#i had a whole comic planned but i do not have the spoons for that yk

[industriallyinsecure]

Could I please please PLEASE get some headcannons of la squadra and where they took their partner on their first date/favorite date?

I went with first date for this request :)

Risotto is planning this extremely detailed date that he believes is worthy of you, but at the same time brings him out of his comfort zone

(He has never been on a date before)

He’s genuinely surprised (and relieved) when you suggest a stay in date with little to no interaction with anyone except maybe the person who delivers the food

The two of you snuggle up on the couch, completely intertwined as you wait for your food to arrive

While chatting about the things he originally had planned , you called him chiocciolino (little snail) and praised him for trying something different and coming out of his shell

He’s never had a nickname outside of the affectionate shortening of his name or the horrible things he was called in his youth, so you earn a rare, yet small, smile from him

You spend the rest of the night nibbling on and sharing your food together while watching one of his favorite shitty horror movies on his old VHS player

(Everyone else comes home to see the two of you gonked out on the couch with the TV on and food on the low table. Formaggio calls dibs on not cleaning up)

Ghiaccio takes you to his favorite skating rink so he can show off for you

He only mentions he used to be a professional ice skater mid-way through your date

(Comes off a bit assholish, but he really just wants to impress you)

If you don’t know how to skate, or can’t very well, he uses the opportunity to hold you close and teach you

If you’re pretty good, he tries to flex on you

Either way, it ends with one of you busting your ass on the ice

Ghiaccio will be mortified, but you just laugh it off

When you ask him to do one of his old routines, he’ll blush furiously and claim to not remember any

Which is a lie

If you keep pressing, he’ll do it, but he’ll complain the whole time

He’s absolutely beautiful and graceful to watch, a far cry from the choppy, fast pace of Ghiaccio’s actions that you were used to

Melone takes you to a local contemporary restaurant

He likes new experiences and trying new things, especially with new people!

Absolutely makes small talk, compares zodiac signs, natal charts, etc.

Asks very strange, but thoughtful questions

They’re not the normal questions, but things like “What is your opinion on the housing crisis?” And “If you could be any plant what would you be?”

For lack of a better word, the first date with Melone is quirky

He shares his food with you, but just passes the plate over rather than holding out a spoon/fork like a creep

100% pays for your meal regardless of the price (his wallet is crying)

After, he takes you to get gelato and makes you pick a flavor you don’t normally get, and he does the same

All in all, a very traditional, vanilla date, but fun

Prosciutto plans the most extravagant date possible just to impress you

He dresses to the nines (not that you can tell the difference from usual) and wears his best cologne. He even puts on several of his favorite rings.

It’s too bad that the date goes awful

The exhibition he had taken you two had been taken over by environmental protesters

So he tries to take you to the restaurant he made a reservation at

Only for them to have never reserved a spot for the two of you

(He doesn’t blow up on them because you’re with him, but God does he want to)

With the date ruined, he decides to just take you back home and reschedule

As he walks you back to your apartment, a car speeds by and drenches both of you in a respectable amount of rainwater

When Prosciutto sees your shoulders shaking, he fears the worst.

But when your giggles get louder, he just gets confused

“I hope our next one goes better, Pro.”

You pull him into a brief kiss (and he imagines steam coming out of his ears and comical train whistling)

Pesci is trying to plan a date with you, and suggests almost everything but what he wants to do

So when you suggest renting a boat from the closest marina and to go out fishing, he’s over the moon!

He’ll grab all of his fishing things, much to the behest of Prosciutto, and the two of you head off

The two of you sit with your legs through the railing, the fishing rods casted

The day is filled with lots of catches and releases, and lots of pleasant conversations

If you have no experience, he takes the time to properly set everything up, carefully walking you through each step

If you do, it just makes him like you even more!

(Women want him, fish befriend him)

He almost drops the fishing rod when you lean your head against his shoulder

All in all, a very successful date

When he gets back, Formaggio and Illuso absolutely make some foul comments about how he smells like fish

(I don’t have the courage to write any here)

Illuso plans to take you to one of the only places he liked to go with his family as a child

Insists on getting ready with you, even helping you with your hair and makeup to the best of his ability.

(If you beg, he might let you style his hair)

The train and bus rides to Teatro La Fenice is fairly uneventful

His refined upbringing shows when he starts to talk to others in the theater, which is as shocking as it is interesting

You try not to stare as he puts on this rich person persona, but it’s genuinely amazing that he schmoozes an older couple into giving him their box seats

But the Illuso you know comes back during the orchestra tune up, snickering and making snide comments

The opera is long, and some of the nuance is lost on you, but Illuso had a way of picking it apart that made it funny to listen to

His ability to simultaneously make fun of it but also provide insightful commentary made the date a success

At least in your mind

You did fall asleep on him during intermission though

Formaggio honest to god forgets you have a date

So you end up at his apartment cuddling with his cat while he rifles through the phone book for delivery places

He considers himself lucky that you don’t rip him a new one

And, luckily for him, you’re very low maintenance. He would take offense to you not really having a high standard of him, but he doesn’t really mind

You don’t protest when he puts a football match on (a welcome surprise since he didn’t take you for a sports fan)

The two of you (and his kitty) snuggle up together as you wait for your food to be delievered

He’s only mildly betrayed when his cat moves away from him to soak up all of his attention

She’s always been fickle

But it’s a good sign that she likes you

The takeout is just okay, which both of you note, and definitely not worth the price

You end up falling asleep on the couch, and he doesn’t really know what to do. Does he move you to his mattress? Would it be weird to move you?

He ends up covering you with a blanket and sleeping propped up in the other chair because he felt guilty about using his own bed while you slept on the couch

[p0ssywhippedcream]

Ayo it’s 🐝 here for 🎟 time

So ik we were laughing at the idea of Saiki accidentally eating pot brownies (damn his sweet tooth) and the idea of a zooted psychic is either hilarious or a ticking time bomb lmao

He can’t read minds as well, if at all, he’s bumping into shit constantly, he already knows you enjoy baking so you won’t mind if he empties your kitchen, right? Yes, he did in fact clear out that tray of coffee jelly you set aside for your coworkers. He doesn’t look guilty at ALL either. He has the munchies, you have the skills to make more, no harm no foul (except there is because you were up all night making them perfect but that’s beside the point).

He’s also not too focused on hiding his powers I front of other people, and he nearly gives you a heart attack when he starts bending spoons and shit with the gang just upstairs.

Bro is staring off into space, he on a whole other planet. Your furniture is floating. People are calling down asking if the brownies are almost done. Send help

You feel like curling into a ball and rocking back and forth like crazy people in movies do. You know you’re going to be missing a considerable chunk of hair at the end of this adventure too because of the sheer amount of stress you’re under.

Saiki is in his own world, looking like the epitome of childlike wonder as he discovers the fabric of your cushions.

“Woah…”

You waddle over to him, hearing the happy chattering upstairs and taking it as a good sign.

“Saiki, saiki! Your powers are going off!”

Three kitchen chairs are levitating behind you, spinning wildly like loose shopping carts.

“Yeah… for real.”

You smack a hand over your face comically. “This is not a ‘for real’ moment, Saiki! This is a ‘shit your pants and run for the hills’ moment!”

“Right, right..” He tries to stand up from the coach and topples into the coffee table with a loud crash. The talking upstairs stops.

“Y/n, are you okay?” Teruhashi asks from the top of the stairs and you panic.

“Yeah, yeah! I’m great. Sorry I just uh.. dropped the cookies! Don’t worry about it, I’m cleaning it up.” As you speak, you drag Saiki to his feet by his armpits and drag him over to where your fridge is floating. You reach up and push it the floor slowly then lean him against it.

“You need to stay put, mister. Stay here!”

As you race up the steps to comfort your crowd, you smack into Yumehara.

“Oh shit, sorry!” You apologize and help her up.

“It’s okay,” She smiles, “I was just going to ask if you needed help baking because I thought we were going to have brownies?”

You make a face and then realize your mistake.

“Oh yeah,” You cover your frustration with a laugh, “I meant to say brownies but I was distracted.”

She smiles again but it falters when her eyes peak past your shoulder and see the wreck that is your kitchen. You quickly move to the left to block her sight and smile back nervously.

Once she’s left back to the waiting group, you rush downstairs and fill up a glass of cold water before splashing Saiki in the face with it.

“Hey, idiot! You’re ruining the entire day, how am I supposed to do all the fun activities I had planned if I’m babysitting a god?”

Saiki shrugs.

“Suffer, I guess.”

You sigh and shake your head. Looking around your messy house, you resign to ‘suffering, I guess’ for the next few hours.

[justafleckofpaint]

See the thing about the way my brain works is it needs. lots of reassurance and often not even that is enough

(I'd make this some sort of comic before posting but spoons are incredibly low. Bear with me here)

Let's use an example I run into a lot; sending anon asks.

The average person will probably type up what they want, revise it once or twice at most. By the time they've finished writing, they have more than enough assurance that anon's actually on; they can see it in the top left, and they saw it while they were typing.

But that isn't enough for my brain.

"What if I saw it wrong? What if anon was never on in the first place? My icon IS grey, so it looks similar enough to anon, how can I be sure?"

At first, taking a screenshot was enough reassurance! But then..

"What if I accidentally turned it off in the last moment? What if the screenshot's wrong? Computers are never perfect, it could've faked this!"

So then I had to start grabbing videos. I'll start up a screen recorder, type up the whole thing, hit anon, wait a whole five seconds, before setting my phone down on the nearest flat surface and hitting 'ask' the same way someone painstakingly looking for every single letter on a keyboard one at a time would. A single tiny poke, to take up as little space as possible, to minimize any chance of so much as grazing two inches close to the anon button.

And sometimes, even THAT still isn't enough.

Remember, "Computers are unreliable!" At that point, maybe my phone was just displaying things wrong! It happens all the time, people will think they picked one thing, when really they did something else. How can I be sure? Was it ever really on anon in the first place? "Tumblr is notoriously buggy and runs on spaghetti code!" This is another worry! Another thing that can't be controlled, only worked around, and at the end of the day I can't really do anything except painstakingly wait for the ask to be answered. It's.. honestly pretty upsetting, having to live with the uncertainty, so I'm not sure how I ever denied this was an issue in the first place. This is NOT how a healthy brain works. This is NOT normal. But.. there's not a lot I can do about THAT, either.

Earlier, I tried to see what would happen if I just.. entirely ignored the "proof" part. Just didn't grab the screenshot or the recording.

I don't think I'll be doing that again, because it made things that much worse. Which.. is admittedly pretty funny, but also, damn.

I don't know how to wrap this up. I don't know what I planned on ending this with. I guess I'll just say I am absolutely not beating the allegations and then. Raray on? (/inside joke)

[folk-ever-lore]

isekai

Bridgette groaned as she hit the ground. This akuma was taking everything out of her and Chat Noir. It’s powers were like something out of a comic book, perhaps something that one of the Gotham Rogues would have out of the DC comic books.

Bridgette - Ladybug - looked at her partner. “We can’t do this without a bit of luck, can we?”

“Yeah,” he nodded. “We definitely can’t do this without a lucky charm. I’m betting on a knife this time, M’Lady, you’ve had a spoon and a fork after all.”

“Haha,” she laughed sarcastically. “Very funny. LUCKY CHARM!”

A swirling portal of red and black opened up above them, forming from the miraculous ladybugs.

“Huh? That’s weird. I don’t think anything like that has happened before." Chat Noir said right before two figures, two people , fell to the ground in front of them.

***

Jason and Marinette were on patrol for the night - or rather Red Hood and Ladybird, two of Gotham's many vigilantes were. It wasn’t odd for them to be patrolling together, in fact they almost always patrolled together. The only times they didn’t was when one of them was either injured or needed elsewhere for the night. When they’d first started dating patrolling together it had been a bit weird, but now Gotham was used to seeing their resident ex-crime lord and one of Gotham’s rare Batman accepted metas patrolling together.

They’d just finished stopping a robbery when a red and black swirling circle opened up beneath them. A portal maybe?

They fell through it, falling onto a sidewalk a moment later.

This clearly wasn’t Gotham. The sun was out for starters. Marinette looked around as she stood up to see if there was anything recognisable in the nearby area. Was that the Eiffel Tower? And who were those strange people dressed up like animals?

“What the fuck was that?” Jason asked rather pointedly.

Marinette stared at CatBoy and SpotsGirl, “And who the fuck are they? Paris doesn’t have superheroes.”

CatBoy huffed, “Well obviously Paris does have superheroes. We’re right here. Ladybug and Chat Noir at your service.”

Jason ignored the young ‘supers’, “Are we sure this is actually Paris? It’s too bright, even for the City of Light, and it feels more cartoonish than usual.”

“I noticed that too. The whole place feels off.” Marinette confirmed for her boyfriend partner. “Want me to take a quick fly around to get a better idea of this not-Paris place?”

“Sounds like a plan.”

Marinette shot up into the air to survey the area, leaving Jason alone to entertain the kids.

CatBoy - Chat Noir - spoke up, “Who are you? Who’s that?”

“Red Hood. She’s Ladybird.” He said gruffly.

SpotsGirl, he refused to call her Ladybug, snorted, “What? Like the characters from the comics?”

What comics, he mentally asked himself. “No. Like the ex-crime lord and Superman’s daughter.”

“Yeah, as I said,” SpotsGirl laughed, “like the DC comics. Jason Todd and Marinette Kent right?”

“How do yo-”

“Don’t worry,” said SpotsGirl with a reassuring tone to her voice. “It’s nothing to be ashamed of by naming your hero personas after some fictional superheroes. After all, RedBird is like my OTP.”

Marinette floated down from above after finishing her assessment of the city. “Kid, neither me or Hood over there are fictional. We’re real life vigilantes from Gotham.” She spoke gently, taking time to take care of the young girl’s thoughts and feelings.

SpotsGirl shook her head furiously, “Gotham isn’t real. It’s a fictional city in the DCEU. I can prove it, let me google it.”

When the young girl showed the results to the couple they couldn’t believe their eyes. “What the actual fuck?” Jason muttered. “Is this some sort of alternative universe?”

Marinette shrugged, “That would explain a lot of what I saw. This version of Paris still gives off major cartoon vibes.”

Jason groaned, “Just our luck. We go to a universe where our home doesn’t exist.”

“We don’t exist here,” Marinette blanked as the realisation came to her. “We’re fictional here. Ain’t that right kiddo?”

When they got no response they turned to look for the young superheroes. “Where are they?” Jason muttered, “The little shits tell us we aren’t real here only to disappear?”

Marinette shrugged in return, “Well apparently they are the local superheroes around here, maybe they had a villain to fight.”

“I suppose that’s fair,” he replied.

“Want me to fly us to them?”

“If you’re up for it.”

“Seriously Hood?” She lamented, “We got sent to a different universe, I’m not injured.”

“OK then.”

And that was that. It didn’t take them long to find the kids.

As Marinette touched down on the floor Jason couldn’t help but laugh a little. “Turns out they did have to go off to fight a villain.”

“Yeah,” she said, “but WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT?” Marinette gestured to the villain of the day. “And why do they look like a mix between Ivy and the Joker?”

SpotsGirl, who must have noticed the yelling, had made her way over to the Gotham duo. “That’s cause the villain is based on Ivy, Hawky really isn’t the most creative. He’s used one of the same akumas over one hundred times now.”

Jason shrugged, “To be fair to this Hawky, most of the villains in Gotham don’t change their shit up much either.”

