#hugshughes folklore celebration

[hugshughes]

invisible string L. Hughes

Luke Hughes x fem!reader

synopsis - Luke had been one of your closest friends since childhood. Somehow, everything in both of your lives just came back to each other.

wc - 3.8k

contains - cursing, literally nothing, extremeeeeeeeee fluff, kissing, hugging, cuddling, (im just a girl ok), obliviousness, this is a bittttt cliche... THEY CONFESS AND KISS IN THE RAIN OK???? idiots in love, eating and drinking. TAKES PLACE SUMMER 2023 (like end of May???)

an - SLIGHTLY EDITED!!! im hunrgy. anyways THIS WAS SO FCUKINF CUTE TO WRITEEEEEEE. my luke baby is so invisible string😇😇😇😇. ugh i miss him. i (possibly intoxicatedly) karaoked better man by Taylor Swift the other night just fyi. my author notes are like my personal diary because i assume no one reads them. i could prob say my ss number and full name address and no one would ever know. do u guys know how fuckign embarrassing it is to reread a fic u posted a few days ago and find typos like u guys probably think im stupid and hate me now. this was not at all about Luke Hughes or Invisible String... ENJOY BABIES!!!!

-

green was the color of the grass, where i used to read in centennial park. i used to think i would meet somebody there.

You were what some would call a hopeless romantic. You loved love. You loved reading it, watching it, seeing it in real life, it was just beautiful to you.

You'd grown up with the Hughes boys. They were your neighbors during the summer, your family's lake house being next to theirs. You were the same age as their youngest son, Luke. You two were ride or dies during the summer, and when you finally got a phone in seventh grade, you two texted the rest of the year.

It was finally summer, your school year at Notre Dame had come to a close and you were able to fly home and go to the lake with your family all by May 13th. You watched the final Canes games against the boys, you were sad for them, but so proud of your best friend.

It was nearing June, and you were alone in the lake house, opting out of the afternoon boat ride for some peace and quiet. You walked through the halls, stopping at the dresser covered in summer photos. You and your brother, you and Luke, more you and Luke, and some of your brother and the Hughes.

teal was the color of your shirt, when you were sixteen at the yogurt shop. you used to work at to make a little money.

You noticed one of your favorite photos wasn't there, the one of you and Luke when you were about 16, you're both standing behind the counter at the ice cream place you two worked at during that summer. You spent all day with Luke during those days, and it was the best.

You opened the dresser the photos sat on, seeing more photos. The ice cream shop one, and one you weren't anticipating. You didn't know your mom had printed and framed it. It was you and Luke the summer you were 18, both smiling at the camera with the sunset in the background as you sat on his lap in an Adirondack chair in the backyard of the Hughes' house.

The photo gave you crazy butterflies. That summer was the last time you saw Luke during the summer. Last summer you two were both at the lake at different times, you'd seen his whole family, minus him. His mom told you how he was still with his college teammates on a different Michigan lake. You had to act like you didn't really care, even though you did, so much.

Since the picture was just sitting in the dresser, not on display, you decided to take it to your room. You placed it gently on your bedside table, smiling then leaving to go down to the pool.

time, curious time. gave me no compasses, gave me no signs.

It was weird how you and Luke always seemed to be pulled together. There was some driving force between you two that was unbreakable, not even if you wanted it to. When it wasn't the summer, you lived three hours from the Hughes family, so randomly bumping into Luke was even more bizarre than anything else.

You remember when you were 15, you and your mom were picking up dinner one night at a local place and in walks Luke, Jack, and Ellen. You squealed when you saw him, running over to say hey. The boys had been in town for hockey, weirdly enough.

Interactions like that happened way more often than normal, you randomly bumped into the boy at least once every two or three months for years.

were there clues i didn't see? and isn't it just so pretty to think,

You remember when you were surprised by Luke at age 17. He came and surprised you as your prom date and you were floored. He had flowers and a corsage for you, and his tie matched your dress perfectly. Your moms thought it was the cutest thing ever, how you both blushed and giggled when near each other.

all along there was some invisible string, tying you to me?

Even though you two couldn't seem to get away from each other, neither of you ever made a move romantically. It just didn't seem realistic, you already lived hours away from each other and were going to colleges even farther, well Luke was going to the NHL but you get the point.

You guys were just best friends, always best friends. Your families knew, especially his brothers. They were your biggest fans, probably because they saw how you made their baby brother, how soft he was with you. You made him gentle, but also made him more comfortable and talkative, which Quinn and Jack loved.

ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh

Luke made you weak, and your family noticed. You could jokingly bicker with him, but when it came down to real disagreement, you never could with Luke. He just gave you those deep hazel eyes and you were melted on the floor. He was just that person for you. The one who could ask you to do anything under the sun and you'd do it for his praise.

You spent long nights with Luke, sitting in the backyard of one of your lake houses and watching the moon and stars and talking about anything. You could listen to Luke talk about property tax for hours and probably never get bored, that's how much you admired him.

bad was the blood of the song in the cab, on your first trip to L.A. you ate at my favorite spot for dinner.

You remember the weirdest instance of your bumping into each other, you were in Los Angeles with friends during the very beginning of winter break and saw Luke eating in the same restaurant as you with a couple of his friends.

You texted him, not believing what you were seeing. You asked him if he was in L.A. When he responded 'Yes just for a few days why' you were shocked. You stood and made your way across the noisy restaurant and went up to his table, where you put your hand on his shoulder and when he turned around, he was the most surprised he'd been in a long time.

You remember he jumped up, hugging you so tightly, pulling away with his jaw still dropped. You guys always told each other you had to stop meeting 'like this', but it never seemed to stop.

The next day, you two planned to branch out from your friends and meet up for lunch. You guys drove a little ways from Los Angeles, east into the country, and ate at the cutest restaurant that had a view of a lake. You two always found yourselves together by lakes.

bold was the waitress on our three year trip, getting lunches down by the lake. she said i looked like an american singer.

You remember how bold your waitress was at that restaurant, immediately boasting about how she thought you two were the cutest couple she'd ever seen. Your face was burning hot, trying not to have a breakdown in the middle of the restaurant. It got even worse when Luke didn't correct her and just said 'Thank you', instead.

That was the last time you saw Luke, you were hoping to see him very soon, though. It had been almost two weeks since the loss to the Canes, so it made sense for the boys to be arriving soon. You'd already seen Ellen and Jim a couple of nights on the back porch with your parents, but no 6'2 boys named Luke were to be seen.

time, mystical time. cutting me open then healing me fine. were there clues i didn't see?

You'd had two boyfriends in your life. One in your 8th-grade year and freshman year of high school, then one in your junior year of high school. You'd broken up with boyfriend #2 because you realized you compared him to Luke, every move he made, you compared to Luke. It made you feel terrible, but you were head over heels for another boy.

You and Luke had your senior sunrises on the same day during your senior years, and decided to skip them and drive to the lake to watch the sunrise together. Your moms were furious, but it was one of the best memories you had with him.

Your interest in each other was so painfully obvious that most of your and his family referred to you as his girl during the summer. 'Where's Luke's girl?', or 'We're just waiting for Moose's girl.' It was never when you two were in the same room, so your reactions were always priceless.

and isn't it just so pretty to think, all along there was some invisible string, tying you to me?

Your family was back from their afternoon boating escapade and you could hear them all bustling in. The second they walked in you heard your brother shout for you.

"Moosey's girl! Come down here!"

ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh

You blushed madly, getting up from your bed and walking down the stairs with an annoyed look on your face. When you got to the bottom of the stairs you could see your sister-in-law slapping your brother across the back of his head, telling him to leave you alone.

"What do you want?"

You immediately went from annoyed to overjoyed when your almost two year old niece ran over to you, shouting out your name. You picked her up, giving her a kiss on her tubby cheek, embracing her sandy and salt water ridden love.

"We're going out to dinner in like, an hour and a half? Honestly just whenever we can get that little monster bathed and dressed."

You nodded but immediately jumped to defend your little best friend.

"This thing? This baby is an angel, aren't you?"

The little girl nodded, a sassy smile on her face as she tried to say 'angel, dada.' in her slurred toddler speech.

"See?"

Your brother gave you both a look, before springing into action to grab his baby, tickling all the giggles and sqeals out of her.

You talked and played for a little longer before getting ready to go. You quickly showered and dried your hair, putting on a little linen white summer dress, and your old pair of Birkenstocks. You drove with your brother and sister-in-law on the way to dinner, sitting next to your niece in the backseat.

a string that pulled me out of all the wrong arms, right into that dive bar.

You guys were seated immediately at the restaurant, you sat between your sister-in-law and dad at the table, just close enough to talk to your favorite niece.

The restaurant was a popular spot for locals and tourists near the lake. It had a big bar in the middle and lots of tables surrounding, it was loud, but not obnoxious, and very homey. You'd probably been there over a hundred times in your life.

You were watching a random golf tournament on one of the many TVs in the bar when your brother called out your name. You looked up and the look on his face was excitement and shock.

"Look who happened to show up!"

something wrapped up all of my past mistakes, in barbed wire. chains around my demons. wool to brave the seasons.

He pointed behind him, and your eyes followed the trail to the entrance, where you saw none other than Luke Hughes standing with his family, waiting to be seated. Your jaw dropped, and a smile came over you. You saw Quinn hit Luke and then point directly at you, and when your eyes met Luke's, you could've fainted. He was in khakis and a white polo and looked so handsome.

You stood up, mumbling something to your family before practically running over to the entrance, throwing your arms around Luke.

one single thread of gold tied me to you.

"Holy shit."

Luke had his arms wrapped around you so tightly, he was so surprised to see you. He knew he would have seen you tomorrow if not tonight but he still just missed you and was shocked.

"We have gotta stop meeting like this."

You giggled when you pulled away from him, as reluctant as you were on the inside. You quickly hugged the rest of his family, not without Jack whispering, 'hey Moose's girl' to you.

You pleaded with the bar staff to push more tables together so you could sit with the Hughes, and it didn't take much convincing, seeing they'd known you since you were 6.

You sat next to Luke after the readjustment for the new tables, now sitting between him and your niece, who had all but thrown a fit about how she wanted to sit by you, not her dad, which made you laugh in his face.

At some point, you'd taken the baby from her high chair and brought her into your lap. You and Luke were both in your little world with her, she was so cute and loving. You guys didn't notice how practically the whole table stared at you with knowing eyes, they all knew, everyone except for you two.

The food came, and the baby was back in her seat. You just talked and talked and talked to Luke. You'd last seen him in December, and there was just so much to say. You'd both had tons of stuff happen to you, his NHL career, your career, everything was so exciting to tell him about.

Luke was so heavily infatuated with you, it was funny. His brothers watched as he folded for you so easily, admiring every syllable that left your mouth, nodding like a man possessed. They mumbled to each other, making fun of their baby brother's obliviousness.

cold was the steel of my axe to grind, for the boys who broke my heart. now i send their babies presents.

At some point, dinner got a little bit boring so you pulled out your phone, and what popped up was the baby registry you were buying something off of for your ex-boyfriend's pregnant wife. It was funny, how everything boiled down. Luke saw the infant clothing on your phone and gave you a questionable look.

"'S there something you're not telling me?"

You looked up at him, then back to your phone, your eyes going wide at the insinuation.

"Oh my God, Luke, no! This is for Darren's soon to be born baby, with his wife.

"Darren? Like your ex boyfriend Darren?"

You nodded, laughing and explaining the whole thing to him. You'd somehow become friends with his now wife in your freshman year of college, her junior year, and with the way the world worked for you of course she was married to your ex-boyfriend.

The rest of the night was perfect, and ended with your whole family, minus your sleeping niece, in the Hughes' backyard around the fire pit. That night you ended up right back where you were in the picture on your nightstand, right in Luke's lap in your favorite Adirondack chair.

You spent the next week with the Hughes boys, specifically your Hughes boy. You drove the boat out on the lake, wake surfed, Luke even convinced you to go golfing, not that it took him very long because you would say yes to anything he asked.

gold were the color of the leaves, when i showed you centennial park.

You sat by Luke at the end of the dock while you two watched the very cloudy sunset. There was supposed to be rain soon, but it didn't mean the sunset wasn't still pretty. Your thighs were pressed together with how close you sat to each other, giving you both warmth in your chest.

Neither of you said anything, but you both felt something when you let your head rest on his shoulder.

"This is so pretty, Lukey. I missed this with you."

It wasn't much, but it was a way to say that you loved him without saying the real words. I missed watching the sunset with you, I've always loved you.

hell was the journey, but it brought me heaven.

"I missed you."

You closed your eyes, you just wanted to be with him, didn't matter where. You could be watching a sunset on the lake or climbing a mountain, if you were with Luke you were happy.

"Think it's gonna rain soon?"

You looked up at him when you asked, your head never leaving his shoulder. He looked down for a second, before looking out at the sky.

time, wondrous time. gave me the blues and then purple-pink skies.

"Probably, but let's just stay for a few more minutes, okay?"

"Okay."

You relaxed into him further. His arm went to your back, rubbing back and forth. It could probably be pouring down rain and you wouldn't even notice, not when you had Luke with you, like this, you were Moose's girl after all.

It started sprinkling, causing you to look back at Luke, waiting to see if he reacted. He didnt, so you just stayed. Rain never hurt anybody, you'd be the last person to ruin this moment complaining about rain.

This was so strange. It felt like you were stuck in time, the gentle rain made you feel encapsulated in the moment. You sat there, staring off at the sky, the sunset was not as clear now with the thick clouds rolling in, but the colors were still there. The rain kept on passing through, the drops gaining weight and speed.

Luke didn't mind the rain, but he didn't want you to feel like he was forcing you out here, so he shifted to stand, grabbing your hand.

"C'mon, you can't get sick during summer."

You sighed, letting him pull you to your feet. He didn't let go of your hand as he turned to pull you back to your house. You don't know what came over you, but the circumstances seemed perfect, you felt like you had to tell him. You pulled him to a stop, and he turned to look with a confused face.

"What's wrong?"

You looked from him to the ground, looking at your feet, the worn dock you'd run around on summer after summer, the lake you grew up swimming with him in. This place was so full of Luke, of you and Luke.

"I, I really like you Luke. Like literally since we were 12, and I, I just.."

You trailed off, looking anywhere but those eyes.

Luke was flabbergasted. That's the only word to describe how he felt. The girl he was in love with, just said she liked him since they were little. He just stared at her, not believing what he heard.

"Are you for real?"

You would've been embarrassed, had you not heard the pure hope in his voice. You nodded, feeling your face heat up. You covered your face with your hands self-consciously. If you could look at Luke's face, you would’ve seen how he was red all from his neck to his ears.

Luke gently grabbed your hands, pulling them away from your face, and replacing them with his own. He tilted your head back so you looked at him, staring at you for just a second before pulling you in, kissing you, finally.

and it's cool, baby, with me.

Holy shit. You were freaking out, you were probably gonna be jumping up and down whenever he decided to stop kissing you. He did pull away, after a long while, when the rain started pouring. The colors of the sunset had been drowned out by the thunderclouds but you two still felt all sunny on the inside.

There was a rumble in the far distance, while you stared at him, and him back at you. You couldn't contain your excitement, you felt like running a marathon.

"Oh my God."

Your hands went back to your face, and you literally jumped. Luke laughed as you surged with happiness. He felt the same way, his smile bigger and brighter than ever before.

You grabbed his hand, tugging him back to your house quickly. You were finally under the cover of your back porch, out of harm's way. You grabbed two towels from the outside cupboards and wrapped yourselves up, you dried your feet off before running up the stairs, Luke hot on your tail.

You two got upstairs and sat on your bathroom counter while you dried off. You talked quietly, giggling an awful lot.

Once you got dry enough, you led him to your bedroom. You grabbed one of his sweatshirts you had before going to take a pair of your brother's shorts, throwing them to Luke when you got back to your room.

"Here, go change so you don't get sick."

You noticed he had more than the stuff you'd just thrown at him in his hands, he had the picture that previously sat on your night stand.

and isn't it just so pretty to think,

"I like this picture, you have to send it to me, baby."

Baby? You could've died. You nodded, mumbling out an butchered agreement, gesturing for him to leave and get dressed again.

While he was gone, you changed into some sweatpants and another one of Luke's sweatshirts, one you'd had for almost two years. When Luke came back into your room, he'd noticed your sweatshirt immediately. It was from his travel team when he was 16, and it made him so happy.

all along there was some invisible string,

You smiled at him sweetly as he walked back over to you, grabbing your face and kissing you for the second time in the last thirty minutes. You got the same butterflies you'd had living inside you since you were a little girl. This boy had been living in your head since you'd known him, and he was finally yours after you'd been his girl for so many years.

tying you to me?

You both pulled away, wrapping each other in a hug. Luke rocked you two back and forth, leaving kisses on your head.

"I love you, Moosey."

"I love you."

ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh he-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-e ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh

[hugshughes]

illicit affairs J. Hughes

Jack Hughes x fem!reader

synopsis - You were his secret, and you loved it until you realized why he really kept you one.

wc - 2.6k

contains - crying, angst, no happy ending! (not for jack x reader anyway, you know i can't leave my reader hurt by boys forever), few mentions of sex but NO SMUT AT ALL!!!! manipulation, asshole!jack, cursing, drinking. let me know!

an - ugh. this one was sad, illicit affairs always hurts but this took the cake. this was smooth to write though, it came easily. the ending may be a bit rushed, i apologize. i think jack was a good person to pick for this, not that i think he'd do this, but it was easier to make him that way than who i was gonna use for this song before. ANYWAY, hope u love as always, thank you for reading!!!

-

make sure nobody sees you leave. hood over your head, keep your eyes down.

Jack had texted you. "I'm parked at my usual spot." Said usual spot was in the dark back corner of the parking lot for the apartment building next to yours. You sighed, you felt bad. Your stomach had a deep feeling you couldn't shake.

It was almost midnight, the only time he ever wanted you. Far after the sun had gone down, so nobody could ever have the chance to see you two. The last time you saw Jack, he was gone when you woke up and you just cried and cried.

You had realized that you weren't a secret because he just liked his life private like he told you. You were a secret because he would never want to be seen with you. Not even after spending almost a year of your time on him.

He emphasized his text, and you still sat on your couch, thinking about whether or not you even wanted to see him. Your makeup was done, your hair looked beautiful, just for him to take you back to his apartment, and not act like he knew you until you were safe within the walls of his bedroom.

tell your friends you're out for a run, you'll be flushed when you return.

You thought back to the night of the last time you saw him. It was one of your closest friend's birthday party, and you were having so much fun, until Jack texted you at 10:30 pm, asking to come pick you up.

It was like he had a spell on you, like you would do whatever he asked, for the hope that he would see your devotion and decide to make your relationship serious. Because Jack wasn't your boyfriend, but he acted like it. He acted like it when he would lose a hockey game and text you, saying he missed and even loved you, saying he needed you.

take the roads less traveled by. tell yourself you can always stop.

Back to the birthday party. Jack wouldn't stop texting you, telling you he missed you so much and couldn't sleep without you. You caved in, leaving the party early, telling the birthday girl you had an early morning and needed a good night's sleep. Jack picked you up, all smiles, leaving kisses on your cheek, holding your hand.

He held your hand on the way up to your apartment, and the hope you felt was unmatched. You thought this was the moment he realized how important you were to him. But then you woke up, alone and cold, with nothing but a text saying, "Left when you fell asleep, meet up sometime next week?" It completely ruined you.

You had met Jack at a party, it was a black tie for New Year's Eve and you had immediately caught his eye. He went up to you first, you honestly hadn't even noticed him. He acted very interested in you, talking to you for hours until the clock struck midnight, and he had made you feel special. You let him have your phone number that night, and it was the flap of a butterfly's wings that created the typhoon.

what started in beautiful rooms, ends with meetings in parking lots.

As time went on, Jack started to treat you worse, he expected more from you. You knew you couldn't expect anything from him, though. He was the hotshot playboy of the NHL, and you were simply a girl. A girl he could pick and choose when he wanted because if you did something wrong, there were hundreds more lined up waiting.

and that's the thing about illicit affairs. and clandestine meetings, and longing stares. they show their truth one single time.

You could never really tell if Jack's words were genuine. He was so hot and cold with you; so much so that it was more like scalding and freezing. If you ever asked him anything near that topic, he would shut it all down immediately. He reminded you he wasn't your boyfriend, then would try to ease the sting by telling you he loved you. He was the first boy to ever tell you he loved you, and it hurt every time he did.

He was just two different people. The guy you got during the night, when he was craving someone, and the guy he really was. He didn't love you, you knew it. He knew it too. But oh how you wished he loved you. You never loved him though, how could someone love a man who only ever cared for you when there was no threat of anyone else knowing?

