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#i haven't written joker fics in AGES
strxwberrylemonxde · 2 months
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joker joker 😣🙏 please pleaseee
a/n: SKDNJS I'M FINALLY FREE TO ANSWER MY ASKS 😭 allow me to use this ask to insert some random headcanons of our favorite pookie bear while I work on the other joker fics I got for you 🤩 these are so bad im so sorry
There is something about the Joker that gives "DARRRRRLLINNGGGGG GUESS WHO JUST ESCAPED THE PSYCCHHHH WARDDD"
He would say this to Batman after escaping Arkham for the millionth time
Kicks feet and giggles 
Someone please sedate me
I know damn well they had to put a muzzle on this man in Arkham because he bit someone for talking bad about Batman 
It was Killer Croc 💀
I think this man loves sprinkles for some reason -- specifically rainbow sprinkles 
Like he needs it on his ice cream or else he won't eat it
Like he would rob a store at gunpoint for rainbow sprinkles
 And then go, “Oh nooo, I hope a big, bad, Bat doesn’t come and stop me” type shit 😭
Speaking of ice cream, I wholeheartedly believe Joker is lactose intolerant
Does he care?
Not in the slightest
He is guzzling milk, cheese, and ice cream at all times
He went to extensive lengths to smuggle in a picture of Batman into his cell in Arkham, but don’t ask him how he did it 
You don't wanna know
He has a tattoo on his lower back a tramp stamp of the bat symbol
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jokeringcutio · 1 year
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Update: The Man Who Claimed To Be Yours
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Now that I have finally continued, I have rewritten the outline, adjusted the estimated length of the tale from 12 chapters in total, to 20 chapters. [ For those of you who don't know what I am talking about, you can check the story here ] As those of you who have read and been following the tale online know, I have uploaded 9 chapters in the past. That was with the original outline. The tale ended with Arthur having turned into the Joker and successfully kidnapping you, dear reader, already pregnant with his child. Can't have you all left stranded there, can I? What happens next: Things become more gritty and violent. I have rewritten chapters 10 and 11, and have kept some parts of 12 aside to be used in the tale later on. I had a bit of difficulty finding the right vibe now that the location has changed (no longer in your comfortable home or at the job) and Arthur has become the Joker. I didn't want to lose the feeling of the past chapters, which were mundane and full of smut. In my first drafts, the chapters lost that feel. Not enough smut. Too much I wanted to say in one go. Didn't work. I eventually found back the vibe and the right plot bunny to keep the tale interesting. Between chapter 9 and 10, I have added an interlude (so basically, an extra chapter), describing how the reader is taken by Joker and his new followers to a secret hide-out. I am currently writing chapter 14. This means we have 10, 11, 12 and 13 all written out as a draft. These chapters contain scenes which include cunnilingus, smut, a new friend for our Reader, a rescue plan, plotting against the Joker, violence and maiming (not against our Reader), jealous Joker, visibly pregnant Reader (and Arthur/Joker being all touchy because he wants to feel the baby kick) and well, there's loads more to come! Keep following me for more progress on the tale, snippets, and tidbits about what is going to come next. I plan to write the entire story till the end before I will publish it.
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In the meanwhile, if you like my writing, feel free to browse my masterlist. New tales, drabbles and headcanons appear regularly. Feel free to send in suggestions and prompts as well, though I might be slow in responding to them. Make sure to check out my account for recent updates, as I usually post in a European time frame and I notice that many of my posts are overlooked because of it (which is why I sometimes decide to post prompt fills on different sites as well such as on AO3 ). If you liked The Man Who Claimed To Be Yours and are into Dark Romance/being kidnapped by an older man (with gorgeous dark hair and mental issues rofl) I can recommend my Black Phone Fanfic The Chance to make a Change. This story is complete in draft (so you won't have to wait 2 years or more to know the ending), and is currently being uploaded. It has the same kind of vibe as TMWCTBY. If you want to stick to our Arthur Fleck/Joker then I have tons of little fills written about him, as well as plans for new longer fics. I still want to continue The Princess and The Clown, perhaps rework it. But if you want something short that is complete, can I recommend No Family Man? If you like long-haired men, villains and age gap fics, then I would like to point you at the many Arthur Harrow fills I have written (don't worry, you don't have to have seen the Moon Knight series or read the comics. I haven't either). I am currently working on an asylum patient Harrow x Reader fic as well. Now, to end this post, I have posted a gif that is fitting for The Man Who Claimed To Be Yours. It's not the gif that inspired the entire tale, but it is pretty meaningful to it. I think many readers will know why. Hope you are all having a wonderful day, Yours sincerely, JokeringCutio
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echoes-lighthouse · 1 month
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The Fanfics For Each Of My Selfships (and whether I've written them yet)
Jester No, I haven't written it! But it would be a series of oneshots starting with my s/i leaving home, then travelling through the country, then meeting the Mighty Nein, and I'd skip through canon events from there <3
Tate Yes, I've written the first 15k words but haven't actually gotten to Tate yet :P It's a complete rewrite, starting with my s/i moving into the house and slowly meeting the neighbors, the residents, and figuring out the secrets
Himiko Yes, I wrote the first couple of chapters as a reader-insert fic before I officially made it a self-insert! It was a fic where each chapter was going to be the reader getting with another member of the League of Villains, and it would go through each one with a smut scene to explore their character and relationship.
Tomura I've written the first chapter twice but I don't know where I keep saving it. But yes, I want to write a reader-insert fic where they meet when Tomura is de-aged and the reader takes care of him and then he disappears and then the whole slow developments happen from there
Vox and Valentino Nope, but I think it would be fun! A reader-insert fic that doesn't really do any character development, but is just basically an opportunity to request your favourite Hazbin character getting dommed? That sounds like a good time.
