#i love the idea of Donnie being an absolute twitter menace

[anastoundingmango]

all of them are such cringe teenagers. they’re perfect

[aquariumgirls]

ok so i have an idea for a fic/series abt the turtles revealing themselves to the public and becoming new most beloved heroes n shit BUT. its also gonna be set in 2023 (current year) and so im getting some hesdcanons written down basically.

STARTING W BIG RAPHIE!

- raph is 20, has been on hrt for 5 years and works at a daycare in the hidden city ^_^ (donnie synthesized it bc they do that for leos hormones and their own as well)

- shes very shy going outside at first bc shes big (over 8ft tall!!) amd spiky but everyone sees her as the big softy she is immediately :] and well. if anyone says anything bad abt her theyll have to deal w her three menaces of little siblings

- she has a hello kitty tattoo on her forearm

- princess peach is her biggest style inspiration! she mends and hems her own clothes to fit around her shell and knits sweaters every winter and donates them to clothing drives

- cried at the amount of people who said "hi barbie!" to her both before and after seeing the barbie movie

- infiltrates leos twitter lives to pick him up by the scruff of his neck to make him go to bed and people go absolutely nutty abt it (basically: OMG SHES SCRUFFING HIM LIKE A KITTEN, LMAOO GET SCRUFFED IDIOT, LOVE HOW SHE TREATS HER SIBLINGS LIKE UNRULY CATS)

- diagnosed Big Dog Energy by twitter

- does makeup asmr lives on twitter and youtube bc people tell her that her voice is nice

- most active on her youtube channel which is mostly her annoying her little siblings (in her words: they've been annoying me for my whole life, time for payback)

- theres a meme of her standing in donnies doorway menacingly. she's holding a blanket. the caption was "im going to get burrito'd someone write my obituary"

- posts pictures of their siblings when they've been burrito'd. even april isn't safe

- one time april stole raphs phone and showed a photo of raph burrito'd instead

- pinned tweet is her crying over a nearly 7ft tall teddy bear plushie someone gave to her as a thanks for saving the world

- she has a custom build a bear

- fosters puppies and kittens frequently! has two foster fails. one is a greyhound named alice who she raised from a bottle baby, and another is a gigantic maine coon named ghost bc he's all white and blind. ghost wraps himself around her neck like a living fur scarf. the cat is absolutely massive btw stretched out heslike half her size

NEXT IS...NEON LEON

- leo is 19 and shooting up like a weed (7ft 2)

- frequently uses mikey and donnie as armrests to be annoying (donnie will bite him. leo is undeterred)

- has a sick ass bionic arm courtesy of donnie! always makes arm and a leg jokes w donnie bc theyre both menaces

- works at run of the mill :] may or may not have a crush on a certain bunny waiter...

- is actually very good at customer service

- is the second most active online, and the most open w his face and being seen in public! cried when a kid said that he was their hero and is haunted by the videos of it

- tried to steal a duck in broad daylight.

- dresses like a modern eboy sorry.

- has (almost) as many piercings as donnie! almost. doesn't have snakebites, but has a septum piercing, eyebrow piercing and hangs little earrings and general things from his mask tails!

- every time hes in the background of a video, he default dances. it doesn't matter where he is, whos recording, he *knows*. its become a meme

- casually refers to cj (who is 17, almost 18) as his son. refuses to elaborate

- can be found basking in central park when its sunny enough, usually alongside mikey

- loves to say "me n donnie are actually identical twins you just can't tell bc we're turtles"

- has a yt channel where he covers songs, usually glam rock

NEXT................DONATELLO W A BOOK IN THEIR HAND

- 19 like leo (04 babies RIIIIIIIISE)

- scarcely goes outside in the daytime but when they do they're usually in the most extra outfits they have. ("if i have to be forced into the sun, i may as well dazzle!)

- people kept asking them if they went to barbie or oppenheimer. they went to barbie, duh?

- has so. many. piercings. snakebites, septum, bridge, cheek piercings, eyebrow. half their face is metal

- unsuprisingly modern cybergoth.

- wardrobe is either black clothes or purple clothes.

