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#hyungseo fic
slytherinshua · 3 months
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SHUT UP, BRAIN
genre. hurt/comfort. warnings. kevin has some thoughts and insomnia. pairing. kevin x reader. wc. 745. request. no. a/n. i love him so much he deserves the world hes so sweet and perfect :(
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When you stirred from sleep from the unmistakable chill and loud rustling in the room followed by a hushed curse, you knew Kevin had struggled to fall asleep again. You were exhausted, but you knew it was probably even worse for him. He never seemed to show how tired he was, but you could sometimes see it in his eyes, especially when the lack of sleep built up over time.
You forced your eyes open, pulling the blanket closer over your body to help with the shivers. Without Kevin’s body warmth, you always felt a constant chill, no matter how many blankets you piled on top of your body. It just wasn’t the same as being wrapped up in his arms.
“Kevin.” You called out, rolling to the other side of the bed to locate where he was in the room.
“Hm?” He answered immediately, turning around to meet your tired eyes. This same routine had happened so often that he had learned to not feel bad about waking you up because he couldn’t sleep. You really didn’t mind, you just wanted him back in bed cuddled up next to you.
“Cold.” That was all you could muster out in a tired whisper. Thankfully, it was all Kevin needed to know that you wanted him back under the covers. He shuffled over sheepishly as you opened up the blanket for him to crawl under with you.
You sighed as soon as you were able to wrap your arms around his body and could feel the warmth that washed over you almost immediately. You rested your head back on the pillow and watched Kevin’s eyes drift to the ceiling, blinking several times, but never falling down to look at you.
“You thinking about something?” You asked quietly.
You heard him sigh. He took a while to respond, but you didn’t rush him. You focused on the little skin exposed on his chest from his pyjama top, drawing little circles on the spot to relax him.
“Just… us, I guess. Thinking about everything, but mostly just you… and me.” His eyes flickered to you for a split second before settling back on the ceiling. 
“What about us?” 
“Are you tired of this?” The question was filled with worry, and you knew that ‘this’ referred to more than just what your mind immediately jumped to.
“No. Are you?” 
“No… but I still feel bad.”
You understood what he was feeling. It was almost impossible not to feel some frustration with the sacrifices you both had to make just to be able to date each other. It was hard, but it was worth it. You just had to reassure him of it at times.
“I know, Kev. You know you make me really happy, though, right?” The way you said it was almost like a promise to him; a promise that he would always make you happier than anyone else. 
“I know I do, I just wish I was able to do more, you know?” You hummed, trying to fight back a yawn and listen to everything that was plaguing his mind, but it slipped past you before you could stop it. 
“I’m sorry, I know you’re tired. I’ll be okay. You can go back to sleep.” He turned on his side, pressing a kiss to your forehead.
“Will you be able to sleep?” You pulled him just a bit closer, craving more of his body warmth and comforting embrace.
“I’ll try. If I can’t, I promise to still keep you warm.” He smiled fondly at you as you got comfortable again, adjusting the blankets to cover you properly and shuffling your head on your pillow.
“I love you.” You mumbled, closing your eyes and letting the tiredness wash over you in waves. You felt Kevin’s lips press against yours, but it was soft and fleeting, only lasting for a second before he pulled away.
“I love you too. Sorry for my brain.” He whispered back.
“I love your brain, too. I just wish it was nicer to you.” You said, half asleep at that point. You couldn’t see Kevin’s half-hearted smile, but you felt him pull you even closer until your head was resting on his chest instead of the pillow. The last gesture assured your brain that you could really fall asleep again. Kevin always slept better the closer he was cuddled up to you, so you had hope that sleep would finally grace him as well.
↳ tbz taglist: @eternalgyu,, @cyberpunksunwoo,, @cosmicwintr,, @weird-bookworm,, @haecien
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sanaxo-o · 27 days
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We can’t be friends (Kevin Moon)
Warnings/genre: ah well lovers to strangers, misunderstandings, angst, hurt comfort at the end ig? Not proofread so let me know if there should be any corrections. Plz let me know if more warnings or anything should be here.
Word count: 1,340
Sana: I am back (only for a while lmao) and I present you my first ever Kevin Moon fic which I am slightly proud about. I had to write on we can’t be friends because yes. Like the song is just so SHSHSHDJD it’d be a crime if I did not do anything considering I am known (I like to believe that) for my fics which are inspired by songs. My all time favourite beta reader izzy is not available so no proofread because yas 👏. And a huge thanks to @mosviqu bar for making the banner despite it getting on her nerves. Love you loads mwah.
Tagging: @mosviqu @kimsohn @cloverdaisies
@o-onikix @quaissants @deoboyznet
🧸🧸🧸🧸🧸🧸🧸🧸🧸🧸🧸🧸🧸🧸🧸🧸
Date: March 30th 2024
Sitting in the corner of the room you stare at all the people mingling with each other, laughing and giggling as if everything is normal and going oh so well in their lives when in fact it’s crumbling apart.
Taking a sip of the beer which was almost over you look around the room once again when your eyes meet his, staring at you from across the room.
You could feel your heart beating again, the way it started beating loudly made you scared, not because you feared him but because you feared yourself.
You swore to yourself that you had moved on from him. After everything you both went through, you thought it’s better if you stayed just as friends but you yourself knew that you both cannot be friends.
Every passing second of the day made you loathe him more, not because he was your ex but because he just decided to give up on your relationship just like that when you decided it was the end.
Keeping the can of bear on the nearest table you found you grabbed your coat and walked away from there. Not being able to sit there and act as if everything was alright when it in fact was not. You knew it was not, he knew it was not.
Date: March 20th 2024
Sitting on the bed you hold the necklace in your hand as you take in a deep breath. You hated arguing with him, in fact you hated when you would snap at each other simply because you both would bottle up your feelings.
The countless misunderstandings you both went through meant nothing at this point when your whole relationship is tearing apart like this.
“What’s the point?” You hear Kevin mumble briefly as he sits up from his lying position and places his head in his hands.
You could feel your heart breaking when you heard his voice for the first time ever since the argument you both had in the living.
You muster up the courage and strength to speak as you let out the words which were oh so irritating for someone in his shoes because of the obliviousness “What do you mean?”
You close your eyes when you hear Kevin let out a scoff, “You know what I mean, this is not working out. Whatever we have going on, none of it is working out. We can pretend that it’s all fine but deep down you know nothing is. Let’s stop wasting each other's time and just..end it.” Kevin says that as he stands up from the bed and grabs his coat to walk out of the room.
“Can we still be friends?” You ask him, halting in his steps Kevin turns around and lets out a small sigh when he sees your expectant eyes which were now filled with tears threatening to fall down and roll down your cheeks.
“We can’t be friends..” he says as he leaves the room and slams the door of your house shut.
You sit there in silence as you look around the room, on this very bed you celebrated your 20th birthday with him.
“We can’t be friends, but I’d just like to pretend…” you mumble to yourself as you bring your legs to your chest and let your tears fall down.
Date: March 30th 2024
Time: 12:47 PM
Walking down the street you hug yourself closer as you look up at the sky, it was empty which made you smile but it had no feelings.
You stop walking when you hear footsteps behind you, turning your head you could feel your face stiffening when you see Kevin running in your direction.
“Are you going back home?” He says once he is in front of you. Giving him a single nod you start walking again, not being able to stare at him for another second.
Walking in silence you stare at the ground while kicking the stones on the sidewalk. Taking in a deep breath you look up at Kevin who was walking beside you.
In his words he just wanted to make sure you reached home safely. Hence, the reason he decided to accompany you.
“Do you regret it?” You ask suddenly. You notice Kevin stopping in his tracks for a moment only to walk again as he tries to act nonchalant.
“Regret what?” He asks softly as he looks down at you, his eyes looking like daydreams. You still remember how you always felt seen and heard at night.
For you night is when you can finally be yourself, you don’t have to hide yourself anymore.
“Us breaking up…”
Letting out a deep breath Kevin looks at you with a small smile as he holds your hand guides you towards the end of the footpath to sit down on the ground.
“We needed to put an end to our story Y/N…I did not want to continue feeding on the monstrous fire which was increasing day by day. It’s difficult, yeah…but that’s the best for us.” He says softly as he holds your hands in hid for comfort.
“It’s hard. Really hard. I don’t know how you’re acting all fine..” you tell him as you pull your hand away from him.
“I am not fine if that’s what you’re wondering. I tell myself countless times to just wait for you to come back but then I was the one who broke up with you. I wish we could still be friends but I cannot get myself to do it. I cannot pretend to be your friend when I know I want more than that.” He says as he lets out a small sob.
“I can wait for you. I can wait for your love, I can do that..” you say as you try to stop yourself from crying over this again.
Shaking his head he lets your hand go as he stands up and helps you stand up.
“Can I just say one thing?” You say softly, your words coming out slurred as the alcohol starts getting to you. Giving you a small nod he helps you walk towards your house, “Know that you made me the happiest person when we were together. I couldn’t ask for more than what we had…it feels like you left me hanging by myself but I know I would have to move on and let this story die.”
You say everything in one go as you cough and hiccup. You notice Kevin opening his mouth to speak again but you stop him by putting your finger up telling him that you want to continue and that you’re not done yet, “For now, it’s only me but…but I’d like to pretend that we’re still friends, okay?” You say as you look at him with your expectant eyes.
“Okay…whatever you say..” he says softly as he looks down at your shining eyes which were staring back up at him. “Maybe that’s all you need to move on from me..” he says, mostly to himself but you catch onto it but he doubts you’d remember all this in the morning tomorrow.
Reaching your door steps he helps you stand straight as he looks through your bag to find your keys.
“You keep on clinging to your papers and pens, yeah?” You say softly in a joking manner as you enter the house and slam the door shut on his face.
Letting out a small chuckle Kevin looks at your door as he takes a step back, stuffing his hands in his pockets he takes a one last look at your door and walks away.
That’s an end to a story then, something which was bittersweet. There are some moments he wishes he could forget all together but most of them are the ones he cherishes the most and that’s what matters to him.
You guys maybe strangers to each other now but the time you both spent as lovers was some of the most valuable ones.
🧸🧸🧸🧸🧸🧸🧸🧸🧸🧸🧸🧸🧸🧸🧸🧸
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sungbeam · 7 months
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nonidol!kevin moon x f!reader
another summer break, another annual trip to the lake! except, it seems like when you and kev get there, you'll have to make some tweaks to the original rescue protocol.
▷ genre, warnings. childhood friends 2 lovers, fluff, hurt/comfort, humor, swearing, motherly meddling and matchmaking, shirtless kevin..., kissing, talks of academic expectations/pressure/insecurity/and lack of fulfillment, kim seokjin is my favorite plot device, this could technically be slow burn, pining-ish?, im sorry joshua + serena, little to no interactions with the other boyz 😔
▷ word count. 29.0k (...hah)
this is the sixth installment of the love in unity series! reading the prev fics is not required, but i do encourage it :] all prev yns will be referred to as _!yn
a/n: return to summer with me 😌 or for those of u on the other side of the world, we can give summer an early welcome :') treat her w kindness pls </3 hope u enjoy!!
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EPISODE ONE (PILOT): DON’T YOU LOVE FORESHADOWING?
"IT still feels weird, man." Kevin Moon brushed his hand over the surface of his newly cropped hair, freshly cut specifically for this summer break, just earlier this week. He probably should have gotten it done before he took all those pictures with his graduating friends, but life had been busy as of late.
Jacob Bae, best friend, roommate, and one of the recent graduates, chuckled from the other side of the video chat. "I'm sure it does. But hey, it looks good, so it's not like you have anything to worry about."
Kevin glanced over at the car where his dad was gassing up. His mom was in the back seat, waving her arm out the window to beckon him back to the vehicle. "Thanks," he grinned. "Looks like my mom is telling me to come back. This is probably the last time I'll have signal for a few weeks."
Just behind Kevin was the little gas station he and his parents stopped at for snacks and the last leg of their drive. It was tradition that every summer his family made the trek to their lakeside cabin a few hours out of Vancouver. Except last summer, Kevin couldn't make it; in contrast, this summer, Kevin and his parents were going without Kevin's younger sister. Usually, there were a couple other families that were there at the same time, too, who Kevin had grown up with. It was usually a grand time.
Kevin adjusted the bag of snacks he'd purchased from the store that hung on his arm as he made his way back to the car.
"Make sure to take pics! And say hi to your mom for me," said Jacob.
"Why don't you say hi to her yourself, Jacob-ah?" Kevin's mom chided teasingly as Kevin took his place in the passenger seat next to his dad. Ever since Kevin and Jacob had met at that one, fateful out-of-country student mixer at university, neither of them shut up about each other to their own families. It was like finding a needle in a haystack, locating a fellow Korean-Canadian.
Kevin passed his phone back to his mom, and he heard Jacob's immediate, "Hi imo! How are you?"
"I've been doing well. Wah, you look so glowy," his mom marveled, and Kevin felt her nudge him in the shoulder. "Hyungseo-ah, maybe you should get a girlfriend, too, if this is how radiant Jacob looks after so long."
Jacob's warm chuckle contrasted Kevin's groan. The latter rubbed his hand down his face with an embarrassed wince. "Eomma," he said weakly, sliding down in his seat. Not this again.
The car began to roll out of the gas station and he lowered his window to catch the breeze as they went. He already recognized the pattern of trees in this area, and his heart fluttered at the thought of being so close to childhood again. The lake was always a favorite place of his.
"—Kevin mentioned something about other families being there?"
"Oh, yes. We're always there with the Ln family, and more recently, Kevin's cousin—you know Yuna, right? She and her husband Seokjin meet us there with their kids now."
Kevin rested his elbow along the edge of the window. "Uncle Seokjin is an interesting character, Cobie," he mused. "I think you'd get along."
"Seokjin gets along with everyone," his dad chimed in.
"You know who you should get along with, Kevin?—" Kevin already knew where his mom was going with this, "—Yn Ln! You're not gonna be shy after spending so long away from her, are you?"
Jacob's voice echoed in the car. "Who's Yn Ln?"
Kevin squirmed in his seat. "Just—a family friend. Mom, can we please not make this a big deal?" And why in the world would he be shy around his childhood best friend? Three years couldn’t have changed a person that much, could it? You were cute—but in a dorky way—that was how he had always seen you.
She sent him an innocent look. "What? I don't know what you're talking about."
"You know what I'm talking about," he said, twisting around in his seat to send her a pleading look. "I don't wanna make her uncomfortable, especially since… y'know… we're not kids anymore?"
His mom made a sound of disapproval, but relented. "Aish, fine. I won't say anything; I promise."
A beat of silence. Then from the phone, "I still have no clue what's going on."
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The twins were being a pain again. Most of the time, since you were away at college, you actually missed the twin hellspawn, but you should have known that bliss would shatter the moment you had to endure another five hour car ride with them.
"—MAMA, CONNOR IS BEING A JERK—"
"WELL, ALICE WOULDN'T SHARE THE GOLDFISH!"
The noise-canceling headphones weren't working. Usually, they worked substantially well when trying to block out the frat party noises at school, but they weren't holding up well against adolescent discourse. You would have thought that once they had grown out of toddler-hood, they would calm down a little, but sibling rivalry prevailed.
You shucked your useless headphones off and twisted around in your seat to peer into the backseat. "Here, have mine," you said, dropping your bag of goldfish into your little brother's lap.
Connor's eyes lit up in delight. "Thanks, Yn!"
Your ears rang as you turned back to the front.
The drive up to the lake house was something you and your family did every summer, except, you hadn't gone two summers ago for a summer internship. It was a tradition completed with other families—namely the Moons, who were longtime family friends out of Vancouver. You hadn't seen Kevin, their only son who was your age, in two years because of your conflicting schedules. It would have happened again this year, but your misfortune had you internship-less. Then again, a trip to the lake was never a bad thing.
You leaned your head back against your seat rest to enjoy the rare moment of silence in the car. Already, you could begin to point out the familiar scenery out of your window.
“I heard we’re gonna be getting new neighbors this year,” you heard your mother say from the front row, breaking the brief quiet.
You blinked out of your daze, shifting in your seat and to give momentary relief to your aching behind. “Oh, really? Do we know who they are?”
“Aw, so Uncle Jin and Auntie Yuna aren’t coming to the lake with us?” Alice pouted from the backseat.
“No, Uncle and Auntie are both still coming up with us,” you dad piped up from the driver’s seat. He caught your eyes through the rear view mirror. “Their little ones are coming, too. We’re just gonna have even more people this year.”
“Should be fun,” you murmured. You leaned down to rummage through the backpack at your feet for your backup bag of snacks (because some part of your brain just knew that the twins would forget how to share).
“I can’t wait to see Kevin!” This was Connor; you could feel the car shake as he bounced up and down in his seat. “I’ve been wanting to show him my new helicopter—”
Your eyebrows furrowed. “Con, you brought the helicopter?”
“Yeah, and what about it?”
Before further argument could erupt between you and your brother, your mom stepped in. “Speaking of Kevin…”
You could feel the coming conversation like there were dark gray storm clouds forming in the distance—impending doom, you liked to think. You fumbled with the opening of your chip bag. “Mama, could you possibly, by any chance, not try and set me and Kevin up anymore?” There, you’d said it. It was out in the open.
“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” your mother sniffed. “I only think that you and Kevin would be very nice together! It’s already so convenient that our families are long-time friends, and—”
“Mama,” you emphasized. “I don’t wanna get into a relationship for convenience's sake.” Your skin was already beginning to heat. Having known the Moons for so long, as well as having kids the same age, your mom and his mom had harped on the opportunity to bring your families together through more than one way.
“She just doesn’t want to get into a relationship at all!” Your little brother cackled.
You sent him a dull look over your shoulder. “And after I gave you my goldfish?” The situation concerning relationships wasn’t as Connor so bluntly put it; rather, you simply had yet to find the right person, as it was for many people. A relationship would have been nice, but when it came, then it would come. Plus, you were pretty sure that Kevin wasn’t the most comfortable with being matchmade with you by the Mother Matchmakers either. That was what the pact was for, anyway.
“I’m just saying that Kevin is a smart, good-looking young man,” your mother teased.
You hadn’t seen him in almost three years, but how much could three years change a guy? Maybe you would admit that he was cute. If you hadn’t known him since he wore Cars diapers, maybe you would have had a crush on him. “No matchmaking,” you repeated.
Your mother sighed melodramatically. “Fine. No matchmaking with Kevin.”
“Thank you,” you said, settling into your seat. Something stirred in the back of your mind, though. For some reason, you had a feeling that this wasn’t the end of this conversation. But as you turned your attention back to the scenery whizzing past you, you let all dealings with matchmaking, boys, and relationships sink to the very back of your mind.
EPISODE TWO: IT’S CALLED AN AMBUSH
THANKS to the convenience of no signal, you could safely attempt to forget about the internship you hadn’t landed this year. The entire debacle had been a headache and a half, but the residual sadness still lingered. There was something about the lakehouse, though, that gave you hope that you could get over it. While you wouldn’t spend this summer doing something “productive” toward your career, you would at least be presented with a pleasant alternative.
Your dad pulled the family SUV into the gravel driveway of your family lakehouse, and childhood flooded back to you. All of the dark oak walls and browned window sills and wildflowers blooming in the front walkway among the grass… You could remember crashing your bike into that one bush to the side of the house where the rain gutter now stood hugging the building.
The twins had fallen asleep sometime between the matchmaking conversation and here, which left the car in a sort of serenity that matched the surroundings. Your house in particular was one of the few houses that was perched a little higher than the lakeshore. There were a couple around the lake that sat directly on the water with docks built into their lower levels though.
You notched your car door open, shouldered your backpack, then quietly lowered your car’s seat. Connor, who was sitting directly behind you, had his head tilted to the side, mouth wide open to catch flies as he slept. With a cheeky smile, you snapped a picture of him. Once tucking your phone away, you climbed into the back to shake him and Alice awake.
“Hey, we’re here,” you murmured. Your parents were already beginning to unload the car of your supplies for the next couple of weeks.
Your brother’s eyes fluttered open, and his arms stretched over his head as he began to compute his surroundings. “Mmm… I’m hungry,” he babbled and smacked his lips together.
Yep, this one was awake.
You patted his face in your version of sisterly affection as you leaned over him to get to his twin. “You gotta wait, dude. You’re gonna ruin your dinner.”
He rubbed his hand over his face. “You always sound like Mom when you say that.”
“I’ll take that as a compliment,” you huffed. You nudged your sister. “Hey, Alice. Up, hm?”
She shifted in her seat, eyes still closed. “Are we here yet?”
“Yeah, hon. We’re here.” With your task completed, you backed out of the car to make space for the twins to climb out after you. You took a step backwards, your foot catching against something and making you tumble into the person directly behind you. “Ah! Shi—”
“Language!” Your mom called from the other side of the car. “Hi Kevin! Wow, did you get a haircut?”
Kevin…?
You recognized the warm chuckle behind you, and the arms helping to steady you patted your shoulders in greeting. “I did!”
When you whirled around, your mouth stretched in a grin, but you didn’t expect to come face to face with the confident stature of the man behind you. He was in a tank top and shorts, which were definitely proper attire for the humid temperature, and yet, your brain was thinking about the amount of arm muscle there was. Oh, and of course, the cropped black hair. You could have sworn his jaw got sharper, too… This was not the timid-faced Kevin Moon—rising freshman in college—you last recalled.
“Kevin!” Connor’s body rocketed past you and crashed into Kevin’s legs.
Kevin bent down slightly to ruffle your little brother’s hair. “Hey, little man! What’s good?”
“I wanna show you my helicopter—!”
“Connor,” Alice said as she hopped out of the car, “Mama wants you to help bring in your stuff, and then you can show Kevin your helicopter.”
Connor’s mouth gaped open like a fish’s. “Wha—what about Yn?”
“Well, that’s just what Mama said, so,” your little sister said matter-of-factly. She raised a hand in a wave to Kevin. “Hi!”
Kevin returned the gesture with a sweet smile. “Hi, Alice.”
You and Kevin watched as your twin siblings raced into the lakehouse with their backpacks strapped onto their bodies. You could hear their hollering from out here as they fought over who would get the top bunk this year.
“They’ve gotten taller,” Kevin commented, drawing your attention back to him.
You brushed your hair from your face. “Yeah, you should’ve seen my reaction when I came back home and they were like, not small enough where I could trip over them anymore.”
The two of you shared a small laugh, and you held one arm with your other. You hadn’t realized how a few years could reset things between the two of you, but you supposed it was also attributed to the fact that three years away at college could lead to a lot of difference and a lot of growth.
“So what’s new with you?” You asked him and nudged his arm with your elbow. “Have you been working out?” You blurted, but ran with it.
Kevin smiled, reaching back to cup the nape of his neck with that sheepishness you recognized as something distinctly Kevin. Maybe things weren’t so different. “Hah, yeah actually. Is it that noticeable?”
You looked him up and down with what you hoped he saw as teasing and not you actually checking him out. “Yeah, dude. You look good though.”
“Really? Thanks, Yn. I appreciate it.” He stuck his hands in the pockets of his shorts. "You look good, too—and oh my god, I have so much to catch you up on—"
"Hyungseo! Stop hogging Yn and come in to help with dinner." Just a little ways down the path, Kevin’s mom peered out from the front porch of the Moons’ house. The houses in this neighborhood were a little more spread out than the average suburban street, but their house had always been the closest to yours.
You could have sworn you saw a dusting of pink on your friend’s cheekbones. “I’m not hogging her,” he groaned. He turned back to you, throwing a thumb in the direction of his house. “I’ll see you guys over at ours in a few then?”
You gave a nod. “For sure. My mom and I marinated a couple things for tonight this morning, so we’ll be bringing those over.”
“Sweet,” he grinned, already backpedaling toward his house. “See ya, Yn!”
“Bye, Kevin,” you chuckled and bounded up toward your house.
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Once everyone in your household had settled in for the most part, your dad corralled your siblings over to the Moon house, while you and your mom brought over your family’s offerings of tonight’s dinner. Instead of entering through their front door, you simply bypassed the invisible property line between your houses and found Kevin and his dad firing up the barbeque on the back lawn.
Kevin looked up from the box of aluminum foil in his hands and dropped it onto the table. "Oh, auntie! Let me get that for you," he said, meeting you in the middle and taking the tray out of your mom's hands.
"Thank you," she said to him. "How has school been, Kevin? Remind me again—you're a…?"
"Photography major," he replied. The three of you swept past Kevin's dad on your way up to the Moons' house.
"Ah, how's that going for you?"
"It's going well—" Your mom slid the screen door open and you all deposited your shoes to the side before entering the kitchen. "—I should be able to graduate two quarters early, which is nice."
Your mom nodded her head. "That's good, that's good. Katherine, it's nice to see you again!"
As your mom shuffled over to the sink where Kevin's mom was washing a colander of cabbage, you and Kevin set the trays down on the kitchen island.
You heard Kevin's gasp of delight when he lifted the foil off his. "No way. I love your mom's short ribs so much," he said, tipping his head back with his eyes closed.
You laughed at his reaction. "Me, too dude. It's never the same when I try to recreate it at school."
"Oh, for sure," he agreed. He cocked his head to the side, a frown coming into his face. "These should probably go back out to the grill then, huh."
You considered the two trays of meat before you. "You're right."
You both covered the trays back over and began to make your way back out to the lawn.
"Has Connor showed you his helicopter yet?" You asked Kevin while you slid your shoes back on.
The screen door slid shut behind him with his other arm carrying his tray. "He did." Kevin brightened, "It's cool. That kid should go into aviation or engineering."
"That's what I'm thinking," you said. "Though, he's not the greatest at math, but I guess he still has a long way to go before he even needs to consider all that."
He nodded, sighing. "That's true. The twins have a long way to go. Crazy how far we've gotten, y'know?"
You both dropped the marinated meat trays over by Kevin's dad, only to greet your dad on the way down to help out. You were sure that you and Kevin were needed up at the house anyway; your dad had mentioned something about having Connor and Alice start on the batch of kimchi. You hoped he had set up some newspaper this time to avoid a mess.
"My sister says your porch swing broke last year," Kevin said as he followed you back into the kitchen.
"Oh yeah!" You snorted. "Pro tip: don't try to fit two families on that thing. Not a good idea."
The moms directed you both over to the fruits and vegetables on the counter that still needed to be prepped, and you picked up a knife, and Kevin a peeler.
Kevin's brows knitted together as he tossed and caught an asian pear with one hand. "You guys tried to fit both families on that thing? It could barely handle two people the last time I remember."
"Hey, in our defense," you started, already giggling at the memory, "we wanted a cool picture, but then we ended up almost putting a hole through our porch. Lesson learned."
"Lesson learned, indeed." He shook his head as he shucked the pretty ring of golden peel he'd gotten from the pear into the paper bag beside him. "Is it fixed now?"
"Should be," you said. You used the blade of your knife to help coax the peel of the red onion off, then diligently began to take the rest off. "We need a maximum occupancy sign to go with it."
He laughed. "Something like 'less than four people' or something?"
"I think it can handle four people!"
His eyebrows arched high. "You wanna test that theory?"
You glanced up from your diced onions for just a second to meet his gaze. "Uhm no. But you are definitely welcome to."
"Oh, no, no! I'm not getting looped into this solo again like you did with the tire swing that one year."
"Okay, that time wasn't my fault! You said that you bet we could ride it together without breaking the tree branch, and I said—"
Your thought train cut off when the doorbell rang. Both yours and Kevin's heads perked up at the sound and darted in the direction like a pair of meerkats. Even from this room, you could hear the front door being opened and the commotion firing up. There was only one family left to join the party, and you knew exactly who had come to make his presence known.
