#i even cut my hair like her when I was 19 lmao (i didnt end up looking like her I ended up looking like Willy Wonka)

[valkaryah]

[purple-verse]

Extremely detailed character sheet for Randall

Template found here

Character Chart

Character’s full name: Randall Gaspar Purpura

Reason or meaning of name: My characters tend to name themselves. When I first designed Randall the name just kinda echoed in my head.

Character’s nickname: I call him Rand. NEVER RANDY. dont do that please.

Reason for nickname: Randall is a long name lmao

Birth date: 12/13/73

Physical appearance

Age:  23

How old does he/she appear: i think Randall looks a lot younger and could probably be mistaken for 17-19. he definitely gets carded whenever buying anything adult.

Weight: 95-100 pounds

Height: 5′3″

Body build: Emaciated but with wide hip bones

Shape of face: rounded heart shape?

Eye color: brown

Glasses or contacts: he needs to wear glasses, but can’t find them.

Skin tone: pale yellowish tan with lots of freckles

Distinguishing marks: freckles, rope burn scars on neck, wrists and ankles, deep scars all over body. he has a tattoo in the middle of his back of an eye

Predominant features: biiiiig nose and shark teeth

Hair color: black with a purple sheen (mostly because of grease)

Type of hair: super curly and fluffy if clean, straight with slight curls when dirty

Hairstyle: usually shoulder length and choppy, but sometimes cuts it shorter or grows it longer.

Voice: i always wanted him to sound like Danny Elfman, but I do his voice acting.

Overall attractiveness: not very. I’d give him a 4 outta 10 maybe? higher if you like weird looking guys

Physical disabilities: ulcers, anemia, jaundice, chipped teeth, scoliosis, a mild muscle twitch and migraines

Usual fashion of dress: over sized sweaters (usually striped), black skinny cut jeans, black converse, knee high socks.

Favorite outfit: blue striped sweater, acid washed grey/black jeans, black low top converse, periwinkle knee high socks.

Jewelry or accessories: he sometimes wears a black necklace with an eye that matches his tattoo design and he wears a small black hoop earring in his right ear.

Personality

Good personality traits: He’s rather smart and clever, he gives pretty good advice, hes very loyal and will go out of his way to do whatever he can for friends.

Bad personality traits: He has anger issues, night terrors, delusions, gets VERY possessive of people he likes, can get violent, has violent alters he can’t control.

Mood character is most often in: if on meds hes usually in a dissociative calm state. off his meds hes quite irritable unless he’s smoking.

Sense of humor: he’ll tell corny jokes or puns sometimes, but has a hard time picking up when others joke with him.

Character’s greatest joy in life: eating pizza while watching a romcom and listening to his favorite music.

Character’s greatest fear: being yelled at

Why? bad childhood

What single event would most throw this character’s life into complete turmoil? uuuuh? i guess going off his meds didnt go great coupled with a new friend and having a crush on someone.

Character is most at ease when: listening to his headphones and writing

Most ill at ease when: people are yelling at him or he has a lot to do in a day

Enraged when: woken up badly, when he thinks the people around him hate him or are ignoring him

Depressed or sad when: being ignored or nothings on tv

Priorities: just getting through life

Life philosophy: reincarnation might be real and he hopes itll be better next time

If granted one wish, it would be: not being ill and finding love

Why? it causes most of his turmoil and its really hard for him and he just wants to be loved like he never was

Character’s soft spot: people being nice to him, being asked about his hyper fixations (hes usually too shy at first to talk much, but if he trusts you and you get him going he doesnt shut up)

Is this soft spot obvious to others? YES

Greatest strength: he has a lot of surprising physical strength (it wouldnt look like it), he has a pretty strong will too all things considered

Greatest vulnerability or weakness: his own mind, overthinking, moths (the guy)

Biggest regret: he missed his chance with someone he was really close to before he went to the hospital (Leon)

Minor regret: burning his pizza in fall of 1992

Biggest accomplishment: he used to write and actually wrote some small short stories that were published in magazines

Minor accomplishment: not burning his pizza in the winter of 1993

Past failures he/she would be embarrassed to have people know about: he was removed from school a lot growing up til he was expelled and “homeschooled” (it was just him reading all the curriculum himself).

Why? because its embarrassing to him

Character’s darkest secret: he keeps clothing and (if theyre killed) body parts of people hes infatuated with

Does anyone else know? mya does now

Past

Hometown: LA, California

Type of childhood: very badly neglected and abused

Pets: he had a cat as a child, but they died in an unfortunate accident and it really affected him. his plushie cat was name after her.

First memory: his mom yelling at him

Most important childhood memory: getting his plushie cat

Why: it was his number one comfort item. he still has it but shes really old and worn so he keeps it under his pillow or in his dresser

Childhood hero: he didnt have one

Dream job: when he was little wanted to be a vet, then when he got older he wanted to be an artist, now he wants to be a writer

Education: in and out of elementary, half of middle school and then self homeschooled on his own.

Religion: agnostic

Finances: very very poor

Present

Current location: [REDACTED FOR FUTURE GAMES]

Currently living with: he lived alone til he died

Pets: n/a

Religion: agnostic

Occupation: n/a

Finances: n/a

Family

Mother: Paloma Purpura

Relationship with her: very bad. She was extremely abusive to him in physical and mental ways. Randall was an accident and she blamed him for “ruining her life”. She was a severe alcoholic and would leave him home alone for days at a time sometimes. She had schizophrenia and would take out delusions on him. Moths waited til she was passed out and set the house on fire, using cigarettes to make it appear as an accident.

Father: Byun Ji-hwan

Relationship with him: He died while Paloma was 7 months pregnant with him. He got in a car accident. Paloma loved him a lot and his death made her spiral into a depression, most likely being a big factor in Randall being born premature and with many health problems.

Siblings: he’s an only child.

Spouse: He was in love with his neighbor and only friend, Leon, but he moved away and he never told him how he felt.

He was also briefly involved with his boss, Mort, at the pizzeria. He stalked him and was obsessed with him, but lost touch after he went to the hospital.

He had a crush on his neighbor, Tom, who Moths murdered and kept in his bathtub til mya stopped him.

Other important family members: He has an aunt and uncle on his mothers side who adopted him when his house burned down. They were mentally abusive to him and would have to tie him to his bed when he had night terrors cause he would hurt himself and others otherwise. thats why he has rope burn scars on his wrists and ankles.

Favorites

Color: Red and Blue

Least favorite color: yellow

Music: he listens to a lot of different genres, anything floaty and dreamy or kind of weird. his favorite band is radiohead, he also loves oingo boingo and the talking heads.

Food: pizza. pizza anything, he loves all pizza stuff. he hates burgers though.

Literature: horror novels

Form of entertainment: he likes to watch infomercials on TV

Mode of transportation: he has a purple Ford Escort. he keeps losing the keys so he tends to walk everywhere. does NOT ride the bus if he can help it

Most prized possession: His plushie cat, Shadow.

Habits

Hobbies: watching tv or doodling/writing

Plays a musical instrument? he cant play any instrument, but he likes to sing

Plays a sport? no one would play sports with him as a kid and he doesnt have the stamina, but he enjoys watching winter sports.

How he/she would spend a rainy day: He’d open the window so he can listen to the rain and just relax or write

Spending habits: he barely has enough money to get by as it is, but he likes to buy gas station pizza or candy when he can. sometimes he’ll treat himself if hes really depressed and by some silly little toy or something

Smokes: started smoking at 14, chain smoked until he worked and was irritable alot because the breaks werent enough and then he quit after staying in the hospital. Moths still smokes and Randall will have one if he gets really stressed.

Drinks: Used to drink when he was 16, doesnt like how it makes him feel. Triggers memories of his mom.

Other drugs: experimented with lots of drugs as a teen. tried pills, speed and weed. Stopped doing drugs after 2 years., never did them to excess, just to deal with PSTD.

What does he/she do too much of? drinks a lot of soda and caffeinated beverages.

What does he/she do too little of? eating anything. he tends to forget or is just not up for it.

Extremely skilled at: is actually a really good shot with a gun, surprisingly even without his glasses. hes also really good at rhythm type things

Extremely unskilled at: anything involving other people

Nervous tics: chews on his shirt, picks at his nails or bites his nails, covers his face with his sleeves

Usual body posture: slouches, puts his hands up to his chest with his sleeves covering them. tends to walk fast when in public to get home as fast as possible. (virgin walk)

Mannerisms: shy, twitchy, sweaty, has a stutter when nervous. tends not to be able to make eye contact and looks down or away mostly

Traits

Optimist or pessimist? very pessimistic

Introvert or extrovert? EXTREME introvert

Daredevil or cautious?  cautious (moths is a daredevil with no impulse control)

Logical or emotional? tries to be logical usually, but ends up becoming emotional

Disorderly and messy or methodical and neat? it really depends on what. his self care is messy, but his living space is usually kept pretty clean and minimalist, except for maybe some food wrappers but he picks them up weekly.

Prefers working or relaxing? likes relaxing, but working gets his mind off things.

Confident or unsure of himself/herself? very very unsure of himself

Animal lover? yes, loves all animal esp bugs, rabbits and rats or any creature hated by most people (he relates)

Self-perception

How he/she feels about himself/herself: hes very self loathing and takes what happened to him personally, feeling like he did something to deserve. that carried on to adulthood and now when something bad happens on accident he thinks he must have done something to deserve it. he finds himself very unattractive and has a hard time looking in the mirror. hates everything about himself.

One word the character would use to describe self:  bad

What does the character consider his/her best personality trait? he doesnt think he has any

What does the character consider his/her worst personality trait? shyness

What does the character consider his/her best physical characteristic? eyes

What does the character consider his/her worst physical characteristic? scars

How does the character think others perceive him/her: he thinks people see him as a gross person, someone you wouldnt want to go near. and smelly.

