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coveholdenmyluv · 9 months

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R. Braun - Honey Soaked Promises

synopsis. In which you reminisce on your quest for revenge, irrigated with broken promises and fermented with betrayal, allowing you to act as the judge between life or death for yourself and the viper dressed in the skin of the love of your life.

— or alternatively, in which you make the stupid decision to fall in love with the wrong person on your journey to freedom...

Oh well, you'll just have to kill him now.

series masterlist

chapter warnings. slight manga/ending spoilers, foreshadowing, fluff

chapter synopsis. During your very first look into your past, you plan your escape from your personal hell with Stefan and Cielo. Was that your biggest mistake yet?

I| Trepidation. 10.5k words.

"You ain't gonna die, you sappy girl, I won't let him harm you both. I promise, no bullets will be goin' into either of your heads."

Oh, Stefan. He always keeps his promises… Can you?

Honey; such a sweet and savory essence. Seemingly everlasting on the tongue, for even if doused in a reservoir, the stubborn residuum remains.

Honey is entirely what you descried, from the age of ten to however much longer the gods above will allow your heart to beat. It's all you ever saw and all you ever want to see; you realize.

Honey is what you see right now. His eyes, albeit drained and tainted with Titan marks, stare directly into your own. They beg and plead for you to save yourself, for he could not bear to let the sole person that kept him from ending his own life, depart from this cruel world. Because as cruel and bloodcurdling as it may be, the world can be beautiful and altruistic. He's seen it himself. And he knows, he can feel that all the war and carnage will soon come to an end. Scars, emotional and physical, will remain but allow for mending and tranquility. He wants that, yearns to finally conclude the great torment that he's endured since childhood but more than anything, he wishes that for you.

He wants you to let go, and the irony isn't lost in him as he recalls the fact of how laboriously he prayed for anything but that, just four years in the past. He knows that you haven't had the courage to, that you've held onto every memory, every feeling and every touch you've shared with each other, no matter how hard you tried for the opposite. He knows because he too has clutched them just as close. The only difference was that unlike yourself, he never once attempted or even wanted to forget.

So as you hang upside down, with one hand grasping his tighter than ever before, your fingers reminiscent of interlacing threads of fate. Your tresses falling into view and drifting in every which direction the wind sways it, and the wire that tethers you to the enormous bones that assemble Eren Jaeger's final Titan, straining. You realize that you're being given a choice.

Will you let go of the only man you've ever truly loved? That man that has been the core cause of the vast anguish that has plagued not only your life but the lives of those you adore dearly and leave a place for inside of your heart. The man with cavernous honeysuckle pools for eyes and short but soft sandy blonde strands of hair. The only man you've ever kissed.

The only man you ever want to kiss.

Or will you let yourself fall with him? Fall into the depths of you don't even know what it is that you'd fall into; all you know is that you'd be falling with him. Sink into his arms before the angel of death embraced you both just as tightly.

Will you let go or will you fall with him?

But before you make that choice, let's take a look at the journey that has lead you to this very moment, shall we?

Year 845, The Underground City.

The second underground city located within the interior of Wall Maria, or more specifically, beneath. A crowded old city where the rats laid, never to catch sight of or feel the burn of the suns rays or the fresh breeze carding through their hair. Buildings stacked upon buildings and the only source of light being fire, whether originating from lanterns or arbitrary flames ensued by citizens in their fits of rage.

You could've considered it a tight knit community wherein everyone knew of everyone. Some would greet in passing and some simply wouldn't. It was not abnormal to see brawls on the cobblestone streets, it's not as if anyone was there to put a stop to them.

Otherwise, known as home.

Being so close to the outer wall and underground seemed to have deemed the population a lost cause in the eyes of authority, if any, in the underground.

You couldn't have fretted over that fact too much. It's what had allowed you to live as long as you did, in the absence of parental figures. The only person that even came close to a caregiver, was Stefan.

Twelve year old Stefan, whose face was embellished with radiant forest green pearls and shaggy, dirty blonde hair that caressed his forehead. He too was in the absence of parental guidance and resorted to taking the burden upon himself.

The burden of raising six year old, Cielo. A pale skinned boy with a small button nose, deep mercury eyes, and equally as dark hair that was a black bordering blue.

Along with ten year old you. With short, blunt, H/C hair that had barely reached the lobes of your ears. The older boy had the idea of sustaining your short length due to the hassle that maintaining proper care for your soft tufts, came with for everyone involved, considering your living situation. Every month there was to be a day dedicated to Stefan, being the only one trusted, to wield his blade and put it to proper use on all three of you.

That is where your story began. In the abandoned building you used as a safeguard for as early as you could remember. Sat in an old and creepy wooden chair that Cielo had spotted on the outskirts, not too long before that day. A makeshift mirror was before you, consisting of jagged pieces of broken glass that Stefan had somehow assembled. How he always managed to scavenge a way to make things work in your favor was beyond you.

No matter the situation, Stefan had a solution. You wished to any unknown god, if there was one, that you in some way or shape or form had taken after him. That Cielo had seen you even in the slightest light, the same as you had gazed at Stefan.

"Why're you starin' at me, ya creep?" Came Stefan's silken but teasing voice. The corner of his lips was upturned to convey his failure in masking his amusement.

His question had effectively pulled you from your dream like stare. You wondered how he even knew of your unwavering eyes, for he hadn't given you a spare glance. "'M not staring at you, I was looking at the terrible job you're doing today." You had lied, obviously, all the while hastily shifting your head towards the ground in an effort to hide your embarrassment of being caught in the act of exactly what you had denied.

A loud hiss came from behind you, presumably emitted by the blonde, "I told ya not to move, idiot!" He exclaimed as he crouched on the ground and clutched his palm to his chest.

The millisecond his knees hit the cold ground, you were beside him in a panic, "Shit, I'm so sorry Stef! I swear, I didn't mean to! Do you need me to grab something to clean you off-" A muffled snort cut your hysteria short. You hadn't previously paid it heed but his body was shaking from the struggle to retain his quiet giggles.

