#i didn’t quite expect the emo dog to win. but hey

[lpsotd]

🎉 sheepdog #465 has won the best little pet shop canines poll !! 🎉

[quillyfied]

wip wednesday: Suboptimal Omens

have some fun Suboptimal Omens times, featuring two lovable demons interfacing with management over the impending Apocalypse.

2008 AD, just outside Waterdeep

Three figures lurked in the cemetery at night.

Paultin didn’t know what he was expecting. Hell didn’t exactly win awards for innovation in the Creepy Evil Aesthetics category. An abandoned country churchyard, home to the debaucheries of local bored teens, was as good a spot as any; at least Jarlaxle finally let that stupid nightclub of his go under, so Paultin didn’t have to meet on that guy’s slimy turf. Would’ve peeled the poor Mandolin’s paint to get that close. As it was, Strix was doing enough damage to it by digging her nails into the upholstery as Paultin drove them through the woodsy backstreets about an hour outside of Waterdeep. Honestly, he was only going twenty over, that was tame for him.

“Will you relax? It’s fine,” Paultin huffed as Strix shrieked over a nearly-hit rabbit now rethinking its life choices in the Mandolin’s exhaust trail.

“I don’t know,” Strix fretted. “It’s never good when they give us both assignments in person. Must be really nasty.”

“It’s fine,” Paultin repeated, and continued driving. The Mandolin blasted its emo music (because, as everyone knows, if you leave a CD in a car for over a fortnight, it inexorably turns into an emo punk rock album from the last fifteen or so years, and the Mandolin was no exception to this unfortunate phenomenon) into the still summer night as they finally made it to the graveyard. Paultin and Strix both groaned when the headlights illuminated the three demonic figures still well within a solid lurking position.

“Why did he have to bring Chumba and Wumba?” Strix whined as Paultin cut the engine.

“Because Shemeshka hates us, I guess,” Paultin muttered, and after a deep breath they both exited the car.

“All hail Asmodeus,” Jarlaxle smirked as Paultin and Strix approached. Not for the first time, Pautin wished Strix would let him dress her for these meetings (but, given that he’d attended several of his performance reviews in his bathrobe and slippers, perhaps he had no room to talk); her moth-eaten draping black skirt and cardigan were subject to a lingering, disappointed gaze from Jarlaxle.

“All hail Asmodeus!” the twin terrors Chumba and Wumba squeaked. They were currently in their “human disguise,” Chumba holding Wumba on his shoulders and the two covered in a trench coat and hat. Jarlaxle, of course, looked like a 1700s tragic poet in leather pants, or, in Paultin’s loving vernacular, a huge douche.

“Yeah, hey,” Paultin replied. Strix gave a wild wave. “Sorry we’re late. Traffic was murder—”

“Let’s recount the deeds of the day, shall we?” Jarlaxle interrupted, and Paultin snapped his jaw shut. “I’ve tempted a priest. Not the hardest I’ve ever worked, of course, but Hell will find his soul quite ripe with lust and greed in a decade’s time.”

“Great. Original,” Paultin nodded (Sarcasm? Sarcasm who? Paultin didn’t know any Sarcasm).

“We got a politician,” Chumba said.

“Got him to take a bribe,” Wumba added. “I’d say a year at most on that one.”

“Cool,” Paultin deadpanned.

“I accidentally brought down all the cell networks in Waterdeep,” Strix blurted, then covered her mouth.

“Accidentally?” Jarlaxle raised a (douchey pretentious) eyebrow.

“I—I was—I mean—” Strix fumbled.

“She was just aiming for one,” Paultin swooped in “Bringing them all down is going above and beyond, really.”

“And this will collect souls…how?” Jarlaxle rolled his eyes.

“If you ever stepped up here more than once a decade, you’d know that humans are attached to their phones like life support,” Paultin rolled his eyes back. “They’ll be pissed for hours while the cell phone companies try to work out what happened. Millions of angry people taking it out on each other, on top of the poor customer service representatives, who will pass it along to people they take calls from in other areas—it’s a cloud of misery over the whole tri-state area. Commendable work, really.”

“Not exactly…craftsmanship,” Jarlaxle sniffed.

“Your face isn’t exactly craftsmanship,” Paultin mumbled under his breath.

“Um—anyway—why are we here?” Strix said loudly as Jarlaxle opened his mouth again.

“For this,” Jarlaxle said, clearly changing what he was about to say and throwing Paultin a sour look. From inside Chumba and Wumba’s trench coat, a sizable picnic basket appeared, and they passed it to Jarlaxle. Paultin’s throat dried up immediately.

“What is it?” Strix asked. “Is it pie? If we needed pie I could’ve made it—”

“It is not pie,” Jarlaxle frowned.

“Pie would be nice,” Chumba said thoughtfully.

“With strawberries and hot dogs,” Wumba smacked his lips. “And worms!”

“Worms and hot dogs don’t go in pie!” Strix cried.

“Not with that attitude, they don’t,” Paultin said, unable to help himself, really.

“Enough! It is not pie!” Jarlaxle bellowed, and in the awkward silence that followed, there was a weak little whimper from inside the basket.

“Oh,” Paultin said, the vague suspicion he’d already had solidifying. He could tell from Strix’s face she didn’t get it still. “Already?”

“Yes,” Jarlaxle huffed, and shoved the basket at Strix. “Sign for it, and await further instructions. For Hell’s sake.”

[13reasonsstuff-archive]

Insensitive Pt 1 (Cyrus)

A/N: Cyrus continues to be my favorite to write. So much so I had to split this in two to get all my ideas out.  This was a very specific request so I hope I imagined it how it was requested, it was a fun one. Send me more Cyrus requests!  (p.s i love this gif. this is my new imagines gif.)

Request: Yes, by anon (x) 

Warnings: Cyrus is a sarcastic emo asshole, also angst ((and it’s me so of course cursing. ))

Word Count: 1357

Popularity. It was one word that defined a lot of people’s lives at Liberty. I saw it destroy friendships and relationships, even result in the masking of crimes. Somehow, I still found myself in that crowd though it often felt like I somehow kept getting caught on a whirling train and couldn’t find an escape route. It felt stupid to wish it would just go away when so many people clamored for it and now I just sounded conceited. I felt like I never could win. Either way people expected me to be a certain way and If I wasn’t I risked being casted away on the island of misfit toys where the emo’s and the hipsters lived in perfect harmony. I liked MCR as much as the next misunderstood teen, and I liked a good cold brew coffee occasionally, but neither of those things fit into my archetype apparently.