“That still doesn’t explain why it kinda looks like the Joker,” Marinette stated.

“Oh, right,” SpotsGirl nodded. “Hawky is either colorblind or makes every akuma ugly in the hopes that it’ll damage our eyes enough that he can steal our miraculous.”

“Honestly, valid. One time when Ladybird was insulting Riddler he just admitted that the green was an attempt to blind us.”

Marinette frowned. It couldn’t be. Could it? “Hey Hood, aren’t the miraculous the names of the weird Green Lantern rings like jewellery in the show Dick watches with Mar’i?”

Jason blinked at her for a few seconds, “Huh. I think you’re right.”

“So we’re fictional here? But in our world SpotsGirl and CatBoy are the fictional ones? You gotta be shitting me.”

“Could you stop calling us that?” SpotsGirl Ladybug asked politely as she fought off one of Joker!Ivy’s plants.

Marinette winced, “Yeah, sorry about that.”

“It’s fine,” Ladybug waved them off. “But some help with the akuma would be nice, if possible.”

“Sure.”

***

“So let me get this straight-” Marinette started before she was cut off.

Jason snorted, “You can’t do anything straight.”

“Well neither can you,” she stuck her tongue out at him. “You’d just broken up with Roy when we met.”

“Yeah, well you had a crush on Cass when we met.”

“Yet I still ended up with you,” she retorted. “Anyway, let me run this bi you, this dude has the butterfly miraculous and he uses it to turn ordinary civilians who are feeling negative emotions into mind controlled supervillains?”

Chat Noir nodded, “Yep, unfortunately. It’s very annoying. The whole city has been held as emotional hostages for years.”

“Years?” Ladybug nodded at Red Hood’s words. “Damn. That’s gonna seriously damage people’s development.”

“It already has,” Ladybug informed the vigilantes, “that’s why we were hoping you could help us for however long you’re trapped here. As we saw earlier you clearly won’t go back with a miraculous cure like all other lucky charms do.”

Marinette and Jason shared a quick glance before agreeing. “Maybe the magic will send us home after he’s been defeated.”

“Hopefully,” Jason agreed with his girlfriend. “But what can you tell us about akumas?”

“We haven’t watched many episodes of your show. Mar’i prefers watching them with Dick.” Marinette states casually.

Ladybug nods, “There’s been many types of akumas in the past. It'd be impossible to name them all, but the Ladyblog should have videos from nearly all of them on.”

It may take all night, maybe more, but Ladybug and Chat Noir start their run down on akumas.

“What do you mean a mime sliced the Eiffel Tower in half?” Marinette demanded, “That's fucking crazy."

“Some pigeon guy was akumatized how many times?” Jason asked.

Chat Noir shrugged, “Honestly, I’m not too sure. I gave up counting after one hundred.”

“You gotta be shitting me.”

“Nope.”

“Santa? Was a villain? Now that just sounds like some sort of crazy cartoon bullshit to me.”

“Well according to you this is a cartoon,” Ladybug huffed.

“I refuse to acknowledge that someone here also weaponized nightmares,” Jason muttered under his breath.

“Also?” Chat Noir inquired.

Marinette nodded sadly, “Scarecrow is a bitch.”

“He definitely was in the comics,” agreed Ladybug, in a cheeky attempt to get back at them for the cartoon comment from earlier.

***

Marinette and Jason had been in Paris for a couple months. Unless there was a major akuma attack they mainly worked behind the scenes in order to figure out how Hawkmoth was. It was helpful to have Marinette fly after the de-evilized butterflies. What that meant was that they were pretty close to having definitely proof on Hawkmoth’s identity.

Which was why it was rather concerning when Bridgette got sick. How were they meant to defeat the supervillain, who they were pretty damn sure was Gabriel Agreste, without their Ladybug?

Adrien was at school when the akuma alert went off which meant he had to find some sort of excuse to get away. But Marinette and Jason had been taking care of a sick Bridgette who was in no state to fight.

“Take them,” Bridgette pulled the earrings from her ears and handed them to Marinette. “You look enough like me to pass as me. Hawky won’t know a thing.”

Marinette gasped, “But they’re yours. I can’t just use them.”

“Yes you can,” the sick girl insisted. “There has to be a Ladybug in order to reverse the damage, and I can’t fight like this. Please Marinette. You have to.”

Marinette groaned, “Just until you’re better. Okay?”

“Okay.”

When she transformed, Marinette’s first course of action was to head towards the akuma attack, because she totally hadn’t missed being in a fight since she’d come to this weird, cartoonish world.

As she ran along rooftops she used her yoyo to message Chat Noir. She figured just sending hi it's ladybird today would be enough. He’d get the message and no one would be able to figure out what it meant.

When Ladybird dropped down, in a suit identical to Ladybug’s, she couldn’t help but grimace at the akuma. “What the FUCK is that color scheme?” She yelled at Reflekta.

The pink clad supervillain stared at the fill in superhero. “Who are you and what have you done with Ladybug?”

Ladybird smirked, “I’m Hawkmoth’s downfall. Who are you?”

Reflekta looked down at Ladybird, “I’m-”

“Well I’m cunning, ultra charming Chat Noir.”

Ladybird snorted, “Sure, kitty, keep telling yourself that.”

“Hey,” he squealed. “I’m charming.”

“Sure.” She nodded over towards Reflekta, “Come on. We have an akuma to defeat.”

***

By the time Bridgette was better they’d got definite proof of Hawkmoth’s identify.

“Sorry Adrien,” Marinette cringed as they met on the Eiffel Tower. “It’s definitely him.”

The boy sighed, “We already knew it was. Now we can stop him.”

“Together?” Bridgette asked tentatively.

“Together,” they all echoed.

***

CRASH!

Ladybird crashed through Hawkmoth’s window, Red Hood in her arms with his guns out. While Ladybug and Chat Noir were fighting against Mr. Pigeon again they were weakening the actual enemy.

“Hi Hawky,” she grinned. “Or should I call you Gabe if that’s easier for you?”

“Who are you?” The supervillain demanded, withdrawing the sword from his cane as he spoke.

“I’m the person who replaced Ladybug the day your akuma asked about Ladybug being replaced, and this is Red Ho-” Marinette glanced down at his sword, “What the fuck, that’s hilarious. That’s like one of those pathetic fencing swords.”

Hawkmoth frowned, “It’s a noble sport.”

Jason laughed as he took a few warming shots, each getting closer to the villain’s head. “Sure it is.” None of the shots before had been intended to hit - when Jason aimed towards the villain’s left leg, he gracefully moved out the way just in time and brought his surprisingly sharp baby sword down on Jason’s arm with a carve to his arch. Blood dripped from Jason’s arm to the floor.

It was all Marinette and her super hearing could hear. Drip, drip, drip. Drip, drip. Drip, drip, drip, drip, drip. Drip. Drip, drip, drip. Although she theoretically knew that Jason had endured much worse, hell he’d even died, that didn't stop her from worrying about him.

Ladybird's eyes glowed red as she glared at him. She desperately wanted to ‘accidentally’ burn some of his face as she delayed for time to give the final duo of their group of four a chance to arrive. “Give me one good reason as to why I shouldn’t burn your face off right now,” she demanded.

“Because if you kill me all the bombs I have set up in here will go off killing you too,” he informed them with a look of great pride in his face.

Jason snorted, “Been there, done that. Minus ten out of ten, would not recommend dying.”

Marinette ignored her boyfriend’s terrible sense of humour and smirked, “We got Adrien to disable those ages ago. He was more than happy to comply.”

“He wouldn’t do that. He wouldn’t betray me like that.”

“Actually,” Chat Noir started as he and Ladybug descended from the elevator, “I would definitely betray you.”

“You? What?” Hawkmoth asked, clearly rather confused and frozen in shock. “Adrien?”

“That’s me,” the cat dressed superhero replied as he landed right in front of his father. “I’ll be taking those, thank you very much,” he said as he snatched the remaining miraculous from the man in front.

“For something I’ve been waiting for the past couple of years, that was rather anticlimactic,” Ladybug stated with a hint of laughter, enriching her voice.

“Speak for yourself,” Jason huffed with a slight grin on his face. “But a little healing cure would be rather nice around now. Don’t you think?”

“Course,” Bridgette replied unsteadily as she threw her lucky charm into the air. “Miraculous Ladybug!”

***

Five months. It had been five months since Hawkmoth had been defeated and sent to jail. It had been five months since villains had stopped terrorising Paris on a near daily basis. It had been five months since Bridgette Dupain-Cheng and Adrien Lahiffe (formerly Agreste) had said goodbye as their friends flowed red and were transported back to their own dimension.

Although Adrien hadn’t formerly been allowed to read comics, he and his girlfriend Bridgette had been binge reading all the DC comics together. The Red Hood or Ladybird issues were their favourites. But it wasn’t until the latest Ladybird comic came out that they had spotted a small Easter Egg in the background. At the end of the issue Red Hood and Ladybird had clearly retired to their apartment after stopping one of the Joker’s more nefarious plots and they were watching TV.

Or more specifically, they were watching a TV show about Bridgette and Adrien (more Ladybug and Chat Noir but who cares). As they saw themselves in the image, the couple couldn’t help but smile. Their friends remembered them.

[eldritchmochi]

b m u y ! letter ask game

B - A pairing–platonic, romantic or sexual–that you initially didn’t consider, but someone changed your mind.

i fully blame seize and gem for getting me on the shadowidomauk train, regardless of the teif personality. seize especially has me in a chokehold re: their lucien and essek combo in one of their fics, which i have not read nor do i even know if its been posted but they keep sending me snippets like MOCHI YOU WILL LOVE THIS IT HAS ALL* YOUR KINKS and by dog they're right (*it is not actually "all" this is impossible as i have Too Many Kinks but)

also gem's essek-owns-a-boujie-coffee-shop au that has shadowidomauk as end game is cute as shit im sorry gem that i haven't had the spoons to edit more (its so good aaa)

M - Name a character that you’d like to have for a friend.

i answered M with "ashton" over here in this post the other day but another character i would want to be friends withhhhhhhh hmmm lets say asterion. no i have not played the game but from the lore i have absorbed via cherry he is very much the kind of gay i would have fun having catty gossip with while also being the sort of rock for him to lean on and like..... not therapy him i hate being peoples therapist but the immovable object he can bounce trauma off and figure out How 2 People again. i think he would appreciate my bluntness and the way i set clear, explicit boundaries but am otherwise unflappable, and i would certainly appreciate his humour, and we can bond!! over the whole being ace as a result of trauma!! :D

U - Three favorite characters from three different fandoms, and why they’re your favorites.

answered U over here with ashton, kylo, and bucky over here but lets do it again!!

lets kick it off by going Old School with the Original Husbando ^TM: vash the stampede. you have no idea how jazzed i am about the new trigun anime (no i have not watched it i merely enjoy the smut on twitter) because vash is like, my og blorbo. did i have blorbos before? yes, kind of, but my Wants in a man* (*fictional character) had not yet developed so they were but proto-blorbos. vash tho... he has it all: tall pretty boy happy go lucky twink who is secretly Full Of Trauma but shoves it down super hard by being just so upbeat and goofy, and just really wants..... love and peace lmao. a lot of my blorbos historically have similar vibes in the "puts on an act to cover deep severe trauma" way lmao

next up: more anime i guess, but modern: i honestly super fucking love all might???? like SO MUCH he is such an interesting character and i desperately want to read fic of him grappling with his severe health issues alongside his image as a hero AND his mentoring of midoriya (preferably with that guud guud smut, but i have no clue who i'd ship him with, i only got two seasons in lmao). unfortunately, everything i like about him isnt even in cannon its just stuff that i, a cripple, can extrapolate from the worldbuilding and lil snippets we get of him but MAN i am o b s e s s e d

third!!! more comics: loki, specifically the agents of asgard loki. i am 100000% planning to cosplay that loki (i have the hair after all) and i am very excited because he is just so very Gender. it was the first time i saw a genderfluid character in mainstream media and his "i AM gender queer, i IDENTIFY as a bitch" like is something i quote constantly to describe my gender. also hes just such a dick who is obviously trying to do better and unlearn bad habits and god, i dont remember specifically what its about but he has a big fight with his earthside contact roommate buddy helper person over something and then comes crawling back and does this big speech where he talks about how he knows hes a fuck up but he's trying and he values her friendship so much even if he's been shit about showing it and it is chefs kiss

Y - What are your secondhand fandoms (i.e., fandoms you aren’t in personally but are tangentially familiar with because your friends/people on your dash are in them)?

dragon age. just... i know so much vague dragon age lore from listening to cherry talk about it because it is their BIG love for video games (pending bg3..... not sure if itll overtake da but theyre very sad they cannot play it again til monday lmao). i absolutely instigated a convo with someone on okc asking if xyz thing was a da reference and i was rIGHT it secured me a date lmao

similarly, mass effect, batfam stuff, haunted mansion, nbc hannibal (dont ask me why its a fandom in law still i cannot explain), s8 infinity (???? i only know matcha blossom), the final fantasy mmo, taz......

you can ask me more of these letter questions!! i have much time to spare!! maybe!!!

[threewaysdivided]

🦈and 🦋 for the ask game?

(Fanfic Writer Ask Game)

🦈 Which character is the toughest to write?

Back when I was writing Arc I of Deathly Weapons, I used to say Robin but, now that I've moved to writing the whole Team more, I think that wooden spoon of dubious honour has passed to Conner.

The thing that makes Conner challenging for me to work with is that he just doesn't have as much starting material as the others. We shall set aside the unrelated YJ Comics, where Kon is a very different character with a very strong and distinct personality. He's a bit of a blank, which makes perfect sense in-universe because he's very new. He only has about 6 months of lived experience by the finale and that means he hasn't had time to build up the layers of in-universe history and memories that can be mined for nuance, call-backs, behavioral tics and personality foibles yet. Which is tricky for a writer like me, since I like to lean into that nitty-gritty granularity of canonically-supported character specifics to help distinguish everyone.

Deathly Weapons also takes place at a point where Conner's still in the process of growing from an archetype into a fully-realised individual, and something that makes it extra tricky is that his starting archetype is "Strong, Silent and Broody". Where other Literally-Born-Yesterday characters might be written as childishly talkative/ curious/ naive about the world, Superboy tends to be taciturn with a dash of impatient directness. He's not antisocial but he is socially inexperienced - he often participates by silently observing unless he has questions/ observations, and he tends to withdraw into himself when processing emotions (unless he loses his temper). That's a challenge to integrate into a written medium because it could be in-character for him to go a whole group-conversation without saying or doing anything, but if I don't do something to depict him then he starts to fade out of the story.

Part of that is finding stuff for him to do, which is also tricky because of his power-set. Physically, Conner is a super-strong damage-resistant close-quarters brawler (with some secondary reconnaissance abilities thanks to his super-senses): i.e. a tank build. The problem is, super-strong tanks are well-suited for the strategic niche of threat management and demolitions, but Deathly Weapons leans hard into the more spy/investigative type of mission storytelling - conditions where open combat and large-scale destruction are undesirable. If your stealth-squad is routinely toppling buildings or drawing the kind of heavy fire that it helps to have a tank "pulling aggro" for, then something is probably going wrong. It makes it hard to find a balance because the more competent the Team is at being a black-ops unit, the more they avoid the kinds of combat scenarios that play to Conner's unique strengths. Which, again, means I have to keep a closer eye on him during field-work scenes to make sure he doesn't fade out of the story or end up saddled with endless grunt jobs just to give him something to do.

