#i relate to him becaue he has layers and i can relate to him at parts

[eyestrain-addict]

I just realized why lestat marked Tom, like the big stupid idiot I am

(I know everyone else probably already figured this out, but this is MY blog and I get to post whatever deranged thought crosses my pea brained mind.)

When I watched that scene in episode 5 where they're at the bar talking to Tom, I was confused as to why exactly. Why does Lestat mark Tom? If he's marked to kill, why does he wait almost 2 decades later? Well I realized, as all realizations come, in the shower.

Lestat has been planning on killing Tom the whole time.

(Warning before you click read more, this post is a lot longer than I first intended holy fuck)

Well not the whole time. Just right when Louis realized that Anderson and Fenwick had screwed him over. Maybe even longer if he knew it was a trick ("ridiculous of you to mix human and vampire business it always ends poorly"). Notice how he's upset with louis when he kills the guy who's microaggressive with him, cus lestat wasn't there (even if he was there I have my doubts Lestat would understand microaggressions, but he would have definitely killed him for touching Louis.) But tells Louis he's proud of him for killing Alderman. I think this has to be because he witnessed the disrespect first hand. He didn't give a fuck about the money, what he DID care about was that those two disrespected not only him, but Louis.

Even with Lestats little understanding of race relations of the time in America, he did understand hierarchys. He's from 1700s France for God's sake. It's no coincidence wanted to be king of mardi gras. Lestat came to New Orleans and saw himself as the king, even if no one knew it. And he wanted Louis to be his queen. Honestly I could make an entire other post about how Lestat almost literally saw himself as if he was a King and Louis his beloved Queen, which is why he thought it was okay for him to sleep with other women (mistresses and playthings of the king should mean nothing compared to the queen in lestats eyes) but that's getting off topic. I only bring that up because I'm trying to paint a picture of how I think Lestat sees disrespect done to Louis. To him that goes beyond disrespect or rudeness, it's irreverence.

You begin to notice if you watch scenes with them together. Because while I wouldn't say lestat is good at controlling his anger, he's definitely great at concealing it until it erupts (props to Sam Reid have to be given here) lestat is always on the verge of fury when talking to Tom. It starts as a distaste then as he begins to fall more in love with Louis and become more protective of him, his anger builds. Claudia was wrong about one thing, it was no petty slight that was the reason Lestat killed Tom first, it was a loooonng time coming.

I could list every detail I think supports this but I'm sure you get the gist by now. My main point is really the layer of complexity this adds to not only the story, the characters, but also lestat and louis' relationship. Consider it for a second, Lestat saw all his violence as justified, everything he did one can see it through the lense of him punishing the disrespectful (take a shot every time I say disrespect in this post jesus christ). "I bring death to those deserving" indeed. Lestat has a god complex out the wazoo, and every attack, torture, and death he caused was righteous to him and thus enjoyable. Louis on the other hand didn't see himself so highly. He may seem confident but if you look through the cracks it's apparent Louis's self worth in near nonexistent and he's horribly insecure. I think lestat thought when Louis was made a vampire he would see himself as Lestat saw himself, and as Lestat saw Louis. But again, another post for another time.

Despite Louis' insecurities (or perhaps because of them) louis revels in the violence lestat commits for his sake. That's probably why louis is so quick to forgive lestat about the priests. For a brief moment Lestat truly said the truth to Louis and Louis could forgive him because of it. As lestat says, he doesn't kill the priests to intimidate Louis, nor does he do it just because he enjoys it. He does it because he sees them as humiliating Louis, charlatans that don't deserve Louis' sorrow. Louis didn't want the priest's to die, but he could understand why lestat killed them, simply because for once in his goddamn life lestat told the truth, and louis loved that truth. That truth being that lestat killed and mutilated and committed such horrors not just because he liked it, but because he did it out of a fucked up sense of protection. Him killing the priests was essentially a knight killing a dragon to earn the princess' hand in marriage.

The worst part is that Lestat doesn't even realize it. Not fully anyway. Let's be honest with ourselves, lestat doesn't understand Louis. Obviously there's the race, background, culture differences that lestat doesn't understand nor seems inclined to try, but there are better posts about that made by smarter people than moi. I'm mostly talking about lestat doesn't understand louis' mind itself (louis' mind in a vacuum I suppose you could say) he understands Louis' desire for violence sure, but he doesn't understand the core of that want. Honestly I'm on the fence of if he ever understood that Louis loved it when lestat was protective in the first place. I guess it can be dumbed down to Louis wants Lestat to kill to protect Louis and to protect the family (and anyone who deeply disrepects them), lestat perhaps understood a little at one point, but since he sees everyone as a threat and everything is a slight to him, he has no trouble and qualms with delighting in the torture of people Louis views as innocent. Louis' heart is a bit dark, but ultimately human, so he's disgusted by lestats violence towards the undeserving. Lestat can no longer read Louis' mind and even if he could, Louis doesn't quite understand the difference himself (that's why he tries to hunt for criminals briefly) so the cracks of miscommunication starts to form, and neither of them even realize there is miscommunication.

