#i don’t normally write with rhyme? but i’m trying something new ig

[eucalyptgem]

the last time i woke up in tears

was a dream that i’d had where you were no longer here

and your spot is empty

and i’m struck with the fear of always sitting alone in the back seat

it’s a grief that i’ve never known -

i’ve never lost someone so close,

but as dream and reality superimpose

i remember an alternate life spent alone.

my first memory is the day you were born:

the waratah jersey and the pigtails id worn

but mostly your face-

and now the nausea hits

i know your absence doesn’t really exist but will eventually

in big ways, for sure,

but also in ways just as small

as a concert without you or that gap on the wall where your height should be marked

(above me, because of course you became tall)

and eventually one of us will be the first to go

but before that day i’ll make sure you know that i love you

i love you

i love you

even when you steal my blurryface vinyl

and also my jewellery

[valerie]

TWITL – week twelve – sheltering in place

We have been sheltering in place since Monday. When the order came in, it felt so numbing but we had already been self isolating so it also didn’t feel so drastic. It’s stressful and lo, reading things on the internet and watching the news DOES NOT HELP. Yes, let’s be informed with the facts and recommendations on what we can do to mitigate the situation but the conjectures and the rumors and the out and out lies DO NOT HELP. Well, it doesn’t help me. I’m trying to find that balance. I don’t want to ignore what’s going on but I don’t want it to be the only thing on my mind, especially if so much of it is something I cannot control…

So what did we do this past week? Well, we did do another grocery run and our refrigerator and pantry are well stocked at this point. If people would stop hoarding and just buying what they need for a couple weeks, things would be fine. After all, no one has said you can’t go buy food and other household items. Be smart people. Be diligent. Be safe. BE KIND…

I did go in to work for a couple of hours. Not sure if I’ll be able to go in again but I do have lots of work on my desk that need tending. But since nothing can be done at this point, I’m not really in a hurry. No one can really do anything right now. It was weird to be in the office without anyone there but it was great too. No germs spread by me!

the pattern

In this confinement, there are some bright spots. Let’s go bullet style on this:

Tyler Rich & his virtual Rather Be Us Tour. The real tour has been postponed (not cancelled!) and for now, Tyler has been gracing us with IG live “shows.” Wednesday was “Jammin” with Tyler and his friend Hunter Hill (music and drinks and funny stories), Friday was the live acoustic concert (so good!), and Sunday was Day Drinking with Tyler and Sabina (so fun with their various guests). The IG live sets have been a wonderful reprieve from the stress of this current situation…

Simon Kassianides and his daily poetry reading. Simon started reading one poem a day for his followers and I AM LOVING IT! First of all POETRY. Second of all, poetry recited in an English accent. Third, Simon reading poetry in his lovely English accent. It might just be that I’m still sweet on him (and I am, admittedly) but I love that he’s sharing his favorite poems with us. Hell, I love that he likes poetry!…

I’ve started writing a poem a day (again). I was inspired by Simon reading poetry every day and thought I’d do one better by writing a poem every day. I’ve been posting them to my IG story (so they disappear every day) but as I wrote this, I realized I should have highlighted them so I did! I loved writing a poem every day when I did it all those years ago so it’s interesting to start up again. Of course, the poems are super rough and when I’m a little desperate, I’ll do haikus. Maybe I’ll try other forms. I freestyle most of my poems but sometimes, if I’m particularly inspired, I rhyme…

Video chatting and technology in general. I was able to video chat with my sister and cousins this past weekend. Thank goodness! It was good to actually talk, as opposed to just texting or posting on social media. We talked about how our days were going, touching a little on our respective situations. It was good to touch base and I hope we do more of it during this shelter in place and then of course after this is over.

11:11

Oh yes, Jack Whitehall’s May 2nd show has been postponed. Am I bummed? YES. Did I expect it? Yes indeed. I hope that when it gets rescheduled it’s on a Saturday and I can still attend. I do so want to see him live and maybe, just maybe even meet him. Maybe?

TV

Star Trek: Picard – We just have one more episode. I can’t wait and yet I wish it wasn’t already almost over! I have enjoyed every single episode so much and I am so glad that there is a second season in the works. If you can, watch it!

