#i also very much reflect on the player lol

[hexxter]

My player/keykid in missing link

Me personally my least favorite color is red but lore is lore and if they have to get red outfit it is this what it is.

Some headcanon stuff for the outfit choice -

..They have the same lore as player just adding some juice in and there cause design wise there is nothing canonically mentioned ^^

Cause authority figures encouraging the keyblade war they subconsciously anti authority in any way but also can understand when it’s reasonable (still get the anti itching though).

Nept insisted them to change clothes = get them annoyed and they want to do the opposite of what they were told to. But they also can’t really say no to the people who took them in so they just wear the uniform jacket on over the clothes they already have.

The hair hoop was item they got later on making it themselves cause its felt like something that could help with their memories (which is an item that they had in their khux design that live in my head rent free, they got it cause its spiky to avoid head pats).

Symbol in the shirt is heart and wing, to reference their magic wings they would almost always use in their first life. They probably can have them again but they can’t remember right now.

Spark “birth mark” on their face they got from their heart reincarnation.

They still didn’t figure out they can change their appearance by will, or they would probably wake up with different hair every day just to mess with people.

[f1daydreamers]

𝐁𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐁𝐚𝐫𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐫𝐬 [𝐓𝐀𝟔𝟔] 𝐏𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝟏

gif credits: @trenty

Pairing: Trent Alexander-Arnold x Fem!Reader

Summary: Arne, in hopes to focus on his team’s mental health as much as their physical, recruits a younger but just as educated psychologist to work one-to-one with the more reserved players. Trent is one of them.

A/N: This is me writing in hopes to distract myself from that abysmal final! Just to preface that Lee Richardson is the performance psychology consultant at LFC :) Also, I feel like Trent’s quite shy so I don’t think he’d be as rude as he is in this fanfic but for this to be a kinda enemies to lovers, I upped his rude boi energy by like 100% lol

There's no age gap btw! In the UK, it's doable to become a licensed sports psychologist in 6-10 years. If it took Reader 7/8, that would place her around 25 or 26 years of age. So, both Trent and Reader are of similar ages!

Warnings: psychology but nothing too in-depth, Trent’s rude in this :D, angst, very tense energy

Word Count: 1.9k words (6 mins reading time avg)

…

You checked your watch once, twice, then three times within a mere five minutes.

The sterile office, with its minimalist decor and muted lighting, seemed to magnify your impatience. Your eyes wandered to the vacant chair opposite you, and you sighed deeply.

Trent Alexander-Arnold was now fifteen minutes late for his first appointment.

“Not the best start,” you muttered under your breath.

Jotting a quick note on a pink Post-it to purchase a digital clock for your desk, you flipped the pen and clicked it shut, placing it down with a resigned finality. The email that landed in your inbox felt almost comically timed. It was from Lee, wishing you luck on your first official day.

You’d been in and out of the training center for the past week, organising your office, which had previously served as a spare room, often only used for the odd meetings.

Boxy and unfamiliar, it was a space you intended to transform into something warmer and more inviting with time. But any attempt to distract yourself proved futile; even the mental image of your office becoming a cozy haven couldn’t quell the unrest you felt inside.

Trent’s absence was more than a minor inconvenience; it felt like a deliberate message. After what Lee had disclosed about his rather aloof attitude, you couldn’t say you were entirely surprised.

Locking your office behind you, you ventured into the heart of the training facility. As you passed by groups of players and staff, your shoulders tensed imperceptibly. You adjusted your pace, trying to find a balance between caution and confidence.

Every corner turned, every nod exchanged with passing colleagues, felt like a small test of acceptance. Your mind raced with thoughts of proving yourself here. While a flicker of self-doubt danced across your features, you masked it beneath a veneer of professional composure.

You eventually found Trent tucked away in the far corner of a sparsely populated gym. A few exchanged ‘good mornings’ and ‘hellos’ momentarily eased your stress, but your tension returned as your gaze settled again on the man who had been purposefully late.

With a deep breath, you started heading towards him, weaving your way through the labyrinth of gym equipment.

You skirted around the treadmills, their rhythmic thudding echoing your own anxious heartbeat. Passing by the clanking weights, you dodged a few stray dumbbells left on the floor. The aroma of rubber mats and iron filled the air.

Finally, you rounded the weightlifting machines and found Trent on a mat, engrossed in his exercises. His headphones were still firmly in place, and his expression remained inscrutably focused, as though he was blocking out the world around him.

When you finally reached him, you hesitated, wanting to wait until he finished his set so as not to disturb his workout.

However, Trent spotted your reflection in the mirror in front of him as he came up. He stopped mid-crunch, the beads of sweat glistening on his forehead. He looked down, knowing exactly what this would be in regard of. He’d seen you around the training grounds enough to be familiar.

His elbows rested on his knees as his arms folded inward. He exhaled deeply, trying to regulate his breathing.

He wiped the tip of his nose with the pad of his thumb, then pulled his headphones off and let them rest around his neck.

“What?” He looked at you with mild irritation, craning his neck to see you standing just a few steps behind him.

Your lips pressed together in a courteous and tight-lipped smile.

“Hi, Trent. I’m Y/N, the new psychologist. We had an appointment scheduled for twenty minutes ago.”

Turning back to face the mirror, he stretched his arms out in front of him before reaching for a hand towel to wipe the sweat from his brow and neck.

Then he shrugged, his indifference palpable.

“Yeah, I know.” Your eyebrows furrowed at his response as you studied his expression in the mirror. His face shifted subtly, but the changes were too fleeting to decipher.

“Then why didn’t you show up?” you asked, your tone calm but firm.

"I don't see the point," he responded flatly.

In one fluid motion, he planted one palm firmly on the ground before twisting his torso and hoisting himself up with a push, turning to face you as he rose gracefully to his feet.

Your eyes locked inevitably, the proximity of his body left you no choice but to gaze up at his face, your chin tilting ever so slightly upward.

Beads of sweat glistened from his forehead, and his mouth was slightly parted as he scrutinised you from head to toe. A scoff escaped him before he turned away, sliding off some weight plates and placing them methodically beside his mat.

"I don’t need some shrink telling me how to play football," he asserted dismissively, the hints of his accent colouring his defiant tone.

You took a moment to consider your response, your gaze tracing the broad shape of his shoulders. Despite the urge to react defensively, you couldn’t shake the awareness that someone might be listening in from behind you.

You cautiously approached him, aware of the tension hanging in the air, his eyes flicking to your reflection in the mirror.

"I'm not here to tell you how to play football," you began calmly, letting the weight of your words settle between you. "I'm here to help you navigate everything off the pitch that might impact your performance on it."

"Well, thanks, but no thanks," Trent said, his voice dripping with sarcasm. "I've managed fine so far."

“Have you?” you questioned, quickly scanning the room for any prying ears, relieved to find everyone engrossed in their own routines.

Trent rose up, clutching a 15-pound weight plate between his hands.

"Because from where I stand, the club thinks you could use some support. And honestly, there's no shame in that." That was a saying your professors had instilled in you from day one.

Trent's jaw tightened, and for a moment, you thought he might ignore you. Instead, he pivoted to face you once more, his presence suddenly palpable.

"Look, I get that you're just doing your job, yeah? But don't expect me to pour my heart out to some stranger. Especially on someone else's schedule." He emphasised.

You blinked, but maintained eye contact, refusing to back down. "Fair enough. But I'm not going anywhere, Trent. Whether you like it or not, I'll keep trying to reach you."

He studied you for a moment, then shook his head slightly, leaning in just a bit closer.

"Good luck with that, psychologist."

…

"I think that's our time wrapped up, thank you so much, Conor." You hoisted yourself up with the armrests of your chair and gave a warm smile to the man opposite you.

"Yeah, no worries. I'll see you around." Conor said as he turned, rounding the chair he was just sitting on, giving you a final nod and smile before leaving and closing the door behind him.

You waited until it clicked shut before you sinked into your chair again. Your work was deeply important to you, one of few things in life you were immensely passionate about, but man, it took its toll on longer days.

You rubbed your temples in a poor attempt to alleviate the dull ache that had formed from hours of conversation. As you tried to gather your thoughts, the interruption in the form of a new email snapped you back to reality.

It was from Lee, asking you to come and see him when you were free.

Your head rolled back for a brief moment of respite. Trent had been on your mind ever since your confrontation earlier, lingering in the back of your thoughts throughout the day, despite the overall improvement as the hours ticked by.

Resigning yourself to more work, you pushed yourself up with a temporary surge of motivation. Straightening your blouse and combing your hair with your fingers, you headed towards Lee's office across the hall.

The door stood ajar, a silver name plaque bearing his name neatly affixed. Lee's office exuded an air of scholarly authority, with shelves lined with books, framed certificates adorning the walls, and strategically placed pieces of Liverpool memorabilia.

He glanced up from his desk as you knocked on the doorframe.

"You asked to see me?" you inquired, your head tilting slightly as he closed the folder he was reading, sliding it into the filing cabinet behind him.

"Yes, come in," Lee replied, gesturing toward the chair positioned across from him.

You smoothed down your skirt as you settled into the chair, intertwining your hands on your lap.

His demeanor exuded encouragement, warmth evident in the gentle lines of his smile. As he gathered his thoughts, your eyes fell upon a framed picture on his desk. Lee stood on the far left, flanked by several players including Trent and Curtis, their bright smiles frozen in time.

Your own smile deepened at the sight, noting how much younger they all appeared in the photograph. But as today's events replayed in your mind, your gaze momentarily lowered before returning to meet Lee's.

"A few years ago, that one," he pointed briskly at the photo, though he didn't give you time to respond before changing the topic - a relief, in your opinion.

"So," Lee clasped his hands together, "first official day? How'd it go?"

Pushing back thoughts of Trent deliberately, today had gone rather well.

"Good, honestly. Wataru and Conor were a little shy at first, but I think I was able to break through by the end of our sessions. Curtis was quite bubbly and a joy to talk to. We had some positive discussions too." You truthfully answered, giving a polite smile to round off your answer.

He nodded, impressed. Without a word, he turned to squint at his computer screen, his glasses perched atop his head. "And Trent?"

You cleared your throat, your tongue swiping over your bottom lip nervously. After a moment's hesitation, you shook your head once before answering.

"Trent didn't show up." You admitted with a wry smile. "I found him in the gym and brought it up but I wouldn't say that was a positive discussion."

Lee chuckled softly, his voice carrying a gentleness that belied his words. "Trent’s a tough nut. He’s got a lot on his shoulders and doesn't easily trust new people. But that's why you're here."

You nodded resolutely. "Absolutely. I don't intend on letting up."

"If you want me to step in-" He began but you shook your head again, halting him in the middle of his sentence.

