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lemonthepotato · 7 months

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“Re reading” Higurashi

(Spoilers, also minor spoilers for Danganronpa UDG.)

The title is a bit of a liars work. You see, I’ve been deceiving you all this whole time. Because despite the fact that my account is heavily focused on Higurashi memes and commentary, I’ve never actually read Higurashi. Oh, I saw the anime. Since 2018, I’ve been obsessed with Higurashi. Well, except 2020. I had a short hiatus from the fandom. But in 2022 I decided to begin actually reading the visual novel. I began reading Umineko in 2021 and finished it in 2022. I began reading Higurashi early 2022 and finished it in 23.

Join me and my horrible memory as I get many details wrong.

Chapter 1:

• I don’t remember anything from the damn project, but the suspect list seems off. XXXX, XXX, XXXX, XXXXX and XXXX. The main offender is XXXX. I don’t quite remember much, so I’ll go without making assumptions. I don’t remember if Takano was involved in the dam project. (This aged terribly. I don’t know why I thought this.) I think the sonozakis has something to do with it. I don’t know. We can rule out Keiichi and Rena, and Rika and Satoko because of their ages/locations. We can also rule out Mion and Shion due to their ages. Miyo fits XXXX, the main perpetrator, but again, I don’t remember that being the case. I remember Takano was involved with some government bullshit. I watched Higurashi in 2018 and only got back into the fandom recently. (I lost interest briefly in 2020 and got back into it in 2021) I finished Umi, and I’ve only started the VN. I don’t remember everything about the story, and I didn’t care much about the dam project.

• Things are brought up in these games without much relevance. Umineko had the whole lotta shit that didn’t add up to much, like the shit with Virgilia and the vase.

• Teppei? Hojo has four letters. That makes sense, but didn’t Teppei not live in Hinamizawa?) I don’t remember, again, only recently got back in.

I’m abandoning this format

The reason why I only began reading Higurashi a few months ago was because I was under the mindset of “well, I watched the anime, so reading the VN would basically be the same as a rewatch.” I never rewatch shows. The only anime I’ve ever rewatched was Erased, and I don’t even remember why, because I didn’t even care for it much. However, as I’ve spent the last five months trying to get through CH1 (I am a very slow reader, I got busy.) I have realised it is a very different experience from the anime. First of all, I haven’t watched the anime since 2018. So my memory might be a bit bad, but there are a couple details that I already find intriguing. First of all, the literary world offers Ryukishi a lot more options than any other form of media. As a writer myself, viewing a story written as “a show, but in words” is dishonest. Writing is, in a lot of ways, a superior art form to cinema in some regards, and it falls inferior in other places, as all media do. For example, you might not be able to convey facial expressions as detailed as you can in television. But you can convey small details and explain why those details are there. For example, in CH1, there was a scene where Keiichi remarks about how Rika must be struggling with her dance. Considering I’m familiar with the twist about Rika, that I believe occurs in CH4 in the VN, it re-contextualises that scene. It makes you wonder if she was really struggling, or if she was worried about the festival considering that’s where things hit the fan. Second, Rika loses to Tomitake, making me wonder if she’s trying different variables, trying to roll the dice in the most minuscule ways, desperate for a change. There is also the whole ‘infirmary, rika, poison’ thing that straight up spoils who the culprit is. Of course, I don’t believe Takano is revealed to be a nurse at this point.

I like how Ooishi brings up Mion and Rika potentially being behind Tomitakes death and Keiichi is like “WHAT?! MION WOULNT DO THAT” like bro what about Rika.

Foreshadowing the fingernail scene TwT

I’m curious what the conversation Rena and Mion are having. I don’t remember it being in the anime? So, the obvious intention is to omit certain words to make Rena and Mion look suspicious. This is something that can easily happened. You ever overhear something that sounds suspicious, but then you listen closer and realise it’s two women talking about getting ice cream, not saying ‘he didn’t scream’? Me neither. Point is that I’m wondering what they actually said. Maybe they were talking about a person, because Mion says she doesn’t want to talk about it. Maybe Satoshi? He was a member of the club, if I recall correctly. I wonder when Keiichi will get the bat. I don’t think Shion shows up this chapter, but I hope she gets fleshed out more in the VN. In the anime, I feel like she didn’t get much attention even in the original 2006 anime. And everyone who saw the anime just saw her as the “much blood. such murder.” girl. I don’t remember why she killed in the original arcs. Because she was trying to figure out who was responsible for Satoshi’s disappearance? He DID go missing, right? For ages, I always thought it was a mystery in the fandom what happened to him, but I feel that was a Mandela effect I created in my head. I mean I always just considered Outbreak non canon so it didn’t phase me when he showed up non-chalantly. But him being in a coma? Not what I remembered. All I remember from Shion’s arc was that she realised she had broken her promise to Satoshi at the end. Again, I’ve heard that out of every arc, Watanagashi was adapted the worst in the anime.

Onikakushi-hen is basically just a prank gone wrong, lmao. “MARKER PRANK, GONE WRONG!!!1!1!1” though I’m only at the morning scene where Keiichi discovers the bean paste and he starts overanalysing what in reality, was probably not a needle. I don’t know, because it’s been a while, but I’d suspect maybe a different sauce? Or something like candy?

I feel like Umineko’s creation may have been due to the success of the first Higurashi arc. Because the illusion side of things is really thorough here. A lot of things Rena and Mion say are completely normal. The only unusual thing would be Rena’s “LIAR” speech, which could’ve been her joking around, or in Keiichi’s head. Mion 100% probably did tease Keiichi about the diner, and when she said he needed to rest, it was probably with a ton of concern. Anyway, everything in Onikakushi is Ooishi’s fault lmao.

I remember Keiichi being a lot more aggressive in the anime. That’s probably me misremembering. The ‘horror’ in the anime feels a little different from the ‘horror’ in the visual novel. It feels more slow, more of a build up, though the whiplash can get a bit grading sometimes.

OK theory time. I’m not sure if this is how it happened, but I think Mion might’ve decided to prank Keiichi to cheer him up. So she got her classmates to follow Keiichi around (the car was probably not a coincidence though: I think it’s related to whatever that stuff with Tokyo and Takano was? I was too young to understand it back when I watched.) and she got the information somehow that Keiichi was buying or eating a flavor of noodles. She got Rena to make him dinner to cheer him up, or Rena did it on her own, and she relayed the information to him of what flavour he was eating, because she knew he was lying. Rena was probably sad that Keiichi was lying, but not aggressive. Whether or not the ‘usoda’ scene the first time was real or not is more debatable, as being pushed for details of your missing friend can push someone over the edge, but I think Keiichi could be been imagining that too. And as we all know, the ‘marker’ thing is coming soon.

‘Why would Rena go this far in pranking Keiichi with Mion’ well, remember two facts. Rena is already very mentally unstable due to her Dad’s inferred abuse and Rina. I don’t remember if Rena’s dad being abusive is in the original, but reading Gou again I notice it’s a detail added. Another factor is age: Rena is 13. 13 year olds don’t understand the limit to jokes that often. And with Mion being 14 (the demon year), she probably doesn’t know the limit either. The age of Higurashi characters amazes me. When I was young and watching the anime I thought Rena was 15, Mion was 16, Shion was 16-18, Keiichi was 16, and Rika and Satoko were 12-14. I just saw them as older. And to be honest, Rena seems older than 13.

Okay, see? Rena even admits she was messing around. She didn’t realise how paranoid Keiichi was. Her poor fingers… wait until the nail scene XD.

Keiichi, a lack of sleep increases paranoia. *sigh* also that line about how no one can decide except him if today would be- yeah. Rings different if you know the ending.

ITS TABASCO. Keiichi, If you weren’t such a paranoid, ableist and judgmental person you could’ve just talked to Mion and Rena. It’s incredibly disrespectful to dig through your friends pasts and not even talk to them, and disrespect their traumas. But still. Saikoroshi-hen is so good though, unrelated. Still unbelievable that Saikoroshi was in the same show as Hajisarashi and Hirukowashi, the latter that has a grown woman gushing over Rena.

CH2

Okay, time to figure out who is Mion and who is Shion. For the diner scene, I think it might be Mion, but I don’t know- I don’t remember. The way she is acting would make sense if it was Mion, because she wouldn’t want Keiichi to see her like that. Okay, the next ‘Shion’ scene I also believe to be Mion because she literally calls him ‘Kei-chan’ and blushes around him.

The bike scene. I’m not sure, but I’m leaning towards Shion. First of all, calling him Kei-chan is suspicious, so that’s a reason why it could be Mion. But at the same time, she hasn’t blushed around Keiichi, and if I recall, Mion’s gotten in trouble with the law before, even swearing out Ooishi in CH1, so why would she be so respectful to law enforcement? Wait… she’s blushing… hmmmm. Mion? The phone scene I think could be Shion, but it’s hard to tell. I feel like it’s Shion in the restaurant, cuz she’s acting less… you know, nervous?

Poor Shion. Keiichi really is subtly sexist. He even downplays the very real nature of what that man’s doing to Shion, it’s harassment. This makes the Satoshi and Keiichi scene from Kira or whatever much more deserved. Ugh.

Wonder if St. Lucia is part of the reason Shion (assuming it’s her) feels like this situation is her fault. St. Lucia basically puts a lot of expectation on the individual, and failing that system is a kind of personal responsibility. Mixed with growing up in a misogynistic world, it’s no wonder Shion is victim blaming herself. Also her shitty family.

“No means no.” Thank you Rena very based. Also I like how the first thing Rena does when seeing Shion is gush over how kyute she is. Shiirena confirmed???! /j (?)

Why is the tense changing. All the time. Ryukishi, it’s one or the other. I personally use past tense when writing, as it is a lot more… I don’t know, easy? Ryukishi also wasn’t really good at foreshadowing back then. Shion looking like she has demon blood. Really? Maybe it’s just because I know the twist about it.

I have a feeling Mion isn’t Mion.

Shion is definitely not crying on the other end of the line. She’s telling Keiichi to calm down, but I don’t think she herself is calm. Considering she heard those noises at the night of Watanagashi, she probably had Hinamizawa Syndrome. How Hinamizawa Syndrome develops is unknown. I don’t remember. I do remember there is a drug, H137 or something, that induces it, that Takano uses on Tomitake, but did she use it on Keiichi and now Shion, or did it naturally develop? It could be either. She encountered Keiichi, albeit in a public setting, so for Onikakushi it’s more likely he developed it on his own. But Shion, alone in that storehouse with Keiichi? Maybe. But then again, I doubt it. Also this music is hilarious.

See, I knew the “hic” shit was building up to a laugh. Now, the real question - is it one of sadism and deceit, or panic and frantic thinking, I don’t remember how Hinamizawa Syndrome affects people, and their logical state of mind. I feel like the anime might have doubled down on the “crazy” aspect too much, without delving into the psychology. Shion, as a person, isn’t evil. She expresses remorse for her actions, I believe, in later arcs. That’s why I’m curious on why she did it.

I have a lot of thoughts about the nail scene. So, obviously Mion is Shion and Shion is Mion. A fact about the Sonozaki’ sis that Mion was born Shion and Shion was born Mion, and they switched names at one point. To make things a little less confusing, I’ll refer to Mion (the one with the demon tattoo) as Mion, and Shion as Shion, not by their birth names, by their chosen names. Here’s my theory. Shion had long been resentful of Mion, because she was given special treatment by the other members of the family. Shion snuck into the storehouse, and Shion was punished for it by Mion. Shion already had signs of Hinamizawa Syndrome, so she was growing even more resentful. I believe, well, know, Shion didn’t kill Tomitake & Takino, yet, Shion, afflicted with HS, was scared that she had been cursed and was after next. Then, she began interrogating her family (which I remember from the anime) and none of them confessed, which she then passed the blame to Satoko, and it spiralled out of control. When Rena and Keiichi come over, and Mion is locked up, I can guess Shion’s thoughts during this. The ‘demon/oni’ in this context is Shion pretending to be Mion, and disgracing the name of ‘Mion’. The title of ‘Mion’ and ‘Shion’ are again, titles to them. Because Shion in reality, if I recall, is actually the older sister of the two, she probably wanted to take the name ‘Mion’ back. As to why she let Keiichi go, I don’t know. Maybe I’m remembering poorly, but I remember the anime cutting out Shion letting Keiichi go, and it cuts before she is about to do the nail stuff. But I could be misremembering. I don’t have many theories thus far. Why could giving the doll to ‘Mion’ (who I’m in the middle on being Shion) be such a big deal? Mion wanted the doll because she wanted to be treated as a girl, Shion wanted the doll because… it doesn’t make sense. I really don’t remember the ‘why’ of this arc, just the how. We all remember the infamous Satoko scene, after all. (Revisiting this while reading arc 6, after reading arc 5. I was surprisingly close to the truth, still.)

Wait, didn’t Shion push Mion down a well in the anime? Am I misremembering or was it just changed in the adaptation? No, that wouldn’t make sense. Takano being dead doesn’t make sense. She is a nurse, so? Maybe she constructed her own demise and framed it to look older? Maybe she got a wax figure XDDD? Maybe it’s someone who looks like her. Or maybe Keiichi has Hinamizawa Syndrome. No, Takano was alive. Whoever that was they found wasn’t her. Jirou, Keiichi and Shion all having Hinamizawa syndrome is possible but I doubt Keiichi’s would have progressed that far due to him not hearing noises.

Hints of Rika’s “juice”-addiction, Satoko’s abuse, both foreshadowed in a slice of life meta scene. Weird. Takano standing RIGHT NEXT TO Mion while she says there’s a mystery culprit, huh, Ryukishi do you think you’re funny. Do you think you’re a fucking comedian. Because yes.

‘Sayoko’. I didn’t know Satoko had a twin. Let’s see… is Sayoko a name? Oh, it is. It means ‘small child.’ I didn’t know Satoko had a twin. That explains a lot. Not really. It explains nothing. Is it a translation error? No, obviously not. This is clever foreshadowing to the show that shant be named and the manga adaptation midguri. (Edit as I’m approaching CH7: I forgot to mention but I like meguri slightly more than Sotsu. Both are still lacking but still.)

CH3

Keiichi has the ego of a brick. Don’t read into that metaphor. His “plan” for saving Satoko is a felony. He doesn’t even seem to care if Satoko would be happy living with him. And he was willing to give her to Irie. That says enough. (Edit as I’m approaching CH7: Come to think of it, maybe I actually was too harsh on Keiichi. If a child is being abused, you get them out of that situation point blank period. So I don’t know.)

Why didn’t… why didn’t Keiichi have cat eyes in Onikakushi-hen? He had HS too, in that arc, but no one commented on it. Now they are. Weird… idk why though.

Ugh. Keiichi. They’re clearly covering for you. Why would they not find Teppei? Because they moved him! But because Keiichi developed HS, he’s making crazy assumptions. He’s probably missing obvious social cues that his friends are trying to tell him ‘hey, we helped’ without outright saying it. Satoko was probably actually crying, somewhat bittersweet I’d imagine. The trauma is still there, but because it’s a change of routine, she isn’t able to process it fully yet. I’m sure she is happy her uncle isn’t bothering her, but she’s confused by it.

Wait, is this the arc where… okay, if I remember, Satoko is attempting uhhh… well she’s in a bathtub and it’s like, overheating? Or she’s like? You knowing with something? But I believe Satoko has HS in every arc to a minor degree, so… she does to Keiichi what she did to her parents? I don’t know.

“...If that was the case, then here's how it would end up. ...I was actually in a vegetative state due to a traffic accident, and I was currently dreaming in a hospital bed...” jeez K1 because that’s NEVER happened in ANY arc to ANYONE. Sarcasm.