Evil Slasher Orphanage No, I don't think I'd write a fanfiction in that universe, but maybe it would be fun! I'll have to think more about it. I feel like I care too much about them and I'd want it to be a 100k monstrosity and I'd never have the energy to make it happen.
(secondaries under the cut)
Alex No, I haven't written a fic for us. Throwing myself that heavily into Nadsat might strike me dead.
The Joker Yes, I wrote a fanfiction with my self-insert back when the selfship first happened! A lot of my lore is pulled directly from that fic.
Toshinori Yagi I haven't written our fanfiction, and I don't have any plans to: but I wouldn't be opposed to it! It would make a weird reader-insert fic because my Quirk is so specific, but at the same time, I don't know if I'd want to write it as a selfship fic. You know?
Zero Rick Nah, I don't have much interest in writing for the Rick and Morty multiverse. It's such a distinctly video format, with all the rambling and vocal quirks: I don't often enjoy reading fics about the characters, and I can't imagine I'd enjoy writing them.
Valerie Frizzle We're such a domestic selfship I have no idea what I would actually write about! Maybe a oneshot about us getting together?
Oops I ran out of energy but I'll say that I've written the first 7k of my Monokuma selfship fic, and the first chapter or two of my Dirk selfship! And the first 4 chapters of my Jonah Magnus selfship fic, which is probably one of the ones I'm proudest of.
I think that writing my Cecil selfship would be fun, but I don't think I'm interested in the rest of them.
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lefae · 5 months
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Do you know how many works your read this year?
💌 ao3 wrapped [reader edition] (accepting)
Pfft... Umm... So, small disclaimer: I'm a speed reader and tend to read mostly long fics, and due to memory issues will also reread earlier chapters of multichapter long fics to remember wtf was going on previously before reading the newest chapters (because I also tend to wait until there's at least a handful of chapters before getting caught up because otherwise I'll have to keep searching for fic immediately after just having picked one to read).
I have also been hyperfixated on Mass Effect (since introducing you to it, no less), so that's been the predominate fandom to the point that I've read almost everything in some of the tags unless it outright has stuff I won't read at all due to being NOPTs, squicks, and/or severe triggers. Like, I think there are only a handful of Nihlus/Shep fics I haven't read at all yet. And fyi, there are only 3 fics for Joker/Tali, which makes me sad and I kinda want to fix that if I can get the spoons to do so.
All of that was written mostly while I waited to get out of the AO3 frozen jail from trying to load through too many pages too quickly, so now that I can get a rough estimate based on my history, I've read close to 200 fics in 2023 - the majority of them long fics of 100k or more), and the majority of them this year being Mass Effect (including Andromeda) and/or Dragon Age, including various crossovers in some cases (I'm a sucker for a good crossover and/or AU, as you well know).
I read everything from complete fics to wips (including abandoned fics), so there's not much limiting what I'll read. The biggest thing is just staying away from the ships I don't care for, and the tropes I don't want to see, which AO3 makes super easy to avoid (especially since I also use userscripts for highlighting tags, so I have warnings highlighted as red to make them easier to find in long clusters of tags as necessary).
Lately, rarepair hell has been the most common theme I've found myself in, with some pairings having only single or double digits of fics, and most of those are really short (like 1000 words or less), so I'm always looking for the next long fic to dive into.
If I read more short fic, the number would easily be higher, but I actively sort by word count and start at the longest fics possible and work my way down through the pages. Given it only takes me a couple hours to read a 50k fic, and only about 2 nights to read a 200k fic, it's little wonder I seek them out first, unless I'm pressed for time or am having bad ADHD issues with attention span, then I might filter down to a smaller range for a bit.
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barbex · 1 year
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So I had a thought for jack/joker for Mass Effect and how that could work cause like, it was this funny idea of joker straight up telling Jack, "hey I'm fragile, so please don't jokingly physically fuck around with me" then it SPIRALED and I went to find fics. Ended up on yours, and well, this is one of the nicer rare-pair dumpster hells I've been in (:
Oh wow that's great!
I haven't written Mass Effect in so long, it feels like I'm a pretender, stuck in Dragon Age as I am.
I was very proud of that Jack/Joker fic, still am, even though I haven't looked at it in a while. I learned a lot about writing since then but I hope it still holds up 😀.
Anyway, welcome to rare pair hell! Have a cookie! 🍪🍪🍪
Thank you for your message, that was wonderful!
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crqstalite · 2 years
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Happy Year In Review 2021!!
I've certainly lived in interesting times and here's my eventual result of that. (Can't believe it's already been a year -- 2020)
WORD COUNT:
This year I wrote a total of 127,820 words (92,789 published, 35,031 unpublished). Honestly I'm a little disappointed, I thought I did more than that. Given, it's 2021, the year of crises left and right, but...yeesh. That's less than I did back in 2019. In like, two or three months.
Most of the year was out of my control though, and I'm still standing. I count it as a win.
The Breakdown:
My Mass Effect works took up about 3/4s of the actual word count, at 112,020 words written (and 22,934 unpublished, along with most of what I haven't released for Redamancy yet). My goal this year was to finish Redamancy but it had other ideas, so I'm maybe halfway through actually finishing it? That could be another year.
My Arcane works (what a surprise), are all still unpublished with posting dates being sometime in early 2021. However, they're 12,097 words by themselves so far, so it's okay. I didn't expect to end up writing for League anytime soon, but here we are.
My singular Dragon Age work this year was Bones, which was 1,879 words. Not surprised I didn't have more, it's Dragon Age. That and I lost all of the games when my account was hacked earlier in the year. Not a lot of motivation to write for this fandom.
My singular Mind Blind work this year was "Do It For Them", which was 1,824 words. It's been a while since I've really interacted with the IF fandom, so that's pretty unsurprising.
New Things I Tried:
Not much I don't think? Redamancy has actually been beta'd, every single chapter currently published has had a second pair of eyes over it (which is such a big help, you'd never notice how many misspellings you miss yourself), but beyond that I didn't really have the time or mental energy to do much else. EXCEPT for starting to write for Arcane. Never thought I'd do anything relating to League.
