#how the man she loved became part of the salvation of the world and YET AND YET—!

[impossible-rat-babies]

haha what if ahah the final days messed up charon even more—that the sorrow and loss and carrying all those dead left an impression on her soul that lasts all the way to eyrie

[pinkestlittlebutterfly]

Chapter 136 is out and while it’s generally smart to wait for a translation to say anything Deep about it I’m just Not Going To Do That and simply put a disclaimer right here at the beginning of my ramblings to tell all of you that everything I say might be incorrect and to please take it with a grain of salt. 

Anyways among the many, many things this chapter reveals I want to talk about Lily’s preferences regarding Puccini’s operas. 

Again provided that my wonky attempts at understanding didn’t fail me, in these panels Lily tells Misono about how Mikage used to take him to see Puccini’s operas, and how, allegedly, Mikage liked “Madama Butterfly”, but Lily preferred “Turandot”. Strike Tanaka loves their literary references, of course, and I love talking about Lily, so let’s take a look at those works. 

Summarised very shortly, “Madama Butterfly” is the tale of Ciocio-san, referred to as Butterfly, married to an American at a young age, who desires her for her beauty. When he abandons her for three years, she holds onto her love for him, until he returns with his new, American wife, which prompts her to kill herself in despair. “Turandot”, on the other hand, tells of the cruel, cold-hearted princess of the same name, who swore an oath to only marry a man who solved her three riddles and have those who fail beheaded. Over the course of her story she is challenged by a young prince who answers her riddles but ultimately places his life in her hands, until she eventually falls in love with him. 

Both of these stories are much more complex than that, of course, but summarising them properly would go way beyond how long I wanted this post to be and I will just recommend you check them out if you haven’t yet. The point I want to make is that both “Madama Butterfly” and “Turandot” are, at their core, stories about love: Butterfly believes in love with her whole heart but finds hers empty and worthless, while Turandot rejects love until she sees it at its most strong and gives in to it, granting her a happy end. Love is misery and grief to Butterfly, but salvation to Turandot. 

In chapter 136, Lily also talks about love when Misono calls him out on how he is not being very true to his name “All of Love”, suggesting that despite his stance of “everyone is born to be loved” back in volume four, he never really believed in love in the first place and only ever stood for loveless lust. 

That is, again, assuming I read this part correctly. 

But Lily prefers “Turandot” to “Madama Butterfly”, he prefers the story of a love so warm and true it melts the princess’ ice heart to that which – at least with how he presents himself in this chapter – should be much closer to how he feels about it all. And it might just be mentioned in a throwaway line, but I think it was placed in this chapter on purpose. I think that Lily, like most of us, likes stories that are not about how he thinks the world is, but how he wishes it to be – Lily wants to believe in a love like that Turandot experienced, even as he tries to deny it. 

This is also not the first time that “Turandot” is brought up. “Turandot” is the name of the spell Lily is using to keep himself and Misono trapped on the chess board; the first technique that Misono developed upon becoming Lily’s Eve. In a way, the princess Turandot becomes reminiscent of how Lily positions himself in the game the two of them are playing – a cold-hearted creature, unyielding to love, and cruel in how he rejects it. 

But I think there’s a little Butterfly in him as well.

We don’t know a lot about Lily’s backstory yet, and I am really mostly speculating at this point, but as it’s been with Kuro and Ildio and Hugh, to become a Servamp one’s body must be primed by sin. Like Butterfly, I think Lily has been the victim of loveless lust once – it’s just that he didn’t get the luxury of dying. He became Turandot, somewhere along the way, and how it happened is (hopefully) for the coming chapters to reveal. 

Turandot found love to soften her heart in the end, and I think Lily will be able to do the same. He already has a prince to challenge him, after all. I don’t think he’s being all that honest with Misono, I think he’s trying to rile him up, to inspire hate and rejection, but Misono has grown strong and smart enough to figure him out. And I honestly can’t wait to see it. 

[thatlovinfeelin]

Flightless Bird | twenty | Bradley Rooster Bradshaw

Synopsis: Josephine Wilson Miller is alone for the first time in her life. She got married after her first year of college and became a housewife, but that life is gone now. So she runs to San Diego, to her childhood best friend Jake, where she meets the man who could very well be her salvation.

series warnings: unplanned pregnancy, just pregnancy in general, talks of infertility. past mental and emotional abuse. anxiety. talks of women's reproductive systems (idk)

Jose’s heart was in your throat as she watched Bradley get dressed the following morning. She wasn’t ready for him to leave yet. She wanted more time, she needed more. But he had to go, she knew that. She just wished he could stay longer. 

“Don’t look at me like that,” he sighed, putting his hands on his hips. 

“I can’t help it,” She mumbled. 

He stood there for a second before climbing onto the bed. He reached for her, kissing her gently. He didn’t want to go either, but he had a job to do, for a little while longer at least. Soon enough he would be back here, if all went according to plan. He wanted to be back here with her, and her little girl. He wanted to live across the street again and be more than just some random man at an air show. 

“I don’t want to go either,” he admitted, “But I have to, baby.”

“I know,” She pouted, “Just wish I could keep you here for a little while longer.”

He smiled, “I wish I could keep you right here, like this.”

“Only because I’m naked,” You laughed, pulling the blanket up higher, “I need to get dressed too. Jake will be back with Wren before too long.”

“I can’t wait to meet her someday,” He said almost dreamily. 

She smiled and stroked Bradley’s cheek, the one with all of the scars. There was once a time when she wanted to kiss every one of those scars and make him feel as loved as he was. She did that last night as they tangled in the sheets. 

“You’re going to love her,” Jose told him, “She’s amazing.”

“Just like her mom, I’m sure.”

A blush rose on Jose’s cheeks. She wasn’t used to being complimented in the way that Bradley always seemed to make her believe it. It’d been years since she’d heard him, and now she wasn’t sure how she was going to let him walk out of her door again. The last time he swore he’d never be back, what if this turned into a one time deal and she never saw him again?

How would she be able to breathe without him again? She didn’t like being dependent on people, but she felt like she needed Bradley in her life to feel complete. Like he was some sort of missing piece that she didn’t know she needed until he was gone again. 

“It feels complete when you’re here,” She mumbled, chasing his lips again. 

“I know, baby, I know,” He seemed to agree, “It just feels right being here with you. I don’t know how I’m going to leave you again.”

“I don’t know how I’m going to let you go,” She replied, “If I didn’t have Wren…”

“But you do, and I’m so glad that you do, sweetheart,” He shushed her gently, “She’s your world. And maybe one day she can be a very big part of mine.”

“I’d like nothing more.” 

He grinned, the smile stretching across his whole face. They were locked into an embrace, clutching onto one another as if the other would disappear. Maybe he would…just disappear into the skies. Or maybe he would come back to them and they could be a little family again. Maybe she could have the life she wanted with Bradley and everything would turn out okay. 

His phone rang from her dresser, causing him to groan. He let go and stretched over, reaching for the device. His shoulders sank when he read the message on it. 

“I have to go, like right now,” He sighed, “I wish we had more time.”

“We will,” Jose swore, “We’ll have all the time in the world.”

He nodded and bent down to kiss her again. When they pulled apart, she reached for her robe again, tying it around her waist before following him through the house. It felt strange to be doing this after all this time. Yet it also felt right somehow. If they were leaving things like this, this would be the right way to do it. 

“I’ll come back to you,” He promised, dropping his forehead to rest against hers, “I’ll come back to both of you.”

“I’ll hold you to that,” She tried to joke, “Fly safe.”

“I always do.”

“I love you, Bradley.”

He kissed her softly, his mustache tickling her lips, “I love you so much Jose.”

“Come back to me,” She begged him, “Come back home.”

“I will, my love. I promise.”

With that he was climbing into his rental car and driving away, taking Jose’s heart with him. She had her hand over her heart, trying to feel the steady beating of it, hoping it would help ground her. But it did little to help. 

But she knew that Wren would be home soon, and that would give her purpose. Wren was her whole life. Her everything. Her life wouldn’t have nearly as much purpose without having Florence. She couldn’t imagine life without her. 

So when she heard Jake pulling into the driveway she couldn’t help but smile and run towards the front door to hug her daughter. Wren came bursting through the door, yelling for her mother. Jose dropped to her knees and held her arms wide open. 

“Were you good for Uncle Jake and Auntie Nat?”

“Yes ma’am!” Wren cheered, “We had twea pwarty”

“A tea party? That sounds like fun.”

“It was honestly,” Jake said from behind you, “Get kiddo, why don’t you take your bag in your room. Your mama and I need to talk for a minute.”

“Otay!”

Jose stood and turned around, crossing her arms out of habit, “What’s up?”

“Phoe told me something last night and I need you to not be mad,” He said carefully, “I wouldn’t be able to handle it if you were mad at us.”

���Jake, what’s up? What’s wrong?”

He looked nervous, so nervous. He picked at his hands and wouldn’t make eye contact with her, he was even chewing on his lips. Jose hadn’t seen him like this in years. It was making her worried, something had to be wrong. Maybe something happened with Wren overnight? 

“You’re scaring me, Jake,” Jose took a step forward and put a hand on his arm. 

“She’s pregnant,” Jake blurted out, “Fuck, she’s pregnant.”

“I know.”

“Are you mad? God please don’t be mad. I can’t handle this if you’re mad at me,” He rambled on, “I don’t know what the fuck I’m going to do. I don’t know how to be a dad, I’m barely a good uncle. How do I be a father?”

“Jake,” Jose said softly, “Calm down. It’s okay.”

“You aren’t mad?” He questioned.

Jose’s heart nearly broke. He looked so wounded, so scared. So Jose reached out and hugged him tightly. As tightly as she could, he slowly started to relax in her arms. She thought back to how she was when she first moved out here, and how Jake comforted her. 

“I’m not mad, Jakey,” She whispered, “How could I be mad about this?”

“Because you always wanted more kids,” He said, as if that was the only reason that mattered, “We weren’t even trying.”

“Jake, you’re going to be a dad, how could I be mad about that? You’re going to be an amazing father.”

“I don’t know how to be a good dad,” he stated, “Mine is shit.”

“Yeah, he is, which is why you’re going to be amazing,” She replied, “And you’re an amazing Uncle, which is an even better reason as to why you’re going to be amazing.” 

“How do you know?”

“Because you told me the same thing when I was pregnant with Wren,” She replied honestly, “You told me I would be so much better than my mother, because I’d never want my kid to go through the same things that I did.”

“I have no idea what I’m doing,” he admitted. 

“No parent ever does,” She shrugged in response, “We just have to hope we don’t screw our kids up too badly and do our best.”

“Seems like there should be more to it,” He groaned. 

“I’ll loan you both some of the parenting books I read while I was pregnant, but for the most part it’s trial and error.”

“I don’t do well with that.”

Jose could hear Wren playing in the other room, talking to her teddy bear that Jake bought her before she was even born. Yes, she always wanted more children, but she was beyond happy to have Wren. She wouldn’t trade her for a minivan full of kids. 

“Are you happy about this?” Jose asked Jake. 

He stopped for a moment before a smile broke out across his face, “I’m over the fucking moon. I can’t wait to see Nat as a mom, I know she’s going to be amazing.”

“No doubt the primal part of you can’t wait to see her really pregnant,” Jose joked. 

“That too. Fuck, we did that, you know? Like we’ve created this whole new life.”

“I know, it’s crazy to think about,” Jose agreed, “I remember how stunned I was when Wren started moving and I could feel her. It became real all of the sudden.” 

“I’m gonna have a kid,” He said, a stunned smile on his face. 

“Yeah, Jake, you are.”

Wren picked that time to come running back out with a piece of paper in her hands. She ran to Jake and tugged on the leg of his jeans. He smiled down at her before bending down so he was on eye level. That was one thing he always did, he got on eye level with her so he was never talking down to her. It always made Jose smile, no matter what was going on.

“What’s up, munchkin?” He questioned, combing through her wild hair. 

“I dwew you somfing,” She held up her paper, with colorful squiggles all over it. 

“What’s this? Huh? You wanna tell me about it?” He asked her, gently grabbing the paper from her. 

“You fwying!” She cheered, pointing to the top of the page, “And Mawma and me and Auntie Nat watching!”

“That’s amazing, Kiddo! Can I put this in my locker at work so I can look at it before I fly everyday?” He asked, to which she nodded quickly. 

“Show everyone?” She asked.

“Yeah Munchkin, I’ll show them all! Gotta show off something my favorite girl made,” He leaned forward and kissed the top of her head, “I love you, Wrennie.”

“I wuvs you!” 

She placed a big wet kiss on Jake’s cheek and smiled as big as she could before turning around and running off again. Jose’s heart was warm from watching the two of them interact. She couldn’t help but wonder how Bradley would be around her, would she like him? Would he like her? 

“I saw Bradshaw driving away,” Jake mentioned slowly, “You wanna talk about that?”

“Do you want to hear about it?” Jose raised an eyebrow. 

“Based off of the freshly fucked look you have, I don’t think so,” Jake gagged, “Are you two a thing again?”

“Yeah…I think we are.”

“Good, it’s about damn time y’all sorted it out.”

Jake was right, it was about damn time.

[theredengineapologist]

Introducing the world of TTTE: Sudrian Boys [TTTE: Sudrian Boys AU Worldbuilding, Pt. 1]

Now that I've worked out exactly what I want from my AU, I believe it is finally time to share the lore with all of you (one month after I initially promised it OOPS).

The lore of this world is a bit HEFTY to explain, so I'm breaking it into multiple parts. This part mainly goes over the history and background for my Humanized!TTTE AU, TTTE: Sudrian Boys. In later parts, I plan to cover things like Sudrian vs Non-Sudrian Engine culture, how the engines differ from humans, and more info about how the shapeshifting works in my AU, so stay tuned!

Also! Information regarding specific characters will be included in separate character sheets I will be posting at a later date. I'm also currently working on some fanfics that I hope will expand my AU further. But feel free to ask me any questions you may have!

This is going to be a VERY long post so read on under the cut!

Before we begin, some key things to keep in mind:

I am still actively catching up with the canon source material at this point in time! Thus, aspects of my AU are subject to change as I read/watch more of the source material and incorporate it into my AU.

This AU is primarily based on TV series canon (both model and CGI), as that is what I am primarily familiar with. Some aspects are also taken from the Railway Series to help estimate an approximate timeline of events.

At this current point in time, BWBA is NOT canon in my AU. This is mainly because I have not watched it yet and have no plans to watch it later (with the exception of the Michael White episodes that everyone says are good). The episode "A Shed for Edward" from Season 21 is also NOT canon in my AU. This is to say that in my AU, Edward and Henry still live in Tidmouth. It's my AU. I do what I want.

On that note, Thomas and the Magic Railroad is partially canon in my AU. I haven't gone back to re-watch the movie yet (I do plan to at a later date), so I'm going purely off of memory and what I hear other people say about it. Because of this, I've decided to basically just take parts that I like and leave behind parts that I don't. In regards to the canonicity of the film itself, I consider it as a dream Thomas had (that may or may not have actually happend. It'll all make sense later).

With the exception of Philip the Diesel Boxcab, ALL of the engines are adults in my AU. Yes, that includes Thomas and Percy.

With that out of the way, let's start at The Beginning:

A long time ago, when humans were designing the first steam engines, a young faerie fell in love with them. Her true name is beyond mortal comprehension, but engines of today refer to her as Lady (or alternatively, the Lady of Legend).

Though fae are usually associated with nature, this faerie in particular was fascinated by machines and the ingenuity of mankind. And so she used her magic gold dust to breathe life into the machines that she loved so much.

And thus she became Lady, Goddess of Steam Engines.

For many years, engines and humans lived together in harmony. The engines found purpose in being useful, and humans were able to travel longer distances and distribute supplies amongst each other. It was a mutually beneficial relationship.

But then, everything changed when the fire nation attacked dieselization happened.

Lady watched in horror as humanity turned their backs on the steam engines that worked so hard for them. In increasingly larger numbers, engines were getting scrapped for as petty reasons as "not being useful enough". In an effort to protect her beloved machines, Lady imbued them with more powerful magic.

As much as Lady wanted to, the Fae Court wouldn't allow creations of man to be taken in mass to the fae realm. So if she couldn't offer her engines salvation, Lady would at least give them a means of escape.

By around 1960, as steam was getting phased out, Lady blessed her beloved machines with the ability to shapeshift. If an engine ever had a desire to leave the rails, all they had to do was imagine themselves doing so and they could walk the Earth in a human-like form. This would allow them live lives completely independent from mankind. Being "really useful" was no longer a requirement to have a right to live, now they could simply exist and pursue goals of their own choosing just as any human could.

For steam engines all around the world, shapeshifting became a secret and closely guarded practice that they would only discuss amongst each other. Humans were not to be made aware of this under any circumstances.

Unfortunately, even after Lady bestowed the gift of shapeshifting upon her engines, hundreds of them were still killed under the cutter's torch. Steam engines are proud entities after all, and many of them preferred to die upon their rails than to live in hiding as something foreign. And since shapeshifting was such a closely guarded practice, not every engine who may have wanted a way out was able to be taught.

