#how much i love dain lol

[lilidawnonthemoon]

[ansy-tea]

SCREAMING CRYING LET'S GO OMG IT'S MY HUSBAND IT'S GENSHIN'S BEST BOY + KAEYA WHO IS ALSO AMAZING OMG OMG LETS GO LET'S GO I FINALLY HAVE SOME FOOD AFTER MONTHS OF BEING DAINSLEIF-LESS LET'S GOOOOOO–

[cerealmonster15]

The music in genshin impact is so good 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 I love the live symphony performances they do ‼️‼️‼️‼️ I’m listening to the Fontaine one and I just know that land is gonna make me go bonkers bananas with he hints of themes + the trailer + characters and outfits we’ve seen + the EVENT + music 🕺🕺🕺🕺🕺

[dutybcrne]

Watching JJK0 again, and like

What if. What if Dainsleif, hyped up on and tainted by Abyssal energy, pulled a Yuta a lil bit and accidentally/unknowingly cursed a dying Halfdan to be a lingering spirit attached to him in his desperation, mostly dormant but manifesting when Dainsleif is in most peril and brutally slaughtering any Abyssal creatures that go near him, sometimes being a danger to people Dain is unconsciously suspicious of/startle him, and it isn't until The Chasm when they get their closure ( along with Halfdan being able to reunite with his body ) that he is finally able to break that cursed bond and pass on-

[hellsitedotcom]

### Genshin Men & How They Kiss ###

Featuring Dainsleif, Il Dottore, Il Capitano, Neuvillette, Wriothesley, Al-Haitham.

warnings: shouldn't be anything too spicy/nsfw. Dottore bites people, do with that what you want.

english isn't my native language! this is going to flop so bad, but I'm bored; bone app the teeth.

DAINSLEIF

He is someone who - in my humble opinion - kisses you with such...devotion, such unwavering and suffocating devotion that it leaves you breathless and stunned even after the 100th kiss.

Dain has his way with words, we all know that, and as mesmerizing as his compliments and confessions can be, so are his kisses; they are like a beautiful, life-changing poem that leaves you aching for more.

He's not too frequent of a kisser, though - I want to think he's somewhat dramatic with his timing for kisses; before depatures, big battles, when you're apart from each other for longer times & greater distances.

Definitely one for goodnight kisses; he's such a gentle lover, I'd say. There's just something about him that makes it hard for me to see him as an aggressive, obsessive, or extremely passionate/intense lover (I hope you know what I mean).

You know those Princess x Knight stories? Where they finally have that first kiss, and it's described like something straight out of a fairytale? That's Dainsleif, basically. Also, definitely someone who kisses your hand/palm.

IL DOTTORE

Oh, he's a freak, alright. My ''aroace Dottore'' headcanons aside, he's...not your ''typical'' guy, I'd say. Well, he's not a romantic, I think we can all agree on that.

Dottore's kisses are most definitely possessive - they aren't there to show love or anything, but to claim - to ''mark his territory'', sorta.

I think he'd see ''kissing'' as an outlet of sorts; I don't necessarily see the ''real'' Dottore as someone who gets frustrated and lets it out on his lover, nor would he be someone to kiss his lover unprovoked, I think. He doesn't necessarily need it.

If we were to talk about a not-so-sociopathic Dottore (alias, a normal human), he wouldn't necessarily strike me as someone who thinks about kissing you much either. He gives me a rather uninterested vibe in that regard; he probably shows his love/devotion in different ways.

Maybe I'm just really biased because of my other headcanon; he just doesn't care about kisses in a romantic sense, that's it. He'll bite you, he'll devour you, but there's nothing more behind it but exerting power...or maybe he just wants to silence you, because your provocations/teasing is getting on his last nerve.

His kisses (I honestly just see him as a biter) are bruising, and the way he holds onto you during that time leaves bruises, too. And, again, not many of these actions stem from love, but possessiveness or to ''make a statement''.

IL CAPITANO

Initially thought was ''Does he even know what a kiss is'', but let's brush past that...anyway, why can I see him somewhere inbetween the likes of Dain & Dottore? lol

He's not much of a kisser, either. Which, uh, soldier and all, I'd say, but then, he is still capable of care and devotion in a way that others never could.

He's devoted in his kisses, and there's a pledge of loyalty behind each kiss, only solidified by their rarity. He swears fealty to you in that way - a firm, classy kiss on the lips; kissing the back of your hand while kneeling in front of you; a lasting kiss on your forehead before he departs.

Again, those kisses are rare and kept secret from the outside, but they exist and they hold such an incredible weight to themselves; they are his greatest show of vulnerability and weakness. Though, he does not view having a lover as a weakness.

As mentioned further above: His kisses are firm, they are lasting. He doesn't just give you quick pecks in passing, no. Each kiss takes its time, and each kiss is there to repeat the message the first one gave ''I swear fealty to you''. They aren't overly passionate, messy, or anything like that.

Definitely not one for many words, and their all pretty cordial and like some devoted rule-abiding knight would talk, lol. Quality Time and Acts of Service are more of his strongsuit.

NEUVILLETTE

I'm a bit torn here, though he certainly is a gentle kisser. On one hand, I want to say it is a ''lack of experience'' in that prospect, that could make him more hesitant and careful. On the other hand, I just feel like regardless of his experience level, he'd be a gentle lover.

He's more frequent in his kisses - he does not mind showing you love, regardless of where you are, though during important meetings (or trials) you'll never find him kissing you; only afterwards, when you've returned to the privacy of his office, he'll drop that mask again.

He'll pour all his emotions into his kisses - including those tragic, painful emotions after certain trials. Yet, his kisses are never hungry or aggressive. They'll still always keep their lightness.

Most of the time, you'll find him kissing your lips or your cheeks. In your sleep, he'll press a kiss to your forehead, and in public he'll often press a kiss to the palm of your hand.

His kisses are the kind to make you giggle, or smile all giddy. They are exciting, in a way. Though rather light and ''brief'', they leave you at a loss every time; like a beautiful dream. Paired with that soft smile of his? They'll have you melting right then and there.

WRIOTHESLEY

I just let out the most concerning ''hehehehe''; anyway, oh boy, I wanna be indulgent here, but I'll try to be as ''realistic'' as possible.

He's...a wildcard, of sorts. Wriothesley can be extremely passionate & hungry when it comes to his lover, but he can also be more classy & gentle about it, depending on different factors.

Now, focus on the more intense parts of Wriothesley. For anyone needing a visual/example; I'm sure there's fics out there where the reader is sparring with Wriothesley. And that's where I get the more intense version of him from.

He's the kind to pin you against a wall and devour your lips, tongue eventually down your throat as he got you at his mercy. He's not holding back with those kisses - he's hungry; hungry for all of you. His kisses aren't necessarily bruising, but they are suffocating; you'll be struggling for air when he is like this.

You'll find him his filled with desire only in private - and often enough there's something needed to trigger this...almost primal?...version of him; yes, this means he'll leave marks, but he'd never intentionally hurt you to get off.

On other occasions, he's more gentle, though that gentleness can sometimes stem from an absence of mind, too. Fleeting kisses on the cheek, barely sparing you a glance as he's too busy with work. His ''apology'' kisses are also the gentle, yet firmer kind. And you'll get them quite frequently, given...everything.

In conclusion, he's definitely capable of being both extremely hungry/intense and being gentle; it really depends on preference, I suppose, but I can absolutely see him being a perfect balance.

AL-HAITHAM

Definitely more on the calmer side; not necessarily ''gentle'' in the way I have described before, but he's not an aggressive/hungry kisser, unless for certain occasions, maybe.

He's so introverted in his voicelines, he's probably the same with a lover; barely any PDA in public, just because he's not a fan of it (you'll maybe get a peck on the cheek or a kiss on the forehead, but just fleeting).

His kisses are...somewhat distant, quite often. He'll kiss you on the lips, but you'll feel like he's not really present while kissing you. He'll also take your hand and kiss it absently whenever you sit beside him while he's studying.

Other times, he's nearly obsessed with kissing you; he'll be kissing you firmly, one kiss lasting minutes before being interrupted by shorter and lighter kisses, and then he'll go back to a firm, passionate kiss. He'll often have you on his lap during those.

Slow, sensual make out sessions. That's what I was looking for, I think. Lots of cuddling, holding you close, tracing his lips over your skin. That's how I see him sometimes.

Can I actually see him be more intense in his kisses? Maybe, but it takes a lot. A lot of pent up frustration, Kaveh getting on his last nerve, some issues with the Akademiya, etc.; and perhaps, if you provoke him on that day, you'll see a more hungry side...Or maybe he just did it to satisfy you for a while, who knows?

Makes me believe that Al-Haitham does not mind being more dominant, more intense, more hungry during make out sessions - he can if it means you'll be happy about it, but he doesn't prefer it, tbh.

[somewhere-in-the-rain]

With trembling hands, I unfold the paper—and smile. Xaden Riorson wrote me a letter.

I have no words to describe how much I love that Xaden wrote letters to Violet.

It’s such an out of character thing for him to do, which is proof of how much he cares about opening up to her. A letter is something that takes time and energy to create, not something done as an afterthought or in a hurry. I can imagine him sitting at his desk in Samara, getting lost in writing, just thinking about Violet and how he can show her that he cares.

There’s nothing remotely dangerous in it, no secrets of the revolution or clues on how to help, but it’s not like he can risk those by putting them in writing. No, this is even better. It’s just about him.

This is what people who think Violet is being unreasonable in Iron Flame missed. When she says she doesn’t want him to keep secrets from her, this is what she means. Of course she also wants to know things about the revolution and after she can shield Dain out she deserves to be told. But what she wants more is to know about Xaden. She was angry with him for not telling her about Cat and their betrothal and the deal with her mother. When they agreed to stop keeping secrets, the first thing she asked him was about his mother. Violet understands that he can’t tell her everything about the revolution. She is desperate to know him. She loves him.

It also shows Xaden’s character growth throughout the series. In Fourth Wing asking “why are you being weird” (lol) when Violet asked him questions, to writing letters to her unprompted in Iron Flame. I know I’m often critical of Xaden’s actions in Iron Flame, but he is trying.

That’s what I love about Xaden’s letters. In Basgiath when they were falling in love, there was barely any time for them to really get to know each other. The letters are like the fantasy equivalent of them going on dates. A piece of normalcy in the chaos of war and rebellion.