He was fucking with you.

"I hate you." -you didn't mean that.

"You don't mean that," He stated as he lifted his head and allowed you to see how flushed his cheeks had grown from the strain he endured in order to fool you. "That should teach you to stay still while I have a knife in my hand."

"Whatever. Are ya done, or are you gonna take another two hundred years ruining my hair?"

He stood and mussed your head, causing your hair to grow more tortuous than it had already been from the way he had repeatedly combed his slender fingers through it during the chopping process. "Perfection takes time, and I think I'm as perfect as it gets when comin' to making you look like a little boy. But yes, I'm done." He satirized.

Mimicking his signature accent, you quipped, "Gee thanks, ya want me ta get Ciel' now or are ya gonna let the poor fella sleep in a while longer?" You pointed a small finger to the petite boy snoozing in the corner of the room. He was leaned against the wall with Stefan's jacket thrown over his form for comfort. Finding the abandoned building and being allowed to stay was a miracle in of itself, so you never fretted over not owning any sort of bed or bedding.

"Nah, if I don't wake him now he won't want to sleep through the night. Why don't cha' go and see if you can snag us some dinner? Anythin' will do for today, s'long we eat somethin'." He said, ignoring your attempt at mocking him in favor of gliding over to the boy in topic.

"Kay, I'll be back in a bit. I'll see if I can get us some bread this time!" You exclaimed, already having the door swung open.

"You be careful now. If your bum ain't back in twenty, I'll drag you back m'self." He warned as he referred to your habit of conjuring trouble with, anyone really. Well, more trouble than thieving already placed you in.

"Alright, promise I'll be careful." You reassured as you waltzed out into the street and shut the door.

You began your journey into the center of the city, not too far from home, pulling your brown hood over your head. Stefan had encountered the sweater somewhere, when he was on a previous supply run. It hung off your body too loosely then, but you had begun to fill it well.

From the minuscule amount of memories you had gathered at that point in your life, you concluded that Stefan and you had found each other when you were about Cielo's age; just a year younger and Stefan two years older.

He had lived with his dad before he was murdered by Military Police once they found him attempting to escape to the surface. Why the military police were roaming the city was unknown to you at the time, but they'd always seemed to show themselves when they were needed the least. Stefan's father never planned on taking him along, he planned on leaving his seven year old son to rot whilst he got to live out his fantasies. You couldn't recall Stefan ever speaking about it. The only words he would utter were 'good riddance', but you knew it affected him more than he led on. You'd caught him crying on some nights, and unfortunately there wasn't much you thought you could do. So you simply allowed him to hold you while you pretended you were still asleep.

Two years after you two had decided to stick together, three year old Cielo had quite literally ran into you both as you were on your way back home from gathering dinner. He was wailing hysterically and frantically pointed to the small building he had called home.

You had seen him in passing before, and while he always stuck close to his mother, he never failed to wave back at you two. When you arrived at his home, you had already guessed what you would find before you even opened the door. The air reeked of death, more than usual, and you wondered just how long little Cielo had endured living with a dead mother. It was a miracle he hadn't caught whatever it was that had stolen her life but that never mattered to the small boy. His sweet mother was gone and didn't seem to ever be returning.

He moved in that day and while he had always been the quiet type, after that incident he hadn't uttered a single word. You had longed for the day he would allow you to hear his soft voice again, and it pained both you and Stefan that he had to experience such trauma so young.

That wasn't to say he was all gloomy either. The boy would still be seen smiling and if you looked real close, at times you swore you could see a teasing grin on his face when he'd done something mischievous, like hiding Stefan's shoes.

They were all you knew. You had no memory of any parent or family. All you could recall was wandering alone until you had found Stefan. He had insisted you pick out your own name.

You formed your own found family. Stefan was the reliable oldest child, you were the curious one that had no qualms with starting or ending fights with the people that aimed to wrong you or the boys, and Cielo was the baby brother who stuck to you two like glue.

You were content... mostly. Theonly addition you could've thought to wish for was-

Sharp chirping had snapped you out of your stupor. Letting your ears guide your irises, you noticed a tiny winged friend had been trying to garner your attention.

Brows furrowing, you thought to yourself, 'What's a bird doing here in the underground?'

Squatting to the ground, you reached a hesitant hand out to the young animal. It didn't cower in fear, so in return, you didn't withdraw. You can still remember how velvety their feathers had felt on the pads of your fingers. Placing it onto your palm, you noticed it was missing a leg, the singular one twitching in your hand. Nothing seemed wrong with the wings so you had wondered why it didn't make use of them to flee.

You knew that if you had attained wings, you would have escaped your pit of hell and never looked back.

That was a lie. You'd do so, but only to procure a certain pair of boys.

"What's wrong, hun?" You spoke gently, "You don't seem afraid, so why don't I take you back with me? Show you to Ciel, I bet he'd like that." You grinned softly.

The bird made no objections, so you placed your new friend in the confines of your pocket, made sure they didn't suffocate and quickly continued your way to the center of the city where the stalls had stood. To any other person who had walked by, it looked as though you were simply taking a leisurely stroll. What they had failed to realize was that you had swiftly swiped a couple of stale loafs of bread, along with a few apples.

What you had failed to realize was that you had done that far too many times for the stall runners not to be familiar with your game of 'catch me if you can'.

"Don't try to be sneaky kid, I saw that! You better be planning on paying for those!" The man hollered.

You took that as your cue to book it before he could've begun to chase you.

Once you had arrived at your home and entered the building, you saw Cielo perched on the seat you had previously occupied. Stefan's jacket was still wrapped around his form, and his eyes were droopy as if he still hadn't fully awoken.

"Back so soon? Aw, did'ja miss me that bad?" Stefan had drawled from behind the ravenette.

"Stef, shut it for once and look!" You squealed as you bounded up to the two boys, hand retrieving the animal that rested in your sweater pocket.

"The hell is that?"

"A bird, you idiot. I found it on my way to get dinner!" Your statement had piqued Cielo's interest and caused him to hop off the chair to take a look into your hand.