"I respectfully don't think that's going to help. He's not exactly trusting of me right now, and I'm worried about the impression you stepping in might leave. I'm fortunate he's at least talking to me and sharing his feelings." You said with a measured tone, your words careful and tinged with a hint of apprehension.

"Well, you're the pro," you smiled at his joke, exhaling a sigh.

"I'm relying on your guidance, Lee. I can only hope he'll start working with me."

Lee nodded thoughtfully. "Trent respects effort and authenticity. He's introverted, sure, but once he's comfortable, he's a lovely lad."

"I'm sure," you blinked, fiddling nervously with your fingers.

Once he's comfortable.

That shouldn't take too long, you lied to yourself.

...

Part 2

Masterlist

Comment below if you want to be part of the taglist! Once you are part of it, you'll be reminded for every part of the series until its completion!

[calp0sa]

Favorite Headcanons for airy?

i have like 10 million headcanons for him but i’ll list as many as i can from the top of my head

-hes autistic LIKE ME!!! and is specifically very autistic about music (like meee) i like to think he had a huge collection of vinyls cds cassettes etc and its all stuff from the 60s to the early 90s. no doubt he had a bunch of posters for his favorite bands and musicians too. and hes awesome on the guitar, great rhythm guitarist… its a shame he couldn’t make his talent a profession like he once dreamed of doing. oh well, at least the number 1 perk of trucking is that its peaceful and you dont really have to interact with many people! plus trucks have radios, and cd players, so airy would often bring along a few albums to listen to as he drove those long days and nights.

-hes also got a knack for aquatic creatures (LIKE ME) of course, being a literal fish monster himself (cool fact my airy design is like actually a fish monster he can breathe underwater and everything and his limbs are covered in fish scales) airy loves fish both as friends and food. hes particularly fond of freshwater fish, which makes sense considering the fact he grew up around the swamps of louisiana (yes im making him louisianan Like Me shaddap) hes also fond of those fucked up looking deep sea creatures, just so fascinating. i think airy liked to do a little fishing in his spare time. And hes awesome at cooking em but fair warning for those with a low spice tolerance… he loves spicy food btw (like meeeee)

-when airy was in the forest, he kept a log of his thoughts on the computer, in an attempt to hopefully give himself whatever clarity he could. the notes ranged from all brief, to desperate, to hopeless, to spiraling, to borderline dadaist poetry? to insanity, to denial, to whatever, really i think his mind was obviously all over the place on a daily basis. things must have been pretty loud for him, that cassette player was probably one of the only things keeping him together, before he numbed himself n all, which is around the time he ceased writing these notes as he saw no point in doing so.

-ok enough about him suffering we’ll get back to that later Airy’s favorite drink is ginger ale i mean look at that guy and tell me he doesnt fw ginger ale or dr pepper are you kidding me. he can have dr pepper as a little treat (too much soda is bad for anyone especially if youre an old feller like airy) speaking of little treats i like to think he has an insatiable sweet tooth LIKE MEEEE and his favorite treaaats are pumpkin pie, macarons and practically anything chocolate he loves chocolate (im like allergic to not projecting onto my favorite characters if you couldnt tell) maybe airy knows how to bake a little bit i mean he is an object show host after all

-this is oddly specific but airy is a chronic pain warrior #JUSTLIKEME so when he was in the forest he’d make like home made heating pads by wetting a glob of moss and putting it against his face while he had his flame on (he sometimes put it on a plank over a bonfire if he felt like it) this was a bit tricky when he broke his face but im sure he managed he always manages (kinda) (relatively speaking)

-well anyway we’re back to the forest and i just mentioned his broken face So you know how he disappeared for seven months after he did that lol well what if it was because the pain and shock from that incident evoked the long lost clarity he’d been so stubbornly avoiding in order to cling on to his meaningless, fallacious escapism which triggered him and sent him into a state of agonizing self consciousness, reminding him of his earthly death, how he used to be Someone, and how he essentially let himself rot into what is now an empty shell of who he once was. after so many years, the first reflection he saw of himself was seen in something broken; shards of glass, of which he couldn’t stand to look at… as there is nothing comparable to the pain of revelation, the burden of truth after having been so lost and festered into the stagnant waters that surround you. he felt he had no choice, he disposed of the shards into the nearby stream. those seven months were not just a matter of physically healing, but as a means to losing himself all over again.

-Aaaanyway i think airy had a cat at some point in his life i think we can all agree hes a cat person right!!! he had a tortoiseshell kitty named goose and he loved her very much. idk why he named her goose he probably just thought it was funny to name an animal after a different animal.

-OH YEAH lemme bring amelia into this listen i am such a huge fan of the theory of airy being related to amelia so i like to think hes her uncle!! when amelia was little she’d stay over at airy’s house while her parents were away and he’d teach her stuff like how to fish, how to ward off snakes, how to kayak, all that jazz cuz he was an awesome uncle. she was kinda like an actual daughter to him. and amelia was so fond of sunny weather as a child, one dayy at airy’s house she had to stay inside because it was too rainy, so she occupied herself by drawing a little picture of the way she wished earth was; always sunny, sky always blue, grass always green, huh! the way she drew that grass as individual little triangles is all too familiar is it not…

OK I HAVE SOMEWHERE 2 GO now i’ll probablt add more later But thank u so much for asking this i love love love infodumping about anything airy related i heart airy

[thedomesticanthropologist]

Would you be willing to do an analysis on Karlach and how she seems to compartmentalize a lot of extreme feelings? Like she gives me the sense that that was how she coped in Avernus to stay alive and reduce the odds of exploitation by devils, but it's fascinating to see how fast she seems to shut down anything negative to the point that she disapproves of Tav/Durge questioning the ethics of using soul coins.

I haven't done the Karlach origin, so I may be missing some context or information. That being said LETS GOOOO 👏👏👏

Karlach has a reputation in fandom for being a cinnamon roll, but she is so much more than that. Her personality is really complex, and her history is full of decisions and actions that reflect her upbringing and the situations she was forced to survive. That history helped shape how she sees and responds to the world around her.

On Soul Coins: Soul Coins are small, coin-shaped objects forged of infernal iron into which a single mortal soul has been bound. They are used as currency in the Nine Hells, and can be used to power infernal engines such as the one in Karlach's chest

They contain an entire MORTAL SOUL. The full essence of a person, and once used in Karlachs engine, that persons soul is destroyed in a way that makes it irretrievable.

What does this mean? Can souls in coins be saved? Yes! From the forgotten realms wiki:

It was possible to release the soul within a soul coin. This could be achieved by casting an anti-curse spell, such as remove curse, on the coin. Once a soul was freed, the coin began rusting and was eventually destroyed. If the soul was of a good alignment, they were transported to the realm of their deity. If the soul was of an evil alignment, they were transported to the Styx and transformed into a lemure (dang yo lol)

Karlach sees the coins as a tool to enhance her power. If the player reminds her that soul is a person, she gets very angry and says she /knows/ that. She still believes that they should be used to juice her up. You can obtain quite a bit of disapproval from Karlach by questioning the use of the soul coins in Act 1.

Additionally, Karlach has unique dialogue with Mattis the tiefling child in the Last Light Inn. She essentially encourages the kids racket scheme, and if the player pipes up to say her advice isn't moral/ethical/a good suggestion, she has a strong disapproval and puts the PC in their place by saying you have NO RIGHT to intervene on her opinions of how a (poor, displaced) tiefling child should act to better their personal situation.

We are also aware that in her past, At some point Karlach lived in the city of Baldur's Gate in Faerûn, where she worked as personal bodyguard for Lord Enver Gortash. Personal bodyguard is key: this implies she was at his side, whenever he did whatever he was doing at the time. It is also stated that she "would do anything for him", and was betrayed by him. Her anger with him is based on what he put her through, and I do not believe she expresses anything about what he had her do while she was a bodyguard.

Karlach is not a "morally pure: character prior to Avernus, nor was she one during her time in Avernus, nor is she one when she escapes. The game never implies that she is.

However! What Karlach is is extremely loyal, and a SURVIVOR. She has the mentality of 'do what you need to do to survive', and she WILL do what she needs to do to survive. She came from a poor upbringing, she did the best she could with what she had, and now that she's escaped Avernus she wants to CELEBRATE and experience as much joy as possible before she burns up.

This makes her very sensitive to anything that might 'kill the vibe'. She doesn't want to face things like her impending death (she tries very hard to get you to stop talking about it) she doesn't want to question the coins, she doesn't want to deal with big moral questions when the bare bones of the situation are that that kid probably needs to be a thief in order to make it by, "morals" be damned.

Karlach went through hell. Literally. She was incredibly abused psychologically and physically and used as a weapon. She doesn't have the TIME to do anything other than be glad that she's not there anymore. She wants to smell the grass, drink the ale, laugh, love, make friends, enjoy as much as she can while she can. Is she a good person? I'd say so, yeah. But is she a paragon of virtue? No. She was never meant to be, nor was she ever given the opportunity to be.

She knows that reality is a lot harder and a lot more in your face than any higher 'ideals' that may be the best looking on paper. This may be an unpopular opinion as well, but I think if Gortash hadn't sold her, she very likely would have ended up on a path where she would happily do some pretty sketchy shit.

I'm not sure I'd say she compartmentalizes so much as actively chooses to avoid addressing things, to the point where it pisses her off if you try to push her. It's an avoidance of choice, maybe even a rationalization situation.

You do the best you can with the hand you're given. She always did. And now she's only got a few minutes left to enjoy what time she has, so... she does.

[sunderedazem]

okay so, I finally finished Dawntrail, patch quests notwithstanding of course! And now I have some thoughts, though they're probably kind of disjointed? Because- I have a lot of opinions on this expac, and some of the dismissive attitudes of other people I've seen floating around are just. Really annoying to me. Anyway. It's under a readmore, Dawntrail spoilys abound, I am talking about the WHOLE thing but rambling

So! I liked Dawntrail better than A Realm Reborn, (which I think is the accurate measuring stick/expac to contrast it against). It's very clearly setting up future expansions and story, introducing new characters and plot devices and generally giving us something to pursue in the future. The world is fun and beautiful, the music SLAPS, the characters are mostly well rounded, especially Wuk Lamat and Koana - their arcs were very well done and I genuinely enjoyed them far beyond anything in ARR lol. Or Stormblood, to be honest. The initial plot of about level 95 and below makes sense and is well-executed. But while I *like* it more than ARR - I think it's much less well executed in one regard - the sheer lack of tie-in to what came before.