English was my last class of the day and also my favorite. I loved leaving school with Poe or Plath on the brain. It made me giddy to go home and reread their work while I attempted to avoid texts about various parties that gross members of the baseball team would no doubt be attending. It was my happy place and on a Monday afternoon a teenager in a black band t-shirt with a dog-eared copy of “The Lottery” sent that happy place into a tail spin.

“Mr. Walker we both know that’s not an approved title or part of the lesson plan this semester, put it away.”

“Why isn’t it approved? Please enlighten us Mrs. Taylor.” The boy looked smug, both feet stretching his chair back to the point where it teetered between snapping back and falling backwards. I almost gasped out loud as it squeaked.

“Mr. Walker I don’t need a copy of that atrocious glamorizing of violence in my classroom and I do not need to explain why to you. Put. It. Away.”

“As soon as you give me a good reason.”

“It is a senseless and tasteless text that only serves to promote violence and anger. It’s not something young people need to be reading Mr. Walker.”

“I’ve never even heard of it.” Zach said from the back of the class. I felt the need to role my eyes and sigh internally. As sweet as he was I was sure that boy didn’t read period.

“See Mr. Walker In fact I guarantee none of your classmates have even thought about picking up that text you’re so adamant about defending.” I had read it. I had like it too.

“I don’t think any of them read at all.”

Now I was offended. I spoke before I could fully think the decision through.

“I’ve read it.” I said louder than I expected. Both the combat boot wearing offender and the teacher turned to me.  

“The princess speaks.” He said smirking. “Didn’t know you read.”

“I didn’t know you actually attended classes, so I guess we’re both surprised.” I said narrowing my eyes as I stared right back at him.

“Look, if both of you want to avoid detention you can argue the book over an assignment. Consider it extra credit which we all know you need Mr. Walker. Convince me the book is something other than grotesque and I’ll do a unit on it and you two can avoid detention for the rest of the semester.”

“Seriously.” He said leaning his chair forward smiling.

“What? I don’t-“

“Or you could have detention. It’s your choice.” Mrs. Taylor said. I was silent.

“I guess it’s settled then. Book report on my desk in a week.” As the bell rang I felt my heart sink. This was the very last thing I wanted to do. The boy walked over to my desk as I gathered my things and tried to pretend I could avoid speaking to him, but I couldn’t for long.

“Cyrus.”

“I’m –“

“I know your name, everyone does it’s hard not to actually miss student council treasurer. Tell me does it ever get tiring? All that smiling at the rallies? Do you have to use Vaseline on your teeth?”

“Do you have to use a sharpie to get your eyeliner like that or did you get punched by someone? Considering your personality, I’d guess the latter.” I said standing up. I didn’t need to take his bullshit. I’d write the whole damn thing myself if I had too. I heard the jingle of chains on a pant leg. He was following me.

“Hey, you’re kind of feisty.”

“I’m kind of not in the mood for bullshit actually. Same thing I guess.”

“Where do you want to do this assignment thing?” I was ignoring him at this point walking towards the door to fresh air and freedom from this place.

“Monet’s has good coffee. Look I’ll buy ok god I’m sorry.” I guess some help was better than none. I reluctantly turned around.

“You ride a bike right?”

“What.”

“A bike y’know those things that don’t have engines.”

“Oh yeah, yeah I do.”

I sighed. “I have a bike rack attached to the back of my car. Hook it up and I’ll drive.”

He smirked. “Cool ok I’ll be right back.”

As I walked to my car I could see Chloe standing next to it. “Shit.” I muttered to myself. The girl was unaware and mostly oblivious however if you paid close enough attention you could see her smile never quite reached her eyes.

“So what was that about in English?”

“I had actually read the book?” I answered it like a question mostly because I was confused by her sudden line of questioning.

“Ok, but did you have to tell everyone you did? Couldn’t you have just left it alone?”

“What does it matter?”

“It matters to me and the rest of the squad if you’re going rogue on us.”

“Rogue? It’s a book Chloe and I’m not sorry for saying how I feel. Jesus. You should try it some time.”

“I know my place here, but sometimes I don’t know if you know yours.” She said.

I had struck a chord. I didn’t mean to hurt her, but I didn’t want to hear her run her mouth either. It was a rare time I put my own feeling over someone else’s and I was already regretting it.

“Look Chlo-“

“No, it’s fine. “She began to walk away, but stopped. “Hey, you’re still gonna cover for Bryce at the honor board meeting, right?”

“Half the team beat the shit out of Clay in the locker-room with a bag over his head Chlo.”  

“I already told you he wasn’t a part of it.”

“The rest of the honor board doesn’t seem to think so.” I said.

“Well, change their minds.” She said walking away. “Love you!” she yelled out.

If anything, else got added to my plate today I was going to scream, or have a nervous breakdown. I couldn’t in good faith cover for him, but as a member of the cheer squad and the honor board it was my job to. Cheer always came before honor, it was half the reason Marcus had elected me in the first place. Another person on the inside. Another person to do the dirty work. I had always found a way to ride the line, but this time I didn’t think I could and that was more stressful than any assignment ever could be.

“So, you’re their rat too huh?”

Cyrus had returned and apparently heard the entire conversation.

“Eavesdrop much?”

“Only when it’s interesting. Always knew the honor board was a bunch of bullshit.”

“It’s not. At least most of the time.” I said shrugging.

“It’s all bullshit really.” He said hooking his bike into the rack. “You sure your friends won’t throw a tantrum if I’m seen in your car?”

“I’m sure they will, but I don’t really care right now.” I said getting into the front seat. He looked puzzled and for a minute he smiled to himself before he got into the passenger side.

A part of me wished Monet’s served alcohol.

[yourhappypappypatton]

*nudges you shyly* Hi I love Logince too

l would LOVE to do 126 with Logince. 126: “There is only one bed.”Pairing: Logince (Can be seen as platonic or pre-relationship. Either way Ro has a crush.) and background MoxietyWord Count: 1588Warnings: A little cursing, Roman is a little suggestive, Roman likes his butt a lot.Summary: Human AU! The Squad ™ is over at Patton’s house for a visit but the guest bedroom only has one bed. Logan and Roman are both in the guest bedroom.

