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sgtjbbhasmyheart · 4 years

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Drunk Texting Is(n’t) Bad for Your Health- Chapter One

Series Summary: Talk about your unconventional meet-cute! Bucky receives a text by mistake requesting he prove he's not Reader's sister. The easy dialogue between Reader and Bucky sparks a natural friendship, but could it lead to more? Bucky still deems himself unworthy of any form of affection or love. Reader is hellbent to prove him wrong. With the help of some (meddling) friends along the way, Bucky may get his happily-ever-after after all.

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Word Count: 2101

Chapter Warning: Bad Language Words, tiny bit of angst

A/N: I started this on AO3 awhile ago. Now that I have a blog dedicated primarily to just Marvel/Bucky, I thought I’d add it here, too. Enjoy!

DO NOT copy or replicate without my permission.

Bucky heard his phone buzz as he was tugging a butter-soft tee over his head. He glanced at the digital clock on the nightstand next to his bed as he worked his arms into their respective holes.

9:36

Steve was long in bed already, so the text most likely wasn’t from him. Sam was on a me me kick-- No, what did he call them? Memes!-- of a disgruntled cat which he swore reminded him of the super soldier. He wouldn’t be surprised if it were him. Or possibly Nat. She picked up the new issue of Guns & Ammo the other day and was sending him pictures of a Mossberg MC1sc 9mm she was drooling over.

Smoothing the body of the shirt over his torso, Bucky ambled over to his bed. He snatched up the phone from the navy blue comforter and flipped it over. To his amazement, the text wasn’t from Sam or Nat. Or even Steve.

(917) 460-5480 work thing boring af. kinda tied one on. might be late meeting you tomorrow

He blinked several times at the message, uncertain how to respond. It was a wrong number, right? Bucky hadn’t made plans with anyone for tomorrow that he could remember. Plus, everyone he knew had the same work thing. And it was rarely boring.

Definitely a wrong number.

He set the phone down near the clock, choosing to ignore the text. Hopefully, whoever this person was, figured out quickly they were texting the wrong number and moved on.

Bucky pulled back the covers before climbing into bed. His body melted into the mattress, muscles relaxing for the first time since breakfast. Training had been non-stop all day today. It felt good to just be, for once.

He grabbed the book he was reading off the nightstand and opened it to the spot he left off. He cleared his mind, as best he could, and concentrated on the words on the page.

A few pages in, his phone vibrated alive again. Another text message.

(917) 460-5480 sis dont be mad youd be drinking too if you had to sit thru one of these business dinners

Bucky sighed. He had hoped his radio silence would have clued this person into their mistake. Wishful thinking. Before he could punch out a reply, another text came through.

(917) 460-5480 timmons is droning on about this new client. kill me now

He quickly typed out a reply:

(917) 308-3117 I think you sent this to me by mistake.

Bucky watched the text indicator pulse as this unknown person worked out their response.

(917) 460-5480 haha very funny sis

Bucky huffed at this person’s disbelief, thumbs working on typing out his next message.

(917) 308-3117 I’m not trying to be funny. I can’t be someone’s sister when I’m a man.

He set the phone down on the nightstand again, hoping this person finally took a hint. He opened his book back up to the current page, taking a deep breath.

The room’s silence was broken again by the loud thrumming of his phone skittering across the surface of the black wood veneer.

(917) 460-5480 how does kevin feel about this so close to the wedding???

(917)460-5480 will you still need a wedding dress or will you just get a tux???

(917) 460-5480 am i still your maid of honor???

Bucky chuckled at this girl (no, young woman) asking the essential questions.

(917) 308-3117 Your sister did not get a sex change. Yes, she will still need a wedding dress. Yes, you are still her maid of honor. Like I said before, wrong number.

An almost immediate reply came through.

(917) 460-5480 prove it

Bucky grew slightly irritated at the insinuation. Why couldn’t she take his word for it? He exhaled loudly through his nose.

(917) 308-3117 How?

A few moments passed before the device juddered in the palm of his large hand.

(917) 460-5480 selfie

Bucky blanched at the request. He could feel the color drain from his face, only to immediately heat with a blush. A selfie? That is the last thing he wanted to do.

Although he’d been exonerated for his crimes as The Winter Soldier, he still knew about the dislike people felt about him as a person, in general. They couldn’t get past the brainwashing or other persona. God knows he still struggled with it.

He couldn’t go broadcasting his face through texts to a stranger. What if she was one of those who didn’t understand he had no say in what he did or what happened to him under Hydra’s control?

What if he ignored the solicitation? He could do that. Maybe even turn off his phone.

She did seem the type to be very persistent until she got what she wanted.

True to form, another text rang through.

(917) 460-5480 i will keep texting until i see your manly face

One corner of his lips quirked higher. Yup, persistent.

He navigated to the camera app on his phone and switched it to selfie mode. He stared at the damp locks falling to his shoulders. His beard would require a trim soon, but it wasn’t scraggly. Luckily, he’d had the hindsight to shave his neckbeard in the shower earlier.

Was he considering this? Some girl says jump, and he asks how high?

He combed metal fingers through his hair, blowing out a breath.

(917) 460-5480 im waiting

Bucky growled at the text, running a hand over his face. “Okay, okay. Give me a second,” he said to his phone. He held it up to head height, half an arm’s length away.

Click!

He previewed the picture, assuring himself it didn’t reveal too much. It was, somehow, off-center, containing a bearded chin and half a smirked mouth, one nostril, and a half-lidded eye.

Before he could talk himself out of it, Bucky pulled the messaging app back up and then sent off the picture. He tossed the phone aside, not wanting to watch the taunting blinking dots as he waited for a reply.

The picture was barely recognizable, but someone like Steve or Nat could tell it was him. It would be okay. No one would know.

His phone vibrated violently near him on the bed. Bucky cautiously plucked the device up, debating whether he wanted to read her reply. What if it said, “Holy shit! You’re The Winter Soldier!”? The hope of this woman thinking he was just some regular guy knotted up his stomach. He didn’t know why he cared so much about whether this stranger thought he was The Soldier or not. He had no control over who believed the lies perpetrated as truth through the media. He could only wish for the best.

He blew out the breath he was holding in and eyed the phone’s screen.

(917) 460-5480 is it fair to say men shouldnt be allowed to have long eyelashes??

Bucky laughed and immediately thought of poor Steve.

(917) 308-3117 You should see my buddy’s. The girls swoon and complain at the same time.

He quickly added to the message thread:

(917) 308-3117 Am I correct to assume you believe I’m a man and not your sister?

The response was swift.

(917) 460-5480 oh shit ur not my sister

(917) 460-5480 this isnt 9173083447?

Bucky laughed again, the tension in his chest slowly unfurling.

(917) 308-3117 Unfortunately for you-- no.

(917) 460-5480 ugh im such an idiot sorry for the shit i said

(917) 308-3117 Don’t worry about it. I had a good laugh at your expense.

(917) 460-5480 oh god now i feel like a bigger ass

Bucky suddenly felt like backpedaling. He hadn’t meant for her to feel bad about her mistake. It was cute in a roundabout way.

(917) 308-3117 Please don’t be embarrassed. It was the highlight of my night.

(917) 460-5480 me forcing u to prove ur a man was the best part of ur night??

Bucky thought for a moment. Was it the best part? The training sessions had become monotonous lately, even with the new agents. The team hadn’t been on any missions in a few weeks, so it was pretty accurate to say he was bored around the compound.

(917) 308-3117 I suppose it was. Work’s been a little slow, and there’s only so much training you can do before it becomes tedious.

(917) 460-5480 training? r u in the military? ooh, r u an athlete??

A laugh bubbled up from his chest. It was comical to see her try to guess his profession. His selfie hadn’t announced who he was to her after all.

(917) 308-3117 Something like that.

(917) 460-5480 so mysterious! r u some assassin who needs to keep his identity secret? is that y ur selfie only showed a quarter of ur face??

He paled at the implication. Maybe she did know and was yanking his chain. How did he block numbers again?

Another text came through from the mystery woman:

(917) 460-5480 not that i mind u have a luscious mouth

Bucky guffawed at the comment as flames rose beneath the skin of his cheeks. He hadn’t remembered blushing this much in such a short amount of time in decades.

(917) 308-3117 How much have you had to drink tonight, doll?

(917) 460-5480 doll?? what r u my grandpa??

He chuckled again. God, he was old enough and then some.

(917) 460-5480 enough to not want to shoot my brains out but not enough to know this dinner isnt a party

(917) 308-3117 Maybe you should get back to your dinner? I don’t want to get you into trouble.

He regretted the text the second he pressed send. Was he trying to get rid of her? No. Or was he looking out for her? This person he knew nothing about. She was more entertaining than the recurring nightmare he’d been having for the last week, that's for sure. He'd cling to this unknown to avoid slipping into that black abyss.

(917) 460-5480 aww does the military-trained assassin athlete mchottie not want to talk with me anymore?? 🙁

(917) 308-3117 No!! I’m honestly concerned you’ll be reprimanded if you pay more attention to your phone than Timmons.

The last thing Bucky needed was to feel more guilt, especially if it was at the expense of someone’s livelihood. His shoulders were already heavy enough.

(917) 460-5480 thats sweet but dont worry ur pretty little head over me timmons wouldnt last a day w/o me

(917) 460-5480 timmons may be the boss but i run that office

He simpered at her swagger. He could only imagine what kind of office she worked in because, again, a total stranger. Did he want to get to know her more, or was this a one and done thing? Would she wake up tomorrow and want to continue the conversation or blow him off for the drunken mistake her first text had been?

Bucky stared at his phone for several more minutes, pondering precisely what he was doing and what his expectations of the night were. It’s not like he was going to meet her in person, right? Was he that delusional? He was an Avenger now. He didn’t get a social life. Not that he had one before but still.

He was startled from his reverie as the phone shook in his hand.

(917) 460-5480 did i scare you away??

(917) 308-3117 No. Just thinking about tomorrow.

(917) 460-5480 shit a military-trained assassin athlete mchottie must have a lot to prepare for mentally ill let u get ur rest

He smiled at the gesture. If only she knew.

(917) 308-3117 Send me a text when you get home. I want to make sure you arrived okay.