I like Superboy a lot, and I hope I've got enough planned to pay him his dues in DW, but it is a challenge to balance a character who is interesting in non-verbal ways and best suited to open combat in a written-medium stealth story where he's not the central focus. He's a gem who takes a bit more work to foil for this setting.

🦋 Which character is your favorite to write?

Wally. Wall-meister. Wall-man. Mister Meep-Meep. World's dumbest smart person and most brilliant fool. A boy who admired his uncle so much he reversed-engineered a chemical formula and blew himself up with it to get superpowers.

100% Wally is the most fun character for me to write. He has a really entertaining narrative "voice" and it's one I can find quite easily, even in early drafts (possibly because - as someone who was also a teenage STEM-idiot - I read a lot of his sixteen-year-old bullsh*t as being similar to my own tweens-to-twenties bullsh*t.)

I've called Wally my "free entertainment" character before, because whenever I need to add levity to a scene I just drop Wally in there, let his leash out a little and leave him to amuse himself. He's a lot like Sokka from ATLA: the way he talks, thinks and engages with his environment and other characters is naturally endearing and charming to me. So many of my favorite incidental lines from the published and planned Deathly Weapons chapters are just descriptions of Wally doing, saying or thinking something:

"So?" Kid Flash seemed amused by the idea, "Throw in a couple of glares and hang him off a roof as usual. Problem solved."

Wally made a disgusted noise and was promptly ignored.

“Wasn’t he tied to a table?” “Yeah, and?” the speedster gave a magnificent shrug.  “He still is.”

“Nope.  Guy was out of it.  Besides,” Kid Flash shrugged the item on experimentally, colour eye-watering against his stealth-suit, “you know me: moves like a shadow.” The archer and the detective shared a look. “Sure thing, mister ‘ninja-boyfriend’.” He shot a wink her way.  “You know it.”

Wally put on his best skeptical face.

He so didn’t want to do this. Well, okay, that wasn’t true.  Part of him didn’t want to do this.  Another - louder, guiltier - part very insistently did.  The rest… mostly just wanted to find a hole to curl up and feel stupid in for a while.

The stupid-hole was looking better and better.

Wally, meanwhile, had returned with a long-handled spoon.  He twirled it in a hand, sizing the plate up with a speculative look.

“Souveni-” “No.” “Oh come on, look at the little guy!”

The thing I like about my favourite iterations of Wally is that he's an earnestly good person. When you peel back the layers of insecurity and class-clownery and teenage nonsense he's someone who cares... and sometimes his flaws come from caring too much about the wrong things. He doesn't always come off looking the best (especially in DW's Flashpoints-Equilbrium set, where we're going to be unpacking some of his roughest character traits) but to me he's someone who genuinely wants to do right by people, even if he puts his foot in things a lot along the way.

He's also just... really funny about it.

Thanks for playing!

[gwydionmisha]

Personal: 12/6/22

It has been a complicated several days, made worse by my chronic stuff.  I spent a couple of hours on rheumatologist paperwork on Saturday and did not finish.  Sunday, all we really managed was food shopping.  Monday...  Monday was a mess for reasons that were no one's fault, small things making larger and larger disruptions in plans like an avalanche.  It was grueling for me, horrifically exhausting and painful, made worse by it being a treatment day.  There was no help for it.  Things needed to be done so they were done.  It involved things like, standing twenty minutes in a pharmacy due to multiple communication errors on a day when even a trip from my bed to the bathroom was a painful and dangerous adventure.  Long hobbles through various stores.  I trip up and down four flights of particularly dangerous concrete stairs.  no close parking anywhere except the place with the stairs, so long dangerous hobbles across parking lots.  I burned the whole amount of gas I expected to spend for the week in one night, and these treatments mean double the normal gas consumption for the duration.  I am curious to see how i pay for all these medical travel costs.

It was absolutely no one's fault.  It was borderline comical as Thompsons go, like some sort of comedy routine.  Sometimes the only way out is through.  This was one of those times.

I burned most of this week's spoons I suspect.  This is a no-functional level of pain.  I've treatment and errands again tomorrow.  I am afraid to bump up pain relief any higher lest unpleasant hallucinations follow.  

So this is why I didn't post the pre-election aggregate Tuesday morning.  I came close, but I needed to lie down.

Fuck if I know what posting will look like this week, given the givens.

On the upside, I won more hours for Head Millennial, to our mutual benefit.  I definitely need them.

* My family traditionally calls that thing where miscommunication leads to long complicated, exhausting and time consuming unasked for adventures a “Thompson.”  EX: "Meet me at 8 at the KFC.”  There are two KFCs on opposite side of town.   Both people travel back and forth frantically searching for the other for hours never finding the other or only doing so after hours and hours are wasted.  Or perhaps one person likes AM and one person thinks PM.   AM person eventually gives up .  PM person waits for hours.  You get the idea.  It also apples to things like drove for hours to get somewhere and have to turn back and do it all again because you forgot something essential.  We had examples of both types Monday.  Seriously, nobody’s fault.  Sometimes you just have to throw up you hands and laugh.

[captainhysunstuff]

Transcript:  The Chain - Light Crisis

The Chain - Light Crisis comic

Light:  *thinking* Geez.  How could this happen?  Why did I allow things to escalate this far?  ...Who am I kidding?  I wanted to kiss him.  I shouldn’t, but I still do.  This is awful.

Yeah!  It is!  I shouldn’t even be considering his suggestion to “run away.”  Not seriously, anyway.  I can’t!  What would my dad think?  Me wanting a relationship with his boss.

Soichiro:  Keep trying.

Matsuda:  Sorry, Chief!

Light:  *thinking about Soichiro’s disapproval* That sounds like his problem.

It’s beyond inappropriate!

I’m chained to a weird ass genius detective who thinks I’m Kira.  This has been grossly inappropriate the whole time.  What’s playing with him and developing feelings for each other on top of that?

I have a girlfriend!

...That I’m gonna dump the first chance I get.

Fine.  And what if I do go through with it when this is over?  What if it’s not genuine?  If our hormones are just going crazy from being around each other so long?  What if it doesn’t last, and I want to leave?  Without the task force around... he’d have a huge advantage over me.  *starts hyperventilating* Isolate me.  Imprison me again.  HE COULD--

L:  Light-kun.

Light:  Eh?

L:  We should take a break.  Let’s go to the kitchen.

Light:  Yeah.  ...Sure.

L:  *spooning a ton of hot chocolate mix into a cup*

Light:  Henh, might be faster to just dump the whole can in there and call it a day.

L:  Measuring with spoonfuls is more exact.

Light:  *laugh* That’s fair.  *thinking* Okay.  Calm down.  Improper as it is, it’s not the end of the world, I guess.  L may be powerful, but he’s still just a guy.  A  human being.  Even in the event that he tries to pull something, I’d be able to handle it.  He’s willing to listen to me.  He didn’t even make a big deal of it when I didn’t follow through last night.

He can’t make me do anything I don’t want to do.  The closet he’s gotten was sitting in on his plan with Misa.  Even then, I managed to “officially” end that with Dad’s help.

And the imprisonment thing...  He’s made it clear that he doesn’t want to lock me up, even on the off chance he can somehow prove that I am Kira.  Doesn’t mean he won’t, but I could probably get a favorable outcome from that, too...

*blushes* And besides that... the fact that he is so powerful and dangerous... is kind of exciting.  Why lie about it.  He excites me.  That’s never happened before.  I... want to see where it goes.

*nods* Yeah.  You know what?  Fuck it.  That settles it.  Sorry, Dad (but not really).  I want this.  I’ve been “perfect” long enough.  I’m an adult.  I can make my own decisions, and as long as I’m careful...

L:  What are you smiling about over there?

Light:  This is just really good hot chocolate.  Really hits the spot!

L:  It had better be.  This stuff is expensive.

Light:  Ha!  Like you care, Mr. “I built a skyscraper to solve a case!”

L:  It’s a very important case.  *thinking* He’s in a better mood now.  Good.  ♥ 

Light:  What are you smiling at?

L:  You’re right.  The hot chocolate is really good today.

Light:  Can you even taste it now??   

[duskkodesh]

I had to subject someone I love to the Morbius movie. Thoughts that eluded me before (Spoilers ahead. Duh): They really wasted like five minutes on that terrible opening scene with the bats. This was a real decision someone made.

This kid looked NOTHING like Leto. Like I get there’s some suspension of disbelief but this kid has SO MANY freckles that Leto does not have and like... concealer is a thing. Why didn’t they at least make sure they looked alike?

Not a single person in Greece speaks Greek.

Imagining the horror of everyone around me calling me the name of the now dead people who got my room at a treatment center before me.

Why... why the untied shoes? He is a doctor. Give him loafers or crocs or oxfords that HAVE NO LACES. Does the director think that disabled people just wear their shoes untied?

Oh the CGI looks worse outside of a theatre. I watched it in digital XD and this is still wayyyyy clearer and that does not work in its favor. 

Let’s be real here. Legit Morb prolly didn’t even test on mice. He doesn’t think that far ahead. He just went right to self trials.

I hate that I fuckin want his coat but black and purple is my jam. (Sidenote, real Morb would be dressed like Matt Smith’s character. Looking like he crawled from the seventies.) 

You know the fact that this Martine is complicit in this test as opposed to the comic version who was lied to really kinda makes her morally dubious. Like shit, maybe don’t inject your coworker with weird substances on a boat when he asks?

Movie Morb honestly shakes during the transformation scene but... seems to be in no pain. Comic Morb screamed so badly from pain that his buddy shut the test down against his wishes. This is a shitty change.

The lack of actual blood in this movie is a crime committed against the viewer.

The 2019 comic did this attack sequence on the boat better and that was with still 2D images. 

Okay, comic Morbius jumped off the boat to kill himself. That was literally why. So... why did this Morbius jump off the boat? Why know he took the vials with him so... he’s planning on surviving. He coulda just taken a liferaft or hidden on the boat. It’s giant. 

In the scene when he’s off the boat and back in the lab and his legs do the wobbly thing HE STILL HASN’T TIED HIS SHOES?! Next scene when he’s jumping? Shoes are tied and honestly I think they are diff shoes. Echolocation scene? Shoes untied. Locked in the room scene? Shoes tied. At this point I feel I’m just being anal but honest to god I know someone in a wheelchair who likes cute shoes so she just asked me to tie them for her. No big deal.

Matt Smith really does carry this whole thing on his back like freaking Atlas, but also Stroud and Rodriguez are treasures and we were robbed of them. 

There is no consistency in this movie. Even things like the spoon in Martine’s jello cup move multiple times between shots when no one has touched it.

How is there THAT much staff in the building and someone just then finding the dead nurse?

Stroud really did get up about fifteen stories of a building in 20 seconds. 

These guys really saw Morb scale that stairwell and they didn’t have any kind of superhuman containment? Are Venom and Morb the only two supes in this particular universe?

Posters in the bus station: a guy outlined with the word Basilisk across him. Okay, well played. The Lion King? Disney no... Does... does that poster on the left say Demon-Fire? Okay props guys actually read the damn comics! Thomas and Kane. Oh. Oh my heart. Thank you props team! There’s another poster I can barely make out, “Blood of the Corrupt.” 

How the heck DID he get on that bus? How did he get his clothes back? 

Going from taking down pimps and rapists (Comic) to taking down counterfeiters (Movie) is a severe downgrade. 

Every bit of dialog after the diner scene does not match Morb’s speech patterns in the slightest. I cannot ever picture this man saying “Kicks everyone’s asses”

Lucien’s decorating is superb. Like the room that dance sequence is in? 10/10

The bar scene drags far too long. Run time is scarce, it would have been better spent elsewhere.

I still like Martine just freaking scolding Morb for going vampy and slapping the floor. Only thing better would be if she had a spray bottle of cold water and spritzed him with it.

The phrase ‘full Dracula’ should have been nowhere in the general vicinity of this script.

The character deaths in here just have no emotional impact. They feel flat, mostly because Leto doesn’t emote at all. Could they have used CG to make him actually look distressed? 

Also wow he sure stands there a hell of a long time after hearing Martine in trouble. Like... real Morb would act first and zero in on her WHILE running towards the noise. I don’t know how many times I have to reiterate that Morbius does NOT THINK.

This final fight is just as bad as I remember. So bad. Terrible.I am going to spend the rest of my life explaining to others why his powers do not work that way. They could have honestly played Voltaire’s Raised By Bats during the credits and they didn’t. The cowards.

“Based on the Marvel comics” Liars. The credits be like “Dr. Michael Morbius. Dr. Emil Nicholas... Martine Bancroft.”

[thessalian]

Thess vs Annual Leave Entitlement

I have a whole thing about annual leave. I mean, I get a pretty generous annual leave allotment, considering I'm part time. Then again, the amount I work, it's probably my due. Anyway, it is not that I don't want to take the annual leave. It's just ... I have a few issues about remembering to book it. The issues are:

Probably-ADHD Brain where when it is not staring me in the face, I will probably forget about it when I get to hyperfocusing on something like ... I dunno, actual work.

I tend to use "I JUST CAN'T TAKE THIS ANYMORE" as a bellweather that I need time off (probably a holdover from my temp days, when time off had to be planned way in advance and budgeted for because I didn't get paid leave), and I don't get to that point very often now that I don't commute and we've stopped having so many "unexpected absences" (and we're even hiring more staff, wow). So, again, I forget.

It's a lot easier to book annual leave when you have a plan about it. Because I work from home, it's not unreasonable for me to be one of the ones actually working over, say, the Christmas or Easter holidays, because at least I don't have to deal with the public transport slow-down that happens during all bank holidays.

By the same token, it's a lot easier to book annual leave when you can actually afford to go anywhere. I can not afford the money or the spoons to go anywhere. I took time off around October for some recovery time both before and after MCM Comic Con, because it was a scheduled thing I really wanted to do. Those are rare for me at this point.

So for all of those reasons, what tends to happen is that I get my annual leave allotment at the start of April, I book at minimum the week around my birthday off, and then kind of forget about it until management starts yelling about getting time booked. This normally ends up with me having a lot of time off around March, as I just dump the remainder of my leave allotment wherever there's still an open week or so left. Now, unlike Temp and her three-week holiday the other month, I at least try not to take more than a week off at a time. So what happened was that this March has me off for two non-consecutive weeks. The first one is next week, and I have plans in the direction of more baking. Probably chocolate chip cookies, snickerdoodles and a coffee loaf.

And then there's the week of the 18th, plus the 26th to burn one last day. And Horizon: Forbidden West comes out on the 21st. I did not in any way plan that, but clearly the universe wanted to give me something to do that week. And next week, too, as I not only plan to bake, but could spend some time finally getting an entire BG3 playthrough done before I go spending time in the Horizonverse.

Of course, then the end of March will be upon us and I'll have a whole new leave allotment to try to use up...

[oklahomapubliclibrarian]

Dog Man Day

What is Dog Man Day?

Dog Man fans of all ages are invited to join the supa epic event with activities and games. We'll play Dog Man bingo, a personality test, assess your sniffers, and more.

Dog Man is Go! That don't make no sense! But we like it!

I first came across this idea from a post from Ontarian Librarian. She was able to get a Comic Creator booklet and some other cool items to make her event a hit. I took a few of her ideas and made them my own but she is the reason I made this event.

