#i may add to it when i have time but i’m just swamped with uni and big depressed lol.

[heartate]

riot is constantly retconning and rewriting their lore for not only individual champions, but runeterra as a whole, and while i love getting more lore, it gets so irritant with how often it happens and i am particularly attached to my own lore at this point so i’m going to have to sit down and figure out what i’m going to do about the vesani lol 😭

because they certainly did not exist when i wrote my origin lore post for ahri years ago, and i would like to retain my lore of ahri where she doesn’t learn and develop empathy until she’s been eating the memories and emotions of her victims, and draining them to husks without remorse 😫

[starkerforlife6969]

Replying to anonymous messages! As usual, no prompts will be filled here! Just me replying to some love whilst not spamming anyone MWAH x 

1) Omg so I have an idea for the mafia!Tony au with bodyguards!Steve and Bucky etc and I was thinking what if Tony totally makes out that hes the Big Boss™ in front of everyone but Peter, Steve and Bucky know better coz in the bedroom Tony totally loves it when Steve and Bucky top him and for his birthday he got dicked down by Steve and Bucky while little Peter rode his dick to oblivion

that is a gorgeous idea you gem, but unfortunately i don’t write bottom Tony :(( I’m so sorry! My writing skills are just not versatile enough! While I’d love to read it, I couldn’t write it well enough :(( Please love me anyway! 

2) OMG THAT LOUNGE SINGER PETER FIC IS SOOOO GOOD ITS EVERYTHING IVE EVER WANTED PLEASE TELL ME WE’LL SEE MORE OF IT.... ALSO SUPERSIZE ME IS AMAZING AND NO PRESSURE OBVIOUSLY BUT ARE U CONTINUING IT? LUV U

I AM GOING TO CONTINUE IT YOU UTTER UTTER GEM!!!! Aahhhhh!!! Supersize me will get continued...eventually. I wish I could say when but I’m so swamped at uni at the moment and any spare moment I have I spend usually writing for tumblr! :( I WILL get back to it though, that’s a promise I’m making you and myself! 

3) Can I ask who the piano player is? Love your blog btw

Hahahah, that’s a great question and I have zero answer for it. Maybe Bucky?? He strikes me as a really good piano player. Surly disposition, heart full of gold and music. 

4) Holy shit I would die for a sequel to the mob and singer post one day that was amaxing

THERE WILL BE ONE, GORGEOUS! 

5) P-Please sir, may we have some more?? Like CHRIST that one shot was hot 😩 mob boss Tony is so peng

Hahaha, there will be more, with actual smut this time ;) 

6) Wow, the way you write dark, possessive, mob/mafia boss Tony is soo unbelievably hot and amazing! You're definitely one, if not THE best fanfic writer out there! ❤ although I have to say that you're a little tease to end your latest fic before they had sex, I would just love to read that! 😍😁

hahaha I am a tease, and like I said to 5) there will be a sequel WITH actual smut hahahaha! Love you gorgeous! and oh my goodness I'm all red with your compliments, my head will explode. Flattery will get you everywhere! x

7) Hi I hope you're doing well, just wondering, would you ever consider writing a part 2 to your Alpha steve x Omega peter college AU? It was seriously so amazing xx

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR LIKING THAT AU! It’s one of my favourites and I definitely, definitely plan on getting back to it. Rn I'm obsessed with starker, but spider shield will come back to me soon and as soon as it does- Im there! 

8) @betty-bloom “How are Omegas raised in The Green? Also, who are the other omegas with their Alphas? And thank you for adding me in the tag! I appreciate it a lot! It’s wonderful!”

Oh my goodness, you are too sweet. Haha and what fabulous questions! I’ll definitely have to do either a back in time one, or where they go and visit some of peter’s friends because right now, I just have a vague lil idea. Like a sweet little home for these omegas, very posh and proper teaching them how to behave and how to bake/garden with lots of rec time. Very soft and sunshine based, I think. 

9) what are the "bookmarks" in ao3 for? ://

Good question! I’ll explain the best way I know. So, you can bookmark a story to save it- when I finish an amazing story I bookmark it and add a little note like “holy shit this is so good read it again” so on days when I wanna read, instead of searching for a new story, I can go through my bookmark list. You can also bookmark a story when you’re only part of the way through and add a note like “chapter 4″ so you can remember where you were and easily find the story again.    People can also search through other people’s bookmarks. For example, If i read an author’s story and it’s so good and they don’t have any more (sad face) I go onto their bookmarks because most of the time, people like stuff similar to what they read- so if this author has bookmarked stories, chances are I’ll like them too! Not always, mind you, but a lot of the time this is a great way for finding new stories!    You can also add your own tags, for example if you didn’t think the author tagged it the way you would have.   And in case I did a horrible job (I think i did hahaha) here’s the link to ao3 explaining. Hope this helps!!! 

10) love your mafia au! would you ever consider doing an installment where peter gets seriously hurt and the boys freak out?

WOULD I?!?!?! GIRL IT’S ALREADY IN THE WORKS YOU GEM. 

11) Hey bb!!! I was wondering if ur still planning on updating the super size me story and also what does the title mean?

