#i don't want all of this toil and loss to build up to some moment that doesn't even feel triumphant

[pocketgalaxies]

thinking about if/how the loss of opal as we know her will affect at all their perception of protecting the gods, especially compounded with fcg's death. when you reunite with someone you've missed so much and all he has to tell you is that his brother was killed by a god and his friend was forcibly surrendered to serve that god in the name of self-protection from predathos. when your best friend found so much hope in their god and went on this journey with you feeling like they were doing the work of a god who helped him find purpose, and all there is to show for it is a pile of scrap metal. how do you reconcile the idea that your mission is to defeat this entity that threatens the gods, when the gods are relentlessly demanding sacrifice and death from the people you love in order to protect themselves. how can you not think for at least a moment that maybe the gods deserve to be destroyed

[oprashaant]

The tea-seller's little boy

On a cold Friday evening, in the month of December, Sudhakar had just opened his small tea-shop. He was running his shop in a small corner on the ever busy East street area from 3 in the afternoon till late evenings. In the morning he would go door to door to deliver milk and cottage cheese.

He was late that day, late by atleast 3 hours. The reason for this was his 6 years old son Raghu. He had been crying inconsolably since last night. The stray puppy that he had brought home just a week ago, had come under the wheels of a car and died. That had shattered him and broke his little heart.

They lived in a one room shanty in a crowded slum but Raghu hardly had any friends. A birth defect had caused him to limp while walking and his friends would tease him everytime they saw him walk because of his funny stance. That would hurt him a lot.

With only a half broken bat and a plastic ball to call a toy Raghu would often play alone. When he was not playing he would stay indoors lost in his thoughts. His mother Savitri would often wonder what a kid so small would deeply think about?

So when that stray puppy followed him home Raghu thought he had found his best friend. The pup too had taken a great liking in him. They called him Sonu. He was all white with scattered black spots all over.

Sonu and Raghu were a bundle of joy together. A true treat for the eyes of his parents. It was like they were made for each other. The little pup wouldn't move from the door when Raghu was out at school. And once back home Sonu would be all over him, licking him all over his face. Sonu's low gruntling noises and Raghu's laughter had filled their home with pure happiness. They had never seen Raghu so happy and that is why Sudhakar and his pregnant wife Savitri too had become very fond of him.

"Raghu we will bring you a new one," Savitri had already told him this a hundred times since morning but he just wouldn't listen.

"Aai, is God angry with me?" he asked between sobs. He was lying on a torn carpet on the uneven floor with his head resting on his mother's lap.

"Why would God ever be angry with such a sweet boy"?

"First he made me limp and now he's taken away Sonu from me".

Sudhakar was choking inside. Savitri too was fighting her tears. Losing Sonu was a huge loss.

"Raghu if you come with me to our shop today, I'll get you 2 new puppies before Sunday".

"2 puppies? Really Baba"? Raghu asked wiping his tears.

"That's a promise".

Raghu jumped with joy.

"I don't think it's a good idea Sudhakar," Savitri said, " you are running late today. Raghu hasn't slept at all. He also has not eaten anything. He will bother you".

"Savitri I just want to give him some change".

"Aai please let me go with baba. I won't trouble him. Give me a glass of milk and 2 biscuits and I will be ready in 5 minutes".

"That's like my boy," Sudhakar said and picked him up in his arms.

Raghu was immediately filled with energy even before he had his milk. Savitri was happily smiling to herself. She knew the reason behind this sudden burst of energy.

"I will also give you your favourite cream roll and an ice-cream when we return", Sudhakar said as he prepared him for a bath.

Sudhakar used to sell tea, coffee, cream rolls, biscuits and cigarettes at his shop. Cold weather always meant good business. That is why he knew the 3 hours that he had lost today would have cost him 500 rupees atleast. It was too much for someone who was always running on a tight budget. His monthly income was almost equaling his expenses which included the room rent, school fees, daily expenses and Savitri's medical bills. He also had to send some money to his old parents back in the village every month. Now that his family was growing he was also thinking about renting a bigger space to stay.

Savitri, even though pregnant, was still slogging as a house maid to help him make ends meet. But he had decided now .He won't allow her to work anymore, no matter what. The lady she worked for made her toil hard even after knowing her condition. She almost slipped once while mopping wet floor.

"I would take up some odd labor jobs after dropping Raghu to school for some extra income," he said to himself as he quickly put the milk vessel, the paper cups and other items in the rented rickshaw. He picked up Raghu in his arms and left for work.

"Take care Savitri, we'll be back by 10," he told her before leaving.

By the time he reached his shop it was already 6.30. He briskly unlocked the door, removed a stool and asked Raghu to sit on it, just outside his shop. Raghu was wearing a half sleeves shirt, an old ill-fitting sweater which Savitri had purchased for Rs 200 from the lady she worked for, shorts and a pair of slippers.