In minimal time, a lanky man with dark brown bangs and a magazine-cover-worthy face barged into the kitchen with his hands raised, full of grocery bags, and a child riding in a carrier on his chest. "Hello, everyone! Your favorite, most handsome uncle has arrived."
"Hi, Uncle Jin," both you and Kevin chorused, as Kevin's mom took the grocery bags from him with thanks. Your mom must have been the one who opened the door since she had gone into the other room to monitor the twins and their kimchi.
"Hello, children—wow," Kim Seokjin said as he made eyes at Kevin's arms, giving them a little squish. "Close the gyms, everyone. What have they been feeding you at college?"
Kevin's face reddened. "It's nothing, really."
"Nothing?" Seokjin made eye contact with you. "You're seeing this, too, right?"
You swallowed your laugh, but you couldn't suppress your smile. "I'm seeing it, too," you confirmed. You set your knife down and gently ran your finger over baby Leena's head; you wondered how she was still asleep with how loud her father's voice was. "Awh, she's adorable."
Your uncle by association put his hands on his hips. "Fatherhood is great, but let me tell you," he said with flair, "after two kids, I don't want anymore. I think I've seen enough dirty diapers for you both combined."
Kevin laughed. "I'm sure Yuna-noona's on the same page."
"Yes, your cousin and I are definitely on the same page," Jin confirmed while clasping a hand on Kevin's shoulder. His eyes widened, and he gave the muscle beneath his fingers a squeeze. "Jesus—"
"Jin! Do you know where the bag with the formula is?" That was Yuna, Kevin's cousin, calling from the next room over. Soon, her head poked in through the doorway, and her mouth curved into a delighted smile at the sight of familiar faces. "Oh, hi everyone!"
"I think it's in the red colored bag, babe," Jin said as he turned away from you and Kevin and waddled over to where his wife was.
"That's what I thought, too, but I can't find it."
With the young couple now off in search of their bag of baby formula, you and Kevin were again left to yourselves with the fruits and vegetables.
You scooped the diced onions up with one hand and the blade of your knife into an empty bowl for later. "Well, that was…"
"Quite an entrance?" Kevin finished. You could still see the rosiness in his cheeks. "Yup."
"You can always count on Uncle Jin to liven up a place."
"Oh, definitely." Kevin picked up another pear to peel; they would probably either be sliced up for the kids to eat or maybe used to make a dessert later. Something of the sort, at least. "Now where were we?"
You raised your brows as you picked up a carrot. "I think we were talking about how you broke the tire swing in seventh grade."
The evening progressed swiftly with everyone's combined efforts in throwing dinner together. By the time the sun was about to make its descent into the horizon, all three families were moved out onto the back lawn with chairs set up and meats cooking on the grill. There was something beautiful about the lake at this hour—then again, there was always something beautiful about the lake. You couldn’t put your finger on it, but even the way the mosquitoes danced in the waning sunlight made your chest feel warm and fuzzy.
If you strained your vision a little, you could even make out the shapes of people on the opposite shoreline beginning to light campfires of their own. Most of the people who lived around the perimeter of the lake sublet their properties during the non-vacation seasons like your family, the Moons, and the Kims. Then, when the time came, they would return to their lakehouse hideaways for much needed rejuvenation.
As golden hour painted the landscape glorious shades of auburn and butter, you caught your mother making her way toward you out of the corner of your eye.
“Yn-ah,” she said to you with a plate of the fruit that you and Kevin had cut earlier in her hands. She gestured for you to take it from her, then nodded up over to the house on the other side of the Moons’ place. “Take the twins and go welcome our new guests.”
You furrowed your brows. “New guests?” When you followed her gaze, you saw that the house next door had acquired a new car in its driveway. You definitely didn’t recognize it, but you managed to spot what looked like someone disappearing in the front door of the house.
“They’re one of the new families, I think,” she told you. She then gave you a little nudge, urging, “Go. We’re still working on dinner anyways.”
You glanced between the plate of fruit in your possession, then searched the back lawn for the hellspawn. When you located their whereabouts (skipping through a pair of hula hoops over by the big oak tree), you marched over to them to repeat your mother’s instructions.
“Oi!” You called out.
Alice looked over at you as she stopped her skipping. “I don’t want fruit,” she said when she saw what you were holding.
You stopped just short of Connor’s hula hoop circumference. “It’s not for you. Mama wants us to go say hi to the new neighbors. Come on.”
“Do we have to?”
“If I do, then yes. And Mama said so.” Plus, you were not planning to go alone upon any circumstance. Your social anxiety could not take showing up at a stranger’s doorstep alone and with fruit.
The twins dropped their hula hoops and begrudgingly trudged after you. No child could trump the “Mom said so” card. At least, not in this household.
With your siblings following after you like two ducklings to a Mother Goose, Kevin saw the line of you walking past from where he was stationed beside his dad. His eyes zipped from you, the kids, and the plate of fruit, then cocked his head to the side in bemused inquiry.
You inclined your head toward the house you aimed for in the distance and lifted the plate of fruit as if that was enough explanation.
He gave a grave nod for your sake, teasing of course, then held up his free hand in a thumb’s up for encouragement.
Nonetheless, you and your siblings carried on.
The lakehouse on the Moons’ other side was similar to all the others around the lake: dark wood walls, doors encased in a protective screen door, grass and flowers growing out of the cracks where the house met the earth. You could feel your siblings converge on you, nearly hiding behind you, as you all approached the front door. It wasn’t that the house looked scary in any way—it was just the prospect of new people that was the scary part. You were sure this family was just as friendly as everyone else, but it didn’t hurt to be a little nervous.
When the three of you reached the front door, you raised your hand to ring the doorbell.
You could hear the echo of the bell inside the house, followed swiftly by a man’s voice, “I’ll get it!”
Footsteps drawing closer… then the locks came undone, and finally, the main door inside the screen swung open.
“Hi,” greeted the young man on the other side.
You paused when his face became clearer after opening the screen door. He was, to put it bluntly, awfully pretty. Dark hair swept back out of his face and behind his ear, a prince’s facial features, and a smile that was as beautiful as the golden hour greeted you and your siblings. Even his voice was soft.
Alice held onto the side of your shorts pocket. “You're pretty.”
The man made an expression of humble surprise, and heat rose to your neck. “Sorry,” you stammered. “We’re from a couple doors down and we wanted to welcome you to the lake. These are for you and your family.” You managed to pass the plate over to him without being any more embarrassing.
He accepted the offering graciously. “Oh, wow. Thank you so much! That’s so thoughtful.”
You placed your hands on either of your siblings’ backs to push them forward slightly. “I’m Yn, and these are my little siblings, Alice and Connor.”
Your siblings chimed in their hellos to the pretty man.
His eyes narrowed in upturned crescent moons, smile widening. “Well it’s really nice to meet you guys. I’m Joshua, but my friends call me Josh or Shua.”
EPISODE THREE: MAMMA MIA! HERE WE GO AGAIN…
IT turned out that your mother had an ulterior motive for sending you and your siblings to greet the newcomers. She had popped up behind you soon after Joshua had introduced himself to invite him and his family to have dinner with you. You could sniff out the conspiracy from a mile away, but you still wanted to give your mom the benefit of the doubt.
When the first night passed without anything happening, though, you slowly let your guard down. (Rookie mistake.)
Everyone crashed into bed after cleaning up dinner. The move up to the lake was a tiring one, and the promise of an early start the next morning proved to be more than enough encouragement to hit the hay.
You were on the living room couch with Alice sitting on the floor between your legs the next day. It was late morning by this time, and you and your siblings had just woken up less than an hour ago. Your dad was still asleep, and your mom? Well, you weren’t really sure where he was.
“Ow, can you stop tugging?” Alice whined under her breath, her hand rocketing up to the back of her head to stop your hands.
You paused your movement for the third time in the past fifteen minutes. “It wouldn’t hurt this bad if you would just let me run a comb through it.”
“The brush works fine if you use it correctly!”
You exhaled sharply and pressed your lips together. There was never any rest between your two little siblings, whether it was amongst themselves or against you. You supposed you could just suck it up for the time being; it wasn’t often that you got to braid your little sister’s hair. She usually just liked to leave it down.
You heard the backdoor open and shut behind you, and the both of you turned your heads to see who it was. Your mom entered the house with perspiration gleaming on her face as she took off her sun hat and tossed it onto one of the dining room chairs.
“Hi Mama,” the two of you said, one after the other.
Your mom settled onto the couch cushion next to you. “Hi girls. Is your brother and dad up yet?”
“Connor’s with Uncle Jin and Aunt Yuna,” said Alice. “Daddy’s still asleep though.”
“Mm,” she hummed. She combed her fingers through her sweat-soaked hair. “It’s a warm morning out,” she murmured, then quickly added, “hey you.” She knocked her hand against your arm.
“Hm?” You asked as you finished up Alice’s braid and tied it off with the blue Cinnamoroll hair tie she’d chosen. You patted her back with your hand. “You’re done.”
Your little sister hopped to her feet. “Thanks!” She dashed away and out of the room—to where, you had no clue. You figured she knew where the food was if she was hungry.
You angled your body to squish your side against the couch cushions and face your mother. “What were you saying?”
“Ah, I was going to talk to you about the Joshua Hong boy.”
Joshua Hong. You didn’t realize you could hear a man’s name so often within twelve hours.
You made a gesture with your hand. “What about the Joshua Hong boy, Mom?”
“Well, isn’t he a handsome one?” She asked you enthusiastically, straightening in her seat. It was alarming how bright her expression became. “I spoke to his mom while Kevin and I were walking just now, and he’s only a few years older than you, you know.”
You heard a metaphorical record scratch. What? There was so much in that one sentence that you needed to unpack. You raised your hands to signal her to pause. “Wait, since when do you and Kevin take walks together?” What could they have been talking about? You knew Kevin was an exceptional conversationalist, but never in your time at the lake had you known of this interaction.
Your mother blinked. “Oh, we started the tradition when you didn’t come up with us that one year.”
“Tradition?” So this happened more than once? You didn’t know why you were so scandalized by this information—it was just Kevin after all. You knew your parents and even your siblings were all fond of him—of course they were. You were arguably even more fond of him, but that wasn’t the point. You hoped she hadn't said anything about you and him as an item at any point of time… you trusted that Kevin could handle that though; that was what the pact was for, after all.
“Why are you making such a big deal out of this?” She arched a brow. “But anyway, yes, so we bumped into Josh’s mom on the last leg around the lake, and she mentioned that he’s majoring in chemistry and planning to go into medicine. You guys might have something in common.”
You pursed your lips. Perhaps the two of you might have something to talk about, but your track was pre-veterinary rather than pre-med. There was probably a middle ground though... Maybe you were just being stubborn.
“Just make friends or something,” she said to you while standing up from the couch. “You need more of those.”
Your eyes shot wide open. “Hello? Mom?” Now that was simply uncalled for.
She chuckled impishly as she walked away and disappeared down the hall, leaving you to yourself. You were lucky neither of the twins were here to hear that burn.
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It wasn’t much longer than a couple hours later that you found yourself on the backyard lawn space setting up the badminton net between two oak trees with Kevin’s assistance. Everyone was outside and awake, and the kids were all seated up on your house’s back porch munching on the watermelon that Yuna cut for them.
You tightened the string on one side of the net. “So he didn't kiss her?” You queried.
Kevin sputtered a laugh, yanking his side to test its integrity. “Yeah,” he said. “Isn’t it so funny? According to multiple sources, Sunwoo and Chanhee barged in at the perfect moment, and frankly—” Kevin raised his arms up in the air and let them fall for effect, “—ruined the moment.”
"Pfft.” You considered that for a moment. An almost kiss ruined by a comedically timed interruption from a guy drunk off liquor and love, and the friend tasked with dumping his ass at home. That was bad luck if you ever heard it. “And what about that other dude? The Hyunjae guy? Did he finally fix his eyesight?”
Your friend leaned back against his oak tree, ankles crossed over the other and arms braided over his chest. A pair of shades rested backwards on his head to complete his summer-worthy ensemble of shorts and T-shirt. “His literal eyesight is still shit, but yeah, he and HJ!Yn are together now. Took for-fucking-ever, but—”
“Language!” Jin yelled like a referee on the sideline of a soccer match. “We have children in the vicinity.”
Kevin brushed a hand through his hair. “Whoopsies, sorry!” He turned back to you. “Anyways, yes, they are finally together. Man, having someone watch my cursing makes it seem like Jacob is here with me.”
You noticed the fond twinkle in his eyes as he stared out at the still waters of the lake just down the way from you both. “You talk about this Jacob guy a lot,” you said to him. “I think I need to meet the person who’s threatening to knock me off the best friend pedestal.”
“He already has,” he jested.
You let out an indignant squawk. “Hurtful!”
Connor, watermelon juice smeared all around his mouth, added rather unnecessarily, “So you don’t want a partner and you don’t have friends. What do you have, Yn?”
You leveled a scowl at him. “An annoying little brother.”
“Hey!”
In a tone dryer than the Sahara Desert, Alice chimed in, “Guess that makes me the favorite twin.”
“I should tell you about Sangyeon. I need to yell about Sangyeon,” Kevin huffed indignantly, snapping his fingers as if the thought just hit him. You whipped your head back over. “Oh my god, dude, you know what happened at the graduation ceremony? It was like, straight out of a scene from a movie—!”
You never got to find out what was just like it was out of a movie, because your mom appeared in the distance with the Hongs. They all came wielding badminton racquets—how convenient. You didn’t mind the extra company, of course, and despite your stubbornness, you knew Joshua and his family were very nice people.
You caught the tail end of your mother’s conversation with Josh and his mom: “...Yn used to play badminton on the high school team. She could’ve gone to the Olympics if she really wanted to—”
Well, that was only partly true. Your team had gone to Nationals, but the Olympics was one step above Worlds. You liked to think you were pretty good at the sport, but you hoped your mom wasn’t talking up you and your abilities too much.
“Oh, wow. I’m a soccer person myself,” said Joshua good-naturedly. “I don’t really know much about badminton, but it seems like a really fun sport.”
"Yn's a great teacher. She taught the twins how to play." Ah, there it was.
When they were within a comfortable distance, you raised your hand in a wave. "Hi hello!"
"Hello Yn," Joshua's mom said back. "Hi Kevin."
Kevin dipped his head with a smile. "Hi Auntie."
"Yn-ah," said your mom as she took you by the arm, dragging you over toward Joshua, "I was just talking to Josh about how good you are at badminton."
Your eyes widened slightly, and you noted the way Joshua's did the same. You made eye contact with Kevin as this happened. He seemed caught at a crossroads, unable to help or say anything. "I guess I'm okay at it."
"Liar," Kevin suddenly jumped in.
You sent him a look. Wait really?
He shrugged sheepishly. "I don't wanna downplay your abilities, dude. You're really good."
Oh. "Thanks, Kev," you said, blinking. Your heart warmed at the finger guns he sent your way. It was nice to know he had your back.
"Good! See? You and Josh should play doubles together." Your mother somehow got a racquet into your hand. She clapped her hands and ushered her two other children off their butts. "Come on, you two, you can be on Kevin's team."
"But that's not what doubles means, Mama—"
Joshua sidled up beside you with an apology in his smile. "Sorry, you don't have to do this if you don't want to. I don't want you to be forced to teach me or anything."
Guilt wormed itself into your stomach. "No, no! It's totally okay," you amended swiftly. "This all just happened really quickly, but I'd be so down to teach you badminton, if you'd like."
He bobbed his head up and down, patting the netting of his racquet. "Okay, yeah. That'd be really cool actually."
You nodded, returning his expression. "Cool."
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You and Joshua had somehow taken over the makeshift badminton court. The twins had gotten tired of the "big kids" playing too hard, and Kevin… actually, you didn't know why Kevin put down his racquet. But at some point, you noticed that he was just hanging out in a chair, sipping some kind of fruit juice as he observed you and Joshua. (That was what you assumed he was doing. There was a book propped open in his lap, but you hadn't seen him turn a page in a while. And he had put his sunglasses on, so you couldn't exactly see what his eyes were doing.)
You tracked the birdie as it flew over the net to your side. "Nice!" You praised, taking a few steps in the diagonal to hit the birdie back over with an easy backhand flick.
Joshua stumbled forward, but hit it back over. "Shoot," he said, barely catching himself before he crashed into the netting.
You chuckled, "Careful." You backed up and gave the birdie a gentle bump.
It sailed over the net, but it landed too close to it for Joshua to get a clean shot back over. He sighed as he bent down to pick the projectile up from the grass. "Dang. Nice hit, Yn."
Content with your shot as well, you walked over to the net to meet him. "Thanks, man."
"Hyungseo-ah!"
You watched as Kevin stood up from his chair at his mom's call. "Yeah, what's up?"
As she strolled over to him, she was reapplying sunscreen onto her arms and face. "We have more new neighbors. Since you're not doing anything, you should come and welcome them with me. There’s someone I think you should meet."
You and Kevin locked gazes for a second before he turned back to his mom. You didn't know why you kept looking at each other—this all felt like déjà vu, but maybe it was the fact that it seemed like your moms were separating you both instead of bringing you together that was throwing you off.
"Uhm, sure, Mom." He dropped his book into his seat and followed after his mom.
Your gaze trailed after him for a moment before you snapped back to reality. You swiped the sweat off your forehead with the back of your hand. "Sorry, where were we?"
Just then, Seokjin made his way down the lakeshore with baby Leena strapped to his chest again. He threw up an arm in greeting. "Hey, kids. You guys still at it?"
"Yup," you said back. "He's getting good at it!"
Joshua laughed lightly. "Ah, you flatter me. It's just 'cause Yn's a good teacher."
Seokjin's eyes flickered between the two of you. "Huh. I'm sure she is."
"Anyways," you coughed. "Did you just come from the new neighbor's house or something?" He hadn't arrived from the direction of his own house, which was on the other side of yours.
Your uncle by association gave his affirmative, one hand pressed gently on the back of his baby in his holster. "Of course! You know I'm too nosy to not have gone to introduce myself and see what's up. The couple has a girl around your age, Yn-ie. Their son is off in Paris for his job or something though."
The two men could probably see the gears in your brain turning. Another person who was around yours and Kevin's age? You really didn't want to read too much into it, but—you pushed the thought to the side. It probably wasn't what you were thinking, right?
"Uh, you good, Yn?" Joshua asked.
Your eyes shuttered. "Yeah. I was just thinking about something." You gestured with your racquet in a flourish. "How about another round?"
EPISODE FOUR: THE DAMSEL IN DISTRESS DEAL™
THE crickets were particularly melodious tonight. Their chirrups became lovely background music as you perched on the stairs of your back porch beneath the warm glow of the outside light. Moths swarmed the bulb, casting little shadow puppets along the wooden deck.
You were hunched over one of the few books you brought along with you for the trip. Your siblings liked to tease you for bringing “school work” on a summer trip, but these had been purchased out of your own interest. It was an anthology of experiences related to animal behavior. The certain piece that had originally caught your eye had been about the Alaskan husky’s primal nature to run, and their participation in dog sled racing. You’d come across it originally in a magazine on an airplane, finding yourself enthralled in a story of the stamina, determination, and hard work that these dogs faced in the brutal Alaskan winters.
When your plane landed, you had gone online and found more stories like them. Thus, the book in your lap and money down the drain. (Though, you would argue that it was money well-spent.)
“Warm night out.”
You startled, heart galloping in your chest, as Kevin appeared in your periphery and stepped into the light.
To his credit, he took on a sheepish sort of grin. “Oops, sorry. Probably should have given a warning or something.”
You pressed a hand to your palpitating heart and scooted over to give him room to sit on the step next to you. “No, it’s all good. I don’t think there was really any way that you could have warned me.” You were probably way too deep into your book to have even noticed if he was any quieter.
He took a seat beside you, posture mimicking yours with his forearms pressed onto his knees. “You’re right,” he murmured. “Whatcha reading?” He asked while inclining his chin toward the pages in your lap.
“Oh.” You kept a couple fingers wedged between the pages you were on as you flipped to the cover to show him. “It’s just this, uhm, collection of stories on animal behavior. Real fascinating stuff, actually, and a lot of it is kind of inspirational.” You tucked a strand of hair behind your ear, unsure of why you were always shy about telling people about something you were passionate about. You shouldn’t have thought so little of Kevin Moon, though. He never gave you any worries about being judged.
“Oh, that sounds neat,” he said, scooting closer. “Is it for your major? You’re still doing wildlife biology, right—or is it ecology?”
“Wildlife biology,” you confirmed. “It’s not for my major or anything, no. Just something I was interested in.”
A thought suddenly occurred to you and you were rewinding all of the things that had happened in the past couple of days. Before Kevin could comment further on the topic of majors, you piped up, “Actually, I wanted to talk to you about something.”
His eyes widened a smidge, his posture straightening. “Oh? What about?”
You felt around the porch deck for the receipt you had been using as a makeshift bookmark, hand flopping around before you snatched it up and slipped it into the pages of your book. You set the book aside. “Is it just me, or are our moms… you know…”
“Doing the Thing again?” He finished. He sighed with a little grimace, “Yeah, I think I’m seeing it.”
The “Thing” that both you and Kevin were referring to was none other than the very act of matronly matchmaking taking place between you and the new kids on the block. At least you could confirm that you weren’t overthinking it.
You recalled the events of earlier today when Kevin and his mom had come back to where everyone else was with the new family that had just arrived. The Xus were another party of just three—their oldest son was in Paris, as Seokjin reported, but their youngest, Serena, was yours and Kevin's age. It didn't take a rocket scientist to figure out who Kevin's mom wanted to introduce her son to.
“You know what’s crazy?” You said to him then, “On the car ride up here, I asked my mom—like, point-blank, you know?—to not try to matchmake us anymore.”
Kevin perked up. “Dude. That’s crazy, because that’s what I asked my mom on the car ride up here.”
You sputtered, “You’re kidding.”
“Great minds think alike,” he said, lip curling upward into a smile and his arms coming up in a halfhearted shrug. “But I should have known it wouldn't be that easy.”
Now that you were thinking back to your own conversation, you should have known something fishy was going on when your mom mentioned Kevin specifically… You only thought that she was being thorough in her understanding of what you were asking her to do, but turned out, it was only a loophole. “You’re so right,” you groaned and tilted your head backward. “Literally what are we gonna do?”
The two of you stewed in silence on this fine night.
There was one night, similar to this one, where you had sought each other out. You couldn’t remember what year it was—something close to sixth grade when both of you had the mind to realize the game your moms were trying to play. From that night came a pact of sorts, one that would hopefully try to steer each other away from a fate that neither of you were sure that you wanted yet. After all, eleven years old was a little premature to be talking about who you wanted to spend the rest of your life with, right?
Kevin leaned back onto his palms. “We need to make a new pact, I think.”
Your head swiveled over to him. “Amendments to the pact?”
“Either amend it or come up with a new one to fit our current situation,” he said. “A rescue protocol.”
A rescue protocol… you could see it begin to take shape in your head. The previous pact was different—an agreement between you and Kevin that you were both simply friends, no matter how many times your moms made you do chores together, or tie each other’s shoelaces, or swap numbers and emails and social media. And it had worked, for the most part; you were both still friends after all these years.
But this time would have to be different. Your moms weren’t driving you toward each other anymore.
“The Rescue Protocol—is that what we’re calling it?” You mused in an attempt to bring mirth to the conversation.
Kevin made a sound like a laugh. “Better than ‘the pact,’ I like to think.”
“How about the ‘Damsel in Distress Deal?’”
He let out an actual laugh this time. You got to watch his eyes turn up into crescent moons, the corners crinkling with pretty smile lines. His smile was always contagious, even after all this time. “The ‘Damsel in Distress Deal?’” He parroted. When he allowed the phrase to soak into his brain for a second, tongue massaging his bottom lip, he relented. “Okay, that’s actually not bad.”
You giggled. “So we either call it the Rescue Protocol or the Damsel in Distress Deal, trademark.”
“Trademark?” His reaction sent you into a flurry of snickers, hand clamped over your mouth so the sounds wouldn’t wake up your family. “What? Are we gonna advertise this idea to people?” He chuckled.
“It’s a good idea!”
“We don’t even know what the parameters are yet,” he sputtered. Kevin lightly punched your upper arm. “Silly goose.”
“Geese are not silly,” you found yourself replying. They could be mean creatures. “But I think they’re cute.”
“Jacob thinks they’re scary.”
You gave a playful roll of your eyes. “This Jacob guy again?” After a moment, you sighed, toeing the dirt on the bottom step with the tip of your shoe. “Hey, can I ask you a question?”
Kevin sobered a little, but the remnants of his merriment remained in the shine of his irises. “Shoot.”
“Are you…” You struggled to string the words together. There was a question you’d come up with already, but you didn’t know if it was too forward or not. “Are you ready for a relationship?”
The question caught him off guard. His gaze flickered from you, to the grass, to his lap, to the moon-soaked surface of the lake further down the hill. “I… I’m not sure, really,” he muttered, then added, “I think I would know the right person when I meet them.”
“Yeah,” you agreed.
“Or maybe not,” he shrugged. “Maybe I’ve already met the person I want to spend the rest of my life with, but the relationship just hasn’t gotten there yet.”
You pondered on that for a moment, then realized you agreed with that, too. If you already met the person you were meant to be with, the thought of a relationship was a little less daunting. You already knew this person. “So we’re in agreement then? This new pact is something we both want?”
“As usual, we are in agreement,” he nodded. “What’s our plan then? Fight fire with fire?”
You snorted. “Pretty much, right? We just have to, you know, swoop in whenever we can to counteract their movements. Help each other out, y’know?” You laughed at how ridiculous this all sounded. “I guess it’s really just doing what they’ve wanted us to do this whole time.”
Kevin grinned to himself. “Spend time together?”
“Yeah.”
“I’m down for that. You?”
“Yeah, man.” You shifted to angle your body toward him and stuck your hand out. “You still remember it, right?”
Kevin sent you an incredulous look, as if offended that you could think so lowly of him. He reflected your angled body, hand primed and ready. “Uh, yeah. Do you remember it?”
You clicked your tongue. “Of course, I do! It's the seal."
You knocked the back of your hand against his to signal the beginning of the handshake.
Like second nature, the two of you made your way through the unnecessarily (but also completely necessary) convoluted masterpiece that was your sixth grade handshake. It was what you used the first time you sealed the deal on the pact, and whenever you made any other agreements of significance (e.g. the Juice Pouch Accord of Eighth Grade). Now, it would seal the Rescue Protocol/Damsel in Distress Deal, too.
When the handshake combination finished (marked by twin flicks to the forehead—"Ow! You always flick so hard.”; “Yikes, hope that doesn’t leave a mark…”—and a… proper handshake), the only thing left to do was put it into motion.
Teasing, you sent him a look of approval. “You did remember.”
“Funny how you say that as if you have the better memory out of the two of us,” he quipped back with an unimpressed look.
You hummed your own amusement back to him, taking the book that you’d set aside earlier back into your lap but leaving it unopened. There wasn’t any signal in this area, so devices were practically useless, so books and board games and sports became the go-to for entertainment. It was what your parents originally liked so much about the place, and eventually you and your siblings. It allowed for moments between the moments like this… whatever this was.
Kevin leaned back onto his palms again, and the shadows and moonlight cut across his jawline like glass. “I didn’t think you’d be up so late.”
“Yeah,” you drawled and picked at a strand of grass sticking out between the boards of a stair step. “I couldn’t sleep for some reason and decided to read, but then I opened my window and realized it was a nice night out, so here I am.” You nodded to him, “You?”
He gave a soft sort of chuckle. “You know I never sleep.”
Your chest felt heavy all of a sudden. “Still have the sleeping issue?” You asked softly. It had been a big thing when he was a kid. It had started off as being a very light sleeper, but over time, you discovered that sometimes Kevin just did not get sleep.