The four friends were staying at the Shea’s house. Patton’s mothers were incredibly welcoming and loving, not to mention accepting. Of course they were, though, if their son could love so openly and so much. They were also wonderful cooks, something Roman was incredibly thankful for. It was nice, having something to eat from top ramen and chinese takeout, a home-cooked meal at that He hadn’t noticed how much he’d mist that particular part of his home life until he had it again. Something he didn’t miss, however, was having a set bedtime. “Boys! It’s time for lights out!” Patton’s mom yelled up the stairs. Roman looked at the clock in disbelief. It was hardly 8:30! What the heckity-heck? Five abs and one peck… who actually went to bed at such a decent time anymore? Apparently the Shea’s did, seeing as Patton called “Ok, mom! Goodnight!” down the stairs while already wearing some fluffy pyjama pants and a shirt covered with cats and dogs. Honestly, come to think of it, Roman wasn’t that surprised. There is no way a family like this doesn’t have a set bedtime.

He rolled his eyes fondly as Patton dragged his boyfriend, Virgil to the bathroom so they could both brush their teeth. “Have fun in there, Panic! At the Everywhere… not too much fun, though.” he added a playful wink. Patton giggled and Virgil flipped him the bird before Patton gasped and shut the door to the bathroom to properly reprimand Virgil. Roman chuckled to himself as he turned on his heel, and picked up his many bags that were sitting on the landing before venturing to the guest bedroom that was previously pointed out to him. He opened the door, anxious to get the weight of his belongings off of his shoulders. Upon seeing what was in the room, however, Roman forgot completely about his bags and slammed the door shut, wide-eyed and red-faced before letting out a breath. He was not expecting to see a shirtless Logan preparing to pull his pyjama shirt over his head…. Not that he was complaining. This just gave him more material to work with for when he was in a boring class or couldn’t sleep late at night and fantasized about himself and his incredibly smart friend getting together, or a little more than that.

Roman could faintly hear the rustling of Logan dressing as quickly as he could before the door was flung open once more, this time by Logan. His hair was a little messed up, the look suited him, Roman couldn’t help himself from thinking. In any case, Roman couldn’t ignore the pink tint on Logan’s cheeks. Logan cleared his throat and pushed his glasses up his nose. “I apologise, Roman. It is evident that I did not make my presence in this room too well known. I should have let you know that I was chang-” Roman cut him off with his own apology. “No, no, Logan. You are completely in the right, here. It was I who should have knocked or asked if somebody was in here. I just-” “Didn’t think someone else would be there” They spoke together. Logan nodded once while Roman chuckled. Logan then stepped aside and made a sweeping gesture with his arm. “Well do come in, princey. We don’t need you collapsing under the weight of the many unnecessary items that you packed for this weekend.”

Roman pretended to be offended, putting his hand to his chest and gasping indignantly before walking into the room. He knew he would never admit it, but Logan loved him being overdramatic. He could just tell. “Pardon me, Logan, but three hair straighteners, my entire collection of makeup, and over half my wardrobe was completely necessary.” He was exaggerating a little. He only packed a quarter of his wardrobe this time. Roman sighed in relief when he finally put the bags down. Then, and only then did he take in the room. There was a nice little dresser, a small closet. Damn. if it were a walk-in, he could make some closeted jokes. There was a full-body mirror, a desk, one bed, and a- wait. One bed. “Hey, Lo?” ROman couldn’t help but seek gudence from his friend. “Yes, Roman? Do you need help unpacking?” “Very funny, microsoft turd. No, I just wanted to say… Uh, there is only one bed. Do you want me to take the floor or-” This time, it was Roman who got cut off. “Absolutely not. Roman, there is a perfectly good bed here that you will sleep on. I shall sleep on the floor.”

Roman huffed. “Logan, it would be incredibly un-princely if I allowed you to sleep on the floor. You shall take the bed.” The brainy friend sighed and went to adjust his tie. Upon remembering he was in pyjamas, he decided to straighten his glasses instead. “Roman Prince, I will either sleep on the floor, or we are sharing the bed.” “Fine, Logan Baker, you win. We’ll share.” Roman could see the infuriating smug curve upwards of Logan’s mouth as he reached his hand forward. “Wonderful.” Roman took his hand and shook it. “Fantastic.” “Magnificent.” “Glorious.” “Sublime.” “Epic” “ “Tremendous.” “I’m going to change now.” Roman announced as he dropped Logan’s hand. He could have sworn that he heard a miniscule chuckle when he turned around. He shook it off, rummaged around in his luggage for a while, and then pulled out his pyjamas. He was actually very grateful he chose these ones because they make his butt and pecs look great and they were comfortable. The latter part really doesn’t apply to what might help him with his whole Logan situation, but it’s always a bonus. He quickly stripped off his “If you can hear the people sing, it’s probably me and my theatre friends” and replaced it with an equally horrible theatre joke- but this time as pyjamas. It read “Avenue LGBTQ” with the Q in the fuzzball in the original Avenue Q poster. He took longer with his pants just in case Logan happened to be watching… Not that he cared if he did or not. Afterwards, he stretched in a way that was only slightly exaggerated and turned around.

Logan looked rather bored as he mindlessly scrolled through something on his phone. “Are you finished quite yet? I want to figure out our sleeping arrangements.” Roman could feel his face flush and he grumbled “Yeah, I’m done. What’s up, specs?” Logan closed his book and faced Roman. “I wish to have the side with the table on the side of the bed. It will be most useful to me seeing as I require to have my glasses nearby at all times.” Roman almost bust out laughing. “You didn’t have to ask for that, nerd. Of course you can have that side of the bed.” Logan continued as if he didn’t hear Roman, although his voice got softer… a little more hesitant. “Would you mind if we didn’t separate our designated sides of the bed via a wall of pillows? I do not exactly mind your company.” Roman blinked a few times in shock before grinning and nodding. “That’s no problem!” Logan nodded with a soft smile on his face, stood up, and peeled back the sheets and comforter on his side of the bed, got in gracefully, and smoothed the sheets back over his body. He took off his glasses, turned off the bedside lamp, and settled in for the night. Roman, however, had to brush his teeth and wash his face before bed, and took care of that first. It took significantly longer for him to make it into the bed. Once he did, though, he barely dared to breathe in case he would somehow disrupt the peaceful, deep breaths and warm weight of his friend. Roman could practically feel his heart screaming at him to get closer to Logan, but he resisted. He turned away from Logan, and closed his eyes, willing himself to sleep, and eventually, he drifted off.

Roman opened his eyes slowly, feeling warm and content. He burrowed closer into whatever warm, strong mass was encompassing him. That’s funny, he could practically feel something combing through his hair. As Roman’s senses came to him, he got more tense. Oh god. He was in a bed with Logan. He was pressed up against something warm. Something was definitely running through his hair. Roman shot up into a sitting position, stammering apologies and excuses at a mile a minute, his brain reeling and his mouth just spouting out whatever. He couldn’t help but feel that he messed up. Logan would be so weirded out. Logan will think you’re weird. Damn it, Roman. You’d better just sleep on the floor until the visit is over.

