirt off and was working on her pants as they climbed the stairs. Stephanie and pam made short work of theor clothes tossing them aside as the five made their way to the royal Quaters.

"My showers the biggest, we can all get in there." She announced as the girls piled into the bathroom and stepped into the shower. "Mmm bop, do a dop a do oop do it up my doo op." Alicia sang. "Ew, did you say do it up your doo op?" Anitah squealed. "Thats not how the song goes." Genevieve laughed. "Oh yeah, you sing ot then. Ok. "Mmbop do a dop a do op do it up my doo op." Genevieve giggled. "See?!" Alicia laughed as the girls joined in singing very drunk and very off key.

The guys walked out of the study making their way to the stairs when they noticed several articles of clothing strewn about. "Well, looks like they're naked where ever they are. " leo smirked. "And covered in paint." Drake picked up a paint covered shirt "this is pams." The made their way towards the royal quaters when they heard the singing. The door was wide open. They walked in and heard the water running. They opened the bathroom door to find all five women crammed into the shower. "Jesus christ they're packed in there like sardines." Drake ran his hands through his hair.

"Heeey baby."Alicia turned to see Leo, her white bra and panties soaked, showing everything. Leo groaned at the sight adjusting his pants. "Why dont you come on out of there love." He smirked. "No! Were showering." Anitah hollered. "Anitah get out of there right away?" Liam demanded. "Are you angry, my king?" Anitah batted her lashes at him. "Anitah." He warned.

"Ok, Pam lets go." Drake opened the shower door he tried to reach in and grab pam but almost touched Genevieves ass. "Ahhhh, shit. Umm pam baby come here." Pam walked closer to the door when drake grabbed her tossing her over his shoulder, he tried to make a run for it but as he turned he slipped on the wet marble floor and fell on his ass dropping pam on top of him. "Shit baby, are you ok?" He held pam in her arms. Pam looked up at him laughing hard a loud snort escaped her. "Jesus, ok lets get you to bed."

Stephanie was the next to climb out, running right into Maxwell's arms. "Come on rose bud, lets go to bed." He took her hand.

Rashad walked over to the shower "Genevieve." He softly called her name "come on, lets go to bed." Genevieve giggled and climbed out of the shower "night ladies."

"And then there were two." Anitah giggled as her and Alicia danced around under the water. "Ok love, why dont you come with me and we can continue this shower together huh?" Leo gave Alicia that sly look that made her weak in the knees. She jumped out of the shower and into his arms wrapping her legs around him. "Anitah. Come on." Liam sighed. She shut the water off and climbed out. Liam gave her a towel "your angry my king." He shot her a look. "I am." Anitah bit her lip "good."

Liam walked with Leo to the door, Alicia placing kisses on his neck, completely oblivious to anything else. "I think I know just the judge for this weekend." Liam smirked. "Uh huh, jesus baby. Li, can you ah, get on with it." Leo groaned as Alicia continued to kiss his neck. "Brad."

Leo nodded his head and quickly took off. Liam turned to Anitah. "You my queen, you're in trouble. " Anitah squealed as Liam chased her through their quaters.

Tagging: @gardeningourmet @carabeth @bobasheebaby @scarlettedragon @annekebbphotography @speedyoperarascalparty @greyeyedsmile14 @stopforamoment @mind-reader1 @hopefulmoonobject @alicars  @katurrade  @indiacater @bella-ca @blznbaby @blackwidow2721 @liamxs-world  @simsvetements @furiousherringoperatortoad @choicesfannatalie @crookedslimecreatorpasta @coldcollectornight08 @museofbooks @syltti78 @ao719 @3pawandme @blubutterflyy @itsstillnotwhatyouthink @liam-rhys-x-mc-x-constantine @riseandshinelittleblossom @wannabemc2 @gibbles82 @editboutique @lodberg @zaffrenotes

@moneyfordiamonds @give-me-ernest-sinclaire @ooo-barff-ooo @tornbetween2loves @ownworldresident @perfectprofessorherokid @enmchoices

[amorremanet]

me: *mentally bouncing between composing stuff for my thesis about the social and political philosophical grounding for my ~*Aesthetic Descisions™*~ and why on earth Remus Lupin, Ursula the Sea Witch, vampires, Shakespearian gender &/or presentation-play, Sailor Moon, Oscar Wilde, Tiresias, my twenty-one years of marriage to Anakin Skywalker, the fact that, ‘he’s so pretty, he could almost be a girl’ was one of the highest compliments I could give a guy in high school (and I said it often about one, Hayden Christensen), The Iliad and why I hate The Odyssey and why I don’t actually have any love for most of The Aeneid itself but will fight people on it anyway because all the currently available English translations that I’ve read completely SUCK and ARE WRONG, Catholic hagiography, García Lorca, Frida Kahlo, Virginia Woolf, gay dragons, and the Rocky Horror Picture Show are all related, much less relevant, complete with an obnoxiously pretentious extended analogy to the popular anecdote that probably never really happened irl about Martin Luther nailing the 99 Theses to the local church door*

me (not even sixty seconds later): okay so having watched the first episode of season six of GOT, i can safely say that: 1. i am going to set everything that benioff & weiss love on fire (within reason. like, living beings are off limits and i might just take some of their stuff and keep it instead of setting it on fire. and i want to do this for a LOT of reasons but the big one currently is, “how very DARE you cast alexander siddig as prince doran and then waste him like you have, ur tacky and i hate u”); and 2. i would totally still hit it with melisandre if she was game for it, idegaf about that ending scene okay, if she’s game, i’m game, hi yes where do i sign up to put my name into consideration for this plz??

