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zargsnake · 3 years

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Knightkiller: Anakin and Obi-Wan’s First Adventure

Chapter 9: Crix Spartak

Word Count: 2309 Links: Chapter 1, Table of Contents

* * *

Two Years Ago

Shmi sits at a desk by the windowsill in Watto’s shop, composing fake documentation for a shipment to a more legitimate planet. She used to do this kind of thing all the time for Gardulla on Nal Hutta, and she's very good at it. Forging and faking are probably her best skills. She knows legal-speak and formatting; she has a knack for coming up with random numbers and convincing names. When she has a sample of handwriting or writing style from a real person, she can imitate it flawlessly, which she has done for business leaders, crime lords, and even Senators. When she doesn't have anything from anyone real, she invents someone. She has no honest idea what the closest Senator's name really is, but she's invented a self-serious personality and a squiggly autograph that has tricked docking-receivers as far away as Rodia.

Watto has little use of this power of hers for his day-to-day needs, but he sometimes comes up with plots to trick his neighbors using Shmi’s forgeries. And, sometimes, like now, he needs her tricks to get rid of stuff, like these ten tons of toxic waste he ended up with from a bad bet, and that he now wants to pass off as fertilizer and sell to a gullible offworld farmer who won't be able to trace it back to him.

Writing isn't bad work. It’s challenging, and, malicious as it is, she knows she could enjoy it, if she let herself: getting into people's heads, living other lives, for just a short while. It is like solving a puzzle, to figure out how to make other people believe something that isn’t true. The cruel intention of the trickery is not her own, it never is, so she doesn't let that aspect of her work bother her, not anymore.

The only bad part, from her point of view, is the knowledge that her words get to go somewhere that she does not.

And the only good part, really, is that she gets to look at her little boy as she writes. He sits on the desk, next to her cobbled-together, whirring word-processor. He is carefully cleaning a fragile hyper-carburetor with a rag, putrid green gear-soap, and a very serious expression.

Suddenly Crix Spartak pokes head through the window: “Skywalkers!”

“Crix!!” Anakin nearly drops the carb, but of course his reflexes are too fast. He spins around on the desk and grins at the gladiator.

Crix leans on the windowsill -- then lifts his arm quickly from the heated clay, and leans just one calloused elbow on the sill. “Good morning, Ani.” He reaches across and tussles his hair. The boy nearly glows with happiness.

Shmi raises her eyebrows at the man her son admires so much. “Good morning, Crix. Can we help you?”

“D’you wanna go for a spin on the old speeder?”

“YES,” answers Anakin.

“We have a lot of work to do. Not all of us have 6 free days out of 7,” answers Shmi.

“I don't have any work, Mom!”

“I can think of one or two things for you,” she tells him.

“Just a loop round the block, Shmi? You'll be back in a minute.” Crix rests his head on his hand and smiles at her, looking just like a puppy.

She looks at him with a very deliberate expression. “I can't.”

“Take me!” says Anakin, heedlessly.

“Ani! You need to stay with me while I work. I don't want you zooming around, testing the limit on your tracker-bomb.”

“I've calculated for that,” says Crix. “Your tracker-bombs are the same as mine. The loop I planned wouldn't go anywhere near the limit.”

“Please, Mom? I'll work twice as hard.”

“No need for that.”

“I'll bring him back in ten minutes.” Shmi does not look convinced. “Five minutes.”

“Please?” Anakin begs again.

“Ten minutes,” she concedes.

Anakin sets the half-cleaned carb down, crawls off the desk, moves the carb onto a shelf, and climbs back onto the desk and over the word-processor into Crix’s arms.

“I'll bring him right back to you,” says Crix.

“If you don't, I will kill you,” says Shmi.

“I'm more afraid of you than any gladiator alive!” he tells her, laughing.

“Good! You should be!”

“Is that YOUR speeder?!” Anakin interrupts them.

“Yup! -- Well. Not really. But I won it, anyway.”

“It's BEAUTIFUL!”

“Ani!” Her son looks at her. “Keep it down.”

“Sorry!”

“Have fun.”

“I will!”

Crix grins at her, drops a big yellow flower on her desk, and points at it. She rolls her eyes and he blushes and carries Anakin to the speeder to drive him around. Shmi can't compose at all without her little muse at her side. She sits there, worrying, as they drive somewhere out of sight. A minute passes, and she picks up the flower. She doesn't recognize it. It must be an import. He must have won this, too.

They return in just eight minutes.

* * *

One Year Ago

Anakin is not supposed to be in the audience of the death match. No one wants him here, not his master, not his mother, not even Crix himself.

But he just had to come. Everyone is talking about it. He’s never known anyone so talked-about, so famous. He feels so proud. Crix is like family. And everyone, all over town, is raving about him, how unstoppable he is, what a bloody, powerful killer he is. And now Crix’s master has rounded up a spectacular squad from faraway worlds, incredible people who are paying huge amounts for the chance to fight him, to fight Crix, to fight his mom’s cool boyfriend.

They say there’s monster-men, like Wookiees, and there’s even a Mando, whatever that means. Everyone is saying they’re crazy. Everyone is saying all his opponents are gonna die, shot by Crix’s bespoke mega-blaster or crushed in Crix’s bare fists. Anakin can picture it, but he can’t really believe it; he has only ever seen those hands used for good. It'll be Crix’s grandest fight yet, maybe even the grandest fight that's ever happened in the universe. No one can keep Anakin away from such a prospect!

He has an average amount of chores, but he sets his droids on them. His newest and, by far, most ambitious droid, C-3PO, isn't much for cleaning or repairing, yet, but he can speak, a little, and write, a little more. His mom bought Anakin a fairy-tale book and assigned him to copy out the letters to improve his handwriting. Anakin sets Threepio on the task instead, and hopes that his mom won't be able to tell.

He does feel guilty, but he's too excited to feel that guilty. He sneaks out without telling her. There was a sandstorm this morning; fortunately it has passed, but the leftover wind keeps kicking sand into the air.

The arena is in a different neighborhood than the slave houses. Anakin lifts up the tarp of a delivery truck and hides in there to hitch a ride. To his surprise, the truck is full of gross little creatures called gizka. They crowd around him and rub their big faces on his legs. He pulls one onto his lap and pets its soft horns and noses.

“I wonder why they're taking you to the arena? ... Oh, I bet the gladiators are gonna slaughter you.”

He finds it kind of funny, in a sad way, that these little animals are so cheerful; that their doom is close, and they have no idea. He pretends his hand is a sword and chops it on their heads, making them coo and squawk. He laughs.

Once he hears a crowd outside, he sneaks out of the truck and hides among the people. He is far from the only urchin running around, but he does not pick pockets. His mom forbids it, and they wouldn't be allowed to keep the money, anyway.

He follows the other children and soon finds the hole in the arena’s wall which they use to sneak in and out. He fits inside the thin crack without too much difficulty, and flits around the dirty, dark area behind the stadium seating. He finds a spot with a good view, between the legs of some pink-skinned person. He leans on the bench and rests his head on his arms, and watches the battles with wide eyes.

He almost doesn't recognize Crix, in a ridiculous helmet with a big feather, but the nasty red scar across his shirtless torso gives his identity away. He's touched that scar; it feels rough and scratchy.

Crix is more than just a killer; he is a performer. He yells and growls and taunts; he makes obscene gestures and even takes bites out of his opponents, both animals and people. Anakin feels shocked and uncomfortable to see him this way, but it does not lessen his affection for him. It only increases his amazement, that one person could contain two such different personalities.

Just as the pilots and farmers had predicted, Crix wins every battle with ease. His main strategy involves shooting to stun, weaken, and disarm his opponents, and then taking them down with glamorous, bloodthirsty wrestling moves. Anakin has never seen such gratuitous and extended violence before, though he has seen plenty of people die, from podrace explosions to mechanical accidents. Until today, the bloodiest thing he ever saw was someone's tracker-bomb explode their head, but some of these deaths far surpass that one. When he starts to feel dizzy, he looks away and takes deep breaths, but he is too invested to look away for long.

Something about all this murder makes him feel cold. But it isn't a real cold. And it isn't nearly as bothersome as this heat or this wind. He rests his sweaty forehead on his arms and swallows his own spit, but it is a weak comfort. The bench shakes under his arms as the audience bangs their feet on it. Anakin marvels at their energy. He wishes he was having as much fun as they are. He really is trying to enjoy himself, and he sort of is. The thrill of it all is similar to podracing, and the triumphs are satisfying. He supposes he will grow into liking it.

After forty minutes of this action, the host announces the next opponent -- the Mando, Chahlee Tiango. Anakin watches the helmeted warrior posture and pose as the audience frantically cheers and boos.

The little boy is starting to feel bored. This would be much more exciting if they were flying around on fast ships, not shooting and punching each other. The only real difference anymore is the color of the blood. But Chahlee looks like a human, meaning he'll just bleed red, which isn't anything new.

Anakin looks at Crix, whose helmet cracked in half in the last battle. Now that his face is visible, Anakin can enjoy his confident smile. He wishes his mom were here to see her boyfriend winning so much. He supposes she would hate it.

As Anakin's thoughts wander, the audience jumps to its feet and screams uproariously. Anakin fastens his eyes back on the battle.

Crix was shot right in the chest. He crumples. A wave of sand lifts from the ground and nearly covers him, like a blanket, hiding him, as if he were never there. Tiango takes a gleeful lap around the arena.

The audience is screaming far too loudly to hear anything from the announcer. The bench is shaking too much to remain a suitable armrest. Anakin stands up straight and stares ahead.

The pink legs that had framed Anakin's view now jump and move around with everyone else, obscuring the arena with cloaks and pants and boots. The other children in this hideaway start moving around, their own views also disrupted, trying to find better spots. Some of them move in front of Anakin. He lets them. He backs off further into the shade.

“Crix…” His initial shock starts to wear away, and he feels tears cross his parched face. “You were supposed to win! They all said you would!”

He had to lose eventually. No one can win every time. Mom told me he would lose, sooner or later. Everyone dies. It's okay.

It really doesn't feel okay. But this feels like podracing, too. Failing. Losing the game. He has been close to death himself a few times, especially when Sebulba is in the match.

He wipes his eyes and holds his fingers in his ears, which are popping from the terrifying decibel level of this audience. He squints his eyes and waits for the volume to settle and the people to sit back down.

What am I waiting for, though? They'll just continue with Tiango as the new champion. I don't want to watch that.

He makes a half-hearted attempt to get another good view, but one of the other children accidentally brushes up against him, and the feeling of being touched makes him deeply angry. He doesn’t trust these other kids. He doesn’t like them. They can’t understand. That wasn’t their friend who just died. It’s too loud here. And it isn’t going to get quiet. Not for a long time.

He worms out the crack in the arena wall and sees a truck that looks similar to the one he used to get here. He hides under the tarp again -- it is now empty inside. The truck jostles along, though it doesn't take exactly the same route back. It takes Anakin a little closer to home, but then it makes a turn he did not expect. He wonders if the truck will eventually come back around to the slave houses. He has no way of knowing. He fears it will wander out of range of his tracker-bomb. He jumps off the cart and walks the rest of the way home.

Chapter 10: Gafia Chumpi

#my story #my art #star wars #knightkiller: anakin and obi-wan's first adventure #shmi skywalker #anakin skywalker #crix spartak #chahlee tiango #scifi #action #cw violence #cw gore

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one-cd-at-a-time · 3 years

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One CD at a time

Don’t want to listen to me ramble on about CDs? I get it.... if you just want to listen go here: One-CD-at-a-time Playlist (but come back every so often -- I’ve got 1000s of CDs to get through)

I'm starting a project!

We have a-lot(!!) of CDs. We used to listen on fancy CD players and big speakers that looked like radiators or big black hengiform monuments in two corners of our living room but now the CDs have almost all been ripped and we listen to them off a hard drive. Bill suggested selling them all – and I’m usually the one who wants to clear things out of the house – but I don’t want to sell them. Sometimes it feels like they are bursting through the seams of our house – every spare shelf has a few CDs, there have been racks from IKEA and CD shelves from charity shops but they are never big enough and now they are all over the place. Some are in the UK, some are in the USA, some are in boxes, some in the garage, some in storage and I NEED to organize them (I’m not, but I really should have been, a librarian).

I’ve had visions of building bespoke shelves, card catalog drawers, a Dewey Decimal system – but how to categorize them? Besides, it just doesn’t seem fair to pick them up one by one and put them on a shelf or in a drawer – there are so many I haven’t listened to and they deserve to be listened to – I know I love some and some I am sure to hate but here goes….

These are my rules:

1. Pick up a CD at random

2. Once I select a CD, listen from start to finish.

3. Immediately after listening, I choose one song that I would add to a playlist and if Bill is with me – he chooses one. If we love them all, we still need to choose just one. If we hate them all – give the CD away?

4. I’ll keep a record of the favorites here which will form the basis for my own ‘playlist’. I’m also going to need to make some notes about each listening – no idea how long this will take but I’m thinking I need to be it in for the very long haul.

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kingofdirtandnothing · 4 years

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@polyfacetious big ass Christmas Drabble Extravagaza: Day Fifteen

Peter steps up to the door of the apartment, trying to juggle an arm load of jacket and briefcase, and he’s met with the smell of sweets just on the other side of the door. It’s the warm smell of something sugary, fresh from the oven, wafting in the space between the bottom of the door and the floor.

He shifts his briefcase to his other hand, wrestling his keys free from the pocket of his trousers. Just inside the door, there’s a small table with a bowl on it. The bowl was a wobbly, knobby thing made by one of Owen’s nieces in her pottery class. It has ‘I love you Uncle Owen’ painted around the width of it in a child’s uneven print. Keys and cell phone go in there, and his briefcase is placed underneath the bowl on the shelf designated for it beneath.

There was a place for everything, and everything needed to be put in its place. That was Owen’s doing. (Peter hadn’t exactly been a slob before they moved in together, but his home had never been this tidy. He’d been prone to throwing his jacket over the couch, his wallet and keys wherever they landed.)

The flat was smaller than Peter would like, just a single bedroom, a living space, a kitchen and a bathroom. But it was on a good street, and they could open their windows and listen to the sounds of the ocean nearby. It also was far more expensive than any flat Peter ever kept back in Edinburgh, and nearly half the size.

Owen deserved better, but it was a starting point. You had to get your foot in the door somewhere. The only way you could climb the ladder was by putting your feet on the ground and just getting to it.

Because Peter had a plan. He had a plan that included increasing his salary and his usefulness by at least five percent every year for Mr. Wingrave and his office. Executive Assistant paid better than most of the grunts down on the main floor, but it still wasn’t enough. There was a corner office just waiting for him, all Peter had to do was reach out and take it.

But none of this would be done overnight. Eight months into his plan and everything was on track, but it was hard not to feel frustrated that things weren’t going faster. Peter wanted to be able to buy the both of them the things they deserved. Rolex watches and bespoke suits and a Porsche or two.

Owen would look like a bloody dream behind the wheel of a Porsche. And Peter would give up an obscene amount of money to be able to fuck Owen in the backseat of a Porsche.

Peter slips his overcoat and his suit coat from his shoulders, shaking them out before hanging them on the back of the hook near the front door. He steps into the living room, and even from there, beyond the decent couch and the second hand coffee table, he can see the mess of mixing bowls stacked haphazardly at the edge of their counter space, a leaning mountain of metal and glass and whatever mixture he’d made in them spilled up against the sides.

(The kitchen was why Peter settled for this shoebox of an apartment. Because Owen hadn’t had a strong opinion about any of the places they’d looked at, he’d just shrugged and said he liked them, until he saw this one with its double oven and it’s kitchen island with a marble countertop. Then, he’d stopped and looked around and really taken the place in. So this one it was.)

It looked like Peter wasn’t the only one feeling the frustration today. “Tough day at the office?” He calls out coyly, stepping into the kitchen proper with a finger crooked into the knot of his tie to start working it loose from his throat.

Owen looks up from where he is hunched over a metal mixing bowl, the whisk in his hand still working furiously on the white cream beginning to stiffen in the bowl. Hand made whipped cream. Not a sad day, then. An angry one. Owen wasn’t one who got angry often, and he always took it out on food.

Over the last several months, Peter has learned to read Owen’s moods through the food. Things that were breaded or fried meant that he was looking for comfort. Baking meant he was anxious, and trying to do something with his hands. Sweets meant that he was pissed off. (Peter learned that the hard way, through his own fuck ups. And he learned to hate the taste of strawberry bon bons because of it.) Decadent things, French things, they meant that he was feeling amorous.

Peter fucking loved the days he came home to the likes of duck a l'orange or coq au vin. Those were the days he got to take his sweet lover into the bedroom and fuck him until he was hoarse and shaking with need, until he could peel away all those layers of goodness and kindness with blunt fingertips and sharp nails. Until all that was left was single minded, selfish need.

Owen was gorgeous at any time. There was something effortlessly handsome to him, where Peter felt like he couldn’t catch any eye without a nice suit and plenty of pomade. Owen was handsome in his natural state. And confident about it. There was none of that bullshit false modesty with him, and Peter loved him all the fucking more for it.

“Long day.” Owen huffs out a laugh, self aware enough to know what he looks like with his sweater sleeves pushed up over his elbows and his apron splattered with whipping cream. “That’s all.”

Peter is in a good enough mood that he’s not going to immediately call bullshit on that. So he steps forward instead, and he can see by the widening of Owen’s eyes that he knows what’s coming. “Oh, no. Don’t--come on.” That’s two fingers dipped right into the soft, fluffy whipping cream. “You’ll deflate my cream.”

Those two fingers are lifted to his mouth, and Peter makes a show of closing his lips around the knuckles, sucking them all the way into his mouth until they brush the back of his throat. Owen knew how far he could take things, both in the literal and metaphorical sense. It’s only when both digits are sucked clean, damn fresh whipped cream was lovely, that he speaks. “I’ll do more than that to your cream if you let me.”