It was worse during the summer. He was away for almost two months then came home and expected you to come running back, then got angry when you didn't. And even after all the anger, and the red flags, and the secrecy, you couldn't stop, even though you promised yourself you could if you wanted to. You wanted to. Jack was like your drug, an addiction you couldn't get through life without.

but it dies, and it dies, and it dies, a million little times.

He was a liar. That was what you knew. You knew he couldn't love you. If you love someone, you show them, you make them feel loved. Jack never made you feel loved, he did the opposite most of the time. You remember sobbing the first time he told you he loved you because he left you alone in your bed in the middle of the night just minutes later.

leave the perfume on the shelf, that you picked out just for him. so you leave no trace behind. like you don't even exist.

You remember the time he asked you not to wear your perfume when he picked you up anymore. He said it made his car smell like you and one of his friends had asked why it smelled like perfume. He couldn't stand the thought of anyone knowing you existed with him, that much was obvious. He wanted to live a double life, one with you, and one with every single other part of his life.

He would tell you not to follow him on social media, not to tag your location in posts if he did, and not to tell your friends about it. It made you miserable, and your friends could tell something had changed in you.

take the words for what they are, a dwindling mercurial high. a drug that only worked the first few hundred times.

You knew you couldn't keep doing what you were doing with Jack. You knew he'd run you dry eventually. That he'd push you to misery and you'd have to leave him. You just held out hope that one day maybe he'd love you the way he said he did.

and that's the thing about illicit affairs. and clandestine meetings, and stolen stares.

One night he got really angry with you, and you thought you'd never see him again. With the way he treated you, you got to the point where you thought that maybe he had a girlfriend he was cheating on with you. It would've made the secrecy make sense.

You had sat him down and asked him if you were the other woman in his relationship. And he flipped on you, he was angry you thought he would ever do something like that. He shouted at you for the first time, he said things insinuating that you were sleeping around, not being "loyal" to him, and just wanted to spread your guilt to him.

It couldn't have been farther from the truth, he was the only man in your life. He was the one man you had ever let see you in the ways he saw you. The only boy you'd ever slept with. Then the next day he showed up at your apartment, a hood over his head and sunglasses covering his eyes, but nonetheless, he was holding flowers, and that's all you could focus on.

they show their truth one single time. but they lie, and they lie, and they lie, a million little times.

You snapped out of your thoughts when your phone started ringing. Jack was waiting for you, he had texted you twice now, and was currently calling you. You jumped to answer it.

"Hi."

"Hey? What are you doing? I'm here to get you."

Every word he said was like a stab to the stomach. You were past the point where his words comforted his bad actions. It all just hurt now.

"Um, sorry you came all this way. I don't think I'm feeling up to it tonight."

He scoffed pulling his phone from his ear to stare at the phone, then put it on speaker.

"What do you mean? Are you like mad at me or something? You seemed fine half an hour ago."

"Yeah um no, I mean I just don't feel great right now, and would rather not have a fast fuck at your place then get an Uber home."

You said it, you kind of couldn't believe you did. You felt proud of yourself for it. You finally called him out, even if it was just a little bit.

"Oh, so you are pissed at me? Baby, what did I do?"

Baby. It's what he called you when he wanted to get his way. You knew right now he was hoping you would just brush off your feelings and come get in his car.

and you wanna scream, don't call me "kid". don't call me "baby".

"No Jack, stop. Don't call me that. I don't-"

"What is your problem?! I didn't do anything wrong between thirty minutes ago, when you were sending me fuckin' heart emojis tellin' me you couldn't wait to see me, and now!"

You could feel the tears pricking in your eyes, the pain in your chest was overwhelming now. He just didn't understand how it felt to be cared for when it was convenient, because you always cared for him, part of you probably always would.

"I just can't do this fucking situationship we have anymore! You are ruining me, Jack. You are making me miserable, you only care about me when you feel like it, and you tell me you love me when you don't. You're making me crazy! And I just let you because I still for some stupid reason am holding out hope that one day you'll stop for a second and realize that you want me to be more than a late-night hookup when you're feeling bad about yourself!"

look at this godforsaken mess that you made me. you showed me colors, you know i can't see with anyone else.

You were sobbing, shouting at Jack through the phone. He was stunned. He was truly speechless.

"I- Shit, Angel, you know-"

"No! Stop! You do this shit, you make me feel special then you rip it out of my hands, you remind me that I'm just one of many girls who'd be forever lucky to be a doormat for you! You have made me fucking hate myself. I have never been less happy in life than I am right now, and it's because of you.

"You've forced me to create this secret life that revolves around the hope that you'll call me and tell me to walk down the street where your car is parked waiting for me in the middle of the night, just far enough so no one would ever see you."

Jack was forced to look back on all the shit he'd put you through over the past 11 months. He never really considered your feelings, not as often as he should've. He used you, he manipulated you, he made you depend on him.

"Shit, Jack. I just, I can't do it anymore. The secrets, lying to my friends, for someone who couldn't give two shits if I never saw him again. I've become someone I don't even like anymore."

don't call me "kid". don't call me "baby". look at this idiotic fool that you made me. you taught me a secret language, i can't speak with anyone else.

Jack was dumbfounded. He hadn't realized he was hurting you that bad. He hadn't thought for two seconds about how the regulations he'd put in place in your relationship would affect you. He just wanted to have someone when he needed someone, and not have to deal with the emotional turmoil that came with a committed relationship. He didn't realize you had all of that emotional turmoil on your shoulders.

Jack didn't realize it then, nor would he at this moment. But in the weeks, months, and years ahead, he would realize how important you really were to him. How much your presence really did comfort him. How lucky he was to have you. How he did love you.

"I- I'm sorry, I guess. I just, this is crazy to be honest."

You sighed, that response just confirmed everything. He never really cared, so why would he now? The second you hung up the phone he'd be able to find another girl in a matter of minutes, if he wanted to.

"It's fine, whatever. But um, yeah just lose my number Jack."

"Yeah, alright. Um, bye?"

You hung up the phone and immediately started crying again. Did he know all he had to do was fight for you? Did he know you would've stayed? He probably didn't care either way. He didn't need to fight for anyone, not when he could have someone else who didn't need any reassurance, who didn't care if he was invested in them or not, who could just be used for sex and comfort when needed and not bat an eye.

and you know damn well, for you i would ruin myself,

You felt that now you could finally breathe. The weight of him was lifted from your chest. You immediately called your best friend, telling her to come over as soon as possible, and even though it was midnight, she came. You explained how the last eleven months you'd been consistently seeing a guy who'd only wanted you in secret, and how you'd just broken it all off with him. She comforted you, and wasn't mad at you for lying, not when you'd explained it.

You started a new chapter of your life, one where you focused on your own happiness. The chapter could only last about a year though, because at a New Year's Eve party on December 31st, 2024, you met a man that one day you'd marry, have his kids, and love till death. Maybe not all relationships that begin on New Year's Eve are bad.

Jack had realized his faults and thought about them often for the next year or so after you broke everything off with him. He'd realized you were someone he should've appreciated more, and loved on more. He wished he would've changed his ways and fought for you, but was glad you were probably finally happy.

a million little times.

[hugshughes]

this is me trying L. Fantilli

Luca Fantilli x fem!reader

synopsis - You just want Luca to know that you're trying.

wc - 2.5k

contains - cursing, academic burnout (self reflection...), crying, not feeling good enough, reader has an older brother, um suggestiveness??? (reader makes one joke), that's it! LMK!

an - im so sorry i kept you guys waiting... but happy thanksgiving, forgive me im so thankful for you guys. this was a bit more self indulgent than my other fics... THIS WAS SO LATE BECAUSE i wrote 2000+ words then they didn't save and so i literally cried over it and couldn't write for the rest literal week whenever i came back to it i was upset, like i was that sad guys. and i really don't love this because it just isn't as perfect as the first one i wrote was. anyways hope you love this!

-

i've been having a hard time adjusting. i had the shiniest wheels, now they're rusting.

You were sick. Not like physical illness, go to the doctor and get medicine sick. You were sick of waking up every day, going to the same classes, eating the same food, coming home, sitting alone in your dorm, then falling asleep and doing it over again. But you couldn't afford to do anything else at the same time. If you wanted to get the grades you needed to pass your current classes, you were going to have to work your ass off.

You were always considered gifted. You took advanced classes all of high school, attending college-level courses in your junior year. Even in your freshman year at Umich, you passed with flying colors, but now, now it was different. You don't know why classes were so much harder now, and it was especially hard because everything had always been so easy.

Even with all of this, you had Luca. Luca had been your boyfriend since October of freshman year. He'd always stood by your side no matter what, but now it felt different. He'd never seen you like this, struggling so much with things you were known for being good at. You remember him telling you how proud he was when you had gotten a 98% on one of your final exams last year, you were worried he wouldn't be proud anymore.

As a child, you were conditioned into thinking that better grades meant better treatment from your parents. Your brother had been a star student always until he'd slacked off senior year and ended up going to a college he was way too smart for. When that happened, your parents decided you wouldn't be like your brother. You would go to a good school, and get good grades, and in exchange they would love you, at least that's how it felt.

i didn't know if you'd care if i came back, i have a lot of regrets about that.

All the love you'd ever known was for a price, your parents', your boyfriend's, even your brother's it was like you had to be good enough before they would consider you lovable.

You never felt this from Luca, but you never gave him a reason to think otherwise. You'd always been this smart girl for him, a girl he bragged about to his friends. The girl he could go to for help in classes.

You didn't mean to be pushing Luca away, but you were so stressed and didn't want to bring him into it.

I know I already said you weren't sick like an illness, but right now you felt gross. You were stuffy and coughing and had a pounding headache, but you had assignments due at 11:59 pm and they couldn't wait. It was 9:03 pm and it didn't look like you were gonna get any relief from class work for a while longer.

pulled the car off the road to the lookout. could've followed my fears all the way down.

You didn't even know you were crying until you saw tears fall onto your iPad screen, where you were currently writing notes for a quiz you had tomorrow. You felt completely helpless. You couldn't stop and let yourself wallow, because you had to get moving on your study guide.

You dropped your Apple Pencil and just buried your face in your hands, rubbing your eyes till you saw stars. Your pity party was interrupted by your phone ringing. Your phone was on your studying do not disturb so if someone's call was coming through it had to be Luca's.

You quickly tried to steady your breathing before swiping to answer the call.

"Hi?"

"Hey. So, what's with you totally skipping my game? You know that meant a lot to me."

Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck. How did you forget? You were the worst girlfriend ever.

"Oh my God, Luca. I'm so fucking sorry, it completely slipped my mind, oh my God, I didn't even know. I had a really long day, baby, I'm so sorry."

You were trying not to cry even more, you didn't want Luca to think you were a crybaby. Crybaby. That's what your parents called you whenever you got like this, too much for them to love.

and maybe i don't quite know what to say,

Luca just sighed, upset. He was upset with you, and you couldn't fix it. You could hear rustling on Luca's end, and another voice. All of a sudden you were seventeen getting a call from your nineteen-year-old boyfriend while he cheated on you, while another girl laid with him.

but i'm here in your doorway.

You didn't think Luca would do that to you, you really knew he wouldn't. But that one part of you was just screaming that you'd proven yourself unworthy to him, that he was done.

i just wanted you to know,

"I just, I don't even know anymore. You haven't consistently talked to me in weeks, every time we do speak you're in your head, and you keep pushing things off and forgetting. I just don't know what I'm doing wrong here."

Fuck, you couldn't stop the floodgates now. You quickly sniffed, holding the phone away from you so he wouldn't hear, soaking the cuff of your sweatshirt sleeve with tears before trying to respond.

"No, no Luc, you're not doing anything wrong. The last month has just been tough, I just don't know how to tell you. I'm trying Luca, I am, and I'm sorry. I know it doesn't fix anything and you still have every right to be angry with me, I understand why-"

this is me trying.

"Hey, it's whatever, just don't worry about it."

No. No this couldn't happen like this. He couldn't be checking out of your relationship right now. You needed him, even if you didn't know how to tell him. You accidentally let out a whimper when you tried to speak, before shakily breathing a deep breath and trying again.

"No, it isn't. I'm not being good to you. I just- Fuck Luca I'm sorry I didn't mean to forget, and I'm not meaning to be such a bad girlfriend I just, there's just,"

"Just what?"

"I don't know how to tell you! I don't want you to think differently about me Luc. You've never seen me like this."

Your trauma was truly shining through, you were terrified of Luca thinking you weren't smart.

"Are you like uninterested now? You could just tell me, not lead me on! Not just ghost me!"

"No Luca! I love you so much, I'm in love with you. I just-"

You cut yourself off, letting out a stressed sigh, rubbing your eyes when you felt the tears prick in them.

i just wanted you to know,

You didn't know what to say, it was so complicated. Every time you ever tried to talk about this with your family they shut you down, told you you were wrong for feeling like you did, and you didn't want Luca to think those things too.

"I just can't do this stuff anymore,"

"What?"

this is me trying.

"I'm just not smart anymore, and everything is so hard. And I don't know how to talk to you about it 'cause I don't want you to think I'm not smart, but I don't think I am anymore."

"Oh, baby."

Luca was stunned, his girl was going through something and he was upset with her over a hockey game. He thought you were beginning to distance yourself from him because you started to be uninterested in him. He never would've assumed you were doing it because you were scared to talk to him. He never would've assumed you were scared he would think less of you.

"Hey, it's okay. Everything's gonna be alright, okay? How about I come over? We can talk more about everything and I know I'm not the brightest guy when it comes to all of your stuff but I could try to help. That okay, pretty?"

"Yes. Please, Angel. Need you right now."

"Okay, give me a couple minutes, I'll be right there. I love you, okay?"

"I love you, Luc."

Luca let you hang up, taking a deep breath and sitting for a moment just to take in what had just happened. He had a bad feeling in his stomach now, knowing how you were hurting. He quickly recovered and got up, putting his shoes and a hat on backward before leaving his dorm.

He walked fast through campus to get to your dorm building, the cold motivating him further. When he got to your dorm building, he quickly went up the stairs, taking two at a time, and to your room. You were in a single this year, so he wasn't worried about a roommate being bothered by his presence. He knocked on the decorated door gently, bouncing on his feet waiting for you.

they told me all of my cages were mental, so i got wasted like all my potential.

Luca could've sworn he felt his heart break when he saw your face, the exhaustion mixed with sadness wearing you down. He didn't say anything before jumping to wrap his arms around you, just holding you for a minute. You clung to him so tightly, you'd missed him so badly while digging yourself into a hole of isolation.

"Hi sweet girl."

You could've started crying again. He held you gently but firmly, and it was all you ever needed. You felt yourself relax for the first time in two and a half weeks.

and my words shoot to kill when i'm mad. i have a lot of regrets about that.

"Hi Luc"

You sniffled, and Luca just melted. He pulled away from you just a little, pulling his arms away so he could cradle your faces in his palms. You brought your hands up to rest on his wrists, rubbing your thumbs back and forth.

"I missed you, pretty."

You missed him like a little kid. But it was your fault you were ever apart.

i was so ahead of the curve, the curve became a sphere.

"I missed you. 'M so sorry I isolated myself from you, I'm so fucking stressed right now. Everything is hard and it's scary 'cause it's never been hard like this for me, and I-"

fell behind all my classmates and i ended up here,

"I know baby. It is scary. College is just scary. And you are like the smartest girl I think ever so I know it's like even scarier for you when things don't make sense quickly, but it's gonna be okay. Because you have your amazing, talented, stud of a boyfriend to help you."

pouring out my heart to a stranger. but i didn't pour the whiskey.

You gave him a look, laughing for the first time in many days.

"He is pretty amazing, and talented, and hot, isn't he?"

i just wanted you to know, that this is me trying. i just wanted you to know, that this is me trying.

He nodded reassuringly, before putting his hands on your hips and pushing you back into your room, closing your door behind him.

"Damn, you just got here."

"Shut the hell up."

You laughed as you climbed up onto your bed, pulling Luca up next to you after he took his shoes off.

at least i'm trying.

"So, about this class. What do we need to learn?"

You explained how tonight you only really needed to do two things, finish a paper that was 75% done, and do another assignment that if you could figure out how to understand the concept, would be done in no time. You both snuggled close together while looking at the paper, Luca helping you through sentences you got stuck on. You finished the paper quickly, then pulled up your notes for the concept of the other assignment.

and it's hard, to be at a party when i feel like an open wound. it's hard to be anywhere these days when all i want is you.

At one point Luca took your laptop to read through the notes so you just turned over and rested your head on his chest, before seeing his gorgeous hair covered by a stupid hat grabbing it off of him, and putting it on your bedside table.

"No hats in my room."

"What? Since when?"

"Since I want to see your pretty hair, not the maize and blue hat I see every other day."

Luca just laughed, shaking his head and running his non-scrolling hand down your back. Luca somehow understood the concept and reiterated it to you in a way that made everything click. He was your good luck charm, you knew it. Everything made sense with him.

you're a flashback, in a film reel, on the one screen in my town.

You made him lay on your chest with your laptop resting on his back while you completed the assignment. One hand was in his hair while the other was gliding across the keyboard. You finished it in 20 minutes. And your chest felt so much lighter after you hit the submit button.

You closed your laptop, sliding it onto the floor before putting both of your hands into Luca's hair.

"I knew you could do it, baby. You just needed someone to tell you that."

"I love you."

"I love you so much."

Luca's arms around your middle tightened, and he moved his head to look up at you.

"I know you feel like you have to be this perfect person, baby, but I need you to know you don't have to do that for anyone, especially me. Because you are everything, and I can't take care of you if you're scared to talk to me about how you're feeling. I know your parents and other people make you feel like if you don't do good at school they will love you less, but you need to know that you could flunk out of school, and you would still be the most important person to me, okay?"

i just wanted you to know, that this is me trying.

You were crying. You pulled him somehow closer and hugged him so tight, pulling away after over a minute to give him a good long kiss that expressed your gratitude. Because you were, so fucking grateful. This boy had seen all of it, and still chose you, and would continue to choose you until his last breath.

(and maybe i don't quite know what to say,)

"Thank you, Angel. You don't know how much hearing that means to me. I love you, so so much."

"You're everything. I see that you're trying, and that is always gonna be enough."

i just wanted you to know, that this is me trying. at least i'm trying.

[hugshughes]

seven E. Edwards

Ethan Edwards x fem!reader

synopsis - you and Ethan, your best friend since you were seven, finally admit you're in love with each other.

wc - 5.7k :O

contains - so much fluff LORDDDDDDDD. curse words, eating/drinking, kissing, making out, reader has long enough hair for a braided ponytail, a little suggestiveness (twenty year old boy has dirty thoughts about his best friend sigh), underage drinking. oh reader has a late summer birthday (end of July-August), and two older brothers sorryyyyy. LMK!!!!

an - EDIT - that one paragraph that was in first person... why didn't u guys tell me. are we even friends anymore???? unedited. i'll do it tomorrow i promise. hey guys.... sorry it's been like almost 3 weeks, I love you I swear. there were midterms then halloweek so like I had to be studious then I had to be slutty so it was a long two weeks. also i wanna be fr friends with more fic writers on here yall r so cute. ANYWAY THIS WAS PROBABLY MY FAV SO FAR. i am an ethan girl to my core and it shows in this. people keep requesting behind my back pt.2 and i promise it's coming guys im just grinding this celebration then i'll be doing other stuff! may or may not have given Ethan and reader the same costume me and my man wore this weekend🤭. ANYWAYS ENJOYYYYYYYY!

-

please picture me in the trees. i hit my peak at seven. feet in the swing over the creek.

Lake Moraine, Alberta, Canada. Summer, 2009

You were freshly seven years old as you ran around the backyard of your family's summer house with your best friend, Ethan. It was the first summer you ever spent with the Edwards family, but it was perfect.

Your parents got along great, you both had older brothers who quickly became good friends. And you got your best friend for 3 whole weeks to ride on the boat, play tag, swim, make s'mores, and do anything else you wanted to with.

Your moms loved joking about how you two were destined to be married from the beginning. They saw the way Ethan was completely mesmerized by you even as a seven-year-old boy. He followed you around like a puppy and did everything he could for you. You wanted to play hide 'n seek? He was already counting to 40. You got scared of the summer fireworks? He held your hand and convinced you they were exciting and fun.

Your moms also saw the way you were obsessed with him. It was always 'Where's Ethan?', or 'Is Ethan awake yet?' all summer long. You didn't go anywhere without him. You pouted like crazy whenever he would go to play street hockey in the driveway with the older boys while you sat on the porch with your parents.

i was too scared to jump in. but i, i was high in the sky, with pennsylvania under me.