Even so, there were still reports circulating of engines vanishing from scrapyards without a trace, almost as if by magic. These were the engines that managed to escape and are now living secretly amongst humans to this day.

Fast Forward many, many decades later. We return to the Island of Sodor:

It is now the late 2010s to mid 2020s. The entire Island of Sodor basically runs as a giant heritage railway.

The NWR is currently run by Sir Topham Hat III, who is at the strapping young age of 83. (I saw this tweet from someone who asked Christopher Awdry if STH III is still running the railway and he said yes so we're going with that.) STH III loves his engines very much, which is why he has no plans on retiring any time soon. Still, he has STH IV shadow him closely in order to prepare him to take over the railway some day.

Because of the success of both The Railway Series books and the Thomas and Friends TV show, tourists flock from all over the world to get a look at the famous engines. Plus, being one of the few places to still have steam engines in operation (and so many of them in fact), you can count on many of the tourists being train enthusiasts too.

Basically, the engines of Sodor are all treated like celebrities. They are FAMOUS and are generally adored by the public. Whenever they go anywhere, you can count on someone knowing their names.

And because of just how many tourists come to Sodor every year, the economy is thriving and the engines are all very, very busy. Everything is pretty idyllic.

But sometimes, prosperity can get pretty boring.

And now, our story begins:

As with many Sudrian Shenanigans, everything starts with Thomas the Tank Engine.

One night, after Thomas delivers passengers to a carnival, he makes a wish to leave life on the rails, even if only for just one night.

As much as Thomas loves working on his branch line, delivering goods and passengers from place to place, and meeting tourists, doing the same routine for literal DECADES can get a little dull.

While waiting for his driver and fireman to return from a short break, Thomas let his mind wander. He imagined himself as a human person taking part in the festivities with the passengers he just delivered. In doing so, Thomas accidentally activated the dormant shapeshifting magic Lady had blessed him with many years ago.

When Thomas opened his eyes, he was literally much closer to his rails than he had ever been. The station platform was much higher up. And Annie and Clarabel were much bigger than he remembered. Thomas had accidentally turned himself into a small human man, just like he had seen in his imagination.

He freaked out a little at first. When they returned, his driver and fireman didn't recognize him. It was only after Thomas started going off about things that only he would know, details about events that happened decades ago, before they were born and had only heard about in stories, that they realized that this small human figure really was Thomas the Tank Engine.

They called Sir Topham Hatt III at once, explaining the situation. And while baffling and unbelievable, the truth was right before their eyes. They were at a loss for what to do, especially since Thomas didn't know how to turn back yet. They concluded to allow Thomas to enjoy the festival for now, let Edward take the passengers home that night, and have Thomas stay with STH's family until he could figure out how to return to normal.

While scary at first, Thomas did enjoy the festival that night. And he went home with STH in Annie and Clarabel. He got to see the island from a new perspective, and he very much enjoyed that.

STH III made Thomas's driver and fireman promise to keep this a secret for now until they could figure out what happened. But that ultimately didn't matter because Thomas went to say "hello" to Edward that night. By the next sunrise, every engine on the island heard exactly what happened to Thomas. Some told their crew, but most weren't believed. Even some of the engines didn't believe each other. But at the very least, every engine on the island knew something strange was afoot.

The news eventually reached Donald and Douglas, who swiftly made their way to Tidmouth Sheds. Coincidentally, STH was bringing Human!Thomas to Tidmouth to inform the rest of the Steam Team about what had happened.

It is at this moment that Donald and Douglas reveal that they knew about shifting for decades. It was how they managed to get to the island under the guise that there would only be one of them. They would take turns, one traveling as an engine while the other hid in their cab. The reason they both appeared on the island as engines is because they hoped the controller would be kind enough to keep them both (and he was!). If it hadn't worked out, they would have run away together as humans. Since things worked out in their favor, they didn't see a point in shapeshifting again. But now that their secret was out, they needed to keep it safe.

Donald and Douglas taught the Steam Team how to shapeshift, and the engines continued to teach each other until basically every engine on the island knew how to switch between the two forms comfortably. In exchange, however, only a limited number of humans could know about engine shifting. These include STH III, STH IV, and the engines' drivers and firemen. Basically, only those who really needed to know.

Nowadays, STH gives the engines a little extra time off during the day to explore their new forms. The Steam Team also has an apartment where they can live together as humans if they choose. Within a few months, most of the engines have gotten in the habit of shifting back and forth, exploring their world and learning new things about themselves.

Now in a new perspective, the adventures continue. 😉

[pogirosary]

What is Prayer? Why do we do it?

Prayer is communication between man and God, a two-way relationship in which man should not only talk to God but also listen to Him.  Just as we cannot hold a conversation with another person unless he can hear us, the very act of praying is an implicit recognition of the presence of God here with us. And in praying, we strengthen that recognition of the presence of God, which draws us closer to Him. That is why the Church recommends that we pray frequently and make prayer an important part of our daily lives. For the unbeliever, a prayer is a cry to know and have a relationship with the Living God. It is precious and sacred. Repentance and acknowledgment of Christ as Lord leads to walking in joy and fellowship with the One who made us (Romans 10:9-10). 

Another helpful way of understanding prayer comes from the Jesuit theologian Walter Burghardt, who once expressed contemplation/prayer as “taking a long, loving look at the real.” Let’s break this definition down into parts. First, prayer begins with taking a long look. It’s looking at reality like slow-motion cameras at a sporting event. We get the chance to slow down and to take a closer look, which may reveal to us things we might have otherwise missed in our fast-paced lives. Second, prayer is also a long, loving look. When I reflect on reality, do I look with harsh, judgmental eyes, or with the loving, tender, and merciful eyes of God? Lastly, in prayer we look lovingly at the real: the reality of my life and the world. We start with reality because God does so through the Incarnation. God undertakes the work of salvation not by fleeing human reality, but by entering into it. In the ultimate act of solidarity, God became one of us in the person of Jesus. And Jesus experienced all that reality encompasses: from joy and laughter to suffering and death. So we know that God can hold the messiness of our reality and of our world. God can handle whatever we express in prayer. Because love holds all things.

There are many promises in God’s Word to encourage us to pray, such as: “He shall call upon me and I will answer him: I will be with him in trouble; I will deliver him, and honor him” (Psalm 91:15); “And it shall come to pass that before they call, I will answer; and while they are yet speaking, I will hear” (Isaiah 65:24); “Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you” (Matthew 7:7). The Scriptures tell us that we are to pray for one another and also assure us that God hears and answers prayer.  

The Bible provides many examples of prayer and how to pray. These examples show ordinary men and women laying their hearts before God, seeking Him in humility and praise. The following are several prayers we can ponder today.

The apostle Paul exhorted his readers to “not be anxious but pray about everything” (Philippians 4:6). He also prayed that unbelievers would come to a saving knowledge of Christ (Romans 10:1). In fierce opposition, Peter and John prayed for courage to share the Gospel (Acts 4:29) and that God would perform wonders to glorify His Name (Acts 4:30).

The early church prayed over each other for healing (James 5:14-15) and the release of those in prison (Acts 12:5). They asked God for wisdom and discernment to carry out their work for the Lord (James 1:5, Philippians 1:9-10). The early church The early church also prayed to know the will of the God they served (Colossians 1:9) and for the ability to grasp the depth of their Savior’s love (Ephesians 3:17-19).

Mary prayed in awe and wondered over the news that she bear the Son of God The beauty and humility of her opening words still bring joy to our hearts today. “And Mary said: ‘My soul glorifies the Lord and my spirit rejoices in God my Savior, for he has been mindful of the humble state of his servant’” (Luke 1:46-48).

The last prayer of the Bible is short but filled with power and anticipation. The apostle John, confined to the Island of Patmos, penned these brief but hope-filled words. “Amen. Come, Lord Jesus!” (Revelation 22:20).

We pray to align our hearts with God and to seek His guidance in the moments of our days. We find wonderful examples of this in scripture—from Abraham to David to the prophets—but one of the most powerful examples is in King Hezekiah’s life.

King Hezekiah, a God-fearing King, ruled the Southern Kingdom of Judah after the horrific reign of King Ahaz. A tribute to Hezekiah’s depth of character is found in 2 Kings 18:5. “Hezekiah trusted in the LORD, the God of Israel. No one was like him among all the kings of Judah, either before or after him.”

After the evil of Ahaz, Hezekiah was a tremendous blessing to the people of Judah. He moved to destroy idol worship, removed the high places that distracted the people from Jerusalem, and even broke the bronze snake of Moses’ day because the people burned incense in its honor (2 Kings 18:3-4).

However, amid the good he was doing, Hezekiah was under intense scrutiny and pressure from the evil leader of Assyria, Sennacherib. The Assyrian King repeatedly sent delegations to mock and taunt the nation of Judah, telling the people not to be comforted or fooled by their leader, Hezekiah, because the destruction of their nation was assured. The mighty Assyrians had conquered every other nation around them—why not Judah (2 Kings 18:31-35)?

At one point, as the Assyrian delegation mocked Hezekiah’s commitment to God, they left their threats in a letter. The significance of Hezekiah’s response to this evil threat is life-changing. “Hezekiah received the letter from the messengers and read it. Then he went up to the temple of the LORD and spread it out before the LORD” (2 Kings 19:14).

As Christ-followers who long to seek God’s heart in all things, we mustn’t miss the magnitude of King Hezekiah’s actions. He took the letter—filled with terrifying details of certain destruction—and spread it out before the Lord.

Scripture doesn’t say this good king reread the letter and agonized over every word. He didn’t call endless meetings with his officials to discuss the horrifying details.

He read the letter. He went to the temple of God and placed the letter before the Source of all hope and deliverance. God heard his prayer, and the Kingdom of Judah was spared from the attack of the Assyrians (2 Kings 19:20-34).

Oh, how I love that God moved through the writers of scripture to record this hope-filled story for us today. And what a powerful, visual example of taking our fears and anxiety to our Heavenly Father.

We will face our own “Assyrian Army” on our earthly journey. This may include sickness, grief, job loss, heartache, betrayal, etc. But we can take it all to the One Who created us and knows us to our very depths.

Now read King Hezekiah’s amazing prayer in 2 Kings 19:15-19

"And Hezekiah prayed to the Lord: "Lord, the God of Israel, enthroned between the cherubim, you alone are God over all the kingdoms of the earth. You have made heaven and earth.  Give ear, Lord, and hear; open your eyes, Lord, and see; listen to the words Sennacherib has sent to ridicule the living God.  "It is true, Lord, that the Assyrian kings have laid waste these nations and their lands.  They have thrown their gods into the fire and destroyed them, for they were not gods but only wood and stone, fashioned by human hands.  Now, Lord our God, deliver us from his hand, so that all the kingdoms of the earth may know that you alone, Lord, are God."

As followers of Jesus, we are called to devote time to prayer and meditation over His Word. Reading the inspired Word of God and praying as we read is a treasured gift from our Creator. God promises peace to those who keep their minds on Him (Isaiah 26:3). Oh, to linger in quiet moments with Him! 

But there is a type of meditation in our unbelieving world that we should avoid because of its emptiness and potential dangers. Any practice that directs us to clear or empty our minds is suspect because we are called to fill our hearts and minds with God’s promises and precepts (Psalms 1:2). If our minds are “emptied,” as the world suggests, there is a potential danger for the intake and acceptance of thoughts and philosophies contrary to God’s Word.

Additional verses about godly prayer and meditation include Philippians 4:8, Psalm 19:14, Psalm 63:6, Psalm 104:34, and Psalm 119:15.

We learn vital aspects of prayer by following Jesus’ example in His years of ministry on this earth. From scripture, we know that Jesus prayed alone (Luke 5:16), He prayed with others (Luke 9:28), and He prayed for others (Matthew 19:30).

In Jesus’ earliest teachings on prayer, He begins by urging His disciples to pray with humility, not to be seen and admired. Matthew 6:5 reads, “And when you pray, do not be like the hypocrites, for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and on the street corners to be seen by others.” And in Matthew 6:7, Jesus focused on praying with humble simplicity, not with endless words and phrases. From there, He moves to the beloved model of prayer still recited around the world today, what we call, The Lord’s Prayer (Matthew 6:9-13). What a moment this must have been for Jesus’ disciples. To learn about prayer from the Author of their faith! 

In John 17, knowing His time of death was near, Jesus went to His Father in prayer. He prayed that the Father would be glorified through what was to come (John 17:1-5). He prayed for His disciples, that they would be protected and sanctified (John 17:6-18). And then, in a breathtaking moment of love and compassion, Jesus prayed for us. John 17:20-21 reads, “My prayer is not for them alone. I pray also for those who will believe in me through their message, that all of them may be one, Father, just as you are in me and I am in you. May they also be in us so that the world may believe that you have sent me.” And in the Garden of Gethsemane, before laying down His life for the redemption of sinners, Jesus lay His deepening sorrow before the Father. Three times He asked that, if possible, the path before Him could be changed (Matthew 26:39-44). But ultimately, for the joy set before Him (Hebrews 12:2), He surrendered to the will of God. “My Father, if it is not possible for this cup to be taken away unless I drink it, may your will be done” (Matthew 26:42). 

Even on the cross, Jesus prayed. He cried out to His Father seeking forgiveness for His persecutors (Luke 23:34), to express agony over the temporary separation from His Father (Matthew 27:46), and to breathe His last words as He laid down His life for us all (Luke 23:46).

What is prayer? Prayer is a priceless gift from a loving Father to His children. What a joy to walk each moment in close, sacred fellowship with our Creator. “Call to me and I will answer you and tell you great and unsearchable things you do not know” (Jeremiah 33:3).

Prayer is a treasured privilege and mainstay for those who belong to God through the saving work of Jesus’ death and resurrection. The gift of communing with our Creator—child to Father—is the anchor and cornerstone of our life’s journey. 

"Prayer is communication with God. It is not only talking to God, but it is listening to God. And we are to pray, first and foremost, because we are commanded to pray. It is an act of obedience. I may not always understand the process of prayer or the behind-the-scenes work of prayer, but God wants me to depend upon him and to ask him for those things that are needed most in life. Yes, God is going to give us good things. He's going to provide for us. But it's clear in scripture that we have not because we ask not. And they're just too many scriptures that tell us that we're to pray. And if we don't pray, we limit what God will choose to do in our lives. It is the process. And every time God answers prayer, it strengthens our faith. Every time we get an answer and God delivers in his own way, in his own time, we develop as disciples in Christ. So of all the things Jesus taught, he was a great preacher and communicator, obviously, but when the disciples came to him, they didn't say, 'Lord, teach us to preach.' They said, 'Lord, teach us to pray.' There was something about the prayer life of Jesus that was so powerful, so persuasive that these men wanted to know how do we pray like that. And so getting in touch with God, knowing God, growing in our faith, getting the things that we need, all of this comes from the hand of God. I believe in prayer, and not just the idea of prayer, but I believe God really answers prayer." - Dr. Jack Graham, PowerPoint Ministries

[itsyourchoicedevotionals]

Making Waves

“And the men were stunned with bewildered wonder and marveled, saying, What kind of Man is this, that even the winds and the sea obey Him!” Matthew 8:27AMPC

Jesus Christ, Son of God, Son of woman out in a boat. His disciples had spent one, two years with Him by the time He’d told the storm to cease. They’d seen people delivered of diseases and demons. Lepers had grown new body parts. Blind eyes saw for the first time. Ears were opened to hear the faintest sound. Tongues were loosed to say their first words. Dead people were raised to life. Before this storm, the disciples thought they knew He was Messiah, but the storm quieting down immediately blew them away. Now, they wanted to know what ‘kind’ of Man this was.

My aged mother lived with us. She pushed her walker around the neighborhood, chatting with neighbors. The neighbors weren’t believers.

When the tornado siren went off. Mike was watching the storm from his porch. The greenish-black sky was pouring down ‘car wash,’ heavy rain. Mom, on our porch, stuck her finger in the air and yelled into the storm, commanding the tornado to go back into the sky— in the name of Jesus Christ.

Later, Mike asked my daughter, ‘is your grandma a witch?’ He’d heard her tell the storm to quiet and the tornado to go back into the air. Moments later the sky lightened and danger was past. He frankly wanted to know what ‘kind’ of woman, Mom was. Bystanders become interested in the totally different ‘kind’ of people.

Rick Renner, on his program, has been touring Bible times Pergamum, teaching about how truly evil this seat of satan, (Revelation 2) was. Resembles closely in description to the sinful USA. Believers were led by Holy Spirit to Pergamum to start a church. Because Believers loved Jesus— they wouldn’t go to the bath houses where homosexual acts occurred in front of everyone. They also, didn’t go to the theater, sporting arenas, and other social spheres because every event was either to the death, or to make fun of other believers before torturing them and killing them. Nor could they find work to earn a living because of the fact they were believers. Yet, they founded a church where many from Pergamum became believers, choosing Christ over the evil they were accustomed to. What ‘kind’ of people were they?

Right now many believers are ‘rapture’ bound, believing the rapture will occur momentarily. They’re hunkered down, trying to make it through until then. But Jesus is still saying— “Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit” Matthew 28:19NIV. Until the harvest is brought in, there’ll be no ‘rapture’ to anywhere.