What would the character most like to change about himself/herself: everything

Relationships with others

Opinion of other people in general: scary and would rather be alone, but wants love and friends

Does the character hide his/her true opinions and emotions from others? absolutely

Person character most hates: his mother, his aunt and uncle and tom

Best friend(s): mya and leon

Love interest(s): leon and sort of tom (it wasnt really reciprocated so hes dead)

Person character goes to for advice: mya

Person character feels responsible for or takes care of: himself

Person character feels shy or awkward around: everyone

Person character openly admires: mya (he likes how outgoing and nice she is)

Person character secretly admires:  mya

Most important person in character’s life before story starts: leon

After story starts: mya

[botls]

seeing hadestown 9/29/19 - part one

under the cut is my take on act one of hadestown after seeing it. i didnt really do a play by play of what’s happening in every scene so this is kind of assuming that you have some previous knowledge of the show and focuses on on the cast and the little things they were doing. part 2 here. meeting the cast. meeting tlt cast. if you have more questions or are curious about anything else PLEASE come and ask me in my inbox or messages i could talk about this show for the rest of my life

road to hell:

andre came out and it was AMAZING he held the last note of road to hell for what felt like eight years and it was incredible and for the entire time eurydice and orpheus were STARING at each other with the most perfect awestruck looks on their faces and it was such an incredible shot i was like 🤧 already

during the music part eurydice and the fates all mimicked drumming against the drum box thing at the same time it was Cute

any way the wind blows:

when eurydice lit her candle and the third fate blew it out she whipped her head around to look at the fate who just kind of shook her head innocently like “it wasn’t me” and when eurydice turned back around to light it again she just smiled and shook her head at the crowd like “don’t blame me”

this happens a few times but for the first time at the beginning of this song the fates walk towards orpheus aggressively and he gets so scared and runs back and ouch the metaphor for him being afraid of his fate......no thank you

come home with me:

come home with me was so fucking cute reeve was ADORABLE

this entire song was Fantastic for like half of it orpheus and eurydice are sitting together on the table and orpheus’ little paper flower is so genuinely awful it’s kind of sad ajhsgsvska but it was cute they showed him working very hard on it over on the side of the stage

when eurydice says “oooh he’s crazy” it leaned MUCH more heavily on the side of “i get it now this man is legally insane why are we letting him walk around amongst us” with a much longer pause that included an intense stare between eurydice and hermes that made it even funnier than the obcr

the oh a liar and a player too line genuinely caused me to ascend its better in person than you could ever imagine genuinely out of this world and orpheus sounded SO nervous when he rushed out “ohnoimnotlikethat”

wedding song:

every time reeve or eva sang the word “trees” they like thrusted their hands up violently and so did the ensemble and it was so cute and funny and the part where the table comes up behind eva was so funny and different from london it was just kind of pushed up behind her and it seemed to startle eurydice and as she leaned back she just kind of had this “whatever i’ll go with it” face on but she was Alarmed lmao

eurydice was pushed by so many tables in this song omfg

i wanted to voice record it so bad but i kept forgetting bc i didn’t want to miss A Single Thing but this was the first song where i was really really like “i wish i had recorded this” eva’s voice was chefs kiss mwah and at one part where she sang table her voice was like. palpable and she was like rubbing her hands all over a table it was heavenly

after orpheus gives her the flower in this song she legitimately doesn’t let go of it for almost the entire first act like id always assumed that she put it in her hair or her pocket but she seriously clutches it like a lifeline for a significant part of the first act it was 🥺

epic 1:

it was so stunning nobody ever warned me that wedding song ended with orpheus on his knees and hermes was like interrogating orpheus about his song while orpheus was like holding on to eurydice to not fall bc he was awkwardly balanced and i honestly think that was just reeve and eva being reeve and eva and not being orphydice and it was so cute

the whole company follows orpheus with this song like wherever he walks or turns the whole company is turned towards him paying Attention

livin it up on top:

when persephone comes down with her bouquet of flowers she tosses them over her shoulder and timothy caught them and he looked so happy he spun around in one foot and smiled so wide at the audience before setting them down on the side it was precious

at the beginning of livin it up on top persephone gives eurydice her flask and eurydice smiles really wide and nods at persephone but when persephone turns around she just looks stressed like “wtf should i do with this now”

eurydice gets up and goes right to the side of persephone while persephone is singing and she looks like she’s waiting for something and you kind of assume that it’s to give back persephone’s flask but when persephone finally turns to her at the end of the verse eurydice rushes forward with the biggest smile and presents persephone with orpheus’ flower and persephone smiles so wide and takes it from her and puts it in her hair and it’s the first time eurydice doesn’t have the flower in her hand since she first got it and it’s such a tender and precious moment

right after putting the flower in her hair persephone put her arm around eurydice and when persephone said “some may say the weather ain’t the way it used to be” she turned to face eurydice and gave her a Pointed Look and eurydice literally turned to the audience and made this 😬 exact face i was peeing

when persephone was leaving the balcony she hugged hades from behind and kissed him on his cheek and then as she was leaving he sort of lifted his hand in a mini wave and she gave him the MOST disgusted look ever and waved her hand in what i can only describe as a “fuck off and go to hell” gesture

during orpheus’ toast everyone is pretty much on the platform aside from eurydice who is right in the middle of the stage beaming at him

at one part timothy picks up eva and literally like. throws her i was like eva is flying high rn omfg he literally made it look like she weighed nothing she probably doesn’t but like.

i was wow she does this in real life at one part and i felt so blessed to witness it

all i’ve ever known:

during the intro they are staring at each other and persephone walks to each of them and puts a comforting hand on them like a mom it was Soft

the all i’ve ever known choreo was softer in person than you would ever imagine

the part where eurydice is leaning back and it looks like orpheus is holding her? that we’ve all been talking about lately? this part? they actually start on opposite sides of the stage and eurydice starts to do The Lean and orpheus halls ass and RUNS to catch her before she falls it’s so cute

the whole time for eurydice’s verse orpheus keeps trying to hold her but she keeps him at arms distance and steps back every time she says “alone” or “lonely” but when she moves into the “but now i wanna told you part” she holds him SO tight she was like first grabbing his nonexistent boobs so hard that he was backing up then his suspenders then clutching his arms and finally his hands

during eurydice’s parts the background stage lighting is a soft purpley/pink and for orpheus’ it’s a vibrant blue and then when they sing together it’s a beautiful mix of both

the just music choreo part was magical eva did the lift kick and it was majestic in person she is a Wonder

after when they’re laying down you see them holding hands and the way she sits up literally?? looks like they’re laying in bed having the conversation it’s ?? captivating strangely

after eurydice sits up orpheus comes up to hug her from behind and there is this lovely gif set from it and she holds him so tight and it really is one of the softest parts of the whole show my heart was beating triple speed because eurydice really seems on the verge of tears and orpheus just HOLDS her

way down hadestown:

they are The Most Couple couple ever first of all. after all i’ve ever known they make out for like eight years i was like????? reeva needs to calm down

persephone’s dance was just as amazing in person as you’d imagine

her dress is SO vibrant in person like. the coloring in this show is so fantastic with eurydice and hades wearing the same color and persephone standing out with her green and orpheus’ clothes are more white than the ensemble’s so it stands out wonderfully

eurydice and orpheus got interrupted while making out by being scared to death by persephone yelling at them about hadestown it was so funny

eurydice goes to dance on the platform and she tries to get orpheus to come with her but he’s reluctant so she just pats his stool instead so he sits and she dances in front of him/talks to him/touches his arms and hair it’s adorable

during the pregnant pause when orpheus did his little move in front of eurydice thing he LEPT like a gazelle and landed on one foot that made such a SOUND everyone laughed

orphydice are standing at the front at the end when everyone is saying “way doooooown” and eurydice is staring at hades and persephone descending and orpheus has his arms around her from behind and when he sees her staring he looks at the audience with a scared look on his face

a gathering storm:

when she says “did you hear me” it’s really upbeat but when she turns around and he’s already gone to work she says “orpheus...?” really sad and dejectedly

after she says “okay finish it” she climbs up to the platform and wraps her arm around him and fucking KISSES HIS SHOULDER before leaving stage i was ??🥺?!🤧?💗?!?!????🥺

epic 2:

it’s really cool - a good set up to chant with orpheus’ song finally coming together and the workers in the background really Make the scene

chant 1:

i was not ready for this

you think you understand how good the lighting in the show is but you don’t until you see chant live don’t even get me started

during hades/persephone’s opening part the entire back wall is a orange/yellow and then for orpheus’ next part they turn their backs to the audience and the back lights turn blue and for all eurydice’s parts they’re the purple/pick like from all i’ve ever known again

when eurydice asks “is it finished” her and hermes are walking behind orpheus in that order and then she turns around to ask “is he always like this” and hermes just lifts up his arms to gesture and nod towards orpheus who has already made his way back to his stool and is writing and then it’s eurydice’s verse and she disappears off to the side again after

when hermes says “orpheus? orpheus?” i had always imagined him trying to get orpheus’ attention but in actuality he’s trying to find him - for the first “orpheus?” he’s looking in the opposite direction off stage and then for the second one he’s looking up and then orpheus catches his eye and he turns to him and starts walking while shaking his head to say “poor boy working on a song” and it seems like he’s going to try and warn/help orpheus but then he seems to cave in after saying “look up” and he decides to just walk away like he’s giving up on stopping orpheus

which - if you go by the “hermes remembers the loop” theory can be read as he knows there isn’t any point to trying to stop him but he has to give it at least a shot

eurydice fights HARD for her bag and jacket it takes like three tries for the fates to take it out of her grip and it’s just as heartbreaking as you think to watch her fall i cried

for the rest of the song eurydice tries so hard to keep walking but she’s clearly freezing and keeps falling and she looks like she’s one of the workers at some parts

hey little songbird:

during this song eurydice is SO SAD the second that hades starts shitting on orpheus and saying he’s a penniless poet she turns to the audience with pouty lips and eyes and they don’t leave for the rest of the song it was Sad

for the beginning of the song she’s just more wary but curious but after that she genuinely just looks heartbroken it was soooooo heart wrenching

i think eva actually was crying too during this song and it was hard to tell at first but she was def crying by gone

at the beginning the three fates seem to be talking amongst themselves but at the first three isolated notes they turn to watch eurydice

when she says “weren’t we birds of a feather” she holds the flower out in front of her and looks at her really sadly

hades nods to the fates during “vipers and vultures” and at the piano group of three notes at the end in the higher key right after he says “they’ll pick you clean“ they smile and wave all innocently it’s so funny

when the chips are down:

the fates choreo was FANTASTICCC i cant even explain they were on fireeeee

when they’re trying to convince eurydice she has her hands squeezed against her ears and falls to the ground at one point

i forget exactly what song it was (i think this one but like i said it’s kind of unclear) but at one point eva dropped the flower and i have no clue if it was purposeful or accidental (i was leaning towards accidental) but she snatched it up so quick and gave a dirty look to the fates like warning them to stay away from it

when eurydice says “oh my aching heart” she looks forward at the audience but clutches the flower to her heart

gone i’m gone:

everyone jumped at the train whistles lmao they were LOUD tho

right after eurydice gives her tickets she puts her hands over her mouth like she can’t believe it and they stay there as she goes down

at this point i forget when exactly it happened but the flower had been out of her hair and she was back to holding it

when eurydice was disappearing after she left and the stage was dark hermes fucking picks up the candle he took from her in the beginnning and BLOWS IT OUT ????? FUCKING NOOO

wait for me:

the intro was sooooo sad the flower stood out so well against the ground

after hermes asks if orpheus has a ticket instead of sounding dejected like in the soundtrack orpheus sounds more affronted like “wha-no?!”