*sobs* I will update it I promise!!! I just have no idea when! As for the title um that’s a great question, I guess I thought i was being hilarious but I’m really not. It’s what I say whenever i get a cheat day and order fast food or want an extra large cup of coffee, I always say “super size me plz”, but i thought it could work like- supers...superpowers...big dicks...size kink...am i weird? I think so. HOPE THIS HELPED I LOVE YOU. 

12) Please more mafia!!! Its so great and it honestly got me back into fanfiction lol. Your an Amazing writer like ahhhhh

Wooo! Had to sit down after this one, *hot flush* alert thank you so much you gorgeous beast! I will write more, don’t worry! I don’t think I can ever give that au up hahaha x

13) Can you do more fairy Peter? Because I honestly live for it❤

CAN ?!?!? YES YES I WILL! thank you so much for liking it, honestly it’s gearing up to me my favourite au and i wanna do loooaaddsss. I just need ideas!!!

14) fairy peter part 2 pretty please? I love your writing and you inspire me so much, thank you 💙

Hello blue heart, you are a gem and I love you and I promise more fairy peter is coming! xxx

15) Hi! Do you take prompts? Because I have lots of ideas and I love how you write ❤

YES I DO TAKE PROMPTS AND I WANT THEM ALL GIVE THEM TO ME! Sometimes it’ll take me literally forever to write them, other times they could come the next day, it’s just what takes my fancy, you know? BUT I’D BE SO HAPPY IF YOU GAVE ME SOME! 

16) @idksrerek Just wanted to let you know I adore your writing!! Hope you have a fantastic day :)

oh my goodness this is too sweet i cannot deal with it. thank you so much i HOPE YOU HAVE A FANTASTIC DAY TOO 

17) your blog is literally perfect ❤️❤️❤️

fdbhfkbfeqjkqeq I DO NOT DESERVE YOU OH MY GOSH AHHHHH IM SCREAMING thank you so much this made my day. 

18) I check ur blog like every day and I screamed when part 5 of the mafia au came up LOL thank u

you are the sweetest thing in the whole entire world! i can’t wait to make like 100 parts for that au. 

19) Part 2 of Alpha Steve and Omega Peter college au? I need it

it’s coming i promise!!!!

20) Omg I’m kinda like DYING for a sequel to the Harley!Peter prison Drabble if you ever get around to it! 

THERE WILL BE I LOVE THIS AU AND IM SO GLAD YOU DO TOO! 

[dragonfics]

Thanks (again) to @itsladykit I was inspired to write some silly rom-com style TwistedHoneyMoney. The exact words that started it were “Twist/Rus, Cash/Rus, Twist/Cash love triangle (the kind that ends in polyamory, but starts with a rivalry between Twist and Cash)”. How was I to say no to a good old-fashioned love triangle? (Especially one with a Tale-verse monster sandwiched between to Fell-verse idiots).

Relationships: TwistedHoneyMoney (Twistfell Papyrus/Underswap Papyrus/Purple Swapfell Papyrus) (The poly relationship is not yet established in this chapter)

Summary:  Fell-verse monsters have a strange method of courtship—one some might deem a little unorthodox (or, in the words of certain monsters—undignified). Then again, it takes a fool (or two) to underestimate the duplicity of a Tale-verse monster. After all, isn’t it always the ones you least expect?

Tags: Non-explicit sexual content (this chapter), flirting, teasing, unconventional courtship

Warnings: Nothing serious, but this may come across as a sort of “cheating” (though no one is in an established relationship). Everything is consensual however, and the rivalry is in good-spirits (for the most part). But... they are assholes. I’m not even going to try and deny it.

Just two chapters for this one! It was meant to be a one-shot, but I went completely overboard with the “courtship”. (I would also like to apologise to anyone waiting on the next chapter of Argent Night. Unfortunately, I’ve been a bit swamped with uni stuff, so I’ve had to delay the update. I’m hoping to get the next chapter out by next weekend.)

With that all out of the way, I hope you enjoy!

~Beneath the cut~

When the Barrier had broken, and monsters had reached the Surface, it had soon become apparent that certain members of their race were more suited to life among humans than others. While many monsters settled comfortably into their new lifestyle, some found themselves struggling to adapt to the everyday norms of human society.

“Public transport? What a concept! Why on earth would I travel out in the open where anyone could attack me without warning?”

These more ill-fitted monsters were dubbed ‘Fell-verse’ by the gentler portion of their cohort, given the widespread notion that they were merely ‘fallen’ versions of the average monster.

Naturally, the Fell-verse monsters were not pleased with this distinction, and chose to name the softer members of their species ‘Tale-verse’—as an act of petty revenge (in their own eyes, at least).

“Utter airheads, the lot of them! Waltzing around as if life is some sort of fairy-tale.”

But despite a few initial disagreements, the Tale-verse and Fell-verse monsters soon came to develop a sort of fondness of each other (though neither would ever admit it openly). Though they still butted heads occasionally, their fascination with each other took over many early misgivings.