(God I hate the culture around League so much.)
Favorite Thing I Wrote This Year:
Probably Letters Home? Not super sure why but it is one of the few times I've genuinely liked something I wrote mainly in a non-OC's perspective. It's a working point for Joker and Citlali, which are two characters I hesitate to write together for whatever reason.
(That and it's criminal how Tiptree and Joker's feelings related to it are just swept under the rug -- it's criminal!)
Favorite Fic I Read This Year:
@ljandersen's Sideways. Easily one of my favorites (even if I'm still behind a handful of chapters -- and mentioned it last year), just for the characterization alone. I absolutely love how their Kaidan(s) and Shepard(s) interact with each other, and the little details that turn out to be bigger than anyone would've guessed. I absolutely adore the ever-growing future that they've weaved into the story, as well as how they expanded the Mass Effect universe into something all their own. I'm really looking forward to seeing where the rest of the story goes.
@shockdowndefiance's A Momentary Lapse In Judgement. Though I really loved just about every work in their library (Allison Shepard my beloved) this one really stuck with me because it really examined the coup for what it was logically and what Bioware couldn't quite do, especially for a Kaidanmancing Shepard. Allison's universe extends Mass Effect something emotionally compelling, and this fic is probably one of the best examples of that. I still absolutely love how they resolved it, as well as how Allison's character really shines through here, both as Commander Shepard as well as -- well, a regular human being. It's painful at times, but also terribly comforting.
@swaps55's Sonata. I'm such a sucker for in-between moment Mass Effect stories, especially Shenko centered ones. Sam Shepard is such a compelling character, and his relationship with Kaidan is certainly one that makes you so very mushy on the inside. Swaps' writing style is something that'll suck you in and never quite let you go, and their attention to detail is something to be admired. (Which is why I was up until the middle of the night finishing it -- definitely worth the read!)
& (last but definitely not least)
@lyrishadow's Between Times. I still read it time to time just because it makes me happy and amuses me greatly. It was a birthday gift from them to me and it still makes me really happy. I really love how they weaved both of our Shepards together to write something so nice, and how they took the time out of their life to do it.
Writing Goals For 2022
Be less on myself about writing. I was genuinely feeling so guilty and completely paralyzed out of having any fun the entire months of October, November and December just because I hadn't gotten any substantial writing done. Which shouldn't be how I feel, writing is a hobby of mine. Just because I was more likely to reach for my stylus or even one of my games than I was my bookmark for my longfic doesn't mean I'm a failure, even if I would've liked to see more progress. I mean, hell I'm a high school student who's about to graduate in a couple months -- you'd think I'd be able to afford myself the same grace I give my peers.
(It's the validation. I live off of it. I shouldn't, but I do.)
Word Of Thanks
Thanking the lovely Lock + Key writers because you guys are lovely people, (@delinquest , @glyndwrwrites , @lnewmanwrites , @tayareum , @thesupremepuff + @colonelpknight [can't tag you]) thank you for going on such a wild ride with me this year, its been so freaking fun working with you all!
The lovely @mallaidhsomo for their contributions to Redamancy and all of the useful advice they've provided me with. Along with the rest of the Bioware Fanfiction server, I might not interact much but its a very comforting place to be. <3
@that-wasnt-so-bad + @kaidans-alenkos + @mariaalenkoshepard + @actualanxiousswampwitch + @oakstar519 for being the people I always love seeing in my notifs and inbox, and the people who always have the best headcanons for the canon characters and their own.
@sheyshen + @greencrusader13 + @anchanted-one + @naaklasolus for always being there to listen to my rambly nonsense in our development channel. And responding with your own OCs because I love them very much.
@asianshep + @tali-zorahs + @metzlishepard + @dickeybbqpit + the rest of the A.G.U discord because the lot of you have been so kind to me since I popped in just for fun a while ago. Y'all are fun, and are the absolute sweetest <3 (I will track down the rest of your tumblrs eventually).
Tentatively go forth and prosper into 2022!
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engagemachine · 3 years
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so i still haven't had a chance to read your fics yet bc i just recently discovered them and am pretty busy but i'm fascinated by the concept and by mr. j's relationship with taylor, so i was wondering, is there any point where she's seen him without makeup? either in the fics or in a part you haven't written yet? (and if this is a spoiler no worries, you don't have to answer)
This is such a cool ask... I’m intrigued that you haven’t read any of my work yet but are fascinated by this relationship between Taylor and J... that is incredibly flattering. I hope their dynamic meets/exceeds your expectations when you actually get around to reading the series!
I’m going to be honest, I don’t actually remember the first time Taylor sees the Joker without his make-up. I haven’t read Clockwork in ages, and my readers probably know that story better than I do at this point. I do recall that there’s a scene in that story where he takes a shower... but I can’t remember if he actually bothers to take off his greasepaint or not. Do any of my readers recall if there’s a scene in Clockwork where she sees him without his make-up for the first time? 
As far as JK goes, I would say that most of their encounters in that story take place when he’s not wearing make-up -- this is primarily because they’re out in public together and spend most of their time together in public spaces.
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loftec · 4 years
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Hi i don't know if anyone haven't ask you about it or i'm the only one who wants to read it but CAN YOU PLEASE SHARE YOUR NOTES (ch.44) i don't know if you were serious about that but i really would love to read them cause i'm obsessed with everything what is ntw related 🖤 hope ur well
Hi friend! It’s possibly just you (or one other person, in case of separate anons) but that is enough! I was absolutely serious. 