Why should anyone think what ‘kind of person,’ about us? Churches sugar coat the gospel to not offend anyone. Instead of making waves, we make compromises. Everything happening in our nation is because Believers have sat in our church pews—not proclaiming the gospel, while we allowed the world to become darker and darker— praising God, singing, praying for each other, and going home to do nothing about winning souls. We’ve judged the lost instead of loved the lost and showed them the way of salvation.

Yahweh told me to participate in the world and begin making waves. I feel led to volunteer one day a week for the political party closest to my tenets. This is brand new and TOTALLY out of my comfort zone. He says I need to show people I’m a different ‘kind’ of person.

How about where you live? Are you having rapture practice? Or are you displaying you are a different ‘kind’ of person? It’s your choice. You choose.

LET’S PRAY: Lord help us to not compromise. Embolden us to be a different ‘kind’ of person in the name of Jesus Christ I pray.

by Debbie Veilleux Copyright 2023 You have my permission to reblog this devotional for others. Please keep my name with this devotional, as author. Thank you.

[yhwhsdaughter]

pairing: trevor belmont x fem reader

content: forced vampirism, monster slaying, main character death, pining, angst, mention of animal death, usage of the word ‘assault’ to refer vampires feeding on reader

- this was meant as platonic soulmates but it can be seen as romantic too

“It hurts…”

Feet dragging across the rocky ground, you heard screeches of pain from behind, though they soon diminished. You could only focus on the pulsing sensation at the side of your neck; it was like fire rushing through your veins.

Preoccupied with your agony, Belmont was able to sneak up. He raised his whip, ready to kill off the last of the creatures when you suddenly turned, and with glossy eyes you said, “Help me…”

The whip managed to leave a thin horizontal line across your cheek as he pulled back, causing blood to drip out slowly. Now illuminated by the moon, Belmont saw the damage on you. Skin exposed by the ripped clothes showed multiple bite marks. Blood stained the corner of your lips.

She’s been infected..

Belmont didn’t see a monster but a scared woman who’d just been assaulted by vampires. He knew what she’d turn into, but he couldn’t kill her… not when she looked at him like this. Sunrise was approaching so he had to act fast.

Draping his cloak onto your form, Belmont proceeded to carry you into the nearest building, which so happened to be where the carnage had occurred. Upon recognizing the place, you began to panic, shaking and looking at him with distrust. “You’re safe. I killed every last of those bloodsuckers.”

The two of you stayed like that for a while, in that shitty stinking room. Eventually tiredness overcame your senses; Belmont felt weight settle on his shoulder. He wonder how a vampire could look so innocent whilst sleeping.

“Hungry…”

You felt parched; it felt like your throat had dried up, barely able to utter a word.

“I know.”

A rabbit was placed in front of you. Blinking at it, you directed a confused glance at the man. “I’m—this is.. for me?” He nodded. Taking the animal with traces of disgust, you raised it to your mouth. Blood gushed into your mouth; feeding made a horrible slurping that would certainly haunt you but there was relief amongst those troubling feelings.

You gulped every last drop, draining the poor creature of its life. Still, your hunger and thirst weren’t satiated. Biting your lip, you pondered on the next move. Because this man had saved you, daring to kill him or even feed off him seemed… rude. Not to mention, he seemed way stronger than you in terms of experience. Prior to this, you were a regular citizen. Maybe you could run away?

“Here.”

Trevor could see your turmoil. Most vampires needed to drain at least one human every time they fed—if they were being generous. They could survive weeks without blood but it made them weaker. Besides, it was older vampires who had this kind of self control. Newborns tended to be more unstable.

“Just take it before I change my mind.”

You did as told, though you were still unsure. Hesitating, you licked your lips before nearing towards the vein on his wrist.

Trevor let out a grunt when your fangs pierced him. Although you tried to be gentle, it was an uncomfortable feeling nonetheless. As he became lightheaded and you full, the mouth that was attached to his wrist removed itself with a ‘pop’.

After making sure he was alright, you asked for his name. “Trevor. Trevor Belmont.”

“Oh..”

“……”

“Oh! I’m (Name) (Surname).”

─── ☾☼☽ ───

“It’s dangerous.”

“I still-still want to go!”

The last remnants of sun were gone. Ever since your first encounter with the rugged monster hunter, you refused to part from him, following the latter like a lost puppy.

“I’m not much of a fighter.. b-but watch this!”

On cue, you punched the nearest tree, cracking it and making a sizable hole. You looked back proudly towards Trevor; except when you tried to pull your hand out, you were having difficulty.

“Ah. It’s stuck.”

Trevor couldn’t help but chuckle, walking away, clearly amused with your display of power. You pulled harder, “Hold on! Don’t leave me alone! It’s scary..” you muttered the last part while chasing after him. Despite being a creature of the night, the world and its evils still frightened you.

At the sound of a branch snapping, you yelped, grabbing a piece of Trevor’s cloak for security.

It shouldn’t have come as a surprise to Belmont when you punched a head clean off, practically decapitating one of the attackers. He might have been seriously injured if you had not intervened.

“Trevor.”

Gazing at you under the moonlight, he saw the hunger in your eyes as you held a man whom was still alive but struggling. His neck was exposed. Even so, you waited.

The Belmont turned away, giving you privacy to feed.

He knew that by allowing you to live, you would continue to take blood from others. Normally he wouldn’t feel soft towards a monster but whenever he thought of you, it was different.

His guilt was lessened when you drank from scum. Before putting the lives of innocents in danger, he would offer his own.

“Are you done?”

The corpse of the man was dropped unceremoniously as you joined Trevor, a light skip to your step.

─── ☾☼☽ ───

Despite adopting a nighttime lifestyle, Trevor was still human and had to conduct business during daylight hours.

He’d left your lodgings, which was an abandoned cottage, for a while. Nobody really passed through there anyway, so he thought you were safe. Worst came to worse, you could handle yourself. But as your self proclaimed protector, Trevor felt uneasy leaving you alone.

Maybe he should’ve listened to his gut because when he arrived, the door was wide open with dirty footprints leading in all the way to your coffin.

Two men had opened it—staring at the peaceful expression on your face, unaware that they were here to end you. To them it was obvious what you were. Even with that frilly white dress that made you look somewhat angelic, they couldn’t be fooled. As they raised their weapons to strike, Trevor used his whip. His sudden entrance startled them but it gave you the chance to wake up.

Eyes snapping open, you jumped onto the other man, taking both of you to the ground. His screams echoed shortly as you tore into his throat. The remaining one had no chance; Trevor left the room, closing the door on his way out, killing the light that entered and cutting off the way to escape.

Left alone with your prey, a smile crept up your face.

When you opened the door again, the dress which decorated your body was now stained red. There was hardly a clean piece on the material. Even so, you greeted Trevor with a hug.

“Trevor..”

“Yeah?”

“I love you.”

“M-me too..”

─── ☾☼☽ ───

Forty years passed in the blink of an eye.

“You should retire.”

“Belmonts don’t retire. The only rest they get is when they’re dead.”

“Well I don’t want you to die.”

“I have to, someday.”

“No you don’t.”

It’s been like this for the past few years; Trevor was sixty now. His body didn’t look that of an aging man, but the expression on his face did. He’d seen too much and as time passed, it was harder to fight monsters by himself.

Of course you’d noticed that and suggested turning him. It was an ongoing discussion; Trevor didn’t fancy the idea of living an eternal life but the thought of leaving this earth without you was disheartening. He didn’t say it but the situation tore him apart.

There was also the fact that he was too old for you; forty years to be exact. You’d maintained your youth, looking lovely as ever. His doubts were shot down when you immediately said that you didn’t care about that.

“I just want you.”

He always kept pushing the conversation away and you were patient. Trevor supposed that you could’ve taken him by force if you wanted and when he inquired, you told him it would be like violating him, robbing him of the choice you were never given.

As understanding as you were; the time would come for him to decide and confront you about it.

That time was now.

He should have been more careful, but there was nothing to be done about it now. Trevor watched as the sun slowly descended. Would you make it here before he passed? Would he die without seeing you one last time?

When you woke night had already fallen. Trevor wasn’t home; he’d been late plenty of times before but this occasion felt different.

Upon stepping outside, the smell of blood hit you. It reeked, staining the very air. You immediately recognized the source—how could you not? You’d fed from Trevor countless times.

Rushing in that direction, you prayed to whatever entity was listening to keep Trevor safe. The world and its gods could condemn you, but not him.

Not him.

You found him sprawled on a big rock, a creature hovering over his crumpled figure. Without thinking, you tore it to pieces. Blood rained as his mangled body flew to various parts of the forest.

“Trevor!!!”

He let out a groan, which would’ve made you sigh in relief but his visible injuries proved otherwise. You were no doctor and even if you could carry him into town, it would be too late. There was no other option. If you didn’t do anything, you might lose him.

“Trevor. Let me do it.”

Still conscious enough to reply, “I don’t want to become—”

“A monster?”

“I cannot become what I sought to destroy..”

Tears escaped your eyes, blurring the image of the person whom you treasure most. “Please.. please please please..! Don’t leave me alone!”

You begged, knowing it was unfair to pressure him in such way but you couldn’t bare the thought of existing if he wasn’t present. He was your salvation, your companion…your world. And yet, he was being robbed from you.

So soon… It’s too soon!

You always imagined Trevor living well into old age, spending the remainder of his life with you, being happy. He was destined to die peacefully, not like this. Not in this shitty place, by the hands of a shitty monster!

“I can’t. I’m sorry..”

Grabbing his hands, you lowered your forehead on them, crying your heart out. It was unfair. Life was unfair.

“Kiss me.”

Despite the pain that he was in, Trevor found it in himself to smile. For you. “Kiss me one last time.” Tears dropped slowly as you heard him. Shaking your head; you couldn’t kill him.

“I want it to be you..”

His words struck a chord.

Lifting him by the neck in a gentle manner, you pushed the collar of his shirt aside, exposing his carotid. As you bit into his familiar skin once more, your other hand caressed him, trying to make this goodbye as painless as possible.

With every sip you took, tears fell down.

I love you! I love you! I love you!

His warm hand turned cold.

You held him in your arms like he once did to you, with the outmost care, with the love he deserved.

Since Trevor didn’t say where he wanted his body to be buried, you chose the nicest spot. It was a secluded place where it wouldn’t be dug up by animals or people—but not so hidden either.

Whilst cleaning the blood that covered his body and face, you found a piece of cloth with writing on it. Staring at it, you recognized the Belmont insignia. Turning the material, you managed to read the words…

Take this. Go to Alucard.

Trevor must’ve written that in his final moments; probably in case he didn’t make it before you arrived. The letters were sloppy because of the blood but you could read it well.

Clutching it to your chest, you sobbed until the light of day began to burn. For a moment you wished to stay there and disappear. Perhaps you could join Trevor.

Together even in death..

─── ☾☼☽ ───

The journey was rather long.

Looming in all its glory, Castle Dracula. You looked at the last piece of your beloved, holding it tighter in your hand.

“Okay. Let’s meet this Alucard.”

[ackerfics]

Hi can i please request a soft coffe date with Levi and after the date reader and Levi go in the park sit on a bench reader falls asleep on Levi’s lap or shoulder (u choose) and he caries her bridal style to home he just slips in bed beside her but he wakes her up accidentally and like he says sorry like so many times but she just kisses him and snuggles in his chest.After that they are both asleep.Love your works so so much!💕

best part  — levi ackerman

— levi ackerman x female reader (modern au)

— warnings: none, just fluff <3

— summary: it’s your first anniversary with levi and he made it a day to look forward to in the coming years.

— word count: 2.8k

— author’s notes: aaaaa thank you so much for loving my works, that means so much to me !! i slightly altered the request and made it a picnic date with some coffee on the side. i had fun writing this bc it screamed single in my face. [sighs] i feel like i’m torturing myself by writing these scenarios sksklfjwe anyways happy reading !!

reblogs are greatly appreciated !! 

Feelings were something that Levi couldn’t get a grasp on since he could remember. He was a stoic and reserved man, even among his peers — that was until he met the woman who made him weak in the knees. The first time he met her, he had to regain his composure when she gave him a small smile. The two of them were in front of the counter in the nearby café, with him ordering his daily dose of tea while she told the barista her favored blend of coffee. Levi remembered shaking his head at the unnecessary love for coffee — tea will always remain superior in his opinion. He apparently murmured that out loud, with the most beautiful pair of eyes shifting to meet his caught his heart and took his breath away.

Who knew that being regulars of that café and by visiting the establishment at the same time could make their fates align as if they were woven together.

Today was one of the rare times he had free time from university and the best part is that today marks their first anniversary as a couple.

Levi had no idea what to do. Since he was an absolute goner in the feats of romance, he tried consulting his friends. It was something he mildly regretted. Erwin was the same as him, always focused on academics that he doesn’t have any time for relationships. The fucking giant suggested he should stay true as possible in his intentions, planning just a small date that can fit their little world together — not grandeur at all, to which Levi slightly took note of. Next, asking Hange was an absolute disaster. Knowing that you shared a major with this buffoon, they announced to the whole lab that Levi’s taking you on a date on your anniversary. It was a good thing they don’t know what he was planning.

So Levi decided on a small picnic date, with food and drinks from the café you two frequented.

Everything was packed safely and securely in a basket on the front seat of his car. To be honest, this was the first time he stood the longest in front of his closet. Planning what to wear was a total waste of time but he wasn’t complaining about his outfit for the day even though it was similar to the outfits he donned every day. He kept stretching his turtleneck in the anticipation of seeing you after your lab. While he waited in the parking lot closest to your department building, Levi was scrolling through his social media accounts.

It always warmed his heart every time he visited his feed on Instagram, every single post featuring you. Hange said it was simp behavior and Levi didn’t talk to them for an entire week. (Well, after having a reflection at one of your dates, staring at you like you were his salvation, he concluded that Hange was right.)

A message appeared on his screen, making his lips quirk up in the smallest yet endearing way possible.

i’m going out of the lab now, i’m so excited for our date

Levi looked up from his phone, seeing your bubbly smile lighting up the parking lot. Even though the windows are tinted, he reciprocated your wave. He unlocked the door of the passenger seat and suddenly, the fruity scent of your perfume enveloped him in a warm blanket of comfort. The next thing he knew, his shoulders relaxed in a droop, meeting your eyes as you lit up at the sight of the basket.

“Hi,” you greeted him, taking the basket and putting it on your lap as you made yourself comfortable on the front seat.

Levi turned to face you and leaned forward, hands pulling on the seatbelt and securing you beside him. He stopped with only a few inches separating your faces, his half-lidded silver gaze going back and forth between your lips and eyes. After a few seconds, uttered so softly against your lips, “Hi, beautiful.” The feeling of your lips moving against his always gave him a torpedo of butterflies, today’s occasion only spurring the insects to flutter their wings that it felt so electrifyingly good. With a little swipe of his tongue on your bottom lip, he hummed as he pulled away with red cheeks and a small smirk on his now shiny lips. “You put on blueberry.”

“Yeah,” you agreed with a small laugh, kissing him again quickly that he pouted.

“You know I can’t stop when you have that flavor of lip balm.”

You playfully narrowed your eyes. “I thought we have a date to go to.”

“Just one more?”

You grinned at how clingy Levi was becoming. It was rare for him to be like this and every time he acts like a touch-starved partner, it was too much for your weak heart. You held yourself back from pushing his cheeks together and marveling how adorable this side of him is. Leaning to fit your lips against his, you gave him what he wanted. “There. Now, let’s go on this date you’ve been planning.”

Levi chuckled as he straightened on his seat. He placed a hand on the back of your seat, looking behind him as he steered the car out of the parking lot and into the cityscape. The whole ride, his other hand was covering one of yours on top of the basket, his thumb rubbing soothingly across the back of your hand. You hummed along with the song playing on the radio, missing the adoring glances Levi gave you every once in a while. Fifteen minutes flew by so quickly and the car stopped in the small parking area of the local park. The two of you got out of the car, Levi pulling your hand in his, and leading you to a nice spot in the emerald plains.

With both ends held between you two, the picnic blanket was carefully draped on the grass, then making yourselves comfortable on the laid-out blanket. Levi took out everything nestling inside the basket — some wrapped sandwiches, a container of berries, shawarma wraps, and a small tin of oatmeal cookies. You were starving since you ate a salad from the university’s convenience store early in the morning for your lab meeting. As each container was revealed by Levi, you were anticipating the moment you will have your fill. Your stomach seemed to agree with your line of thought, interrupting the comfortable silence with a low gurgle. Levi looked up from tidying everything, eyebrow raised in slight amusement.

You felt your face become warm. “Oh, shut up. I haven’t eaten anything since nine in the morning. I’m bound to be hungry after not eating lunch.”

Levi clicked his tongue, pushing the sandwiches in front of you. “Who told you to skip lunch anyway?”

You leaned forward, fluttering your eyelashes with an innocent smile. “I have you to bring me my go-to order in the café anyway.” You bit down on a clubhouse sandwich. Everything became light when your palate was immediately satisfied. You couldn’t help but eat the sandwich as quickly as possible because being hungry enhances the taste of food.