Compassion, joy, and zest were all fairly foreign concepts to many Fell-verse monsters. So it came as quite a shock to them when the Tale-verse monsters displayed such things so openly. Words like ‘naivety’, ‘absent-mindedness’, and even ‘stupidity’ were thrown around by some. Others, however, found themselves quite enthralled by the sweeter monsters, and many Fell-verse monsters were soon to be seen wandering the streets in the company of Tale-verse monsters.

And indeed, the Fell monsters weren’t the only ones intrigued by their counterparts. Many Tale-verse monsters derived amusement from the brash behaviour of Fell-verse monsters. More than once, a Tale-verse monster would have to explain the common social etiquettes of human society to a Fell-verse monster.

“He wasn’t trying to kill you, he was just offering you a drink.”

And, as time took its course, the question of Tale-verse and Fell-verse monsters entering ‘intimate relationships’ with each other arose. At first, the mere suggestion was met with utter indignance.

On the Tale-verse end, one often heard comments such as: “Utterly absurd! Can you imagine actually trying to tame one of those creatures long enough to have relations with it? I, for one, am content to let them ravage each other instead of those of us with a little dignity!”

And, on the Fell-verse side of things: “yeah, i guess i’d fuck a—heh—tail-verse or two. but, like, do they even know what they’re doin’? … do they know what fuckin’ is?”

Yet for all the doubts and naysaying, nature inevitably took its course, and soon, relationships between Fell-verse and Tale-verse monsters came to be—rare, though they were.

It soon came to the attention of the Tale-verse monsters however, that their Fell-verse counterparts had a fairly… abnormal method of courtship. Many seemed to lack the charisma acquired to ‘woo’ the Tale-verse monsters—a fact they made up for in blunt, unashamed forwardness. And though this approach had its benefits (most Fell monsters weren’t overly fond of small-talk), its success rate was fairly laughable. As it turned out, Tale-verse monsters tended to expect a little more decorum from their suitors.

Another trait which seemed prominent among Fell-verse monsters, was the (sometimes mildly aggressive) tendency towards competitiveness. And in the case of seduction, this often led to the unabashed art of bragging of one’s conquests. It soon became a point of pride, for one to be able to say that they had been intimate with a Tale-verse monster. After all, what sort of social prowess must one possess to be able to seduce such an enigmatic creature?

 Twist, a skeleton monster (and one of very few, at that), could make no claim to possessing any degree of subtlety or finesse when faced with social encounters. What he didn’t lack however—was confidence. While he’d never been one to brag (at least, not explicitly), his list of Tale-verse conquests was to be admired. Whether it was his words or his reputation—few could be sure—but Twist seemed to possess a knack for charming his way into the beds of Tale-verse monsters.

Cash, another Fell-verse skeleton, could make similar proclamations about his sex-life—and he did. Though a little shy of Twist’s level of confidence, Cash was a very proud monster, and took great strides to ensure the word of his prowess spread as far as was possible. Though he lacked Twist’s charm (and for Twist, ‘charm’ was probably a generous descriptor), he certainly had no shortage of affluence. When his wits failed him, he always had his wealth to fall back on (and it served him well).

But, as it stood, neither Twist nor Cash were quite satisfied with the list of successful Tale-verse endeavours to their names. There was one they would have liked to add—a monster they’d both had in interest in for quite some time.

Rus was a Tale-verse skeleton—and a rather fascinating one at that (in the shared opinion of Twist and Cash, in any case). Though Tale-verse through and through, Rus was rather a curiosity for the two Fell skeletons. He smiled—a lot—yet there was something behind his smile that left the mind wondering. The smile was by no means false, but it held a certain degree of ambiguity, which stirred an element of uncertainty—and intrigue—in the Fell-verse skeletons.

Being of the same ilk, Twist and Cash saw in each other a competitor for Rus’s affections. While both had yet to make a move on him, the tension between them had been present for a long time. And it was on a warm Friday night—at one of the skeletons’ weekly gatherings—that these tensions rose to a head.

****

Twist was a monster who made it his mission to spend as much time in public as his schedule allowed. So when the Tale-verse skeletons had proposed a weekly ‘pub night’—a visit to their neighbourhood’s local watering hole—Twist had been one of the first to speak up in favour of the idea (in spite of many of the other Fell-verse skeletons’ protests to the ‘Tale-verse nonsense’). And once the tradition had begun, Twist had become one of the few (if not the only) to attend every single gathering.

And this week was no different. He sat at the bar, sipping his drink and observing the other patrons (monsters and humans alike) chatting and laughing away. It was a relatively quiet night, and only a few of the skeletons had deigned to show up. Rus and Cash were both in attendance, and as it stood—very much occupied by each other.

Twist watched, the corner of his mouth twitching in amusement, as Cash made his very best effort to hold Rus’s attentions. They were seated in a booth along with two of the other skeletons—Red, and Blackberry (Twist’s brother). But neither Rus nor Cash were paying much heed to the other two, sitting a little closer to each other than was perhaps necessary for an ordinary conversation.

But Twist knew it would be a while still before Cash was ready to make his move. The set of his shoulders was tense and anxious, and he barely seemed able to maintain eye contact with Rus for more than a few seconds. Twist would have been more than eager to indulge himself in the entertaining activity of watching Cash squander each passing opportunity to seduce Rus for the entire night—but, Twist wasn’t known for his patience, so after downing the remainder of his drink, he stood and crossed the bar.