I learned about Dog Man Day after Twenty Thousand Fleas Under the Sea came out. Scholastic made an event kit with lots of activities. I read through them and picked the ones I knew I could do. With the power of these two sources, I was able to put together a plan for my own event.

What I did to prepare

I would say that reading at least one Dog Man book is a requirement for running this program. I read up to Brawl of the Wild and I can see why the series is so popular. 

Staffing was simple. There was myself and two others. One was there for the first hour and the other was shadowing the whole event. For the activities I picked out, I would recommend two people for the majority of the event. 

I ordered two plushies for prizes at the event. One was Bark Knight and the other is Li'l Petey. They are in the background in a few of the photos below. The kids loved these so much.

I planned activities that were going to be set up around the room as well two group activities. I'll list them below with more links.

Activities:

Dog food

K-9 Sniff Test

Make a Dog Man headband

Puzzle

Paper Activities:

Word searches

Dog Man face cutout

Coloring sheets

Draw a comic

Set Up

The first table was the nutritious snack of dog food and a few books for checkout! I bought coco puffs and put them in some dog bowls we already had. I told the kids we didn't have any spoons because they needed to eat the food like Dog Man would eat it. One child immediately got on all fours and literally ate like a dog! Other kids used their tongues or hands to eat. I was very tickled by the idea of them eating out of dog bowls and they loved it too. You might be worried about have a huge mess to clean up afterwards as was I. However, I did a few patrols and picked up loose pieces and only found one that had been stepped on. It was surprisingly clean for the whole event. 

The next table is the K-9 Sniff Test. I put smelly things in colorful cups then put tin foil secured by a rubber band on top and poked some holes in it. I picked things that I could easily get and would be a bit difficult for kids to figure out. I collected their guesses and gave one of our plushies to the winner. This is the list of smelly things I used: lavender oil, orange oil, peppermint oil, pickle juice, soap/bubbles, cinnamon and coffee. We already had a few essential oils on hand and they worked very well. 

The next table had the supplies to make a Dog Man headband. This station was a huge hit. Every kid ending up making a headband and they were so cute. I did precut some yellow badges to help out the smaller kids but this was very easy to put together. 

I found this puzzle on Amazon and thought it was perfect for my event. The kids actually put it together twice. 

The last table was various paper activities and supplies for them. I picked out a word search, coloring sheets, Dog Man face cutout, and how to draw Dog Man.

 I also decided to write down the schedule on the white board in the back of the room. This worked out well for me to stay on task and it helped the adults to know what was happening and when. I would recommend doing something like this if you plan to organize your own event. 

Takeaway

This was a great event. There were a few moments that felt slow but the personality test and bingo got everyone excited. The majority of guests left after I announced the winner of the K-9 Sniff Test. The few that stayed finished putting together the puzzle and took extra coloring sheets home. I'll put on a similar event when the next Dog Man book comes out. 

[randomshyperson]

Wanda Maximoff x Reader - The Love Slideshow

Gif is from Pinterest, but thanks to whoever made it.

Summary: When you return to the Avengers Compound, you have the strangest news that your best friend is dating the microwave. As if that wasn't bad enough, Natasha pulls a prank and you end up with a slideshow to prove a point.

Warnings: (+16) brief angst just because they are idiots, Friends to lovers, kissing, lap sitting, teasing, heavy make out but no smut, love confessions, talk about self-value, insecurities, self-worthy, mutual pinning, bad jokes, and avengers being a big annoying family, very fluff || Words: 9.730k

A/N: This is, in many ways, a love letter to Wanda. And aside from the headcanons, it contains almost everything I really think about her relationship with Vision. I also wanted to write something smut-free at least once in a while. Soon we will return to our normal schedule because I have plans to write Professor! Wanda. Tell me what you think, if is good, if you think I should write a part two or nah. And p.s I appreciate you all.

All Works Masterlist || AO3 || Wattpad || Part Two

--//--

Usually, the road puts you in a good mood.

Beautiful landscapes and the movement of the car helped you think, but after escaping from a bunker underground, getting involved in a shootout that almost cost you your life, having to flee for four whole days, and still driving your way back, you were far from happy.

You just wanted to get to the compound soon, take a long shower and eat some warm food. Maybe answer a few questions from whoever was curious about the mission, and then fall asleep in a real bed for the first time that week.

You did this. You were wearing a comfy sweatshirt and finishing some good soup, figuring you could watch some sitcom before bed when a certain android suddenly came through the kitchen wall and almost made you knock over your plate with fright.

"Jesus, Vis, don't do that." You complained, receiving an apologetic look from the robot to which you just nodded saying it was okay.

"Forgive me for the intrusion, Miss L/N." He asked as you went back to eating. "It's good to have you back in the compound."

"Thanks." You muttered.

Vision shifted the weight of his feet half-heartedly and you raised an eyebrow at him. "Is there something you want to say to me?"

He gave a short laugh. "Actually, there is." He said, clearing his throat. "There' s a situation that I need assistance with. And well, naturally I sought out Mr. Stark at first, but he had a comical response and told me he had no way to help with it. Captain Rogers seemed uncomfortable with the subject, and I thought it best not to insist. Miss Romanoff told me to talk to you."

You swallowed before you spoke, your confused gaze on the anxious robot in front of you. "And why did she tell you that?"

"Miss Romanoff said that you participated in an infiltration mission two years ago where you retained specific knowledge of the subject." Vision retorted and you put your spoon down in the soup pot.

"You'll need to be more specific mate."

Clearing his throat again, Vis straightened his posture before continuing:

"First of all, you may not be aware of the new nature of my relationship with Miss Maximoff. In the weeks you have been away, we have officiated our romantic relationship and-"

You cut off Vis' speech with an incredulous laugh, thinking he was joking. The robot made a confused expression.

"A-are you serious?"

"Yes, Miss." He returned and you laughed again, shorter and drier. Locking your jaw, but leaving as neutral a face as you could you asked him to continue. "As I was saying, Miss Maximoff and I are in an affective romantic relationship. I have been, how can I put it, studying Wanda's reactions. She seems willing to reach a new level of physical intimacy, but as a synthesized, I don't have the same needs."

You wanted to dig a hole in the ground. You just mumbled that you were listening, and Vision kept talking.

"I have contacted the other Avengers about this occurrence, and in talking with Miss Romanoff, she mentioned that a few years ago you were working on a mission where your primary cover was as a sex educator, and that you would have the necessary knowledge to assist me." He continued. "Actually, it will be a double help. It has come to my attention that Miss Maximoff has never been in an intimate relationship, and I wouldn't want to do anything wrong."

You were going to kill Natasha. Honestly.

With a sigh, you stood up. You had lost your hunger completely.

"Vis, I..." You took a deep breath to keep from cursing at him. "I've had really tough weeks. Let's leave that conversation for tomorrow, okay?"

He hesitated, but then nodded and you forced a smile before you left the kitchen making your way back to your room in record time.

–//–

The next day you awoke to a soft weight on your bed.

"Wake, wake, sleeping beauty." Murmured a female voice in a teasing tone, and you murmured sleepily, opening your eyes to find yourself face to face with Natasha Romanoff - dressed in workout clothes - lying beside you.

"Get out of here, I want to sleep." You mumbled sleepily, closing your eyes again. Nat chuckled beside you.

"No chance, I want to know how the conversation with Vision went yesterday."

You grumbled loudly, sinking your face into the pillow. "My god I thought that was a nightmare." You commented getting another laugh as Nat moved to get out of your bed towards the wardrobe.

As you woke up, she separated a workout outfit for you. Reluctantly, you sat up in bed, yawning and rubbing your eyes.

"Why do you hate me, Natalia?" you asked and she just raised an eyebrow at you, tossing the clothes at your feet.

"Why do you say that?"

"Telling Vision to ask his sexual doubts to me? That was a really low blow. The fact that I call you my best friend." You explained as you took off your sweatshirt to put on your uniform. Nat rolled her eyes.

"Y/N, you really can't see the big picture can you?" she retorted, receiving only a confused look in return. With a sigh, she moved away to the door, "Let's run and I'll tell you why I'm brilliant and you'll be thanking me instead of whining, cry baby."

You raised your middle finger at her, but Nat just laughed, leaving the room.

After brushing your teeth, and stealing an apple, you left the silent compound - only you and Nat had woken up, and maybe Steve, but you didn't see him - and went running around the facility.

Many minutes later, when you were panting and sweating, Nat finally let you take a water break.

"Okay, feel free to explain the incredible reason you traumatized me last night." You asked as you opened the water bottle. Nat laughed, stretching her legs out beside you.

"Isn't it obvious?" She retorted smiling. "What did I tell you it was going to happen if you didn't make a move on your not at all platonic feelings towards Wanda?"

You almost choked on your water. But you pretended to be unaffected - which didn't work much because Nat could see your red cheeks - and just cleared your throat.

"I don't know what you're talking about." You grumbled, but she laughed shaking her head.

"I said you'd miss your chance." She clarified. "And what happened? Exactly what I said it would."

You rolled your eyes, sitting down on the floor and grimacing. Nat laughed at your behavior.

"If this is all about you wanting to say 'i told you so'..."

"No, Y/N." She cut in more gently. "You two are complicated, but I figured this time away would be exactly what you needed to build up your courage. The problem is that Vision made his move first."

You shifted your gaze to your own lap, your fingers tugging at the tips of the grasses on the ground.

"How the hell did that happen anyway?" You asked thoughtfully, and Nat sighed, taking a seat across from you.

"I have no idea." She said. "I was quite surprised when Tony told me. I think it started shortly after you traveled."

"No, it has to have happened before." You muttered. "Wanda is not exactly the kind of person who embarks on a relationship in such a short time. I just wish I had noticed it before..."

"And what would you have done? A pout like now?" Teases the redhead in front of you causing you to snort in irritation.

"Well, I would have said it's ridiculous to begin with!" You defend yourself. "Do we even know if he is capable of caring about her?"

Nat shrugged, thoughtful as well. "I just know it happened, and you need to pick up your game. I've tried to talk to Wanda about this, but she's not exactly willing to open up about her relationship with a machine to everyone. I get the impression that she assumed I was going to make fun of her."

"And you were."

"Absolutely, but that's not the point." Nat commented making you laugh weakly. "The point is that I realized, from these little attempts to get some information out of her, that there is an uncertainty there. I don't know why she got into a relationship with the microwave, but neither of them seems sure what they are doing. You still have a chance."

You sighed, resting your face on your knee as you hugged your legs. "I would have rather you had told me than hear Vision say that Wanda wants to sleep with him."

Nat laughed, making a cute face. "Sorry, detka, but I needed to see your reaction."

"I hate you."

"No, you don't." She retorted and you smiled, rolling your eyes. "I'm joking of course. It was just a perfect opportunity that came along for you to get more information about this."

"What do you mean?"

Natasha smiled. "It's like a spy mission, Y/N. Study it a little bit. Find out how it happened, why it happened. And if you have enough intel, you'll be able to make a decision that hurts as few people as possible."

"You are an evil genius, Romanova." You retort making her laugh. With a sigh, you straighten your posture, wiping your grass-soiled hands on your pants. "I'll think about it."

You offered your hand to help her stand, and Natasha pushed her shoulders against yours as you both started walking again.

"Don't look so sad." She commented. "The situation isn't ideal, but I know what I'm talking about. You still have a chance with her."

"I hope so, but if not, I can always leave the country." You joke, escaping Nat's pinch to go back running.

–//–

The kitchen of the compound was full when you and Natasha returned - the two of you laughing softly at the updates the redhead gave you about the past few weeks - but your laughter turned into an exclamation when two arms wrapped tightly around your shoulders.

"Wow." You exclaimed in surprise, wasting no time in wrapping your arms around the brunette's waist to keep the two of you from falling. "Someone missed me." You joked, receiving a giggle from Wanda as she pulled away only to look at you.

"You arrived and didn't even speak to me, moya lyubov." She commented almost annoyed, and you pouted.

"Forgive me, darling, it was so late I didn't want to wake you."

"I wouldn't have minded. I missed you." Wanda retorted looking at you so fondly that you felt your cheeks heat up. Her hands came down to yours intertwining your fingers together, and you could swear she was leaning in, but then a blue figure was appearing beside you the next moment, a stronger hug that almost knocked you backwards.

"Pietro, easy!" You heard Wanda complain, but you just laughed, letting go of her hands to hug your friend.

"Are all the Maximoffs gay for you?" Natasha sneered behind you before skirting around and leaving to join the others at the table.

Pietro loosened up the next moment, talking quickly about missing you, how the compound got boring without you around and how he was practicing new things with the others, and you laughed as you asked him to breathe and speak more slowly.

"You have no idea what's new, Y/N." Pietro began as he threw an arm around his sister's shoulders. "A hilarious thing has happened in the last few weeks. Wanda started-"

Wanda let out an exclamation, and a red thread of magic kept Pietro quiet as she removed his arm from around her shoulders, and cleared her throat.

"Stop spreading gossip, and let Y/N breathe." She asked quickly and was already pulling you away from the confused yet well-humored boy. "Come on, you must be hungry." She told you leading you to sit at the coffee table with the others.

You would have thought it funny that she avoided a subject you already knew about if it wasn't for the bitter feeling on the tip of your stomach. You wished the others good morning and avoided looking at Vision, imagining that he would have an anxious look about the previous evening's business, something you wanted to avoid at least at mealtimes.

Natasha seemed quite willing to do just the opposite.

She sat down in the chair opposite yours, while each of the Maximoffs took a seat next to you. You smiled in thanks to Wanda for passing you the toast without you even needing to ask, but your smile faded as you noticed the mischievous expression on your best friend's face.

"You know Pete, I updated Y/N on some things, but I left the best part out." Started the redhead, and the silver boy giggled, while his sister stood tense in the chair next to you.

"Y/N, you're going to love this one." Pietro then spoke up. "It happened a few days before you left, but Vision and Wanda are dati-

“-ing.” You complete with a forced laugh. "Yeah, I heard." Pietro was quite surprised, and you felt Wanda's gaze on you, but you didn't look at her right away. "An unusual couple, yes?" You joked feeling your stomach turn, Pietro laughed nodding.

"We're still trying to figure out exactly how that happened." Pietro continued. "Tony's bet is some kind of problem in Vision's algorithm, maybe a hacker attack and-"

"Shut up, Pietro." Wanda grumbled angrily, slamming her juice glass down hard and getting up to sit in the living room.

You sighed, ignoring the giggling of Pietro and Nat at a completely chaotic table, who hadn't even noticed that Wanda was upset, and stood up behind the brunette.

She sat down in one of the armchairs, a plate in her lap, but she was just poking at the bread without really eating anything. You put your hands in your pockets as you stopped beside her.

"What made you so grumpy, little witch?"

A small smile tried to leave Wanda's lips, but she bit them to avoid it, a move that immediately attracted your attention. If she noticed you looking, she didn't show it.

"Don't call me that." She retorted.

"But you love it."

Wanda let out a short chuckle, rolling her eyes. She mumbled something that sounded like "just because you're the one saying" but you weren't sure, and didn't insist, as you took up the armchair opposite hers.

"I wish I had been the one to tell you." She comments once you are seated, feeling your gaze on her.

"Why?"

"Because." She retorts, making you smile. You just stare at her for her to clarify further, and Wanda kept her gaze on her lap as she did so, "I just wanted you to hear it from me. I don't know, I didn't want you to get the impression that I was hiding things from you."

"And were you?" You inquired, and Wanda frowned, facing you again.