hermes picks up the flower and holds it over orpheus’ heart while he says “if you got the heart” and orpheus takes it and holds it for the rest of the time - mimicking eurydice clutching it for the entire beginning

i was seriously concerned about the lamps hitting his head. i don’t know how it doesn’t happen more often and honestly i totally understand that time it did bc i was like ??? how is he avoiding all these giant swinging lamps rn like he was ducking under them diving out of the way lmao well done reeve

during wait for me at one part the stage isn’t rotating so reeve is just running furiously in place and it’s so fucking funny like. he literally looks like a stressed cartoon character or something

the stage was splitting into three to represent his descent into hadestown during it and the fates were each on a part with their lanterns and looking around alarmed at each other like “wtf is happening. how is he doing this. mom come pick me up i’m scared”

why we build the wall:

even more powerful live. it was my favorite song for a long time and it didn’t disappoint

at the beginning when hades and persephone enter the stage from opposite sides persephone is walking a lot faster like “let’s get this over with” vibes and hades is walking more slow and purposefully

eurydice doesn’t join in until the very end when she turns to the front and puts her hand up like everyone else and sings the last line of the song

hermes and persephone look like they would rather be doing anything else in the world than singing this song rip

when eurydice is about to go up to sign the papers she makes eye contact with persephone who gives her a Look and eurydice just slightly raises her arms in like a “calm down” gesture lmao it was kind of funny but then persephone sadly turns away and shakes her head so it got real sad real quick

during intermission i was the very last row of the orchestra so there was a lot of commotion behind me and i heard someone ask “where’s the women’s room” and a random guy points to the line and says “follow the road to hell” i was cackling

[jeezperseus]

A PLOTTING CALL IN TWO PARTS.

like for a msg !

CHARACTERS & INFO.

perseus hayden alexander xavier lehnsherr.

APPLICATION / INTRO / MUSING TAG

— adopted son of charles xavier & erik lehnsherr. nineteen. pansexual. accidentally married. regenerative healing & healing touch. fc: nick robinson. generation why by canon gray.

split knuckles, impulse tattoos, red solo cups, the copper taste of blood, post-ripped jeans, a story told in two parts, peals of laughter strong as vodka, shaking hands shoved in pockets, greasy fast food, low flying planes, cuffed shoes, the soft notes of a piano, a baseball bat in the back seat.

barbara “bobbi” morse.

APPLICATION / MUSING TAG

— former agent 19. thirties. bisexual. divorced. enhanced. fc: jessica alba. emotionless by drake.

gentle hands, biting remarks, unknown skill, non-disclosure agreements, hidden stashes of cash, studyblr accounts, handmade bullets, a tongue taught to deceive, coffee-mug rims, set shoulders, precise results, minimalism, lilting accent, a broken mirror, clean test tubes, red-painted nails around the hand of a gun.

andromeda rosalie isley-quinzel.

APPLICATION / INTRO / MUSING TAG

 — adopted daughter of pamela isley & harleen quinzel. twenty-one. pansexual. single ( see below ). precognition. fc: lana condor. finest hour by cash cash.

whispers from a voice both soft and powerful, sloppily cut hair, pointe shoes, paint stains on every article of clothing, cassandra foretelling the trojan war, dirt under your fingernails, a love a week, the gold tinsel of a crown, unexplainable dreams, bundles of flowers, the soft rustling of worn cards.

roman darkhölme.

APPLICATION / INTRO / MUSING TAG

— son of raven darkhölme. twenty-four. pansexual. enchanted. persuasion & power absorption. fc: miles heizer. lost boy by ruth b.

the unexpected answer, washing your hands, casual disinterest, stacks of cash, little clear baggies, practiced ease, a silver tongue, whispers of the past, old cobblestone streets, bad decisions in the best way, sweaters and flannel, the burning of flowers, white lab coat, fear of the unknown.

loki.

APPLICATION / MUSING TAG

— the god of mischief. 1000s. fluid. open marriage. fc: daniel gillies & katie mcgrath. wild things by alessia cara.

dark skies, a long steel dagger, fog coming in, green & gold banners held high, the twisted around truth, stories told from a thousand tongues, crooked grin, a crown just out of reach, salt in wounds, ourborous, contrary to a point, blood superiority, loneliness as something else, eyes in the back of your head.

winona falcone.

APPLICATION / INTRO / MUSING TAG

— daughter of sofia falcone. twenty-six. bisexual. single. darkness manipulation. fc: shay mitchell. take me to church by hozier.

expensive fur, champagne glasses, hands covered in blood, instagram perfect, beautiful but deadly, the rich kids of gotham, sharp edges for a reason, dark hair in waves, a product of a situation, cherry stems tied with your tongue, heels on a hardwood floor, the many shades of red.

skylar helix mccoy.

APPLICATION / INTRO / MUSING TAG

— daughter of hank mccoy. twenty-two. lesbian. single ( see below ). genetic atavism & genius intelligence. fc: jennie kim. 400 lux by lorde.

a field of vibrant yellow flowers, the yipping of a small dog, fangs bared, constellations of words, no apologies, thousands of discarded ‘what ifs,’ the call of the wild, a small crescent moon necklace, pride without arrogance, false confidence, spitting blood, intelligence without direction.

CHARACTERS & WCS.

perseus hayden alexander.

a former foster care sibling.

it’s been a while, but he’s a pretty memorable kid / hasn’t changed much at all. until age 5 / 2004, percy was in foster care + went through a bunch of homes. this is someone who was in one of them! probs knows stuff abt him that even he doesn’t/doesn’t rem. the possibilities! 

first relationship / current enemy. TAG

basically, it was percy’s first relationship back in his teens !! cute lil puppy love except he’s awful so not puppies more like … squirrels. like his first everything !! and then they broke up n it didn't go great !!! since then it has evolved and gotten much much worse - they’re now totally and completely against each other, hate each other, and will fuck w each other when given half a chance. 

first relationship / current enemy.

basically, it was percy’s first relationship back in his teens !! cute lil puppy love except he’s awful so not puppies more like … squirrels. like his first everything !! and then they broke up n it didn't go great !!! since then it has evolved and gotten much much worse - they’re now totally and completely against each other, hate each other, and will fuck w each other when given half a chance.

barbara “bobbi” morse.

old mission target.

bobbi worked with shield for a very long time! she went on various missions, undercover and classified and the like. on this particular mission, this is someone she was targetting. what for is up to you, but the options are rather open to interpretation. just generally something that would have set them against shield’s desires.

rival.

bobbi being widely competitive when it comes to just about anything (science, training, lecturing) is bound to attract some friendly competition. they’re constantly versing each other, even in the simplest things, like giving out test results or getting ready.

ex that ended on bad terms.

it’s a common story. girl meets person, girl dates person, girl and person breaks up, girl literally hopes person dies in a fire. for whatever the reason, they didn't part ways peacefully. and you bet your sweet ass she plays the part of scorned ex great.

andromeda rosalie isley-quinzel.

poly ship. ( 0 / 2 ) TAG

andy has baggage, certainly. she’s a past weapon x detainee, unbeknownst to her, adopted from a broken family, and had her heart broken by the first person she dated. she’s serial dated for years. but these people, they made her stop & start to appreciate love for what it is again. this connect can be filled by someone of any gender.

ex. TAG

andy was younger and very awfully naive. she’s never really gotten over it. for whatever reason, they broke up— it could have to do with her slightly overbearing personality, or general attitude, or whatever, totally up to you, but it was the other muse’s decision to break up, leaving andromeda heartbroken and now seeking out love in places it’s not.

former prediction.

andy PREDICTED something about this muse, in the past. how long ago and what is up to you. it was something SERIOUS, though, and most likely bad. it could be as wild as death, or marriage, or a death in the family, or a regret, etc. it’s rly up to u !!

roman darkhölme.

childhood love.

this is honestly rly cute. they were lil lil kids when they were friends and were super cute n close. they got fake “married” once or something. they were just best friends who grew apart. now roman is hella dif. he’s manipulative and a total fiend and it’s like “where’s that cute lil kid who promised to fight off all the bad guys in my life??” like … cute n sad.

enemy.

they see him for what he is: a manipulator. they either have past experience with him or are just adept ( VERY adept; he’s good at hiding ) at noticing him. they don’t enjoy him. not his view of the world, his actions, or his drug dealing. roman doesn’t like them for a point. he doesn’t like being exposed.

clientelle.

the darkhölme-mccoy drug dealing business is going great, actually. paragon is full of just the type. and with roman’s skill of persuasion, they haven’t gotten caught yet. this is someone that roman knows from that particular side of his work. he sells them drugs.

loki.

someone he had a kid with.

the other side of the story. not someone he fathered/mothered, but rather someone he had a child w. can be any gender for obvs reasons. how old the child is is up to u!!!

someone he pretended to be someone else with, extendedly.

for them, he pretended to be a different person… for a very extended period of time. it’s a trick he played often, but for them it was honestly excessive. the nature of their relationship is up to you, but upon coming to paragon this person finds out that loki is LOKI ! god of mischief, stories, lies, what have u. they’re probs pissed lmao 

asgardians.

while most midgardians known them as the god of mischief / alien asshole, this character knows a side of loki outside of the lore. they’ve met their kids & can even remember little loki, just around causing mischief, not trying to overthrow odin & what else. they have a better understanding.

winona falcone.

older sibling.

the oldest falcone ! mwahaha. so it’s this whole big thing that WINONA IS THE HEIR, but she wasn’t always. she has an older sibling who was disinherited from the family & cast out. a big ole family disgrace that none of them like to talk about. the reason behind this is up to you ! but it can range from being a MUTANT to a DEGENERATE to being SOFT to whatever. sofia is a pretty uptight gal.

best friend.

she’s not trying to replace raph. she didn’t think she would actually ever be given the chance, and for good reason. i mean, look at what happened to the last guy who took the spot. but they’re friends, for whatever reason ( and, damn, do the people commenting on her instagram posts speculate ).

ex.

she’s always been the exception that proves the rule. her sexuality is no different in that she’s not hte most comfortable with it. it’s just another thing she never told sofia about, lest her position as heir was to be threatened. that makes her exes an interesting story, especially considering she won’t acknowledge some of them.

skylar helix mccoy.

hateship to ship.

open to fem aligning nb & girls / both have reputations that proceed themselves ! sky obvs bc she had one inherently n bc of what happened & the other for w/e reason. pref an xkid. they knew each other when sky was younger but they didnt get along & when they reconnect , they dont get along right either. theyre a PLAYER really. like new girl on their arm every month. sky becomes one of the girls, rly. and sparks fly. and shes mad abt it. they have this antagonistic hatefuck relationship. and she finds herself starting to rly like them, falling in lov w them, unbeknownst to their own feelings (that shes the ONE). and like that

tutoree.

girl is, in fact, a genius, though people of many have expressed their disbelief at such a fact. she literally didn’t have education for eleven whole years of her development and is still ahead of her peers. she tutors in her free time. while totally organized, studyblr style, her teaching style leaves something to be desired in her paraphrasing of many a thing. ( vicki vc king george iii did what? sky vc fucked half of england )

someone who knew her before.

she was a prodigy child. famous beyond her years. even now, she’s on vogue lists, has millions of instagram followers, the whole thing — but for different reasons. this person knew her before she got taken, and are likely a child of the xmen or someone who was at xaviers. they remember the fearless child, ready to dive into anything, the kid who was always the top of her class. brash and happy, but kind, in a way she no longer is.