Owen laughs, but there’s no denying how dark those already dark eyes are. “You’re a terrible influence, Peter Quint.” No truer words had ever been spoken about him. Peter has been the bad apple out of the bunch since he was in nursery school. After that many years, it did no good to try and run from these things. The truth was the truth.

“I don’t want to be ungrateful.” Owen puts the bowl down, wiping his palms clean on the front of his apron. It never took much pushing to get him to speak his mind. Especially in the privacy of his own kitchen. “I love my job. I love the people I work with, and Tony essentially gives me free reign, outside of his signature dishes.”

“But.” Peter supplies helpfully, already tugging on the long strand of Owen’s apron strings. The knot gives easily to his pressure and slips loose, leaving the blue and white striped fabric to hang loosely around his neck. When Owen doesn’t pick up the dropped line of conversation, Peter pulls the apron up and over his head. And as much as he wants to toss it on the floor, he hangs it on the hook.

A place for everything, and everything in its place. He knows, Owen.

“But it’s not the same. Being an employee with freedom isn’t the same as being your own boss.” Peter knew that chafing very well. Henry Wingrave was a good man. He was a kind man. But a good and kind man holding your leash was still someone with power over you. The dream, the real, honest to God dream, was to have no one holding his leash.

The dream, if Peter was feeling soft enough to put it into words, was to have that corner office. And to use the money from being his own boss to buy Owen his own restaurant. A place where he answered to no one, and the menu reflected whatever mood Owen wanted it to.

Owen nods, guilt written across the weight on his brow. Now, Peter can’t have that. So he does what any man in his position would do. He dips his finger right back into the whipping cream, and then smears a long path of white along Owen’s bottom lip.

“Oh no. Would you look at that. You’ve got a little…” Owen laughs, but it’s high and a little bit nervous, and Peter doesn’t know what he’ll do if he ever stops making Owen nervous. “You’ve been working so hard today. Let me take care of that for you.”

Kissing Owen is always sweet. But that creamy hint of sweetness as he parts the seam of Owen’s lips with his tongue runs right through Peter, giving him an idea. The kiss is slow, and deep, and Owen ends up pinned between Peter and the counter, and that’s right where Peter wants him.

“You look like a man who needs his mind taken off of his work, Mr. Sharma.” Peter’s fingers catch on the metal tab of Owen’s trouser zipper, and the sound of it being pulled down is loud in the quiet between them, punctuated by the breathy jesus that slips from Owen’s lips. “I’ll be more than happy to take care of that for you.”

Peter has no qualms playing Executive Assistant like this. He’d choke on his own tongue before he got on his knees for Henry Wingrave, but it’s as easy as breathing to sink down onto his knees on the tile floor of their kitchen, and watch Owen’s rapidly rising and falling chest through the smudged veil of his lashes.

“Peter-” His name always has weight, on Owen’s tongue. Sometimes it’s exasperated, sometimes it’s irritated. Often, it’s full of fondness. And sometimes, like this, it’s full of breathless wonder. And Peter would set his mother on fire to keep that shaky reverence in Owen’s voice.

“Hand me that bowl, would you?” The button to Owen’s trousers slips neatly from its hold beneath his thumb, and Owen’s brown trousers fold open like the petals of a flower opening up to the sun. His boxers beneath are soft and white, and still smell faintly of the soap they using for washing.

Owen hands the bowl down to him with shaking hands, and Peter stops him with the bowl still over his head. “Get a little.” It’s an order, no matter how quiet his voice is. Peter puts the bowl down on the floor next to his knees and takes hold of Owen’s wrist, feeling the wild thrumming of his pulse beneath his fingers.

“I always liked a little salt with my sweet.” Owen’s breath catches before Peter ever parts his lips to take Owen’s cream slick finger into his mouth, and the sound that leaves him when Peter’s tongue curls against the digit is explosive, like he’s been punched right in the gut.

Slowly, Peter licks every trace of sweetness away, until he’s left with the taste of Owen’s skin against the roof of his mouth. He suctions his cheeks in, keeping that pressure until Owen’s finger slips free from his lips with an obscene pop.

Peter grins, smug as the cat in the cream, and makes a pointed look between the bowl and the oh so tempting vee of Owen’s open trousers.

“Now...where else could I use this stuff on?”

#ch: peter quint #polyfacetious | owen #v: expats row #queued #carlota's christmas drabbles

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imagineclaireandjamie · 6 years

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Flood my Mornings: Found

I know, right??? Thank you for bearing with me while I’ve taken a wee ten month sabbatical! And thank you, too, for dropping in every now and again to remind me of how much you love this story. It means the world! - With love, Mod Bonnie

This story takes place in an AU where Jamie travels through the stones two years after Culloden and finds Claire and his child in 1950 Boston.

FMM Master List

Previously: Hectic

Found

Early December, 1952

“Hey, Mummy?”

“Yes, pumpkin?”

“Um! Why come—”

“How....”

“—How come my hairs is all gray in all tha’ pictures?”

One grammar victory at a time.

“Cameras only can show things in black and white. Ours, anyway.”

Taking pictures was always great fun; poring over them once they’d come back from the developer, a joy, particularly coupled with Jamie’s still-sharp wonder in their implicit magic. Actually following through with organizing them into albums, though? A bloody-hateful chore I’d managed to put off for nearly a year, this time. The red album already held Ian’s first six months or so, but most of his subsequent life had accumulated in lazy shoeboxes and (better late than never) now lay scattered around Bree and me in a shiny arc on the living room floor.

“Wouldn’t them—those pictures be better if it was all the right ones?” She popped up from hands and knees to shove a fistful of ginger curls toward me. “The good colors?”

“Absolutely! Maybe someday.”

She nodded once, satisfied. “You should go tell them to.”

“Tell who?”

Shrug. “Camera people.”

“I’ll write Mr. Kodak right away.”

“Good. Which picture’re we doin’ next?”

“Hmmm....” It came out more like a ‘heeeeeee’, since I was grinning with complete, albeit exhausted joy at my unstoppable eldest.

“How ‘bout THIS one?” She came up with a snapshot from the Fernacre Halloween party this year: Jamie beaming as he held Ian securely atop Kugel, one of the newer horses.

“Oh,” I moaned, heart squeezing as I held the photo next to the page showing Ian at four months, fuzzy-headed and drooling happily with his hands clapped together. “Bree, when did my tiny baby become a grown-up boy?”

“He izzzz a baby, Mummy.”

“Well, yes, but....”

But oh lord, to see his infant photos again, compared with the walking, sometimes-talking little man across the house! Where had all the baby fat gone? When had the generic softness of his features been replaced with cheekbones and Jamie’s dimpled chin?! Jesus H. Christ, it made me want to curl up and sob for days and then get down to business making another one. (Except, no, absolutely not).

“He IS a real baby,” Brianna was saying, with a sass that spilled over into guilty-glee: “He still poopies in his pants!”

“Touché, lovey,” I giggled along with her, rifling through our pile to make sure I hadn’t missed any from Ian’s birthday. “OH! This is pure Ian, right here, don’t you think??”

This was from just last week, from the packet Jamie had picked up on his way home yesterday. No special occasion: just our sweet, sweet boy standing in the doorway to the back garden, beaming with a magnetic smile even as he shyly resisted any coaxing to come out, blanket over his shoulder and pressed comfortingly against his cheek.

Somehow, he alone had managed to miss the gene for curly hair. His was still thick, though, brown and unruly as mine, with a tendency to poke up in little cowlicks every time you turned your back (and good bloody luck to anyone that tried to come at him with a comb and triggered a caterwauling to wake the dead). His eyes—dark honey—were slanted, seeming even more so as he grinned at the camera. So like Bree and yet so much his own.

Resemblance wasn’t the only difference between my little ones, for Ian was less tempestuous than Brianna, to say the very least. Whereas she had seemed to exit the very womb inclined to speak (or howl) her mind with a fierce, vocal confidence in herself, Ian Fraser was a more subtle charmer. He got what he wanted by lavishing snuggles and carefully-placed puppy-dog eyes on his target, speaking his few words when necessary, but usually content to wheedle in his own way, or else let Bree do the talking for him.

His own unique spirit, I marveled, running my thumbs against the glossed edges. Bree was, in a word, intense; her brother..... what? More shy by contrast, absolutely, but I’d always hated the milquetoast connotations of that word. He wasn’t at all skittish or morose; when in his element, he could be as boisterous as she, and if he sometimes preferred to play by himself in a group of friends, it always seemed to be by choice, not exclusion. In fact, I’d observed that he even spoke more when on his own, when he was absorbed in organizing a Gathering of the cuddly toys, or making tiny stick-villages in the garden, narrating his playtime in a mixture of English, Gaelic, and (the vast majority) Toddler. It was only when someone was watching that he would flash them a sheepish grin and start keeping his thoughts to himself.

No, see, Ian’s quieter nature bespoke something beneath it, something that always struck me as remarkably developed and complex for a child of his age. Cunning, I’d call it, or some deep, satisfied knowing—slyness, in the best way! His twinkling eyes often seemed to so, so sweetly say, ‘You can’t make me do what you want, Mummy, but I sure do enjoy watching you try!’ A strain of the MacKenzies, I thought, not for the first time.

“Hey-Mummy?” My little Fraser had her brows scrunched up as though contemplating murder, poring over the blue album from the shelf under the coffee table. “I dinna remember this pictures.”

“Those are of you as a baby,” I grinned, “so you were too small to remember.”

“Well....then...Da! He must—!” She nodded, full of budding conviction. “He remembers a whole, whole-lot, then, cause he’s really big!”

"Ah—” My lips hurt as little fizzles escaped from between them. “You’re not wrong, smudge.”

“Uh-huh, I know.”

She had flipped open to the middle of the album, to a series of snowy shots taken when she was...what...sixteen months old? We had gone sledding for the first time, and Ms. Byrd had captured the fleeting joy of it so perfectly. Little Bree’s jack-o-lantern teeth bared in glee above her muffler, the point of her elf-bonnet tickling my chin. My own hat had flown off into the wind, curls a blurry cloud above us.

She turned the pages to the left, going back in time. Cackles erupted at the images from her first birthday, elbows and eyebrows deep in chocolate cake, then she straightened gravely at the evidence of some of her exuberant early steps. “Was I walkin’ as good as Ian?” she dared me.

“Very well! Though he did start sooner.”

“Hey-Mummy?”

I inhaled through a secret, tired smile. Eighteen hundred times a day. At least. “Yes, Bree?”

“Hey-Mummy, where’s Da?”

“Putting Ian to bed.” I glanced at my watch. “Which means you, sweet pea, need to get your pajamas on, and—”

“NO, where is he in heee-rrrrre?” She lifted the album, glaring. “Where I was the baby?”

My jaw was open as though I’d started to say something. If only I knew what it might have been. Maybe then I’d know what came next.

“See-look,” she insisted, turning the thick pages of the other album and pointing emphatically.

Jamie, showing Ian around the house on the first day he’d come home with us .

Ian, in my arms in the hospital bed with Jamie at my shoulder, smiling down at us with Bree on his lap.

She thunked the album down, half on top of the other, contrasting the very first family photos I possessed: just the two of us, meeting one another in the morning light of that lonely, heavenly hospital room. “Where’s the Da-ones for me, Mummy?”

“Da…he...”

Damn it.

“....He wasn’t there when you were a baby.”

Brianna blinked twice, and her eyes went fierce as she cocked her head. “Wasn’t?”

“No. He wasn’t.”

“Why wasn’t he?”

“He was away at—at the war when you were born.”

Seeing the questions stacking up behind her eyes, I tried to explain, though my blood was thudding in my ears. “You know how Miss Della’s beau Peter is a soldier? And how he has to be away in Korea? That's like where Daddy was, too. He…” My voice cracked a little. “He was away, and didn’t get to meet you until you were Ian’s age.”

“Da was-not away!” Bree insisted, though her eyes were wide, unaccustomed doubt creeping in.

“He was, though, darling,” I whispered. “You don’t remember because you were still very little when he came back.”

I turned the pages slowly, past those scattered glimpses of our early days, when we were the Randalls, then the Beauchamps. “Da was—” Goddamn it, what was the bloody story? “—captured, and we were told he died.”

I thought she hadn’t heard me. I cleared my throat and started to repeat myself, more audibly this time, but I glanced down and my heart clenched so hard the tears broke through. For, my little warrior’s face had completely fallen to despair. “....Daddy died?”

“No! No, no, no, sweetheart, he didn’t, but he was….lost....for a long time.”

She sucked in a breath, almost a gasp, all trace of fierceness gone as she searched my face. “Was he scared?”

I could only nod, the tears stinging, squeezing the walls of my throat. “But, one day, he did come back. He found us and he got to meet you. His wee lassie. See?”

Jamie, on our second wedding day, so very thin in his suit, but glowing as he held little Bree in his arms, looking down at her with unrestrained, awestruck tenderness.

“You made him — make him — so happy, lovey,” I whispered, pulling her close onto my lap and against my heart as I turned the page.

The two of them, stretched out on this very couch, both their mouths open as they slept, her cheek smushed cozily against his chest.

I pressed my own cheek against her head. “He’d loved you the whole time he was lost. Getting to finally meet you was....” I flipped over to Ian’s first photos, pointing to Jamie. “Just like how happy he was here, when he met baby Ian for the first time.”

“Mummy....I dinna—” Her voice was choked, tears streaming as she whispered: “I dinna w-want Da to be lost when I w-was Ian.”

“Ohh, love, sweetheart, I—”

The door from the kitchen opened. “Alright, Bree, your turn for—”

“DA!”

By long instinct, he dropped to a crouch to let her run, sobbing, into his arms. “Christ, what's this, then, cub?” He rubbed her back, coaxing brightly to ease her worries, his expert skill. “Heyyy, lass, there, now.....Dinna be troubled so, wee love—tell me what’s amiss.”

She couldn’t say anything coherent at first, but at last, she choked it out. “I dinna want—y-you to b-be—lost again!”

“I’m no’ lost, Brianna,” he nearly laughed. “I’m here, see? Safe and—”

“Mu—Mummy said you were dead and l-lost when I was littlest and–I don't—dinna—w-want—you—to—ever— ”

“Och, no, lass,” he moaned at once as he pulled her tight against his chest and rose to his feet, his eyes meeting mine with an understanding that ached in us both as he saw the tracks of my own tears. “Never. Not ever.”

He swayed with her for a very long time as she sobbed into his shoulder. His eyes were closed and I could barely hear what he murmured into her hair:

“That was the saddest time of my whole life, mo chridhe....” In Gaelic: ‘I'll never be parted from ye again...nor your mother... nor Ian…...I swear it.’

“She’s truly growing up, then,” Jamie whispered, softly rubbing Brianna’s back where she lay curled up asleep on the sofa behind us. “That she can feel things so in her heart…..” He turned from her to lean fully against the bottom cushions, resting his arms on his knees. “It makes me want to weep, Sassenach. All the sadness that awaits them in the world....That I could keep all of it at bay.”

“Will we ever tell them differently?”

His head swiveled around, surprised. “Tell them what, mo ghraidh?”

“The truth.” The word was a ball of ice in my stomach. “About....everything. The stones... How we met. Who you really are.”

“I confess....I had assumed we never would tell them.”

“When it was only me and Bree, I had thought...well, it was a vague thought, only....but I assumed someday she would know. Now, though....it doesn’t seem as simple, somehow.”

“Aye.” His chest rose and fell heavily as he ran a hand backward through his hair. “In truth, ‘tis indeed a weight on my heart to think that they might never know all the dear memories—only the wee fragments, disguised as they must be.”

About Lallybroch. Jenny and Ian. All their little cousins. Murtagh. Brian and Ellen. Names the children knew, but only a surface-version; a bedtime story about people in a faraway land who were now lost; no more real than any other; far less so, with no photographs or brightly-colored illustrations to prove those people had existed.

Still more....might they never know what their father did for them at Culloden? Of the sacrifice and pain we both chose on that day?

“But we must bear it, no?” he was saying sadly, even as a half-hope grew in his eyes.

“How can they ever truly know us, Jamie,” I said, “understand us without knowing where we’ve been? What we’ve been through?” I thought of my own parents, shrouded in so much mystery, so much not known; unknowable, now.

“Perhaps...when they’re older? When they might be trusted to keep such a big secret, we might tell them. Though....” he considered. “They might both be fully grown before t’would be the right time for such a—"

“And yet, that’s the other side of the coin.” I hated this; scolded myself for being the devil’s advocate of cloying gloom. “It’s like adopted children that aren’t told until adulthood. If we wait so long, won’t they resent us for keeping such a monumental thing from them? The truth of who they are and how they came to exist?” My eyes must have looked as hopeless as Bree’s. “What do you think we should we do?”

A pause, then his mouth twitched in a weak attempt at a smile. “I wish I kent the certain path, Claire. I do.” Any light in his eyes ebbed. “In truth, we rob them — and ourselves, forbye — of something dear no matter the choice, aye?”

It might have lingered, the worry. It might have been a cloud over us throughout the fallen night. Instead, our eyes met and we softened in unison. He leaned his forehead against mine, pulling me closer to kiss my cheek. Many years stood between us and that day, should it ever even come.

I was about to rest my head on his shoulder, but a photo caught my eye, right there by my ankle.

It was barely in focus, fully half the image a diagonal, black nothingness, a childish finger covering the lens. Still, it had been captured at precisely the right moment, before Jamie or I had had time to react.

Both of us were in pajamas in front of the stove, my hair an absolute wreck (though, when was it not?), the cup of tea in my hand in serious danger of slopping over the side, since Jamie had me by the waist and was working to pull me close. His head was bent to my neck, his grin sweet and roguish, though his eyes were hidden. Mine were closed and my head was thrown back, as though no other damn thing in the world mattered but the moment’s silly joy.