Gesturing dubiously to the animal in your palm, Stefan conveyed his thoughts, "Y'know, when I said dinner... I meant somethin' we didn't have'ta cook, right?"

Eyeing the sharp weapon in his grasp that he had gestured with, you scolded, "Careful with that, Stefanie," you teased him with the nickname you knew he hated, "and don't be stupid, I brought bread and apples for dinner." You retorted.

"Ew, don't call me that, you nuisance."

"Look, Ciel. It's a baby bird. Tiny, just like you." You told the boy as you brought it to his eye level with one hand and booped his nose with the other.

Cielo's eyes had sparkled like a million different crystals as he took in the appearance of a bird. He had firstly admired the feathers and beak, hesitatingly reaching a small finger to its head, allowing it to slide down the slope as silk morphed into the bill. As they made contact, Cielo's eyes had begun to grow misty and his lower lip trembled.

Alarmed, you retracted the animal from his sight and begun to panic, "What's wrong, Ciel? Why're you crying? Did it hurt your finger? Let me see." You said and hastily grabbed his finger to inspect.

"Great, now ya made baby Ciel cry. Nice goin', N/N." Stefan scolded lightheartedly. It was quite obvious to him why Cielo had begun to cry but he could tell that you hadn't caught on just yet.

Turning to glance at the blonde, you defended yourself, "I-I didn't mean to, I swear it!" Focusing your attention back onto the boy before you, you offered, "I'll take the thing out if that's what you want, Ciel. I promise."

The child simply shook his head quickly and rapidly blinked in an attempt to dispel his tears. It didn't work. He reached for the bird and cradled it in his small hands, gazing at it with a fond smile as brand new tears dribbled down his chubby cheeks.

Stefan knelt beside him and placed a hand atop his shoulder, "I don't think those tears mean what ya think they do, N/N." he uttered.

"Hm? Why else would he be crying?" You inquired.

"My guess? They're happy tears." He explained, a soft smile peeking at the main attraction in the younger boys hands.

"Happy... tears?" You repeated, the words had felt foreign as they slipped off of your tongue.

"Mhm, now I wonder why such a free thing like this one would show up here of all places. 'S it hurt?" He asked and you shook your head in response. "Hm, weird. I reckon this lil' guy is yearnin' to go on home. Out onto the surface, that is." He stated as he stood back up.

Cielo's eyes had widened dramatically and he placed the bird gently back into your hold. Latching onto the taller boys sleeve, he had begun to hop frantically.

"Nuh-uh, I know what yer tryna say and the answer is and will always be, no. We're not goin' to the surface, baby Ciel." Stefan said sternly, his head only furthered his point as he shook it.

"The surface? You want to go to the surface, Ciel?" You'd beamed, heart accelerating at the mere thought. The boy bobbed his head enthusiastically as the twinkle in his eyes grew so intense, you almost shielded your own at the sight. His smile had been huge and scintillating.

You remembered that you had asked yourself, 'Is this what the people on the surface feel when they look at the sun?'

"Y'knowhow I feel about that, Y/N, don't ya dare encourage him." Stefan reminded and you knew immediately what he referred to.

It wasn't that Stefan hadn't dreamt of journeying to the land above, everyone down there did. The difference with Stefan, was that that dream was forever tainted by the mistakes of his father.

"You know, I heard about some people from the first underground city that escaped and got to the surface. Apparently they joined the military or something? Anyway, I bet they're enjoying the sun right now." You informed him softly, before you gently nudged your shoulder with his and continued, "Planting flowers?" You said pointedly, knowing the boys fascination with the blossoms.

In the scarce amount of books you were able to acquire, the way in which Stefan's eyes would linger and brighten when you read or admired pictures of anything floral, never escaped you. He was nowhere near an expert on chrysanthemums, dahlias or anything of the like but that didn't mean his enchantment was any less impassioned.

"Oh yeah? Good for them. Unfortunately, we aren't as lucky. As much fun as that sounds, it's way too risky. If the bird doesn't go back on its own, then I'm afraid it'll have to stay with us for the time bein'. "

Cielo's eyes grew with worry and he gestured to the animal still in your hands. "Ciel is right, it'll die down here, Stef!" You pleaded.

You had never actually believed that it would, it was simply an excuse to allow Stefan to spare another thought about venturing outside. You knew that, Cielo knew that, and Stefan knew that. Still, as weak as the excuse was, it was enough to force the boy to ponder.

"Even if we would, how would we even do such a thing?" He asked exasperatedly. As much as he had loathed the idea, that didn't mean he didn't want to step foot on the surface. He had wished for it more than anything. Dead father be damned, his heart yearned to take you both to see the sun set and the moon light the sky.

"The supply carts! They always come around midnight, and once they arrive, the guards switch shifts. Maybe we can find an opening and hitch a ride out of here!"

"That sounds way too easy. I'm sure the guards expect people to do exactly that, so I doubt they'd be so lenient. They probably double check the carts for stowaways." He explained as he crossed his arms over his chest.

"Except, the guards that work the supply carts are the same ones that have run them for years. No one has escaped since I can remember, everyone has given up. Those guards are lazy and hate their jobs, I doubt they properly double check. But even if they did, we could bring something to cover ourselves with. It's a foul proof plan Stef, c'mon!"

It wasn't a foul proof plan. It was full of flaws and risks. Anyone with a right mind in their head could tell so. But you were a kid, so that fact was lost on you. And unfortunately for the three of you, Stefan was also a kid. No matter how wise the boy may have been, Stefan was twelve years old. A traumatized little boy with a grand amount of baggage on his shoulders and a curious heart in his chest. So the mere possibility of escaping his very own prison, blinded him of the fact that maybe it wasn't such a good idea, but instead, a life altering cataclysm.

Curiosity killed the cat.

The blanket of silence fell over you three, uncomfortably- for different reasons. It felt uncomfortable for you and Cielo because you could almost see the way Stefan's mind had gone haywire as he mulled over your proposition. It felt uncomfortable for Stefan, because now that the excuse of escaping had presented itself, he felt even more trapped than before. Restricted in his own body.