Note on the notes! This is not all of it, because my notes for this chapter were often repetitive and very messy, and some older notes were from four years ago when I didn’t bother writing things out properly, so they barely make sense even to me. But! I’ve done my best to sort everything in some kind of linear order, and removed most of the repetition. And, well, you asked for it... sorry! 🖤
Ian shows up in the morning, Mickey digs out the magazine Iggy stole from Amelia’s dentist’s office the other day and confronts Ian about the big-ass article in Rolling Stone about IAN’S BAND, says he’s listened to some of their songs, takes out a paper where he’s written down some lyrics that sound strangely familiar.
You’re famous!
I’m in a band, people know about us right now, tomorrow they might not. I’m not famous.
You’re kinda famous.
Ian talks about Mickey recognizing him because of Frank. Hints that there might be several songs inspired by Mickey. It’s awkward as fuck, didn’t want you to know.
Were you ever gonna tell me?
Oh yeah, I had a plan. 3 dates, dinner and a movie, day out with Yev, dinner at my place turned vigorous love-making. Second prong; cohabitation, engagement, marriage, then on our wedding night I tell you about crushing on Justin Timberlake when I was 12,
then I tell you I’m semi-famous, if it still applies.
Mickey thinks his face might be on fire.
What the?
I’m fucking with you, Mick. Figured you already knew.
This again?
You angry?
No, I’m not fucking angry. Just-
Freaked out.
Kinda, yeah.
You shouldn’t be. Please.
It’s weird that I didn’t know, I feel like a schmuck. (And I’m pretty sure by your count we’ve already been on those first two dates.)
I’m sorry. I thought you knew and by some fucking miracle didn’t treat me different. I’d been gearing up to maybe have to have this conversation on our date, ‘cause it’s shit sometimes, you know? I don’t do interviews and I never talk about myself when I gotta do them, but there’s still a limelight and a lot of bullshit that complicates
I’ve been crushing on you since we met basically, and I thought I’d just… let it run its course, keep my mouth shut about it and deal until it went away and we could remain friends without me fucking it up.
Didn���t work, by the way.
Good.
Mickey is talking about it with Etch, who suggests that Ian’s been writing at the diner for a reason.
Etch looks up some lyrics and Mickey caps locks them to Ian
You might have inspired a few lately…
Fuck off. How many?
Since we met? Pretty much all of them.
Maybe one or two made it on to the album, but I wrote those before we really got to know each other so they’re just like… about moments, and how I would feel around you.
Didn’t think of it as creepy but it kinda sounds that way now.
No it’s fine
I won’t do it again.
Said it’s fine. Kinda like it.
Yeah?
You gonna tell me which ones are about me, or is that a secret too?
What are you doing tonight?
Thought you said you were going on tour?
We are, it starts tonight. It’s a small fan club gig here in Chicago.
You have a fan club?
Kinda. I’ll put you on the guest list if you want to come.
(Mickey calls Svetlana to make sure Yevgeny can stay with her over the weekend.)
It’s fine if you don’t want to, we’ll do something else when I get back.
Calm your tits Gallagher, course I wanna go. Needed to make sure I’ve got Yev covered.
Oh okay, good. You’re on the list. Doors at 7, gig starts at 8, no support.
You’ve got no chill.
(Ian doesn’t answer for a while)
I like it.
Good, that was torture. Never doing that again.
(Etch teases him about having his nose in his phone, and makes him aware of new guests arriving)
Gotta get back to work
Yeah, me too. See you tonight?
No chill at all.
Ian invites him to the concert and gives Mickey his phone number. Mickey makes sure Yevgeny stays with his mom on saturday, and after work he goes home and gets ready. Showers and cleans himself thoroughly, puts on cologne and a band t-shirt he hasn’t worn in ages, it’s gotten kinda tight on him since he got it. (He puts on a dress shirt first, tucks it into his pants and glares at his reflection).
He’s on the guest list when he gets there, the girl in the box office can’t find him at first but then Anne shows up and points him out, he’s on the VIP list and gets a pass that he’s told he needs to carry so it’s visible. He makes a point of shoving it in the admission guy’s face, but then shoves the ostentatious thing down the pocket of his jeans. Anne shows him in and tells him about the gig, about how the fan club got started. Anne says he can go backstage but he says he’ll pass, thank you. He gets a beer and finds a good spot, there’s a balcony halfway through the venue where he’s got a perfect view of the stage without having to stand in the front.
They text a little, Mickey says he’s there and Ian says he’ll make a sign when they play a song inspired by him.
run-through of the concert, Ian touches the side of his nose when the song is about Mickey. He’s sexy as fuck, and has some ridiculous stripper moves.
He takes off his hoodie at some point, and sweating through his tank he and Anne put on gloves and start hitting the barrels with crowbars.
Anne is the maestro, maybe Ian crowd surfs at some point? Warren Ellis that violin, man. He has little routines with Anne, and some with Jon too. One song, Anne gets one of his guitars and he does noisy stuff with his violin and plays on the oil barrels with Stran, completely in sync.  
They got some good stage banter going, and at some point Ian does a Tom Waits impression, and Anne groans and says he’ll sing the whole thing if they’re not careful. There’s a reason why he’s
For the encore, Ian touches the side of his nose and they start playing a song, Anne saying that this is a first. It looks like Ian is about to sing, but then it looks like he changes his mind and they start playing a song that Mickey sure as fuck hope isn’t about him. The insufferable man on a date right next to Mickey tells the woman he’s with that they were about to play the mysterious title track from their last album that never ended up on the record
“it’s derivative, but cute”
how can it be a title track if it’s not on the album
the guy talks about how he’s got a friend working as an engineer in the studio and he’s sent him an early demo version. It’s not their best song by far, but it’s cool that pretty much no one else has heard it.
Mickey asks the girl if she’s ok with this joker, and she says she’s fine. He offers to get her a cab or something, if she wants to get out of there.
She says she’s not interested
Lady, if I wanted to get with either of you, it wouldn’t be you. Just sayin, I ain’t picky, but that guy would’ve gotten the boot ten minutes into the date if he were here with me, no offense.
WHAT IF.