“Hey, slow down,” Levi lightly scolded you. “You might choke.” The next second, you were coughing after gobbling the sandwich in a new record. Levi turned to the basket and took out a large cup of iced coffee, handing it to you to wash down whatever was lodged in your throat. “Here, drink it off.”

You would’ve cooed at the sight of your favorite blend of coffee if not for your life on the line with all your coughing. Slurping the cold liquid until you felt your cough subsiding, you let out a contented sigh as you slumped against Levi’s side. You smiled when you felt a pair of lips brushing on your head. You took a drink of your coffee before muttering, “What would I do without you?”

“Probably die of choking. I told you to slow down every time you’re hungry but it will always end with you having food down the wrong pipe.”

You laughed. “I still have you to remind me that.” You looked up at him, catching the adoring look Levi was giving you. You took it as a moment to admire him as well. His eyes will always remind you of the stars, their silvery glow so bright against any source of light. A lot has happened in the year you were together and you were starting to wish you could paint your love in the most vibrant hues. Leaning up, you pressed a kiss on the corner of Levi’s lips. “I’m so happy it’s you,” you murmured on his cheek, forehead pressed on his temple.

Levi stared at you with half-lidded eyes, hand lifting to brush a thumb on the apple of your cheek. Your name dripping from his lips made your heart flutter. His throat bobbed, his mouth opening and closing as if he wanted to say something. Just as you were about to ask him what was bothering him, Levi dipped his head until his lips stopped beside your ear. He always did this whenever he has to say something that was meant for your ears only. You patiently waited for him to muster his courage, rubbing the hand cradling your jaw. However, you breathed out a gasp when he finally said the words that you were never afraid to tell him.

“I love you. So fucking much.”

You could only stare at his embarrassed face, surprise taking away your voice. On normal days, you would’ve teased him for the blush creeping his face, reaching his ears that had you swooning. But now, the sight of his reddened cheeks and restless eyes made your face heat up. Your heartbeat was so loud in your ears, the effect of your lover’s confession spurring your senses in overdrive. You felt so many things at the moment, you felt proud of Levi for voicing out his feelings to you and you felt all the love dedicated to him gathering in your chest.

“I know it took me a whole year to say these words to you and I’m not that great with feelings unlike some people you know,” Levi rambled, silver irises flicking at anything but you. “B-But,” he cursed at his stutter, “I really do love you. I’m so fucking happy that it’s you, too. You are so patient with me and I’m starting to think that I don’t deserve you.” He said your name again in that fluttering way that made your heart clench. “Happy anniversary to us finding home in each other. I want this to last and I hope you won’t get tired of me.”

“I would never,” you reassured him, cupping his cheeks in your hands. “You took the words right out of my mouth, Levi. I love you, too. Everything in my life involving you is the best part of it.”

Levi planted his lips on yours, kissing you like it was the last time he could ever do so. “You’re making me weak and I don’t mind if you do it for the rest of my life.”

You suddenly perked up; eyes bright as you remembered the gift you tucked in your bag. “I got something for you.” You took out a small black box and handed it to a wide-eyed Levi. “I know it’s not much but it reminded me of you.”

A silver simple bracelet was placed on top of a small cushion, a thin plate connecting the two ends of the bracelet. Levi didn’t buy any gifts for you except for planning the date and it made him feel guilty. His eyebrows were furrowed as he stared at the piece of jewelry, his apology clear in his eyes. “I didn’t buy any gift for this day. Fuck.”

You chuckled, unclasping the bracelet and putting it on Levi’s wrist. Your fingers touched the bracelet gingerly, a wistful painted on your lips. “This date and you saying you love me for the first time couldn’t amount to what I just gave you.” You kissed him on the cheek. “You’re already the best gift I could ask for, a simple bracelet is nothing compared to you.”

Levi smiled breathtakingly before nuzzling his face in the crook of your neck, eliciting a series of giggles from you.

“Okay, now let’s dig in. I’m still hungry, you know.”

“You’re always hungry, love.”

“Thank you for the coffee, by the way.”

“Yeah, yeah. Now eat some more.”

-

You look so peaceful sleeping with your head on his lap.

It was nearing sunset by the time you were getting drowsy. The food was already finished half an hour ago but that didn’t stop you two from continuing the picnic date by exchanging stories. You were in the middle of telling Levi your encounter with your juniors when you yawned. Levi suggested you try to get some rest after a busy week in your major, taking his advice with a hum as you laid down on the blanket. The cups and containers were all tidied up in the basket beside him and Levi thought that it will be getting late the more time you spend in the park.

He decided against waking you up so he put on your backpack, tucked the basket on the crook of his elbow, and slid his arm on your back and under your knees. He carried you carefully until he reached his car, slowly placing you in the front seat, and buckling your seatbelt. He kissed your forehead before putting the basket and bag in the backseat. The drive to your shared apartment was spent with Levi glancing at your sleeping form and the bracelet that reflected against the sunset.

Entering the apartment building after parking the car in the basement lot, carrying everything, including you, proved to be quite difficult until he reached the door to your apartment. Levi had to stick to the wall to prevent you from falling to the floor as he pressed the passcode to your and Levi’s living space. Leaving his shoes in the rack by the entrance, Levi padded to your room.

As he placed you on the covers, he realized he was staring too much with your bag on his back and the basket still tucked in his elbow. After taking off your backpack, he hastily returned to the kitchen to leave the basket on the counter. The events of the day suddenly entered his mind and a smile instantly pulled on the corners of his mouth. You were the best thing that happened in his life. You encouraged him to pick himself up after finding himself stuck in limbo. Your smile was one of the prettiest things he ever saw on the planet, which says something because Levi never described anything as pretty in all his life. (Except for his mom but that’s already a given since he would get a scolding whenever he visits home.) Sure, he was bummed that he didn’t give you anything for your anniversary but today will be one of the days he will look forward to celebrating.

That’s all that matters.

Going back to your room, Levi changed into his pajamas and slipped into bed with you.

Levi froze for a moment when you shifted your position, humming as you opened your eyes drowsily. You smiled at him but that didn’t stop Levi from feeling guilty about waking you up. He knew how much you needed sleep. He was a witness to your sleepless nights and caffeinated rushes so taking away the one thing you find solace in was shitty.

“Are we home?” you murmured in a voice painted with sleep.

“Shit, baby, I’m sorry for waking you up,” Levi fussed. “Yeah, we’re home but I didn’t wake you up because you’re sleeping so well. I’m really sorry.”

You only laughed, leaning up to kiss your lover. Levi poured everything in the kiss, opening his eyes slowly to the feeling of your body snuggling in his side. “I love you, Levi.”

“I love you, too, sweetheart.”

He didn’t mean to wake you up so Levi laid on his back and pulled you closer until your head nuzzled his chest. His eyes never looked away from you, roaming and soaking in your peaceful features. You were easily the most beautiful person in Levi’s mind. How your eyelashes touched the top of your cheeks, how your eyebrows relaxed at the physical contact with him, how your lips quirked in a small smile at the feeling of him enveloping you. He could admire you all evening but his eyelids were already tugging downwards. Maybe it was the way your saccharine scent calmed his senses or maybe it could be the way you felt so right fitted to him like this.

It could be so many reasons but all Levi knew was that he had never felt so comfortable in his life, pulling him in a dreamless sleep filled solely with your warmth.

[yostresswritinggirl]

Stages of Grief

Detailed accounts of how the Genshin Boys deal with a break up... (masterlist)

Childe and Silent Acceptance

It depends on who initiated the breakup and if the reason behind it was actually valid in his eyes. He's not going to stop or be stubborn if it was the right way to go, he won't reach for your hand as you walk away, instead he'll stare at the ground until he can finally move himself.

Childe in all of his life after the Abyss struggled with his emotions more than any other normal human being. The essence of relationships was something he struggled to conform to until he met you, and then you left.

For a long time, his grip on his bow and arrow would tremble a lot to the point that he barely hits his target. Bows require precision yet everytime he grips, it just won't stop shivering. Hence his fights would mostly consist with his Hydro blades packed with the mightiest force he can bring in his frustration.

He will cry to the God of Love about it once in a state of absolute vulnerability, but the Tsaritsa would stay silent yet consoling. In the end of that quiet encounter Childe would have his resolve changed and his heart more hardened,

"The Fatui isn't made to love, but to conquer."

Zhongli's Desperate Bargaining

What does it mean to break up? To have space? To remove yourself from love? To be able to? These questions invade his mind every second after the break up, as Zhongli is but a man of logic, of black and white methodology. Is it really possible to leave from a contract of love? Is this a violation?

He will ask for reconciliation, for a talk to see what he has done wrong as well as a fortification of an actual contract between you two. It was horrible in your eyes, but it was something akin to him to do so. In the end there was no salvation in the wet ink that lays in front of him.

He will wander a lot with his thoughts, missing most of the time from work and observing humans in their natural habitat. He was still confused of the ordeal and will continue his ministrations of trying to understand what had gone wrong when he was sure he did things correctly to the dot.

He might try and sway you back but it's all a lost cause already. Zhongli might be intrusive, but if his advances make you uncomfortable, he will respectfully stand back and disappear once and for all.

You know for sure that he will think back to the times when he was still with Guizhong, with his fellow archons, with everyone. And he weeps at another loss, at another failure of himself,

"Guizhong, even now I still cannot understand them."

Anger in Albedo's Teal Eyes

Humans and their many facets concerning different types of relationships had always been a pure mystery to him. And with how he finally managed to grasp one that seemed everlasting was an accomplishment he boasts so nonchalantly. Where did it go wrong?

He questions you in every aspect that contains one, interviewing with a commanding tone as the coldness he brings to others now comes to you and it held with it a piercing glare, packed with a tightness to his crossed arms. He was filled with disappointment for many things, and that includes you and him. Once you are gone, he locks himself back to his work.

Where did he go wrong? His focus on his research for the meaning of life changes to that not written in paper but canvassed in his mind, his vials of chemicals no longer produce the results he wanted, and his frustration grows. At one point, Sucrose was witness to one of his only breakdowns. Which procured a lot of broken glass.

He was a disappointment, a disgrace, not just to himself but to his master he has no clue where. Abandoned to be the greatest, abandoned to his lowest. If Master Rhinedottir was there, would she still call him a genius?

Many nights would be restless to Albedo and most of the time he ventures far and beyond what Mondstadtians can see. He can't keep himself cooped up in a world that reminds him of you, and so he leaves, together with his frustration,

"The meaning of life won't come anytime soon."

Xiao's Mask of Depression

Without the aid of the distant flute to constantly grapple with the demons within him, he has found solace in the comfort of you. But it came to an end faster than he expected, it ended when he thought it would never. And you were gone before you knew exactly what you did. You left an after image of yourself in every part of his life and it became the hardest thing to work around.

The Almond Tofu in his mouth carry no more sweetness and the softness that reminded him of dreams turned into pitiful nightmares of a reality taken away from him. Goldett stopped serving after the third plate rotted in the balcony.

The Inn was no home to him anymore, Xiao had seen too much of your past visages, hallucinations to even begin to comprehend what is real or not. He disappears to wherever and only comes by when there's a major need to do so.

Verr sees it in him and on him. Xiao's battles became more drastic and obsessive, and a lot of times he ventures back dripping with blood that she knows isn't his, but some of those may not. He stands with a downtrodden gaze without a care for the mess that he is.

The voices in his head changed their assault from manifesting rage to hitting at his most vulnerable core: the loss of you. The very thing that kept him together and he did something wrong to make you leave, something even he himself does not know. And they were getting louder and louder—

"The Liyue Qixing can handle the new world, maybe now is the best time... to properly retire."

Make the fifth one!

My brain went into Denial cuz I lost the prompts in my head for a fifth lmao- New Xiao banner yay :)

(Zhongli preparing Xiao's funeral hehe-)

@kookieyachi @sk1nnyangelic @bunniesrorange @albaedhoe @struggljng @heisenwurst @moaa @dandelion-dreams @witchsungie @lehra @zelos-simp @legionqueensav @snackgod @rxsalinee @cala-ran @wind-wheel @lilydewi22 @yellowflowre

[mostlycompetentwriter]

Road Not Taken (one-shot)

Part of the Stray Wolves Series

F/M Pairing: Y/N x Bang Chan (SKZ)

Warnings: Smut, Explicit Language, Lots of dirty talk, breeding kink, mentions of knotting, heavy degradation...basically, this is pure filth (but only at the end)

Word Count: 5.5 K

Genre: Werewolf AU; Marriage AU

Summary: It’s true that Bang Chan, the legendary pack alpha of the Stray Wolves, had never felt the need to take a mate until he met Y/N, the much-younger she-wolf who stole his heart. As the pack alpha’s mate, there are certain expectations that she must meet in her position, but she’s still learning while also getting into trouble with her close friends Seungmin and Jeongin. 

Honestly speaking, the concept of mates and mating had never held any influence over me until the day I officially presented as an Omega. Suddenly, the idea of growing old with someone while taking care of our pups seemed like a scenario that I desperately needed in my life. Consequently, it consumed all of my dreams involving the future, but I still didn’t expect a proposal from my pack alpha whose dimpled smile made me feel incredibly special.

For starters, Chan was much older than me, and he was friends with my older brother, Jisung, who was caught off-guard by our sudden romance. You see, Chan became pack alpha after our last leader formally retired, and he had been serving in his place for many years. It was always customary for the pack alpha to find a mate, but Chan didn’t seem to favor the traditional approach. In fact, many of my pack members thought that he would never find a mate.

At least, until Chan approached me one morning after the two of us spent the day hunting together, which wasn’t anything out of the ordinary. Despite being Jisung’s friend, Chan and I were fairly close, and I liked spending time with him because he never saw me as a younger member who still needed time to mature. And maybe I was young and reckless, but Chan never treated me like I was something to coddle, even if his overprotective instincts occasionally intervened.

When I officially mated with Chan, the entire pack was shocked. It seemed somewhat scandalous considering our age-gap and the numerous women who Chan had passed on throughout his tenure as alpha. But Chan had never concerned himself with the opinions of others, and he simply brought me into his life like I had always belonged next to his side.

It was an enormous responsibility, and I was still learning how to properly navigate the complexities of my responsibilities as pack Luna, especially in consideration of my age. But I wanted to do my best for Chan since he was giving me everything that I wanted, and, for the most part, I stayed on my best behavior for him, even if it was sometimes hard to resist the occasional moment of mischief. Especially when my friends Seungmin and Jeongin were involved, and they were a big part of the reason why our little trio had been deemed the pack’s troublemakers.

Maybe that’s why Chan always hesitated whenever I brought them up in conversation, and I carefully studied my mate from the warmth of our bed as dressed himself in regular clothes. “What are your plans, love?” he asked while busying himself with the buttons on his shirt.

“I don’t know,” I answered mindlessly. “I’ll probably just spend the day with Seungmin and Jeongin.”

Chan grimaced at the mention of their names, adjusting the leather strap of his belt as he considered me with dark eyes. “Just be careful,” he said, approaching the bedside to lean down and inhale deeply against my neck. 

“I’m not a kid,” I grumbled against his touch, squirming around on the mattress.

“I know you’re not,” Chan said, smirking when he pulled back. “But it’s my job to worry about you.”

“You don’t have to worry all the time,” I protested, but Chan’s smile was still warm as he left our shared bedroom, and I waited until I could hear the sound of the front door closing before jumping out of bed.

When I was barely of age to leave my mother’s side, I met Seungmin and Jeongin by accident. Apparently, the younger two pups had formed a formiddable alliance, and they always did their best to push the limits of their mother’s patience. They were brothers by blood, but they were also best friends, and I never thought that I would find a place in their dynamic.

However, when we met for the very first time, I found out that Seungmin and Jeongin shared a lot of the same mischievous nature that often resulted in my mother apologizing to the older wolves who complained when I disrupted their frequent slumber. Because of our natural inclinations for mischief, I found myself joining the brothers as we wrecked havoc and mayhem on our other pack members who were certainly not impressed by our hijinks.

I’m sure my past behavior contributed to my pack’s hesitance when Chan accepted me as his mate. After all, they would be expected to show the pack Luna respect, but that was hardly feasible considering who I liked to keep in close company. Initially, Chan had tried to discourage our meetings by forcing Jeongin and Seungmin to join as many hunting and border patrols as he could manage. But we still found ways to see one another, and I think Chan gradually decided that he couldn’t stop the inevitable, even if his most recent warning to the brothers had forced them to reconsider some of our more impressive pranks...

“Are you sure about this?”

There was a slight note of trepidation in Seungmin’s tone, and it matched the look of insecurity on his face as we stood outside of the abandoned house in the woods. It was fabled among our pack’s younger members to be haunted, and some of the elder had warned us that it was strictly off-limits which, of course, stoked my curiosity. So, I scoffed at his hesitation because both Seungmin and Jeongin had been excited to talk about visiting the house last night. Yet, confronted with the real thing, they were both suddenly the world’s biggest cowards.

“Come on, guys, we all want to know what’s inside,” I said, reaching back for Seungmin’s hand. 

“Yeah, but if it’s something bad...” Jeongin trailed off, and his eyes widened with a sudden realization. “What if Chan finds out?”

“He’ll never know,” I assured him. “Let’s just go inside and look around.”