"...We're gonna need a big blanket."

That night was a rare one, where the citizens of the underground gathered and celebrated. What is it that they had celebrated? You never knew. In all honesty, the gathering was most likely a made up bash by your people, to give each other something to look forward to. You never minded, of course. Those nights were usually in such disorder that the three of you wound up taking from stalls that were left unattended or gambling on the outcome of random fights that would unravel. It was nights like those that you were blessed enough to witness humans in their intended nature. You gazed at more smiles than any other nights combined.

Contradictorily, that night, you used the commotion as a distraction to board the carts that went up and down the entrance of the city. Stefan had miraculously acquired a blanket that was made up of stitched together cloths, to be used as a cover. The carts had arrived at midnight, as usual, and took a couple of hours to unload. It was almost daybreak which meant that the carts were to soon take off.

Stefan and Cielo were given the task of watching your six as you proceeded with your mission of initiating a distraction. In addition to the cover, Stefan had also gotten his hands on a sweater that he designated to Cielo. It had oversized pocket holes with the intention of allowing your bird to stay hidden within the journey.

After you detected Stefan's signal, informing you that the carts were good to go, you took action.

The center of the city was fully crowded with people idly standing and chatting, sitting and eating and others aimlessly exploring. You had waltzed up to a stall cluttered with buyers, inconspicuously slipping through the groups. As you drew closer, your nose gradually caught an indescribable and inescapable essence that it had never before encountered. There were so many things unknown to you during that stage of your life, countless questions unanswered, but the second you caught a whiff of that stubborn scent, it was the only thing your mind knew.

You were sure it was something that could've only been sold on nights like those and even then, most citizens wouldn't have been able to afford the enigma. The shorter the distance between your body and the stall supplying your hyper-fixation, the stronger it gripped your lungs. It engulfed you, suffocated you in a way you found that you didn't mind.

Addicting.

You stuck close to the man in front of you who was leisurely strolling by. In one swift motion, you swiped two bottles of the sweet nectar you became enamored with and gently placed one inside of the man's pocket, doing the same to the other one for yourself. Then, came the easy part.

Drawing in a large breath of air, you yelled at the top of your lungs, "Ooh, he's stealing! He's selling the sweet stuff this guy is selling!"

Simultaneously, gasps erupted from within the crowds and the man in charge of the stall had begun to berate the man that was accused. Standing his ground, the man didn't simply take the insults and begun to defend his honor.

It didn't take long for a brawl to break through with random people who weren't even involved, joining. You would've loved to stay and watch till the end but that was the exact opposite of your goal.

Fleeing in the direction of your escape route, a decent amount of men in Military Police uniforms had slipped by you in an effort to quell the commotion. You thanked your past self, of five minutes, for choosing a particularly sturdy man that could defend himself or else you would've felt poor for him.

You caught up to Stefan who held Cielo in his arms and began to sprint as fast as your short legs could take you. "Do you think that'll be enough?" You asked through a series of pants.

"Let's hope so." Stefan replied, equally as breathless.

The carts were near the entrance of the city so it was inevitable that the path towards it was slightly steep. Just as you had hoped, most of the guards had fled to aid in yielding the tussle that had enacted further into the settlement.

Without a word, Stefan aided Cielo in climbing into one of the front carts and then quickly hopped in after, cradling the boy to his chest. You joined them both, lifting one leg after the other but as you did so, your foot had gotten caught in one of the handles, creating a loud bang.

The sound was not monstrous enough that the citizens within the plaza would pay any heed but enough that if there were any guards near, the noise would not be disregard-able.

Unfortunately for you, there were.

The look Stefan had given you demanded of you to keep moving and get in.

Regardless of your anxiety sky rocketing, you leapt inside and placed yourself between one of the walls of the cart and Cielo. All of the carts had a slidable door, so with trembling hands, you slowly shut the top, enclosing the three of you into the tight space. Stefan had placed the blanket over your trio and clutched the sleeve of your sweater subconsciously. He was nervous, rightfully so, and so were you and Cielo.

Your slip up that had occurred just a couple of seconds before, had caused two of the soldiers that were set to keep guard to trek back towards the entrance to confirm that there were no problems. You heard each of their footsteps as they investigated but in the end, it had yielded nothing.

That was until the small bird in Cielo's pocket had begun to chirp, ear-piercing squeaks.

"The fuck is wrong with her?" Stefan had whispered harshly. You were surrounded by darkness so you never knew who exactly he was looking at, but you knew he was genuinely asking, the stress was what had brought the edge to his voice.

"I don't know. Cielo isn't smushing her or anything, she might be afraid of the dark?" You answered, and since none of you had any idea of what to do next, you simply awaited the moment she would settle.

A man, who you assumed was a guard, had slurred, "What's with the noise? 'S that a bird?" You could tell he had most likely helped himself to the cheap alcohol on the streets, the inebriation had been clear within his voice.

"I don't know, let me double check inside the carts and make sure we didn't trap one. Don't know what it'd be doing all the way down here though." Said another man, that one definitely had not slurred.

You heard the lids of other carts being slid open, one by one, and had begun to panic. Your heart beat could be heard pounding through your ears and though it was most probable just your imagination, you swore you heard two more rhythms beating in sync.

"Shit. They're gonna find us, we're so dead." You whispered to no one in particular.

"Let's just keep quiet and stay put. She's quieting down now, so hopefully he'll leave-" Stefan began, but came to a screeching halt when your cart lid began to part.

Light had entered through the sheet over you and allowed you to view the panicked expressions engraved into both of the boys before you. Cielo's mercury eyes were misted over and Stefan's emeralds were as wide as saucers. His hand was clutched into the pocket that you knew he had kept his blade in, and you begged with your own eyes to wait. Not yet. You still held onto hope that the man would overlook you and carry on.

But then the sheet draped atop your forms was slowly peeled away and you were met with a man that sported a dark head of hair, styled in an almost mullet and paired with an aspiring mustache and goatee. Your breath halted as your eyes met his, as if that would make you invisible.