(917) 460-5480 such a gentleman! i don’t want to wake u if ur asleep tho

(917) 308-3117 I doubt I’ll be sleeping, but it’ll help ease my mind.

(917) 460-5480 alright ill shoot a text ttfn

(917) 308-3117 ttfn?

(917) 460-5480 ta ta for now god u r a grandpa

(917) 308-3117 Yeah, yeah

Bucky’s mouth split into yet, another grin as he set his phone down once again on the nightstand. He picked up his discarded book and found his place on the page. After a few minutes of re-reading the same paragraph over and over, he slipped the bookmark into the gutter of the book. His mind was too preoccupied with the thought of some random girl in the city at a boring work dinner. He realized he hadn’t stopped smiling since they temporarily said goodbye.

Maybe there was a good chance this conversation would carry into tomorrow.

CHAPTER TWO

#bucky barnes #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x y/n #bucky barnes x you #bucky x reader #bucky x y/n #bucky x you #bucky barnes fanfiction #bucky barnes fanfic #bucky fanfiction #bucky fanfic #fanfiction #fanfic

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wri0thesley · 3 years

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many many anons under the cut bc i didn’t want anyone to feel like i was ignoring them and i wanted to respond to u all! warning for small text too, it was so long i wanted to make it look smaller fgbnjkgkjn

Anonymous asked: NAT... you can write WHATEVER you want! It's your blog, and I hope that rude anons can learn to respect that. I used to be on your blog just for jjba content too, so when you started getting into jjk I was indifferent but eventually you dragged me into jjk so hard!! I already like bnha, so seeing you write for it only made me happier! I hope that you continue to write whatever make YOU happy:) ❤and yes, longer fics certainly doesnt mean it's better, quality over quantity

ahh i’m happy that you are here for all three!! i always feel so accomplished when someone is like ‘your constant screaming made me think about jjk <3′. all three of the fandoms are fairly popular and i tag everything v carefully so i hope people who do use the filtering find that useful!!!

Anonymous asked: Goodness gracious. People really be out there thinking they're entitled to dictating what kind of content you should be making

i think part of it might be that i do take requests so people feel like they have like . . . a certain right to certain kinds of my content? i take requests mostly bc they keep me motivated, i like making content for ppl who cant find what they want bc i’ve Been There, but maybe people think i am a pushover? idk i am just trying to have a good time!!!

Anonymous asked: Hi. I only started following you a few days ago but please ignore that rude anon. People are so fucking entitled towards writers it's insane. I recently had someone throw a fit for "spoiling" something in my fanfic, even though the fic was about a manga-exclusive character, so what did they expect?? Overall I've really enjoyed your writing so random assholes coming to guilt you is just a shitty thing that happens. Keep going with what you wanna do.

ah gosh anon i’m sorry about that :(. i’m always super careful tagging spoilers and stuff but like, if someone clicks on a fic about say, naoya or the steel ball run boys and is mad that i spoil something they havent found out yet . . . yeah thats on them fgbnkjgfkjn

Anonymous asked: That...that anon had the nerve to say "we". The fuck?! No no no anon, YOU'RE the only one talking and you're just talking for yourself, don't you dare try and lump us other anons/followers up with you to make yourself look like you're right. We love you nat and we appreciate you. It's your blog, you're allowed to write about whoever and whatever. This brain dead anon just needs to either go read someone else if they're that salty or write their own stuff if they're that impatient.

gosh i WISH some of my mad anons would just write their own stuff honestly. idk if this anon thought they were talking for everybody but i guess they expected anons to agree with them and not be mad at them. i appreciate u anon ;_;

Anonymous asked: Just want to say that ily and you’re one of the best jojo fanfic writers in my opinion 💗 I don’t think you’re half assing jojo fics and there’s absolutely nothing wrong with you being multi fandom. A lot of jojo blogs have started posting about jjk so it’s not as if you’re the only one. I’m not sure why you get hate like this but I think it’s just because you’re one of the popular writers and that makes people bitter for whatever reason. Keep being you and posting about the things that make you happy 💕

honestly after so long writing for jojo - i’ve written well over 200 jojo reader insert fics - sometimes it feels like i’m retreading stuff, and that’s when i take a break bc i dont wanna half-ass stuff!!! i love all of my fellow jojo friends who are posting about jjk too, i appreciate them <3.

Anonymous asked: Hey my dude, ur writing has really grown since the jojo days and its better and awesome seeing u become happier to branch off and write in different fandoms 🤌🤌 those stupid anons are just boring farts that couldnt be bothered making their own content 😤😤 is it possible to block them to ease ur mind?

hello anon!! i run a statcounter for IPs but it doesnt always work for ppl who access through the tumblr app, i don’t think; a lot of the anon hate i get i just use the ‘block’ option, but last night got to me because i’ve been getting that kind of writer a lot which is . . . a bad look for the jojo fandom who are, as a whole from the ones i’ve interacted with, lovely!!! <3

Anonymous asked: People often forget, the person behind art or writing, is just another regular fan. You deserve to be happy with what you create and we should be thankful you share your talent with us. You also have right to change your main interests, and it's very normal thing. Jojo is one of the MANY things that you write for and all you get from that is a like or share. Its not your job. It's your fun thing to do, in spare time. You haven't betrayed anybody. That person was just rude, selfish and bored.

i am just a person doing my best!!! anime fanfic is one of many interests i have and i already devote a lot of time to it honestly, i love when people tell me they’ve enjoyed something i made bc it makes it feel worthwhile but equally it gets to me a lot when people are rude because i am usually trying my hardest.

Anonymous asked: Bro that jjba anon... the entitlement🤮 Fam, you write whatever you want to write😤 -Saturday

dfnjbkjnkgf i find most fic readers are NOT entitled at all and are just grateful but when they are . . . oof.

Anonymous asked: It's funny how people throw "we got you popular" and they think you start apologize and cry. Your writing and passion made you gain few numbers on a follow counter, nothing more. I think I'm too old for stuff like this, we are nothing more, but +1 on a number scale. You ow us nothing, we ow you nothing. Popular... Funny word. You just write for fun of it, fake scenarios about someone's manga characters. It's not that deep. Have fun and don't listen to people like this. I knew it's not that easy, but they are really not that important as they think they are.

extremely fun fact for people who think ‘popularity’ is important to me: i would 100% rather have 10 people who regularly comment, reblog my fics with tags and interact with me than 100 people who read my fic and either leave a like or simply move on. i think this is true for the VAST MAJORITY of writers tbh. i’m glad that people think i am a ‘popular’ blog (i am not in the grand scheme of things, one of my ex-best friends used to run a kpop reader insert blog with like 30,000 followers) bc it gives me an ego boost lmao, but i really just want people to read and enjoy the stuff i write!!!

Anonymous asked: I followed you a while ago for jojo and when my friends started getting into jjk i was like...eh sounds like work...but now that I see you writing for it I feel really motivated to get into it!!! I really enjoy your writing and I want to be able to read the new stuff too!

ah anon i really hope you like it!!! it’s only one season rn if u wanna watch the anime and there isn’t too much of the manga to catch up on either but it is a lot of fun and it’s nice to be in a fandom that’s like, excited about a new chapter and new plot developments every week!

Anonymous asked: Pls dont reply if u dont want to! <3 I'm not sure if this will be of any help to you or not but this is the kind of thing that often helps me and is the only way I know to try comfort others so I wanted to give it a go~

Now im not gonna say 'dont feel bad pls' bc I know that's not really useful but what I do think is useful is just discussing why that anon and many others feel the need to respond that way. As someone who follows a lot of writing blogs myself and have done for a long time, i've seen my handful of favourite writers come and go for different reasons, lose motivation for a while, gain motivation for a while, go from multi to single fandom, or single fandom to multi. Often times as a reader it can be upsetting when things change but it's also important as a reader to understand that some things aren't in anyone's control, I can't control what my favourite writers become a fan of or lose interest of, I can't control things in their personal lives that may motivate or demotivate them to write, but what I can do is support them as long as they're active, and if they move on to do things i'm no longer interested in or i'm the one that changed interests, rather than being upset that they're evolving to do other things or that they're not evolving with me, I think it's important that I still feel thankful for the works that I enjoyed while we were still on the same page and this is how I personally deal with those negative feelings. I think the anons that lash out at you probably just dont know what to do with themselves, maybe they got attached to your works while you were still only a jjba blog and now that you're evolving they're upset, while I understand how they feel, they're going the completely wrong way about it. I've learned to take these things and turn them into something positive for myself or at least something bittersweet that I can move on from but the anons that lash out at you for whatever reason probably haven't learned this yet. Maybe it's because i've moved on and changed interests a lot myself that I know how these things go for both writers and readers but those anons maybe haven't experienced this as much so they dont know what to do with themselves other than complain that you've changed and throw insults at you in an attempt to get you to revert back. None of this is because of the quality of your writing like they want you to believe, it's literally just because you've evolved and while some of your old followers might not like the new content for no reason other than it not being their cup of tea, it's definitely not regressed at all. You are pumping out a lot of content right now but every single thing i've read has just been better than the last. Things that really stand out to me is how well you get characterisation down to a T and all of your dialogue is just on point and from the pov of a reader I think those things seem the hardest to get right so I am such a huge fan of your stuff at the moment and I can tell you're really putting so much thought and care into each and every fic no matter how fast you're producing it, I think the fact that you're also proud of what you're writing at the moment really shines through as well and I just adore the passion that radiates from every completed request as well as in the responses for the subsequent thirsts resulting from these works that appear in your ask box later (I know i've sent quite a few by now~)

Just to be clear i'm not defending those anons in any way, while I can understand what they might be feeling/why they're reacting in the way they are I still believe it's just so immature to be hateful online point blank. Even during a time where I still got upset with writers if they started doing something else I still never targeted that negativity directly to the writer and sending rude or hateful comments whether on anon or not never something i'd stooped low enough to do even when I still had an immature way of thinking, however, I hope that it might make it a little easier to brush them off if we try and understand what they're really upset about, and that they're just putting the blame for their negative feelings onto the wrong thing rather than coming to terms with change themselves.