[mothraballs]

Sketchbooks From Over The Last Seven Years

I have a box of sketchbooks and random sketches that I’ve been adding to since I was about 12.  Today I went through it all and I decided I’d make a post about it because. idk. why not I guess? So obviously its not every page of every book but like if anyone wants to go through about 7 years of bad sketchbooks and loose sketches and doodles its under the cut. Some nudity

.Going through this sucked a little because like who in the world ever wants to go through their middle school art??? Its hard not to get rid of that stuff because like not only does it suck but it makes me remember middle school and things like anime club and like. ew. But it’s nice to see how much less I suck at this, even if i’m not nearly as talented as I’d like to be. It also makes me sad to think of art i’ve lost, even if it was bad. I don’t have pretty much anything that I did digitally from like age 13-16 because I either deleted it or lost it when a computer broke because i didnt back that up since I didnt think id care but l kinda wish I still had some of that stuff, just like to compare improvement over such a big time period.

 I wanted to find some of my actual finished art to post with this, but I couldn’t find it today, so it’s only sketchbook stuff (but I dont finish a lot of things anyway lol). Maybe I’ll make another post comparing old things I actually finished with new stuff once I can find it because I know it’s around here somewhere anyway heres sketchbooks!!

This is from 7th grade, so I guess I was 12. It’s god fucking awful, complete with drawings of memes (which I will spare u from), slenderman fan art, and a weird message about my middle school bike, which I still have in my garage, being stolen, which it never was. And the brakes do work.

 why

  This one is also from when I was 12, but it’s only about 1/4 of the way full. 

i think i had a mental brakedown here lmao

@douche-mccoosh​ ‘s sexy page

This one was either from 7th-8th grade or just in 8th grade. Idk. Either way I was probably 13 years old. Just a warning: Mlp fan art starts here

1 (ONE) wolf

idk what this is supposed to be honestly

long forgotten OC

This one was also from when I was 13

I had this from age 13-14, I started drawing digitally a LOT more around age 14, so I guess I wasnt rly using my sketchbook as much

this was like straight copied from a piece I saw at an art magnet school I applied to (obviously I didnt get in lmfao) and I really did not understand how dark I needed to make the paper in some spots. And then I never finished it

A pony OC... she was a robot ok

I think I had this one age 14-15. The paper ended up being translucent so I stopped using it early on. Im kinda glad I didn’t fill it up because that actually might be kinda useful to me now

Sweet notes from @lmkno​  

This one wasn’t in the picture on the top bc I found it later. I think I might also be missing like 1 other one too tbh but oh well lol I think I had it when I was 15? really stopped drawing like a lot around this time, I wasn’t doing digital stuff either cuz my computer was broken at the time

This is also about when I stopped throwing away every single thing i drew on a loose piece of paper, so here’s some random sketches from the general timeframe

First sketches of my OCs Vonn, the fish man and Elliot, the girl with pigtails

Some of my art I’ve sorted correlating to the OC’s and the universe they belong in or whatever so here’s some OC’s that sort of came about around that time, some of the pictures are from when I was older though

Ginger

the TV head robot guy was named Seven

the guy with the fuckin,, circle head and weird face is Wolfgang, I still draw him a lot today but ive changed how he looks a  l o t

I had this age 15-16, so like 2014-15. Maybe early 2016? There’s a lot of blank pages and scribbled out things. I 

Wolfgang again

fukkin,,,, gaye ass furry roleplay oc

Sketches on loose paper from the time I think??? I honestly cant tell when all of these are from but they’re gonna go here.

first design of an OC named Eryl

A random D20 character

Eryl

Early drawings of an OC named Lucy Lucy Lucy Lucy Lucy Lucy Lucy Lucy Lucy aka Lucy Ninetimes

Lucy & Wolfgang

And heres more stuff I had sorted by OCs/universe or whatever

main OCs here are Pidgenfinger, with the blue or possibly stylistic black hair, and Chrissy, shes like. A mouse or something

main OCs here are Roland and Ansel, they were like siamese twins and then one of them died at birth and now this guy just has a ghost twin idk it was stupid

Finally we’re at the point that my phone started recognizing faces in my sketchbook. I had this one age 17, i might have started it like right before I turned 17?

Lucy & Wolfgang

Vonn and Elliot on the right side of the page

Pidgenfingersa

Roland & Ansel

Dont Starve fanart on the right

Elliot on the right

Lucy on the bottom left

Vonn & Elliot on this page too

Lucy & Wolfgang, this is dumb but w/e

Von, Elliot, and another OC, Eryl. The lady with horns never got a name

Random Sketches

Lucy

Wolfgang

I got this sketchbook a few months after id turned 18 if i remember correctly 

Lucy, but decapitated

Lucy

Lucy again

Lucy yet again

Lucy!!!!!!!!!!

Wolfgang

(and Lucy)

I got this sketchbok as a gift from my wonderful boyfriend @the-lost-professor​ early january of this year, so technically when I was 18, I’m now 19

Eryl on bottom right

Stuff I did for mermay

some random sketches

My current sketchbok ft. Tsu This one was also a gift from my boyfriend ♥ I got it late June of this year

Wolfgang

Lucy

Wolfgang

Lucy

Wolfgang and Leah, and OC that i made a long ass time go and I dont have the original picture but I redrew her

Wolfgangs and Lucys

Eryl on the left

The last thing I did for mermay, which I technically finished after may ended

Lucy

and the most recent page! With Lucy and Wolfgang on the right

uhhhhhhhhh

im really fucking hungry now and im gonna go eat bye

[apriki]

SAW INFINITY WAR and as you must know, there is much to be said... under the cut!

I WAS MORE UPSET ABOUT HEIMDALL THAN LOKI TBH

and with the time stone in play I take nothing as solid until part 2 is over. Though I hope they stick to their guns and actually have the deaths in acts 1 and 2 be permanent

pray to God valkyrie survived she didn't even get a look in 

I love how they didn't make any of thanos' other children's character designs memorable in the slightest. I've already forgotten them. why were they all that strange blue-grey colour? mediocrity is greige 

I also love that at the end of the first avengers or whenever thanos was like 'fine... I'll do it myself' and he... DID NOT DO THAT and sent his kids instead lmfaaooooo

I am like.... The furthest thing from a tony stark stan and I don't like him most of the time (and he was really trying it in this movie!!! his relationship with Spiderman always misses the mark with me and I hate that the films obviously love it) but Thanos being the terrifying PTSD Goliath of his nightmares is a Good storyline 

I've said before that nebula and Gamora should have been the emotional heart of this movie and they weren't because thanos was with a side of Tony and it's like..... I guess.......

how much better would this whole thing be if thanos was a woman? That's a thought that just occured to me and now it's going to haunt me 

i would very much like to run away to scotland with Paul Bettany and have him kiss my hand and tell me to read his mind 

cap usually does nothing for me at all but seeing him with that Fugitive Beard.... for the first time, I felt things. Things were felt he should always have facial hair

THEY LITERALLY DIDNT EVEN SHOW ANTMAN ABD HAWKEYE BECAUSE NO ONE CARES DJDJJDKSKSK

though a shrink machine... would have been helpful? 

i was about an hour into this film and still not connecting with thanos until, like a eureka, it hit me that HE IS AGAMEMNON 

THANOS IS AGAMEMNON

THE SOUL STONE SCENE WAS IPHIGENIA AT AULIS AND NOW, UNFORTUNATELY, I MUST CARE

i literally was sitting there in my seat BELLIGERENTLY DELIGHTED it's a goddamn GREEK TRAGEDY 

THE HOUSE OF ATREUS IN SPACE

SPACE ATREUS

GAMORA WAS TOO GOOD FOR THE GUARDIANS we deserved a solo movie with her and nebula

who is now the CLYTEMNESTRA I CANNOT BELLLLIIEEEVEEE

Thanos as an environmentalist is... so funny the EPA as a villain? okay trump administration

was that the bad guy from Captain America the first avenger? Like.... The Nazi????? Why on earth did they bring him back lmao 

SHURI IS THE SMARTEST PERSON ON EARTH, WE KNEW THIS 

it is so fucking funny that marvel realised, belatedly, that they have more than one female hero now and so gave them a fight scene together

19 films in. 10 years later 

okay look i know that giving up the time stone is The One Timeline that ends in them beating thanos and that it had to be done but like

I AM SO FUCKING PISSED THAT HALF THE /////UNIVERSE///// DIED... TO SAVE TONY STARK LMFAO

LIKE I KNOW THATS NOT THE REASON BUT NARRATIVELY IT WAS THE REASON and it's.... some bullshit 

case in point: MISS WANDA WHO DID WHAT FUCKING NEEDED TO BE DONE 

they really made her kill her boyfriend... her gentle boyfriend who is Paul Bettany.... theyre really trying to make me care about Wanda and vision

why did the wakanda battle feel like that fight between the gungans and the droids in phantom menace?????? Jajsjdhhdhdjjdjfj

having people fight hand to hand on the ground against a massive alien army invasion was ridiculous 

wakanda forever though M'BAKU IS TOO BEAUTIFUL

HE CALLED TCHALLA HIS BROTHER!

OKOYES SIDE EYE AT BUCKY DJDJDJDJDJEJ  

the guardians humor felt mad out of place this whole movie lmao

is it wrong I didn't care if Drax was dead dead when thanos turned him into rubber or whatever? 