I started forward without an ounce of hesitation, walking up the front steps of the house’s porch with confidence. I could also hear Seungmin and Jeongin following me from behind, and I took that as a good sign that my friends has refused to feel intimidated by my alpha’s attempts to ruin our fun. After all, what’s the worst that could happen in an abandoned house?

With this in mind, I reached out to open the front door, and it was unsurprising when I found it unlocked, allowing it to fall back against the hinges. The inside of the house was musty and old, and there was a foul smell in the air like the house was hiding something that was slowly rotting away. Whatever it was, I nearly gagged around the smell as it assaulted by sensitive nose, looking back over at Seungmin and Jeongin who both wore matching expressions of disgust.

“Where is that coming from?” Seungmin asked, and I allowed him to take the lead as we walked into the first room.

It appeared to be some form of kitchen, and I could identify dozens of places that might generate such a foul-smelling stench. “This place is disgusting,” Jeongin said. 

“What did you expect?” I snorted. 

“It’s really cold too,” Jeongin remarked, and I startled when I realized that he was right, and that was a bit strange considering the weather outside.

Nevertheless, I continued my exploration of the house, leaving the kitchen and approaching some of the rooms at the back of the house. I heard Jeongin and Seungmin laughing at something in the kitchen, but I paid them no mind as I opened the door to the first room.

It wasn’t anything special, but there was a bed in the middle of the floor and a closet near the heavily boarded-up window. I exhaled slowly, walking across the creaking floorboards as I noticed something strangely familiar tickling my senses. My wolf was suddenly on high-alert, and I was trying to look for anything that might be triggering the hair-raising response to whatever I was smelling that was right on the edge of my consciousness...

“Y/N!”

I nearly jumped out of my skin, spinning around on my heel at the sound of Jeongin’s high-pitched shrill. “Hey!” I shouted, leaving the bedroom door wide open as I retraced my steps to the kitchen. “What’s going on?”

“Y/N.” Seungmin’s voice was hushed, and the two boys were standing shoulder-to-shoulder in a defensive posture. I stood on my toes to look over them, and I felt my breath hitch at the back of my throat because standing at the entrance to the kitchen was a man. But I knew immediately that he wasn’t just an ordinary human who happened upon the house...

“Vampire,” I whispered, but not like our neighbors who lived in the mountains. These were rogue vampires who had been cast aside, and they were left without the necessary vampire bonds and fresh sources of blood required to sustain them. It certainly explained the metallic smell that had been all over that bedroom, and it provided justification for the lack of sunlight penetrating the inside. 

This vampire was in the late stages of decay, and his blood-red eyes revealed that he was in no mood for our playful adventure. In fact, I could detect the hunger in his gaze, and I reached for Seungmin’s arm because I knew that we were in trouble.

“We need to get outside,” Jeongin said, and I nodded in response. 

Because this vampire would not last in the sun, and it was our only possible form of salvation since there was no fighting a desperate vampire. 

“Start walking the other way,” Seungmin said, and the three of us started to back up carefully, keeping the vampire in our line of sight as we tried for another means of escape.

However, I had taken no more than a couple of steps backwards when I felt another cold blast hit me from behind. I immediately stopped, and it caught Seungmin’s attention. He turned around to confront me, but his eyes widened and I knew that he had found the source of that chilly presence.

There was more than one vampire in this house. 

“We’ll have to fight,” I said, and Jeongin whimpered at the idea.

“Stay close,” Seungmin said, and we formed a protective circle as the Vampires started to approach, fangs bared and with sinister snarls interrupting the quiet of the kitchen.

I held my breath, waiting for the right opportunity to shift, when I heard Seungmin let out a warning growl, and I realized too late that the first vampire had launched himself at my friends. Our circle was broken, and I nearly lost my balance at the force thrown against me from behind. Yet, it also created the perfect opportunity for the second Vampire who quickly took advantage of the distraction. 

I fell to the ground hard, groaning at the pain jolting through my shoulder from the impact. But I was given no time to consider my injuries as my adrenaline kicked in and affected all of my concentration. It was enough to take my mind away from the fall, but not enough to muster an offensive strike. I was left playing defense with a rabid Vampire who knew that I was much weaker on my own. 

I whimpered as the Vampire stood over me, teeth glinting menacingly as he hissed in my direction. I closed my eyes at the harsh sound, ready to accept my fate at the hands of the cruel Vampire, when a familiar howl broke through the haze of fear and confusion. And I realized with a barely-restrained gasp that an enormous jet-black wolf had suddenly attacked the Vampire, saving my life. I took a moment to catch my breath before using the counter to help myself stand up again, looking around the room at my pack members fighting the Vampires who had almost successful in their campaign.

I winced when I realized that the familiar jet-black wolf was my mate, and he was savage in his assault. Yet, at the same time, I realized that Chan was not inflicting much damage to the Vampire - almost like he didn’t want to harm it. I was puzzled by the consideration, but a quick tug on my arm alerted me to Changbin, our pack Beta, who was yelling at me to join the others outside.

I immediately obeyed his order, trying to avoid the Vampires and Werewolves engaged in heavy conflict, noticing that more Vampires had somehow joined the attack. But the escalating situation was left behind for the much-needed sunlight, and I breathed a sigh of relief when I found Seungmin and Jeongin unharmed. “I’m so glad you’re okay,” I said, allowing them to wrap their arms around me in familiar embrace.

“Y/N,” Seungmin said, looking at me with concerned eyes. “The house is protected by King Felix. It’s meant to provide a place for rogue Vampires to die in peace.”

I swallowed hard at the mention of the Vampire King who Chan had tried so hard to maintain good relations. “What have we done?” I asked, turning around at the sound of an all-too familiar voice.

Of course it was Chan, walking with our pack members as they diligently followed their alpha. He was talking to an older Vampire, one who I had never noticed before, and she was positively enraged as she practically screamed in my mate’s face. Apparently, the situation had evolved into something that held far more consequences, and I had never felt so ashamed.

When Chan came closer, I shivered at the rage in his eyes, and I refused to meet his gaze when he pulled me behind him. “We’ll talk later,” he growled, reminding me of the intimidating alpha who was feared throughout the neighboring packs.

“King Felix marked these lands as neutral,” the older Vampire said. “And you agreed.”

Chan stepped forward, keeping his hands behind his back as he addressed the elderly woman who sneered at my pack mates. “I’m sorry for their intrusion,” Chan said, bowing low at the waist. “It won’t happen again.”

“I hope not,” the old woman said. “You should train your pups to behave.”

I could feel myself blushing at being categorized as a pup when, as the pack alpha’s mate, I was expected to be one of the most mature members. It had a chastening effect, and I cowered behind Chan with my wolf’s tail metaphorically caught between my legs. Surely, everyone else in the pack would find out about our misadventure, and if they thought the same thing as this older vampire...

I shivered, resisting the urge to whine and lean into Chan’s familiar weight.

“They’ll be disciplined,” Chan reassured the vampire, glancing at me from the corner of his eye with a look that screamed punishment. 

“I’ll let this go since it’s your first infraction and my vampires weren’t harmed,” she said. “But if I catch any of your wolves out here again...”

She closed her eyes as if she wanted to control her latent rage. But Chan understood the inherent warning. “The agreement was made for everyone’s protection,” Chan said. “This is the last time you will see wolves here.”

The older vampire snorted before retreating inside the house, and I tried not to whine when Chan took a firm hold of my arm, pulling me along next to him as we returned to camp for the evening.

The pack alpha’s cabin was located strategically at the back of our defined camp where Chan and I could find privacy together. I usually savored the distance from my pack mates, but I was feeling increasingly wary following my embarrassing blunder with the rogue vampires. The idea of spending unsolicited time alone with Chan was suddenly an intimidating prospect. 

Still, it wasn’t in my nature to avoid my mistakes, and I followed Chan inside our shared cabin. He paused at the entrance to remove his shoes before heading in the direction of our bedroom, and I quickly followed his lead. Even as my wolf cautioned us to approach carefully, I didn’t want to exhibit that kind of behavior around Chan because it would only contribute to my immature image.

“Hey,” Chan finally addressed me, standing in front of our dresser. “Sit down.”

I held my tongue, eliminating the few steps to the edge of our bed where I deposited myself on top of the mattress. My weight sunk down into the foamy material, and I supported myself back on my arms, waiting for Chan to speak again. In the meantime, I fought the desire to try and explain myself since I knew that speaking out of term would only infuriate my older mate.

“What did your mother teach you about Vampires?” Chan asked. “Or, did you not pay attention?”

I flinched at his cruel tone. “She told me they were our enemies and that I should avoid them.”

“Did she?” Chan questioned. “Because your actions suggest that you ignored that lesson.”

“I’m sorry, Chan,” I said, deciding that, instead of justifying my bad behavior, I should try and appeal to him instead.

“I don’t really think you are,” Chan scoffed, looking at me from over his shoulder. “In fact, I’m wondering if you were even serious when you agreed to be my mate.”

I shuddered at his claim. “How can you say that? I love you, Chan.”

“You can love me and still be unprepared for the responsibilities of pack Luna,” Chan said. “Otherwise, you would think twice before putting yourself in situations where you could send a bad example to the rest of our pack.”

“I’m ready,” I insisted. “I want to be a good mate for you.”

“Then you better start proving that those aren’t just empty promises,” Chan growled, and I was thoroughly unprepared for his sharp tone. “What if you had gotten hurt? Those rogues weren’t able to control themselves, and you put yourself and your friends in danger.”

“I didn’t want anyone to get hurt,” I said. “It was a mistake.”

“I’m so glad you realize that,” Chan said with heavy sarcasm. “Why didn’t that cross your mind before taunting a group of vampires?” 

“We didn’t know that there were vampires in the house!”

“Have you lost the ability to smell?” Chan snapped. “Why didn’t you take precautions?”

“I-I guess we weren’t thinking about that,” I said, stumbling over my answers to his difficult questions.

Chan sighed, turning around to look at me before his eyes grew darker, and I found myself on the receiving end of an approaching alpha with malicious intent. Instinctively, I crawled backwards on the bed, colliding against the headboard while Chan closed the distance between us, looming over top of me with one hand wrapping itself around my throat. It wasn’t enough to cause harm, but to send a message:  “One second,” Chan said. “That’s all they need to snap this pretty neck.”

I swallowed hard, and I could feel my throat constricting from his powerful grip. “Channie,” I whispered. “You don’t know how sorry I am.”

He closed his eyes, leaning in closer to inhale sharply against my scent gland. “What if I had lost you?” 

The words sent shivers down my spine because I could feel the heavy and warm humidity of his breath coating my skin. I stiffened from my position underneath him, suddenly realizing that Chan’s concerns went beyond potential conflict with the vampires. Those rogues would likely never attack an entire pack of wolves unprovoked, but the delicate balance of life and death hung on a narrow precipice when it involved younger wolves playing foolish games. “I’m still here,” I assured him, releasing calming pheromones to alleviate the ripe smell of fear masking his usual scent.

“You can’t do these things anymore,” Chan said, lifting his head to look at me. “Do you understand?”

I nodded in response, keeping steady contact with his stormy gaze. “I’ll be better for you, Chan.”

He sighed, and there was a sudden change taking hold of his demeanor, hardening the corners of his eyes and the harsh upturn to his upper lip. The transformation was subtle, but his scent was becoming thicker, a reminder of something dominant lurking beneath Chan’s soft, curly hair and dimpled smile. I knew better than to push him in this state, so I simply bared my throat, relaxing my arms across the bed.

“Such a good bitch when she wants to be,” Chan growled, and I swallowed hard, eyelids fluttering closed when his nose pressed into my swollen scent gland. His teeth nipped the delicate flesh, and I could feel his tongue tracing the ridges of his faded mark. Chan released another warning snarl, telling me to keep still for him while he examined my body with wide, studious eyes. Under any other circumstances, I would’ve considered it intimate, but there was something that Chan wanted to prove, and he was waiting for the right opportunity.

I watched as he explored my smaller figure, hands gliding along my waist while his nose inhaled along his journey south, exciting my senses and the wolf inside of me who was impressed by her mate’s display of alpha dominance. However, I couldn’t help but think that it was embarrassing to feel his nose press into the private junction between my thighs, and I squeezed my legs around his head when his tongue attempted to lap at me through the fabric of my pants. Chan growled, lifting his head to send me a warning look, pushing open my legs to continue his exploration of the place where my scent was most prominent. 

I had no idea what Chan’s motivations were, and this unfamiliar territory was making my inner wolf increasingly desperate. However, I knew better than to question him, and perhaps it was nothing more than a display of strength meant to send me a warning against disobeying him. Whatever it was, I certainly liked the attention, even if it was difficult to fight the temptation to run my hands through his hair.

Eventually, Chan sat back on his heels, watching me through narrowed eyes. “Take off your clothes,” he said.

I squirmed on top of the mattress in pure delight, eager to please Chan since I knew that our argument was, more or less, finished, and he was clearly waiting to re-stake his claim. “Okay,” I replied, complying with his order as I unbuttoned my shirt and jeans, removing them with careful movements. Then, I let the bundle of clothes fall into the floor before I adjusted my position again, keeping my arms splayed out across the sheets.

Meanwhile, his eyes swept across my naked form before Chan’s evaluation continued, but this time he was undeterred by the barrier of my clothing, and everything felt heightened without them in place to stop him from attacking smooth flesh with his teeth. Nipping at the sensitive skin and leaving marks that would remain visible for days. 

His hands also made themselves comfortable on my hips, holding me in place while his mouth did most of the work, tasting my scent gland until I was light-headed from his efforts. When he pulled away to catch his breath, I recognized the oily residue from my scent gland painting his lips. It was an erotic sight, and my wolf howled in delight when she could smell our intermingling scents permeating the air around us.  

And I couldn’t tear my eyes away from Chan’s mouth until he reached down for the hem of his shirt, tossing it aside to reveal his sculpted torso - nothing but defined planes of hardened muscles. It was a beautiful distraction, and I didn’t even notice when his jeans disappeared next, leaving him in nothing but the boxer shorts that did very little to hide the evidence of his arousal. My mouth immediately started to water, and I could feel myself practically salivating at the prospect of his thick cock hiding beneath a layer of fabric.

“You have a beautiful body,” Chan said, and I beamed at his compliment. My smile didn’t last, however, when he ghosted his tongue over one of my nipples, staring up at me from a curtain of long lashes. I watched his hands as they reached out to squeeze my breasts, testing their weight with a heavy groan. “They’ll be even bigger full of milk for our pups.” 

I inhaled sharply at the mention of pups because every instinct desired nothing more than to breed with my mate. It was a result of centuries of survival genes embedded within our DNA, and our inner wolves wanted to pass them onto our children for the next generation. For most werewolf couples, they always wanted the same thing, and Chan had only spoken to me briefly about having pups in the future. But Chan was responding to his alpha’s natural inclination to breed his mate, and he growled at the back of his throat, tugging on my nipple with his fingers while his tongue prodded at the hardened peak. 

“It hurts,” I whined, even though I was aroused by his practiced tongue attempting to soothe the harsh sting of his sharpened canines.

Chan glanced up at me before pulling away to survey his work, nodding in satisfaction before moving down my body once again. I could never predict his next movement, and I gasped when he started to nose against my pubic bone, warm breath tickling the sensitive skin. This time, he could inhale my scent straight from the source, and it didn’t take long for his tongue to lick a long stripe against my slit. 

Immediately, I arched my back in response to the pleasurable sensation, closing my eyes as his hands tightened their grip on my hips and forced his tongue inside my pussy, eating me out like he couldn’t get enough of my taste. I whined at his aggression, and more of my juices collected down the inside of my thighs. Chan purred when he realized, and he slurped loudly around my clitoris, bringing the engorged bud between his teeth. 

I wrapped my fingers through his hair, making a mess of whatever style he had attempted. But it only made Chan look even more appealing, and he rumbled deep in his chest as he chased after my taste, lapping at my juices as if trying to consume every last drop. “Y/N,” Chan said, and his voice was husky and guttural.

“It feels so good,” I said, and Chan hummed around me, supporting himself higher on his arms so that I could moan at the sight of the wetness surrounding his mouth. 

“Get on your hands and knees for me,” Chan requested. 

I nodded, turning onto my side and trying my best to support my upper body on thin arms and trembling legs. I wasn’t surprised by Chan’s request because the position was the ultimate sign of submission, and it was most often used during heats and ruts since it was best for breeding. The thought had me shivering, dropping my head against the pillows as I felt one of Chan’s hands run down the smooth expanse of my back.

I jerked forward when he landed a quick slap to my ass, and I let him mount me, legs caging my thighs between his stronger ones, moaning when the fat head of his cock brushed against my ass. His actions were incredibly rough, and I could smell his thick alpha scent as it clouded the air with a cloying mixture of fresh pine and something much darker. But I was also surprised by my body’s compliance, allowing Chan to press against my lower back and force me into an arch. 

“Are you ready?” he asked, and I hummed in acknowledgment, groaning when he slid in without resistance, and my pussy swallowed his cock greedily, desperate to milk him of everything that he had to offer me. “What a tight pussy,” he commented, forcing himself inside the rest of the way with a slight hint of desperation. 