Westworld – I’ve decided that I like any episode featuring Maeve and the amazing talents of Thandie Newton. She is a treat to watch and utterly mesmerizing…

The Mentalist – The hubby has been watching this show and I’ve watched a fair share of the episodes. I’m almost sorry we didn’t watch it during its original run but I am glad we can go through them at our own pace. Last night we got to Charles Mesure’s episode and we’ll be seeing William Gregory Lee’s episode soon as well. It was actually rather nice seeing Charles and thinking, oi, I’ve shaken hands with him! Such a sweet guy. And of course, I’m very much looking forward to Greg’s episode. I might have to do screencaps. Who am I kidding? I’m going to do them.

view through the bathroom window

I hope everyone out there is being safe and diligent. Stay home so we can flatten that curve. The sooner we flatten that curve, the sooner we can get back to a more normal life. While you’re sitting home, maybe take the time to learn something new about yourself and the world. I’m striving for balance. I hope you’re doing the same…

Be well. Be diligent. Be safe.

Oh, and stop hoarding stuff like toilet paper!

from TWITL – week twelve – sheltering in place

[thelostdaimon-blog]

Just In Case

I get not wanting to go to my IG page...maybe you don’t even have an IG, so here is ALMOST all my post on my IG to catch you up on some of the writing i do. Not all of them have names, but they should be all separated by my name. 

Tell me you want to love me

Tell me that I'm your one and only

Tell me that I will be your everything

Tell me why those words seem to sting

Why do they leave such a sour taste

Why does their meaning feel so displaced

Why do I feel like you are giving me excuses

Why do I feel like my emotions leave me useless

And when things ended so abruptly, was it me

And when I see you with her, am I to act carefree

And when my heart breaks, is it not suppose to hurt

And when this all happens, am I not to fall apart?

Don't worry about me, I'll be alright in the end

Don't worry about my feelings, no need to make amends

Don't worry about my heart, it used to being broken

Don't worry about my words, nothing else needs to be spoken

D’Anna Nicole

Every time you say I love you

I never know what to do

My heart skips a beat

My souls feels complete

And I have to wonder if it's really true

Every time I say I love you

Are you feeling anything new

Do these words have the power I want them to hold

Do they make you feel like you are finally whole

Maybe their meaning has fallen through

D’Anna Nicole

From “You”

Why do I wear my heart in my sleeve

And my feelings on my chest?

Why are my thoughts tattooed down my legs

And my past engraved on my skin?

Why is every word I write bleeding red

As if it came from my own veins?

Why is every word I speak painfully light

As if it was ripped out from my lungs?

Why do my fingers shake the pen in my hand

Like I'm afraid of what the ink may say?

Why do my arms wrap so carefully around me

Like they are so ready to give me crumbling body false security?

D’Anna Nicole

From “fairytales”

When I was younger I’d hideaway

Tucked in my own world everyday

From my mother’s excuse

For my father’s abuse  

My books became Bibles

For a Godless world without disciples

D’Anna Nicole

From “a rose by…”

She bled once for her mother who only knew how to leave her

She blood twice for her father who never knew how to love her

She bled for every cruel word that was ever spoken to her

She bled for every man who tried to love her but only left her

Her blood painting  picturesque poetry of passions and paradise

Overlaid on patterns of unsurmountable pain meant to entice

Her mind into believing that she was actually good enough

That someday she could actually be loved by someone

And if there is a single thing she learned from that day

It's that your soul will always be stained red, you can't wash it away

D’Anna Nicole

We layed in bed silently intertwined. My head on his chest, I traced the outline of the tattoos placed above his heart. I listened to each of his heartbeats, trying to put it to song so I could remember it, every moment; when he was gone.

D’Anna Nicole

It's the morning of surgery

When I went in and wondered

This is as simple as it gets

But I have tinges of regrets

What if  something were to happen

What if the simple went wrong

There are things I haven't done yet

People I love that need to be kept

That when I realized I hadn't lived

I hadn't experienced life the way I was meant to

D’Anna Nicole

Sometimes I have to sit and ponder   When is it that our minds decided change From believing in all the world's wonder To being weighed down by our own chains

D’Anna Nicole

I miss you and I love you I could never forget you The hug we shared and The kisses that showed you cared I don't ever want to know a day Where I can't be with you I know I couldn't ask you to stay So I'll find a way to pull through But it won't be the same Hearing you say my name No it won't be the same And I'm the one to blame How I felt, just wasn't enough And what I said, didn't compare And we chose not to discuss The love we knew we shared So I miss you and I love you I could never forget you But I've been left here and Without you, I'll disappear.