This isn’t adding up. If Satoko had to count to 10,000, it takes 2 hours to count to 10,000. So she couldn’t have been in there that long. This could either be K1 hallucinating, or Kei-chan isn’t and Ryukishi was just. Not thinking about it. Now, if Satoko was counting by the minute, that would be almost exactly a week. (Edit: 2 hours is way too long to be in a hot bathtub. What was I thinking?)

Ah, I see. Satoko released an eruption so large when she pushed Keiichi that it affected the whole village. Nah, I’m pretty sure the mountain dogs have something to do with this. From Tokyo? Something something Takano something something grandfathers research. I don’t remember.

CH4

Yukie ain’t there, son. I bet. She probably wasn’t when giving birth, something happened likely. Maybe if you were there for her she wouldn’t have went alone but you know. L Alabama. AKASAKA. Not alamaba. Whatever.

So, I thought Rika or Takano could be behind the mysterious TIPS, so now we have confirmation that it was Rika. If this is because of the loops, then that means that Rika has been looping for longer periods of time than I suspected. I always thought she was reliving the same few days in Hinamizawa, but was she transported a few years back this time? Was Rika like this before she became a looper? Who knows.

CH5

Shion is just like me fr fr. I fully understand the mindset of “if I wasn’t born, I wouldn’t have had to suffer.” It’s the very reason I don’t want kids. I feel like life is just a game of suffer vs sufferer. Everyone is either a sufferer or the perpetrator, or a standerby, which is no better than the perpetrator. “Why was I born? Why did this world give birth to me? I shouldn't have been born. I wouldn't have had to suffer if I hadn't been. What was the meaning of my meaningless life?”

“Where did I go wrong...? When in my life did I make the wrong choice?”

*sigh* my mom made the wrong choice in having me. I was better off never existing at all.

“I’m sorry for being born” you’re not crying, I am. I mean, I’m not crying- fuck.

Sorry, opinions were mixed? Teppei is a legit horrendous person. Keiichi did nothing wrong. Does anyone know the Blanchard case? That poor, poor girl was horrifically abused, and got sent to jail because she retaliated against the abuse. Horrific. How could anyone care about a human who abuses a child? WHO? No, no.

So I’m realising from Arc 3, re-reading my notes, my point about Satoko counting to 10,000 is ridiculous because she was in either really hot or really cold water, which can take as short as 5 minutes. Fuck Teppei.

CH6

Rena’s mom and dad seem like bad people. Your child shouldn’t be responsible for cooking, fathers should know how to cook, clean, and look after their kids. Also, Rena’s mother reminds me of that case where a mother spoiled her child and then… killed that child and herself. But yeah, I know this is some deep literary anoysis, and no one else figured this out, but I think Rena’s mom may be getting a divorce 😨 I know, shocking. /s

My eyes are a bit wet because what Rena describes happened to me in my childhood, sort of. My mom and dad got into a really big fight, and me and my mom left and got into the car, and she started crying, and I started crying. I don’t like my mom, but what did my dad say that made me and my mom too scared to be near him?! I don’t know. I hate both of them.

“I know you're not naïve

But you ignore it all

Just look, you've been deceived

I don't forgive you either”

“Completely depending on someone means trying to earn even deeper sympathy from them. At that point, even though you're trying to comfort them. they just slip further and further into depression. By finding initial success through relying on someone and receiving comfort, they grow addicted to indulging in misfortune. That's a golden rule for psychologists, did you know? Mental trauma can only be be healed by the person who has it. If someone else helps a person out of their mental trauma. even if they succeeded that person wouldn't be completely healed. Kei-chan, people feel better just by talking to somebody. Sometimes, all they need is someone who does nothing but listen quietly.” Wow did Ryukishi just talk directly to me,?? Read my mind??

Also, hmm, Mion is strangely knowledgable about mental health. It’s a shame Mion never gets her own arc. And no, Wataakashi-hen does not count. I thoroughly hate Gou and Sotsu, but find Meguri… acceptable. I know not a lot of people like Meguri, and frankly I still hate Tatariakashi-hen. Some love to defend it, I don’t. And that’s all I’ll say.

I do find Rena hypocritical. She criticises her friends for not helping Satoshi, but then berates Keiichi in arc 3 for criticising them for not helping Satoko? Tbf, Keiichi was being a dick, but it seems… very parallel. I don’t think this is unintentional. Hinamizawa Syndrome, and this is surprising, may lead to a higher risk of stress. Crazy, right? They might begin blaming those around them. Crazy?

Couldn’t have seen that coming.

Mion must’ve felt really invalidated when Keiichi said “Are you kidding me? That's not why I called you here. I have to talk to you about something very important. I want you to listen without making fun of me,” in response to "Oh. I know. You want to give me a love letter, don't you? People usually use the shoe locker for that, you know?”

Like he already led her on by saying “We don't really do that in the city. A lot of guys hand over their love letters in person.” I mean yes, it wasn’t fully his fault- like he didn’t know. But damn. Poor Mion. Seriously. :((

I could only get “start.”

Rena stop looking at r/conspiracy and r/gangstalking. Sound familiar? Yeah I just posted this.

Finally, the brick line.

“No matter what happened in the past, as long as you're a great person at present, you shouldn't be embarrassed of yourself. Am I wrong? What's the purpose of living if we can never earn redemption?" I know this is a general statement but it’s funny in the context of. Like. Imagine killing like 50 people and then saying “hey it’s all in the past my guy.” LMAO.

Uhhh Rika I don’t think you can forgive a crime committed against Rena and Mion. Lmaooo

Bruh when Satoko said “Keiichi fought for me? I find that hard to believe” I laughed. She doubts Keiichi so hard 💀

"Very well we'll accept the second condition. But let us add another condition on top of that. We're going to send her a lawyer. You will only question her in the lawyers presence.” I want to see Saul Goodman defending Rena Ryuugu now. I will pay money for it. Unironically? Never speak to police without a lawyer present.

Yes, Rena was aware of her actions. To a degree. But does she deserve jail time? I don’t think so, but she clearly has some mental problems that need treated. I think Ooishi should be discharged from the police force for even entertaining her delusions. He was really mainly at fault. Even during negotiation. He couldn’t have done much else, but still. Was not helping.

FILE NO 34. Huh. This must’ve been obvious for the Japanese audience HAHA. So, the kanji for Miyo is the same kanji for san and shi, right? 3 and 4? Pffttttt. Okay, to be fair, names can be written in a variety of ways In Japanese. But still. Funny.

Oh never mind then it was meant to be obvious. It doesn’t actually give away the fact she’s the culprit I just jumped the gun

WOW HM ITS ALMOST LIKE THERE IS NO CULT AND TAKANO IS PLAYING YOU ALL FOR FOOLS.

“People who think it’s useless to talk to others usually haven’t really talked to others.” Eh, disagree. I used to. It never helped. No one else can solve my problems. No one cares about me. I only have one human looking out for me, and that is myself.

CH7

Oh, are we going to see Hanyuu Furude this arc? Yay, I love Hanyuu. She’s so cute. I wonder why Rika is referring to her as a brother or sister. Is this a flashback? Hanyuu is Rika’s great x8 grandmother or something, right? She’s also the village god I think.

Anyway, Akarigurashi chapter 8.2 just released and I liked it. Sorry, unrelated. Sorry, I like meguri, okay?

“So yes, if this piece, Ooishi, didn't intervene, then perhaps the victims of Rule X wouldn't have resorted to such violence.” I TOLD YOU. I TOLD you Ooishi was at fault all along.

“And well, while people in a single world may be able to reach such an idea, the widespread desire to place blame commonly causes A to be lynched by society while the environment that gave rise to A goes ignored.” Yeah, this is actually true for real life. Crimes happen. A “monster” committed them out of “evil.” The root of evil is never addressed. Human nature is never addressed, because it’s a “monster.” No one else feels responsible. In reality? It’s all of our faults. Letting the world be in shambles is every humans collective fault. That’s my perspective.

“She also may have to defeat Rule Z, just as Sonozokai Shion faced it in Meakashi.” Who is Sonozokai Shion? Crazy, first we had Sayoko and now we have Shion Sonozokai.

Hey, thanks Ryukishi. It’s awesome to hear Rule X, Rule Y and Rule Z being mentioned constantly even though I can’t remember off the top of my head the differences! Okay, Rule X is that the disease always makes one of Rika’s friends develop Hinamizawa Syndrome. Rule Y is that Rika Furude, Takano Miyo and Jirou Tomitake always die. Rule Z is that Ooishi and Takano always cause shit. Right?

So how long has Rika been looping? 100 years? How many time loops, then? If she looped the same June of 1983, and only the current arcs were what she experienced, that would be six months! But then, why does she say Rena, Shion and Keiichi lost it? Why is it never Mion or Satoko? Is that just a rule for all arcs, or because she only experienced these six arcs? And if she experienced her whole life six times, that’s 60 years. So, I’m going with the idea that there were either 4 previous loops, or… if she’s only experiencing one month, and June of 1983 had 30 days, then to make 1 month add up to 100 years, she would’ve experienced… 3000 loops? Is that correct? Yeah… if I had to loop the same month 3000 times, I would become a little jaded too.

Okay I might’ve overestimated, it’s around 1200. Still a lot.

I would love a Sotsu/Meguri style visual novel. Maybe a fan project? But it wouldn’t have the same charm as an official one. I truly believe after reading Umineko and almost finishing Higurashi that these stories can only truly be understood through the visual novel medium. Ciconia though? Uh… sorry, I’m not paying £40 for ONE chapter of a story. If that pattern continues, phase 2, 3 and 4 being released will add up to £160. I am not paying £160 for fucking Ciconia. I think the worst part is that no playthroughs are allowed past a certain chapter, 7 or 8. I understand why. But like- if the game wasn’t £40 I would understand more. I mean come on. It’s one chapter. Like Ryukishi, my guy, are you struggling financially or smth? Because we alllll are. Some of us, such as myself, don’t even have income because the job market is unbelievable! So the only money I can get right now is money from people on holidays. And at this rate, I don’t think phase 2 is gonna be released anytime soon so… oopsies. Yeah no. I’ll pass. Oh wait? It’s actually £30, and on sale for £20 right now. Tempting, very tempting, but ah! I can’t justify it right now. Sorry, but it’s on principle alone I can’t justify that. The question arcs of Umineko are around £20. Someone said Ciconia Phase 1 is double the length of Lotgw. If that is true, and each question arc is worth £5 (same logic as the Higurashi arc pricing, also it makes sense considering the price) then that should only be £10. It’s basic Math. But instead it’s being charged at £30. I would pay £10 for each phase. Not £30, not even £20. Sorry, but I believe in fairness. And no one can convince me £30 or 40 USD is a reasonable price for one phase of a four phase story. This is the sims 4 levels of bad. Okay, maybe not exactly that bad… but look. Huniepop 2 is £20 and honestly even that probably has more worth than Ciconia.

“The art is better” yeah? art is meant to improve over time. Why does that matter? Like come on, don’t act like the game is Mona Lisa levels of good.

Rika this has a very simple solution. In each arc, have Hanyuu follow everyone around one by one. Follow Keiichi. Suspicious behaviour? No? Follow Satoko. Suspicious behaviour? No? Follow… and follow… then follow Ooishi. No? Then follow Mion? No? Then follow Takano, and that’s where the money is. God, Rika, you’re pathetic. I could’ve figured this out ages ago.

Mandela, I remember her being very optimistic in the anime. Hanyuu, that is. I didn’t realise she was this negative. That’s a weird thing to misremember. Also I’ve been subconsciously trying to figure out the MBTI of every Higurashi character this entire time, and I think I have it down. Let’s start with Keiichi… my memory is very bad, but in none of the arcs I don’t remember him being very ne or ni dom… a… si dom? No… se? Maybe… he seems like fi-dom maybe??? It’s not that he doesn’t care about other peoples feelings it’s just that he’s kinda insensitive and clearly thinks of his own subconsciously. So… hmm… ESFP?? No wait, I just completely forgot Ti/Te existed! Uhh… That feels wrong… Rika is a clear ni-dom with heavy… I don’t know??? I can’t be arsed actually. Okay, actually…

Keiichi isn’t logic driven. I mean, Onikakushi and Tsumihoroboshi for example. It wasn’t until Mion educated him that he realised how silly he was being. Though I don’t know if I consider Mion more Tx or Fx. She has a lot of loyalty to her friends and the Sonozaki family, so I’m leaning Fx. But Fi or Fe? Well. I don’t know. Mion isn’t a Ne nor Ni dom, as showcased by her debunking Keiichi and Rena’s conspiracies. She doesn’t seem interested in “what ifs.” She doesn’t seem interested in thinking about abstract concepts very much. I don’t really understand how Se and Si users work, to be honest. I’m a very heavy and probably unhealthy ne-dom. I’m NeFi, ENFP. As far as I’m aware anyway… if you get different vibes from me because of this post, and want to suggest otherwise, please let me know. And yes, MBTI is pseudoscience, but it’s fun. So I really don’t care. Hell, you could call all of typology pseudoscience. You could call psych and sociology pseudoscience. But are you just going to dismiss entire fields of science as fake just because they aren’t scientific in the way you like? Pseudoscience consists of statements, beliefs, or practices that claim to be both scientific and factual but are incompatible with the scientific method. The scientific method is using empirical evidence to draw conclusions. Some things are just not provable. If I surveyed a town and everyone there said they liked curry, I could say that everyone in that town liked curry. (Chie watching me with a death glare right now) But, how could you truly know that they like curry? Even statistics can’t be reliable. What if everyone lied? It’s improbable, but not impossible. But do we dismiss sociology and psychology just because we can’t prove things beyond a shadow of a doubt? No. And typologies like MBTI are similar. Of course these are abstract labels. Of course there’s no way we can prove cognitive functions exist. And yes, there is probably many more “cognitive functions.” But MBTI is a framework of identity. Even Jung said he was probably mistaken. So why do we cling to it? To help us understand ourselves.

What was I talking about again? Oh, When They Cry

I want to see a Sotsu like story but Mion is the looper. Why? Because Mion has such a strong will and sense of responsibility, that I want to see her going through the loops. How would she react? Of course, a character like Rena looping was something I found interesting, but she’s already predisposed to insanity. Mion is the only relatively “normal” (as normal as a yakuza heir can be) one, so I would want to see that. The story could be… hmm… Imotokoroshi?? Look I was trying to find words that ended in shi because the visual novel tends to do that. But Mion and Shion are different people so it doesn’t always have to involve them both, I just couldn’t come up with a better title… ok this hypothetical is silly, moving on

A choice? Considering this is a linear visual novel, not that linear is a bad thing, I doubt this choice will affect anything, right? Also, unrelated, but Miirena or Shiirena? Like, which do y’all like more? Because I’m torn. They’re both different people but in Watanagashi and Meakashi-hen Rena thought Shion was Mion, so thus far there isn’t much Shiirena content to work off. There’s some for Miirena though. Ugh why am I bringing this up? We need more Shion content grrr. Every Higurashi girl has been my favourite at some point. I think Shion was my initial favourite?… then Rika, Then Rena, then Satoko. And now? Hm, I don’t know. To answer these kinds of questions, I ask myself, which character would I prefer over another in an arc? Well, okay, let’s go down the list. Who would I remove first? Honestly? Satoko or Rika. And it’s not that I don’t love them as characters, but I have to be honest. Then who? Maybe Rena? I’m just ignoring Keiichi’s existence btw. So Mion or Shion… I like them both a lot! I relate to Shion in a lot of ways but she’s also very immature tbh. So I don’t know. Maybe I’m going about this wrong… I always root for the underdog, probably why Satoko went from one of my favourites to “meh” when GouSotsu released. Yeah it’s not the best ideology. So I don’t know. Mion? You’re asking me to choose between my blorbos!! This isn’t fair!!