I moaned when I realized that he was completely buried inside my wet heat, and I could practically feel the tip of his cock against the head of my cervix. There was nothing comparable to the feeling of fullness weighing heavily on my lower body, and I curled my fingers into the sheets to stop myself from rutting back against his cock. “Chan,” I said, shaking my head as tears started to form.

“Be patient, Y/N,” Chan said, and he pulled his hips back so that just the tip of his cock remained before slamming back inside with an unprecedented amount of force. I was completely unprepared because my legs weren’t strong enough to hold me up against his vicious thrust, and I fell forward against the bed - turning my head to the side to breath as Chan continued his rapid thrusts inside of my pussy. 

“Is this what you want?” Chan growled, nipping at the back of my neck. “Do you want me to stuff you full of pups?” I whined at his words, even if I knew that it was impossible outside of my regular heats. “You’d look so good after I bred you,” Chan said, pumping his hips faster as if he was trying to make that idea a reality. “Like a good little bitch.”

I cried at his filthy language, burying my face further into the mattress as I let Chan do whatever he wanted to me, moving me along his cock like I was just a warm hole for him to use whenever the moment was convenient. “Oh god,” I whispered as he switched angles, hitting my g-spot perfectly on every upward thrust.

“Maybe if you’re swollen with my pups, you won’t get into any more trouble,” Chan snarled, and I whimpered when his hand smoothed across my lower body as if imagining the swell of my bloated stomach.

“Please,” I said, reaching down for his hand to move it closer to my clitoris, encouraging Chan to touch me while he continued to pound into me over and over again, pushing his cock deep inside to the point where I could imagine feeling him at the back of my throat.

It was an abrupt descent from there, and he continued to stimulate my g-spot and clitoris perfectly because he knew my body so well after all this time together. Still, my orgasm hit me like a freight train, and I nearly screamed at the intensity, noticing stars along the edges of my vision. There was no strength left in my body, and I collapsed into a pile of heavy limbs while Chan continued to chase his own orgasm, growling when his knot started to swell in place. I whimpered, closing my eyes because it was starting to overstimulate my exhausted body, but Chan held me in place and sighed as he filled me with his cum.

For a moment thereafter, I was convinced that I would pass out, but I was able to control my breathing and steady my accelerating heart rate, feeling Chan fall onto the bed next to me. “Hold still,” Chan rumbled, adjusting my leg over his hip as he pulled me tighter against his chest, fingers petting over the place where his knot was securely stuffed inside my sore cunt. 

“Channie,” I whined, and it was a pathetic sound resulting from the steady feeling of his cum pulsing from his engorged length and the harsh way that he handled me, like he could fix me into any position that he desired.

“Are you gonna cause me any more trouble?” Chan growled directly into my ear, and my inner wolf howled at our predicament. There was no better way for Chan to assert his dominance - locking me onto his knot in submission, and lowering the regular pitch of his voice.

“No,” I managed, stuttering around a broken moan when Chan started to grind his hips, stimulating my throbbing clitoris to the point where it actually began to feel painful.

“Maybe I should just knot you all the time like this,” Chan said. “Then you can’t wander off without telling me.”

I gasped at the suggestion, turning my head to the side to expose my neck to him. It was a vulnerable position, but it pleased Chan who started heavily scenting the mark he had left on me - a permanent reminder that I belonged to him.

It was also a visible reminder of my place in the pack, and I was determined to stand proudly next to Chan’s side.

[milliedazzledust]

War Rages On: part 1 (Bucky Barnes imagine)

Words: 1161

A/N: Short snippet on a story I’m working on. There will be 2 or 3 parts - hope you enjoy (and don’t forget to tell me if you want to be tag on the next parts!)

The pain was throbbing in her guts. Excruciating, endless, a deep torture traveling her body, toying with what remained of her sanity, breaking her. Each breathe made it harder to stay conscious. The sore muscles in her arms, tightly chained together above her head, was the only sensation bringing her back to reality every time her mind joyfully wandered in the tempting land of death. She could not rest or resist. Falling asleep wasn’t an option, not when she seemed to be shred into pieces, not when the pain kept coming waves after waves, hitting her with such violence she had to fight herself not to give them the satisfaction of her tears. The red viscous liquid ran freely in thick scarlet rivers, making it almost impossible to keep her eyes open. She looked awfully pale, almost weightless. Mud was enmeshed with bloodied flesh and her skin had already started to turn into a sickening shade of purple. The only movement she could still make were the involuntarily quivering of her body, witness of her struggle to stay alive.

“Tell me where he is!” A voice authoritatively shouted, making her cringe.

She could barely raise her head to look at the man. She was drifting apart and her throat gurgled as she vainly struggled to breathe, spitting blood. She could not remember how much time had passed since she last saw the sunlight. For days they kept her chained, asking the same questions, over and over again. She hadn’t ushered a single word, letting herself get consumed by a pain that seemed to know no end and no limit. Her aggressor kept visiting her everyday, inventing new ways of tortures, enjoying the spectacle with cold-blooded eyes. There was never an ounce of guilt in his gaze, just the twisted pleasure radiating off his skin, making her sick. She could not comprehend how her body had hold up that long when all she waited for was the merciful embrace of death. Each droplets of blood dragged her near an end and all she could do was hanging on for him. Her head was spinning, on the verge of snapping. Her vision was clouding and she could feel herself fading away from that god awful place. She needed peace, just for a moment, just for a second. She needed to breathe, to let the tears fall, to wish Bucky was here. She could see him every time she closed her eyes. The memory of his voice made the pain almost bearable. Sometimes, even, when she became too weak, she could swore she could see him, standing near her, shouting to fight back. The sweet torture of those illusions were her salvation. His ghost never left her once and her desire for him to be more than a pigment of her imagination trapped her into the strange world of insanity.

“Talk!” The man forcefully howled, his voice reverberating in the small room where they kept the broken woman.

“Never …” She whispered.

“I’ll find your weakness, Agent Y/L/N, one way or another” He smiled. “They always break in the end”

“I’ll die before I say anything” She promised him, looking back at him to affirm her point. The simple movement of her head was almost too much.

“We’ll see about that.”

He nodded at one of the guards, silently ordering them to open the cell. She didn’t like the rictus on his face, it was as if he knew something she didn’t, as if he was planning his next move. He had made only a couple of steps when he stopped, turning back to look at the wounded Avenger.

“We are gonna have so much fun ripping you into pieces, Agent” He calmly told her. “I promise to make it painful”

“Do you really think I’m scared of you ?” She laughed, spitting when blood purred out her mouth.

“You should be scared. Hydra is days away from finding the Winter Soldier and he …. oh he will take so much pleasure when he’ll murder you, his own love” He pushed, hoping to break a nerve.

As soon as he said it, he turned back and started walking away from the woman.

“Screw you! You will never have him!” She shouted. “You hear me ?! You will never have Bucky!”

After what seemed to be days, one single tear rolled down her cheek. She firmly closed her eyes, hoping her lover was still hidden away in Wakanda, oblivious to what was happening. She was far away from imagining Tony and the Captain talking to each other again in order to find her. Steve was anxiously waiting for his phone to ring. Looking at one of the large window, inside the fortress of Wakanda, he prayed for all this to be a misunderstood, a miscommunication. Too focused on his mission of hiding his fellow Avengers from the government, he had neglected Y/N, sure she was more than safe with the King.

He was pacing back and forth when he felt the vibration of the device in his hand. He did not wait a moment before bringing it to his ear.

“Stark” He simply greeted.

“I shouldn’t be talking to you, Rogers.” The billionaire answered, almost unfriendly.

“Is she with you ?”

He heard Stark huffed.

“Am I supposed to know what you’re talking about ?” He asked in annoyance.

“Y/N. Is she with you ?” Steve insisted.

“Ok, what is this about ? And why would she be with me ? If I remember correctly, she chose to side with you, Captain” Tony sarcastically replied.

The super soldier closed his eyes, trying to remain calm. If she wasn’t with Tony, then she was in trouble.

“Tony, listen to me” Steve started.

Maybe it was his tone, or something his in voice that made Stark instantly shut up.

“She was supposed to stay hidden with Bucky but she received a message from you, saying you needed help, that … that it was urgent.”

“I didn’t sent anything” The billionaire affirmed.

“I know that now, but if this wasn’t you then …”

“Then it was a trap”

For a split second, none of them dared to voice what they feared the most.

“Does he know ?” Stark asked.

“What ?”

“Does Barnes know ?!” He punctuated his words.

Steve sighed.

“Not yet. I was hoping I’d have more infos before breaking the news”

“How long has it been ?”

“A few days ago apparently »

“And you’re sure nobody’s heard of her since then ?”

“I’m positive Tony. No text, no call, she’s MIA” He insisted.

The Captain could hear the keyboard of a computer over the phone and guessed Tony had already gotten to work.

“I’m bringing you and Barnes back” He told his friend. “I’ll send a jet”

“Tony, if the government …”

“I don’t care about them” The billionaire cut him. “She’s family, Steve”

The super soldier tightened his hold of the phone, his head dropping at the idea of his friend hurt somewhere.

“Alright. We’ll be there”

[adeadlysymphony]

A Last Encounter . . .

A/N: A dragon age prompt featuring our favorite egg and my inquisitor. I did a prompt challenge with a friend of mine and my sister. We decided to do it so we could give feedback on each others stories to improve our writing. I figured I would post it here and see what other people think. I hope you enjoy! 8D

Prompt: “Ask me to stay”

A bubble of laughter escaped her lips as she watched the children of skyhold play around in the snow. They insisted she stay and watch a reenacting of one of the many battles she and her companions had fought. Seeing them be so care free without a worry in the world set her at ease. A sense of peace washed over her in the early morning sun and at least, for a time, she could enjoy it. 

Skyhold. 

A place that had become her home, and not just to herself, but to many other ferelden’s as well. It had been a harrowing last few years, but they always endured. However, she has come to learn that things never stay calm for long, especially with a threat looming over Thadas still.  

A frown slowly replaced her once serine expression, brows furrowed in confusion. The cause of her perplexity was a flicker of a mythical green light out of the corner of her eye. Strange. A trick of the light perhaps? Had her mind gotten so used to the anchor that now she was starting to see things? 

Shaking her head at such silly thoughts she refocused her attention back on the children. . . but the only thing that greeted her was a field of snow. The laughter that once filled the courtyard-- gone.  

The once lively Skyhold stood barren as if no living soul had occupied it just moments ago. Panic started to set in, her mind trying to come up with a solution as to what happened. Before she could come to any conclusions a voice wrapped itself around her lungs, it became hard to breathe, a single breath of disbelief escaped her parted lips.

“Vhenan”

As if a fog had been lifted, she understood clearly now. 

The Fade.

A strange fascinating place, and yet frightening all rolled into one. A wise soul taught her the wonders of such a place, how there was nothing to fear unless you allowed it, and he was standing right in front of her.

Her first. Her Vhenan. 

A man who showed her the world and in turn she gifted him her fragile bleeding heart. She remembers that night vividly, how her mind so badly wanted her to forget, but her heart just wouldn’t let her. How he held her softly in his arms, how she latched on to every ounce of truth he spoke, the way he called her beautiful. 

The words sounded so sweet when they parted from his lips. They made her feel safe in the dangerous ever changing world around them. Some days she wonders if they were ever true at all. . . But they had to be, didn’t they? He wouldn’t be here if they weren’t. It felt as if an eternity had passed before she regarded even a modicum of composure. 

“Solas? What am I doing here?”

She had been afraid to speak at first, as if he would disappear the moment she did. Momentary relief washed over when he didn’t move an inch. Instead his blue eyes bore into her own, searching for something. His alabaster lips shaping around words that seem to be trapped on the tip of his tongue. 

“. . .I don’t know.”

“You don’t know?”

A range of emotions flashed in his tired eyes, what they were she wasn’t quite sure, hesitation, fear, regret?

“My own selfish reasons I suppose.”

He should have never come here, should have never allowed himself to be this close to her again. Every time he looked into those Emerald green eyes he swore he could feel his resolve slowly chipping away. She was his salvation and yet his damnation all at once. This wasn’t fair to her, he already tormented her dreams and now this? 

“Var lath vir suledin”

She had begged him once, not wanting to see him endure the path he walks now. In this sheer moment of bliss he wondered what he hoped to accomplish by bringing her here. A last chance, maybe? To convince her not to interfere with what must happen, or maybe it was to convince himself? His arms itched to hold her, even if this would truly be the last time. 

His Silent wish was granted as she slowly moved forward, each gentle step a thought out calculation until she stood directly in front of him. Her eyes searched his this time, still full of love and longing.

“Why won't you let me help you?” She softly asked, who knew one single question could convey so many emotions. A question that had already been answered before, maybe she was hoping for a different answer this time around.

“You know why.”

The gentle shake of her head made the white coils of her hair fall about her face. “And I will keep reminding you that there is always another way. You know you don’t have to be alone in this. We could find another path if you would just let me back in.”

“There is no other way, my love. As I said before, after all you’ve accomplished I will not have you walk this path of destruction.” Before he realized it, she was standing in his arms both his hands cupping her face of soft earthy colored skin. 

“Is there really nothing I can say?” The sorrow in her voice prominent.

He wanted to believe - No, he had to believe there was nothing she could say or do to back him away from the ledge he was tethering on. Without saying another word, he gently brushed the coils from her face, fingers tips memorizing every inch beneath them. 

Before his conscience could deter him from his actions, a wave of pure euphoria washed over him as he captured her soft full lips with his own. This was beyond rational thinking, it was what his soul craved and longed for. His vehnan, his love, and how he wished she could be his everything; but that would be selfish. He needed to fix the mess he created, even if that meant breaking both their hearts and opting to watch the world burn for the sake of something bigger than them.  

With his forehead resting on hers, eyes closed,  a pained expression eminent on his face. 

“Ask me to stay” 

It came as a whisper, softly spoken words that would be easy to miss had they not been standing so close. A single word carried on the wind, a word full of hope and desperation. 

“Stay”

[thatlovinfeelin]

Flightless Bird | eighteen | Bradley Rooster Bradshaw

Synopsis: Josephine Wilson Miller is alone for the first time in her life. She got married after her first year of college and became a housewife, but that life is gone now. So she runs to San Diego, to her childhood best friend Jake, where she meets the man who could very well be her salvation.

series warnings: unplanned pregnancy, just pregnancy in general, talks of infertility. past mental and emotional abuse. anxiety. talks of women's reproductive systems (idk)

“Mommy! Hurry up!” Wren said, dragging Jose behind her, “Auntie Nat twell her!” 

Natasha only laughed and walked next to Jose. They were on their way from the parking lot to the tarmac for the airshow. Jake was set to be flying and Wren was begging to go see it. Although, Jose tried to normally stay away from Airshows in general just in case someone certain was there. 

“So, I have some news,” Nat whispered to Jose. 

“Oh?”

Natasha just smiled and twisted her wedding ring, something Jose noticed the female pilot did when she was a little anxious. Her and Jake got married two years prior in a small ceremony on the beach. Not to big and fussy, as both of them wanted simple friends and family. A certain Blue Angels pilot was not able to attend, so Coyote was Jake’s best man while Jose was the maid of honor, with little baby Wren as a little flower girl. It was beautiful and simple and perfect. 

“You can’t tell anyone yet,” Phoenix stated, “But I’m pregnant.”

Jose stopped in her tracks, much to Wren’s dismay who let out a little wail and tried with all of her might to pull her mom forward. 

“Oh my god, Nat!”

“Are you mad? I know you-”

“Mad? Oh my god no, I’m so happy for you!” Jose exclaimed, hugging the other woman, “Does Jake know yet?”

Natasha shook her head, “No I haven’t found the time to tell him yet.”

“How far along?”

“Six weeks? I think? I have a doctors appointment next week to confirm,” She explained, “But I’m so scared to tell Jake. We’ve talked about kids, but not yet.”

“Well, I’m assuming you weren’t using anything?” Jose asked carefully. 

“We weren’t trying,” Nat swore, “But we weren’t not trying.”

Jose couldn’t help but laugh. That sounded like the most Jake and Natasha thing. 

“I want Gampa Mav and Nenny,” Wren whined, snapping the two women out of their hug. 

“Okay, let’s go munchkin.”

Wren was dressed in little combat boots, one of the flight jackets that Jose bought for her before she was born, and a pink tutu. She looked like a little combat princess as she strutted in front of Jose and Nat. 

For a nearly four year old, she had a lot of personality. Maybe too much for her own good. But Jose loved her daughter with all of her heart. There wasn’t a thing in this world that she wouldn’t do for her.  

“Thank you for coming today,” Nat nudged Jose with her shoulder, “I know it means a lot to Jake to have you guys here for this.”

Jake was set to be a part of a super important Legacy flight, one of the only f-18 pilots chosen. He couldn’t stop talking about it for weeks prior. Jose wasn’t sure if she’d ever seen him so excited for something related to work before. 

“We couldn’t miss it,” Jose shrugged, “Wren wouldn’t let me.”

“Mama we see Unca Yake?” Wren asked. 

Jose couldn’t help but smile at the way that Wren said Uncle Jake. They were still working on her speech, but the little munchkin was getting better and better every day. 