I'm cool with thanos' culling if it kills off all the annoying dudes. Marvel is too full of them  

if thanos is agamemnon - and he is - that makes Steve hector and again, I for the first time in my whole life, Felt Things for him in that last scene. you really did it Kevin Feige

AND THANOS SMILED, FOR THERE WERE NO MORE WORLDS TO CONQUER 

AND I LOOKED DOWN UPON MY NEW DOMINION AS MASTER OF ALL; AND I THOUGHT IT GOOD.

okay my brother is of a different opinion on this but:

THAT ENDING WAS CHEAP AND STUPID AND I LOATHED IT

you kill off half the characters including ones with films we already know are yet to come out so we KNOW their deaths will never stick

it was cheap ploy and bad storytelling

You know that bit in breaking dawn 2 where they kill everyone in a huge fight but it turns out it's just a premonition Alice shows aro? THAT IS THE END OF INFINITY WAR

it would've made much more sense to kill of the original avengers imo - that way there was at least a chance their deaths would stick

but my brother thinks they've done this specifically so the og avengers will turn around and sacrifice themselves instead in part 2

which... I guess....

so my criticisms on that are partially on hold but I dont Like It

can't wait to see ten thousand metas about Steve watching Bucky disintegrate and then brushing his hand through the ashes 

thor's new Phallic Imagery hammer is ridiculous and his whole side mission felt wasteful

there were so many logical fallacies in this movie I know I know, it's a superhero movie! Suspend disbelief! but you're telling me Thanos has the power to disintegrate a moon and he wouldn't just aim.the gauntlet at tony or the guardians and disintegrate THEM? and how can Wanda's power which is only a small offshoot of a stone destroy another stone? MAKES NO SENSE FAM

what is the soul stone's power even

the thanos fight scenes all had that brutal winter soldier intensity but the wakanda battle was wayyyyy too bloated

the captain marvel post credits scene was dumbbb lol 

I kind of wanted it to be just Hawkeye and antman eating their breakfast

and then they turn to ash 

I'm like 90% sure you wouldn't understand this film if you haven't seen like at least 10 other marvel ones before it lmao

[shytiff]

Small Nov Wins

1 - cant bring myself to study, got out of bed 10:30-ish am. While lazing around i read royal servant and do random internet stuff and watched romee's vlogs. Ate breakfast and i somehow has no appetite?? This is rare. e, cicil kompre began at 15:30 pm (i know, i waste my time a lot). Pengumuman wahana mpi wow yay kalideres makara and budi asih

2 - the weather was pleasantly cloudy. poli anestesi anak, simul. went to what used to be calais, its called flavola now. at this point i quite need some calories because i only ate bubur ayam and its like 2-3 pm ish. Eventually the hunger is gone, arrived home at about 4-ish, drank protein to curb my hunger (nanggung dinner). dad said sumn that annoyed me so after maghrib i just lazed in bed, not feeling like doing anything (even though there’s lots of exams and hw lmao), fell asleep

3 - woke up at 2 am, prated, randomly searched for angel - chancellor and taeyeon’s lyrics and i basically wept at 4 am. i assumed the song was just like,,, a guy talking to a girl, his angel, you know. EXCEPT,,,,,,,,. the 2 MVs was also rly222 beautiful 🥺. Poli geriatri today, didnt even see patient because there was no more at that time (status salin nadia). ate ichiban salad (surprisingly quite good) at dm bcs i rly do be functioning better outdoors, made matcha latte with full cream milk ((powder)), cicil PT

4 - can finally wake up late. finished 1 sitasi pt, made ikk ppt, bujing lina called about diarrhea and nausea meds, laddered the leader for tomorrow’s exam and it,, was,,, me,, group call with shiko. frantically studied for EA

5 - PT (finished in 45 mins), simul as a leader, with STEMI, VF and hypoglycemia case. somehow made it through. i suck at dosages omggg. PP by car with mom (not rly that tired) but i SLEPT after i got home and had no mood to study helpppp

6 - did my first swab test today. i pushed the doctors hand when she’s doing oropharyngeal swab im sorryyyy 😂. slept. matcha. cicil kompre

7 - still havent finished ikk (deadline: today), and still havent studied for geri and ikk AND i still managed to take a nap. why. Read a bit of kompre. Not sleepy after matcha, but insted i reread bj alex and tsubaki chou lonely planet until 2 am the next day #rippriorities

8 - im having matcha latte seven days in a row as of today :))))) woke up at 10:30 am, went to flavola with atikah and got strawberry yakult (tasted like es mony), arrived home at abt 7-ish am and there no dinner, so i drank protein and ate japota honey butter. My breakfast was chicken porridge, so my diet is sooo liquid today. Rip proper nutrition (ate buryam, lumpia, japota for the whole day and drank 3 beverage). Cicil kompre and studied geri

9 - suma geri, slept, cicil kompre, ny head kind of hurts

10 - my head still hurts, suma ikk with dr herqu and dr retno, didnt take swab result by car because the TRAFFIC in soetta so my brother took it. Thankfully negative.

11 - lulus kompre alhamdulillah, the examiner were Prof Saptawati and dr. Dani from THT. Dr dani still remembered me :"") they were very kind. Went to tamel for first wahana: klinik makara UI. Picked up masker first at mahmudas place, and then went to depok. On the way i was interviewed by maba 2020 wtf im so old. Cleaned up my room with the fam, printed sumn in barel (its quite empty there)

12 - first day at klinik makara ui. i WALKED. such wow. fixed my shoes in kutek. had breakfast in barel and bahari for lunch-dinner. somehow i felt very drained. bought Dapur Alya (nutella and regal) and 2 salads from Salad Point since there was 11.11 promo. Put all of them in the fridge. Read Fools and its sooo good omg

13 - had salad and left over bahari rice for brekkie. went to clinic by grabbike :)))), had my first teleconsultation experience today, a chemical trauma case. suma ea with the help of shiko

14 - woke up at 5:20 ish and i jogged a bit at ui lmaoo. fisip - ft - fisip. By 6:30 im already back at my room. 1 hour can be spent a lot of different ways, it turns out. Washed my clothes. Ate monstercheese pizza. Slept a bit. Went to blok m with ara (she was late as always, surprised her with koi milk tea), ate futago ya (greasy cheesy milky goodness, enak tapi eneg afterwards), bought red bean bread at la mouette, bought discounted onigiri bento box at papaya. We went to m bloc space, looked around, ate gelato at kebunide (blueberry: yum, fresh, kiiinda feels artificial, salted caramel: delicious but makes me thirsty) and did photobox at connectoon. Walked to mrt asean but turns out!! for weekends mrt is closed at 8pm. Took grabbike to sudirman, seeing the pretty city and people just hanging out, playing skateboards on the wide sidewalks.

15 - planned to go jogging with salemba frens but i woke up late (06:45), so i just lazed around. Ate onigiri bento (super worth it for 25k for the proteins), fell asleep again 10ish to 14:30 lmaoo. The doms from yesterday was present even on the right side of my lower back 🙂 the red bean bread made me feel full, and the red bean was not too sweet, which i love. Reviewed some meshwork materials i missed. Fianti called and we talked abt her and hari

16 - had mujigae for sahur and fish bite for iftar. The fish was not as soft as fish streat, but the flour was definitely better and crunchy. But it doesnt have the seasoning micin like fish streat do. The pasta was quite a lot im in food coma afterwards. Fell asleep, and my stomach was so gassy that i woke up in the middle with a headache that does not play around. Fortunately it dissapeared in the morning

17 - breakfast is rice kimchi and abon lmaoo just pretend it makes sense. The scrubs i ordered finally arrived. I fell asleep AGAIN, WHYYYY. Lost my streak in DL, i guess i can stop using it for now.

18 - finished reading blood link, girlll i thought the human died at the end. Did not buy food today wow. Took a nap and cicil kompre.

19 - brekkie at barel. Helped measuring antropometry today at clinic, and also measured my own. The fucked up thing was that i THOUGHT my body fat is still at 28% compared to the past (dr rina's research). So i looked at the old paper AND. I USED TO HAVE. 35% FAT 🙂 even my memories are in denial and are fooling me. All this time i thought i was at 28 🙂 did swab at rsui. The one swabbing was from fkui 2012 and we had small talk. It hurted more than lmk :( now this does feel like drowning in water (cause before i said "nah its not like water in nose"). Took angkot back to tamel, bought piscok lumer pocin and its soooo gooood ugh

20 - i feel like if i have breakfast with leftover rice and abon and sozzis i get hungry faster lmaoo. Ordered ken karaage from kukusan, yaa okela for 25k with ongkir. Did online posbindu education through wa. BTS BE COMEBACK 🥺 i maximized my wifi time (no wifi at tamel) so i listened to the whole album. My mobile data is at 200MB lol. Read a good longreads from the atlantic, about down synd and genetic screening. The writing is so so good im just blown away. And teary eyed.

21 - ran a bit, solid class (gastro, rheum, infection), embryo, webinar about sleep by dr Gita Anindyajati, SpKJ, bought ayam geprek gold chick (lotsss of oil since i ordered tempe, jamur, egg, bought pop cookies. matcha cheese was actually better than i expected (the combination somehow fits), dark chocolate and marshmallow is very chocolatey like mom’s brownies, and vegan strawberry cookie with a hint of mint. i wonder how they replace the egg. I wonder why after i run i dont feel hungry for a moment. bloating just gooes away

22 - joined kris' healthy weekly event (lmao) in tamsur. They went to epiwalk first. Its difficult for me to run w mask, ngl. Went back to tamel, embryo, ate leftover meal from gold and chick, felt somehow drained to the bone so i just laid in bed and lazed and lazed. Theres no soreness, but the weakness was generalized lmao. Ordered bbq chicken almond salad from salad point, it was actually quite fulfilling and delishhh (added chili sauce to the dressing). Literally laid in bed from 7 until i fell asleep and woke up at 6 the next day. Finished readin shame application lmao

23 - i still feel tired ckckck. No doms, but i feel like i just want to lay down. got DV patient today at clinic, its most likely derm numularis??? Ate salad and dark choco marshmallow cookies in the evening and that cookie. Is so damn sweet im just thinking about the increase in my blood sugar. And i like sweets so!!! Never thought id find sumn too sweet. Washed my clothes and cicil ukmppd (i put things about studying ukmppd in habitica now)

24 - ate tanoshi sushi and ufo ramen for bfast, ate the sushi again for lunch and after waking up from my sleep i tried kokku ramen (so so, but the egg yolk's good)

25 - bfast: superbubur, protein shake and cookies. (did not make me feel full long enough). Ordered burger from EATG (so so, burger bener is better) for lunch. Last day at makara ui. Ara arrived coz shes staying here in tamel. Waiting for mom to arrive from cibubur, she arrived at about 20:30. I passed out at home

26 - first day in pkm kalideres, i volunteered to be pj to avoid RSUD. my room is a mess, i feel tired after i go back. maybe its the physical withdrawal (?) because i dont walk like when im on klinik makara. came to pkm thinking i wont do anything (orientation only) but the 6 of us ended up going. i was at igd. i saw nail extraction and injected ats for another patient 

27 - talked for almost an hour with the doctor at poli lansia. went home, felt sooo tired, i slept and actually showered after maghrib. originally planned to go to sbux but i was just tired af. my mood was horrible at home. 