[skyfallscotland]

Ok so Rebecca did a one hour panel today in Sydney with Lynette Noni hosting, where she asked questions and then they opened it to fans. I've kind of summarised the things I haven't seen mentioned over and over, but I don't frequent the subreddit anymore or use TikTok, so there might be overlap. In any case, it's long. Settle in. I've sectioned it into plot/character relevant first, then themes and interesting facts about her and her writing. Basically, you all came with me. 💗

• In book three (and every book thereafter) we'll be going to more and more new places. She specifically worded it as "watching the map expand" whether that's significant or not, I don't know. (I was thinking Isle Kingdoms for OS, but maybe that's just my wishful thinking).

• She implied Jack will have a reason (explained) for uh...being a power-hungry prick? lol

• She's hella defensive of Dain, which I love. #DainApologistsClub 😌 Some highlights include:

"You guys give Dain so much shit for the same thing Xaden does. You really do and you're so fast to forgive Xaden and not Dain. Why? Is it because he's hot?"

And, "when push comes to shove, all Dain did—yes he violated her boundaries, as does Xaden—but all he did was trust his dad when his best friend no longer spoke to him. That's it."

"When Dain looks at her (in the interrogation chamber) and says 'if you had just told me, none of this would have happened', he's not just talking about the interrogation, he's talking about Liam, he's talking about if she had just trusted him (in Fourth Wing) it never would have happened." 😢

• She was asked about Liam's appearance in the interrogation chamber and definitively put to rest any signet theories involving that. "She's so alone in that moment and...I don't read fan theories but sometimes they reach my ears; she's completely disconnected from her magic in that moment, she can't even reach out for Tairn or Andarna, which are the bonds that are actually most important to her. She can't reach out for Xaden. And that's the one person who would have prevented that from happening the last year, so it's natural that's who her mind would summon."

• She's thought about a spin-off series, but she's just trying to survive this series.

• Someone asked her if there'd be any redemption and romance for Jack Barlowe and honestly, thanks guys, I don't think she's ever coming back to this country 💀 ("Are you getting enough sleep? Uh...I mean, from his prison cell maybe? No.")

• Someone asked "what is Garrick's signet and why hasn't it been shown yet?" (shoutout to this girl, she's the real MVP) to which Rebecca said "it's very much in book three, I love it."

• Someone asked about the orange dragons and unpredictability re: Amber, Jack, Varrish and then Imogen and Brennan. Rebecca said some dragons might look for traits like their own and some look for balance because it's a partnership; and that Brennan as a strategist needed that little bit of unpredictability in his life (lol, I think he got it).

• She didn't always plan for Violet to have two dragons. Originally it was going to be one (Tairn) and the editor had hoped that she would sway towards a weaker, smaller dragon and she thought that was a little too close to Abraxos in ToG, and so they compromised and gave her both. She also went on to say she doesn't like overpowered heroines and since Tairn is extremely powerful, Andarna balanced that out. (I'm not...I'm not sure how that works out? But that's what was said.)

• We are definitely going to find out more about the original six (and Lynette asked if that was a spin-off possibility and was shushed, so she's thought about it at least, but I get the idea she's thought about a lot of possibilities 😂)

• There's no timeframe for the release of the final two books.

• Someone asked if Violet's dad was Malek to which she was kind of shocked. He's not a god, guys. And low-key I JUST WANT TO KNOW HIS NAME. 😤

• On Sgaeyl: "You do (get more of her) but holy crap is she pissed. So—I'll tell you that about Onyx Storm—she is really, really mad at Xaden and she's not exactly speaking to him at the moment. So it's hard for her to speak into that bond when she's not speaking to him." 💔

• She was asked about the Violet dated Halden theory (which was fucking hilarious because the poor girl misspoke and asked if Xaden dated the prince and we were all really confused about which TikToks the poor thing had seen (note to self: consider cam/xaden), anyway after we got to the bottom of that, Rebecca replied, "I think you should read the third book." Which I'm taking to mean, the man is making a damn appearance and we're gonna find out for ourselves 👀 Hey, if I'm lucky maybe we'll even find out his surname

• Finally she said she has EP on the Amazon series, they've all been exceptionally protective of it and that she's happy with how it's going (they're not near casting yet and she doesn't want to really comment on that ever, to leave each role open to as diverse a cast as possible). She said the production team has come to the signings in LA to meet readers and see what they love and are passionate about when it comes to the series to make sure that's honoured.

"Like I mean, I've seen certain...like what can I say without getting tackled to the ground? Let's just say they've already taken steps to make sure that what you guys love about the story is envisioned and that it's not run amok. And I'm very happy with it, they're super protective of it." Which could just be me reading into it, but the first place my brain went was the dragons 👀🐉 and the CGI or whatever.

• She was asked about where the inspiration for the universe came from and she said that when her Entangled decided they were going to do romantasy they asked her for five pitches and Fourth Wing was one of them (she won't say what the others were because she might still write them someday). She said she likes the fated mates trope but she wondered what that would look like if the dragons were the ones mated, not the humans and the humans who couldn't stand each other were forced to be around each other because of this. 

• Her first ever book was romantasy but it didn't sell

• She's never really written enemies to lovers before.

• She likes found family themes because she was raised in a military family and moved around a lot, so that makes it hard to keep in touch with your extended family, and after she married her husband and became a military wife, it was their found family that was there for her—it was her found family who helped her move her house, who sat with her when her husband was injured in Iraq, etc, so she thinks it's very important to show that your family is also the people you choose and that can be just as strong as any blood tie.

• She was asked (by Lynette) why she wanted to show death and the reality of war and she said, "I've been surrounded by it. My husband's been at war since 2003, he spent 22 years in the army, first as a 19 Delta cavalry scout and then ten years as an apache pilot and we buried our friends. And I saw what it did to him, and I saw what it did to our friends, I saw what it did to our children, to us, and I love being able to examine it from a fantasy perspective just because I think fantasy gives us a unique environment from which to critique our own world by viewing it through the lens of another. And I've always delved into those themes as to why we do this to each other and where is there hope to stop it?"

• As an author her favourite scenes in Fourth Wing were the dagger stealing scene (very important to their chemistry and romantic development—"she's the only person he's taught ever, how to actually kill him") and the first kiss scene.

In Iron Flame it was the interrogation scene and how that ends with Dain and Xaden and everything coming together.

When asked about a similar scene from Onyx Storm that elicited the same strong emotion from her she said "you're not gonna like it" and that's it 💀

• She would consider writing fantasy again after she's done with the Empyrean world, maybe one of her other pitches, but she won't truly think about it until she's survived this one.

• She spoke about the "kill your darlings" writing advice and how if you love a scene but it doesn't move the plot, you've gotta cut it, and how she did that with the final scene in Fourth Wing, which was originally 7k words of Violet POV pulling information out of Xaden.

• When asked about fan theories she actually said something I found a little sad. "I don't listen to fan theories. One, I'm not on TikTok—it's a little bit more important for me to be alive than to listen to what other people think they know about me, and two, I don't ever want fan theories to bleed into my writing."

〰️ And that's it! If anyone's going tomorrow, please voice record the whole thing and report back lmao 🙏 🫶🏼

ETA: part two is here, x

[darlingod]

I love the way + how different Jude and Cardan are when they speak and express themselves and how it shows in these two confessions especially. (also I <3 that both statements were denial proof lol cause dear gawd finaLLY—)

“I love you. I first started liking you when we went to talk to the rulers of the low Courts. You were funny, which was weird. And when we went to Hollow Hall, you were clever. I kept remembering how you’d been the one to get us out of the brugh after Dain’s coronation, right before I put that knife to your throat. After I tricked you into being the High King. I thought once you hated me, I could go back to hating you. But I didn’t. And I felt so stupid. I thought I would get my heart broken. I thought it was a weakness that you would use against me. But then you saved me from the Undersea when it would have been much more convenient to just leave me to rot. After that, I started to hope my feelings were returned. But then there was the exile—I hid a lot, I guess. I thought if I didn’t, if I let myself love you, I would burn up like a match. Like the whole matchbook.”

Jude: I love you (and this is why) (essay)

“It’s you I love. I spent much of my life guarding my heart. I guarded it so well that I could behave as though I didn’t have one at all. Even now, it is a shabby, worm-eaten, and scabrous thing. But it is yours. You probably guessed as much. But just in case you didn’t.”

Cardan: I love you (with my entire stupid fucking heart)(poem)

[ixiot-ghostrebel]

Hey I hope you have a great day.

So I just saw the post with the wrath of the creator on Azar and I had an idea.

I am very emotional and I bailed my eyes out when I did the chasm quest with xiao and he nearly died AND I got a sad cutscene of the adepti after so my traveler was just stuck in the dialog with Xiao while I was crying a whole waterfall and sniffing really loudly and the only other quest where I had that was when we were in the chasm with dain and he tells us that the hillichurls are cursed people from Khanri'ah. I stood in front of the corpses and cried heart out.

So I wanted to ask the characters reactions to that. Especially Xiao, the archons we know (because khanri'ah and its destruction is a big thing here) and dainsleif.

I'm sorry this got so long. If you want to change something or want to add someone or take a character out it's okay, this is just my 5 am thought I just had.

Alr, Anon! Coming right up! Imma just focus on the Perilous Quest lol-

Creator Having A Meltdown During Perilous Quest

(Warning: Might Be OOC & Spoilers to the Perilous Archon Quest!)

Yelan

She wasn't going to lie, she wasn't expecting you to cry your heart out so freely. Raw emotion was hard to come by when people grow. They tend to be more...seclusive, with their emotions.

You, on the other hand, were free-balling it. You did NOT care if people were gonna look at you weird, you are gonna cry because you are sad! And honestly, Yelan's glad that the Almighty Creator is expressive and sentient. It proves just how much you care for the characters.

"It seems the Almighty Creator is far more connected than anyone thought..." She wonders what she can do with this information, but at the same time, keep it under wraps. Letting this information slip into the wrong hands was always dangerous.

She wouldn't gamble your safety. Never. Safe to say Yelan's got you covered.

Itto

Woah, woah! He did not expect you, the Almighty Creator, to be crying their eyes out the moment he wakes up from passing out and all that—what he miss? What happened while he was sleeping?

Wait, they're not in the Chasm anymore? Oh Archons, someone just tell him what happened! Why the heck is the Creator balling his eyes out?

"Huh—? What's going on? We're out of the chasm?" Poor guy is so oblivious, and no one's bothering to fill him in—at least, at the moment.

He'll pester Shinobu about this later. Just, someone, stop the Creator from crying! Those are sad tunes, not something you want to hear when you should be celebrating about leaving that gloomy place!