I cradled it between us and spoke the simplest version of the ache within me.

“I’m so happy you’re not lost anymore.”

#;mod Bonnie #Flood my mornings #FMM Chapter 72

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swindlersstole · 4 years

Note

24 for your choice of pairing!!

if YOU get to have OC Hours then I ALSO get to have OC Hours, those are the rules (although mine are platonic hours)

24. “You’re the only one I trust to do this.”

“So... let me make sure I understand this.”

Chelan fidgeted rather obviously while Nova stared her down, hands locked in a flat steeple at his lips. It wasn’t his intent to scare her, not in the slightest, but the request she’d made of him was... trying, to say the least.

“You,” He pointed at her with both hands still flat together, “want me,” He gestured to himself, “to make you... a bunny suit.”

“...I mean, if you’re gonna put it like that,” Chelan mumbled, “yeah, that sounds completely bonkers.”

“That’s... you’re being very kind about it.” Perhaps Nova was just coming at this from several sour notes in his past regarding the costume, but it really felt like he was missing just as many links in this puzzle. “I don’t... mind, but I guess, just--why?”

“Well--you know what it’s like to idolize someone, don’t you?”

“I... yes?” There was so much to unpack in just that one sentence. “Are you saying you... looked up to a bunny girl?”

“Oh, not just one, a whole bunch!” Chelan’s bright green eyes lit up even brighter in excitement. “I grew up in a casino, remember? So I’ve been surrounded by bunny girls my whole life. I’ve always thought they were the most prettiest women I’ve ever seen! Just all this long, soft hair, and tight clothes, and perfect makeup, just--so glamorous. And tough, too! I never saw a cottontail without a smile, and they all handled angry customers like you wouldn’t believe, they didn’t take any lip! And they were always so sweet and kind to me...”

Her eyes wandered off skyward, and she held her face in her hands with a wistful smile. “They were just everything I wanted to be when I was little, this--just beautiful woman with so much charm and mystery and... pizzazz... who knew how to have fun but was always taken seriously, no matter what. What’s not to love, honestly!”

Hearing Chelan talk like that, it was hard for Nova to argue. Despite his own experiences, he supposed there were worse professions to idolize.

He couldn’t think of any, but the odds were in favor.

Chelan seemed to realize she’d rambled off, and jumped back to attention with a loud cough. “Um--’course, I understand that that... might be sort of hard for someone outside my bubble to follow. Especially someone that doesn’t like casinos all that much, but--”

“Wait, wait, what?” Nova cut in. “I like casinos just fine.”

“You do?” Chelan’s pigtails bounced with a perplexed tilt. “But Erik said they were pretty hit or miss with you.”

“No? I always thought I could hold my own in one. And I’ve visited your family’s casino a lot of times before...” He pondered about it for a moment, before snapping his fingers in realization. “Oh, you know what? It’s probably because I never want to go to Octagonia’s casino. Can’t stand that place.”

“Really? I heard it was pretty nice. What’s wrong with it?”

“It knows what it did.” And Nova said no more on the matter. “But, I guess to follow that up... you live and work in a casino, right? Can’t you just get a costume through work?”

“I... I could. In theory.” Chelan started to fidget again, gesturing her hands wildly like scales. “But we’d have to get it tailor made for me, and that means I’d have to talk to Daddy about it. I don’t think he’d have a problem with it, he gives all the girls the choice if they want to wear it or not, but it... it’s my daddy, y’know? It’s an embarrassing thing to ask for, and I’m not the most... poised in front of ornery patrons, and the suits can get a lot of bad attention. I don’t want him worrying about me.”

“You... wait. You wouldn’t be wearing this costume to work in?”

“Ohohoho, nnnnnnnope!” Chelan laughed just a few hairs short of maniacal on that one. “I’m no where near that confident! I’ll take this secret to the grave if I have to.”

“So... hold on. This is a secret bunny outfit that you’re gonna wear in private for confidence boosts. Is that... right?”

Chelan clapped her hands together once in elation. “Exactly! It’s a bespoke cottontail.”

“...Okay, fine.” This onion had far too many layers. It some ways, it was like looking into a highly specific mirror. Nova suspected he’d trigger a migraine if he thought too hard about it. “But if it’s a secret, why are you asking me for help?”

“Because you have the forge Daddy gave Erik when he helped Nana out.” And here, Chelan’s smile turned a bit wry. “And based on what Velvet down at the exchange counter told me, you also have the recipe for the outfit.”

That... was true, yes, he did still have that book. His deep-rooted need to find every recipe he could mixed with an unfortunate miscommunication of a request had led Nova to acquiring that book from the Maras Casino some time ago. How Chelan had deduced that and why it mattered eluded him, but the pained grin on her face told him she was going to explain why.

“Y’know--it’s kinda funny, I don’t actually get much time to play the slots in the casino myself? Have to work the tables, you know how it is.” She started. “But once we got that book on the shelf, I started using my breaks to get some rounds in and earn some extra tokens. I was gonna earn just enough, go exchange them for the book, and then run to the Builders’ Guild for a commission. Would’ve been totally discreet, and no one would have been the wiser.”

Nova had a sinking feeling he knew where this was going. “...and then?”

“And then!” Chelan’s voice was still cheerful, if not a small bit accusatory. “The day I get enough tokens, I run over to Velvet to get the book, and she tells me that a guy came in, just--blasted through the slots, took the recipe and was gone.”

“Oh.” Yep. Exactly as Nova had suspected. He wasn’t sure if he felt... guilty, or not, but he certainly felt awkward about it. “Uh... Sorry.”

“It--no, listen, you couldn’t have known, it’s just the cruel irony talking.”

Chelan paused to pinch the bridge of her nose, before shrugging her shoulders with a sigh. “Look--I know this is an inconvenience, you have a lot better things to do than make a cottontail costume for a friend of a friend. And, again! Super wild of me to be asking the Luminary for this particular favor, I know! But, the fact of the matter is... you’re the only one I trust to do this. You’re the only one I can trust! And I wouldn’t ask you to do it just because, I still have all the money I set aside for the commission, I’m more than happy and ready to pay you for this, so...!”

Her words trailed off, and without anything more meaningful to say, Chelan lowered herself in a pleading bow. “Please, um... please at least consider?”

This was far from the first time Nova had ever been asked to make something for someone, but it was the first time he’d ever been asked with such... fanfare? Disclaimer? He wasn’t sure what to call it, and he wasn’t sure he liked it regardless. There was nothing natural about people feeling indebted to him, and certainly not over something so (comparatively) minuscule. Luminary or not, one didn’t need a reason to help people, if they were able.

But if Chelan was anything like him (and he suspected that she might have been), then he knew he wasn’t going to make this happen without some manner of transaction. Though he could certainly make it more fair towards her. “Do you still have all the tokens from when you were going to buy the recipe?”

Chelan lifted up her head, bewildered by the question. “I--yeah?”

“Well, I don’t like the idea of taking money from a friend,” he shrugged, “so just give me the tokens, and I’d be happy to call that even.”

Her demeanor changed almost instantly, and she jolted back up, straight and narrow. “Are--are you serious? You’re sure?”

“Sure, I’m sure. I’ll get more use out of the tokens than the gold.” Nova smiled. “It’s probably all going right back to your casino, anyway.”

Chelan’s hands, curled into fists, started to tremble, but her pearly white smile betrayed her joy, and a barely restrained squeal later she’d jumped on Nova in the biggest, tightest hug she could manage. Which was actually very tight, Nova was sure he heard his back crack from the force--which in itself felt very similar to one of Jade’s hugs.

Oh, Goddess, he really hoped they didn’t have the same measurements.

“Oh my gosh, oh my gosh, thank you so much, I could kiss you right now! But I won’t! Because I’m pretty sure you’ve reserved that spot for Erik!”

“Is it too late to back out for that one?” Nova gasped out, but he was still grinning about it, so he’d accept that tease this time.

“No, because you really need to get on that. Zill wants to cater your wedding.” Chelan let Nova go when he started to sputter. “But, seriously, I mean it. Thank you--so, so much. I can’t even begin to explain how much this means to me.”

“Well... I won’t lie. I don’t really get it, myself. And I don’t think I can write it up as just being ‘a girl thing’, either.” And neither could Chelan, from the looks of it, as she nodded in agreement. “But if something’s important to you, then... it’s important to you, and that’s all that matters. I don’t have to understand it to respect it.”

The admission seemed to catch Chelan off-guard. “So--would you have done it even if I hadn’t said why?”

“I like forging things, and I like forging things for my friends. That’s all there is to it.” Nova answered simply. “’Course, I am glad you told me, though. Now I know I need to keep it a secret.”

“Ah ha... yeah, that... would have been bad.” She laughed quietly, bashfully. “Will you be able to keep it a secret? I guess if Erik knew it wouldn’t be the end of the world, I know he can keep his mouth shut, but...”

“If I forge at home, it’ll be fine. Only person that might find out is my mum, if you’re alright with that.”

“Well, if I can’t trust the Luminary’s mum, who can I trust, honestly?”

“Nobody, that’s who. I’d trust Mum over me any day.” It was his mum that taught him that valuable lesson in understanding others in the first place. Nova would have been remiss not to listen to her even here. “But, you have my silence. Give me a day or so to find all the materials, and I’ll come back to take your measurements. It’ll all be done before you know it.”

Chelan hummed in understanding, and then, silently, raised one hand to Nova, her pinky finger extended. “Promise?”

That level of earnestness and innocence from someone outside of Cobblestone surprised him, just a little, but Nova smiled and raised his own hand, linking his pinky around hers. “Promise.”

#panda does a write #oc hours #dq chelan #it strikes me now that chelan has a very dolly parton view on the bunny girl aesthetic and i think that is very good of her #also jade and chelan DO have the same measurements and nova is very tired #thechavanator

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eldritchsurveys · 5 years

Text

279.

What may we call you?: >> Mordred, or Rev, or Shadow, or whatever.

When can we send you a birthday card? (Figuratively, of course.): >> Today!

And, where are you calling from? (Again, figuratively.): >> Michigan.

What is your favorite Hostess/Little Debbie snack?: >> I can’t stand those.

Do you/your family buy loaf from the bakery or bagged on the shelf?: >> I buy bagged on the shelf, it’s just convenient.

White, wheat or other?: >> Other (multigrain or sourdough).

Have you ever fixed something without knowing just how you did it?: >> Probably, yeah. I’m like that with computers sometimes.

Do store brands actually taste the same?: >> Some do, most don’t.

Quick! Grab the closest book to you, open to page 5 and type the first line: >> There isn’t a book close to me right now.

What’s the last non-fiction book you’ve read? (Not a school textbook!): >> How To Change Your Mind by Michael Pollan. A deeply fascinating and inspiring read.

Do you make surveys or just take them?: >> Take them, now.

When was the last time you were on a plane?: >> February.

Where were you going and why?: >> New Orleans, for wedding planning (mainly).

What’s the best news you’ve gotten lately?: >> One of my buddies from Discord bought me the Elsweyr expansion for ESO for my birthday lmao.

^And, the worst?: >> I haven’t gotten any bad news recently.

How is 2010 treating you so far, anyway?: >> LMAO... well, I’ll just answer for 2019. It’s been a little rocky at times, of course, but this is honestly one of the better years I’ve had so far, in comparison to past ones.

If you could invent something, what would it be?: >> I don’t know.

Tell me about your favorite pair of pants.: >> I don’t have a favourite pair.

Do you like getting dressed up?: >> Yeah.

Would you rather receive (or give) flowers, chocolates or jewelry?: >> I’m not really interested in any of those things.

Do you drink Vitamin Water?: >> No.

^If yes, what flavor is your favorite?: >> ---

What color are your headphones/earbuds?: >> Black. Is your technology up to date?: >> Not particularly, but it still works wonderfully.

Ever been stuck next to someone really annoying on a LONG plane/train ride?: >> Nope. I usually get either people who keep to themselves, or really kind old ladies or something.

What sound just drives you crazy?: >> Oh man, what sound doesn’t, lmao.

Would you be embarrassed to find out you snored loudly in public?: >> Sure, but I don’t snore so it’s not likely to happen.

Do you embarrass easily?: >> Not really, and if I do get embarrassed it’s usually a brief and manageable experience.

Why were you embarrassed last?: >> I don’t remember.

Are you afraid of heights?: >> No, but certainly incredible heights can be daunting because of that thing that happens where you think your body’s going to randomly go apeshit and throw you off the roof or something. Which it obviously won’t but brains are dumb.

What is a compliment you get most often?: >> I don’t get compliments often enough to be able to tally data.

Tell me about the last frightening/weird dream you had.: >> If I don’t make an effort to remember them, I forget them pretty quickly, so I don’t know.

Now, about the last pleasant dream you had.: >> See above.

Do you feel guilty about killing bugs?: >> Not really, but I’d still rather avoid doing so if I don’t have to.

If there is a spider in your room, will you be up all night knowing that?: >> Probably not. Flying insects, yeah, I’ll definitely be unable to sleep. But the spiders I’ve met tend to kind of just... chill. Or at least stick to the walls/ceiling and not get adventurous about, like, human faces or anything. Is there a trait typical to your gender that doesn’t apply to you?: >> ---

How do you feel about coconut?: >> It’s pretty good. Not in everything, though.

^ Ever cracked one open?: >> Nope.

If you like someone, what do you do?: >> ---

If you DON’T like someone, what do you do?: >> Not much, usually.

What do you feel most insecure about?: >> My ability to interact with other people in a manner that gets me what I need/want.

What’s the best thing about being your gender?: >> The best thing about having no gender is literally everything...

^ And the worst thing?: >> ...except that other people still misgender me on a daily basis.

Do you do your part to save the earth?: >> No...? I don’t bloody know, what even is my part.

Does it ROYALLY piss you off when your intended username is already taken?: >> Nah. I mean it’s fuckin annoying as hell lmao but I usually have backups.

What color do you wear most often?: >> Black.

Describe your sunglasses.: >> They’re just brown-tinted aviators.

What’s the most you’ve spent on a pair of sunglasses?: >> Probably like ten bucks.

^Or, ladies, what about a purse?: >> ---

Actually, what’s the most expensive clothing item/accessory you own?: >> In a few months it will be a bespoke suit. 0_0

Who do you think should have their portrait on a bill?: >> ???

What is your favorite spoken language to listen to?: >> All of them, really. I just think all human languages are fucking cool.

How long until you turn 40?: >> Exactly 8 years to the day!

Do you like coffee? >> Not really. Do your eyes ever twitch? >> Sometimes. Do you get excited when you get something in the mail that isn’t a bill? >> If it’s something worth being excited about, yeah -- like a gift or something novel that I ordered. What was the last thing you wrote by hand? >> I have no idea.

Why did you last feel exhausted? >> Because I’d had a demanding (not negatively so, but just full) day.

Have you ever used emotional blackmail to get your own way? >> Don’t think so, but maybe. Has anybody ever used emotional blackmail on you? >> Yeah. Assuming you have any, is your hair soft today? >> I mean, kind of. It’s more fuzzy-feeling than anything else because of the length. Who did you last worry about and why? >> --- Are you currently looking for a new place to live? >> No. When was the last time you ate/drank something gross just to be polite? >> I don’t. I absolutely refuse. I won’t insult it but I won’t consume it if I don’t like it and that’s that. Can you see any toys from where you’re sat? >> Plushies, yeah. Last time you heard a growl, who or what did it come from? >> Probably my stomach. Does it bother you when you forget something that you should know? >> Yes! What was the last thing you put off doing? >> I don’t remember. When did you last make up a baby’s bottle? >> --- What was the last thing you cooked? >> --- Do you eat your dinner at a dining table, coffee table or just off your lap? >> I just eat wherever I am, whether at my desk or in my room or whatever. When did you last see the sea? >> Not since I left New York :( Which would you prefer as a view; mountains or the sea? >> Either is nice, but I might prefer the sea. Do you have a mouse for your laptop? (Assuming you have a laptop) >> Yeah. Do you apologise a lot? >> No. Do you have any framed black & white photos in your home? Who are they of? >> There’s a random framed print of Audrey Hepburn on the wall lmao.

#surveys #survey #random survey

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punishandenslavesuckers · 6 years

Note

magnus/george? Magnus being involved a mortal war in itself is p interesting. Also like of course he was. (omly if u wanna of course)

Magnus/George!

It’s a tradition, when The Lone American makes dock in the port of London, that George Ramirez disembarks from his ship and heads straight to the heart of the city. He makes certain to stop by a bathhouse or make use of a friend’s sink and soap, scrub the rind of sea salt from his skin. He shaves a little, unpacks the only clean sweater, trousers, and shoes he has after a long time at sea. He packed them very particularly, wrapped in a witch’s charm and wax paper to keep it neat. Brujeríaisn’t respected the way warlock magic is respected, or known the way the Salem witches are known, but George doesn’t think much of that.

He’d be brujo himself if he had the disposition. But he doesn’t and so…

He heads down a side alley, one seemingly invisible to those not looking for it, the faintest breath of a glamore, a hint of illusion that smells faintly copper to him, like the smell off metal when it gets hot. Down this alley, there is color in the old brick walls, painted in by hands that know the world below. Downworlder hands painting Downworld murals. George ducks into a doorway recessed into the wall, heavy oak that swings open when he knocks and says, “I’m looking for monkshood and silver.”

It’s a vampire bar, after all, and not friendly to werewolves.

But he’s not here for werewolves.