I would love a friend like Mion. If you are kin with mion, or synpath or anything, we should be friends! I bet you’re a mature, loyal person! So maybe we shouldn’t, because I’m the opposite. Well maturity wise anyway. I get treated like a kid anyway despite being an adult so I guess I’m not allowed to act like one anyway. Out of all the Higurashi main cast, I relate a lot to them all in different ways, except Mion. She’s just so grounded and logical. Okay, seriously though, does anyone actually have Satoshi as their favourite Higurashi character? Like… bruh. He ain’t even that interesting. Anyway, I think I relate most to Shion in her arc, which is concerning. I’m not as cunning as Shion. No, it’s not that I can’t hide my emotions, it’s that after suffering in silence for so long, I take every little piece of happiness and let it show. I let it show even when I know it’s not good for me, because what have I got to lose? When was the last time I was truly happy? Is happiness even possible? Anyway…

“All I'm saying is that dolls aren't for boys.” “I see.. Then I guess you can have it. Here.” Mion probably really needed to hear that.

I wonder what deadly vices the seven main characters would have. Rika, I feel would be sloth. Shion would be envy. That’s about all I’ve figured out…

So when Shion heard those footsteps, he was hearing Hanyuu maybe? She was infected with Hinamizawa Syndrome, much like Satoko has, so… maybe people with Hinamizawa Syndrome can hear Hanyuu. My big question is, what is Hanyuu doing following Shion around? Just to tell Rika about it?

Think about it kids. If Rika has looped 1200 times, that means the probability of Rena and… I’m torn on Shiirena or Miirena as ships so I’ll say either… getting gay married, is not impossible. The probability of Rika and Satoko getting gay married is also not impossible. Just remember that.

Irie isn’t a bad person? He literally simps after little children. Yes he’s a bad person. He wanted to adopt Satoko for his own sick purposes. Yeah, he supposedly also cared about her, but come on. This is one of the few criticisms I have with Ryukishi’s writing, the sexualisation of his characters. It’s a funny gag in anime. But it’s not actually very funny. I don’t know if Japan as a whole just doesn’t get bothered by these things and sense of humour, but anime culture certainly doesn’t. It’s just not funny, and I wish he would treat it with seriousness. Irie making jokes about children in maid uniforms, like Rena, is not funny, and that’s just dismissed entirely. At the very least, I don’t think Umineko has many jokes about Maria like that. I think they don’t anyway, but there might’ve been one in the earlier arcs.

Ryukishi, come on. Takano being the killer is so obvious at this point. Like it’s driving me insane. Rika, how did you never question this woman??

I changed my mind. Pride is Rika’s sin. There are plenty of reasons the re-incarnation of a village god could be killed. Maybe someone non-religious wants to make a statement, for example.

Didn’t Takano kill Rika’s mother, I remember seeing that in the manga? I haven’t read all of the manga but I own the first two volumes and I’ve read that part online somewhere.

“I went to a forest and got killed in July.” Ohk, so hide in Antarctica then. Then you’ll live until August, and then die of hypothermia.

Okay the implication here is wild. So, not only does Tomitake have Hinamizawa syndrome, that might mean Keiichi’s dad does too? Or maybe Hanyuu is just having more of a human like presence the more weak her powers get. I know for a fact in arc 8 she starts showing up around the others.

So, is this the arc where Satoko gets rescued from Teppei? Because well, it’s arc 7. So I have a little issue really caring when I know Takano will just kill Rika and it won’t matter. What was it Rika said in this arc in the anime? “Kill me slowly, so I remember the face of my enemy.” Or something… I haven’t watched the anime since 2018, but I remember that.

“Hanyuu is not with me twenty four hours a day. She sometimes falls asleep, and sometimes she goes out for walks. Though in her case, it's not a walk, but more like a stalk. She follows people around when she finds someone interesting, and she enjoys observing them.” Well that explains a lot.

Okay, this is a rant unrelated to arc 7. I think the main reason I prefer meguri over Sotsu, again, unrelated to anything here, is the one scene where Satoko snaps. In Sotsu, or the end of Gou? Don’t remember, Satoko says something along the lines of “all I have to do is break Rika,” after learning about the torment Rika went through. But in meguri, at first she is horrified, and THEN she finally accepts that she needs to cause a tragedy. Because think of it this way, if you were told your friend had time looping powers and looped over 100 years to find a happy ending, but you still end up miserable in the end, you probably would be horrified, but then you would try and change things. It’s not Satoko jumping into sadistic behaviour that I don’t see as possible, it’s the immediate jump. Though some of my dislike for Sotsu is probably the fact that when I was younger and watching Higurashi I related to Satoko, and I still do, and in Sotsu, I realised I was like her too in that already, and it kind of worried me. But I think what bothered me most was the ending of Sotsu. Call me a pussy, but I cried at the ending, because it was so lacklustre. I have never cried at an ending because it was so bad, EVER. Satoko destroyed the previous loops, however that works, got immediately forgiven and then a half assed Umi reference is made and roll credits. And for the record, I’m not saying Satoko can’t be forgiven, but I’m saying the line about “I will return Satoko Hojo” to you kinda annoys me because like- sorry I’m trying not to laugh, like genuinely, was witch satoko not a metaphor??? Much like how Rika becomes more jaded overtime, Satoko became more sadistic overtime and in her own way jaded. But in the end, all of her trauma and other issues is just, poof, fine, and they go their separate ways. But something I really hate about Sotsu is Tatariakashi. It really doesn’t matter what justification you come up with, because you aren’t thinking about the real world implications of Tatariakashi. Let’s look at this from a meta context. Satoko Hojo is a victim of abuse who wasn’t believed because of her past pattern of lying (which might not have even been lying, but just her young brain not fully comprehending things, as it is implied), even though she actually was being abused in 1983. However, tatariakashi has Satoko lie about her abuse, which feeds into the whole “oh, well you shouldn’t believe children victims of abuse in case they’re lying,” thing. I don’t care what excuse you come up with. This arc exists only for shock value, and has nothing more to say, in both Sotsu and Meguri, and I will stand by that. What does this arc say about child abuse? Nothing. Absolutely nothing other than the indirect effect this arc has. When your message isn’t intentional, you fucked up. And don’t just tell me I’m just misinterpreting it. That’s a lazy excuse. Do you know how many people also ‘misinterpreted’ this arc? Sorry, but if your story can be misinterpreted this badly by many people, maybe it isn’t our fault, maybe it’s just bad writing. Because it is bad writing. This arc is detested for a reason. Let’s make something clear: even if Satoko was lying in Tatariakashi, that doesn’t mean that the right choice was not believing her. You should believe victims. The implication here is that by believing Satoko, Rika couldn’t overcome the tragedy again. Do you fucking see the problem? When believing a victim of abuse indirectly leads to tragedy, you’re kind of promoting that it was the wrong thing to do. Like come on. I’m just using common sense here. This arc is offensive to victims of childhood trauma, and I say this as one. Sorry I got a little heated. I just don’t like being treated like I just don’t “get” Tatariakashi. I get it. I just think it’s disgusting. Moving onto CH7 again. Sorry.

“People can't live without hope. People can survive because they believe that something good will happen to them eventually, as long as they keep on living. I had nothing left to bet on. All I could do was get hurt and suffer devastation, Blood flowed from my broken heart and found its way out through my eyes in the form of tears.” Powerful words my friend, powerful words.

I remember that Shion was very angry in the anime over Satoko’s abuse, so I wonder how she’ll act in the VN.

Higurashi Abridged but the characters are going in a circle about calling. “Keiichi, I tried to ring you but you were busy.” “Wait Rena, I’m getting a call from Shion.” “Alright, I’ll call Mii-chan then.” “Keiichi, I tried calling Rena but she wouldn’t pick up.” “She’s calling Mi- wait I’m getting a call.” “I tried calling Rena but she didn’t pick up, have you tried?” “Mion- she’s trying to call you.” Okay, maybe my sense of humour is a bit broken but in my head this is the funniest thing ever. A bit tone deaf but idk. The brain works in weird methods. They just go in circles about it for like 5 minutes straight not even getting to the point.

Like okay, if I made an abridged series I would probably make a parody of GouSotsu. I would have Satoko become a looper, but when Rika got hit by the chandelier, the rest of the club in all other timelines became absolute dolts as a result of the “curse of the chandelier” or something. So in each arc, Satoko would try to cause a tragedy, but Hinamizawa Syndrome it affects them in ridiculous ways and they have weird motives. Satoko and Rika are the only straight men of the group… ironically. Rika figures out Satoko is the looper because she’s the only club member with a brain. Like come on that would be peak comedy. I’d eat that shit up as an abridged series. And the characters would have shit about them flipped. Rena wouldn’t be paranoid because of aliens, she would be paranoid because she is an alien and thinks the government is after her. Mion isn’t the heir to the Yakuza, she’s the heir to something really mundane like… a furniture shop, but she takes it super seriously. (Umineko joke here.) I don’t have many ideas for Shion because she’s already pretty unhinged. She’d just have a deep country accent and make meta commentary. Okay, I need to stop making up a story for a hypothetical abridged series I am not making. It was just a “what-if.”

My character tier list is tricky because I love them all, but who is THE blorbo? I like Satoko a lot, but I also like Mion, and I like Shion. Oddly, I think Rena is losing favour with me. Not that she’s a bad character, just not my favourite anymore. I could’ve easily said Satoko was the blorbo, before GouSotsu came out. Look, I just see villain Satoko and think “you could be written so much better.” As well as “she just like fr” but let’s ignore that. Satoko is a very high synpath for me, or even fictionhearted, but mmm. I don’t know. Satoko and Mion are the blorbos right now, but I love all of them. Also, I’ve been thinking, and I’ll probably play the bonus arcs and add them as a separate posts. When I did Umineko’s two bonus arcs, my drafts got deleted. For those curious, I knew Piece’s identity like 30-40 minutes in, but still. And the only commentary for the other one was the idea of intersex Sayo and I thought Kumasawa saying “this is going to be the best prank ever” funny.

Going to 2018 tradition of writing every Higu birthday, as I only got halfway down thenfirstday… what. That doesn’t word. That’s not a sentence. I don’t speak. Well.

'Satoko, you've been a good girl so I guess your cold is all better now. Go back to school tomorrow.” “Thank you so much. Thank you so much...” He was the one who told her to say 'thank you' when he gives her approval to do something. But it annoyed him to hear her say it over and over.

Ugh what an asshole. She’s so scared of him. And Oryou won’t help her because of her family name? Ugh I hate Oryou.

I’m not crying, you’re crying. It’s hard when you remember Satoko is literally a little girl who is severely traumatised. She’s only 11. I don’t know her fear exactly, but I know what it’s like to have scary figures in your life as a kid… even if my case was not as bad as Satoko’s. It was more emotional than physical on their behalf. I was never good enough for them. I told my therapist on accident once and she got concerned, I didn’t understand why. My dad got very mad at me for telling the therapist about what he did. It didn’t really click for me until 2020 that something was truly off about this. And I’ve been afraid to call it what it is. Even now I question if it was emotional abuse or if I was just overreacting. Abuse is such a strong word. When others have it worse, can I really say that? It’s not like I’ve been perfect either. I was a brat as a kid. But it still hurt. But some things I found out are normal. Being forced to do your homework while being yelled at for hours on end is apparently a common experience cuz I saw a Twitter thread of people saying they related. So what else I went through was normal? Was it all normal? Was it all okay? I hope it isn’t normal. I hope this isn’t how it’s supposed to be. I wish I could be specific but my memories get foggy. I think I push them out for my own sake. Well, when I had breakdowns my parents would yell at me or mock me. My mom grabbed my throat once and shoved me against the wall. My dad pushed me down the staircase. They called me names. Was it an everyday occurrence though? No. Not every day. I don’t know how often. Weekly? Monthly. Yearly? Bi yearly? My dad has always yelled and insulted me for small things. But my grandfather did that too, when I spilled a drink on the floor. So is that normal or are my family just evil? I mean they are evil. My aunt recorded her 3 year olds mental breakdown once. They’re all evil. I don’t know why but I can’t remember anything! I’m trying but… I guess it was more emotional neglect than abuse, and when they were verbally abusive, the bottled up emotions just became too much to handle. My mom stopped taking me to therapy after I left school. I guess she thought that was the problem solved. She always treated me like a burden. They told me they didn’t care and that I was just crazy. My dad to this day tells me if I ever go outside when I’m not allowed to he will call the cops and say I am a ‘vulnerable youth’ and ‘too crazy to be out on my own.’ I am a legal adult btw. I don’t know what I’m talking about. I don’t like thinking about this. I’ll never forgive them either way. But I’m not overreacting. I’m not too sensitive. If I was, why would I be so traumatised? Sometimes I hear trauma symptoms and I relate to them a lot. Disassociation is an issue I have been dealing with for ages, for example. I dunno… I don’t care. Either way, I still hate my family.

I saw someone say today “traumas still trauma no matter whos "fault" it is.” Which… makes me feel a little less bad about my previous paragraph. Even if it is my fault, I’m still traumatised.

Okay actually MBTI real. Keiichi I still have no fucking clue for. Te-dom? Te-Si? Is that ESTJ? But wait, I don’t see… I don’t see Si. I see Te but also Se. Actually I see Se-Ti. Logical isn’t the word I would use to describe Keiichi. But if someone came up to him and told him something, but used reasoning that SOUNDED logically sound, I don’t think he’d think too much into it. So he’s Se-Ti but just. Incompetent?

Could he be Fi-dom? Se-Fi maybe? Because he’s very rash about his decisions, like with Teppei in Arc 3, didn’t even consider other peoples feelings in that. ESFP? Maybe? I don’t know. It feels wrong.

Mion seems to be… is saying Se-Fi again silly? Cuz here’s my logic. I don’t see Si-dom. I can see Fe-aux. But if I don’t see Si dom, she can’t be Fe dom. look I’m bad at this, okay? What’s the consensus here? ESFJ? Yeah. I see more Fe than Fi for her. I mean she literally wanted to save Rena from being roblox oofed by the cops last arc despite Rena attacking her brutally. But Si? Actually sure. Makes sense.

Shion… yeah, so, maybe Se? Se-Fi? Uhh… I don’t know… okay, so the consensus is ENFJ. Yeah actually, I was considering that but… Hm. The problem with Shion is that she is introduced as a more intense version of her usual self so it was hard to see Fe-dom. But I see it. Ni aux makes sense. I guess I just default to se-dom when I have no idea.

Rena is a Ne-dom to the point where she is like hilariously Ne dom. Ne-Fi. There’s no question, ENFP there. Hm, people agree. Cool. This was a no-brainer.

Satoko is Se-Fi. Again this one is easy. ESFP. And people agree.

Rika is Ni-Fe, I think, but she’s also kinda careless of her friends sometimes. But Fi-Ne doesn’t feel right. I don’t know why I jumped to her being a feeler anyway. But others agree with me so my lucky guess.

Hanyuu is SiFe I think… oh and people agree…

Satoshi is boring we don’t even need to care about this.