28 - turns out i started my period today. i havent studied at all during pkm kalideres era. embryo. slept again. read some manga by nishin something with the psychological and BL genre. 

29 - embryo. cut my hair, showered, and felt better. fell asleep on dr gita's lecture. Drank cimory banana milk with a bit of matcha powder. I dont know if its the sleep, or a bit of caffeine, but my mood feels better and im more awake. Cicil ukmppd with a slow pace. Read itasaku ff. Slept at about 2 am

30 - surprisingly, i dont feel sleepy when i wake up. poli anak today, surprisingly i got perinatology case (jaundice). presented it on pleno. for bfast i ate 3 slice of bread (2 with meat and cheese, 1 choco and cheese) and protein shake, lunch: a slice of choco cheese bread and a banana, fell asleep, dinner: 1 bakwan, a banana and nextar. i can feel that the calories i got today is even less than what i usually got (and usually i already try to limit calories that i am counting the intake amout and made sure im not too far from my bmr lmaoo (~1100)

[chickenfetus]

rules: you must answer these 85 statements and tag 20 people

i was tagged falen do i even need to @ her at this point everyone knows who she is

THE LAST:

1. Drink: water i dont drink anything else and yet my face doesnt cooperate 

2. Phone call: i hm?? my friends i guess but all of which are to wake them up and i usually mute my side so really no talking is done

3. Text message: my tuition teacher lMAO

4. Song you listened to: it just ended and i forgot but my day by day6 just started playing

5. Time you cried: i WANTEd to cry today but i didnt i dont rmb when was the last time i cried tbh??

6. Dated someone twice: i no

7. Kissed someone and regretted it: i accidentally command + n and typed no into that search bar of the new window i created um

8. Been cheated on: n o

9. Lost someone special: uuu no

10. Been depressed: i doubt so

11. Gotten drunk and thrown up: i only know my best friend water

LIST 3 FAVORITE COLORS:

12-14. blue, green, grey

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU:

15. Made new friends: yeEHAHH

16. Fallen out of love: no my crushes are a lie

17. Laughed until you cried: yEAH PROBABLY

18. Found out someone was talking about you: hmMmm i guess

19. Met someone who changed you: im constantly changing who am i

20. Found out who your friends are: yes

21. Kissed someone on your Facebook list: whats facebook

GENERAL:

22. How many of your Facebook friends do you know in real life: refer to 21

23. Do you have any pets: i want pets but realistically speaking i’d end up killing both of us

24. Do you want to change your name: maaybe??? if i ever thought of smth better but thinking is hard so no thanks

25. What did you do for your last Birthday: i stayed home LOL

26. What time did you wake up: 6am i heart school

27. What were you doing at midnight last night: my eyes were closed and i was having my good rest tm

28. Name something you can’t wait for: i cant wait for exams to end in october (just kidding i cant wait for monday more exams!!! day6 august comeback imMMM)

29. When was the last time you saw your mom: this morning

30. What is one thing you wish you could change in your life: finding out abt all my current interests/friends earlier

31. What are you listening right now: blood by day6 surprise its the gods again

32. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: no 

33. Something that is getting on your nerves: my lazy ass

34. Most visited Website: (from most to least) twitter, youtube/v live, tumblr

35. Elementary: i like how it just says this like what sort of question

36. High School: i am high school i think

37. College: i am high school

38. Haircolor: black?? with random streaks of brown LMAO idk how that happened but ive had ppl asking me if i dyed it too

39. Long or short hair: long i cant wait 2 cut it

40. Do you have a crush on someone: day6

41. What do you like about yourself: i uh stay hydrated everyday surfs up 42. Piercings: no pain in this house

43. Bloodtype: A (loser)

44. Nickname: deadass when i typed 43 i didnt see falens ans for this and i was shockd its egg

45. Relationship status: in a love hate r/s with day6 

46. Pronouns: she/her

47. Favorite TV show: i dont even watch anime that often anymore whats a tv

48. Tattoos: no pain no gain no its really fine please  49. Right or left: these questions istg right handed

50. Surgery: none

51. Sport: is this asking what my fav sport is or what dude volleyball but i cant play it properly LMAO 

52. Vacation: dream vacation?? japan

53. Pair of trainers: i only wear converse 

MORE GENERAL:

54. Eating: air 55. Drinking: should i drink smth now itll be water

56. I’m about to: doing all of these

57. Waiting for: bed time

58. Want: dea 59. Get married: no

60. Career: another no

WHICH IS BETTER:

61. Hugs or kisses: huhuhuhuhug

62. Lips or eyes: eyes maybe

63. Shorter or taller: taller amen

64. Younger or older: older?? apparently i have a thng 4 that any grandmas want to hang out tmr

65. Nice arms or nice stomach: LEGS

66. Sensitive or loud: anythinggg

67. Hook up or relationship: relatiosnhop

68. Troublemaker or hesitant: mayb like a mix

HAVE YOU EVER:

69. Kissed a stranger: nooo

70. Drank hard liquor: onlyy hard water 

71. Lost glasses/contact lenses: no how do u lose ur glasses if theyre on ur face

72. Turned someone down: i wouldnt count any from the past bc we were young

73. Sex in the first date: nnoo

74. Broken someones heart: no 75. Had your heart broken: i guess

76. Been arrested: LOL

77. Cried when someone died: no,, ,,

78. Fallen for a friend: yeah

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:

79. Yourself: no LOL

80. Miracles: who

81. Love at first sight: uh 

82. Santa Claus: no i never got presents anyway

83. Kiss in the first date: i

84. Angels: yeha day6

OTHER:

85. Current best friends name: day6

86. Eye color: daark brownn

87. Favorite movie: my life (its a comedy)

tagging no oneeee

[selurroub]

I was tagged by @4hobii and @stoparmys thanks pals RULES: you must answer these 92 statements and tag 20 people THE LAST:
1. drink: water
2. phone call: probably my mom
3. text message: i was a rant to a friend
4. song you listened to: whatever was on the radio in the car i don't even remember
5. time you cried: the last time i watched la la land
6. dated someone twice: nah
7. kissed someone and regretted it: few years ago :/
8. been cheated on: not been in a real relationship so never
9. lost someone special: a few years ago
10. been depressed: last time i check it was now lmao
11. gotten drunk and thrown up: nah LIST 3 FAVOURITE COLOURS:
12-14. pastel pink, pastel yellow, and navy blue IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU:
15. made new friends: yeah lots cuz I got me a job
16. fallen out of love: nah I havent been in it in awhile so
17. laughed until you cried: probably
18. found out someone was talking about you: ye
19. met someone who changed you: also probably? 
20 found out who your friends are: yeah i hope so
21. kissed someone on your Facebook list: dont use facebook ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ GENERAL:
22. how many of your Facebook friends do you know in real life: again, i dont use fb
23. do you have any pets: ye 2 chihuahuas and 2 cats
24. do you want to change your name: nah
25. what did you do for your last birthday: saw an old 40's movie I love in theaters with a pal and then saw La La Land with another friend the next day
26. what time did you wake up: 5:50 :)) i had xc practice
27. what were you doing at midnight last night: playing animal crossing lmao
28. name something you can’t wait for: my friend to get back from camp so i can yell at her for busting up her legs smh
29. when was the last time you saw your mom: few hours ago
30. what is one thing you wish you could change in your life: I wish this one friend of mine didnt like me
31. what are you listening to right now: nothing 
32. have you ever talked to a person named tom: ye my neighbor
33. something that is getting on your nerves: myself and how lazy ive been this summer
34. most visited website: tumblr and youtube
35-37. lost questions?? 
38. hair colour: light brown
39. long or short hair: short-medium!!! I just cut my hair like 4 inches off and !! I'm loving it!
40. do you have a crush on someone: other than adorable strangers I fall in love with for .2 seconds, no
41. what do you like about yourself: i like making people laugh and i'm alright at it. Nice boobs too
42. piercings: ears pierced but uuI want double and a cartilage and a septum
43. bloodtype: idk
44. nickname: say
45. relationship status: single and happy that way for the most part
46. zodiac: aquarius
47. pronous: she/her
48. favourite tv show: the office probably but i love almost any cartoon also
49. tattoos: none, gonna get a cross somewhere someday
50. right or left handed: right
51. surgery: ye for tonsils and again for a dog bite and again for some teeth issues
52. piercing: ye ears
53. sport: i run cross country and track !!
55. vacation: im stuck at home all summer but im missing orange county so bad rn
56. pair of trainers: trainers to me means the shoes i run in so my brooks defiance or w/e theyre called??? MORE GENERAL
57. eating: nothing 
58. drinking: nothing
59. i’m about to: go to bed lmao its 2:48 and i have to get up at 5:40 :))
61. waiting for: the end of summer
62. want: to not have to deal with my pal liking me
63. get married: someday !!
64. career: i dont fuckin know uhh lets see: illustrator, graphic designer, highschool teacher, biologist, chemist, idk man :)) WHICH IS BETTER
65. hugs or kisses: hugs
66. lips or eyes: eyes
67. shorter or taller: taller
68. older or younger: older
70. nice arms or nice stomach: arms gimme those thicc muscular arms
71. sensitive or loud: idk
72. hook up or relationship: relationship but tbh neither
73. troublemaker or hesitant: idk HAVE YOU EVER:
74. kissed a stranger: if spin the faygo (i wanna kill 2015 me) counts than ye
75. drank hard liquor: no
76. lost glasses/contact lenses: ye
77. turned someone down: ye
78. sex on the first date: lol no
79. broken someone’s heart: maybe
80. had your heart broken: absolutely so so badly lmao
81. been arrested: no
82. cried when someone died: yeah 
83. fallen for a friend: ye happens a lot DO YOU BELIEVE IN:
84. yourself: not usually
85. miracles: yes!
86. love at first sight: no
87. santa claus: no
88. kiss on the first date: sometimes
89. angels: absolutely! OTHER:
90. current best friend’s name: Katie and Shaina
91. eye colour: bluegreen
92. favourite movie: idk some favs are Singin' in the Rain, Funny Face, La La Land, Nausicaa of the Valley of the Wind, and Perfect Blue tho plus some I'm sure I forgot i tag @thesmuppeteer

[vvhymack]

do All the pride questions

omfg ily ok its under the cut

1. what is your sexuality?a. i’m bi!!