He had slid his dark eyes to Stefan next, the boy only gradually slid his hand to clutch you protectively, effectively squishing the younger boy between you two, in the process.

His charcoal irises met Cielo next and you had seen them soften the slightest bit for the boy. He had his back to Stefan and was squeezing you for dear life. Dusky eyes glazed with fear, bottom lip quivering and the tiny bird one of his hands as he cradled it to his chest. His mouth ceaselessly shaping the word 'please' onto his lips.

The atmosphere was static for about ten seconds, each one torturous. Tendrils of fear creeped into your lungs, effectively cropping your quickened breaths that threatened to escape your throat as you awaited the fated reaction from the man who held a long gun in his right hand.

"Did'ya find it?" Slurred the other soldier once more. He seemed father in distance than the one you had a staring contest with. The soldier hesitated, mouth gaping and shutting repeatedly.

"...Yeah. It's just a bird, I'll dispose of it once we get back up." He announced and slid the top closed once again.

Not a single soul moved a muscle for a long minute after that and you were unsure if it was in disbelief or simply because you were all still scared shitless.

"...what the hell..." Stefan found the strength to whisper, his blonde hair mending with his forehead as it clung with the perspiration that had been caused by his nerves.

"He didn't snitch..." You whispered in astonishment.

"He didn't... we are some lucky sons of bitches, N/N. I hope you know that. Someone from beyond is lookin' out for us."

"Don't get your hopes up, we're not out of the forest yet. H-he might want to deal with us once we get to the surface. Let's just wait it out for now." You suggested, tremble clear within your voice.

"Right." He agreed, before you heard the shuffling of clothes and he continued, "You alright, baby Cielo?" He whispered softly to the child in his arms. You felt him nod his head lightly before burying it further into your chest.

The cart jerked suddenly before it began to move and up they proceeded, one by one. The organ nestled into your chest felt as though it had been replaced with a jackhammer.

"Oh my gosh, Stef- I'm so nervous." You informed him as you squeezed your eyes shut.

"I know, don't worry-"

"This is actually happening, what if he kills us-"

"I won't let him-"

"If he does end up putting a bullet in our heads, I want you to know that I love you."

"I- er. Well, really? I love you too-"

"You and Cielo are my family, I love you both more than anything-"

"We know, love.-"

"I'm a snide piece of shit sometimes, but I'm so sorry that I convinced you to do this-"

"No, you never-"

"I mean if you think about it, if I never found the bird that day, Cielo wouldn't have had the thought of escaping in his mind-"

Your adamant rambling had gotten caught in your throat as you felt your fingers being interlaced. Warm digits carded themselves through the gaps between your own, a gentle squeeze being pressed into your palm. In milliseconds, your mind was quelled and a soft exhale escaped your lips.

"I'm sorry." Your voice was barely audible.

"You have nothin' to be sorry bout." He reassured you as gently as he could. There was no hesitance or shake in his statement, he genuinely believed that fact.

"If we do die, I'm glad that the last thing I'll see, will probably be your faces." Although you were enveloped in darkness, you still allowed yourself to gift a soft smile in the vague direction of both boys.

"You ain't gonna die, you sappy girl, I won't let him harm you both. I promise, no bullets will be goin' into either of your heads."

"You can't promise that."

"I just did."

Stefan had a knack for leaving you speechless. "...thank you."

That sentiment was heavily reciprocated. "...shut up."

The entire ride took a whole ten minutes to complete, and since you had infiltrated a cart towards the front, it was one of the first to arrive.

Footsteps approaching rapidly reached your ears and then the cart lid was swung open. The blanket that shielded you from the world was thrown off of you and your eyes took their time to adjust to the altered lighting, but soon enough, you saw him. The same soldier from before, donning the tan jacket with the green stallion emblem plastered on his left chest pocket. The only difference was that he had his gun aimed directly at your trio.

His expression was intense and his body seemed rigid as he ordered, "Get out now. Run and don't look back. Get to a nearby city or village and don't tell anyone where you're from just yet. Wait a couple years to do so and never come back again." His brows met in the middle of his face as he further took in your appearances. "You guys are so small... what the hell? Where are your parents?!" He inquired.

"W-we're orphans." Stefan informed him and it surprised you that he had stuttered. It was then that you noticed he had already sat up and spread his arms to block both you and Cielo from the guns barrel.

"...go. You never met me, got it?"

"Yes, sir." You both replied in unison.

Stefan was the first to spring into action, hopping out of the cart and hoisting Cielo to his side promptly after. You wasted no time to follow and landed on the earth with a thud. Stefan didn't hesitate to take the soldier's advice, taking your hand in his left and Cielo in his right arm before breaking into a sprint in the first direction he turned to.

Your head had begun to pound, probably from the sun that had risen in the sky by then, and your lungs in-took as much oxygen as they could handle. Imagine your surprise when the air around you didn't taste stale and humid but instead as if you were drinking freshly fetched water. As you were running, the scenery encircling your form began to decelerate. Your eyes absorbed every defining detail that they could hold.

The glistening green grass, the scorching rays of sunlight that drew its claws into your skin, the prodigious trees in the distance. They seemed almost unnatural to you, with flowers blooming in between every leaf that protruded from within the ragged intwined branches.

Those leaves, they reminded you of Stefan's eyes.

The air felt significantly fuller out in the surface, it filled your nostrils and you found that there existed no scenario in which you could get enough. Your lips parted in your heaving and whether that was in result of your physical strain or your enchantment with the ventilation didn't matter. You felt as though you had taken your first sip of water in the midst of a drought.

You vision began to turn blurry. A side effect from the difference in environment, perhaps? No. Your eyes were wet with the tears dribbling down your face before you could even register their presence. But you weren't sad- no, anything but that. Those tears had felt amazing, as if they held the key that liberated your soul.

'So, these are happy tears?'

You craved for more.

And then a flash of blue entered your peripheral. It was different from the one that had painted the canvas above you.