Keiichi: we can’t use violence to solve our problems. Also Keiichi: *fights with old people and goes to the leader of the yakuza to convince her to change her mind.*

Did Mion even try at all? If Oryou is that fickle about helping Satoko, it really does make me wonder. But well, I suppose Keiichi’s “put up a fight” story works. Though why couldn’t Mion do the same? Say that she fought with her grandmother and almost killed her. But I don’t know, if it’s family maybe that’s different. I still hate Oryou. I don’t care about her reputation. When a child is being abused, you help that child, period. There is no excuse. Period.

I know this is ironic because of my beliefs but Mion and Shion’s mom kinda hot? What?! Just because I personally don’t agree with having kids doesn’t mean I can’t be attracted to a MIL- okay, I’m gonna stop. 😭

Akane is so interesting. Apparently there’s a manga airing right now called Higurashi Oni, about Oryou, but I’m avoiding reading anything outside of Meguri for spoilers. Yeah I know I’m aware of most things in the story considering I’ve been a Higu fan since 2018 but- I still want to re-experience things in a perhaps new light.

AKANE?! Keiichi and Satoko shouldn’t be together. Isn’t Keiichi like 14? Okay so Satoko is a year older than I thought. Still, 11 and 14 is weird. 12 and 14 is still weird I think. But the way Satoko is drawn vs Keiichi, yeah, he’s too old for her. No.

So Satoko set up a trap for Teppei?

“There were times when I went on a rampage too,” strange. I never thought Rika did that. I always thought she never harmed anyone.

Takano is soooo hot when she’s probably plotting Jirou’s oofment.

Theory: Rika loses her memories not because of Hanyuu, but because she drinks her, ahem, let’s say orange juice so much she has a… memory loss in the morning, AKA, when she wakes up in the… void? Is that it?

“How dare you talk to the police before talking to us!” Based Satoko? Also I think Hanyuu is ISFJ cuz she seems Si-Fe. Yes I’m still thinking about that.

There was someone? Hanyuu? Hanyuu. Hanyuu didn’t believe.

“What's outside of the well? Is it something worth fighting for? What's outside of the well? Is it something worth getting hurt for? What's outside of the well? I'm going to fight and get hurt in order to find that out. I'm sure what's waiting is a beautiful world. Even if I get to the bottom of the well again. The key to the new world is my willingness to get out of here. Even if I can get out or not, I will eventually get to the new world...” It’s so simple, but effective. I… I am not one to take ‘inspirational’ quotes as gospel. When I was younger, a lyric, a poem, could change my outlook on life. I’m too old to be that easily swayed. I’m too jaded to feel anything but. I guess this poem makes me think, and not a lot of stories make me think. What’s outside of the well? Is it worth fighting for? If my life wasn’t worth it, I would’ve gave up by now, right? So I’m alive because I have some hope, whether I like it or not. And if I’m going to exist without living, without putting in any effort into winning this fight, then I’m just a coward who gets what I deserve. What else can I do? If I look at my life goals enough, maybe, maybe I’m not trying hard enough. Maybe it is my fault, maybe it isn’t. But either way, if I fight enough, can I win? Can sheer willpower make my life, or break me? I think I’d rather be broken than not try. I think I’d rather get my hopes up again than spend another 4 years never leaving the house. I don’t remember if it was 3, 4 or more. But 2022 was when I began leaving the house. This year, all I could do was sit around while other people did the work for me. Why? Why did I allow that? Because they wouldn’t let me. But why should I care what they let me do or not? It’s my life. If I want happiness, I have to fight for it. So, I don’t care what anyone says. If I want to go outside on my own, at my grown age, and look down my town to see if any job openings are there, I should be able to do that. Am I still scared of my parents? How pathetic. They were right, I never grew up. Just not in the way they think. If I’m an adult, I’m on an equal playing field with them. Even if they shelter me, does your landlord control everything you do? No. No they don’t. Can your landlord kick you out for that? No. But parents can. But is being kicked out my worst fear? No. It’s my dads threats to get me locked up in a mental facility if I try leaving, to lie to the cops. That scares me. But I can’t let myself be afraid anymore. So while I can’t let sentiments change my philosophy, it can change the way I implement my philosophy. And because of the existence of this quote, this level of reasoning is possible for Lemon. What do you think, everyone~

Wha- all these years I thought Takano’s first name was Takano. But if her grandfather is Hifumi Takano, then Takano has to be her surname. Isn’t her surname like Miyoko or something? Takano Miyoko. Miyoko Takano. Japanese prioritises family names. So is that a translation thing? No wait, that still makes no sense. Okay so her first name IS Miyo/Miyoko. I always got it the other way around. Easy mistake.

Didn’t need much reason, but have more to hate Irie.

Ryukishi’s words about mysteries makes me think of Scott Cawthon. Remember when the fnaf games were fun to solve and actually had somewhat clear answers? The golden era.

And, is that Bernkastel speaking to us? :0

CH8

You know , what if HS doesn’t exist? What if it’s just mass hysteria? Like sure H173 exists, but naturally occurring? What if that’s just like, a group reaction?

I know it’s just a coincidence, but Eriko is so similar to Erika. In Japanese, it’s very different. -Ko means child. Eri. What could eri mean? Collar? Picture laws of nature? Eri doesn’t mean much. Maybe Eriko is a word! Wait, it means collar child? Really? That’s pathetic. Erika Furudo and Rika Furude are more on the nose. They both can be written similarly to Frederica, I’d assume? According to GT, Frederica is “Furede Rika” in Katakana. I guess for whatever reason Ryukishi decided “ru” fit more than “re.” And Erika Furudo still sounds like Frederica backwards too. But yes, Eriko is just a coincidence. It may be one letter in English but in Japanese こ and か are different suffixes. Ka means flower I believe in suffixes. They’re both popular.

A lot of Higurashi characters have common name suffixes. Rika has ka, Keiichi has ichi, Rena has na, Satoko has ko, but you know who doesn’t? Mion. Mion and Shion aren’t really popular Japanese names. Shi means demon and Mi means uhh, flower I’m pretty sure. What does the ‘o’ mean? I don’t know. お and ん are different.

Bored a fuck won at Trivial Pursuit while listening to Takano’s war ramblings.

Oh, was Miyoko r-worded? I remember hearing that a long time ago, but I wouldn still pick up on it even if I didn’t. So, her friends were killed to set an example. She was taken to the bathroom and forced to… how awful. That’s a little girl.

Maybe I’m reading too deep into this, but maybe Ko was dropped because Miyo didn’t have a proper childhood? Like she felt like she lost her innocence. I know it’s a bit of a stretch but idk. Also I just remembered “4” can be written as both shi and yo, so it isn’t just a kanji thing like I predicted. I believe in Japanese, depending on dialect, different spellings occur? No; not dialect; something else. Sorry if I’m not wording this properly. So, the 34 reference should make more sense to Japanese people. Wait… Mi means 3? Oh! OH! Okay, so there’s two ways to read Japanese, right? So, maybe Mi means 3 in that! Because I learnt 3 as “San” and 4 as “Shi,” so the other way of reading it must be “Mi” and “Yo.” That is 34. I also believe it has relevance to the Greek alphabet, Lambda and Delta. I know Delta is the 4th letter, so I’m assuming Lambda is the 3rd. Bravo. Vi- FUCK, WRONG SHOW. I mean- novel?

Oh yeah, can’t Hifumi be written like “一二三”? Or am I misremembering? ALSO, DONT WHAT INSIDE OF YOU SATOSHI? These translators are dirty. Actually, maybe I’m dirty. Seriously, is that a translation error? I know it’s technically correct but like- it makes it hard to take it seriously when he’s asking the “other” him to not… ahem, “go” inside… his mind.

Shit? Did my draft erase?! Damn, I went on a speech about how it’s been 11 months since I started this journey and all that crap. Well, whatever. I’ll post this then go back and edit it. I say a lot of shit here so if I say anything that doesn’t make sense or is wrong I probably changed my mind along the way.

#Higurashi #lemons random rants #when they cry

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hoe-doroki · 2 years

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hello! thank you for all your fics <3 may i please ask why you no longer write x reader fics? You don't have to answer, I've just been seeing so much negativity and entitlement from anons making writers stop doing what they love, I hope that's not the reason for you.

Ahh, sorry I don't know when this was sent in; I hope you haven't been waiting long. Don't worry, it's nothing negative. I'm really lucky never to have received any hate or been a part of any drama. I've made lovely reader insert friends and it's been a great community to be a part of. I so appreciate your concern, tho. And I'm glad you've enjoyed my stories. <3

Longer answer beneath the cut.

It's kind of a long story, so I'll start off with the tl;dr. Reader insert was always going to be transient for me. I'm a shipper and always have been, and I kind of knew that from the beginning. If you dig reeeeally deep into this blog, you'll see MONTHS of tags where I say "once I find a ship, it's all over here" and "this ship is calling me over, I swear" etc. Tbh, the breadcrumbs have been laid since near the beginning.

I've been reading fic since I was 12, and it was always shipfic. I never liked OC-centered stories, and was only ever drawn to reading and writing canonverse and stuff that felt similar. I don't enjoy deviating from canon. I talk to reader insert friends who have been into fic as long as I have and they talk about making OCs or pairing their faves with characters they could project onto and that was just...never my game. Idk if it's my demisexuality or my lack of imagination, but it's always given me butterflies to read about two characters who I see as really, truly in love. Whereas with reading and writing reader insert, I never cared about reader-chan. Even when I was modeling her exactly after me. I tried to give her depth and make her a good match for her bnha boy, but it was just that. A match to the boy. She was a stand-in, but not for me. For a character that whoever I was writing for would actually love.

I fell into reader insert by accident. I liked Todoroki upon my first watch of the series, and I wanted to read fics with him, but I wasn't jazzed by his ships. I'm usually pretty easy and get into whichever ships are pushed in canon. Like, if they tried harder with IzuOcha, I'd probably be an IzuOcha shipper, lol. But bnha isn't really committed to its, like, 4 or 5 het ships, so I wasn't either. So I clicked around random stories with Shou, stumbled upon reader insert, and I was like eh, that'll do. If there had been a ship I liked, I never would have read a single reader insert fic ever.

And then I got pulled in. Not by reader insert, exactly, but by the community. The blogs, and the friends I started making quickly, which was crazy to me, because I've never been in a fandom as active as this. In other fandoms, I would make a friend or two, but stuff like discord and tumblr friends and groupchats were new. And exciting, especially in the loneliness of covid.

Then I entered a feedback loop. I started reading bkdk as early as November 2020, and I only started reading reader insert in August, writing it in September. But November was also when I joined my first reader insert discord. All my friends were talking about reader insert, and we were all promoting our stories, reading each other's and so my brain kept on being flooded with fic ideas, headcanons, requests. Especially since I was writing all oneshots, mostly nsfw ones which, for me, didn't take a whole lot of effort or time. I started writing for a more (read: the most) popular character, Bakugou, and my fics were becoming popular, in January 2021 I hit 1k followers, I had decent interax, everything was going well.

By this point, I said at least to friends, if not hidden in tags somewhere on this blog, that I was ready to leave reader insert as soon as I had an idea for a bkdk fic. Cold turkey. I was one foot out the door for months before I actually started writing bkdk. But because of that feedback loop, I kept on having reader insert ideas and I wasn't in the same way talking about bkdk, thinking about it, taking the time to try and conjure up a fic idea. I still had wips for reader insert and I wanted to fulfill those promises as well.

Just some discord screenshots with dates, so you can see that the descent is much earlier than you'd think. Plus, past!me says some of this better than I'm managing to here.

The truth is, that I feel nothing towards reader insert now. I kind of want to delete my fics for it all the time because, like, I don't even know who that person was who wrote them. Who was Ana? Not me, and that's why I go by my real name now. I'm not a person who goes through phases, usually. I'm a pretty consistent person, and when I latch onto something, I tend to stick with it for life. Bkdk will be with me for life, I am 100% sure. This was a very strange, out of character blip for me.

And I know that sounds kind of disparaging towards the genre, and I don't mean that at ALL. Reader insert holds so much value as a genre, and it did for me too. You can see from my chat above that it was holding the entirety of my mental health for months. And I'll always value the friends I made. I love that these fics are still enjoyed, so I never will delete them. But I wish that I could fully detach them from myself too. I don't want to give up being able to read the lovely comments and reply back, though. Still, I wish with all my heart that I'd been with bkdk during all that time instead. Bkdk gives me butterflies. It makes me feel warm, makes me feel something like love. Reader insert just doesn't.

There's also a similar story in here about how I got caught in a feedback loop of writing smut too, and I never wanted to be a smut writer. I've written 50 fics or so for bnha, and none of them are my favorites (even the bkdks). My favorite fics, now, are all sfw, shipfic ones I wrote years ago. I don't like that. I want to like my current stuff more. This is why, in addition to retiring from reader insert, I've retired from smut. Smut is also a genre that I love and have mad respect for, but it needs to be as a reader, not a writer. I want to be proud of my fics again, for me, not because they've gotten popular because they're kinky.

So yeah. I left because I never liked reader insert in the first place, but it was a ton of fun to be able to write so prolifically in such a lively community. I'm terribly sorry if this taints my fics in any way to you, like I was flippant while writing them. I wasn't. I always cared about writing them, there was just something big missing for me, and I stayed longer than I should have. That's all. I do appreciate you asking the question; it wasn't an intrusion at all. I give all my love to this community, because it was truly meaningful to me during, as we all know, a terrible, terrible time. But I'm much happier now, and hopefully my next fic will be one I'm truly proud of again.

I hope this answers the question adequately <3

#and with that #goodbye my lovelies <3 #goodbye hoe-doroki <3 #bless everyone in this lovely community; keep doing what you do #ask ana #johnsrevelation

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moonbear-from-space · 1 year

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A year has past or so snice I been in the Venom fandom and Spider-Man in some aspects as well. As I think it's time to talk about my very long story of how I got into this to begin with.

So this will be a very long story, so get yourself comfy if you wish to read it.

‐------------------------------------------

It all begins in the year of 2018. The first Venom movie came out or at least the trailer, at the time I was like "why are they making a movie about a villain for?" Yes this was my reaction to it and oh boy I was very wrong about that.

Because my only knowledge at the time was I thought Venom was the quote bad guy likely because of SM3, even though I didn't see that movie in full I just knew that Venom was the villain of the story. But also at the time, I didn't know who Eddie Brock was, I didn't know Venom had a host or even could do that and was just some evil Spider Man guy that was just some monster.

The only things I remember was I saw a handful of Venom fan art, I just thought people ship Eddie and Venom just for the fun of it and didn't know that they were a couple. I remember hearing that they were gay and heard it was a thing in the comics. And had that moment of "oh maybe I might give it a watch" and never got around to.

So a few years past and forget everything that I knew about that because it just didn't fully phase me at the time. And thanks to funny enough Ben 10 that kick started my love for aliens. Everything change in 2021 when I was at college in my class and saw one of the class members in there watching Venom: LTBC.

I saw and realise that it was Venom and had no idea that a second movie came out. I ask them about what they were watching and said it was the second Venom movie. I got me actually interested idk what happen but something just dragged me into it, maybe it was the universe had something plan for me.

Or maybe it was because early that year I was was watching USM cartoon with my boyfriend as we were going threw all of the Man of Action cartoons they have made. So seeing Venom in that got me interested about him even before.

Later my dad and my sister were gonna go off to see it and I just wanted to join because I just wanted to see a movie because last thing I saw at the time in cinemas was the Sonic movie. My dad said to me I could only see it if I saw the first one and later on we both sat down to watch it as in good timing it was airing on tv.

I know a lot of people have mix feelings of these movies but honestly I fell in love with it. With me already loving Ben 10 it gave me vibes of that in some ways. It had this very 00s feel to it all.