He’s here for the man in the back room, behind the old oak door with Seelie runes carved in the wood. He moves to knock, but the heavy door swings open all on its own and Magnus Bane looks up from his desk to blink at him. Then, registering the familiar face, he smiles and stands. So just like that, all the weeks at sea slip easily from George’s shoulders. He’s light as a sunbeam now, growing lighter as one of the most powerful warlocks in Europe gives him a disapproving look and folds his arms.

“You can’t come here every time you make port,” says Magnus.

“I’ll come here as many times as necessary,” says George, tipping his cap just a little. “And if I should fail after all in winning you over, then it’s the memory I take back to the States.”

Magnus sighs. “This is a bar full of Belcourt vampires. You shouldn’t try to seduce me with so many still near.” He gives George a warning look as he circles away to grab a bottle of scotch and two glasses. “You’ll get yourself bloody well murdered and you know I’m not quite joking. If someone gets the notion you’re serious that could be the end of you, my lone American, and that would be a shame.”

George smiles. “When’ll you let me do it?”

“Do what?” Magnus says, pouring drinks.

“Steal you away to America.”

Magnus, in the process of pouring, almost spills the lot. He clears his throat loudly and puts the bottle down, then gestures with one hand so the door slams shut. He turns angrily on George.

“Alright. That was fun. Now listen very closely, you cannot say those kinds of things even in jest. It’s one thing to flirt with me, it’s quite another to threaten removing me from the country.”

“I’m not jestin’.” George should probably stop smiling like an idiot, but he can’t. So he just smiles while he makes his grand gestures. “You ever want off this damp island, just say so and I’ll take you to the New World, darlin’.”

Magnus looks faintly panicked now. “George. You’re not in love with me and even if you were, I’m with Camille. Like I’ve been for the past twenty years and that’s not—” he sighs— “not changing any time soon. So… have a drink.” He hands the glass to George and kind of tips his own glass in a toast. “And just enjoy the company until you head back to sea. Alright? You must have stories for me.”

George considers the warlock, just sitting there, leaning against his desk, dressed in a bespoke suit so expensive it’s probably worth more than everything George owns. So he finishes his drink in one go and sets the glass aside. Magnus, huffing, follows his lead. He shoots two fingers of scotch like they’re in a pub with whiskey. Then he reaches for the bottle again – so he misses it when George crosses the last long step between them, hook two fingers under his chin and tugs the warlock’s face up.

Magnus drops his glass but it never hits the floor, disappearing and reappearing on a shelf.

His mouth is soft, warm, and parted on the beginning of a protest which dies under the sweep of George’s tongue, lifting the words from his lips like ink not yet dried. He makes a low sound in his throat. Before Magnus can remember all the very good reasons why he forbade this thing exactly, George gathers the immortal’s head in his hand and cradles his neck, kissing him harder, more deeply, the way he’s been imagining all these months away. Magnus tastes like the scotch he just drank, like skin, like any other man but he’s not that at all—

And Magnus shoves him away. Firmly, not roughly, pushing him back a step.

“You can’t,” Magnus says coolly, “keep doing this.”

“First of all, I can if you let me. And second of all, I have to.” He gives up a lopsided grin. “One day you might say ‘yes’.”

“I won’t,” Magnus says. “And I don’t like people who ignore me when make it very clear what I want.”

“I know. One soulmate at a time kind of man, but you what I don’t like? I don’t like seeing you fading every time I come back.” George raises a hand and Magnus lets him, lets him brush the back of his fingers across his cheek. “Every time, I tell myself you know that I’ll leave you alone if you seem happy.”

“I am happy,” Magnus says quietly.

“Then you want me to sail away? Leave you alone for good? Never offer you safe harbor in some other place? You’ll be okay without me or someone like me?” He lowers his hand. “I come in here making grand gestures because it’s fun… but also cuz I think, one day, you’re gonna really want to put an ocean between you and here.”

Magnus says nothing, then, “Maybe one day, George. But not today.”

George smiles. “Then next time.”

Magnus sighs and fetches that bottle of scotch. “You might wait your whole life, George. Don’t hold out for me.”

“Thanks for the warning,” George says while quietly vowing to wait however long it takes.

24 notes · View notes

peoplesolutions1 · 3 years

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Assessing and Developing Culture, Engagement and Wellbeing in Organisations Webinar

Earlier in the year, Director of People Solutions, Mark Greenwood and colleague Georgia Nedkoff ran an online webinar and took a deep dive into assessing and developing culture, engagement and wellbeing in organisations through a number of case studies.

Webinar Agenda

Introduction

People Solutions, who we are

Case Study Overview

People Solutions Approach

Case Study 1 - Well-being Diagnostics – Mining

Case Study 2: Organizational Health Check

Case Study 3: Focus Groups for Engagement - Disabilities - Not-for-profit

Lessons Learnt

Questions & Final Thoughts

Watch our webinar, or read the transcription below

[00:03]

Mark: Thank you everybody for joining us. Other people may drop in as, as we go along. Great. If you need to shoot off or anything, that's fine too, but thank you for your time this afternoon. And for taking the time to listen to a couple of case studies that we have for you. My name's Mark Greenwood, I'm a Director of People Solutions and a registered Psychologist. My colleague here is Georgia Nedkoff. Georgia is a Consultant with the Business Center, registered Psychologist too. What we're going to do today is talk you through a bit of a slide deck of information, but also, we are going to talk through some specific case studies. The purpose of this webinar is actually to try and inform you about some processes that we use that you can use as well. So, it's to give you some ideas and hopefully give you some different thinking in terms of ways of approach a diagnosing culture and different issues within the business. As Georgia mentioned, if questions as you go along final off to us in the chat box, and we'll make sure we answer them at the end. Anything from your end Georgia?

[01:11]

Georgia: No, that's all good. I'm just going to start sharing our slide deck. Hopefully, it's not going to be death by PowerPoint. We will spend most of the time talking about the case studies there as well. So, I'm just going to share that with you all now.

Slide Content: People Solutions

• Perth-based Organizational Psychology consultancy with predominantly WA customers, as well as a national and global customer base • Strong track record in utilizing individual, team, and organizational diagnostics in the provision of organizational development services • Our purpose: “Helping People Succeed”

Mark: Okay. Just a quick introduction to People Solutions for those of you who don't know us. As a business, we've been around for over 20 years in Perth. Perth's our primary office, of course. We're organizational site consultancy and a lot of the work we do is in Western Australia, but of course these days with the internet and the sort of work that we do. We do work for national and global customers. We do work for the large corporates in oil and gas, mining and other areas right down to non for profits. So, and you'll see from the diversity of case studies that we talk about today, some of that range of different industries that we work in. We do work psychometric testing, assessment development centers, career transition outplacement services, but we also do organizational development work where the focus is really on looking at individuals, teams, and organizations, and coming up with the right sort of diagnostics for them. Our purpose helping people succeed, whether that's individuals, teams, or organizations, that's pretty much the focus of what we do. You get that wrong.

[02:50]

Slide Content: This Session

This Session

How do you assess culture, engagement, and wellbeing in a way that meets the needs of your business and its people?

Mark: This session, we're going to talk about how you assess culture engagement and wellbeing in these case studies. The case studies that we're using, they're not so big. So, I guess large that you'd look at them and think, well, I just can't do that myself. In fact, a lot of what we're going to talk about is stuff that you can apply within your own organization. We're looking very much at three different case studies, one that looks at culture, another one that was, is about engagement. And then the other one, which is looking about, more of the wellbeing overview for an organization. So, the first that Georgia is going to talk us through is with a mining company. I mean, to a mid-tier mining company they were interested in having a look at wellbeing across their operational workforce and came to us saying, how can we communicate to our workforce that this is something that's been talked about?

Slide Content: Case Studies

Well-Being Diagnostic Survey and Focus Groups • Mining Organizational Culture Survey • Oil and Gas Focus Groups for Engagement • Disabilities Not-for-Profit

[03:52]

Mark: But then also, what can we actually start doing about that? The second one is Oil and Gas company. Where they wanted to have a look at the culture of their business and the way they brought two businesses together. And the third is in a Disabilities Not-for-Profit area where they wanted to very much have a look at the engagement of the people within the business. What brought people to their business and kept them there. So, we're going to keep the information very focused on these case studies. And as I say, how you can apply these sorts of processes potentially within a new organization where you feel it's appropriate.

[04:26]

Slide Content: Step 1: Understand what success looks like

Step 1: Understand what success looks like

Clarify the reasons and expectations around outcomes. For example, to assess or understand: • Successful integration of new best practice • Minimal disruption to employees • Continued development following previous interventions • To maintain current success

Georgia: Okay. So, just before we jump into the case studies, I'm not going to spend too much time talking through this sort of backend process or setting up the scene. A lot of you on the webinar OD or HR professionals so it's quite likely that you have a really good understanding of diagnostics anyway. But in terms of people's solutions approach to overly simplify it, it's sort of a three-step approach when it comes to rolling out diagnostics within the business. The first step is in relation to understanding why. So, why it is that you are looking to assess certain areas. There could be something coming up in terms of some new research that's available for yourself within the business. There could be change going about within your organization, potentially there were some interventions that were put forward and you like a bit more understanding around that, or, maybe things are just going pretty well. And you sort of want to understand what are the things that are working well, and how can you look at retaining that or keeping that going as well. So, that's really brief. It’s really just about clarifying the why.

[05:37]

Georgia: So, you understand why we're doing this process and that can be clearly communicated to the employees as well. And that will also help you work out what it is that you're actually going to be looking for and who it is that you need to talk to in relation to this. So, this brings us on to our second step, which is about understanding what it is that you're going to be assessing, looking for diagnosing and who it is that you're going to be talking to in this process as well. Now, depending on that, we'll depend on the process that you take, whether it's customized diagnostics and off-the-shelf diagnostics, and whether your approach is going to be a survey, a focus group, or an interview as well.

Slide Content: Step 2: Ask the right questions and involve the right people

Step 2: Ask the right questions and involve the right people

Customized Pros: specific to needs and circumstances, evolve over time, face validity – better received Cons: time to develop

Off the shelf Pros: tried and tested, quick and easy, recognizable and marketable Cons: non-targeted to needs and circumstances, face validity

Surveys Pros: large numbers, quantitative data, anonymity, time and cost, All employees Cons: depth of information

Focus Groups Pros: medium numbers, qualitative data, discussion, cross-section of employees (mgmt. separate) Cons: time and cost

Interviews Pros: smaller numbers, qualitative data, one-on-one, all employees Cons: time and cost

[06:23]

Georgia: So, all the case studies that we are talking through during the session today, these are customized solutions. What people solutions do is we provide bespoke diagnostics. There may be situations where it could be more beneficial to put forward an off-the-shelf option. And this would be in the case of dealing with very large numbers and sort of just assessing where things are at initially as well. In the case studies that we talked to today, we will go through each of these different survey options in terms of surveys, focus groups, and interviews. So, you have a really good understanding in terms of what those different areas look like, and in your situation, which one may be most beneficial for yourselves as well. It is important with each different option you choose. They're obviously all going to have their pros, cons as well.

[07:18]

Georgia: So, it's important that you really define that why quite clearly, as this will help in terms of deciding what's the best approach for this two. The last step is to provide feedback. Once you've rolled out the diagnostics, it's really important that you do feedback that information to your employees as well. The amount of times, Mark and I have gone in to meet with organizations and the employees have thought, oh, here's another couple of consultants that are just going to come in, talk to us and then leave again without finding out what the outcomes of that are. It's really common. It is very important that you do feedback that information that's been gained from the diagnostic, what it is that you found out, any recommendations based on that within reason, that's going to be effective for your company to put forward and any timelines around those recommended as well.

Slide Content: Step 3: Feedback, respond, reassess

Step 3: Feedback, respond, reassess

Feedback within the organization should be: • Cascaded to involved parties • Timely • Align to team/Organizational goals • Focus on strengths as well as development areas.

Periodic reassessment enables identification of outcomes following OD interventions

[08:21]

Georgia: Aligning it to the organizational goals are great because that really helps to highlight to the employees how their role and how their feedback ties in with a broader organizational picture as well. Reassessing is really great in terms of, it gives you that benchmark when you initially do the diagnostic assessment, and then reassessing a year to a couple of years down the track can be really helpful in terms of understanding how those interventions have gone and how those changes have been made as well. So that's really brief in terms of defining why you're running out the diagnostics. What it is that you're looking for? What's going to be the best approach to that? Who you're going to ask? And ensuring that you're feeding back that information in a timely fashion as well. So we're going to spend more time through the case studies as this will help highlight that three-step approach a little bit more. Mark and myself have been to lots of webinars before.

Slide Content: Case Study 1: Well-being Diagnostics - Mining

Case Study 1: Well-being Diagnostics – Mining

The Brief:

Due to the release of finding into mental health and well-being of FIFO employees; the company requested feedback on current research to be delivered to employees.

Clarify:

Remote site had recently been re-staffed, and the organization requested an analysis of employees’ perceptions around maintaining and improving well-being.

The Goal:

To develop timely and effective targets and recommendations for action around the well-being of FIFO employees

[09:23]

Georgia: And we find talking to the case studies probably the best way to learn information and to take on board any information that's provided as well. So, our first case study is with like Mark mentioned a mid-tier mining company. They approached us on the back of some new research. There was research that was commissioned by the mental health commission around the mental health and wellbeing of FIFO employees. On the back of this, this organization requested Mark and myself to come in and present that information to employees, but they also wanted to understand, based on that report and the findings that came out of it. Where their employees sit in relation to that, and what are their perceptions in relation to FIFO areas that may impact mental health. So, these are things, a lot of us understand FIFO can impact mental health.

[10:22]

Georgia: That's things like swings, rosters, camp facilities, connections with their team, and also connections with others as well. We looked at sort of a wide range of factors in relation to that. Our goal for this project was to develop timely and effective targets and recommendations for this company, for actions around the wellbeing of their FIFO employees as well. How we went about this? Mark and I actually got the privilege of flying out to the site. So, this was pre-COVID days. And what we did was we presented the findings to employees prior to run rolling out the wellbeing diagnostics. By having this initial communication at the start with the employees at their pre-start meetings, this helped kind of prepare them and set them up that, Mark and I will be walking around on-site that will be putting forward surveys or running focus groups and really so that they could start thinking about their own wellbeing or areas of their own FIFO lifestyle that may impact this, or maybe quite positive as well.

Slide Content: Case Study 1: Well-being Diagnostics

Case Study 1: Well-being Diagnostics

The Diagnostics: • Cross sectional focus groups • Site wide wellbeing surveys

The Process: • Communicate FIFO Mental Health and Wellbeing Findings • Experience the work environment • Focus groups and surveys

[11:36]

Georgia: In terms of the approach, we took for this because it was a mid-tier organization so relatively large. What we did was roll out a sitewide survey. We had a pretty good response rate on this. So, all employees, including leadership participated in the surveys, and then we also ran some cross-sectional focus groups as well. With these focus groups, it was very important for us to keep the leadership or management team separate from any sort of operational staff as well. That way we find that the operational team feels more comfortable speaking about areas of improvement without feeling like they may be punished for speaking up as well. Not that they would be, but it does create that atmosphere of psychological safety as well. So, the reason we went for the survey and the focus groups was we found the surveys were really beneficial at looking at wellbeing from an individual perspective.

[12:41]

Georgia: For these surveys, we looked at things like employee satisfaction in their roles. The survey also included the depression, anxiety, stress scale, or DASS, which can help to look at certain areas where wellbeing may be impacted due to FIFO lifestyle as well. So, the surveys very much gave us that quantitative information that we were able to feedback to the employer. Then the focus groups were a nice add-on to that information. As these allowed us to delve a little bit deeper into areas that were identified within the survey as well. Now, the focus groups they were semi-structured. So, we would start off with some open-ended questions and ensure these questions tapped into those areas that were identified around FIFO wellbeing, such as camp facilities, connections with others, swing, and roster as well. These focus groups really just allowed people to have a chance to communicate, talk, share their ideas and perspectives as well.

[13:42]

Georgia: And because Mark and I were there facilitating them, we were able to bring in people that may be a bit more quiet and really relay that information in a way that people could understand and so that they felt comfortable putting full or their ideas as well. So, our process was first, we communicated the outcomes of the firefighter's mental health and wellbeing report. We advised our role and why we'd be there. We also got to experience the work environment by going out onto the site as well and seeing things firsthand in terms of the camp facilities. And then we had that survey and focus group combination as well. So, in terms of the outcomes from this, here are just some brief snapshots from the report that we provided. But essentially what we did was we used findings in the quantitative information from the surveys we'd present that in tables or graphs. And then that focus group information so that qualitative data were able to pull out themes from that and make connections with what was found within the survey summaries.

Slide Content: Case Study 1: Well-being Diagnostics

Case Study 1: Well-being Diagnostics

The Outcome: Eighty five percent (85%) of participants were ‘moderately’ to ‘very’ satisfied with their job.

The majority expressed a preference for 12:9 or 2:2 rosters but few had thought of implications of changes.

Quote “Everything is good out here.”

[14:49]

Georgia: For example, within the surveys looking at that DAS scale or depression, anxiety, stress, the area around feeling tired and having fatigue was the lowest area that was found for these FIFO employees. Based on that, and based on our discussions from the focus group, it was found that transitioning from day to night shifts, employees tended to find these as more effective than the transition from the night to day shifts as well. We are able to provide some recommendations based on that as well. When feeding back information you know, most companies and most people tend to focus on the and negatives. We all have that negative confirmation bias. It is really important that you still include that positive information within there. For the most part, 85% of these FIFO employees were moderately to very satisfied with their role. A lot of them did communicate that they really enjoyed the organization. They appreciated working there, but hey, here are some suggestions on ways in which things can be done more effectively as well.