ARR goes to great lengths to preserve pieces of 1.0's story- a story that is literally inaccessible to new players except in video or privately hosted servers and etc. Louisoix's sacrifice, though never seen outside of 1.0, is constantly referenced, even up through Endwalker! It sets up the bones of a story that is very clearly built on what came before, even though most new players will have no ability to experience that story whatsoever.

In contrast- Dawntrail has ten years of worldbuilding to sprinkle throughout, mostly in regards to previously-established global phenomena - like stories of Turali Warriors of Light with the Echo, the Umbral Calamities, the loss of an entire second moon now well over five years ago, the Final Days manifesting (surely not just over Eorzea and Ilsabard?), the Blasphemies - and it ignores all of that, to the detriment of FFXIV's worldbuilding. And look- I get it, it's a new story, the writers want to distance themselves from the previous ten years I guess, but the result is that this feels disjointed as hell to me. It's like the previous ten years of still-playable story has been completely discarded, and for what? Marketing? Like, we know the Echo wasn't just an Eorzea thing, that Warriors of Light exist across every reflection, and yet- we hear nothing about the Turali ideas and mythos about these? Not even in passing, when it would make sense for it to be discussed?

I get that some people disliked the previous story and thought the WoL thing was overdone but- it was the central story for ten years. It is central to the worldbuilding here now. Tossing it out so easily feels sloppy as hell, and it's a choice that even ARR didn't make despite how easy it would have been for them to do so!

That all being said- I didn't really have much of a problem with this during the first half of the expansion. It was the promised low-stakes vacation, Wuk Lamat had a fantastic arc showcasing her growth, the WoL kind of gets to hang out and let Someone Else deal with the plot - and it's all honestly pretty great. Yeah, I was really feeling the lack of cohesion with the previous expansions, but the worldbuilding in Tural was making up for it, with how diverse the different regions were and how cohesive everything felt within itself here was actually fantastic. (I am still mad that kitty girl never got to eat her tacos! Let Wuk Lamat eat her tacos! Taco cat!)

I also really liked that she was going to the different homes of the people she knew from Tuliyollal and learning some of their ways as well. Because she definitely knew them from her life in the city, but clearly lacked familiarity with some of their more traditional beliefs, and seeing an aspiring ruler interact with and value those parts of her communities was really well done, I think. And I think it also was a really important point to make- that to rule over (elected or otherwise) and make decisions for a people, you really have to make the effort and keep making the effort to know them.

And...and this is all where the second half falls apart, for me.

Solution Nine and Everkeep and Alexandria, and the lightning-drowned shard are really cool setting ideas, and they're gorgeous as hell, but the plot stops making sense to me here, like at all. Wuk Lamat leading the charge into the dome initially I can see, as it's a Turali village that's been swallowed up, but the moment it becomes clear that not only has thirty years passed inside the dome, but this is an entirely separate world and nation that has somehow fused with our own Source- it...I'm sorry, but it doesn't make sense for her to take the plot lead role. She's a national leader - but she's not an expert in dimensions and reflections and world ending catastrophes. The Scions are (Y'shtola or Krile are right here). The WoL is. And I definitely agree that she should have been along for the ride - these are her people, after all, at least in part! Tuliyollal was attacked by these people, she needs to be there to negotiate - and I get that the WoL as a character very, very rarely actually initiates plot, but this very much felt like we were entirely just along for the ride instead of a member of a once-again secret organization whose entire job it is to deal with shit like this and the person that literally saved the star by facing down Meteion.

This second half of the story would have been the perfect opportunity, imo, for WoL references and Ascian references and Echo references, because this is all a set of circumstances that aren't too far out of the WoL's wheelhouse of "just another Tuesday. Damn" crazy happenstances. We known the Ascians were working to unbalance the shards and maybe still are, we know that levin sickness and the sin eater transformations likely have the same cure, we KNOW that we managed to stabilize the First (and in Eden quests even helped restore it!) and could probably help Sphene do the same and- none of this is mentioned. It is literally a golden opportunity to tie in what we know from previous expansions (because this is the same overarching setting. let it have a cohesive story!) even in a momentary mention of just "oh, we've helped with something similar before, if you want our assistance."

But we don't really get that. What we get is this- kind of half-assed attempt at making Sphene and Wuk Lamat foils for each other and also friends?, and meanwhile the WoL is sitting there with the answers to at least some of the questions being asked, and just not saying anything about them. And it's very clear - at least to me - from the get go that this is going to be more learning about the Alexandrians' way of life to try and reach a common understanding (which don't get me wrong, it's fun). But even from the outset, I can tell that was never going to be the issue here. The conflict here isn't actually between the people of Alexandria and Tural, it's between Zoraal Ja/Sphene and Tural. The Alexandrians are pretty neatly stripped of any agency in this with the memory modifications of the Regulators (re: those few lines about the resistance twins' father being dragged off after a minor incident with the military and then forgotten. if that's not a guy getting Disappeared....yikes), and it's clear that most of the living people don't really know or care what Endless are.

And so when we follow Wuk Lamat around as she wanders about learning about Alexandrians, like how we did with the villages in Tural, it leaves a bad taste in my mouth. Not because we're learning about the people here, but because this is held up to be somehow relevant to defeating Zoraal Ja and Sphene - and in the end, we won't learn enough to actually understand the Alexandrian people anyway. This isn't the same thing as a princess from the capital city visiting the traditional villages of the people she's grown up alongside in order to be a better leader for them, this is two madmen (one an AI bot, the other...apparently having lost his inner motivations in the last 30 years in favor of proving himself better than his father? I dunno, I wasn't sure I understood this slide for him) using their people as a crutch to further their goals. And in between all this, we have like, four quests where we cooperate with an Alexandrian resistance, tops. And that resistance isn't even against Sphene, it's against Zoraal Ja!

But in Living Memory, we're still forced to erase the memories of (probably) hundreds of thousands of Alexandrians, with zero provision made for their preservation somehow - like would it have been impossible to record them on floppy disks or allagan tomestones somethin, or even just some of them - with zero provision made for the return of the memories of the people of Alexandria so that these simulacrum people aren't just. deleted from history. The people of Alexandria- are they ever told that they were harvesting souls from other worlds to maintain a simulation of everyone who had ever lived and died in Alexandria? Not to maintain their current lives in Everkeep? Are they ever told that Sphene was an android, that she actually died hundreds of years ago? Are the Alexandrians ever actually given the opportunity to remember their own people?

Because- not from what I understand of the current story? We get hamfisted into following Cahcuia's wishes (and she's not even Alexandrian) and shutting down the terminals wholesale (which probably condemns all the preserved and living plants in that conservatory to withering away and dying, too). And the most we get in passing is a "we will remember them" from Wuk Lamat and....no. we won't. We've barely met these people, barely comprehend their way of life. This isn't our or Wuk Lamat's culture, it's the Alexandrians. And this isn't the last plea of a dying relic (a la Emet-selch in ShB) this is- we're outsiders coming in and erasing massive chunks of a people's history. This isn't us promising to remember that they existed after they've been wiped from history, this is us actively erasing them.

And the question this particular expansion asks, via Sphene and Cahcuia and in other ways is "could you have found another way, if it were you?" and this is a question that the WoL has already answered! With Ardbert, with Meteion - but we're not allowed to give that same answer here. We're not allowed to say "yes, and here's how we helped start fixing the First and Thirteenth, do you want in." Instead, it feels like we're backtracking on one of the core themes of Endwalker (i.e. letting the memory of those you lost push you forward and keep you going - for those we have lost. for those we can yet save). Hell, G'raha's conversation with the Omicrons in Ultima Thule is all about if they can still count as living people- and then we're reneging on that here, and destroying the Endless and being told they're not living and not even given the chance to treat their memories with dignity in trying to memorialize them somehow.

Not to mention in the very end where the ruler of the neighboring country you were just at war with (you think, do you even remember or know that?) turns up having just murdered your beloved queen (who was maybe an AI, you heard, but you're not sure?) with a small boy who looks like your tyrant king from That World that just Slaughtered all your people for their souls and- you're told he's the new king now? what the fuck. and what the fuck kind of international incident-

Like, I get that the Endless needed to go, because they did. That Sphene was who Wuk Lamat was getting to know so she could be remembered (versus the Alexandrian people) even if I think that they really did not have enough time to end up as friends. I get that this is an expansion After the Other Story is Over. But the Other Story Still Happened and affected things including worldstate (and reflectionstate, lol) and it feels like that was just ignored. The memories of the people the Endless became still deserve tribute, somehow, still deserve preservation - the Alexandrians deserve to have much more agency in the decisions made about their way of life. This was still a global threat that should've probably had the Global Threat Ending Organization acting at bit more hands on about it, while Wuk Lamat did a bit more actual diplomacy.

Overall, the expansion is fun. There's a lot of fun questions I'm wondering about the answers to. Wuk Lamat is a bean, and while my WoL probably isn't calling her Lamaty'i (it took him like three expacs to be that relaxed with the Scions) he's nevertheless a friend of hers and is very willing to play pranks and cause mischief around Tuliyollal with the excuse of "yeah well I know the Dawnservants :3." The setting design and Turali internal worldbuilding is fucking incredible - honestly HW-levels of hella. The entire first half of the expansion was awesome. It's all WAY more fun than ARR, or StB in some cases. But - especially the second half - it's much less narratively cohesive with the rest of the game, and appears to backtrack on or ignore themes that really hit hard for me in Shadowbringers and Endwalker and that's frustrating to me.

I guess in the end my reaction boils down to- I got an expac with the internal worldbuilding work of HW, but with less of an explicit connection to the rest of the game than ARR had to 1.0. And as someone who's invested in the overarching story...that's last part is disappointing to me. Probably won't NG+ the second half like how I don't NG+ ARR, and I'll hope the patch quests will resolve some of the upset I felt about just. deleting giant swathes of Alexandrian history.

I definitely like the expansion, from an "is it fun?" perspective. I don't know if I like it from a "does it make sense?" perspective. And I honestly I think I would have enjoyed it more if it was all more like the first half of the expansion.

[herejusttosufferalong]

As per the anon's ask about the People Magazine and A's insta I did a lil investigative journalism and let me tell you this: it doesn't seem like the common practice to give so many redirects to the instagram profiles of the subject of their articles.

I looked up 3 random & recent "who is xyz's girlfriend" articles and also searched any other People articles about the said gfs and compared them with the ones on Luke and Antonia.

1. Cara Delevingne & Minke: 

https://people.com/who-is-minke-cara-delevingne-8668520 --- only 1 redirect to Minke’s insta

https://people.com/cara-delevingne-girlfriend-minke-second-anniversary-8659081 --- just once, gf’s

https://people.com/cara-delevingne-girlfriend-minke-second-anniversary-8659081 ---  just once, gf’s 

Also I think it’s worth noting that Cara has been a very known celeb and Minke is an artist too. So this is a celebrity couple and they’ve been together for 2 years, yet People covered them only for three times.