“Yeah…” he said, "I'm usually able to sleep when I'm here though, y'know? The peace, the quiet, the familiarity—it all helps. It was just tonight that was out of the ordinary." When he glanced over at you, the side of his lip quirked upward. "Don't worry too much."
You'd always thought about the lake as your home away from home, your safe space. A part of you had always thought it was the same way for him.
“How could I not worry?" You asked, poorly masking your concern as you leaned over your knees and looked at him. “How did you ever get used to your place at uni?” There must have been some reason that he was able to survive over there.
The corners of his mouth curled upward into a smile. “I was lucky,” he admitted. “I met people who have become some of my best friends and family. I guess it’s just weird being so far away from them and it's catching up to me.”
As much teasing as you did about this Jacob character, you were glad Kevin had found him and his other friends. Being away from home like that could not have been easy. At least you could rest assured that he was taken care of over there.
He had grown so comfortable over there that even his subconscious missed them.
You shifted a little closer to him and gently leaned your head onto his shoulder. He seemed surprised at first, but relaxed and let you keep your head there. “That’s good,” you whispered. “I’m happy for you.”
A beat passed, and the crazy thought occurred to you that maybe you should have asked to do this first. “Is this okay?”
His hand warmed the top of your head. “More than okay.”
The two of you sat there like that for however long—you couldn’t really tell. Time passed by differently here, it seemed. Friends definitely comforted each other like this though, right? Right.
EPISODE FIVE: [SHENANIGANS ENSUE.]
"KEVIN, would you mind giving this snack pack to Serena?"
"Oh, I got it, Auntie!" You snatched the Ziploc bag of trail mix from off the counter where Kevin's mom had set it out. "I haven't properly introduced myself to her yet," you said as some kind of explanation.
Out of the corner of your eye, you saw Kevin look away to conceal his laugh at your inconspicuousness.
Today, the five families planned to go on a long nature hike as a large group. There was a specific path that your family, the Moons, and the Kims always took at least once every year that led out to a waterfall. It was a beautiful slice of nature, but then again, you thought this entire area was beautiful.
You swung out of the Moons' kitchen and out onto the back lawn where everyone was slowly gathering to take off. Eyes scanning the immediate area, you located Serena Xu standing off to the side plaiting her hair into a simple braid over her shoulder.
As you made your way over to her, your Uncle Jin suddenly appeared beside you. “You look like a woman on a mission, Yn-ie. What’s the sitch?”
Your brain took a second to register the reference. “Has Sana been watching Kim Possible or have you, Uncle?”
“And if I said it was both of us?” He sniffed. Sana was his eldest daughter, only three years old, but Jin and Yuna were very updated in the essential kids shows they wanted their daughters to watch.
“As you should,” you said with an indulgent nod. You turned your gaze over to your intended target.
Serena’s eyes wandered up from her hair and met your eyes, then glanced over at Jin. You hoped she didn’t think the two of you were ganging up on her or anything. Two new people at once could be intimidating.
“Hi, Serena, right?” You asked as you and Jin approached her.
She gave a small nod, pulling her braid’s end over her shoulder as she fidgeted with it. “Uh, yeah. And you’re Yn?”
“We already met yesterday,” Jin said chipperly.
Serena nodded again.
Your fingers danced along the edge of the Ziploc baggie in your hands, squeezing along the edge to make sure that it was closed properly. Your teeth ran over your bottom lip before you were passing her the bag in your hands. “Kevin’s mom made all of us snack bags, and I just wanted to say a proper hello.”
She accepted the bag, eyes wide as she inspected its contents through the clear plastic. “Oh, wow. Thank you; that’s really thoughtful.”
“Oh!” Seokjin illuminated like a lightbulb, clapping his hands loud enough to make both you and Serena wince. (You and she met each other’s eyes with awkward laughs.) “Didn’t you mention yesterday that you were pre-law?”
Your eyebrows flew upward. “Pre-law?” Your head bobbed up and down with a low whistle. “That’s cool.”
“Yeah, uh, I guess so,” she said. “It’s a little intimidating right now, if I’m being honest.”
“Yn!” Ripped out of the conversation, you excused yourself and found the source of your name. Your mom was perched on one of the picnic benches outside of the Moons’ place, slathering sunscreen on your brother’s face. Connor’s face was wrinkled in extreme displeasure as she patted the white cream into his skin with a slapping sound.
Always amusing.
Perched upon the picnic table next to them was none other than Joshua Hong. He sent you a friendly greeting wave.
“What’s up?” You asked, leaving Uncle Jin with Serena so you could make your way over to your chagrined little brother, your mom, and Joshua. “Where’s Dad and Alice? Hey Josh.”
He replied pleasantly, “Hey Yn.”
“Your dad’s grabbing something from the car with her,” she dismissed. “Would you mind showing Joshua where we put our bandages? We have so many of the little ones—”
“It’s just a little cut; I swear I’m fine!” Joshua chuckled good-naturedly. He showed you the slice in the side of his finger that was only a couple of centimeters long, but you could tell that he’d just recently cleaned it up and was holding it with a small piece of napkin.
Your mom made a noise of disagreement. “It’s going to get infected on the hike.”
You shuffled on your feet, offering him a small smile. “Sorry, man. I have to agree with her.”
“Thank you. You remember where the bandages are, right? You and Josh just go run up really quick together.”
You didn’t even realize when Kevin got here. “Oh, why don’t I just get one from my place for you?” Kevin waltzed into the conversation with an innocent expression, hands tucked into the pockets of his shorts, as he appeared at your side. “Since we’re just right here.”
Joshua gestured toward him with his hand-clutching-hand situation and hopped off from the picnic table top. “If you don’t mind.”
“Yeah, dude, it’s no problem.” Kevin’s hand met the place between your shoulders with a warm pat, and he led Joshua up to his family’s cabin for the bandages.
Your amusement followed after them as you watched them leave. Your mom sent you a curious look, eyes narrowed in question, and you could only shrug helplessly.
The hike commenced shortly after the boys got back from raiding the Moon’s medicine cabinet. Your dad and Alice returned sometime before they did, and Alice had once again requested you put her hair up in, as she said, “Something nice.” As if the wilderness would care about her nice hair-do, but you gave her a plait that matched Serena’s.
Your brother and sister kept near to you as you led the group through the beginning of the trail. Though you didn’t consider yourself as someone who exercised religiously, you never turned down a good foraging session. Your freshman environmental science course had presented you with plenty of opportunity to dive into the dense forest areas near the building. Even in the early reaches of the morning (8:30 morning labs were sometimes difficult to be disciplined about, but you were determined), when the fog clung to the forest floor and dew slipped down velvety oak leaves, you found yourself at peace.
At some point in time, Connor picked up a large fallen stick and used it as a hiking staff. “You shall not pass!” He declared after running a little ways ahead of you and mimicked the deepness of Gandolf’s voice.
You snorted as you passed by him and ruffled his hair. “Name the series that’s from and then we can talk, dude.”
“You’re never any fun!” Connor garbled, jogging after you.
You scoffed, pressing a hand against your chest in feigned offense. “I’m way more fun than you are,” you retorted.
“Okay, prove it! Make this more fun.”
“So you’re saying this hike isn’t fun?” You gasped.
Connor stabbed at the dirt path warn into the ground that weaved through the trees ahead for miles. It was by no means a challenging hike, just a lengthy one that required a bit of enthusiasm and endurance. “Well last time, you brought that thing—”
“Sugar water,” you supplied.
“—yeah, that one—and we caught butterflies!” Painted Lady butterflies were a common species of butterfly that was widespread among North America. Luckily, it hadn't been too difficult to find them.
“Woah, you guys caught butterflies last year? Without me?” Man, this guy was just everywhere today, you thought jokingly, as Kevin appeared on your other side with a boyish grin on his face. “That’s cool.”
“We didn’t catch them,” you corrected. It was more so a lure with the sugar water (a substitute for nectar), letting the kids see the insect up close, and then setting it free. You were no lepidopterologist—butterflies were cool, but no special interest of yours. “They just landed in my hand for a little. You should’ve been there to take pictures.”
Kevin hit the palm of hand against his forehead. “That’s what I forgot! I forgot to bring my camera on the hike.”
“Tsk tsk, what would your sister say now?” You chided playfully.
He pressed his lips together in a grimace. “Don’t bring her up—I can hear the echo of her voice as we speak.” To prove his point, he pressed his fingers to his temples, eyes fluttering closed, as if he really could hear his sister’s teasing from wherever she was.
You humored him with a laugh—
“Yn! I’m gonna climb that boulder!”
Okay, fun time was over. You tracked the sound of your brother’s voice, and with barely enough time to catch up to him, you set off the beaten path to follow. “Hey, you better be careful or Mom’s gonna put you on bedrest for the rest of the trip,” you chuckled as Kevin fell in step beside you. You said to him offhandedly, “Would you possibly mind…”
“Yeah, I got it.” He did a small jog over to the cluster of boulders your brother had begun to scale. Going bouldering wasn’t a new activity for you and your siblings, but you remembered that these ones were a little larger than your mom was usually comfortable with. You were grateful Kevin understood immediately.
He was already standing below where Connor was, playing along with whatever roleplay your brother had made up, all the while hovering in case he fell.
The rest of the party caught up to you at this point, and Alice, Uncle Jin, Sana, and even Josh converged upon the rock formation in a flurry of giggles and mirthful playtime. You observed the action with ill-concealed fondness for everyone there as they came together and helped one another climb to the topmost boulder as if it were the peak of Mount Everest. Something warmed within you at the sight.
On your left, Yuna, who was on Leena duty this morning, came to stand beside you. Some of the parents were pulling out cell phones to record all the chaos going on. “Why don’t you go up with them?” She asked, inclining her head to the rock formation.
Josh was just beckoning Kevin up with him, and you saw Kevin’s head turned back over his shoulder. When his eyes found yours, Kevin waved you over, too.
“I should,” you murmured in agreement.
Yuna hummed as she adjusted the little bonnet on Leena’s head. “You know, Kevin…” she began. You waited for her to finish, but she smiled instead, shaking her head. “Nevermind. Go have fun, you bean.”
You giggled at the nickname, then wasted little time going to join everyone else. You could probably ask her what she was going to say later.
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The evening found the group of you gathered on the shady back lawn between yours and the Moons’ cabin for dinner once again. The Xus and Hongs had all retired to their own respective houses for downtime, so it would just be the three original families. You perched a little ways away on the back stairs of your house’s porch, a bowl of peelable tangerines in your lap. At your feet, you had rolled the edges of a brown paper bag you’d found beneath the sink to use as a disposal. All of the compostable waste you and everyone else produced while here would become great fertilizer and mulch. It was something you usually had your siblings help with, especially before you left the lake.
Kevin had his cap turned backwards as he made his way over to you in flip flops. “That seat taken?” He asked with a nod toward the board next to you.
Your eyebrows rose. “All yours.”
“Thanks,” he beamed, doing a silly waddle, then sitting down next to you. He reached into the bowl on your lap for an orange, and you moved the compost bag between your bodies. “Your mom was talking about Josh again,” he said as he dug his thumb into the skin of the tangerine. Its juices sprayed into the air and released its sweet fragrance.
“Why am I not surprised?” You sighed with a shake of his head. “You know, he’s really good with my siblings though.”
“Oh, is he?”
You shrugged, shoveling a tangerine half into your mouth. “Mm—yeah,” you said once you’d swallowed. “But you’re also good with my siblings. I dunno, it was just an observation.” Based on what you saw on the hike, you could confidently conclude that your siblings agreed with both Kevin and Josh. They were both friendly beyond means, easy on the eyes, kind on the soul.
Kevin didn’t say anything for a beat, and still didn’t say anything until he’d finished the orange in his hands and picked up a new one. “I hear he’s going into medicine. I have a friend who’s going into medicine.”
“Which one?” You asked, then joked, “Don’t tell me it’s Jacob now…”
When Kevin gave you a sheepish expression, you shook your head, “Okay, now I think you’re obsessed with this guy.” All the teasing was in good fun, of course.
“He’s just my soulmate,” he lamented with a hand draped over his forehead for added effect. “No biggie.”
“Damn,” you laughed. You popped a wedge of tangerine into your mouth, eyes going to the sky for a moment as you pondered on something. “So you say that when Jacob met his current girlfriend, it was because of you.”
“Yup.”
“So you set them up? You matchmade them?”
He nodded. “I’m very proud of myself, actually. I take credit for all of their milestones and anniversaries. I better be the Best Man at their wedding, and—”
“But you matchmade them; doesn’t that make you a hypocrite?”
Kevin’s speech came to an abrupt halt. You watched, in blatant amusement, as his face contorted and arranged itself in the five stages of grief. “Oh my god… I am a hypocrite.”
For a moment, you felt bad for laughing at his blanched expression. “It doesn’t make you a bad person,” you assured him.
“It makes me a hypocrite.” He hung his head, but shot back up just as quickly. “Okay, but wait! It’s different.”
“Do tell.”
“It’s different because Jacob never told me he didn’t want to be matchmade.” The calculations taking place in his head were as stark to you, the observer, as if he was working it out on a white board. His eyebrows knitted together. “Yeah. That’s the difference. Plus, that match was fully successful, and he ended up putting in a lot of the work himself by the end anyway.”
You bobbed your head in agreement. “Fair enough.”
Kevin settled his chin on his hand, eyes slicing back over to you. “Aren’t you a hypocrite, too, then?”
You blinked. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”
His face said it all. “Jenna from fifth grade.”
Oh. It all came rushing back to you…
But before anything else could be commented on the matter (read: before you could go through your own miniature existential crisis like Kevin had), a presence appeared, squatting down between the two of you. “What—” Jin covered Leena’s ears as he sat down, “—is the mother-effing tea?”
You and Kevin immediately scooted over to make room for the uncle coming in hot. You moved the compost bag back to the other side of your leg.
Kevin chuckled. “You said ‘mother-effing.’”
“Aish,” he exhaled, wrinkling his nose up. “Yuna’s on relax mode right now and has two beers in her. I get a pass, okay? Now catch me up on all of the exciting stuff.”
You and Kevin traded glances. “What exciting stuff?”
Jin’s expression flattened into a deadpan. “Don’t be like that. You two have been so secretive lately; I wanna be let in on the secret stuff.”
“I don’t know if it’s necessarily a secret…” You drawled.
Kevin scratched the back of his head. “Uh, yeah. Well, we’ve kind of figured out that our moms are trying to set us up with Josh and Serena instead of each other now.”
You didn't know what you were expecting Uncle Jin to reply, but he gave a nod. "Ah, I can see that." He sucked in a breath through his teeth, "Why did they suddenly go 360 on the two of you? It seems kind of out of left field."
"Well, we kind of asked them to stop trying to get us two together."
Jin hummed. "Yah, that makes sense. It all makes sense now." He made an old-man noise out of his throat as he shifted his position and the way that Leena rested on his chest. You and Kevin buckled down and hung off his words. "They probably only mean well, you know that, right? Right. But I can see that you both are still uneasy about that, and I get that, too. So—I'll tell you what.
"I'll help you guys out," he said. "I think they already know I'm nosy enough to butt in everywhere, so it shouldn't be a problem for me to… tch tch, y'know—" He gestured very indulgently with his hands, "—do my thing—am I making any sense? It's been a long day."
Another look passed between you and Kevin, then you both shared a laugh, relief making your postures relax and your grins widen. "No, we understand completely."
It seemed like you just gained an ally.
EPISODE SIX: CAN I BE A ROCK IN MY NEXT LIFE? THANKS.
THERE was a collection of jet skis that someone around the lake owned, and Kevin's parents would rent them out once every summer for everyone to use. Of course, it was mainly for the older kids and adults; thus, your siblings and the little Kims were banned from partaking in the festivities, much to your siblings' chagrin. It was for safety reasons that they were forced to find some other method of entertainment for the day.
You trudged your way down the path from the Kims' house to yours. In your hand, you wielded the light blue stick of baby sunscreen Seokjin asked you to fetch for his girls, but based on the fact that Leena, Sana, nor Yuna were even out here, it was safe to assume it was really for him.
Those who were participating in riding jet skis, and some who just wanted to watch and soak up the summer sun, were gathered somewhere between your house and the Moon house again. The two properties shared a single dock made of wood faded out from the sun and washed by the lake water. You could recall summer after summer running down the pier and cannonballing into the water.
"Hey! I got your sunscreen!" You hollered as you neared the group down by the water, raising the sunscreen stick up in the air.
The five or so heads turned toward you at the sound of your voice. You didn't miss Kevin's presence specifically, his arms sticking out from the life vest strapped to his chest. You did not deign to look further.
Jin raised his hand. "My Savior! Thanks, Yn-ie!"
You tossed the sunscreen down to him and he caught it between both of his hands before beginning to slather the cream all over his face.
You noted the last life vest sitting on the edge of the dock closest to land and made a beeline for it.
Just as you descended the hill, your mom appeared in your view with an empty plate in her hands, the bottom ringed in a translucent red liquid. "Yn, honey. Can you do me a huge favor and chop up the last watermelon? I didn't realize we would need more. Your dad and Kevin's dad are driving into town right now for some extra provisions and an extra large watermelon."
"Oh, sure." Your eyes skittered to the vest on the dock, but you realized slicing the watermelon wouldn't take too long.
You took the plate from your mom without further comment and began making your way up the hill to your house.
As you slid the door open, the sound of chatter carried from the living room floor. Eyes peered up from where they were seated, surrounding the coffee table on the floor. A colorful array of beads and string was strewn over the surface, and you came to a distinct conclusion as to where all the non-jet-skiers had gone.
"Hello everyone," you mused, closing the screen door behind you.
Josh was the first to say hello back. "Wanna join us? We're making friendship bracelets." He lifted the craft in his hands as if the beads and materials displayed weren't proof enough.
You leaned over the back of the couch. "Looks like fun! Maybe I will."
Outside by the lake, Kevin monitored the back door of your cabin for when you would make your way back out. He had been wanting to race you on a jet ski ever since the owners brought them over for everyone to use.
There were a grand total of five people surrounding the opening to the dock: Kevin and his mom, your mom, Jin, and Serena. Everyone except for the moms were strapped in lifejackets in preparation to board one of the two jet skis sitting in port.
"Huh," Jin said as he craned his head up in the direction Kevin's was in. "Wonder what's taking her so long."
"I'm sure she's just taking her time or something." Kevin pushed off of the post he was leaning against. "I'll go check up on her—"
“Oh, no-no-no! It’s okay,” your mom protested, her body already turn-tailed to head up to the house. Even Kevin’s mom made a gesture for him to stay put. “We’ll go check up on Yn.”
Kevin’s mom then gestured with her arm toward Serena, who had wandered off further down the dock to inspect one of the vehicles waiting in the water. “Why don’t you go help her with the jet ski?”
“And me!” Seokjin boisterously slung an arm around his cousin-in-law’s shoulders and swung him toward the entrance of the pier.
Kevin’s eyes went wide when he almost tumbled face-first into the hardwood. “Shit,” he sputtered. “Uh, Uncle Jin?”
“Yep?”
“That sounded fishy to you, too, right?”
Jin let out a laugh and patted Kevin’s shoulder in consolation. “Yep.”
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“I feel like I haven’t seen you all afternoon.” The words left your mouth as you blocked the unforgiving golden hour sun with a hand to your forehead. The light at this time of day gleamed across the surface of the lake and gave the illusion of a molten pot of gold. You imagined swimming in it, dipping your toes into its warm innards from the end of the dock.
Kevin stood at the edge of the lake’s shoreline with his hair dried from a day of jet skiing, a fresh T-shirt over his chest and the lifejacket from earlier nowhere to be seen. That, along with the jet skis. Those had been returned a little over an hour ago. “We were off doing our separate things, I guess,” he said, his arms folded across his chest. “Speaking of, where’ve you been? You went to cut watermelon and never came back.” He added a small laugh to his words, hoping you wouldn’t think he was bothered by the fact that the two of you didn’t get to hang out on jet skis together.
“Oh, heh.” The sheepishness in your voice made him glance over at you. You didn’t know why you were suddenly getting so shy about it, but from the pocket of your shorts, you withdrew a small piece of beaded string, tied at the end in one of those fancy loops that were adjustable. You didn’t know how it was done; Joshua had done something with the end like magic. “Yuna, Josh, and the kids were all inside making friendship bracelets and they kind of roped me into it.”
“Ah.”
“This one’s for you,” you said, holding it out to him. It was a quirky piece with white block letter beads strung together next to acrylic star and pony beads. You’d scavenged a crescent moon somewhere amongst all the pandemonium, and it sat next to the letter N on the chain.
Kevin peered at you and his irises gleamed with the brilliance of golden hour. He frowned in joy, delicately accepting the chain from you with his bottom lip jutted out in a combination frown-pout. “You’re incredible,” he gushed as he inspected the little gift. “Dude, I’m honestly so touched. This is so cute.”
You broke out into a grin, your heart bursting with pride in your chest. “Glad it’s not cringy.”
“I’m offended for you,” he scoffed, aghast. “How could you think this is cringy?” It was probably a genuine question, but you kept silent as you watched him loop the end of the bracelet around his wrist and struggled to figure out how to tie off the end with one hand.
You stepped forward, and he stuck his hand out to you. “Shua showed me how this works,” you murmured, wracking your brain for the quick how-to Joshua showed with his own wrist. (You had been too confused to ask him to see it done again, and only nodded and smiled.)
“Shua?”
“Mm, yeah, apparently he makes a lot of friendship bracelets, especially for friends at school.” Your tongue stuck out of the corner of your mouth as you tried something and… “Ta-da!”
With the bracelet secured onto his wrist, Kevin beamed like a kid on Christmas, and held it up to show it to the setting sun. “It’s great—it’s perfect. Thank you, Yn.”
It was some sort of cosmic magic that corralled everyone back down to the shoreline again, but this time, with all of the kids and non-jet-skiers, as well. Another tradition that your party liked to share every year at the lake was rock-skipping. Perhaps it was more of just an activity than a tradition, but it was something that none of you failed to remember to do whenever you were up here. Since you were a kid, you had been practicing to hone your technique.
Your siblings and the Kims, especially, all ran up to the shoreline beside you and Kevin, and the search for the perfect throwing rock began. In the chaos of merriment and childlike glee, the lot of you trudged into the cooling water of the lake’s shallow shore.
“I know you just gave me the coolest friendship bracelet ever,” said Kevin from beside you as he sifted through the rocks beneath his flip flops, “but I hope you know that I’m gonna crush you this year.”
You snorted. “Okay, Kevin.”
“No, I’m serious!” You guffawed at the sight of his expression; he’d even stood up straight in the water, a pair of flat stones in either hand. “My friend YH!Yn—she’s an engineer, right—”
“Oh, so you’re gonna win by cheating?”
“Nuh-uh,” he rolled his eyes, unimpressed by your posturing. “She showed me this video online. You know Mark Rober? She’s a huge fan, but that’s besides the point. The point is that the video taught me the perfect technique to rock-skip.”
Something in you liked to think that was still cheating, but then again, neither of you had ever really established any ground rules to this, and certainly none about doing research. Your eyes narrowed. “Explain yourself.”
Kevin decided between one of the two rocks in his hands with a brief peek at both of them, before discarding the one in his left hand back into the water with an anticlimactic sploosh. “You’re supposed to launch the rock so it hits the surface of the water at a twenty-degree angle.”
Joshua trudged into the water near both you and Kevin with the sleeves of his plaid over-shirt rolled past his elbows. “I don’t even know what kind of rock to look for, and you guys are bringing trig into this?”
“Oh my god, don’t even get them started,” Jin grumbled from a handful of meters away from the three of you. He kicked through the shallow water with his eyes pinned to the ground in his own search for a rock to skip. “Yn almost gave me a black eye one year.”
“That was an accident and I was ten!”
“Yeah, well rocks hurt!”
Joshua bent down slightly and scooped up a rock from the water. He considered it for a minute, taking in its size, its weight, and how pretty it was. “I guess this can work. So do you guys have, like, a training boot camp for beginners or something?” He chuckled.
“I can show you,” you offered once you’d decided on your own rock for the first round.
“Tch,” Kevin huffed, “if you wanna show him the wrong way to do it.”
Your jaw unhinged. “If you keep this up, I will take back that friendship bracelet, Moon Hyungseo.”
Jin covered his mouth with one of his hands and sidled up next to Joshua. “Ooh, she used the government name.” That coaxed another laugh out of the Los Angeles boy.
Kevin held his decorated wrist to his chest. “You can pry it from my cold, dead hands.”
Suffice to say that when it came down to it, Kevin did have the better technique. There were really four main things to consider when rock-skipping, one of them being that the rock ideally should hit the water at twenty-degrees, as Kevin had mentioned before. Though, you did have to give yourself some credit for managing to work your way up to thirteen skips in a row without the help of an engineer friend.
EPISODE SEVEN: ALWAYS TREAT YOUR PLANTS WITH CARE
VACATION granted you the express permission to be the laziest bum in the world. After three years of college work, sometimes it was nice to have even a single day to yourself to do what you always wanted to: relax. In a world that moved as fast as this one, it was nearly impossible to take breaks without feeling the aching guilt of a day without productivity.
But there was something about the lake… you didn't know. Maybe it was just because years of coming here and associating it with the ease and carefree air of childhood that made it easier to sleep in and feel the sun on your toes.
The house and the neighboring ones were quiet this late morning. At ten or so, the Kims had swept up your siblings and their children and towed them off to town for ice cream and provisions. (You hoped they remembered to grab you some bird seed. You still had yet to replenish the bird feeders around the lake.) You weren't sure where your parents were off to, but you recalled them briefly mentioning a visit to the hidden swing at Lookout's Peak about a three mile hike from here. That meant that you had the whole house to yourself.
And what else did that mean? That you would not be in the house.
When it hit noon, you ate a quick lunch at the kitchen counter before gathering up your supplies to head outside. There was always a spare picnic blanket stashed in the hallway closet, and you grabbed a book, your neglected sketchbook, and a pencil to come along with you.
The weather was perfect, you liked to think—temperate, and not popsicle-melting, with a hint of a breeze wafting through the boughs of the oak trees. You trudged your way over to the largest oak tree with the most amount of shade, gunning to get some full relaxing done when you realized that you were not as alone as you thought you were.
You and Kevin locked eyes from where he sat against the trunk of the tree, his iPad left at his side and his camera being fiddled with between his fingers. The friendship bracelet you gave him the other day still hung around his wrist.
"Hi," he grinned. "I thought you went into town with the twins."
"Ah, nah" you sighed pleasantly as you shifted the things in your arms, "I decided to sleep in. You?"
"Same here." He amended, "Well, as much as someone like me can sleep in." He gestured to the picnic blanket bundled over your arm. "How about I help you with that?"
With teamwork (because that made the dream work), the two of you laid out the picnic blanket on the shady grass beneath the oak tree, overlooking the view of the lake. You settled yourself atop it while Kevin moved his things beside you; shoes were discarded at the edge, so you both sat comfortably on the blanket, half-facing the other.
You reached for your sketchbook, inclining your chin toward the DSLR now sitting abandoned as he picked up his iPad. "What were you up to before I got here?"
"Oh, uh, just looking through some photos I took this morning to maybe use as a reference," he said, twirling his Apple pencil between his fingers. "I keep forgetting to take pictures on this trip."
"Maybe it's a good thing," you offered. You tucked a lock of hair behind your ear and flipped to a blank page. "Let's you live in the moment, y'know?"
"Yeah. I guess so." He tapped the end of his pencil against his cheek. You were never the type for fancy technology and equipment, mainly because you were a little stubborn, but nothing could beat a good pencil and paper. "I'm gonna draw you," he suddenly declared.