So once I saw it and realise how cool Venom was and he was just misunderstood and not really a villain more of a anti-hero. Even Venom saying he is a loser made me realise that he wasn't this mindless creature there so much more to him. Also the voice just making me think of a Ben 10 alien, that's also what was appealing about him and the first thing I thought of when hearing his voice in full.

Next was of course seeing the second movie, with finding out context about them being a gay couple in the comics, again after not remembering. It made me more interested in these characters even more.

So me, my dad and my sister all went to see and we all enjoy it. We all had a blast, I remember my dad and me laughing the most and I had the biggest smile on my face coming outta it. I never felt that happy in so long and finally finding a new interested to be fixated on after trying to find something new for so long, was satisfying to say at least.

Again people have mix feelings about these movies but honestly, these movies mean a lot to me. I love them for there goofyness and camp. They made me find happiness again, they made me inspired and so what if there strange or doesn't have the perfect writing or whatever. It was the just the vibes that made me love it the most.

Especially the rave scene part. That whole speech Venom had was simple at best, but it was touching. It something I needed to hear as it was the year I came out as bi online. I wasn't sure if I was being true to myself and thought I was lying to myself, however that moment with what Venom said made me proud of myself. So it was in a way all thanks to Venom for making me even more bi. (Then also later on found out I was gender fuild as well.)

I had a better understanding of things and myself and felt free. I use to be unsure of myself a lot because I forced myself to hide what I was really feeling in fear of what others might of said. Or being forced not to feel that way, that and I was also around some not so nice people at the time so that didn't help ether. Venom: LTBC was kinda similar in a metaphorical way to what I was going threw.

But yeah, after that I got into Venom and Spider Man too over all. From seeing fan art, fics and then reading the comics, I love the 90s Venom comic and some of the recent-ish ones too and also binging threw all the Spidey movies so I could be ready to watch Spider Man: NWH. Oh some of the Spidey cartoons as well.

Granted I did previously see the some of of Spidey movies as a kid. Like the Raimi Spidey films seeing 1&2 and a bits and pieces of the third one on tv. I saw TASM1 in cinemas and then Spiderverse way later on and both love those movies and so on.

But yeah overall Venom has done a lot of good for me. I'm glad to be part of it and with the many ups and downs I seen its made me learn to appreciate more things and so on. Without Venom I would of not met the amazing friends I have made or the stuff I drawn, or even braching off into getting into others things like horror and such.

Its done a lot of good overall and I wouldn't be here or be who I am now without it. Every little thing helped a long way to try new things because you never know you might learn something new about yourself, that you didn't know before.

Thank you for taking time to read this. Sorry if this was a long ramble but I been meaning to talk about this for some time now, so I hope you enjoy it.

#long text post #im so sorry that this is long #i had a lot to say okay #story time #venom #spider man #my dumb posts #a very long story #i could of said more maybe but dear god i would be here all day writing this xD #i had to cut out so much before because it drag on way too long #but yeah hope you dont mind the long text post

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asweetprologue · 3 years

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Nili’s Benchmark Geraskier Fic Rec List

hey yall! I officially hit 750 followers (a few days ago, I blew past the benchmark without even realizing!), which is... insane. I truly can’t believe that so many people over the last year have enjoyed my presence in this fandom enough to continue to follow my work. you guys are so great and I love you all so much, so I decided to put together a gift for you!

this is a list of my favorite geraskier fics from the fandom, which I have been putting together over the last year or so. a few of these are big in the fandom, but a lot of them are smaller pieces that I feel deserve more attention! I have provided ao3 and tumblr links where I could find them, as well as ratings and summaries. Most of these are canon!verse because I’m not personally a big fan of modern au’s, but there will be a few of those scattered throughout as well. I’ve divided the fics into two sections: oneshots and multichapter. See the list below the cut!

Being in this fandom truly has gotten me through the pandemic in a big way and I have made so many good friends while here. thank you all for validating my weird obsession with these characters and enabling me in these trying times <3

Oneshots

all that was good, all that was fair (all that was me is gone) | M | 7517 | WARNING: Graphic Depictions Of Violence | @xdandelionxbloomx

Somewhere, deep in a forest, a man drags himself from his grave by sheer power of will. He lies gasping on the forest floor and does not know who or what he is. The world is wide and wonderful, though, and there is so much to see.

Or, Jaskier is so stubborn that he literally comes back from the dead.

Another fascinating addition to the mythology of the Witcher. Jaskier’s slow rediscovery of himself is so well done here. One I’ve come back to again and again.

As Fast As Love Can Go | T | 9628 | @bygodstillam

There are Faeries in the Wood.

That's what everyone said, at least, not that there was any solid proof. Jaskier had tried, more than once, to find some. Just a hint somewhere, of a real story, of real magic. But all anyone seemed to have was stories.

Jaskier was determined to find proof. He wasn't expecting to find a witcher in the process.

Fascinating fic with some really interesting worldbuilding, and a fresh new take on True Love’s Kiss. Also with some great art by @hehearse!

beautiful, he stirs up still things | T | 2575 | @alittlebitmaybe

“You’re not asking me to dance,” says Geralt.

Jaskier turns his palm up on his knee, offering it. “I think you’ll find I am.”

Just them dancing. This is a lovely sort of pre-relationship dynamic. So soft.

Dialogue Prompt | NR | 2932 | @reinvent-and-believe

Dialogue Prompt 48: “You make me want things I can’t have.” Wordless I-love-you 50: buying them a special treat when you go out shopping

Geralt gets Jaskier a gift, which prompts some confessions.

Even a small love | E | 22,272 | WARNING: Rape/Non-Con

“Well,” Jaskier replies distractedly. “Lots of things want to strangle you.”

“You don’t.”

It isn’t a particularly troublesome accusation, or even necessarily an accusation at all.

This is one I read early on in the fandom, and it really stuck with me. The dynamic between Jaskier and Geralt is perfect, and the misunderstandings between them feel so realistic. The non-con is not extreme, but do mind the warnings.

For the Space of a Heartbeat | T | 2021 | @drowningbydegrees

As it turns out, falling into bed with your very best friend who you are privately very much in love with isn't nearly so nerve wracking as waking up with them the morning after.

Just sweet, morning after discussions. I love to see them talking for once.

Greensleeves | T | 10,414 | @rebrandedbard

When Geralt crosses paths with Jaskier in the spring, the world is dressed in green. Quite literally. Everyone everywhere is wearing green, and it all comes down to a song Jaskier has written that, to his mortification, has become popular throughout the Continent. It's torment, being forced to preform the song over and over again and have his heart broken anew. But who is this Lady Greensleeves the people say Jaskier is so maddeningly, heartbrokenly in love with? At the baron's wedding party, Geralt is determined to find out.

This is one of my personal faves - there’s just something about Jaskier’s feelings being put on blast while Geralt remains totally oblivious that I think is so very them. And the resolution at the end is delightful.

I Don’t Wanna Fall (If It’s Not In Love) | E | 13,902 | @writinglizards

The first time it's out of desperation. Things get rapidly out of hand from there.

OR the building of a relationship through mutual wank sessions.

I love everything Ashley writes, but this one was the first fic I read by her and it still has a warm place in my heart. I also highly recommend It’s Been A While (makes me cry every time) and Tell Me Honestly

Like a Storm, Like a Flood | T | 1065 | @valdomarx

Jaskier is leaving for the winter, and Geralt can't bear the thought of not seeing him for months.

It was soooo hard to pick only one fic by George, but this one is so soft and sweet and yearning I just had to go with it. This is really just about Geralt finally hitting a breaking point and saying enough is enough.

one flesh | E | 10,763 | WARNING: MCD

“Well, then. I’m a ghost.” Jaskier spread his arms grandly. Geralt held his gaze for a moment, then dropped his head and laughed. Jaskier put his hands on his hips. “Do fill me in on what’s so funny.” It wasn’t funny. It was just so - ridiculous, the things Geralt’s fucked up brain would invent. This had to be the last nail in the sanity coffin, it just had to be.

Or: Jaskier is a ghost, and Geralt is a mess.

Jaskier dies and comes back as a ghost to haunt Geralt into taking care of himself. Geralt does not handle this gracefully. This fic is so sad and heartbreaking, but the ending is so sweet.

to render it transparent | E | 23,901

Geralt wakes up warm, peaceful, and utterly content, which is how he knows that something is severely wrong.

Sigh. This fic. This is a time travel fic - Geralt ends up in the future living with Jaskier on the coast, just after the mountain. It’s slow and beautiful and extremely bittersweet, all about how we choose to love people despite how much it can hurt us.

With All the Continent A Stage | M | 4745 | @greyduckgreygoose

Later, Geralt learned that the play was four hours long. Four hours long. It didn’t feel like it. Most of it passed by in a fever dream of ominous music, dance-fighting and dryads in gossamer leaves, swinging from hoops attached to the ceiling. Yennefer made an appearance, played by Priscilla in a glittering negligee. She sang a song to Geralt about putting him “Under Her Spell”, and they had a sensual dance number which was made a little strange by a sickened Jaskier (played by Jaskier) coughing loudly in the background.

(Jaskier invites Geralt to a musical production inspired by his own life.)

Jaskier basically writes Geralt a love letter in the form of a four hour long play. Geralt is an idiot about it.

Multi-Chapter Fics

A Lover’s Lament | M | 25,364 | @somedrunkpirate

So,” Jaskier begins, as casually as he can, “you are telling me, that in theory, if I were to be in love with someone — anyone — that person could well be in terrible danger?”

Of all terrible and ridiculous things that have threatened Geralt’s safety, Jaskier’d never thought that loving him might be what will get him killed.

I honestly can’t count the number of times I’ve read this fic. The monster is so interesting, and the mythos of it fits seamlessly into the world of the Witcher in my mind. Jaskier being so afraid that his feelings are going to put Geralt at risk, clearly unable to see that Geralt is going through the exact same thing. I think about the scene with them looking at each other almost daily.

A Pair of Gloves, the Scent of Roses | M | 24,134 | WARNING: Graphic Depictions of Violence

In the bustling days before the Midsummer festival, Geralt is sent into the countryside to deal with a monster - with Jaskier once again by his side. But the bard has not forgiven him, and while he's not hiding his contempt for the Witcher, he is recalcitrant about revealing his true motives for joining him. As the hunt turns into a desperate mission to save an innocent man and the monster is not what is seems to be, Geralt learns a few new things about his old friend and decides to finally attempt to mend the rift between them...

This is one of my favorite’s in the fandom - it feels so believable, the world is so rich and the oc’s are convincing and charming. Geralt and Jaskier feel so honest here, stumbling around each other but still drawn together. Beautiful beautiful beautiful

Bearing the will of the flower | NR | 11,449

The way Jaskier sees it, his hobby of following a witcher around was always pretty likely to get him killed.

The fact that it's happening now because the witcher in question doesn't love him, he thinks as he coughs up crumpled flowers, hardly makes a difference.

My favorite hanahaki fic in the fandom. I’m such a sucker for these, and these two idiots being so incapable of talking about their feelings really makes them prime candidates.

Food of Love | T | 22,488 | @wallatile-qvibbler

I brought a dead princess back to life through the power of song is the kind of thing that would have got an eyebrow raise even from the stone-faced Geralt of Rivia, so it's a good thing he and Geralt will probably never see each other again.

(or: the one where Jaskier channels magic through his songs, and it almost never goes as expected.)

This is a Jaskier and Renfri centric fic, which wasn’t something I knew I wanted until I read this. Jaskier is a bard which in this AU comes with magical powers, but it feels so well integrated into the universe that I wish it was just... how the Witcher is. Renfri is so good here, and even though Jaskier and Geralt barely even interact you can feel the tension and love between them. Cannot recommend highly enough.

friends and allies of the witcher | T | 10,312 | @theamazingbard

Yennefer crawls over to her newest cellmate. They’re curled up on their side. Breathing, but only just. She’s not sure what she’s hoping for when she turns them over. Still isn’t when she sees that it is indeed Jaskier.

“Shit."

Yennefer and Jaskier each suffer in more ways than one at the hands of Nilfgaard.

Yennefer and Jaskier get capture by Nilfgaard and tossed into a cell together. Exactly what I want out of season 2 honestly. Their interactions are gold.

I’d Be the Choiceless Hope | E | 45,188 | WARNING: Rape/Non-Con | @lesdemonium

As a baby, Jaskier was visited by a fae, who gifted Jaskier's mother with Jaskier's obedience. As Jaskier grew older, the "gift" became more of a curse.

You know I’m not gonna make a rec list without listing Zoe’s Ella Enchanted au. Need I say more?

Silver and Copper | M | 56,139 | WARNING: Graphic Depictions of Violence | @kaer-cuan

Geralt is just supposed to pass through the quiet Lettenhove area. He's not anticipating being begged by its people to help save their viscount from a curse that keeps him from daylight. Lord Jaskier, they call him, and he's likely dying.

As Geralt struggles to untangle the ugly web of history that has lead to the increasingly complicated curse, he finds himself spending more and more time with the strange young viscount and wondering just what he might have been before the curse, and who he might be after. But things are not always as they seem, and as the curse tightens its grip on Jaskier, Geralt is forced to face the fear of failing yet another person whose choices were stolen from them.

Or-

Jaskier is kept from becoming a bard. Geralt finds him anyway.

This is a fic that haunts me. It’s very scary in parts, and mind the tags - there are some very heavy themes here. But it’s beautiful and touching, and Jaskier feels very true to himself even though his origin is so different.

we could be married (and then we'd be happy) | E | 50,222 | @a-kind-of-merry-war

Jaskier reached into his pocket, fingers grasping around the little box. He pulled it out with what he hoped was a romantic flourish, flipping it open to reveal the simple gold band inside. “Geralt,” he said, confidently, cooly, like this wasn’t terrifying, “Will you marry me?”

Geralt and Jaskier fake marriage proposals to get free deserts and shit but it goes tits up when Vesemir catches them in the act. Not knowing how to fess up, they go along with it for a while, which is hell because they’re both pining like mad. As I said, I don’t love modern au’s, but it’s merry so of course this one had to end up on my list.

And that’s it! 20 fics for you, and hopefully you can all find one or two you haven’t read before. There are a lot of people and fics that I didn’t include in this list only because I was trying to not put a million down (which I could). I highly recommend anything by @wherethewordsare, @julek, @contemplativepancakes, @witcher-and-his-bard, and @inber, as well as those linked to fics above, and I’m sure there are others I forgot to mention. Yall have truly made being in this fandom worthwhile <3

#geraskier #geraskier fic recs #geralt of rivia #geralt #jaskier #witcher #fic recs #fic rec #I'm certain i missed a lot of good ones I've read over the years but I didn't want to risk making this super fucking long anyways #if you didn't see your name listed it isn't bc I don't adore you and your fics it's because i'm stupid <333

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johaerys-writes · 3 years

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Fandom: The Song of Achilles

Pairing: Achilles/Patroclus

My entry for Day 1: Music & Day 2: Deities of @patrochillesweek 2021! Where the Greeks in Troy celebrate Dionysus' festival, and Achilles and Patroclus spend some time alone (~4.5k words, rated E for smut, check Ao3 link for full list of tags)

Read on Ao3!

Chapter 1: With a Shuddering Gasp

The music from the lyres and cymbals drifted through the camp, mingling with the crackling of flames from the many bonfires that had been lit. The celebrations for Dionysus’ festival had been going on for most of the day and the night before, and the scent of incense and wine hung heavy in the air.

