#i just genuinely cant imagine getti g cared for in that way. i dont think it will ever happen.
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ohhhh i see now. i am mentally unwell.
#vent#?#hating life tm for no reql reason.#beenf feeling like that all week actually#kinda just wanna die#but ive resisted the urge to self harm! still falling back on substance abuse but thats a differnt thing for a different day.#everything jsut sucks. and when i finallt get the opportunity to be loved the opportunity gets stolen.#is it too much to ask for a night with one person i love? i juts get so overwhelemed i find it so hard to be with everyone at once...#how can i have everything ive ever wanted and still feel so empty?#fuck#i kinda wanna die huh?#maybe i just should.#like id *really* be missed.#everyone who says they care about me i think would merely give an 'oh okay' to finding out im dead.#i just genuinely cant imagine getti g cared for in that way. i dont think it will ever happen.
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