2. what do gender do you identify as?a. agender

3. how long have you been aware of your sexuality/gender?a. um, quite a few years now, i’d say 5 or more?

4. do you have any preferences?a. lmao if i got w/ a guy, i wouldnt be disowned or killed so that would be cool i guess

5. share a positive memory about coming out!a. i remember me and a girl coworker of mine got into this 2 hour argument w/ another coworker bc he was super homophobic and we got pissed and i got kind of pissy and emotional and the girl took me outside for a smoke break and calmed me down and i used to drop her home and on the way back, she came out to me as bi and i did the same and we both breathed a sigh together.

6.how do you feel about pride month?a. i love it!!! also it makes me sad bc i cant take part irl and also the pulse shootings and its just heartbreaking sometimes because of why we need pride

7. do you participate in pride related events? any other events?a. no i cant lol i live in a country where its illegal 2 be gay

8. how do you feel about lgbtq roles in media?a. theyre so important but its also important how theyre portrayed. fetishization or infantalization occur too often and its just tiring that sometimes media is pandering to straight ppl who fetishize us rather than.... us

9. do you feel pride in who you are?a. yea i’ll punch a tree i dont give a shit

10. who has been your supportive idols in your self discovery?a. tumblr i guess lol idk its been chill i dont remember

11. tell us about your first crush?a. probably grade school on some stupid boy who didnt deserve it

12. what sort of advice to have you lgbtq teens? a. surround urself w/ positive ppl. its not the end, there are others like u, u’ll find ppl who will accept u for who u are even if you cant leave ur conservative environment

13. have you come out to friends and family?a. friends, yea, my close ones, family??? no? not really. im from a conservative muslim family but i drop vague hints lmao im wearing a shirt rn that says “this girl likes girls” and no ones gotten it yet so

14. how do you feel about the term “coming out” ?a. its fine

15. do you believe there is a “closet” to come out of?a. the closet is heteronormativity my friends

16. any tips on coming out?a. do it whenever and with whomever ur comfortable. if u dont ever wanna come out to someone, dont. youre not obligated to.

17. what’s your biggest pet peeve when it comes to lgbtq characterization in media?a. fetishization and too little screen time and mostly white or dead lol

18. what’s your favorite parts of lgbtq characterization in media?a. it makes me cry when its beautifully done, lgbtq folks will smile and i’ll feel this swell of hope and happiness and i love you all im crying

19. what did your teachers say about the lgbtqa community in school?a. lol dont be a gay its haram

20. do you practice safe sex with the same gender?a. i would

21. what’s an absolute turn off for you in the opposite/same gender?a. anyone who makes me uncomfortable

22. what’s an absolute turn on for you in the opposite/same gender?a. passion!!! i s2g whenever someone talks passionately abt somethign i fall in love. also hair and hands.

23. how do you feel about lgbtq clubs/apps/websites?a. hell yas

24. how do you feel about the term “queer” ?a. i call myself queer but i understand why ppl dont wanna be called it or dont want it to be used as an umbrella term

25. how does you country view the lgbtq community?a. idk theyll probably deport us the first chance they can so it doesnt ruin their image but like ? they’re chill as long as we dont come out from underground i guess

26. favorite lgbtq actor/actress?a. andy meintus, a bi icon

27. any tips for heterosexual and/or cisgender people on how to handle lgbtq events/news?a. dont talk over lgbt ppl and use ur privilage to amplify their voices thanks

28. what’s the most annoying question you have ever gotten?a. how can u be muslim and queer at the same time????

29. how do you feel about receiving questions about your sexuality/gender?a. i dont mind!!

[baekhoneyed]

tagged by @kokokysoo for one of those “get to know me” memes! (under the cut cuz its so long)

RULES: you must answer these 92 statements and tag 20 people (idk how many people ill end up tagging and dont feel obligated!!)

THE LAST:

1. Drink: water but like i think my flatmates put vodka in the ice cube trays so?? not sure exactly how much is accidentally Not Water

2. Phone Call: uhhhhh a study abroad program advisor

3. Text Message: my older brother tryna convince me that i’ll make friends eventually lmao

4. Song you listened to: i actually stopped writing this to grab a sweater but then TT came on and i instinctively dance to it now so that happened

5. Time you cried: almost last night but like... not enough feelings to actually cry yet just wait

6. Dated someone twice: never even dated someone once, bro...

7. Kissed someone and regretted it: i never regret giving my dog kisses but sometimes my cat swipes at me :/

8. Been cheated on: gotta have a boyfriend first to get cheated on

9. Lost someone special: yup

10. Been depressed: only since i was 12 years old  l m f a o

11. Gotten drunk and thrown up: i hate puking so i never go past being tipsy

LIST 3 FAVORITE COLORS:

12. red!

13. millennial pink fight me

14. rose gold fight me again

IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU:

15. Made new friends: yyyes but i sure would like to make some more Here, at my Current University

16. Fallen out of love: mmm not Love but definitely Like? i stopped Liking someone who i had a crush on

17. Laughed until you cried: so frequently it’s worrisome

18. Found out someone was talking about you: um did u mean middle and high school? i was such a petty bitch tho i put em in their places after crying in my room alone lmfao

19. Met someone who changed you: yes yes yes! dallon is the first who comes to mind he’s... no words

20. Found out who your friends are: ummm i dont know?

21. Kissed someone on your facebook list: ...my mom??? lmao

GENERAL:

22. How many of your facebook friends do you know in real life: all of them except a few who ive just added bc we’re all transfer students to the same university this year and im Desperate

23. Do you have any pets: yes!! 2 cats, Harry and Kai (shut up ok i’ve always liked that syllable in chinese) and one dog, Lady my perfect cuddle angel baby

24. Do you want to change your name: honestly... sometimes yeah? but only because it’s so boring when it’s translated into chinese/korean so maybe i’d just change my names in those languages idk

25. What did you do for your last birthday: probably just went out to dinner w/ my family, but when i got back to my old college my friends and i went to a store in Queens it was such a good day...

26. What time did you wake up: like... noon probably lmao #depression

27. What were you doing at midnight last night: rewatching exo next door and gettin emotional over ksoo

28. Name something you can not wait for: THE POWER OF MUSIC BITCH LESS THAN 12 HOURS NOW

29. When was the last time you saw your mom: a couple weeks ago when she and my dad helped me move in to my apartment

30. What is one thing you wish you could change in your life: i wish i didnt have fucking depression! anxiety is easy to deal with for me but depression isnt

31. What are you listening to right now: walk on memories

32. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: i have a 2nd cousin named Tom he’s like 50 years old

33. Something that is getting on your nerves: ......so much

34. Most visited website: netflix/facebook/tumblr

35. Mole/s: one on my back, one on my neck, one under my left boob... i think that’s it

36. Mark/s: mostly bruises on my shins bc im clumsy; also some shaving scars from like 3+ years ago (one of em bled for 4 days while i was in china!)

37. Childhood dream: typical american kid stuff like ballerina and movie star

38. Hair color: medium brown i guess? it used to be lighter but it’s been getting darker as i get older

39. Long or short hair: i just cut it short again so it’s just touching my shoulders when dry (it’s wavy-curly so it’s a bit longer than that in reality)

40. Do you have a crush on someone: yeah can i have uhhhhhhhh byun baekhyun? no one irl tho

41. What do you like about yourself: ive got a great complexion that has really calmed down in the past few years! and i love my eyes ive got gorgeous eyes and a nice smile and a cute body and ive been doin self-love the past year can u tell?

42. Piercings: just regular ear piercings that i only got... a year ago...

43. Blood type: i never remember but maybe O? whichever one is the most common i think idk tho

44. Nickname: lulu is a nickname, ummm ive had a few friends call me em or ems which is cute

45. Relationship status: chronically single and repulsive to the male population, perhaps?

46. Zodiac: sun in pisces/leo rising (fun fact when i was little a kid asked me my sign so i said pisces and he called me fish poop so i cried) (he was probably a gemini the fuckin asshole), year of the tiger

47. Pronouns: she/her

48. Favorite tv show: pushing daisies, 30 rock, scrubs, grey’s anatomy but only up til the 8th season then it’s bad

49. Tattoos: i actually almost got one a few weeks ago but then i lost my job :/ i wanted to get “je ne regrette rien” tattooed on my hip bone real small

50. Right or left handed: right - i used to be able to write pretty well with my left hand but alas...

51. Surgery: yyyup wisdom teeth removal, eyelid surgery to get rid of some bumpy things, broken arm when i was like 1.5 years old, and im getting lasik next summer probably

52. Piercing: ya already asked ya doofus

53. Sport: my dad made me play basketball in middle school i got 2 technical fouls bc i had anger issues so i stopped playing basketball. i got Decent at ballet tho!

54. Vacation: we havent really had the money lately

55. Pair of trainers: i just bought 2 new pairs bc i ruined my only pair in seoul and had to throw them out (they got soaked in the rain and then mildewed n all) (side note: they’re so expensive?? the adidas and nike were as expensive as the new balance which is Silly so i just bought adidas and nike)

MORE GENERAL:

56. Eating: nothing rn but i need to go get dinner...

57. Drinking: did we not already go over this

58. I’m about to go: either to the dining hall or to a nearby restaurant im honestly not sure 

59. Waiting for: exo to move in next door to me only to discover that one of them is my childhood best friend-slash-first love and another has fallen in love with me and my clumsy but lovable personality :)

60. Want: byun baekhyun (im kidding kind of, um i want to make friends here and be less anxious about my classes and life in general)

61. Get married: yeah one day but so far no one i’ve met is Vibing with that seeing as no one will even ask me out im not Super Hopeful :/

62. Career: chinese major/korean minor at a university um hopefully after i graduate someone will hire me and give me money to do something i dont completely hate but we’ll see

WHICH IS BETTER:

63. Hugs or kisses: i literally would not know so i will say Hugs because they’re the only things ive experienced! and i could use a really long hug rn

64. Lips or eyes: ...eyes... but lips r important too cuz i cant even look at a photo of amy schumer anymore w/out staring at her terrifying lips

65. Shorter or taller: taller but someone around my height would be ok too (.....im just sayin im like the same height as bbh...)