hello anon!! i appreciate the long message. i do feel bad for people who have no interest in what i’m currently producing and i get that they feel upset about it; i’ve watched a lot of fellow jojo writers move on completely or just stop posting, honestly. this kind of thing is why i was so intense about asking people if it would be better if i made a separate blog but the resounding answer seemed to be ‘i’m just vibing with whatever happens and i’ll block tags as needed’.

i often return to works by my favourite reader-insert writers who no longer write for the fandoms i like (and i read stuff bc it sounds interesting or i trust the person who writes it), but change can be difficult and i guess at this point i’ve - whether u like me or not lmao - been a fixture in jojo reader-insert tumblr for a While so it’s probably kind of jarring.

anyway i really appreciate you and the nice words! <3

Anonymous asked: hi nat! I just wanted to pop in and say that regardless of what fandom you write for, the love and care you pour into your writing and into interacting with followers who care about your work as well is really obvious. you're doing this for FREE and people should appreciate what you've given us so far, since ultimately this blog should be for you, whatever that means to you at any point in time. it's ok to jump fandoms! the important thing is that you feel good about what you're producing and that it makes you happy. everyone else is just a bonus - but, seeing you on my dash certainly makes me happy : ) I hope you feel better soon!

thank you anon! i’m feeling much better and happier today. birthdays are very difficult for me (i did not think i’d be alive at eighteen, much less 25!) so this event is definitely kind of a way for me to concentrate on something else, and i’m a little bit extra sensitive atm. i appreciate you so much, thank you for the kind words!!! <3

Anonymous asked: Hello! I just wanted to say, write what YOU want and make YOUR writings as long as you'd like. 💖 To the anon who is like "We mAdE yOu FaMoUs dOnt HalF asS iT" stfu, let people do what they wanna do. If you think they half do it, write something better and longer you asshat.

this is an open invitiation to that anon to send me a link to their writing blog and i’ll hype them up i promise <3

Anonymous asked: nat i'm so so sorry about that ask please know that your older followers don't share the same opinion :( sometimes people forget about the living, breathing person behind the screen smh. you are not a machine. you absolutely should not restrict yourself to posting about one fandom forever. yes, we're first pulled in by your amazing content, but we stay for your wonderful personality and work ethic. please just keep being you, taking up projects you feel comfy with! <333 bless u

ahh thank u anon! unfortunately i actually am a writing robot, i’m sorry u had to find out this way. my jojo chip has been removed, please send it back so i can continue to not half-ass my jojo work. fgnjkbgjkfn thank you so much angel!!! i appreciate you ;_;.

Anonymous asked: i don’t think it’s fair for other people to say shit about what you choose to write about because on tumblr and other writing platforms, writers are constantly developing how they write and the fandoms that they write for. it’s not fair for someone to criticize that “you don’t care about jjba blah blah blah” because you can enjoy new shows/manga. and like you said you’ve grown so much!! proud of you nat and im glad that ive been able to read your works (sincerely other nat)

i am STILL waiting for you to come and fight me other nat fgnjkbnf. it’s nice to be enjoying different things! i am constantly learning new things and reading new works and making new friends and improving and i think that’s important. i do care about jjba - a lot! but i can care about other things too! <3

Anonymous asked: I may not be one of your oldest followers, but i've been here for almost 3 years. Yes, i started following u for ur jojo content, but let me tell u, ur newfound motivation and enthusiam for other fandoms was honestly contagiuos for me. And i say this as a person who finds very difficult to move from one interest to another. Jojo is great, but so are other fandoms. Please don't let some faceless scum rob u that motivation. This is ur blog and u r always free to write whatever u want.

honestly, i have been there! i am autistic and i have special interests and watching other people move on to stuff i’m not vibing with has made me sad in the past, but i want people to be happy more than anything and sometimes that means new things and change! <3

Anonymous asked: Hi Nat! I saw that rude anon message & I just wanted to pop in & say that they're wrong. You're not betraying anyone & you should write whatever it is you want to write. I followed you for jojo & I'm not familiar with the other fandoms that you write for, but personally it makes me SO happy to see you enjoying new things! It's always good to find joy wherever you can, so keep writing what you're interested in. There a lot of ppl who want to see you happy and healthy <3

honestly the idea of it being a GRAND BETRAYAL is so funny, i am just writing anime fanfic here and thriving!!! tysm anon! <3

Anonymous asked: Those anons can piss off! They have no right to judge how long or how short your writing is. If they want longer content write it their damn selves. I think your writing has improved wonderfully and I originally followed for Jojo and I'm enjoying all the content period. I don't even watch jujutsu ( not my cup of tea personally) but I love seeing the creativity and the interactions. You write what makes you happy Nat and that's on that! You don't owe anybody anything! I know how hard writing is and when your consuming new content it's hard to make content for something else. That doesn't mean you don't like it any more your just doing something different for a while. Love you and your content and I'm enjoying the love your putting into your content whether long or short. ♥♥💕 Sending love your way!

honestly my idea of ‘short content’ is still over 1k words, i’m not good at reeling myself in! i guess it’s bc they see like, 1.5k jojo fic versus 5k jjk fic but it’s not that i didn’t enjoy the first fic, just that the point and the story came a lot quicker and so did the natural end! thank you anon, i appreciate you ;_;

Anonymous asked: Hello! Just wanted to let your know that I think your writing is awesome, and that you should write for whoever and for whatever you want to! You dont have to stay loyal to one fandom or anything, and your followers shouldn't expect that from you! It's not like they are paying you to write, you are doing this for free, and because you enjoy it and it makes you happy! If they dont like your stuff, they dont have to follow you, they can go to other blogs that cater to their taste, and they definitely don't need to be sending you such hurtful comments, and they dont get to make you feel sad about your writing! Just because they followed you during your earlier stages of writing, doesn't mean you owe them some type of loyalty or compensation! You can write literally whatever you want as long as it makes you happy! That's what your hobby and your blog are for! I hope you know that alot of your followers love your work and think that you are an amazing writer and are down to support the work that makes you happiest! 💖💖

ahh thank you so much anon!!! i am always so bowled over by how many people are nice to me when something like this happens, i am sending you my love <3

Anonymous asked: don’t listen to them!! we love you as a writer no matter what you write, because you’re a good person and a talented writer!! you shouldn’t have to change what you write to please a bitter person, and if they only want jjba, they can go to another blog instead of bringing you down. you’re doing amazing and they should be thankful you grace us with your talents!!

to be totally honest, if i was half-assing or not vibing with content i was making i just. wouldn’t post it. like you’d be able to TELL when i was half-assing stuff just to get words out (source: i have re-read my own nanowrimo works). there are lots of great jjba blogs who could do with more followers n interaction!!! i hope they do find them and i hope they’re nice to them :(.

Anonymous asked: Please don’t pay attention to that anon. People only have that confidence when they have anon turned on. Them looking through your blog despite feeling that way is peak fan behavior and speaks to how addicting your writing is. Naturally, you can’t please everyone and there will be people who are irrational and feel entitled to tell you what to do or what to write no matter what. Trust me when I say they’re a small minority and are more likely probably passing viewers rather than regulars. I check your blog about three or more times a day because I love reading not just your fics but also your takes, banter with other anons, or even random updates. Brainrot posts? LOVE TO SEE IT!!! Desk update? AMAZING!!! With that being said, don’t feel pressured to continue pushing out content for others. Write what makes you happy! You’ve been writing for JJBA for 4 years and it’s completely normal + healthy to get into new media. I’m not sure if it would mean much, but your love for JJK has gotten me excited to start it too!!

anon i really hope you enjoy it!!! sometimes these anons remember stuff i’ve posted and said better than i do tbh, i am living in their heads rent free i guess!

Anonymous asked: I've been following you for a couple of years and honestly it would always be a joy to see when you posted. Your writing has improved and I'm very happy you're enjoying yourself ! I know it hurts hearing and seeing stuff like that but I'm happy you're here. I'm honestly blessed everytime you post. Your writing is phenomenal. I love reading it even if its characters that I dont care for. You capture their essences so well and weave an amazing tale within the prompts and whatnot. You're amazing nat!

wehh thank you so much!!! re: the improvement, i really don’t feel like it has and then i re-read something i wrote when i first started and i’m like oh my god maybe it has. did i really write about jotaro acting like that.

Anonymous asked: Hi Nat. I recently became a follower of yours and I'm really saddened to see you get hate. You seem like a genuinely sweet person with amazing talent! I'm a writer myself and, unfortunately, get the same kind of comments. And when you get those comments, it doesn't leave you feeling motivated. People need to understand that people can and will, at times, grow out of fandoms. (1 Not just that but you're doing all of this for free. Again, I'm sorry you got such a comment. But please know that I'm proud of how far you've come. I'm proud that you're living a life that makes you happy. And no matter what fandom you may find yourself in next, I will always enjoy your writing. Take care of yourself. (2 end

HELLO NEW FOLLOWER I LOVE YOU (i get a lot more a day now than i used to and i feel guilty about not being able to look through so many blogs but i do try and follow back other writers for my fandoms!! ;_;). i’m sorry you get the same kind of comments! i’m always just happy to see people i like enjoying new things, even if i have no interest in it (hello to all of my mutuals who write for hunter x hunter and haikyuu, not interested but i’m sure you’re having a great time and i support you!!!).