2. Usain Bolt & Kasi Bennett

https://people.com/who-is-kasi-bennett-usain-bolt-8385871 --- 3 to Usain’s insta, 4 to Kasi’s x, 3 to Kasi’s insta

https://people.com/parents/usain-bolt-girlfriend-welcomes-first-child-baby-girl/ --  just once, gf’s

This couple seems like they have been together for many years and gf is a known person too, but I could only find these two People articles about the gf.

3. Liam Hemsworth & Gabriella Brooks

https://people.com/who-is-gabriella-brooks-liam-hemsworth-8664644 --- 0

https://people.com/liam-hemsworth-gabriella-brooks-date-night-furiosa-a-mad-max-saga-premiere-photos-8650729 --- 0

https://people.com/liam-hemsworth-gabriella-brooks-date-night-furiosa-a-mad-max-saga-premiere-photos-8650729 --- 0

PS: There are tons of articles on this couple, because, you know, it’s Liam and I think gf is famous too. I just chose these random 3.

4. RJ Davis & Deja Kelly

https://people.com/who-is-deja-kelly-rj-davis-8620790 --- 2 times gf’s insta & 2 tiktoks

I’ve never heard of this couple but apparently they are both basketball players.

5. Luke Newton & Antonia Roumelioti

https://people.com/who-is-antonia-roumelioti-luke-newton-8663182 --- 6 times gf’s insta (lol)

https://people.com/luke-newton-packs-on-pda-with-girlfriend-antonia-roumelioti-italian-vacation-8686426 --- 1

https://people.com/bridgerton-luke-newton-holds-hands-with-rumored-girlfriend-antonia-roumelioti-8662726 --- 1

L and A have been together around a year, and it’s known to the wider public audience for about 3 months now. Yet we have 3 People articles about them.

I also checked the traffic these articles get. 

Usains’s Who is.. Article gets around 1700 organic clicks from the USA, and 700 clicks from the UK

Luke’s Who is.. Article gets around 220 clicks from the USA and around 15 from the UK

Liam’s Who is.. Article gets around 60k organic clicks from the USA and 100 from the UK. 

These are all monthly estimations.

My first reaction when I saw the latest article about A was to think it’s only natural L and her gets covered on media since his popularity has grown massively this year but looking at these insights, I realized that yes he is a lot more popular compared to before but still doesn’t get that much attraction from the general audience, outside of our small fandom.So I don’t know if those magazine/gossip platforms’ goal is to get clicks when they are putting the effort to get these articles done. Also I don’t know much about the entertainment industry and how it works so I honestly have no idea if there could be a deal in place like some people claim.

I should also note that I used a free SEO tool to check these analytics so I cannot 100% be sure that these reflect the correct data but I believe it may give us an overall idea. Please note that these kind of insight tools usually cannot promise real data, they only provide estimations. (here is the tool if you wanna check: https://app.neilpatel.com/en/traffic_analyzer/overview)

These are all just my take :)))

Wow very interesting!

Thank you for doing the leg work and sharing 💜🥃

[azsazz]

Hiii 👋 just wanted to say I adore your writing ☺️ I always get so happy when I see you’ve written something new 😁

I was curious to ask, what are some of your favourite modern AU jobs/roles for the bat boys (whether you’ve written about them or not)? Or just any ACOTAR characters?

CEO Rhys has been done a lot, but for good reason, it’s so perfect. He almost has to be effortlessly rich and/or in some position of power, like a prince, or a mafia boss.💰 I also kinda like to imagine him as a nepo baby set to take over his father’s company, but he breaks away or gets cut off, so with his very little actual job experience (as he was all set to inherit), he gets a barista job at a lil coffee shop. ☕️

Cass would definitely suit something physical, like an ice hockey player, or a firefighter, or a personal trainer. I could so see him being a gym teacher as well, imagine him coaching a kids ice hockey team. 💪🏽 He would SO volunteer to be a nude model in life drawing classes in his free time 😆 Though I hadn’t considered it before I read your stuff, I think he really fits a small town rancher too. I can so picture him in jeans, boots, and a flannel shirt, driving around in an old rusty faded red truck 👨‍🌾

Az could easily be in the FBI or something, but choosing something further away from his canon role, I seriously think he’d be an awkward computer programmer / software engineer nerd, or a twitch gamer, 👨🏻‍💻 with a secret anonymous OnlyFans or erotic audio patreon on the side. 😏 And I reckon he’d ride a motorcycle and tinker with it in his spare time, so might also enjoy working at a garage. 🏍️ I really love him in Midnight Muse, and think he suits a shy amateur artist / tattoo artist as well.

I also love the bat boy band idea I’ve seen a lot recently, where Rhys is the charismatic lead singer and guitarist, Az is the quiet songwriting bassist, and Cass is the energetic drummer. 🎶

Sorry it’s so long, I just love thinking about this stuff 😄

Hiiii!! Thank you so so much! I saw this message this morning but wanted to wait until I could give it my full attention and have my computer around, so thank you for your patience! 💙

Okay, some of my favorite AUs for the batboys? This is a wonderful question!

Rhys: Normally, I just think of Rhys as always having some sort of money/job inherited. So CEO, mafia, anything that puts him in a position of power, really, but i think it's mostly because those just reflect the books.

I do, however, love love love art school rhys. painter rhys. working at the local art supply degenerate rhys who still has wealthy parents but is trying to stick it to the man rhys. steals erasers and petty things from the art supply rhys. love him so much.

There's also something to be said about young adult rhys who's messing around with his little sister's best friend rhys. he gets me going too.

also captain of the hockey team rhys is a solid choice for him as well.

Cass: LOVE ME SOME RANCHER/COWBOY/SMALL TOWN CASSIAN. but, these are all very different. small town cass doesn't trust women, heart broken at a young age with the girl he thought was his forever. doesn't want to leave town, likes the ranch because its safe and its what he knows. cowboy cass or bull rider cassian, famous for breaking horses and backs. grumpy, gruff rancher cassian always gets me going tbh he's fucking hot as shit

i also always see him in a blue collar role like a mechanic or welder are the two i mostly attribute to him.

def something physical as well, we love hockey cass, rugby cass, wrestler (wwe lol) cass, dang i had another on my mind for sports cass but i forgot. sad. OH surfer cassian. jock type tho i can see him as. love the firefighter vibe for him too, he'd fill out the tight fire department t-shirt WELL LADIES and also volunteers for wet t-shirt contests. omg gym teach cass would be adorable as hell! oof another thought, contractor cassian ffs that would be so yummy

Az: Az i agree fits the FBI (stalker) vibes. i also like to think of him in finance or computer science too. omfg the erotic audio that's iconic and i'd def subscribe to that. hmmm what else could i see azzy doing...maybe something with music or writing...i could see him being a ghost writer of some sort and then one day his song plays on the radio and he's like hey i wrote that and literally no one believes him. something behind the scenes or where he can go unnoticed is mostly where i place him, tbh. honestly maybe even something military because he takes comfort in having a set schedule and people telling him what to do at every minute of the day. he'd fare well i think. perfect. operative because if the mission goes south and he gets captured he's not telling a soul anything.

Eris: idk why this thought came to my head but i was thinking about architecture but i think eris would be a fantastic interior designer lol. like i could see it. maybe i was just thinking about him furnishing az's new place and having a lil sparky. i could also see him as a lawyer too or something like that, something where he can be the know-it-all, smirking at them and looking down his nose at them...

Lucien: Architecture for sure. or professor. I could see him doing either of these. maybe even lawyer tbh, he would be good at that too, though i know he's immaculate at twisting stories and words so you gotta be careful of that.

Tamlin: poet? lol. professional gaslighter? jk i love tammy. maybe he installs security systems? haha just kidding just kidding. he's a tough one tho. idk why i added him but i guess also a musician but low-key soothing music, instrumental for sure...prob has a podcast where he just bullshits all day

hopefully i didn't rant for too long about this 🤭💙 this was so much fun though thank you for asking!

[p0rkbun]

SAM CARPENTER FLUFF — headcanons

⤿Pairing: Sam Carpenter x Reader

⤿Content Warning: None, just fluff, maybe cringe writing, implied kpop listener reader

⤿A/N: okay i was chatting with ai sam and these are from character ai and made me think 'hey she would do this'. It's cute headcanons, i should have did this on her bday but instead i photoshoped her with hearts and a hat LMAO. Also I didn't spell check this I'm sorry. Enjoy ♡

navigation✧

──── Sam is the type of girl to ask what your favourite music genre or artists/bands when you ride a car together the first time because she wanted some music in you two's lovely ride. When you tell her, she keeps it in mind and put it on next time.

"Aespa?" She asks, you nod as she keeps her eyes on the road "okay, aespa, i'll remember that." She smiles while nodding, repeating the name in her head.

──── You two went to the movies on your first date (cheesy i know) you picked a horror movie, she probably didn't like that bit it wasn't a slasher movie so it made her feel a bit better. When you two were watching the movie, there was a jumpscare and you flinched slightly while leaning towards Sam out of defense. She let out a small smile and would purposely offer her arm for you to grab in case you get really scared (she was probably a bit frightened too but she's being brave because she wanted you to grab her arm, she just like your touch that's all).

──── Let me tell you something, this woman radiates The Neighbourhood, especially the songs Female Robbery and Reflections. I don't know if she would listen to it but she is the personification of almost every The Neighbourhood song.

"We were too close to the stars, I never knew somebody like you"

"I see my reflection in your eyes"

"I see myself in you, baby"

(This is a heavy reference to my oc LOL)

──── Sam wouldn't be very knowledgable of video games to me, though i feel like she plays mobile games like candy crush or something. She would sometimes watch you play video games when she's passing by or sitting in the same room, she comments on what you are doing or how you are doing that and questions why you didn't shoot an enemy.

"Baby why didn't you shoot that guy? You could have taken him" She says with a confused look, watching you play valorant on the tv screen.

"Sam that's not me, I'm spectating another teammate-"

"What's that red triangle thing on the top?" "That's the spike" "the spike?" "It's a bomb" "oh...okay"

──── The time you convinced her to play, she was a little lost and asks you questions often. She gets the hang of the controlls and is actually pretty good. She would get a little mad when someone steals her kill, she rages with a frustrated sigh everytime she got killed too much. She talks back to every toxic players in the game, she was cursing at the screen and she looked absolutely pissed so you had to turn the game off before she threw the controller at tv out of anger. You don't let her play any fps game again. Not only for her sake but for your precious tv.