Yanfei

She was NOT expecting you to be this emotional! Yanfei feels a little guilty not being able to do anything about it, to be honest...

She has to resist the urge to shake Xiao out of his stupor, because a) that was unprofessional, b) she's more relieved than anything, and c) Yanfei wasn't sure if you, the Creator, would think she was okay if she started acting out like that.

So, instead, she tries to ground herself, and do her best to make sure that the situation is fine, and that everything will be okay. That's the least she can do to reassure you, and everyone else, right?

"Hopefully, Their Grace will stop those tears...Hearing them sad makes me feel sad..." As a lawyer, Yanfei knows how to sympathize with her clients. This, however, felt like she could really understand what you were going through—there was a bond between you and everyone.

She doesn't want to make you sad. That's one thing for sure. Yanfei wouldn't be able to sleep out of guilt otherwise.

Shinobu

She wasn't expecting you to be crying your heart out, but she loves how sentient you are. It shows just how you truly care about Xiao, and about everyone.

She really appreciates you. She can see how you connect with every character—how you cheer with everyone, cherish the moment with everyone, rejoice, and mourn. This was visible proof of it all.

"Hm...How should we comfort Their Grace..." Shinobu wants to do something—for the sake of the gang's gratitude for their Almighty Creator. And everyone here as well.

You contributed much of yourself for them. For that, she's grateful.

She'll have to explain to Boss later...but that's besides the point right now.

Xiao

He feels guilty for making you cry. He heard you call out his name several many times. He hears how you ball your eyes out, thinking you were gonna lose him, only for Rex Lapis to save him just in time.

He doesn't know if the Lord of Geo heard your divine prayers, or if he went on his own accord, but he feels guilty. He placed a heavy burden on you. He didn't mean to.

"How should I make it up to Their Grace..." He listens to how you scream and cry (out of joy now) that he was alive. You, the Almighty Creator, already connected yourself to someone like him. Your bond was too severe, and he tried to cut it off.

But the way the Traveler is smiling at them with a reassuring smile, Xiao wonders if he will be forgiven. Perhaps far quicker than he imagined.

Ghost Rebel Side Notes: This honestly feels too OOC—I don't really know Yelan's personality all that well, and honestly I don't think I caught the full potential of Yanfei, Itto, and Shinobu. I do hope you enjoyed this, but I'm also sorry if this came out disappointing.

✦ Check out The Ghost Rebel’s Blog Description & Info Page to See if Their Mailbox is Open! ✦

[callsign-rogueone]

all the small things - g.t.

Garrick Tavis x gn!reader 💌: …would you consider writing something for Garrick that explores some of the little intimate, familiar, or caring details he would do for/with the person he’s in a relationship with? words: 1.1k 🏷: no book spoilers! NSFW at the end, because it’s Garrick and I had to. just some thoughts about Gare being soft and cute (and a little sexy) with his partner. I managed to make this gender neutral. I’m trying a list format this time bc that flows better than a dozen little scraps lol

I feel like Garrick is a quiet partner, that he shows his feelings for you in a lot of little ways that you might not even notice.

He’s just always there.

If you’re studying, he’s studying with you, or working on something else quietly, sharpening his knives, etc.

While you’re chatting with a friend, he’s sitting a foot or two away, slicing a clean dagger through an apple, cutting off a small piece and extending it to you silently.

He is absolutely not afraid to use his stature and his scary reputation to his advantage when it comes to protecting you. 

Some guy made you uncomfortable in the laundry room? Well, now every Thursday night is laundry night for both of you, and he’s gonna stand behind you the whole time, brooding at anyone in the room Xaden-style and making sure they leave you alone.

Your safety is his number one priority.

We all know Dain’s philosophy — I’m going to do everything I can to keep you out of harm’s way

Garrick’s is a bit more nuanced — Harm is going to come to you no matter what, because the world is cruel and we’re literally preparing for war. While I’ll still do everything I can to protect you, I’ll also do everything I can to teach you to protect yourself.

He’s strict about keeping your training routine, giving you extra practice sparring near-daily. He knows when you can handle it and when you can’t. On days when you’re truly exhausted, injured, or at your limit, or something really upset you etc, you’ll spend training time resting — cuddles!

I know this man is an amazing cuddler. All that soft, warm muscle… big hands… strong arms to wrap around you… there’s no escape. Not that you’d ever want to leave lol

… Where were we?

He takes responsibility for your safety (as much as he can in this very dangerous school) while still letting you handle yourself.

That said, he’ll take matters into his own hands for small situations. He will not hesitate to pull you out of the way if people run by and might bump into you, etc. (plus it’s an excuse for him to hug you in the middle of the day lol)

He grabbed you by the back of your shirt once to stop you from hitting the ground when you tripped over your own shoelace — he then proceeded to set you upright and kneel down to tie said shoelace for you. 

Xaden never lets him hear the end of that. (“How come you never tie my shoes for me, Gare?”)

Big acts of service guy.

He’ll fill your water bottle in the morning, and he expects it to be empty at the end of the day or he will make you chug it because hydration is important. He ignores any eye rolls or complaints — you both know that he does this because he loves you.

He makes sure you’re eating, knows your favorite and least favorite foods, and will wordlessly move things on / off of your plate at meals, because you’re sitting directly next to him, of course. You know he wants you close and that’s a way you show love back to him. You also give him your leftovers sometimes. The boy can eat; that's half of how he put on so much muscle.

If you have long hair, he’ll keep one of your hairbands or pins etc in his pocket for whenever the need arises. He likes helping you with your hair, too. He's not the best at braiding or doing other hairstyles, but he’s trying and he’s improving! He also absolutely loves it when you sit in front of him and let him brush your hair / detangle / condition it etc.

He will always take the opportunity to wash your hair. He's super thorough with it and it feels so nice and relaxing.

As Ilya Kaminsky wrote: “Soaping together / is sacred to us / Washing each other’s shoulders. / You can fuck / anyone— but with whom can you sit / in water?”

Garrick. Garrick is whom. he loves showering with you after a long day, washing your back or places you can’t reach, being super gentle with any injuries you have, kissing every bruise and scar.

aaand this is getting nsfw, because it’s Garrick;

Don’t get me wrong though — he loves showering with you for other reasons, too. He loves seeing you naked, obviously, loves gliding soapy hands over your skin, kneading the softest parts of you, massaging gently and getting you all pliant and relaxed for him…

He’ll never pass up an offer to press you against the tiled wall and fuck you until you need to take another shower.

Speaking of fucking… Garrick fucks. 

He took his sweet time with you in the beginning, when your relationship was just starting, because he wanted to make you feel loved and safe with him of course, but also because he was studying.

He’s learned almost everything about your body. He knows what feels good for you, and recognizes all the signs that you’re about to cum — the cute sounds and expressions you make, the way your breathing changes and you grip his hand a little tighter… 

King of praise btw. The boy cannot shut up between the sheets. always telling you how pretty you are, how well you’re taking it, that you deserve to feel so good, just relax and let it out…

But it isn’t all soft and sweet. He's strong, and you’ve put that strength to the test multiple times. He's more than able to pin you down, to keep your legs spread, to hold you in all sorts of positions while he does what he does best.

Being an executive officer comes with a lot of paperwork, and he often gets stuck doing Xaden’s too (they really need to stop using that as a betting chip), but if you sit on his bed all pretty and keep quiet while he works on it, he’ll make it up to you by bending you over the desk when he’s finished.

Remember what I said about keeping you out of danger? There's gonna be consequences if you do something reckless in training or out in the field… That’s all I’ll say on the subject for now 🤭 

I got a little carried away there… Can you tell I’m currently working on three different Garrick smuts? gonna be exploring some of those things in more detail ^^ 👀

all in all, Gare is an amazing boyfriend and he loves you so much 🥺 big strong boy is just so soft for you and only you, and wants to take care of you all the time and make you feel loved and protect you from the cruelty of the world. ❤️

[ariespellz]

hand holding hcs !!

ft. genshin guys + gn!reader

includes: ayato, gorou, venti, kazuha, heizou, tighnari, dainsleif.

one, two, three.

cw: fluff, established relationship, some parts might be longer than others, alcohol mentions in venti's, a bit suggestive in venti's if you squint, i can't write tighnari to save my life, spoilers in dain's (?) and mostly very full of speculation:')

A/N: THIS TOOK SO LONG.. BUT HERE IT IS LOL. i might not be doing anything this long w this many characters ever again :')) maybe the third part as the last and thats it lol. ANYWAY SORRY!!! I HAD THE WORST WRITERS BLOCK EVERR AND I BEGAN CLASS AGAIN :((

AYATO

either the king of hand holding or the worst one on the list.

choose your fighter.

his hands are SOOO soft. he hasn't picked up a single sword without gloves since was like, five.

or anything, for that matter

also slender, bony and long fingers?? really pretty nails??

phew rich kids i swear

as stated before, he can be super sweet and intimate, intertwining your fingers with care

or he'll practically drag you by your wrist. not even in a mean way just,,

yeah

he probably has no idea what he's doing. he has no reference on what to do or on how to behave aside from the cheesy romance novels ayaka likes to read.

no parents or parent-like figures in his life, and (i assume) barely any physical affection with his sister, as much as they love each other.

that's why he craves it in some way. probably

PDA is not for him. at all.

he's a very private person who dislikes public appearances

so holding hands while walking around the city would happen every once in a blue moon.

HOWEVER!!!

it's cool if you're alone

more than cool, in fact

he likes it a lot. when he has free time he takes you in quiet dates throughout inazuma's nature

in those moments he sometimes moves your hand to his lips and kisses the knuckles <33

it's so gentle and sweet, and sometimes he'll whisper praises too

"you're so precious, my love."

UGHH blushing and giggling and kicking my feet in the air rn

and oh god poor thoma. they guy is always the one to find you two.

"my lord, an officer is waiting to..." he trails off after seeing you in his lap while he worked on paperwork, his free hand stroking yours. you giddily wave to him as a greeting, and he returns the gesture with a nod and a friendly smile of his own. "...right. i'll tell him to come back later. sorry for the interruption!"

you two are lucky he's so used to it.

unfortunately, he's not always the one who catches you.

if your footsteps are soft and your ears are open, you can hear some of the maids gossip about you two.

"oh, they're so lovely! did you hear the rumours?" "about the picnic? yeah! mei told me they were cuddling! can you picture that?" "yeah! lord kamisato's totally smitten!"

it always makes you smile.

as inexperienced as he was when it came to physical affection, he was the first one to hold your hand.

ayaka had told him that "it would give you butterflies".

you BET she was right like-

a fish out of the water is the closest comparison of how your heart was pounding

although inexperienced, ayato is a natural-born romantic. he's sitting in front of you in some expensive restaurant, candles and roses and a private room (just for you two of you, just like he likes it). he's as nervous as you, if not more. this is your first official date!

remembering what ayaka said, his right hand approached yours, in a slightly shy way. "may i?" he murmurs, brushing his digits over yours.

