#i had an incredibly disturbing dream last week……. disturbing stuff tw !!!!
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i need to vent about SH (tw !!!!!) for a sec in the tags bc i am feeling very overwhelmed sorry
#i have my last session with my therapist on wednesday before my surgery so i wont see her in at least two weeks after that and i have been#meaning to bring up sh because it has been on my mind constantly and it makes me want to smash my head against the wall repeatedly :~)#and its not just the urges#i had an incredibly disturbing dream last week……. disturbing stuff tw !!!!#in the dream i just remember looking down at my legs and i had huge enormous c*ts and wounds all over my legs…… like HUGE#and i knew i had made them myself and i remember them so vividly they were horrific and i just looked at them and started crying in such a#desperate raw way that my ears were buzzing and i felt like my head was gonna explode#so yeah i might be having a problem :))))#also i am paranoid because i know when i will go in for the surgery i will be knocked out and my whole body will be in their hands and#they will put some stuff on my fingers and they will 100% see my sc*rs and i want to scream#but other than these little things im fine 😀
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