That summer was something you thought of often, it was perfection. Running around playing with your best friend all summer as a seven-year-old was the best thing you could've ever asked for.

When you guys were double your previous age, fourteen years old, you were still as close as ever. You went through it all together. The summer of 2016 was the summer when Ethan realized he had a crush on you. It was also, the summer you got boobs, but the two things were only semi-related.

Ethan found himself being insanely flustered by you and everything you did. When your hand brushed his while walking down the dock to the boat, when you kissed him on the cheek after he'd given you your birthday present, a silver necklace with a small solid heart pendant. It was a necklace you still wore today.

It wasn't until the next summer though that you realized you were heavily infatuated with the brunette. Something about him had changed, instead of him being this seven-year-old boy in your mind, he was fifteen, he had gotten muscles, and his hair was shaggy, and your hormones went crazy over it.

You and Ethan had a lot of fun that summer, you drank for the first time, which both of you ended up throwing up from in the backyard while your parents and siblings slept. Ethan had broken your heart for the first time the next year. He left the summer house 2 weeks early to go to a camp his new girlfriend begged him to go to. And him leaving 2 weeks early had him leaving days before your birthday, which hurt the worst.

You broke his heart even worse the next year when you brought your new boyfriend to the house. The house he fell in love with you in, the house you fell for him in. He hated that summer, he and the girl from the summer before had only lasted until the fall of that year, and Ethan realized he really was in love with you. But then your family drove up and you got out of the car with him, the guy that Ethan immediately made his enemy.

That summer was okay for you, and it sucked for Ethan. Your boyfriend left you unimpressed that summer, he wasn't the most polite guy, and was very much uninterested in the fun stuff you loved doing every summer. You remember how he went to sleep and left you alone watching the fireworks you had grown to love so much. You broke up with him over text the day you got back home. You weren't heartbroken after that, not like you were the summer before.

Neither of you had gotten into relationships since then. You'd both been too consumed by each other, you both knew no one else would fulfill you like the other would.

And so you were best friends, you hung out whenever you could, you went to all of his games, you went to proms and homecomings together, as friends. When Ethan committed to the University of Michigan, it became a school you were obsessed with getting into. Your application and essay had the most detail and took you the longest. You remember when you got an email in your inbox from the umich admissions office.

are there still beautiful things?

You couldn't open it. Not without Ethan. You grabbed your phone and moved your laptop off your lap and back onto your desk. You called him, your leg bouncing anxiously as it rang. He picked up after five rings.

"Hey Angel,"

Angel. He'd called you it since when you broke up with your first boyfriend, he told you that you were an angel and that guy didn't deserve you. And then it just stuck with him.

"My response for umich is here. Can you come over? I don't think I can open it without you here."

"Fuck yeah, give me like ten minutes."

You let out a deep breath, you were scared. You didn't think you would get in. You had the grades for it, and the extracurriculars, but you just had a pit in your stomach over it.

"It's gonna be okay Angel, alright? You're getting in. I love you, I'll be there in a little."

"Okay, I love you."

He hung up, you sat anxious at your desk, before closing your laptop and moving to sit on your bed. You heard his car pull in, the black jeep that brought you two to school every day, the jeep that drove you guys to the drive-in movies once every month, the jeep that you two drove to the lake last summer.

Your brother let him in, you heard him take his shoes off and run up the stairs, taking two at a time. He opened your door, smiling big at you before closing it behind him. You couldn't even smile at him, you felt like you were gonna be sick.

"Don't look at me like that. You need to stop acting like you won't get in."

"You don't know that though, Ethe. Tons of kids wanna go to Michigan, and tons of kids aren't gonna get in."

"Well we don't care about those kids, do we? 'Cause you aren't them, you're you, and you're perfect."

You just stared at him, you couldn't do anything else. All you wanted to do was kiss him, but again, you couldn't do that.

"Now where's this acceptance email at?"

You pointed to your closed laptop. He grinned and turned to grab it, climbing over you with his free hand to get onto your bed. He opened your laptop, typing in your password, and seeing the email at the top of your inbox. He turned and looked at you, his hand finding yours.

"You know it's gonna be okay no matter what, right? Even if you don't get in, which you will, but even if you don't that won't change anything. You'll go to Iowa and you'll love it."

You took a deep breath and nodded, squeezing his hand. You nodded towards your laptop, gesturing for him to click the email. You lean your head on his shoulder, heart racing as he moves your mouse to the email. He clicks the email, then the link included in it. He reads a sentence under his breath before stopping. You weren't reading it, you had your eyes closed. Ethan jumps, shouting and burying you in a hug, resulting in your laptop falling off your bed.

"You did it! We're going to Michigan together!"

You just hugged him so tight. You were so thankful for the admissions officer who had read your essay, which may have included Ethan's name a few times. Not because he was going for hockey, but because he was your best friend. You two both hugged for a moment, before running downstairs to tell your family.

sweet tea in the summer, cross your heart won't tell no other.

That was one of your favorite memories with Ethan. Now it was over three years later, you guys were juniors in college and you were still just best friends.

Tonight was the first night of Halloweekend, as you call it. You had a duo costume with Ethan, you were a referee and he was a hockey player. It was basic, you both knew that, but it was fun, and Ethan had no problem with how good you looked in your black little Lululemon skirt when you had tried your costume on for him. You guys had barely any time to get ready because of the game against Lindenwood earlier in the day. You were both getting ready in your apartment, so you could go to the party together.

You had only had your skirt and black sports bra on when Ethan knocked on your door, calling your name to let him in. You ran over to the door, excited to see Ethan and congratulate him on the huge win. When you opened the door Ethan's heart jumped, the sight of you in your incomplete outfit made his teenage boy hormones go crazy.

"Hi Ethe! I see you aren't ready yet."

You gave him an annoyed look, because he said he would be dressed when he got to yours.

"Well you aren't exactly in your full outfit either."

You blushed when you really realized you hadn't even thought about not having your shirt on when getting the door. You waved your hand and quickly turned away from the brunette, going back to your room, Ethan hot on your heels.

You quickly grabbed your shirt and sat back at your vanity, pulling it over your head and tucking it with your skirt letting it sag out a little bit. You quickly did your makeup, while Ethan sat on your bed and watched his phone.

"Ethe, if you don't start getting ready I will literally hurt you."

He looked up and let out a wannabe innocent gasp, claiming he "literally doesn't have to do anything but change his shirt". You shout at him again and he calls you by your mother's name, to which you gasped and threw your eyelash curler at him.

He finally gave in and started getting ready. Your eyes were practically stuck to him when you watched him pull his t-shirt off, his toned upper body on full display in your mirror. Your pupils were dilating while you stared at him.

Ethan wore his own navy Michigan jersey over a white sweatshirt, it was basic but he was happy he didn't have to do much. He laid back down on your bed once he was finished and watched as you put your hair back.

You'd gotten your hair in the ponytail, but you'd done the braid multiple times and it still just didn't look right. You sighed then looked at Ethan in the mirror, finding him already staring at you, then asked him the big question.

"Ethey, baby, can you please braid my hair?"

Baby. You'd called Ethan baby and he couldn't handle it. He quickly nodded, stuttering out a yes and jumping up from your bed to stand behind you at your vanity. He quickly separated your hair into three, looking at you for approval, like you hadn't taught him to braid your hair at 11 years old.

and though i can't recall your face, i still got love for you.

You smiled at him and slightly nodded, not shaking your head too much. He smiled a little bit back at you but was too focused on twisting your hair into itself to look in your eyes.

"Hair tie."

You smiled to yourself when he mumbled it to you, so incredibly focused on his work in your hair. Like it was the most detrimental thing he'd had to do today, like he hadn't played a big hockey game hours earlier.

"And... You're perfect."

He mumbled this as he tied off your braid, turning your head to show you in the mirror. You smiled at him grabbing his hand behind your back and rubbing your thumb over his, thanking him physically, since it was his love language.

your braids like a pattern, love you to the Moon, and to Saturn.

You stood from your vanity, sliding your sneakers on and grabbing your whistle to hang around your neck. You and Ethan both went out of your room and stood in front of the large mirror you had set up in the hallway. You deemed it time to take photos, but not before you unzipped the quarter-zip of your top so you could see your cleavage on pretty full display. The second you did so Ethan knew he was done for the night.

You guys took some photos and then you guys started walking to the party because it was only a six-minute walk from your place. When you arrived at the party, you guys were immediately pulled into a group of hockey players.

Ethan went to get you both drinks once he knew you were safe with his friends. You stood between Luca and Mark as you watched Ethan head off into the crowd.

"So, when are you two gonna admit you wanna fuck?"

Your eyes bulged out of your head. You turned and slapped Mark's chest, hard. He snickered along with the other boys around you.

"One, there's freshie ears around us, and two, we are never gonna do that, so shut the actual fuck up."

Mark shook his head, another laugh leaving his mouth as he pointed at Ethan, who was talking to one of his friends on the way back to your group.

"That kid is obsessed with you. Don't you think it's weird he literally hasn't gotten a girl yet, when he's got hundreds of girls here that would drop dead if he even said a word to them? He only likes you."

It was your turn to laugh, you knew that couldn't be true. You looked at Mark and rolled your eyes, it was honestly irritating hearing him say stuff like that at this point.

"Please, Mark. No chance. He's been my best friend since I was seven, if he liked me, he would've said so by now.

"Well you've liked him for forever and you haven't said anything, have you?"

You couldn't respond because Ethan was back, handing you a can of something. You thanked him and rubbed his hand, like always. He always received physical touch the best, especially as a thank you, it was funny to you because it was so incredibly similar to the golden retriever all of his fans called him online.

passed down like folk songs, the love lasts so long.

You didn't stray far from Ethan for the first hour and a half, watching Rutger and Luca demolish in pong for a while. Then you saw some girls from your classes who you loved so you went to say hey to them and ended up talking for awhile.

After a little bit you and one of the girls you were with both had empty drinks so y'all got up to head to the kitchen.

"Oh my God babe, I saw your Insta story of you and your man, y'all are so hot together, and your costume is top tier."

You laughed at her, blushing madly.

"He's not my man! He's just my best friend, but thank you I picked our costume out."

She gasped at you, stopping abruptly.

"No way he isn't your man! He looks at you like he wants to tear your clothes off every fucking second!"

"Shut up! No he doesn't! He does not like me like that."

You both turned the corner laughing and you almost halted in your steps when you realized what you were seeing. It was Ethan, standing and laughing with this one bitch you knew, her name was like Diana or something. She had her hand on his chest as her head flew back at one of his jokes. All you knew is you'd seen her try to talk to all of the hockey players at parties since your freshman year, even though most of them were 3+ years younger than her because she was a grad student and at least 25. Then you realized what she was wearing, she was dressed as the fucking Stanley Cup. You wanted to die.

"See, not my man."

and i've been meaning to tell you, i think your house is haunted. your dad is always mad and that must be why.

Your voice got quieter as you said it, your stomach now had a pit and your eyes looked so disappointed. You don't know why you let Mark's word get to your head, because obviously there was never gonna be anything between the two of you. You left and told Bri you were going to the bathroom, trying to find an empty one.

Ethan saw as you quickly turned into the kitchen, disappearing into the crowd with your friend. He'd also seen the terrible look on your face. He was immediately worried, not even thinking for half a second about the, in his opinion, annoying fake blonde, practically pawing at him, that he ended up being intercepted by on his way to find you.

He quickly tried to follow you but was stopped by a firm grip on his wrist. He pulled his hand from her grasp roughly and gave her a bewildered look.

"Wait Ethey! Where are you going? I wanna take a picture with you, we're matching so cute!"

He didn't even look at her, trying to find the back of your head in the crowd.

"No, don't call me that."

"Ugh, okay Ethan. Well, come here let me take a picture of our matching costumes."

"No thanks I'm already matching with my girl, and we're not even matching. A college player wouldn't have a Stanley Cup, doesn't even make sense"

He mumbled it to her, still pushing away from her as he finally got her to get her hands off of him. He immediately pushed into the crowd of the kitchen, desperately looking for you. He finally spotted the black and white stripes of your shirt and the braid he had done swerving in between people. He followed you, knowing calling your name would do nothing in the loud house. He watched you walk into the bathroom of probably the only empty hallway of the house, and he waited outside the door for almost 10 minutes before knocking.

"Sorry! I'll be out in just a second."

Your voice sounded dull, he was definitely worried about you.

"No it's just me, just wanted to know if you were okay. Are you?"

"Oh Ethe,"

You opened the door from your spot sitting on the counter, letting him walk in.

"hey, sorry didn't mean for you to be worried about me."

You tried to smile at him, but he could tell something was wrong. He sat by you on the counter, your thighs pressed against each other as he looked at you, concern filling his face. You wouldn't look at him, your face would give it all away if you did, and you knew it.

i think you should come live with me, and we can be pirates.

"I can tell something's off. What is it? Did someone say somethin' to you?"

You laughed a little, and it confused him even further.

"You'd be surprised at what's got me upset. It's stupid anyway so don't worry your pretty little head, alright?"

Ethan planted his hand on your knee firmly, urging you to look at him with a 'Hey.' You looked up at him for a few seconds before looking around the dim bathroom to distract yourself.

"Just tell me, Angel. Nothing you say is stupid to me."

Of course, he pulled out the Angel card, he knew you would do whatever he asked if he called you Angel. You looked up at him with an unamused face raising your eyebrows for a second before sighing, looking anywhere but his brown eyes.

then you won't have to cry,

"Mark was just saying stuff earlier and then-"

"What did he say? Did he make you upset? I know he's my teammate but I don't care I'll-"

"Ethan Edwards! No, Mark didn't make me upset. It's different than that, it's a whole big thing, and I just don't know how to talk to you about it."

Ethan thought the worst immediately. Well, it probably wasn't the actual worst, but it was the worst thing that could've happened to him.

"Does Mark like you? Did he tell you that?"

Your eyes went wide, and you could've laughed at Ethan's obliviousness.

"No, Ethe. That is definitely not what he said."

He looked at you helplessly, he was so confused. He didn't know how to do the one thing he wanted to, comfort you. He sighed shrugging and shaking his head, he was getting irritable. He stood up from the counter, exasperated.

"Then what is it? Why are you so upset? Can you just please tell me Angel? We tell each other everything baby."

You were gonna scream, he called you baby. He called you baby and you were about to tell him you were head over heels in love with him. You took a deep breath, looking away from where he'd stationed himself directly in front of you, hands on either side of your thighs as he leaned close to you, still worried.

or hide in the closet.

"I just, I'm like, Ethan you're my best friend and I know it's terrible of me to do this but I really fucking love you, like more than that like I'm in love with you and I know I'm a horrible best friend-"

Ethan cut you off by kissing you. Ethan Edwards was kissing you. Ethan Edwards had his hands cupping your jaw, was tilting his head, and kissing you. You were stunned, you didn't kiss him back for a few seconds out of pure shock, and then you realized what was happening. Your hands were gripping his wrists as he held your face. Your legs opened so he could step in between them to be closer to you. His hands moved from your face to your hips as yours went to his neck when you deepened the kiss, it turning into a full-on makeout.

You pulled away, heavy breathing as you stared at Ethan, eyes wide and exasperated.

and just like a folk song,

"That was fuckin' great, Goddamn."

You closed your eyes and let your head fall to Ethan's chest when he said that, laughing at his stupidity. His arms quickly wrapped you into a hug, squeezing you tightly as he laid a kiss on your exposed neck.

"I love you 'like that' too if it wasn't clear before."

our love will be passed on.

"Really? I didn't notice."

He poked your sides at your sass, laughing as you wiggled and squirmed in his grip. Ethan then had a thought come to his head that peaked his curiosity.

"Wait, if that's what you were all stuck on then why were you so upset?"

You brought your arms down from their place around his neck, ready to talk through your annoyance with your hands.

"Ethey, seriously? I was walking with Bri and she was literally telling me we look like a hot couple and that you look at me like you wanted to tear my clothes off and then we turn the corner and I see you with that mega bitch with her hands all over you, acting like you're a fucking comedian."

please picture me, in the weeds. before i learned civility.

His eyes widened at your confession, his cheeks were dusted red when you told him about how Bri thinks he looks at you. He started laughing as you let your green monster out over the girl he didn't even know’s name.

i used to scream ferociously, any time i wanted.

"Angel, that got you all upset? That is crazy because that girl was the most uninteresting, fake, batshit person I've ever had to speak to. She kept trying to say that me and her were matching but we literally aren't, 'cause like why would a college player have a Stanley Cup? Doesn't make any sense. But, I told her I was already matching with my girl anyways, so."

"Your girl?"

You raised your eyebrows at him faking ignorance. He rolled his eyes at you and shook his head, his large warm hands rubbing back and forth over your hips and thighs.

"Well, now you're officially my girl. But baby, you've always been my girl, c'mon now."

i, i.

Your face was so hot and you literally couldn't even speak. You opened your mouth to speak but promptly closed it sucking in a deep breath. Your heartbeat was so fast. That was the sexiest thing you'd ever heard anyone say, and it had an effect on you.

You couldn't look into his eyes anymore, the mix between what he'd just said and the feeling of his hands rubbing over the tops of your thighs, sometimes 'accidentally' hitting the hem of your little skirt was too much. You hid your head in his neck while he smiled so big, it was almost annoying.

"Christ, Ethan."

"What baby? What's got you all hot 'n bothered?"

"Shut the actual fuck up."

He was laughing, hard, which made you blush even more. You pulled your head from his neck and brought your arms around his shoulders to kiss him again, a little bit needier than the first one. His hands stopped their movements, their placement underneath the edges of your skirt making you go crazy.

"Fuck, you're perfect Angel."

His words went straight to the pit forming in your stomach. You moaned into his mouth in response, and Ethan promised himself he would do whatever he had to do to make you make that noise again. Ethan was two seconds from pulling your shirt off of you when there was a bang on the door, causing you to jump, squeezing around Ethan's shoulders.

"Hun, are you alright? You've been in there awhile!"

It was Bri, you let out a sigh of relief, loosening your grip on Ethan and nudging him to the side, sliding off of the bathroom counter.

"Um, yeah I'm alright! Uh I'll be out in a sec!"

"Kay-kay!"

You turned around and gave Ethan a wide-eyed look, while he laughed at you. You turned from him and looked into the mirror, flattening your baby hairs and straightening out your outfit. You gave Ethan a 'you ready?' look to which he nodded and you unlocked and opened the door, halting when you saw Bri standing near the door waiting for you. Ethan bumped into you at your abrupt stop and when Bri looked up and saw two of you, she squealed.

"Oh em gee! Girl, I knew it!"

sweet tea in the summer, cross my heart won't tell no other.

She ran away from you two back to the house, most likely to tell your girlfriends. You two giggled at her and then turned to walk back into the party.

Ethan pressed his hand against your lower back as he guided you through the crowd and back to the group of hockey players now in a different spot than you remember. When Mark noticed you two, when he noticed Ethan's hand, he immediately lit up smiling.

"Hey guys, long time no see, huh?"

and though i can't recall your face, i still got love for you.

You immediately went red as Ethan smirked annoyingly. You both sat down next to each other, Ethan's hand lingering on your thigh while you guys conversed with your friends for another half hour or so.

Eventually, Ethan was getting bored and wanted you all to himself again. He leaned over and layed his head on your shoulder, whispering in your ear.

"You wanna head out baby?"

You turned to look at him, nodding and wrapping your hand in his. Ethan stood up first, pulling you up with him.

"I think we're gonna head out. I'll see you guys tomorrow, alright?"

The guys nodded, bidding you guys goodbyes and waving. Mark shouts an extra loud goodbye to you, teasing you about your conversation earlier, to which you stuck up your middle finger to him behind Ethan's back.

Once you guys stepped outside you immediately started shivering, dropping Ethan's hand to rub your hands over your arms. You were cursing yourself 3 hours ago for not taking a jacket. You didn't even think about the fact that it would probably be almost freezing when you left the party, and your referee shirt and little skirt weren't helping at all.

Obviously Ethan noticed, he always did. He immediately started stripping on the front porch of the house, and you were bewildered.

"Ethan! What the fuck are you doing?"

He was shirtless on the street, he tossed you his hoodie before putting his jersey back on, smiling at you.

"Gotta keep my girl warm."

pack your doll and a sweater, we'll move to India forever.