Anonymous asked: I'm sure you're getting a barrage of supportive messages now (at least I hope so) but I figured I'd add my voice, because I'm a longtime follower. Your writing is, and always has been, wonderful. I've been so happy to see you and Haz get to a place that works for you both. Idk if it's obvious for everyone, but you seem like you're emotionally in a pretty good place most of the time these days, and it makes me really happy to see that. I followed years ago for JJBA content, but I stayed because regardless of what content you put out, I find your wit delightful. And I'll stick around even if you move fandoms entirely, because whatever content or editorializing you produce is going to be worth reading, regardless of what it's for.

ahh, anon!! thank you for sticking around so long, sorry if you’re old enough to have been around the vore and jorts and spider rohan fiascos! <3 i am definitely a lot more stable than i have been and - barring the Pandemic Related Mental Health Issues - happier! i’m glad that it’s noticeable! <3

Anonymous asked: It actually makes me mad how entitled some people are. Nat, you're not a content creating machine and those who expect you to be are not worth wasting a thought on. Your love for something is not measured in word counts and for you to write every day without getting burned out in the slightest you really must have a burning passion and huge dedication to your craft. If others decide to send hate then allow me to send admiration because I can feel your love and hard work in each post you make!

i try and write every day bc it’s super good for my little ocd/autistic brain to have routines and distract itself, so i’m glad other people can enjoy them because that makes me motivated to carry on! like, i write for myself mostly bc the content i want i sometimes get find, but filling requests and writing for other people also leaves me with happy warm fuzzies too! i appreciate you!! <3

Anonymous asked: If people only care about your writing for the jojo porn that’s on THEM, not you. Your writing was amazing when I followed about a year ago, and it’s only gotten better and will continue to get better! I think it really comes through when you enjoy what you’re writing and it adds a whole other layer of worth to it, because not only are you making free content but you LIKE that content and we can all gush about it together!!! More than just fans, I think you’ve created a community here and we don’t just stick around to read smut, I promise you that. -Reronon

i do miss having a discord community bc it was nice to talk to everyone in real time but it was hard work, i am glad that people feel like they can just come into my askbox and gush! i’m not very friendly in real life and people tend to think i am cold and stuck up so i work very hard to try and seem friendly and approachable online, which is much easier for me because i get to think and re-draft before i type! <3

Anonymous asked: Hi Nat! I’m sure you’re getting a lot of messages like this right now but I just wanted to say for what it’s worth that, as a person who originally followed you for jjba content and hasn’t watched/read any of the other series you’re currently writing for, I’m honestly still along for the ride. This is your blog and you’re allowed to do what you want with it and put out what content you feel like writing. Sometimes??? People acquire new interests??????? Shocking! I know absolutely nothing about jjk or bnha but out of curiosity still read some of your posts about them and even though I might not Get It, I still enjoy them because I think you’re a very talented writer! Honestly, as long as you’re still writing, I’m still down to clown, and whenever you take breaks (which are important!) I’ll still be waiting for your return or supporting and respecting your decision to stay away longer. Don’t let the entitled assholes get you down. Utilize YOUR blog and YOUR space however YOU choose. Your talent and kindness speak for themselves. Love you!!! ❤️❤️❤️

anon i care about you and i am so appreciative of you and everyone for sending me such nice messages! i am running out of ways to say it but it’s true, it really does mean a lot to me ;_; <3

#nat.txt

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procrastinationonvacation · 3 years

Note

Your Lalwen answer was great! I loved it! Would you be up for talking maybe about Curufinrod? (Platonic or romantic, depends on how you see them) If not, please ignore and I’ll send another ask! (I have a lot of things I’d like to ask, if that’s OK)

- Captain Anon

Hi Captain anon!! You bet I would! (fyi im going platonically) and of course it’s ok for you to ask more stuff, seriously youre just enabling me to skip past the internal debates/hole digging that normally come with sharing my thoughts.

If I ever decide to skip an ask, I’ll let u know. That being said exams are coming up for me which means if im actually successful at studying (I wont be) I might not get back to you as quickly :)

Finrod probably sees Curufin like one of those bastard cats who you love very much. Then they swipe a vase off the shelf for the fifth time in a week and like, Finrod knows the noldor are cursed to suffer in life, but is this necessary?? He *just* finished sweeping!! But then when he’s sick his cat wont leave his side, y’all know what I mean, cats give off affectionate Vibes. At the end of the day, even if Curufin pulls a lot of shit, Finrod knows (or thinks he knows) he’s got his back.

Curufin thinks about Finrod the same way I think about the hobbit movies. Does he agree with him? No. Does he love them anyways? Hell yeah, that is HIS dumb ass cousin, line the haters up, Curufin’s got some beheading to do.

(other stuff under cut)

The relationship over time:

Now then, I feel like Curufin first met Finrod through Celegorm. They both are out door adventure types, though Celegorm and Aredhel’s style of out door adventure might have been a little more….muddy… than Finrod would have preferred. So when he meets Curufin, who takes after Celegorm in his love of the outdoors, but would rather a more orderly exploration.

They’re like the two sort-of-friends who end up together because they hate roller coasters and everyone’s at an amusement park.

And I say sort of friends because I imagine that in Valinor, Curufin is rather suspicious of the cousins. He spends most of his time around Feanor, who very much dislikes the *half* family. Not that Feanor blocks his kids from interacting with them, but I think Curufin would absorb at least some of that negativity towards the cousins.

They do end up being pretty close in the end though, I think Fingon rescuing Maedhros made him kinda realize “oh hey they have good attributes too, dont they” but that’s an awkward position, because maybe they’re good people but it’s not like he’s going to tell Them that. He does tell Tyelpe though: the cousins are nice people, people who they should protect, people who’d protect them.

At some point, he and Finrod end up in a “kids who dont like roller coasters but love the park” trip again and I dont see Curufin as the type to say “im sorry” but more of an incredibly awkward “hey im really glad ur here with us. It means a lot to us that you came.” and nice gestures. Finrod gets what he’s trying to do, and even if he wont tell Curufin he forgives him (Finrod wants a formal apology first) he’s wayyy too nice of a person not to be kind right back.

personalities:

Curufin: I think when they were in Valinor and first in Beleriand, Curufin was a pretty decent person, ya know? Sure, he inherited his fathers ambition and pride, but I think he would have been fine if it weren’t for the oath.

—Hi we’re talking about loyalty now. Feel free to skip this. Listen, the best way I can think to describe this is it’s like the love Feanor had for his father and silmarils. Selective, possessive, it wants them to be happy and safe but only with them, only in their way. It’s the same way they wrote the oath, rather twisted and wrong.

I dont think Curufin, or any of the brothers, started out like that. But I think by the late parts of the book, the oath had integrated itself into their thoughts, especially Curufin’s. A lot of them would hate the oath, but I dont think he could bring himself to hate it too. His father wrote it, his father had them swear it, and like I said: loyal.

So I think the oath destroyed him fastest, and his friendship with Finrod got twisted to be that way too.

I really like the version of things where Curufin knows there’s something really wrong with him, but refuses to believe its the oath. And I Especially like the version where he’s relieved when Celebrimbor wont follow them anymore, because he wont be dragged down with them.—

*inhales* ok after that long and off topic tangent. I think Finrod doesn’t really notice the change the oath has affected in Curufin until Beren and Luthien because 1. a bunch of his people just died, 2.he’s always been a little prickly anyways, and 3.Finrod’s probably preoccupied too with Angrod and Aegnor being dead.

Finrod: I think y’all know my take on Finrod but essentially it boils down to: he is a good, competent leader but also a personal disaster. He has my full love and support. Gets emotionally attached to everything. Has probably held a funeral for his potted plant. RIP Mr. Green Leaf (plant not person) you were a good plant.

#again thanks so much for the asks :)#and i hope you have a great day!#and let me know if I should change anything #asks #Captain anon #headcanon

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misterbitches · 3 years

Text

Hello! @flootweed replying to the post from before. the long format was killing me. why does tumblr look like this...

I haven’t watched episode 8 yet...or have I? If it’s the most recent one. No.

Is the hornbill a bird? It probably is but I have a terrible memory and I’m dumb so. I skipped the last few weeks because I’m scawwed. How are you liking it? I did see someone say that the hornbill makes sense (without knowing what it is...at all) bc heart transplant patients only live like 5-15 years after but someone in those comments pointed out that he was so young when he got his and that’s pretty rare so he has a higher likelihood of survival. Frankly, this is the only way I will proceed. Since when did shows ever care about the heart transplant health? Never and it needs to stay that way!

What did we think of ep 6? LMAO. I need opinions! And omg it makes me feel special when I can point things out to people because I so...rarely get to LOL. Editing is like one of my favorite things ever so I can be super particular about it but I try to do the thing you do when you’re supposed to see if it works within its context. I’d like to go in with scissors and glue but alas.

THe mic covering....the rustling....it’s like guys...please. Ironically the audio today wasn’t great. I don’t know why. IDK if you watch c-dramas but I am not even sure what’s worse between them because they dub their dramas. But actually no it’s best to have the dubbing because even tho it is painful they have to put a lot of effort into it. LOL.

Right? @ Aey! It’s just weird if they would show us more about what he’s done instead of saying he’s done sth bad and not even explaining that....like you could even do some shitty exposition. I think if he is to be a true villain then we really need to be privvy. All the warnings make it seem like he’s a fuckin’ serial killer so when we get the scene of him at home it’s like....actually this is really serious? Maybe his pain is like...for a reason. Althought you won’t even TELL US WHAT HE’S DONE WRONG BESIDES BE JUST FUCKING WEIRD AND ANNOYING! So from what we have it’s just a realllllllll fucked up sad person lol. god i forgot about the dinner! and i totally agree. he really needs them to succeed. i like your theory because it would make the scene where he like blocks the twitter user make more sense. he also says they dont really know each other etc so it’s realllllyyyyy probable that he just sees it as a way out. if not then we shall pretend u wrote it :)

god yea i wouldnt say it is art but i also guess we technically have to since it is technically. in the way that technically performance artists are artists but mostly i uh technically ignore them. Also one of my fav BLs is called the best twins. If you do not know what it is I will not elaborate further.t

i want to know more abt poli sci majors lmao but they sound DRAMATIC/ hopefully most ppl in ur cohort arent losers!

hahahha i understand. there was just a thing on twitter about DSA and then the day before about reading discourse. the same thiings. over. and over. and over. and over. we are our own worst enemies but also our own best friends? but i hate tankies and that wont change. but hasan’s a decent guy. he said sth abt black ppl during biden’s primaries in GA or whatever and i was like chill. but he’s insecure and has adhd which means ur more open to being wrong and changing otherwise u will suffocate and die.