"No!" she said. "I mean... Damn, maybe. It wasn't like that."

You gave a sad chuckle, settling back against the armchair. "It's all right, Wands. I won't be mad at you for not telling me about your boyfriend."

"I wanted to." She defends herself. "I just...I didn't know-how. And it's something new, and I didn't know how you would react and..."

"Not so different from Pietro and Natasha, I assure you." You comment causing Wanda to become silent. She stares at you for a moment, a mixture of shock and annoyance on her face, and then swallows dryly.

"Well, if you're going to mock me too I'll eat in my room." She declared standing up. She was really upset, ears burning red, and hands clutching her plate tightly. You think she looked lovely.

You giggled, waving goodbye, which only seemed to irritate her more before she left the room.

You were thinking about finishing your coffee, when Vision approached your armchair.

"Miss L/N, perhaps we can continue our conversation from yesterday." He started but you widened your eyes, and stood up abruptly, giving an awkward little laugh.

"I have many tasks, comrade! I can't help you now. I'll talk to you later." You warned, and ran out of the room so quickly that you could have been mistaken for Pietro.

–//–

Wanda was avoiding you - and Pietro, Nat, or any avenger who wanted to torment her - and you were avoiding Vision.

After eating breakfast, and taking a shower to cleanse yourself from the run, you changed into comfortable clothes and decided to hide in Bruce's lab.

The scientist seemed well aware of the whole thing, and he chuckled when he saw you sneaking inside.

"Let me guess, running away from certain lovebirds?" he asked and you let out an annoyed huff.

"Don't call them that."

Bruce just laughed, shaking his head as he went back to his notes. You took the opportunity to circle around until you sat down on one of the stools.

"Is it okay if I stay around?" You asked, and the other Avenger shrugged, looking focused.

But you couldn't stay silent for long. "Hey, Bruce, if I had a hypothetical question involving hypothetical people would you hypothetically help me?"

The man laughed, nodding in the affirmative. "Go ahead, ask."

With a sigh, you tried, "In your professional opinion, what is love?"

Bruce frowned slightly, a little surprised by the question. You guessed he expected you to ask directly about Vision or Wanda.

Without taking his focus off the activity, he was thoughtful for a few moments. "Well, Y/N, for the field of biology, love is a chemical reaction in your brain. But you can end up having a variety of interpretations on the subject."

"What about from a robotics point of view?"

"I believe that is something you should ask Tony." He jokes, and you sigh, crossing your arms. The scientist takes off his glasses and turns toward you. "If you really want my opinion, and that is, from a biological standpoint, no Y/N. Vision is simply not capable of feeling love, or anything at all."

"And what other point of view is there if not that?" You retort, and the avenger gives a short smile.

"Well, maybe the one from the magic stone in his head." He clarifies. "Things have never been simple, and they're sure got stranger when gods and that sort of thing proved to be real. Maybe Vis can love her in a way other than the one you love her."

"I never said that-" You start to defend yourself with warm cheeks, but the look from the other Avenger makes you sigh. "Fine, you got me. B-but it's not just about my feelings. I want to understand what's going on."

Bruce nods, leaning on the countertop behind him.

"Well, despite the teasing, Tony was interested in the subject. Jarvis and Ultron were AI, unable to feel, because all a robot understands are binary numbers in its algorithms. Everything that's there was put there." He explains. "But Vision has something else."

"The stone is what causes these feelings in him, then?" You deduce received a nod. "Thank you, Bruce. I'm going to go talk to a certain God now."

Banner laughed, waving goodbye as you walked away to leave the lab.

Thor was almost always in Asgard, or off the earth, mostly to study the stones around the universe. Fortunately, last week he had come to visit his girlfriend and was in the compound for the next few days.

You found him illustrating the statue of Mjolnir in his room.

"Enjoying yourself, your highness?" You teased startling him, and the blond quickly covered the hammer, pretending not to be admiring it.

"Y/N! You're back!" He greeted with an awkward laugh, moving closer to hug you tight and consequently usher you out of the room, and close the door. "Good to see you, mortal."

You laughed, shaking your head. "Good to see you too, rain lord."

The blond rolled his eyes with amusement at the nickname but didn't correct you. "What can I do for you?"

"What makes you think I want anything?" You retorted making him chuckle.

"You have that determined look of someone who is up to something. Go ahead, say what you want."

You sighed. "I just want to know a little more about the mind stone."

Thor frowns slightly. "Oh, sure. I can help. But, why don't you ask Vision about it?"

You hesitate, but force a smile. "I'm on some kind of secret mission. I don't know if you're aware but he and Wanda are in a relationship now."

Thor grimaces then laughs. "What? That's the weirdest thing."

"I know, right?" you retort in the same tone. "But I want to understand where this came from, because it just doesn't make sense to me how this ended up happening in the first place."

"Wanda knows he's made of metal, doesn't she?" Thor tried thoughtfully, and you laughed humorlessly, nodding. "Mortals are weird."

"Very much so." You agreed. "Do you know anything about the stone that might explain how that happened?"

"Not really, other than what you all already know." Thor comments crossing his arms. "Six objects of power linked to aspects of the universe. The teachings of Asgard refer to them as superior beings, but they don't really possess a mind like my people or yours. I don't imagine that love comes from the stone, it's just a mystical rock. It doesn't feel anything."

You absorbed Thor's words in silence, and he was equally thoughtful. "But Vision can lift Mjolnir, right? I thought it was the stone that made him worthy."

The blond man laughed. "You can too and you don't have a stone on your head." He commented making you smile. "The stone is an object of immense power, greater than my hammer has ever carried. If the goddess of death can carry and destroy without being worthy, the singularity must be able to as well."

You nodded in understanding. "Thank you, Thor. I'll...try to organize my thoughts. But thank buddy, you've been very helpful."

–//–

Natasha and Pietro found you hiding on a balcony, a video on metaphysics playing as you dozed against the pillar.

"That's the saddest thing I've ever seen." Commented the redhead to the runner next to her.

"I thought you talked to her." He returned with a frown.

"I did!" Spoke the widow. "I think that's part of the plan."

"She intends to sleep and hide until my sister breaks up with toaster?" Ironized the silver one, receiving a short laugh from Nat before the widow kicked your feet lightly, waking you up.

You were startled, and your cell phone slipped from your hand to the floor below, but Pietro simply ran and picked it up at high speed, curious about the video you were watching as you rubbed your eyes.

"Are you really trying to find a logical explanation for the worst couple ever to form on the planet?" The boy asked, and you laughed humorlessly, stretching.

"I just wish I knew how to talk to the two of them about it."

"I think you're just looking for an excuse other than 'I'm in love with Wanda' to explain why you hate their relationship." Natasha retorted and you snorted softly.

"It doesn't matter." You muttered getting up and taking your cell phone back. "Now if you'll excuse me, I have to tell Vision that I can't help with sexual tips."

Nat laughed at Pietro's confused expression. "You don't want to know, fast boy."

With Friday's help, you asked the new couple to meet you in the meeting room in half an hour.

"Miss Maximoff has politely asked you not to speak to her." Informed the system on the first try, but you just laughed as you arranged the slides.

"Tell her it is not a postponable appointment." You insisted, and the AI was silent for a long moment before informing you that Wanda had begrudgingly agreed to participate.

Vision arrived before she did, and you had to ignore your own embarrassment and irritation to tell him that you weren't going to start explaining until Wanda arrived.

"Please, can we join in?" Someone said from the doorway, and you laughed as you saw Pietro and Nat standing there, denying it immediately with your head as you approached to push them away into the hallway.

"Get the hell out of here, I'm warning you two!" You spoke, but Nat was pushing back, pleading about wanting to see the reaction of all of you, and Pietro was quick enough to run from your hands. "You know what? Pietro, did you know that Nat has a secret sister? Her name is Yelena, she lives in St.Petersburg with the rest of Nat's secret family, and you two would be great friends."

Nat stopped struggling immeditately, widening her eyes and Pietro also stopped running only to jump at Nat the next second with a million questions.

The widow threw you a warning look, but you just nodded in farewell as she tried to run away from the speedster down the hall. You returned to the room, and within minutes, Wanda joined you.

The witch weirded out the lack of the other Avengers right away, but you had already closed the door behind her.

"Please, Wanda, have a seat." You asked seriously, and the brunette frowned, but obeyed.

"Y/N, what are you...?"

"I think this is my fault, Wanda." Vision interrupted the witch's question, standing up as you turned on the presentation. "I asked Miss L/N last night for assistance regarding the new phase of intimacy we are reaching in our relationship and-"

"Jesus, you did what?" Wanda cut in shock and indignation, standing up. You raised an eyebrow at the interjection, Vision had a confused expression completely clueless as to what had infuriated the witch.

"Dear, I explained to Y/N that as a Sintentized I have no experience with human needs. You might recall how disastrous my attempt to cook something was and..."

"Oh my god, that's not like cooking!" Wanda retorted angrily, and you sighed, gesturing to them.

"Please, I know the situation is awkward, but I would like to bring this matter to a close as quickly as possible. For the good of my mental health, just take a seat both of you."

Wanda hesitated, but a moment after Vision obeyed, she did the same. Crossing her arms with an angry frown.

You chuckled lightly before turning on the project. "I needed to make a timeline of events to understand exactly how we got here." You began, pressing the remote to start the presentation. "I started with the emergence of Vision."

Over the next few minutes, you briefly reminisced about Ultron's conflicts, the birth - if you could call it that - of Vision, and the recruitment of Wanda and Pietro to the team.

"Despite how close I am to both of you, neither ever told me there was anything going on that was more than friendship." You commented, and Wanda looked away to the floor almost guiltily. Vision straightened up in his chair.

"The nature of our relationship changed when you left, Miss L/N." The robot clarified. "Wanda and I were friends, and then, we were more."

You cleared your throat, wanting to push that horrible feeling in your stomach. "I see." You murmured. "And h-how did you realize you wanted to be more?"

Wanda shrank back against the seat. Vision smiled almost nostalgically, "Well, from the moment I met her, I've been attracted to her. I don't know how to find the right words, forgive me, but it's feeling, almost…”

"Magnetic?" You completed and Vision looked surprised, but nodded in agreement. Wanda raised her gaze to you, but you bit the inside of your cheek as you turned to the screen again. "Forgive me if I offend you in any way in this presentation, Vis, know that it is not my intention. I was just curious to understand exactly how, not one, but two artificial intelligence systems would come to the conclusion of love in your source code."

A graph of Vision's body appeared on the screen - notes on his compositions, software stability status, that sort of thing - and although the robot let out a short exclamation with a smile saying "look, that's me.", Wanda stood tense in her chair.

You moved the image of the graphic so that the focus was on the robot's power center. "There's no kinder way to say it, so I'll just say it. From a mathematical and biological standpoint, Vision is simply incapable of having feelings." You stated, and the android looked confused but didn't interrupt. "So I tried to look for a magical explanation for the thing."

Wanda didn't interrupt you, she wasn't looking at the presentation but you knew she was listening by the way she was curled up in the armchair, her fists clenched in her lap.

"I talked to Thor, and tried to gather some Shield files on this, but the conclusions weren't that different." You continued. "My opinion is that it has a connection to Wanda's powers."

She frowned, finally looking at you. Without hesitation you continued, "The Stone retains a comic signature. It is the one who gave Wanda her powers, and now, it is part of Vision's consciousness. It is natural for him to experience a magnetic feeling towards you, Wanda, because it is the mind's stone recognizing itself in your magic."

There is a moment of silence in the room. Vision is the first to speak. "Well, that clears up a lot of things then. Since I am not able to match your biological needs, I believe our relationship should come to an end, Miss Maximoff. We can continue a working relationship, but it must be strictly-"

Wanda stood up abruptly and threw you an angry glare before marching angrily out of the room.

You sighed and turned to Vis. "Dude, this is not how you break up with a girl."

"Wow, I'm sorry. Do you think I should apologize?" He asks and you gesture in the negative, handing him the control.

"Don't worry, I'll talk to her." You say. "Pack things up for me, please? I'll try to keep Wanda from destroying the floor."

But despite your expectations, when you reached Wanda's room a few minutes later, you didn't hear the sound of anyone furious. Only low sobs that were worse than anything else.

Knocking softly on the door, you wouldn't blame her for sending you away. But, seeming willing to totally surprise you today, Wanda opened the door.

The magical string faded into the air as you closed the wood behind you, the figure lying on the mattress with her face buried in the pillows made no mention of reacting to your presence, although the crying ceased.

You walked to the end of the bed, but didn't sit down, hesitating about what to do or say. Wanda was the first to build up the courage.

"Why did you do that?" she asked low and hoarse, and you swallowed dryly, trying to look at her face more clearly, but she was staring at the wall.

"I don't know."

"Bullshit." She accused bitterly. "You were mean for no reason."

"I didn't mean to be!" You defended yourself, almost deciding to shut up, and ask for forgiveness when Wanda looked at you angrily, her eyes swollen from crying, but her irises red with her magic. "Go ahead. Read my mind, you'll know I had no intention of hurting you."

"I don't want to! I want you to talk to me!" She retorted, her eyes returning to their normal coloration. But you gave a dry laugh.

"What am I going to say, Wanda? That I was surprised you started dating without telling me? Or that you waited for me to travel to do so, and didn't think for a second to write me about it? Or who knows, maybe we can talk about how the hell you ended up dating a piece of metal?"

"Don't talk like that!" She asked angrily, and one of the pillows flew right into your belly, but you caught it quickly, shaking your head in disapproval. "He is my friend! He's not... He's almost human but he's-"

"A machine." You insisted, returning the pillow to the bed, and kneeling on the mattress to approach Wanda. She curled up against the headboard, trying to control her tears.

"There's nothing wrong with loving him, Y/N." She tried softly, and you sighed, sitting down beside her. "He's good and kind, and he treats me so well. He-

"Can't love you." You retorted almost impatiently. "He simply can't, even if you both pretend differently. Just numbers and metal in his head, Wanda."

The brunette looked away, hugging her own legs. You sighed. "I just wanted to feel loved."

"Is that what this is about then?" You questioned in a calmer tone. "It breaks my heart to see you like this, sweetheart."

"Like what?" she challenged with a dry laugh.

"Hating yourself to the point where you think the shallow affection of a machine is all you deserve."

Wanda let out a tearful laugh. "You don't know what you're saying."

"Don't I?" You retorted in defiance, moving away from the bed. You went to her wardrobe, and pulled out a few long blouses from there, throwing them on the floor.

"What are you doing?" She questioned confused and impatient.

"I don't know what I'm talking about, you said. Well, let's start with the sleeves." You clarified, lifting one of the blouses to the height of your face. "You rip them off. Before, you wore gloves. But you've been dressing differently now, as less flashy as possible right, as Natasha taught us. I noticed it the first time you did. The same night you started practicing, the way you knocked Sam down over the tatami. I saw you hiding your hands at dinner."

Wanda choked softly, shaking her head in denial. "It doesn't mean anything. I-don’t-."

"I thought you were just afraid of what you can do because it makes sense, you're the most powerful of us, and it's scary not knowing how strong you'll get and whether you'll have control. But then I realized other things." You continued, returning the blouse to pile to walk closer to her again. "I noticed the way you dig your nails in until it hurt your palm. How you don't train with others if you can avoid it, how you're getting really good at hand-to-hand combat because you just don't want to use your magic."

"Stop." She asked softly, and you sighed as you sat back down on the bed in front of her.