me (not even sixty seconds after that): *running down a mental tally of all the famous and/or fictional dudes i’ve ever thought i had any kind of crush on and trying to assess what roles compulsory heterosexuality, ‘he is a gender nonconforming gay-coded badass. …yes okay FINE, he is also EVIL AS FUCK but just wow look at that debonair motherfucker, i want to be like him but BETTER (which may or may not mean that i will still be a villain but i will learn from his mistakes oops)’ and about six or seven other factors played in all of these weird little fascinations*

me (not even two minutes after THAT): *finds self upside down and half-hanging off the couch and not entirely sure how to get out of this position without either falling over or being massively uncomfortable, because the dog got the better of me while we were playing tug of war with her rope toy*

[amorremanet]

on one hand, I want to make it my mission to love Eileen Prince more than anybody else does on the other hand, it occurs to me that there is not really a lot of competition in this regard, afaik, so this feels like underachieving ~*conundrummmmm*~

[amorremanet]

plan: finish babbling all over a meme response from five days ago THEN go to the pharmacy, pick up my meds, pick up a few things from Kroger, come home, and make dinner actual reality: …lol yeah uh, the only req's on this meme were, "pick between two ships" but then Miguel @solvola handed me an opportunity to show off just how totally headcanon trash I am for a character who doesn't technically have a canon personality, considering he's Laura Hale's vice-president at the, "dead chars who we know next to nothing about aside from their relation to living canon characters" club, and…… well. uh, I mean, I'm headcanon trash so I took that opportunity and then had to rush over to Target 15 minutes before the pharmacy closed and I got my meds but now I'm just sitting in my car in the Kroger parking lot, trying to figure out whether I'm forgetting anything I need to grab right now or not, and the thingy back at home is still not done. I want to say that it's close but I'm afraid of jinxing it. when I left, I was babbling in a footnote about a ship that is only tangentially related to the two ships Miguel actually offered up as part of the, "pick between these two" game — related due to taking Character A from A/B and Character C from C/D and shipping A/C a lot because I am headcanon TRASH, and character A is Scott so? I mean, come ON, that's just added incentive to be trash, really, because Scott just ships so well with basically everyone

[amorremanet]

me: i'm going over to the library around 3

me: this is a perfect plan

me: what could possibly go wrong

jacen solo: *enters, stage left*

me: ………oh jesus tap-dancing christ

jacen: *blinks at*

me: …OUT. get out. go. not now, you. go on, get.

jacen: *tilts head and smirks bemusedly*

me: I SAID *OUT*.

jacen: *smiles and moves to stand by my spot at the table*

me: i don't have time for this right now, jacen, and i super do not want you here, go away

jacen: *huffs like, "yeah right, you adorable little self-deluding liar"*

me: fuck off, jacen, i'm not in the mood

jacen: you're always in the mood and we both know it *stays put* :))))

me: ……hey wait, how'd you even get in here, you haven't been here in ages and who the fuck reinstated your old standing invitation to cross the threshold

jacen: *rolls eyes and SIGHS DRAMATICALLY*

me: invitation, jacen. who put yours back in place. who did the thing.

jacen: *shakes head in exasperation* okay, but REALLY. you know damn well that i'm *not* a vampire—

me: WHO. IN THE *FUCK*. REINSTATED. YOUR. INVITATION.

jacen: *sighs, then smirks at* you did :)))

me: …………*can neither argue nor deny this and knows it* FUCK OFF JACEN :|

jacen: make me. :)

me: okay, i'm gonna count to three and then you're going to leave. one…

jacen:

me: *two*………

jacen:

me: ………I FUCKING MEAN IT JACEN SOLO.

jacen:

me:

jacen: …two and a half? :)

me: ………………oh fuck off, jacen. i wish i knew how to quit you.

jacen: lol no you don't, who do you even think you're kidding

me: ………people. idk, just… y'know, PEOPLE.

jacen: kassie, plz. you were doomed as soon as you heard that they'd started drawing parallels between me and my grandfather and had to go look into it yourself

me: yes but that doesn't mean that i have to like how fucking trash i am for a well-executed fall to darkness storyline especially those that even tangentially involve any of my pre-extant fictional faves

jacen: like my grandfather

me: yes, like your grandfather. now go the fuck away, i'm busy and then going to the library

jacen: *pulls up a seat next to me* nah, i'm good :)

me: …………*sighs* fine, but don't be here too long, the library closes at six on Fridays, jerkface

jacen: yeeeeaaaah that sounds like a YP — "your problem" — not an MP, "my problem" :)

me: …………i hate you so much right now it isn't even funny

jacen: *starts idly flipping through one of my library books* of course you do, sweetheart. you keep telling yourself that as long as it makes you happy :)))

me: ………*grumbles something about, "fuck off jacen" and then quietly indulges in being trash*

[amorremanet]

“I once kissed a man who’d once been kissed by Lord Alfred Douglas.”

okay, in terms of, “top 10-15 best ways to open a ‘history of sex and sexuality and related subjects’ book/monograph,” this sentence is pretty much the winner.