The concert is over, and crowd starts to let up. Then a fight breaks out at the front and Mickey makes his way towards it. It’s over before he gets there, and sees a guy in his 40s with a bleeding nose, and Lip shaking out his fist, a security guard between them.
Mickey talks to the guard and defuses the situation, putting the bleeding man in the position of a sad overzealous fan. It somehow warms Lip to him, absurdly, and he finds himself apologized to, Lip shaking his hand and wincing when Mickey grips his bruised knuckles a little too hard. Lip vaguely explains that that was an old ex of Ian’s, a real piece of work, and then offers Mickey to come backstage with them to see Ian. Mickey declines.
It’s Lip, Carl and Debbie (Liam is too young, and Fiona too pregnant).
“I was drunk, and wrong, and when I’m wrong I say I’m wrong. (IT’S FROM DIRTY DANCING YOU LITERALLY FORGET EVERY TIME AND HAVE TO GOOGLE IT WHENEVER READING THIS NOTE should I really be quoting Baby’s dad in this fic? Probably. If anyone can, it’s Lip.) And Ian tells me you’ve been there for him a lot lately
I wouldn’t say that
But he did, he doesn’t tell me a lot these days, but he told me that.
Mickey gets another beer at the bar as people mill towards the merch and exit, he sits on a stool with an eye on the backstage passage. He watches the band come out to talk to some of the lingering fans and sign shit. Ian comes out and is immediately surrounded by fans, he locks eyes with Mickey across the room and Mickey raises his beer in a silent cheers. Ian comes up to him after a few minutes, he looks damp and exhilarated and unexpectedly nervous,
How was it?
Not bad, Gallagher.
he asks Mickey over. He has to pack up his shit and do the rounds, but he’ll be done in half an hour, tops. Mickey says he’ll meet him outside.
Ian leaves and Mickey finishes his beer, watching Ian talk to some fans, signing shit and taking pictures. He goes for a piss and then goes out for a smoke.
Ian comes out after twenty minutes, carrying two guitar cases and a large wheelie-bag. Mickey takes one of the guitars off his hands and they walk together.
(maybe Ian has a banjo and he gives it to Mickey to carry and Mickey is all really? I wanna kick your ass so bad right now, country boy, but then carries it anyway.) (banjos are cool)
Walk from the club. Mickey mentions talking to Lip. They talk about Ian’s Tom Waits impression. You’re not musically illiterate at all! Talk about Mickey’s Radiohead tee that he stole from a hookup when he was sixteen, he’s grown into it now. Talk about Ian’s onstage dancing, used to be a stripper, well, not saying you can’t still do private performances (?? you know what I mean! this is not what they’re saying but you’ll remember it) (Note from 2020: I DID NOT REMEMBER IT.)
Talk about wanting to learn playing the trumpet. Don’t have trumpet playing lips.
”Sure you and your lips can do whatever you set your heart to, I believe in you.”
Looks at Mickey and smiles.
”What?”
”You’ve been flirting with me since we first met, haven’t you?”
”Maybe.”
”Huh”
“What?”
“Oh nothing.” “Just re-evaluating everything you’ve ever said to me.”
”Re-evaluate this;” gives Ian the finger.
”That an invitation?”
”Fuck you is what it is,”
“sounds like an invitation.”
Ian tells him a little about his different instruments, Mickey picks up the beat up guitar Gus first gave to Ian and strums it, Ian asks him to play him something but Mickey snorts and says he’s counting on getting laid tonight and him playing would be detrimental to that plan. Ian doesn’t think so, but accepts it when Mickey gives him the guitar.
”I’ve walked some thousand miles,” he starts softly, eyes on his left hand, moving over the strings, ”I have slept many hundred nights, and people’ve said hello and bye through the years since you were mine. But don’t think I’ll stop my mourning, don’t I know it’s overdue. Just because I’ve gotten older, none the wiser I cry for you.”
”Honey, cutie, sweetie-pie,” ”My darling boy, sweet old times, as long as I keep you in mind I will remember what love is like. So, don’t think I’ll stop my mourning, don’t I know it’s overdue.”
”Just because I’ve gotten older, none the wiser.”
”I cry for you.”
I’M THINKING OF WRITING MY OWN SONG BECAUSE I WAS THIS MOMENT TO BE MORE BEFORE SUNSET THAN ANYTHING, ALL SMILES AND DRAMA FREE. SO MAYBE A TEXT THAT IS A LITTLE MORE STRAIGHTFORWARD.
Ian plays the song and when he’s done, Mickey kisses him and they have really enthusiastic sex on the couch. Mickey is about to leave after when Ian invites him to stay,
How about some long-ass foreplay on the couch and then they move into the bedroom.
They start on the couch, they take it to the bedroom, they collapse on the bed after and Mickey is feeling too good to argue when Ian mumbles at him to “stay”.
(Sings the song, says it doesn’t mean anything. It’s just a song, it’s one quick thought put under a spotlight. Feeling like he should have known Mickey his whole life already. It’s too much, isn’t it? In the kitchen.
”do you normally take guys home and serenade them?”
”nah, don’t think it’d be very effective with most.”
”But you figured I’d swoon?”
”Figured you’d want the truth.”
”which is?”)
??? Need to find a good mix of excitement and new and easy, balanced with ho shit wtf are we doing this isn’t going to end well i think i fucking love him shut the fuck up. needs to be sexy and a little rough, as well as painfully sincere against better knowledge. kissing will do that. they’re doing stuff the way they usually do stuff, but for some reason it feels completely different.
Important that Mickey kisses him.
They stand up and stand chest to chest, Ian says they don’t have to do anything, Mickey says shut up and get naked
he helps ian take his shirt off and kisses him the second his face comes back into view
They fucks on the couch.
OR ALT FADE CUT END and don’t go explicit. Just saying, it’s an option. A valid option.
They can go at it in one of the sequels? Like the roadtrip can be more explicit? If I want? But also not?