A giggle bubbled out of your chest. "What? Me?"
"Yeah, why not?"
"Well then, I'm gonna draw you."
His eyebrows shot up, an amused smile worming onto his face. "You do you, honey."
The two of you, coincidentally, came to share quite the handful of interests. One of them was sketching, and you liked to give credit to your ecology and biology classes at school that gave you the time to practice your drawing skills, even if super accurate drawings weren't always required. It just gave you an excuse to combine two things you loved.
You never did pick up how to use a DSLR though. At least, not like Kevin knew how to.
You sat there for a moment with your cheek to your fist and your eyes glued to the man across from you. Drawing people was difficult—it was always the subtle details that threw you overboard, the movement of the hands and fingers, the crevices in the wrinkle of one's eyes, the… the look. The thing that made them look like a human being.
Kevin had always been a beautiful subject matter. His bone structure was near perfect in your eyes; his smile was awful to draw just because it was so pretty, and you couldn't do it justice. You could never achieve the right curl of his lips, or infuse it with his humility. And even now, you watched the way his eyelashes fell so gently over his eyes and the dusting of pink falling across his cheekbones…
"You're staring."
You blinked, breaking out of your daze. "I'm studying my subject," you clarified pointedly and began to sketch out a rough outline of his head. A portrait would do just fine for the day.
Kevin mimicked your position from earlier where he leaned in slightly and rested his cheek against his fist. "There was this internship I turned down this summer."
His words made you glance up from your paper for a moment.
He continued on, straightening, then absentmindedly sketching out an outline for your face. "It was supposed to be in New York, at this studio, but…" He blew air out between his lips, "I don't know; I couldn't do it. It was a great opportunity and it didn't call to me, but I feel so guilty about not even trying."
You waited a beat in case he wanted to continue. You could see the conflict warring across this face, the subtle flex in his jaw at his frustration—with the portrait or himself, you weren't sure.
"Sorry, I don't know why I suddenly just thought of that," he said to you. "I was just thinking about this place and not being here last year, and I think my brain just went to that."
You looked over at him in earnest. "I feel you, I mean… some things just aren't meant to be, and you shouldn't force it. That's how you get burnt out, y'know?"
"Yeah," he murmured in agreement.
"I was looking at an internship, too," you piped up with a shape exhale. "I—I didn't get it, clearly, but uhm…" It still hurt.
Kevin frowned. "Oh, man. I'm sorry, Yn. I feel like I'm just complaining now that—"
"No, oh my gosh, no!" You hurried to interrupt him. "Don't be silly," you said gently, "you shouldn't invalidate your feelings like that. Some things just really aren't meant to be." It didn't mean it hurt any less that they weren't, but maybe this was the path you were meant to take instead. "It's something I'm coming to terms with, too, but don't compare your troubles against mine. Please."
He worried his bottom lip between his teeth, and it took him a little to finally try for a half smile. "You're gonna get the next one."
You smiled back at him. "Thanks. And you'll find one that suits you."
"I hope so."
"Do you ever worry about," you began as you played around with the slightest curve of his nose on your paper, "not being who people want you to be?"
He hummed. "What do you mean?"
"Like, successful. I'm not really sure where I'm going with this." You didn't know where this had sprouted from in the first place, but one insecurity in particular had nested in the inner cavities of your chest and made itself a home. As someone who wanted to be at wildlife encampments, not catering to fancy rich dogs in a clinic, your path wasn't conventional. You were becoming a veterinarian, but your parents always thought you would end up someplace nice with a pay that was equally nice. Something practical, something they didn't have to worry over. Your calling was… elsewhere though. Somewhere a little more difficult to reach without the prying eyes and mouths of those around you.
Kevin marinated on it. "I think… the two of us are kind of similar in that way. We're both not taking on things that people have expected of us."
Out of everyone you knew, you had a feeling he would be one of the few who could empathize. "There's—there's this thing I want to do," you said. You couldn't figure out the words to string your thoughts into coherent speech; you felt like it would never come out right. But Kevin was patient. "I've always wanted to go on safari expeditions, and observe wildlife in the wild, and do research, and work with conservatories. It feels so unattainable sometimes, when I think about the people looking at me and expecting something good. Does that make sense?"
He gave a thoughtful nod, his Apple pencil tucked behind his ear for the time being. "Yeah, that makes sense. I remember you talked about it before."
That rang a bell. "When I made you watch the David Attenborough Our Planet doc series," you mused. In association, your brain sparked images of late nights, blue-light screens, and flashlights beneath blanket forts. You had been fully convinced Kevin would say the documentary series would be boring like everyone else, but to your pleasant surprise, he had been just as enthralled as you'd been.
"You didn't make me," he smiled. "I liked it."
Your chest warmed. "I still have it downloaded on my phone if you wanna watch."
He screwed his face up in amusement, shaking his head. "You're one of the biggest dorks I know. And I know so many dorks now."
"I'm still your favorite dork though, right?" You smiled down at your paper when you were satisfied with how his eyes turned out.
"Always."
A beat passed, and from your periphery, you saw him tap the blanket in front of you to get your attention.
"Hey, you're gonna be okay," he said. "One day, you will go hide in a bunker in the Siberian winter to wait for tigers like a crazy person—"
"Okay, wait, out of all the examples you watched in the doc, you chose—"
"Anyways!" He grinned at the look you sent him, unfazed. "We're both gonna be okay, alright? We're chasing dreams, and sometimes the chase is hard, but the reward is sweet."
You knew he was right; of course he was right. Talking things out was always a good idea, especially with a trusted person, and who better to trust than Kevin Moon? You had friends who understood, but not really understood.
You reached for his pencil with the end of yours and you bumped ends like ET. The corners of your lips curled upward as you met his gaze, and you were struck by the softness in his rich, chocolate irises. No sketch, painting, portrait could do those beautiful eyes justice. "Don't call me a nerd for this."
"No promises."
You fixed him with a look. "There's this thing that plants do called phototropism. Because plants need light to synthesize into food and energy, they often turn and grow towards the nearest light source. So even in, let's say, a dark hole in the ground—if there's a crack in the roof that brings light in, the plant will grow in that direction, and probably grow its way out." You cleared your throat. "Thanks for showing me the light."
Kevin's eyes shone big and wide, doe-like you liked to say, almost in awe of the explanation of a basic function plants performed to survive. But twisted in a certain way, and one could apply it to everyday non-plant life, as well.
"Now how can I possibly call you a nerd after that?" His voice went raspy and he had to clear it, too. "I think I'm getting misty-eyed," he said, fanning his eyes.
You chuckled at his antics. "Oh, hush. I guess it's my way of saying thanks for reminding me I'm not gonna be a failure." It was scary how often you thought about it, especially at college.
Kevin reached over and warmed one of your hands with his. "You're not gonna be a failure, Yn. I promise you that."
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All of the kids were asleep in the back of the Kims' minivan, and it took two trips back and forth between the car and the living room to transfer all four sleeping munchkins. By the time Jin and Yuna were done, the former was certain he was going to need a cane much earlier in his life than previously anticipated.
He held his back as they made their way out onto the back porch. "I think I'm aging faster," he said to his partner.
Yuna sputtered out a laugh. "Aye, so dramatic, and for what? You're gonna survive."
"No sympathy," he sighed melodramatically as he hung off her frame. "I wonder where everyone else is."
His voice trailed off as they stood on the porch and overlooked the valley below. Just further out, they could easily see the occupants of the big oak tree between yours and the Moons' houses. You and Kevin sat slightly angled toward one another, not quite sitting next to each other, but not quite facing each other either.
The laughter was apparent on your faces as Kevin showed you something on his iPad. You grabbed the screen with ill-concealed delight, your eyes lighting up like a pair of fireflies. "No, oh my god, the little sprout on top of my head! You didn't!"
Yuna murmured softly to her lover with a chuckle, "Should we go say hello?"
Seokjin adjusted his position so now his arm rested around her shoulders. A smile etched onto his face at the view; he was so fond of the very thing neither you nor Kevin could see just yet. "Well, how could you possibly want to break that up?"
EPISODE EIGHT: NOD AND SMILE… YUP.
YOU weren't really sure why it took so long before you all deigned to take a proper dip in the lake, but as they said, better late than never.
The sun beat down on the little lake population, even at ten in the morning, which made it perfect weather to go swimming. Your house was a-bustle with life, thunderous footsteps, and motherly yelling to her children of “You better all have sunscreen on!” You were just finishing up the task yourself, rubbing in the last handprint of sunblock onto your calf before you were grabbing your towel at the end of your bed and heading out.
You caught Alice coming down the stairs with her floral one-piece on and a set of blue goggles strapped to her head. This morning, her hair was in two braids. “Do you have sunscreen on?” You asked her as you opened the back screen door.
“Yes,” she groaned as if this was the hundredth time she’d been asked that question today. Knowing your family, it probably was the hundredth time. “Do we still have the flamingo floatie?”
“We can probably pop down to the shed and see,” you suggested. You blinked in surprise at the person you found leaning against the railing of your back porch. “Why hello there.”
Joshua glanced up from the piece of string in his hands that he had tied at the ends to form one, large ring. “Hi guys! Either of you ladies know how to play Cat’s Cradle?” His hands slipped in between the string so that the ring rested on the backs of his fingers. In a movement that sent a wave of nostalgia down your spine, he maneuvered his hands through the string to form the zigzag pattern correspondent with the beloved childhood game.
“Ooh! Me, me!” Alice bounced around on the balls of her feet and rushed over to where Josh was to pick out the next pattern.
The screen door behind you opened up again as soon as you stepped foot onto the deck. Your dad appeared with your little brother, both of whom were dressed in rash guards and swim trunks. Your dad hustled his son along. “Yn-ah, we’re going down to the shed to get swimming things. Wanna come?”
“Wait, Daddy, can we get the flamingo floatie?” Alice asked your dad. Joshua finished up the next pattern, and your sister was quick to grab the next.
“Sure. We have to go now, though.”
With little else left to say or do, your dad ferried your little siblings off and around the house to where the shed was. It was tucked out of the way somewhere between your house and the Kims’ place.
You sidled up beside Joshua and slung your towel over your shoulder, noting his tank top and shorts. “You going for a swim with us?”
He gestured to his attire, nodding. “Seems like it. My parents wanted to run into town to do some shopping, see the sights. Your mom mentioned last night that you all were planning to go swimming today, so I thought I’d tag along, if that’s okay.”
“Yeah, man—it’s totally cool.”
You gazed far out toward the lake down the lawn. There were already a few people there, including Kevin and the Kims. Sana and Leena were already frolicking around in the water with their dad, while Yuna and Kevin stood off to the side on the dock. It seemed that Yuna had brought down a pair of foldable chairs to set up there, perhaps to soak up a little sun.
The two of them exchanged a couple more words before Yuna left him there so she could go pick up Leena from falling face-first in the water. Leena was still an infant, after all.
You decided that this would be a good time to run and join him, but your thoughts slowed to a halt when Kevin picked up the bottom hem of his shirt and pulled it over his head. You even heard Joshua beside you lose his breath. The sunlight had to be a paid actor or something, because the way it glowed across your friend’s shoulders, enunciating the firm muscles in his back, had to be illegal in nature.
Joshua’s low whistle of appreciation met your ears. “Wow… he’s ripped.”
You nodded absentmindedly. “Yeah.” Whoops, did you say that out loud?
The man simply chuckled and bounded down the porch. “C’mon, Yn. Let’s go join them before he catches you staring.”
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If there was anything else that you and Kevin took seriously besides rock-skipping, it was the game Marco Polo. The rules were simple: an elected tagger would play with their eyes closed, yelling out “Marco” in order to locate other players in the water. The tagger had three or five opportunities to open their eyes (this was enforced for safety reasons) in order to tag everyone. Those who were not the tagger were required to reply with “Polo” in response to the tagger’s call.
Boundaries of the game ranged from your house to Kevin’s house, and no hiding beneath the dock. (Only the tagger could pass beneath that zone.)
By the time it was Kevin’s turn to tag, nearly an hour and a half had gone by, and you could feel the sun’s rays seeping into you. The heat was getting to you, and by the looks on everyone else’s faces, it was getting to them, too. But… one last round never hurt anybody.
"Are you guys ready?" Kevin's mom stood on the dock with her hands on her son's shoulders. Kevin's eyes were screwed shut where he sat on the edge of the dock, his feet swinging where they dangled over the water. Everyone stood scattered in the water, biding their time before Kevin's mom let him hop in.
She surveyed the surrounding water for nods of confirmation. You lingered just at the outer edge of the boundary, face half in the water with your eyes peeking out to hide your smile. You would swim back in should he come this way, but the buoy behind you kept you from cheating.
When she was satisfied with what she saw, she patted him on the shoulders. "Okay, Kevin."
He lowered himself into the water. "Marco!"
"Polo," came the wary response, a voice from every corner and reach of the boundary, it seemed.
He honed in on a voice—not yours, it seemed, but Uncle Jin's—and slowly treaded over toward that direction. You saw your uncle's eyes widen in fear, and he ducked under the water for a swift second to attempt at a silent getaway.
"I can hear you," Kevin chuckled as he swung his arm over his head to adopt a freestyle stroke. The tone of his voice sounded awfully menacing.
"YAH! GET AWAY FROM ME!" Jin screeched, no longer trying to stay quiet.
One by one, Kevin picked people off. Yuna had a little disadvantage since she had Sana clinging to her back the whole time, so she was given a merciful second life. But when she was caught once more, it was onto dry land for her and her daughter.
Kevin treaded water on the other side of the boundary. In the water, it was just you two.
"Fighting, Yn-ie!" Jin cheered from the shore. A towel was draped over his shoulders with Sana sucking on a watermelon by his leg.
You saw your siblings and Josh raise up their fists in encouragement. "Get him, Yn!"
"Wow, thanks guys," Kevin replied dryly, shaking the water out of his hair. His eyes were miraculously still closed; you had no idea how and when he got so good at this. He still had one more opportunity to open his eyes.
You grinned. "Are you sure you're not cheating by the way?" You drawled with a feigned look of consideration, as if he could see what you looked like.
He gasped. "Me? Cheating? My abilities are far greater than the need to cheat."
"Okay, prove it."
Why did the universe curse you with such a big fucking mouth?
A swear left you as he launched himself across the safe zone. It was like he knew exactly where you had been hovering in order to reach his ridiculously long arms over his head to try and tag you. You gunned out of the way, narrowly missing the dock as you backstroked back from where he came to avoid him.
"Marco!"
"Screw you—polo!"
His white teeth glistened as he grinned, eyes closed completely shut still. Damn. "I can smell fear."
"Sometimes you can be so dramatic," you taunted.
"Now that's just hurtful." And he took it personally.
Around and around you both went, lakewater thrashing as your arms and legs kicked and pumped as hard as you could. You felt so agile and free at times, a dolphin in your own right.
There was a lull in the game for a minute when you managed to evade Kevin's grasp yet another time. He was patrolling the other side of the dock while you loitered just around the corner, by a post. You could hear on land that everyone had turned their attention away from yours and Kevin's competitiveness in favor of the bag tossing boards Kevin's dad brought out.
"Oh, Yn," he smiled, brushing a hand through his hair absentmindedly. "I'm gonna get ya."
If you weren't worried about being so close to him, you would have thrown a retort right back.
But there was another poor, poor hinge to your plan, and that was the very core of the game you were playing.
He whispered, "Marco."
You screamed internally. "Polo," you whispered, barely audibly.
His head whipped in your direction, and before you could even blink, he used his shortcut beneath the dock to yank your wrist back toward him. "Gotcha!"
"Goddamn it," you groaned as you rested up against the post behind you. The water in this area was just shallow enough that your feet could reach the bottom.
Kevin chuckled as he finally opened his eyes. He blinked feverishly to adjust to the sunlight, then ran a hand through his slicked-back hair. He was so close that you could see the water droplets on his head dribble down the sharp slope of his nose. He took in his surroundings, a sly kind of smirk curling up onto his face. "No hiding beneath the dock, Yn."
"I technically wasn't beneath the dock," you shot back.
"Mhm," he pressed his lips together, brows furrowing. He moved closer and braced one arm against the post above your head. "Say I believe you."
You brushed the sudden butterflies in your stomach away as the heat melted your brain (and not Kevin). "That sounds like you don't believe me."
"Well, either way…" He brought a finger close to your face and tapped your nose. You could have sworn you saw his eyes dart downwards for a second, away from your eyes, toward your mouth. "I win."
EPISODE NINE: KINDLING FOR ALL KINDS OF FIRES
A campfire was always in order.
There were quite a few things that needed to be done before it could happen, however. One of the few things on the list just happened to be going out to find firewood, as well as filling up the bird feeders you left hanging out in the forest beyond. You could kill two birds with one stone. (Definitely not literally though. You hoped you never needed to kill two birds with one stone unless it was for pure survival purposes.)
The bird seed you'd requested to be brought back was… somewhere around here. You couldn't remember where exactly Auntie Yuna said they put the bag, but you would go hunting for it.
You meandered through the first floor of your lake cabin, gradually approaching the kitchen area where you heard voices. As far as you were aware, your parents were holed up in the kitchen with Kevin’s parents, as well as Kevin himself. Your siblings were probably either upstairs or at the Kims’ place. Probably.
“—know Judy’s daughter, right?” You recognized your mom’s voice among the fray. By this time, you stood in the middle of the living room with your hands on your hips. Where in the world was that sneaky bag of bird seed?
Kevin’s mom replied next, “Ah, she’s doing that drawing major or something, right? I forgot what it’s called—”
“Animation,” supplied her husband.
“Yes, that’s the one.” A clinking of metal on china; they were most likely digging into the trifle cake that was assembled earlier in the day.
“I hear there’s something going on and it’s getting more difficult to find work for them.”
A disgruntled sound. “Yah. That's the risk that comes with those art majors. If she had gone into bioengineering like Judy wanted her to, then she wouldn’t be worrying so much.”
You paused from your position in the living room. From your vantage point, you got a clear view into only part of the kitchen, but it was where Kevin lingered with his back to one of the cabinets. He had a bowl of dessert in one hand, the other using the tines of his fork to prod at a bite of cream and cake. His head was tilted down though, and you caught his periodic glances toward the part of the kitchen you couldn’t see where the adults probably were, prattling on and on as if he weren’t standing right there.
Your heart sunk to the pit of your stomach.
Why was he subjecting himself to this? Why didn’t he just pick himself up and leave—? The thought came to you that maybe he thought he deserved to hear this.
Having surveyed the living room enough to know that the bird seed wasn’t here, you did happen to note the presence of his camera sitting on the coffee table. You snatched the device up and headed for the kitchen.
“I think it’s good to cultivate creativity, but there’s a difference between a career and hobbies—”
“Psst.” You grappled onto the side of the doorway, quietly catching Kevin’s attention.
His head perked up at the sound and his eyebrows shot up in question. He offered the bowl in his hands to you. Want some? He mouthed.
You shook your head, then used your free hand to wave him over. Bird seed?
He seemed to understand. With one, massive bite, he finished the rest of his bowl, deposited it in the kitchen sink, then quietly slipped out of the room with you.
When the two of you were in the clear and you were following him over to the closet beneath the stairs (damn, had you really forgotten that this closet existed?), you handed him his camera. “I’m invoking rescue protocol,” you told him.
Kevin accepted his camera with a furrowed brow, watching as you opened up the closet door and found a canvas sack of birdseed sitting there. Huzzah! “Wait, but…” He considered you for a moment, and a slow smile slid onto his face. He ducked his head and threw his camera strap around his neck. “I appreciate you. Have I told you that?”
“And I—” You grunted as you picked the bag up into your arms and used your foot to kick the door closed. “—appreciate you. How’d you know this was where the bird seed was?”
“I just remembered what Uncle Jin said,” he told you with a shrug.
The two of you meandered out of the backdoor and onto the porch in a silent agreement to go fill some bird feeders together. The forest at this time of day was streaked in golden sunlight, emerald green leaves painted over in an amber wash of glitter. It felt warm and comfortable like autumn, but with the color palette of summer. The air was fresh, not crisp, and there was still a dollop of pollen floating around in the air from the tailend of spring.
You and Kevin entered the forest proper, and you shifted the bag into your right hand when you finally got the bag’s handles up and at ‘em. “I know the protocol wasn’t meant for those kinds of situations,” you started.
Kevin let his camera rest in his hands at midriff once he had fiddled with the settings enough to his liking. “I know.”
“They’re wrong, you know?” You turned to look at him as you stopped at the first feeder and let the sack of seed and grain fall to your feet with a thump against the earth. Before you opened up the bag, however, you peered up into the wooden house hanging from the branch, slobbered in messy paints and melting smiley faces. There wasn’t a speck of grain or seed left in this one. Satisfied, you bent down to rip the bag open and take out a scoop with your hands.
The shutter of a camera lens fired. He sighed, lowering the camera so he could inspect the test shot he took. “I’ve come to terms with that—all of their opinions, I mean.” He lifted the viewfinder back up to his eye and took another shot as you shoveled the bird seed into the hole. A small stream of it missed and tumbled to the forest floor. “Sometimes I do think like that, though. Whether or not I should have stuck with psychology and become a teacher instead of photography.”
You folded the edge of the bag over itself after dusting your hands off, and the two of you continued onward. “Are you happy with photography though? Do you like the things you’re learning, the work you’re doing?” That was one of the few metrics that kept you clinging onto your dreams—your hands were getting scraped and sweaty holding onto the side of the cliff face, but even though your shoe slipped against the ledge and threatened a long drop, you held on. Some days, you thought it was a sad, desperate effort; others, you found extra strength to dig your soles in.
He didn’t have to think much before answering. “Yeah, I do. It’s… it’s fulfilling.” He shot you a glance. “I guess it’s something I enjoy so much that most days it doesn’t even feel like work. All of the logistic, ‘real world,’ adult stuff is kind of a headache, but…” Even though his sentence trailed off, you could still follow.
You plopped the sack of seed down on the ground beneath the next bird feeder. “I know that it’s hard to think about what-ifs, and I’m kind of a hypocrite about it, too—but I think—” you scooped up a handful of bird seed and poured it into the opening. This house had a little sunshine painted on the roof. “—Kevin, I think you made the right choice. Obviously, it shouldn’t matter what I think; that’s just what I’ve observed so far.”
“It matters what you think,” he replied quietly. “To me, at least.”
The two of you shared a smile as you dusted your hands off again. The chase is hard, but the reward is sweet—those had been his words to you the other day.
“Do you want me to carry that for you?” He mused, in view of your struggle to pick the damn thing off the ground.
You suddenly gained a spurt of strength and energy. “I’m—great.”
His low chuckle followed you as you went. You could hear his shutter go off again.
“Thank you for assuring me that I took the right risk.” Kevin fell into step beside you once more with his camera cradled in his hands. There was a softness to his eyes again, a kind of tenderness you recognized only when it was just the two of you.
You went for a smile. “I feel you, you know? Maybe not on the same level, but you’re not in crisis alone, okay?”
His shoulder bumped against yours. “Get on my level,” he jested.
Your smile haplessly curled up further. “Yeah, yeah, you five year old.” You leaned over his arm to peer at his camera screen. Your heart hammered, blood spiking, when you saw what the subject of all his shots had been thus far. “Oh my god, have you been taking pictures of me?”
He giggled at your reaction. "What? What else am I supposed to be taking pictures of?"
"Uhm?" You gestured with your arm in a wide arc. "There is literally a whole world around us. Nature is much more photogenic than I am." A nervous laugh bubbled out of your chest as you adjusted a lock of hair that had gotten in your face.
"You are totally photogenic," he scoffed. "Literally look."
The two of you stopped in the middle of the path so he could show you the pictures he had taken thus far. Like most people when they saw a picture of themselves, you wanted to grimace, but you tried to search for what Kevin was seeing.
They were all incredible candid shots. The color was so vivid and bright, the edges crisp and focused. He had captured you at the moment when you were smiling, peeking into the bird feeder. It was that split second before the smile bloomed into something bigger when it only teased at the corner of your mouth.
You leaned back and coughed. "I only look good because you made me look good."
"Now that's bullshit."
You both resumed your walk to the next bird feeder. He said to you, "You can't possibly appreciate nature's beauty without appreciating your own, Yn."
You tilted your head and sent him a sidelong glance. "Why did that sound actually profound?"
"What do you mean actually profound?" His face arranged into an expression of offense. "Am I not regularly profound?"
You smiled to yourself. "I mean… if you had to ask—" Click! "Hey, now wait a minute!"
He beamed something boyish at you from over his camera lens. "Whoops?"
The bird seed bag thumped onto the forest floor again and you moved to check the inside of the next bird feeder. To your utter delight, you were greeted by the sight of sticks and mud and leaves slotted together in a messy riffraff, otherwise known as a bird's nest. You could hear the bright chirping coming out from the feeder's hole, and dark gray feathers poked out.
"We won't disturb these ones," you whispered, backing away to collect your bird seed. But before you left, you took a little of the grain to sprinkle on the outer landing ledge.
You didn't even realize you had been smiling out of pure giddiness until you reached the next feeder on the path. You had always secretly hoped that a bird would take over one of the houses as their own. Lo and behold, that hope manifested into reality.
Kevin helped you out with the next one since this tree was hung with a duplex. It was similar to a human duplex; the house was split down the middle to hold double the feed. The two of you carefully transferred seed and grain into its proper place.
"If you really are uncomfortable with me taking pictures of you," he said as the two of you picked up where you left off, "then I can totally delete them." He made a gesture with his hand. "No harm, no foul."
Heat rose to your cheeks. "It doesn't bother me that much," you admitted sheepishly. "They were good pictures."
"See!" Elated, he slung an arm around your shoulders and tugged you against his side with an affectionate shake. "You see the vision? Do you see it now?"
You couldn't possibly say no to him when his expression was brighter than the sun at high noon. At this moment—this perfect moment—when the sunlight streaming through the trees painted his face in a filter of buttery gold… you could definitely see the vision, but perhaps not the exact one he saw.
EPISODE TEN: YOU WOULD NOT BELIEVE YOUR EYES…
"OH, thank god, you guys went and got firewood!" Jin pressed his hands together in prayer as he jogged over to you and helped transfer the lumber in your arms over to his. On your way back from replenishing the bird feed, you let Kevin hold the remainder of what was left in the bag while you picked up any spare tinder for the fire. There were quite a few loose sticks around that would work nicely for the campfire tonight.
He walked off with your gatherings from the trip, and you and Kevin continued up to your lake house to drop off the bag of bird seed.
"So you were saying about the animal representation thing?" You piped up, recalling where the two of you last ended before your return to home base.
"Oh!" Kevin grinned. "It's so funny because some of my friends—you can totally see the resemblance of an animal, right? But then others don't really get an animal. Like Younghoon: he's just kind of bread."
You nearly tripped over a patch of dirt. "Bread?" You stammered incredulously. "Come again?"
"Bread," he nodded. He murmured in thanks to you when you slid open the screen door for him so he could shuck off his shoes and step inside the house. "But Changmin's a squirrel. Or a giraffe. That's what JC!Yn calls him, anyway; it's because of his long neck."
"Huh," you pondered. Interesting friend group they had going on there. You wondered what you would be…
As you passed by your bedroom on the first floor, you could hear your phone sounding off in aggressive vibrations even through the wooden walls and the closed door. You swore under your breath and pushed into your room to turn it off, then paused when you realized why it had gone off in the first place.
Fireflies.
"Everything okay?" Kevin's voice came back around the bend, his head poking into the space and the bird seed bag nowhere to be seen. He must have put it away just now.
You glanced up at him as you silenced the alarm and tucked your phone into your pocket. You hadn't needed it all that much this entire trip, but you would definitely hold onto it tight tonight. "Huh? Oh, yeah. Ready to head out?"