I had never before attended such a festival. It wasn’t celebrated this widely in Opus or Phthia, where I had grown up. The Dionysia was among the largest festivals in Athens, celebrated with days and nights filled with drink, dance and theatrical performances of all kinds. Here, in the Achaean’s camp, where people from the farthest reaches of Greece gathered, it had quickly become a tradition.

I had been in the healers’ tent for most of the day, and now the moon hung high over the dark sea. My fingers were red from scrubbing, my eyes were tired, and the pungent scent of astringent was thick in my nostrils. I was weary, but it was a pleasant sort of weariness. When I worked, my mind was free of thoughts, of worries. I focused only on the act of healing, on helping the wounded soldiers as best I could. A bloody skirmish earlier that day had filled the beds in the tent to bursting, yet no lives had been lost. Perhaps the Trojans had been as tired of bloodshed as the Greeks were on that chilly February afternoon.

“Your wound needs to be cleaned and dressed once a day,” I told the soldier I'd been tending to, securing the bandage around his arm. “And stay away from the thick of the fight, if you can help it. Sweat and dirt will only slow down the healing.”

He nodded and stood up, limping away. I brushed the sweat from my brow with the back of my hand, letting out a soft sigh, just as Philomela, one of the healers’ assistants, approached me.

“It’s late, Patroclus,” she said. “You should join the celebrations, before they are over.”

I smiled at her. She was small in stature, with her wild curly hair bound in tight braids. She was one of Menelaus’ women, taken after an attack on one of the northern villages of Troy. She’d been brought to me one day with a cut on her thigh, her knees scraped, her eyes wide in panic and terror. I had been the first to treat her, and she had since regarded me with kindness and reserved affection. Menelaus was kind with his women, and he often let her join me while I worked, helping me, and I taught her what I knew.

“I don’t often join festivals like these,” I told her earnestly. “There's too much noise and commotion, and I am not a heavy drinker.”

“What about your prince?” she asked, her gaze darting away before settling on me again. “Achilles?”

The name was uttered quietly, almost apprehensively. It always stung, just a little, to know that the captives thought of Achilles with so much trepidation. His exploits had earned him something of a reputation, as I understood it: the Greeks revered him, while the Trojans feared the very mention of him. Philomela had visited our camp once or twice, and had seen that Achilles was quiet, almost gentle, when he wasn’t in his armour, yet a hint of disquiet was always there.

I shook my head, dipping my hands in the brass bowl that we used to clean ourselves. The water was cold and refreshing when I splashed it over my face and neck.

“Achilles does not much enjoy noisy gatherings like these either,” I said. “He... prefers being on his own these days.”

It had not always been so. Achilles relished the attention of others; he blossomed with it, and there was bound to be much of it if he joined in the celebration. His campaigns over the last couple of months had been met with overwhelming success, filling his men’s coffers with gold and riches and their camps with slaves. The leaders of the Achaeans would toast him and drink plenty of wine in his honour, the bards would sing of his achievements and his skill in battle until the early morning. Yet, boasting such as this was not always met with alacrity. There were many amongst the Danaans that envied Achilles the power of his station, and sneered at his reputation when they thought he was out of earshot.

Achilles was proud, and rarely paid attention to rumours and gossip. Yet, when he sometimes refused to grace Agamemnon’s lavish dinners with his presence, I could tell it was because the leader of the Greeks occasionally had trouble holding his tongue, especially after a few cups of wine. That was when the older man would gloat and boast, often blowing his own achievements out of proportion, in an effort to measure up to Achilles’ greatness, his promise of glory, the prophecy that had followed him since the moment of his birth, his reputation that only grew, day after day.

One does not need the blood of a goddess, he would say, his cheeks flushed from the drink, eyes gleaming, after recounting a story that was supposedly about a hero of old, if they have the favour of one. Would you not agree, Pelides?

Achilles pretended not to hear, not to know. He would smile at Agamemnon with all his teeth and toast him graciously, as Peleus had taught him, but he was still a man. He had learned to hide his true feelings from others, but I could still see how the whispers fuelled his frustration, how they turned him bitter, even when he insisted they did not.

Achilles was sharp and direct from nature; it troubled him when others were not. He wanted things to be simple and clear-cut, yet, here, they were anything but.

I sighed again, patting my hands dry on a linen towel. Philomela was by my side when we walked out of the tent, and into the festivities. The bonfires were burning high into the night, and from the lit braziers tendrils of incense smoke curled towards the stars. Soldiers and their women gathered around the heat, drinking and dancing to the rhythm of the music that the bands were tirelessly playing. Not a few were wearing animal furs, their faces darkened with soot, as was the custom.

No sooner had I walked out than someone grabbed me by the arm and thrust a cup of wine in my hands. I blinked up, startled, to see Diomedes grinning at me.

"Come," he said. "Drink. Celebrate with us."

I smiled politely and shook my head. "I really should be going back."

"What for?" Odysseus was quick to appear beside him, his usual easy smile ready on his lips. "You've been working all day. Everyone deserves a break, from time to time."

"That's right." Diomedes' wolfish grin got wider, his dark eyes sparkling. "All work and no play makes people dull, haven't you heard?"

Odysseus smiled encouragingly at me behind the rim of his own cup. "Have a drink with us. Just because he doesn't join us anymore doesn't mean you can't."

Of course he was referring to Achilles. It had not gone unnoticed that he had been avoiding gatherings such as these of late. I swallowed as I accepted the cup and reluctantly brought it to my lips. If my presence there could smooth those ruffled feathers, then a drink or two couldn't be that bad, could it?

The wine hit my tongue in a rush of heat, honey and spices. It warmed me as it glided down my throat, pushing the edges of my weariness away. I took another draught, letting its acidic sweetness jolt me awake.

My mild surprise must have been plain on my features, for Diomedes clapped me on the shoulder, chuckling knowingly. "That's it," he said, "that's a good lad. Now, drink up."

I didn't need further encouragement. The wine was unlike any I've ever tried; before long, I had drained my cup, and a servant had filled it to the brim again. The wild cadence of the drums and the flutes matched the beats of my heart, and I wasn't even thinking about my tired and aching limbs when Menelaus' arm wound around my shoulders, pulling me towards the writhing, undulating crowd.

In the smoke of the fires, in the heat of so many bodies moving close together, I forgot about my troubles, my worries. The edges of consciousness blurred, a mist that curled around me, rendering me indefinable. I closed my eyes and simply moved to the rhythm, blending into the crowd like a single petal amongst countless falling cherry blossoms, swirling with the wind.

In the depth of that mist, in the midst of that insubstantial territory, I saw him.

Achilles.

I saw him as he was once, years before, far away from the fires and blood of the war, from the intrigue, the whispers, the jealousy. I saw him running down the beach in Phthia, the pink undersides of his feet flickering. I saw the rich honey brown strands that hid in the depths of his golden hair, the wind that combed through them and brought them before his eyes when he turned to look at me. I saw him swimming in the stream in Pelion, the water running down his limbs in laze swirls.

I could see him clearly in my mind's eye, as if he were there. I could see him laughing, singing, playing his lyre in the pale light of morning, golden and vibrant and carefree. And in him, I saw myself.

I opened my eyes as the beat of the music reached a wild crescendo, as the people cheered and sang at the top of their lungs. Cups were raised high up in the air, wine swirling, overflowing, spilling from its confines and mixing with the brown dirt underfoot. Menelaus was dancing with one of his women — Aristea, his favourite, the fabric of her colourful dress tangling at her ankles as he swirled her about. Her laughter was drowned out by the noise, fading away.

I took a deep breath to center my focus, and stepped back, away from the crowd. My heart was still beating fast, and the music was hypnotic, but I knew I had to return to my own camp before it got too late.

Odysseus and Diomedes were caught in the festivities as well, so no one noticed me slipping away. Only Philomela's eyes caught mine amidst the sea of bobbing heads, and pushed her way towards me. She was holding a bowl filled with the sweets that the slaves had made earlier that day for the festival, dried fruits stuffed with nuts and drenched with syrup.

"For you," she said, smiling warmly at me, "and your prince."

The music and noisy chatter from the festival had dulled to a hazy, distant thrum by the time I made my way back to our camp. I was still feeling lightheaded from the drink, breathless from dancing and weaving through the endless rows of tents and throngs of inebriated, laughing soldiers. My brow was damp with sweat despite the chilly night, and my pulse still thumped in my throat in a strange sort of anticipation, a restless hunger. I clutched the bowl close to my chest, and hurried on.

The soft, plaintive sounds of Achilles’ lyre reached me as soon as I caught sight of the Phthian banners, fluttering in the breeze at the edges of our encampment.

Achilles was sitting on a bench, my mother’s golden lyre nestled in his lap. His fingers ran over the strings languidly, plucking notes that were brighter than water from a babbling stream, sweeter than honey. In the fire’s trembling halo, he seemed ethereal, very nearly transparent, yet at the same time more vibrant than I had ever seen him, dispelling the darkness of the night beyond. His hair caught the amber light on the flames and reflected it in aureate strands, his skin shimmered like polished gold, the muscles of his arms rose and fell underneath it like waves with every movement.

Beautiful, my mind supplied, as it always did when I looked at him. I had been gazing upon him since I was a child; it still was not enough for me to get used to him, to the effortless grace of his presence, the perfect symmetry of his eyes, his lips. The festivities that had been raging for a day and a night may have well been for Dionysus, yet it was Achilles, right there before me, who looked like a god, one for whom people gathered on wintry nights like this, to drink and dance and fornicate in his honour.

Would people remember him with kindness, I wondered, many years from now?

His jade green eyes snapped up to mine, and the familiar heat rushed through me, brushing away my swirling, distracted thoughts.

He set the lyre beside him and stood up. “You stayed with the healers until late tonight,” he said.

“I did,” I replied simply, standing at the edge of the fire. The bowl with the sweets was still cradled in my chest. Achilles glanced at it curiously, then at me.

“Is there something amiss?” he asked.

Of course he could tell I was different, just by looking at me, without me having to say anything. He always understood so much more about me than he let on.

“I just like looking at you.”

Achilles tilted his head ever so slightly to the side in question, a tiny fox’s smile curling the edges of his lips. He stood up and paced towards me unhurriedly, his footsteps barely audible on the soft earth.

My pulse raced ever so slightly when his finger brushed carefully under my eye. “You’re flushed,” he said.

“I had some wine. At the festival.”

“Ah.” His finger travelled higher, tracing my cheekbone. “Your pupils are larger than usual. What did you do?”

“Nothing.” I smiled. “It’s so I can see you better.”

Achilles huffed a quiet laugh at that, his features softened by pleasure. He always liked it when I gazed at him, praised him. The sound of his laughter slithered down my spine like warmed honey.

I do not know what possessed me then. Perhaps it was the drink, or the moon that hung high above us like a silver coin, or the way the firelight danced in his eyes and caressed the side of his face, but I had to be alone with him.

I took his hand in mine, walking backwards towards our tent. I could not look away, nor did I want to.

“One of Menelaus’ women gave me these sweets,” I told him. “They’re for you.”

“Is that so?” he hummed, amused. He caught on the game I was playing instantly, by reflex. “Then I’ll be sure to try them.”

We stepped in the tent together, the leather flap closing soundlessly behind us. I set the bowl on the low table that stood in the center of the place that we had come to call home, ever since we’d come to Troy.

We stood opposite each other across the table, facing each other, our breaths the only sounds. I swallowed; I did not know why I was feeling so restless all of a sudden, like it was the first time we had found ourselves alone.

“Take your pick,” I said, gesturing at the bowl.

Achilles quirked a fair brow as he glanced down at them, like a lord perusing a lowly merchant’s stall. “I will not choose at random,” he replied in an artfully haughty tone. “You must choose for me. You are my therapon; I know you will choose well.” He was in a playful mood, smiling at me like a mischievous boy; I loved it when he got like this. I didn’t often get to see him like that anymore.

I picked up one of the sweets and brought it to my lips. My teeth sank in the supple flesh of a dried fig, the walnuts within it softened from the syrup. I chewed slowly, my eyes never leaving him.

“How is it?” he asked. “Is it good?”

I shook my head. “Not good enough for you, my prince.”

Achilles bit back a grin, eyes shining. “Go on, then. Try another.”

And so I did. I picked up the syrupy fruits slowly, one after another, watching him. Every time Achilles asked me how it was, I answered in the same fashion: “Not good enough for you, my prince.”

I tried one of every sweet in the bowl, until my tongue clung to the roof of my mouth with the sweetness. When I had finished my thorough examination, Achilles crossed his arms leisurely before his chest.

“So, what is your verdict?” he asked, smirking. “Which one amongst them is the sweetest for me?”

I licked my lips, sticky with honey and spices, as my heartbeat soared. I reached into the bowl and dipped two fingers in the syrup, then slowly, holding Achilles’ gaze, I lifted them to my neck, dragging them across my skin.

“I am, my prince.”

Achilles’ eyes flashed in the half dark. There was something feral about the way his gaze honed in on me; a hunter’s gleam. He circled the table, closing the distance between us in two well-measured strides. I could smell the sweet scent of his sweat as he leaned in close, and a deeper, muskier one; the smell of his arousal. I bit the inside of my lip as his arm wound around my waist, pulling me until I was flush against him.

“Then I shall have you,” he whispered in my ear.

I shivered when his tongue brushed the side of my neck, warm and slick, velvet smooth. My head tipped backwards and I clung to him, holding him tight against me. His skin was hot to the touch underneath the fabric of his chiton, hotter than my own. Achilles’ mouth traced the hollow of my throat, the line of my jaw, the curve of my chin, before brushing over my own.

“I believe,” he hummed, his tongue flicking over my bottom lip, “this, here, is the sweetest yet.” His hands were on the base of my spine, drawing me in, and I was helpless in his hold. “You chose well.”

A soft moan escaped me, my fingers sinking into Achilles’ fragrant strands while he kissed me until my breath was all but gone from me. I followed the line of his neck, his shoulder, undoing the golden clasps that held his chiton in place. I could feel the weight of his waking interest pressing up against my thigh, and I suddenly couldn’t bear the feeling of clothes between us, or anything else; it had to be just us.

I pushed the fabric down, caressing and kissing every inch of skin I uncovered. I looked up at him when I had sunk down on my knees before him, bare as he was, his form illuminated by the shifting light of the brazier. My pulse hummed in my ears as I let my gaze follow the muscled planes of his chest and stomach, the definition in his arms, the strength of his powerful legs. He was watching me, too, through eyelashes that gleamed like threads of gold.

“My sweet Patroclus,” he whispered, thumb brushing over my lips, and in his gaze that familiar fondness lingered, unchanged through the many years I’d known him.

This. This was how I liked him best. When he was naked before me, body and heart, looking at me like this, touching me like this. This was when I knew he was mine, and mine alone; the world could not take this from me. From us.

I leaned forward and wrapped my lips around him, taking him in my mouth. Achilles shivered underneath me, his lips falling open on a quiet moan. His emerald eyes were dark with wanting, bottomless, when he reached down and threaded his long fingers through my hair. I was caught, pinned under that gaze, magnetised.

“Achilles,” I breathed, kissing the smooth skin of his navel as I stroked him, breathing in the musk of his sweat, the scent that rose from him: sandalwood, pomegranate, almonds and earth.

His hold on the back of my head tightened. He pulled me up gently and nudged me towards our bed, and I followed, half stumbling over my own toes.

My back sank into the furs as Achilles climbed over me, hovering above me. His smile was half-obscured by the trembling shadows, framed by the curtain of golden hair that fell around his face. The scent of the oil he used wafted in the air when he opened the vial that lay beside our bed.