"I notice you, Wanda." You spoke in a lower tone. "The way you can't accept a compliment, how you're always doubting yourself. Craving attention and affection like you're starving."

A few tears fell down her face, but Wanda quickly wiped them away. "Don't make fun of me..."

"I'm not!" You quickly clarify, moving your hands to entwine theirs, and resisting when she cringed and tried to pull away. "Calm down, you're not going to hurt me."

"You don't know that!" She cried, and you sighed before releasing her hands, only to hug her tightly. Wanda sobbed against your neck, trying to break the grip just for a moment before sinking against you.

"Wanda, I can't magically teach you to love yourself." You comment as you caress her back. "It's hard, long work. I can only promise to be here for you. Until you understand that there are people who love you endlessly. And that you are worthy of all that love."

Wanda shakes her head against you, her hands around your waist. She continues to cry softly, and you move to lay you both down together, without releasing your grip.

She cries herself to sleep against your collarbone. But you don't move or complain any second.

–//–

You wake up first. Your natural instinct is to move, but a gentle weight on top of you holds you in place. The room is dark, but you don't really need to see to recognize the smell of the shampoo from Wanda's hair, which is now against your neck.

Gently, you start stroking her back in an attempt to wake her up. A few minutes pass before she shifts against you, mumbling softly before tangling your legs together and pressing you even further into her body.

"Wake up, little witch." You whisper without stopping your caresses, your face a bit flushed red from the intimacy of the moment. Wanda blinks her eyes slowly, until she realizes the position and tenses. She turns away from you with a sleepy murmur of apology, remaining lying on the bed, and though you immediately miss her warmth, you say nothing.

"Please tell me that yesterday was just a nightmare." She asked looking up at the ceiling, and you gave her a sad smile, turning your body toward her.

"I'm sorry, Wands." You retorted, feeling bad for the way she swallowed dryly and didn't look at you again. Trying to improve her mood, you added, "I also wished it had just been a nightmare to have heard Vision call you horny."

With a short, embarrassed laugh, Wanda covered her face with her hands, making you chuckle. "I can never look at you again." She murmured against her skin and you smiled tenderly, propping your elbow on the bed and moving your free hand to her wrists, gently tugging for her to stop covering herself.

"Don't do that. It would be a crime to deprive me of those beautiful green eyes of yours." You praise, smiling at the way her face reddens, the shy smile that fills her lips so suddenly inviting.

Clearing her throat, Wanda asks, "What time is it?" And tries to look beyond the window, but it is late and you can see only the moonlight outside. "I can't believe we slept all afternoon." She comments, and she is avoiding your gaze because you are simply staring at her in the dumbest way possible, and with that realization, you feel your face heat up, and you look away quickly, putting a little distance between you two as you sit down on the bed.

"I don't think we missed dinner. If you're hungry you'd better get up." You commented quickly. Wanda found your hurry strange and frowned as she saw you getting up.

"I'm not really hungry." She warns then, and you stop midway, turning to her with some hesitation. "You can go if you want."

"Okay..." You agree, shifting the weight of your feet. "Is it all right if I come back?"

Wanda smiled, looking at you in a way that made your stomach turn in nervousness. She nodded and you smiled too, gesturing awkwardly that you were going to the kitchen before leaving the room.

In the hallway, you let out a loud sigh. Something was different. You didn't know exactly what, but you had the feeling that you wouldn't be in control of yourself if you lay in bed with Wanda again.

Lost in thought, you went to the kitchen. You found the Avengers at the end of dinner, wrapped up in small talk and comments about upcoming missions. When Pietro saw you entering, he sped his body toward you.

"So, can I start calling you sister-in-law now?" He asked and you widened your eyes, laughing awkwardly.

"Excuse me?"

"Natasha told me you're in love with Wanda and" You covered Pietro's mouth with your hand so quickly you could have been mistaken for the team's speedster. The boy frowned in confusion, but you only sighed impatiently.

"First, keep your voice down." You ordered. "Second, don't talk about it. I haven't...told her yet."

"What? But you've been locked in her room with her all day." Pietro grumbles against your hand, and you grimace, motioning away as you complain about the drool. Natasha approaches you next, an empty plate of food she was carrying to the sink.

"Let me guess, she didn't make the move." Ironized the widow making you blush as Pietro laughed. "Girl, you need an intervention."

Rolling your eyes, you cross your arms as you lean on the kitchen countertop, watching Natasha wash the dishes.

"We were talking about other stuff, it wasn't the right time." You justify, but Pietro and Nat exchange glances that signal they don't agree with you one bit.

"And what will the right time be, Y/N? When Wanda gets engaged?" Nat retorts and you grimace, looking away.

Pietro sighs beside you, and softer than your friend, tells you, "You know she likes you too, right?"

Feeling your face heat up, you look at him incredulously, "Hard to believe that when she was dating someone else this morning." You sneer but sigh, not even believing your own words. Uncrossing your arms, you explain, "Wanda is going through a lot. Losing her home, the increase of her powers. She's been having a hard time accepting herself, and she needs to be able to love who she is before I do. O-or anyone."

Pietro nods in understanding, obviously aware of the situation with his sister. Unlike Wanda, who seemed to grow more insecure with every second regarding her powers, with every speed record broken, Pietro thought of himself as more incredible.

Nat finished washing her plate and wiped her hands on a cloth before turning to you. "So you haven't made a move about loving her because you think she has to love herself first?"

You nodded.

"And you didn't think that telling her how much she is loved by you might help?"

You hesitate at Nat's words. But then you argue:

"I don't want Wanda to be dependent on my love for her. I want her to see how amazing she is on her own, not let anyone tell her otherwise. I want her to know that she is worthy of the best love anyone can offer."

Nat gives a sad smile, shaking her head. "That's really sweet and all, dorogoya." She begins. "But if you don't tell Wanda how you feel, things will just look different to her."

You frown in confusion. "What do you mean?"

Nat sighs. "She cares about you. And you need to ignore the insecurity in your head and see things as they are because everyone can see how much. She likes you, looks at you as if you were the star on her horizon. She accepts every suggestion, seeks your approval and opinion, and longs for your presence. When you tell her she needs to love herself, but don't say you love her, how do you think Wanda feels?"

Stunned, you don't answer. Natasha places a hand on your shoulder. "Y/N, take the advice from that book you adore so much. We should try to show people that they deserve better love. You are the best for Wanda, then show her that you are here."

Pietro gives you an encouraging smile next to Nat, and you swallow dryly before nodding.

–//–

Wanda thought it was odd that you were taking so long to get back, but she wasn't really in the mood to join the others, so she busied herself with tidying up the room while she waited.

She also decided that she could relax more easily if you did something together, so she set up the bed and the TV for a little evening of sitcoms.

But you didn't show up.

Frustrated and hesitant, she checked her watch. It was definitely past dinnertime, and the Avengers should be mostly asleep by now. So where the hell was you?

Maybe you had forgotten. Maybe you had asked her to come back there just as a joke.

Maybe you didn't even like her that much.

"Jesus!" Wanda exclaimed in surprise when the door suddenly opened. You muttered muffled apologies because you were carrying papers in your mouth. You were also carrying a box in hand and a laptop. "What are you doing?"

You mumbled something she didn't understand and closed the door with your foot. You moved to leave the box on the table and took the papers out of your mouth.

"Sorry for taking so long, I was preparing something." You say and simply walked over and kissed her cheek, smiling as stepped away for your stuff.

Wanda was too surprised to comment on how you were plugging the laptop into the television and pushing her back onto the bed until she was seated and you were back in charge of the electronics.

Clearing your throat, you stared at the confused girl in front of you with a certain frenzy.

"So, I've prepared something for you. A presentation." You start and press the power button.

In bright letters is written "Things I Love about Wanda Maximoff" and as soon as she reads it, the witch lets out a surprised laugh.

"Y/N, what is that?" She asks in a mixture of confusion and embarrassment. You are smiling confidently.

"Please, questions only at the end of the presentation." You retort with a falsely serious teacher's tone, making Wanda laugh heartily now. Clearing your throat again, you press the control again, and the presentation slide goes to a picture of two little babies. "The first fact I love about Wanda Maximoff is that she was born exactly 12 minutes after her twin brother, and that doesn't stop her one bit from acting like the oldest." You declare, and Wanda giggles, feeling her chest warm.

The slide switches again, and you don't look away from Wanda as you continue, images of twin children behind you.

"I also love how Wanda Maximoff used to wear braces because her front teeth were too big, and she needed them for three years." You recount, and Wanda can only imagine that some of this stuff came from medical records, and some her own twin must have told you. "I love that Wanda used to draw castles and princesses on the walls of her house."

The slide switched again, replacing the old photographs of her building with things that happened later. Wanda swallowed dryly as she saw the images of the civil protests in her country, but you didn't flinch.

"I love the young revolutionary you become. Angry and fearless. I love the way you started dressing, the torn clothes, the dark makeup." You retort proudly. "Oh, and I adore the rings, too."

Wanda giggles at the picture of the innumerable rings, and is surprised that you turn away from the television to return to the cardboard box you brought. After fiddling with it, you take out a small package.

You approach it, and crouch down in front of it, placing the object in your hands.

"Here are all the rings that I borrowed from you, but which you thought you had lost. There are also new ones, the ones you saw at the night market we went to with Pietro, and also from that day at the mall." You explained, opening the box and making it possible for Wanda to see the dozens of shiny little rings inside. "I also gathered the ones you accidentally marked or destroyed with your magic, but they're not here. I'm keeping them."

"Why?"

"They were yours." You reply with a smile. "Maybe I'll make something of them, or maybe I'll just keep it. Until you feel you can look at them again."

Wanda swallowed dryly, nodding in understanding. She made mention of hugging you, but you giggled and turned away, muttering about the presentation not being over.

The images changed again, now showing a young avenger. The title was "The cutest little witch in the world"

"I absolutely love Wanda in her superhero phase" You comment and she gives an embarrassed laugh to your expression, hiding her face in her hands. "Best era of all. The clothes, the hair. She looks incredible, don't you think?"

Wanda just laughs, shaking her head as you gesture to the images of missions on the screen.

"I almost forgot, I love Wanda's accent too." You say. "She was born in Sokovia, you know. And she's been learning from Natasha about how to sound American, but when she's moody or when she's sleepy, her accent gets thick. And I have to confess, it's the hottest thing I've ever heard."

Wanda's breathing hitched. You looked away from hers for the first time, though you continued to smile shyly.

Switching slides, you cleared your throat and added:

"Now, the personality session." You say. "It's very important for us not to be superficial in things like this, right? Well, there's a lot that I love about Wanda's personality. Some people think she is shy and innocent, but I will tell you, this girl has the most sarcastic and acidic humor I have ever seen." You tell, making her chuckle softly, all because she is still quite impacted by the last slide. "Wanda is so funny, and sometimes people don't get that, because she's busy doing her villain pose and being quiet, but that's the truth. And she's so smart. Like, really. Quick thinking, just like her brother. Everybody who underestimates her ends up impressed because Wanda is just amazing."

At this point, Wanda is surprised that she is not crying. Maybe it's your fault, that you're looking at her in a way that makes her legs go wobbly.

But the slide changes, to images of Wanda using her powers, and she tenses up, hesitating for the first time. You don't lose your composure.

"I love your powers." You confess seriously. "They are a part of you, of your history. A symbol of the sacrifice you made for Sokovia, a sample of your struggle. But they are also wonderful. They make you powerful, give you the abilities to protect the ones you love, which is exactly what you're so eager to do."

The tears finally come. Wanda sniffles softly, forcing a smile, but they fall anyway. You go back to the cardboard box. From it, you take out some kind of heavy workbook, which you bring back to the bed as you sit down next to Wanda.

"I only took ten minutes on the presentation, because it's pretty easy for me to name the hundreds of little things I love about you, Wanda." You counted softly. "What really took time, was asking Vision to use the stone and finding all the information on the internet about your magic."

You drummed your fingers on the cover for Wanda to read the title. It read "Wanda Maximoff's Magic Encyclopedia. Volume One."

"There's probably a lot missing, but we'll work on it." You say with a smile. "Vis even found a forum talking about some magician's home in China that we can investigate, but for now, thought what we could gather on the subject to help you understand yourself better would be exactly-”

Wanda pulled the book from your hands to place it on the bed, and with her free hand, she tugged at your shirt. The next second, her lips were on yours, interrupting your speech and train of thought completely. You gasped in surprise, affected by the softness of her lips.

With your shock, you did not reciprocate, and Wanda pulled away, eyes widening as if she realized what she had done, "I-I'm really sorry."

"I..."

She stood up, gesturing nervously and babbling, "I'm sorry, you started saying these things, and you brought me gifts and I just thought maybe you might... but this is silly, now things are going to get awkward between us because I messed up just like I ruin everything..."

With a groan, you stood up, lunging forward against Wanda. You cut her off half a sentence as you entwined her waist and pulled her to you, one hand on the back of her neck as you kissed her hard.

You both gasped, stumbling a bit from the intensity of the kiss before you broke into a passionate rhythm. Wanda melted, grabbing your shoulders to deepen the kiss while one of your hands squeezed her waist and made her sigh. You took advantage of the action to slide your tongue towards her lower lip, asking for permission, and when Wanda granted almost immediately, you moaned softly at the sensation.

Kissing so hungrily and in such passionate ways, your bodies began to heat up. Hands grew bolder, so long-buried feelings exploding on the surface all at once. Panting against each other's mouths, Wanda instinctively began to thrust her hips into you, and couldn't control the sound that escaped her throat as your hand moved down to her ass and pressed her up against you.

You moved again until you felt the bed at the back of your knees. Wanda wasted no time in pushing you up into a sitting position and taking her place on your lap. The kiss seemed to get more frantic after that, your hands dangerously on her thigh, caressing her skin as fast as your tongue slid over hers.

When Wanda slowly began to wiggle in your lap, seeking relief from the aching in her center, you choked against her lips, steadying your hands on her hips.

"Wands." You gasped as you broke the kiss, almost in a warning tone. She opened her dark eyes to you, her lips completely swollen from kissing so hard, and you almost ignored the remnants of sanity to go back kissing her.

"What's wrong?" She asked hoarsely and breathlessly, frowning slightly.

You swallowed dryly. "Don't do that."

"Do what?" she asked in a fake confusion. Biting back a smile, she stared at you with the worst of intentions in her gaze, "You don't like it?"

"Of course I like it." You retorted hoarsely. "I like it so much I don't want to stop."

Wanda smiled, bringing your faces closer together again. "Then don't."

This time, when she kissed you and moved back on your lap, you helped her. Your hands on her waist guided her movements, and Wanda let out an affected whimper when the pressure was just right. The sound made you groan, hiding your face in her neck as the girl failed to contain her sighs while she straddled your lap.

"I need more." She confessed hoarsely, stopping moving. You felt your face get very hot because you could feel the wetness and heat coming off of her. Looking into her face with an almost pleading expression, you just stared back at her.

"A-are you sure?" You asked, and her response was to move forward against your mouth, kissing you intently as she guided your hands down along your thigh.

Breaking the kiss to move her lips to your neck, you bit back a sigh when she whispered into your skin:

"I want you to take off my clothes." She asked, her hands on top of yours entwined in your fingers. "And I want you to kiss me until you can no longer keep yours on."

"Don't you think it's too soon?" You ask, unable to keep your eyes open with Wanda's lips teasing your skin. But your sentence seems to bring her a little reason because she sighs and lifts her face back to yours.