"sure!" you answer, voice meek and an octave higher than usual.

he finds your enthusiasm funny

in a good way

in conclusion, he's not as slick as he'd like to be lol

half the estate has seen you two. the other half is patiently waiting their turn.

over time, he gets more used to it. no more dragging you, no more grasp that's barely there, just,, a normal hold.

a sweet one tho<3

GOROU

physical touch is not his love language

but he doesn't dislike it!! he'll do it if you're into it!!

he's really soft about it and you can see his tail wagging happily hehshdhdhsjsj<3

he's a very assertive man and a good (but somehow strict?) general, so his subordinates never get used to see you two interact ESPECIALLY when it comes to affection

gorou: *has your hand in his*

troops passing by: *😲*

you change him i'm telling you

he's pretty good at separating his work and personal life, so expect the affection to be more common in private

hand holding is not his forte nor his preferred way of showing physical affection, but he'll still get flustered from it

"the supplies are to be sent to the sangonomiya shrine. that is our main objective right now." he says, voice stern. his body, however, betrays him once you reach out to grab his hand. his ears flop immediately and his tail swings rapidly from side to side, cheeks starting to turn pink. you can't help but giggle when his eyes flicker between you and his subordinates, full of nerves.

"we saw nothing, sir," one of them says, clearly biting back a smile. "your orders will be followed immediately." he bows and leaves hurriedly.

they still talk about that to this day.

his hands are average size. not super tiny, but definitely smaller than ayato's or dainsleif's (side note: just noticed this applies to every guy in this post except those two and pantalone lmao).

his palms are a bit rough and he has some scratches here and there, but he makes sure his nails are clean and decent.

hald holding with him (ironically enough) isn't that common

you were the one to do it for the first time.

you guys weren't even dating (yet) and you were pinning hard

so after bribing some of his underlings with cookies, you managed to get them to do part of his work (and also get him to relax for an afternoon)

((with you, or course.))

(((the soldiers knew their boss had been crusing on you for centuries, so it was a win-win situation for them)))

sitting on a cliff, watching the scenery. beautiful pastel tones mixed with the pink hue of the sky in the sunset. he was next to you, eyes set on the horizon somehow looking unfocused. the golden light adorned his beautiful features, and you wanted nothing more than to embrace him and never let go.

you knew, however, that you had to be careful. you could've chosen the safest option and shut your mouth, like you always did. but no, not today.

with that in mind, you slowly place you palm in his hand. his ears immediatelly perk up as he looks at you, not bothering to pull away.

"i like you. a lot. and, uh, i'm just happy i can be here with you." you cough out in the spur of the moment. his eyes widen like coins and his tail straightens. he chokes a bit with his words, coming up with nothing to say.

it was a it awkward, really. you had your eyes fixed in the place your skin touched with his, refusing to adress his burning stare. regret filled your gut, and you tried to pull away, ready to stand up and go home to cry under the covers.

but a hand grasping your wrist stops you.

he looks like a deer in headlights, eyes gleaming and face redder than ever.

five words come out of his mouth, faster than any others he has ever muttered:

"are you free on sunday?"

VENTI

ah, venti...

he'd use handcuffs to chain you two together if he could.

he is very much a PDA guy. has no shame.

worth it tho because his hands are illegally soft. like cotton.

and his fingers are slender and delicate.

oh and there was no special "first time holding hands!!! exciting!!!!" moment

because guess who got touchy right after figuring his feelings out?

you guessed it! him!!

he snaked an arm around your waist, holding you close, and intertwined your fingers with his. it would have been romantic (and kinda hot, even) if it wasn't for the fact that the poor, poor honorary knight had to physically separate him from you so he would go home already.

"oh, love, one has never seen such beauty. never in thousands of years has a flowery field or a sunset in the ocean compared to your endless eyes." he recites close to your neck, hot breath fanning on your skin making a shiver run down your spine. aside from the fact that you have literally no idea what he means by thousands of years, his lidded orbs boring into yours don't help. "i would become a sailor if it meant that i could spend my life navigating in the ocean of your eyes. would you let me drown in them?"

"i don't get paid enough for this." the blonde mutters, secretly envying the fact that paimon was already sleeping.

"me neither." you say in return with an awkward laugh, wishing that the darkness covered your blush.

he gets a bit poetic after a couple of bottles, what can i say.

diluc always stares at you when you have to go pick him up from the tavern

you swear that's pity flooding his usually soulless eyes

you have the anemo archon wrapped around your finger

quite the accomplishment, if you were to ask me

he's all over you. especially (but not exclusively) when he's tipsy, or (god forbid) drunk.

oh yeah baby

DRUNK.

he gets on top of some table, requests the lights to be dimmed, and pulls out his lyre

and starts to sing the cheesiest song you have ever heard

(even the ever-so-cold sister rosaria smiles at the spectacle full of amusement)

"oooooh, babe, i want nothing but youuuu!" kaeya sings the chorus with slurred words and broken laughs (ironic, considering he's usually the sad drunk) as the others clap along. some guys have gotten up and started dancing.

"do something!" you plead charles, but he just laughs even louder at your desperation. you frown and bite your lips so you don't start doing the same. "for fucks sake, venti! get off there, its three in the morning!"

"why do you have to be so cruuuuel???" he sings in a cry, full of emotion. dropping to his knees in a dramatic way, he tugs at your arm to pull you closer. and right then and there, he stops singing abruptly. "i love you. i love you so, so much." his eyes water and your breath hitches. suddenly serious, his flushed cheeks have your heart doing flips. "you're gorgeous, (y/n). i wish you'd let me stare at you all day. you're the only thing i think about. i want to tell you- no. i need to tell you-"

at that moment, the door slammed open.

"you again?" diluc groaned. everything went silent except for kaeya, who greeted him excitedly, making his way to him in big stomps. noticing this, the redhead sighs tiredly. "show's over, everyone. we're closing for the night."

the drunkards groaned the first time this happened, but because of it repeating every month, they've gotten used to it.

the guy has the patience of a saint, you note.

"let's go home, then," you always say with a kiss to his cheek "you tone-deaf bard."

KAZUHA

out of context but this guy invented chivalry

no i will not give any further explanations

he'll hold your hand like he gets paid for it. so enthused about it.

unlike the three messed up people (lovingly) above, this one does the thumb rubbing thing!! (hooray i guess)

his hands are probably rough considering he uses a katana without gloves/is literally a wanderer. but. i can't picture it. let a woman dream.

OH AND HE'LL TAKE HIS BANDAGE OFF IN PRIVATE IF YOU ASK HIM TO <3

just imagine it aaaaa

he stares at you in pure disbelief EVERY SINGLE TIME YOU ASK

LIKE NO KAZUHA THE BURN MARKS ARE NOT UGLY

and when you tell him that he blushes aahhzhsgzwkshjsjs

still! he's very shy about it (oddly enough) so he will only do it if you've been together for more than, let's say, 6 months?? maybe??

he'll slowly unwraps the cloth, cheeks slightly flushed (as always). it's constant, really; he doesn't falter but he doesn't speed up.

that is, until he comes to a stop. right above the mark.

"kazu," you call. he looks at you through his lashes, full of... embarrassment? "you don't have to if you don't feel like it. but... that's not the case, is it?"

he looks so out of character, gulping and avoiding your gaze. he breathes and tries to say something, but he stops himself and stares at his lap.

"look at me, love." you request, placing your palm on his cheek. "you don't need to hide yourself. you're beautiful."

he stammers a compliment and looks away, clearly flustered by the affection

how cute

those times are when you get to see him timid

no one will believe you, but he's the clingy one

hands on your shoulders, on your hips, waist, face, thighs, and most importantly, on your hands.

the first time you held hands, he was the one initiating the contact

you weren't dating, or even close

that was the day you started crushing on him

wether you were a fellow pirate in the crux fleet or just some person travelling with them on one (1) time makes no difference

the storm unravelling in front of you could terrify anyone

you were, of course, no exception

captain beidou's loud voice, commanding the last preparations before seeking shelter

the loud crackling of thunder, and the constant crash of the waves

the raindrops which fell like knives, making a sound similar to bullets when they hit the wooden floor

the footsteps, your heartbeat, the ropes being pulled

it was just too much

breath quickening, you tried to calm down. teardrops were beginning to form on your eyes but you didn't allow yourself to cry.

it'd be downright embarrassing, considering that everyone else seemed to be taking the situation with cold precision

and oh, fuck, your hands and legs were trembling like jelly

you heard beidou yell something in your direction, and next thing you knew, someone was pulling you inside to the hold.

"it's okay. you're safe now." kazuha's gentle voice lulls you. he's gently grasping your hands in his, rubbing comforting patterns in your skin. you curl up, fingers tightening as the ship rocks violently. you silently thank him when he doesn't pull away or swats you off, opting to huddle closer to you instead. his warmth makes your muscles relax slightly, and he chuckles lightly at it. "feeling better already? i'm glad."

you had never really talked to kazuha, as he often refrained from taking place in the numerous drinking competitions the fleet celebrated on sundays.

(let's just say, that changed in the future)

crimson orbs meet yours when you choose to face the man, and suddenly your face has turned into their rival in a fictional challenge.

you thank him again and straighten up, coming back to your senses. you instantly miss his body heat, but you say nothing.

he does not, however, seem to have any intentions of letting your hand go.

HEIZOU

oh dear god

you're in for a ride

you see, he can be the perfect boyfriend

but he can be a little shit too

it depends on how much he'd like to tease you

if he feels like being an asshole, he'll conjoin your hands and swing them exaggeratedly while skipping and maybe even singing a little tune

he makes sure this is in public (unless it's crossing your boundaries), so he can embarrass you a bit

(if you, however, start replicating him, he'll make it progressively more obnoxious until one of you gives up)

((make it be him. please. place your entire body against his arm and bat your eyelashes at him like you're fucking minnie mouse or something. he's officially losing this one.))