D’Anna Nicole

I see your name and I smile

If only it be for a little while

I can pretend as if I was still with you

As if this weekend we would do what we usually do

But that's not true

When I see your name I want to cry

Because your smile is too far away from mine

I would see you like I normally would

For its just an image on my screen

I have no reason to rhyme

There's no more rhythm in my heart

There's no more song in my soul

It's bleak

And motionless

I deserve nothing less

Than to see you everyday and to hear you say

My name on the tips of your lips

As if it were divine and forbidden

As if when you said it, you would possess me

You never wanted that for me

You always wanted to see me grow

To be the best version of me I could be

But at what cost

Never being with me

Is it good enough for you to know I’m alright

Even though I'll never be truly happy without you

Is it good enough to know that I'm safe

Even though it's not in the security of your arms

It's not enough for me

Tell me I made the right choice again

When most of the time it feels so wrong

Tell me it's for my future and education

When it all feels second to you

Don't regret it

I could try my best not to

But I regret not being with you

I could try my best to make the most of it

But I regret not sharing these moments with you

Was my love not enough?

For you to see it was always you

For you to feel the pain of letting you go

For you to know just how much I wanted you

For you to taste every bittersweet moment we had

Because now you're gone

                     Now I'm gone

                                   It's gone

                                                  And we may never get it back

I see you

I see the disbelief on your face as you see your little brother lifeless on the ground

I hear you

I hear the screams you shouted wishing he'd come back to you

I smell the scent of your cologne still on the shirt you let him borrow

I feel the regret filling your heart knowing they were looking for you

I taste

I taste the darkness filling your heart when you look at his girl and mother this way

I wish

I wish it didn't have to be this way

D’Anna Nicole

I want to be the one to make you happy but you never give me the chance I want to be the one you've always wanted But you leave without a second glance I am here if you want me The truth is I always have been I am here if you are willing To ever try and do this again

D’Anna Nicole

With a bullet in my chest

The cold hard ground becomes my bed

Where I could wake up and restart this day again

And show him how much that I cared

My breath is leaving me

And I can hear the cops running past me

I can hear more shots being fired

And I see his body fall beside me

When I looked into his eyes

I think I saw a glimmer and realized

He didn't want to die

And neither did I

As I lay there

Feeling life leaving my body

I remembered

He asked me for help last September

D’Anna Nicole

Put a smile on your face

And pretend everything is alright

Put on your battle paint

Because we’re fighting a war tonight

D’Anna Nicole

When I think about happiness

I always think of you

Love, is the word you say that makes me happiest

Love, is the only thing I know I feel that is true

You are the reason I am who I am today

Opening up was never easy to do, but so easy with you

Unlike any others, I don't want to go without you even for a day

My life only truly began when you entered it

And through all my ups and downs, you were there for me

Remember our summer, our kisses, our night moonlit

Remember our love, so deep, passionate, and carefree

You say you'll love me always, and I feel the same for you

My life I refuse to live or end without you

Everlasting love is all I'll ever feel, so I have one question for you

?

D’Anna Nicole

Momma you always told me to be careful

And you know I always listened

But them why did this have to happen

I was being safe that night momma, I promise

I didn’t drink a single drop that night

I was walking home the night he forgot what the law is

Momma I didn’t know anything was wrong

Until I smelled the coke and Hennessy

But by then, his headlights were the only thing I could see

D’Anna Nicole

It's plain and simple

It only comes down to this

I love you more than you know

And I just want you to be mine

Only mine

Forever

D’Anna Nicole

Carry me on your shoulders

As if I were your own sweet mockingbird

Carry me in your heart

As if you’ve never had it broken before

Carry me to the mountain top

Let the wind carry you in its wings

Only then can we really be free

Only then can we truly see

Only then can we fully be

The colors of the wind

The strength in the mountain

The love in life

Us

D’Anna Nicole

I was weak when you first came across me

But I became stronger when I was with you

Now I’m without you

And I’m left to wonder

Did you ever want to me with me?

Did you ever truly love me like you say?

Did you ever want want to continue what we had?

They say “if you love something set it free.”

“If they come back, it was always meant to be”

Here I am sitting waiting for you

Are you waiting for me?

D’Anna Nicole

I stand by your side. Even though it hurts me.

I stand by your side even though my heart is shattered.

Your secret admirer whoever could it be?

Why can't you see, all along it was me? I guess it never mattered.

If only you knew how much I love you.