Sapphire blue wings, but they were not alike the small bird that was cradled into Cielo's chest. Those wings lacked feathers and looked smooth to the touch. It crossed your mind that it had to be an insect, being that it was smaller than any bird you had read about. It swayed with the wind and was what you could only describe as beautiful with the beauty that left its mark on the mind of every and any being that had the blessing of gazing upon it.

It soared and it fluttered, and you found yourself wishing to be even the slightest bit as ethereal and unrestricted as that small being had been.

"Wow... so this is the surface..." You uttered in the most lightest voice that Stefan had ever heard.

He directed his head towards you, hand still grasping your own, with the intention of stealing a quick glance. He really should've known better. It was never only a quick glance when it came to you. Inevitably, he found himself with the compulsion of the inability to detach his irises from your delicate face.

That smile was the most irradiant and prodigious he had ever seen dance across your lips. You were crying, but he knew it was not a matter of pain. How could it be, when your eyes whispered a completely different synopsis?

You were gazing through the expanse field and his heart hurled him through a flurry of individual emotions in a matter of seconds.

Bliss, excitement, contentment and love.

He adored your expression so much so, it forced him to have sought out what it was that had driven you to that high you were riding. And then he saw it too, every detail sunk into his hippocampus just as they did in yours. The glistening green grass, the scorching rays of sunlight that drew its claws into his skin, and the almost unnatural prodigious trees in the distance with flowers blooming in between every leaf that protruded from within the ragged intwined branches. And the butterfly.

'Oh, that butterfly.' His voice cooed within the confines of his own mind.

It was the second most beautiful thing he had laid his eyes upon, and seeing it so carefree and selfish allowed himself to picture his youngest self finally breaking the bars that made up the cage he enclosed himself in, deep in the pits of his soul. He too found his eyesight becoming blurry.

Those mesmerizing green eyes grew glassy, reflecting his most favorite scenery.

He directed his attention towards the boy in his arms, there sat the first most beautiful sight the world had offered him. Cielo's smile.

Cielo's gigantic grin that enveloped his face, only being rivaled by your own. Both of those expressions he had appointed as the most paradisical he had ever seen, and he had gazed upon them one after the other in a span of seconds.

Then you both had stared at Cielo. Baby Cielo's face that radiated bliss. His dark hair had gotten messier by the second with the wind carding its delicate fingers through his fluffy locks, caressing every crevice of his face, every nook and cranny. The sunshine bouncing off of his pale skin and making it seem as if he was glowing. His once deep mercury eyes almost mimicking a navy blue, and you wondered if they had always been that color.

The small boy shifted those eyes to the even smaller bird that laid in his hands, lifting it into the air ever so slightly. The animal immediately responded with rapidly flapping its wings, an action that startled the boy, but had not thwarted his advance at lifting it up even higher, encouraging the bird to take off into the vast empyrean sky. And it did, effectively causing boyish giggles to erupt from within Cielo's lips as he had found his new favorite color.

And oh, he couldn't believe his eyes. There were clouds, so many of them. They looked so soft that he found himself wanting to touch them, lay in them, and wrap himself in the fluffy substance. His arms outstretched and he felt as though he had been so near; just a hop away and they'd meet his stubby fingers.

Stefan leaped, to Cielo's surprise. He wondered to himself if the older boy had mind powers or anything of the sort.

Nevertheless, his fingers never met the clouds but he couldn't care less. Not when he was so blissful. Not when both the people he adored most in the world were just an arms length away and had worn those enchanting expressions. And they were laughing, hypnotic sounds that he fell in love with because it was the very first time they had ever laughed like that. As he always had and always would, he followed their lead and joined in the giggle fit.

It'd been a beautiful seen really, full with contentment and carelessness.

You had run for about twenty minutes straight by the time Stefan had informed you about a settlement nearby that a friend from the underground had told him about. He told you it had not been too far from where you where at, so a short break would be fine. He placed Cielo gently onto the ground while you both caught your breaths. Your calf muscles burned and ached but for some reason, you didn't dislike that feeling paired with the blaze in your lungs. Running was fun to you. No one had spoken yet and the only sound that was heard was the in sync heaves both you and Stefan dealt.

Until Cielo burst into another hackle of giggles and began to race through the grassy field you stood upon. His little legs had taken him in a such a rush, you had begun to worry because it almost seemed as if-

...he fell face first onto the ground.

"Cielo!" Came both of your voices in unison.

But instead of the wailing you had expected, his cries of joy grew louder as he flipped onto his back and began to roll around on the grass.

Hesitantly you asked, "Cielo... what are you doing, love?" But he paid no heed and continued to cackle like a madman. Or boy. That was the closest you had gotten to hearing his actual voice, so you complained no further.

The boy then abruptly sat up and brushed his palms against the dewy blades of grass with a satisfied expression that spoke words worth a millennia. Dragging his gaze up towards his favorite people, he patted the empty spots beside him, encouraging you both to take them. Of course, you obliged without a second thought.

As you took the seat to his right and Stefan to his left, you mimicked Cielo's earlier actions and glided your small hands over the velvety blades. A thud came from next to you, emitted by Cielo throwing the rest of his body back onto the grass. It was only then that you realized what he wanted.

Something so simple yet so Cielo of him to want to do. He just wished to enjoy the moment with you. And so you too plopped yourself into the grass next to him, Stefan followed after. Twisting your neck to face both boys, you found something obstructing your view. It was dainty and dewy, much like the green blades encircling it, with purple petals that glistened and swayed with the breeze.

A flower.

It was only then that you noticed the abundance of them on the field you laid on. Each one a vibrant periwinkle shade. The sight caused you to flip onto your tummy and lay your head to rest on one of your arms, the other had reached out to caress the silky petals.

Unbeknownst to you, Stefan watched on with the most softest expression one could give another. One exuding adoration and love. He then quietly scanned the grass around him and plucked the first stray flower he found, taking a couple of seconds for himself to gaze at it admirably.

In one slow motion, he reached over Cielo's body and tucked away the short strands of hair behind your ears, any that were long enough at the time. Then, he gently placed the delicate flower right along with them, sitting back and admiring his work when the deed had been done.