He didn't question your behavior and nodded. "Ready when you are."
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Sometimes campfire smoke burned Kevin's eyes, but that was mostly when he was younger and didn't know any better. The embers of the fire were always so warm and inviting, always luring him toward it and inviting him to stare into its core. He could still feel the sting of the ash in his pupils as he looked at it from afar now.
The summer sun had sunken down into the horizon and gave way to a comfortable nightfall. Above your heads hung curtains of leaves from oaks, and above them was the blanket of night sky bedazzled in stars. Nature, as you had said earlier today, was quite photogenic.
He sat perched slightly away from everyone in the group, settling at the picnic table with his back to the table surface so he could still face into the fire. When everyone regrouped, Joshua had brought along an acoustic guitar and played it for everyone now.
"Sunday morning, rain is falling."
Someone lit up in a small hoot of approval. Kevin observed the group before him, the several families that had come together. He was especially pleased that the Hongs and the Xus were still hanging out with the lot of them, the latter being around a little less, but still coming out to join the fun, nonetheless.
He hadn't even realized when the last time his mom tried blatantly pushing him towards Serena. At some point, she stopped and it slipped his mind.
"Clouds are shrouding us in moments, unforgettable. You twist to fit the mold that I am in."
Kevin scratched his jaw as he turned his eyes down to the iPad settled in his lap. After he had finished up dinner, he ran inside to swap out his camera for his device to get some sketching done. There wasn't a particular project he was working on; he just wanted to practice a little.
When he lifted his gaze back up to pick a subject, he found himself looking in your direction. Your dad and Connor brought out the goodies to make s'mores. Long, slim skewers were passed around the circle, and the kids were the first to receive marshmallows to spear.
You and your sister sat beside one another and you helped her grab two of the mallows to impale. The light from the fire flickered across your face in differing levels of shadow, a play on contrast. Your expression seemed softer here—he wasn't really sure what it was. Maybe it was the tenderness at the corner of your eyes as you laughed at Connor's marshmallow falling burnt into the pit; maybe it was the triumph you shared with Alice when you helped her sandwich her marshmallows between a slab of chocolate and twin graham crackers.
He liked to believe his hand started before he consciously knew what he was doing.
"That may be all I need… In darkness, she is all I see."
"Are you sure you don't want me to make you one?" You asked your brother as he grabbed his redemption marshmallow from the bag.
Connor huffed, puffing out his chest. "I got this."
Your eyebrows flew upward. "Okay, big guy. Have at it." You chuckled and grabbed a marshmallow for yourself, sticking it onto your skewer to let it broil over the heat.
Kevin traced the lines of your face with his eyes, his hand transferring that memorization onto his screen. Sometimes human expressions were a little difficult to portray accurately, and there was a thorn pricking the back of his mind, urging him to do you justice. He didn't know if he could.
Your head slowly swayed to the sound of Joshua's pretty melody, the corners of your mouth tilting upward. Kevin shifted his position on the bench and drew the little tick mark at the edge of your mouth for that slight smile.
He always knew you were beautiful—for fuck's sake, he'd practically said it today in the forest. It had been among the crush of other important conversations, but he meant it. He still had the image of you engraved in his brain, the moment when you discovered the family of birds in the feeder house. You'd lit up like a goddamn star.
You stood up from your spot once your marshmallow became the perfect golden tone over the edges. You stepped over to the chair that held all the ingredients and smooshed the marshmallow between chocolate and cracker. Then, you turned and marched over to him.
Surprise alerted in his features, and he subtly tilted the screen of his iPad up against his chest. "Hey," he greeted softly while you approached.
You returned the expression and held out the s'more to him. "Here. It's for you."
The organ in his chest did a somersault. "What?" He laughed, "For me?"
"Yeah, silly. I don't know why you're so far away, but I know you like 'em." You settled on the bench next to him with one arm braced behind you on the table and your legs crossed, one over the other.
"Thank you," he said, using one of his hands to bite into it with childlike giddiness. The mixture of flavors exploded in his mouth—the crunch of the graham cracker, the soft, gooeyness of the chocolate and marshmallow. A perfect, sweet treat, and done exactly right. "Mmmh, this is so good," he mumbled behind his hand to catch any crumbs on his lips.
You chuckled. "Nice, glad it has your stamp of approval." Your eyes wandered down to his iPad, and you could see the white screen lit up against his shirt. "What have you been up to?"
His eyes widened a smidge, and there came a bashfulness to his face. (Cute.) "Oh, uhm," he swallowed down the remainder of the s'more and tilted the screen away from you. Huh, strange. "It's nothing really. Just sketching."
You hummed in understanding, though it was a little out of character for him to hide it from you. "Ah, I see."
The two of you descended into silence, and you leaned your back against the table to get comfortable. Kevin passed you sidelong glances from the corner of his eye, unsure of how you knew he wanted you to stay. (Because he definitely did want you to stay.)
Perhaps this was a sign. Thoughts had been brewing in his head as of late, and he wasn't quite sure what to do with them. They all just… sort of piled up in his hands and he didn't know how to free them up to reach out to you.
He opened his mouth to say something—anything—maybe even about the pact—to retract the pact?—it didn't matter.
But when he turned to look at you this time, your gaze was elsewhere. That soft, tenderness remained, but you had turned your attention to Joshua.
Ah. He shouldn't have jumped so soon. A hopeless kind of ache twisted in his stomach that made him uncomfortable. He briefly glanced down at his screen of what he'd sketched of you so far and decided it might be better to finish it later.
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Fireflies. You nearly forgot that you planned to sneak out and see fireflies tonight.
By the time the campfire was cleaned up and everyone was tucked away into their beds, it was probably nearing midnight. You quietly rustled around your room in the dark and used only your phone's flashlight to gather things into a little knapsack—just the essentials, of course. There was no need to get fancy with it.
You wished you had signal so you could text Kevin and warn him ahead of time that you were about to go appear at his window, but you figured it would be fine anyhow. Even if he wasn't awake, the excitement buzzing inside of you could hardly wait.
Shouldering your bag, you headed out the door and crossed the divide between your house and the Moons'.
You located Kevin's window on the second floor, quietly rejoining when you realized it was cracked open. This had to be fate; what other reason would his window be open? (Clearly not for the cool, evening breeze or anything…)
You cupped your hands around your mouth. "Kevin!" You stage-whispered. "Kevin!"
A moment later, a head popped out the open frame. His hair stuck up a little bit and his eyes squinted down into the darkness at you. "Yn?"
"Yes," you said with a grin that he probably thought was idiotically too large. You waved him down. "I'm gonna go see fireflies!"
It took him a second to compute. "What time is it?"
"Like, midnight."
"Okay."
Seven minutes later, Kevin emerged from the back door with a T-shirt and sweatpants on, a yawn splitting his face. He shook his head out as if he was shaking out the remaining remnants of sleep from his system. You met him on the back stairs.
"So what's this about fireflies?" He asked you as the two of you ventured off into the wilderness.
Last year when you were up here at the lake, there was one night when sleep refused to take you. Your solution had been to go on a walk, and as completely dangerous as that sounded (because it was), you'd stumbled upon the meadow you now took Kevin toward. You hadn't the faintest why you never knew about this place after years of coming up to the lake town, but it was where the fireflies took flight.
The meadow was not too long a walk from where you both lived, and by the time you arrived, Kevin was wide awake.
"It's just over this crest," you told him, the jubilation in your voice nearly spilling over.
Kevin smiled at the sound of your excitement and eagerly followed you up the hill.
As soon as you made it over, you lost all your breath in awe. The meadow sprawled at your feet for miles was completely a-glow. Little beads of yellow-green light dotted the field in every corner like light bulbs strung together by invisible string. You had only ever seen this once in person, the rest via the internet and popular culture (movies, TV shows, and the like), and yet, it never compared to the real life experience.
You and Kevin stood there for a moment to soak in the sight. What a wonder of nature this was.
When you finally gained the sense to, you dug around in your bag for wherever you'd stashed your phone. Your tongue stuck out of the corner of your mouth as you fidgeted with the settings on your phone camera. You just wanted one little picture to show one of your professors at school, but it seemed your camera-working skills left much to be desired.
"Here, let me," Kevin murmured and gently took the phone from you. He showed you the screen as he fixed the settings—et voilà! Like magic, the field before you became visible on your camera screen in the crispiest, sexiest quality you had ever seen. "And… there you go."
He clicked the photo for you and handed you back your phone.
Mouth agape, you zoomed in on your completed photo. "Thanks, Kevin!" You gushed as you admired his handiwork.
He clasped a hand against the back of his neck. "No worries. Just a few tricks I learned."
You still warmed at the gesture. With your phone now tucked away, the two of you could sink back into the glory of the field of fireflies.
You heard Kevin's voice, soft, "How do they light up like that?"
"Bioluminescence," you replied in a whisper back. "It's a biochemical reaction that basically lets them convert energy into that light you see." There were plenty of other examples of bioluminescence in nature, as well. One particular instance you'd read about once, was a wave of bioluminescent algae appearing on the shores of a Southern Californian beach during the summer. It was neat stuff.
"Wild," he marveled.
A wave of calm fell over your form. You'd never felt so at peace in your life—just you, the outdoors, and one of the few people who made you actually feel this comfortable. You swallowed at the thought.
You were suddenly hyperaware of how close you were standing to him, the backs of your hands grazing against each other. You could feel his skin, his knuckles against yours—and maybe your brain was making it up, but the touch felt intentional.
For a second, you indulged yourself in what it might be like to close the distance and take his hand into yours. Of course, it wouldn't have to be in the romantic way; friends could hold hands… right? They could hold hands and your heart could skip several beats and he could look at your lips, and you would still be friends. Right?
You cleared your throat, and the sound seemed to thunder in the silence. "We should—we should probably head back," you said, sparing a glance at him.
He caught your eyes and held them. His lips turned upward, and the shine in his eyes was fond. "Okay."
With renewed energy, you made the trek back into the neighborhood. Your bucket list items for the summer had nearly all been checked off—not like you had a physical list written out. These were simply traditions you hoped to fulfill every summer while you were here in your happy place.
The crickets chirped a lovely serenade as you and Kevin strolled back onto the street where your houses stood. At the point where you both needed to split off, you nudged him with your elbow. "Thanks for coming out with me tonight."
"Thank you for inviting me," he countered with an amused hum.
"Good night, Kev."
You both lingered for a second. "Good night, Yn," he said back, pausing for a moment. Then he leaned over toward you and pressed his lips to the crown of your head. Your eyes fluttered shut. "Hope the lovebugs bite."
EPISODE ELEVEN: ROCKING THE BOAT
IF there was one thing that Kevin Moon was good at (besides the myriad of things he was actually good at), it was waking up his cousin to exercise with him in the morning.
"I think I deserve a nice, fat stack of pancakes after this," Yuna grumbled after nearly tripping over a raised tree root and kissing the forest floor. She grappled onto her cousin's shoulder to steady herself, the cousin in question giving a light chuckle at her antics. "When your mom said we should exercise together, I thought she meant the next time I was in Vancouver, not right now."
"Well, it's only because Yn's mom planned to go out with my mom this morning," Kevin mused. "Usually I have a designated walking partner."
"Woe is me. Alas, I have become your Plan B," Yuna sighed melodramatically with a hand draped over her forehead.
This morning, at a lovely 9:46am, the lake and its surrounding forest was just as alive and awake as Kevin was. The sun had taken up its perch in the clear, blue sky and the birds had long since begun their morning songs. They were awfully loud at this part of the lake, the exact three-quarter mark around the perimeter. Kevin thanked his parents for choosing houses away from this area—he would have never slept ever if they bunkered up here. (Not that he slept anyway, but that was beside the point.)
The walk began a little later than he usually did with your mom, but he granted Yuna a bit of leeway since she hadn't exactly been given a head's up. (He argued the opposite, but he let this once slide.)
"You're so dramatic," he chided playfully. "Watch out for that rock."
Yuna's mouth morphed into a deep frown, eyes wide open, as she narrowly missed being nature's fool another time. "Oh, speaking of Yn… Yn's mom? Whatever, I just mean Yn."
Kevin perked up at the topic change. His brain was fresh from last night's midnight endeavor with you and the fireflies. His lips still tingled from when he ventured to kiss you on the head… he wasn't sure where that courage had come from, but the memory of it kick-started his heart into a gallop. "What about Yn?"
She shrugged. "I dunno. You tell me." A smile crawled onto her face, and Kevin could smell her slyness a mile away. "The two of you have been hanging out a ton recently."
"We usually stick together," he sniffed, fidgeting absentmindedly with the beads on the bracelet you'd made him.
"Aish," she pressed her features into an unimpressed look that reminded Kevin of a typical Chanhee deadpan. "You're so unhelpful. You know what I'm talking about!" She smacked the side of his arm, and Kevin erupted into a fit of laughter.
His smile grew shy. "I don't really know what to say! I'm sorry—that's the truth." Because how could he even begin when it came to you? Where did it end, where did it begin?
"I see the way you look at her, Kev."
Kevin shoved his hands into his shorts. Suddenly the bird nest he spotted in a nearby tree became all too interesting. The bird nest reminded him of the birds who had made a home out of one of your feeders, and that reminded him of the adorable elation on your face when you discovered it and that reminded him of—he came to a stop. Oh, god, he was so far gone. "How do I look at her?"
Yuna peered at him curiously, then stopped to face him. "You look at her like I look at Jin. At least, that's how I think I look at him." She offered him a supportive smile. "But right now, you look like you're going through your midlife crisis."
"I might as well be."
She barked out a laugh. "Save that for when you buy a house, my friend."
He rubbed his temples with a wince. "Houses, domesticity, money, partners. Why is adulting so hard?"
"Hey, you'll get through it," she told him and nudged his shoulder. "What's going on, dude? What's on your mind?"
Kevin swallowed. He still hadn't the faintest idea where to begin, but everything had to start somewhere. Yuna had always been kind to him (a menace at times, but that feeling was mutual), and he trusted her with his vulnerabilities. He toed the ground. "Okay, last night, I kissed her—"
"YOU WHAT?"
He sputtered, red rushing to his face, as he grabbed her shoulders. Her eyes were practically falling out of her head. "Nonononono! Let me finish, you—I kissed her on the forehead, okay?"
Her gaping mouth closed only slightly. "Oh…" She thought about it some more. "Oh."
Kevin nodded gravely. "Yup."
Yuna straightened with a furrowed brow. "Well, that's not that big of a deal, is it?"
"What do you mean that's not a big deal?" His hands shot to the top of his baseball cap. "How is that not a big deal!"
"That's because the two of you refuse to acknowledge or entertain the obvious!"
Kevin hissed when she reached over to give his forehead a very hard flick. He rubbed the spot that began to smart; getting flicked in the forehead twice in one lake trip was twice too many. "The obvious?"
"That you guys can have the mushy gushy feelies without it being a product of the placebo effect from your moms' collective matchmaking efforts."
He made a face. "That was a lot of words…"
She deadpanned. "Kevin, listen to me: just because the two of you made a stupid pact when you were ten—"
"Eleven."
"Whatever. Eleven—doesn't mean that you can't leave room to, you know, amend that. You have to give yourself the opportunity to explore it, especially when I can clearly see that your feelings are changing about this girl." Yuna grasped her cousin by his shoulders this time in an attempt to telepathically insert these words into his brain. Or at least, just make him listen.
The words seeped into his head. The two of you had already made amendments earlier this trip, but you had never commented on the "only friends part." He even entertained the idea of bringing it up to you last night at the bonfire.
He didn't realize Yuna already began tugging him along the path to circle around the remainder of the lake to get back to the house. Everything was so muddled… but a part of him recognized that Yuna was right. He just wished he could get an idea of where your thoughts laid.
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There were moments when you thought life could be like a movie, but then why was doing this pedal boat thing so much less glamorous than it seemed? Then again, maybe you shouldn't have thought doing this at high noon was the greatest idea.
You should have been like your Uncle Seokjin, who sat to your left, swallowed up in a blue lifejacket, a pair of big sunglasses, and a crocheted bonnet with a duck face to keep his face out of the sun. Yeah, maybe glasses would have been a good idea.
Sweat dribbled down the side of your face and down the slope of your nose, and you wiped it off with the back of your hand. "It's so hot, Uncle. We couldn't have waited until later today when it cooled down?"
He leaned back, his cheeks and skin reddened and damp from the heat and the fire in his calves from pedaling. "Okay, okay. Let's stop here."
"Right in the middle of the lake?" You asked incredulously, but immediately brought your feet off the pedals to give your legs a deserved break.
"What better place to do so?"
The two of you lounged in your seat beneath the molten afternoon sun, limbs screaming, water draining from your bodies through your pores. This would have been nice if you brought a sun umbrella… or maybe some water… man, did you make so many poor choices today.
"So what's going on with you and Kevin?"
The question snapped you out of your heat-fazed daze. You nearly thought you hallucinated him saying that. You stammered, "What about me and Kevin?"
You could see his overexaggerated facial expression even from behind his sunglasses. "Yah, don't give me that. You know what I'm talking about—I saw you two last night."
You lurched out of your seat and caused the violent rocking of the boat. You and your copilot let out twin swears as the boat evened out on the waves, and luckily, did not capsize. "Sorry—the fuck? You did?"
"Actually, I didn't," he snickered. "But now I know something did happen. So what's the tea, girl? Hit me with it. It's hot outside but I always take my beverages scorching." He shifted in his seat, carefully, in order to give you his full attention.
You couldn't believe he dragged you out to the middle of the lake just for this conversation. Total Uncle Seokjin move. You walked (or pedaled) right into his checkmate.
Moments of last night flooded into your brain—the campfire, the fireflies, the kiss, the… the him. Kevin. You gulped. Where did you even think to begin? "I took him to see fireflies last night."
Jin scrunched his eyebrows together. "Fireflies? Since when did we have fireflies? You didn't take me to see the fir—oh, you know, what? It was your little romantic moment; I got it."
"It wasn't a romantic moment!" You sputtered helplessly, uselessly. "It was—it was a moment of serenity and scientific marvel."
"You are such a nerd. What did he do, huh? Did you guys hold hands or something?"
Almost. "No," you said. "He… he did kiss my forehead once we got back though."
"Aha!" You both careened as the boat trembled violently from Seokjin's sudden Einstein epiphany. "I knew that something happened," he said once the boat slowed to a stop again. "I just had a feeling in my gut."
"Are you sure it wasn't the yogurt you had this morning?"
"How dare you," he huffed. "I brought my lactose pills. And hey! Stop changing the subject."
You laughed aloud, but inwardly, your gut was churning. Maybe you could blame the heat, but you knew the real reason why you were suddenly feeling as unstable as the pedal boat you sat upon. The idea that the entirety of your friendship could be so easily uprooted… well, perhaps not easily. Picking apart your friendship would be like flushing weeds out of a garden—you would have to get at the roots, and right now, the roots were so deep that you would fall into the ground before finding the bottom.
Not that you wanted to uproot your friendship, or relationship, with Kevin. Of course not.
What did that forehead kiss even mean? What did all of the moments you shared between him this summer, as a whole, even mean? Why, all of a sudden, did you want the way he looked at you to mean something different besides platonic affection? Why did you want more when you had never really thought about more before?
You voiced all of this aloud to your uncle, who sat staring out onto the calm surface of the lake. When you were finished with your ramble, he said, "You need to get your shit together, girl."
You coughed. "Thanks, that was so helpful."
"I'm told that a lot," he beamed. "But really, those are all very good questions, Yn. And they're super important, too."
You frowned, lifting the rim of your baseball cap to wipe away the perspiration collecting at your hairline like a cult. "Do you think that these mixed feelings are a result of all the matchmaking going on? Like, somehow, we've let it affect how we view each other?"
"Honestly?" He sighed, his shoulders lifting and dropping in a half-hearted shrug. "Could be. But, Yn honey, is it really such a bad thing? And let's think about it this way—how do you feel about Joshua?"
You didn't need to think too hard about it. "He's a catch, but not my type of butterfly."
"Exactly, and oh my go—"
"Don't," you chuckled menacingly, "call me a nerd."
He gestured vaguely with his hand. "I wasn't; I was gonna call you a dork."
You snorted. With another swipe at your dripping neck, you said, "But Kevin and Serena—"
"'Kevin and Serena' don't exist," he told you with a smack of his lips. Jin peered at you from over the rim of his glasses, which in kind, made the duck's beady eyes stare straight into your soul, too. "That girl bats for the other team, and Kevin has shown zero interest in her other than helping her not fall off a jet ski."
Huh. You leaned your elbow onto the knee of one leg, propped up to your chest. "Well when you put it that way…"
"When I put it that way," he finished for you, "it makes it a little clearer, hm?" You were quiet for a moment, and Jin gave your shoulder a pat. "Some things are just meant to be."
The words, so familiar to you, rang true as a bell. Some things are just meant to be. You couldn't help the smile that started to work its way onto your face, and it was all thanks to Seokjin helping you sweep away some of the webs confusing your brain. You weren't completely confident, but you could feel yourself being nudged in a certain direction, and this time, you weren't pushing back.
The tide could take you where it may.
Your uncle by association added quietly, "Haven't you thought just once that, after all this sneaking around, there's been another reason for it other than a pact?"
EPISODE TWELVE: FISH IN THE SEA, ANTS IN THE GROUND
BY the time you and Jin returned to solid ground, you discovered that Kevin was away with his dad helping the Xus pack and clean up. Today they would be departing the small lake town, as they hadn't planned on spending as much time up here as the rest of you did. You and most of the others already said your goodbyes at the campfire, so you had little else to do but twiddle your thumbs until you could confront Kevin with your thoughts.
A shower always produced productive results, especially after melting Wicked Witch of the West style in the middle of the lake.
There was time, you realized, to bring things together. Of course, there was a part of you that shied away from wanting to even address this epiphany. What if bringing this up opened up a whole new can of worms? In other words, what if talking about the elephant in the room only led to regret? You didn't want to lose Kevin, and because your families were always so close, you didn't want to lose this. This connection, this tradition, this place.
Too many memories made their home here at the lake. It was your happy place… his happy place. It was everything.
Everything could change, and wasn't that terrifying? But it could also be great, and who best to share the scariest, greatest moments of life with other than your Kevin Moon?
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As rubber tire wheels ate gravel, Kevin nodded to his dad and set off back across the lawn toward your cabin. The afternoon had him busy with helping the Xus head home, which he didn't mind doing, of course; the lot of them had fun with his party, and his party with the lot of them. He and Serena left on friendly terms, undeterred by his mother's half-hearted attempt to get them sort of talking. Serena said she understood.
Kevin needed to talk to you though. After the morning was spent with Yuna getting him to see the big ass elephant in the room—trunk in his face and trumpet in his ear—there was no other course of action left but to tell you the truth.
The truth. God, the truth. The truth was that he didn't want the old pact in place anymore. That was it, plain and simple. It was crazy to think about how long the two of you had let it restrain your relationship—wait, did you want it to though?
"Hey Kevin!"
Kevin slowed to a stop, attention perking up at his name when he saw Joshua making his way over to him. He worried his bottom lip. You didn't… like Josh, did you? He just had to be sure because, well, that would throw a rock into things. "Oh, hey, man."
Joshua offered him a bright smile. "Hey. Did Serena and her parents just take off?"
Kevin cupped the back of his head. "Uh, yeah! Just now, actually."
"Cool, cool." Joshua nodded his head. "I wanted to talk to you about something."
His heart threw itself over the side of a cliff. Oh no. He let out a laugh, hoping to push the nerves out of his voice, but he was sure it wasn't too convincing anyhow. "Really? What—what about?"
"It's about Yn—" Oh, double no. "—I kind of," he winced, "noticed that her mom was trying to… nudge us together?"
"Oh god, let me be the first to apologize—"
Joshua broke the tension with a chuckle. "Hey, it's no worries! I just didn't know if you were aware or not because you and she kind of seemed like a couple to me, but I didn't know if her mom knew."
Kevin blinked, heart quickening for a different reason. "What?" He stammered. "Sorry, can we rewind?"
"Hm? That you and Yn are a thing? Are—are you not?" He gasped, eyes going wide. "Shit, that was stupid of me to just assume. Sorry if that was totally awkward!"
Oh, but quite the opposite. Kevin could feel the blood rush to his cheeks, clear as day. There was a warm feeling in his chest knowing that more people thought that you and him looked like a couple. It was ridiculous how the thought got him giddy now. Kevin shook his head though. "No, no, you're good, dude. But we aren't a couple." Yet. Hopefully.
Joshua cocked his head to the side curiously. "Oh? I guess… it's still a little strange of me to assume, so I apologize. You're…?"
"Interested?" A nod. "Yeah." (Wow, that was a verbal admittance. One step closer to the real thing.)
Kevin cleared his throat and grabbed his shoulder with his opposite hand. "You're not—you're not interested in her, are you? I mean," he rushed to add, "it's totally fine. I understand—"
Joshua shook his head. "Oh shit, no, I'm not interested. Not that Yn's a bad person or anything, but I'm taken."
Pause.
…that made sense.
Joshua laughed, ducking his head to hide the smile that blossomed on his face. "Yeah, I'm already spoken for. My parents don't really know yet, but… yeah. I didn't wanna get in the way of whatever you and Yn have, and hopefully I'm not saying this too late."
On the contrary, a weight lifted from Kevin's chest and he sucked in a lungful of summer breeze. "Nah, man. Thanks for saying it in the first place; I appreciate it."
"Yeah," Joshua said pleasantly. He nodded at him, lips pursed with one eye squinted. "She digs you, too, you know? I've seen it all throughout this trip."
Hope filled his heart like the air ballooning his lungs. He didn't know what to do with all of these. They just kept coming up onto the stack of things in his hands that he wanted to take into consideration and tell you to your face, once and for all. Your face just kept flickering in his mind's eye, and the nerves were slowly melting into excitement. He wanted to share this with you, as the two of you had done for years.
"I hope so."
Joshua clasped a hand on Kevin's shoulder. "I would say 'go get 'em, tiger,' but I have a friend at school who is scarily obsessed with tigers, so I'll just say—" A squeeze of his shoulder, "you got this."
Kevin didn't know what to do with that extra factoid, but he gave Joshua a grateful grin. "Thanks, man."
The pair split off from there, one heading back toward his own cabin, and the other, marching toward the future. Whatever laid ahead, he could take on.
His step gained a skip, and soon, he was jogging across the green until he appeared at your back porch. He hadn't really prepared anything—no romantic gestures, no flowers or candles, no chocolates. All he had were the words on his tongue and his newly realized love for you. Love, a strange phenomenon. He had his love for you stashed away in his breast pocket and it blossomed every summertime.
He let himself into the house and went poking around for you. "Yn? Yn, you back yet?"
No answer.
He ducked his head into the kitchen, the living room, before he came upon your bedroom door left slightly ajar. Through the sliver, he saw the bottoms of your feet on the bed, and he gently knocked on the door before pushing through.
"Yn…? Ah," His voice quieted to a whisper.
You were curled up over the bedsheets, asleep. Kevin slowly tiptoed his way over to you where your body was angled toward your phone screen, lying discarded on the pillow and actively running an episode of Our Planet.
A smile, fond and tender, pressed itself into his mouth. He reached over to carefully turn the downloaded episode off to descend the room in complete silence.
His head swiveled toward the foot of the bed where your patchwork quilt hung off the railing. He carefully draped it over your sleeping form, then made his exit.
You deserved the rest. And though he couldn't confess to you now, this gave him the time to ensure he got this exactly right.
EPISODE THIRTEEN: THE DAMSELS IN DEVOTION DEAL™
TIME passed by differently here.
