#i need the shirt the soundgarden guy is wearing so bad but on closer look i need his whole fit

[crookedvultures]

"I came in for U2, I came out with De La Soul" / "I came in for De La Soul, I came out with Soundgarden" (1989)

[grungeandrockoneshots]

Can you write something were reader is good friends with guys of soundgarden. And they see her as super badass and all but at One point Chris finds out that reader is self harming (or was about to do that) and he comforts her anfd fluff? I've been so triggered the last days and I just need some comfort..

„Hey boys! You’re looking in the wrong direction!“ youscreamed through the airport hall as soon as you noticed your four friends.They were standing with their backs turned to you, so they had no chance to seeyou approaching them. After hearing your voice, they all turned around and ranto you with the biggest smiles on their faces.

„Y/N! Finally!“ Chris enthusiastically exclaimed and theyall locked you in a group hug. Chris, Ben, Matt and Kim were friends who weremore like your family. You first met them at high school during one detentionclass, because all of you had some kind of rebellious attitude and liked tobreak all the rules back then. You soon got very close to each other andstarted doing the rogueries together. As time went by, the guys set up a bandwhich has become very successful not only in America but all over the world andyou had no choice but to accept the cruel fact of constantly being cut off fromthem because of their touring. Many things have changed during this time, butmostly you. You’ve grown up and quit your high school manners. That’s why youwere surprised the guys still saw that rebel soul in you after all this time.Right now you were going through some tough stuff in your life, your family hasbecome very distant and strange and moreover you were still dealing with abreak up you were forced to go through several months ago. Needless to say thatthe guys lifted your mood up a lot when they called you and told you they hadbooked you a plane ticket to New York to see them. You really hoped you’d cometo different thoughts with them.

„You missed me, right? I know you did!“ you smiled at them.

„Well…I don’t know, did you guys?“ Kim said jokingly andturned to the boys.

„Funny,“ you rolled your eyes with laughter, „but thanks forgetting me here, I’m so excited!“ You got out of the airport hall together andwaited for the taxi to pick you up. The sun was just at its highest and becauseit was the beginning of August, you all found it almost impossible to standanywhere where you were not protected by a shadow. The heat was terrible tohandle, plus when you were wearing a long-sleeved shirt. You needed to keepyour body covered at all costs.

„You should win some award for wearing this in thisdisgusting weather,“ Matt pointed to your shirt, „but I get it, yeah, you lookpretty cool and looking cool is important in a big city, right?“

„Exactly, Matt,“ you winked at him, but looking cool was inreality the last thing you wanted. No, there were different reasons. Reasonsyou prayed they would never find out. When the taxi finally arrived, youhappily got in and let the driver get you to the boys‘ hotel. You’ve never beento New York before, so you watched the city through the car windows totallyamazed. You were nervously playing with your hands, because all of this wasjust something new to you. You couldn’t stop thinking about everything and eventhough you tried so hard, your thoughts were still flying back to your hometownwhere so many bad things had happened recently. You even misheard the boys fewtimes when they spoke to you and you weren’t paying attention to them.Fortunately, after half an hour or so you stood in front of a huge and fancy hotelin which your friends were staying. They helped you with your luggage and ledyou to your room. What made you really anxious was a small conversation Ben andKim had on the way to your room which slowly grew into your biggest fear.

„If this heat continues to burn me down alive one more day,I swear I’m leaving the band and I’m moving to the polar bears forever. ThankGod for our swimming pool, I can’t wait to jump in,“ Ben muttered.

„Yeah, man, I’ll join you. All of us should go, it’s gonnabe fun! Y/N, remember how you stood underwater for more than a minute once? Youshould do two minutes today,“ Kim smiled, but you didn’t feel like smiling atall.

„Ah, no. I…I’m quite tired after the flight, you know? Ithink I’ll unpack my bags and take a little walk around,“ you said and tried toput tiredness to your voice.