You gratefully put the warm sweatshirt on, snuggling up into the soft material. Then, you snuggled up into the side of your boyfriend. Your boyfriend. Seven-year-old you wouldn't believe you, she'd be so confused. Fourteen-year-old you wouldn't believe it either, saying you never had feelings for Ethan, he was just your best friend. But sixteen-year-old you? Well she would be squealing and kicking her feet because you were dating him, the only boy you'd ever really liked, loved. The one boy that made you happy. He was so perfect, and you'd known he was perfect since you were seven.

passed down like folk songs, our love lasts so long.

[hugshughes]

mirrorball M. Estapa

Mark Estapa x fem!reader

synopsis - You realize Mark Estapa is the one person you don't have to perform for.

wc - 4.8k (#proud)

contains - cursing, slight miscommunication, upset reader, frustrated reader, fluff asf, kissing, cuddling. as always lmk!

an - LIGHTLY EDITED!!! sorry if there's any mistakes! THIS ONE WAS FUNNNNNN. i love mark so much so this was cute. it does take a long time to get to the point though so.. sorry! this song is also everything to me so yeah! oh also, betty love interest has been determined!!!! connor bedard is like honestly the perfect guy for it i feel like, cause he's young and stuff. and JH86 already has illicit affairs sooooo don't be mad at me! i hope you LOVE this! as always reblogs and replies are very much appreciated!

-

i want you to know, i'm a mirrorball. i'll show you every version of yourself tonight.

You'd always been somewhat of a people pleaser. Your happiness had almost always stemmed from whether or not the people around you were happy. It started when you were little, because of how your parents would praise you when you'd take care of your 3 little siblings for them.

Your parents were always working, trying to make enough so that your family could live comfortably, but it had you parenting your siblings for all of your childhood. All of your nurturing at home caused you to do that to everyone you cared about. Always being called the "mom of the friend group." You would do anything you could for people around you to be happy with you, no matter if it meant you were miserable or not.

Now that you were in college, you felt weird not having someone depend on you every second like you do back at home. You had a lot of friends in school now, and lots of people liked that you would never say no to them, taking advantage of your kindness.

You'd met Ethan Edwards in a business class freshman year and he immediately took you in and brought you everywhere. He thought you were cool and fun and one of the few girls he could be friends with that didn't make it weird because of his "status" on the campus. He'd brought you to a hockey house party sophomore year and it's where you met Mark Estapa.

i'll get you out on the floor, shimmering beautiful. and when i break, it's in a million pieces.

Mark had been enthralled by you when you met. Your caring nature and kindness absolutely melted him. He watched you be the designated driver everywhere you went, take care of all of your girlfriends when they got plastered, and in his opinion, let them walk all over you. See, he loved your caring nature, to an extent. He loved how sweet you are, but he hated how other people took such an advantage of it. Once he'd even told your friend to fuck off when he'd seen her trying to make you feel bad for something that was completely on her.

hush, when no one is around my dear. you'll find me on my tallest tiptoes, spinnin' in my, highest heels, love. shinin' just for you.

While Mark loved how nurturing you were, he loved even more when you weren't so tense, and taking care of everyone, and you were just carefree. The first time he'd ever seen you like this was in February of your sophomore year, six months after he met you. You guys were at a party, that was really a "hangout" but while you guys drank, where none of those friends of yours had been invited. He'd never seen you that happy.

You were sitting right by him on the couch, your Ugg slippers on the rug in front of you while you tucked your legs into your chest, a drink in your hand. You were laughing and making jokes, not having to stress over whether your "friends" were about to get drugged because they would just grab drinks from anyone offering.

You'd always admired Mark. Since the night you met him, you just loved everything he did. How gentle he was even though his hockey stats would say otherwise. You loved how he always seemed to have a smile on his face, and how much he cared for you. He was one of the first people ever who cared for you the way you cared for everyone else.

hush, i know they said the end is near. but i'm still on my tallest tiptoes, spinnin' in my highest heels, love. shinin' just for you.

You had been in love with him since June. Your friend group had gotten together in the summer and spent a weekend on a lake in Michigan, near where Mark's parents lived. One night his parents had invited your group to his childhood home to have dinner and when you'd seen his interactions with his parents, you were a puddle. He was the sweetest guy you'd ever met, but you were convinced you couldn't have him. And he thought the same things about you, sadly enough.

Unknowingly to you, Mark had fallen in complete love with you the same exact day. When he watched you help his mom out with dinner then again afterwards with dishes his heart pounded. Ethan was teasing him all night. Ethan had done everything but tell you guys that you liked the other to try to get you together, sending you two out on drives to get something for a party, making you two a team during every game on the PlayStation, encouraging you guys to enroll in the same classes for junior year, and more.

You hadn't seen Mark all summer after the trip in late June, you'd texted a lot though. He'd even called you a couple of times, which always made you scared because no one had ever just called you to talk to you like he did.

No matter how much Ethan pressured you to tell Mark how you felt, you were always too scared. You'd only ever had two boyfriends before, and they were not good guys, so you didn't really know what it felt like when a guy really loved you.

It was two weeks into the school year and you still hadn't seen Ethan or Mark yet. You were lying in your bed with your eyes closed after class when your phone rang, you jumped, grabbing your phone, seeing 'Mark Estapa🤍" at the top of your screen. You tensed for a second, sliding your finger across your screen to answer and hitting the speaker button.

"Hello?"

Mark smiled when he heard your voice, blush dusting the tips of his ears.

"Hey! What's up? Do you have plans for tonight?"

"No, should I? Is there an Alpha Phi party Ethe didn't tell me about?"

You sat up in your bed, rubbing your eyes and flattening your hair.

"No, no party. I wanted to ask if you maybe want to go get dinner or something, maybe we could go walk around target or something."

You blushed at his proposal, you knew it was just a hangout, but dinner with Mark was like, all you ever wanted. You accepted gently, not trying to sound desperate to see him.

"Okay, great. Can I come pick you up in like 20?"

You accepted again, quickly saying goodbye and texting Mark your new address so you could get ready. You'd just moved off campus and into an apartment for your junior year. It was 50° and felt like 45° in Ann Arbor, perfect fall weather, so you made sure to wear warm clothes.

You slipped on your Ugg slippers right when Mark knocked on your door. You opened the door with a big smile, Mark's face adorned by his usual grin.

"Hi Mark, oh my gosh I haven't seen you in forever!"

You were gonna use that as your excuse to hug him. He greeted you sweetly, squeezing you tightly. When you both pulled away from each other you admired his face, his rosy cheeks from the cold weather, how comfy and warm he looked in his big Wolverine Hockey sweatshirt, everything.

You guys exited your apartment building silently, when you got to Mark's car he went up ahead of you and opened the door for you. You looked up at him and smiled sweetly.

"My hero."

He nodded and laughed, making sure you were securely in the car before closing your door, running around the front of the car to get in. You turned on your seat warmer while he buckled up, he looked over at you and smiled again, and you raised your eyebrows at him, silently asking him 'what??' he just laughed and shook his head.

You plugged your phone into the car so you could play music, Mark didn't fight you over it, he never did. He loved watching you lip-sync to the music you loved, even though you didn't think he saw you. He smiled as he glanced over to you while stopped at a red light, the red illuminating your face as you sang silently along with Bad Habit by Steve Lacy. He thought the song choice was funny because he literally did wish you knew he wanted you.

This was the you that he loved, the girl who wasn't constantly stressed over people who didn't deserve even half a second of her attention. He snapped out of his trance on you when the light on your face turned green. He drove to your guys' favorite place to eat fast.

You were quickly texting your mom back when you pulled up to the restaurant. Mark hopped out of the car with haste and got around the car before you could get your seatbelt off, opening your door for you, holding out a hand so you could balance.

Your cheeks warmed as you accepted his hand, letting him help pull you out of his warm car, and into the cold of Ann Arbor. You both ran across the parking lot to get away from the cold, Mark running around you once you'd crossed the street so he could open the door for you. He was the sweetest guy you'd ever met. You guys greeted the staff that knew you two well as the "friends" that come in every week together.

Your favorite waitress brought you to your usual booth, taking your drink orders then taking off. Said waitress was the same woman that always would tell you and Mark that you guys were perfect for each other when one of you was in the bathroom and the other was left at the table. You and Mark had both sat on the same side of the booth always, you guys just liked it better that way, and it was always both of yours' side when you came with other people.

Taylor Swift was playing lowly through the restaurant while you guys pretended to look through the menus, acting like you didn't get the same thing every time.

After you guys ordered, you started talking about summer, and what you guys had done since June 27th, when you'd seen each other last. You told Mark how you spent July with your family and then August with your friends in Miami.

i want you to know, i'm a mirrorball. i'll can change everything, about me to fit in.

"-but you know partying is never that fun with that group of girls because I always am the DD and they all always get absolutely blackout plastered and none of them are good drunks and it just-"

"You know I hate when you do that?"

You halted, staring at him with furrowed eyebrows. You were shocked, did you make Mark upset? You didn't think you'd said anything bad. You couldn't even get a 'what?' in before Mark started again.

"When you let those girls walk all over you. You don't deserve to go out with them just to take care of them while they do whatever they want all night. It just makes me like sad to see you literally hate every time you go out with them. You don't always have to take care of everyone. You can let people do things for you, and let people do things for themselves, okay? You can do something for yourself for once."

you are not like the regulars. the masquerade revelers. drunk as they watch my shattered edges glisten.

You were stunned. You'd never had anyone care about you like that before, you'd always felt like you had to let everyone depend on you since you were so little. You'd never had a Mark before. Someone who'd let you be you, someone who wouldn't let you go out of your way and hurt yourself to make sure other people are happy.

You didn't know what to say, you hugged him, though. You hugged him tighter than you ever had. And he held you so gently as if you would break. You didn't even know you were tearing up until your vision clouded over.

"Thank you, Mark. I just- I've been taking care of everyone around me since I can even remember. My little brothers and sister were always my responsibility when I was little and it just stuck and now I feel bad if I don't do anything I can to make the people I love happy. But thank you, um wow yeah thank you, Mark."

You both pulled away, he nodded with a straight face. You quickly wiped under your eyes and turned back to the table, you didn't know what to do now.

"Sorry if I just like, made that awkward, but I just really care about you and I don't like when you're with those girls 'cause they don't make you happy."

I love you. I love you. I love you.

That's what Mark wishes he could say.

hush, when no one is around my dear. you'll find me on my tallest tiptoes, spinnin' in my, highest heels, love. shinin' just for you.

"You didn't, it's not awkward Mark."

You giggled and shook your head at him, asking him how his summer went in turn. He went on about all his plans and it just mesmerized you. The way he talked was everything to you, how excited he got over little things, how enthusiastic he was about almost everything. You loved how bright he was while also being able to understand you and be serious.

You guys got your food and ate while talking about more random things. Mark got up and went to the bathroom right after you both finished, while you sat and waited on him and the check. Mark walked back from the bathroom minutes later and when he got to the booth he held out his hand to help you out of it.

"Mark the check didn't come yet. We can't leave."

He smile got bigger, you could already tell what he was about to say.

"Well I just paid so I think we're fine."

You rolled your eyes at him, lightly pushing him after you accepted his help out of the booth, telling him you’re paying him back somehow. When you got into the car you checked the time, 8:13 p.m. Target closed at 10, so you decided to drive over to it and check it out.

hush, i know they said the end is near. but i'm still on my tallest tiptoes, spinnin' in my highest heels, love. shinin' just for you.

You played more music in the car, and at every red light Mark would watch you sing along silently, and whenever you were driving, you'd glance over at Mark, admiring the slope of his nose and his sharp jawline. He was beautiful, to say the least, but staring at him while Ceyando by Frank Ocean played in the background was breathtaking.

You guys stopped at a red light, and then Mark's eyes met yours. You quickly looked away, staring straight ahead at the road in front of you guys. If the red light wasn't shining down on you guys, Mark would've seen the way you blushed. You were everything to him, everything.

and they called off the circus, burned the disco down. when they sent home the horses, and the rodeo clowns. i'm still on that tightrope. i'm still trying everything, to get you laughin' at me.

When you got to Target, Mark opened your door like always. You guys rush inside to fight the cold weather, giggling like little kids. Before you guys start looking around, Mark goes to the bathroom, claiming how he didn't actually get to go at the restaurant.

While he was away, you ordered Starbucks for the two of you, happy that you were partially repaying him for dinner. You waited outside the bathrooms with two hot chocolates in your hand and a big smile on your face. Mark as always, argues with you when you hand him the drink. You ignore him and grab a cart.

You push the cart through the store, both of your cups taking space in the cupholders on the cart. You both throw in random things you need for your homes, from paper towels to shampoo to Gatorade. You gasp with excitement when you see the books and music section, your favorite part of the whole store. You abandon the cart with Mark, running over to the vinyl.

Now that you had your own apartment, you could finally bring your record player from home and have room with it.

"When was the last time you listened to something on vinyl?"

Mark teased you but admired you also as you scoured the shelves of vinyl, gasping at every Taylor Swift or Harry Styles album.

"Well actually Estapa, my new apartment has enough room for my record player now so I listened to one like two days ago!"

He nodded with an amused look, letting out an 'Oh yeah?' to which to nodded aggressively.

Mark saw the way your movements halted when your eyes landed on one vinyl that was at the very back of the stack. Mark recognized it to be a Taylor Swift album, because you had played it in his car before, but he wasn't exactly sure what it was called.

"Oh my god. This is the Folklore Deluxe album, the red pressing. This is so weird, I left this at home for my little sister to have before school started. I haven't seen this album in Target in like over a year."

Mark nodded along with your words, a big smile on his face as he watched how excited you were.

"Oh my gosh I need to play this for you. Okay, on the way home we're listening to the whole thing okay?"

"Yeah, alright, we'll listen to it."

You squealed, giggling as you slid the vinyl into the cart. Mark pushed the cart behind you as you looked through the books, grabbing two that had been on your 'tbr' list for a while.

Mark let his thoughts wander into delusion as he pushed the cart behind you. He thought about grocery shopping with you like you were married. He shocked himself with that thought, quickly shaking it from his head. He hadn't even told you he liked you yet.

You two went to the self-checkouts, splitting your items up and paying. Mark pushed the cart behind you as you exited Target, while you jogged to the car, the cold air seeping into your jacket. You jumped up and down slightly as Mark took as long as possible to get to the car.

You guys quickly loaded the bags into his trunk, and you insisted on pushing the cart back to the cart corral. When you walked back to the car, a crazy thought appeared in your mind. You thought about being married to Mark and loading your shared groceries into your shared car. Lord, you hadn't even told him you liked him yet.

You got back to the car to see your door open and waiting for you. When you got in, the heater in your seat and pushing through the vents enveloped you. Mark smiled, holding up the aux cord for you. You grinned back, snatching it from him and pulling up Spotify, clicking on folklore (deluxe version).

"Okay so, the album starts with 'the 1', and it's about like thinking about your ex that you thought was your soulmate and wishing they were just a little different so that it could've worked out."

"Oh okay, I think you've played this one before."

You nodded as the song faded in, letting him listen to the song. Mark especially loved when you played Taylor Swift, because you always lip sync the "hardest" to her. 'my tears ricochet' faded out when you pulled up to your apartment.

"Oh my gosh, Mark you have to come in and let me play the rest for you. Please? You're gonna love it I promise. Oh, and we can make those cookies we picked out!"

Mark didn't even have to think for two seconds before agreeing, not that he could ever say no to you. The idea of spending the rest of the night with you sounded like heaven. You had Mark park in a visitor spot and you both got out of the car, grabbing your bags from the back. Mark insisted on carrying 4/5 of your bags, even when you argued with him. You led him up and into your apartment. You both took your shoes off by your door, dropping your bags on the kitchen counter.

and i'm still a believer, but i don't know why. i've never been a natural, all i do is try, try, try.

"Sorry it's a little disorganized, I'm still in the rearranging everything stage."

Mark walked in and immediately loved the vibe of your apartment. It was so warm and it smelled good and just was so you.

"I think it looks great, don't worry."

You blushed at that, feeling all giddy over a boy liking the way you had your apartment decorated. You started to put away your perishable groceries but then noticed Mark standing awkwardly on the other side of your kitchen.

"Oh sorry Mark, please make yourself at home!"

He smiled and nodded, walking around the counter over to you, asking if you needed any help with groceries. You asked him to preheat the oven, and he immediately agreed. You then heard a confused call of your name.

"Your oven is like a fuckin' spaceship. How do you work this?"

You laughed so loud, Mark loved it. You walked over from where you were putting the Halloween-themed cookie dough on a baking sheet and stood between Mark and your oven. You preheat the oven successfully before turning around to make a snarky comment but then realized your proximity. Both of your faces warmed before Mark backed away, rubbing the back of his neck with a smile.

It was a little awkward for a beat before you remembered what you invited him in for.

"Oh my gosh, come over here, look at my record player area! It's my favorite place I have decorated so far."

You grabbed your new vinyl off the counter, sliding on your socks over to where you had your record player set up in your living room. You carefully took the wrap off of your new record, grabbing the first vinyl out and gently placing it on your player. You moved the needle to where track 6 started and turned it on, letting the needle drop onto the vinyl.

"This one is my favorite on folklore, it's about like being a people pleaser but also having someone who you don't have to be like that for."

You avoided looking right at Mark when you said it because you realized that's exactly how you felt about him. He was one of the only people that you didn't have to perform for, the one person who preferred when you didn't. What you didn't know was that Mark was smiling so big when you said what the song was about, thinking of you and himself.

You turned up the volume, walking back over to your kitchen to slide the cookies into the oven when the oven beeped, signaling it was finished preheating. You turned and saw Mark standing at your counter, staring right back at you.

"Hmm, oh! You've never been here before, let me give you the tour."

You turned up the record player once again, so you could hear it throughout your space, and led Mark over to the hallway that led to everything else in your apartment.

"So obviously my kitchen and living room, there's a coat closet, but it's pretty much empty still so whatever."

You showed him the bathroom, another closet, laundry room, and then finally you got to your bedroom.

"Okay this is my bedroom, I'm actually like just finishing up with my decorating in here, sorry if it's a little messy."

Mark thought your room looked spotless and beautiful. Everything just screamed you so he loved it. Your salt lamp dimly illuminated your room from your nightstand, the song dancing through the air of your room. Mark looked all around your room before stopping when he saw your photo wall.

There were dozens of photos, Polaroids and printed pictures, photo booth strips, and other mementos from various occasions taped on the wall.

When you saw Mark halted at your wall, you hoped he didn't realize how much of him there was on it. Every picture of you and Mark in existence was printed out and taped to your wall. The ticket stub from when he took you to The Little Mermaid in May. A cut-out drawing he doodled on your page during class once, he was surprisingly good at drawing hockey jerseys.

Mark noticed how often he came up on your wall, then there was one photo that made his eyes widen a little and his heart jump. It was a Polaroid of you and him at a party last year, your arm around his neck as you both smiled widely. That wasn't even the best part to him, the best part was that on the margin underneath the picture, there was just the date, a dash, and then a heart drawn.

He looked over at you and there was a different look in both of your guys' eyes. Some kind of understanding, but still a little bit of fear that your feelings were unrequited. You walked over to Mark, pointing at the photo he had been staring at.

"That's my favorite picture like, ever. That's why it's in the very middle of all of them."

Mark just stared at you, as you stared at the picture. He was so in love with you, it would probably physically hurt him if he held back telling you any longer.

"I think I'm in love with you."

Your eyes widened, head snapping in his direction. You blushed so deep red, that it even spread to your ears. You were stunned, you literally couldn't move your mouth, Mark had just told you exactly what you think every time you look at him. He was in love with you? You would jump up and down in victory, but your downstairs neighbors might not like that. Mark didn't take your silence well, bringing his hand up to rub the back of his neck as he blushed madly.

"Well no I know I am but like it's cool-"

You kissed him, you kissed him. You kissed Mark Estapa after he told you he was in love with you. What fucking universe is this? You kissed him as the bridge of seven played through your home. Your hands framed his face as his hands instinctively held your hips. Butterflies were all either of you felt, whole body tingling and excitement as you kissed each other.

When you pulled away, you were both out of breath, you stared at Mark, so incredibly flustered. Mark took in your rattled appearance and his confidence skyrocketed. He had just got the girl, he was on top of the world.

"So, does that mean like, you like me back or?"

You pushed at his chest, covering your warm face with your hands, hiding your embarrassment and big smile.

"Shut your mouth, but yes."

Mark grinned even wider than he already was, wrapping you up in a hug as august started playing. You both stood there for a minute, taking the moment in. You stood until the timer on the oven went off, indicating your cookies had finished. You pulled out of the hug, taking both of Mark's hands and leading him back to your kitchen, not before he could let out a funny comment.

"I really like this album by the way."