One moment, you were biding your time and indulging in an episode of Our Planet; the next, the bedroom was dark and the house was quiet. You roused from sleep confused and delirious. You stretched your limbs up over your head, taking note of the quilt draped over your body.
Huh, you wondered how that got there.
Your eyes fluttered and squinted when you stood up and saw a flicker of amber light from outside your window. The view looked over only part of the backside to the house, so all you could see were the shadows that the campfire created. They danced by way of the breeze, their puppetmaster.
The time on your phone read a (slightly alarming) ten o'clock. You hadn't realized you slept that long. Maybe you were more tired than you originally thought.
Wait, then why was the campfire still blazing?—
"Yn! Psst!"
You pressed your face against the open slit in the window to track the sound of your name. Déjà vu swept over you as you discovered Kevin making his way over toward you from the outside. "Kevin? Is everyone still up?"
He shook his head. "No, no. I've just been waiting," he admitted sheepishly. "Come on out. Have you eaten yet?"
"Oh, no. I just woke up."
"Ah… right." He clasped the back of his neck. "Well, come out anyway. We can sit together."
Together. You liked the sound of that.
Without wasting more time, you promised him two minutes and scurried out of your room to round to the back door. The campfire crackled on your side of the lawn, rather than the middle of the properties this time, and Kevin tended to it on one of the two foldable chairs present.
You took a seat in the open seat. "S'mores?" You chuckled, noting the basket of ingredients at his feet.
He ducked his head. "Yeah," he loosened a laugh, "I thought I'd make you a s'more this time."
It was just a s'more, and yet, here was the organ in your chest palpitating in your chest. You didn't reject the s'more, of course, and watched him skewer a marshmallow and hold it over the blazing embers. As he did so, you caught the way his other hand fidgeted with your bracelet on his wrist, how his tongue darted out to wet his bottom lip. Was he as nervous as you were?
The thing, Yn.
"There's something I—" You both stopped short at your simultaneous words. They were the same, too, and had the pair of you fumbling.
"You first," you said, gesturing to him.
He hummed and tried for a smile. "Do you remember that night in sixth grade when we made the pact?"
You nodded.
"It was kind of like this actually," he mused. The marshmallow had browned into a beautiful gold, and you reached into the basket to help him assemble the chocolate and graham cracker pieces. Your fingers grazed his as he squished the outer crackers together to hand it to you. "A late night, s'mores, the campfire."
You took a chunk out of the s'more and swallowed before adding, "Seems like so long ago."
"Right?" He slipped the metal skewers back into the basket and leaned his arms onto his knees, body angled toward you. "The pact, I…" He considered his words as they melted on his tongue like the chocolate and marshmallow on yours. "I wanted to ask if you would think about another amendment."
You met his eyes now. The burning fire reflected in his dark irises, warm and bright. "An—an amendment," you parroted. Was this what you thought it was? You finished off your s'more, hoping not to choke when he told you whatever he wanted to tell you. You suddenly wondered if the s'more was just to soften the blow.
Kevin nodded. "Yeah, another amendment. We didn't really discuss the biggest part of the original pact when we made the rescue protocol."
"The 'just friends' clause," you finished, breathlessly.
"Yn, I don't wanna be just friends anymore."
It didn't hit you at first. You swore the ash from the fire was making you hear things, but it hit you, milliseconds later. "Oh."
He pursed his lips for a moment. "It's taken me a stupidly long time to come to this conclusion, and I was thinking about what we were talking about the other night—about if we were ready for relationships. And I said that maybe the person I wanted to spend the rest of my life with was someone I already met.
"Yn, I think I'm in love with you," he said. "Not just in a way that friends love each other, but something… something more. And I wanted to let you know because—if I'm being completely honest—I want to share everything with you."
You could feel the way your lips curled upward and your heart soared. "I wanna share everything with you, too. And I don't know how long I've sat on this, but what I do know is that I feel so much for you." Every admittance that was released into the night air like sparks flying was another card laid out between you two, face up. "This place, the lake, has been my place, Kevin. But I want you to be my person."
He smiled at you, sweet and boyish, the type of smile that made you feel on the edge of seventeen. He helped you out of dark places with that smile; he was always showing you the light. "Your person," he murmured, letting that sink into his tongue and be familiarized with it. "I would love to be your person, Yn."
Your hand found his across the gap between your chairs. His thumb caressed over the side of yours, and he tucked his other hand over top until you were enveloped in his clasp—safe and sound.
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When the fire was reduced to nothing more than ash and memory, you and Kevin raced each other down to the water's edge. The lake was stilled beneath the moonlight, a pool of silvery mercury. You reached for his hand again and intertwined your fingers firmly, a comforting weight and hold.
It felt right.
"So since we made an amendment to the protocol again," you started as he swung your laced hands between your bodies, "we need to seal the deal."
A grin bloomed on his face, and he bit his lip. "Hear me out," he drawled. "Maybe we should update the seal, too."
You narrowed your eyes in jest. "You just don't want me to flick your forehead."
"Sue me, you flick hard," he laughed.
"But shoot."
He licked his lips and turned to face you. "Can I show you?"
Your heart gave one big lurch as he leaned over to you. You closed the rest of the distance and sighed something happy at the feel of his lips against yours. It was gentle and brief, his mouth parting from yours to give you enough room to back away.
You could feel your twin smiles. "I kind of like it."
"Yeah?" He hummed. "Well, that can be our practice round."
You shook your head and threw your arms around his neck to pull him back over to you. His arms curled around your middle, hands pressed to your sides and holding you close.
When you broke apart this time, his warm chuckle ran a delicious bolt of electricity down your spine. "I know things are gonna be different now… But we got this."
It was the way he looked at you—the one that assured you he was the same Kevin he was three years ago and beyond; the kid who broke the swing set when you challenged him to a bet; the kid who sketched butterflies in meadows, and now sketched you in the firelight; the kid who would never judge you or ridicule you for your feelings, but validate them, always. You didn't know how you were so blind to it before.
It wasn't so scary anymore, not when you knew he would be there with you.
"Yeah," you said softly, running your thumb down the back of his neck, "I'm not really worried."
He let out a breathy laugh, and it coaxed one out of you, too. Kevin pressed his forehead to yours, pressed a kiss to the tip of your nose, pressed his heart to yours.
Some things really were just meant to be.
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a/n: now the question is how are they gonna tell their moms... 🤡 if you enjoyed, pls remember to reblog, or comment, or send in an ask!! thanks for reading :] see you in at your convenience!
permanent taglist: @flwoie @vatterie @seomisaho @hqrana @ja4hyvn @tinkerbell460 @kaaimins @hyunjaespresent-deobi @otterly-fey @zzoguri @floatingpluto @winterchimez @ethereal-engene @gyulfriend @polarisjisung @jaehunnyy @shakalakaboomboo @loveliestfelix @bless-311 @zhaixiaowen @leaz-kpop-life @amourdsr @pxppxrminty @kqyutie @sseastar-main @kxthleen14 @fluorescentloves @mosviqu @justalildumpling @jaerisdiction @super-btstrash-posts @jundundun @http-gyu @mvvnsseul @outrologist @vernonburger @maessseongs @ericlvr @kflixnet
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littleroaes · 6 months
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( 🌷 ) ❀˖° — ‘ ACQUAINTANCES ‘ — a list of my MOOTS ( writers and non ) who I have interacted with and fic RECS.
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( 🌷 ) ❀˖° — AUTHORS NOTE : a list of my acquaintances here on tumblr! as I’m very timid, I don’t have too many interactions with some users. but the net of people here is very sweet and sincere. please please give them love!
I will update it as I get to know new people, read past works/ new works!
• LAST UPDATE : oh my god! it’s done! I think I have gathered all? don’t feel afraid to comment or something else if I missed you! It’s pretty rushed at parts, but I’ll improve on it, for the time being, I’m released it’s finally up!
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➵ @blue-rainydays 💙
➵ @cloverdaisies m.list personal rec ➤ HEY CHAT! ∩^ω^∩ ↳ no one loves this fic like I love this fic! reread it a lot because it genuinely makes me so happy! i wrote it in my reblog but im so sad this yn and hj arent together lol. i would be the biggest minecraft fan if they were real →
➵ @cupidjyu m.list personal rec ➤ he’s hopeless! ↳ the fluffiest fluff that has ever fluffed! kicked my feet all the way through! juyeon's character is so entertaning to read! → other: detention for romance
➵ @everynewiee m.list ( @adorablehyunjae ) personal rec ➤ Honey - Dew Cat Cafe ↳ so cute! juyeon wears an apron and owns a cat(do I need to say more?) their pet bring them together!au !!! →
@floatingpluto
➵ @from-izzy m.list personal rec ➤ this summer… ↳ hyunjae is so patient! real love im telling you! that giddy feeling of when you feel special! It's what it gives! I wish to have someone like this hyunjae →
➵ @haet-sal m.list personal rec ➤ Cinderella Boy ↳ really creative fic! i loved the concept, had me in my seat the entire time! youre gonna feel so bad for juyeon though →
➵ @heemingyu m.list personal rec ➤ Serenade ↳ so feel good! I absolutely adore eric's and sunwoo's dynamic in this one! eric is down so bad, and i love it! → other: Rainy Days
➵ @hyungseos-cafe m.list personal rec ➤ the thought of you ↳ love this series! very easy to read since all of them are pretty short, but each one is so distinct and cute! I especially like changmins and erics! →
➵ @juyeonszn m.list (@fawnieszn/ @jungwonszn @yeonjunszn @eunseokszn )
personal rec ➤ BLAH BLAH ↳ I feel like there’s a lot of coincidences between me and this fic lol. but I do truly love it. jacob is 🫠🫠, basically all fawns fics make me feel 🫠🫠 lol →
➵ @kimsohn m.list personal rec ➤ polaroid & hearts on your sleeve ↳ polaroid is such a cute one! makes me want a jacob for myself even more! hearts on your sleeve is heart-aching, but I find it so creative! →
➵ @kpop17
➵ @leaz-kpop-life
➵ @onceuponabloom tag system! personal rec ➤ taste your lipgloss ↳ I’m so bad at describing things! but kicking my legs! very typical flirty, oops, heart fluttering vibe but I love it! →
➵ @o-onikix m.list personal rec ➤ Enchanted ↳ was some time since I read it, but I remember enjoying it! First time I wish to end a relationship with hyunjae →
@seolboba m.list personal rec ➤ 8:36 AM ↳ not tbz, but very cute! I really like rin (oc)! though I’m a kevrin stan, I really like Felix and her in this one. chans immediate leadership/ family ship is amazing! →
➵ @sungbeam m.list personal rec ➤ ain’t no romeo ↳ listend to it in speechify! a fic with so much to explore! there's so many good dynamics between characters and different elements! from humor, cutesy, fluttering and mysterious! →
➵ @winterchimez m.list ( @midnightfantasiez ) personal rec ➤ Make or Brake ↳ love changmin childhood friends to lovers! he fits it so well for some reason. really feel good fic! → other: criminal,
➵ @zzoguri m.list personal rec ➤ of linked arms and bruised hearts (you are the reason i keep on going) ↳ a long one, but the ending is so satisfying. every moment feels well-earned! again, changmin fits f2l so bad! I love their friend group, and jacob lowkey broke me lol →
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theharrowing · 2 years
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Collateral
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Your ex-boyfriend gets in over his head working for the local mafia, and Boss Min has come to collect his payment: You.
But was it simply a matter of being in the wrong place at the wrong time? Or has he always had his sights on you?
🗡️ Yoongi x Female Reader x Namjoon, Taehyung x Jungkook, Seokjin x Hoseok, Jungkook x Reader, Jimin x Seokjin x Hoseok, Members x Non-BTS Members - italics refer to relationships/situationships in member pov chapters 🗡️ word count: work in progress (currently 317k!!! wowie!!!) 🗡️ warnings: mafia au, strangers to lovers, complicated relationships graphic violence, minor character death, major character injury, poly, smut, angst, fluff, nsfw, explicit 21+ | panic attacks and ptsd, abuse (of power, drugs, people, etc.), treating humans as objects, use of “whore” & “slut”, brothel & strip club environment, gambling & casino environment, past abuse alluded to (physical and sexual), past drug use, use of drugs (weed, cocaine, heroin, ecstasy, pills), mutual pining, explicit & intense sexual content (all main characters including reader mc can be assumed to be bi/pan; everyone switches but typically mc bottoms/subs; masturbation; oral, vaginal & anal sex; multiple orgasms & overstimulation; threesomes; voyeurism & exhibitionism; squirting; daddy kink; noona kink; light sub/dom; restraints; begging & teasing; praising; light slapping & spanking; breath play; dubcon in member pov - not with mc), murder, use of weapons (switchblades, kunai knives, guns, poison, molotov cocktail); graphic depictions of torture (breaking bones, removing fingers, threatening at gunpoint); blood tending to wounds; car chase & collision; more warnings to be added!
🗡️ co-starring: members of stray kids, members of monsta x, members of big bang, shin ryujin of itzy, members of balming tiger, ahn hyejin (hwasa) of mamamoo, kim hyungseo (bibi), Christian Yu (drp ian) 🗡️ notes: welcome to my mafic fic! this story starts out kinda cheeky and lighthearted, but it gets very dark. do not take the warnings lightly! also, although i am using real city names (Seoul, Busan, etc.) i am only doing this to paint a geographical picture. none of these depictions are true to any real city and no research on them is being done. i do not want any negative descriptions of neighborhoods to be of real places because i have never been to Seoul or Busan (or any city listed), nor do i have a connection to these places, and that is not a fair thing for me to do. every place i describe is completely made up and if it resembles a real place, that is coincidence. assume all characters are in their mid-late 20s regardless of their real world ages.
🗡️ also note: although i try to keep out as much physical description as i can for the main character, i am a short and curvy person, and a lot of this is short and curvy person coded because that is an experience i enjoy writing for. if you are tall or thin and this bothers you, sorry lol. ♡ mc's hair length, color, and texture are not described outside of being sometimes pinned or braided away from the face. 🗡️ beta read by @neoneunnajimin 🗡️ posted may 2022 to present | read on ao3​ 🗡️ check out the playlist!
🗡️ character asks - always open! contain spoilers!
🗡️ take the uquiz: which collateral character are you?
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INDEX
1: I know exactly who you are | 5.4k words
2: Be a good little wolf | 7.4k words
3: I plan to make you mine if you will let me | 7.8k words
4: You will learn | 9.2 words
5: What are you afraid of? | 10.6 words
6: Beg for me | 9.3k words
7: I have questions | 8.8k words
8: Punishments that come to those who betray us | 9k words
9: Museum, ice cream, narcotics shakedown date | 11.5k words
10: We know everything, dove | 12k words
POV: Jeongguk | 8.5k words
POV: Jimin | 9.7k words
11: Something you will have in abundance | 13.7k words
12: Loose lips sink ships | 11.6k words
POV: Seokjin | 7.2k
13: Merely offering to share what is mine | 10.9k words
POV: Hoseok | 6.8k
14: Darling, breathe | 17.9k words
POV: Taehyung | 10.9k words
15: The end of an era | 16.4k words
16: Sometimes important decisions — ones that we know we have to make — still hurt like hell | 9.2k words
17: Making someone cry is a side-effect of being in love, I'm afraid | 15.6k words
18: You, me, and our men | 17.1k words
19: The only lifestyle I have ever known | 18.6k words
20: Trapped in Limbo | 22.8k words
POV: Namjoon | 7.3k words
21: It's now or never | 19.4k words
POV: Yoongi (coming soon!)
22: I just need a chance to breathe
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23: I do not want this life of death and destruction
24: Misery in your arms, but misery without you
25: This was not part of the bargain
26: Don't go insane
27: In an instant, the world has stopped spinning
28: When the nightmare ends, what kind of hell awaits us?
29: The only way out of this lifestyle is death
30: Meet me under the aurora borealis
*chapter titles may slightly change as the writing happens.
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Collateral is copyright 2022 - 2024 theharrowing, all rights reserved. no translations or reposts allowed!
tag list info under the cut:
tag list 1: @acquiescence804 @afangirllikeme-blog @alcurls02 @annacroft23114 @angel-121 @artgukk @btsiguess-kpop @bts-ficreviews @codeinebelle @curryshesus @dasexydevitt13 @giriiboyy @fakedanger @fringe-frank @idkjustlovingbts @illnevertrustmyselfagain @jalexad @juju-227592 @justaweird0 @kissme-ornot @kurtsworlds-posts tag list 2: @likeshatteredrainbowglass @massivelyfullenthusiast @m1sss1mp @mayeolorie @mgthecat @moonleeai @mushroom-main @onlyasgoodasitgets @openup-yourmind @pamzn @sleepilysworld @stocking221 @spookyminyunki @tae-v-eat @thelilbutifulthings @unsureofwhathappens @valhallawhispers @xjiminsthighsx @xyahrinx
🗡️ note: by asking to be tagged in this fic, you are agreeing that you are 18 or older and that you are comfortable with reading media that involves violence, drug & alcohol use & other dark, serious themes. if you are not tagged, please check your settings. if you change your url and want to continue to be tagged, it is your responsibility to let me know.
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deobienthusiast · 4 months
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this christmas | jacob bae
• pairing: gender-neutral!reader x christmas shop worker!jacob bae, mentions of reader x kim sunwoo, and small mentions of chanhee
• word count: 6.4k words
• genre: fluff, slight angst
• rating: PG
• warnings: there’s a slight mention of wanting to be dead, hatred of christmas, i made sunwoo an asshole
• notes: my secret santa fic for the lovely @snowflakewhispers! i hope you enjoy it so! i really enjoyed writing this and sunwoo i desperately apologize for portraying you this way🥺
• tagging: @deoboyznet @zzoguri @hyungseos-cafe @userjuyo @hongyangi (if you’d like to be on a tag list, let me know)
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To say Christmas was your least favorite holiday would be an understatement. The kids running around acting like gluttony-craved little animals, families fighting over toys, traveling. The part about Christmas that you hated the worst? Couple activities.
Seeing happy couples frolicking about in the ankle deep snow. Listening to Christmas carolers, looking at Christmas lights, getting each other cute little couple gifts. Absolutely not. You weren’t always this way. You used to love Christmas. In fact, you adored it! It was your favorite holiday. The opportunity to spend time with loved ones, eat delicious food and sweet treats, snow, gifts. Who wouldn’t love Christmas?
The holiday became even more special when you met your ex, Sunwoo. He was a ball of energy. He held this swagger and exuded confidence. Every person who ever came in contact with him would swoon over him. He just had that effect on people, and boy did he know it. Sunwoo would come off as cocky. He constantly expected people to melt to the ground when he was around. When he didn’t get his way, it was an absolute nightmare.
This behavior should’ve been your first red flag, but honestly, you were so enamored by him that you looked right past it. Your friends tried to warn you, but unfortunately they never got through to you. You should’ve listened. You definitely should’ve listened. Maybe then, the last Christmas you were together wouldn’t have hurt so much. Maybe, you could’ve prevented your heart from breaking as deep as it did. With school ending for Christmas break, you were taking it upon yourself to visit your somewhat-loving boyfriend who lived across the city. Trudging through the cold snow, up the steps to his apartment, you felt a warmth fill your heart at the fact that for the first time in a couple weeks you’d be spending your favorite holiday with your favorite person.
His door was cracked open, something you constantly got on him about as he didn’t live in the best neighborhood, so you let yourself in. Immediately, that warmth you felt was gone. Vanished into the cold, winter air like water when it hits high heat. Clothes were thrown all across the small apartment. Some of his, and some of someone else’s. Now, you’re probably thinking…did you confront him? Did you trash the place? Did you break down in front of him and beg for answers? Well the answer to all those questions, no. You did none of those things, rather you left the small little gift you got from his favorite gift shop on his side table in the living room, and left. You hoped that just leaving would make what you found out hurt a little less. That maybe sparing your heart any more pain would help you. It didn’t. Your Christmas break was miserable. Friends leaving messages in attempts to find out what happened with Sunwoo when he showed up to your mutual friend's annual Christmas party with a new girl on his arm. Seeing him post pictures of them going sledding, decorating his little apartment and his Christmas tree that looked very similar to a Charlie Brown Christmas tree made you sick. You vowed to protect yourself and your heart. Writing off Christmas was the best way to do it. You stopped celebrating. You stopped visiting family and friends, and you just stayed on campus to focus on school. You hated Christmas. Until this year.
Determined to bring back your Christmas spirit, your mother forced you to come home for Christmas. She claimed your one bad memory shouldn’t cloud your love for the holiday and wanted you to be home with loved ones to help you get back to that happy place. You did not want to be home, but when your mother makes up her mind on something there is no turning back.
Your old clunker of a car drove soundly on the salted roads. The snow this year had been even worse than previous years, prompting the city to work overtime in clearing roads for the holidays. You never really trusted their work anyway, so you still drove carefully and slowly so as to not die. Apparently the other people on the road behind you didn’t like that. As they passed you, thoughtfully giving you the finger in an obscene gesture of hatred, you fiddled with your radio. You did not want to listen to another Christmas song.
The car ride was almost unbearable. You couldn’t find a single station not playing Christmas music, so you weren’t in the most jolly mood when you arrived at your parents. Waiting outside in what had to have been the most ugly Christmas sweater you had ever seen in your entire life and a plate full of cookies, your mother smiled widely. She was so happy to finally have her only child home for the holidays, even if said child was Ebenezer Scrooge Jr.
“Sweetheart, welcome home!” Your mother exclaimed happily.
Giving her your best smile, you let her pull you into a hug. The bright green tinsel decorating her ugly sweater rustling against you.
“Hi mom.”
She pulled away, shoving the plate of heavily decorated sugar cookies into your hands. “Take those back to your roommate. I know how much Chanhee loves my sugar cookies.”
A genuine smile made its way to your face at the mention of your best friend. The only bright spot in your life. He was your savior after you broke up with Sunwoo, and another person who was convinced that you would find your Christmas spirit again.
“He’ll be over the moon, mom.” You told her as she pulled you into the house.
The heat hit you like a freight train, as both the fireplace and heater were running at full force. You were surprised your mother wasn’t dying of heat exhaustion with the three shaven sheep wool sweater she had on. You set the cookies down on the table, looking at all the Christmas decorations she had taken the time to precisely lay out. The garland adorning the fireplace was set with care, four stockings laid out. The fourth one was for Chanhee as he usually accompanied you when you traveled, but couldn’t this year. The Christmas tree looked like a holiday bomb. Decorated in green, red, and silvers, the tree looked good. You couldn’t deny that. You did notice, however, that the topper was missing.
“Mom,” You trailed off. “Where’s the angel?”
She chuckled. “Your father dropped it when he went to put it on. Her glass snowflake shattered, so we have to go to the little Christmas store downtown.”
You frowned. “Mom, everything is closed because of the weather.”
Shaking her head, she spoke. “This place is open every day no matter the weather when it’s the holidays. The family wants it to always be accessible for people during the holiday season.”
You went to nod as she spoke again. “You’re coming with me.”
Letting out a huff, you headed upstairs to drop off your suitcase. Opening your bedroom door, you shoved your suitcase off to the side. The room looked the same as it did when you graduated. Your mother hadn’t touched a thing. Pictures of you and your friends, family members, Sunwoo.
“Why haven’t I taken those down?” You asked yourself.
Walking over to the board, you stared at the pictures of you and Sunwoo, letting your fingers run across them before tearing them off the board. The sound of ripping paper as the picture was pulled through the tack made you smile only slightly, crumbling the pictures up in your hand to throw them away. You unpacked your suitcase, putting all your clothes in drawers as you thought about how you could get out of going to the Christmas shop downtown. Some of your ideas spanned from faking an illness, to making Chanhee fake an emergency. Each one was worse than the last, and you figured going just to get a tree topper wouldn’t be so bad. Accepting your fate, you sat in your room, scrolling through social media as you inevitably waited to be dragged to hell.
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You were wrong. You were so so wrong. Your mother had you walking around this store for almost two hours, with the basket she had, being turned into a cart to fill with more than just a new Christmas tree topper. You were starting to get annoyed. Your mother had no plans of leaving any time soon, so you ventured off. You rounded a corner you hadn’t been down yet, running your hands over the ornaments that looked like colorful food items.
“I personally like the oversized ice cream cones. They are kind of unrealistic though. Who takes a bite out of their ice cream?” A soft voice said from behind you.
You whipped around, your eyes landing on a guy with quite the facial features. He was handsome, that’s for sure. His almond-shaped eyes bored into yours as he smiled, effectively taking your breath away.
“Do you work here?” You asked, and you mentally facepalmed yourself.
What a stupid question? As if the red and green outfit paired with a santa hat and elf ears didn’t give it away.
He chuckled. “No, I just like dressing up as one of Santa’s little helpers in my free time.”
You couldn’t help but smile at his joke.
“My family owns the business, so I work here to help them.” The boy said.
His tone was very soft, almost as if he was afraid to speak any louder. He had a calming presence about him that spread throughout the store. You have to admit, despite not even knowing his name, you did enjoy being around him. It was more interesting than just dragging along behind your mother, that’s for sure.
The boy gave you a small smile before holding his hand out. “I’m Jacob. Jacob Bae.”
You smiled, gently gripping his hand. The handshake was firm, yet soft. His skin was smooth with just the slightest bit of a tan. He had a natural warmth to him that spread throughout your body when his hand touched yours.
“Do you run the store by yourself?” You asked Jacob.
He nodded his head. “I have a brother, but he’s busy with his own things. My parents bought the store when we were both little, and then when I got old enough they decided to just let me run the store by myself.”
“This doesn’t get boring?”
Jacob chuckled again, and you couldn’t help but blush. His laugh gave way to the most breathtaking smile.
“I wouldn’t say boring. Slow, yes, but definitely not boring. There’s not a single thing about Christmas that is boring to me.” Jacob exclaimed with a smile.
You rolled your eyes slightly. “I could give you multiple reasons why Christmas is boring.”
The boy let out a little giggle, looking away at a small family picking out a pretty antique ornament.
“I get the feeling you aren’t a big fan of Christmas.” Jacob said softly.
This time it was your turn to let out a small chuckle.
“You have no idea.” You muffled out under your breath.
You heard a cart making its way around the corner of an aisle filled with toy soldiers and nutcrackers as you let out a sigh. Your mother’s head reared around the corner as she smiled.
“Look at all of this beautiful stuff I found. This store is amazing!” Your mother said rather loudly.
You covered your face as you watched Jacob round the counter to begin checking out your mother.
“Mom, you are being so loud.”
“Oh hush. I’m just enjoying your beautiful store.” She said, directing her attention towards Jacob.
Jacob gave her a wide smile. “I appreciate it! We love spreading Christmas cheer.”
Your mother began to unload the cart of Christmas decorations onto the conveyor belt as Jacob began to scan the items. Your mother made small talk with the boy, asking him about his parents, his brother, etc. You stared at your mother, realizing that she really visited this store more than she let on. The personal questions and conversation she was having with the boy you were meeting for the very first time made you frown. You have been missing so much due to your own heartbreak, you could’ve been meeting new people, making new friends.
“Jacob, do you have any plans for Christmas? I know your family is traveling to see your brother.” Your mom asked.
You lifted your head, clearing the negative thoughts that were starting to creep in. Jacob shook his head with a smile.
“Working.” He said softly.
“On Christmas?” You asked, surprising not only your mother but yourself considering you would rather work on Christmas than celebrate it.
Jacob nodded. “Someone’s gotta keep the store open. You’d be surprised at the amount of people who come in for last minute items on Christmas Eve and Christmas day. When every other store is closed, we’re their last resort.”