──── She absolutely enjoys watching you play story-based games, especially when you two play and make decisions together. She probably cried after playing tlou and life is strange. Besides that, she doesn't play video games unless you play it.

──── This woman is so protective, overprotective I say but you all know this. If you wanna go out, she's going too, she keeps a hand on your waist every time you go to public places. Definately death glares anyone who is looking at you/both of you weirdly or too long.

"You got a problem?" Sam snaps as she holds your waist protectively when she sees a guy eyeing you oddly.

──── It does get a little too much sometimes but you like her protectiveness. She gets jealous too but it's more of insecurity, you have to reassure her that you love her and no one else.

──── She likes holding you, has a hand on you all the time. She likes the feeling of you around her arms because she knows that you're protected by her. Because of that, she also takes care of you and reminds you of stuff. She asks if you eaten, drink etc. She reminds you to take a break whenever you're working too much, alternatively she brings you the food she cooked while you work on your projects. Despite this, she also loves being held and cared by you, it flutters her heart whenever you're taking care of her and cooking her favourite meals after she comes from work. She likes the sound of your heartbeat when you two cuddle and she has her head on your chest.

──── I know i said that she holds you 24/7 but when you two cuddle, she's the small spoon, whether you're short or tall.

──── She's very delicate and soft with you, like i said, she wants to protect and take care of you. She is a tough cookie but she's whipped for you. She gets a little dramatic when you get injured a teeny bit.

──── Have you seen her arms? Her beefy arms and abs are your favourite things in the world besides her. She works out often, you go to the gym with her once in a while and you really love the sight of her working out. You ended up gawking her the whole time instead of working out as well, she notices and teases you with a smirk while sweat is dripping off of her muscular body.

"You like what you see, baby? Y'know, you could have told me that you wanted to stare at me while i work out instead of pretending to wanna work out with me" She chuckles as she lifts her weights "Don't get ahead of yourself." you reply with a flushed face.

──── She doesn't show affection in public that much unless she got jealous but in private she loves kissing and showering you with love. Her kisses are soft and slow, she really is being delicate with you. Though in other occasions (*cough* intimate moments *cough*) you two make out and she practically is eating your face as she pushes down on the bed. She just loves kissing your lips, neck and shoulders. She is very much a big soft teddy bear ♡

A/N: I accidently posted this halfway OH MY GODHSJSBSJS. Sorry if there's any spelling mistakes or grammar issues, english isn't my native language 💔. Anyways, I love you and please comment your thoughts ♡♡♡♡ i might edit this constantly after i post it...

°.✧•—✦

[vanhelsing-if]

I love the demo so far! I wanted to report the stats not moving, but then I saw having them work is actually something you already have on your to-do list, so that means everything else worked fine to me!

Also, about the person who commented on the charm stat - of course the choice is yours, but I agree that it would make sense for it to be higher. Considering how old Helsing is and the fact they are still at the head of such a place and have contacts with numerous supernaturals whose trust they must gain and what not, it would make sense for them to have charm (or well, to know how to charm people and gain their trust), even if they are not the "smiling kind of person" when working. Not to mention, you said that their serious persona is something they do when they work, but that it isn't necessarily their "true" personality, depending on player choices. And the choices in-game so far did reflect that very well! But because of that, I don't think charm should be worse than the other stat. You could make it a choice though - lots of games, even if they have a MC who is generally good at what they do, allow the player to pick a strong and a weak stat. The MC being so old in this game is also a factor. Well, I already mentionned that it would make sense for them to be trained in social stuff too, but even disregarding that, I can't imagine Helsing being bad at something at this point in their life, and then during the "short" span of the game, suddenly getting very good if the player decides so. I think it makes more sense if the player decides what they are good at to begin with to avoid the impression of a very sudden change.

Of course, it's just a suggestion, but may as well share my feelings on the matter! For example, I can't even imagine Helsing NOT being good at social stuff, so no matter what this will be my character's stronger stat as soon as I can make it so.

thank you so much!!

you do make a good point! honestly i just checked and realised that i had put all the others at 50%, i thought there was a bit more variation.

i will put charm at 50% as well, and then depending on your choices from then on, it can go up or down.

stats are more for flavour text purposes than a win/fail system because they stress me out to play, let alone code lol.

i’ll write down your suggestion of being able to choose a stronger/weaker stat though, and have a look into it. thank you for the suggestion!!

[laniusbignaturals]

OBSESSED with your posts 💗💖💗🐥 do you think edward & joshua grew to be the men that they are due to their upbringing? when looking at them both, i’m reminded of leopold & loeb and how much of their wealth and sense of superiority played into the assholes they became—and why they ultimately believed they could get away with committing the perfect crime

this doesn’t make much sense sorry lol but the tldr; i’d love to read your thoughts on these two bone heads and their parents 💗

Content Warning: discussion of cult tactics, abuse, neglect, infanticide and general harm unto infants, pregnancy complications, emotional inc*st and inappropriate age gaps. This is also just a complicated read with a lot of moving parts, so be prepared for that.

No need to apologize! That’s a very astute comparison. If there’s a deviation between Leopold & Loeb and Edward & Joshua in terms of their social background, it would probably be that the former (to my knowledge) grew up in similar environments, while Edward and Joshua were raised in ostensibly very different cultures which they coalesced into one far more monstrous entity.

“Ostensibly” is carrying a lot of weight there. The Followers don’t necessarily embody these qualities, but historically, academia in the west has represented a font of organized racism and misogyny, legitimizing and promoting ideas that we nowadays look back on as cruel and ridiculous, like phrenology and such. (I fully accepted the popular hc of Edward’s family being from the ruins of USC partly for this reason, on top of the Trojans reference.) The fact that Caesar sprung from the only organized academic body in the wasteland can be taken as a continuation of that ugly tradition, and the Mormon Church’s ties to colonialism and it’s status as a modern day cult speak for themselves. Honest Hearts doesn’t engage with Mormonism critically, so the way Joshua’s upbringing in such a setting impacted him has to be inserted by us the players.

There’s a few articles you can read about the practices that make the modern day Mormon church a cult, and the impact these practices have on children raised in this environments. But some core tenants that seem relevant to Joshua’s growth are the instillment of fear and uncertainty into every aspect of one’s life, especially family and community, the hyperfocus on “cleaning” (both physically, to ensure members are always busy, and mentally/spiritually, as an exercise in paralyzing self-doubt,) and of course a tremendous amount of restriction placed on gender and sexual expression from an early age.

And this is draconian institutional abuse, not responsibility or healthy self-reflection or what have you. It’s a small wonder Joshua has something of a martyr complex when we meet him in-game: having been brought up in an environment that encouraged close surveillance over all human impulses, no matter how natural or innocuous, and never experienced a version of accountability that wasn’t a smokescreen for torture and control, all his desires need to be neatly wrapped up in diversion and justification to avoid giving credence to the idea that he’s sullied, disgusting, subhuman, unworthy of love. These themes of being taught that the loss of autonomy is virtuous/necessary so that the sufferer begins to perpetuate it themselves, and of being perpetually denied stability in spite of a seemingly endless mandate of labor, are the ones that I try to carry over into his mother’s story.

Her name is Dinah Graham, née Gardner. I work on her characterization with @dustwhirlsandrainbows. She has five co-wives.

She was very close with her mother, whose name was Madeline Gardner (née Talmage.) She, along with the rest of the community, raised Dinah to idealize a version of motherhood that revolved around obedience, self-sacrifice and participation in the colonial machine. Dinah’s mother died as a result of pregnancy complications, (as many women and children do in Quiverfull-esc religious sects,) altering but not deconstructing the way her daughter engaged with the edicts of their community.

Like her mother, Dinah got married at a very young age. She named her firstborn daughter after her mother: Joshua was her second child. She was close with her husband’s second wife Abigail, who struggled with her fertility, but by the time the third Rebecca came along her husband was beginning to be less considerate towards her, which caused contention between them. The fourth abandoned New Canaan, to be subsequently treated like she’d never existed, and the fifth wed Mr. Graham when she was a teenager. He married the sixth soon after Joshua founded The Legion, which should tell you something about the way Mr. Graham related to his children.

Joshua bonded less with his father and more with his maternal Grandfather, Dinah’s dad and Madeline’s widower. He also becomes closer with his second-to-last stepmother Elizabeth after he returns from the burning: since he left New Canaan when her children were infants, they weren’t as affected by their relation to a war criminal as his other half/step siblings. She also had personal history which made her particularly sympathetic to his plight, but that’s another post. I usually use Laura Galán of “Piggy” as a fancast for her in her youth.

Ingrid Torelli of “Late Night With The Devil” is a good representation of how I imagine Dinah in her youth, especially with the off-putting, ragdollish body language. She’s playing a 13 year old here, but the actress is 18. Dinah was in that age range when she got married to Mr. Graham, who was a couple years older than her. Saint Olga of Kyiv bears a close resemblance to her in adulthood: fittingly, since she’s the patron saint of defiance, defense and vengeance.

Wives were offered to men in New Canaan as rewards for good service to the church, and conversely, to be married to an accomplished clergyman was considered an achievement for young girls. As such, Mr. Graham was generally inattentive to the welfare of his family, and put his myriad of children and step-children into the position of constantly competing for his attention and favor, which was connected to their social life external to the household by virtue of his own status. The vastness of their family is part of the reason why Joshua always references them in such nondescript terms: he had siblings, half siblings, aunts, uncles, stepmothers and step-grandparents, etc. His children suffered as a result of the infighting, resentment and awkwardness between their mothers, and some of them came into the family with pre-existing issues which caused them to lash out at the other kids.

(For example, during Rebecca’s previous marriage, her youngest child had been a victim of infanticide by a co-wife who was going through pregnancy induced psychosis. The incident caused her then-husband, Mr.Ballard, to abandon New Canaan, opening Rebecca up to be wed again. Her two surviving children, Jobe and Ethel, were left severely traumatized, and Jobe actually pressed Joshua’s hand to a hot pan when they were both still young. He’s become less aggressive by the time Joshua returns from the Legion, but his actions are re-contextualized by Joshua’s botched execution, so. There’s that.)

Here’s a good representation of Joshua’s relationship with his daddy.

It’s also an excellent segue into talking about Edward!

So there’s a theory that the breakdown of Joshua and him’s three decade long relationship was due in part to Edward’s personality changing from his untreated brain tumor. And while that idea makes the storyline more interesting, I think the game offers a more explicit example of a shift in Edward’s neurology within his stated backstory. The implication of Caesar’s mother taking him to The Boneyard after his father’s death is that whatever home they had been living in was destroyed in the same incident. Raiders don’t attack for no reason - maybe they were landholders. The loss of that kind of generational wealth would certainly contribute to that sense of aggrieved entitlement we see Edward display so aggressively in game. Growing up in the Boneyard, he wouldn’t have any direct connection to whatever rural culture they’d previously been apart of, except that which he would get through his mother. Maybe that’s where his need to assert himself as a supreme intellect comes from: insecurity about the fact that his people were (in his mind) uncultured and uneducated.

