#hux.txt

[iridescentdecays]

seeing that hockey art from @effigyofxeno decided it for me (hope it’s okay i tagged you, lmao). i’m making this poll

*the white hat au is a planned upcoming au where dylan is a white hat at clb and eric works in the theater w mrs. c.

**ik he was way too lanky to play football but i wanted to provide it as an option anyway. i think in an au like this he would’ve put on more muscle, although idk if that still would’ve made it possible for him to play the sport just due to his build, but w/e

[antigibborim-blog]

anyway, if anyone wants to talk about postknight, im listening.

[cloakandfang]

this is a callout for kylo ren. you’re a bitch and a hoe and i almost hate that i’m attracted to you. almost.

[kinthetiiic]

father’s day more like father’s nay amiright

[asstro-boy-moved]

I SAW A COCK AND YELLED "CHICKEN" AND CHASED IT WITH MY ARMS OUT LIKE A BIRD AND I DIDNT REALIZE THIS COUPLE WAS THERE AND THEY SAW ME AND I WANNA DIE

[ccorinthian]

Don’t tell anyone but kylo ren is a homestuck

he’s got two gamzee posters in his room

[iridescentdecays]

since i'm getting new followers i thought i'd make an intro post since that's how things seem to be done these days on tumblr dot com:

my name is laurie, hux, or reb -- i'll answer to any or all of the above. i'm 31. i'm a writer first and foremost: my ao3 is here. i'm also here on reddit where i mostly post borderline nice things about the you know what case but i keep it lowkey so i don't get banned from the subs, lmao

my main tumblr account is saltmouths. i follow back from there but i don't think it shows up; i've been shadowbanned pretty much since i made the account and i've reached out to support about it at least four times with zero response. i mention this because i don't want anyone to think i'm just ignoring you; if i follow back there isn't a notification, and i cannot reply to anyone's posts from either my main or this sideblog. i also can't send asks, even anonymously. it's too much effort to remake again but it does make using the site a pain in the ass, since i've been on tumblr since 2011 and remember when i used to be able to just. y'know. use it like a normal person

i'm very into the you know what case but i probably won't ever actually post about it or reblog stuff about it (except for when i post short fics) because i'm burned out from staff being up my ass and i just wanna stay low key as much as possible. please feel free to dm me or send me asks on this blog, though; i'm always happy to talk about stuff! (i can't dm from or receive asks on saltmouths.)

[antigibborim-blog]

hey @velafis why is fystome such a gay little man who can't swim

[cloakandfang]

I did not intend to go into a Hux shift today. This is interesting. I would like to speak to Kylo, however... I have not found him. This is a disappointment.

[antigibborim-blog]

my aunt got me free bagels from the senior center hell yeah

[pretty-boy-blood-blog]

[cloakandfang]

This is just a little memory dump for Hux. If anyone wants to read it, just be warned there’s a lot of swearing and a very Angery General(tm)

“There is no goddamn reason we shouldn’t have that droid by now!” I yelled, slamming my hand down on the table. “Send squadron seven and nine out. I’m tired of this, gentlemen, and if we don’t get that stupid little droid by the end of tomorrow, I don’t know what I’m going to do.”

“Yes sir,” the table chorused.

“...dismissed.” I sighed, turning away and rubbing my temples. You’d think getting a droid wouldn’t be that damn hard for the best trained troopers in this part of the galaxy.

“I see you’re still struggling with such a simple task, general.”

“Fuck off, Ren,” I growled, stalking back to the command center.

“With such a prestigious man as yourself, I’d expect that the droid would already be here.”

“Well I’m sorry, your highness, things don’t always work out the way we want them to!”

“Watch your words, Hux. I won’t-” The commander was cut off by an alarm sounding, red lights beginning to flash.

“What the hell is it now?”

“Unauthorized ship, sir. It appears the prisoner from cell 7 and one of our own is taking off.”

“Well what are you planning on doing? Stop them!” I shouted, clenching my fists. “Laser cannons, set. Aim all artillery on that ship. We aren’t letting them go. DO YOU HEAR ME?!” Crashes and gunfire rang out below the deck, and I watched as the ship took off from the hangar. With a frustrated shout, I sprinted off towards the hangar stairs.

“Sir?!”

“FIRE AT THEM WITH ALL WE’VE GOT!” Running towards a ship and startling a few troopers, I leapt up and scrambled into the cockpit. Quickly powering up, the machine hummed and powered out of the hangar. “Like hell you’re getting away from us…” I muttered, pressing a few buttons and engaging maneuvering thrusters. The ship blasted off and quickly turned a corner, the stolen ship now in sight. It looked as if someone had a few drinks before taking off, or didn’t know what the hell they were doing.

“Lock target...and.. fire!” Missiles flew out from my ship, spiralling towards the runaways.

“Hux!” I flinched, causing the craft to waver and nearly crash.

“What the hell?!”

“You are to return immediately. Get back here.”

“Ren, I am doing no such thing. You all aren’t doing shit at the bridge, so I’ve got to do it myself!” Recovering from the startled lurch, I was beginning to gain on them. So close, and I could just…

“Hux.” I flinched again, this time the ship halting in it’s tracks.

“Will you fucking stop?” I growled, gripping the joysticks. I watched helplessly as the ship made it’s way away, stray rounds from our base following after it. Shaking, I let out a slow, stressed breath. I sat, floating in space for a few minutes. The escapees were now out of sight, long gone. “Son of a bitch,” I muttered to myself, slowly turning around and returning to the hangar.

I stalked through the corridors of the base, answering to a summons. Summons my ass, more like the whiny call of a lowlife. I entered a conference room, staring quietly at the dark figure that stood within.

“General.”

“Ren.”

“Why did you take off on the flip of a coin, just like that?” I shrugged rather nonchalantly.

“No one else was going to. Why did you stop me?”

“We need them alive, General.”

“For what?”

“...I just have a feeling. I know we need them, alive. You were going to kill them.”

“Well hell, if you have a feeling, then call everything off! God forbid if we don’t follow Lord Kylo Ren’s feelings!” Silence. “Aw, what, is the little baby upset?” I sneered. Ren stood silent for a moment, then turned towards me, taking his mask off and setting it on the table.

“General, I advise that you listen to me.”

“Oh, why is that? Are you gonna-” Abruptly, my breath was cut off. God, fuck. This son of a bitch-

“Don’t question me, Hux. You’ll come to regret it.” Ren growled, slowly stepping towards my position. One thing I hated about him was his tendency to use the Force. Truthfully, it was the one thing that was able to subdue me, and he knew it. Hell, if I could move, I’d be trembling. He stood unbelievably close to me, staring me dead in the eyes. “Do you understand me?”

Through gritted teeth, I managed, “I understand.”

“Good,” he released his invisible grip on me, and I tried my best to keep my composure, taking slow, deep breaths rather than quick, short ones. He remained just a few inches from me, looking down upon me as if to be intimidating. “Anything you’d like to say?”

“...No.”

“No…?”

I groaned internally. “No sir.” Ren and his fucking god complex. Hated him.

[kinthetiiic]

Kylo used to do this thing where he'd like. Idk. Used the Force to get rid of my stress headaches or something? I quite honestly have no idea what he did but they always went away.

[ccorinthian]

honestly one of the few kin memories i actually have is kylo leaning on me and calling me “short” and i am still angry about it

[antigibborim-blog]

what the shit do you do on peach??