A hand on his shoulder distracted Roman from these thoughts. He looked up to see Logan’s bespectacled face. Logan raised his eyebrows and repeated his words from the previous night. “Are you quite finished yet, Roman?” Roman pressed his lips together and nodded. Logan nodded back. “Wonderful. Roman, please come back into my arms.” Roman looked at Logan dumbly, cleared his ear and asked Logan to repeat himself. Logan sighed. “Please come back to our previous position. I told you last night that I enjoy your company, and that includes your unconscious cuddling.” Roman practically launched himself into Logan’s waiting arms. Logan began roboticly stroking Ro’s hair again, Roman sighed in content and burrowed closer into Logan’s chest.

(A/N) As I’ve said before, I’m a sucker for Logince. I’m also a sucker for Moxiety and Human AU’s. This encompassed all three… haha. Anyways, please send me a prompt from this list or your own imagination by clicking here!

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[shanedawsonfanfiction-blog]

But I Am Not A Superhero. Chapter 1.

Chapter One. November 19, 2017.

It was nearly four in the morning and I was laying in my bed, watching YouTube with my earbuds plugged in, actually one of his conspiracy videos, when the video suddenly paused and my phone started playing his ringtone, the intro of his hit song, ‘Superluv’.

Why is Shane calling me? I thought to myself as I looked at his number on my screen.

I bit my lower lip, listening to the ringtone start all over. I hadn’t heard from Shane since he started dating a Hilary Duff look-alike YouTuber called Lisa Schwartz, so it took me off-guard when I heard his ringtone.

The day that I actually got the guts to tell Shane that I liked him more than a friend was actually the day that he had huge news. So naturally I let him tell me the huge news first.

‘Stupid idiotic me.’

The huge news was that he was dating Lisa. So of course I didn’t tell him how I felt.

My thumb hovered over the red reject button, I really didn’t want to play catch up with him. I knew that it would really hurt because I still had feelings towards him. But something in the pit of my stomach made me answer Shane’s call. I pulled out the earbuds as I heaved a heavy sigh then hit the green button on my screen.

“Shane?” I asked, putting the phone to my ear, in utter shock, I moved so that I was sitting on the edge of my full sized bed, pulling the cord of my nightstand lamp.

I ran my thin fingers through my semi-long brown hair. It short of looked like the cut Shane had back in 2012. So it was kinda short, barely hitting my shoulders and covering my right eye.

‘Very emo and very not in style but I didn’t care. I like it.’

“Jess, hey.” Shane said softly then he cleared his throat, pulling away his phone slightly as he did so, “Did I wake you? I forgot about the three hour difference.”

“No, I was actually watching one of your videos, they are very creepy and well researched on your part.” I admitted softly, “You have changed just a little bit, still hilarious but more grown up. Though I can still see the nineteen year old Shane, sometimes.” I laid on my back in the middle of my bed, looking at my ceiling light that was shut off.

“Thank you, I am glad you still like my videos.” He said, it sounded like he was also laying down, probably on the brown leather couch in his office or the gray couch in the living room, “Do you actually think I have changed?”

“Yes, you have changed. I think I actually like the newer videos a bit more than your older videos. But I will always love your older videos, because... Well... They are a part of my younger adulthood.”

“I understand that, Jess. Thank you for saying that.” Shane said to me, “Are you still living with Momma Barnum and your sister, Sophia?”

‘Very odd question to ask.’

I wrinkled my forehead in confusion, I was surprised that he remembered my half-sister’s name, and just because it had been so long that we talked last.

Shane and I were the same age, had similar pasts, and had the same sort of shit to deal with. Like a single parent household, a father that we didn’t like, and having issues with bullies. So of course, we became very close. I remember thinking of him as my slightly older brother.

‘Well until those feelings changed into something more.’

I stood up and walked to my old oak desk, opening my laptop and logging into my Twitter, “I do still live at home. I actually tried to live in a group home for mentally disabled adults, as you know, it wasn’t a fit for me.” I went to his profile and liked a few of his tweets.

My biological father shook me when I was two months old. I had a brain bleed so some things were effected, like my speech, my balance and my fine motor skills. I was all there mentally. I got made fun of all the fucking time by my disability (even from a few family members, I’ll get to that a bit later) before most people got to know the real me.

As I grew up, in a way like Shane, I also had a persona. A better version of myself that I used online or when I met new people in real life. There were only a slim few who actually knew the real me. Shane was one of them, of course.

Shane and I actually met on a website called. We became best friends that way and once we were comfortable with each other, I finally told him about my disability and he didn’t judge me, and he actually supported me. Which utterly shocked the living crap out of me, even after him knowing I was half expecting him to go away and never contact me ever again.

“Because you are physically disabled, not mentally disabled.” He sounded like he was now walking around his house, “That was a horrible fit for you, no doubt. Why did you even try the group home? Knowing you and knowing that you are independent and whatnot, you just need some help, living there just for a few days would drive you fucking crazy.”

“My case manager wanted me to get a taste of living alone. I lasted like five days till I wanted to shoot my brains out. They treated me like a fucking four year old, I had to stay in my bedroom twenty-four/seven with a roommate who would look at me for hours on end, I had to stay in my pajamas, unless I had any visitors and they didn’t understand that I was vegan. I’m not vegan anymore, by the way. I love meat and other shit way too much.” I said, laughing a little at the end. Then I logged out of Twitter and went back on my bed and laid on my back.

He made a tutting noise over the phone call, “Jess.” He sighed. I bit my lower lip slightly, loving that he still cared even after all these years, “Well, at least you tried it and found out that a group home isn’t for you. Would you ever want to try to live alone or with a friend that you trust more than anything?”

I narrowed my brown eyes slightly, ‘Why is he asking me these kind of questions?’ I thought to myself as I saw the door open slightly and I heard a soft squeaky meow. It sounded more like a mouse but I knew that meow. It was my kitten’s meow, Persephone.

I shrugged as Persephone, my six month old kitten, who looked just like Shane’s cat Muffins, she climbed onto my chest and head-butted my left hand a few times, as if to say ‘Pet me, Momma. Please Momma, pet me.’ I gave in and petted her, “Sure, I mean I am almost thirty, just like you. I do not want to live with my family till I die, that would be just sad. And don’t get me started on my sex life. It sucks. Like ‘yup, I live with my overbearing mother, lets fuck while she isn’t home’.”