You let out an 'oh yeah?', giggling at his stupidity. You couldn't believe you'd finally gotten him. He was yours, and you could definitely tell that he was the 1.

because i'm a mirrorball. i'm a mirrorball, and i'll show you every version of yourself tonight.

[hugshughes]

my tears ricochet R. McGroarty

Rutger McGroarty x fem!reader

synopsis - Based on “my tears ricochet” by Tay obvs. Reader is on the umich soccer team and when they lose the NCAA championship game, and Rutger is there, reader is confused and sad in a way that he would come to this game after their terrible breakup.

wc - 3.0k!

contains - reader is on the umich soccer team! lightly edited! angst!!!!!!!! then a sprinkle of fluff. reader has a panic attack and has trouble breathing, crying, descriptions of a terrible breakup, kissing, happy ending, lmk!

an - this was probably the hardest one so far, other than the last great american dynasty, which i promise is coming soon! ALSO. 200 FOLLOWERS????? THANK U GUYS! I swear I’m trying to speed up the process of writing these but it’s harder than I thought. I've been getting more requests than usual lately! You guys are all so cute btw. I've gotten multiple about Behind My Back with Nolan part 2 and it's on the way! I'm so slow at writing smut. Anyways hope you enjoyyyy!

-

we gather here, we like up, weepin’ in a sunlit room. and if i’m on fire, you’ll be made of ashes too.

The final whistle blew, the game was over. You crouched to the ground, palm flat on the field as you wept. You could barely breathe as the UNC team flooded the field, screaming in victory, group-hugging 10 feet from you. 4-3 in overtime. You dropped to sit on the ground, arms loosely wrapped around your knees as you stared at the crowd.

The sea of Carolina blue jumping up and down, smiling, shouting. The motionless pit of maize and navy, crying, grief, disappointment. In you. They’re all disappointed in you, that’s what you tell yourself.

Your best friend sits next to you, enveloping you in a hug, you hear her whimpers, you feel her tears.

“I’m so sorry.”

She shook her head at you, hugging you tighter than ever before pulling away, holding your face, wiping your cheeks.

“No, don’t say that. This isn’t your fault. Okay? It isn’t. You scored 2 of our goals tonight, and you just did so good okay? This isn’t your fault.”

You looked at the ground, trying to catch your breath. You’re only a sophomore, you’ll have more championships to win. She didn’t though, she was a senior.

“This was just your last game, and I just- I let you down and coach and-”

“Honey, it’s okay. I’ll be okay. You cannot blame this game just on you.”

You hesitantly nod, letting her help you to your feet. The rest of your team is hugging, some crying, some seething, some trying to smile.

You run to your coach, she opens her arms wide to hug you. She’s trying to smile, trying to tell you that it’s okay as you heave out the word sorry over and over, sobbing as you try to catch your breath, to no avail.

Your chest heaves as you try to breathe, but nothing is going in or out, you’re about to have a panic attack. You grip your jersey where your heart is, the navy material soiled from tears and sweat. Your coach lets out a curse as she realizes what’s going on, your best friend sees you, running over, holding your arms, trying to calm you down.

You can’t, you were warm before, but now it’s like you’re suffocating.

“I- I can’t! Fuck, I-”

The worse you cry the less you can breathe, but the less you’re breathing the more you’re crying.

Your trainer runs over, hand on your back as she urges you off to the sidelines. You know there are dozens of cameras on you, making everything ten times worse.

It’s time for you guys to shake hands but instead, you are urged off the field, down through the tunnel, and to the locker rooms. They sit you down in your designated stall, offering water, fanning you with random papers, holding your hands, everything as you start to breathe again. When you’re finally steadily breathing again, you feel embarrassed.

“I’m so sorry! Shit- I just-”

They just shush you, hugging you tight. You, as the star player of Michigan Women’s Soccer are informed you’re doing press with your best friend, the captain, now. You almost cry again, you know someone is bound to ask about your leaving the field early.

But here you are, sitting next to your best friend, holding hands under the table for some form of stability as you look at the reporters and flashing cameras in front of you, fans behind them.

Your best friend answers the majority of the first chunk of questions, you only chiming in a few times. Your name is called by a reporter, a question just for you.

“Would you like to comment on what happened with your early departure after the game?”

You tense, your best friend’s hold on your hand tightens, comforting you as much as possible.

“Oh um, yeah. So uh, I was having some trouble breathing and stuff and I needed to go back to the locker room. I apologize if I came across as rude to any of the UNC girls, I still definitely want to congratulate them.”

The reporter nods, and you get sad smiles from almost everyone you can see. You get another question about your performance.

“I think I definitely could’ve played better, I’m disappointed in my performance tonight, I’ve apologized to teammates and coaches. I did as well as I could in the moment, Carolina is a really talented group of girls. I-”

You see him, Rutger fucking McGroaty, standing at the back of the group, Ethan, Mark, Dylan, and a few other hockey players with him. Your voice catches, and your mind is blank.

even on my worst day, did i deserve, babe, all the hell you gave me? ‘cause i loved you, i swear i loved you. ‘til my dying day.

The eye contact is full of pain, you feel your heart stutter. Your breathing that had finally started evening out is suddenly picking back up, but also somehow slowing down? It just, hurts. Why was he here? Why would he do that to you?

What was he trying to do? Was he trying to see you? Was he just trying to watch the game?

You looked to your coach, the attention of the reporters on your best friend, with pleading eyes. She nods for you to leave, and you silently thank her, slipping out of the seat and discreetly exiting the room, having to walk right by the guys, and some fans along the way. You wave at a little girl dressed head to toe in maize and blue, your jersey adorning her little body.

You crouched down next to her, letting her grab your hand.

“Hi sweetheart, how are you doing?”

She smiles brightly, making your heart swell. She has your number drawn out on her cheek, and a Michigan temporary tattoo on the other.

“I’m good! It was fun watching you play, even if you couldn’t win. I saw you crying, are you okay? You still did really really awesome, even my brother thinks so!”

She gestures to her slightly older brother, a boy who looked about 8.

“Oh yeah, I’ll be okay. Well sweetheart, if you’d like it, I would love to sign your jersey.”

Her face lights up, she squeals and hugs you, which you accept. She turns around and you sign right next to your number on her maize jersey. She thanks you and squeezes your hand while taking a picture with you. You’re finishing up with them when her brother almost shouts.

“Are those the Mich hockey guys?”

You freeze, eyes darting from the ground to the little boy and then up to Rutger's shocked face. Rutger quickly puts his fan persona on, greeting the kids.

'cause i loved you, i swear i loved you. 'til my dying day.

You realize you're position, frozen and staring at Rutger in front of all these people, and you quickly turn to go. You get about ten feet when you hear someone quietly shout your name, then twice. Someone, being Rutger. You didn't wanna talk to him. You really did want to talk to him, you just knew you couldn't.

You are in the tunnel at this point, striding a few more feet to make sure no one can see you before stopping when he says your name once again. When you turn around he stares at you silently, his eyes filled with hurt. You wish you could run into his arms, but you can't, you can't.

i didn't have it in myself to go with grace, and you're the hero flying around, saving face. and if i'm dead to you why are you at the wake?

"What are you doing here Rut?"

You could feel the tears lining your eyes, pushing to break past your waterline. He has the same tears, which hurt you even more.

"I'm sorry."

That you lost? That he came here? That he called for you? That he broke your heart?

"For what, Rutger?"

The tears were close to spilling for both of you. He lets out a shaky exhale, wiping his nose and sniffling.

"I- Um, everything? I just, I'm sorry."

cursing my name, wishing i stayed. look at how my tears ricochet.

You didn't know what to do. Part of you was about to throw yourself into his arms while another part was about to sprint as far away from him as you could.

He stood there, quickly wiping a tear that fell. In this moment, losing the game was the farthest thing from your mind. Everything in your mind was just completely overwhelmed with him. At one point he was everything to you, you knew in part of you he still was.

we gather stones, never knowing what they'll mean. some to throw, some to make a diamond ring.

When you and Rutger had broken up, it had been terrible for both of you. Rutger wasn't allowed to be alone afterward for two weeks, not that you knew that, his friends wanted to tell you and try to get you back to him but he wouldn't let them. He was too embarrassed by the idea. His friends begging for you for him because he couldn't handle a breakup? Please. What Rutger doesn't know is that you would've run straight back to him if you'd known. He was your lifeline.

Your relationship was like a dream, you'd started dating in July of 2022 and broke up the next May. You guys were inseparable, in a cute way. You guys were always there for each other, no matter what. But out of nowhere, in April, Rutger started freaking out about everything happening in his life. The team had just lost the frozen four, and he was just hurt from that and he was not himself. Even weeks after, when the other boys had seemingly gotten over it, he couldn't seem to shake the feeling in his chest.

The feeling started affecting other parts of his life, too. Specifically, your relationship. He'd become way cut off from you, and a lot more mean. It went on for three weeks before you broke up with him. You just couldn't keep trying when you were getting nothing back, even though it hurt you so badly to do it.

you know i didn't want to have to haunt you. but what a ghostly scene. you wear the same jewels that i gave you, as you bury me.

You rub your eyes before looking up from the ground to him, and then you see it. The ring he once gave you on a chain around his neck. He'd kept it when you gave it back to him.

You remember every detail about the night he gave you that ring. Where he'd taken you, how he held you in the cold of February nights in Ann Arbor. You remember his confession of love to you. How he was worried you'd think he was proposing, how he shakily opened the ring box when you got back to his room, and how he said he wanted to give it to you in your scenic snowy walk through a local park but had gotten too nervous. You remember how you kissed him, and how he brought tears to your eyes.

i didn't have it in myself to go with grace. 'cause when i'd fight, you used to tell me i was brave. and if i'm dead to you why are you at the wake? cursing my name, wishing i stayed. look at how my tears ricochet.

Him being here, crying, apologizing, you losing the game, everything was just so much, but when you looked into his eyes he was still your everything. Your boy, the one that made you fall in love with every part of him, every crack and crevice, every flaw. He was still yours, no matter if you were together or apart. And you were his too, you knew that, you both did.

You can't imagine what your friends would think if you'd told them how close you were to kissing Rutger right now. They would never believe you, not after the months you spent trying oh so hard to convince yourself you were better off without him, no matter how false that statement was.

You knew you would need him, always did. He didn't know that though, when he would stalk your social media all summer, seeing you post in your little white linen dresses, having fun at the beach with your friends, he convinced himself he'd never get another chance with you. And you knew that if he tried hard enough, he could completely win you back, 100 times over.

and i can go anywhere i want, anywhere i want, just not home. and you can aim for my heart, go for blood, but you would still miss me in your bones.

He was your safe haven, whenever you were with him everything was just good, you didn't have to worry about anything with him, he wouldn't let you. He was your person.

You just stared at him, thoughts running a thousand miles per minute. You wanted him, you needed him. You knew it, too. He was always gonna be the only man that ever came to mind when you heard a love song by Taylor Swift, the only man you thought of when you saw a husband and wife with a little baby on your for you page, the only one.

i didn't have it in myself to go with grace.

He sniffled again, and you practically lunged at him, wrapping your arms around his neck and tucking your head into the crook of his neck. You started to cry again as his arms went around your hips, holding you so tightly. He was so warm, he smelled so good, he was definitely home for you if you had one. You felt his tears fall onto the base of your neck. He was mumbling i love yous and i'm sorrys like prayers. You just said the three words back, telling him it was okay because you knew it would be. As long as you had him.

and so the battleships will sink beneath the waves. you had to kill me, but it killed you just the same. cursing my name, wishing i stayed.

You pulled away from him, just a little, his tight hold on you barely let up, he couldn't let you go. You cupped his cheeks with your hands, looking into his now bloodshot, but otherwise beautiful blue eyes. You giggled, this was so crazy, you couldn't even believe it. Your amusement at the situation must've made Rutger feel embarrassed because he shook his head from your hold and buried his head into your neck. You could see his rose tinted ears. You ran your hands through his hair.

You had not the slightest idea what this meant for you two, but it definitely felt right, like you were whole again. You knew that he would come back to your life, you always felt it. And you knew you guys were gonna have to have a serious long talk about everything, but right now it just felt so good to take solace in him, acting like you were never broken up.

you turned into your worst fears. and you're tossing out blame, drunk on this pain. crossing out the good years.

If you knew one thing, it was that Rutger McGroaty was your boy, and you were his girl. No matter how much time kept you apart you'd always find each other again. You loved him, too much to lose him. Especially now that you were both given another chance.

"Rut?"

He moved his head a little, adjusting his arms around your hips, grumbling out an 'mhm?'

"I'm really happy you're here."

He came out of hiding at that, smiling at you, you smiled back, partially because of how cute he looked with slightly puffy eyes and rosy cheeks.

"For real?"

You gave him a pointed look, 'duh', written all over your features. He smiled brighter, his perfect teeth on display, oh you so hoped he would never experience any teeth loss during his hockey career, even though he'd probably look fucking adorable.

"I love you. I'm not letting you down ever again, I promise. I'm gonna be perfect, okay?"

You looked at him like he had just hung the stars one by one. You shook your head mumbling something about how you loved him so much and he'd never let you down and he was already perfect in your book before pulling him into a kiss. He smiled so hard into the kiss, and so did you.

Even though you'd just lost one of the most important soccer games in your life, you'd just won someone that was more important than any soccer trophy you could ever receive.

and you're cursing my name, wishing i stayed. look at how my tears ricochet.

[hugshughes]

The 1 A. Fantilli

Adam Fantilli x fem!reader

synopsis - based on “the 1” by Taylor Swift obvs. The school year starts back up at the University of Michigan and after your break up with Adam, you’re trying to live life freely but can’t seem to get the idea of him and your relationship off your mind. But what happens when you see him again, and you both are yearning for each other more than ever before?

wc - 4.5k (:0)

contains - lowkey angst but also very fluffy closure, reader cries, miscommunication a little bit (i know), kissing, cuddling. (if i missed anything please let me know!!!!)

an - this is the first part in my folklore 100 follower celebration! i’m so excited for it! i do not loveeee this but i really wanted to get this first part out! hopefully you guys like this! here is the masterlist to this celebration. me when im about to make a fic based off “the 1” have a happy ending 😊. also sorry this took longer than expected i has surgery the other day and did not pop back to normal like i assumed i would lmao. please someone get the betty refernce at the end ;))) also i still need a player to use for my betty fic for this celebration so… someone request someone. also this is barely edited so sorry. also should i make a taglist?? would anyone like that??

-

i’m doing good, i’m on some new shit. been saying “yes” instead of “no”.

To say you were definitely doing much better now that August had arrived was a true statement. You’d been a wreck most of the summer over your breakup with Adam, but as the summer started to slow down and your tan glowed, you felt you heart get lighter and rid itself of it’s burdens.

You and Adam had broken up just a little bit before the draft. The prospect of him being in Anaheim while you finished school in Ann Arbor sounded like an impossible feat to conquer.

You also knew what the newfound NHL fame would bring Adam, even more attention than before, new people, new friends, new girls surrounding him. And while you knew Adam would never in a million years cheat on you, you didn’t want him to feel like he had to be tied to something, someone, 2,234 miles away, to be exact.

When you watched the draft and saw Leo get drafted to Anaheim, your heart sank to your stomach. Many tears were shed that night, knowing the boy you loved with all of you wouldn’t be 2,234 miles away, only 190.

You assumed that if he wanted you back he would’ve called, or texted, or emailed, or sent a letter, anything. But you got nothing, so you accepted that he was perfectly okay with still being apart. Even though it did hurt because you remembered the night both of you cuddled close and whispered about how amazing it would be if he went to Columbus and not Anaheim.

i thought i saw you at the bus stop, i didn’t though.

When school started back up, you couldn’t help but see him everywhere you went. You did feel better, and you were healing, but it did instill an ache in your chest when you’d see your favorite study spot, your table at the starbucks right off campus, his dorm building, everything.

You even thought you saw him there once, your eyes widened with fear as you thought you saw him standing at a bus stop on campus but it wasn’t him, just another brunette boy, but not yours.

i hit the ground running each night. i hit the sunday matinée. you know the greatest films of all time were never made.

It was hard for about a week or so, being back in the place where you fell head over heels in love with him, but your friends would always be quick to cheer you up and tell you “it’s gonna be okay.” And most of the time you believed them.

You’d gone to many more parties than you had last year, you were usually trying to spend time with Adam and you two preferred being alone together than things like parties.

You felt the ache when you saw a guy taking his girlfriend to the Barbie movie, as stupid as that seems. You and your friends had all waited to see it until you were back together and you were all dolled up in your pink outfits. But you couldn’t help but have that same ache when you remembered Adam promising to take you to see if, and promising to wear pink just for you.

Obviously, that never happened. After the movie you couldn’t help but pull up your photos and scroll through your ‘Adam🤍’ album, the videos got to you the most.

Adam had made you film yourself when you opened your birthday gift from him, you had no idea why.

“Baby, why am I filming this?”

“Because, I want to be able to rewatch your reaction to it!”

You give him a funny look, and he urges you to open the big bag, seeing a jersey, a Michigan jersey. You’re pretty confused because you have a Fantilli jersey already, one you wear often. You pull it out of the bag and unfold it and turn it around, and then you see it. Instead of Fantilli across the back, it says “MY MAN”. Your jaw drops, you start laughing so hard, like stomach hurting from how hard you’re laughing.

Adam joins in your laughter, asking if you like it. You tackle him in a hug, kissing his cheek twice.

“It’s so perfect!”

The video was perfect, it ended in your phone falling from it’s propped up place on your desk as you kissed Adam. You felt happy and sad when you saw it. Happy that it happened, that you were able to ever experience that kind of love. Sad because it was all gone now.

i guess you never know, never know. and if you wanted me, you really should’ve showed. and if you never bleed, you’re never gonna grow.

You know that if you had the chance, you’d go back to Adam without thinking for two seconds. He was the best thing that you’d ever been graced with. He was everything to you, and you know that in a tucked away part of your heart he still is.

You just wish you both had tried harder, because you both loved each other with all of your beings. You just wished you both showed how much you really wanted it at the end, but both of you were scared of how the other was feeling.

but we were something, don’t you think so? roaring 20’s, tossing pennies in the pool.

In the middle of the night, when you’re staring at the ceiling of your room after watching Adam’s newest highlights you tend to always think about one thing; if he still thinks about you, the way you do him.

You hoped he did, you hoped you weren’t the furthest thing from his mind at all times. And if you were to ask him, he would tell you that you were all he could think of for months, you were the only thing on his mind when he woke up, and when he went to sleep. Columbus was fun, and new, and exciting, but you were everything to him.

Adam had hoped you’d send him a text the night of the draft, and then he’d be able to start talking to you again. But, you never texted, you were worried he wouldn’t care if you did. You didn’t want to embarrass yourself.

and if my wishes came true it would’ve been you.

You had wished on 11:11s, fallen stars, eyelashes, candles, four-leaf clovers, everything, that you and Adam would be together always, and that didn’t end when you broke up, you still wished for him, always.

in my defense, i have none. for never leaving well enough alone. but it would’ve been fun, if you would’ve been the one.

You always felt like you were doing something wrong towards the end of your relationship, not because of Adam. It was because you just had a voice in the back of your head telling you that you weren’t doing enough for him and that you were making him upset, and it led to you doing things to try to fix that but only would end up making things worse.

You just needed him always, you two were inseparable. You were at every home game, a good amount of the away games, and then you were almost always together during any free time you two had. While you were only together for about a year, you could see your life with Adam. He had said something to you about wanting to marry you, 5 months after you started dating. You were just it for each other.

i have this dream you’re doing cool shit. having adventures on your own. you meet some woman on the internet and take her home.

You think about if he has met another girl yet. You know that those hockey teams like going out together and they definitely attract lots of female attention. The ache came back at the thought of him sleeping in the same bed as another woman.

we never painted by the numbers, baby. but we were making it count.

Some people thought your relationship was, unrealistic, in a sense. You and Adam were together all the time, and it made certain family members and friends question what would happen after the draft came and Anaheim took your boyfriend from you. But obviously, Anaheim didn’t take your boyfriend, Columbus did, which made the breakup hurt even more.

Every minute you spent with Adam was full of love. There were very little disagreements, and the few that did take place were always out of love, which also made everything hurt more. No one could’ve seen your breakup coming, you two included, it just came up one night and ended up with you two calling it quits. It was the first time you’d ever seen Adam cry, and that broke you inside.

you know the greatest loves of all time are over now. i guess you never know, never know. and it’s another day waking up alone.

Sometimes you wake up and forget he’s not yours anymore, that he might even be someone else’s. And then you snap back to reality and it hits you like a train. Your roommates sometimes leave sticky notes to you that you’re gonna be okay, that’s everything’s okay. He was the greatest thing ever. Your love for him conquered all.

i, i, i persist and resist the temptation to ask you, if one thing had been different. would everything be different today?