and totally about hiding fuck ups. i’ve tried really hard bc of organizing IRL to like...be honest, question, etc but also like...approach it naturally? because if you’re trying to be perfect and so worried you’ll fuck up you don’t realize that puts more stress on you, makes you seem like a robot, and could potentially not make you realize the mistkaes you made. also if we’re privileged in certain spaces there is just no possible way we won’t get something wrong. im light and i know that honestly any way to speak up on colorism is going to be difficult and that’s a space where i have power so i just have to figure it out. we should be uncomfortable because we have to sit with unpleasant feelings and sort through our own whatever. that just makes the next time even better and people can trust u more. i think some people sweat it sooo much or maybe they think their personal life and what theyve been through is more the norm? on the other hand people can be sf reactionary in the worst way and idk what their issue is. there was also a user who said sth very inch arresting about tankies which i thoroughly enjoyed (how like violent lefitsts or tankies / ppl who are like ooh a gun whatever just want to be violent in another space so they have shit tendencies from jump and nothing of substance which i think i agree with tbh fo ra lottttt of ppl. like their anger is actually like “no im about to beat that ass” instead of what we actually want to get done)

sort of in the same vein re: taking it easy...we coudl all be more understanding too. to slow it down like you mentioned about not being privvy to fucking eveyrthing and saying anything on our mind. i saw this person talk about y2k which was a huge deal while happening bc it was the turn of the millenium (bruh were u even alive?) but this twitter user grew up in a super super SUPER religious household and was like why do ppl make jokes about Y2K it was insanely traumatizing? though my first instinct was confused ive tried hard to like look more before i judge especially thanks to a friend of mine. turns out that with the further reading the more we found out he was just really traumatized; it was very common in religious households to be afraid of 2000. so we could have come at him with no understanding and he could have thought that everyone had the same experience with that year that he did. his feelings sit precedent though but i think it was just very hard for him to fathom.

i didnt reply bc he didnt need that and what could i have said? he’ll see what the truth is with exposure and unfortunately this was something he really did go through.

and that’s what makes most people think others could be over the top. because it sounded ridiculous but then it was this huge traumatic thing that we could have never known about. so maybe when someone sounds like actually crazy they have an explanation? of course some ppl are just batshit or annoying but that’s anywhere not just leftists it’ just means more i guess when a ~~librul is annoyed~ but it can be easy to want to make fun of ppl too. lmao. basically what i am saying is the internet? especially twitter? for leftists? in this economy? bitch it’s the wild west out here.

i am 29! idk if i said it or not. i am OLD u probably werent even born in the year i was talking about wah. i know not old-old or old at all but compared to you i’m due for a colonoscopy.

omg i hope u can get vaxxed soon! are you wfh rn? i hope ur also not in a bad state as in state state not state as in ur being :| bleh what a fucking time. it sucks that you have to fucking do work. well unless u like school. which i hope u do. i just assume everyone hates it cos i did lmao

was it the lindsay ellis drama? that bitch is dumb. if there was other drama oh wait the drama i was referring to it all happened on the same day. idk book twitter that well but i saw something from someone who was abt that shit and wowie! the american people are not that.....intelligent to put it lightly.

i’ll get better. ppl tell me they miss me and im like aw. i have insanellllyyy bad insomnia and a lot of stuff happened this year HOWEVER I SLEPT FOR TWO DAYS FOR 8 HOURS AT A REASONABLE TIME. im a new woman. anyways you too! i hope ur not too burnt out with school. we just dont know when the burnout is or we just dont know we are burnt out until we are. the panaramiciccici hit and all the things i was ignoring kind of just fell on me and sooo much happened at once. and frankly it’s hard to take care of ourselves. lord.

Like if you aren’t interested in expanding on the issue in a way that hasn’t been done before all you gotta do it like… spread resources and donate if you can. I dont see the point in having to say something about every issue especially if you (not at you specifically just in general) aren’t immediately impacted by the issue. Like is the 14 yr old white marxist named sarah on twitter really gonna have meaningful insight on anti-asian violence ?

this is part of why i cannot telecommunicate. i dont want to do shit on the internet. i am able bodied so i know that this time has been of such ease for other people. but mentally i just can’t. i don’t have a comment on hand like that and i hvae no desire to engage with ppl that way. i am a super super super solitary person but thats bc it’s MY time so when it’s like all this effort with other people i dont ever want to be alone. it’s the same with the way i approach filmmaking. it isnt a sole thing so i hate it not together. that’s part of how u can get so sucked in and repeat doom scrolling. i was in this webinar last may after [redacted] and this black woman prof said “read with a community and talk” because otherwise she said we are torturing ourselves. you can’t carry that weight all on your own. unfortunately i hate zoom, discord, slack, signal, whatsapp, facetime. you name it this panera has made it evi.. L

you make a really excellent point. i think the young young gen zers are really really just interesting because it’s like this whole new world for them with leftist politics and they just can’t grasp the horrors of the world and the kind of freedom being a leftist can bring. and so many people don’t grow out of it. those people so happen to be the “least productive” in terms of how much time they spend IRL withe these issues. naturally, younger kids are gonna have a harder time. they are not as mobile as well so the internet becomes this place. but then it’s this echo chamber. and many times just things posted without sources. and social media NEEDS that to exist.

i think of the irony of leftist kids on tik tok and while i am happy it’s reaching them it’s just....different. very different. the growth of social media is so good but also so fucking sad, it’s too much! i think the point about not writing everything is major. even i have to do this which is part of the disappearing.y ou need to detach and make sure your head is on straight again. but when you think eveyrone has to be privvy to every thought and you can’t just sit back....which twitter and social media doesn’t encourage. you have to join in. that’s often why when i have something to say it is dense because i don’t feel like repeating it. ever. lmao ust ever. i cant pay attn. social media is a fucking minefield for my brain u can get so lost in it and absorb it but once u start talking you may not be able to stop.

i think a big part of that is it not being a leisurely thing but sort of just in our lives always. this sounds like a grandpa rant but ykwim. We dont have to see the same thing over and over again. And eventually it gets sincerely diluted or its diluted bc of capitalism or whatever. Or if theyre very young or maybe they don’t have like the greatest way of sharing the knowledge? then it can be butchered. I hope this is making sense...i’m talking beyoond the boring surface-level milquetoast shit. i see really ahistorical stuff on there from leftists (like this thing about NK + africa and it being a beneficial rship as opposed to a um not beneficial one. and it isn’t. beneficial but this young black girl was talking abt it and noname rtd and i was like it’s just too complex. there’s no good/bad here just bc it’s not america. dont get me started on this.)

but Lol that was kinda off topic but I think what I meant in my last reply about not turning off the voice in my head is about when I consume media, not necessarily when I’m online talking about. Even if I have criticism for something, I’m usually pretty chill when consuming fandom content bc I think being serious online all the time is kinda boring. Like sometimes I’m analyzing theme and shit but really most of the time im memeing.

exactly.........gotta laugh. thats why sometimes im like i cant think lmao. unfrotunately i have been ARGUING with ppl on the internet for rly no reason when i could have replied to ur very nice fun wholesome message. i love torture. i miss memes.

“ i think the people who get the least enjoyment out of that are those so obsessed with getting upset with anyone thinking outside of their lines as if it equates to them “ EXACTLYYYYY

kekekekeke im glad u got it. it’s like with conservatives throwing around snowflake. now im beginning to question who the real complainers are.

LMAO exactlyyyy. i posted a screenshot of this writer from twitter saying that exact thing. Like first of all, I’m...an adult? and if you are as well uh? i’m sorry for you but are we 12? But how is it affecting u this viscerally? And if it does why dont u...do...research? pihgofuaipoajghou but honestly everything u said. we’re trained to go into it with nothing. i was only around ur age when i started to get more serious about this stuff but you’re like lightyears ahead of where i was at 21. did i say this but i’m in iww and literally i can tell u in 2016 i did not think 2019 me would be in a union bc i told my friend in a train station that we don’t need unions. i was 23...but the thing is i didnt know what i was talking about. at all. and i knew i didnt know and she knew i didnt know and now i am the clown.

also yes at critical engagement. i had to learn so much through experience and this is tuff that i coudlnt be shielded from. there’s an empathy you kinda have to develop and this understanding that you move through the world as this person who is “nowhere and everywhere; nothing and everything” so i’ve always had to think about things differently just to survive. that’s also what can drag a lot of people towards it like theres so many black kpop fans bc i think a lot of the pain in SK can be mirrored (sort of) through our history. and theres currently a history now but it had to be forged. uh what was my point oh yea however i wouldnt have been able to move further if i didnt have my background to go off of bc i knew something was off when i started getting into all these things (ill give u a hint) but if i had no prior knowledge and didnt have to think about it then the critical approach is either stale or stupid.

i had to research but i dont understand how ppl are so bold with little to no research and understanding? thhey just inherently know with also like ZERO experience in what they need experience in. engaging critically means “how i see the world” with dashes of trying to be open adn understanding or whatever. actually that’s another thing like being afraid of criticizing things bc theyre foreign to you so u give it a pass (like we discussed) but it doesnt hAVE TO BEEEE JUST REAAAAAD and then take all the info ur teensy brain and apply it. be a normal human being and dont be fucking rude and racist. thats it! u can complain abt literally anything without being a dick.

as we start with LW and end with LW.....what do we think (i asked this already) omg please share wbl thoughts i THINK i know what ur talking about. well it could be two things; their rship when they came back and the physicality and then pei shou yi. i almost dont even want to use my brain to fucking look at that. i think wbl can get away with more bc of visual~*~*~* reasons (like literally, the look of the show. there’s more space to get lost in the frames. many thai dramas are a lot more literal? this isn’t the right word but it’s very heavily character focused particularly bc of $ i think) though good production also underscores flaws so i am also wrong. but like do u know what i mean? u have to kinda focus on it? or maybe it’s just cos like.....ur so used to it in thai bl idek. i’ve seen tw bl ofc.

look i swear i will justify this forever bc there are some things we miss right but if u feel like someone’s a bad actor....theyre bad. it’s about tone movement etc etc etc and since most thai bl productions have 0 interest in that....well. they take these newbies and put them in these situations. we dont understand thai but if we see them and we’re like “wow this is really bad” then they’re bad lmao. IDC i will never be like cos idk what theyre saying NO WHY HE LOOK LIKE A ROBOT???????? DOES HE EMOTE? why is he CRYING WITH NO TEARS? and it’s not even a total requisite to cry with tears(i mean for me it is) but it’s just like what is happening on ur face right now young man????????

painful.