"You think that?"

Blinking away the cloud of arousal, you lick your lips. "I've been in love with you for the last three years, Wanda. I'm ready, but I can always wait a little longer."

"Are you in love with me?" She asks unable to contain a smile.

You feel your face heat up, but you let out a short chuckle;

"Sorry, did the presentation called literally the reasons why I love Wanda Maximoff give you the wrong idea?"

She laughed, shaking her head. "It could be platonic..."

"Girl, I'm practically taking your virginity in my lap right now." You retorted, and she blushed brightly, laughing and pushing your shoulder with her hand.

All you did was look at her lovingly, and Wanda swallowed dryly, feeling several butterflies in her stomach.

"I love you, Wanda." You repeated. "In a not at all platonic way, I promise." You joked last, and she giggled, releasing your hands to intertwine her arms behind your head.

"I love you, too. Romantically speaking." She retorted in the same tone, and when she kissed you - more tenderly this time - you were both smiling.

Before the kiss could start to heat up again, you broke off, giving an apologetic chuckle at the girl's sigh of frustration.

"Sorry, it's just that I'm pretty sure half the team is in the hallway waiting to hear if everything worked out."

Wanda let out a confused giggle and then realized that she could sense the presence of the other avengers in the hallway with her magic and let out a loud sigh.

"Maybe they'll give up if we stay quiet." She whispers, but the knock on the door the next minute makes you laugh at her angry expression.

You made a mention of getting up to answer it, but Wanda forced her body against yours.

"Don't go." She pleaded and you smiled. Instead of obeying, you carried her with you.

It was Steve at the door - evidently embarrassed and most likely blackmailed to do so. But he cracked a smile at the sight of Wanda entwined with you.

"So...?"

"Yes, Captain." You confirmed and barely finished your sentence when Natasha and Pietro jumped in front, shoving Steve with celebrations. You rolled your eyes at the scene, seeing that Tony had set up a hologram with the message "I Knew it all along" and Thor had brought bottles of champagne. "You guys are the worst." You commented with a laugh.

"Yeah, yeah, pretend you're not happy about it all." Natasha retorted. "Hey Koala girl, did you forget that it's our mandatory movie night tonight? Come on, you two to the living room this second. You can make out later."

Nat didn't let you get away from this. But you didn't really care, because this time, Wanda sat on your lap during the entire movie.

[pocket-void]

That’s a lotta Logans. o///o

Heya! So to celebrate Logan’s B-Day I thought it would be fun to draw a whole bunch of Logan interpretations/AUs from the community!!  I added two differently highlighted pics to hopefully make it easier to see everybody. >///<

As fun as it was, I did eventually have to make the executive decision to stop at a grand total of 20! (19 versions + OG Logan!) ^///^ But I’m gonna spend the rest of his birthday drawing a couple others as well, but that’ll have to wait till morning! o///o

I’m going to be tagging everyone in the image below alongside a numbered image if you wanna know who’s who!! I hope this was ok with everybody, and I just wanna say thank you! Y’all are all v v cool!! ;///; 

Happy birthday to our favorite nerd~ u///u

DATLEH AU - @fangirltothefullest - I picked the grown up version since Logan’s technically still a baby, but it’s a cool design and I really wanted to draw it!!

Magical Girl AU - @chronophobica - Hey it’s me again, drawing another magical girl design because they’re really neat?? Wish I could draw the outfit properly some other time. >///<

Church Stop AU - That’s mine, I’m planning on continuing the plot some time soon! But I kind of snuck him in there so the total was an even 20, pffft.

Logan Design - @caffeinated-cryptid - Your Logan design and your art in general is??? So Pretty??? ;///; Like fr the first time I saw it I was absolutely floored- The planets on the strings??? I love it sm, bless. ;///;

Logan Design - @thoriffix - Logan with braces and greying hair is so! Valid! What an absolute dad of a design, it’s great! o///o

Grand Guardians AU - @ss-grand-guardians - I still really like the designs in this AU and I haven’t forgotten. They’re really really cool!  ;///;

Art Collab AU - @skyscrapersanddandelions - Your AU was sent to me and it’s really cute!! I really liked it! I hope I drew him ok. o///o

Personality Switch AU - @sanderssidespersonalityswitchau - Someone actually asked me something about this one which I will get to. O///o But yeah! I actually really liked the feral science man with sharp teeth. u///u

Logan Design - @dizzeeart - Ok so like I do not do this one justice because the outfit he’s in is fabulous afbakfdmn. I hope I did alright!! (Might do it properly another time, we’ll see we’ll see o///o)

Logan Design - @hot-scientist - I really hope I did your design alright!! >///< Your designs, ocs, and art are v v cool and I just wanted to say that!!

Human AU - @romanapologist - Your comic is so neat!! ;///; Fr fr I love em all, but Logan’s an absolute darling! >///<

Anima Guides AU - @animalguides-au - Honestly I just had to draw Crowgan again lmaooo I love the bird that collects shiny spoons with all my heart, bless. Also your art is v cute!! u///u

Little Mindscape AU - @shortnfantastic - Ok whoever hasn’t seen Little Mindscape is honestly missing out so much because it’s genuinely such a cute, adorable, and fluffy comic and it makes me and I’m sure lots and lots of other people so happy. Thank you! ;///;

Tiny Cat Logan - @pattonwillliterallyfightyou​ - I know this is kind of a joke but can I just??? Say that your art??? Is so cute??? Like mate, the game you’re making already makes me endlessly happy and then???? Anyways my point is you’re cool. ;///;

Chibi Sides - @chibisidesm8​ - Aiden!! I just wanted to say that appreciate you sm. ;///; The speed at which you draw is genuinely astounding like, you make so much content- But I love seeing it!! They’re absolutely adorable!!

Puppet History AU - @ying-doodles​ - Admittedly I know nothing about puppet history but I can’t say no to the kind of chaotic puppet so- O///o I hope you like it!! ^///^

Logan Design - @mango-shpango​ - I just really adore your design for him. >///< The hair!! The freckles!! Also the outfits!! I dunno it’s just super neat and I appreciate it! o///o

Logan Design - @sashootkahoot​ - SASH ILY!! Also I adore our Logan because liking long hair solidarity LMAO- Also but really thank you and ily for giving me a few suggestions and I was v v happy drawing him! ^///^

Narda AU - @mr-scandalous​ - I know this AU is self indulgent or what not but I really liked it!! Honestly you do you Mi!! I hope I drew him ok and I wish you well!! ^///^

AND THAT’S ALL FOLKS!!

[cherrykindness]

one spoon for two |

first of all, i can't make my first post in english without thanking those who helped and encouraged me to make this decision. thank you for everything @waitimcomingtoo, @harryhoney-bee and @parkers-gal 🧡

summary: you and peter share spoons and sweatshirts and are “secretly” in love with each other.

pairing: peter parker x stark!reader

warning: hi! english (obviously) is not my first language, so I ask for patience, im still learning <3

"Good morning." You said with a enviable morning good humor as soon as you arrived at the complex's kitchen, receiving distracted nods and murmurs from Bucky, Sam, and Natasha. Peter, on the other hand, received your greeting with equal enthusiasm.

"Good morning, Y/N." He replied anxiously, straightening the posture and removing his feet from the chair beside. "Do you want to sit here?" He asked quick and shyly, pretending not to notice Bucky and Sam narrowing their eyes across the table. "I-I mean, it's empty, but you don't have to if you don't want to."

You nodded, accepting the offer before sitting down next to the boy you used to call best friend, frowning as you noticed that your yogurt with granola was already prepared next to a spoon and a glass of milk.

"Did you do that?"

Peter agreed, feeling a warmth rise from his neck to his cheeks.

"Yes, I figured you would be tired after last night."

That answer was enough to capture the attention of the entire kitchen. Steve, who was walking through the door with an empty mug in hand, stopped as soon as he heard the phrase leave Peter's lips, widening his eyes as he struggled not to let the ceramic object hit the floor.

"What?" Bucky asked in astonishment, blinking rapidly as he looked away between you and Peter. "What did you guys do last night?"

You and Peter looked at each other in confusion, but before you could respond, Natasha pointed to your clothes.

"Is that Peter's sweatshirt?"

Steve's pressure seemed to have dropped at this very moment. With trembling hands and flushed cheeks, the soldier sat down on one of the chairs, hiding his face amidst inaudible murmurs.

"Tony already knows this?" Sam asked with his mouth full of cereal, looking at you both with disapproval.

"What should I know?"

Peter swallowed hard when he heard your father's voice, dreading the mischievous smile that grew on Bucky's face.

"That me and Pete spent the whole night watching Star Wars." You were quick to respond, causing Peter to let out a relieved sigh.

"So that's what the kids call it these days?" Steve whispered, looking more shocked by the minute. Natasha patted her friend on the back, offering consolation.

"The Spider-Baby said he made Y/N very tired last night." Bucky, playing the part of the devil on Peter's shoulder, repeated the sentence with slight alteration.

"I didn't say that." The boy with bright curls said in horror, shaking his head frantically as his face turned as red as fresh strawberries. "It wasn't like that, Mr. Stark."

"So explain it to me." Tony demanded with a serious face, crossing his arms over his chest.

The boy became an clumsy mess in a matter of seconds. Bucky, Sam and Natasha holding their own giggling as the comic moment unfolded.

"You don't have to say anything, Pete." You reassured him, understanding your father's intentions. "Let's get away from those perverts. We still have a lot to enjoy this weekend."

You stood up with Peter at your heels, leaving the kitchen under the watchful eyes of the Avengers. Everyone, except Steve, burst out laughing as soon as Tony made sure that you were no longer around, Sam having to wipe away a few tears that had escaped from the corner of his eyes.

"What?" Steve asked confused, staring at the others strangely. "What did I miss?"

"They are so oblivious." Natasha said with a smile, shaking her head negatively.

"It's kind of cute." Tony admitted, shaking his shoulders. "The boy is unable to make a move, however."

"What?" Steve voiced it for the third time in less than three minutes. "They-they- you know; Aren't you angry? Isn't that a move for you?"

"They did nothing, cap." Tony stated between a sigh. "They spent the night watching Star Wars just as Y/N said, believe me."

"But is painfully obvious the Spider-Boy is upside down for her." Sam stated, earning a nod from Tony, Bucky and Natasha. "He was already here when me and Bucky showed up in the morning. He was sitting at the table and Y/N's breakfast was also already prepared. I was about to sit next to him– and it was the first time I ever considered sitting next to that child, I swear, when he simply put his feet up on the empty chair, saying that he had severe cramps and needed space. When Y/N appeared at the door all smiling and wearing his college sweatshirt, puft, it seems that the boy went out of his mind, and the first thing he did was to offer the seat next to him."

"There was one day that Y/N needed to help Bruce in the lab and was without access to her cell phone for most of the day. Peter and I were working together on his suit, but the boy was picking up the cell phone every two minutes. He sent a message at 04:30 and Y/N didn't answer until at 08:47, so guess what? Peter answered at 08:48." Said Tony.

"The boy was whipped." Bucky uttered between a sip of coffee.

"He and Y/N were sharing a pot of strawberry ice cream during the last movie session." It was Natasha's turn to share a moment between you and Peter, attracting the attention of the men accompanying her, "but there was only one spoon for both."

There was a suggestive exchange of glances between her, Stark, Barnes and Wilson, broken by Rogers' timid and cautious voice.

"So the kids didn't do anything indecent?"

"Oh, for God's sake!" Tony rolled his eyes, leaving the room.

–

It was almost seven in the evening when Peter came into the kitchen again, now with a green mask on his face and a Hello Kitty's patch over his nose.

"What the fuck?" Bucky asked skeptically, almost spitting out the sandwich that was in his mouth.

"Y/N and I are going skin care tonight." Peter replied simply, going over to the refrigerator as everyone watched him intently.

"And what is that on your face?" Natasha asked the question everyone wanted while Peter grabbed a pot of ice cream from the freezer.

"Avocado mask. She saw in TikTok that it is good for the pores."

"So that was the fate of the avocado I bought to eat in the morning." Steve said regretfully. "It's okay, I can buy another one tomorrow."

"I have many questions, but I don't think any answer will answer them." Sam do a grimace before turning to the food laid out on the table.

"Peter, you should ask Y/N out on a date." Thor gave his opinion. "That's what you Midgardians call, right?"

Peter choked with the air as he heard the Thunder God's phrase, almost letting the pot of ice cream slide down the sink.

"W-we go to dates almost every day." He refuted with red face. "Tomorrow we will go to the supermarket. We can buy another avocado for you, Steve."

"But this is not the kind of date we are talking abo–" Natasha tried to explain, but Peter was already leaving the kitchen practically running.

"Bye, Y/N is waiting me to put cucumbers over the eyes."

"You got only one spoon!" The redhead screamed.

"It's enough!"

The Avengers present exchanged a look of recognition before Thor broke the silence, repeating the question Sam had asked that same morning:

"Tony already knows this?"

Everyone shook their shoulders simultaneously, Bruce being the only one to speak up verbally when silence filled the room.

"I'm sure he's already pulling some strings."

–

"Please, Tony, don't tell me that you are hiding to spying Peter and Y/N."

Tony peeked a bit between the leaves as he heard Pepper's harsh voice, putting the binoculars in the back pocket of his pants as covertly as possible.

"Spying?" He laughed exaggeratedly loudly. "Of course not, dear. This is absurd."

The woman eyed him suspiciously, reaching into her husband's pocket as soon as he hugged her.

"So can you start explaining to me the binoculars, the camouflage clothing, and the presence of a giant plant that was not in the hallway before?"

Tony walked away defeated, lowering his eyes at the judgmental look he was receiving.

"The word "spying" is too strong, okay? Let's say I was watching them without them knowing."

Pepper rolled her eyes.

"They are already adults, Tony. You should let them make their own decisions, and it is pretty obvious that they like each other. I know that the idea of Peter and Y/N dating may be strange to you, but–"

"Strange?" He almost shouted, lowering his voice when he noticed that the music that used to come from your room had stopped, now putting his camouflage skills at risk. "Baby, I love you, but you are crazy." He whispered. "Peter is the only boy who deserves to be with someone like Y/N, and all I have been doing for the past seven months is trying to get them to confess the feelings that everyone knows exist, but they seem too blind to see. So far I remain with the verdict that the boy is right for her and I hope don't change my mind anytime soon. They are my OTP."

"OTP?" Pepper asked confused by the slang.

"One True Pairing. Honey, you are so out of date."

"All right, I'm leaving."

Tony arched an eyebrow as he watched his wife walk away and take the binoculars, shrugging his shoulders before hiding behind the leaves again. He spent almost two hours there, but nothing interesting had happened, just you and Peter going back and forth from the kitchen with greasy foods and ice cream, a spoon for two as you shared whatever it was in the aisles, sometimes even taking it into each other's mouths, making Tony look away from those nauseatingly sweet scenes.

He had a story appointment with Morgan and his presence in the little girl's room at nine was a must. The plan affectionately called "Project Starker" had failed that day, and Tony had to accept defeat as he went to your room, expecting to find you and Peter sprawled out on the bed while some nerdy movie was playing on TV.

"Y/N? Peter?"

The room was dark, lit only by adjacent lights coming through the window. Tony stumbled over a few objects along the way, walking blindly through the furniture until he was near your bed.