“There’s more I haven’t tried,” he said.

“Is there?” I whispered. I spread my thighs wider apart, sighing when I felt the pressure of his fingers between my legs.

“Yes.” He kissed and nipped his way down, glancing up at me mischievously every time his fingers and tongue drew more shivers from me. His breath was hot over me when he said, “I have saved the best for last.”

I laughed, but the edges of my laughter broke on a strained sob of pleasure. I could feel him everywhere, his hands wandering all over me, the heat of his mouth swallowing me whole. I closed my eyes and surrendered to him, to this blissful, blessed torture. I was helplessly drawn to him, in his hands a mere plaything. Like the lyre he played, I was but an instrument, his touches drawing sounds from me that were meant for his ears alone.

When my heart had been filled to bursting, just when I thought that I would unravel in his hands, he pulled back, climbing back up the length of me again. His cheeks were flushed and so were his lips, his length hard against my skin where it touched me.

I reached up and cupped the back of his neck, heart beating wildly in my chest. “Is there more you’d like to try?” I asked in a teasing whisper. “Or have you had enough?”

“Enough?” His laughter was husky, a tad breathless. He kissed me deeply, reaching for the oil once more. “I’ll never have enough, philtatos.”

I gasped softly when he pressed against me, opening me up. My arms and legs wound around him, as if by rote, clutching him hard, pulling him to me. We were flush against each other, our bodies locking perfectly like two pieces of a whole. There was no one else but him in the world; there was no room for anything else. Just my skin touching his skin, the smell of his hair and the sweetness of his mouth, his quiet sighs in the half dark, and this hunger: these endless wells of aching want that existed between us, this fire that burned eternal.

We moved and breathed in unison, the edges between us blurring once more, our bodies melting into one. I closed my eyes and lost myself in that heat, that pressure, the pleasure that built and built, yet it was still him that I saw behind my eyelids. Even when my gaze turned inward and I drifted, swimming in the deepest recesses of my mind, I could always find him there, waiting for me, his image crisp as if he were right before me. He was a part of me, as I was of him; there was no me without him.

Achilles buried his face in the crook of my neck as he thrust deeper, harder, more urgently. His brow was damp with sweat now, his fingers digging into the flesh of my thigh where he held me fast. I was pinned underneath him, legs spread open at either side of his powerful hips, my hands roaming over the taut muscles of his back. Muscles that I knew better than my own, lines and angles that I could trace in the dark, with my eyes closed.

“Patroclus,” Achilles said in a shuddering gasp against my throat as his thrusts got faster, more erratic. “Patroclus—”

Achilles often got impatient, chasing his finish like a lion locked on to a deer, yet I didn’t want this to end just yet. I didn’t want to lose this warm, melding feeling. I hugged him tightly and pushed him to the side, flipping us both around.

I pinned his wrists above his head and held his gaze as I rolled my hips slowly, sinking down on him.

Achilles looked up at me, flushed and panting, his skin glistening, his hair spread in lazy golden swirls about his head. I leaned down, pressing my forehead to his.

“The fastest of the Greeks,” I hummed, “in all things, it seems.”

Achilles laughed, the sound vibrating through me where we were connected. “A champion in all things, you mean.” He grinned wickedly, yet it wasn’t long before his laughter turned into breathless, shaky moans again, his length stiffening within me. My name poured forth from his mouth with every breath, over and over, kissing it onto my lips, whispering it over my flushed and warmed up skin.

Achilles had never told me that he loved me, and I had never told him. It was always understood between us, a truth as natural as breathing, buried deep beneath our skin and woven in our bones. Yet when he said my name like this — Patroclus, Pa-tro-clus — repeated it like a chant, like it was holy, I knew well what he meant.

And so did he.

“Achilles,” I whispered into his hair, threading my fingers through his. “Achilles,” I gasped when he bucked, arching underneath me. “Achilles,” I breathed, when I felt the warmth of his pleasure blossoming inside me, when he melted in my arms, when his eyelids fell over his eyes like the petals of a nightflower at dusk.

We lay like this for a long while, arms and legs tangled atop the furs. I held him tight, long after our breaths had eased and our heartbeats had found their natural rhythm. The music and voices from the festival drifted through the leather walls of our tent, mingled with the trill of the crickets, the hoot of distant night birds hidden in the trees. Though I knew where we were, what lay beyond the safe haven of our small home; though the weight of a long day of healing death was quick to return to my limbs, it did not quite stir the peace between us. I had him, like this, soft and pure and unblemished like the first time I’d seen him, the first time I’d kissed him, the first time I’d laid with him. No one could take this from me. From us.

“Patroclus,” Achilles sighed sleepily, nuzzling into the hollow of my throat, arms coming around me to hold me close.

Yes, I thought. I knew well what he meant, when he said my name like this.

“Achilles,” I whispered in return, and closed my eyes.

Thank you so much for reading! Likes and reblogs are greatly appreciated :) If you enjoyed this one-shot, I’d love to hear your thoughts. Have a great day! <3

#the song of achilles #tsoa #Patrochilles Week 2021 #patrochilles #patroclus #achilles #patroclus x achilles #patroclus/achilles #achilles x patroclus #tsoa fanfic #achilles/ patroclus #johaerys writes

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vendettaparker · 2 years

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writer year in review: 2021

hi! i got tagged in this by @venomsilk and omg. she’s such an inspiration. i love her so much. so much talent and creativity in this amazing person. this year wouldn’t have been the same without her 💗

first creation and most recent creation of 2021

my first fic was written on january 5th! it’s the name, and it’s a peter parker blurb. i read a lot of fics on here starting in like october 2020, and all the amazing writers on here led to my inspiration and fueled my need to write. before this i’ve never written this much before, especially creative writing. honestly i didn’t think i’d be any good or i’d like it that much. but this has evolved into my favorite past times. and i have all my amazing mutuals and followers to thank 💗

one of your favorite creations from 2021

no time to die is definitely my fav i wrote and i go back and reread it sometimes bc of how much i enjoy it. i also like how many layers i was able to give the characters in it.

a creation you’re really proud of

i’m super proud of where we rot since it was the first series i was able to complete and i felt like it was cohesive enough to be good.

a new style you tried this year and a fic that uses it

smaus! most of my smaus are for peter so they are all on his masterlist. but punishments has a special place in my heart.

a creation that took you forever

where we rot, purely bc it was a series. my oneshot and blurbs i could write in one sitting

your creation from 2021 that received the most notes

i’m pretty sure it’s my peter smau, squirt. that was rough bc my notifications went off so much on that one that i had to turn them off just for that post bc of how many times people would ask “why are you getting notifications to squirt??”

a creation you think deserved more notes

i think the glitch was super underrated, but i did post it in the middle of where we rot updates, so i know a lot of people were looking for that rather than one shots.

a new fandom you joined and a creation you made for it

none :/ i’m a one fandom whore

a creation you made that breaks your heart

dancing with your ghost, which is also something that i think is a little underrated. but i write it very early on in my writing. it’s based off the song and now every time i hear that song i think of losing peter and it makes me sad :(

a ‘simple’ creation that you really love

this blurb about you and tom gossiping. it’s just so cute and domestic and it’s all fluff, which is rare for me :)

a favorite creation created by someone else

it’s a little unfair bc i have hundreds of fics i’m in love with. the only fair thing to say is to go look at my fic recs on my masterlist in my bio :) but also sweetest kill by @silkscream is so hot and i love it.

some of your favorite content creators from the year

ALL OF MY MOOTS (also see my fic recs list :))

the best part of 2021 was definitely being able to write you guys. it may be a little sad… but this is my safe space. i feel happy and understood here, and without this space to express myself, i don’t think i would have enjoyed 2021 as much as i did.

#love you all so so so much

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lesserfandomappreciation · 3 years

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Is that Supa Strikers show really that great? Would I like it even if I don’t like soccer/football? (I’m asking because I’ve never seen it. In fact, your posts are the only reason I know it exists at all.)

Okay. Okay, okay I was going to work on requests during this meeting but then I saw this and I have many feelings on this show so you're getting an essay. Buckle up son. Brief History

For those not in the know, Supa Strikas is a series from South Africa that started as a futbol-themed comic in I want to say the early 2000s. It quickly gained popularity throughout most of Africa and today is published in Latin-America, South America, Africa, some parts of Europe and Asia.

Almost every continent has this comic. You cannot tell me that isn't cool and also very telling of how many people like this series.

Seeing the comic get so popular so fast, a TV show followed up in 2009 by the same name and is still going to this day. This series has been along longer than most presidential terms.

The show had a similar story with only slight character changes, and while the entirety of the 2021 season is already out, there are signs that they may be more coming out in 2022 so. Fingers crossed!

What is it about?

The story centers around Shakes, a young futbol player who has recently joined the Supa Strikas, a team based in an unspecified African country. The comic follows the team winning the Super League during different seasons, going around the world to find out new techniques, deal with teams that cheat and overcome their own inner problems as well.

The series differs from the comics in that we don't see Shakes' journey to becoming a Supa Strika and we don't get the official names for the characters either, only their nicknames. Wikipedia has their official names listed I think, but if anyone whose read the comics wishes to tell me, by all means do so.

It's a pretty straight forward storyline, with some good story consistency (characters who appear in one episode do show up again and are given consistent writing). Very episodic.

Why should I watch the series?

The series is fun. Sincerely, un-apologetically fun.

The main characters get good screen time and we get to see some fun, decently written personalities that act off each other well. The Supa Strikas is a team of himbos but different varieties of himbos and I love them for it. You do get the feeling that this is a group of people that cares for each other, not a group of characters just shoved together because the series said so.

The side-characters are also great. Some of them are a little one-note but many of them are just as crazy, if not more fun, than the main characters of the show. There's an American dude named Ninja whose entire gimmick is that he's a reality star fame-seeking dude straight out of Las Vegas and I love him. He's one of the tamer character concepts.

Coach. That is all.

There's a vast array of diverse representation. While the Supa Strikas team is the only team is they only team of mixed nationalities (South African, Jamaican, Brazilian, Spanish, etc) every team is representing a different country. There's a Brazilian Team, a Mexican Team, a Saudi Arabian Team and many others.

In connection - the Supa Strikas have players from around the world. Dancing Rasta is Jamaican, the captain of the team, an incredibly competent leader and very down-to-earth. You do have players that are a little stereotypical (North Shaw is an Australian who loves extreme sports, shocker) but are written in ways that you find yourself not minding.

It's funny. There's a lot of good moments both in writing and in the animation. As someone who got to study animation, I can say without a shadow of doubt that the team behind the character animations had no fear in pushing what they can do and making the characters feel fun.

Some of the stereotypes used in the show are used well and are written in a fairly respectful way. El Matador, a Spanish player, fills the stereotype of being a self-absorbed Spaniard. but he's also written to care for friends and to be very competent in other areas. Plus, there are other Spanish characters like Riano that are nothing like that and have distinctly different personalities. As a Spaniard, I found this to be a good writing choice. These jokes are seen less as insults and more like friendly barbs between most countries and it doesn't detract from the show.

The technology. It's a running gag that the tech used to train the guys is progressively more outrageous.

No forced romance storylines! There's no character moment where boy meets girl and then we're stuck watching this inevitable couple find reasons to not be a couple. It's nice to not have the forced hetero-normative relationships we see in a lot of other shows.

To that end, fantastic healthy male friendships! There's no "no homo" moment and the characters all have very good chemistry. Again, you feel like they're actually friends. They all have different dynamics too, so the friendships don't feel uniform and stale.

Good emotional moments.

Bromances for the win! Genuinely shocked there's not more fandom for it considering the sheer quantity of POSSIBILITIES of bromances and potential ships to work with.

It's 100% fine if you don't know anything about futbol. The show shows literally what matters, not every single little throw-in, and most times there's some world-breaking nonsense going on that distracts from that. There's literally an episode where the opposing team changes gravity on the the field to try and beat the Supa Strikas, the rules barely matter. I promise you, you don't need to know what "Offsides" means in order to watch.

The commentators. I love them both.

The episodes are varied in stories. There's ones about training, ones about exploring a different country, others where the opponents cheat, etc. There's an episode which is almost a murder mystery and I love it.

All the episodes can be found free online on Youtube on the official channel for the show. I love this creative team so much.

There's a lot of good writing choices!

What might I not like about the show?

Some people like episodic shows, some don't. For those in the latter category this may drive them away from Supa Strikas.

There's like. 4 female characters. I can see why they did that, but I can also see why that is upsetting (speaking as a woman who is very tired of the Smurfette principle). The humor may not be for everyone. That's more based on personality, because I think there's something for everyone, but there are jokes that I recognize fall quite flat.

In connection to that, the stereotypes. Like I mentioned earlier, the show utilizes and breaks some stereotypes very well. There's a character (Spenza) who is written to be the chubby comic relief that is also 9/10 times the guy who saves LITERALLY EVERYONE from trouble and gets recognized for it, for example. However, the entire Japanese team is a karate-based team with a Coach named Ura Giri who wears Chinese clothes despite being Japanese. The German team is just a military branch and, while funny, might be offensive depending on which German you ask. It can be detracting from the show.

There's some bad writing choices that can be rough, but they are episode centric.

What should I do?

Watch the show. Give it 2-3 episodes and if it doesn't grab you, okay! You tried! If it does, welcome! it's literally for free on youtube, Seasons 1 through the last number I can't remember. I watch it when I'm working on something because it's fun and gets me to laugh, you might watch it with a bowl of popcorn. Just do your own thing!

If you do like it though, come back, hit me up with talks and questions about it. Besides multydoodles I haven't found a lot of people who really are into it so come! Join us! One of us!

Hope this mini-essay helped out and that the show works out for you!

#Supa strikas #supa strikas fans unite!

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wexhappyxfew · 3 years

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The Nightingales of Fortune Favors the Brave

A Band of Brothers Fanfic Coming Fall 2021 (or presumably whenever Landslide finishes up!)

HELLO!! If you’re reading this, then as you can see, I’ve finally created a master post with all my Nightingales (well, not really mine THE PUBLIC’S but you’ve all gifted them to me ever so graciously, and it honestly, it means the world to me). Just to see the excitement and reception I’ve gotten from so many people in the fandom involving a female group of Pathfinders - an area of war, I have wanted to cover ever since nearly over 2 years ago I got involved in the fandom. All OC’s will have their creators name listed beside them - I did not create any of these OC’s, all credit goes to the lovely people who crafted and gifted them to me for FFTB!

Viewing where I currently am in my life, I’m going to going to college this year! I got accepted into the school I wanted, the program I wanted, even a scholarship! And I’m beyond excited. I really wanted to have something there for me when college does finally, you know, HAPPEN, and so Fortune Favors the Brave was the only way to go! To have a wonderful group of Nightingales, of female Pathfinders in the Band of Brothers fandom, seemed to be the way to go. Updates and such will definitely be different - I’m picking up more work hours this year, probably even summer classes, night classes, weekend classes - whatever I can do to benefit my degree and myself, I’m taking the opportunity.

And so, updates will presumably be quite different, depending on a variety of things, but...this will be my college story! No matter how many years it takes to complete and update and write, this will be the thing I have with me through it all for when I need a mental break from school! And I am beyond excited for when I do finally get to share this story more than anything!

We have such a great group of OCs here - different backgrounds, different reasons for joining, different creators who gifted them to me, different friendships, relationships and abundances of sisterhood and brotherhood moments. I’m truly beyond excited to showcase the Pathfinders side of the war in the light of 16 female OCs, whose stories will be told through their viewpoints based on different episodes whether whole or split!