the inflection stuff is very valid ooh good point tho but that’s only a part of the piece. plus we get used to the way they communicate. like the ppl from sotus were prtty bad. i dont like that show but thats an ex of ppl liing the actors and the person i thought was better other ppl dont think that? well apparently hes a shitty guy but. um. so when theres decent acting its so glaring.

although i must say even tho i dont care for 2gether anymore and would never like to be reminded about its existence (only bc i just cringe lol) i honestly....didnt think bright was a bad actor? but people keep saying he is and i am much more inclined to believe them than myself. though i am not often dickmatized that could have been it. until he opened his mouth and ruined it and then i stopped paying attn.

although honestly i’m so much more critical than i could be positive. i have ben stumped for the last day about how i wasnt mad at his acting in the show. is it me? is it him? who’s......the wrong one.....(me)

oh shit they have been denied? i haven’t been paying attn to whats been going on recently. i just got into it on MDL because of snowdrop. sometimes i literally cannot engage bc ill just be like alright well im black so this power button in my head is going off when ppl talk abt that shit. back in the day when kpop jawns were saying some real outta pocket anti black shit (now everyone is slick with it) it’d always be THEY DONT HAVE GOOGLE THEYVE NEVER SEEN A BLACK PERSON but really it’s like no...maybe they are just racist? that’s ok too.

also the past 2 weeks have been um atrocious bc how fucking easily people fell into the pit of white supremacy and started to turn their ire towards black people and making a competition between our groups just like they wanted. it’s not about the women who are dead anymore, who were sex workers, their womanhood, being asian, being poor anymore. it’s about how much black people get attention and why people only pay attn to us. i am not feeling very generous this week for ppl to excuse that hsit.

on a lighter note, ppl say that abt the whole husband and wife thing. i dont know how to explain how angry that shit makes me but maybe it’s because i do not want to think of my body in relation to a fucking penis at all hours of the day. if bls could kindly not do that it would be nice lmao

yes there are a lot of those. who are only there to gawk lmao. and just idk worship bc of the cult of personality thing bc of how weird and open they have to be as actors. some of the others are people who /think/ theyre really smart (i think im asmart but i also think i am very dumb and i have adhd to prove that MEDICALLY!!!) but are actually not? or their observations arent great? or idk if they are they arent interesting? but i think well..........we have more refined palettes :P

jk also theres just different personalities. you and i mesh more bc we have a lot of the same beliefs and are coming from the same place. that makes it easier to understand as well. i really try to remember that but some people are really weird so. again just...the perception of certain things even down to acting skills. but i also dont like.......believe this genre can really do anything at all. on one hand i want them to do it right bc it’s a piece of work so they should. be proud of it. cos most things arent advancing us bc representation and culturalism are a lie bla bla. it’s just that when the depictions are negative or not done well it adds to the problem as opposed to the things that are well done are fairly benign and can’t really pull us back (perf example is the black panther film. i woudl definitely not say it was transgressive as a literal work but visually it��s just stunning. and it’s sad that it’s stunning and surprising but still with basically an all black cast of mostly dark people abd like what it means in the zeitgeist yes. it’s also just a good movie. but it’s still imperialist prop and unfortunately and this is fucking pathetic to say it “opened eyes” in other countries where they hate black ppl and ignore their own racialized minorities HENNYWAYSSSS a better ex is moonlight except moonlight isnt mainstream and is indie tho...still thru a funnel of capital bc a24 but who cares bleed the fuckers dry is my motto. my point is moonlight is both a great work and doesnt bring any failures to the table and its existence helps in ways outside of art but they arent the defining things giving us material advancement sooooo i mean it’s complex (this is my conclusion to everything um guys it’s complex)

er i had one more point in conjunction to above. oh yea so i like dont need all these extra things to make it progressive. like people really want more women in the show and i am honestly like i really dont. i dont want them to actively do this. if they cant do it naturally then let someone else do it. i am not asking for more bc i dont want it from them. when something comes along i embrace it but i do not see why women should be represented when the genre RELIES on patriarchy. there is no complete satisfying existence for the women in these series. i dont want it. i dont ask people to show us~*~* or respect~* like fuck no the people who make it make it and hopefully more will make it in the future but i will not beg bc THEY DONT WANT TO DO IT SO WOULD FORCING IT MAKE IT BETTER? just fucking leave them out entirely. that’s the answer if theyre gonna make nasty female characters then those bitches can geaux. we have other plcaes to be. booked. and. BUSY!

2 notes · View notes

echy-hexi · 5 years

Text

Me:You let a pyro have a match... What did you think she was going to do? Just light her cigarette?

My dad, almost having his eyebrows singed off:Yes

Me:...I'm disappointed

My dad:As you should be.

///

King:hey I gots a question

Me:Nani?

King:What happens when a girl takes a penis enlargement pill?

Me:...I- what?

///

Me:You're too sober Faith, go get a beer.

///

JJ:Bruh why the fuck are the staff at this funeral home crying?

Celo:Because they work at a fucking funeral home

King:But they should be used to it

Me:No mom

JJ:Yea but you'd think they'd be desensitized to it.

Me:they're paid to cry

Celo:People have emotions unlike you. Not everyone is an emotionless piece of shit.

King:Sympathy

JJ:I'm not an emotionless piece of shit, you're confusing me with Faith

Me:lmao

///

JJ:It looks like Satan's cock

Me:Wtf

Celo:It does

Me:How would you kn-... Nvm

King:Satan, did you just send a dick pic? [Context:They all call me "Satan"]

Me:No wtf

JJ:Trap

King:Don't lie

Fai:oh

Me:I'm literally bleeding from my twat and you assume I just sent a dick pic

King:TF is a twat?

Celo:Pussy

King:o

Me:I regret life decisions

///

JJ:Lei are these still your notes for us?

"My brother said he is a explosive potato"

"Oofity scoop"

"I mad I wasted 4 years at LCA"

"ok listen here failed abortion im tired of trying to be nice so fuck off you ugly lonely ugly cunt and good night"

"Drink coffee it doesn't stunt ur growth although u don't have growth"

"lmao I got kicked out of 2 friend groups bc i said tiddies in Japanese"

"This is why you're not allowed to have a kid"

///

JJ:Isen wants to speak to your manager lmfao

///

Me:We're great friends here at Chaotic Evil™ the Group Chat HQ

JJ:Move I'm gay

Fai:Oh great

Me:We know

///

Masky:I don't know JJ I just want to kill someone so I can eat *vibrates eyes*

Me:o h l o r d

Me:gEt ThE hOlY wAtEr MoThErFuCkErS

Masky:NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Masky:NOT THAT!

JJ:*sprays with holy water*

Me:XD

Masky:NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

JJ:*spritz spritz bitch*

///

JJ:Everytime somebody says some dumbass shit I have a split decision between saying: "fuckin pardon?" or "come again *****??"

Fai:Why not both

Fai:Mix them together

JJ:Pardon again *****? Fuckin come again??

///

JJ:Anyway I'll be sleeping w multiple soft n fluffy pillows like the trashy hoe i am and y'all will just have to deal, g'night

///

Me:My sister wants to send a bird and some grass to China

///

Fai:i'll just stab him in the dick. No more kids for you buddy

///

Me:Reasons I don't need to discuss you butt taco

///

Jeffo:That goddamn bever exposed my twitter

///

JJ:Don't fuck rachel gardner tf y'all are both underage

///

Celo:Concern is futile

///

Su:You're literally talking to someone who read Danny x Rachel fanfiction at 5 in the morning

///

King:How y'all doing

Fai:Dying

///

Me:*recites the entire script of "history of the entire world, i guess" in chat*

///

JJ:YOU CAN'T TALK ABOUT ANYBODY BEING A BOTTOM CELO

JJ:I PUSHED YOU AND YOU LITERALLY FUCKING MOANED

Su:w o a h t h e r e

///

Me:"My parents are going to beat me" kinky

///

Me:Last year:King being accused of raping JJ

///

Me:ur mum gae

///

Me:SHE WAS LOOKING AT LEVI'S DICK-

Su:And I oop-

Fai:Stop. Halt. Halt. Stop.

///

Me:EVERYONE IS GAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

Fai:No lei

King:Nope

Me:GO BACK TO YOUR CLOSET

///

Me:lets rape africa

Fai:lets not???

Me:they scrambled to see who could rape africa the fastest

///

Me:let's blame the maine on spain

///

JJ:Cactus dildo

///

Me:the holes just appear over night and magically get white stuff in them-

Fai:Alright

Su:I-

///

Me:FBI OPEN UP MOTHERFUCKERS

///

Me:michigan's a 4-year-old basic moody bitch wearing crocs and socks drinking some fucking starbucks and breaking down in the corner of america while everyone else gets high and drunk af and ignores him to cry. except ohio

ohio is michigan's not alone buddy

///

Me:kim kardashian is a boy?

///

Me:levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith

Fai:halt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halt

///

Me:all i heard was big. what-

Fai:don't worry bout it

///

JJ:You ask your broke ass friends if they have money

///

Me:my sister has a girlfriend apparently-

Fai:Her hand

Me:no

King:Jeffo

Fai:ye

Me:This chick she met in a game

JJ:When's the wedding

Me:Lmao

///

"You can't legally stab children"

"Not on purpose anyways"

///

Me:TIL my dad's boss lives near Jeffo and my sister's into punky skaters

JJ:TODAY I LEARNED THAT CELO'S MOM KNOWS MY MOM WHAT THE FUCK

Me:so kids what lesson did we learn

Fai/JJ:Nothing

JJ:Jynx

Fai:This is horrible

///

Celo:unholy tutu screeching intensifies

///

Me:im seriously crying by saying "im a weiner dog"

Me:i am the weiner dog

Me:the holy weiner dog

Su:w h e e z e

Me:im the all-mighty weiner dog

Celo:I can't breathe

Su:c r y i n g

Celo:And I'm ashamed

Me:im crying-

Me:im not

Me:im probably contact-high

///

Su:The question is not are you choking, its what are you choking on?

///

JJ:"Go jerk off to your fictional waifus, you horny fucking weeb"

///

JJ:I speak English not oui oui baguette motherfucker

///

King:i just had a flashback of when Destiny Powell started to have nicknames and called Nini tater tot.