"my dear! my everything!" he exclaimed, snaking your hips with one arm and conjoining your hands with the other. he presses kisses on your fingers, green eyes gleaming with mischief, and he finds it hard to fight back a cackle. this would've been funny, cute, ir even romantic, if it wasn't for the bewildered looks of his coworkers.

one dude actually yelled at him to at least do that in his office. once you were there, you questioned his triumphant expression

"ah, there was this boring case they wanted me to solve..." he snickered. "now they won't come into my office and pester me. i guess some other guy will do it."

fucking bastard (adoringly)

his fingers are long and slim, and his knuckles are rough

he literally throws punches as self-defense. no sword, no bow, just his fists.

by this, i imply that at least his knuckles and reverse of his fingers could exfoliate your skin better than any soap.

his palms are softer (not too big of an accomplishment. a three-day-beard could achieve that, too), and rather cold

heizou's preferred form of physical affection isn't hand holding, actually, so he's not too big on it

he makes an exception for the situation mentioned above AND if you're feeling nervous or stressed.

in the second case, he'll be more subtle. he can read you like a book, so he'll save you of any unwanted attention by softly caressing your palm and fingertips.

"it's okay" he whispers. "do you want to get out of here?"

and if you say yes, he'll excuse the both of you and get you some dango milk

he'll have your pinkies intertwined and walk side by side with you. no jokes or teasing remarks.

(he also manages to have the same exact pace as you. sometimes it's a bit hypnotizing to watch.)

oh and btw, you were the one holding his hand the first time

he knew you were smitten

he knew what you wanted

but he still said "hmm let's see what they do"

smirking at you your whole first date like "oooh you wanna kiss me so bad"

(PUNCH HIM. HE WON'T SEE THAT ONE COMING)

and while accompanying you back home, he's waiting patiently for you to make a move.

and of course he notices. he sees the way your hand shifts closer to his, only to pull away a second later. he sees from the corner of his eye the way your chest rises and falls progressively faster. and oh, archons! you're doing it!

you're lifting your hand up, and it's getting closer, and nearer, and omg it's right next to his--

"go on," he says in a teasing manner, breaking the silence. he wears an shit-eating grin as if it was his best suit "you can do it. i don't bite."

you swallow. you consider kicking him and running off, but you had genuinely enjoyed your afternoon and that'd be a waste. so, hesitantly, you did as you had planned.

his hand was warm, and there was no further chat until you arrived.

you were at the doorstep, saying your goodbyes.

"keep going, yeah?" he giggles right before leaving. "i'm expecting a kiss next time!"

"wha-"

it's up to determine wether he got it or not.

TIGHNARI

QODIAHUSBSUSJS AAAAAAA

OKOK HEAR ME OUT

you're a forest ranger too

so you two conveniently go on patrol together

who could've guessed?

even before you dated. consider that as his form of courting.

but but! the moment you two are official tho!!

he'll hold your hand constantly <3

its perfect because he's NOT a pda person. so he has his three favourite things together.

privacy, the forest, and you:)

expect collei to look beyond awkward whenever she catches you two having the slightest moment of physical affection in front of her

she loves you two and is very supportive !! she just does NOT know what to do with herself.

also HOLDING HANDS TO ASSERT DOMINANCE/hj

and by this i mean Very Obviously putting your intertwined hands over the table as you have dinner with cyno and collei

cyno: *🤨*

collei: *small politely and nod yall*

"...what clothes do clouds wear?" cyno reads from his (terrifying) book as you swallow your bite out of your pita pocket. he then proceeds to look straight at tighnari, who is currently two seconds away from jumping out of the window. "thunderwear."

the situation was so weird you couldn't help giggling a bit, covering your face with your free hand. at your side, tighnari's grip became a bit tighter. "unbelievable" he grits his teeth. and at that, you laugh harder.

you teased him for that dumb "jealous" episode for WEEKS. my man wanted to disappear from the face of teyvat.

on another note. his gloves.

they look so squishy idk how to say this.

the pads?? are like a jelly-esque material?? maybe slime condensant or whatever its called

so you can expect his bare hands to be SOFT. AND PRETTY. BECAUSE HE NEVER GOES OUT WITHOUT PROPER PROTECTION.

(as he should)

most likely the best hands in genshin together with albedo and maybe scaramouche?? nah scratch that pantalone must have the best manicure in the world

back on point. his nails are kinda pointy (he is a fox so it is to be expected) so DO NOT ask him to scratch your back. he'll say no anyway but beware.

it'll be more painful than satisfying. does not fully count if you're a masochist.

anyways. he enjoys physical touch wayyy more than he'd like to admit.

hand holding isn't enough he wants you to pet his ears and spoon him (partner privilege what can i say)

tighnari's generally stern disposition was a challenge during the "chase" phase of the relationship. for the both of you.

on the one hand, there were your compliments and your not-so-secret intention to win him over.

on the other hand, he blatantly refused to flirt back, but still managed to flirt back.

you know the difference?

like, never once in a million years would he see his crush and say "you look amazing, darling. are you free tonight?" and wink.

BUT he will say "that shade of green is nice." and oh so conveniently need your help writing some stuff down.

("paperwork. nothing too interesting" he'll say when questioned. "mind your business" is what he means.)

you learn to pick up on it. and he learns to be more bold.

you let him hold your hand the first time.

he's not that fond of physical touch, and you didn't want to cross his boundaries, so you let him take those steps.

it was a warm summer night in sumeru. the kind of warm in which the breeze is pleasant and no jacket is needed.

you were stargazing and pointing out constellations together,

and he just. went for it.

"hold my hand" he said without looking at you. it wasn't that much of a statement, because the softness in his tone made it sound like a suggestion.

a smile appears on your face while your insides tickle, and you feel a bit ridiculous for being so excited over something so simple. "as you wish" you teasingly say, taking hold of his hand.

the lack of light makes it hard to read his expression, or see if he's blushing.

a thousand questions race in your head, mixed with worries and things you'd like to say

all of them dissipate when he interlaces your fingers.

DAINSLEIF

well first of all

he's very,,,

devoted

by which i mean you are his moon and stars

he'll BATHE YOU in affection.

he wouldn't even entertain the idea of dating someone he doesn't trust completely and/or hasn't been with him for a long time

you make him soft lol,,,, use that info however you want

he does the thumb rubbing thing!!! a king fr

ah and he's not taking off his gloves. because of the curse, his skin is probably a bit unsettling to see?

so is yours, considering you share his condition.

he isn't that into physical touch, though. and even less into pda.

so there's three situations in which he holds your hand:

while walking around alone, when you're nervous or scared, and in the intimacy of your home

it's on the quiet days around teyvat that he doesn't wanna let go

it's standing before the enemy, which haunts you two like prey, that he reminds you he would never let go

and it's while sleeping, huddled together, that he holds you close to him and intertwines your fingers<3

like i sad, no pda.

he might make an exception if it's the traveller with you, but uhh not really...???

hes so awkward about it too like-- it can get funny sometimes.

like one time he held you by the waist when you visited stormterror's lair and paimon just commented on it

had he been not so stoic he might have jumped away from you like his instincts yelled

and she didn't even say anything weird. maybe something like "you look good together!" or "huh?! you like him?!"

she adores you so she's very much Confused™ by your taste

give her time she'll get over it

but you get it, really. the picture of dainsleif she has could never compare to yours.

you still remember, all those centuries ago, when you took a leap of faith and pulled him to the dancefloor.

well, not exactly a dancefloor, but more of a 𝒹𝒶𝓃𝒸𝓮𝒻𝓁ℴℴ𝓻 ???

yeah like . elegant.

he was the dainsleif, and you were just. you

i mean babe ur great and all but hes like the strongest (and hottest lets be honest) guy in khaenri'ah. good luck!!

some friends encouraged you. this was a big celebration!! the eclipse dynasty and its descendants rarely ever organized parties. not in their home, at least.

so after months of watching the twilight sword from afar, you finally had a chance (although slim) of approaching him

so you got ready (best clothes, best accesories, and a lengthy skincare session) and when some animated music started to play, it was your chance

"you got this!" your friends said. "yeah, you look stunning! he's saying yes for sure!"

he's talking with some colleagues and the rush of adrenaline slowly leaves you,

but oh no! it's too late. you've made eye contact and he's two meters away from you.

"breathe, calm down" you tell yourself. your steps become wobbly but the resolution doesn't leave your features.

dainsleif looks surprised when you stop in front of him, and the guy he was chatting with (who you recognize as halfdan, one of his most loyal underlings) elbows him with a smile before excusing himself in a teasing tone

"may i help you?" he asks. oh god, his voice always makes your insides tickle. you open and close your mouth before pursuing your lips and speaking in a more... assured tone.

"yes. i was wondering if you'd like to... to dance with me?" you chuckle nervously as dain gapes at you, clearly shocked. "i mean! you probably have better things to do and... you are probably very uncomfortable right now. uh, sorry! i'll just leave-"

"i'd love to" he interrupts with a small smile. "also, you look very beautiful today, (y/n)."

"oh." you beam, holding his wrist gently. "thanks. you, uh, you always look beautiful." as you guide him among the other couples, you swear you can hear some knights cheering.

and the rest is history :')

side note: forgot to mention you were freaking out because "OH MY GOD HE KNOWS MY NAME?? HE KNOWS OF ME EXISTING???? AND HE. SAID. YES??????"

however, with dain, life's not sunshine and rainbows.

he trusts you, of course, and he loves you even more

but he still refuses to ask for comfort. no matter how many times you make him understand your feelings for him, he just doesn't seem to understand a word.

sometimes you face his walls and are struck by a sudden wave of disappointment.

it's not like you want to know every thought and emotion that crosses him, but communication can be hard sometimes.

like when he had jumped into the abyss without a care in the world.

you are angry, of course. you had been sick with worry, crying and pacing and lucky in the few nights you had been able to sleep.

he had (conveniently) reappeared next to the traveler, inside the chasm (or at least that was what he told you). from that point on, the story became more twisted.

but his voice was so groggy as he told you, and his eyes were peering at you with so much tiredness, you couldn't help taking his hands in yours and resting his body against you.

"i'm sorry." he repeated over and over, becoming more desperate each time. lacking the strength to even straighten his back, he barely mustered the energy to slightly squeeze your hands.