We both cracked up into a fit of laugher at that. It felt so good, laughing with Shane again.

“But I hardly get laid because when I finally tell them that I am disabled, they disappear like a puff of smoke. So my sex life is like yours when you were in high school.”

“That has to suck.” He said, “Now name three places you want to either live or visit.” He said to me. I stayed silent for a few moments, thinking hard, “Paris, Germany and California. Why are you asking?” I rubbed Persephone’s neck softly and she started to purr loudly.

“Just curious.” He said simply and I narrowed my eyes.

‘I know him better than anyone, he has a reason.’

I sat back up, making Persephone jump off of me, as she hissed at me angrily because she was comfortable on my chest, “Sorry, kitty.” I said softly, putting my feet on the hard iron bar that held up my mattress, “Shane Lee, I know you better than I know myself, so spill.” I put my elbows on my knees.

I only used his middle or real last name when I was sort of upset or mad at him. I really did know Shane better than myself and sometimes it scared me.

Shane was silent for a few moments then I heard him sigh, “Ryland and I broke up about a week ago.” I heard a cupboard door creek open over on his end, he was eating his feelings and that made me want to hug him and comfort him.

“Shane... I am so sorry. Do you want to talk about it?” Wait, of course you don’t, never mind. I said in a soft voice. I shook my head in disbelief. I was actually happy that he had found someone else that made him happy.

‘Lisa and now Ryland. People who I thought would stick with Shane till they die.’

“I am okay.” Shane said, his mouth full of whatever he opened in the cupboard and stuffed in his face. Knowing him it was probably a package of Reese’s cups or some other kind of chocolate.

“Shane...” I started to say, but he stopped me, “Jessa, I am okay. Really.”

“Okay, I’ll drop it.” I sighed, I knew when to not to push him to talk about things because he would just shut down and I didn’t want to stop talking to him quite yet.

“Thank you, Jess.” He said, I heard him walking through his house, “So I have another question for you.”

“You want to ask if I would be willing to visit you, aren’t you?” I asked, laying back down on my bed, playing with a strain of my hair with two fingers.

‘I wouldn’t mind keeping him company, he is not living with Momma Yaw anymore and he has his shit together now. Well, somewhat put together. We could take care of each other, I could help him heal and he could help me live on my own. It would be a win-win.’

“I was leading up to that question, but yes. Would you want to finally meet? Stay with me for a month or something. We can play by ear when you get here. What do you think about that?”

I rolled onto my stomach, “Well, now you are in a better headspace, you have your own place, and you are more than able to take care of me. I see no reasons why we can’t meet each other now.”

“Would Momma Barnum even let you travel across the country to see someone that you met over the Internet?” Shane asked then I heard him tell Uno ‘No.’ His dog was probably doing something bad.

“What is Uno doing?” I asked as I smiled a little.

“He was jumping on me. I am trying to teach him not to jump on people when he is excited about something. Anyway, do you think Teri will let you?” Shane had suddenly became serious because he would hardly ever use my mother’s real name.

I sat up on my knees, I grabbed a pillow and hugged it against my chest, “Maybe, if I tell her who you are and that you won’t rape me, murder me and chop my dead body in a dozen pieces and throw my body in the ocean or something.”

Besides watching his YouTube videos for hours on end, I had another bad habit of binge watching crime shows like ‘Deadly Women’, Wives with Knifes’ and some others. I actually took a course in high school about solving crimes and I of course, aced it.

I heard his laugh and it made my heart do a dozen or so backflips. I gripped my pillow a little tighter as I smiled softly, trying not to squeal.

“No I won’t do anything bad to you. If it makes you feel any better, Momma Yaw is actually going to be in Chicago in a few days, I could tell her to make a pit stop to Detroit and pick you up. So that you won’t be flying to California all alone. I remember you saying that you only flew once. Coming to the United States from Germany and you can’t even remember it because you were a baby.”

He was being serious!

“That would be better. For Momma Barnum’s nerves and mine. So I’d be with Momma Yaw on the plane, not all alone?” I asked chewing on my lower lip.

“Not all alone, not at all. I promise you that. She would be with you the whole way. Then when you land at LAX, I’ll pick you two women up, then depending on the time that your planes land, we could go out for food or just head home.”

This was a different Shane from the years beforehand, the last time we were trying to meet each other, we couldn’t form a plan to save our lives. But now, he had everything planned out.

See what happens in only a few years later.

“Well, Momma Barnum really can’t say no, I am not a kid anymore so all I have to do is to tell her what is going on, tell her that we have everything planned out.”

“Very true. Oh and you don’t need to bring any money. I am more than willing to buy you what you need when you get here.” I could hear him take a few gulps of something, then swallow, “Think of it as an all paid vacation.”

“Sounds wonderful.” I laughed a little, “But that would probably be the selling point for Momma Barnum. We are still struggling with money. We make ends meet and get everything paid. We just don’t have a lot of left over money after paying all the bills and getting food.” I slid off of my bed and walked to my closet door.

“Been there, so I understand. Not a fun time. So are you really thinking of visiting me?” Shane asked me seriously.

“I am, actually.” Grabbing my black over the shoulder suitcase, “Do you know that exact date that Momma Yaw will be in Chicago?”

“November 29th through December 6th I believe, not really sure. I will text you with the right dates after I call her.” Shane heaved a sigh as if he was sitting down on a couch.

I gently put the suitcase down on my bed and unzipped it, “Another question.” I said, finding Persephone laying on my desk chair.

“Yeah?” Shane asked me through the phone.

“Is Cheeto okay with other kitties? I don’t want to leave my little princess with my family. They hardly remember to give the pets water every day and clean the litter box. I don’t want to worry about her while I am gone.” I picked up Persephone and nuzzled her, she struggled out of my grip because she hated being held.

“Of course, bring your baby with you!” He sounded like he was smiling, “Cheeto will probably hiss at her for a day or two but after a while he will get used to her. Is your princess up to date on her shots and other things?”

“Yes, she is heathy, spayed and flea free.” I said then kissed her head, “You are going to hate the flight but it will be worth it, Persephone.” I told her as she jumped down and climbed onto my bed and laid on it.

“The princess of the Underworld, it is a cool name.” Shane said.

“Yeah, I wanted her to have a princess name but she is a butthead so I decided on Persephone. I tend to call her Seph for short. She kinda looks like she could be a sibling of Muffins or at least maybe a daughter of her.”

“You remember Muffins?” He sounded completely shocked.

‘How could I ever forget about Muffins and his other pets? They were always in his videos.’