"Can you even see each other here? God, how–"

Tony had to interrupt the sentence, surprised to see you and Peter snuggled up to each other, sleeping peacefully while a current series he didn't know the name of played on the TV at an almost inaudible volume. He shook his head in denial, holding back a smile before nudging Peter's waist, forging an angry timbre:

"Kid, you have a room here for a reason. What are you doing in my daughter's bed?"

Peter blinked a few times, completely lost and surprised by Tony's presence.

"Mr. Stark?" He asked stunned, trying to see Tony through the shadows. "Why are you here?"

Your father raised one of his eyebrows, aghast at the sudden boldness of the teenager before remembering the younger man's sleepwalking habits. Peter probably thought he was dreaming or some shit.

"Why are you here?" Tony returned the question, crossing his arms.

"Because I'm in love with Y/N and I want to sleep next to her."

Tony opened his mouth like a goldfish, cursing himself mentally for not recording that statement, shaking Peter's body when he started to close his eyes again.

"Aren't you going to your room?"

Peter mumbled something indecipherable, tightening his arms around your body as you continued to sleep heavily on his chest.

"No, thanks for the offer."

Tony nodded to nothing, deciding to just close your curtain and ask to Friday to turn off the TV.

"Thank you for doing Y/N too, Mr. Stark. I appreciate that."

Tony laughed softly, promising himself that he would tease the boy about it the next morning, “Go to sleep, kid. I'm sure no one will leave you alone tomorrow after I tell what you said."

Stark was about to leave when he noticed Peter's feet sticking out of the covers. The night was cold, and there was nothing but a thin comforter protecting the two of you.

"Just one blanket?" He asked.

"Yes." Peter kind of whispered, pulling you closer. "It's enough."

This time Tony didn't hold back his smile, shaking his head before closing the door, leaving you and Peter in that little bubble of teenage passion.

"Point for you, Spider-Boy."

[the-army-brat-and-the-nerd]

Clois!! (I'm not picky about the show)

Hey! Thanks for asking....I'm tagging @sci-fi-pony as she asked for DCEU clois (Please know, though: mine is a kinda universal perspective when it comes to them, so)

So even if (some of ) the following tend to be canon (only) in the comics, I see them working really well with the DCEU as well as all other incarnations!

Here we go:

Who was the one to propose?

CLARK!! (No doubts- whatever incarnation 😄, and he was extremely nervous about popping the question, and not screwing the whole thing up!)

Who stressed more over wedding planning?

Lois, possibly - coz Clark would've been in and out- saving the day (doesn't mean he wasn't stressed though!)

Who decorated the house?

While moving in? Both. Taking the time to find the perfect spot for everything Otherwise- I'm betting Clark. (I picture him to be picky about indoor decor (also- he's the one who puts in an effort to keep everything neat and tidy and properly in place,)

Who does the cooking?

Again, CLARK! 😂. And he's an exceptional chef- Lois is absolutely appreciative of that, and Clark simply spoils her with heavenly meals and desserts.

Who is more organized?

Clark (Wow- Kent you've outdone yourself!)...we all have seen the state of Lois' desk at the planet(and outside)!

I agree this one looks comparatively neater, though:

Who suggested kids first?

IMO- Lois. (As surprising as it may appear to be! And I'm pretty sure it wasn't an intentional conversation- it came up and they had a long enlightening talk).

Who’s the cuddler?

I think they're both pros in that field (which is saying something, as Lois is pretty foreign to that sort of thing)

Who’s the big spoon/little spoon?

Clark's the big spoon, definitely. It works the other way too, sometimes! (That is-when she isn't purposefully sprawling herself over him)

What’s their favorite non-sexual activity?

Date nights- up in the sky a.k.a flying together. (What am I saying? Rephrase- ONLY DATE NIGHTS; no funny business)

Who cooks?

No- I'm not changing my opinion, it's still Kent!

Who comes home drunk at 3am?

LOIS! And Clark's all momma bear mode later...(it physically pains him to see her in that state lol, so instead of reprimanding- he's actually very caring and considerate about the whole issue) Although this is a different scenario....it's pretty much self explanatory

Who kills the spiders?

Lois. ( "LO! WHAT ARE YOU DOING? THEY HAVE A PULSE, HON- LEAVE THOSE POOR CREATURES ALONE!")

Who falls asleep first?

Lois. But she makes sure that he falls asleep first after one of those infamous "nightmare" episodes.

A head canon?

My head canons literally suck but.. they love slow dancing (Lois is terrible at it and was initially mortified by that idea but, still...)- may it be on Valentine's day, their anniversary or any other festive/non festive occasion- it just comes naturally.

Their relationship summed up in a gif?

Very impossible for me to do that, sorry! However- I'm open to your ideas!

Do they have any “rituals”?

This isn't totally a head cannon but : Every New Year's Eve, Clark would zoom them both to watch mesmerizing firework displays from the top of the world. (As cheesy as that sounds)

Who has the most patience?

Clark. Yeah- who's surprised?

So there's that!! And I did dig the internet for a G.I.F, lol I couldn't come up with one that could perfectly sum up their relationship!

You guys wanna add something, feel free!

Thankyou so much for asking!

[tundrainafrica]

Title: Do you love daddy?

Summary:  

“Do you love daddy?” Luke repeated. His eyes were wide, he was probably reading into her soul.

Hange didn’t want to give him too easy of a time mind reading. “Of course I do,” she said.

“How come you never tell him you love him?”

Luke asks Hange a question and Hange reflects on it.

Written for Levihan Week 2021, Day 2: Confessions

Link: AO3

Notes:

Levihan Week Day 2 Prompt: Confessions, organized by @levihanweek.

I edited this half asleep to meet my own internal deadline for day 2. I hope it still suffices. Feedback is very much appreciated!

Anyway, I hope you enjoy!

There was a small forest near their house. In fact, Hange had decided on their permanent home mainly for its proximity from the park.

In the middle of the park was a small, small forest. But to Hange, it was ginormous. Or at least, what you would consider ginormous in an urban setting. It held adventure. It held mystery. It held some breathtaking liberation, something withheld from her during her years as a commander.

That particular weekend was a lazy weekend. It was just her and her son. For some parent-child bonding, Hange was ready to get lost in the forest. Before she could even dive deeper though, reality rammed into her in such an abrupt, yet such gentle and adorable manner. “Do you love daddy?” Luke asked.

With those words alone, Hange could almost hear the curiosity burning inside him. She kept her eyes trained ahead, focusing on the forest. The woods were small, the forest was only large enough for a few small kids to play some hybrid between tag and hide-and-seek. The trees were of a safe size, some convenient shape that framed their surroundings.

It was a beautiful view, something she didn’t see often, especially when cooped up in the office forty hours a week. She decided to enjoy it and let whatever answer to that question come organically.

Do I love Levi?

The forest held more than adventure. It held something silent and invisible. Along the way, she had suddenly become aware of the breathing of her son, the rustle of the leaves. He was only inches away from her. In surprise, she turned back to her son while attempting to conceal the discomfort. She willed herself to keep her chin up, her eyes a reasonable size and her breathing very much even.

“Do you love daddy?” The kid repeated, his eyes wide. He could probably read into her soul and she didn’t want to give him too easy of a time mind reading.

“Of course I do,” Hange said.

“How come you never tell him you love him?”

“I do.”

“Corbin says his parents tell each other they love each other everyday,” Luke said.

Corbin… Was that a friend at school? It was nothing more than a passing thought. If it demanded to be something else, Hange didn’t notice, her thoughts had embedded themselves into something a little more pressing. “Luke, you don’t think I love daddy?” she challenged.

The young boy cocked his head to one side and shrugged. “You don’t tell daddy you love him…”

Hange could have sworn she did. She found herself racking her memories for some hint to an answer, some hint to reassurance that would suffice for her son.

When Hange indulged that nostalgia, the trees blurred for a second, the greens extended beyond the frames of her view. The sky that wiggled themselves through the canopy as streams of light disappeared for just a second.

Why don’t we just live here together? They echoed inside her and with it, they sent a rush of confidence through her. “I love him.” She had enough confidence to introduce it as if it were a well thought out proposition. She turned to his son.

Luke narrowed his eyes. Through the years, he was starting to look more and more like his father. If Luke expressed emotions anything like his father, Hange could be certain, it was doubt written all over his face.

Luke didn’t believe her? Hange was in no mood though for a lecture. She was in no mood for a moment of introspection, especially when there were still lichens and moss around her she wanted to identify. “Let’s talk about that when we get home.”

The conversation was over. Hange walked ahead then into the forest and tabled that problem for later.

***

Children never forget.

Hange scolded herself for underestimating the boy and to add insult to injury, overestimating herself. She wasn’t at all ready for the talk, especially not in front of Levi. She had just indulged that bad habit of hers, that tendency to assume that a five year old would forget what the hell they had just said.

“Do you love each other?” Luke had asked. It came too out of nowhere, over half finished plates of homemade pasta and untouched bowls of soup.

Levi coughed violently then dropped his spoon. One hand flew to his mouth. “What the fuck.” It came out like a mumble, a second later, concealed by one smooth deep breath.

Hange was frozen, too frozen to even tell what had been her first reaction.

Levi composed himself quickly. “Why are you asking that?”

Hange had known him long enough to know though that he was raring to insert some curse into that query. “Of course we do” Her response was automatic. Still she found herself, flashing Levi a look.

He returned it with something unreadable, seemingly uninterested but with a sliver of surprise.

“How come you never tell each other ‘I love you?’” Luke asked.

“We do,” Levi said.

For a second, Hange was relieved. At least they were still in the same wavelength.

“When?” Luke asked.

“Sometimes… when you’re asleep,” Hange said. Once again, those words had been automatic, impulsive. They were a product of Hange's inability to process such complex emotions, especially with a five year old of all things.

It was a mistake, an utterly stupid mistake. How the hell Hange hadn’t seen through it, it was a mystery. Really though, five year olds were very unpredictable creatures.

Luke wasn’t sleeping that night and he was doing a shitty job pretending he was asleep. Their apartment wasn’t too small but the walls were thin enough that everything just went bump, sometimes the doors went creak.

Overcompensating maybe for her stupid move, Hange decided to just perk her ears up. listen closely and attempt to make sense of the sounds. A few reiterations later, Hange figured it out. Luke was walking back and forth from the bed to the door and he wasn’t doing such a good job. He bumped, he creaked, sometimes he whispered.

Eventually, Hange would have to come in and put him to bed herself.

Still, that could wait. “Levi. You wanna go back to bed?” Hange said, just loud enough for the sound to travel to the open kitchen. Levi was once again reorganizing the cupboard.

Levi looked back at her, his eyes sleepy and his expression just a little dumb. It was late at night and she couldn’t really blame him for his utter obliviousness and his apathy over the whole fiasco. He shifted his eyes towards the partially open bedroom door for a second, then he met Hange’s gaze. He made his way the few feet to the sofa. “Do you plan on doing anything about… that?” He settled himself on the sofa next to Hange and looked at her expectantly.

“He’s gonna fall asleep eventually.”

“I know the kid. If you don’t talk to him about this, he’s not gonna sleep,” Levi said.

“Talk to him about…” Hange was feigning obliviousness.

It didn’t seem to work with Levi though. “That love thing, whatever that is. I don’t know what even happened between the two of you.” Levi leaned back on the sofa. “But I want my son to get a good night’s sleep.

Hange sighed. “While we were playing in the park, he asked if I loved ‘daddy.’”

Levi turned to her, a deadpan expression on his face. “Do you love me then?”

Comically Deadpan. Hange couldn’t even make sense of it herself, the question, the reaction had come so abruptly, so unexpectedly that Hange had to look away for some space and peace, enough at least for her to come up with some sorry excuse of a response.

“Why? What’s so funny?” Levi pressed.

The more he asked, the harder it would be to answer. And Hange didn’t want to make a big deal of it too late at night. The wry grin on her face was all she could muster. “Sorry, it just came out of nowhere--- What the hell, why are you asking it like this, all of a sudden.”

“Because Luke was asking?” Levi answered matter-of-factly. Hange was starting to wonder, was she making a big deal out of those three simple words?

“There must have been a reason right? A reason we never really said those words...”

“Why don’t you?” Levi asked.

“It feels….” I love you. She echoed it then she moved her lips slightly, just enough to feel for herself how it should have felt to say it out loud. “Excessive?”

“Does it?”

“Well… People say it all the time but then they cheat on each other, they abandon each other, they fight and it just seems like… something people say to be dramatic.”

“Unless you mean it right?” Levi suggested.

“What if--- I just wanna prove it. I wanna earn and support the family. I wanna spend time with you and Luke and I wanna just commit to making the relationship work. I don’t wanna add any unnecessary verbosities to it.”

“Would it hurt to say it?” Levi asked.

“It feels tacky,” Hange admitted.

“Even for your son?”

Hange sensed the slyness, the amusement in Levi’s voice. The war freak in her wanted some retribution. Her mouth went faster. “Do you love me?”

Levi turned a beet red, a rare scene particularly since they had started living together. And before Hange could even confirm that it hadn’t been some trick of the light, he looked away.

Hange craned her neck, ready to take one peek.

Levi couldn’t look away forever. “Do I really have to answer that?”

“Why? What are you so scared of?” Hange didn’t bother to stifle the smile. She snuck it into her words instead as a soft chuckle. “You okay?”

Levi spun around, his head bent down. “You’re right. It sounds tacky.” He put his hand out, balled it into a fist and pressed it to her chest. “Other words just sound better.”

The hand was warm, familiar and with one gesture, Hange felt secure. “Dedicate your heart? So you said that because you love me?”

“I thought I was going to lose you.”

“I thought I was going to lose you too,” Hange admitted. “That’s why I invited you to live in the forest with me.”

“Back then, did you…” Levi raised his brows expectantly.

Love me? Hange took the risk. “Of course.”

“Then why did you stop yourself from saying it?” Levi averted his gaze. He hung his head back and stared up at the ceiling.

“It’s excessive, melodramatic,” Hange admitted. “Why put ourselves to that drama in the middle of the war?”

“But you still invited me to live with you in the forest.”

“Other words just sound better,” Hange said. She mirrored Levi’s tone of a while ago. She hovered her hand over his, and propped it.

Levi looked up once again. Their eyes met and once again, they connected. Like every other time before and Hange was looking back at those other words again.

“Other words just sounded better then.” Right, circumstances were different then. There were words that had just been off limits, too melodramatic, especially in the middle of the war.

The war was over. They were in their own house. They were basking in the peace of post war Paradis.

It could have been a force of habit that the words kept themselves in, even when Hange had opened her mouth to speak. “I love you,” she whispered. The words were heavy, they were looming and somehow when she let them free, some other tension she dind’t even know existed had broken free from inside her. She let out a laugh, too loud for too late at night. “I love you,” she said again, much louder that time.

“Me too,” Levi said. “I love you too.” His response was smooth, natural and not at all hesitant and Hange wondered how long he had kept it in or if he had ever even rehearsed it.

She grinned, gripped his hand harder and let out a long exhale. They were silent for a few seconds and in the silence, the thumps, the thuds were deafeningly loud. Hange studied Levi’s expression, the subtle smile that climbed up his lips.

There was another thud, a few more bumps and suddenly it was silent. On the way to their bedroom, Hange snuck a glance at the partially open door, looking at the lump under the bed, the movements even, the breathing peaceful.

Luke had fallen asleep. For Levi or Luke, or even for herself, Hange made one last gesture. “I love you.” She bent forward, planting a kiss on Levi’s forehead. “Sorry if it’s five years late.”