„No, you can’t do this to us, Y/N! Ten minutes, please!“

„Sorry, I don’t feel like going now, Kim. Have fun, though,“you sent them a quick smile and disappeared behind the door. You breathed outas soon as you were certain you were all alone. You threw your luggage somewhereto the bed, went to the window and watched the life outside with eyes slowlyfilling up with tears. You were supposed to be happy here, to forget about thepain you’ve been going through and not to lie to your best friends and hurtthem like this. Another day and you disappointed people around you again. Youwere trapped in a circle with no way out.

Few moments later you heard a knock on the door. You quicklywiped the salt water off your cheeks, cleared your throat and exclaimed: „Yes?“It was Chris and his appearance made you smile a little.

„Do you have a minute?“ he asked and you nodded your head.

„Always for you,“ you said. He was sitting down on the bedwhen you suddenly remembered you actually had a little present for him. „Wait,I have something for you, just let me find it.“ You dived your hand into yourbag and after a while you found a bracelet you had bought him. It was from afestival you wanted to go to together, but the Soundgarden tour crossed hisplans and so you had to go alone. „I know how much you wanted to be there, sothis is the smallest and most absurd thing I could do for you,“ you took hishand and wrapped the bracelet around his wrist.

„Y/N,“ he smiled really widely, „thank you so much, but youknow you didn’t have to. You’re amazing.“ He didn’t let go of your hand and fora moment you felt a strong wave of joy flowing through your body. It lasteduntil his smile faded away. „And that’s the thing, you know? You’re so amazing,that I absolutely don’t get why…why this?“ he softly moved his thumb up yourwrist where he clearly felt your damaged skin. He sat a bit closer to you andtook your other hand in his. „Why? What happened that made you do this?“ hewhispered with tears in his eyes. You could barely stop your own now.

„I don’t know, Chris…there are just too many things I wasn’table to handle…and everything I do is bad, every single thing I do. I keep disappointingpeople I love all the time and then we end up becoming strangers. It’s the same every time, I‘ve lost myboyfriend, mum, dad, sister and…what if you’re the next one? I’m so tired ofbeing alone, but when someone wants to get closer, I push them away. Peoplelike me don’t deserve anything good, Chris, people like me only deserve to payfor what they’ve done. I…I don’t know what to do anymore,“ you sobbed so hardthat your whole body was shaking. You didn’t want anyone to know about thisside of you, but maybe you needed to get it out of yourself.

„Y/N, sweetheart, stop crying, please,“ Chris took your facein his hands and started wiping off all the tears, „I want you to listen to me.Are you listening to me? Okay. There’s no way in which you couldever disappoint me. What do you even mean by it? I know you for so long, for sofucking long and I’m telling you that you’re the most loving, caring and humbleperson I’ve met, you deserve the whole world. Nothing is worth your pain. Oh God,I have no idea what you had to go through when I wasn’t with you. I should havenoticed something earlier, I’m so sorry I wasn’t there when you needed me the most.“

„N-no no no, don’t ever dare to blame yourself, everything’smy fault, I did it and no one else is responsible for it,“ you cried your heartout. „I didn’t mean to hurt you, Chris, I really didn’t. I’ll understand if youdon’t want to see me anymore, because if I were you, I wouldn’t have wanted tosee me, too.“

„What are you talking about? You have no idea how much I careabout you, do you really think I would be able to leave you? Y/N, please, trustme,“ he pulled you closer and started giving you soft forehead kisses while youfirmly held his shirt in your fingers. You closed your eyes and let him comfortyou, but your eyes still producted the unwanted tears. Chris persistentlycleansed your face and once you realized his lips left your forehead, you feltthem placed on yours. Chris gave you slow and gentle kiss which you wishedwould never stop. He was the only hope. The only light.

„Do you trust me?“ he repeated when he pulled away. Younodded. „And do you know there’s a much better life waiting for you? I’ll makethe pain go away, just say you’ll be mine,“ he smiled a little.

„I will,“ you finally managed to smile as well and then youkissed Chris again with complete belief in his words.

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I’m sorry it took so long, but I hope you’re okay now and if not, this oneshot may help you a bit!♥