I mean, there is such a thing as a nice middle ground right.
I just don’t think I’m interested in going all out porn after 40+ chapters of whatever.
THEY KISS AND THEN THERE’S A MOTHERFUCKING FADE TO BLACK MY FRIEND, BECAUSE THAT’S WHAT I HAVE DECIDED. Soz
WHAT IF!!
Iggy comes in, is all: guess what I found at the dentist this morning?
M: again? Did Amelia break another tooth?
I: It’ll grow back, take a look at this
E: Did you steal that from the dentist’s office?
M: Rolling Stone, wtf?
E: your dentist’s got rolling stone?
Mickey reads the headlines out loud as a customer comes in and asks Etch about something they’ve lost the other day, and Etch starts rifling through boxes behind the counter as Mickey moves over to sit down in Ian’s booth, rifling through the magazine.
M: what am I looking for?
I: I marked the page
E: what’s this note?
Mickey starts reading the article, realizing that the blurred picture is of Ian, and the interview is with Ian, and holy shit. Ian is legit famous.
Etch starts reading the list of coffees, eventually turning the page over and pointing out that there’s a phone number.
Iggy comes to the diner in the morning, Etch is rifling through stuff behind the counter and Mickey is doing the rounds with the few guests still there after the morning rush.
Iggy shows him the magazine he found at the dentist’s and Etch is in the background like wtf is this, reading from Ian’s note with the coffee orders, Mickey only half listens, trying to take in the fact that Ian is fucking famous.
Etch says there’s a phone number too and Mickey brushes him off.
Then he’s like, hold the fuck up! And gets the note from the trash and tries the number, and Ian fucking answers. And they have the you’re famous conversation on the phone and voila, Mickey has his number and vice versa.
So Mickey calls Ian in the morning, then there’s text talk during the day.
From Ian
So, you’ve had my number for x days and you only now decided to use it?
That’s cold.
From Mickey
You wrote it on a piece of paper you then balled up and threw on the floor, asshole, it’s a miracle it didn’t end up in the trash. didn’t know I had it until this morning.
You suck at this. (This is a nice revelation that he likes, but Maybe that doesn’t come across in text.
Not a complaint btw, just gleeful observation.
From Ian
Are we still on?
From Mickey
Of course.
Dumbass.
Ian
I probably deserved that.
At some point Mickey starts capslocking and sending lyrics to Ian, who has to explain through text why he’s written songs about Mickey, saying that he’ll point them out tonight.
HERE’S A QUESTION
SHOULD I SKIP THE WHOLE “WRITING SONGS ABOUT MICKEY” BUSINESS??
Isn’t it enough that Ian is famous and kept this fact from Mickey? Isn’t the writing songs business a little creepy? and if he did write songs about Mickey, would he really publish them without Mickey’s consent? No. Maybe I’m deliriously tired and about to fall ill right now, but I actually think I should skip that part. It’s a little sad because it’s been part of this idea for three years, but if I’m uncertain about it now imagine how I’m going to feel about it later?
When I started writing this story, it was supposed to be a quick and silly thing, and now it’s something else. It’s not important or anything, but also it is. To me. And making a decision on the rating was a big deal for me, and I think this is another one of those things. I’ve been holding on to this idea for so long but when I really think about it, is it even romantic? It’s romantic in that kind of teenage dream way, maybe? It’s more romantic to me if they fall in love for reasons other than Ian writing songs. But he’s written NTW, and he still thinks about performing it live, but we skip the whole thing about songs being about Mickey.
So they talk on the phone in the morning, and then there’s a text coming in after a little while asking if Mickey wants to come to the show.
HEYHO IT’S A REVOLUTION AND I FEEL FREE
Mickey and Ian text after the show (after Mickey declines going backstage) Ian asks him to meet him round back in twenty minutes. When Mickey goes out there, he sees Ian talking to a couple of fans by the bus and Mickey hangs back to smoke while he waits. The fans leave and Ian looks around, checks his watch, he has a bunch of guitars with him.
I AM LEANING HEAVILY TOWARDS MICKEY KISSING IAN HERE. He’s like “Stop, hold this” giving Ian back the guitar, so he can grab on to him and kiss him, smiling against Ian lips as the guitar tips over and clatters against the asphalt.
They’re outside Ian’s house, Ian says he has to get up at an unholy hour tomorrow. Invites him in anyway.
They’re in the elevator, then they’re in Ian’s apartment. Ian plays him the song, Before sunset ending.
almost none of that rhymed, just letting you know. kinda embarrassing.
(almost none of that rhymed, just letting you know. kinda embarrassing.
yeah, it’s not a very good song. is why we cut it from the record
oh yeah? thought it was ‘cause of the like, intensely personal subject
that too)
They smile at each other like fools and Mickey feels like he is exactly where he’s supposed to be, and there’s no rush. Fade to black.
Etch finds the paper, says there’s a phone number on it. Mickey dials the number and goes out back as it rings out. When Ian answers, he reads a question from the interview and they talk.
He goes back into the diner and basically blows the whole thing off, it doesn’t make any difference to him and he has to go back to work. Yevgeny does his homework and Iggy leaves, and Ian invites Mickey to the gig via text. Etch invites Yevgeny to stay over at theirs for a movie night.
Does Mickey tell Yev about the gig?
Start with Mickey out back, smoking. The phone rings and he waits for Etch to take it, but it keeps ringing. He bangs the door and yells PHONE and then it stops ringing. He kills the cigarette and goes back inside. Etch is behind the counter talking on the phone and going through the lost and found, looking for whatever the caller has lost. Mickey clears a table. It’s afternoon. Etch hangs up but keeps going through stuff in the box, talking to Mickey, when Iggy comes in.
It’s maybe more like afternoon (?) when Iggy comes in and shows Mickey the magazine. He calls Ian and they have a quick conversation (he probably goes outside to have it, to escape his audience) and they establish that Ian is sorta famous. Then they text back and forth a little, until Ian invites him to the show.