“Of course, I see that Momma Yaw is keeping her fat and happy. I follow her on Twitter.” I sat down on my bed looking at my dresser debating on what to pack.

“So you guys are still having money troubles? You kinda hinted it before when talking about Momma Barnum letting you visit me.”

I opened my shirt drawer of my short chubby dresser and picked out seventeen shirts (I even grabbed a few Shane Dawson shirts just as a joke) and packed them in the suitcase, then I shut the drawer, “Yeah, we are. We were doing okay for a few years after the divorce from Steve, Sophia’s father and my first step-father. Then Momma Barnum met an I.T web designer guy for Ford on Match.com, and got hitched soon afterward. But he cheated on a twenty-three year old church lady who sings in the fucking choir only four years after getting married, and she looks like a freaking whale. Downgrade, I am telling you.”

“Oh, that must have been horrible. I am sorry about that. Is that why you practically jumped at coming to visit me?” Shane asked then he called Cheeto to him then said, “My freaking cat hates me. He literally walked away from me.”

I chewed on my lower lip, putting my folded clothes in my suitcase, “Partly, but mainly it’s because I wanna meet you and cheer you up.”  Then I sat on my desk chair, “And don’t fucking lie to me, I know that he loves you.”

“I understand that, meet you favorite older brother and get away from the stress of money issues.” He laughed a little as I opened my closet door and grabbed my four hoodies, one gray, one pink and two black. I folded them and put them in the suitcase, then I shut the closet door.

“What are you doing?” Shane asked, I guess he could hear me moving around my bedroom.

“Packing some stuff now, so I don’t wait last minute.” I said opening my jean drawer, then grabbing only nice skinny jeans. Seven pairs. Three in black, two in gray, one black with white strips and another single pair in dark blue.

“Always need to be ready, don’t ya?” he joked. He knew that I always had to be organized. Even more so when it came with trips.

I balanced my phone between my cheek and shoulder as I folded my jeans so that were folded in a smaller square, “Shut up.” Then I put the jeans in the suitcase.

I decided to pack my other clothes when the day came nearer, so I put my suitcase near my desk with a light ‘flop’.

“I’ll let you go for now, okay? I really need to edit some videos that I did in the past few days.” He said to me, “Don’t be a stranger, you can text me and call me whenever you want. I hardly ever asleep.”

“Okay. I’ll text you when I tell Momma Barnum about visiting you.” I said as I sat on my bed, “It was great to hear from you again.”

“It was, I am glad I decided to call you. Talk soon, okay?” He said.

“Okay, bye.” I said as I laid on my bed, smiling softly I plugged in my phone and rolled over to my left side.

“Bye Jess.” He said then he hung up.

I put my phone on my nightstand, plugged it into my charger and shut off my light. I covered myself with my bedsheets and decided to get a few hours of sleep before I had to take care of my mother’s dog for her while she went to work.

--

I heard my mother’s footsteps on the main floor, headed to the bathroom, I rolled over on my back and rubbed my eyes.

After I yawned, I looked at my phone, it was six in the morning and I had a text message waiting for me from Shane. I clicked on the message as I smiled.

Shane- I was right, Nov. 29 through Dec. 6. She said she could come and get you in the morning of the seventh.

I smiled at the text, I didn’t reply because I didn’t want to bother him while he edited his videos. I slid off my bed and grabbed my red wire rimmed glasses and putting them on then I made the way out of my bedroom and to the dining room. I sat down on a high back wooden chair, “Morning Mom.” I said as I saw her walk out of the bathroom.

My mother was fifty-two and looked a lot more like thirty-two. She also looked a lot like me but a tad older. She had long black wavy hair, big brown eyes and very pale skin. She was a little heavy set but she made it look good. She was in her dark blue nursing uniform.

“Hi, you are awake early.” She said as she walked to the kitchen to make us cups of coffee with the one cup brewer that we had.

“Do you remember Shane?” I asked, opening up the convocation.

She handed me my orange kitty coffee cup, the tail was the cup’s handle. The cat kind of reminded me of Cheeto. She nodded, “The guy from YouTube? Yeah I remember him. Was that who you were talking to earlier this morning? You weren’t quiet.”

I held my coffee cup with both hands and blew on the hot liquid, “Yes, he called me.” I glanced up at her and set my coffee cup down, “He asked me to visit him. I really want to, Mom. And before you ask me a dozen questions, we have it all set. His mother is going to pick me up on December seventh, he said I don’t have to buy anything or bring any money with me and...” I sighed shrugging, “I really want to see him, Mom.”

“He lives in California, correct? That is a long way from Michigan.” She glanced at me as she held up her green frog coffee cup, “Will you be on the plane all alone?”

‘I knew she would ask me a million of questions.’

“No, his mother is going to fly with me back to California.” I said the sipped my coffee, “She is going to be in Chicago and then she would come here to get me before going back home.”

“When are you coming back home?” She asked me, glancing at me.

I bit my lower lip, “He suggested a few weeks or a month, we don’t really know.” I admitted softly, looking at her, “maybe more than that. It depends on me I guess. If I like it, I might stay longer, but if I don’t I’ll come home sooner.”

She nodded, “Okay, are you taking your kitten with you?” She stood up and packed a lunch for herself.

“I asked and Shane seemed excited on having another cat in his house for a while.” I said, tapping my fingers on my coffee cup.

“Don’t forget your health care cards when you pack your I.D.” My mother said, “If you have a fall or something, you will be able to go to the E.R without any trouble.”

I snapped my head up to look at her, “You are letting me go? Like for real? You aren’t bull shiting me?”

This can’t be happening! I actually thought she’d say no!

“I am not bull shiting you. I know you always wanted to meet him and I also remember how heartbroken you were when he was dating his girlfriend. Lisa.” She walked to me and pushed back my hair, then kissed my forehead, “I won’t hold you back from meeting him.”

I wrapped my arms around her middle, “Thank you! Thank you!”

She patted my head, “No problem. I am off on the seventh so I can take you to the airport. I don’t want to have Sophia to drop you off all alone without me.”

I smiled and nodded, “Thank you again.”

She shook her head and sat back down to finish her coffee, “Just take a lot of pictures and send them to me, alright? I just want to know that you are having fun with him.”

I smiled brightly, “I will, I promise!”

Suddenly we heard noises from the basement and then I saw Tobias and Sophia. Tobias was Sophia’s very stupid, untrained dog.

“Morning…” Sophia muttered as she took her dog outside then walked to the bathroom.

“She has to take me to work, because her and her gang are going to the mall today.” Our mother explained to me.