[15:59]

Slide Content: Case Study 1: Well-being Diagnostics

Case Study 1: Well-being Diagnostics

The Outcome:

Recommendations 1. Research does suggest that even time or shorter time rosters are best for wellbeing. Implications for increased business costs should be weighed against workforce wellbeing, costs and productivity. A cost benefit analysis could be carried out regarding roster change, the strengths and opportunities changing rosters may provide as well as the threats. Employees should be educated as to the potential gains/losses if switching to a different roster. 2. Given reported fatigue surrounding transitioning from night shift to time off site, wellbeing and health consequences versus the safety aspects of this shift change should be investigated. Use of shift work specialist and/or shift work/fatigue modelling software can be of great assistance here, particularly if reducing shift times is a business option.

Quick Win: Prepare and educate workers to manage day to night transitions, as well as night to day transitions when they fly out, to optimize health and provide adequate recovery time between day and night shift transitions.

Georgia: When providing those statistics that quantitative and qualitative information, it's also important that you put forward some outcomes as well, based on that data. So, the data's all well in good, but what can we actually do with that? What are some suggestions and things that could be put forward as well? With recommendations, not all of them can be implemented that's why it's important to have a discussion with the company in terms of what's reasonable. And having a look at that research out there as well in terms of what is best in relation to this. For example, for this group research did suggest that, even time or shorter rosters are more effective for wellbeing. That's what the research suggests. However, there are business and personal costs based on this. A lot of employees, they wanted those shorter rosters or those even time rosters, but they didn't consider that, that would then impact their remuneration as well.

[16:57]

Georgia: There are things to consider when putting forward recommendations as well. Along with these sorts of recommendations that require a bit more longer-term thinking and longer-term planning, quick wins are always fun, and they're always things that organizations can implement straightaway. When reporting these findings, we do find the quick wins really helpful for businesses. For example, this one is just about preparing and educating workers to manage the day to night transitions. So, any information that can be provided to them a little bit more can help in terms of reducing that fatigue as well.

[17:36]

Slide Content: Case Study 2: Organizational Health Check - Oil and Gas

Case Study 2: Organizational Health Check – Oil and Gas

The Brief: A non-operational oil and gas investment business acquired an operational business. The business had attempted to amalgamate two very different organizations with two explicit cultures.

Clarify: Uncover and analyze current operating culture: what is working, what is not working, and how has culture changed since the amalgamations.

The Goal: Run an organizational ‘health check’ to assess the current operating culture – what is currently working, and how might the organization build upon this into the future.

Mark: Alright. Thank you, Georgia. I'll talk you through case study number two, this is a project we run. In fact, we've done a couple of surveys with this company, one a few a year or so ago, two years ago, almost and another more recently, just as a bit of a follow-up. The organization came to us and said, look, we want to do an organizational health check. And we said, what is that exactly? Because a health check can mean anything from physical to wellbeing and many other things. So, what they wanted to do was to get a snapshot of the organizational culture in a sense. Now, what’s this organization, there was a, they amalgamated, or they'd acquired recently an operational business. So, they had gone from a non-operational investment house to a having an operating facility within their organization. In that, they have two very different cultures.

[18:38]

Mark: So, they've got cultures that are in some respects, just totally at odds with each other. And what I mean by that is, one's very much focused on the investment side of their business. The other is producing operational results. The first thing we did, we want to clarify, so what do you really want to get from this organizational health check? What they wanted to understand was what was their current operating culture: what was working and what wasn't working, and how would that potentially have changed since the amalgamation of the two businesses. The organizational health check was to have a look at that operating culture as it currently exists. What was working and how it might build on that into the future. The information that can get now, they thought we can use this to bring together a more cohesive culture that works despite the amalgamation of these two businesses.

[19:30]

Slide Content: Case Study 2: Organizational Health Check - Oil and Gas

Case Study 2: Organizational Health Check

The Diagnostics: • One-on-One interviews, organizational health ‘check’ • Organization wide

The Process: • Engaging with People Solutions as a third party to communicate the rationale along with the executive team • Create an environment where all employees were able to share their perspectives • Clarity of in scope/out of scope!

Mark: The diagnostics. It was quite important when we discussed with the organization that the executives in the business, they said, we want everybody in the organization to have a voice. Now, as Georgia mentioned before, if you are talking an organization with thousands of people doing one-on-one interviews, isn't going to be pragmatic. Not unless you want to pay a consulting team, a lot of money, and a lot of time to do that for you. So, they said, no, we have a business, which is of a size where we can get you to do one-on-one interviews because we want everybody to feel like they've been heard so that they have it, an ability to put forward their ideas, and then their opinion. That's what they wanted by way of the organizational health check. And they wanted everybody in the business to participate.

[20:19]

Mark: They didn't mandate it, but they did say we'd like everybody to be involved. We said, yes, great. We can do that for you. We put together a structured interview. When you're going into these sorts of situations, you do want to have an understanding of what are the sort of factors that we're going to be trying to measure here? It’s really important. We said, okay, first of all, we need to be clear with the executive team as to what we're trying to achieve here. But also, we need to talk to everybody in the business and communicate what this is about. We got them to organize a town hall meeting, where everybody was, came along, they put on a light lunch and said, here are some people we're going to do this project. They'll explain to you who they are and how this is going to work.

[21:06]

Mark: So, we introduced ourselves and we provided information on, this is what's in scope. This is what this organizational health check is going to do. What we're going to be asking about? What we're going to be talking about? We made it really clear about what's confidential. Confidentiality is really important to get people to speak clearly, and then honestly, about how they feel. We communicated those messages. We said, look, here are our business cards. If you want to contact us independent of the business, just discuss more about what we are doing, happy to do that. We wanted to create an environment where everybody could share their perspectives. We made sure that people understand what's in scope and what's out of scope. And as Georgia mentioned before with the mining company, I mean, if you go and talk to people and say, well, hey, tell us what your problems are.

[21:56]

Mark: Everyone's going to think about, well, what do I don't, what don't I like? What should I talk about? They're going to always give you feedback. But you've got to make it clear. Well, if one person says, I don't think I'm remunerated fairly, that doesn't add up to an organizational or cultural problem. That's one person. It's clear, important to say, look, we're not here to advocate for you to get more money. We're here to get a snapshot of the organization. It's important for both with the organization and with the people that you are talking to, to make sure that they understand what is in and what is out of scope when you embark on these sorts of projects. Now, there's a bit of detail here. It's probably a little hard to read for you. But just to summarize it, when we did this overview in 2019, some of the things that we found and are pure by having these structured interviews, as I say. First of all, the organization culture and vision almost 60% of the employees didn't actually know the future of the business.

Slide Content: Case Study 2: Organizational Health Check

Case Study 2: Organizational Health Check

The Outcome 2019:

Four main themes emerged from the interviews as areas for improvement:

Organizational culture & vision • 58% of employees want to know more about the future direction of the ABC business. • Those who were aware of the future direction only understand it from a broader sense. • Those who were not aware would like more clarity on ABC’s vision and direction. • Differing cultural business approaches (top-down vs bottom-up decision-making) are creating confusion between employees and managers.

Organizational structure • 54% of employees identified a need for more open communication between departments. • Most respondents described ABC as siloed • Employees feel they are rarely asked for their feedback or involved in decision-making (decisions are made from the top-down). • Employees felt their career trajectory with ABC is limited by a ceiling in the structure. • Perceived disparity with ABC, ACD and contractor employment.

Communication • 57% wanted leaders to communicate more openly with employees. • Since the integration there has been little concerted effort to communicate across departments. • Perceived lack of transparency from Senior Management regarding vision and pipelines. • Most feel that changes are communicated abruptly and post-hoc, rather than consulting or informing staff throughout the process.

Processes & Systems • 60% felt the current processes and systems hamper their ability to work effectively. • The different systems and contracts for ACD versus ABC creates confusion and extra work, especially for Finance & Admin staff. • Issues with the Document Management System and financial systems are impacting productively, efficiency, and accuracy. • Having inconsistencies work processes is impacting role clarify for staff in some roles.

[23:02]

Mark: What they meant was, they, although the business had been brought together successfully in terms of communication, there wasn't a broader vision painted for them as to where are we going? Are we going to grow the organization? Are we going to be pursuing new projects? Are we going to be pursuing alternative energy sources or whatever else? So, a lot of people in the business had this feeling. We don't really know where it's all headed. It's a problem. The org structure a lot of, almost half or a bit over half, in fact, said there's a need, the business is siloed. We need the opportunity to have better communications across the business. We're not working finance, isn't working with operations administration, isn't supporting these other areas as effectively. There was a disconnect in that sense.

[23:55]

Mark: They wanted to get out of the silos and work together more cohesively. 57% wanted their leaders to communicate more openly. They had a feeling that our leaders potentially know where we are going, but we don't. In relation to things like performance, in relation to how different parts of the business are working with each other, there wasn't clarity. And 60% said, the current processes, the systems happened, their ability to work effectively. And if that was two businesses bringing together two sets of processes and systems. We made some recommendations on that. I mean, just, and a really simple recommendation was like, is that we suggested the CEO, the exec team should, is that implementing a town hall process. And what we mean by that is bringing employees together and saying, this is the vision of the business. Trying to create some clarity for people so that they understand, what, where is the business going?

[24:52]

Mark: Talking about the org structure, how can we change the org structure? So, there is more communication. Implementing communications processes internally, but also even things like implementing social activities so that people get to know other people in the business and then communicate more freely. Simplistic recommendations. When we did this, we repeated the process for the business in 2021. Yes, the improvements in morale and team spirit had improved significantly. A majority of the people are now near the future direction of the business. They, like all of us, had gone through the whole COVID lockdown process. And they said, look, that had been really well managed by the leaders. 87% knew the standards required of their team. 86% said their manager encouraged them to give produce, give the of ideas for improvement. We'd seen a significant improvement in terms of the way the business was working and that people understood each other more.

Slide Content: Case Study 2: Organizational Health Check

Case Study 2: Organizational Health Check

The Outcome 2021: Highlights & Improvements Since 2019 • Improvement in morale and team spirit since 2019 • A majority (75%) of respondents know the future direction of ABC

People and leaders perceived to have managed the COVID-19 lockdown well

87% Know the standards required of their team • 86% said their manager encourages ideas for improvement • 70% said people work well together at ABC (up from 50% in 2019)

Organizational Direction • Participants identified Project A, a focus on energy transition, and growing as an operator in industry as future directions • The medium to longer term vision was not as clear and employees want to understand the longer term plans better 27% still do not feel that they know the company vision

Trust & Communication • Participants said townhalls had been effective and expressed a desire to continue these and social events • Slight decrease in level of trust in team and leader to deliver on promises since 2019 • There is still a lack of communication between departments • 53% did not feel that management actively solicit input from employees on major decisions

[25:56]

They were clear on the vision. There was good, greater clarity. The organizational direction, well, there had been a project that the business was now focused on pursuing, of course, a common per project brings people together. But people knew a little bit more about, okay, where are we going in terms of certainly this project. But there was still some desire to understand, what's the longer-term future. So, there were still issues there. Trust and communication. Some of these things like town halls, people said that have been very effective. But there were still some issues in terms of the trust. Where's our leader going in terms of promises and where's the communication. How can we continue to improve on that? But there'd definitely been some improvements. Again, an interesting way of gathering data in terms of where's the culture at within an organization.

[26:51]

Slide Content: Case Study 3: Focus Groups for Engagement - Disabilities Not-for-profit

Case Study 3: Focus Groups for Engagement – Disabilities Not-for-Profit

The Brief: This organization experienced frequent turnover of one employment group within their staff. Is it the money…?

Clarify: Further discussion advised the company want to better understand the motivators/demotivators of their staff.

The Goal: Provide information that would allow to organization to shape the teams’ roles and ensure ongoing engagement. Recruitment – attraction and retention.

Mark: The next case study I'm going to talk about is in the disabilities non-for-profit sector. In this particular assignment, we decided focus groups were the best way to go. Rather than sort of individual interviews or an organizational-wide survey. This organization, when they contacted us initially, they said, oh, look, we've got turnover. In a particular part of our business, an important part of their business. And of course, their question, I guess a lot of people ask the question, is it the money? And we said, okay, well, let's think about it a little bit more. What do you want to get out of us trying to find out more information on this? So, the company wanted actually to find out, what is motivating or demotivating their staff? Are people leaving because of the money or are there other reasons potentially involved here?

[27:47]

Mark: And they wanted to focus this on the specific area that people were leaving from the business. It wasn't a, let's talk to everybody. It's these particular skills, disability skills workers. They are the focus of where what we want to have a look at. They're an important part of our business. So, when we talked to them a little bit more, we said, okay, well, let's, we can gather that information on what motivates and demotivates your people, but this information can be useful to you on an ongoing basis in that. It would allow them to think about how the teams work and the roles that they have, but also it can be used in attraction and retention. If you can find out what keeps people, what attracts them, what motivates people to join the organization, and then what keeps them here. You've got information that can add to your attraction and retention processes.

[28:35]

Mark: This organization, not a huge organization in disability services had differently at geographic locations. So, we went to each of these locations and conducted a focus group with the skills workers. The part of that process was sitting down with the group of skills workers, myself in Georgia, in an open environment in sort of the back of the warehouse type of thing. We said, look, we don' want management to be present. Only because we want people to be able to speak honestly. If they were all saying, look, we think we've really poorly paid and it's not worth staying here. We don't want them to feel pressure from management if they're speaking openly like that. We had a particular motivation survey that we developed and this wasn't highly complex. It was just saying, what are some of the motivators that keep you engaged in your work?

Slide Content: Case Study 3: Focus Groups for Engagement

Case Study 3: Focus Groups for Engagement

The Diagnostics: Focus groups with each team [location-based], assessing engagement and motivation [Motivations survey]

The Process: Communicate and translate the importance the employees role played within their organization and the community • Ask open ended questions to better understand what attracted them, what they enjoy about their work, and what keeps them engaged and motivated in the role

[29:34]

Mark: We got everybody to fill that in. That was a sort of five-minute, 10-minute process. And then we had an open discussion with them. Again, what's in scope, what's out of scope? Again, we're here to gather this information. We're not telling you that everything's going to change because we're involved and we're gathering this information, but legitimately, what are we going to do? We're going to give direct feedback to the leadership saying these are the issues for you as to what keeps you here and what doesn't. So, the process of communicating and translating the importance of the employee's role and played within their organization. And the business said, we want you to tell our people, we tell them anyway, but we want you to tell them we're doing this because we do value your opinion. They are important to us as a business.

[30:16]

Mark: The actual focus group itself. If you're running a focus group, it’s very easy for people in a focus, particularly the more vocal members to drag a conversation in a particular direction. Part of your facilitating that focus group, you have to make, keep people onto a bit of a track in terms of what they're talking about and if they're deviating or departing from that. If it's important and everybody's sort of agreeing, then you can let them go down that track a bit, but you've got to try and keep one person who might just be continually banging on about their particular gripe. Is that a gripe that's consistent with everybody in the business or is that just them, their particular issue? So, yes, for us, it was getting those open-ended questions, but keeping to attract, keeping to some focus on those motivations. What they enjoy about their work and what keeps them motivated.

[31:13]

Slide Content: Case Study 3: Focus Groups for Engagement

Case Study 3: Focus Groups for Engagement

The Outcome: Overall themes • Work-life balance and flexibility were identified as top motivators, followed by helping others, personal growth and learning opportunities. These also helped to keep people engaged in their jobs. • Effective leadership from middle management at each depot was described as supportive, transparent, helpful, and approachable, which helped keep employees engaged. • Friendships and connections made amongst the employees were seen as beneficial. • Limited or ineffective communication from senior leadership was a key demotivator across depots and Skill Trainers would like greater transparency around ABC’s goals and direction.

Recommendations • Leverage key motivators and engagers in recruitment strategies • Review available technological systems and OHS process – provide training where gaps exist • Review induction process and include more support and training during onboarding (mentor/shadow) • Run bi-monthly ‘Town Hall’ style meetings with employees and senior managers to increase transparency • Implement clear Key Performance Indicators • Clearly communicate roster changes in a timely fashion • Provide realistic job preview during recruitment and review job descriptions to fit requirement of role

Mark: Really interesting in terms of the outcome. The people who worked in this disability services group. For them, they did the work because of work-life balance and flexibility. It was really important to them. They actually weren't there for the money. Very few. In fact, in all of these exercises that Georgia and I have talked about, these case studies. Money came down as very low in terms of what was a motivator for people to either stay or leave. They, people in this industry also had an enormous amount of satisfaction they fill in, that they're helping others. They like the work-life balance. I can go, I finish early. I can go to my doctor. I can go shopping, pick up the kids, whatever the case might be. But they also got a really strong sense of intrinsic satisfaction of what I do is important because I'm helping other people. They told us that the leadership in terms of their immediate management was effective. It was beneficial. It was helpful to them.

[32:15]

Mark: The friendships and connections they made amongst their colleagues, but also with the people with disabilities was really important to them. A lot of them were socialized after work. They'd go to the local quiz night, these sorts of things. So, those social connections in their work were really important. They explained to us that really, they didn't know who the next senior leadership was within the business and effectively they didn't really understand the sort of greater, I guess the purpose of the business they saw the purpose was to help these people gain skills. Now, the recommendations I might talk through all of these, but it was really interesting. The thing we noticed was there was a nexus here or a disconnect. And that is that the people in the business, the skills workers were there because they enjoyed their work. They really liked helping people. That was a really important priority to them.

[33:10]

Mark: A lot of them knew they could get more money in other industries, but they said, we're here because we want to help these people. That's really important to us. And yet the business is saying to them, we need you to work more quickly. We need you; we've got to finish this project because we need the money because the business was very focused. The leadership was very focused on the commercial aspect of what they do. So, what I'm saying, there is one part of the business is saying to them, we need the commercial outcome. And yet the individual's delivering the service and thinking, no, we're here for the people who need the help. So, what the problem is there is that they don't understand the vision of why is the leadership pushing for this and the leadership doesn't effectively understand? What's really motivating our people in the work they do.