If only you knew that I was there.

If only you knew the way I look at you.

If only you knew how much I care

D’Anna Nicole

Colorless eyes

No teeth

Hard to rise

Can barely breathe

Life's been great to look back on

But then I realize it's almost gone

Mom’s face is fading from my memory

Life is just a cycle, it lives on infinitely

D’Anna Nicole

But I’m rooted in who I am

And like the tree that I’ll become

I will follow the path toward the sun

And if I get intertwined along the way

Well then that’s OK

But right now I’m just a sapling

With the world out there to see

And I’m still grasping

At what I’ll become

And it’s true that I don’t know the outcome

And although you may think those who wander are lost

I disagree, because I believe

It’s not about the destination

It’s about the journey

And while the wheel in the sky keeps turning

I can’t stop believing

No matter how faithfully devoted I was to you

I’m the one that’s crying now

And although you aren’t that far away

I feel like we are worlds apart

And it just keeps getting worse

So maybe

Just maybe

It’s time to go our separate ways

D’Anna Nicole

You want to know what it means for me to love you? It means I can't go a single day without thinking about you at least once. It means that every song I hear some how brings me back to you It means every night I dream of you I dream of all the time we spent with each other I dream of a future we could have together I dream I am laying with you, close to you, hearing each beat of your heart and feeling each of your breaths synchronized with mine It means that every time someone asks me if there is someone in my life, my every fiber begs to scream yes in utter bliss It means I find myself crying some nights because I only ever want to be with you, but you let me go so far away It means that I have lost a part of myself because for me to love you means you own my heart.

D’Anna Nicole

Am I really so unlovable

That I can't even manage

To find a way to love

Myself

D’Ana Nicole

Success and happiness  

The one thing we are all looking for

But what is success and happiness but an idea

A thought

Success is worth more to us than anything imaginable

Some would give up everything to have it

Tale of giving up your born child

Or selling your soul to the devil

But it never seems to be enough

We greed for more

Why?

In the hopes that it'll bring us happiness

But if you are looking for happiness in your success

Will it ever come?

In my experience,

No.

You will constantly try to be more successful

But your happiness

Your true happiness

Will never come

So I urge you

Find it within yourself

Not to find happiness in your success

But instead

Find success in your happiness

Only then can you truly be

Successful

And

Happy

D’Anna Nicole

I've never been someone's first choice

No matter how many time I've cried

No matter how many times I've prayed

I'll always come second to someone else

I just want someone to want to be with me

Is that too much to ask for

Just this once

I want to be first

D’Anna Nicole

She tried to pretend to be content with what she had with him

But she would never be satisfied with a future so grim

Oh, how much she wanted just to be with him somehow

As if she was Juliet pleading, “Wherefore art thou!”

But she knew any and all efforts to tell him this,

How much she wanted to be with him, would be fruitless

Because she was picked to be rooted and moved elsewhere

Too far away from her dear lovers care

He wants her to go, to watch her flourish and grow

She, willing to stay, to be loved by him, her Romeo

D’Anna Nicole

I love you now the way I loved you then. my feelings for you have never changed and my love for you has no end. We've been through a lot, both together and apart, but I've always known it was you from the start. Not a day had gone by that I haven't thought of you and everything we've been through. I'm so happy that no matter what happens between us, I can still earn back your trust. I may not deserve it and I certainly don't deserve you, but I couldn't be happier knowing that you feel the same way too.

D’Anna Nicole

From the minute she felt the wind on her face, she had given up

There was no point in living

No one would miss her, her life was meaningless

So she jumped

From the minute she opened her eyes, she cried

It didn't work, she was alive

Not sure if she was upset or relieved

From the minute she wrote the first word, her spirit was lifted

Transcended from the page to existence

A medium of truth that saved her

From the minute she finished it, she found her savior

Not in an entity of divinity  

But I'm a daemon of writing that was lost

From the minute she found it, she found her reason

To continue, to write, to live

Her writings became her bibles, her truth became her gospel

So she was saved

D’Anna Nicole

The only thing left to say

Is that you left me

Heart broken

D’Anna Nicole  

I want to be with Mars

The truth is I love him

Despite the distance

I want to feel close to him

But we are afraid

Afraid of being together

Of hurting one another

But that doesn't make me

Love him any less

It makes me want him more

You are my Mars

And I'm your Venus

I love you and I think you love me

We are meant to

be together

So why can't we?