I tried not to roll my eyes, when I was a kid while we were poor, I hardly went out to the mall with my friends. I went back to my coffee.

Sophia walked out, her long blue hair up on a messy bun. She walked to the living room and put on her black slip-on shoes while with one hand she was looking at her iPhone screen. Then she let in her stupid hound dog and fed him, without uttering anything else to us.

‘How she could do anything without actually looking at what she was doing, I never knew how she could do that. Crazy.’

Sophia was seventeen years old, slightly heavy set, hazel eyes that she always had dark eye liner around them and she always had her hair dyed a weird color, this month it was bright blue.

“I am ready whenever you are.” Sophia said to our mother, grabbing the car keys. We only had one car so they had to share it. I learned how to drive but I was terrified to actually drive so I never did.

“Okay.” She looked at me, “Your clothes are in the dryer so tell Sophia to bring it up later today so that you can pack.” Our mother said as she pointed at me, “You have your suitcase? I can tell Sophia to look for it for you in the basement.”

I nodded, “I got it. It was in my closet. I have some things packed in it already.” I said softly.

Our mother smiled and walked to the table, grabbing her coffee cup, “Of course you have. You are always prepared and always early for things.”

“You going somewhere?” Sophia asked as she looked at her iPhone screen, still in living room. Her eyes were almost always glued on the goddamned screen.

‘Could she do anything without looking on her phone screen? I swear.’

“Jess is going to visit Shane for a while.” Our mother said as she rinsed out her coffee cup in the sink.

Sophia walked into the dining room, “Shane? Shane Dawson? Seriously?” she rolled her hazel eyes at me, “He has been on YouTube for ten years. He had lost his humor, when he shaved his hair. To me, he is dead.”

I glared at her, “I think he got better over time, I mean he did grow up.” I raised an eye brow at her, “That’s what most people tend to do after they turn a certain age.” I glared at her.

“He is stupid. His content is lame and he steals ideas from other YouTubers.”

I rolled my eyes, “Actually, no he isn’t, unlike newer YouTubers he doesn’t need to beg for views or likes or buy for views. Now that is stupid. And for a fact, no he doesn’t ‘steal’ ideas and if he does, he tells us whose idea that he stole so he won’t get mean comments.”

I learned a while ago that some newer YouTubers actually bought themselves views or likes. How fucking sad.

‘Thankfully Shane never had to do that.’

Sophia glared at me and was about to open her mouth but our mother snapped her fingers at her, “Okay enough!” She looked to Sophia then to me, “Jess is going, so don’t make fun of him and don’t hold her back from packing. After you get home you go back downstairs and bring up her clothes before you hang out with your friends.” She kissed my cheek, “Bye honey.” Then she grabbed her nursing bag and her lunch bag, “Okay, I am ready, let’s go.”

“Bye Mom.” I said, holding my coffee cup with both hands.

As soon as I heard the front door shut, I walked back to my room, unplugged my phone and clicked on Shane’s contact, I decided to call him, hoping that I didn’t wake him up.

“Hey.” Shane’s voice answered after the third ring, “Did you tell Momma Barnum already? That was fast.”

“Yes and I can come visit you!” I said sitting back down at the dining room table after shooing Persephone from my coffee cup. My cat loved sneaking anything that I was drinking or eating.

“She is off work on the seventh so that is wonderful, I just know if Sophia had to drop me off she would just drop me off at the door and leave.” I explained to him.

“I knew she would let you.” Shane laughed, “Sophia sounds rude. She wouldn’t want to watch you take off?” He sounded upset.

I took a sip of my coffee then smiled, “She cares more about her friends then her own family. So our mother’s will meet.” I set my coffee cup down and pulled up my feet up on the chair then I put my pointed chin on my knees, “That will be neat.”

“That will be cool, take pictures of our mother’s meeting each other.” Shane said.

“Will do.” I said to him, then I quivered slightly, “Argh, it is getting cold here.”

“I think visiting me would be good for your tense muscles, I remember you saying that freezing cold weather makes your muscles tense up. Maybe staying in California will be way better for you. Get you away from your family and away from the snow.”

“I know, I am glad that you called while it’s getting colder here.” I said, getting up, making another cup of coffee, “Do you have any plans for when I get there?”

“Yeah, I do. I plan to take you around town, to see the sights, take you to my favorite restaurants and to meet a few of my friends Kate.” Kate was his longest best friend, I recalled, that made me smile, knowing that he was willing to let me meet people that he was very close with.

“Then Drew, he is interested in meeting you. Garret for sure because you two have a weird obsession with Harry Potter and Trisha wants to meet you. Lisa wants to meet you as well.” He finished.

‘Lisa? That doesn’t sound good.’ I thought to myself.

“Trisha wants to meet me?” I asked in udder shock. She was one of my other favorite YouTubers and Shane did a lot of videos with her and I listened to her songs on my music app sometimes, “And Lisa wants to meet me?” I asked in small voice.

“Yeah, I told Trisha about you.” Shane admitted softly, “I told her that you were my best friend that I had online, that we have similar lifestyles, and that I feel like I can tell you anything.” He said, “And sure, Lisa knows that we were close, so when I suggested on having you around for a while, she told me that she wanted to meet you.”

I knew that they were still friends, but they actually talked about me? I bit my lower lip, “I thought she hated me.” I muttered softly.

“Why would you think that?” Shane asked me.

After only weeks of dating Lisa, he had stopped talking to me completely, just like right out of the blue. I tried to reach out to him every so often, just to check in, but whenever I sent him messages or requested a Skype call he would not reply and reject my Skype calls. After only three weeks of no responses I thought if he really wanted to talk to me, that he would reach out to me. But he never did. Weeks turned into months and months turned into years. I finally gave up and thought that he didn’t really want to be my friend and just thought of him as ‘Shane Dawson, the YouTuber’, not ‘Shane Yaw, my friend’ and that broke my heart into a billion pieces.

“Never mind, it’s nothing.” I said bitterly, not really wanting to talk about anything else other than Lisa wanting to meeting me and I mean anything!

I still had no answers on why did what he did and I was too terrified to ask why because I didn’t want to ruin things right away, so I told myself that I would ask him about why he stopped being my friend after a few weeks into my visit.

Bella and Tobias followed me in the living room and Bella, Mom’s black and silver cockapoo laid next to me while Tobias laid on the blanket on the hard floor near the wide window.

Shane must’ve known he poked at a sore subject for me and he changed it, “Are you getting excited on meeting me?”

“I am, very excited and very nervous as hell.” I said then sipped my coffee as I heard the blue SUV pull up in our driveway and a car door shut and I groaned softly.