Mickey calls Svet to arrange it so Yev can stay with her, and then accepts. He goes home after work to eat, have a shower and change out of his clothes. He wears the only band tee he owns, mostly because it’s funny and because it’s kinda tight and he doesn’t think he looks too bad in it (and a dress shirt is way too much for a concert not-date, not that he tried on a couple first. Then he does a little bit of cyberstalking only to find very little personal information and a lot of crazy fans. Maybe he watches a couple of music videos, but they’re all really weird cartoons so they give him nothing. They’re cool though, and guess the music’s alright, even though he doesn’t have a connection yet to it so it’s hard to tell if he likes it.
Yevgeny calls, because Mickey switched the days and he wants to know why. Mickey asks if he knows about the Broken Bells, and Yev’s like duh who doesn’t? And freaks out when Mickey tells him about Ian. He doesn’t tell him about the whole date situation though, just that he’s going to the concert. Maybe Yev asks for some merch.
Mickey takes an Uber to the venue, even though it’s not too far from the diner (but on the other side, so at least a 30 minute walk) and it seems like they’ve already started letting people in. He hangs back until the admissions office is clear and then tells the lady that he’s on some kinda guest list. She can’t find him, and he’s about to give up and go home when he sees a familiar figure in the background. He calls her Stay-puft first, but then also remembers that her name is Anne and calls her that too. She remembers him, and finds him on a different (VIP) list, the venue staff woman is embarrassed, but Anne is borderline flirting she’s so nice about the mistake. Mickey gets a pass that he’s supposed to keep around his neck, but he shows it to the guards and then tucks it down his back pocket. Anne shows him inside the venue and asks if he wants to come backstage and say hello, but he kindly declines.
He has a quick peruse of the merch table (he checks the CDs, and then sees a smaller table next to the merch with a guy handing out pins, Mickey talks to him and finds out that it’s “fan club” pins to commemorate the gig and Mickey asks if his VIP pass gets him one, it does, and then the guy asks if Mickey wants to sign up for the newsletter) and then gets a beer, before finding a good spot on the mezzanine floor. He’s got a balcony railing for support and beer holder, and he’s got an excellent view of the stage. The floor is filling up with people packing themselves against the front. He texts Ian saying he’s here and they text a little back and forth. He gets someone to watch his spot and goes to the restroom. There, he finds a kid getting cornered by a middle-aged man. The kid looks vaguely familiar and not older than sixteen. Mickey steps in and casually accuses the guy of creeping on a kid and the guy immediately backs off, the kid says thanks and that he’s eighteen (because it’s an 18+ gig) and Mickey says sure.
Getting back to his spot, There is a douchebag on a date behind him that he wants to move away from, but he doesn’t want to surrender his good spot. He decides to tune him out, he’ll hopefully shut up once the set starts. It’s just a couple of minutes after eight when the lights dim and a song comes on louder than before, and the band start coming out on the stage. Ian is wearing jeans and a hoodie, like he normally does, but he’s clean shaven and his normally smiling face is set in blank determination. Anne is the front person, and she commands the audience with the slightest gesture. It’s obvious that the venue is filled with old fans, they all know exactly what to do exactly when she asks them to do it. Ian’s got like four guitars and a whole lot of other shit around him, and he’s super focused on doing his stuff, but now and then he does little routines with Anne and Jon, and gets a big cheer for his occasional solos.
A few songs in, Ian gets up to stand on one of the oil barrels, and Anne starts banging on it with a crowbar. That’s when Mickey starts to really get into it. It’s cool, and it’s a lot harder than Ian made it out to be, but kind of theatrical at the same time. Ian is brilliant, even though he dances like an uncoordinated stripper.
There is banter between the songs, mainly between Anne and Stran (girl sure bangs those drums!) Anne starts banging one of the oil barrels again and Ian and Jon do a little step dance next to each other across the scene.
At some point Ian takes off his hoodie. He’s wearing a white tank and he’s already sweating through it. He gives his guitar to Anne and puts on gloves. Him and Stran do a little bant-y thing and then they start a new song by both banging the barrels in unison while Anne and Jon start playing (maybe Jon plays something else, like an electric piano or a marimba?). At the crescendo of the song, Ian takes out a baseball bat and goes to town on the barrel, sweat shining on his muscly arms and his wet hair flopping down his forehead.
They go off the stage, but come back when the crowd chants a song, stomping their feet and clapping their hands. Anne says they’ve got one more song for them, and they start playing. She moves away from the microphone and it looks for a second like Ian is going to step up and sing. Douchebag behind Mickey tells his date about an unreleased b-side to the last album. But then Ian steps back and says something to Stran, who nods and moves into a slightly different beat. Without blinking Anne, steps back up to the mic and sings the last song.
Some of the crowd lingers by the stage after the lights have gone back on, but most move towards the bar or the merch table. Mickey hangs back to watch the crew take down the stage, and the two oil barrels being handed over to someone in the audience, along with set lists and left-over picks. Walking down from the mezzanine floor to go look for the restrooms, a fight breaks out on the floor. Mickey immediately recognizes one of them as Lip and the other one as the creep from the bathroom, and intervenes by clearly positioning himself on Lip’s side and reminding the creep that he could get him in trouble, the creep backs off and agrees when Mickey tells the security guards it was an accident (in a way that isn’t obviously helpful, but in the end still makes sure that Lip isn’t hurt or arrested for punching a guy) (because he did, he punched a guy, who is thrown out by the guards after Mickey’s intervention). Lip, Carl, Debbie, and Liam is there, but it’s only Lip who knows who Mickey is. He hangs back to talk to Mickey while his siblings go backstage (and PROBABLY DOESN’T tell him a little bit about the guy being Ian’s ex, making it clear that Lip really doesn’t like him). He also apologizes to Mickey for last time. He asks if Mickey wants to go backstage, but Mickey declines. He’s decided earlier with Ian through text that he’ll wait for him and thinks it’s better to do it somewhere that isn’t backstage where he might get asked questions and have to talk to people who aren’t Ian.