As he approached the booth, Rus and Cash both looked up (the latter appearing a little less than pleased at the intrusion). “Heya, Tale-verse,” Twist addressed Rus, grinning.

“twisted,” Rus greeted in response.

Cash was giving Twist an apathetic glare, and Twist lifted a challenging brow-bone before returning his attentions to Rus. “Y’know, ‘m feelin’ a little pent up—ya wanna head back ta my place fer a couple a’ hours?”

Twist knew he was taking a risk; though this very direct method of enticement had worked in the past, Rus was difficult to read. Cash, on the other hand, made no effort to hide his bewilderment. “for goodness sake, twist, ya can’t just—”

“sure,” Rus responded, standing. Cash blinked, clearly stunned (in truth, Twist couldn’t claim to be any less surprised, but he refrained from revealing as much). Rus shot Cash a smile. “i’ll see you later, moneybags.”

Cash seemed to be struggling to find words, looking crestfallen as Twist slung an arm over Rus’s shoulders, pulling him against his side. “Don’ worry, Patches, I’ll take good care a’ him,” Twist said, knowing full well that the nickname embarrassed Cash to no end.

True to his nature, Cash blushed a pale shade of violet, ducking his head and turning his covered eye away. Twist chuckled, and pressed his teeth to the crown of Rus’s skull. “Ready ta head off then, sweetheart? I’m as good as they say, promise,” he added, with a wink.

“oh, i don’t doubt it,” Rus said. “and if you prove to be better—maybe i’ll even consider fucking you again.” Twist took no small amount of delight in the smug grin he was able to cast in Cash’s direction as he led Rus from the bar.

Needless to say, he’d won.

 And, as it turned out, Rus was just as profound a partner as Twist had been hoping (more so, even). His stamina was surprising for someone of his HP, and he made very little effort to keep himself quiet (which Twist appreciated immensely). He was also astoundingly more attentive than Twist had been expecting—leaving Twist more satisfied than he could have hoped for.

As they lay beside each other on Twist’s mattress, Twist couldn’t help but grin to himself. “Gotta say, Tale-verse, I’m impressed,” he said, a little breathlessly.

“i’d be offended if you weren’t,” Rus replied, smirking. He rolled over, pressing himself against Twist’s side and resting his head on his shoulder. “you weren’t half bad yourself.”

Twist was somewhat startled by the gentle display of affection—and had to remind himself for a moment that Rus was a Tale-verse monster. Well, though unfamiliar, it certainly wasn’t anything Twist was opposed to. After a moment’s hesitation, he returned the gesture, wrapping an arm around Rus. It felt… nice.

The pleasant haze of their afterglow was broken by the dull buzz of Rus’s cell phone. Casting Twist a sheepish grin, he untangled himself from his arms, turning over and answering the call. “heya, cash. what’s up?”

Twist froze in disbelief. Why would Patches be calling now…?

“what am i doing…?” Rus turned to cast Twist a wink. “something unfathomably stupid.” Twist stifled a snort, but watched Rus carefully. There was no chance Cash was simply calling for a friendly chat; his motivations were undoubtedly less than honest. “hmm, your place?” Rus’s response to whatever Cash had said confirmed Twist’s suspicions. “tell you what—why don’t you give me an hour? that work?” Rus stifled a snort, his gaze flickering to Twist. “yeah, i’ll shower first, you asshole. see you soon.”

For a moment, Twist had to remind himself not to gape. He stared at Rus as he hung up, struggling to hide his bewilderment. “Yer… meetin’ up with Patches?” he asked cautiously, ensuring he hadn’t misunderstood the phone call.

Rus flushed slightly, but smiled, his eyes darting away from Twist. “yeah… something wrong with that?”

Twist blinked, trying to comprehend the situation. While Cash’s intrusion was not unexpected—Rus’s agreement to his offer certainly was. Still, Twist wasn’t one to back down so easily—though he couldn’t stop Rus from engaging with Cash tonight… he could certainly delay him. “We still go ‘n hour, don’ we?”

Rus shrugged. “i suppose.”

“Good.” Grinning, Twist rolled them over, straddling Rus’s hips. He leaned down, kissing the surprised look off Rus’s face. “’Cause I’ve got a few more things I’d like ta do ta ya before ya go.”

Twist considered it a victory that Rus didn’t have time to shower before he left.

 Twist made sure to awake before sunrise the next morning. His bones ached pleasantly from the previous night’s activities, and his magic felt considerably warm and settled. After a quick breakfast, he made his way to the nearest bus stop. He was at Cash’s house before seven. Not bothering to ring the bell of the ridiculously pricy penthouse, Twist waltzed inside—noting that Cash seemed to have forgotten to lock the front door. He certainly must have been eager.

To Twist’s surprise, Rus was sprawled out on one of the lavish sofas in the living room, fast asleep. Cash was nowhere in sight. Shooting a cautious glance at the staircase, Twist approached Rus, placing a light hand on his shoulder. “Hey, Tale-verse,” he whispered, as Rus blearily opened his eye sockets. He blinked at Twist in surprise, a hint of amusement in his features.