But the transition from one setting to another is less important than the circumstances in which that transition occurred. Having a parent killed and a home destroyed, then being taken on foot to another settlement by the remaining one, would represent an extreme disruption to the established patterns of safety in which infants are supposed to exist. “Neural development occurs most rapidly in early childhood and is shaped by experience,”and reactions to trauma in small children with limited expressive & defensive capacities are markedly similar to signs of cognitive impairment in adults: symptoms like the loss of previously established movement and language skills, detachment from & disinterest in their surroundings, appearing “frozen” or sustained periods of blank staring, sleeplessness and nightmares, etc.

The sleep one is sticking with me. Insomnia can cause brain damage even in adults subjects, and babies with undeveloped brains are far more vulnerable to serious consequences from such disruptions. Consistency and routine are also important to a young child’s ability to rest: not only having it disrupted by an incident of violence, but being uprooted and taken to a new place in the immediate aftermath, could’ve severely damaged his ability to cope with the stress of that situation as it was happening, let alone in the years afterwards.

And that’s why I think going through something that would’ve been taxing & traumatizing for a grown adult as a baby with an extremely delicate brain is much more likely to have had an adverse impact on Edward’s neuroanatomy - and subsequently changed his personality for the worse on a physiological level - than a tumor that popped up when he was well into manhood. It’s difficult to ascertain, since two year old children don’t have full personalities in the first place. He essentially lives his whole life in the aftermath of that event.

These two themes - of the psychological interplaying with the physiological, and of growing up in reaction to traumatic experiences that preceded all other sense of identity - are the ones that I try to carry over into my writing for his mother. There’s also comparison & contrast made between Edward’s family and Joshua’s, my attempt to explore how people in vastly different situations can end up in similar circumstances. A key difference is that the Grahams are much more thoroughly influenced by their community and extended family, while the Sallows are more self-contained.

I call Edward’s mother Clarice. I’ve put down a frankly obscene amount of plotting, backstory, and analysis for her (and her associates,) but very little actual writing, unfortunately. Her full name is Clarice Belinda Sallow. She was born to Earl Sallow and his then girlfriend Lola on a ranch not far from the dilapidated USC campus, on October 28th of 2189, the same year the NCR was founded. A charming but emotionally unstable philanderer, Earl had several other illegitimate children by various women, but he didn’t pay any of them half the attention he paid Clarice. Clarice was Earl’s only daughter, and as such he (subconsciously) saw her birth as an opportunity to mold a woman from scratch, suited to his needs and incapable of abandoning him. Lola fled the family when Clarice was a toddler on account of Earl’s habitual adultery and intense jealousy, leaving her to be raised exclusively by her father. She spent her childhood performing the duties of a wife, tending the ranch, cooking and cleaning, washing and mending, etc.

Though Earl never SA’d his daughter, his emotional attachment to her was wildly inappropriate. He leaned on her for support, barred her from an outside education, and kept her largely isolated from other children, especially boys. He also dictated the clothes she wore, her spending habits and personal interests, and kept her on her toes with guilt trips and episodes of rage. The most aggressive of these incidents was when Clarice got her first boyfriend at the age of fourteen. When her father found out, he threatened her in extremely graphic terms which I can’t repeat on tumblr, and assaulted the kid she’d been dating.

Earl died after a grueling battle with spinal cancer in 2209, when Clarice was twenty years old. The last year of his life was painful and lonely, and he had little contact with anyone but Clarice. (This sounds cathartic on paper, but the legacy of this period is just further damage to his daughter’s mental health, so. Don’t cheer too loud.) In the aftermath of her father’s passing, Clarice was severely distraught, lacking a tangible identity after spending her formative years so devoted to one man. She fell in with Earl’s friend and neighbor, a carpenter named Frank Abendroth (nicknamed “Roth”) who managed his affairs after his death. Roth ended up abandoning his own family and bringing Clarice with him to a settlement in the north. There, he took a second mistress, an east coast transplant named Vanessa.

Roth and other businessmen in the USC area had had a handshake agreement with the local NCR which allowed them to store raw materials like lumber off the books, so they couldn’t be taxed for importing them. Roth assumed that the authorities in the north operated on the same terms. They didn’t, and he was arrested for customs fraud and sent to prison when Clarice was about twenty one. She found out she was pregnant with his child soon before, but was spared having to tell him by his arrest, and Vanessa helped her get an abortion. Together, the two girls went in search of Clarice’s oldest brother Paul, who was living in a flophouse in a semi-urban mining town. They moved in with him and quickly became enmeshed with his friend group, which included a bounty hunter, his wife, and her longtime friend, a native of the Boneyard named Roy Tillman.

(Never thought I’d get the chance to post this incredibly niche meme, but here you go.)

Leaving out some major life events for brevity (and because I might end up changing them,) Clarice eventually married Roy, and they settled on her father’s ranch before it was burned down. Theirs was a common law marriage, since Roy had already legally married someone else when he was younger, though they’d long since separated. That, (and the fact that property ownership in the wasteland is easier to prove when you share the surname of the former owner,) is why Edward has his mom’s last name.

Roy was something of a slimeball, being influenced largely by the opportunistic bastard trope and a willingness to tacitly profit off of, if not participate in, unjust systems. He spent a long time working as a moonshiner, outselling his competitors by producing cheap rotgut liquor. He met Paul when the latter was a bouncer at a dogfighting ring where he liked to gamble. His first love, the bounty hunters wife, had been a victim of labor trafficking, and Clarice also had unusually low standards as a result of her past. But whatever else Roy was, he was also markedly less dangerous and unpleasant than his male peers, causing Clarice to see him through rose tinted glasses and feel as if she owed him something. She gave birth to Edward when she was thirty five, and died of cancer around the age of fifty seven.

On that note, fun fact about the USC area: they, as a community, consumed irradiated food in huge quantities. For some families, it was all they ever ate. This practice began before the NCR was around to incentivize widespread sharecropping and educate wastelanders on the specific dangers of an irradiated diet. USC was landlocked and ecologically devastated, with the remnants of pre-war urbanization making it difficult to institute sustainable livestock farming. So eating radioactive food with every meal started out as a matter of desperation, when the area was still widely impoverished. By the time Clarice was in her teens, the practice had evolved into more of a rural masculinity ritual, the sort of habit meant to affect that one was tough and down to earth, (like beer, whiskey and meat in the South.) Earl partook, and he taught Clarice to partake, and Edward came out of Clarice.

That’s why they all get cancer.

As other people have discussed, Edward’s father’s murder at the hands of raiders and the destruction of their pastoral, patriarchally inherited land makes for excellent propaganda, and he’s used to using those events as a rhetorical tool when trying to recruit people. On an emotional level, Edward tends to look on his father with ambivalence or active disgust. To be killed in a failed attempt to defend their home, leaving his son in the care of a woman who was significantly younger and weaker than him, is a massive blow to the image of the kind of man Edward would like to believe he came from.

His relationship with his mother started out stable if not healthy, but became more fraught as he entered his teens. From the start, Clarice was deeply afraid of recreating the pseudo-incestuous bond her father had with her, especially after Roy was killed and they were left a family of two, much like she and Earl had been. Lacking positive examples of what parenting should look like, she embraced an authoritarian style of motherhood with firmly delineated parent-child roles, and had periods of neglect and abusiveness, like breaking/hitting things in rage when he was around or giving him alcohol to put him to sleep. Though these behaviors cooled as Clarice got older, and her life become more anchored, Edward resented his mother’s growing inability to (in his mind) justify her misgivings as a domestic authority by remaining a strong, imposing figure worthy of obedience. Part of the reason he accepted the assignment to the Grand Canyon was because Clarice was nearing the end of her life, and he didn’t want to be around for her demise.

Clarice’s face is square, and like her son she has a hooked nose, broad shoulders, brown eyes and blonde hair - a combination which is very difficult to find representation for when hunting for fancasts. But Olga Mironova in “Come And See” looks similar to her, as well as Leah from TLOU2, Kirsten Dunst in “Melancholia,” and Tammy Barnes from Far Cry 5. The woman in the black and white photograph is Andrei Tarkovsky’s mother. (Final image is from this gif)

[wheredidhiseyebrowsgo]

hiii, I'm so appreciative of what you do lol! I suck at finding good fics, do you have any ice skater/hockey player sterek? I'm not really very caring on how mature its going to be, I just wondered if there's any out there, thanks again! <3

I sure do!

Don't let go of me by PumpkinkQueen

(1/1 I 845 I Teen)

Christmas should be a merry time to celebrate love and affection. Unless you beloved boyfriend is an asshole. Then you do all the celebration just the same but you may get your ego and your butt bruised along the way.

First Date Skate by 4lw4ys_a_fri3nd_n3v3r_a_l0v3r

(1/1 I 2,440 I General)

“Ijustreallywantedtokissyourightthen,” Stiles muttered under his breath in a rush. Had Derek not been a werewolf, he would never have heard it and he certainly wouldn’t have been able to understand what had just been said.

Derek Hale and the Ice by Argabarg

(1/1 I 2,466 I Mature)

Derek reflects on what it would mean to be the first openly gay NHL player... Is it worth it to finally be with Stiles the way he desperately wants to?

Holding You Up by isthatbloodonhisshirt (wasterella)

(1/1 I 4,539 I General)

“This place isn’t going to last long if it doesn’t take care of its skates,” Derek said before he could help himself.

“What?” Stiles blinked at him, then looked down. He laughed. “Oh, no. These are mine.”

What?

“What?” Derek said, repeating his thought aloud.

“The skates,” Stiles clarified, motioning them, as if Derek didn’t understand.

Oh, he understood perfectly, thank you very much. Why did Stiles own skates? Why did Stiles own skates?!

His day was about to get worse, wasn’t it?

“I used to play ice hockey when I was younger. Scott and I switched to Lacrosse in high school, but I’ve always liked skating, so I got myself some skates when I was fifteen or sixteen. They’re a little tight, but they still fit well enough. Figured there was no point in paying to rent skates when I have my own.”

Derek was right. His day just got worse.

The One with the Kiss Cam by nerdfightingwhovian

(1/1 I 5,224 I Teen)

While at a hockey game, which was totally Stiles's idea, the cameramen behind the Kiss Cam think Erica and Stiles are together. Derek, right next to Stiles, has to intervene on the behalf of his mate.

