#i didnt know the ask would disappear from ask box after being answered btw so i wont deleted answered ask anymore

[translationsquestionmark]

Maybe a strange question but I own that serirei doujin you translated. If I scan and clean the rest of it, would you be willing to translate it?

I'd be honored anon. It's such a good dj even with my sloppy translation and messy edit I'll try my best to deliver one of (if not the) best serirei dj to you🫡

[genesisoutback]

Rehab day 17.

● The good, the bad and the dejavu

I started writing 4-5 days ago, but it happened to disappear, how typical.

13 days of hell.

• 1. came all the misunderstanding with their employees, so much they fucked up my medications, and gave me less than what I originally had. Insisted that I took some of my morning/day, afternoon and night medications in the middle of 12am to 7am. But one of the night shift employer rang the nightshift doctor to get me one-time prescribed medication, something she wrote down. But the stupid-ass employers that took over the morning shift didnt see where she wrote it down, nor did the employers at the 3pm afternoon shift. But I got that fixed when the same night shift employer came the next night. This was the first weekend after I came on the 20th, the day after. The weekend went smooth, even tho I found out something alarming on Saturday (We'll get back to that later on) I got the one-time prescribed medication from 21 to 24-25 June. Then my doc suddely cut me down from 14-15 pills of 5 mg Vival/Valium daily to 8 pills a day which I said ok to because I didn't actually realize how fast and how big of a dosage reduction that was. And after a couple of days I got so frustrated by the withdrawals and I Sheldon got one-time prescribed medication, which made everything else worse. And I complained over and over again, but nothing happened. because I started to slam doors, bang my head on the wall, throw stuff around and knotted my door so no one could see me cry, I even ended up locking myself in the closet since that was a normal rutine for me when i was in my teens, and had depression + anxiety. Finally on July 6 I got to speak to both my incompetent doc and head doctor. I explained to her what happened, and that my doctor didnt even bother to check my prescribed history so he could see for himself what he did to me. I didn't even know why I reacted the way I reacted, but realized it 6-7 days later, as in July the 1st. But didn't get it fixed before the head doctor came into the picture and said it herself, that the dosages I've been on before I came inn here then the big dosage reduction on so short timing was dangerous and deadly. So she upped my dosage to 14 pills a day 70 mg Vival/Valium.

• 2. The staff/employers, I gave up in the end with complaints and so fourth, found needles and pumps, user equipment, straw for snorting cokain or speed, a bag in the roof on the bathroom, and blue powder hidden inside lists on the floor and inside a electronic box for plugging in tv channels or Internett and something under the toilet which seemed like wet speed someone had put smeared over to let it dry up. All of the searching stressed me the fuck out and made my anxiety worse. They should have a guideline to follow not to follow their own way of thinking how the rules should be. Each of the staff says one thing and does the opposite. "We'll get the cleaning lady to clean that" "We'll try to preoritize you" "we'll talk to the boss and conplain" and so on. Dissapointments x 100.

• 3. Buprenorphine dosage at 14mg, but actually i am at + 4mg so. 18 mg bup. And I confessed two days ago because I got withdrawals, freezing, but when someone touches my neck or my head it feels like I'm having a fever, but im freezing af, and it's summer time in Norway now. So I confessed that some people (patients) gave me extra because they saw how bad i had it, I freeze soo much I start to shake. and I hid it away til I felt the withdrawals coming. Even though it's not allowed to hide away pills and store them, the other payients saw how badly I had it.

• 4. I meet this lovely lady, and she gives me this mom vibe. I'm afraid of leaving here, which might happen on monday. It's seldom for me to meet people like her. And I wish i could spend more time with her than being cooped up in my room thinking about everything negative. Stressing about my phone being hacked by someone I thought was my bestfriend, she lured me to Oslo to use up my money, break my brand new phone just to get acess to my sim. And even though I changed sim when I got my other phone, how stupid was I to let her use my phone yet again. And while she needed to watch when i used her phone with my effin sim, I couldn't watch when she used my phone.

• 5. I don't remember when it was last time i actually smiled or laughed without it being fake.

6. So I just found out that when I was in a coma for 3 days, and in the hospital for atleast 1 week, my family in the Philippines used up my money. When i specifictly told them to take out the money if they didn't get any contact from me in 5 days. But me, in a coma and all they think about is them self? When I already told them before I went back to Norway that I won't, I can't send them any more money I need to focus on paying down my debt/loan. And those 84k php would have helped alot. But no, how selfish.. even though I've sacreficed so much just to see the kids and my family in the Philippines happy makes me happy. But thinking about spending the money when I was in a coma? I should have never woken up. How is it that I can't be selfish but everyone else can? I felt betrayed, no I still feel betrayed. Even tho one of my sister gave some of it back. When my father called when I was blacked out the other one had used up everything. But when I called she said she had 20k left. How can they lie? I've lost everyone now. Only one left and she's in Canada.

7. It feels like deja vu. Atleast why couldn't you just delete our relationship when you broke up, I couldn't.. then I decided to go to rehab/detox because we we're still 'official' on fb when you already moved on as fast as my x. But insisting that you wouldn't, and promises I said don't promise. Did it take you a week, two or three to find a new bf? I know I won't get an answer from you, since the way you spoke on the phone and when I tried asking you to give me a reason, you sounded angry. Like you wanted me as far away as possible.

8. I feel like I cant write anymore, even though I have alot to say. I want to move faar away, where no one can reach me and I can't reach them. I want to be isolated, alone. Times where I want to do something illegal just to get put in jail.. I could confess to something I didn't do and get payed. Because it needs to be serious or I'll end up at where im going. Violence, murder even Kidnapping, just not underage, and a good reason. From Norway btw so, you know what to if you need something.

My stuffs are already packed. But I only need my bag, not my clothes, just my wallet, shoes, jacket, memorable items, smoke, her hair tie, snus, charger, phone and thats it.

The last two days ive been packed and ready to go.

• Good news, I'll be able to travel, even on medication, and my debt might just be erased, cut down, remove the interest or atleast the money I owe to the goverment.