“twisted… couldn’t stay away, could you?” Rus murmured through a yawn.

“Nah.” Twist grinned, climbing onto the sofa beside Rus. “Patches made ya sleep on the couch?” he questioned, lifting a brow bone.

“who says we were sleeping?” Rus asked, smirking.

Twist chuckled, leaning in. “Wanna not sleep some more?”

Rus snorted. “you sure have a way with words, twisted. do you want me to suck you off or eat you out?”

Twist grinned, feeling victorious. Leaning in, he pressed their teeth together, satisfied by Rus’s soft hum of appreciation. “How ‘bout both?” he murmured, nipping at Rus’s jaw.

Rus drew away to regard him with dubiety. “now you’re just being greedy.”

“Why waste a mouth as exquisite as yers on jus’ one form of oral?”

“well now, how can i say no to such a sweet-talker?”

Twist couldn’t decide if he was more satisfied by Rus’s performance, or the look on Cash’s face when he emerged at the top of the stairs to find Rus with his head between Twist’s legs.

 A week passed without incident (sexual or otherwise), and it wasn’t until the skeletons’ next gathering that Twist saw Rus and Cash again. The day was hot, and Twist was thankful for the cool air-conditioning inside the bar. What he was not so thankful for however, was the sight of Cash and Rus huddled beside each other in one of the corner booths.

By all appearances, things seemed fairly normal (but, perhaps, for their proximity to each other). But as Twist drew closer, he came to notice a rather strange expression on Rus’s face. He looked almost pained, and light beads of sweat dotted his skull. It was only when Twist caught Cash’s expression—an almost vindictive grin—that he realised something more was at play.

Any other monster would have shied away the moment they caught whim of what was going on between the two skeletons—but Twist wasn’t just any monster. Shame was something relatively foreign to him, and without qualm, he sat down beside them, shooting Cash a broad grin. “Heya, Tale-verse—Patches—what’re ya up to?”

Rus’s eyes went wide, a heavy blush sinking into his features. But when he opened his mouth to speak, Cash cut in, leaning over to regard Twist with a challenging tilt of his head. “not much. i was just givin’ rus a hand with somethin’. isn’t that right, sweetheart?” Rus blushed deeper as Cash’s teeth grazed his neck, but he nodded (a little breathlessly), remaining silent.

Twist observed them, projecting unfazed amusement despite the frustration Cash was igniting within him. “Well,” he said, shrugging with casual indifference and leaning back, “don’ stop on my account.”

“we weren’t,” Cash growled, and Rus whimpered softly, turning to bury his face in Cash’s chest. But Cash stopped him, holding him at bay with his free hand (the other was currently… occupied). “nah, love. i want ya ta look at him. go on. turn around.”

Rus stared at Cash for a few seconds, tears leaking from the corners of his eye sockets, before turning hesitantly to look at Twist. Cash pressed his teeth to Rus’s acoustic meatus, whispering something too quiet for Twist to hear. But given the sudden heated look that crossed Rus’s features—it wasn’t difficult to guess the nature of Cash’s words.

Twist knew walking away would be admitting defeat, but he still felt thoroughly put on the spot. Embarrassment wasn’t really an emotion he was familiar with, yet he could feel magic tingling beneath the surface of his bones. Rus’s expression was an enticing mixture of bliss and discomposure, his eyes straying from Twist’s face, and his cheeks glowing. Though Twist would normally be more than inclined to enjoy the display, Cash’s complacent smirk was very off-putting.

He relinquished to sit and watch, forcing his features to appear neutral, until at last Cash pressed his hand over Rus’s mouth to muffle his cries, and pulled away. “you were perfect, darlin’,” Cash murmured, running his tongue over Rus’s neck, while keeping his gaze firmly locked on Twist. “gonna go wash my hands,” he said, sliding out of the booth and casting Twist a triumphant smirk. “don’t worry, love, i took good care of ‘im.”

Twist watched Cash go, pressing back the retorts he itched to speak. When Cash was out of sight, Twist turned to Rus, who still looked a little flushed. Shuffling over, Twist traced his fingers over the back of Rus’s hand playfully, leaning in to murmur, “Need me ta take ya home, Tale-verse? I can give y’a ride.”

Rus glanced at him, lifting a brow-bone. “you don’t drive,” he pointed out.

“Not that kinda ride, sweetheart.”

By some miracle, Rus agreed. Twist was more than obliged to continue his rivalry with Cash—indeed, he was rather delighted. The competition was thrilling—seeing the mix of outrage and frustration on Cash’s face every time Twist gained the upper hand was immensely satisfying. Not to mention, Rus was a damn good fuck.

****

Cash had never been one for socialising. He tended to avoid human (and monster) interaction as much as physically possible, and spending time in the presence of crowds was a peeve of his. He had been one of the first to reject the bullshit Tale-verse suggestion for a ‘weekly hang-out’. In fact, the first time he had attended had only been at Twist’s unrelenting insistence.

He had attended every one since.