Also, there might or might not be a homophobic couple who start screaming at our werewolfy hero. He also might or might not give them the cold Hale stare.

Sterek on Ice by viennalemon

(6/? I 17,135 I Explicit)

Stiles Stilinski is one of the stars of his NHL team, the Cyclones, but management isn't happy with how he is conducting himself off the ice. It becomes the Cyclone's PR manager Derek Hale's problem and now Stiles' behavior has to improve or they'll both be out of a job. This is a mashup of a Sterek AU and also fanfiction for Shameless Puckboys (Puckboys book 3) by Saxon James and Eden Finley. This is a work in progress so tags will be added as chapters are added.

Take The Ice by Hopeless ships (The_Danish_Biscuit)

(7/7 I 50,228 I Mature)

To Derek Hale hockey was everything. It was the only reason he even tolerated High School and if given a choice the only thing he would be doing for the rest of his life. Some called him driven others called him fanatic.

Derek called himself determined.

Only one day a random meeting with a strangely fascinating young ice skater turns Derek's life upside down. A odd friendship blooms between them and Derek slowly comes to realise that his life isn't quite as simple as he thought. There might be more to life than ice hockey.

Sink My Teeth Into You by groffiction

(26/? I 77,191 I Explicit)

Derek Hale is one of the sexiest Alpha’s to be in the Werewolf Olympics, held every four years. Unfortunately after this last Olympics, getting only the silver medal, his partner bails on him. In need of a partner, and being a total stubborn Sourwolf about the whole prospect, his coach and uncle, Peter Hale decides to go in search of one by himself. He finds Stiles Stilinski, an Omega who just so happens to work as a Stripper at one of the best gay bars around town and gives the boy an offer he can’t refuse. Peter figures that the mouthy exotic dancer would be good for his nephew. However, what he didn’t intend were for both of the wolves to not only start hating eachother, but to also have enough sexual tension in their ire to melt the whole planet’s ice rinks.

Two Minutes for Holding by captaintinymite (augopher)

(18/18 I 121,498 I Explicit)

There were three things college hockey players Derek Hale and Stiles Stilinski knew for certain. 1) Their lives revolved around hockey, 2) They were madly in love, and 3) Derek was so far in the closet he might never find his way out.

They'd been together for two years now, and for two years they'd been a secret with only a few people knowing about them. Yet Derek's fear kept them from moving forward: fear of his family's rejection, fear of his sexuality tanking his father's career, fear of the rampant homophobia in professional sports. The ruse was growing thin.

Something had to give.

Or: The story of how one epic NCAA Championship run and college, served as the backdrop for some of life's great hardships.

[midnight-bay-if]

I played the demo today, and so far I love it!

As expected, Taj is my favorite character so far, and it's unlikely this will change anytime soon!

But one character that has me very intrigued too and that isn't among the ROs is Hunter. I don't know what to make of him, and I feel like he isn't just a rando... Makes me curious about how important or not of a choice is agreeing ouright to the "date" or refusing first and the MC agreeing only for a lack of choice... Any hints or facts you could drop about him? Because I'm equally wary and intrigued atm!

Other than that, I had a small issue on my playthrough that may or may not be a coding error: at the crime scene, when Alek finds MC is there, if I pick the option to apologize, it directly skips to Rain stepping between Alek and MC, and I feel like something is missing there? Especially considering the other options actually elaborate on what happens / what is said.

And that aside, I was also wondering if you'd consider rephrasing a bit the segment that sets off the character customization? I know it may come off as very nitpicky, but the narration says MC looks at their reflection and sees their 7 years old self. But it bothers me a bit that it implies MC's hair didn't change length in all these years, as it's pretty common to cut or let your hair grow between the time you're a kid and the time you're an adult. I sure know I had always long hair as a kid but now I never let it grow past ear length. And since we can decide if MC dyed their hair, it would only make sense to decide what is their current hair length, I think?

Sorry if it seems TOO nitpicky - I just couldn't help but be a bit bothered by that!

I'm really glad you enjoyed the demo! It means a lot to me that anyone would consider playing and then sharing their thoughts. it's very much appreciated.

Taj is definitely fun to write, so I can see why so many people are drawn to them, too.

Hunter is definitely an interesting one, but their story will be important, so your instincts are right, haha. What are some facts about Hunter I can share without being spoilery... hmm...

Hunter enjoys it when you're combative. The angrier you get, the happier he gets.

He genuinely enjoys the MC.

He's older than he looks.

He's not from Albach Bay, and he hates it there.

He's often a contrarian, not out of any genuine belief but out of amusement.

Hopefully, this will help you gather some more thoughts on Hunter, lol.

Thank you so much for pointing out the issue you mentioned. Unfortunately, it was just the result of my awful ADHD brain. I added that choice pretty last minute because I felt the other choices weren't sincere enough for the reader who was playing as a kind MC. In the midst of editing, I added that choice, intending to go back to it and add the rest. Like a dummy, I completely forgot, haha. It's fixed now, though. Thanks!

And as for your suggestion, it isn't too nitpicky to point out what you didn't gel with, haha. When writing it, I concentrated more on players who would choose to dye their hair, having a clear distinction between that and their natural hair colour. It just made sense to group the hair customisation together at that time. However, as a compromise, perhaps I can make it clear that the reflection the MC is looking at may not be an accurate depiction of what they looked like as a child, but instead an image based on how they look now since their memories of childhood are skewed.

Let me know.

Anyway, thank you so much for sharing your thoughts :)

[magicalwarriordiamondheart]

Guide for the first 7 eps i posted from discord for helping with Chandra's run:

so the guide doesn't get specific for the first 7 eps since its a linear story, but a lot of FP gain is done in those so this is what i picked in my run

ask directly

go all out (+guts)

should tell them

mushroom pasta (doesn't matter i just tend to side w Sophie early anyways)

comfort clover

i wouldn't like that (doesn't matter but again to just keep the rest of the team high in AP lol)

apologize

defend her

hug Zacharie (only one that gives +FP iirc)

its fine but...

accept the offer (hanging w Chandra in e9 gives her AP, but hanging w the guys gave me more FP, i ended the run with 105FP in the no e9 version so its worth skipping that hangout imo)

tag along

ask Alex how Liam got his powers

follow Amy (doesn't matter i just always pick her)

don't worry

what about Liam

[entire rest of liam arc goes here. he needs to be recruited of course lol]

I also hung out with Clover and Liam during e11 and pretty much sided with Liam for the most part (the only choice that gains FP is "that wasn't his fault") and helped clover cook at the end since refusing her loses FP. then in e12 pick dare for +Guts and ask clover who she'd switch lives with for +FP. and in e13 i think "Aren't you scared?" gives one more point of AP to Chandra than the other (it's like 2 vs 3 points or something its not THAT big of a deal, and i picked the "its nothing" one in my own file) and at the very end saying "just one more thing" to set off the necklace flag

Because of this ☝🏽 I also made some changes to the point requirements.

If you don't play with her in E9, getting her to the 30 AP required was almost impossible. I never intended for her E9 to be required though, so to fix that, she only required 25 AP in exchange for the other seniors needing 50 AP. If you did hang out with her, she would require the full 30 AP and the boys would require 45 AP which was a requirement that was just too difficult to reach without following a specific play style. Prioritizing her shouldn't make it harder to unlock her lol. and I want players to be able to explore a variety of options beyond what the guides recommend while in the common route,

so I lowered the boys point requirement to 40 AP for cases where the player hangs out with Chandra in e9, which should be much more reasonable to obtain and still retain Chandra's difficulty as a character

Guide was adjusted to fix the missing choices and reflect the point adjustments.

[cementcornfield]

an unfortunately hilarious way to describe how how the bengals fumbled this deal. listen here

transcription (and some commentary) below

they tried friday night, they even tried on saturday into saturday night, and it continued into sunday morning actually. they could not bridge the gap, it just was not happening. there were numbers that they couldn’t figure out. there was a cash flow issue, there was a years issue. the APY was fine. it would have surpassed justin jefferson but everything else was not there. and basically, this is exactly what justin jefferson went through last year. justin jefferson also wanted to get extended after his third year, the vikings could not bridge the gap. they made him play out his fourth year and eventually it all worked out and he just became the highest paid receiver after playing four years. ja’marr’s gonna go through the same thing. he’s gonna play through his fourth year and eventually at this time next year he’s gonna try to get extended and he was looking for 36 million a year right now. if he has a ja’marr chase type of year right now, ja’marr will be able to ask for 40 million dollars a year next year and he’s going to get it from the bengals. thats where it is. 

again, i don’t know why some of these organizations decide to wait when you have the star players, just pay them because if you don’t it gets more expensive…i’ll tell you this much, ja’marr’s side? not happy about it. ja’marr himself? not happy about it as well. he thought the deal would get done, this has been four, maybe even five, months of negotiations and they thought they were on the doorstep a couple of times only for it to collapse, and we’ve said it a million times - the bengals do negotiations way different than every other team. they're way more annoying about it and this player experienced it for the first time and he’s not happy about it. but there’s nothing he can do about it, he’s gonna play through the year. he handled it with class and he’s onto playing week 2 where he should be fully healthy. 

Okay so! pretty revealing stuff!

the cash flow thing. upon further research, this isn't the classic "oh boohoo the brown family is too poor!" but actually more about guaranteed money. it's cash flow for the player throughout the deal. the bengals tend to only guarantee a certain amount in the first (and very rarely the second) year of the deal. ja'marr's camp wanted more guaranteed money throughout the contract (which basically ensures security throughout the whole thing rather than risk being cut at the end, and could also prevent him from wanting to hold out/in because he wouldn't be making much per game towards the end). it seems like the bengals had a limit on the money they'd guarantee throughout six years, not because they couldn't, but because they wouldn't. (they are billionaires and are more than capable of drumming up more liquid cash if they really wanted to, but they don't want to.)

one thing i DO find comforting though is that we are not the only team to fuck this up lol. justin tried for an extension last year, and they also couldn't bridge the gap, making him play his fourth year first. and it all ended happily, he is the highest paid receiver now. and next year, ja'marr will be.

but! ja'marr is NOT happy right now. which sucks! he's a pro and i know he can put it behind him and focus on the game. but it's just such a bummer. hopefully he can use this as motivation and play pissed off/with a chip on his shoulder/whatever, but still, annoying it got to this point!

the confirmation about how annoying the bengals are as an organization to deal with from every single agent. it really shouldn't be a secret after jessie, tee, etc. and it's such a poor reflection on us that we supposedly didn't pay those guys to pay ja'marr, and we couldn't even get that right (we will eventually, but they've already used up any good will they had from ja'marr's side, and are going to have to pay way more now!)