[33:56]

Mark: We spoke to them about that. First of all, the thing that we came up with from doing this is we identify these are key engages in terms of the potential in recruitment. So, when you are looking for people in business, work-life balance, and flexibility are going to be really important. Appealing to individuals, intrinsic desire to help others is going to be important in your advertising or your sort, your attraction and processes. We talked to them about the technology, we suggested, well, again, it's time for Town Halls. And what we mean by that is again, your leadership coming down and saying, the reason we're focused on the commercial outcome is it allows us to help more people with disability. But how do we do that? And allow you guys to feel like you're really providing a service. So, really important messages.

[34:43]

Mark: There were other things about communicating roster changes, which was sort of annoying to individuals. These would happen at the last minute and making sure simple things like making sure when people were coming into the business, the recruitment, the induction process was developed more effectively. They found that a lot of people would join wanting to help others, but would be dropped into it. And within a week they're feeling overwhelmed. Working with people with disabilities is more challenging, their felt than they thought. But if you had somebody who could mentor you, shadow you, and engage you a little bit more and how to deal with some of those challenges, they felt that the outcomes would be more effective. So, that's a quick overview. As I say, focus groups, the right solution, smaller focus groups, sort of what we had about 10 to a dozen people in each one of them. And people, they put on morning and afternoon teas that always keep people engaged. They were about two hours, no more than that. But it allowed us to get some really good information and provide that feedback to the business. Lessons learnt. That's Georgia and I on a site with our high beast gear. Georgia is going to talk to a couple of points on the lesson learnt, and then I'll finish off. Over to you.

Slide Content: Lessons Learnt

Lessons Learnt How do you assess culture, engagement and wellbeing in a way that meets the needs of your business and its people?

[36:00]

Slide Content: Lessons Learnt

Lesson Learnt: Challenges and Limitations • Information collected must be analyzed to develop specific, realistic, actionable recommendations which should serve to meet the needs of a business and its people • Employees need to be brought on board to feel invested in the process and that it will be worthwhile • Employees need to feel confident in the fact that their speaking up won’t result in negative outcomes or that their input remains confidential • Business need to communicate the outcomes to employees in a time-efficient fashion

Georgia: Cool. Those are our case studies. With everything that we roll out and as psychologists, there's always limitations to things that you do and things to be mindful of and lessons learnt from the process as well. I suppose, in terms of rolling out processes like these, a lot of the time in what Mark and I experienced a meeting with these organizations is the Senior Leadership or HR team tend to know already what the problems are, or what are the areas of focus. However, that doesn't mean that the reasons for those behaviors or the reasons for those complaints or things could be based on the information that you can see. There could be deeper things going on for these people as well. And that's where even though you may know that information, it can be really important and really valuable to have these confidential diagnostics. Whether they're an interview survey or focus group, that can help you understand a little bit deeper as to the reasons behind the behaviors or the reasons behind the comments from employees as well.

[37:14]

Georgia: Getting this information, having data, and having that quantitative or qualitative information can help to then guide actionable items or actionable recommendations that are pragmatic and aligned with your business goals as well. So, although you may already know, the issues or the reasons going on, actually rolling out diagnostics can help gain buy-in as well to any recommendations that come about and can help provide a deeper meaning. It also helps employees feel that they listen to and that they can trust being open and honest in these situations as well. So, employees also need to be brought on board to feel invested in the process and that it's worthwhile. So, having clear communication upfront and having clear communications at the end can really help employees feel that the process is worthwhile for them too. Obviously, doing things like interviews or focus groups that engagements there whereas surveys, you may tend to find that the completion rate is a little bit lower and that's quite common as well.

[38:12]

Georgia: Employees need to feel confident in the fact that they're speaking up won't result in any negative outcomes. So, this is the reason why we tend to keep management or leadership-focused groups separate from that of other employees, not to say that it will, but employees can feel a lot more confident speaking up if they feel, there's no leaders listening as well. And whenever we run these things, it is very important to let employees know that their responses are confidential and that all responses are presented as an aggregate. So, as a group. No individual is kind of pinpointed. Specifically, because as Mark mentioned before, we are looking at common themes that come about. If one employee mentions that they'd like a better coffee machine in the office, but the rest of the group hasn't then that's information that you don't put into those reports as well. And then lastly, and I mentioned this before businesses need to communicate the outcomes to employees in a time-efficient fashion. This is very important. You do need to ensure that you sort of communicate that information quickly in time efficiently just to keep employees warm and to keep them trusting the process as well.

[39:41]

Slide Content: Lessons Learnt

Lessons Learnt: How do we create success? • Targeted information gathering strategies (e.g. focus groups, interviews, diagnostic assessments) • Tailored- not generic! • Base recommendations on data derived from your people • Tailor recommendations/interventions • Build pragmatic/timely solutions • Communicate findings/timelines • Maintain/create trust

Mark: Cool. Alright. We'll wrap up because we're getting close to time, but just the lessons learnt. Target your information. Think about what's the right process to apply, not every process and you can have a combination of these things as we suggested. Tailoring them, if it's an organizational survey across 3000 people, well again, the degree to which you're going to tailor that to specific areas is going to be different. But if you are looking for smaller diagnostic processes within your organization, targeted particular areas, you can tailor them. Based on your recommendations on data from your people, with all of these assignments, we produce an A4 infographic that we give to the business and say, look, here's what you can release to your people, which explains the outcomes of what came from these surveys or these focus groups or whatever else.

[40:35]

Mark: That, and for some businesses, there might be challenges in that, for the example, the oil and gas business that case study, they said, yes, we want you to tell our, communicate this back to our people. So, we stood up in front of the group and said, well, look, yes, these were the findings. 58% of you don't understand what the vision is, and the leadership said, yes, that's something we're going to work on changing. So, that sort of feedback proves to people that they've been listened to and that it's something happening. Tailor your recommendations and interventions. Not all of them have to be complex. They can be relatively simple and an easy win as Georgia just said. But understand and make sure people understand what's in scope and what isn't. Build pragmatic, make the solutions timely and the feedback timely too.

[41:22]

Mark: As I say that that constant feedback, we get is another consultancy or another cultural survey or another survey, nothing ever comes in these. When you can start implementing just some basic timely solutions, easy wins, then people start feeling their sum response. Communicate the findings of timelines. And by doing all of this, you maintain, create trust in the people in the business that they're being listened to. That's probably enough from us. We've run to 45 minutes. Thank you very much for your time and attention. We appreciate that. I hope there's been some interest as Georgia mentioned. We are happy to share slides with you. If there are any questions please fire away.

[42:10]

Slide Content: Questions?

Questions?

Georgia: So, we do have a question here that says, what are some factors that you consider when recommending realistic actions?

Mark: Good question. Thank you, Greg. Look, the factors in terms of, there are some things that obviously it's really important to make sure that people understand what's in scope and what's out of scope. Now, with the mining example that Georgia spoke about. The employee said, oh, look, you know, what would we'd do ideally. And if you ask her, I guess, a lot of people in those five arrangements, we'd love to go to an even time roster. Now, a realistic action for the organization and communicating that back and say, everybody wants to go to an even time roster. Is that realistic to the business? And the business were very clear. they said, no, it can't happen. Because number one, from an operational point of view and a whole range of other reasons from, I'm sure there were financial perspectives in there that, no, we can't do that.

[43:12]

Mark: But also, they said to the employees in the business that we can do that. But you know that if we go to that sort of roster, there will be an, there will be a financial implication for you as well. It's not just the business saying, well, we want to make more money or save money, but realistically, if we go to an even time roster, your remuneration's going to potentially decrease. Now, when people consider that that's an I can’t will know. So, in terms of thinking about those realistic actions, it's creating an understanding of what's in and out of scope, but then also communicating back to people. Well, there are some things here that we can do, we can act upon immediately like under getting you to understand the vision. But there are some things in terms of what everybody's wanting here that are longer term prospects that have to be thought out at a more strategic level. And we're going to have to take time to think about and get back to you on. So, I hope that answers your question there, Greg, but it is very much making sure people understand what can and can't be achieved within that scope.

[44:20]

Georgia: Any other questions? Anyone will give maybe just another minute or so? That all sounds pretty clear. Obviously, as I mentioned before, this session is being recorded. We can pop those slides up as well and send those through to you. And if any more questions do come up around that as well. We do have another question here. What if the staff doesn't agree that management are coming up with realistic actions, i.e. the more fluffy approach to the more strategic?

[44:52]

Mark: Yes. Realistically, you know, there are going to be things that the staff look at and say, look, we don't agree with this, you know? So, the staff doesn't agree that, we don't agree with there's a particular approach that we are suggesting. I'm just trying to think of an example. So, the recommendations that we made in the non-for-profit group, the staff, one of them was, there's, the staff need to be trained up more in terms of the use of some technology. Now, if the staff say, we don't really agree with that. The management then would say, look, this is the reason that, you suggested there's some, this is something that you want to do. Sure. It's going to make, take time for you to actually get up to speed with that.

[45:39]

Mark: But if this is something that's impeding you in your job, then we think it's important. So, I guess the basis comes down to, how are the management going to communicate what's required of people in terms of those sorts of changes and what's required of them not, it's not all about, well what's management going to do to solve all the problems here. It's very much about, what are we going to do that? The more fluffy approach to the strategic, I think, I guess what I'm saying, what I think there is the strategic stuff, and that will take time. It's very difficult for an organization to say, hey, we are going to make a strategic change overnight. It's trying to think about, within all of the recommendations that we might provide or within the information that you get from your focus group. You've got to take that back and say, there are some small wins here that might be easily implemented in terms of providing some extra assistance to people or providing them some training and development. But we've also got to step back and think of some of the bigger picture stuff here.

[46:46]

Mark: How does it, what we are thinking about doing time with our strategic direction? So again, for the Non-for-Profit that I spoke about, what's their way overall strategy in terms of continuing to grow the business so that they can ensure they provide services to people with disability. So, they've got to think about the strategy, how they can do that, and yet maintain these people who are delivering the service for them. Yes, absolutely. It's something that has to be considered. I don't have all the answers there.

[47:16]

Georgia: Cool. Great. Thanks, Tracy. Doesn't seem like we have any more questions here. But like I did mention just previously, we will send out the recording once that's uploaded and the slides that'll be from myself or Mark. So, feel free to come back to us with any questions. If anything does come up as well, more than happy to provide that advice and insight as well. Thank you so much for your time, everyone. I really appreciate it. Hope your stomachs aren't grumbling as much as mine is as well. But really do hope you enjoy the rest of your day and we'll chat to you soon.

Mark: Thanks for joining us.

Georgia: Thanks, guys.

Mark: Take care.

Georgia: Bye.

This article Assessing and Developing Culture, Engagement and Wellbeing in Organisations Webinar is republished from: https://www.people-solutions.com.au/

Source: https://www.people-solutions.com.au/blog/assessing-and-developing-culture-engagement-and-wellbeing-in-organisations-webinar/

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strangedreamings · 7 years

Text

And here’s the next one. I might add that I wrote these chapters long before Intertwined.

Sherrinford to the Rescue ch 2.

Carrying his two suitcases, Ford climbed the stairs to 221B and knocked on the door. After a moment, the door was opened by an old lady he knew from her file to be Mrs. Martha Hudson. She took in his dingy white trainers, faded blue jeans, grey t-shirt, navy hoodie, and black leather jacket without question, but it was his ginger curls that threw her.

“Sherlock?” she asked, confused. “I thought you were upstairs. I must say, this disguise…”

He smiled a bit, gently. “It’s Sherrinford, actually. I’m the Holmes brother no one talks about.”

Her eyes widened. “You’re Sherlock and Mycroft’s brother?”

He nodded. “I’m Sherlock’s twin, just back from six months in South Korea.”

Mrs. Hudson finally noticed the suitcases he was carrying and let him in. “Is Sherlock expecting you?”

“Uh, no, I’m something of a surprise.”

“He could use some cheering up, after everything that’s happened. Has anyone told you…” She trailed off, her eyes sad.

“Mycroft told me about Mary Watson,” he said gently. “It’s why I’m here. Mrs. Hudson, could I trouble you for some tea later? I need a nap but after that I could really use a cuppa and Sherlock probably needs one too. I’d make some but Mycroft said anyone entering Sherlock’s kitchen needs a hazmat suit.”

She smiled weakly. “Oh, of course, I’ll make a pot.”

He gave her his best boyish grin. “Got any Penguins?”

She laughed softly. “For you, I just might.”

“You’re a peach, Mrs. Hudson.” He gave her a salute then carried his bags upstairs to Sherlock’s flat. He set them down in the hallway then poked his head in the sitting room. Sherlock was sitting in the leather chair by the currently unused fireplace, his fingers steepled in front of his face.

The Mind Palace look, Ford thought. He’ll be unreachable for a while. He carried his bags up the stairs to what Mycroft had told him was John Watson’s old room. Taking the time to fully unpack, he then went back downstairs and walked into his brother’s sitting room, plopping down onto the sofa and promptly falling asleep.

“What the bloody HELL are you doing here?!”

Ford woke up from his nap with a start and looked up at the source of his disturbance. Sherlock was standing over him in black bespoke trousers, a white dress shirt, and the blue silk dressing gown Ford remembered his twin owning during their uni days. As if the cursing wasn’t enough, Sherlock’s ice-cold glare told Ford exactly what his twin was feeling.

Ford groaned quietly. “Do you mind, Lock? You know I can’t sleep on airplanes and I’ve been up since 5 AM Seoul time, thanks to Mike.”

“I don’t care about your sleep schedule,” Sherlock said, every word dripping in annoyance. “I want to know why you are suddenly in my flat now after not seeing you for fourteen years.”

“Mike told me what happened with the Watsons,” Ford said as he stood up and stretched. “He ordered me to keep an eye on you. Since he signs my paychecks, I thought I should obey.” At his brother’s wary look, he took a deep breath then held out his hand. “Lock … Sherlock, I want to apologize again for what I did at uni. Trying to pass off your papers as mine was beyond low and I’m sorry.”

Sherlock eyed his twin’s outstretched hand for a moment, his expression neutral, then he finally shook it. “Ancient history.”

Ford grinned. “Great! Now that that’s over, I’ll ask Mrs. Hudson if she can make us some tea.”

“I’ve already texted her. She’ll be up soon.”

“Got anything to eat around here?” Ford wandered into the kitchen and immediately started to gag from the smell. “Christ, I thought Mike was exaggerating! What died in here?” He looked around at the moldy, decomposing … things. “Maybe an easier question to answer is, what didn’t die in here?”

“They’re experiments,” Sherlock said from the doorway, his tone decidedly put-upon.

“Well, I’d say they’ve all definitely gone off,” Ford said, delicately poking one experiment with the handle of a spatula. “I’d willingly pay professional cleaners to come in and sterilize this place.”

“You can afford professional cleaners?” Sherlock asked, raising an eyebrow as he took in his twin’s old and worn clothes.

“When someone actually works for Mycroft, instead of doing volunteer work like you, they get hazard pay,” Sherrinford replied, smirking. “I’ve got a healthy bank account after all the crap I’ve been through for him. I only dress like I’m homeless.”

“Speaking of which, where are you staying?” Sherlock examined a few of the experiments closely then binned some of them, much to Ford’s surprise.

“In John’s old room, for now. I’ll chip in for rent, though considering all your clothes are designer, I doubt you need help there.” Ford opened the fridge and regretted that decision as soon as he saw the bag of eyeballs on the top shelf. “This can’t be sanitary.”

“Don’t you have a flat somewhere?” Sherlock asked, decidedly annoyed.

“I didn’t see the point after I started working for Mike. I’m away from London most of the time, in one shite hotel room or another. The life of a spy isn’t nearly as glamorous as the Bond movies would have people believe.”

“You’re welcome to stay in John’s room for as long as you’re in town.” Both men heard a knock on the door downstairs. Sherlock moved to the window and looked out then quickly turned to his twin, his expression a bit anxious. “In fact, why don’t you go up there now?”

“If you need me out of the way while you talk to a client, just say so.”

“Not a client,” Sherlock said quickly, “still want you out of the way. Shoo!” He was practically pushing Ford out the door then froze as voices were heard coming up the stairs.

“Sherlock has a twin?” asked a female voice Ford didn’t recognize. “I don’t believe it.”

“Believe it,” Mrs. Hudson replied, amused. “I couldn’t believe my eyes at first. Same eyes, same cheekbones.”

“Same black curls?” the first voice asked.

The women had reached the landing, giving Ford a clear view of them. Mrs. Hudson held the promised tea tray, including an entire plate of Penguins. The other woman was younger, her reddish-brown hair in a ponytail, a white cardigan with embroidered cherries covering a pink blouse, and slightly-wrinkled khakis completing her attire. Both women looked up at the twins, the younger woman’s brown eyes widening. Ford realized the second woman had to Molly Hooper, one of Sherlock’s “goldfish,” according to Mycroft.

While they were coming up the remaining steps, Sherlock took the opportunity to none-too-gently shove Ford towards the stairs to the upper bedroom. “Molly, my twin brother, Sherrinford. Sherrinford, Molly Hooper, my pathologist. Sherrinford was just going to take a nap.”

Ford planted his feet, grinning from ear to ear. “Actually, I just woke up from a nap.” He held out his hand to Molly, who still looked amazed. “Please, call me Ford.”

“Alright,” she said, smiling a bit. “Sherlock never told me he had a twin. You’re fraternal?”

Ford smirked. “Identical, actually.” At Molly and Mrs. Hudson’s confused looks, he continued. “Lock dyes his hair, has since uni.”

“I was tired of everyone confusing the two of us,” Sherlock muttered, his cheeks slightly pink.