He gets another beer and stands in the bar next to the merch, watching as Ian and the rest of the band come out to sign some stuff and shake hands. Ian still looks slightly damp from sweat, even though he’s obviously changed clothes and run a towel through his hair. Mickey wonders if his skin tastes like salt. He drinks his beer.
Ian comes up to him after a little while, asking well? (or texts him, which probably makes more sense? But I also want Mickey to see Ian post-show)
Not bad Gallagher, not bad at all.
Ian looks pleased and asks if Mickey wants to come over, even though Ian has an early morning. Mickey says yes and Ian asks him to wait until they’re done packing up.
Mickey finishes his beer, goes to the restroom (where he sees douchebag by the urinal) and then he goes outside to wait for Ian. (He talks to douchebag’s date and offers to get her a taxi before the guy comes out.) He smokes a cigarette, and before he knows it, Ian is by his side, carrying a fuck ton of guitars. They decide to walk, for some reason, talking on the way.
HEY
Ian says he’s got a car coming and they walk a little bit to where they’re getting picked up. They talk about trumpet lips and stuff and Mickey kisses him. They get interrupted by the car arriving, and Ian picks up his guitars and says “you coming?”
Fuck yes
They sit in silence in the car, but it’s a good one. Ian says
Lip told me what you did back there.
He didn’t tell you shit.
He did, told me you stepped in and stopped him from getting arrested
He was getting his ass kicked, someone had to help the guy
And Liam told me you got him out of a tough situation in the restroom
That was Liam? Some pedo’s creeping on a kid by the urinal, I’m not gonna stand by doing nothing.
You know that’s not what happened
Yeah, well, that’s my story and I’m sticking to it.
He isn’t a pedo, and Lip would’ve beat the shit outta him if you hadn’t stepped in.
You defending this guy?
No, trying to say thanks.
You’re shit at it.
Thank you, Mickey
Better.
So… friend of yours.
No. (Ian isn’t forthcoming with the info)
Alright, whatever.
And he’s definitely not someone I wanna talk about, tonight.
(Ian is smiling at him, all the promise in the world in his eyes)
Fucking fair enough.
They arrive.
OR Ian joins Mickey outside and they stand around and talk
They talk about Ian’s Tom Waits impression. You’re not musically illiterate at all! Talk about Mickey’s Radiohead tee that he stole from a hookup when he was sixteen, he’s grown into it now. Talk about Ian’s onstage dancing, used to be a stripper, well, not saying you can’t still do private performances (?? you know what I mean! this is not what they’re saying but you’ll remember it)
Talk about wanting to learn playing the trumpet. Don’t have trumpet playing lips.
”Sure you and your lips can do whatever you set your heart to, I believe in you.”
Looks at Mickey and smiles.
”What?”
”You’ve been flirting with me since we first met, haven’t you?”
”Maybe.”
”Huh”
“What?”
“Oh nothing.” “Just re-evaluating everything you’ve ever said to me.”
”Re-evaluate this;” gives Ian the finger.
”That an invitation?”
”Fuck you is what it is,”
“sounds like an invitation.”
That’s when a taxi pulls up and Ian walks toward it
Could use some help with these.
They ride in silence
They carry Ian’s instruments from the car, and Ian says something cute
Mickey’s like “Stop, hold this” giving Ian back the guitar, so he can grab on to him and kiss him, smiling against Ian lips as the guitar tips over and clatters on the asphalt.
They’re outside Ian’s house, Ian says he has to get up at an unholy hour tomorrow. Invites him in anyway.
There he asks Ian to play him something that other people don’t get to hear (mostly to be a cheeky monkey, but also because he wants it) and Ian plays him None the wiser.
I’ve walked a thousand miles to end up in your corner booth
Grinning idiot when you bitch, falling fool for your dirty mouth
Sitting on my busy hands when you swagger by and I say -
Hey waiter, pour some coffee in my cup and bring me my toast, before you fuck me up
I’ve been in some thousand fights and it’s clear that so have you, too
Faded threats and cigarettes, sharp glass polished by the sea
Wish you’d put your hands on me and make your feelings clear
Hey waiter
meet me ‘round the back door, tell me I’ve got it wrong and fuck me up some more
‘Cause I’ve fallen a thousand times but never felt this way before, like I should have met you long ago
Walked with you by my side and had your back through thick and thin
Sickness and health, come what may, and I say-
Hey waiter
pop the damn champagne
None the wiser
you fuck me up again
Hey waiter
tell me you’ll be mine
I’ll give you my life
and fuck you up in kind
I wish I was just a plain white shirt
then you could wear me off to work
and I’d be one of the things you keep close to your heart
soft white cotton wrapped around your heart
(Contrasts have faded now
but color still haunt my mind
And words ripped off from their lines
Make bitter tears flood my eyes
Don’t think I’ll stop my mourning
Don’t I know it’s overdue
Just because I’ve gotten older
None the wiser, I cry for you)
Honey, cutie, sweetie-pie
My darling boy, sweet old times
As long as I keep you in mind
I will remember what love is like
So, don’t think I’ll stop my mourning
Don’t I know it’s overdue
Just because I’ve gotten older
None the wiser, I cry for you
’Cause I always say ’I love you’
when I mean ’turn out the light’
And I say ’let’s run away’
when I just mean ’stay the night’
But the words you want to hear
you will never hear from me
I’ll never say ’happy anniversary’
Never stay to say ’happy anniversary’
Bom-chaka bom-chak 23 verses
And he climbed up a mountain
And he looked around
Some kind of forest
With all these dinosaurs
And he stripped his woman
He stripped her bare
But there was a pterodactyl
There!
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