"Late today"? A cobbler, Gopi, who worked on the pavement just next to his shop asked.

Sudhakar had a quick glance at Raghu who was carefully removing the tea cups from the box. He went a little closer to Gopi and told him about the pup. He also requested him to not bring it up in front of Raghu as that would hurt him again.

"Poor boy, no wonder he's looking so sad".

Raghu's eyes were still red from all the crying.

"Hello Raghu," Gopi greeted him animatedly.

"Hello Uncle".

"His face is too stressed for a 6 year old boy, " Gopi said in a concerning tone. "Children his age should laugh all the time and roam worry free. You should do something about this Sudhakar".

"I have promised him 2 puppies before Sunday. That will change things for him".

"I hope he gets all the happiness in the world," Gopi said as he looked at him affectionately. Raghu had by now removed all the cups and placed it on the table.

"You are a very good boy Raghu, you are helping your father".

Raghu could only manage a half smile in reply. He was deeply thinking about something.

Sudhakar had by now set up his shop and was waiting for his first customer impatiently.

"1 coffee," one of his regular customer came at the stall and asked.

"Sure Sir", he replied as he closed his eyes and looked towards the Gods in appreciation for his first customer.

"Why are you late today, I came down twice looking for you".

Sudhakar's tea shop was near a big business complex. Almost everyone from that building came to his shop for their tea and snacks.

"Here's your coffee Sir".

"Thanks".

"Cigarette"?

"Sorry, no cigarette today. My son is here with me," he said pointing towards Raghu.

"Oh.. ok. No problem. You are a great father".

"Thank you Sir".

"I hope you are sending him to a good school".

"Yes Sir, he goes to an English medium school. He is going to study and become a big man one day and not sell tea like me," he replied cheerfully. There was immense hope in his eyes for Raghu and he was proudly smiling all to himself as if he was actually seeing him becoming a big man in the future.

Soon a lot of customers started pouring in and Sudhakar got busy. Raghu was dozing on and off. One moment he would fall asleep and the next he would wake up with a jolt. Sudhakar was wondering if he did the right thing by bringing him to the shop.

Around 9 p.m all the milk was over. So were the other items. Sudhakar was happy that he had made good money. But Raghu was looking sad again.

"What happened Raghu, are you sleepy"?

It seemed he was lost somewhere and he didn't hear it.

"Raghu I am asking you. What happened?" he bent down and asked while playing with his hair.

"Baba, I am missing Sonu". Tears welled up in his little eyes and came running down his cheeks.

Sudhakar was shattered. He himself was close to tears. How can a small innocent boy like him carry such a heavy heart? He couldn't take it anymore. He picked him up in his arms and held him tightly.

But the next moment he quickly gathered himself and put him back on the stool.

"I think you have forgotten about the two puppies that I am going to gift you tomorrow," he said trying to cheer him up.

"But I only want Sonu", he replied with a breaking voice.

"They will be just like Sonu and you can play with them as much as you want. In fact we all will play together."

Sudhakar was sure once he brings those pups home Raghu will be happy again.

"Now sit here and have this cream roll I saved for you. I'll be back in a minute. Don't go anywhere. I am going to the next building to get some water. We clean it up and we'll be on our way back home. Of course with that ice-cream I promised".

"Okay Baba," he replied.

His eyes followed Sudhakar while he crossed the road in the heavy evening traffic and went to the other side. Sudhakar waved at him before disappearing in the basement of the building.

Suddenly there was a sparkle in Raghu's eyes.

"Sonu," he jumped in excitement.

He spotted Sonu right in the middle of the road wagging its tail excitedly at him.

"Sonu," he screamed again.

"What's the matter boy?" Gopi asked.

"Look Uncle, my Sonu has come back".

Raghu was ecstatic and getting impatient.

"Who's Sonu"?

"My pup, my best friend".

"Where is he, I can't see him"?

"There he is in the middle of the road".

Gopi got up to get a better view.

"But I still can't see him".

Raghu saw a speeding SUV at some distance. He panicked. He didn't want to lose him again. He limped as fast as he could to get Sonu to safety.

Gopi watched in horror as the driver of the SUV tried hard to avoid hitting Raghu. But it was too late.

"Baba," he screamed.

A young woman who had come for her evening stroll screamed and fainted at the spot.

Gopi too collapsed on the road.

Even as the horrified crowd tried lifting the wheels of the SUV, Raghu quickly got up , picked up Sonu in his arms and walked off in the direction of a bright ray of light.

Sonu was happily licking his face, while Raghu laughed and kissed him back.

"Look Sonu, I am not limping anymore," he said animatedly.