Sherrinford turned to Mrs. Hudson, smiling appreciatively at the Penguins. “Mrs. Hudson, you’re a saint.” He relieved her of the tea tray. “Will you be joining us?”

“I would but I’m going to the hospital to see Mary,” she said. “Molly was just there and said she’s currently awake.”

“Give her my love,” Sherlock said quietly then walked into the sitting room, Molly following him.

Ford looked at Mrs. Hudson worriedly. “He can’t even talk to her?”

“John confiscated her mobile,” Mrs. Hudson replied, wringing her now empty hands. “He’s treating her like a child he’s grounded, it’s terrible.”

“Try to talk John ‘round, Mrs. Hudson,” he said gently. “I’ll see what I can do from this end. We can’t let Sherlock’s family split apart.”

She nodded, her eyes sad. “I’m so glad you’re here, Ford. Sherlock needs someone to keep an eye on him.”

“I promise I’ll do my best.”

Back inside the sitting room, Ford found Molly seated on the sofa and Sherlock pacing the floor in front of the coffee table. He set the tray on the table then sat down on the sofa, keeping a respectful distance from Molly.

“I’ll be Mum,” Molly said as she started fixing the tea. “How do you take it, Ford?”

“No milk, two sugars,” Ford replied. At her curious look, he added, “I can’t always get milk when I’m abroad, so I learned to like my tea without it.”

“What is it that you do, exactly?”

Sherrinford glanced at Sherlock, who shook his head slightly. He turned back to Molly. “I work for Mycroft.”

She smiled a bit. “Say no more. Something tells me I’m going to want plausible deniability.”

Ford chuckled. “Smart move.”

Molly handed Ford his tea then held out a cup to Sherlock, who had finally stopped his pacing. Sherlock took it and raised an eyebrow at his twin. Ford took the hint and moved to the chair next to the sofa. Sherlock sat next to Molly, who just smiled over the wordless exchange between the brothers.

“How is Mary?” Sherlock asked.

Molly opened her mouth to reply but was cut off by the sound of Sherlock’s mobile ringing from its place on the coffee table. The number wasn’t one he or Molly recognized.

“You should take it,” she said. “It’s probably a client.”

Sherlock pushed the button, leaving the phone on the coffee table. “This is Sherlock Holmes.”

“Sherlock, it’s Mary. Is Molly with you?”

“Yes,” Sherlock replied, relief evident on his face. “My brother Sherrinford is here too.”

“You have another brother?”

“My twin. Unimportant right now.” He ignored Ford’s eyeroll. “How do you feel?”

“I can definitely sympathize with how you felt when you were shot,” Mary said. They heard her laugh weakly then gasp. “Bloody hell, that hurt. Don’t make me do that again.”

“Noted. You’re calling from the room phone?”

“Yes, John took my mobile. I told him he was being ridiculous but he didn’t care. I convinced him to take a walk to stretch his legs, I don’t know how much time I have. Sherlock, I’m giving you a case.”

“What case?” Sherlock asked, immediately intrigued.

“I need you to save John. All of this is tearing him up inside. He needs you, Sherlock. To make him realize it, I need you to put yourself in extreme danger. Find a bad guy, a really bad guy. Go after him publicly. Fall into his clutches. John will save you.”

“You can depend on me, Mary,” Sherlock said firmly.

“He’s coming back, I’ll talk to you when I can.” The line disconnected.

Ford and Molly looked at Sherlock, who was already going into his Mind Palace. Ford reached out and grabbed a couple of Penguins from the plate.

“I suggest you get comfortable, Molly,” he said. “We may be in for a long wait.”

#writing #sherrinford to the rescue

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thedenimdentist · 5 years

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Parkhurst: Unboxing & First Impressions

Introduction

Parkhurst is a small boot company owned by Andrew Svisco in Buffalo, New York. Consisting of just eight boot makers, Parkhurst aims to produce a line of dress casual boots using primarily US-based materials and leathers. Their boots are designed to unite a sleek and refined aesthetic with a rugged, long-lasting construction, all at a price point more reasonable for most non-boot enthusiasts.

What I Ordered

First off I just want to thank Andrew for gifting me a pair of his boots to test out. Andrew reached out to me via Instagram back in November 2019 about sending me a pair of his boots to test. At that point, I had seen some of his boots on social media, but didn’t know too much. After browsing his Instagram and website, his Allen boot in Spruce Kudu leather really caught my eye. The texture and character of kudu leather had always intrigued me, and the green color was unlike anything else in my collection. The boot was out of stock for quite a while, but he was finally able to get me a pair in February 2020.

Based on the Parkhurst website, this boot comes with the following specifications:

The Allen - Spruce Kudu

Construction – Goodyear welted

Upper – Genuine Kudu leather tanned by CF Stead

Insole – Vegetable tanned leather

Hardware – 7 eyelets

Laces – Flat waxed

Welt – Vegetable tanned leather

Midsole – Vegetable tanned leather

Sole/Heel - Dainite Rubber

Shipping & Packaging

My boots were shipped out from New York on 2/20/2020 (Thursday) and arrived here in the Bay Area on 2/24/2020 (Monday). The boots arrived in a single brown box, which opened up directly to the boots.

It should be noted that these boots did not arrive with a standard shoe box to keep and look all cute on your closet shelf. I don’t see this as too big of a deal. The boots seemed to be adequately protected, as the single brown box was built fairly sturdy, with each boot was stored within an individual plastic bag, divided by a barrier piece of card stock.

The boots arrived with two sets of brown skinny, flat, waxed laces--the first set already laced on the boots, and the second set at the bottom of the box.

Sizing & Fit

As I stated in my Onderhoud review, my feet are very tricky when it comes to sizing (see previous review for details). Below I’ve listed my sizes for all the other boot brands I own.

Thursdays - 10.5

Onderhoud - 44E

Red Wing, Iron Ranger - 9.5EE

Truman Boot Company - 11EE

Viberg (1035 last) - 10.5

For these Parkhurst boots, I decided to go with a size 11 (in a D width, as it’s the only width they offer). After a few wears, I’ve concluded that a Parkhurst size 11 is about the same as a Thursday 10.5D, and just a hair smaller than my Truman 11EE. Not gonna lie, the Parkhursts are pretty narrow on me. I can’t say if the Parkhurst 11D is a similar width to the Truman 11D (as I only own 1EE), but they are definitely more narrow than my 10.5D Thursdays. I don’t blame Parkhurst for the lack of width options, as they are still a fairly small business, but hopefully they’ll be able to add more as they continue to grow. So while the narrower last does pinch some on my bunions, it also creates a really nice almond toe shape when viewed from above (which I will discuss later).

Pattern & Design

Andrew aimed to create a sleek and handsome boot that would be acceptable both out on the trail and at the office. This is his Allen boot design, and in my opinion he hit this one out of the park. The plain toe, the counter and heel stay, and the stitching details along the eyelets all come together to create a very simple and clean pattern. I’m also very pleased that this boot came with all seven eyelets, as I prefer eyelets over speed hooks.

Like all of Parkhurst’s boots, the Allen boot comes with a 360 degree storm welt. The welt leather is imprinted with a fudging wheel, which creates the ridges in the welt leather perpendicular to the welt stitch. Traditionally, fudging wheels were used by bespoke shoemakers to mark out where the stitches would fall on the welt. However, these are merely decorative, as the welt stitches don’t appear to follow the individual ridges (see photo). While this fudging wheel pattern is fairly common on more dress boots, this is the first time I’ve seen it in person. It definitely creates a unique aesthetic--a little busier and eye-catching than the stitchdown and GYW boots I’m used to--but it’s growing on me.

One thing I really appreciate about these boots is the fact that the insole, welt, and midsole are all made from vegtan leathers. They also come with leather-stacked heels, and are finished with very cleanly stitched Dainite soles. While I tend to prefer half soles, I actually really like the simple, low profile aesthetic of Dainite soles. I’ve heard some people complain that Dainite soles lack traction in outdoor, wet, and rainy conditions, but I’ve never had any issues. I live in a Bay Area suburb, and these Dainite soles grip the sidewalk just fine.

If there were one thing about the pattern I would change, it would be the addition of gusseted tongue. The standard tongue these boots come with (similar to my Thursday boots) tend to collapse when my foot isn’t inside. Nothing wrong with a standard tongue, but I just personally prefer the gusseted tongue, as it makes sliding my foot in a lot easier. Plus, gusseted tongues also improve the boots’ ability to keep out water, dust, and dirt...for those of you who have a more outdoorsy lifestyle than me.

Toe Shape & Last

If you follow my Instagram, you can probably tell that I prefer everything to be slim: slim fit shirts, slim fit denim, slim low profile boots. These Parkhursts are now probably the slimmest boots in my collection. Thursday Boots also designs their boots to be sleek and slim, but I actually prefer the toe shape of these Parkhursts more.

Here is a side-by-side comparison with my President boots by Thursday. And while I do prefer the Parkhurst toe shape more, I should mention that my Thursdays are currently far more comfortable. However, my Thursdays are nicely broken in and have stretched around my bunions, while I’ve only worn these Parkhursts a couple days. I’m hoping these will stretch with wear to accommodate my bunions, but only time will tell.

Here, you can see that the Parkhurst last is actually pretty similar to that of my Onderhouds (which I absolutely adore). If you look closely, you can see where Rizky added some extra give on my custom last to accommodate the bunions on the outsides of my feet.

The Leather: Spruce Kudu

This is my first time seeing kudu leather in person, and it did not disappoint. The leather is soft and supple, with a good weight to it. As for the color and texture, I’ll let these photos speak for themselves:

Something I really like about Parkhurst is their vegetable tanned leather options. They currently offer this Allen boot in Natural Dublin, and their Delaware boot in Color 8 Dublin, both of which look amazing. I’m a sucker for beautiful vegtanned leathers. (I blame @almostvintagestyle.)

Craftsmanship & Finishing

Overall, the construction of the Allen boot is pretty good. They have a decent weight to them, which I like. Put a gun to my head, I’d say they’re just a hair lighter than my Trumans if I hold them in either hand, but pretty comparable. Under close inspection, I didn’t see any loose stitches or flaws in construction that would cause me to doubt the structural integrity of the boot and their ability to withstand a beating.

(Before I describe these boots in any more detail, I just confirmed with Andrew that my pair is actually a production sample, which he says are about 90% up to what goes out to consumers. Prior to shipping, Andrew warned me that he ran short on leather lining while making my pair, so one toe box is lined with tan leather while the other is in beige. He assured me that this would never happen on boots made for paying customers, and I didn’t mind as you can’t even see the lining in the toe box anyway. I cannot say whether or not any of the other following critiques would have been prevented had these boots not been production samples, but just keep that in mind.)

With regards to the stitching, I really like the stitching pattern used on the Allen boot. The stitching along the eyelets and the neck of the boot, the 1-2 offset triple stitching along the quarter, and the double stitching on the counter all look tight without any loose stitches. There are a few places where the placement/alignment of the stitching isn’t quite perfect or symmetrical.

For example, here are the backstays of both the boots. The horizontal stitches aren’t perfectly parallel on the left, making that leather strip look a little longer than the one on the right. Is this a big deal? Does it compromise the overall aesthetic or durability of the boots? Absolutely not. I just thought it was worth noting.

Another thing I did notice when first unboxing the boots was that the left boot wasn’t quite balanced when placing them on the ground. It appears as though the left heel placement isn’t perfectly level, so the boot rocks to the left and doesn’t stand sturdy and upright. If I’m sitting and am not placing any weight on my left foot, the left boot does rock if I shake my leg back and forth (but who does that, really?). However, when standing and walking, I can’t feel any difference in my gait or balance. So it doesn’t bother me really, and it may correct itself over time with wear. (It is already less noticeable after a few wears, which is a great sign.)

(Here you can see the left boot is tilted slightly to the left.)

A third little variation between the left and right boots is the visibility of the heel counter. In both the photos above, you can see that the border of the right counter is much more defined and prominent than the left. Unlike with the heel rocking, I can’t feel any difference when on foot, and I highly doubt this has any effect on boot durability.

The last thing I really noticed was that the welts aren’t exactly aligned on either of the boots. Functionally I don’t see any need for concern--everything seems to be stitched down tight and securely, so I doubt these will be falling apart anytime soon (or ever). And because of these welt joints are in a very discrete location on the boot, they’re barely noticeable. (Also, I want to point out that imperfect welt joints are quite common. I’ve seen similar discrepancies on many other brands of boots, regardless of their price.)

Price Point

Parkhurst’s entire collection of boots range between $298-$328 (with these Spruce Kudu boots being $328). That puts Parkhurst right in between Thursday Boots (around $200) and Truman (between $400-600), and less than half the price of a Viberg boot (usually north of $700). In my opinion, the build quality and materials put into these Parkhursts are definitely worth their cost. For instance, the fact that Parkhurst offers some vegetable tanned boot options below $300 is awesome. Plus, they even use vegetable tanned leather for their insoles, welts, and midsoles. I feel like it’s not uncommon for smaller boot companies to sacrifice material quality in some of these areas in order to cut costs, but Parkhurst does not.

On the whole, I am pretty impressed by the quality of these Parkhurst boots. As far as I can tell, most (if not all) of these “imperfections” are merely cosmetic, with the largest issue being the unbalanced left boot. However, I doubt any of these will have any effect on the structural integrity or longevity of the boots. Andrew and his team built a solid boot, and while perfection is always something we should be working toward, the little handmade variations I mentioned are fairly acceptable--especially for their $300 price point.

To quote @flamepanda11, “Handmade is to achieve higher standards, not ‘hand-made defects are inevitable.’” I agree with this 100%. Being “handmade” is no excuse to be sloppy. However, I also believe that “you get what you pay for.” Are Parkhurst boots perfect? No; but for a $300 American-made, vegetable tanned boot, is it fair to expect perfection?

Conclusion

The Allen boot in Spruce Kudu is definitely a unique boot in my collection. I really like the simple pattern and sleek aesthetic, and the construction quality seems close to that of Truman for $100-200 less. Are they the cleanest boot on the market? No. But are they structurally sound and built to last? As far as I can tell right now, yes. And priced at just around the $300 mark, I believe that these boots by Parkhurst are definitely fairly priced for what they offer, and are worth looking into.

If you’d like to learn more about Parkhurst, you can follow Andrew on Instagram @wearparkhurst, or visit the online store here. Andrew is always super busy (which is to be expected when running a small business), but is a super nice guy and is very easy to talk to. He’s very transparent with what’s going on behind the scenes, so don’t hesitate to hit him up with any questions.

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I plan on writing an update review on these Parkhursts after I put more wear on them. Same for my Onderhouds. So please stay tuned for that. Anyway, hopefully this review was informative and helpful. I try to stay as objective as possible, supporting as much as I can with photographic evidence. DM me via Instagram (@thedenimdentist) with any feedback or questions you may have regarding Parkhurst, Onderhoud, or anything else denim/boots related.

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lsl-liverpool-girls-blog · 5 years

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Lily's of Liverpool - Unique and Sensational

For everybody who has been involved with LSL Liverpool Girls from the very beginnings, we introduced an amazing company called Lily’s Bespoke Candles, we had great offers from them and the ladies who bought or won their products in our giveaways absolutely loved the design and the scents they produced. Lily’s have been away for a while – going through a rebrand and are now called Lily’s of Liverpool @lilysofliverpool. So, it’s really great news, that today we can announce that they have become an offical Style Card partner, offering 20% off of all their product lines.

The concept of Lily’s of Liverpool, founded by two local ladies from Chester and Liverpool, is based on their love of candles and bespoke products, so why not combine the two. Tired of seeing the same scents every time they went shopping, they set up their own business, but instead of following the mass market, they identified a gap, letting the customer personalise their purchase, which undoubtably will be the key to their success and establishing the brand in such a competitive market. The idea of producing authentic and unique products – bespoke products, where the client makes the decisions is a real plus; we’re all unique, including our sense of smell, so why not produce products that identify with that uniqueness. This underlying concept works simply by allowing customer to make three choices, the scent, the strength and the size of the candle. With twelve scents to choose from, the strength ranging from subtle to standard to strong and the size, a choice from 20cl or 30cl product, it’s up to you. This is a simple but brilliant concept, giving people the opportunity to customise and construct around the person they’re buying for. Truly a unique and special gift.

“Just because I like certain scents, doesn’t mean we’re all going to like them; so, we give customers the chance to create their own candle.”

The centre of the business is selecting the best scents, which thought has gone into, too. Each scent is built from using fragrance and essential oils. If you don’t want to customise, you can buy off the shelf from four fabulous signature scents:

The Three Graces

Queen Mary II

Lord Sefton

Port of Liverpool

It doesn’t matter that the number of scents is limited, it’s knowing that they’re produced individually, as and when you order and that care and attention to detail has gone into the making and pouring of the product. Made from soy wax, means that you’re not going to get those nasty chemicals in the product, it’s 100% natural, with clean burning, no toxins, carcinogens or pollutants, so if you suffer from allergies, you too can enjoy Lily's of Liverpool, unlike paraffin wax, which the mass-produced market uses to produce their candles. The choice of quality and natural ingredients also means that the product can be enjoyed between 30- 50% longer than a paraffin-based candle. So, what’s not to like??

The products are packaged beautifully, from the box, the labelling, it was a real treat to open the package and find this beautifully presented box, the branding on the candles brings the product together and makes them look sophisticated, whatever room or wherever you put them. The design is simple and elegant, making Lily’s of Liverpool candles a treat for you or as a gift for somebody else.

Initially starting with candles, then came the diffusers and the100ml reed diffusers, this allowed Ashley to experiment further with scents. Along with the bespoke scents they offer signature ones too, all have a strong scent with a subtle undertone, Ashley loves experimenting, to mix scents together to create one - becoming that unique scent.