King:then christoff just yelled, TATER TOT SHE'S A THOT

JJ:I don't remember Destiny saying that but i definitely remember Christoff saying that

///

Me:hi and welcome to college! you want fresh air? WELL IT CANT FUCKIN HAPPEN! BECAUSE WE'RE TOO AFRAID YOU'RE GONNA COMMIT SUICIDE! SO THIS IS ALL YA GET. A SMALL CRACK IN THE WINDOW!

///

Me:i enjoy the fact that none of us can actually bother correcting shit after sending unless someone points it out or we notice and it pisses us off.

///

Me:i read that as "my new seat in meth is great"

///

JJ:stop flirting some of us are trying to spill some tea

///

Celo:Squidward thicc af 😏

Me:I- Cel why-

Cel:Aren't you the bitch that likes fell

Me:fuck you dont use this to your advantedge

///

Cel:Also, how does that explain why Skyler doesn't even have a dick

///

Me, using something from Tumblr:

Cel:There's a fight going on down the block. Wanna go see?

JJ:What-

Lei:Wh- what the fuck- why?

Fai throws Jeffo and Kint down the hallway to their right yelling “FUCK YOU!"

Sounds of things smashing

Lei:I could use some air and time out of the house. Sure why not-

Est:Take me with you I've been stuck in here for *counting on fingers* 50 years-

Lei:You're only 21-

Est:It only looks like I'm 21

Lei:What the fuck-

---

JJ:Did Cal just tell me he loves me for the first time?

Lei:Yes.

JJ:And did I just do finger guns back?

Lei:Yes. Yes you did.

---

Cel:Hello-

Fai, grabbing through the bars:*Starts to choke him*

Lei: Faith! Faith! Hold on let him explain!

Fai:He’s selling us out!

Lei:Let. Him. Explain.

Cel:*Coughs* Thank you, Leila.

Cel:I’m selling you out.

Lei:*Angry screaming*

Cel:*Choking noises*

---

Cel:Why are you smiling?

Jeffi:Can’t I just smile? Maybe something good happened and I’m happy!

JJ:Faith tripped and fell in the parking lot.

King:Did she die?

JJ:No

///

Me:you force fed me pizza when i was a baby i remember the future

///

Me:all these quotes from the internet, family members, or friends. then there's "ahem You can't be bisexual if you're sansexual. You get to live with this information now, bye"

///

Some random discord shit

2 notes · View notes

citrus-feline · 6 years

Text

good ideas for society dont work cuz there are people who will take advantage of the goodness in other people’s hearts. thats why i want to live on a small island with people who won’t be shitty and destroy everything through their selfishness. the problem of these concepts isn’t the concept itself but the people who take advantage of it. things would be so much easier if people were just nice and thought about others instead of just themselves. but that can’t work because of how so many people aren’t that way. the reason it goes to shit is because awful people do awful things knowing full well they are awful!!! its not a flaw of the concept its a flaw in the people involved!!! thats why we cant be fucking accepting of every single idea we hear. some go waaay too fucking far and that needs to be shut down or whomp whomp our government formed for peace and freedom is now taken over by shit heads calling for genocide. when ppl give communism shit i just wonder if they think that the problem is the thing itself. cuz most do. people think communism is evil and disgusting. thru like all of high school all i heard about it was “it looks good on paper but not in practice” okay? but why?? why can’t that translation be made? the answer is... SHITTY PEOPLE!!!!!! EVERYTHING WOULD BE BETTER IF THEY DIDN’T BE SHITTY BUT WOAH THERE THEY GO!!!!!!!! stuff goes to shit in history with that kinda thing because the original intentions for equality and fairness is kicked down by someone who can’t fathom being nice to anyone ever and cant stand the idea of being equal to others. people who go grabbing at power like that in a society where there isn’t SUPPOSED to be power are shitty, awful, disgusting people who ruin the entire concept. we should just go back to having villages, man. that’s so much easier to handle. you got big ass societies like this fuck hole and you can’t keep track of fucking anyone unless u r the big bad gobernment owo!!!!

theres too many fuckin people in every given place, dude. look at chicago. and even in such a dense place the contrast in people is so fucking noticeable. like homeless people out in the freezing cold begging for food money a block down from where a big ass fancy apartment building is that is sooo rich that it plays on that “futuristic” “totally clean” aesthetic. man fuck that. fuck that so much. some ppl confuse me so fuckin much with how they can’t fathom equality. how they are scared of it. how they think that the younger generations of today starting to move in that direction shows how “evil” they are. no! fuck off!! that’s the exact opposite of the intentions here!!!! is it so bad to want everyone to have a home and food on the table every night?!?! if u really feel the need to be better than others then cool good for fuckin you yknow how you do that? idk fuckin save up ur money to buy a cool car or something. fuckin whatever. as long as there arent people on the fucking streets and people going without food or healthcare. why is that such a fucking crazy concept to some of yall!!!!! humans are supposed to be kindhearted and look out for each other but so many of us have lost that to this competitive and toxic society we grew up in!!!!!!! just fuckin think about what it would be like to be in someone else’s shoes for a sec! like idk about u but i ask people in similar situations like me what they would do if they suddenly won the lottery and got tons of money and the answer 98% of the time is “help provide for people i care about and make their lives livable.” kind people exist dude!!! we are all fuckin here! rich people take advantage of others, if they acknowledge it or not!! the system is bent and twisted so they can get to that completely different life style compared to everyone else!!! that shouldnt be a thing! that shouldnt be celebrated!!! even with the “good ones” that donate money, they are still fuckin up there. so it doesn’t maaatter. having differences in wages can be fine if its small differences and even the ppl at the bottom are able to live safely but thats not how it is rn. if those “good” rich ppl care sooo much about people in poverty rn then why are they still rich?? like im not even fucking kidding rn if i won the lottery or some shit i would try to provide a nice home for me and my boyfriend and it would be humble and comfy and enough that we wouldnt have to worry. the rest would go in savings and go to people who need it. the concept of so much excess money is so fucking stupid to me. savings are important but that isn’t savings thats sitting on a resource that people would kill each other for just so you can feel better than others. “look at all this money i have!!! oh? am i going to use it for anything? well. some things. but mostly just having it so i feel better than everyone else”

augh

its annoying dude

i literally had a convo with my brother yesterday and he said his goal in life is to be able to provide for his family. that is so fucking kind and sweet?? he works two jobs and i dont really see him much cuz he works so much. and that’s his thoughts when he’s working. he has a tendency to blow things out of proportion and have expectations way too high and yet despite that he still has this capacity to be a kind person. hmm. perhaps thats how all people should be??? everyone should have room for kindness in their hearts even with differences in personality??? like why is it so stupid for me to say that!!! “oh niko ur ignoring how the real world is ooohhh ur just making things seem worse by wanting the best” FUCK OFF!!! i want the best for people because i think humanity has a capacity to be kind and help each other!!! yeah i obviously cant do fuckin anything about that with how i am rn cuz i have like $20 in my savings rn but come the fuck on!!! dude! why am i a radical for thinking people deserve things???? why am i suddenly a bad person for saying that i think people should be equal? like of course its not that easy for yall it has to become a long ass conversation about how im shitty because blah blah blah and in history blah blah blah okay but bitch!! you aren’t LISTENING to me!!! humans are creatures with needs!!! if we are a society the goal should be to meet those needs!!! i shouldnt be fucking scared of my government!!! i shouldnt be fucking scared of the system that is supposed to protect me!! and yet i am cuz i feel like im just a number to them!!!! that’s all i fuckin feel like i am!! i try to be a kind person and im not sure why im given so much shit for that!!! everyone deserves food and water and a home!!!!! why is that so weird to say?! im just frustrated how people can think that! im a bad person for wanting people to be better off?? okay???? but... how? because my ideals are similar to an outline that hasnt worked in the past due to BAD PEOPLE taking ADVANTAGE of the kindness that others give? wow! doesn’t really fuckin sound like its MY problem!!! sounds like its the shitty people who are the problem!!!!!!

>:/

1 note · View note

jizzlesdreams · 5 years

Text

June 24, 2019

Aight this dream was fucking insane

It started off with me being at home and i kept getting my hair dyed different colors. And one was like black and yellow tips at the bottom but it was fringes. Super fucking weird and i kept looking in the mirror ans was like meh. Then the next day, i got my hair a wack color (like yellow at one part then dark blue another part then yellow then blue) and i was supposed to take a pic bur i hated it and i was telling mama i nees to go to the store and just get my reddish dark brown hair that i have because im taking a class picture

Anyway, we drive and she drops me off at this stop because apparenrly i had to go see metro (metro station. The band from like 2010 who were playing at the metro)

And i get to the train stop and i try to gps where i gotta go and my data wasnt working. Im supposed to go see the show with kristen too ans i knew she was on her way. So im going around the whole station, asking people to use their phone but they all dont have unlimited data so im like fuck i feel bad so i eventually find a computer and i go on there and go on messenger, google maps, and i also kept going on somw pokemon show that kwpt poppinf up and blasting in the whole station. Super fucking weird. Anyway, some dudes were in front of me and we all start talking and google maps had a bug so it wasnt working so i kept typing in the computer and i asked these dudes and was like what was that older gps site that we used in the 2000s? I gotta legit write down the directions on my hand cuz idk where to go. So im brainstorming the name and im like space quest! So they were like oh the game/show? So im like fuk but it was mapquest so i found the directions and i eventually leave and go to the show (also all of the ppl at the station thought i was tryna take the metra and not go to the metro so thats why they were all confused on what i was doing)

I get to the show, shit was lit. I ended up leaving and i was with jake and we were at some fancy place and i was wearing some nice dress and he was all dressed up and looking gooooood af😍. We run into people we knew but he knew them better and they were all with their parents and were stuck up and cray rich. But they loved jake ans they said we should go join them and i wasnt about it cuz i wanted to go home with jake cuz the concert then rhe dinner shit was a lot. But jake seemed kinda abour it so im like ya we can go fuck it. But the moms ans the girls were like mmmm you shouls go home and change but what jake is wearing is good. So im like im legit in a nice dress and its nicer than the rest of you hoes here. Ans they were kike u shoukd go home and chanhe cuz ur dress is too short and u arent wearing heels and jm like well i dont have anything else on campus. Fucking alsk one od the girls legit wore a dress and her boob was just out ans everyone had cheap ass looking dresses so im like u guys got me fucked. So jake saw how this got awk so he grabbed my hand and we both were saying bye and i was using my super friendly i fucking hate you but u dont know i hate you voice to them when we said bye

Shit was so wack. Anyway, jake and i leave and i remember ranting to him saying how im so glad im not like one of those stuck up hoes again cuz i dealt with being like that the rest of my life etc etc. We later end up being with sara, dan and antonio and we all gotta go take the train. Jake disappears rn but im with the other 3 ans im wjth sara and we try going up to the station but rhese two guys are at the top and try asking sara for money, she ignores and keeps going. Then i was behind sara and these guys ask me but block my path so im like yo wtf i legit dont have money so let me through or else ill fight you. Ans these dudes laugh and were like we'll fuckinf fight and im like aight well i got back up down there (antonio ans dan were turning the corner to come up the stairs). Then they just laughed or some shit and didnt think dantonio were with me

Anyway, instead of the train, we had to walk in this huge open park field and fucking shit was scary asl. It was packed with homeless people who had cray diseases and all of their skins were fucked up and they all kept asking for money and i felt awful but jesus i was v scared and i legit didnt even have money on me. But shit was scary as fuck, they were all walking around like zombies or if they even had the plague.