You just play back every single moment in your head. Wondering if you’d done anything different if you’d still be his, if he’d still love you how he did. What you didn’t know was that he was doing the same exact thing 190 miles from you, resisting the urge to text you.

Adam was counting down the days until his birthday, praying that you would text him, allowing him to start a conversation with you. You were as well, having typed out your birthday message to him already, weeks early, waiting to be sent.

but we were something, don’t you think so? rosé flowing with your chosen family. and it would’ve been sweet, if it could’ve been me.

You two would spend nights with his friends, the boys he loved most, and his teammates because you wanted them to like you because he liked them. You wanted to be able to have their approval and you definitely did. Your friendships lasting with a few of the players, specifically Dylan Duke.

Dylan had been so incredibly sweet to you when you met, understanding how it probably felt to be surrounded by a team of boys who you didn’t know. He was someone you could hang out with at hockey parties when you felt like you were being too clingy to Adam.

in my defense i have none, for digging up the grave another time.

Dylan had been begging you to come to a hockey game since before the season started. And you were finally convinced so you are going to attend the 2nd Providence game. They won last night 2-4 and were hoping to do the same again.

You felt the ache when you were searching through your umich gear for your outfit to the game and found your Fantilli jerseys. You took a deep breath and pushed it off, grabbing a blue and maize crewneck and throwing it on over your leggings and blazers and leaving.

You got into the Children of Yost section pretty easily, but it was always a hassle nonetheless. You found some friends and stood with them, shouting cheers when the guys skated out.

You and your friends were pretty close to the glass in the student section, only a few rows back, so you were able to see the guys really well. You screamed when Dylan scored his first goal of the night, he saw you and laughed so hard. Luca, who was hugging his teammate was confused by how hard Dylan was laughing, and looked to see what the source of his entertainment was. When he saw you, jumping up and down with your friends, screaming for Dylan, he was shocked. Shocked you’d even come to a game. And then his eyes widened when he realized his brother was here, watching him play.

When the first period was over the Childen of Yost settled down and danced to the songs and did the little games that came up to on the jumbotron. Your fun halted when you saw Adam come up on the screen, the words “Welcoming back former Wolverines!” and his names flashing on it. Your friends saw and their jaws dropped. He hadn’t been at the game the night before, of course he hadn’t, of course this was the game he came to.

You brushed it off and insisted that you were fine. You continued to have fun and mess around with your friends during the break in between periods. But then Adam had the shock of his life, staring at the screen as the view of you and your friends dancing to American Boy by Estelle & Kanye as the cameras showed different groups of the Children of Yost.

The second he gets over his shock you’re off the screen, and he’s slightly leaning out of his seat, searching the crowd of the student section, and then he saw you, messing around and playing with your friends. Part of him wishes you were in his jersey, as unrealistic as that seems. He wonders if you still have his jerseys, if they’re in a thrift store somewhere, or if they’re tucked away in the bottom of a box in your room.

He knows Dylan probably convinced you to come, because Dylan was your favorite of his friends, and the two of you guys were “besties” whenever you were together. He wonders if you’ll go down towards the locker room after the game to see Dylan and if he’ll get to see you again.

The game ended soon enough, the guys winning 3-4 with 2 goals from Duker. He texted you after the game to come down, wanting to go to eat with you after.

-

from: Duka👊

Dude come down after I wanna go eat

from: Y/n/n🤝

idk duke i kinda wanna go home

from: Duka👊

Bro no you have to stop being a loser

from: Y/n/n🤝

fine.

-

He liked your message and you let out a sigh,

“Hey guys, I’m gonna go down and see Duke. I’ll see you guys later, okay?”

They nodded and gave you light hugs, telling you random things that are always part of girl goodbyes.

“Are you sure, do you think Adam’ll be down there, babe?”

You sighed again, shrugging, hugging her tighter.

“Don’t know, but I can’t let him stop me from doing things, right? If I see him, I see him. I don’t know if he’ll say anything to me, but if he does I’ll just talk to him normally, you know?”

The girls all nod, saying goodbye again, telling you things about your said “girl power”. You made your way through the arena, getting let through by security and heading back to the hall where the players come out.

You kept your head in your phone as you leaned against the wall, snapping people, scrolling through Instagram, and texting your mom about the game.

Dylan came out fast compared to usual. You high-fived him as he came up to you, congratulating him on his two goals. He thanked you and then was quick to try to get you guys to leave.

“Dylan, It’s okay. I know he’s here. I’m not gonna like, run away from him. Alright?”

“Yeah alright, he was just in the locker room and I was worried you might not know, 'cause I didn’t even know, so.”

You nodded and smiled at him, patting his shoulder in thanks. Then you realized he was missing something.

“Dylan, did you leave your phone in the locker room?”

He looked at you in confusion, then patting the pocket on his bag, and then his sweatpants pockets, then his sweatshirt pocket, but came up empty.

“Shit. Alright, I’ll be back in half a second, wait here.”

You nod and he hands you his backpack, racing back to the locker room. You put his bag on your back and look back at your phone again. And then you hear him, his laugh. You don’t even wanna look up, you glance out of the corner of your eye, seeing his silhouette.

You freeze in your stance, fingers pausing on your screen. You hear him, Luca, and Mark talking very loudly. Adam sees the bag on your back first “DUKE #25” along the side of it. Then he realizes it’s you. He quiets down very quickly, almost stopping in his tracks.

Luca notices his baby brother’s change in attitude instantly, whipping his head to the side, his eyes meeting your figure. Mark, somehow sees you and his mind doesn’t think for two seconds. He calls your name, happy as ever.

“Hey! Come here I haven’t seen you in forever. What’s up?”

You wince at his obliviousness, or maybe his uncaring of the situation. You squeeze your eyes shut for a second before putting a smile on.

“Hey Mark, I’m fine. How are you?”

He nods and replies, half hugging you and pulling you back towards his group. Luca quickly says hey to you, wrapping his arms around you briefly.

You look at Adam, your eyes softening. He looks at you as if you’re the only girl in the world, and to him, you are. You go to say hey to him but he hugs you before words can come out. He holds you so so tightly, and you practically grip him. Fuck, you missed him.

“Hey, Adam.”

You feel him take a deep breath in, rubbing his hand up and down your back.

“Missed you.”

“Missed you too, Adam.”

You both seem to realize you aren’t alone and you pull away, clearing your throat as the other two boys look at you with huge smiles. You feel heat radiating from your cheeks as the four of you stand there.

The awkward silence is cut off by Dylan racing back through the hall.

“Hey dude, sorry I took so long. Ty started asking me about something-”

He stopped himself when he saw you standing inches from Adam, a blush covering your face. He tries to cover the smile overtaking his face.

“Oh hey guys, um well, we were about to go eat, you guys wanna join?”

Your eyes widened at Dylan, cursing at him in your head, hoping you’d gained mind powers that could disintegrate him. Just because you can stand here and hug him doesn’t mean you can sit and eat dinner with him.

Mark jumps to accept, telling you two that you should also invite the other guys still in the locker room. You agree, thinking the more the merrier for your situation. You and Dylan let the other guys know and then take off. In the car, you turn to Dylan and almost shout at him.

“Dylan Duke! What the fuck?”

He smiles at you, that stupid smile. You shake your head and sigh loudly leaning back against the headrest and closing your eyes.

“I saw how you were looking at each other in there. And Mark whispered to me about your hug. I know that this is for your own good dude. At least get civil with him.”

You sigh and nod, your eyes still closed. Dylan lets out a noise of agreement, and you two drive to your chosen restaurant.

When you pull up to a restaurant on a Saturday night and ask for a table for 10, you usually are looked at like you have two heads. But in Ann Arbor, when a umich hockey player comes in and asks that, they will make it happen.

You and Dylan were the first to get there, sitting across from each other at the far end of the table. Tyler, Rutger, and Ethan arrive next, Tyler sitting at the end chair between you and Dylan, and Rut and Eth sitting next to Dylan. Adam, Luca, and Mark arrived next. You watched Mark push Adam forward to sit in the space on your right.

He smiles at you awkwardly as he sits down next to you, making sure to leave a comfortable amount of space between you. Lastly, Seamus and Mackie arrive, taking the last two seats at the table. All the guys were talking around you while you checked your phone every minute or so to try to look busy. You glance to your side and notice Adam as bored as you.

“Hey Fants.”

His head quickly turns to you, a bright smile adorning his features.

“Hi.”

“How’s Columbus? Sorry I never congratulated you, I just-”

“Hey! It’s okay, I understand, alright? But it’s nice, I’ve made a couple of new friends and stuff. It was nice already knowing people there.”

“Yeah, yeah. That’s really good Adam.”

Adam stared at you longingly as you stared at your fingers. You were messing with the rings you always wore, then realized how you were wearing your ring from Adam. You felt like you couldn’t let him see it, worried you might embarrass yourself. You covered your hand with your other, trying to make your position look as natural as possible.

When you looked back over to him and he was already staring at you, you swear your heart started pounding, even more so than already. His eyes looked sad, something so uncommon to see him feeling. He’d always been your happy boy, always bringing you up and making you better.

You would rather climb to the rooftops and scream to every Ann Arbor citizen of your everlasting love for Adam than even whisper it to him. His eyes, though, they’re like the ocean. One look and all of your senses are gone.

“I really missed you Adam.”

You didn’t look at him when you whispered it, you stared at the football game playing on the TV across the restaurant, the Bengals were winning by 14. Your hand pressed into the wood of your chair next to your thigh, running your fingers back and forth across the grain. You didn’t flinch physically when you felt his hand brush over yours, but your heart felt like it was about to implode.

“You have no idea how much I missed you.”

You finally got the courage to look into his eyes. You turn, just a little, and look at him, the raw look on his face, his glazed-over eyes, his bit at lips, your boy, he’d always been yours, always will be.

“And, you have no idea how badly I want to kiss you right now.”

He mumbled it, not caring if you heard or not, he just knew he had to say it, if not to you then to admit it to himself, that he wanted to kiss you.

Adam watched as your eyes widened innocently, he loves everything you do. He just stared, he knew you heard him, he didn’t know what to do after that, and neither did you. You seemed to have gotten lost in the moment, forgetting about the 8 other hockey players surrounding you, who had honestly mostly just stopped really talking to each other and were mostly watching you and Adam.

In that moment, you couldn’t even hear them, you couldn’t even see them. They were blurry, muted, and muffled, but looking at Adam, it was so clear. You weren’t thinking, you were just following whatever split-second decision your heart made and grabbed his face, kissing Adam. You fucking kissed him. His hands wrapped around your wrists, kissing you back immediately. You kissed for maybe three seconds, the hustle and bustle all around coming back to you.

You pulled away from him first, if it was his choice he would’ve made out with you right there in front of everyone. You looked at him with wide eyes, and he still had his big beautiful smile. You hear an ‘oh shit’ come from Luca’s mouth, and then the rest of the guys at the table going crazy and immediately feel embarrassed. Your face burns as you quickly wipe your lips with your sleeve, burying your face in your hands as a smile reluctantly makes its way to your face.

Adam has the biggest grin on his face as he scoots his chair closer to you, wrapping his arm around you, pulling you close. Adam’s hand rests on your hip, tracing shapes already like it was never gone. Like it was home after being away for far too long. You know the two of you would have a big conversation about everything later. But for right now, you just let him hold you, and you let him order for you, because he always knew what you wanted, even now.

When dinner came, Adam’s hand left your hip, but it ended up holding yours under the table like you were two fourteen-year-olds hiding from your parents. He started messing with your hand, pulling it more into his lap so he could play with it with both of his hands. He’d always done this when you were together, he would mess with your hand while he talked to others at dinners or parties or anything.

Adam was shocked when he felt it, the cool band on your ring finger. He looked down at your hand, eyes widening when he saw his ring still adorning your finger. He stared at you with so so much love in his eyes, from across the table, Luca could see how happy his baby brother was, and he was so thankful for you.

“You still have my ring on.”

You couldn’t tell if it was a question or a statement when he whispered to you. You looked down at the band on your finger, smiling sheepishly at him and blushing. You nodded slowly, not knowing how to explain it to him.

“I just really like it. And I just really like you, so.”

He laughs, nodding at you with amusement, letting out an ‘Oh yeah?’ to which you nod assuringly.

You knew he was the 1. You’d known when he had first introduced himself to you. You could tell that this new beginning to your relationship was going to last, that the time apart only made you both stronger. You’d always loved him, and always will, and if kissing him in a crowded restaurant in front of all of his stupid friends is what it takes to have him, you definitely would.

but it would’ve been fun, if you would’ve been the one.

[hugshughes]

mad woman N. Moyle

Nolan Moyle x fem!reader

synopsis - Nolan is back in the place you two fell in love, and he can't get you out of his mind.

wc - 2.5k!

contains - UNEDITED SORRY!! cursing, NO HAPPY ENDING!(between Nolan and reader, I don't leave my readers sad you know that), um asshole!nolan as fuck, MAD WOMAN BY TSWIFT?????, um yeah i don't know, BAD BITCH!READER (you go girl), hints at future!frank nazar x reader (YOU KNOW I HAVE A HARD TIME HELPING MYSELF!!!!!!!)

an - hey y'all....... im not deceased!!! um yeah HOPE U HAD A GOOD HOLIDAYSSSSSS. some of this I couldn't tell, if it was funny or cringe so don't hate me. I don't loveeeeeee this but whatever. Frank is so cute SOMEONE REQUEST HIM ;))) anyways love u hope you enjoy!

-

what did you think i'd say to that? does a scorpion sting when fighting back?

Nolan felt weird. It was the first time he was back in Ann Arbor since leaving for China in the summer. He was stopping to see the boys and watch a hockey game before going back home to New York.

It was the first time he'd been in Ann Arbor since you broke up. The breakup was rough. There had been a lead up for weeks before, all you did was argue. You couldn't understand him, or anything he was doing. When you found out he was going to move to China, you felt like that was him saying you weren't important to him. He didn't seem even slightly upset about having to leave you, and when you were hysterical over it, he just called you crazy.

they strike to kill, and you know i will. you know i will.

When you realized Nolan wasn't going to be anything but indifferent about the situation, all you felt was rage. Maybe you were crazy, you felt it.

Nolan had been your boyfriend since you were a freshman, and he was a junior at Michigan. You dated for almost three years, and then he threw you to the side. Now you were interning in the athletics department at Michigan while you finished school, and you were talking with your supervisors about a job opening after graduation, so you were sticking around in Ann Arbor for a while longer.

It was honestly embarrassing the way you tried for you two, while it seemed he couldn't have cared less. The boys felt bad, they'd known you their whole college careers, you'd help them through losses, comforted them, cared for them. You were the best female influence they had while at college.

They hung out with you all summer, trying to include you in all of their activities, because they knew what you were going through. They loved Nolan, and they loved you. You didn't make them feel like they had to choose, and Nolan really couldn't even if he wanted to, being on the other side of the world from all of you.

You were still in Ann Arbor, along with the boys because they still had hockey games to play before they could go home for winter break, and you worked with the hockey team in the winter, so you were sticking around as well.

what do you sing on your drive home? do you see my face in the neighbors lawn?

Nolan couldn't get you off of his mind as he drove through the small Michigan college town. He saw you everywhere. You were the only person that had stuck around with him while most of his friends left to the NHL over the years. You could tell at the last moments of your breakup Nolan was jealous, he was jealous of people like Luke, who was leaving from their loss in Tampa straight to Boston to sign with the Devils. He had always dreamed of it, but had just not come close enough.

China would take him away from it all, a new place, as far away as he could be, because it did hurt to look at all the guys he captained, knowing they'd go on to do greater things than him.

He deflected what was going on in his head to you. He accused you of being crazy, and envious, and insecure, but it was him. He felt so shitty about himself on the inside that he threw it all to you.

does she smile? or does she mouth, "fuck you forever"? every time you call me crazy, i get more crazy.

Nolan was being suffocated by the overwhelming sense of you, that Ann Arbor held. Every corner, every road, every stoplight.

Nolan pulled into a parking spot on the side of the street, unbuckling his seatbelt and turning the car off. He sat in the empty car for a few minutes. Would you be there when he walked into the dinner the boys had planned? He knew they were really close with you, seeing as he stalked your and their Instagram profiles often.

He didn't know if the guys would do it to him. He also didn't know if they knew that seeing you would affect him so much.

You knew Nolan was invited to this dinner, but you didn't really care. You'd met your peace with him over the summer, at least in your mind, you were happy. Single life had been treating you well, you were prioritizing yourself, your friends, your family, and your career and it was a perfect balance for you.

what about that? and when you say i seem angry, i get more angry.

You'd always loved the idea of working for a sports team, specifically hockey. You'd been the daughter of the Minnesota Twins physical therapist since you were born, so seeing the behind the scenes of major league teams was always exciting for you. You'd gotten your first opportunity to work with sports teams in high school, when you had an internship with a smaller hockey team in Minnesota, and since then you'd loved working with hockey. It was how you met Nolan, interning with the Michigan team your freshman year.

You were already on your second drink when you saw Nolan walk into the restaurant. Seeing him left a pit of red hot anger in your stomach. You just looked away from him before he could catch you and kept talking to Luca. Maybe the anger never left, you didn't care as long as the love you had for him did.

and there's nothing like a mad woman. what a shame she went mad.

You chose not to acknowledge him, and he understood why. The last time you talked to him, you were screaming, crying, completely confused as to why he didn't love you like you loved him. You didn't understand how after committing three years to him, he could throw all of it away without a second thought. He probably had someone. Someone he could entertain halfway across the world.

You both ignored each other, deciding it best not to talk. You knew that it wouldn't end well, the rage sitting in your chest would release itself the second you said a word to Nolan. You both drank, a lot. You partially because you wanted to get your mind off of him, and partially because Luca was challenging you to go shot for shot with him.

Nolan was embarrassed before you two broke up, and he still was, sort of. Then, he was embarrassed because he felt like he wasn't talented enough to lead his team that was chock-full of NHL prospects. Now he was embarrassed because he had realized what he let go when he let you go. And obviously all these boys could tell he had lost a good one, because they all loved and admired you so heavily.

Nolan wasn't exactly good at handling emotions like embarrassment and insecurity, since being raised on "men don't cry" mentalities. And when he was so full of these unfamiliar feelings, he took it out solely on you.

And it made you crazy, like completely batshit. You were head over heels for Nolan, had been since the day you met, and when he flipped on you, you didn't know what to do.

no one likes a mad woman. you made her like that.

Nolan was drunk. Anyone in the bar could tell you that. He didn't always handle his alcohol well, either. His eyes locked onto you, all the way down the long table full of people. You were currently talking with some of the media girls, discussing the upcoming Monday video, thinking of question ideas.

Drunk Nolan was mad you weren't paying attention to him. He always wanted your attention, while you were together, and now. He started talking, rather loudly, about you. He was saying how you were crazy, and controlling and that's why you broke up. It was because he was drunk, but that didn't mean it was okay. You heard your name, and your head snapped to the side, staring Nolan down.

"No, she's a crazy bitch! Y'guys are lucky you haven't tried somethin' with'er, she's like the bossiest girlfriend ever. Like, like when we broke up, she was just beggin' me to stay and like wouldn't let me break up with'er!"

You were seeing blood red. None of that was true. You let Nolan do whatever the fuck he wanted during your relationship. He was the possessive one.

and you'll poke the bear, 'til her claws come out.

Most of the table was staring at you, those who weren't were staring at Nolan in bewilderment. No one believed him, they had witnessed your relationship. Some of the guys were telling Nolan to shut the fuck up, knowing you were angry.

You stood up, going to the end of the table Nolan sat at. You stood on the opposite side of the table, between Frank and Nick's seats.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing, Nolan? Do you really need my attention? It's pathetic, to talk about me like this, especially while I'm sitting right fucking there. We get it, you're not as fucking famous as you were here in China, but you don't have to bring me into your attention seeking."

and you find something to wrap your noose around. and there's nothing like a mad woman.

Nolan saw this as an opportunity. He knew he was getting you angry, he was thriving off of it.

"See? She's crazy!"

Adam slapped Nolan over the back of the head, telling him to shut up again, looking at you with wide eyes.

"It's alright Adam, you don't need to stop him from being a bitch. Anyways, Nolan, you calling me crazy is laughable. You were the one that didn't let me wear shit! The one that got mad when I went out with my friends!"