- genius built is an actual fully fledged company now, and they are very proud! and also they make a lot of money. (they donate most of it to charity, because eat the rich)

- is the frequent victim of 0.5 pictures bc of their snoot

- has a joke asmr channel (plague doctor tells you that you're dying asmr, carpenter finds bees in your walls asmr, sickly victorian child begs you for money asmr)

- is Tall. they seem much taller bc theyre lanky as hell (6ft 7)

- frequently speaks at colleges, except when people hear that purple is speaking at their college they dont expect a Goth As Hell Turtle with a snoot to rival a borzoi. most people guess their aesthetic incorrectly and donnie thinks its hilarious

- there are compilations of them smiling/laughing over the internet. the most common one is them laughing so hard they can barely breathe after someone called leo "lame-o-nerdo"

- is most frequently spotted at the local target. they like trinkets

- one time a guy tried to flirt w them and they politely redirected him towards leo

- came out very nonchalantly on a live. donnie was texting someone in the bg of one of leos lives and the chat kept asking omg what r they smiling at!! and they looked up and said "my girlfriend duh" and when people started saying YOU LIKE GIRLS??? they started directly into the camera w a vaguely confused expression for 10 seconds straight before saying "of course i like girls??? im a lesbian??" and three echoing voices shouted "I THOUGHT YOU WERE AMERICAN"

- the clip went viral. obviously.

- theres a clip of donnie biting an entire watermelon and it exploding

- is actually very open to taking photos w people ^_^ loves it when kids come up to them and say they look cool/shiny. never fails to make them cry

LAST BUT DEFINITELY NOT LEAST.......MIKEYYYYY

- 18! though he doesn't really care bc its not like he can vote anyways

- puts graffiti up on the weirdest places

- accidentally mentioned knowing rupert swaggart on twitter. also accidentally revealed that his dad is lou jitsu which made splinter get a twitter

- has a tattoo sleeve in progress that works around his mystic scarring and also sketched out hamato clan tattoos for his entire family which they then all got

- suprisingly has less tattoos than leo. but unsuprisingly less than donnie, who went absolutely batshit.

- favorite tattoo is his tattoo of karai on his shoulder

- apprentice tattoo artist in the hidden city, also made his own hot sauce (and was the first turtle to go on hot ones. never broke a sweat ofc unlike raph who almost immediately started crying from the spice)

- was dared by leo to scream "IM MAKING FUCKINH MACKING CHEESE IN THE MICHEAL WAVE" from a rooftop. he did it, recorded it, and pinned it on twitter

- lethal puppy eyes can and will be used on anyone and everyone. its how he gets away w so much

- small still (5'11)

- sometimes shows up on leos song cover channel along w donnie

- posts recipes on twitter and instagram

- instagram is literally just pictures of food

- loves to go sunbathing and will sit in a quiet park for hours

- ate an entire orange, peel and all, in front of st least 12 children as a dare

- no piercings but has silly bandz hooked onto his mask

- visits local art colleges frequently

- showed up on donnies joke asmr channel (the video was my little brother reads an entire cookbook front to back while i lay dead on the floor. raphs cat decided to start kneading donnies shell halfway in and then promptly loafed on them for the rest of the video while mikey tried very hard not to laugh)

- met beyoncé. cried.

GROUP HCS.

- leo and donnie will take off their respective prosthetics as jokes often. leo will offer someone a hand and detach his arm. donnie has thrown their leg at people. more than once. theres compilations of it. theres an unexplained no context video on leos twitter of donnie in the living room, detaching their leg, opening a hidden compartment and then proceeding to shake out nearly a thousand fake plastic spiders along with a truly uncountable amount of batteries. the video ends with donnie snapping their head towards the camera and shouting "DON'T REVEAL MY SECRETS DIPSHIT" before lunging at leo

- theres multiple videos of the disaster twins being a disaster as raph slowly approaches from behind them, scruffs them like cats and then flings them over her shoulder like particularly unruly sacks of flour. theres also compilations of her holding her siblings under their arms like cats. donnie seems to be the most receptive to it, bc they could be angrily ranting snd then raph picks them up and they just. dangle. pupils dilated and content to be carried off.

- theres a video of raph gnawing on an impressively large tree branch in the woods, illumimated only by a phone flash. she looks almost guilty in it.

- mikey took a video of his three aquatic siblings in the rain and titled it "turtle zoomies"

the video shows raph contentedly soaking in the rain, tail swishing in a particularly deep puddle. leo and donnie are chasing each other at inhuman speeds while chirping. raph looks at the camera and smiles before donnie runs into her, to which she then decides it's time for cuddles. leo runs at the camera and the video ends.

- donnie showed up on leos song cover channel and covered both world is mine (obviously) but also to the hellfire by lorna shore, metal screams and all. people have begged them to make their own song cover channel but they just said "why make my own when i can just steal my brothers?"

- the turtles accidentally revealed having mafia ties ala big mama ("oh yeah we have a mom too! not by birth though. big mama!" "THE FUCKING LEADER OF THE SPIDER MAFIA??" "the WHAT.")

SORRY THIS IS REALKY LONG