The loving gesture wasn't lost on you and your eyes had quickly found themselves attempting to catch a glimpse at the fragile plant nestled behind your ear. After you realized that you wouldn't be able to, you opted to instead move your eyes to the older boy that was now within your range of vision. Green and purple would compliment each other beautifully, wouldn't they?

Plucking your own violet treasure from the ground beneath you, before you gifted it to the boy, you decided to place a sweet kiss atop the corolla. Since you had both sat up at the point, the nimble flowers journey to its rightful place behind his ear used little to no effort.

As you sat back and admired each others work, it was as though the sole reason they had sprouted was for that exact moment. Minds working in sync, you both looked to the boy between you who gazed back with a fond smile. In unison, you searched for another pair of blossoms before placing kisses atop the supple petals and tucking them both behind the younger boys' ears. Yours on the right and Stefan's on his left.

Once they had both been placed in their rightful places, you both drew back and glanced at Cielo's expression, surprisingly finding the fat of cheeks painted a baby pink.

Slowly, as your mind digested that fact, your felt your own warmth spread across the bridge of your nose, only stopping short of your ears.

As if having a domino effect, Stefan's skin followed directly after your own.

And so, you sat with warm cheeks and flowers behind your ears with the only two boys you had ever known, feeling as though you were the only three people who ever existed, heart feeling full at the thought.

But of course, gaining a taste of freedom always seemed to make one drunk with pleasure therefore craving for as much as they could get their greedy hands on. Give an addict an inch and they'll yearn for a mile.

So as the sun had set and you threw yourself back onto the ground after an intense game of tag, with your chests heaving and the flowers you took such care to place having long since fallen back onto the earth where they came from, the conversation that would soon become your core drive throughout your pre-teen and teenage years, began.

"What kind of flowers are these?" You asked, one hand twirling a stem in between your index and thumb and the other placed as a cushion behind your head.

Stefan had taken his time to answer and that alone was your first sign that something else had been roaming around his mind. "I'll tell ya, if you promise me somethin'." He responded, eyes piercing the sky.

"What is it?" You inquired, interest being piqued.

With a dreamy sigh, he announced the thought that had plagued his mind, "Promise that one day, we'll see what's beyond the walls."

The idea had baffled you at the time, since it had never once crossed your mind of going beyond the barriers that separated you from what was unknown. "What? Why would you wanna go beyond the walls?" You asked incredulously.

"Why wouldn't-cha? If we ever get the chance to, I wanna see what lays beyond them and then after that, I wanna see what lays beyond that and then what lays beyond even that."

Exhaling in your surprise, you continued, "You mean the titans? I know we've never seen one, but that doesn't mean they suddenly stopped existing. Did you forget why the walls are even there?" It was a genuine question as your mind couldn't even begin to comprehend asking for more than what you had then.

Stefan had always been a dreamer through and through. "Well o'course I haven't forgotten and I'm sure those titans are scary as hell. But, let's pretend they weren't there, wouldn't ya wanna see what the world you were born into has to offer? Yer birthright? Like, all of it? There just has to be more out there that we haven't even begun to imagine, what if this is just the beginnin'?"

"Well yeah, but I don't know. I don't really like change and I feel like that would change a lot." You responded hesitantly.

"We're experiencing change right now and you seem to be doin' just fine." He challenged.

"That's cause you're here."

Covering his face at the flush that ensued because of your statement, he chuckled, "And I'll be right there if and when that happens, both of us will." He gestured to himself and the young boy in between you two. "Nothin' could ever split us up. We'll be the wonder trio till the end." He assured.

Humming in thought, you answered, "...I guess that wouldn't be too bad then. I wonder what's out there." Your mind had begun to race with ideas, most of which consisted of greenery and the jewels you had seen in old tattered books. "Other than titans, of course."

"Guess we'll have to find out. So, promise?" He extended his pinky towards the both of you, knowing that although Cielo still hadn't uttered a word, he wouldn't hesitate to be included.

"You haven't even told me the name of the flower, Stef. I ain't stupid." You reminded lightheartedly.

He seemed to have genuinely forgotten the exchange you agreed upon, so you didn't fret too much, "Oh, right." He uttered before he tilted his head to glance at the flowers scattered around you. "Those are bellflowers. Though their scientific name is campanulas and they signify gratitude, humility, attractiveness, and everlasting love."

They also represent disappointment and foreshadowing events, though till this day, you didn't know if Stefan had known that fact and withheld that information from you or if he truly was clueless. And if he did know, why had he kept it from you?

Giggling like the naïve child you were, you interlocked both of your fingers and awaited the third to join. "Thanks Stef, I promise."

Instead of raising his pinky finger, Cielo had decided to grant you both what you had been secretly imploring for years. "I promise." Came the smallest voice ever spoken, followed by an even tinier digit placed between your own.

Your heart skipped a beat and you halted your breath as your body entered a temporary state of torpor. A moment of silence had followed and Cielo allowed it because he knew he needed to let the action sink into your brains. He allowed his voice to marinate.

"C-cielo! You- you used your voice!" You exclaimed, finally finding your own as you sprung your torso up from within the grass and gaped at the boy below you.

In response, he simply but smugly, nodded his head.

Stefan had sat up too but instead of voicing his excitement, his wide eyes stared at him in astonishment. You would think Cielo had invented time travel with the look Stefan had given him.

"Say my name next! Come on say it!" You demanded with avidity, hands clutched together as you leaned into the young boy.

He didn't budge, opting to smile complacently, both hands now behind his head for comfort.

Breaking out of his stupor, Stefan joined in the exchange with a smirk, "Ya can't just drop that on us and expect us not to nag' ya. Come on now Ciel, say our names."

He shook his head again and forced you to resign in your attempts. It had seemed Cielo wanted to take baby steps, and that was fine with you.

"Fine, but we'll get it out of you soon. Don't expect us to let it go anytime soon. That lovely voice of yours deserves to be heard, at the very least by us." You told him with a smile, punctuating your statement with a boop to his nose.