Cash liked Rus. He liked talking to him, being around him, touching him. He was all sweet smiles and soft whispers and subtle glances that made Cash feel wanted. So on that warm Friday night, Cash’s soul had leapt a little when Rus had chosen to sit beside him. Him—and not that Twisted asshole who kept shooting them glances from across the bar. Cash made sure to establish the fact that Rus’s attentions were his for the night. He shuffled close to him, leaned in, and did his best to smile and engage.

But for the life of him, he couldn’t seem to get the right words out—hell, he could barely look at Rus without blushing. And before long, Twist was standing beside their booth, his body angled in such a way that flaunted the sharp curve of his hip and displayed just a sliver of his clavicle. His eyes were on Rus, but Cash caught the brief smug glances in his direction.

When Rus left with Twist, it felt as if a dagger had embedded itself in Cash’s chest. His fists trembled at his sides, and he could do little but stare at the hard oak of the table as his magic boiled. He caught a glimpse of Blackberry’s smug half-smile across the table, and snapped his head up, teeth gritted. “somethin’ to say, berry?”

Blackberry sighed, sounding almost pitying. “You’re not going to win against him, Cash,” he stated simply.

Irritated, Cash cast a glance at Red, who merely shrugged in concession. “yeah, uh, sorry bud. the twisted’s got ya beat by a mile an’ a half.”

Cash stared at both of them for half a minute before standing abruptly, marching for the door without so much as a ‘goodbye’. He seldom bothered mustering the energy for petty competitions—but Twist somehow seemed to know just which of his buttons to push, and Cash was nothing if not stubborn. He would not be losing this.

 Relief flooded Cash when Rus picked up on the other end of the line around an hour later (a very small part of him entertained the idea that Rus had been hoping Cash would call). And Rus’s unfaltering agreement to come over sent Cash’s soul aflutter. He couldn’t help but grin to himself as he hung up, wishing more than anything that he could see the look on the Twisted bastard’s face.

When Rus arrived an hour later, he was looking a little dishevelled. “you smell like sex,” Cash remarked, letting him in.

Rus hummed in agreement, crossing the room and flopping onto one of the plush sofas. “uh… yeah. that’s normally what happens when you have sex.” Cash felt a sick pit settling in his chest, and he grimaced. Seeming to sense his discomfort, Rus quickly shook his head, smiling. “but… feel free to try and prove me wrong.” His tongue danced over his teeth, and Cash felt warmth pooling in his groin.

After pouring them both a glass of his most expensive champagne, he sat beside Rus, who seemed more than grateful for the drink. “are you trying to get me drunk, cash?” he asked, lifting a brow-bone in teasing.

“i’m trying to give you the treatment you deserve,” Cash told him, smoothly. His breath stuttered as Rus’s hand glided slowly up his femur, settling just beneath his pelvic inlet.

“fuck me on this sofa, and i’ll consider myself treated,” Rus purred, pressing his teeth against Cash’s neck. Though Cash normally turn his nose up at the thought of sullying his pristine couches—he decided to make an exception for Rus.

And oh, was he glad he did. Though fucking Rus was sweet and gentle, it was nothing like Cash had imagined it to be. Though Rus was soft and considerate—he was by no means submissive. Even as Cash pounded into him, he could feel Rus guiding his movements, encouraging him, whispering words of praise and adoration.

When Cash came, it was with tears in his eyes, and Rus’s name falling from his mouth. He flushed at how embarrassingly quickly he had reached his climax, but Rus seemed unconcerned, almost immediately curling up against him and falling asleep.

A little startled at the unreserved display of trust, Cash carefully pried himself out of Rus’s arms, gathering a blanket and draping it over him before hurrying upstairs, his cheeks burning. A small bloom of pride unfurled inside him—where Rus had only remained with Twist for a mere hour, he had chosen to stay with Cash for an entire night (even if he was only sleeping on his sofa). Cash almost considered joining him, but decided against it, the thought a little daunting.

Needless to say, the fury and despair he felt at finding Twist in his living room the next morning with Rus’s face buried in his crotch—was unfathomable. Cash vowed nothing short of bitter revenge in return.

 A week later, he delivered on his promise.

The blistering heat of the day did nothing to quell the heady agitation of Cash’s magic, and he was more than grateful when he found Rus sitting in their usual booth alone at the bar. Sliding in beside him, he pushed his misgivings to the back of his mind, and slung his arm over Rus’s shoulders, leaning into him. “bit warm today, isn’ it?” he remarked, satisfied by the look of surprise on Rus’s face.

“i—i suppose it is,” Rus said, seeming a little taken off guard by the physical gesture. This delighted Cash, and he tugged Rus closer. He could feel the heat radiating from his body, and dared to indulge the idea that Rus might be just as horny as he was.

He turned his head to press his teeth to the angle of Rus’s jaw, feeling a shudder go through Rus as he scraped his teeth over the bone. “hmm… you smell delicious, y’know that?”

Rus’s breath hitched as Cash’s fingers found the waistband of his pants, teasing at the base of his spine and iliac crest. “i—the others might be here soon,” he murmured, his breathing beginning to quicken.