#liverpool #liverpoolgirlbusiness #lpoolblog #liverpoolgirlblog #soycandles #candles #scentedcandles #threegraces

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millababicheva · 8 years

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have more victuuri headcanons

because it’s valentine’s day and victor and yuuri are in love! always in love. just especially in love on this day. as usual, my headcanons? all over the place! but i do actually focus on their wedding details because i’m a loser, and i wanted to hop onto the bandwagon and do a thing for…

#victuuriweek (day eight: life and love)

also, i’m pretty sure this is the longest headcanon set i have ever written, and here are the others if you missed them:

part one - two - three - four - part five

i like thinking about their apartment a lot and the fact that they have an entire wall dedicated to friends, family, and at least one picture (or five) of like. every vacation they have ever been to ever.

and for all the pictures they can’t fit, they scrapbook it

pretty sure i’ve made this headcanon before but scrapbooking is just! so much fun! and it’s a more creative way of presenting all these pictures and memories and just? they love? doing things? with each other? it’s just 10x more fun

they have like a little bookshelf in their apartment just dedicated to their scrapbooks, and they love watching the shelf fill up over the years. there’s like two from the wedding, one that was a gift from phichit (because of course he would be the one to give them a scrapbook wedding gift chock-full of pics. he has all the pics) and the other is one they ended up getting put together at the end of the wedding after all the photo booth pics and it’s full of messages from all their friends and family who were in the photo and it’s just. it’s so cute. imagine it

idk about you guys, but all the weddings i’ve been to have those cute little photo booth things you go to with big goofy glasses, sparkly feather boa scarves, sequin hats, and a bunch of other fun stuff

so like. i like to imagine everyone invited just. leaving them so many pics. you got all their ice skating pals hitting up the booth several times, in different groups, just having a ball

and the most fun they have is when they finally end their rounds to every table and head on over to the photo booth to take fun pics with everyone

yuuri and victor literally?? never get tired?? their endless reserve of energy is absolutely connected to how much they love each other

they’re literally doing lifts and posing in the most ridiculous positions with phichit and chris and just!! all their friends!! but everybody is laughing out loud, everybody is dancing and having a blast

they end up with pages and pages and pages full of pics, from the katsuki family to the nikiforov family to their ice skating pals to friends to mentors to everyone!! absolutely everyone. they are all so happy i cannot possibly stress how happy their wedding night will be

okay so like. i just need to have a separate section to talk about their wedding now. i just gotta

you’re talking about a wedding between victor “i flew all of my belongings over from russia to live in an entirely different country to see you” nikiforov and yuuri “lemme just propose to you spur of the moment in this here cathedral in spain among a choir in literally the most romantic ambiance you can think off” katsuki. do u seriously think it won’t be big deal?

but of course, it’s not like it’s gigantic with so many people, but like there is a pre-wedding shoot…. several, but not all pictures made it to the magazines, of course

i am personally a big fan of @jinlian‘s hc about victor’s suit because honestly? agreed. victor’s suit is hideous but he most definitely lost a bet to yuuri for something or another

but who cares? because they had so much fun even though victor was internally screaming from the fashion atrocity he was forced to wear

but it’s only for a little while as a joke because their real suits are the top notch expensive shit

like… you’ve met victor nikiforov. he has nearly $7,000 sunglasses made of 18kt gold, and in the same pic, he’s in a multi-million dollar vintage car…

he also has a very large gold collection… you can’t possibly miss how extra and high maintenance he is come on

and it’s his wedding of all things. he’s not letting himself and yuuri walk down the aisle in drab clothing. who do you think he is

i don’t have any specific pictures in mind, but watch it be idk brioni? heck, bigger, even. alexander amosu suit

i mean…. i barely googled anything but amosu’s vanquish ii bespoke literally has buttons made of 18kt gold and valued at $101,860……. realistically, it’s a bit of a stretch, but….. this is victor nikiforov. this is yuuri katsuki. nothing can ever be a stretch.

of course they have a june wedding and coordinate the flowers and everything because why the heck not

juliet roses? lily of the valley? hydrangeas? peonies? all of it

the press won’t cover their actual wedding day, but they do have a professional camera crew and photographers basically following them around all day

my aunt did this for her wedding and it was the cutest thing so voila now victor and yuuri are doing it

and they play a mini-video at the reception and oh my god i have never seen a room so moved and just. overwhelmed with tears and happiness

i cannot possibly stress enough how much of an impact victor and yuuri’s love has on other people on their wedding night especially. everyone is just so, so happy for them. not to mention that their speeches? a mess

yuuko’s crying… takeshi’s crying…. the triplets are crying but also trying very hard to post pictures of the wedding and reception

but let’s face it… phichit has them beat, only narrowly beating chris and leo by a hair bc they, too, are instagram legends

minako is a very drunk but happy mess she’s just rlly happy for yuuri because!! she literally watched him grow up! she’s essentially a second mother to him!! she was there when he came out, when he had an anxiety attack, when he won his first gold medal! she’s just…. she’s really emotional okay

and oh man….. mari…. hiroko…. toshiya….. they are…. A Mess™ to say the least, but a very happy, crying mess and every time yuuri looks over at them with the biggest, beaming smile on his face, their hearts swell with so much happiness! and love!! it’s just so great seeing him so happy because of victor oh man

yurio…. that kid’s a mess….. he has no idea why he’s crying so much…. but he can’t stay mad or pissed because heck these are the two people who’s helped him grow as a skater, two people he’s looked up to, two people who still treat him with kindness and respect despite him being such an asshole when he first met yuuri…. he’s grown since then, but man….. he can’t imagine not having met the both of them, not having grown because of the two of them, and it just. it really gets to him!

and phichit. oh man. he’s such a happy mess of tears. he’s so happy for his best friend. really. he’s never seen yuuri so happy, and it’s the most precious thing in the whole world. he remembers when he first met yuuri, back in detroit when yuuri was in college and showing up to training everyday. heck, he even stays up late to practice sometimes and just. this is his friend. one of his best friend. someone he really, honestly truly admires and he stays up all night making that scapbook wedding gift because he loves his friend so much

and chris oh man. i like to think that he’s pretty close friends with victor, you know? and they are, i mean episode 10 is proof enough but… they probably had late night thought talks. victor probably shared a bit of his loneliness, wondering if he would find life and love, and chris looks at him now, beaming and standing by his husband’s side and all he can think is how proud he is of victor!! for finding exactly what he was looking for

victor and yuuri rarely spend any time away from each other and can’t stop looking at each other and bursting out laughing because oh! my god! we are married! can’t believe i love you so much! and i’m going to keep falling in love with you! every single day! for the rest of my life!

they literally dance through the night oh it’s so fun and wonderful seeing them together can you just. imagine. the laughter. the beaming smiles. the speeches.

yuuri and victor swear to each other happy, and though they know that there will be plenty of bumps on the road, they still make each other happy. they still love each other

at the end of the day, victor and yuuri decide that it’s all that really matters. and they would never go back to change a single thing

#angel writes #victuuriweek #this is sooooooo long ohmygosh but i loved writing it lemme tell you #i adore weddings so much okay #one of my best childhood memories is from my aunt's wedding and it was the most magical thing ever #but i'll let the venue be vague~ because i couldn't decided whether or not they wanted to do a beach wedding or something indoors #probably something indoors bc victor will complain about SAND getting in his shoes #but idk where exactly but it will be in hasetsu.... maybe.... *eye emoji*

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identybeautynet · 3 years

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How to turn ethical beauty into a business 21

How to turn ethical beauty into a business SKINIRVANA founder Mary-Rose Lobo Mary-Rose has been shortlisted for the Natural Health Beauty Awards (Image credit: mary-rose lobo) Mary-Rose Lobo, 40, lives in Hove with their daughter Anaïs, six. She is the founder of SKINIRVANA, an ethical beauty oil designed to nourish, protect and hydrate skin. The idea As a teenager, I struggled with acne and rosacea. Working part-time in a cafe, I spent all my wages on skincare, convinced the more I spent, the clearer my skin might be. In my 20s things got worse and for the first time, I read the ingredients on the products I was liberally applying to my face. I was shocked by the long list of toxic, chemical compounds so I started embracing ethical beauty by making my own blend of nourishing, natural oils which I massaged into my face twice daily. Within a month, my skin was unrecognizably nourished and radiant. I vowed never to use any products except my own ever again. In January 2014 I opened a salon in London, offering bespoke oil blends and facial massage. But two years later, I moved to Hove in Sussex and closed the salon. While I was busy settling into our new life, clients from London were getting in touch and begging me to make them up a bottle of my mix of oils. I decided to work out what I believed to be the ultimate blend of seven pure plant and seed oils and, in July 2017, launched SKINIRVANA Business Breakdown (Image credit: Mary-Rose Lobo) Start up costs: £12,500 Comprising... - Design: £2,000 - Ingredients and packaging: £5,000 - Marketing and PR: £5,000 - Admin: £500 Turnover: £25,000 Website: skinirvana.co.uk What happened next I borrowed £5,000 from my brother to buy the initial ingredients in bulk from an ethical wholesaler. My recipe includes geranium bourbon to balance and moisturize, neroli, which reduces inflammation and irritation, and juniper berry, a fantastic antiseptic with incredible healing properties. I chose not to outsource production or try to grow too quickly, making the oils in small batches myself, so there’s no wastage. The recyclable glass bottles go into handmade cotton pouches that decompose in compost within five months. Big brands manufacture in bulk and stock is stored in warehouses, often reaching the consumer years later. If the product is not sold, it goes to a landfill. SKINIRVANA customers receive the freshest product within weeks, even days, of production. A retail consultant advised me to bring out a cleanser, moisturizer, and make-up remover but I refused, believing the beauty oil I had created was all anyone needs. Further lines may have increased profits but I don’t want to create unnecessary products. Breakthrough moment When I closed my salon and left London for the south coast, I was so busy resettling I didn’t have time to think about what I was going to do next. But I was so inundated with requests from old clients, I couldn’t ignore the fact I had a product people really wanted. It was amazing to launch an ethical beauty business knowing there was already demand. “I want to make each bottle myself and find customers who believe in my philosophy” Steepest learning curve I spent thousands on marketing in the first year and it proved an entirely futile and expensive lesson. The most rewarding way to reach new customers was to attend wellness festivals and give demonstrations and facial massage workshops while telling my own story. I don’t want to take over the world and sell thousands of bottles a week, I want to make each bottle myself and find customers who believe in my philosophy. Where I am now I’ve been shortlisted for the Natural Health Beauty Awards. I’m learning facial acupuncture and will keep demonstrating facial massage and reflexology in my online membership area. I sell on my own website, as well as Organa Beauty & Wellbeing, Amazon and Wellbeing Sisters. Customers tell me my oil blend has changed their complexion and their lives. I know how awful it feels to have bad skin and how much of a relief it is to heal. I’m delighted my experience might help others. Best advice? Start small and grow as demand grows. More from woman&home: Ksoni co-founders Banasa Williams and Joti Sohi Banasa (left) and Joti share a dream to help save the planet (Image credit: Banasa Williams) Banasa Williams, 41, lives in north London with husband Sebastian, 43, and her step-children. Banasa co-founded the plastic-free haircare range Ksoni with Joti Sohi, 34. The idea A mutual friend suggested Joti and I meet, as I had experience in retail and Joti was running a gourmet samosa business. We met on my office rooftop one beautiful sunny day in June 2018, spent 15 minutes talking samosas before our shared enthusiasm for treating the planet kindly led us off on a tangent. Joti had recently been in South East Asia where she’d seen plastic waste floating in the ocean. She had taken to diving with a bag and attempting to collect litter but it felt futile. Keen to address her own contribution to the problem, she’d made changes in the kitchen, but found bathroom product swaps more of a struggle. I already made my own ethical beauty products to counter the waste problem. We discussed the shocking fact that 90% of kitchen products are recycled but only 50% of bathroom products are. By 2050 it is estimated there will be more plastic than fish in the sea. For us, sustainability is about wanting to make changes where you can. One place where you easily can is the bathroom. The idea for a plastic-free haircare brand in the spirit of ethical beauty was born. Business Breakdown (Image credit: Ksoni) Start up costs: £18,000 Comprising... - Marketing: £1,000 - Materials and packaging: £11,000 - Formulations research and development: £5,000 - Printing and postage: £1,000 Turnover: £50,000 Website: ksoni.co What happened next We spent a year researching “product-market fit” to ensure there was an audience for a liquid shampoo in a plastic-free container. The bathroom should be a sanctuary, so we infused the range with essential oils to give customers a mood-enhancing aromatherapy experience. We opted to use aluminum cans because they are infinitely recyclable and can be back on the shelf just 60 days after recycling, but also because shampoo in a can is a fun and unusual experience. In October 2019, we launched Ksoni, which means “earth” in Sanskrit. Breakthrough moment We’d been to a few trade shows but the Zero Waste Goods Market in London was special—and we seemed to have the right product at the right time, in the right place. We had our best sales day yet and it felt like the time and money we’d invested was worth it because we had made something people loved. “It’s important to balance profit and purpose and be part of a community driven by the very best practices” Steepest learning curve Like many small businesses, we panicked when the UK went into the first lockdown as a result of the coronavirus pandemic. We were only a few months into trading and had been steadily gaining momentum at shows and markets, with many more events in the diary. But we pivoted online, figuring out how to recreate the experience of meeting customers and giving them a sense of discovery, digitally. I would not want to repeat the pandemic period but we knew people were at home, wondering what they could do to play their part in a more sustainable future and we worked hard to reach them and tell our story. (Image credit: Ksoni) Where we are now We wanted to infuse the ethos that nothing matters more than the planet from the start, so we applied to become a certified B Corporation, which means we meet a high standard of verified social and environmental performance. It’s important to balance profit and purpose and be part of a community-driven by the very best practices. We work in the spirit of continuous improvement, listening to customers to improve our range. We’re stocked on our own website as well as Wolf & Badger, Amazon, and independent retailers. Our favorite is Janet’s Life, a pop-up and internet marketplace for women of color. They champion us and we’re so grateful. Launching just months before the pandemic, I’m so proud of us for surviving and hopeful for what’s to come. Best advice? Research your market so you know there are enough people who will buy your product. Awake Organics founder Melissa Kimbell Melissa's confidence has grown with her brand (Image credit: Awake Organics) Melissa Kimbell, 42, is the founder of Awake Organics. Originally from Saskatchewan, Canada, Melissa lives with husband James, 46, and children Sophie, 15, and Ben, 14, in Northamptonshire. The idea When we settled in the UK five years ago, the landscape for natural skincare and ethical beauty was bleak. There were no basics, such as deodorant and shampoo, that were made with healthy, natural ingredients. Plus everything was sold in plastic bottles. I’d been making my own soap, body wash, and moisturizers for years so I knew how to make natural products that worked and I could see there was a need for everyday products that were good for you and easy on the planet. What happened next In October 2018, I launched Awake Organics with a face cream, serum, and an ethical beauty deodorant. I had worked as a graphic designer and studied web development so I had a knack for design and building a website, which saved money. I had no customers but learned how to set up as a seller with Amazon and that really helped, especially as there weren’t many independent sellers on Amazon back then. Slowly, I built a reputation and customers kept returning. As I made everything myself, I could test new ideas without having to order 10,000 units from a manufacturer, which kept risk and cost down. Business Breakdown (Image credit: Melissa Kimbell) Start up costs: £6,000 Comprising... - Production and development: £4,250 - Marketing, website fees and software: £1,000 - Insurance and accountancy: £750 Current turnover: £130k Website: awakeorganics.co.uk Breakthrough moment Last year, I invented the UK’s first plastic-free, water-activated shampoo concentrate. One tiny 55g bottle is equal to 350ml of regular shampoo, a blend of caffeine, guarana seed, and rosemary, it’s designed to boost volume and reduce hair thinning and loss. It was a problem I was dealing with myself, which is why I started tinkering with the idea. Once I’d cracked the formula, I could hardly keep up with demand. Customers came for the shampoo, couldn’t believe how good it was, then came back to try other ethical beauty products. Steepest learning curve I started at the kitchen table, making little pots of beautiful things. When we moved into a 1,500 sq ft barn conversion last year, scaling up was challenging as small and large batches don’t always behave the same way. (Image credit: Melissa Kimbell) Where I am now The quality and sustainability of ingredients is paramount but packaging matters too. Awake Organics is plastic-free and we are committed to a small supply chain, with almost 100% of our suppliers based in the UK. Our packaging and cartons are made seven miles away with biodegradable veggie ink. So much care goes into every step of production and every ingredient must meet at least one of five criteria. They must be Soil Association Certified Organic, Fair Trade, Wild-Crafted, Food Grade/Local Organic, and Biodegradable. It would be cheaper to buy lesser ingredients but I believe you pay in other ways, by burdening the planet or contributing to terrible working conditions in other countries. If we start with the best ingredients, it translates into the best final product. We’re certified Cruelty Free by Leaping Bunny, the best assurance a company has made a genuine commitment to ending animal testing. “Sometimes I have to pinch myself because I have my dream job” We’re about to launch a hibiscus and peppermint scalp scrub that stimulates hair follicles. It’s a game-changer and probably my favorite product yet. We’re stocked in Selfridges and dozens of gorgeous independent businesses throughout the UK and online. Sometimes I have to pinch myself because I have my dream job. My confidence has grown with the brand, so where once I used to wonder what I might be able to achieve, now I ask myself what I want to achieve. Whatever I’m doing seems to be working so I just keep setting the bar higher in the ethical beauty stakes. Best advice? You don’t need to invent something new, but you do need an original spin and your product needs a reason for being. beauty tips: How to turn ethical beauty into a business, beauty tips: How to turn ethical beauty into a business, beauty tips: How to turn ethical beauty into a business, beauty tips: How to turn ethical beauty into a business Read the full article

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