“Yeah sweetheart, we’ll see him soon, I promise,” Jose replied, “But let’s find Gampa Mav and Nenny first, okay?” 

She nodded enthusiastically and wiggled a little in Jose’s arms. Little Florence loved Maverick and Penny, now lovingly known and Gampa Mav and Nenny. They stepped right into the role of grandparents to Wren without a second thought. They were there to support Wren and Jose with no questions asked, even after Jose forced Braldey to leave. 

They never once asked what happened between the two of them. Instead they just loved Jose and her little daughter with all of their hearts. 

“Gampa Mav!” Wren wiggled out of Jose’s arms and took off running towards the older pilot, “Nenny! Auntie ‘Melia!”

“Shit,” Jose cursed, chasing after her little girl. 

Wren jumped into Mav’s arms, hugging the older man as tightly as she could. Mav laughed and hugged her back, not seeming to notice the fact that the little girl ran off without her mother. Penny was a little more attentive and scowled at the little girl as best as she could. 

“Wren, what have I told you?” Jose was out of breath as soon as she reached them, “You need to stay with me!” 

“But I saw Gampa Mav and Nenny.” The little girl blinked up at her mother, not seeming to understand. 

“You can’t run off-”

“Mav! There you are!” 

Jose froze. She didn’t dare turn to look at the source of the voice. A noise escaped her, sounding like a small wounded animal. She didn’t even check to see if they were going to be here today. Normally she checked every air show, but Jake was so excited that she was going to come and bring Wren.

“Bradley,” Mav said, handing Wren over to Phoenix who finally caught up, “Didn’t expect to see you until later.”

“I had a second and saw you guys over here.”

Wren looked at Bradley with wide eyes. He was in his blue and gold flight suit, looking like a hero in his own way. Wren was mesmerized by any pilots. She loved planes, and the people that flew them. 

“You fwy pwanes?” 

Bradley was stunned for a second. He finally realized who was standing next to Mav and Penny. She looked so different, and yet exactly the same. Her hair was longer, and she was thinner than he’d ever seen her. So much so it made him wonder if she was eating enough. But he didn’t have the right to worry about Josephine Wilson anymore, not when she kicked him out of her life. 

“I uh-” He cleared his throat and directed his attention to the little girl in Phoenix’s arms. 

Somehow it hadn’t occurred to him that this was the little baby he once loved with all of his heart. She was so much bigger, with wide eyes that mirrored her mother’s. She looked just like Jose. There’s no way that wasn’t her daughter. It made him want to cry. He loved her like a daughter and he missed out on so much of her life. 

“Yeah, I do,” Bradley smiled at the little girl, forcing down the emotions. He leaned down so he was eye level with her, “See that blue and yellow plane over there?” he pointed down the way a little to where all of the Blue Angels were lined up, “That one is mine.”

“Woah,” She replied, “Auntie Nat can we go see?”

Nat carefully looked over at Jose, who still hadn’t allowed herself to look over at Bradley. Jose nodded quickly, watching as Nat along with Mav, Penny, and Amelia made their way towards the row of planes. 

Jose swallowed the thick lump in her throat. She felt like she could cry. She always did her best to avoid Bradley at any event that the Blue Angels could be at. Jake always understood. He hated it, but he understood. She wanted to be mad at him for not warning her that he would be here today. She felt tricked and like her heart was going to explode.

“Jose.”

She closed her eyes and licked her dry lips before opening her eyes and turning to face him, “Hi Bradley.”

“It’s good to see you,” He said slowly, carefully even. 

“Yeah, um, you too,” She replied, “You look good.”

“I am. Pensacola has been good for me,” He replied, voice sounding like gravel. 

She nodded. She wasn’t sure what she expected him to say. What do you even say in a situation like this? How is she supposed to do this? How was she supposed to face Bradley, when all she wanted to do was be held by him again? She wanted to feel his lips on hers again. She wanted him more than she could dare to put into words. 

“You look…nice,” Bradley had to force the words out. He wanted nothing more than to hold her. 

“Try keeping up with a three year old, see how you look,” She responded quickly. 

“No, I didn’t mean it like that. I genuinely meant you look nice.”

She looked down at her little sundress and sighed. She hated this feeling between them. This rift, the distance…whatever it was. She wanted to feel close to him again. But she didn’t know how she could ever feel close like she used to. 

“She’s gotten so big,” Bradley was looking over his shoulder now, looking towards Wren, “She was so tiny when I left.”

“Bradley about what I-”

“Bradshaw! Time to get ready.”

His eyes closed as he took a deep breath. His shoulders squared before his eyes opened again and he was back to being Rooster. He forced a smile and held out his hand for Jose to shake. How do you even shake hands with the man you’re still madly in love with?

“Nice to see you again, Josephine. Look for me in the skies.”

She wanted to say more. Wanted to beg for his forgiveness. Wanted to beg for him…just for him to give her a second chance. But he was gone before she had the chance. He disappeared into the crowd of people like a leaf disappears in the wind. 

Jose was still holding her breath when Natasha came back to stand next to her, “Mav has Wren. Are you okay?”

Jose’s eyes started to water, “I didn’t realize how much I missed him. And then he’s right here and I can’t say any of the things that I want.”

“You’ll get your chance,” Natasha assured her, “Now c’mon, Jake is up next. Don’t want to miss him.”

Later that night, Jose was sitting in her bed alone. Wren was staying with Jake and Natasha tonight, so the house was silent. Jose didn’t quite know what to do with herself. So she poured a big glass of wine and settled in. What she didn’t expect was her phone pinging at eleven, with a text from a number she never expected to see again. 

She found herself scurrying out of the bed and fumbling her way to the front door. Her breath was ragged as she threw the door open to reveal Bradley standing there. He looked too good to be true. 

“Hey,” She said stupidly. 

Bradley was on her in an instant, hands cradling her face, “Tell me you don’t want this.”

“I-” She took a second, “I want you. I always have.”

Then he was kissing her like she was the only thing that mattered in the whole world.

[dwellordream]

“…First and foremost, one of the strongest and most fundamental influences on medieval scholarship about women throughout the entire Middle Ages was the bible. Christian writers relied on the bible because of the fact that it represented God’s holy word, and as such offered important and (at least theologically) irrefutable ideas about women, the majority of which cast women in a decidedly negative light.

To be sure, there were (and still are) biblical verses that portrayed women in a more favourable – even militant – light, such as Deborah, a prophetess and leader of Israel who helped guide the Israelite army to victory over the Canaanites, and Jael, who it is written killed the Canaanite general Sisera, but the overall image of women is a negative one. Various passages throughout the bible reiterated how women were supposed to be, for instance, silent in public, submissive to their husbands, periodically unclean to touch, and scheming seducers of men.

Yet it was the Genesis story of creation and the Pauline Epistles which were to exert the most influence upon medieval conceptions of women. Indeed, Paul himself used the Genesis creation story, specifically the idea that women were created of man and that they caused the Fall of Man, to justify man’s superiority over women and show how women cannot be trusted and require male guidance. Similar concerns about women were displayed by the early Church Fathers, whose writings bridged the gap between the biblical and the medieval period and helped formulate much medieval Christian doctrine.

Their thought is indicative of why later medieval conceptions of women were primarily negative. There is, for instance, the uncompromisingly misogynistic view of writers like St Ambrose (c.338- 397) and St Jerome (c.347-420), who contended that ultimately women were the root of all evil and defined them primarily as lustful beings who must strive for the ascetic life in order to be reconciled with God. Only through a life of reflection and controlled living could women achieve salvation, for nothing else would suffice.

A slightly more temperate view is that of St Augustine of Hippo (354-430), whose writings, for various reasons, were highly influential in shaping the attitudes of the western Church in the Middle Ages and beyond. He adopted a more subtle approach to the issue and argued that although God only made man in his image and not women, both sexes resemble God at the level of the soul, a level which occurs whenever anyone from either sex contemplates or spiritually seeks out God through prayer and religious devotion. In that activity gender becomes redundant, and they both resemble God’s likeness.

Nevertheless, despite this spiritual unity of the sexes, women still differ from men physically and can only ever hope to be man’s helper, as noted in Genesis, thus it is only when a woman is together with her husband that she forms the image of God. By identifying women’s inferiority in their bodies therefore, Augustine was free to highlight the inherent sinfulness of the body and hence argue that women were more prone to sin and must be under male control.

Patristic and biblical sources, therefore, were highly influential in shaping High and Late medieval conceptions about women. Yet in order to understand one of the key writers in this area during the high medieval period, Thomas Aquinas, it is necessary to understand the work of Aristotle (384-322 B.C.), whose ideas about the nature of women remained virtually unknown in Europe until the mid-thirteenth century, but which then became an important base for later medieval discussions about women. We shall come to the rediscovery of Aristotle shortly, but first it is necessary to explore the essential elements of his thought.

He was, of course, the student of another great classical philosopher – Plato (c.428-c.347 B.C.), but unlike Plato, who suggested that men and women could to a certain extent participate equally in political life and military matters, Aristotle’s work left no doubt as to the subordinate and inferior role women should play in society. The clearest expression of this inferior status is found in Aristotle’s Politics and his ideas about the natural hierarchy of beings. This book described a natural order of ruler to ruled, where he contended that just as tame animals are by nature better than wild ones and should be ruled by humans if they are to be preserved, so ‘the relation of the male to the female is by nature that of better to worse and ruler to ruled’.

Such a statement leaves little doubt as to the subordinate role women naturally assumed in relation to men. Nevertheless, evidently trying to clarify and further distinguish the nature of this male-female relationship, he states that within the household the male rules over the female ‘for by nature the male is more fitted for leading than the female’. The male’s right to rule ‘by nature’ stems from the fact that, although women have the ability to deliberate and make decisions, they are nevertheless ‘not in control’ of this ability. In other words, women are able to reason, but they are unable to control their passions, unlike men, who can both reason and control their passions, and who therefore should rule over women.

Moreover, nature makes things for only one purpose; for women, their natural role was in bearing children and tending the household, which left the men free to practise politics – a role that accorded with, and was dictated by, nature itself. As a consequence, women must also be excluded from military participation, since, as Aristotle notes, ‘the political way of life...[is one]...divided between the needs of war and peace’. In other words, war was a political – and by implication – male-only affair. Women’s natural procreative purpose and inability to be in full control of their reasoning capacity shut them off from any political rule or military participation.

Important as these ideas would become in later medieval thought, however, they found no traction in medieval political thought until the mid-thirteenth century, when firstly the Nichomachean Ethics and then the Politics were translated into Latin in 1246/7 and c.1260/65 respectively. Their translation formed part of the larger rediscovery of Aristotle’s philosophy in the medieval West at that time and coincided with the flowering of Aristotelian studies in the universities at Paris and Oxford during the 1240s and 1250s.

Amongst the first to engage with this rediscovered material was Thomas Aquinas (c.1225-1274), whose Summa Theologica (written 1265-1274) is notable for the way in which it wove together the patristic writings of the early Church with the emerging naturalistic Aristotelian world view into a text which has been described as ‘at once more androcentric and less misogynist than the patristic inheritance’. More specifically, Aquinas helped synthesise the rediscovered works of Aristotle with more traditional Christian notions regarding the body-soul duality, and in so doing offered a new foundation and justification for male superiority in the physical world.

Adopting the Aristotelian idea of a natural hierarchy, in which those with more rationality ruled those with less, Aquinas applied it to the Christian tradition by placing God at the apex of a divine order of beings, over which He had supreme control. In this divine order man was possessed of a better intellectual capacity than woman, and although both sexes had a rational soul, men’s greater ability to reason made them naturally superior to the female sex, and the logical rulers of society. Women, on the other hand, were a sex created solely for purposes of reproduction and no other, since procreation was the only task which unquestionably required male- female cooperation, and in all other tasks man would be better served by another man in fulfilling that task.

Moreover, although women help ensure the survival of the species, Aquinas maintained that ‘man is yet further ordered to a still nobler vital action, and that is intellectual operation’, as man’s ultimate goal must be in striving for rationality through the perfection of the soul. Thus, in his conception, women serve an inferior bodily-related function, unlike men’s role as leaders and the natural rulers of the world in which they live. Furthermore, while both sexes have a rational soul and are formed in the image of God, men nevertheless have this image in a superior form to that of women.

In essence, therefore, Aquinas used Aristotle’s ideas on natural order to assert that the inferiority and subjugation of women was a natural state of affairs, and in so doing he helped reinforce the biblically based arguments earlier Christian theologians (such as the Fathers) employed to justify the subordinate position of women. Additionally, it is clear that his conception of women’s avowedly domestic social function left no place for women to fight in medieval militia or command troops.

In Aquinas’ view, women’s only true hope for equality with men lay in the resurrected state (after death) where, because both men and women are possessed of a rational soul, both sexes are able to come together in worshipping and loving God in a place where there is no need for any form of carnal expression or coitus. Thus, only once free of all bodily processes and temptations is Aquinas willing to afford women equal standing to that of men. For all his efforts to reconcile Aristotelian philosophy with the bible, however, it was not Aquinas but rather one of his students, Giles of Rome (c.1243-1316), who in fact made Aristotle’s ideas accessible to more than just a university audience.

His lengthy mirror-of-princes work De regimine principum (c.1281) – dedicated to the future French king Philip IV (1268-1314) and intended to help guide him in governance as well as princely conduct – was highly popular and widely translated into numerous languages (even today more than three hundred Latin manuscripts still survive). Indeed, it has been described as ‘the most successful product of the mirrors for princes genre’, probably because it was one of the few such works to bridge the gap between lecture theatre and noble household. This success can be attributed to the way in which Giles distilled the ideas contained in Aquinas’ work and presented them in a very readable and systematic format.

While the specifics of Giles’ arguments as far as they relate to female militancy are presented in the third subsection, for now it is enough to note that it was his work that provided the most publicly accessible expression of Aquinas’ political thought and of women’s supposed inferiority to man. Examining the development of political and theological thought up to its fusion in Aquinas’ work, therefore, there was evidently a generally negative, even hostile, attitude toward women, combined with a broad denial of any possibility that they could be useful for any public leadership role. It is fair to ask then what prejudiced these men, and many others not mentioned here, against women, why they were so unwilling to acknowledge that women could reason, and why they were so quick to denounce their sinfulness.

Although it is possible that individual experiences may have influenced what these authors wrote, the clearest explanation for such attitudes is that women’s roles were classified on the basis of their biological differences from men, and they were held to a different standard because of it. As Susan Okin notes, philosophers and theologians were led to define women ‘by their sexual, procreative and child-rearing functions within [the family]’, thus theoretically constraining the roles which women might perform outside of private life. Moreover, by linking women to temporal and less rational bodily processes, Christian theologians could argue that women were more prone to suffering a loss of control or reason (for instance, during sex), just as the first woman, Eve, was the one tempted and who caused the Fall of Man.

Invariably this line of argument led them to conclude that all women were inferior to men in practically every way and that their only conceivable temporal purpose was as an aid in reproduction. Such sweeping generalisations suggest that there was a subtle, if ill-defined, male fear of ‘female sexuality and reproductive functions’, perhaps because the vast majority of medieval authors were members of an educated but celibate clergy who rarely came into contact with women and were, consequently, quick to point out the supposed faults and weaknesses of women.

Furthermore, we cannot rule out the role patriarchy had in shaping negative views of women in the High to Late Middle Ages. Patriarchy emphasised a certain core set of male-centred values and beliefs that included such qualities as strength, logic, rationality, calmness under pressure, control and toughness – all of which were well suited to the political and military arena. In medieval times (and even today) this meant that more traditionally ‘feminine’ values, such as cooperation, equality, compassion, and emotional awareness, were not emphasised and consequently less valued, especially when it came to war.

As a result, medieval authors espoused a general belief in the universally passive or timid nature of women, as opposed to the ‘active’ nature of all men, which they used to help delineate the differences between the turbulent (but logical and rational) male world and the more tranquil female domestic sphere. Thus, female involvement in public affairs would have challenged or compromised the traditional image of men as the ones who engaged in public activity and who defended those believed to be unable to defend themselves, namely women and children.”

- James Michael Illston, ‘An Entirely Masculine Activity’? Women and War in the High and Late Middle Ages Reconsidered

[prose-for-hire]

Creature of the night

Pairing: Spike x vamp!reader

Request: 22 off the Halloween list with Spike and reader because I think it be hilarious and adorable Don’t take the requested for swapped though😊, I don’t ever wanna add to my friends anxiety

Requested by: @shy-ginger-in-the-graveyard​

Warning: Blood mention. Swearing.

A/N: The sentence for this was "I can't be a vampire! I'm a fucking vegetarian!" and I hope this is what you wanted !! 🖤🦇

You woke up slowly. You had slept deep, the kind of sleep where you didn’t know where you were after you opened your eyes. Deep and somewhat satisfying. Your joints were stiff as if you had been in the same position for a long time. You sat up slowly, as if you were wading through a thick liquid. Your senses telling you to rest, you felt dizzy. Strange. Something was off. You felt like someone was watching you. It almost made you shiver.

You had been lying on a beat-up couch. One you recognised. Spike’s place. You sighed, relieved. At least you knew where you were. That was something.