You frowned. You don’t know why, but you felt bad about the fact that Jacob would be working on Christmas instead of taking the day off. Your mother continued to chat with Jacob, letting him gently bag each item, taking the time to wrap the more delicate ones in pretty tissue paper decorated with candy canes. Your mother took the bags from him, handing them off to you as she pulled out your father’s credit card to pay the bill. Jacob had graciously given your mother a nice discount, noting that she is always his favorite customer making you wonder just how often your mother visits this store. She grabbed the final bags, heading for the door as you followed her before stopping.
“Hey, Jacob. Do you want some company here? You shouldn’t be alone on the holidays. Maybe I could come help you?” You asked softly.
He replied just as softly. “I’d love that.”
You gave him a smile, as you headed out the door to catch up with your mom.
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Now that you had something to actually look forward to, the rest of the day dragged on. You didn’t think it would ever end, but when you got up this morning you were in an incredibly good mood. Your parents couldn’t help but point out how chipper you were this morning either.
“Someone has you really happy today,” Your mother started.
With a nod of your head, you grabbed a muffin for a quick breakfast. “I’ll be gone for most of the day. I should be home before dinner.”
Your parents could only nod, happy that you would be at least getting out of the house instead of spending the entire vacation locked in your room.
The car ride downtown to the small Christmas shop was short, but with how much you were anticipating seeing Jacob again, it made the ride seem all that much longer. When you pulled into the parking lot, you parked next to the only other car there.
The roads were almost completely empty, aside from people pulling sleds in the deep snow on the sidewalks. You turned your car off, getting out and locking the door behind you as you headed towards the entrance of the store.
You noticed Jacob laying out empty cups by a small hot chocolate station. He laid out candy canes, whipped cream, and marshmallows, setting them all up in a certain way. Smiling to yourself, you opened the door to the shop as you let the little overhead bell ring above you, alerting Jacob of your arrival.
He turned from his spot by the hot chocolate station as you waved.
“Hey! You made it!” Jacob said excitedly.
You giggled with a nod as Jacob reached an arm behind the counter. He pulled a green Santa hat with fancy, red decorations adorning it with him as he handed it to you.
“Since it’s your first day, I won’t make you wear the elf ears. However, I can’t say no to the hat. This is nonnegotiable.”
He hands the hat to you as you quietly put it on before striking a pose.
“How do I look?” You asked.
Jacob could only laugh. “Do I dare say it was made for you?”
You and him laughed as he led you around the store. He let you in on different products, the stuff that sells the best and the worst, the regular customers (no surprise your mom was on the list), and so much more.
“The store will be slow most of the time. I usually take that time to just sit in the back until the bell rings.” He said.
You looked at the door behind the counter as you spoke. “What’s in the back?”
Jacob grinned. “My little hideaway. You might like it; not as much Christmas back there.”
His comment made heat rise to your neck and cheeks as he continued to explain stuff to you. You tried your hardest to focus on what he was saying, but you would be lying if you claimed that you heard anything that came out of his mouth. Jacob was just too damn handsome for his own good. He wasn’t necessarily the tallest, but he definitely wasn’t short. He had broad shoulders that lead down to a slim waist and long legs. His face had a more squared off look than an angular one. His jawline was impeccable. He had full lips that were constantly hidden by the beautiful smile he was consistently flashing to everyone. You couldn’t lie, though. The best thing about Jacob, in your opinion, was his kindness. You hadn’t known him long, but his heart was so pure. He was nothing but kind to everyone he came in contact with, and you came up with all of this information in just one and a half days.
“So that’s pretty much all there is to it. A pretty easy gig, right?” Jacob asked.
You just stared at him for a moment before shaking your head slightly, snapping out of your thoughts.
“Huh? Oh yeah. Sure sounds like it.” You replied.
Jacob stared back at you, a sly smile making its way to his face. “Well, let’s get you settled on the register then.”
Jacob led you back through the store, which seemed a lot bigger inside than it looked on the outside. You let him lead you again as he pulled out a stool, motioning for you to sit. He showed you all the usual steps to do in order to check out a customer before officially opening the store.
The day went by rather slow. You and Jacob really got to know each other due to the slowness. He told you more about his family, more about his brother, who he looks up to a lot.
“He’s my best friend. We are inseparable when we’re together. We talk everyday when we’re apart.” Jacob told you with a smile.
The statement made you smile. Being an only child meant that you had to get creative when it came to finding people to talk to every day. You loved your parents, but you could only talk to them so much in a day.
“Do you have siblings?” Jacob asked.
You shook your head. “I have a best friend named Chanhee. He’s like my brother. We talk all the time, he’s my roommate, we have all the same classes. I adore that boy.”
Jacob nodded with a small smile, continuing to watch out the shop windows for a customer as you just continued to watch the gingerbread clock tick away ever so slowly.
As the day came to an end, you helped Jacob box up certain things. He packed up the hot chocolate station, making you a cup for the road before setting everything in the back room. Jacob helped you close out the register, and you helped him sweep up the fake snow that had fallen off the fake Christmas trees in front of the store. He grabbed a ring of keys before pulling that hat he had on for his head, revealing his dark brown hair that fell every which way after being confined in a hat all day long. You both walked to the door, letting Jacob set an alarm hidden behind a picture frame before he walked out with you behind him. He turned to lock the doors before walking you to your car.
“Aside from it being really slow, which I apologize for, how was your first day?” Jacob asked sweetly.
You smiled at him. “I had a lot of fun, Jacob. You kept me good company.”
Jacob smiled at your statement. “Hopefully I’ll see you back here again then.”
“Definitely.”
Jacob opened your car door for you, allowing you to get situated before closing the door gently. You watched him trudge through the slightly fresh snow on the ground to his own car. He got in, quickly turning it on before looking out his window to wave to you.
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The week before Christmas went exactly like this. You would get up in a good mood, grab a muffin, drive to the Christmas Shop, and sit for six hours with Jacob. You had to admit; you were having a lot of fun. He was funny. Really funny. He didn’t try too hard. You remembered always forcing laughter when it comes to Sunwoo and his jokes. They were okay, but they weren’t knock-your-socks-off funny.
Something else about Jacob? He was an incredible singer. During a particularly slow part of your fourth day working at the Christmas shop, Jacob brought you to the back room. It was almost like a small in and out apartment. There was a pull out couch, a flat screen tv, and a coffee table neatly set up. There was a counter against the back wall that held a mini fridge, a microwave, air fryer, and a coffee maker. In the corner not occupied by anything, was a beautiful dark redwood acoustic guitar. He left the back door open to keep an eye on the front of the store as he strummed a beautiful tune, singing ever so softly to you. You couldn’t believe your ears.
“Why haven’t you taken on a singing career?” You asked him curiously.
Jacob smiled as he continued to softly play the guitar. “As much as I adore music, I never really felt like I was destined for that kind of life. I like what I’ve got going here.”
“Just working at a Christmas shop? This is what you like?” You asked, a tilt of your head to emphasize your questions.
Your question caught Jacob off guard. What you didn’t know was that no one in his family would ever hold him back, but he would hold himself back. He had his reasons for not wanting to pursue a music career despite everyone telling him to. He had never ever talked to anyone about said problems. You, however, seemed different. He wanted to tell you everything. Instead, he stuck with asking some hard hitting questions himself.
“Why do you hate Christmas so much?” Jacob asked.
Your head straightened at his question. You had never had someone straight out ask you about your dislike of Christmas.
“I don’t.”
Jacob raised an eyebrow as he stopped playing. “You don’t?”
You shook your head. “I don’t particularly like Christmas, but I don’t hate it. I know I say I do, but I don’t think I ever really could. Plus working here with you has made me regain some love for it.”
He grinned at your comment before lifting his index, wiggling it at you. “While I appreciate the compliment, you aren’t getting off that easily.”
A sigh escaped your lips as you took a deep breath. “I didn’t always hate Christmas. In fact, I used to love it. The decorations, the weather, the movies. All of it. Then I met my ex, and things changed.”
You looked at Jacob who had a solemn look in his dark brown eyes, silently begging for you to continue.
“He became my entire world. I would have done anything for him, but clearly he wouldn’t have done the same. It’s stupid really. All my friends told me he was bad news and I never listened. I believed him over them. I always took his side and two holidays ago, our first Christmas together, he cheated on me. Come to find out he had been for a really long time,” You stopped to take in a breath, feeling a tear roll down your cheek. “I was devastated. He ruined my Christmas, and I let that suck the joy for the holiday right out of me.”
Jacob handed you a tissue as you dabbed at your face. You shook your head.
“I’m so stupid.”
“No you’re not. There’s nothing stupid about being in love with someone. What’s stupid is said person being dumb enough to actually take advantage of you. You deserve better.” Jacob said quietly.
A small, shy smile made its way to your face.
He watched you before speaking again. “I’m sorry that that happened to you. You deserve so much better, truly. If it makes you feel any better, I adore spending this little bit of time that we spend together. You make the day more fun. I have someone to talk to, to share stories with. I don’t have to talk to the toy soldiers anymore. I felt like they might have started to talk back had you not asked to help out.”
You let out a loud laugh. “It does make me feel better. Actually, working here makes me feel like I’m getting my Christmas spirit back. I have had the absolute best time this vacation. Which is a first for me because I was really expecting to just shove my face with my moms sugar cookies and drown myself in hot chocolate while watching sad romance movies.”
This time Jacob laughed out loud.
“Your mom’s sugar cookies are amazing!” Jacob let out.
You both laughed at his statement as a comfortable silence fell over the both of you. The day went by pretty fast after that. You both did your normal closing routines, becoming a good team when it came to picking up the store. This time, you set the alarm and locked the door. Jacob, like he did every night, walked you to your car to make sure you were safe.
As he opened the door, he spoke. “I have another question.”
You nodded, urging him to continue.
“I really like doing this with you.”
You smiled, before teasing him. “That’s not a question, Jacob.”
Jacob chuckled. “You’re right, and neither is this.”
As soon as you noticed him leaning in, your eyes closed. You braced for impact and it was the softest impact ever made. His lips were almost feather-like, they were so soft. Your mouth moved in sync with his as you brought your hands up to the back of his neck, willing him to move closer. Jacob’s hands landed at your waist, doing exactly what you hoped for as he pulled you closer.
Jacob pulled away first, letting you both catch your breath as your eyes fluttered open. You felt like you were flying right now. Jacob’s kiss had riding a high you had definitely never experienced before. Your eyes trailed up to his as he gave you a shy smile.
“That wasn’t a question. You are correct about that, but I definitely liked it.” You whispered into the cold air.
He chuckled as he stepped back from you. He gave you another kiss, this time on the cheek as he whispered a soft goodbye to you before heading towards his car. You watched him walk away before yelling out to him.
“Jacob!”
The boy stopped in his tracks, turning around almost instantly.
“Do you want to join my family for Christmas dinner tomorrow?”
A smile broke out onto his face as he nodded. “I’d love that!”
You couldn’t help but let a big smile make its way to your face as you lit up. He gave you another wave before getting into his car. Watching him pull out of the parking lot, you felt oddly giddy over the fact that you were actually looking forward to a Christmas event for the first time in almost a year.
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Just like every morning so far this week, you woke up in a very good mood on Christmas day. You ran down the stairs, ready to eat breakfast, open your gifts and get the day started. Your parents handed out gifts, setting them in groups in front of each of you. Tearing into your gifts, you neatly piled everything up before heading upstairs. You felt a tad bit guilty considering you rushed through the gifts, but you couldn’t help yourself. You were so excited to see Jacob. You wanted this dinner to be perfect. After what’s been growing between the two of you to the kiss just last night, you wanted to see where this would go. You had never felt this way about anyone.
The shower you took was long, considering you practiced what you were going to say to Jacob over and over as if you were giving a speech after winning the nobel prize. You were nervous to say the least. After turning into a raisin due to standing in the shower for so long, you finally got out to dry yourself off. You went through your skin care routine as usual before walking into your room. The air hitting your skin was cool as you picked out an outfit.
As you laid the clothes out on your bed you noticed a photo on your photo board. It was hidden behind photos of your cousins and friends. It was a picture of you and Sunwoo, after your first date. He had insisted on taking a photo to capture the moment because he felt as though he had ‘never met anyone like you’. You had hid the photo after what he did to you, but now, you didn’t want to hide it anymore. You pulled the tack that was holding it off the board. The photo slid before you caught it, letting your fingers run over the photo. For once, you didn’t feel sad looking at the photo. In fact, you didn’t feel anything.
You brought the photo with you and laid it on your bed. Throwing your clothes on, you grabbed the photo and headed to the office your parents had. There was a small paper shredder underneath the computer desk that you pulled out and plugged in. The machine started to hum as you looked over the photo again. You weren't the same person in this photo anymore, and boy was Chanhee going to be so proud about what you were about to do.
“Goodbye Sunwoo.” You said to yourself.
You dropped the photo into the top of the shredder, listening to the machine growl and grind the photo up. It felt like a weight had been lifted off of your shoulders. You let out a content sigh as you unplugged the machine and headed back downstairs to spend time with your parents.
The day dragged on for you, and to be honest, you hated it. When late afternoon rolled around, you started to get butterflies in your stomach. Your mother was putting finishing touches on Christmas dinner when there was a knock on the door. You jumped up from the couch, practically gliding to the door as you pulled it open. Jacob held a bouquet of pretty flowers in his hand as he smiled. He was looking insanely handsome, but you could tell that he was also extremely nervous. Well that made two of you.
“Hi,” You breathed out.
Jacob’s face lit up at the sound of your voice. “Hi.”
You two just stood at the door, basking in each other’s glory before you heard your mom speak.
“Well don’t make him freeze. Invite the boy in!”
You snapped out of your little school girl crush trance as you stepped off to the side, allowing Jacob to enter. That’s when you noticed the wrapped gifts he was holding off to the side of himself.
He handed you the roses, leaning down just slightly to peck your cheek as he whispered to you. “You look beautiful.”
A shy smile popped up on your face as he pulled back to hug your parents. Your mom took the gifts from him, laying them on the coffee table. She pulled him into the dining room, practically pushing him into a chair as you followed. You sat across from him, while your parents continued to run around the kitchen to finish everything. Jacob turned to watch them before turning back to you.
“Do they need help?” He pointed towards your parents.
You shook your head with a laugh. “Not at all. Trust me, they’re fine.”
Jacob nodded. He looked over at you before speaking again.
“I couldn't stop thinking about you. I know that’s crazy to say, but that kiss was magical.”
You leaned forward, practically laying on the table in an attempt to get closer to Jacob, and he was doing the same thing.
“I’m glad you said it. I’ll be honest with you, though. I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you since we met.” You told him.
Jacob leaned closer as his eyes flickered down to your lips. You couldn’t fight back the smile as you, too, leaned in closer. Just when it seemed your lips were about to touch, your mother called out.
“Jacob, sweetie, I hope you’re hungry! I made a lot of food.”
You let out a little sigh of frustration as you and Jacob backed off of each other. Your mother and father began carrying food out to the table as they laid it all out in front of you two. The next hour and a half was absolute torture for you. The only thing you could do was sneak adoring glances at Jacob from across the table as your parents chatted his ears off.
If you thought the two of you were being subtle with the glances you were totally wrong. When dinner was done, your father brought Jacob into the living room so you could help your mom clear the table. You watched your dad grab a gift that Jacob had brought as they both talked, smiles on both of their faces.
“So, when were you going to tell me that you and Jacob are dating?” Your mom asked from behind you, hands shoved into soapy dish water.
You turned to her. “Dating? Mom, Jacob and I aren’t dating.”
She chuckled. “Could’ve fooled me.”
Letting out a sigh, you leaned into one of the counters across from her, effectively blocking your view of Jacob and your father.
“We aren’t dating. We’ve kissed, though.”
Your mother gasped excitedly, pulling her hands out of the water to clap. You laughed as she created tiny bubbles in the air from the suds clinging to her skin.
“You don’t know how long I’ve wanted you to meet him. I was always hesitant to introduce the two of you because of, well,” Your mom trailed off.
She didn’t need to finish for you to know who she was talking about.
“I know. I’m glad you introduced us this year though. For the first time in a long time, I’ve enjoyed Christmas.” You told her.
She smiled as someone knocked on the counter. You both turned towards Jacob who had a wrapped present in his hand.
“I don’t mean to interrupt, but I got you a gift.” His hand reaches out to you in an attempt to extend the Christmas present.
Your mom smiled. “I’ll give you two a minute.”
As she slipped past Jacob, he watched her leave before looking back at you.
“Go ahead. Open it.”
You chuckled at his urgency as you tore the wrapping paper, giving way to a blank cardboard box. You set it on the counter, opening the top of the box. Your eyes widened slightly as you pulled styrofoam out of the box.
“Jacob, you didn’t.” You whispered as the boy smiled.
Pulling the styrofoam apart, there was a beautiful, antique snow globe sitting in front of you. The bottom of the snow globe was gold with red and silver accents. A molded design of Santa and his reindeer going across the gold base. The globe itself was crystal clear, and it had the Christmas shop planted in the middle of it with a tiny gingerbread man standing outside waving. When you shook it, the globe lit up in all sorts of pretty colors as the snow fell around the structure. You had been eyeballing the snow globe since you walked into the shop, constantly mentioning how pretty it was. The kicker was that with it being an antique, it was pricey. So you opted for admiring it from afar.
“I figured I owe you one. You kept me from going insane. I’d never admit this, but you’re right. It does get boring there when it’s slow.”
You giggled. “Took you long enough to admit it.”
Jacob stepped closer. “Well, you kept me company. You are definitely not boring.”
Looking up from the snowglobe, you smiled at the boy. “Jacob, this is beautiful and amazing. Thank you.”
He nodded. “You’re amazing.”
There was no hesitation this time as Jacob leaned in to kiss you. He brought his hands to your waist, not wanting to be any farther apart from you than he already was. Your hands rested on his chest as you pulled apart, leaning your forehead against his.
“Now I feel bad,” You stated, making the boy look at you with a confused look. “I didn’t get you anything.”
He threw his head back with a laugh. “You most definitely got me something. This has probably been the best Christmas I’ve ever had, and that’s because of you. So thank you.”
“So,” You said, bringing your hands up to wrap around his neck. “I guess this means we’re dating now?”
Jacob chuckled. “Woah! At least let me take you on a date first.”
He pecked your lips before pulling away, keeping a firm grip on your hand. You grabbed the snowglobe as he led you into the family room where your parents were. Sitting on the couch, he wrapped an arm around you as he pecked your forehead. You smiled to yourself as you snuggled into the boy’s side. This Christmas was definitely going in the memory books.
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hyungseos-cafe · 2 months
Text
fellow baristas!
here at hyungseos-cafe, we've interacted with some amazing fellow cafes and their baristas. below is a list of wonderful individuals we've had the honor of meeting along with their signature drinks!
list is to expand as i interact with more of you (:
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☆ cafe: @biaswreckingfics
★ the barista: britt
⤷ signature drink: ❝ my family think's we're dating ❞ | menu
+eee i wish this were longer ∪>⸝⸝⸝⸝<∪ like imagine the conversations their families would be having behind the scenes and the chaos that would ensue once they find out sangyeon and reader are actually dating eeeeee
☆ cafe: @cloverdaisies
★ the barista: clover
⤷ signature drink: ❝ HEY CHAT! ∩^ω^∩ ❞ | menu
+ okay so i wrote a lot under my rb, but you did a fantastic job with is one. and again, i know nothing about gaming, but hey if there's a cute streamer i'm watching haha. but seriously, i loved the details of the cute usernames and comments. the interactions between hyunjae and reader was so cute and super fun to imagine hehe
☆ cafe: @from-izzy
★ the barista: izzy
⤷ signature drink: ❝ i'm home ❞ | menu
+ this one really hit home and was so comforting to read. i really felt like izzy wrote exactly what goes through my mind when presented with new opportunities. highly recommend reading if you're experiencing something similar!
☆ cafe: @littleroaes
★ the barista: dora
⤷ signature drink: ❝ enchanted ( to meet you ) ❞ | menu
+ umm?? i am kinda floored with how cute and soft this juyeon wt w?? "i just want us" will forever be iconic and soft and just? i just want what they have :(( but you did such a great job hehe i'm so excited to read more from you!
☆ cafe: @mars101
★ the barista: mars
⤷ signature drink: ❝ insomnia ❞ | menu
+ exes to lovers! everybody cheer! i love exes to lovers so much! literally one of my fav tropes! the part where reader and seonghwa "accidently" kiss falling down the snowy hill had me kicking my feet in absolute glee
☆ cafe: @sungbeam
★ the barista: duckie
⤷ signature drink: ❝ simple gifts ❞ | menu
+ i'm pretty sure i've read this story like 3 times already? i love how you wrote chanhee so much like he seems so cold, but in reality he has so much love for you and he just wants the best for you.
☆ cafe: @tristeetconfus
★ the barista: ave
⤷ signature drink: ❝ iced oat latte, extra shot ❞ | menu
+ listen.... when i tell you i love ave with my entire heart, i mean it. maybe it's because i've known them for so long, but someone please go tell ave that their writing is phenomenal. they hear it from me all the time lol. anyways, seonghwa + coffee = love. literally if you haven't read this yet, do yourself a favor and please do. while you're at it, check out their entire masterlist too!!
☆ cafe: @winterchimez
★ the barista: ally
⤷ signature drink: ❝ nightmare before christmas ❞ | menu
+ to reiterate. ally. what. the. fuck. if you haven't read this already, please read!!! true crime and horror fics always intrigue me and this had the perfect balance of the two with a very sinister twist that i honestly wasn't prepared for.
☆ cafe: @zzoguri
★ the barista: moni
⤷ signature drink: ❝ with every storm, i have you ❞ | menu
+ i still can't believe you wrote my inner thoughts lol i really loved this fic though, it's among the few fics where i felt really seen as a person. idk i just love how you write and it all felt so natural and real. like if i had a partner this is how our dynamics are yknow?
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jiseokerina · 8 months
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★ SER ATÉ QUE NÃO SEJAMOS MAIS 𓏲 uso pessoal.
ㅤㅤເ 🗯 finalmente decidi postar uma fic, né? já tava na hora rs... bom, acho que vocês vão conhecer bastante de mim por ela, pois, além de ter insp na m��sica She´s In The Rain do The Rose, também é baseada nos meus sentimentos mais profundos e nos meus desejos mais inalcançáveis. espero que gostem!!
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ethereal-engene · 1 year
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Radiant Rec List #4 (98z line)
please give all of your love to these lovely writers!! I have had the time of life with these fics and enjoy reading!!
full rec list for tbz
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Quick Key: [F] - fluff  | [A] - angst | [H] - humor/crack | [S] - suggestive
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Juyeon
OPERATION: PRINCESS' JOURNAL (SMAU series) by @luvrbin | [F] + [H] + [A] (top 5 smaus i have ever read tbh, the tears out of sadness and laughter >>)
MY FIRST AND LAST . . . 이주연 ! by @woobly | [F]
officially yours by @hvae | [F] + [A]
safety net by @saltyboyz | [F] + [A]
the lifeguard who hated summer break by @nyuqvrse​ | [F] + [A] (one of the 1st fics I ever read and *chef’s kiss*)
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Kevin (Hyungseo)
22:07pm by @mae-gi-writes | [F] + tiny bit of [A]
cool it by @kpop-in-new-albion | [F] (oh so fluffy)
did you remember me? by @bawdyboyz | [A] + [F]
00:00 by @hvae | [F] + [A] (ouch, this one </3)
iced americano by @jumilkies | [A] + [F]
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New (Chanhee)
a pretty bouquet by @cupidjyu | [F] 
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Q (Changmin)
Break Your Rules (SMAU series) by @bbangsoonie | [F] + [A] + [H]
11:11 by @bbangsoonie | [A] + [F] (😭 i cried so much reading this)
someone to you by @atbzkingdom | [A] + [F] + [H]
yellow carnations by @pockyandme | [A]
out of the blue (SMAU series) by @flrtwoo | [F] + [H] + lil bit of [A] (bye, this was so funny, I enjoyed it very much)
dance with my demons by @changminurheart | [A] + [F]
Best Friends Don’t Lie by @inadaydream99 | [F] + [A]
ghost of you by @sungbeam​ | [A] + [H] + [F]
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last updated: 03/19/2023 
WHERE ARE ALL OF THE FICS FOR NEW? sobbing
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lovesick-boyz · 1 year
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♡ cupid’s library ♡
important note: these are all written with an afab!reader in mind, unless specifically stated otherwise at the start of each individual fic. this masterlist also includes fics containing smut so please do not read if you are a minor. 18+ only.
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key: fluff (❀) | angst (✰) | smut (❦)
[WIP] = this fic is currently being written
[coming soon!] = still fleshing out the plot
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— lee sangyeon
Fix Him First [ ✰ + ❦ ] [coming soon!]
The new transfer student was definitely going to be a problem. Luckily, you have quite the reputation of being a ‘problem-solver’.
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— bae joonyoung / jacob
Good for You [ ❀ ] [coming soon!]
Your husband always knows exactly what you need, when you need it.
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— kim younghoon
A Taste of Her Own Medicine [ ❦ ]
You made Younghoon’s life a living hell. It’s only fair that you should be the one to show him heaven too.
Hopelessly Devoted [ ✰ ] [WIP]
♡ Part II [ ❦ ] [WIP]
You and Younghoon made a promise to each other when you were both younger, but you seem to have already forgotten it. He hopes that one day you'll remember. Or else he'll have to remind you himself.
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— lee jaehyun / hyunjae
I’d Hate to Love You [coming soon!]
Love is… confusing, to say the least. One thing you're completely sure of, though, is that you absolutely despise Lee Hyunjae. It's just the truth.
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— lee juyeon
Unfair [coming soon!]
“When you smile at me like that, it’s hard for me not to feel anything." Hanahaki Disease!AU
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— moon hyungseo / kevin
Last First Love [coming soon!]
Soulmate!AU
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— choi chanhee / new
Framed and Hung [coming soon!]
Ocean’s movie trilogy inspired. Criminal!AU
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— ji changmin / q
The Problem with Falling in Love [ ✰ ] [WIP]
Changmin is the perfect boyfriend. Kind, caring, loyal and thoughtful, it’s not difficult for him to make your heart flutter. Or at least he seems to be. Too bad he's not yours.
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— ju haknyeon
Ideal Type [coming soon!]
In every lifetime, it's always been you. Time Travel!AU
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— kim sunwoo
Only Lovers Left Alive [coming soon!]
For better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, until death do us part. But even death won’t tear this love apart. Vampire!AU
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— sohn youngjae / eric
Hey, Playboy! [coming soon!]
“You knew everything from the start and yet you’re blaming it all on me?” In that moment, all you wanted to do was kiss- no, slap! Yes, slap that smirk off Eric’s face. You totally meant slap. Ugh, what’s wrong with you today?
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deoboyznet · 7 months
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we are so excited to welcome you to 𝐃𝐄𝐎𝐁𝐎𝐘𝐙𝐍𝐄𝐓, @hyungseos-cafe ! hope you enjoy your stay <3
now that you're here, pls note the following:
use the tracking tag #deoboyznet in the first three tags of ur post, and you can also @ the net directly to ensure that the admin sees it!
put a visible link to the net on your blog somewhere! can be a direct @ or url
adhere to the fic guidelines and house rules !!
if you change your url, let the admin know
otherwise, any other questions can be sent to our ask box or to the admin directly!
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sanaxo-o · 2 months
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Fell in love all over again (Lee Jaehyun)
Warnings/genre: pure fluff, established relationship, making out, the reader overthinks for a while, Hyunjae is the cutest at the end, comfort (?)