So thank you ALL!! These past 2 years have been a joy in the fandom and let’s hope for another few more! I’ve managed 3 fics and 4 books total and I’m excited to bring, presumably, my FINAL Band of Brothers fic in the fandom to you all in the near future. Thank you!! <3

THE NIGHTINGALES

Team C DZ C for 506th PIR, 501st PIR

-> 2/506 PIR (Stick 2/Plane #4)

-- TOCCOA VETERANS --

Team Leader

Captain Eleanor Graham - @basilone

Eleanor Graham had never met a challenge she couldn’t conquer - the eldest of four and a farmer’s daughter, teamwork and diligence were drilled into her mind like clockwork, along with being as much of a leader in the eyes of her family as she could. There was more to life than a farmer’s wife for her future though, no matter how much she adored the farm her family had grown to craft from the ground up. Iowa brought no opportunity except the farm life deemed fit for her, so upon seeing the advertisement “ It’s Your Fight Too “, OCS had never seemed like a better choice in her eyes. Because it was all their fights - man, woman, child, anyone - it was a World War, a fight for all their lives, for human lives. And with the capability to obtain Captain just before leaving for Camp Toccoa, it solidified her position for not only leading in Easy Company, but leading the Nightinagles - the first stick of female Pathfinders.

Assistant Team Leader

Lieutenant Florence Godfrey - @pxpeyewynn

A British lady and an artist at heart, from the little town of Avebury, set inside Wiltshire of Great Britain, her father made it big in New York just as the war that swarmed throughout Europe, erupted into spitfire. And suddenly thrust into the world of an America before war, was unsettling. Her country fought while America remained neutral. Yet, when the advertisement flooded throughout New York City - she couldn’t help but take it as her only way to get into war. OCS was beyond enough challenges, but walking in as a Lieutenant for Easy and for the Pathfinders, she was no longer the little girl who prayed at night to whomever was above to end the people’s suffering, or avoided interaction to instead draw in her notebook. She was a Lieutenant, and she was a woman at war - yet what was she even fighting for?

Eureka Operators (each equipped with a Eureka Transponder each)

Sergeant (NCO) Marie Reynal - @thoughpoppiesblow

Grandmère Reynal always held her at night, under the dark night sky and sang in her soulful Cajun French, the words flowing from her lips and remaining an ever-present comfort in times where food was hardly ever on the table, or when she had to watch the other girls at school get the latest Mary-Janes and she was stuck with her old ones. Her grandmère taught her to appreciate the small things in life. But when the “It’s Your Fight Too” poster came out in the papers, Marie Reynal knew there were larger things in life than the newest Mary-Janes at school. Packing up what she could, Marie headed out to Camp Toccoa, equipped with nothing but some clothes and her fiddle.

Corporal Edith Lockner - @mercurygray

Remember to look up - her mother would always tell her that. Especially when things on their little farm got hard in Stanford, Illinois where the only thing that occurred there was the wagering price of corn that fluctuated with the ever-changing times. So...she figured that’s why she always tended to look to the stars when her mother would tell her that before bed each night, looking out the wooden window under her quilt as a cold draft blew in. She always imagined herself up there, amongst the stars and for once seeing what the stars saw. But to be up with those stars and to get to study them, she’d need a lot more money than what ever amount the corn tended to bring in. And the Airborne with a fantastic pay grade, along with the Pathfinders and their earnings -- it seemed her ticket out. Maybe there won’t be stars - but anything’s got to be better than here.

Wireman

Corporal Chiyoko ‘Luna’ Omori - @papersergeant-pencilsoldier

Know your place. Eyes down, mouth shut. And most importantly, honor your family. Chiyoko Omori has never been one to step out of line, nor has she been one to speak when otherwise not spoken too. Trained in the art of kendo, the Japanese martial arts that her ancestors trained in, she leads with discipline and integrity amongst the group of Nightingales training as Pathfinders, as the solo wireman of the group. Her intelligence, more than once, has saved her and in war might just save her again and again. Her father’s garage had always been home to a multitude of repairs and many she had learned to do herself. But there she had been Chiyoko. But for war, she must forget who Chiyoko is and embody the only other name besides her family name that she will ever know - Luna.

Lightmen (each equipped with 2 Halophane Lamps each)

Staff-Sergeant (Senior NonCom) Sarah Prowse - @junojelli

For once in her life Sarah Prowse would not have her twin brother by her side. He hadn’t been by her side for years after he went back home to fight with the English and lost his life at Dunkirk. But this was real, this was happening - and the Pathfinders withheld the opportunity to prove to herself that Edmund had died with valor and courage. And he would not have died in vain. The nannies had always said they were inseparable but they weren’t those kids anymore. This was real life. And in real life, there was love and loss and pain. And sometimes the only way to get through it all was to do the thing to distract you most from it all. Some days she wished her family could’ve just stayed in England - maybe Mum would still be here. With her sharp mind, and the ability to read people like an open book, rising to the rank Staff-Sergeant had come easily - reading the field and reading people were pretty similar...right?

Corporal Jean Dawson - @tvserie-s-world

Life in Louisville, Kentucky had always been a sort of cozy-comfort that Jean Doxon had always enjoyed. The weekend fairgrounds filled to the brim with people enjoying the night life it offered, early summers filled with watching her father race horses around the tracks sprinkled throughout the town and nights by her boyfriend, Glenn Hartley, where the sky seemed to stretch forever into the night. That is before the war sent him away to the Pacific. And their only form of communication was reduced to letters, with pressed flowers and the hint of rose perfume. Jean refused to mope about, when she knew this war was hardly far from over. Quick-thinking on her feet, and a town champion for knot-tying in her days in elementary, she packed what she could and left for Georgia the second she was able to take the first train out. The Airborne had much to offer, but more importantly so did the Pathfinders.

Corporal Mercy Codonoa - @whoahersheybars

Mercy Codona always been a traveler, never staying in one place and always on the move to somewhere new that she might've never quite been before. This meant new neighbors, new friends and a new way of life. Something the United States readily offered. Each new town in a new state had a different way of life than the next. She figured that's why she was so quick to adapt to her surroundings - nothing was ever permanent, nor set in stone. Neither was family. Orphaned by 17 and left to fend for herself, left in the care of her mother's estranged sister, Mercy took the liberty by herself to do what she could to support herself. Taking up odd jobs in each town she traveled to and managing what she could to feed herself. But she was proud of her Romani-Croat heritage and what her ancestors had done in their past lives. She intended on continuing what their stories had not finished. If only she could continue to support herself. It was only when the "It's Your Fight Too" showed up newly on the Fort Wayne clipboard by the post office in April 1942 and then and there in that moment did she decided - with the extra money the Airborne offered, along with that of the Pathfinders, she'd be able to support herself in the future as well as possibly find people with the same dreams as herself for their futures, and for once finally belong.

Private Kennedy Rutlidge - MINE

Kennedy Docherty had always had quite a wild and exciting mind, always having a new idea, or a new method on selling the most recent paper that got her a few cents an hour. All through her schooling years and even up to her senior year, she took to the busiest corner on Lake Ave and Lyell Ave, calling out to sell her papers, before heading home for the night and running her normal routine the very next day. She spent summers at Lake Ontario, in her grandmother's home on the lake, where some of her fondest memories of her youth had been born. She always believed that's why she was always fascinated with flying, like one of the birds or hawks that flew out across the lake in the early morning. What she'd give to get that feeling just once in her life, away from school and away from the constant need to make as much money as she could to help with the family. The words "It's Your Fight Too" scrawled across the paper in early April had caught her eye within a second and left her running home just that night to break the news that she was signing up. And almost a week later, she found herself packed on a train towards Camp Toccoa, Georgia, bright eyes and the last bit of innocence fading from sight.

Security Personnel

Sergeant (NCO) Alexandra Calypso - @iilovemusic12us

A Boston girl who grew up with her proud Jewish faith, with a Greek mother, knew hard work and sometimes it was pushing yourself to the very limit beyond what the human body could handle sometimes. So that meant falling, scrapping your knee a few times, sucking up the tears, sending a quick prayer to God and moving on with your life. Life had always been like that - they weren’t the richest, nor the poorest, but there wasn’t ever enough food on the table or enough money to fix the roof, or even to keep the mortgage paid. But her parents never stopped working. And she supposed what drove her to the Airborne and to the Pathfinders was seeing how hard they worked. And they paid well she had heard. She could work with it. And if anything, the Pathfinders were more accepting than any school in Boston she’d been to.

Sergeant Nellie Shaw - @hellitwasyoufirstsergeant

Hailing from a small, coastal town in Maine, the proud Scot wanted more than anything to stay out of war when it finally came knocking on America’s doorstep. But Nellie Shaw, loyal as saint, knew that there was one thing she could do for this country and that was fight. Give her a pack of cigarettes or a bottle of gin, and she’d go in swinging for the war effort, even with her grumpy morning attitude that slowly became infamous in her elementary school days among the school children. She had no purpose on a farm on a mountain side anymore, rather destined to do what part of the fight she could. Taking Greer Riddell under her wing, the fellow Scot befriended the least likely person to enjoy her company and yet Nellie’s easy-going companionship slowly became integral to the entirety of Easy Company and the Nightingales.

Private Greer Riddell - @leighinthesky

Schruz, Nevada was home for 21 years and by the looks of it, home for the rest of her life. A bee farm in a tiny town wasn’t idle for the rest of her life, but if she never got the money for college to get out of the small town, she feared she wouldn’t ever leave. And knowing the military had offered 16 women a stick of a plane to get their shot at becoming Pathfinders for the Army was her ticket straight to Toccoa, Georgia for training. The pay could send her not only to college, but could get her out of that tiny town which had confined her to nothing but her family and a cute little bee farm where hard work always paid off. Don’t be fooled by her subdue and withdrawn nature, the second her hands touched the rifle - the field was hers and yet so was the valley.

Codebreaker [Betchley Park Member]

Sergeant Laverne Robinson - @vintagelavenderskies

For her 23 years of life, Laverne Robinson had known just about every spot in London where you could catch a smoke break and not get caught by one of the older women and get scolded for doing so. She blamed her older brother, he blamed her. It was a mutual thing. But that had been the only thing to fear in London - until war struck, which sent every eligible man off to fight for the effort. Her brother included, leaving her staring out the rain speckled window all alone as the smell of her mother's soup wafted past her nose. Yet, like many women of the time, she wanted to fight too. Fluent in French and German and skilled in mathematics and code-work, Bletchley Park seemed the best fit. Working on codes, both sculpting and breaking them inside the building, keeping her lips shut and going on about her normal day when not inside the institution, life didn't seem as dreary as she had anticipated. Because she knew she was apart of the effort to end this war. That was until, she was called upon in late March 1944 to join up with the 101st Airborne with the first female stick of 12 pathfinders to make the jump into Normandy and assist them in anyway possible. Laverne knew it was a once in a lifetime opportunity and if her brother were there, he would've told her to run with it. Becoming a professor of mathematics would have to wait.

REPLACEMENTS

Corporal Alessandra Lisi - @tvserie-s-world

Alessandra Lisi had never known her parents. She was always told that sickness had taken them when she was just a child. Her brothers had been older than her and had tried to protect her from the sight of her parents dying. And so when their Nonna had taken them into her home without hesitation, Alessandra grew to look to her Nonna as the other parental figure she’d ever had. Of course, her brothers were always there for her, protective as they were, they never let her get into any sort of trouble without hearing about it first. Alessandra grew to adore her Italian heritage, cooking with Nonna on Sunday’s, inviting family over to enjoy the meals and even getting to stir the sauce as Nonna dropped in fresh, cut tomatoes. That was life and it had always been life as such. But when war sent her 3 brothers away, she knew she would not go down without a fight either. Upon receiving the paper in November 1943, she noticed the cover page withheld the picture of 12 women, adorned in jump wings as well as military grade goggles and scarves standing with wide smiles and bright eyes in front of a C-47, the title 'The Nightingales', lying just underneath. Female Pathfinders. If her parents were here, they would've been telling her what Nonna would've been telling her now. Fight for what you believe in, because while there's life, there's hope.

Private First Class Bettie Smith - @sgtxliptons86

Brooklyn, New York had it all - the kids in the streets, the shops on the corners where you could get a piece of candy for as little as 5 cents, even the corner stores in the summer where you could get ice cream for a dime. And as Bettie Smith grew older, running the streets of Brooklyn became like a weekend job - checking in on the younger kids of friends, riding bikes past the floral shops and picking up flowers for her sister, getting a bag of charcoal for her father. Even throwing some curses towards the boys who would heckle her for the way she wore her hair or the old shoes laced on her feet. Her older sister wasn’t too pleased with it all, but ever since Ma had passed, she seemed to let it slide - it was an escape for Bettie. So when war came knocking on the Smith’s door, anger, yet pride for their country filled the home, as well as the streets of New York, as more men and women began signing up for the cause. More friends left to join the effort, leaving Bettie there on the concrete doorstep. So when Bettie received the daily paper in November 1943, showcasing the 12 female pathfinders of the 101st Airborne, front and center for all to see, Bettie took it in quite large strides and took the first train of December 1943 to Fort Benning, Georgia.

Private Annie Laine - @wereinadell

Annie Laine, the daughter of Finnish immigrants, had always dreamed of leaving the quiet countryside her parents had always preferred for their family for the big cities of the Midwest - maybe she’d go to Chicago and study theater, or maybe she’d go and finally attend college in Milwaukee. Anything to get out of the small town she currently resided in. But the countryside had brought alone its perks - orienteering and hunting were big in the Laine family and every child, her 3 brothers, her and her sister, had all been taught the noble art. Swimming the streams, fishing in the lakes, taking hikes through the forests and coming back with a deer for dinner - life had always been quite peaceful Annie felt. But she could always hope that one day it changed. And it seemed war rung those bells quite early on. Annie was tired of structured life and if anything, she knew that the start of structured life in the military would fall quite nearly to shambles once they hit war. The November 1943 issue of the daily newspaper brought upon not only sudden interest in the military, but in that of the female pathfinders who were paving their way in all of military history to be the first stick to jump into continental occupied-Europe. All it took was what cash she had saved for college and a small suitcase to get her on the way to Fort Benning, Georgia.

Private Marla Hughes - @hellitwasyoufirstsergeant

Lafayette, Louisiana had been home all her life - Baton Rouge just to the East and New Orleans just a little further. It had always been home for as long as she could remember. With the fancy parties her father always allotted for the family to attend, talking with the men in pristine suits, or the women with the big hats, some days Marla Hughes just wished to be able to go outside and enjoy nature instead of suffocating amongst the people who seemed to live in a world that didn’t even seem like real life. She supposed that was when she had hit her breaking point and joined the Airborne in Fort Benning, Georgia. She was tired of the life that did absolutely nothing for her. There was more to this world, so much more and yet she was confined to a party dress and an expensive glass of wine that tasted bitter when it rushed down the throat. There were small bars, where the music played, and you could dance until your feet grew tired, there were beer bottles awaiting to be clinked together with friends and there were people beside the stuck-up society she was forced into. The Airborne accepted anyone far and wide - and maybe she could strip of the posh life given to her and finally be set free.

THESE ARE THE NIGHTINGALES!!!

> if you have any questions, feel free to send them in! if not, it’s all good! these are our 16 nightingales! :) thank you to all of you who sent them in back in early December! It’s been an honor to craft these wonderful OC’s!

#band of brothers #fortune favors the brave #the nightingales #pathfinders #easy company #bob fic #band of brothers fandom #band of brothers oc #master list post

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