"Mmm, yer just bein sassy with us right now, aren'tcha? Fine then, once you move out of that stage yer in, you won't wanna stop flappin' those gums to me." Even though Stefan had said it tauntingly, you didn't miss the tone in his voice that indicated how wishful of that he was. Nevertheless, he laid himself back onto the ground and began to admire the sunset, one of his lifelong dreams.

As the sun set and you watched the moon light the sky, the three of you were yet again mesmerized by the sight of what looked to be a million lanterns endlessly flickering. Even though you knew it impossible, that didn't hinder your attempt at counting every single ball of light that you saw in the canvas of navy blue. Navy blue that mirrored both Cielo's eyes and hair. Whilst pointing at certain clumps that reminded you of shapes, you soon fell into a deep slumber, still on the ground because back pain be damned, sleeping under the stars was just too good of an opportunity to pass up. Stefan had reassured you that village you planned on using as a safeguard would still be there the following day.

That night, in the form of a dream, you were shown what you assumed to be memories. To whom those memories belonged to, you weren't given a clue. All you knew was that you pitied the owner, for even the mere fraction of seconds that were bestowed upon you from which you lived through their eyes was much too heavy for your still fragile heart. Each and every snippet of the vague scenes that flashed before your eyes brought upon their very own powerful emotions. Each leaving you inundated, as if all the air had been stripped from your lungs.

A loose limb lied in a puddle of blood, dirt and cobblestone beneath it. Your cheeks had been soaked and throat sore, fingernails scratched at the ground as dirt collected underneath them and warm blood muddied on your fingertips.

The scent of a boy with disheveled light brown shaggy hair, as you rode atop a horse. Those same fingertips, now calloused, clutching the fabric he donned with a strength you'd never felt before. His welcoming aroma created a safe haven that flooded a sense of security into your chest. Despite the storm that brewed in your heart, caused by another reason unknown to you at the time, it allowed you to wrap yourself in a brief feeling of peace. That was a person with a heavy meaning in the owner's life.

Round and misty hazel eyes that seemingly reflected the world in them. Grief and despair showed themselves in wisps within their depths. The sight alone had caused your heart to sink and lip to quiver.

The one after was the most vivid, for it felt as though you could control your own movements. A sunset had doused the sky in a multitude of colors that ranged from blue, orange, red and gold; if you squinted well enough, you could see a splash of purple. Directly in front of you was what seemed to be a river, your socks discarded to the side and toes wet. There was a warm body sitting alongside you, mimicking your pose. Your cheeks had felt warm once again and you didn't know if the cause was the sun bath you experienced or something else entirely. All you knew was that you had felt prickles of bliss and tranquility within your own body, that was enough for you to yearn for just a moment longer within that headspace.

Then, soft pink lips invaded your mind in a fog. The faint taste of something sweet that you couldn't even begin to describe. Not when you were focused on steadying the rapid thumping within your chest. That had brought upon feelings that your mind couldn't even fathom existed.

A dainty white blossom that stood tall and healthy the first moment, only to appear broken and crumpled the next; cradled in one's palm. Your eyes had gotten glassier with each passing second as lachrymose had been thrusted upon you in that instant.

A gentle but strong woman with vibrant gold locks and crystal blue eyes that outshone even the jewels embedded within the crown placed atop her head. Pride is what your mind had whispered in your ears, only getting louder the longer you had stared at her. And then suddenly you were placed in front of an injured and dying man with tanned skin and mud colored hair that bordered black. His fingers were interlocked with yours as he mouthed something that you couldn't yet register. His eyes turned dull and his head lulled back against a tree.

A large body of cerulean water in your peripheral from what you could tell and there was a male in front of you, his face distorted in your vision. One of his legs had been missing but that didn't stop him from dipping the toes he had left into the depths of something unknown to you. That person had a serene aura to them, that much you could tell, and there was a lingering thought of accomplishment in your core.

A girl with a brown head of hair that teared apart a type of meat, one that you couldn't yet recognize, with her teeth. Tears cascaded down her cheeks in streams, but you recognized the look on her face. She wasn't experiencing heartache or anguish, instead, she was in pure bliss. And then in a flash, she laid on the ground in a different setting. Crimson pooled around her form and a pain you couldn't even begin to elucidate swallowed you whole.

The next few scenes only lasted split seconds.

A young boy around your age with dirty blonde hair and light forest green pearls that matched those of your Stefan.

An unusually round and fluffy plant that almost seemed, hairy?

A flat pastry that had been folded and drizzled with a dark substance.

More violet flowers, only that time, they were doused in alizarin crimson.

A boy with sleek dark hair that reached to about his chin and jade colored eyes that stared expectantly, a pleading declaration swam in the black pools of his pupils.

Sharp ivory claws.

Bones, colossal in size.

So much steam.

Wings?

And throughout each memory, almost acting as a shadow in the back of your mind, there had been a reoccurring sight.

A pair of honey golden eyes.

Each time they presented themselves in front of you, they projected a vast collection of emotions that ranged from ecstasy and pleasure to misery and regret and everything in between. There was so much pain, emotional and physical, within those short but constant moments.

Luckily for you, just as soon as they had been tossed into your arms, they were tugged away as though you had not been meant to remember such moments. And so that is exactly what happened. You were allowed to slip back into your momentary state of peace.

Looking back at it, you should've known. Should've known that it was all too good to be true, because of course life could not allow you to stay in your idyllic place in life, beside both Stefan and Cielo, no matter how tightly you cradled it with your very own hands. Because one second, it felt as though you were coddling the sapphire blue butterfly you had fallen in love with and the very next, that same insect disintegrated into ashes and slipped though your fingers. No matter how hard you tried or how long you spent scouring the flakes from the ground, you'd never be able to seize every piece that fell to the floor. And most definitely not without bruising your knees from the effort that got rewarded with nothingness.

Fun fact: Cielo did indeed see you in the same light as you had seen Stefan. He also did think you were as, if not more, ethereal as that butterfly.

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