Word count: 1,423
Sana: hello..um my Valentine’s Day fic but very late so meh. I was studying for my exams and shit. Tbh it was originally supposed to be for Jacob but he did not fit the vibes and this was also sitting in my drafts for a while so yeah. Anyways this is dedicated to my @from-izzy (don’t divorce me lmao) love you <3 and thank you to @astrae4 for beta reading 🥺. Love you hon 🥰
Tagging: @cloverdaisies @kimsohn @mosviqu @hyungseos-cafe @strayed-quokka @deoboyznet
✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨✨
Sitting down at the table, you looked around the place, it was a place you would always dream about.
A huge hall with a chandelier in the middle— which was full of diamonds making it shine brightly. You let out a small laugh of content when you notice the ring on your finger.
Never would you have imagined that you would get married to the person you spent seven years of your life with.
You have known Hyunjae since you were in highschool and up until now. And he had managed to prove himself that he was the one for you countless times.
The day you felt alone and needed comfort, he was there for you with a tub full of ice cream and a night full of cuddles as he listened to you talk about your feelings; how you would sometimes just get the feeling of being alone as if no one was on your side and you were left to fight your battles all alone.
But he was there to prove you wrong. To tell you that even though you felt as if you were alone he would always be there by your side with open arms. No matter what happens, he always got your back.
That was also the time when you were damn sure that he was gonna be the man you would want to get married to. No one else would be able to have your heart like he has.
The day you got into your dream university, he was there to celebrate it with you. Even when you doubted yourself about not being worthy enough he made himself clear that you’re in fact one of the people who truly deserve that spot because of your hard work.
You look around the place once more and you could suddenly feel your heart sinking, what if this was not the right thing to do?
You could feel your hand start to shake. All you wanted to do at that very moment was to get up and just storm out of the place, but you were afraid to do that.
It was Valentine’s Day and Hyunjae prepared all of this just for you only to see you storm out like that. You did not want to seem ungrateful so you tried to calm yourself down but the more you pondered about your future the more anxious you got.
From the corner of your eyes you noticed hyunjae walking back to the table. Taking a deep breath in you tried to look normal but as the time passed by, every passing second felt like hours.
Placing your hand under the table you kept your other hand over it in hope that it would stop shaking but it was of no use.
Looking up you observed as Hyunjae took a seat in front of you. Giving you a small smile he poured you a glass of champagne and raised his to make a toast with you.
Holding the glass in a tight grip you clink your glass with his as you take a small sip from it, “Happy Valentine’s Day love. I hope you like what I prepared for us.” Hyunjae says with a soft smile playing on his lips as he takes a sip of champagne from his own glass.
Passing him a small smile you anxiously look around the place, not having it in you to look him in the eye. You knew how happy he was and you did not want to ruin this moment with him just because of what you were feeling.
You knew thinking so ahead in the future was stupid but what could you do? Your habit of overthinking always got the best of you…
“Are you okay?” You snap out of your thoughts when you hear Hyunjae’s voice. Looking back at him you nod your head slightly but you notice how his eyes searched for yours.
You could see the slight flicker in them as he placed his glass of champagne back on the table. Standing up he forwarded his hand towards you as he waited for you to take his hand in yours.
Without any questions asked you grab his hand in yours as you stand up from your seat, “Do you trust me?” Hyunjae asks as he walks towards the exit with his hand hooked with yours.
Giving him a small nod you continue walking with him, “What about the food though?” You ask softly as you stop on your tracks which made him halt in his tracks to turn around and face you.
“Don’t worry. We can come back later, I cannot let you go back home empty stomach now, can I?” Hyunjae says with a grin on his face as he drags you towards his car.
Opening the backseat door he lets you enter the car first as he himself enters once he’s sure that you’re comfortable sitting in the seat.
“What’s wrong, hmm?” Hyunjae asked softly as he tangled his hands in your luscious hair. Pushing the strands of hair behind your ear, he slowly made his fingers come to your forehead as he applied slight pressure on them to give you a massage.
Closing your eyes at his actions you let your head rest against the seat as you take in deep breaths to calm your heart down, “I don’t know, aren’t we too young to get married? What if something goes wrong? I don’t want to lose you..” you tell him, your voice barely above a whisper as you slowly look towards Hyunjae who continues to stare at you with his soft gaze.
“No, I don’t think we’re too young. We’re both financially stable at the moment and I believe in the fact that nothing would go wrong. Our love is strong enough for that sweetheart..” he says as he gently pulls you closer towards him in the backseat of the car.
Resting your head against his chest you close your eyes as you listen to his heartbeat, “Promise me that you won’t leave me alone? Ever..” you whisper with your face buried in his chest as Hyunjae continues to stroke your hair in a gentle manner.
“I promise I will never leave you alone. Ever..” he says as he brings his hand towards your chin and makes you look up.
Leaning down he slowly attaches his lips on yours, sitting up straight you tangle your hands in his soft curly hair as you pull on them while Hyunjae continues to kiss you.
You could feel your heart come up in your throat as he continued to kiss you, his hands wrapping around your waist as he pulled you closer towards him if that was even possible.
Pulling away, you gasped for air as you noticed the string of saliva which was connecting you both together, an indication of the intense makeup session you just had. Staring into his eyes you leaned closer towards him once again as you gave his nose a light peck.
Nuzzling his face in the crook of your neck, Hyunjae smiled as hugged your figure closer to his warm embrace, “I think I just fell in love with you all over again..” Hyunjae mumbled in the crook of your neck. His voice sends vibrations throughout your whole body as you give out a small laugh at his words.
“Every minute of the day makes me fall in love with you even more if you’re wondering..” you tell him while playing with his hair.
You don't even know when you sat on his lap in the backseat like this but all you know is that this Valentine’s Day was a day to remember.
Stealing a glance at hyunjae you let out a giggle when you notice his ears turning a shade of bright red.
“Are you blushing because of what I said or because of the make out session we just had?” You say in a slightly teasing tone as you poke his cheeks with your fingers.
Looking back up Hyunjae looks everywhere but you, “Oh look at the time. We should head back inside to have our dinner..” he says trying to change the subject.
Opening the door of the car he lets you get down first before he got out. Locking the car you both started walking towards the hall again with your laughter beaming through the night.
The moonlight shining its light on the two of you making it look like a scene right out of a romantic movie.
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svhnflwr · 2 years
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%! i'll wait — valentine's event
× kevin moon: "if you're not ready for a kiss yet, that's ok"
fluff, non-idol au, new couple things, this prompt screams kevin to me, MOM I WANT SOMEONE LIKE HIM ☹️💓
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You could feel your palms slowly becoming clammy, your forehead building a thin film of sweat, and your heart felt like it was beating 200 kilometers an hour. Your body was mixing up whether the feeling was positive or not, but your mind was screaming at its highest volume.
Your face was so close yet so far from Kevin's, but you could feel the tension in between and the space felt like it was getting shorter and shorter, even if it wasn't.
Nervousness crept up through every fibre in your body.
Your body had very opposing responses. On one hand, more than anything you wanted to pull him in by his neck to connect your lips together and experience the magical feeling of kissing your boyfriend of a few months.
On another, you were unsure if that was what you actually wanted, and more so scared if it wasn’t what Kevin wanted.
Your breathing slowed, the tension for you was too much. You were already unconsciously leaning a little more towards him, but also leaving enough space between you two. You wanted him to do the move first. That way you wouldn’t have to blame yourself for any rash movements.
Kevin mirrored your slow movements forward. This was what you wanted right?
You closed your eyes shut, almost bracing for impact. Impact? Not the most flattering words to use to describe your first kiss with your partner.
He could feel the tension in your movements, or more so the lack thereof.
His hand rose to gently cup your face. You opened your eyes when you felt his cold fingertips slowly caress your cheek. Your eyes locked at the close distance, his tender eyes making you feel all warm and fuzzy in your chest.
“If you’re not ready for a kiss yet, that’s ok,” he said in a low tone. The blooming feeling on your chest spreaded throughout your body until you felt tingles till your fingertips. You loved him so damn much. A newfound comfort settled on your shoulders as you leaned into him for a tight embrace.
Kevin’s hands ran up and down your back slowly as he whispered beside your ear.
“I’ll wait until you’re ready, however long that may take.”
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ahloveisboo · 2 years
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i've had this in my drafts for weeks and i can't sleep so i finished it. was supposed to be angsty, i think, but this is what it turned into. // slice of life, friends to lovers au?, confession, mentions of alcohol, minor swearing, you have a ginormous crush on kevin moon, wc: no idea i wrote this on my phone
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[3:17am]
"Sunwoo?"
You blink at your phone screen, reaffirming the caller ID before putting the device back to your ear. "You better have a good excuse calling me at 3AM."
The person on the other end sighs, followed by a brief pause. "Y/N, I need you to come pick up Sunwoo." His words are a little slurred, but there's no mistaking the soft timbre of Kevin's voice. "He's shitfaced, both Sangyeon and I have drank too much to drive him home, and Jacob is leaving for Paris in the morning so he left like, 2 hours ago."
It takes a second for the request to sink in, sleep still riddling your brain. "You know I don't have a car."
"Sangyeon's parked around the corner," Kevin says, sucking in a deep breath in between words. "Get a taxi here, you can drive his car home."
"Kevin-,"
He lets out a little whine, stretching out your name as he calls you through the phone. "Please? We-," another pause, "I didn't realise we'd been here for so long and we don't have enough cash on us for all three of us to take a taxi home."
You sigh, throwing aside your blanket and rubbing your eyes in despair. "Fine. Okay. Send me your location. I'll be right there."
Kevin sighs in relief, uttering a few thank yous before pinging your phone with the address. "You're an angel, see you soon."
Silently cursing him, you change into jeans, too lazy to change the other half of your pajamas and hoping no one will notice. If the taxi driver does, he doesn't say anything, which you are thankful for.
Sangyeon's sitting on a low wall when you arrive, his feet dangling mere centimeters from the ground. He snaps his head up at the sound of a car door slamming, and you can see his smile widen when he realises it's you. "Heeeeey, what are you doing here?" he asks, half in surprise, half in earnest.
"I'm here to drive you home, you idiot," you reply, looking around to see if you can spot the other boys. "Hand me your keys."
Sangyeon complies without protest. "I wasn't planning on drinking this much," he explains, apologetic. "I'm sorry Kevin woke you up for this."
The looks he gives you makes you want to hide—in it, the knowledge and understanding of a friend who knows something he shouldn't: that you have been crushing on Kevin Moon for months, and the only reason you're out here is because he called. "It's okay," you lie, "I couldn't sleep anyway."
"Sure," he grins, hopping off the wall. He's about to say something else when he gets cut off by a loud voice.
"You're here!!"
Sunwoo appears out of nowhere, swinging an arm around your neck, his full weight leaning into you as he presses a kiss to your cheek. "Our saviour!"
You bite back a chuckle, the smell of booze hitting your nose as he continues to hug you tight. "I hope you're still this chipper with a banger of a headache in the morning, my friend," you say, patting his hair. He flashes you a smile in return.
"I'll make sure to leave some aspirin and a gallon of water next to his bedside." Kevin's voice seems to come out of nowhere, his breath hitting the back of your neck as he leans in to press a kiss to your cheek from behind. He backs away, hands dug deep into the pockets of his jacket. "Thanks for coming." His smile is warm, and your skin tingles where it met his lips.
The drive home is rather silent—Sunwoo's drunk enthusiasm faded into a slumber, his head lulling back and forth, and jerking back up every time you hit a pothole. Sangyeon's seated next to him, pillowing his head with his hand as he tries to snap an impossible picture of the youngest in the dark (for future blackmail, no doubt).
That leaves Kevin in the passenger seat, and he couldn't be paying less attention to you if he tried. His phone is on a constant buzz, and you wonder more than once who would be up at this hour texting him. You bite your lip in an attempt to subdue the idea of Kevin night texting with someone (that is not you) and it takes a long moment for you to realise he's said your name. Thrice now.
"Are you okay?" He asks as you refocus on the present, and you nod. "You sure? Want me to drive? I never should've called you in the dead of night," he starts, sounding genuinely apologetic. "I know you have a hard time sleeping as it is." The fact that he knows this should surprise you, but you're more surprised by his offer to take the wheel.
"Drunk driving isn't cute," you snap, harsher than you meant it to.
"I-," Kevin swallows, his phone in his lap buzzing again. He pauses, eyes trained on you now—on the way your jaw just clenched, and your fingers tightened around the steering wheel. His heart stammers in his chest when, "I'm not drunk. I pretended to be so I could see you."
The moment the words leave his lips, he realises how bad it sounds. But he also realises he'd rather you think him being an asshole than being an irresponsibility drunk. He watches your lips part, tentatively, and he knows you're trying to decipher if it's the truth or just the booze lying to you.
Your heart is pounding so loud you can hear the blood rushing in your ears. "Don't be a dick," you manage, pulling up the driveway of the boys' apartment. "You're not flirting your way out of this one."
"Uh, yeah dude," Sangyeon speaks up in the backseat. "Dick move, considering."
Kevin shoots Sangyeon a glance, and it seems to be enough to get the elder to gather Sunwoo and make his way out of the car, fast.
You unbuckle to help him—the idea of being alone with Kevin in such close proximity suddenly a little too uncomfortable for you. Kevin sucks in a breath, bracing himself before blurting, "Go out with me."
One foot out the car, you freeze. "I've liked you for months," he continues before he chickens out, and somehow the words keep coming now, unable to stop, "and I've been too scared to tell you so I've been making stupid excuses to see you and I know it's crazy and maybe a little unhinged but I like you, like a whole lot and Jacob's been threatening to block my number if I didn't tell you so would you please let me take you on a date?"
The look you give him is unreadable. Is it worry? Disbelief? Pity? Oh no, it's pity, isn't it? Oh shit, he fucked up.
The silence that follows feels eternal—imaginary seconds ticking away heavily in his mind like an old grandfather's clock in slow motion.
"Okay."
Okay?
"Okay," he echoes, and he notices a smile tugging at your lips. "Okay. Tomorrow. Does brunch work for you?"
"Brunch always works for me."
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Text
THE BOYZ ONE-SHOT SMUT TRICK VERSION. TRICK 8 KEVIN - MAKE SURE YOU SMELL GOOD
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WARNING: DETAILED SMUT SCENES AND FOUL LANGUAGE AHEAD!
"Kevin I think one of your tricks is the easiest," Changmin said and Kevin laughed.
"For making a fan contest for my trick is easy and I already had an idea," Kevin said.
“What’s your fan contest for your trick?” Changmin asked.
"Well, they should film like a perfume commercial ad and I will choose the best video," Kevin said and smiled at Changmin.
“Wow! I bet all the fans will surely show how good they are in filming like in a commercial ad. Good luck Kevin!” Changmin said and smiled at him.
" Thanks, Changmin! I will get going and probably the fans are waiting for my turn for the fan contest." Kevin said and smiled back at Changmin. Then he announces the fan contest where the fans should send a video that was like a perfume commercial ad. Then Y/N saw the fan contest of Kevin and…
“His fan contest really fits me since I am a perfume lover and I will definitely prepare for this.” Y/N said. Then her friend named Jiye went to her house and…
“Wow! Whenever I come to your house, I feel like that it has various vibes here because of the scent that is lingering here. What are you doing?” Jiye asked.
“I am doing a perfume commercial ad for Kevin’s fan contest because his trick is, make sure you smell good and he wants us to do like a commercial ad.” Y/N said.
“Oh! He will definitely choose you and if he had the chance to come here in your house I bet he will be lured by you.” Jiye said and smirked at her.
“Lured? What do you mean?” Y/N said.
"Y/N don't be so innocent and you know sometimes men are lured by just smelling women with their perfume but of course it depends on what perfume you put on," Jiye said and winked at her.
“Well, I don’t know let’s just see if I will win Kevin’s fan contest.” Y/N said.
"Good luck with your perfume commercial ad," Jiye said and Y/N nodded and smiled at her. Then Y/N proceeds to capture a video of her commercial ad and she used much perfume that she had on her room. Then after a few minutes of capturing and editing the video, she decided to sent the video.
"Gosh! I hope he will choose and I had so much effort in the video." Y/N said and calmed herself down as she waited for the announcement of the lucky fan. As for Kevin, he is watching all the videos of his fans. Then when he watched one of the fans' videos…
"Wow! This fan really loves perfumes and her perfumes are expensive too. Also, her video is really like a commercial ad and she can be a real endorser of a perfume brand. I like it!" Kevin said. Then suddenly Changmin went to Kevin and…
“How’s your fan contest going?” Changmin asked.
“The fans are really good at preparing for my fan contest especially the one who I chose. I can really tell she is a perfume lover.” Kevin said and showed the video to Changmin and…
“Oh! Is she a commercial model? Also, it seems she is rich too and she has those expensive perfumes too.” Changmin said.
“You’re right! I think she should be a perfume brand endorser and definitely many will accept her when they see this video.” Kevin said.
“I agree with you! I bet when you go to her place tomorrow you will smell her scent immediately.” Changmin said and Kevin laughed.
"I think so Changmin! I will go and see it tomorrow." Kevin said. Then he suddenly thought of how can he announce the lucky fan but he decided to just capture a screenshot photo of the perfume that was used by the fan but he decided to cover what perfume brand it is and he posted the photo and has a message on it
"I bet all of you are curious who used this perfume in the photo, right? I can say that her video can be a real commercial ad for a perfume brand and it was great content. Congrats to her and you will definitely meet me tomorrow!
Then Y/N checked the perfume she used for the video and…
"I had similar perfume in the photo. OMG! I might be the lucky fan!" Y/N said and smiled widely at herself but then she suddenly thought.
"Wait! What if another fan used that perfume in their video? I shouldn't assume things quickly and I should just wait for tomorrow." Y/N said to herself. Then the next day, Y/N is a heavy sleeper and it was almost time for lunch but suddenly someone rang the doorbell.
“Gosh! I am having a good sleep and someone is interrupting it.” Y/N said and she fixed herself and as she opened the door…
“OMG! Kevin of The Boyz is here right now! But I am not prepared!” Y/N thought as her eyes went big and gulped then Kevin laughed at her reaction.
“So cute! You’re Y/N, right? “ Kevin said and smiled at her.
“Yes, I am! “ Y/N said and smiled back at him. Then Kevin went inside her house and…
"Hmmm… coming into your house is really inviting because it really smells good," Kevin said as he still smelling and feeling the perfume lingering in her house and Y/N smiled at his words.
"Umm… To be honest, I just woke up when you rang the doorbell. I have to go shower first. Is that alright? It will be just quick." Y/N said.
“It’s ok! I understand. But I am sorry I interrupt your sleep.” Kevin said.
“No need to be sorry. I am really just a heavy sleeper. I really have to shower so, that I can talk to you.” Y/N said and smiled at Kevin.
“Ok! I will wait for you!” Kevin said and winked at her and she blushed again. Then as Y/N went to shower, Kevin is checking out her house and he was curious where is Y/N’s room then he went inside in one of the rooms and…
"Wow! She has many perfume collections!" Kevin said and he carefully smelling each perfume in her room. He didn't know that Y/N was already finished and…
"Where is Kevin? He is just in the living room when I left him. That's weird." Y/N thought and she decided to go to her room and when Y/N was about to enter the room, Kevin hide himself somewhere in the room.
"Wait! Why I am hiding? Oh well! I will just think she might get mad at me if she saw me here." Kevin thought. Then as Y/N went inside her room, she is only with a towel on her, and Kevin was shocked and…
“This is a bad idea! I should have just shown up myself !" Kevin said and tried to calm himself down.
"I wonder where Kevin is?" Y/N said and sighed but when she decided to put on perfume on her and Kevin suddenly smelled the perfume she put on and as he continued to smell and feel it…
“The perfume is really strong and it’s also tempting too. It looks like Y/N is doing this on purpose luring me like that.” Kevin thought and he decided to show himself to her quietly and went to back hug her and Y/N was shocked while she was still in a towel and she blushed…
“Are you doing this on purpose Y/N?” Kevin said in a sexy voice and Y/N gulped.
"Kevin you scared me and what are you doing here in my room?" Y/N said and blushed while Kevin is still back hugging her and still smelling her like he was a wolf and his breath in her neck making her shiver and…
“That’s not the answer Y/N! I am asking you if you are doing this on purpose? Also, your perfume is really tempting and luring me so much.” Kevin said and he suddenly licks her neck and…
“N-no Kevin, I am not doing it on purpose.” Y/N said as she stuttered answering him because of his previous action.
"Are you sure about that?" Kevin said and Y/N nodded. Then he decided to turn Y/N around to face him and Y/N saw his eyes were on fire and lust.
“My gosh! It seems Jiye is right! Good luck to me!” Y/N thought and her thoughts were cut-off when he holds her head and kissed her hungrily that made her eyes go big again but she just responded to his kiss and while they are still kissing, one of Kevin’s hand went to her towel and removes it and he slowly lays her in the bed as he went to her neck he licks and bites it and make some hickeys on it and he also licks and kisses her jawline that made Y/N moan his name softly. Then he stopped at his actions and Y/N helped him removed his clothes and…
“You want this too huh? That’s my girl!” Kevin said and smirked at her and she just blushed at his words. Then he decided to dive in her breast and licks the middle part of it and captures one of her nipples in his mouth.
“Ugh! Ah! Kevin! Ah!” Y/N moaned. Then he continued to suck her nipples that made her moan more and she pushed his head more in her breast and he smirked at her actions. Then he suddenly inserted two fingers to her pussy and…
“SHIT! KEVIN! AH! UGH! AH! MORE PLEASE!” Y/N moaned and he pumped his fingers to her at a fast pace.
“YES! KEVIN! SHIT! LIKE THAT!” Y/N moaned and Kevin was looking at her and smirked at her.
"Moan my name like that Y/N! I will give you more later." Kevin whispered to her and bites her earlobe and she moaned more and gripped his arms than without a warning she cums in his fingers and as he pulled out, he licked his fingers as he looked at Y/N in a sexy way and he put a condom
“Shit! he is hot when he is like that!” Y/N thought and…
“Prepare yourself for me Y/N! I love you!” Kevin said.
“I love you too Kevin!” Y/N said then he slowly inserted his cock to her and…
“SHIT! I-IT HURTS KEVIN! FUCK! UGH!” Y/N said and Kevin kissed her tears away and…
"Don't worry Y/N it will be pleasurable for you later," Kevin said and Y/N trusted him as Kevin let her adjusted first to him. Then in a few minutes, Y/N suddenly buck her hips up to him and Kevin moaned at her actions and…
“KEVIN! FASTER! UGH! AH! AH!” Y/N moaned then Kevin obeyed her and thrust his cock to her at a fast pace.
“SHIT! SO TIGHT Y/N! UGH! AH! YES!” Kevin moaned and he kissed again her neck while he still thrusting to her.
“FUCK! UGH! AH! KEVIN MORE! SHIT! AH!” Y/N moaned and her hands went to his back then Kevin went harder to her.
“SHIT! FEELS SO AMAZING INSIDE OF YOU Y/N! UGH! AH! YES!” Kevin moaned.
"YES LIKE THAT! KEVIN! FUCK! SHIT!" Y/N moaned and her nails scratch Kevin's back because of the intense pleasure she felt and that made Kevin moaned more. Then Kevin decided to go harder and rougher than ever to her.
“SHIT! RIGHT THERE KEVIN! YES! FUCK! AH!” Y/N screamed as Kevin hit her g-spot many times and she arched her back that made their chests touch to each other.
"UGH! FUCK! I CAN'T GET ENOUGH OF YOU Y/N! AH! YES!" Kevin moaned and he leaned into her neck then while he is still thrusting to her he whispered dirty things to her that made her arousal high.
“KEVIN! I WILL CUM! AH! UGH! SHIT! FUCK!” Y/N moaned.
“WAIT FOR ME Y/N! SHIT! UGH! AH!” Kevin moaned. Then in a few minutes, both of them screamed each other’s names as they cum. Then Kevin removed the used condom and laid beside her and looked at her.
"I think your scent will stay with me," Kevin said and winked at her and she blushed and slightly slap her bicep.
"Stop it, Kevin! You are teasing me again." Y/N said and Kevin laughed at her.
“Why? Did I say something wrong huh? Or you want round 2?” Kevin said and smirked at her.
“Kevin, you already made me tired and I think I can’t handle you for a second round. Let’s just rest ok?” Y/N said and Kevin nodded and still slightly laughing at her.
“Ok! By the way, I can tell you can definitely sign up in a perfume brand and endorse it.Your commercial ad looks like a real ad for a perfume brand," Kevin said and smiled at her.
"Oh! Thanks for the compliments, Kevin. I think I can submit the video to a perfume brand company, right?" Y/N said.
“Yup! I will support you when you are accepted as an endorser and I will buy the perfume that you will endorse.” Kevin said and winked at her.
“You’re so sweet Kevin! I love you!” Y/N said.
“I love you too so much Y/N!” Kevin said and he kissed her lips quickly and both of them went to sleep and they cuddled each other.
“I really like hugging Y/N like this especially her scent is really addictive.” Kevin thought.
 끝 THE END
Thank you for reading my one-shot smut trick version of  THE BOYZ’S KEVIN!
Stay tuned for the next member! :)
고마워요 여러분! (Thanks, Everyone!)
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yinxiong · 4 years
Text
half moon
Tumblr media
muse: kevin moon / moon hyungseo
genre: assassin x grim reaper! au, drabble
word count: 500
warnings: mentions of death
summary: the line between life and death was finer than he’d thought.
notes: not sure what this is, maybe inspired by kevin’s cover of ‘bury a friend’ and tbz ‘sword of victory’ performance. written instead of doing my paper bc i was anxious af lol
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The blade he pressed into her palm was perfectly balanced. He had admired it on several occasions, eyes catching the glint of blue metal beneath the moonlight whenever she unsheathed it for the kill. The silver azaleas engraved into the handle were stained red, looking almost alive beneath her fingers, and he couldn’t help but laugh at the irony.
“Why aren’t you scared of me?”
Hyungseo’s eyes darted to meet hers. Cold and dark, just like she had been taught. Perfected after nine, ten years. He knew, because that’s how long he’d been cleaning up after her. Quite troublesome, if he were to be honest, though it would also be a lie to say he didn’t enjoy watching her slip gracefully into the shadows every time he emerged from them. Of course, she never noticed him during the first few years. It was only until the hundredth throat she slit that his presence began to feel familiar, and by the four-hundredth he knew he was responsible for the hitch in her breath each time he materialized.
This was the first time she had given him a reason to trespass the boundary between them, however. He knew it was his fault, having appeared a second too early and distracting her before she finished the job— yet the smallest part of him was glad he finally had a chance to talk to her. Even if he didn’t dare admit it, he had become more than just intrigued by her, enough that a few rules had never seemed so easy to break.
He let his lip curl, just a bit. “Do you want me to fear you?”
Her gaze quivered. “No. It’s been a while since I met anyone who didn’t.”
“Well, I’ll have you know that I’ve seen far more fearsome things,” he replied lightly. “Best you disappear now, I still have much to do here.”
Pulling away, he turned towards the heap of bodies strewn around the otherwise empty courtyard and mentally sighed. Sometimes, he wished she wasn’t so talented at killing and leaving him with so much work to do. Being a reaper wasn’t as easy as one imagined, after all.
“Wait,” she said, cutting into his thoughts. He glanced back to see her dip into a tiny bow. “Thank you. For saving me.”
“I should hope you are,” he mumbled, “I might’ve gotten myself in trouble for doing that.”
“Sorry?”
“Nothing,” he dismissed. “You’re welcome. Now please, leave before someone threatens your life again. I’m not fond of killing people like you.”
She nodded, clutching her sword and swiftly making her way up to the roof. At the top, she paused, staring down at him with those familiar icy eyes (he wondered if they looked just as beautiful beneath sunlight as they were now). “Will I see you again?”
Black robes and hair fluttering around him in the cool night breeze, he tilted his head and offered her a smile.
“I think you know the answer to that already.”
-
fin.
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