“do you want me ta stop?” Cash asked, pausing.

“i don’t… n-no.”

“good,” Cash breathed, his fingers finding the pool of magic which had settled at Rus’s pelvic inlet. “because i really don’t want ta stop��� and besides, pretty sure the twisted asshole is the only one showin’ up today.”

Rus pulled away slightly to glance at him, a brow-bone lifted in skeptical amusement. Cash flushed a little, suddenly wishing he hadn’t spoken. But to his surprise, Rus only grinned and leaned close to whisper, “well then, we’d better put on a damn good show.”

By the time Twist arrived, Rus was barely short of a mess of sweat and magic in Cash’s hands (or, hand, rather). The sudden expansion of Twist’s eye-light didn’t surprise Cash, and he smirked as he caught Twist’s gaze. He was a little surprised when Twist sat down beside them—even more so when he remained where he was after it became obvious that Cash wasn’t stopping.

Cash heaved Rus closer, wrapping his free arm around his chest possessively, and whispering obscene words against his skull. Throughout the encounter, he refused to release Twist’s gaze—the bastard needed to learn that Cash wasn’t one to accept defeat so easily. For once, Cash found himself struggling to read Twist’s expression. His eye would occasionally stray to Rus’s face, but for the most part, he seemed to be having difficulty keeping it off Cash.

When Rus came, Cash pressed his hand over his mouth to silence him, despite the rowdy chatter that filled the bar. He allowed Rus barely a moment to catch his breath before leaning in to smooth his tongue over Rus’s neck. “you were perfect, darlin’,” he breathed, softly, carefully gauging Twist’s response. To his disappointment, Twist appeared (for the most part) unaffected by the display, but for the pale flush of magic around the spiderweb cracks of his eye socket. Giving Rus’s femur a gentle squeeze, Cash stood. “gonna go wash my hands.” He glanced at Twist, a smile twitching at the corners of his mouth. “don’t worry, love, i took good care of ‘im.”

As he walked away, Cash preened at the way Twist’s jaw clenched—just a little. Though he knew this competition of theirs was far from over, he couldn’t help but revel in his small victory. While he was more than enjoying the pleasure of Rus’s company, he was beginning to find himself quite thrilled by Twist’s small slips in composure. The idea of seeing him fall apart completely was… more than intriguing.

****

The feud between Twist and Cash continued for weeks. With Rus as their weapon of choice, they tormented each other to no end—going so far as to interrupt one another in the midst of their ‘revenge schemes’. One positive at least, was that Rus seemed to have no complaints in regards to the arrangement. If he had any reservations about his role in Twist and Cash’s rivalry, he made no mention of them. Truth be told, he appeared a rather enthusiastic participant.

But, one Friday night at the bar, their antics were brought to a rather abrupt end.

Twist’s hand had somehow found its way up the back of Rus’s shirt, and he had his fingers curled around Rus’s spine—a predicament Rus seemed quite satisfied with. Particularly when coupled with the feeling of Cash’s sharp fingers on his ribs. The look on his face was something akin to deep bliss—though the same could not be said for Twist and Cash. Over Rus, they shared a piercing glare, each determined to outdo the other.

It was only when Edge (who had been observing the endeavour in silent distaste after being quite forgotten by the other three skeletons) loudly declared, “Oh for fuck’s sake, Rus—would you just pick one of them?”—that Twist, Cash, and Rus all came to a simultaneous halt, looking up at Edge in surprise.

Immediately, Twist and Cash exchanged a frantic glance. In the midst of all their attempts to best each other, not once had it occurred to them to simply ask Rus which of them he preferred. And suddenly, all attention was on the Tale-verse skeleton, who faltered beneath the gazes of the other three. “w-well…” he stammered, averting his gaze.

“… well?” Cash was quite literally sitting on the edge of his seat, his fingers clenched around the corner of the table. “which of us is it?”

Rus shook his head, releasing a quiet, humourless laugh. “look—it’s not that easy. i—”

“C’mon, Patches,” Twist interjected, shooting Cash a dubious grin. “It’s obviously me. Ya can’ even last more than a couple a’ minutes.”

Fuming, Cash opened his mouth to snap back at Twist—but Edge quickly cut in, sighing. “Aggrandising your own sexual prowess isn’t going to achieve anything, Twist,” he said, sharply, silencing Twist. “It’s precisely how the two of you landed yourselves in this dilemma in the first place… Rus?” Something unspoken seemed to pass between Rus and Edge—an understanding beyond what Twist or Cash had the capacity to comprehend in that moment.

Rus glanced between Twist and Cash anxiously, resting a hand on each of their arms. But their surprise at the unexpected gentle contact was nothing compared to when Rus quietly confessed, “i… i want both of you.”

[ratherbeem-blog]

Progress check, number whatever

1. I definitely haven’t been keeping up with the whole fortnightly blogging thing, that’s pretty obvious from timestamps and such.

2. I’m still spending far too much time scrolling through reddit and far too little time reading books. I haven’t made any progress with The Day The World Came To Town, and I had to return my library books unfinished.

3. I volunteered for the FIRST Lego League in my hometown, and my old school won. I still need to get more involved in something in my new town though.