66. Older or younger: older bc im not about to go dating a freshman or a high schooler lmfao

67. Nice arms or nice stomach: arrrrrrrrms

68. Hookup or relationship: never had either but i think i’d prefer a stable relationship to some extent?? we just dont know

69. Troublemaker or hesitant: im a troublemaker when im comfortable w/ people/places but other than that hesitant

HAVE YOU EVER:

70. Kissed a stranger: no

71. Drank hard liquor: yeah it’s nasty :/ but it does the trick

72. Lost glasses/contact lenses: somehow no

73. Turned someone down: ya this one guy hit on me when i was walking thru myeongdong but he was a) a stranger b) 25 years old c) from egypt so like it was never gonna happen buddy

74: Sex on the first date: gonna need a first date before i can even answer (the answer would be no i am not down w/ that) 

75. Broken someone’s heart: probably not, ill dont think im capable of doing that plus im still so young that realistically it just hasnt been a possibility

76. Had your heart broken: not really, my silly crushes have all been resolved easily bc i never talk about them and then i notice things i dont like about the person and stop liking them like that

77. Been arrested: no but a friend of mine got arrested for trespassing on a roof in nyc last year lmao

78: Cried when someone died: yeah

79. Fallen for a friend: sort of? briefly? it never went anywhere it was silly

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:

80. Yourself: i try to most days but it’s rough

81: Miracles: i mean im not a non-believer but i also don’t actively wait for them to happen or really put much stock in them

82. Love at first sight: im not sure because bbh hasnt seen me yet so how would we know??

83. Santa Claus: not anymore i think when i was 8 i sorta stopped

84. Kiss on the first date: never even had a first date or a first kiss ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

85. Angels: um yeah actually! proof they exist - byun baekhyun do kyungsoo kim jongdae kim jongin the list goes on,,

OTHER:

90. Current best friends: dallon, lilli, ida, stephanie, aria!

91: Eye color: light green. i have Gorgeous eyes!!!

92: Favorite movie: a taiwanese movie called Secret, i rly liked ksoo’s movie Hyung, Chicago the Musical... there are more but im drawing a blank

i guess ill tag... no one but if ur reading this and u wanna do it feel free to say i tagged u! i love learning about u guys it makes me feel less alone

[nxctvrnaltrippyhippie-blog]

Getting to know some of me

1: Name: Danny 2: Age: 19 3: 3 Fears: Lonliness, Death, Waste 4: 3 things I love: Adventures, Food, Doggiess 5: 4 turns on: Talkative, Compassionate, Different 6: 4 turns off: Close minded, Two-Faced, Selfish 7: My best friend: No one.. 8: Sexual orientation: Tbh, I only fall in love with woman but the pleasure of what a man holds for some reason turns me on 😞 but once it happens at the end i feel disgusted and dont even wanna look at him .-. Nor fall in love. The desire pops up but to love a guy no.. sounds weird but trust, it even confuses me.. 9: My best first date: Honestly wish someone would ask ME out for once ;-; it would be the best just having someone ask me o": 10: How tall am I: 5'1 ;-; 11: What do I miss: Enjoying life 12: What time were I born: What is this 13: Favorite color: Omg 14: Do I have a crush: Yeah.. i guess.. its weird..😞 15: Favorite quote: not sure atm 16: Favorite place: my beddddd or in cuddles 17: Favorite food: ITALIAN 18: Do I use sarcasm: No i rather speak to people in precise terms when they ask “what” to a dumb question. Jk, hell yeah im sarcastic. 19: What am I listening to right now: Empty Camps by Cemeteries 20: First thing I notice in new person: Personality or Smile. 21: Shoe size: 7 22: Eye color: Brown 23: Hair color: Black 24: Favorite style of clothing: My own kind of style 😋 25: Ever done a prank call? Yes 😑 27: Meaning behind my URL: I like psychedelics and weed and i love to love, plus i dont sleep 😂 28: Favorite movie: I dont really watch movies tbh 29: Favorite song: Luna of Claiming 30: Favorite band: Circa Survive 31: How I feel right now: Crazy 32: Someone I love: My dog ;-; 33: My current relationship status: She isn’t my gf and she is straight.. i am in love with her i guess…. i guess.. but she does not feel the same.. but she wouldn’t like it if i saw other people.. 😞im so dumb but its really confusing. 34: My relationship with my parents: My dad was abusive and me and my mom are alright, just not close like some moms and daughters are lol. Its weird. 35: Favorite holiday: Does the Fall count 36: Tattoos and piercing i have: Tattoo on my neck of 3 purple moons, Gages, and i have my mouth and nose pierced many times but i fucked them up or school in the past (bitchass dresscode) 😭 37: Tattoos and piercing i want: Split tongue, eyebrow, cheekbones, Chest piece idea i had since 8th grade, moon and sun on my arms with falling stars ending the shoulders, sunflower on my leg with an eye, many ideas tbh 😂 38: The reason I joined Tumblr: Stop posting my feelings and personal thoughts and agreements on other media with friends who just see me as a depressed whiney little baby so now they think im better cuz i stopped expressing to them how i feel ((: now they complain i dont talk and i need to.. too late. Thought i could trust them and that i would never be a burden how they arent for me .. i was wrong and for that here i am. But god i do love tumblr and i dont regrer it. 39: Do I and my last ex hate each other? Yes.. she doesn’t care about me and never did. How she ended it showed that evil shit i didnt want to see. Now idk.. 40: Do I ever get “good morning” or “good night ” texts? From lucero sometimes.. 41: Have I ever kissed the last person you texted? Yeah. 42: When did I last hold hands? I dont know 43: How long does it take me to get ready in the morning? Just to get ready i could get ready in like 5 minutes but if i have all morning ill spend it all changing outfits till my whole closet is rampaged 😭 44: Have You shaved your legs in the past three days? Not in MONTHS 😂 45: Where am I right now? My bed 46: If I were drunk & can’t stand, who’s taking care of me? Lucero..? My mom..? 47: Do I like my music loud or at a reasonable level? LOOOOUUUUD 48: Do I live with my Mom and Dad? Mom and stepdad 49: Am I excited for anything? I guess art if i make it 50: Do I have someone of the opposite sex I can tell everything to? No XD aint no dude wanna hear about my feelings unless he likes me lmfao 51: How often do I wear a fake smile? Everyday /: 52: When was the last time I hugged someone? Idk 53: What if the last person I kissed was kissing someone else right in front of me? Idk… it would break me.. but i should have seen it coming if it did .. 54: Is there anyone I trust even though I should not? No.. idk.. 55: What is something I disliked about today? Everything.. 56: If I could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be? My love. 57: What do I think about most? Being happy 58: What’s my strangest talent? I honestly don’t know lol 59: Do I have any strange phobias? Bugs bugs bugs ugh i reeeeallly hate bugs 😭 im scared a camera watches me idk if thats a phobia. 60: Do I prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it? Either or 61: What was the last lie I told? Im doing good c: 62: Do I prefer talking on the phone or video chatting online? Video chatting maybe idk maybe a call tbh idk ill freak out unless i known you foreverrrrr i csnt talk on the phone with anybody tbh. Or even talk idk Dx 63: Do I believe in ghosts? How about aliens? YESSS 64: Do I believe in magic? YESSS 65: Do I believe in luck? Sometimes 66: What’s the weather like right now? HOTTER THAN SATANS BALLS IN CALI 67: What was the last book I’ve read? Milk and Honey 68: Do I like the smell of gasoline? Yesss /.0 69: Do I have any nicknames? Le Dan Dan, Dannehhhh, Mac Daddy Danny, Nena 70: What was the worst injury I’ve ever had? Brain 😂 71: Do I spend money or save it? SPEND 😭🔫 72: Can I touch my nose with a tongue? Nah ): 73: Is there anything pink in 10 feet from me? No 0.0 74: Favorite animal? PUPPERRRRS 75: What was I doing last night at 12 AM? I don’t remember 76: What do I think is Satan’s last name is? Satan Natas 77: What’s a song that always makes me happy when I hear it? Capital Cities Safe and Sound 😂 78: How can you win my heart? Be there for me, take me on adventures, love me when i cant and let me love you when you feel you can’t.. be crazy wildin with me lmao. Patience with me. 79: What would I want to be written on my tombstone? Idk ): 80: What is my favorite word? “Nah” 😂 81: My top 5 blogs on tumblr: idunno ;^; 82: If the whole world were listening to me right now, what would I say? Treat me the same way i treat you, and we will see. 83: Do I have any relatives in jail? Not that i know of 84: I accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what’s even cooler is that they endow me with the super-power of my choice! What is that power? Self-trip on my own without needing tabs 😂 85: What would be a question I’d be afraid to tell the truth on? How do you feel 86: What is my current desktop picture? Ganja girl animation. 87: Had sex? Yes 88: Bought condoms? Yes 89: Gotten pregnant? Noooooo 90: Failed a class? Many 91: Kissed a boy? Yes 92: Kissed a girl? Yessssssss 93: Have I ever kissed somebody in the rain? Yes 😭 94: Had job? Yommmp 95: Left the house without my wallet? Many times 96: Bullied someone on the internet? Fuck no .-. 97: Had sex in public? Yes 😂 98: Played on a sports team? No 99: Smoked weed? ALL DAYY ERRDAYY 100: Did drugs? Why yes 101: Smoked cigarettes? Still do 102: Drank alcohol? Once in a while 103: Am I a vegetarian/vegan? MEAT LOVERRRR, Althought respect for vegetarians/vegans 104: Been overweight? Yeah. 105: Been underweight? Idk lol 106: Been to a wedding? Noo e.e 107: Been on the computer for 5 hours straight? Maybe 108: Watched TV for 5 hours straight? No 109: Been outside my home country? Once but mexico =.= 110: Gotten my heart broken? Yeah 111: Been to a professional sports game? Yeah i think 112: Broken a bone? Helll nooo 113: Cut myself? Yeah 114: Been to prom? Lol no i didnt go 115: Been in airplane? Fuuuuuuck noo 116: Fly by helicopter? I wishh 117: What concerts have I been to? Too anxious to attend one 😞 118: Had a crush on someone of the same sex? Of course 😂 119: Learned another language? Yeee 120: Wore make up? Yes 😑 121: Lost my virginity before I was 18? Yeah ); 122: Had oral sex? Yepppp 123: Dyed my hair? Hellll yeeee 124: Voted in a presidential election? Yomp 125: Rode in an ambulance? Many times 126: Had a surgery? Nopee 127: Met someone famous? Nopee 128: Stalked someone on a social network? Yeah xDDx 129: Peed outside? No e.e 130: Been fishing? No ;-; 131: Helped with charity? I am charity jk 132: Been rejected by a crush? Yeahh once xD 133: Broken a mirror? Yes ._. 134: What do I want for birthday? Loveeee Send me some? <3