#i just. dont kno anymore. i cant picture anything good abt life now or in the future. or myself and my life different from now. and i kno
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i know i need to get help if i ever want to get better but i just dont know if i want to get better anymore
#personal#i just. dont kno anymore. i cant picture anything good abt life now or in the future. or myself and my life different from now. and i kno#thats the depression talking and fucking what not but im just. so over trying. i try so fucking hard all the time over everything and it#feels like its never noticed. it just seems like i dont do shit ever. im tired of all the effort. of all the work.#i kno this also means i rlly need to reach out to friends bc i kno they would help. and would much rather me alive but just. i feel like#every time i talk to people its all about fucking me and im over being selfish. they can only do so much anywag#they cant fucking make me better or make me want to try or give me the energy to put in the work#idk maybe its just better to not
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