"let's rest for a while, yes? i'm just happy that you're back."

he's so grateful for everything you do :(

being with him would be living in a hurt/(no?) comfort fic 24/7 actually lol i kinda wanna cry

being with him takes effort, resilience, and overall, it's hard

though as he links your fingers and his eyes fill with sheer devotion and adoration, you think it's all worth it :')

[throwaway-yandere]

𝙼𝙰𝚂𝚃𝙴𝚁𝙻𝙸𝚂𝚃:

"–ℌ𝔢 𝔴𝔥𝔬 𝔣𝔦𝔤𝔥𝔱𝔰 𝔱𝔬𝔬 𝔩𝔬𝔫𝔤 𝔞𝔤𝔞𝔦𝔫𝔰𝔱 𝔡𝔯𝔞𝔤𝔬𝔫𝔰 𝔟𝔢𝔠𝔬𝔪𝔢𝔰 𝔞 𝔡𝔯𝔞𝔤𝔬𝔫 𝔥𝔦𝔪𝔰𝔢𝔩𝔣; 𝔞𝔫𝔡 𝔦𝔣 𝔶𝔬𝔲 𝔤𝔞𝔷𝔢 𝔱𝔬𝔬 𝔩𝔬𝔫𝔤 𝔦𝔫𝔱𝔬 𝔱𝔥𝔢 𝔞𝔟𝔶𝔰𝔰, 𝔱𝔥𝔢 𝔞𝔟𝔶𝔰𝔰 𝔴𝔦𝔩𝔩 𝔤𝔞𝔷𝔢 𝔦𝔫𝔱𝔬 𝔶𝔬𝔲. 𝔅𝔲𝔱 𝔶𝔬𝔲 𝔨𝔫𝔬𝔴 𝔱𝔥𝔞𝔱 𝔴𝔢𝔩𝔩, 𝔡𝔬𝔫'𝔱 𝔶𝔬𝔲, 𝔪𝔶 𝔟𝔢𝔩𝔬𝔳𝔢𝔡 𝔬𝔲𝔯𝔬𝔟𝔬𝔯𝔬𝔰?"

GENSHIN IMPACT

MONDSTADT:

Albedo:

"No." (Professor!Albedo/Student!Reader)

Diluc Ragnvindr:

Dinner With Steaks and Flowers

His Closest Childhood Friend (Soldier, Poet, King)

"O Capo! My Capo!" (debut: chapter 2)

Not Through The Grapevine (yandere!idol event)

I Got Reincarnated As A Server NPC In An Otome Game But A Capture Target Won’t Leave Me Alone 

Kaeya Alberich:

ESTHER (yandere!idol event)

Maid!Merman!Kaeya drabble

"Venti":

Hysteric Humanoid (SAGAU)

LIYUE:

"Zhongli":

Waking Up A Lying Dragon (Bakunawa!Reader)

"If the pedestal is beautiful, then the statue must be even more beautiful."

Xiao:

Wound Dressings (yan!idol event)

Yanfei

Quick yan!fei (lol) brainrot

INAZUMA:

Arataki "Numero Uno" Itto:

Hana Yori Dango (non!yandere itto)

Of Dream A-Dreaming (yandere!idol event)

Kaedehara Kazuha

Flawless

Kamisato Ayato:

Blind Obedience (P2: A Myriad of Fallen Leaves)

Careful, He Bites (P2: Hana Yori Dango) 

Ghost in the Kamisato Estate (minific series)

EDMR (yandere!idol event)

ERROR 401: GONE (Faceless!Ayato)

Faceless Ayato thoughts 1,

The Owner Who Broke The Leash (Chainsaw Man au with Ayato as Makima)

Raiden Ei:

Sunshowers

Thoma:

His Adorable Pen Pal (Soldier, Poet, King)

Shikanoin Heizou

Posteriori (yandere!idol event)

SUMERU:

Alhaitham:

Vision Qualifications

Worksheets 

"O Capo! My Capo!" (Mafia au series)

Alhaitham's Type (yandere!idol event)

Alhaitham selling his soul to a devil!reader brainrot

Dendro NA: 101 (Can be read as VQ’s p2)

Flawless

Cyno:

"O Capo! My Capo!" (Mafia au series)

Alone Together (yandere!idol event)

Dottore:

Click & Drag drabble (feat Cyno)

Classical Conditioning

"Aren't You Supposed To Hate Me?" (yandere!idol event)

Tighnari:

Creative Differences (check "#tag: cd - tighnari" for additional headcanons)

"O Capo! My Capo!!" (Mafia au series)

The Boar Prince/ss (non-yandere secret santa event)

Kaveh:

Paint (non!yandere kaveh, just fluff)

Canvas (drabble)

Flawless

His Version of You

Short boyfriend!kaveh drabble on OCMC/Mafia setting

Wanderer:

Apotheosis Upon Your First Feast

Scarborough Fair/Canticle (Prince au)

Flawless

Drabble: Prince Scara x Farmer

FOUNTAINE:

Neuvillette:

Death Has No Dignity

Wriothesley:

And The Sun Is Silent

SNEZHNAYA/FATUI:

Childe/Tartaglia/Ajax:

His Ice Fishing Buddy (Soldier, Poet, King)

Comfort (drabble)

Pantalone:

Apotheosis Upon Your First Feast

OUTLANDERS/KHAENRIAH'NS:

Aether:

Hysteric Humanoid (SAGAU)

Dainsleif, my beloved:

Hysteric Humanoid

Ouroboros, The 8th Capo (OC!MC!)

Estella's Modern!Dain x Reader but I made it yandere lmao (dw it's my irl bestie)

"If You Truly Loved Me, You Should Be Dead" (hitman!dain, my husband.)

Dolce Stil Nuovo

Lumine:

Hysteric Humanoid

𝐒𝐄𝐑𝐈𝐄𝐒

SOLDIER, POET, KING

"What if Varka's cousin found 3 different secret admirers?"

"Someone like that getting admirers? As if."

Parts:

His Ice Fishing Buddy, His Adorable Pen Pal, His Closest Childhood Friend

HYSTERIC HUMANOID

"Even today, don't give up on a human heart; claim it even if it hurts." - ALKALOID

A SAGAU fic where The Creator had turned into an amnesiac who believed they're a mere impostor with a knack for gravity manipulation and not much else. And it appears that both Lumine and Dainsleif would stop at nothing to get you on their side.

Chapters, Side Stories & Their Main Focus Characters:

♦ Prologue: The Longest Devout Believers - Dainsleif, Lumine, Venti, and Kaeya

♦ Chapter 1: 500 Year Long Identity Crisis - Baizhu, Dainsleif, Lumine

♦ Drabble 1: How would they celebrate your birthday/The Creator's anniversary? - Dainsleif, Lumine, Baizhu, Venti, Kaeya, Zhongli, Ayaka

♦ Chapter 2: A Contract Long Overdue (WIP) - Zhongli, Dainsleif, Kaeya

"O CAPO! MY CAPO!"

Set in visionless 1920s Teyvat, three inconspicuous yet significant men began to spy on the Fatui's 8th Capo: (Y/n) (L/n). The story begins when the Innamorati Familia's headquarters burns down and in a twist of fate, to say that you've been dealt with an awful hand would be the understatement of the decade. Can you survive– most importantly– can you make the right choices? ((Welcome to the interactive mafia au fic! Have fun voting on the polls!!!))

Otome Game Main Love Interests:

Inquisitor Cyno, Informant Tighnari, Underboss Alhaitham, (CURRENTLY LOCKED: Church Architect Kaveh)

Secret Routes:

Visconti Diluc, "Venti" (LOCKED), ??? (LOCKED), ???, ???, ???

Chapters:

1: "O Capo! My Capo!"

2: The Capo's Soliloquy 

Bad End 1: "You're Collei's Friend, After All!"

3: The Fox Hunt (Tuqburni)

BRAND NEW ARCHON (Chapter 1-3 animatic)

Short bf!Kaveh drabble (not "canon)

"My Beloved Producer..." (GENSHIN IDOL AU)

Masterlist

NOTE: CHECK YOUR COMMUNITY LABEL SETTINGS AND TURN OFF FILTERS IF THE MASTERLIST LINK WON'T WORK. Tumblr must've thought I wrote something explicit (in a masterlist???) and tagged it as mature :///

Flawless

Aka: my last fanfic featuring Scaramouche, Alhaitham, Kaveh, and Kazuha. A fanfic-game with 4 branching endings.

Premise: You're stuck in a killing game inside your dream school. It started with 16 students– and now you're left with only 6 of them. Senior Faruzan was murdered. Who is the culprit among these 5 people?

Link

FIRE EMBLEM: THREE HOUSES

BLUE LIONS:

Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd: (my fave fictional man of all time)

Saudade

ps: he's your underboss in "O Capo! My Capo!" lol

BLACK EAGLES:

(coming soon...)

GOLDEN DEER:

(coming soon...)

GARREG MACH MONASTERY:

(coming soon...)

HONKAI: STAR RAIL

ASTRAL EXPRESS:

(coming soon...)

JARILO VI:

Gepard Landau

What Happened At 10:10 (has 2 endings. Won't link it, reach the end of the story in your own way.)

XIANZHOU LUOFU:

Jing Yuan

Misaligned Strings (non-yandere, pure fluff & angst)

IPC

Dr. Veritas Ratio

His Version of You

PENACONY

Sunday

Cannibal!Sunday HCs

"ℑ'𝔡 𝔤𝔩𝔞𝔡𝔩𝔶 𝔣𝔬𝔩𝔩𝔬𝔴 𝔶𝔬𝔲 𝔱𝔬 𝔱𝔥𝔢 𝔢𝔫𝔡 𝔬𝔣 𝔱𝔥𝔢 𝔴𝔬𝔯𝔩𝔡."

"𝔟𝔲𝔱 𝔪𝔶 𝔟𝔢𝔩𝔬𝔳𝔢𝔡, 𝔱𝔥𝔢𝔯𝔢 𝔦𝔰 𝔫𝔬 𝔢𝔫𝔡. 𝔴𝔥𝔞𝔱 𝔶𝔬𝔲'𝔯𝔢 𝔠𝔥𝔞𝔰𝔦𝔫𝔤 𝔞𝔣𝔱𝔢𝔯 𝔦𝔰 𝔶𝔬𝔲𝔯 𝔬𝔴𝔫 𝔱𝔞𝔦𝔩."

[toastandjamie]

More of my eye of the world re-read

Mat getting caught with a noose catch pole and having that be explicitly called out is such great foreshadowing. That boy can’t keep his neck OUT of nooses it seems

Nynaeve is even better than I remember, love her death and Thom as well

Lan is a lot meaner than I remember however lol, he has zero patience for the Emmonds Field boys

Speaking of why Lan has no patience for them, I didn’t catch on my first read of the series but the White Cloak Mat and Rand prank and antagonize was Dain Bornhald, what a coincidence, man is forever cursed to be humiliated and outsmarted by three farm boys rip

Shadar Logoth my beloathed, just- man I still can’t believe how easily Mordreth lured them into that trap lmao, and the hints at Mat snatching the dagger with him gripping it when Mordreth’s first attack and a cut of comment of “well at least I-“ most likely to say at least I managed to snag one piece of treasure before getting cut off by Perrin.