D’Anna Nicole

The the thing about being in an emotionally abusive relationship is

You don't know that you are in one until it’s too late

Or maybe you do know, but you refuse to believe

You tell yourself this time it’ll be different

But it never is.

D’Anna Nicole

She will continue to break herself

Until someone learns to stay

And help her put herself back together

Only for her to break again

She's waiting for the one who will stay

No matter how many times she breaks

D’Anna Nicole

I'm not changing myself for you

I refuse to

I'm not changing myself for anyone

I am changing

But I'm changing for me, myself, and I

D’Anna Nicole

I had a dream last night and you were in it

I don't know why I dream about you but I do

It happens quite often so I wonder

Is it because I miss you, because I loved you

Is it maybe because you are thinking about me too

I had a dream last night and you were in it

You were protecting me from things

I didn't know I was afraid of

Was it because you were always trying to protect me

Was it because I let myself misunderstand you

I had a dream last night and you were in it

But no matter how odd the dream was

No matter how much sense it did or did not make

The only question on my mind when I awoke

Was if maybe you still dream of me too

D’Anna Nicole

You've asked me time and time again

When did I realize I loved loved?

What moment? What were we doing?

The thing is, there was no moment.

There wasn't a sudden realization.

Loving you didn't come that easily.

When you found me I was broken.

And I won't lie, I still am.

I built walls around my barbed wire heart

With the sole purpose of keeping you out.

I loved you then and I love you know

Because you didn't let that stop you.

Each brick you tore from my walls

Was a moment I realized I'd love you

For the rest of the life I've been blessed to live

When I first saw you, you loved another girl

But your devotion to her  tore out a stone

The times you let me cry, the times you let me scream until I forgot what it all was for

You tore down my solid wall

When we kissed, when you laughed,

The moments in silence when I looked at you

In those moments when we both knew forever

You obliterated all my defenses

So you could ask me again

Though I doubt you'd give me the chance

But you could ask me a million times

You could ask me until the day I died

When did I first realize I loved you

And my answer will forever be

I have always loved you.

D’Anna Abril

I have been made to feel broken

I have been pushed down

I have been beaten

I have been bruised

And in this case I have been stabbed

In places both domestic and foreign

To my heart and my soul

I have tried to die

I have struggled to live

I have loved

And I have lost

I have felt the happiness of company

I have endured the loneliness of solitude

I have fought for what I believed in

And I have been silenced by my fear

I have had things handed to me

I have had many more taken away

And through all of this, through everything

I have never wanted something more

Than having you by my side

D’Anna Nicole

I don’t let myself love

I don’t let myself say what needs to be said

I want to love a man but I can’t

Because I can’t even love myself.

I’ve never had confidence in who I am

Never told myself I could be better

I’m selfish in my want for self-preservation

I contradict myself constantly

And I do this all without hesitation

Loving myself has been so complicated

I thought it was impossible

If I can’t love myself no one could love me

So I tried to kill myself by the count of three

I put on a mask so no one will see

How damaged I truly am inside

Because I’m afraid they’ll always leave

But it’s time to leave that all behind

Because I deserve to be loved

By myself and others

It may take me a while and I may need help

But you, I promise you

I will make it less complicated to love you.

D’Anna Nicole

We've both become so distant

From who we were when we met

I used to fall to sleep to your heartbeats

Now I can barely remember their rhythm

I don't know if it has been time or distance

Or maybe we’ve just both grown

But I wish it hadn't been so far from each other

I can't help but to remember the time we spent together

Each moment we’ve ever shared

I know things weren't always perfect

But they were always ours

And that love that I felt

That's what I'll never forget

D’Anna Nicole

If you love me

Hold on

Hold on to me

Cause I'm crumbling at your feet

If you love me

Hold on

Hold on to me

Cause I can hardly breathe

If you love me

hold on

Hold on to me

Cause I'm a little unsteady

I'm seconds from fleeing

Can't handle all the screaming

I'm tired of all the weeping

Hold on to me  

Finding no reprieve in dreaming

Cutting just to start feeling

Now I can't stop the bleeding

Hold on to me

If you love me

Hold on

Hold on to me

Cause I feel myself slipping

Hold on to me before I'm gone

D’Anna Nicole

The only thing people

Can never take away

From you is your name.

Each name has its own power

What's yours?