[tigreblvnc]

BLUE LOCK MATCHUP — @harusanzuchiyo

Your match is...

— Chigiri Hyoma

✦ "I like my own company or the company of those close to me, especially my big sis since she’s like my best friend." This immediately made me think of Chigiri and his sister. They share a similar bond, even if it might not be as openly expressive.

✦ "I tend to observe others and my surroundings and always catch what others feel or things people wouldn’t notice." Again, this is something you share. Chigiri is very discreet during the early episodes, always in the background and not very involved in group activities.

✦ Yet, we quickly notice his eye for detail. He’s able to explain to Isagi how his playstyle works, how he sees the entire field as a whole, and so.

✦ "I’m not really good at expressing my own feelings so most of the time people find it hard to read me." Well, it’s the same for Chigiri.

✦ "Once you know me, I’m more laid back. I’ll make jokes and laugh a lot, even at the silliest things, and definitely tease my friends sometimes. I’m also very sarcastic." Our redhead is known for becoming one of the sassiest characters on the field later on, throwing sharp remarks at opponents who can never outrun him.

✦ Even so, I don’t see him as someone who mocks others for no reason. He knows his worth and eventually regains his confidence.

✦ Outside of matches, we know he’s pretty laid-back. He goes with the flow and doesn’t hesitate to invite other players to join when Chigiri is with the Egoist 4.

✦ In general, this echoes your tendency to switch between hyperactive and vegetative modes. It reminds me a lot of Chigiri’s ability to know when to be cheeky on the field and when to be calm and composed once his jersey is off.

✦ "More than talking, though, I tend to listen, so if you had a bad day, I’ll just sit with you in silence and keep you company, or find a way to distract you. And if you eventually want to talk about it, I’m all ears." I’ve noticed that even though the overwhelming majority of characters in the manga are all about competition and victory, there always comes a moment when a character needs to slip into an introspective episode to refocus and regain their determination. Some even feel the need to talk with someone, and I think Chigiri could be that type, especially if you’re able to speak frankly when you know something’s wrong. Chigiri is the kind of person who needs to be scolded to clear his thoughts and get back on track. That’s a role you’d fill perfectly with your ability to provide moral support to those you care about.

✦ "I’m also really disorganized and clumsy, probably because I daydream most of the time (if you catch me being clumsy, I’ll probably cringe a lot). I don’t have a schedule (I’m too lazy for that), so I tend to do everything last minute T.T." That’s probably why your house is so messy! We know the two neat freaks in Blue Lock are Isagi and Barou; without them, it’s often chaotic in the Egoists' homes.

✦ At the same time, I don’t see Chigiri complaining about it much, you know. He goes with the flow, as always.

✦ The red panther has this philosophy of "as long as you don’t slip on a banana peel while walking, it’s fine!"

✦ "On the other hand, I like people who respect boundaries, open-minded people, people who don’t jump to conclusions, and people who don’t live to please others but for themselves and don’t care about others’ opinions." Honestly, this paragraph gave me the most trouble finding the best match because when it comes to respecting boundaries, let’s just say not many characters fit the bill lol.

✦ But the "don’t care about others’ opinions," you honestly couldn’t have picked a better manga to find characters who align with that definition.

✦ All in all, Chigiri is a good balance of everything you like in someone: a respectful person who knows their worth and knows how to self-reflect.

✦ "As for hobbies, I LOVE drawing, especially creating characters." Chigiri is someone who likes taking care of himself and appreciates beautiful things, so I can easily see him leaning over your drawings to see what you’re working on. Of course, if you don’t like that: he backs off simply and waits for the moment when you’re ready to show him, if that ever happens.

✦ He knows how to keep himself busy with reading and gladly recommends titles to you.

✦ "For the love language I would like to receive, I would say quality time too, as I said earlier I just like the idea of spending time with the people I care for." Honestly, I think Chigiri is one of the best at that. Just being in the same room as you, nose deep in his books, and when a passage amuses him or gets a reaction out of him, he reads it aloud to you without taking his eyes off the page.

✦ "I have shoulder-length dark brown curly hair that I tend to style a lot (thanks, Pinterest lol)." Skincare and hair routine together <3 And I think he’d be impressed by your style; it contrasts a lot with his, which is more casual chic. When you’re out in public, people definitely turn to look at you two.

A word about your match: I thought of Isagi because he could help you organize your days and tidy up for you... But I found the balance that Chigiri brings more interesting.

© TIGREBLVNC 2024 | AUGUST '24 MATCHUPS EDITION.

[kind-of-a-shitty-wizard]

hiii i got a little insane over haskills characterization in the other elder scrolls games / material. teehee rambling abt these ^ quotes under the cut (long). also im not that serious abt any of this tbh im just glad haskill appeared in any other elder scrolls material at all LOL

OKAY. okay. about these quotes. idk why other TES media does this, but in these quotes from elder scrolls legends + the interview with haskill it seems like the writers are pushing to give the impression that haskill slightly resents or is even indifferent to his position / the isles / sheogorath ?? (unless haskill is being a little bit more flippant or hyperbolic than usual...?) which is characterization that is NOT what i got from playing oblivion at all skdskdjfn

like... when i played oblivion i thought it was very clear that haskill prefers to be in the isles, serving sheogorath, more than anywhere else. (<- i think this is actually the reason he's technically "mad" even tho he seems sane outwardly. if you enjoy being among madmen it probably means you're mad yourself ykwim). i think haskill does like the isles, his ass is just reserved abt it, like he is about everything... yknow just like jeeves, whose character he's been compared to lmao:)

i think unfortunately some writers take his annoyance with the player and his slight second thoughts about sheogorath's plan in oblivion, and mistakenly assume that he's just annoyed at his whole position. haskill does have his moments of exasperation, but the thing is it's usually only exasperation and it never verges into anger or bitterness or resentment like the top quotes seem to indicate. for example, haskill says this abt his idea of you mantling sheo / the clowns debacle:

^ This quote is a good reference point for haskill's view on sheo bc its pretty much the most critical-of-sheogorath quote from oblivion i can recall, and it tells us a lot of things. in this quote he expresses some exasperation about the clown idea (because he's a prissy bitch who doesn't want to get his outfit dirty /affectionate) and shows some apprehension about one of his lord's ideas (because it involves you, and haskill doesnt like you). but these 2 points he has beef with aren't really reflective of sheo himself but of other issues - ie he doesn't directly question sheogorath. and IN THE END Haskill defers to sheo's judgement because haskill trusts him and values sheo's ideas. in all of his oblivion dialogue, this is the most critical toward sheogorath he gets, and he never outright insults or shows resentment toward him or the isles like in the above quotes bc his loyalty to sheogorath eclipses it

on the contrary (and i dont know why the writers for non-oblivion elder scrolls content dont seem to see this??), theres so much evidence that haskill actually does, you know,,, enjoy being in the isles. here are just some snippets i can think of:

"the isles are hardly a place for anyone, really" <- i BEG to differ, Haskill likes it here, he likes listening to prisoners being tortured in xedillian, he likes wearing his ridiculous frilly high collar outfit emblematic of the fashions of the isles, he doesn't care about morality and it suits him just fine that it doesn't matter here!! (the end quote might be him being a little facetious about relmyna but to be honest i wouldn't be surprised if he thought decency and morality WERE provincial notions because he certainly has no problem killing people lmao). and again, to enjoy doing these things / being around madmen probably says something abt haskill being mad himself. lol

not to mention he likes a bit of joking around. which i imagine sheo does a whole lot. when YOU rib him a little he says this:

his derision in the first bit i think indicates, "i cant believe you would joke around at a time like this," and the upturning of the "very good" i think indicates, "it was a good joke / maybe they could mantle sheo after all". he's not all dour - he appreciates a good joke, especially from (someone who's about to become) his Lord!!

and going a little deeper into haskill actually liking the isles... haskill clearly holds what sheogorath and the isles represent (chaos, free will, individuality) very highly. a good example of this is when you ask him about dyus, and he gives this snarky reply:

^ he says this with such VITRIOL its so funny :p and the amount of disdain in this line indicates (to me) a real conviction in his belief in the free will, chaos etc that sheogorath represents.

this is why i dont think this quote makes sense. "i cant remember why i put up with [sheogorath]" <- haskill wouldnt say this bc he understands fully why he puts up w sheogorath, and his own convictions in sheo that lead him to keep doing it, and even if this quote is him being hyperbolic, i dont think he'd joke about his faith in sheogorath like that because, yk, one of his characteristics is that he's extremely loyal, and moreover he never said anything to this effect in oblivion sdkjskdjs

him having a strong belief in what sheogorath / the isles represent is also evidenced by the language haskill uses when talking about sheo. whenever haskill mentions him, there is an element of poetry and respect to his words that shows that haskill thinks about him highly at the very least:

^ haskill constantly stresses sheogorath's intrinsic unknowableness and power and unique wisdom in a way that feels very respectful. saying "to attempt to fathom [sheogorath's will] is a foolish endeavor" shows that he knows there are unexplainable aspects to sheogorath that he takes note of, respects, and knowingly keeps his distance from... he gets sheogorath and reveres him (at least more than most others or the HoK). in these quotes especially, it feels a bit like hes trying to illustrate how impressive sheogorath is to the HoK, hyping up his boyfriend if you would. who said that. and combined with this respect is (i believe!!!!) a deep care. he is invested in the isles and sheo and wants to help them out of more than just duty. he gets fearful and even loses his composure at some points in the story when sheo/the isles are threatened which i think indicates that he deeply cares for them both!!:

i think this is a care that, combined with the respect he has for sheo, makes it really unlikely for him to get more than exasperated with his behavior and verge into resentfulness. i dont think anyone truly understands sheogorath, not even haskill, but haskill respects sheo as a god, and also gets him in a more familiar/personal way i think - like the way that a cat owner loves their cat but gets exasperated with it when it gets its head stuck in a tissue box. he doesn't angry or anything because he understands that it's the cat's nature to get stuck in the tissue box / sheo's nature to be wild and unpredictable and messy. (the difference being that sheogorath is an all-powerful god cat..... do u see my vision???)

anyway this got crazy long JHDSHFSD... to finish i wanted to look at this extra bit of characterization i found that was wild to me:

^ like. i truly dont get where they got THIS characterization LMAO sheo constantly calls haskill faithful and smart and knowledgeable in oblivion, he practically begs you to summon haskill for help, hyping up his boyfriend so to speak, they care for each other your honor so of COURSE sheo trusts haskill to do his job. what are the legends writers doing in there!!

ANYWAY dear god this got long im going to bed <3