Nolan started to turn into an angry drunk guy. You were saying true things, all of that happened through the duration of your relationship. Nolan was getting embarrassed, again. He look around the table, his eyes catching on the one person likely on his side. A media girl in her junior year at Michigan. In her two years on the team with Nolan as a part of it, she'd had a crush on him, and made it clear to you and him. He turned back to you, ready to say something that would hurt you deep.

now i breathe flames every time i talk. my cannons all firin' at your yacht.

"It's your fault I was like that, I had to worry about you whoring yourself out to everyone."

You could've jumped over the table and strangled him. Frank grabbed your hand under the table, being the sweetheart he was. You squeezed his hand back, thanking him silently. You knew Nolan was embarrassed, and jealous that you were over him, when you obviously occupied his thoughts.

"You have to be kidding me."

they say, "move on." but you know i won't.

"She's not worth it Nolan."

A bitchy little voice came from down the table, every head snapping to look at the girl who'd said it. Of course, it was the one that wanted Nolan down her throat while you two together.

"Alright babe, just because you're feening to get in his pants doesn't mean you're apart of this conversation."

She gasped, many of the people at the table let out laughs, including the other media girls, leading the girl to turn in anger at them and shout out them to stop. You laughed hard, watching her try to blubber out insults at you.

and women like hunting witches too. doing your dirtiest work for you.

"It's obvious that you're both obsessed with me, and I understand, trust me."

They both got angry, starting to let out insults at you, but they were just funny to you.

"You two are gonna be very happy with each other, you can think about me together."

Watching them get angrier and angrier with you was so funny, objectively. You turned to Frank next to you, who was laughing, hard. You mouthed, 'I'm scared' to him, making him laugh harder.

it's obvious that wanting me dead has really brought you two together.

You stepped out from between the chairs, letting Frank's hand go, moving to grab your jacket, wallet, and phone from your spot, walking back to where you were when you gagged Nolan and media girl.

"Well I'm leaving, you two have given me enough entertainment for one night."

You left the bar, giggling to yourself as you pulled out your phone on the walk to your car. You saw one of the girls texted you, reading, 'mr obsessed is going out to see you WALK SLOW ;)' You knew who she meant, Frank. He'd had a little crush on you since he'd joined the team, in age, he was only a little over a year younger than you, so it wasn't weird or anything. You thought he was super cute and he was a lot more thoughtful than Nolan had ever been, even though he wasn't even your boyfriend, you'd never even entertained him, but he was still kind and caring towards you.

i'm taking my time, taking my time, 'cause you took everything from me

You looked behind you, stopping when you saw none other than Frank Nazar jogging up to you, you smiled brightly at him.

"Hi Frank."

He smiled, laughing as he said hi. He told you he wanted to make sure you got to your car safe, of course he did, he was a gentleman. So you let him walk with you, laughing about what had taken place in the bar. When you got to your car, you got in but talked to Frank through your open window for over ten minutes. When you told him he should go back to get out of the freezing weather of Ann Arbor, he nodded and agreed, but didn't leave.

This kid would probably end up being the death of you, with his smile and pretty hair. When you finally got him to head back to the bar, he was physically shivering. You smiled warmly to yourself as you sat in your car for a couple minutes, thinking about the whole night. Seeing Nolan be such a dick confirmed everything you'd thought about him over all the months, so it felt like you were really able to let go. Move on.

watching you climb, watching you climb over people like me. the master of spin has a couple side flings. good wives always know she should be mad, should be scathing like me, but no one likes a mad woman. what a shame she went mad, you made her like that.

[hugshughes]

august T. Zegras

Trevor Zegras x fem!reader

synopsis - You spend an amazing summer with Trevor Zegras, before realizing he was never yours.

wc - 3.3k

contains - NOT EDITED SO THERES PROB A FEWWWW MISTAKES. cursing, angst to fluff in a way, heartbreak, reader gets used, asshole/manipulative!trevor, implied sex (no actual smut), crying, cheating, no happy ending between trevor and reader, but happy ending for reader overall!!!!! not allllll of the song is used like in the actual like lyrics typed out but i just like didn't use some of the repeated verses more than once so yeah. let me know!

an - this hurt. love Trevor but this hurt. and it's honestly pretty short because I really didn't know what else to add so sorry!!!!! but also i kinda like this because i made up a hot man so. i would love new requests, for literally anything with anyone i loveeeeee writing requests but my inbox is literally barren rn.

-

salt air, and the rust on your door. i never needed anything more.

The summer had been perfect. You spent the whole thing in the Outer Banks of North Carolina, with your best friends, and a perfect boy.

You had traveled to the OBX in the middle of June, with your 5 best friends. You guys had rented a house for the summer, you'd been saving for the trips since the end of high school, and you were finally able to go.

You guys spent many days in the sun, getting tan and playing volleyball, swimming in the pool and ocean.

whispers of "are you sure?" "never have i ever before"

On your second week, a group of guys had moved into the house next to yours. One evening while you guys were on the beach they came out and set up next to your group, and one of them had their eyes on you from the get go.

Trevor was something you'd been waiting for for years, a guy that was invested in you, a guy that really liked you and was interested in you.

He would bring you to places you never thought you'd see, places you'd remember your whole life. The blonde would often wake up in your bed, he would smile sweetly and snuggle closer to you, asking for a few more minutes before you guys got up to go to the beach. He took you driving, hiking, you guys would go on runs.

but i can see us lost in the memory. august slipped away into a moment in time, 'cause it was never mine.

You all had to leave on the same weekend, it was the beginning of August, and you were all sad. Before you left, Trevor talked all about how he would miss you, and would call you, and text, and do everything he could to keep contact. You discovered that that wasn't true about two weeks after you guys had left, because his contact faded out then he completely ghosted you.

You were completely heart broken over it. Your friends tried to comfort you, but weren't sure how to. You'd had a whirlwind summer romance, and then abruptly lost it all.

and i can see us twisted in bedsheets, august slipped away like a bottle of wine. 'cause you were never mine.

You had the worst night of your life when your friend showed you a photo Trevor had posted on his Instagram story, which you couldn't see because he had blocked you. It was a picture of him and a girl, with the text reading, "happy 1 year with my favorite!🤍"

You just cried, and cried, and cried. You felt terrible, you had no idea that he was involved with anyone else. He never made an indication that he was cheating with you, he told you flat out he was single the first night you met.

your back beneath the sun, wishin' i could write my name on it. will you call, when you're back at school?

You had dreams of the nights you spent with him. You remember him telling you he'd keep in touch, he would tell you how excited he was for the week you were planned to be in Anaheim in November, since that's where your extended family lived.

Now you were in Anaheim, and all you could think of was Trevor. You sat on the edge of the bed you were sharing with your favorite cousin, sulking as you texted your friends.

"Babe, what's wrong? You've been different since you got here."

You looked up at her, smiling sadly. Quickly you shook your head, turning your phone off and standing up.

"It's nothing, just a long story."

"Well we've got five days, so you better start soon."

You turned and looked at her, and the look she gave you had you spilling it all. You told her every detail, starting July 2nd and ending August 7th, how everything happened after, finding out you were just his side piece while he had a whole girlfriend back home. You cousin was fuming by the end, ranting to you about how he didn't deserve you or your love.

i remember thinkin' i had you. but i can see us, lost in the memory. august slipped away, into a moment in time.

"Hun, it sounds like you need some dick."

You laughed out loud, your hand going to cover her mouth, shushing her quietly. You felt like you were 14 again, whispering to your cool 16 year old cousin about your secret first boyfriend while you slept over at her house.

"Oh my god, shut up! What if my dad heard you? What is grandma heard you?! I would not be let out of the house the rest of this trip."

She giggled as she pulled your hand from her lips, before beginning to beg you to go out with her tonight. She saw the perfect opportunity for you to get out of this house full of old people and little kids, and another to get your mind off of that dickhead.

It took a little bit of convincing, but you finally agreed. Even though you two were 22 and 24, your parents still probably would have a problem with you guys going out so you left the house with sweats over your dresses.

You two sat in the car for a minute, searching for a good bar to drive to. You found one that was only 10 minutes away and started your drive. Your cousin told you that she would have one drink then only water for the rest of the night so you could drink as much as you wanted to.

'cause it was never mine.

You guys found parking a little ways away then walked to the bar. It was crowded when you walked in, surprising to you guys because it was Sunday night.

Your cousin pushed you through the crowd with her hands on your shoulders. You guys finally found a spot open at the bar. She urged you to sit at the one seat while she stood next to you. You flagged down a bartender and ordered your first drink. You sat talking to your cousin for a while before she discovered a group of her local friends there, claiming she'd be gone for just a couple minutes. It'd been almost 30.

You sighed, sadly sipping on your cosmopolitan and checking your phone. You froze when you heard a certain name called through the loud atmosphere of the bar. You turned your head slightly, trying not to make it too obvious, and then you saw him, dapping up another guy you knew, Jamie. Fuck your life. You couldn't fucking believe that out of all the bars in Anaheim he had to be at this one. You turned back around towards the bar, closing your eyes and muttering curse words under your breath.

and i can see us twisted in bedsheets. august slipped away, like a bottle of wine. 'cause you were never mine

"You okay, darlin'?"

Your eyes shot open, looking towards where the unknown voice came from, only to find the owner to be the rather attractive bartender that'd been serving you tonight.

"Oh, uh yeah, thank you it's kind of a long story."

"Well my sections cleared out for now, if you want someone to tell."

You smiled at him, he leaned onto the bar in front of you. He was hot, if you were gonna be honest. He had dark brown hair, brown eyes that looked like honey in the warm lighting of the bar, and a beard that matched his hair. He was sweet, he'd been nice every time he served you. He was also southern, which was so sexy. You had had 2 and a half drinks, so you were a little buzzed, so you were more open to telling him.

"Well before I tell you my sob story, I need to know who I'm telling it to."

He smiled, oh my God his smile was perfect, his teeth were so perfectly straight and white.

"Well I'm Noah, and I'm from Texas, but my dad owns bars out here, like this one. I just work here whenever I'm home because they can always use more hands on deck, but I'm still in school in North Cali."

You started at him the whole time, he just seemed like such a genuine person, and he wasn't hard to look at. You thought the fact that he just worked here whenever he could to help his family was actually so cute.

"That's sweet! You just come here to help your dad?"

He nodded, his smile bringing a light feeling to your chest. You leaned your cheek against your palm, looking to begin your story.

"So Noah, you noticed my reaction to that guy walking in. That reaction was because this summer me and my friends were living in a beach house in the Outer Banks from like the middle of June until August. And so in like July this group of guys started staying at the house next to us and that guy, Trevor, was apart of that group."

Noah nodded, already giving Trevor dirty looks.

"He like was practically my boyfriend for a month and a half, then when he left he ghosted me, and then I see him post his one year anniversary with his girlfriend. One year! Like weren't you sleeping in my bed a month and a half ago?!"

back when we were still changing' for the better. wanting was enough. for me, it was enough. to live for the hope of it all. cancel plans just in case you'd call, and say, "meet me behind the mall."

Noah's jaw had dropped, his eyes wide as he looked between you and Trevor, whom he had a clear view of on the other side of the room.

"That guy fucked you over?"

You nodded sadly, before laughing about it.

"Honestly, I was upset about it but now, seeing him, it's just like he's not the same guy as I thought. He's not really the guy I'm upset about."

"That's real as fuck honestly."

You both laughed at that, you two kept talking for almost thirty more minutes, only breaking your conversation when someone came up for a drink. Your cousin had come over at some point, apologizing for leaving you alone for so long, when you told her you had totally hit it off with the bartender, and she giggled with you before running off when before Noah's smile dropped.

"Not to mention him, but that fuckhead is coming over towards my section."

You rolled your eyes, Trevor didn't make you sad anymore, he just pissed you off. You nodded, taking the drink he'd just made for you from him.

"Hey man, could I get a round of shots?"

He hadn't noticed you, you didn't know if you wanted him to or not. He was literally 5 feet from you, a guy that had seen every inch of you, and he didn't even notice you sitting there. Noah's cheerful demeanor dropped, giving Trevor a look.

"What liquor for how many people?"

"Oh uh um tequila for like 10 people."

"What tequila?"

Noah had known you for an hour and was already hating on your ex-situation like he was his mortal enemy. Trevor told him the brand he wanted and Noah turned to get to work. You kept your eyes on Noah while Trevor looked around aimlessly, until his eyes landed on you.

He was shocked, to say the least. He honestly thought he'd never see you again in his life. He immediately remembered how you told him you were coming to Anaheim for Thanksgiving, and how he told you he couldn't wait to see you then.

so much for summer love,

He liked you, but he also realized that he had a girl at home who still thought they were perfect together. He felt bad when he initially ghosted you, but then he forgot about it within weeks.

He couldn't deny how beautiful you looked, and how seeing you in person brought him right back to July. He wanted to say something, but he didn't know what to say. He had ended the relationship he'd been in just two weeks ago, he felt like seeing you here was a sign. He called your name, two times. The first time you acted like you didn't hear him, then the next you couldn't ignore him.

You turned to him, obviously irritated. You raised your eyebrows at him, a pissed off look on your face.

"What?"

Fuck. Trevor didn't know what to do after that. He stumbled over his words for a few seconds, suddenly nervous.

"Um hey, how are you doing?"

"Are you fucking serious? 'How am I doing?' How can you stand there and ask that after what you did to me?"

"Fuck, let's just talk, okay? I'll explain everything to you baby. Please?"

The name made you want to punch him in the nose. If you were being honest, you wanted to hear whatever explanation he had for it all. But no way in Hell were you gonna forgive him for any of it. You were done, this was just the closure you had needed for all those months.

and saying "us".

"Okay number one, don't fucking call me that; and number two, I will listen to you, but I'm not listening for your benefit, or to forgive you, I'm listening for the closure I need from you. Okay?"

"Yeah fine, sorry. Okay just come on so we can go somewhere more private."

You thought about it for a second, looking towards Noah behind the bar, secretly listening to the whole conversation. You made eye contact with him, mouthing, 'I'll be right back.' To which he nodded.

Trevor caught the interaction, which made his insides twist in anger. But he had no right to be angry, not one part of you belonged to him. You followed Trevor to the hallway by the bathrooms, leaning against the wall while he stood in front of you, far enough away so that you were comfortable.

"So I know what I did was terrible. It was a shit thing to do, but I had a lot of stuff happening at home and-"

"'Stuff' as in a long term girlfriend? Trevor you cheated on someone with me. You acted like you cared about me, ghosted me, then I have to find out I wasn't even the only girl, and that I was the other woman! That makes me a bad person! I felt like such shit for months because of you, and I shouldn't have, because it's all your fault! Not mine, not your girlfriend's, yours."

'cause you weren't mine to lose.

Holy shit. How the fuck did you know about Trevor's girlfriend? He had you blocked on his phone and his girlfriend's.

"Fuck um how do you even- Fuck just I know how bad that sounds okay? But you have to understand that-"

you weren't mine to lose, no.

"I don't think I'm gonna understand anything that comes out of your mouth. Just, leave me alone Trevor, you have had fucked me up enough as is."

Trevor leaned against the wall opposite from you with his head low, defeated. You felt a weight lifted from your shoulders, maybe all the closure you needed was to yell at him good and hard.

"Have a good fucking life, Trevor."

'cause you were never mine, never mine.

With your last goodbye, you sped away from him, before any more bullshit could leave his lips. He was never yours. You understood that now, and honestly it's a good thing he never was, because he was a fucking mess. You hoped he'd find a girl that fixed him, someone that could help him learn peace. But you knew you weren't her, you weren't a girl interested in making a man out of a boy, you wanted a man and that was that.

You walked back to where you sat at the bar, seeing Noah cleaning up the bar top. He looked up and saw you, smiling lightly.

"Hey, are you good?"

You nodded standing next to your seat and smiling back at him.

"So much better, to be honest. I just shouted at him and I think that was my version of closure."

"So you don't think he's coming to get these shots?"

You both laughed as you shook your head at him. You talked for about ten more minutes, before you decided it was time to find your cousin and go home. Noah asked for your number, which you happily gave him. You and your cousin exited the bar, both with smiles, though yours was a bit bigger.

"So you had a good night babe?"

"Very good, actually. That hot ass bartender was like the sweetest guy ever and asked for my number!"

You and your cousin talked the whole drive home as you both described the details of your nights. When you got home, you both slid your sweats back on over your dresses and quietly walked into your grandparent's home, informing your parents of your pre-prepared alibi, saying how you went and saw the Taylor Swift movie, then got dinner.

You both giggled like little girls while you ran up the stairs, then giggled even more ten minutes later in your shared bed when Noah texted you.

Trevor knew that he fully lost you when you walked away from him, but it didn't stop him from unblocking you and scrolling through your instagram.

but do you remember?

4 years later Trevor was single and still playing for the Ducks, he saw a picture from the summer of '23 and you came to his mind. He wondered what you were up to. He wanted to know if you were near Anaheim or anything. He pulled up Instagram, searching your name. What he found shocked him.

When Noah asked you to marry him three years into your relationship it was the easiest decision you had ever made. He was perfect, your dream boy. Then when you married him a year after that, it was easily the best day of your life. Your wedding in the hills of Northern California was absolutely gorgeous, and your honeymoon in Greece was breathtaking.

remember when i pulled up and said, "get in the car!" and then canceled my plans just in case you'd call?

Trevor saw the photos you posted from your wedding two weeks earlier and his jaw dropped, he recognized your husband as the bartender from the night the last time he ever saw you. You looked perfect in your white dress, the caption reading, "Mr & Mrs Moore, 7-29-27." Trevor was truly shocked, he didn't know why though. You were a perfect girl, and it was no surprise someone had lucked out and married you.

back when i was livin' for the hope of it all, for the hope of it all.

He liked the post, accidentally. When you saw the notification, you were confused, but smiled. You hadn't thought of Trevor in years, and now your time with him was all memories. He had made you happy in the moment, and you being sad and moping about him was what led your cousin to taking you to the bar, where you'd met the love of your life, your husband, the man who'd eventually be the father to all of your children.

You were grateful for Trevor Zegras, just for that.

for the hope of it all. for the hope of it all. (for the hope of it all.) (for the hope of it all.)

[hugshughes]

exile D. Duke

Dylan Duke x ex!fem!reader JJ McCarthy x fem!reader (couldn’t help myself)

synopsis - when you and Dylan see each other for the first time after your breakup, and you have a new boyfriend doting on you, he’s upset. he finds a way to get you alone and interrogates you on how you could already move on from him.

wc - 2k

contains - UNEDITED!!! cursing, shouting, unrequited feelings, miscommunication, Dylan and reader are mean, asshole!Dylan a little (im sorry munchkin), no happy ending between Dylan and reader, happy ending between JJ and reader though ;), JJ McCarthy is reader’s new boyfriend (i did that for me), hypocrisy (?), flashback is in italics, as always lmk!!!!

an - this was probably the easiest and quickest for me to write so far, exile is a pretty short song lyrics wise and it just speaks to me. i love this one a lot, so i hope you do too! JJ McCarthy is just my fav boy so you know i jumped at the opportunity to have him in this. ummmmm yeah lmk how you like it! also yeah i know i skipped tlgad but that fic is slowlyyyyyyyy coming together, it’s just a littleeee more difficult. celebration masterlist

-

i see you standing, honey. with his arms around your body. laughing but the joke’s not funny at all.

It was the first party of the school year. Dylan doesn’t know why he thought you wouldn’t be there, of course you would be. But he really didn’t think he’d walk through the fraternity house to see you standing in a circle in the kitchen, back pressed up against the starting quarterback, his arms around your waist.

When Mark looked over and saw what Dylan was staring at, he almost laughed. Not because he’s a bad friend or anything, just the look on Dylan’s face was laughable. He didn’t laugh though, he sighed and brought a heavy hand to pat his friend on the back, not saying anything.

Dylan’s eye could’ve twitched when he saw your head fall back on JJ’s shoulder, your laughter like honey in Dylan’s ears. How could you laugh like that? JJ hadn’t even said anything that funny, in Dylan’s opinion.

and it took you five whole minutes, to pack us up and leave me with it. holdin’ all this love out here in the hall.

Dylan was getting more agitated every time he saw you, because every time he saw you, JJ was on your tail, following you around like a lost puppy with hearts in his eyes.

He wondered how long you two had been a thing, if you had even waited two weeks before jumping to a new guy. He knew in a deep and closed off part of his heart you wouldn’t do that, he knew you probably hadn’t gotten together till late summer.

When you broke up with Dylan, he was blindsided. He was so surprised, he never saw it coming. He didn’t realize how much he’d been taking and not giving, and how drained you were becoming because of it.

i think i’ve seen this film before, and i didn’t like the ending. you’re not my homeland anymore. so what am i defending now? you were my town, now i’m in exile seeing you out. i think i’ve seen this film before.