“I am glad, Jess. I am actually getting excited as well.” Shane said as Sophia walked in the door and kicked off her shoes as the two dogs jumped on her excitedly.

“Get the fuck off of me.” Sophia snapped at them, pushing them off of her, then she glared at me, “Talking to your gay boyfriend again?” She asked as she rolled her eyes.

“Umm, you shouldn’t gay-shame Shane because you are gay.” I cocked my head at her, “So you should keep your damn mouth shut.” I glared back at her, my anger raising slightly, “And you shouldn’t yell at the dogs, they are just excited to see you.” I snapped at her, shaking my head at her, “Honestly, stop yelling at them, you always yell at them, you hardly ever talk to them nicely.”

“Who are you yelling at?” Shane asked me through the phone laughing a little, “And thank you for sticking up for me, you didn’t really need to.”

Sophia walked to her bedroom, “Come on, Tobias.” Then she whistled for him to follow her and he ran to the basement stairs.

“Sophia. She yelled at our dogs while they were jumping on her and no problem, I don’t know why she hates you so much, she used to be obsessed with you for years.” I explained to Shane petting Bella after she jumped next to me and set her head on my lap,

“I gave your number to Momma Yaw so that she could get ahold to you when you get to the airport and tell you where to meet her.” Shane said and I heard him typing on his keyboard, so that meant he was in his office working on videos.

“Okay, sounds good, I wasn’t even thinking of that.” I heard clicking of a mouse or something, so that meant that he was most likely working on editing some videos, “Am I bothering you?” I asked softly, ashamed that I probably was.

“No, of course not.” Shane said, “I can multitask, don’t worry about bugging me. I like talking to you while I work. It makes it go by faster.”

I blushed slightly, “Okay, you are the boss.”

I could tell that he was smiling, “That I am.” I cracked up and nodded.

“Damn straight.” I said after my laughing fit then I sighed, “I need to tell Sophia to bring up my laundry. Hold on, I am putting the phone down for a bit.”

“Okay, I’ll be here when you get back.” Shane told me.

I quickly put the phone face down on the black wooden table near my spot, then stood up and walked to the stairs, “Did you forget what Mom told you to do for me before you waste money with your friends?” I hollered down the stairs, holding the baby gate at the landing, I had a shadow with me. Bella was sitting right next to my left leg.

“NO! I am doing it now.” Sophia yelled back up at me, obviously lying to me.

She didn’t remember, because I was listening carefully while I was talking with Shane and I didn’t hear her moving around downstairs or the noise of the dryer door opening.

“Yeah right, you were sitting on your bed tweeting or some other shit.” I muttered softly as I walked back to the living room with Bella following me, “Come on, pup.”

“What did you mutter?” Sophia yelled up at me.

I ignored her and sat back down on the couch and picked up the phone, “Back.”

“Welcome back.” Shane said, “Can you do stairs? I was wondering if I needed to put your room on the main floor, don’t want you falling.”

“I can do stairs, slowly but they aren’t trouble.” I said, smiling. He was trying to Jessa-proof his house for me, “Thank you for asking though.”

“No problem I just want to be sure before I make up your room.”

“I understand that completely, I have seen your house due to your videos and Snapchat. I know that your staircase has a railing, so I will be alright.” I explained to him, “I’ll just be slow on them, but slow is better than falling off them.” I petted Bella as I spoke.

“True. Okay, if you are sure.” He didn’t sound convinced but that was okay, I understood his fears of me falling while I was there, I even had that same fear but I knew how to not make it true.

Sophia came upstairs with a basket of my laundry and plopped it right next to my bare feet, almost on one if I didn’t move it in time, “There. Now can I get ready or do you have other shit for me to do?”

“Lose your fucking attitude, Mom told you to do this before you got ready and you of course planned on not doing it at all because you are a total selfish bitch.” I snapped at her, not caring that Shane could hear our discussion through the other line.

“Make me, retard.”  She half whispered as she got into my face.

Everyone who really knew me, knew that I absolutely loathed that word and if you ever used it around me that I would get extremely upset. So I knew that she was just pressing my buttons just because I was talking with Shane.

I shook my head sadly, “Shut your fucking mouth, right now.” I raised my eyebrows at her, “I don’t fucking care if I am on the phone. I will slap you silly.”

“You won’t be able to hit me, you are too fucking slow.” Sophia snapped at me.

I heard a noise on the other end of the call, like Shane uttered something but I missed it.

“Try me, bitch, you are poking the bull and you know it. I know why too, it’s all because I am talking to Shane. I think you are jealous. So get away from me or I will smack you.”

“I’m going back downstairs before I say something that I’ll regret later on.” She said as she walked back downstairs.

“Yeah, you do that.” I muttered softly as I comforted Bella for a moment before I started to fold my clothes.

“She honestly pulled attitude with you for doing something for you? What the flying fuck? I only know you strictly online and I know that you can’t do stairs while holding a huge fucking basket of laundry. What is her fucking deal? ” Shane said when it was silent for a few moments.

I smiled as I shook my head, “It is okay, Shane, really. I am so used to it. And we won’t be strictly online friends in a few.”

“You got a point, you are right, but still.” He said seriously, “Does she normally talk to you like that without your mom there with you guys?”

“Yeah, she does. Even with Mom home, she doesn’t stop her half of the time. She just let’s her. That really helps with my low self-esteem.”

“Seriously, I understand that. I might not let you go back home after your visit.” Shane said, “I mean Jesus Christ just hearing her is making me very pissed off that she treats you like shit all because you can’t so some things on your own. How fucking selfish.”

“If Mom dies before I get out on my own or at least live with a friend, I will have to be taken care by her.” I wrinkled my nose, shaking my head, “It’s just not how she treats me. It’s also how spoiled she is. She knows that we have money issues and she always gets two or three make-up boxes in the mail, per month. I checked how much they are each, they are around thirty dollars per box! That is around ninety dollars per month!”

“That is insane! No, I won’t let you live with her, she’d steal your government money and use it for herself.” He said.

“Then who would I live with?” I asked, smiling softly.

“With me. If you wanted after a few weeks.”

I was silent for a few moments, “Shane…I just couldn’t live with you…”

“Why not? We could be roommates, you had to pay rent of course, but it’d be dirt cheap. I’d give you the friends and family discount.”

I smiled faintly as I continued to fold my clothes, “The friends and family discount?”

“Yeah, dummy. You are a friend of mine.” He laughed a little.

‘Maybe seeing Shane will change my life for the better.’