“Finally - You’re up! Thought you really had gone and bloody died there for a moment, pet” His familiar British accent rattling around your brain. He had eagerly been waiting for you to awaken.

“Wha-?” You asked, rubbing your forehead “Why do I feel…”

“Like you’re on top of the bloody world? Like you’ve met the face of salvation?!” He smiled, moving closer so he could put a hand on your shoulder. He had been checking on you every so often, anticipating this moment. He had dug up your grave himself. Didn’t want you to have to contend with your own coffin. Some may say it was a vampire’s rite of passage. But he didn’t necessarily care for tradition. It was pretty nasty and he wanted to shield you from certain horrors. And introduce you to more delightful horrors.

“I was gonna say queasy…” You muttered, managing to haul yourself into a more comfortable sitting position as he moved his hand. A light frown on his face as he watched you trying to navigate your body as if it was something alien to you.

“What do you remember, pet?” he asked, there was something beside him, but you were still getting used to your sight.

“Uh… y-you offered me a new life” You said, squinting at the fuzzy figure in confusion before meeting Spike’s face again.

“And..?” he asked, holding back an eyeroll at how slow this was going. Your eyes widened, you remembered it all so suddenly. The face. The biting. His arm cradling you as you collapsed against him, losing consciousness.

Vampire. Spike, the man you had gotten to know had revealed himself. As a vampire. And that must mean…

"I can't be a vampire! I'm a fucking vegetarian!" You scream at him suddenly, not able to believe what had happened.

“Yeah, you’ll get over that, pet” he shrugged, he hadn’t expected that to carry over to your death, “Try this” he added, shoving the once fuzzy figure onto your lap. The figure became clear. It was a man. A man with a weakening pulse. With blood leaking from his neck. You stared down, blinking hard in case your eyes were deceiving you.

“I don’t want to try that!” you exclaimed, still staring as you heard his heartbeat slow to a stop.

“See? Dehumanisation. You’re already half-way there!” Spike smiled, a hint of pride as he patted your shoulder and left the corpse draped over your lap.

He watched you for a while, concern and something you didn’t understand yet in his eyes. He didn’t really comprehend why you weren’t so excited. Being turned had been a true revelation for him. His deliverance from the mundane. He had thought that was what he was giving to you. He stared at you for a while, you weren’t really doing much. You were just sat there letting the corpse which was still draped over your lap go cold.

He moved from where he had been sat opposite you, kneeling before you and looking you directly in the eye. Maybe he should explain. Maybe he should prove the care he had harboured since he had first seen you as a human almost half a year ago now. Your eyes cast back to the ground, the body slid off your lap and Spike never moved his eyes from your face. He didn’t care for the body but he did care for you, which is what he was willing you to understand.

He looked up at you, still kneeling as his hands rested on your thighs. He rubbed his thumb softly as he paused, trying to find the right way to phrase what he felt.

“I chose you… I saw your potential. I’ve never done this for anyone before, only you” He insisted, pulling you to look him in the eye, “I’m falling for you, love… can’t you see? Together, we’ll be unstoppable. You just have to trust me”

You frowned but nodded, sliding a hand over his. He had always made you feel safe. But currently you were unsure. You had agreed to it but you hadn’t quiet understood. You hadn’t thought it through. You didn’t eat animals, let alone humans.

It was a few hours later and you were pacing around Spike’s crypt. At least it made more sense as to why he had never gotten a real house. You had just thought he was cheap. How stupid you felt now. How naïve.

Was every human like you once were? Willingly stupid. Happily ignorant.

Spike offered to take you out. To stretch your legs. He wanted to teach you some things. To show you the wonders of what being undead could show you. He slung an arm around your shoulders and he smiled to notice it was the most relaxed you had been since waking up. Your feelings hadn’t changed. You had whispered affection and both hinted subtly of your love for the other.

“Let the night consume you. Feel it. Enjoy it” He said, his arm stretched out as as if he were showing you something amazing. The hint of glee in his voice that faltered once he saw your facial expression hadn’t changed. You were frowning. Confused. You were staring around the town as if you had never seen it before.

It was Halloween. Neither of you had realised until you saw all of the costumes surrounding you. You faltered slightly as he did. He should have turned back but he shrugged, asking you what you wanted to do. Saying you could pick anything you wanted.

You chose to crash the Bronze. You attend the Halloween party that always somehow ended in a disaster you managed to miss. He had rolled his eyes, but stopped short of saying something belittling. He wasn’t the biggest fan of the place, but for you he would go. It meant he was on hyper-alert, checking around from any threat.

The band was loud, louder with your heightened sense, and you felt it vibrate through you. Rather than a heartbeat, the only beat inside you was the heavy bass of the music.  You closed your eyes, enjoying the feeling. A ghost of a smile on your face. He smiled at you, he had always loved your smile. You couldn’t help staring at you as you looked around as if you had never experienced life before. As if you had never been to the Bronze. As if you had never heard music.

He liked watching you enjoy yourself. He offered a hand to you, and lead you onto the dance floor. He pulled you into him and you danced close. Swaying together in the centre of the dancefloor. Not caring about what anyone felt or thought about the pair of you.

You leaned in further, you found you were enjoying yourself. It was still him. You and him. You found yourself encased in his smell, it was stronger than you had ever remembered. But you allowed yourself to get lost in the smell.

That was until Spike abruptly stopped dancing. You saw his frown and started to ask what was wrong. His jaw tensed and then you sensed it.

You turned, confused. You smelled her first. She smelt so sweet but there was a little bite to her scent too…

You turned completely, coming face to face with the Slayer. Spike had immediately stepped in front of you. He knew he had to ensure your safety. You were new to all of this. You were inexperienced. He wanted you by his side. He couldn’t lose you – you had just started your unlife together. From behind Spike, you couldn’t help staring. Your stomach started to grumble and you rubbed it in a circular motion.

You were entranced by her. This Slayer. She made you hungry. She made you angry. You scowled in her direction, an involuntary act. Your hands balled into fists. Spike traded insults with the woman, who was dressed as a fairy tale character you no longer cared to recall. You stepped forwards, so that you were beside him. Buffy raised her eyebrows at you and muttered something derogatory. You lunged forwards, but Spike pulled you back. He smirked approvingly, stroking your back soothingly. Now you were getting it. You were finally getting it.

Spike was going to walk away, knowing that it was best to have a plan before taking on the slayer and he had only been wanting to show you a good time tonight. He should have known better than to leave the crypt on Halloween.

He decided to steer you away, whispering lowly to wait it out. To spend the night getting used to your new life. To each other. He didn’t want you to get ahead of yourself. You nodded. The girl started to turn away, wanting her night off and deciding she would deal with the both of you when she could be bothered. She was sure of herself and knew she would catch up with the both of you eventually.

But as she turned, you caught her scent so strongly it made you hiss slightly. It was primal. It was strange but you couldn’t feel embarrassed over it. It was a part of you now. You were slowly learning this.

You ran straight at the Slayer, your hunger for her blood overtaking your once understandable reservations. Spike’s eyes glinted with pride as you started matching blows with the slayer. You were a quick learner.

When he saw her inevitably take the upper hand, he stepped in. Protecting you. He kicked her full-force in the stomach, leaving her stumbling backwards as you shrugged off the humans that were trying to subdue you. He took your hand and pulled you as fast as he could out of the Bronze. You ran through the streets, checking behind you every so often.

That really was enough for one night. He wanted to teach you more before you stepped up to the slayer again. He wanted you to learn to preserve yourself first, maybe let him take on the slayer. He didn’t want to risk you. He wanted to get to know you more intimately. But this told him he had chosen correctly. That the potential he had seen, the love he had wasn’t unfounded.

Now, all he had to do was make sure he got you safely away from the Slayer before he lost you as soon as he found you.

[finitepeace]

this week i read...

Darling, Keep the Lights On (Until I Get Home) by capsicleironman  💙

Summary: When Steve Rogers is awoken from the ice early, he is assigned as the personal assistant to Tony Stark, the man on TV with the strange glowing light in his chest. The plan was simple - protect and gain intel. It was supposed to be just another job, but then again, nothing in Steve's life has ever gone according to plan.

Iron Man 2 Divergence where Steve ends up working for Tony instead of Natasha, and his interest first in the arc reactor and then in Tony himself, leads him through the events of the Avengers, Iron Man 3, and Captain America 2.

17k words 

It's Only Half Past (The Point of Oblivion) by LadyHabren (equalopportunityobsessor)

Summary: "I think it's generally agreed that all of Steve's senses are powered up by the serum? He can hear people whispering on the other side of the room, probably sees a hell of a lot further, etc.

But there are definite downsides. How does Steve control this side effect of the serum?"

Captain America is more than a man - he is a hero, he is an ideal, he is pure muscle held together by patriotism and moral fibre... And not even Captain America can fight it when his own brain turns against him.

4k, sentinel/guide au, not set in mcu, 

Do-Over by gottalovev  💙

Summary: Steve woke up six months ago into a future that leaves him indifferent. There is work, and not much else. His current mission is a basic search and rescue operation to retrieve an American who was kidnapped by a terrorist group ten days ago. He won't let the fact that the hostage is Howard's son be a distraction.

14k words, ironman 1 - 2 but with steve on it!, 

Calls Me Home by steve-capsicle-rogers (adorable_lab_rat)

Summary: Tony can't help but notice the far away look on Steve's face. The visible pain and loss. It wasn't right and giving Steve back everything he'd lost was the right choice. The right thing. And honestly Tony didn't do the right thing near enough.

9k words, post avenger 1, tony time travels to victory day with steve to make him happy 

Memorial by hanyou_elf

Summary: Here rests in honored glory an American Soldier known but to God.

Steve visits Arlington's Tomb of the Unknown Soldier in lieu of visting the tombs of those he's lost.

600+ words, steve visits his grave and tony supports 

Damaged by orphan_account

Summary: Prompt: Can you write a story where Tony is having heart problems again even after the shrapnel and arc reactor is removed, like he needs a pacemaker or something please? :)

Steve is worried about Tony after the doctor tells them Tony needs a pacemaker. Tony being Tony decides to build something better.

2k words, arc reactor + health problem 

Warning by laireshi

Summary: Tony's left arm hurts.

100 words, angst post-civil war au 

Told You Dirty Jokes Until You Smiled by ChibiSquirt  💙

Summary: Steve was waiting at light, casually checking out the man in the car behind him, when his phone pinged.

75k words. WIP T_T . steve is cap but tony isnt ironman (yet?). steve is awaken before ironman 1 and meets tony, proceed to have friends with benefits arrangement... 

blood, Lies, and Love by Ridley160

Summary: When Steve Rogers volunteered for Project Rebirth they told him they would make him a hero. No one bothered to tell him that the serum would change him into a monster that needed to feed on the blood of the living for survival. Now he has woken up 70 years in a future where there are more like him and his affliction is now seen as gift. Only Steve is convinced that he is at his core still just a monster.

Then he meets the brilliant, quirky and charismatic Tony Stark, the only person in this crazy new world that seems to understand Steve's misgivings about what he is, but Tony is haunted by something. A secret he has carefully guarded for many years that forced him to push everyone away.

33k words in 13 chapters, steve is cap + a vampire but tony isnt ironman, 

Blood Loss by wisia

Summary: The serum really did work a miracle. It created Captain America, and Tony would like the serum to work a miracle on him too. If only he didn’t fall in love.

5k words, set in captain america 1st avenger, tony is scientist/adventurer looking for a cure for his heart problem 

scientific Heresy by antigrav_vector

Summary: In the process of running the particle accelerator in his basement and fixing the arc reactor, Tony finds himself flung into the past where he has to take on a fight not his own if he wants to get home to stop Vanko. At least he had a chance to replace the old rector that had been killing him with the new one before everything went sideways... But now he has no choice but to face off with family, friends, and old heroes, and none of that sounds remotely appealing. Well, okay, getting to meet them all during their glory days kinda does.

But as it turns out, they're not exactly what he imagined, and his path home is a lot longer than he'd hoped it would be.

And a lot more complicated.

34k words in 12 chapters, time travel au @ cap 1 and ironman 2, steve/tony/bucky 

we will meet in another life by theappleppielifestyle

Summary: Tony is there instead of Howard during Project Rebirth. He ends up following Steve into the Howling Commandos, into the Atlantic ocean and into the 21st century.

6k words, canon divergence. 

Keep on Beating by itsallAvengers

Summary: There were an awful lot of things Steve loved about Tony. But one thing in particular Steve could never get enough of was his heartbeat.

6k words, self-sacrificing tony strikes again and steve is upset.. so tony comes to a solution... 

Coming Up Roses by NobodysBloodyPrincess  💙

Summary: Those with a death wish referred to the High Commander’s infatuation with the late Tony Stark as an ‘obsession.’ They were wrong. It had to be more than that, after all there was no word for what the High Commander was about do in the name of making things right.

No one gets a redo of life… no one except High Commander Rogers that is. Everything is coming up Roses and Sunshine for him. After all, he has a dream and it’s going to come true.

41k words in 3 chapters, beautiful but a bit dark and sad, just like the author said: “‘i’ll be with you till the end of line’ but stony”, definitely one of the best fic i’ve read because THEY ARE HAPPY T_T 

The One With Bucky's Biggest Fan by justanotherpipedream

Summary: Steve still can’t believe how long it took for him to notice. It wasn’t a secret really, just something that no one had cared to ask...it honestly took Rhodey pulling him aside and pulling out an old photo album, before Steve really understood.

Tony Stark was a Bucky Barnes fan.

(aka The one where Tony is the biggest Bucky Barnes fanboy, Steve is a supportive boyfriend, and Bucky is perplexed by it all.)

2k words, it’s all in the summary 

Sins of the Mother by skullshy  💙

Summary: All she could see when her eyes closed was Steve’s face in the courtroom. Stern, pained— with that fucking all-American self-righteousness.

Toni wondered for years whether it would have made a difference. Told him that she was pregnant, that Ultron was to protect their baby, and how sorry she was.

On her worst days, she imagined it wouldn’t have mattered.

23k words in 23 chapters, female tony stark, civil war (or age of ultron?) canon divergence 

So this is bonded life by Captainstark12

Summary: Steve had been protecting the human village from hydra creatures like him for five years. And now he was ready to take his prize as he had the privilege of choosing an omega to bear his child. Hopefully his chosen omega human would want him back as much as he wanted him

4k in 6 chapters, mythology au 

I don't think there's a manual for this by itsallAvengers

Summary: So. His son can stick to things, apparently.

If only Tony had realised this before he'd caught him hanging off the 89th floor of the tower.

Well. Parenting was never going to be a smooth road, was it?

2k words, stony adopts peter parker and then they become superfamily 

For Your Eyes Only by SarahHBE

Summary: Every soldier looks forward to mail call. But Alpha Steve Rogers gets a big surprise with the letter his Omega, Tony Stark, has sent him.

2k words, explicit bcs of sexual content 

It Was Just A Matter Of Time by babynative

Summary: The clock was ticking. And then, black.

719 words, civil war canon divergence, angst 

This Can't Be The Last by MusicalLuna

Summary: Hours after a mission ends, Tony's heart starts to race.

1k words, tony had a heart attack, but not angst! 

The Billionaire and the Army Captain by Neverever

Summary: Facing finanical ruin and needing to care for his sick daughter, Steve Rogers agrees to marry Tony Stark, who needs to get married by his 30th birthday to inherit. It's just a job for Steve until he starts to fall for the enigmatic billionaire.

12k words, non-powers au, 

Adopt by greenteeth  💙

Summary: Steve's life is the same as usual. He goes to work, fights super villains, banters with other Avengers and goes home to an empty apartment. Until the son of an old friend shows up asking for help, well sex first, then help. Suddenly Steve is married, fighting super villains, worrying what Obadiah Stane and coming home to Tony most nights of the week.

42k words in 17 chapters, ABO, tony is not iron man, the story is complete but it’s a part of series that seems to never see the light T_T 

The Act of Creation Will Be Your Salvation  by scifigrl47  💙

Summary: When Tony Stark was seventeen years old, he built his first AI. On that day, he ceased to be his father's creation, and became a creating force in his own right.

That one act likely saved his life, and not always in the most obvious ways.

84k words in 8 chapters, stony but mostly looking through his AI bots a.k.a. jarvis and dum-e, definitely one of the best fics ever! 

Bewitched, Body and Soul by iam93percentstardust

Summary: Almost ten years after joining the British Army, Steve Rogers returns to his childhood home after his mother's death. The house seems quiet in a way that it's rarely been. But the peace is shattered when his oldest friend stumbles into his home and into his life, seeking an escape from an arranged marriage to a cruel lord. Steve provides that escape but finds himself engaged to be married instead. This wouldn't be a problem - except that Steve is, always has been, and always will be deeply in love with Tony Stark.

16k words, regency AU, ABO,  the classic stony misunderstanding trope 

Right place, right time by hkandi, ralsbecket

Summary: An alternate take on the Captain America: The First Avenger movie. Tony is working with his dad to help out the SSR on this new project, though he and Steve happen to run into each other before that, and sparks fly from the start.

8k, CA: First avenger AU with tony stark present