He decided his night was ruined. He sat moping in the corner where his friends hunkered down at the party, gripping the glass bottle in his hand while his friends all tried to cheer him up.

“Dude, you can’t let her just being here with JJ get you all fucked up.”

He groaned, rolling his eyes at Ethan. He stood up pushing past them, storming off to the kitchen, searching for another beer. That’s when he came face to face with you, all alone, in an empty kitchen.

i can see you starin’ honey. like he’s just your understudy, like you’d get your knuckles bloody for me.

You noticed Dylan after you’d felt his eyes staring into the side of your head. Every where you went, he was there, staring daggers into you, into JJ. You’d met JJ in mid July, you’d both been vacationing at the same lake and knew of each other.

He was with his friends, while you were with your family. You were sitting at the dock while your parents and siblings were kayaking when JJ came up to you.

You heard a call of your name. You looked up from the book you were reading and saw someone you didn’t think you’d see for another two months, JJ McCarthy.

“Um, hi?”

You’d never really talked to him, maybe a hey in passing at a party but nothing more. You were mutuals on instagram but knew practically nothing about him.

“Hey, you remember me?”

You nodded, laughing at him. He started a conversation with you, sitting down next to you and asking about your summer. You’d talked for awhile, after about 25 minutes he asked if you wanted to come jet skiing with him and his friends. You were surprised, this guy that you’d never really talked to had taken such an interest in you out of nowhere.

You were reluctant but accepted his offer after he promised he wouldn’t let you get thrown off. You sat behind him on the jet ski and initially just gripped the straps on the back of his life jacket, but once the waves started getting rougher you wrapped your arms around him tightly, burying your head in his back.

After about an hour you went back in, you family had just finished up kayaking when JJ parked the jet ski.

“Um, I have a question, but I don’t know how you’ll react.”

Your brows furrowed, he seemed nervous for the first time in the two hours you’d spent with him. You nodded at him, telling him to go on.

“Are you uh, are you still with Duke?”

Your eyes widened as you inhaled sharply. You were quick to shake your head no.

“No! No um, no we broke up in April.”

He nodded, thinking for a beat.

“Then would it maybe be possible for me to get your number?”

And then you spent the rest of your summer getting to know JJ. Learning about his character and loving nature.

He asked you to be his girlfriend on August 11th, about a month after you’d initially given him your number, it was quick, but you’d felt like you’d known him forever.

Tonight JJ obviously noticed Dylan. He noticed the way Dylan stared at you all night. He found it amusing. JJ was clingy, very touchy, and sweet and you loved it. Since JJ saw Dylan, he decided to exaggerate his usual advances even more so. Kissing you frequently, always having his hands on you in some way, holding you against him, having you sit on his lap.

You went to the bathroom and on your way back almost knocked into none other than Dylan. You said hey courteously and it pissed Dylan off.

“Yeah hey, having fun with JJ?”

He said it in a sarcastic tone, exaggerating the word fun, like you were just with JJ for “fun” as in sex. You knew that was what Dylan was insinuating.

“Okay fuck you, you don’t get to say that.”

“I don’t? I don’t get to comment on the guy you got with after you dumped me?”

You were seeing red, you wouldn’t be surprised if steam was coming from your ears.

second, third, hundredth chance. balancin’ on breaking branches. those eyes add insult to injury.

“No, you don’t! And I didn’t dump you! I ended a relationship that had already fucking fallen apart!”

“What do you fucking mean?! ‘Fallen apart’? We were fine! We were good!”

“No, you were great Dylan! You were having an awesome time! I wasn’t! Everything I did was for you and I got nothing in return for it!”

Dylan stopped, staring at you. He never understood that you were not doing well at the end of your relationship, he was so happy, which must’ve meant you were too.

i think i’ve seen this film before, and i didn’t like the ending. i’m not your problem anymore, so who am i offending now? you were my crown, now i’m in exile, seein’ you out.

“What Dylan? What? You don’t get to just stare at me like that. Like- like you didn’t realize how fucking miserable I was.”

“I fucking made you miserable? You could’ve fucking mentioned that maybe!”

“You don’t get it! You didn’t make me miserable, I just fucking was! And you just didn’t know, you didn’t realize. Why the fuck do you even care anyway? We’ve been done for almost six months!”

Dylan maneuvered around you, grabbing another beer.

“Maybe ‘cause you broke up with me with no explanation! I still don’t fucking understand what your problem was!”

i think i’ve seen this film before, so i’m leaving out the side door. so step right out, there is no amount of crying i can do for you. all this time.

“Exactly! You didn’t fucking pay attention to me! You assumed that because you were happy that I was, and I wasn’t! I had so much shit happening to me and you never considered it!”

we always walked a very thin line you didn’t even hear me out (you didn’t even hear me out) you never gave a warning sign (i gave so many signs) all this time.

“You just shut me out out of no where! It wasn’t fucking fair to me!”

You and Dylan had never fought before the one that happened when you broke up with him, never. Now, you believe that it was because you two were never completely comfortable with each other. You felt like you had to be your best self for him, not your real self.

“I gave you so many indications that I wasn’t alright, that I needed you in a different way!”

“‘Indications?’ I can’t read your fucking mind, you should’ve just said something!”

i never learned to read your mind. (never learned to read my mind) i couldn’t turn things around. (you never turned things around) ‘cause you never gave a warning sign (i gave so many signs) so many signs, so many signs. you didn’t even see the signs.

“You know what? I’m not doing this shit, because, well I don’t have to anymore. Leave me alone Dylan, there’s nothing that anyone could do or say for us to be together again. We weren’t right for each other.”

And with that you stormed out of the kitchen seeking solace in JJ and your friends.

Dylan stood in the empty kitchen. Thinking over every word. He shouted out a curse word.

i think i’ve seen this film before, and i didn’t like the ending. you’re not my homeland anymore. so what am i defending now? you were my town, now i’m in exile seeing you out. i think i’ve seen this film before. so i’m leavin’ out the side door.

Dylan exited the fraternity, sitting down on the steps out of the back door. You and him had sat in that exact spot before, only then you two were snuggling, leaving lingering kisses on cheeks and foreheads, whispering sweet nothings.

JJ had immediately noticed your change in behavior when you came back and sat on his lap, grabbing his arm and wrapping it around you.

“What’s wrong gorgeous?” He whispered to you, knowing you wouldn’t want attentioned called to you.

“Ran into Dylan. Doesn’t matter though, don’t worry baby.” You murmured back to him, squeezing his hand, kissing his cheek.

“If you say so, but you know I’d beat him up for you if you asked.” You nodded and chuckled, he left a kiss on the top of your head, holding you tighter.

so step right out, there is no amount of crying i can do for you. all this time. we always walked a very thin line you didn’t even hear me out (you didn’t even hear me out) you never gave a warning sign (i gave so many signs) all this time. i never learned to read your mind. (never learned to read my mind) i couldn’t turn things around. (you never turned things around) ‘cause you never gave a warning sign (i gave so many signs) so many signs, so many signs. you didn’t even see the signs.

[hugshughes]

cardigan J. Drysdale

Jamie Drysdale x fem!reader

synopsis - when you and jamie get married you can’t help but look back on every single memory, good and bad, that led you two to this moment.

wc - 2.5k

contains - honestly mostly fluffy, some angst flashbacks but it’s a cute fic mostly, cursing, shouting, kissing, oh reader has a sister who is her maid of honor, i think that’s it (as always lmk!!)

an - i was about to post this yesterday but i fell asleep sorry lol. i’ve had this practically done for like a week but i kept thinking it wasn’t good enough. im actually really excited for this one! i might’ve not made Jamie and bad as James is but we all know Jamie would never do anything like James so. i love the folklore triangle SO SO MUCH (betty especially my favorite) so this one was so fun to write! i hope you love it!

-

Today was the best day of your life, your wedding day. You married your best friend since 8th grade, Jamie. You were finally Mrs. Drysdale, Jamie had been waiting for this moment since he realized he was going to marry you in his senior year of high school.

The ceremony was absolutely gorgeous, Jamie cried during your first look and then again when you came down the aisle. He looked perfect, a navy blue suit matching the color of the ribbon on your bridesmaid's bouquets. Trevor was tearing up next to his best friend as you came down the aisle, his grey suit matching with the groomsmen.

Now Trevor’s suit jacket is long gone, thrown over his chair as he dances to an old 90s song in the middle of your reception hall. He had created a dance circle and brought most of your guests, even the elderly, into it. That was also where your husband was dragged to at the moment. Now you were sitting at your dinner seat, looking through the gift your sister gave you as she sat next to you.

Your sister had been your best friend since you were born, her being 3 years older than you. Now, she held your hand as you teared up turning the page of the photo book she’d made you.

vintage tee, brand new phone. high heels on cobblestones. when you are young they assume you know nothing.

The first picture there ever was of you and Jamie, sitting next to each other on your parents’ old couch, his arm wrapped cautiously around you at your 14th birthday party, when he was still just your friend boy. He’d gotten you a new shirt. Well, it was not new, but it was a thrifted vintage shirt you’d been looking for for months.

You’d also gotten a new iPhone 7, amazing at the time. It was a phone you texted Jamie on every night before bed, when during the school year you’d have to leave it on the counter of your kitchen till the next morning. It was crazy to think that those 2 little babies were married now.

sequin smile, black lipstick. sensual politics. when you are young they assume you know nothing.

You laughed at a different picture, remembering when you were almost 16, thinking you were hot shit with your dark lipstick at homecoming. Your beautiful boyfriend of over a year with his shining smile wrapped around your side.

You guys had shocked most when at 17 they asked how long you’d been together, and you guys answered with 2+ years. You guys were so young for how long you were committed to each other.

but i knew you, dancin’ in your Levi’s. drunk under a street light, i. i knew you.

You flipped a few pages, seeing a photo of you and Jamie (taken by your sister), slow dancing in the kitchen, him just in his jeans, bare back muscles on display in the photo. Another photo, you and Jamie, holding hands and running down the sidewalk of Anaheim, both quite tipsy as Trevor filmed you two, being the DD. It all was so surreal. You’re married, to Jamie, the boy you’d loved since forever.

hand under my sweatshirt. baby, kiss it better, i. and when i felt like i was an old cardigan, under someone’s bed. you put me on and said i was your favorite.

A picture of the night you and Jamie got back together. You had broken up for all of 2 and a half weeks when you were both 18. After almost 4 years of being together, it was overwhelming to think of him moving to Anaheim, so far from you.

He came to your place the night before he left, pleading with you to just try and make it work. It didn’t take much begging from him, you were always gonna be his. The way he made you feel, was like no other. His most special girl, as Jamie would put it.

The picture was a snap you’d sent to your sister, a selfie of you and Jamie both crying but laughing, with a caption “guess who’s fav couple is #backtogether!!!!” Your sister loved the photo so much, one of her favorites.

a friend to all is a friend to none. chase two girls, lose the one. when you are young they assume you know nothing.

A picture of you two when you were 16, he’d just won a game with his junior team and your moms needed a picture of you two together when he got off the ice. He’s still in all of his gear, you’re in one of his sweatshirts that had his name and number on the chest. His arm is around your waist, you’re both smiling from ear to ear with rosy cheeks. You remember that night, it was your first argument.

There were some girls, presumably player’s sisters, who were waiting around the locker room at the end of the game. Jamie was the first boy to come out of the lockers, and the girls decided to try and sink their teeth into him.

Jamie was trying to get them off of him, all he wanted was to see you. When you finally came over to the locker rooms, all you saw was Jamie with his back to you, and two girls rubbing his arms with big smiles on their faces, telling him how amazing he played.

If Jamie’s back hadn’t been turned from you, you would’ve seen his uncomfortable and upset face, and him telling them to get off of him. But you didn’t see that, what you did see broke your little 16-year-old heart.

You knew in the back of your head you probably should’ve waited to see what his reaction was but you couldn’t fight the ache in your chest when you saw it. You practically ran out to the car, texting your mom that you didn’t feel well and wanted to go home before your planned dinner with the Drysdale’s.

You got a few questions from your parents, but you just told them you felt sick. And you did, to be fair, just not in the way they assumed. Jamie texted, his parents told him how you felt sick and he was concerned. Your answers to his texts concerned him more though, you were being vague, a little mean, even. You’d avoided Jamie for almost a week before he came over when he knew you’d be home and questioned you.

His first thought was that you were really sick, but he also knew how you got when you were sick. If you were sick you always wanted Jamie however you could have him, in person, over text, on Facetime, anything. He knew it was something else. His suspicions were proven correct when he barged into your room, and you were lying on your bed texting, perfectly well.

He argued with you a little bit, just upset that you were telling him you were sick to not see him. He was almost embarrassed about it. When the truth finally came out, Jamie immediately softened, feeling bad that you thought he would give any girl other than you the time of day. When he told you what really happened, you felt so stupid. You apologized over and over. Jamie assured you he understood, but asked you to please tell him if something was ever bothering you.

but i knew you. playing hide-and-seek and giving me your weekends, i i knew you, heartbeat on the high line once in twenty lifetimes, i. and when i felt like i was an old cardigan, under someone’s bed. you put me on and said i was your favorite.

You were Jamie’s sanctuary, his place of peace when his world was upside down. Because of how long you’d known each other, you both could be kids again while together. Your moms bet that you would get married the minute they both found out you were dating. At 14, they both knew that you two were forever. They could see the soulmate connection you two have.

You made each other feel new, while also reminding each other of the good in the past. You came to every Otters game, then when he was drafted almost every Ducks game. Your parents weren’t skeptical even for a second when you said you were going to move to Anaheim and go to school there. They knew Jamie had you, and that you were in good hands.

to kiss in cars and downtown bars, was all we needed. you drew stars around my scars, but now i’m bleedin’.

Jamie had been there through everything. Every panic attack, every bad day, every fight with your parents. He was always there to hold you and whisper sweet nothings to you. He never expected anything from you except for your love, and that wasn’t a hard ask.

Jamie was the most loving and lovable person in the world. He knew what to say and when to say it. He was always able to make everything better, he was everything everywhere all the time.

cause i knew you, steppin’ on the last train. marked me like a bloodstain, i. i knew you. tried to change to the ending, Peter losing Wendy, i. i knew you. leavin’ like a father, runnng like water, i. and when you are young they assume you know nothing.

During those few months when you couldn’t tell what the future of your relationship looked like you were so scared. Pretty much everything you’d done in the past year or so had been for Jamie. Finding a school near Anaheim, moving across the country to Anaheim, trying to be the most supportive girlfriend you could.

Jamie was unlike himself for those months. You were scared the NHL would have forever changed the boy you fell in love with. He was just, different. You couldn’t tell if he was just getting older or if he felt like he had to act older to be respected in the league.

The night Jamie found you broken down is the night he realized he had almost ruined the one consistently good thing he had. He has apologized for weeks after, he felt so terrible and it made you feel even worse, seeing him tearing himself up over something you were past.

but i knew you’d linger like a tattoo kiss. i knew you’d haunt all of my what-ifs. the smell of smoke would hang around this long, ‘cause i knew everything when i was young. i knew i’d curse you for the longest time. chasin’ shadows in the grocery line. i knew you’d miss me once the thrill expired, and you’d be standin’ in my front porch light.

You knew no matter what happened to your relationship he would always be “the 1”. He had been your everything since you were 14 years old, there was no way you could ever get over him.

Jamie had realized his mistake of putting you on the back burner a few weeks before he was able to admit it. He had had a bad game, like really bad. He had multiple penalties, hadn’t done a great job leading the defense, or assisting the offense.

After the game, he was pissed with himself, but his best friend came over to him, patting him on the back and saying “Go home and relax. You’ve been so tense lately. Go be with your girl and chill, you definitely need it.”

It confused him, all season he’d been working harder and harder than ever before, and he assumed when all that work wasn’t helping, he had to push himself even more. He never realized that his best successes came from when he was relaxed when he had been talking to you before, when he could see you in the crowd.

You had come to as many games as you could all season. But one night, after a fight over God knows what, Jamie told you not to bother coming to his game the next night, and you hadn’t gone since.

Jamie had questioned his love for hockey at times during his rookie season. He’d even thought about what his life would look like without it. He never had to question one thing though, that you’d be there no matter what he did. He’d thought about his future, always just knowing you were gonna be there.

Jamie realized that you weren’t always gonna be there if he didn’t care for you like he should. He realized you could probably find another guy who would bend over backward to do everything you ever wanted for you. He realized he had to start doing that again, because you’d done everything for him in the past year, and never asked for anything in return.

and i knew you’d come back to me. you’d come back to me. and you’d come back to me. you’d come back.

You didn’t realize tears were running down your face until your sister wiped them away, tilting your head up to look at her. She then nodded to the side, and you followed her gaze, seeing your husband standing next to you. Your husband. His smile drops when he sees your tears.

“Hey woah baby, are you alright?”

You sniff and nod, laughing at yourself.

“Yes, just my stupid sister made me cry with her present.”

He laughed and shook his head at your sister, saying something about not making the most important girl of the night cry. Your sister stood up from her seat, going to pick up your niece who had fallen asleep at one of the tables. You turned back to Jamie after your sister had left, smiling at him with glossy eyes.

“You tired pretty?”

“A bit, but I guess I could dance with you a little more. At the end of the day, you are my husband.”

He nodded at you with amusement, letting out an “oh yeah?” and grabbing your hand to pull you from your seat, smashing his lips into yours. You held his face while he held your waist. You got a few whoops from your wedding party, calling you over to the dance floor, a Taylor Swift song had just come on, and Trevor was about to go crazy.

When you pulled away from each other, you both had the most lovesick smiles on your faces, intertwining hands and running over to the dance floor, jumping around with the people you loved most, shouting the lyrics to Cruel Summer.

Jamie was always gonna be yours, no matter what happened.

and when i felt like i was an old cardigan, under someone’s bed. you put me on and said i was your favorite.

-

i’m making a taglist for this if anyone would like that! comment or send an ask if you’re interested!

[hugshughes]

⭑folklore⭑ hugshughes’ 100 followers celly!

i hit 100 followers so i wanted to do a little fic celebration!

thank you so much for 100 followers!! im so grateful for all of y’all! and i am definitely working on the couple requests i have received and would love more but i am focusing on this at the moment!

this is gonna be fulllll of fluff, angst, smut (maybe idk) and i’m so excited! i’ve seen people do like speak now and other tay albums but i’ve never seen a folklore one so i’m excited for this!

favs - ⭑

MASTERLIST -

the 1 - Adam Fantilli ⭑

cardigan - Jamie Drysdale

the last great american dynasty - Hughes!Sister

exile - Dylan Duke

my tears ricochet - Rutger McGroarty ⭑

mirrorball - Mark Estapa ⭑

seven - Ethan Edwards ⭑

august - Trevor Zegras

this is me trying - Luca Fantilli ⭑

illicit affairs - Jack Hughes

invisible string - Luke Hughes ⭑

mad woman - Nolan Moyle

epiphany - Nico Hischier

betty - Connor Bedard

peace - Quinn Hughes

hoax - Mathew Barzal

the lakes (bonus track) - Cole Caufield

-

i’m soooo excited to write these oh also! i reallyiked the idea of hughes!sister for tlgad but i’m DEF not opposed to adding a love interest if someone i like is requested or mentioned!!!

i am hoping to release these throughout the rest of august and september maybe even october if it takes that long but i think it’ll probably just stretch through september, THIS IS DEF GOING UNTIL PROBABLY NOVEMBER OR DECEMBER IM SORRY and i hope u guys are excited for this! THANK YOU FOR 100!!!!🤍

[hugshughes]

nav 'n intro

hi, i'm Lei or Leila!

my main blog (since tumblr is a bitch) is @hugshughesy ! so any notifications u get from that account are from me!

requests are open!! i accept requests (fluff, angst, smut, you name it!) for anyone on this list and even other guys that might not be on there, just ask!

masterlist + includes who i write for!

my 100 follower folklore celebration!

recent - Liquid Courage / JJ McCarthy

upcoming! - Sidelines (Luke Hughes) - Forever (Jack Hughes) - His Jersey (Blake Corum) - Work Song (Alexander Holtz)

[hugshughes]

if you guys have read my author’s notes you’ve read about me stressing to find a love interest for betty because it’s my fav on folklore and i can’t just let any man have it. so help.

[hugshughes]

me when ive released 1 of 17 fics for my folklore celebration but im already planning my zach bryan album celebration for my next celebration🧍‍♀️

[hugshughes]

heyyyyyy to all my folklore celly fans...

im sorry i ghosted u guys

epiphany with nico hischier coming TODAY.