Speaking of Perrin, he really is just as much of a menace as the other two. It’s easy to forget since he’s generally the one keeping them in check but he’s very quick to tease Mat often enough lol

Also man I forgot how scary Morraine was in the beginning.

Ishamael in contrast is no longer scary to me and just funny. Just having the future knowledge that he has literally no idea who the dragon reborn is or literally anything about the three Ta’veren at all so he’s just saying random shit in a spooky tone and seeing what scares them lol

His comment about Rand’s parents being a stallion and breeding mate straight had me cackling

[eerna]

the reactions/comments on taryn's art on frostbite studios instagram piss me off sooo badddd 😭 the way these people have no qualms calling men like madoc balekin dain VALERIAN AND LOCKE hot and "hear me out" but when it's taryn its "they could never make me like you" and a bunch of backhanded comments the artist noticeably doesn't react to ... i just find it so curious how nobody in this fandom finds their hatred for taryn odd with a love interest like cardan no1 can tell me it isn't misogyny idc idc

Anon you are so right and I am about to take this as an opportunity to complain. INSTAGRAM IS LITERALLY INSANE, I can't post Taryn there without getting heaped with hate for days lol. The backhanded comments of "wow so pretty I thought she was Jude" are also so tiring. Frost is a stronger woman than me bc that amount of dumbass discussion in my notifications kills my braincells and I have to patrol the comments and delete them for the sake of my own sanity. Meanwhile the closest to Madoc hate I ever got was "Shrek is that you" and like you said all the comments under male antagonists' posts are thirsting after them. Nicasia also has mostly positive reactions, which is bizarre bc my girl's crimes against Jude are much worse and her redemption practically nonexistent, but those crimes don't include a man so I guess it's ok. Instagram is a scary place man

[ezziefae]

Part 2 THOUGHTS ON THE PRISONER"S THRONE PROLOGUE (spoilers)

I linked the prologue in part 1, click to read.

it’s absolutely horrific that Dain went this far to secure the throne. and it’s so sad to think about how Oak could’ve almost died. My poor boy.

well…a few relationships in the family have clearly not changed..

this interaction between jude and cardan is so…*chefs kiss* like wow. it pretty much summarizes their relationship. oh they’re adorable. i mean cardan turning into a snake was definitely an eventful experience for elfhame, if the folk aren’t composing songs about something else then it means that nothing eventful has beaten the snake incident. LOL

oh, speaking about biting..if had the chance to know wren i believe he would actually like her.

the topic of jude and cardan having kids will definitely play a role in this book. as of now, Oak believes Jude doesn’t want kids to make it clear that Oak will be next in line. Holly did say that we will know the answer to that question in this book. what do you guys think will happen?

LOTS OF THING TO UNPACK HERE…

in this part, leander asks oak to play with him, and oak says no. then leander accusingly say to him that Cardan PLAYS with him…

i find myself suprised to hear that, but it makes sense to Cardan’s character. Could holly be telling us that Cardan wouldn’t mind having kids of his own with Jude? could it be that jude and cardan DO want children but aren’t doing it for now to secure Oak’s line in the throne? Cardan does seems very good with Leander, despite him being the son of Locke who destroyed relationships and hurt Cardan’s loved ones. Any thoughts to that? jude and cardan could have their own reasons, maybe they don’t want kids at all, or maybe it’s too soon. But let me remind everyone that children in faerie are rare, and are treasured.

One last thing before we move on..It’s interesting to see that Cardan has told Leander stories about his father. Like what stories are even WORTH telling his KID. he was a terrible person. I’m cackling.

BINGOOOO, this is the reason why oak thinks cardan doesn’t like him!! from what it looks like, it seems like it’s a misunderstanding. But Tiernan did mention that “He knows.” So Cardan might definitely be suspicious of something.

Part 3 here!!

[dazais-guardian-angel]

Flying Too Close To the Moon (a Baizhu character analysis)

Over a year ago now, in February of 2023, Genshin Impact's twitter account posted about a certain green-haired doctor from Liyue with a snake, announcing that he was at long last going to become playable. *narrator voice* Little did I know at that point just how much my life was going to be ruined changed by this man, something I never could have fathomed in all my time of playing before.

Today, by the time of Baizhu's birthday, almost a year since his release, he has never left my team and is one of my ultimate comfort characters... and at the same time, paradoxically, fills me with such intense feelings of dread, if I ever think just a little too hard about him for a little too long.

This is my experience with him.

From the beginning, I wasn't one of the people who had been anxiously awaiting for Baizhu's release. I'd always been curious about him, and thought he was beautiful (but lol who in this game isn't?), but there was practically nothing to know, and he appeared so little, so not being an existing fan, I didn't think much about him compared to other more prominent characters. With that first drip marketing, however, I was suddenly instantly intrigued:

"Regrettably, Baizhu cannot save all his patients — himself, for example. Herbalist Gui has mentioned that Baizhu's physical condition is extremely poor, and he often has to go back to his residence to rest after seeing patients. Even so, his smile never falters while in front of people. When Gui asked him about this, he replied, "If the doctor looks sick himself, how can his patients face their illnesses with confidence?" Day after day, Baizhu heals his patients. His ever-present smile hides the numerous bitter medicines he takes and the pain he suffers alone."

What's this, Baizhu is a doctor who is also sick himself? He has a chronic illness?? Finally I have a disabled character in a video game I can play as and relate to??? Not to mention the DELICIOUS angst potential the (absolutely devastating) last sentence held. Unfortunately, because my lazy ass rarely ever talks to npcs outside of quests, I was completely unaware of this very important little fact about Baizhu, learned via Herbalist Gui that had been in the game since literally 1.0, but to say that I was excited upon finally learning it now was an understatement. This changed everything, turning a character I had previously only had a passing interest in into someone I felt like I might be able to connect with, and a character I could truly call my own. Previously, my favorite Genshin character was Zhongli — he was my very first limited 5* and I started the game pretty much because I was interested in him lol — but just from this short summary alone, I had a strong feeling that Baizhu had the potential to surpass him, and become my new favorite.

My initial impressions from everything we knew about Baizhu pre-release (for how little that was) were that he was a kind, selfless doctor who didn't want others to see his weakness, but in secret was striving for immortality in order to save his own life from his severe illness. Qiqi seemed to be someone he observes to further his research in gaining said immortality, but his love and care for her still feels sincere, although he can never properly convey this in words because, to me at least, he's keeping himself at a distance from her and others so as to not hurt them too much if he passed away. Baizhu tearing out Qiqi's journal entry about him being a good person so that she doesn't dwell on and remember such things about him seemed to support this, as well.

Upon release, we also had Dainsleif's lines about Baizhu in his collected miscellany video, which made me emotional as well: Dain, someone who is cursed with and suffers daily from immortality that he never asked for, respects Baizhu's desire for immortality himself, because for him it would be freedom from the pain and suffering he already experiences, seemingly. Most people want immortality for selfish reasons, but for Baizhu, I thought, it's out of a desire to save his very life, and in turn save more people as a doctor in the future. It's human, understandable, and the mark of an incredibly caring and altruistic person, and Baizhu wanting to heal himself is something to be sympathized with, especially if you can relate to his pain.

This part in particular from his demo was so powerful to me: the defiance of his fate, of his death, and the display of his continued strength of will and resolve, and even skill in battle, no matter how physically weak he may be. Though he still has his doubts and his guilt, here he says "I will not die, I will beat the odds, and no one can decide my fate for me, nor can they shake my resolve."

All of this only made me love him more and more. I was hoping we would get to see his insecurities and fears about his condition and his possible fate, and that he would learn to allow himself to be cared for by those who loved him — to realize at least a little bit more that he will never be a burden on others, because the guilt over such things is all too real for someone with a disability or chronic illness. His non-spoiler voice lines were so comforting and hopeful, and I wanted his story to be hopeful as well, without going as far as to magically cure him like what unfortunately happened with Collei.

That was what I wanted. More or less, that was what I expected, especially with the copious other examples of the "overworked character learns they need to take a break and feel supported by the traveler" storyline in Genshin insert the waifu baizhu (waifzhu?) jokes here.

And then, I played Baizhu's story quest.

.....No image in the world can fully sum up exactly how I felt after that, but, well, I think Paimon here is the closest I can get.

I still remember it like it was yesterday. I remember standing there, at the bottom of the steps leading up to the pharmacy where the end of the quest left me, not knowing how to feel. Feeling completely numb. Feeling like I'd just gotten punched in the gut a million times over. Feeling sick. Call me overdramatic, too overly attached to fiction, whatever, but no words can possibly convey just how much the revelations about Baizhu in his quest fucked me up. I did not feel good for quite a few days after playing it, as it haunted me, as I turned it over and over again in my mind. Not just the information given itself, but how it was given; the entire tone of it all. At some point I was finally able to make myself cry, and it was only then that I felt at least marginally better. But I'd be lying if I said that I've ever truly and fully processed and let sunk in everything to do with Baizhu, even a year later.... and I doubt that I ever will.

Don't get me wrong: Baizhu's story quest is without a doubt one of the best story quests in the game so far, and that's not at all bias speaking. It's short, to the point, uses npcs effectively and in a way that helps develop the main character instead of taking all the spotlight over them, and it leaves setup for more story in the future. For a Baizhu fan, it's the best quality one could ask for. It's the most we've ever learned about him, the most screentime he's ever had, and it emotionally and tenderly shows exactly what kind of person he is, and why he is the way he is, and does the things he does.

It's also absolutely horrific, and to this day I'm still not entirely certain exactly what message the writers wanted the player to take away from it by the end.

The quest introduces us to a boy and his father, Ayu and Jialiang, the latter of whom Baizhu wishes to treat, partly as a personal favor to his late master and to said master's other past disciple, the mother of the family, Jiangli. Through Baizhu's handling of their case, and talking to Hu Tao, we learn that Baizhu is not only obsessed with attaining immortality, but that he supposedly uses less-than-reputable methods to heal patients, methods that he keeps tightly under wraps. This, along with all the strange research he does that seemingly has nothing to do with the medical field, has given him a suspicious reputation — the game subtly lampshading the fandom seeing him as nothing more than a sketchy snake doctor ever since the beginning — but no one has ever been able to dig deep enough to find any proof that he has any ulterior motives, not even Yelan; thus, the ultimate consensus is that he truly must be nothing more than a kind and benevolent doctor who has his patients' best interests at heart, no matter what else he's doing in the background. Upon Baizhu treating Jialiang for the first time, however, we’re directly confronted with this secret, dubious healing method he uses, and what exactly it means for Baizhu, as with all the masters that came before him.