We ended up dipping out of this "park" but it turned out to be a fucking supermarket in some sketchy neighborhood and i was with jake again when we got out but these guys who were the greeters ans held the door were doing that shit for us ans i saw someone tip something to them ans then i saw one of the dudes was one of the guys back from the train station when i needed help and he did help but just misheard me and we were friends or whatever so i saw him and gave him $2 and he acted as if he didnt know me (turns out he didnt want to talk cuz he was embarrassed he worked there).

Anyway, jake and i end up back at my place and i think i was drunk as fuck so i pass out right away and i wake up hungover ish and just tired af. I go and see jake and i see hes on his phone and looking at someone's stories and it all sounds familiar and turns out it was my story and i was taking hella vids when i was at the train station talkinf to those people (oh ya after the train, i only had 45% so that was wack) BUT I DIDNT SAVE OR GET ANY VIDEOS FROM THE CONCERT and i was pissed af

Anyway, im in bed with jake and we start making out loads cuz we havent seen each other in a hot min. And it was like cray passionate and super intense and we were just all over each other and i remember one part i was just crazy sucking his dick and i was deep throating it and had his balls in my mouth (lmfao i guess thats my dream to do but l m a o) and shit was just wild cuz i wouldnt stop cray sucking his dick. But then my mouth got dry so i had to slowly stop

Then i thought, damn i wonder what time it is (like the actual real time. Not dream time) cuz my alarm already went off at 8 am so..fuck

So i woke up and here i am awake lol.

0 notes

blackrupee · 7 years

Note

Wow your life sounds complicated right now I'm sorry for that. So you aren't gonna have any managers what the fuck? And OH MY GOD I hate when people come in to eat so close to close!!!! ( I work @ zaxbys) if someone is acting passive aggressive I would act even more passive aggressive- make that bitch regret it- regarding the 2 guys: 2 guys is better than no guys:))) wish the first one didn't pressure you though. How did the 2nd one hurt you? - and I care so don't worry about boring me

hi hello would you like to read a novel on my life thanks i talk too much (tldrs at end)

nah like.. we had been managing with a general manager and 3 assistant managers even though we really need 4 so as not to overwork anyone. we recently hired a new one from a corporate arbys (we’re franchised) and two just quit. like i mentioned, theyre not coming back even though the original plan was that their new jobs would be only temporary (6 weeks). sooooo now we have a general manager who only works weekday day shifts, one assistant manager who is relatively new (she had been working at this place for a while but was promoted to manager 6ish months ago) and another who is brand new but still has some experience. they said theyre looking to promote from within initially, but they might have to hire outside people if no suitable potential manager is picked. id love to get manager pay and its not like managers do anything hard so id be WILLING to be a manager..like the whole reason why i got trained on backline was because we have such a big turnover rate with backline people since it fucking SUCKS and i was wanting to be helpful and flexible. so like. thats what i offerred. but one assistant manager was like “lmao all youd do is swear at the customers” and im like bitch when have i ever?? i talk shit about them all the time but ive only sworn IN FRONT OF a customer twice and neither time was it directed at them. but i mean im sitting on a small handful of customer complaints so its not like the gm would even consider me probably. idk dude. i can be nice if you pay me to be nice. but i get paid to do food and do it fast……….so

but yeah literallyyyyyyyyy i have no idea how people can be so??? inconsiderate???? and they dont??? care??? im learning that my contant frustration with people in my personal interactions is due to a disconnect between what i value in expectations and what actually happens. like. when i go somewhere i already KNOW what i want, so i say it quickly and competently. i preface a lot of my interactions with people im requesting food or services from with “i’m sorry but…”. i phrase things as “could i get” as opposed to “get me” or “i want” which sound HELLA rude tbh. id always have my money ready at the window or the register, im always trying to pay attention and not miss anything or just….be rude in any way bc i know fast food fucking sucks. i know some of the people i interact with probably hate their job as much as i do and i want to be the smallest burden i can be. and it seems like nearly no one else has these same values???? and i dont understand how people can just??? be? so? inconsiderate?

also yes bitch im the queen of passive aggression. literally the night before i was working a short shift and my friend was closing frontline and this bitch was closing drivethrough. i just got the okay to clock out and i was like “bye! have a beautiful night! just know that i love you so much and ive everything ive ever said has always been fake until this point! never meant anything ive ever said until now especially if your name starts with k or ends with ristin (drivethrough girl/the one whos being so difficult is named kristin) but just know that i love you!” and basically being really dramatic and extra as satire.

i guess for context the whole reason she decided to be mad at me was the other night when she was drunk and was like “do you even likeeeeeee meeee i feel like you hateeeee meeee wahh wahh wahhhh” even though im like…..yes bitch i enjoy your company? i joke/use hyperbole/satire/irony/whatever a lot but like occasionally id be like “ey yo you know its all jokes right u know i love u right” just to ensure that she knows but she fucking. ignores it all. i feel like she so desperately WANTS me to hate her and tbh i got fucking sick and tired of hearing her complain all the time about this shit! i fucking hate repeating myself! so sure. if you want me to hate you so fucking much there. i hate you. i fucking hate you so fucking much. like is that what you want to hear? is that validating? are you fucking happy?

its so fucking frustrating

but i will not be held accountable for her decision to be upset. because thats what it is. she wants to be upset, and she wants me to be responsible for it when its literally not my responsibility. i am absolutely not going to stand for this shit like i kind of want to say its emotional abuse lmaooo but im just so fucking sick of it.

everyone knows that i take chicken tenders and turnovers that would be thrown out at the end of the night and she was closing frontline yesterday and made a point to throw out the turnovers right next to me without asking if i wanted any/leaving any for me. i mean i completely expected her to be that petty of a bitch so it was kind of funny tbhonestly. also im p sure she unfollowed me here lmaoo

with regards to the guys and this paragraph could get a bit tmi/nsfw: yeah the first one kind of sucked but i feel like a little bit of the New Person Nerves have worn down so id do better if we were to hookup again. because like i totally would love to have fucked him but…..anxiety. he was hot tho. like 10/10 body and ass holy shit. plus he complimented me on my ass eating so (assuming that was genuine and not a vapid ego boost haha paranoia am i right) hopefully he comes back for seconds.

second guy ive had a longish history with. started talking to him at the beginning of last fall semester and we hooked up kinda regularly for about a month. things fell apart, we both understood that we wouldn’t be good dating wise but still enjoyed meaningless cuddles. whatever. it got to a point where he would only hit me up like once every month and a half or so and towards like january-ish he hits me up again. so im like nice cool lets chill. im getting ready for this but my phone is in the other room. while im doing this he drove by my place to pick me up (since he was on his way back from nashville), didnt get a response to an “im here” text (bc i was busy and tbh not expecting him to do that), and left. he lives within like walking distance tho so im like “?? sorry i was busy are you still out or should i walk over?“ and he texts me like “sorry hold up a thing just happened” and im like…….okay. so im just.. waiting around for him. periodically texting like “hey are we good for tonight and whats going on?” because like there was some drama with his friend? hes like.. apologizing and shit but this goes on for an hour. BUT. the ENTIRE time he’s dealing with this friend problem or whatever he’s literally on grindr. and at the end of this hour im like in full blown paranoia panic mode and i literally text him something mentioning this and he BLOCKS ME ON GRINDR so im like ??????!!!!??? and i text him (all while saying “not to be crazy or paranoid bc im probably coming off that way but like could i get an answer or something??”) AND HE LITERALLY SAYS HE DELETED HIS GRINDR. but thats a LIE because i have a secondary account to see like……if guys are still on grindr/if a thing with a guy might turn into something more like if i see he’s not on grindr as much?? thats prob incredibly stalkerish and probably really creepy but hey. thats me. so i KNOW he lied to me but i cant really say “hey ur a liar” without disclosing this weird creepy stalker part of me (funnily enough this isnt the first time a guy has lied to me and i caught it with my secondary account! so it proves to have some function use in the end. not totally crazy). so. yeah. that was the incident. after this i dont trust him at all, and i still dont, but i had it in my mind to like somehow get him to fall in love with me just so i could break his heart for doing this? never really worked out. so now im at the point where im like….eh he’s a piece of shit and i hate him but ill cuddle with him bc it feels good

back to nsfw/tmi: the sex was okay. he’s weird about people being near his like….dick and stuff because he was raped and i totally get it bc i was too but he was comfortable enough for me to finger him and my finger still hurts from where he clenched when he came lmaoooooo. was totally hot tho. and i got to east his ass so im like eyyyyyyyy. its been so long since ive eaten ass so having it two consecutive nights in a row has been cathartic.

tldr; we have 2 assisant managers and a gm rn. looking for more

tldr; bitch. same.

tldr; he’s a liar

#also anon ilusm i love the attention and you god bless

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