D’Anna Nicole

She cheated on you

She abused you

She hurt you

More than you care to admit

Understandably

You are scared to death

Petrified

To ever let a woman

Into your heart and life like that again

She didn't just break your heart

She crushed your soul

Now it all feels like a dead weight

Buried deep within your chest

But what you don't see is me

That I am here

Burden me with the weight of your world

I gladly carry it upon my shoulders

Let me lift your heart and mend it

Until you are strong enough to do it on your own

Let me love you in all the ways she couldn't

In all of the ways you deserve to be

Just give me the chance to show you

D’Anna Nicole

I was trying to write a poem

About trying to find the perfect man

And how he doesn't exist

But I just couldn't finish it

Because he does

Because he is you

But now I have to write a poem

About trying to find my happiness

Knowing that I can never be with you

The problem is, despite all that

You are still the only man

Capable of convincing me

To name my child after Batman

You are still the only man

Capable of making me

Get tacos in the middle of the night

You are still the only man

Who I'd ever allow to drive

120mph on a highway with me in the car

You are still the only man

Who could make me dependent

On sleeping with someone else

You are still the only man

Who's heartbeat lulled me to sleep

Who's breathing made me feel secure

You are still the only man

I wish I could wake up to everyday

And have movie marathons with

You are still the only man

I could say if asked to marry him

I would unequivocally say yes without regret

You are still the only man

I imagine seeing at the alter

While I walk down the aisle

You are still the only man

I envision have that large family

That we both dreamed of together

I get it now

That because you love me

You feel you have to protect me from you

And that's what love is to you

But you don't get it

It's because I love you

That I can never be happy with any other man

And you can tell me all you want

That I will find better

But the truth is that doesn't matter

Because for the past year

My heart has beat in sync with yours

And I wouldn't have it any other way

And that's what love is to me.

D’Anna Nicole

I have been told my entire life

By family and friends

Social media and movies

That the perfect man

Well he just doesn't exist

But now I'm being told to never settle

For anything less than mr. Right

Well truth be told, they’re probably right

My mr. Right, my perfect man

He probably just doesn't exist

But if he did,

He'd probably be something like this

D’Anna Nicole

Sometimes I wonder why I am here

Or I guess the better question is,

Why am I still here?

Everyone has a past

Some people have had it hard;

Some have had it harder.

But why is it that some people,

They rise from the ashes,

While the others go up in flames?

D’Anna Nicole

Today I was reminded of all the people I've lost

Through death,

through misunderstandings,

through distance.

Today I was reminded of all the pain I've endured

Inflicted on others,

Inflicted by others,

Inflicted on and by myself.

Today I was reminded of all the people I've gained

The children born,

The friends I've met,

The family I've built.

Today I was reminded of all the great experiences

That I have experienced,

That we have experienced,

That's has yet to come.

Today I was reminded that despite all the negative you may see in your life, there's always something positive waiting to happen right behind it.

-D’Anna Nicole

I'm having one of those days

Where I'm finding myself waiting

Pushing people out the door

So that just for a moment

I am alone

And I can cry

Not for any particular reason

But I know they wouldn't understand

If they saw me

They’d want to fix me

But can I be fixed

Can I stop having one of those days

Where I find myself waiting

For everyone to leave

So I am alone

So I can cry

For no particular reason

Will there be a day

When it all just

stops

-D’Anna Nicole

They say mother always knows best

But this time I think she is wrong

It's true that I'm still young momma

But no matter how many times

I repeated that to myself

It doesn't change the fact

That I don't feel young, I feel more matured

It's true that I should enjoy myself momma

But I want to enjoy the finer things in life

Not these pointless parties

Wasting precious moments on Whiskey

I want to be creating my legacy

It's true that I won't find “the one” with one man momma

But I don't want to play the field

I don't want the meaningless one nights stands

I'm tired of wasting my time, my energy, my love

I want more

It's true that I'm too young to settle down now momma

But that doesn't mean I'm not ready to slow down

To find someone to enjoy life with

To find someone who I can eventually marry

To find someone to be the father I want for my kids

I know you don't want me to make your mistakes momma

I know you want better for me

I know you worry about me finding the right man momma

I know we don't have the best track record for men

But I know I can do it

You've always known what's best for me momma

And I've always trusted you and your advice

But this time I need you to trust me

I'll always be your little girl momma

But now I'm grown and

I'm ready to slow down

-D’Anna Nicole

I need you to love me

                    Love me

                             Me

                    Love me

I need to love myself

-D’Anna Nicole