[amorremanet]

oh my god, I am a completely horrible person …yes, I'm aware that this isn't news and that the way in which I'm being terrible right now is more or less completely precedented by all of my everything and several things I've done before but jesus god, I feel like a hot mess for even thinking these thoughts I am thinking and I'm just like??? ……dammit, can someone please pretend to be surprised by the fact that I'm having Ideas that involve sad feels, Scott McCall, and being trash by making people feel Sad Things about Scott McCall and refusing to write the ship I'm feeling for this idea in a happy kind of way because I'm terrible except that you're gonna pretend like you don't know this right now? please? …please? pretty please. please just pretend like we don't already know I'm sad feels trash af and like, uh… pleeeeease? all you have to do is pretend to be shocked? *eyelash flutters???*

[amorremanet]

me: *reads a suggestion for posts readers want to see more of at a kink-specific "imagine your OTP" blog* me: *immediately starts trying to reconfigure a Skittles idea I've had recurring Notions about for a year or so because eee, I have a thing I could share!!* me: *takes like fifteen minutes to remember that — oh. just, uh… ohhhhh. right. that idea was so completely sad though and definitely not what said readers are looking for because it meets the requirements but not in a way that's actually getting the spirit of things, uhhhhh* me: *shifty faces and scuttles away*

[amorremanet]

"the question isn't whether or not I'm going to do a petulant unnecessary questionable thing. the question is: a. how do I best force myself to write porn & b. which combination(s) of Boyd, Danny, Isaac, and Camden does Scott get to have sex with this time" - me, being shipper trash & crit failing at adulthood, as usual

[amorremanet]

I'm sitting here at my spot, watching the Disney "Hercules" because I only made it like 5-8 minutes into a Glee episode that I legit only got my hands on for kink fuel, Mercedes having a solo, more kink fuel, and because I actually really like the Kurt + Bow-tied Hobbit duet of "Love Is A Battlefield"

and the two bigger reasons why I couldn't handle the whole thing rn are that: a. ……oh my GOD, Glee isn't even trying to be based in any kind of reality that looks a little like ours and I can't it's just really fucking funny to me omg

and b. ………I am a terrible person and I'm thinking dirty kinky thoughts about Porcelain, Hobbit, and Hobbit's Mysterious Older Brother Who Looks Like Matt Bomer, in conjunction with the kink fuel things in this episode and oh my god, I'm pretty sure Jesus would just go, "yeah uh, I'm not sure what I can do about this to help you at this point, just don't be a dick and try to manage it, I guess? :/"

(the ships in said dirty gutter trash thoughts are Blaine/Cooper and Cooper/Kurt because I am fucking traaaaaash. but oh fuck me gently, now I'm thinking about Pezberry things in this vein too and oh my god someone please save me from myself

or at least, like… walk on my back until it doesn't hurt anymore? that's a good idea too)

[amorremanet]

so i was headcanoning laheycest the other night with a bottle of wine ...[redacted]... and that's how i ended up crying underneath a dumpster which oddly enough showed how i am actually BELOW trash

(context: I originally wrote this answer before I passed out last night/earlier this morning, which is why its kind of a mess but I wanted t preserve that)

okay i’m pretty much answering this and then passing out for the night before i nod off on the table BUT OMG so i have two basic reactions to that:

“omg tho that sounds like heaven do you mind if i come join you with some orange juice or some pepsi or something???? i wanna sit underneath a dumpster and headcanon laheycest with you :DDD”

“……does it make you feel better if i tell you that i’ve been writing a headcanon post re: Laheys for you since, like, a couple days after Christmas, and i got distracted from finishing it in the first place…… because i started reading a book i got from my parents as part of answering the ask you sent that started this and then one thing kind of led to another and then it was April???”

…I don’t even remember what all the content of this post was but so much more happily HI YES HELLO I WANT TO COME JOIN YOU IN THE TRASH BUCKET CLUB ♡♡♡♡♡♡♡ (also i’m sorry if you’d rather i hadn’t posted it and i’m still gonna go crash now but i can take it down later if you want?? ♡)

(i really need to crash before i start going, “dude, though. if we had a tumblr network based on being rarepair trash or ‘characters who are so minor that they’re basically entirely headcanon’ trash or similar… would anyone else actually join? or would it mostly be us sitting by the dumpster with some wine and moonshine sangria, crying about codependent Laheys and stuff??”)

added as of now: …even after having slept and stuff, I’m not really convinced that the Teen Wolf trash network is a bad idea. I have no idea what kind of trash to base it around or anything but I’m not sure it’s a bad notion tbh