#my dad

[jenjen4280]

It’s lesbian visibility week. In general, I haven’t been very visible lately on this blog because my Dad died (fuck cancer).

Warning: Long post. TLDR - my Dad was a great Dad and a good man.

Prior to that, I was spending a lot of time with him and Mom, helping as best I could. And afterwards, spending time with Mom getting everything done that needs done.

The Hot Wife has been at home, keeping everything going there and providing a lot of love and support.

My Dad was from the Silent Generation (the one before the Boomers). Unlike most people his age, he never stopped learning, growing, and adapting to the changing times. He believed in equity and justice not because he was “woke,” but because it is the right thing to do and he participated in civil rights protests in the 60s.

He taught me how to throw a ball and was always up for a game of catch.

He shared his love of folk music, classical music, science fiction, existentialism, art, and weird cult/art house/foreign films with me.

When I came out, he apologized for the times when he and Mom told me to act more like a girl, while encouraging me to be myself and grow up as a tomboy. He would buy fireworks for me and martial art supplies so my bff and I could terrorize the neighborhood in our ninja suits every summer night and a few other nights too.

He always bought boxes of candy for Mom, Seester, me, and my girlfriend on Valentine’s Day.

He randomly showed up at the Baltimore Gay Pride Festival one year (the year I wore my fav t-shirt that said “let go of my ears, I know what I’m doing”), and for many years after we went to Pride together.

We gossiped about our celebrity crushes together.

He refused to take my Mom shopping at Hobby Lobby and refused to eat at Chick-Fil-A.

He was so happy when I married the Hot Wife and he loved her too.

I didn’t know this until I cleaned out his desk - he had been donating to the Human Rights Campaign Fund for years and he had a few different clippings from magazines and downloads from the internet about how to challenge transphobes.

I didn’t just lose my Dad, we all lost an LGBTQ+ ally, a voting Democrat, and an example of non-toxic masculinity.

Good-by, Dad. Easter pizza dinner won’t be the same without you.

[vampryn]

nine inch nails at woodstock '94 by joseph cultice

[dragon-in-a-fez]

incomplete list of fun stories about my dad:

at uni he and half a dozen of his friends stole a half-ton stone statue of a lion from another college, got it on a barge, and hoisted it up under London Bridge where it was found hanging the next morning

my mother and I once lost him at Trafalgar Square and he told us later he was just sitting on top of the plinth of Nelson's Column waiting for us. we never found out how a 55-year-old professor who barely ever went outside scaled a 6 metre bronze relief of the Battle of the Nile or why he thought we would look for him up there

he worked for the UN for a while and ended up in Prague on a research trip in the '60s. within three hours of landing he'd ditched his government handler and found his way to an underground anti-Soviet resistance speakeasy

he was raised Catholic. when the Vatican came out against the birth control pill he formally left the church but only after screaming "all you care about is controlling women" at his priest in public and sending the Pope a personal hate letter

when I emailed him to tell him I had started seeing a nonbinary person he wrote back with a six-paragraph rant about how much understanding of the wondrous variety of human experience had been denied to his generation

he got invited to an event at Buckingham Palace back in the '80s and responded with a letter addressed directly to the Duke of Edinburgh saying he might try and make it if he didn't have anything to do at work or anything he wanted to watch on TV that day

one time I was on a bus with him and he saw someone he thought was doing a cosplay but he was very wrong and basically went up to a stranger who was out having a perfectly normal time and complimented her on looking like a robot assassin

he started a formal debating society in his nursing home without any of the staff knowing about it

[kedreeva]

My dad came to babysit Bug while I was packing up stuff in my bedroom for a renovation. He's never made friends with one of my birds before, but she came right over and laid on him and wanted pettings.

[gothiccharmschool]

Everyone join me in wishing happy birthday to the man who has always encouraged and supported my weirdness, my DAD!

One of the ways he encouraged my weirdness: he read Ray Bradbury's short story The Homecoming to me when I was 6 or 7; he said that he wanted me to know my people existed.

[murderofravens]

i am very normal about him btw i'm not at all insane i'm very sane and normal. and not atall insane i'm normal i'm normal i'm normal i'm normal I NEED HIS BIG FAT WET COCK TO PUNCTURE A HOLE THROUGH MY THROAT PLEASE

[that-bitch-kat3]

nothing freak me out more than the fact that sirius black and MY FATHER were born in the same year.

[fioreofthemarch]

Hylia be praised, he lives

[sparrow-the-tired-lesbian]

“You gotta know what you’re worth then add tax.” - My dad

[auroranekai]

Trotting together through the fields of stars

Happy birthday dad ❤

Wish you were still here so we could celebrate it with you.

[lifblogs]

I SAW AO3 UP ON MY DAD’S PHONE!! HE’S AT THE DEVIL’S SACRAMENT. I SAW HIM AT THE DEVIL’S SACRAMENT!!

[greenbergsays]

I’ve been trying to write this original thing for a couple of weeks now but I started second-guessing myself in week 2 and that means I’ve just been stalled since then, so I decided to ask my dad some vague questions to see if his answers would get me out of this dumb cycle

But then I was like, “Okay, but do I start with the torture or the escape,” and he’s like “...what story is this??” 

He knew already that I was trying my hand at an m/m romance so when I told him it was that one, he said, “you have piqued my interest in this story.”

I don’t think he realized these kinds of stories could have torture subplots, which is silly because HOW DO YOU GET THE HURT/COMFORT OTHERWISE

[sprout-222]

He's so 🤏

[kleefkruid]

Thinking about when my dad called in the morning and I just picked up not realising it was a videocall, bc my dad has a 10 year old phone with an aprox. 3 pixel camera and I didn't know he knew what videocalling was up until this point. Luckily I had it pointed at my head, because I was still in bed nude with my partner (who he hadn't met or spoken to by the way)

So I just go "Oh! Hallo papa.... this is Danny?" and I just point the camera in their face and they do a little wave. And my dad, entirely unperturbed goes "Oh, hallo Danny! I found out I can do video conversations with this thing. I wanted to show my shell collection" and he turns the camera to the top of a long kabinet, on which lie a few hundred shells he has collected from the beach, all sorted by type and then size in perfect neat rows. "This one is pretty rare, only found one complete one yet! Come look at them sometime, Danny can come if he wants to. Anyway, goodbye Zoet! Goodbye Danny!" and then he hung up.

Undeniably hilarious but also heartfelt. Love is in the infodump. And in the rare shell you should come visit (and your dad also) (danny is welcome too) (I love you)

[korneplod228]

[druggeddraccus]

my dad has found cosmere memes