4. I’ve met up with my whole group of sixth form friends - we went to the reunion together, and also went out for pizza. Mine was vegan! I also briefly met up with Toby, a friend I hadn’t seen since high school after the FLL. As for uni friends, I got Marissa a birthday present and also went to a tournament and saw some of my first year buddies. I watched University Challenge with my old society last week too! Of course, I met up with Robert and Ryan on Friday too - I’m really pleased with how this reconnecting stuff is going. I did a slightly daft chain thing on Facebook and it got some old acquaintances popping up, too.

5. No dinner parties yet, but James and I are considering not eating any meals out in February, so I’d love to invite Robert and Ryan around for one.

6. Haven’t borrowed a pet, but I did visit my parents and played with their dogs. We also keep meeting friendly cats on our way to the train station. We’re going to a cat cafe next weekend, hopefully.

7. Things are looking good on the emergency fund front at the moment. I just paid the rent, James hasn’t paid me back his half yet (his pay day is tomorrow), and my pay day is next week, but I’ve got a respectable £2515 in my bank account at the moment. I know that I had £100 in August, so I’m managing to put away about £400 per month even though I’m over-paying tax at the moment.

8. We loved Ireland, and now we’re looking at the “where next” question. We want to do a big bucket-list style trip to the USA eventually (all of that all-American goodness that you don’t get in the UK: road trips, Broadway musicals, extreme couponing, hovercrafts over swamps...) but we’re hoping to go on a few smaller trips in the meantime. I’d also love to go interrailing, possibly over the summer.

9. I’ve bought the perfect little book of index cards for making my own recipe book, and so far I’ve committed one recipe to it - a vegan lentil and bean chilli with hidden veg that I kind of made up. I need to write down the things we love, though.

10. I remembered that I have another fun fact - when I was 19, I got banned from all wind turbines in the UK. It was the first day of my volunteer job as a wind turbine tour guide, and they took me up the turbine to show me the type of tour I’d be leading. The view was great, but it turned out that I’m very badly effected by the combination of 60m spiral staircases, high humidity and the slight swaying of the tower as the blades went by. I promptly lost my breakfast, and am no longer allowed in wind turbines. I need a new one, though - currently I’m just wearing zany jumpers as a substitute for a personality.

11. Getting a follow-up GP appointment has been kind of impossible, but I have mostly been feeling better and have enough tablets to last a while longer. I’ve been eating better since starting Veganuary, and as of this morning, I weigh 15st 11lbs - this is still much higher than ideal, but it does mean I’ve lost 6 lbs so far in January and I’ve lost 10 lbs since whenever it was that I started tracking my weight. The aim is to start exercising more - I’ve got a skillshare membership and I’m hoping to try a yoga class through that.

12. I spent a while talking to my brother when I went home. We opened up to each other in person, but haven’t talked since. It’s my grandpa’s 90th birthday in March, so I need to plan a visit.

13. I’m working towards and OCA Java qualification in my free time at work, and I’m hoping that I’ll be ready to take the exam by about May or June. I know that certificates aren’t necessary as a programmer, but I want to add another string to my bow. I’ve also been tooling around with Plunker in my free time at work, and I’ve written some simple web applications.

14. Completed it, mate.

15. I’m nearly all the way through Veganuary, and I’ve only made one slip up that I know about so far - yesterday, I bought a cereal bar in Costa that was labelled as dairy-free, and I couldn’t see any obvious non-vegan ingredients at a quick glance. When I was half-way through eating it, I realised it had honey in it...

16. No concrete plans for another show yet.

17. Veganuary has really improved the amount of fruit and veg I’m eating - today was a kind of lazy day where I thought I was eating terribly, but I still had edamame, sweetcorn, kidney beans, sweet pepper, canellini beans, broccoli, spring onion and red pepper today. On weekdays I’ve been trying to have fruit and oat smoothies for breakfast, which stop me from snacking during the day, and usually contain 3 servings of fruit, and then either salad or leftovers for lunch, and then something with at least a couple of veggies for dinner.

18. I’ve been a bit all-over-the-place recently, so I haven’t really bought much “stuff”. We did buy our sweet peppers and pak choi from the market, and we’ve had some really good wholemeal bread from the bakery.

19. My periods are being kind of weird at the moment - I’m pretty sure my cycle is changing, so I haven’t had a period in 2019 yet. I’m doing a rolling stock check of my stuff and am slowly donating things that I don’t use, and giving up some of the excess plastic bags. I managed to convince the market stall not to give me any plastic the other weekend.

20. Haven’t really done any big romantic gestures yet this month. We’re not really Valentine’s Day people, so that’s probably a no. I’m up way too late and was going to pack him a lunch to take in the morning tomorrow... Might have to save it for another day. I pushed him on a giant swing for a bit today :)

21. I’m working on the HTML/CSS/Javascript side-thing, and also the OCA Java certification. Robert, Ryan and I want to take a hackathon back to our sixth form over the summer, and planning a big event like that would be amazing experience.

22. I’m still messy, but the flat’s vaguely acceptable at the moment because we had an inspection in the week. I need to work on maintaining this level or better.