To say my stomach dropped here would be an understatement, because I knew exactly what this meant. And sure enough, not a few minutes later in the quest, we get the dreaded truth:

Baizhu’s poor physical condition is not from natural causes; rather, he is as weak as he is because he’s made himself that way. Changsheng is a former adeptus he made a contract with, that allows the host to transfer some of their own life force from themselves to someone else, using Changsheng as the conduit. The contract is meant to strengthen the body of the host and extend their lifespan, however these advantages effects are outweighed by Baizhu, and all his predecessors before him, repeatedly giving away their life force to heal others, causing them to become frail and inevitably die young. The contract has always been used in this way, and all of its prior users all met the same untimely end; Baizhu is at no less risk of that.... which is why he wants to become immortal, so he can continue to heal people with the forbidden arte without fear of death.

This would already be a Lot as it is. Trading away one's life force to save another isn't exactly a brand new trope, but the idea of a doctor doing it over and over again to save lives when all else fails, even to the detriment of their own body.... It's the ultimate act of selflessness, of kindness, of sacrifice. It's touching. It's laudable. It's devastating, to a degree one can't even imagine.

Because Baizhu doesn't just stop there, as we find out at the end of the quest.

How do you expect me to read this—

and additionally this—

and also this...

...and not have it occupy my mind 24/7, sending me in a downward never-ending spiral of existential horror, for all of eternity?? just like Baizhu himself—

While it's heavily implied that all the contract users prior to Baizhu only ("only") used it one-way, to give their own life force to others, Baizhu has taken it a step further, and also been using Changsheng to transfer his patients' diseases and illnesses onto himself. This likely is a more effective way of "curing" some of them entirely, instead of simply delaying their symptoms' worsening with more life force, although he cannot take on the worst of them/terminal illnesses of course. But he has taken on so, so many, so many diseases and so many symptoms, all compounding and blending together to the point that Jiangli, another doctor just as skilled as Baizhu, cannot even distinguish them all or recognize some of them, that he might as well be terminal. Not only does Baizhu do this for the sake of his patients, but he's also using his body as a human petri dish, testing different diseases and poisons on himself to see how they interact with each other, both to create more effective medicines and understand the mechanisms of the human body better, and to perhaps find the secret to immortality.

This reveal at the end of the quest is presented as an awe-inspiring, poignant twist, that's meant to make you see Baizhu in a brand-new light. The animated cutscene is tear-jerking, bittersweet, yet beautiful, as we finally come to understand the full scope of just who Doctor Baizhu is, just how truly pure and selfless he is, and just how much he has sacrificed, and plans to sacrifice forevermore. Many people who weren't fans of Baizhu or were neutral on him had their minds completely changed upon this bombshell being dropped, it rightfully clearing away any and all misunderstandings about him somehow being a bad person, and fostering newfound respect for him. That's the best word to use for how the game portrays all this: respectable. Baizhu's situation is tragic, but his actions are nevertheless shown and seen as beautiful, and admirable. His self-sacrifice is to be praised, and honored, because he is doing it for the good of so many others, because his heart is just that big, and that caring. It's bittersweet, but Baizhu is determined, and we should respect his resolve.

But should we really?

Yelan would disagree, I believe. Which is ironic, considering that in her own story quest, Baizhu transfers poison into himself from Uncle Tian with her there, and she is none the wiser.

Just... really stop and think about the implications of what Baizhu is doing to himself, and the life he lives. Try to imagine it, how it would feel, to be inundated with that many diseases and toxins, to the point that all of your internal organs are diseased; to the point that you have every symptom imaginable, sometimes all at once. Now, take that, and imagine living that kind of hell with it progressively worsening, for all of eternity, as Baizhu wants to do.

You can't fathom it. To say that it's beyond human comprehension is an understatement. And yet, that is Baizhu's reality, every single day, and if he has his way, for the rest of time.

This is not okay.

What truly frightens me about Baizhu, is how.... empty he feels. He is kind, gentle, nurturing, and a bit flamboyant and mischievous at times, but he has essentially no personality traits or life outside of "being a doctor". All of his voicelines involve him giving health advice, or looking after us or others, or discussing the troubles he encounters in the medical field, or his hobbies, which involve... making medicine. While there's nothing wrong per se with a doctor truly enjoying their job — it's what makes Baizhu such a good caretaker, after all — their life and personality never revolves entirely around that. People have their own lives outside of their professions, that don't involve said professions, even the most enthusiastic and genuine of workers. But Baizhu..... doesn't have anything else. For Baizhu, being a doctor is all that he is.

Nothing is more subtly chilling than this joke Changsheng makes (that gets reinforced by Paimon later), where she calls Baizhu her "mannequin" — and especially the way that Baizhu doesn't comment on it at all, merely continuing to look like a guilty child getting scolded for being reckless. Because a mannequin is an eerily accurate description of Baizhu: he is not a person of his own, but merely a vessel for her power. "Baizhu" does not exist outside of his role as a healer; he has no other life, no other aspirations, no other joys and things to care about, nothing. Even though he's a pillar in Liyue Harbor that is beloved by the community, especially by the children, he's also in a sense practically a ghost: he is never seen outside of taking care of people in some way, because he never lets anyone see him at his sickest, and he has no sense of self outside of that role as a doctor. He is distanced from everyone, almost as though he was already immortal.... he could die at any time, frighteningly easily, and to him, no one would notice or care. As depressing as it is, even Qiqi, a literal zombie, is more alive and has a much more fulfilling life at this point than Baizhu does.

Many of Baizhu's voicelines are dripping with casual self-deprecation, and others with extreme hypocrisy, where he will express frustration and disappointment at others not being diligent in taking care of themselves, completely oblivious to his own extreme levels of self-harm and self-sacrifice. Of course, as mentioned earlier, feelings of inadequacy and being a burden are tragically not unusual for someone with significant health problems, but it goes far, far beyond this for Baizhu, before he was ever ill — all the way back to his childhood. Baizhu's hometown was struck by a plague when he was young, from which he was seemingly one of the only survivors, and his obsession with wanting to save each and every life he comes across that needs saving, no matter the cost to himself, is likely born from the trauma and extreme survivor's guilt that the event instilled in him. It was during this plague that he encountered his former master, and in training under and being influenced by him, he adopted these harmful mentalities (through no fault of his or his master, to be clear), without ever being given any other way to cope with his pain, other than to do everything in his power to never let anyone else die ever again.

Again, Yanfei sums it up best.

The true tragedy of Baizhu is that, although he wholeheartedly agrees with his late master's sentiment, and truly believes that he himself is headed down a different path from his predecessors, at the end of the day, he is no different from them, nor is his chosen path any different from theirs. As he states, those with the most altruistic and purest of hearts are the ones seduced by the contract, and he, too, has fallen victim to Changsheng's siren song: the allure of reaching beyond human means to prevent death. He believes he has found the solution to the conundrum of saving both the world at large and the one doing the saving, but he's merely fallen into the trap just like all the others: even if he doesn't die, he is still sacrificing himself, cursing himself to a fate unimaginably worse than death itself. After all, as he says, the contract can't erase pain from the world entirely, but merely transfer it from one place to another, and Baizhu is living proof of that. If his master could see what he's doing, he most definitely would be heartbroken at the "answer" Baizhu has found, because a life isn't saved if it's merely surviving, and not living.

All of this began from Baizhu, selfless and benevolent as he is, wishing to save a snake. Changsheng is a dear friend, a being so closely intertwined with his very soul, and his closest connection to his late master, and yet she is also the very thing that's killing him, and will inevitably be his doom, in whichever way that comes. Baizhu being who he is means he will never abandon her, and Changsheng will never leave him as well, her worry over the fate of her host overwhelmed by her fear of death and her desire to live on, which is how the contract has persisted for six generations. It is a toxic bond, and yet their care for each other is too great, both parties accepting the misery that awaits them. Changsheng knows that any of the cycles could be her last, but cannot help but seek out new ones in order to continue living — and Baizhu intends to make that "last" be a reality, by living forever, to make sure that Changsheng will also never die, but also that no one else can take on the contract after him. He wants his cake and to eat it too, wishing to save anyone and everyone — and he fully believes that he can. He believes that he is headed towards the light of the moon, escaping the flames of the sun.

But the moon is still ever-so-far away regardless. Perhaps even impossible to reach, if Teyvat's sky truly is fake. No matter where he aims, even if he isn't burned, Baizhu is destined to fall eventually, if he keeps going the way he is. Many people have tried to warn him, to convince him that immortality isn't what he deserves, to convince him of how much he's loved... but Baizhu is too stubborn; too, ironically, selfish in his selflessness. He insists he has everything under control, that he won't let himself die... but how can anyone believe that, when all the signs suggest that he's already on death's door? And even if he does get his wish, and be granted immortality, will he truly be content like he thinks he will, endlessly suffering with only Changsheng by his side?

I don't think the writers ever intended to glorify Baizhu's actions, or at least, I don't think it occurred to them that it could be read in that way. I do still mean it when I say he is one of the best-written characters in the game, because there is so much care given to him in his story quest and to his lore, even if, frustratingly and tragically, Hoyoverse as a whole doesn't seem to care about him at all. He's so fun to play as, and in isolation, it makes me very happy to have a canonically disabled playable character. But I'm also so, so haunted by him, and I think more people would be as well, if the game didn't gloss over the incredibly bleak reality of Baizhu and his symptoms due to the overall lighthearted tone of Genshin. I desperately need to see where they're going to take his arc, if they intend to at all, because there is so much potential for it, and right now it's very much up in the air. I don't want him to die, as I fear he's close to, but I need him to heal, and finally learn that he's done enough, and that he can finally, finally, stop. Stop torturing himself, and finally accept for himself all the love he's given others for so long now, and live. I want Baizhu to live more than anything, and not the way he is now, nor as a cursed immortal. I want him to live, and thrive, and truly, unapologetically, be himself (whoever that "Baizhu" is), and be happy.

He already has someone worth living for, right here, aside from Changsheng. He has a daughter, a family, who love him, not to mention an entire city, and and I dearly wish he could realize that. I wish he could know how comforting he is to me and so many others, and how important he is to us, not because of what he can do, but because of his beautiful heart. 💔

Happy Birthday, Baizhu. Thank you for being such an incredible healer on my team, and I hope we'll see you in Chenyu Vale one day :')💚