Therein lies the importance of Tom Anderson for season 1. Not much of a character, more of a plot device in human skin. Claudia can see that Lestat hates him, but doesn't understand why, nor does she care to get to the depths of that. (*Mr house voice* understandable) I think it's notable that Louis rarely brought him up, he didn't understand the depths of lestats love. Nor did he know about Lestats 3 decade long grudge, all because Tom disrespected Louis.

Now I'm not excusing Lestat's actions, I just think it's interesting how this one throwaway character reveals a whole level of complexity to the relationship between him and Louis, and better sheds light on not only Lestats personal philosophy but louis' as well. Even Claudia to a degree.

Anyway, uh. End of essay. Bye.

[popculturebuffet]

Amphibia Reviews: Toad to Redemption and Maddie and Marcy

Hello all you happy people! And welcome back to my weekly coverage of Amphibia! And today we have a suprisingly important Toadstool episode.. and a MADDIE AND MARCY EPISODE. Guess which one i’m actually excited about. But regradless it’s a good batch this week so join me under the cut for my thoughts with spoilers

Toad to Redemption: A not half bad episode, this one concerns everyone’s faviorite Monopoly Man Fried Chicken Baby, as it turns out he’s finally grown a heart. It turns out the Toad Tower incident.. actually changed him as a person. I’m as shocked as you. I mean he’s still a greedy corrupt hick, you can’t paint a gopher orange and call it a basketball... 

Look i’ts a long story i’m legally barred from talking about. Point is Toadstool is a greedy asshole but one who cares about his consituents now and actually enjoys the town and taking care of it. In return the citzens actually like him now: they may of rightfully tried to vote him out but his genuine attempts at doing good, in this episodes case spending money on potholes instead of a Jacuzzi for him and Toadie and helping fix a falling sign, have made him actually beloved. 

Naturally though, it’s not that easy and a newt comes down to give him the job running Toad Tower, and him refusing it would mean time in prison. Because as if we needed the reminder, The Newt ruling class sucks and so far the only person we’ve seen related to the castle who isn’t either hiding an edltrich demon,  a snob, or some form of hired goon is Marcy, whose blind to all of that. I do wish Marcy was in this episode for that reason, as i’m waiting for her to finally see the downside of the king and the people she’s been working for, but I get why not: it’d make the episode too easy, and distract from the character it’s actually about and to the episodes credit they wrote her out well enough: She’s studying Frobo all day. 

So the Mayor begs Anne, who showed up with a bunch of parking tickets from Hop Pop (And ones from when they were out of town no less), for help. She only ends up agreeing becaue his puppy dog eyes are so ungodly unsettling she just wants it to stop but I presume getting those parking tickets cleared up is part of it. 

So it goes as you’d expect: THe Plantars try to make him look bad, it dosen’t work. Though to Toadstool’s credit despite the hefty punishment he does prepare to tell the newt lady off after she explains Toadie won’t be going with them. You can do a LOT to Toadstool but no one is a condescning bitch to his husband-minon and gets away with it! 

But then the three toads from last season show up, the ones Anne fought, lead by Bog that pointy guy. Look i’ts been almost two years. and felt like 90. The Toads have become Bandit’s since leaving Grime behind, which.. you.. you could’ve done that and had a consistent base of operations and a home in the frog alps. So naturally a fight breaks out but Toadstool bluffs htem to throw them off guard and the town easily fights them off. 

Thankfully Toadstool gets out of things. Jacinda, said newt lady, finds him too soft for the job and puts Bog in charge.... so.. yay? No.. not really no yay here none. So while our heroes goad themselves for yet another enemy on the docket, the town confirm how much they care about Toadstool, Toadstool caresses toady and I die a little on the inside. 

Toad to Redemption is decent. It’s not the best of this half of the season but it does speak to how this half has been far better, with the return to wartwood giving us far more character stuff that had been lacking, and notably focusing more on the side cast. Speaking of whiccchhhhh

Maddie and Marcy Look unless this episode screwed up horribly somehow, this episode already had my good will just by teaming up two of my faviorites: As i’ve made clear Marcy is endlessly relatable to me as an awkward nerd myself and Haley brings her a-game every time. As for Maddie she was an instant faviorite from her first apperance being married off to Sprig, with her spotlight episode “Cursed!” being one of my faviorites of the series thus far, and a generally great one that fleshed her out from a creepy but endearing backgroudn character with sinsiter intent. to a nice if spooky little girl who uses the darkest magics for the greatest goods. 

So the two were a natural to not only get a spotlight together, but also in something the show lampshades one that’s mostly devoid of the main cast. Anne, Sprig and Hop Pop all only show up for quick gags, and the story is entirley around the titular Duo. And safe to say my hype was warranted: This is one of the standouts of the season by a long shot and one of the funniest episodes this season, while giving Maddie even more depth and allowing Marcie to play a supporting roll this go round. 

Maddie is working on her biggest spell yet: to raise the dead. Frankenstein styles. But her sisters keep begging her for attention and eventually get bored and spill her carefully prepared cauldron causing her to snap at them. It is however a nice layered conflict: This is very important to Maddie and rightfully so as this is her first level 2 spell, and she was specifically asked to do it by one of the neighbors. And it’s not like this is something she can half ass... if done right you get frakenweenie if done wrong you get pet semetary. It’s a very fine line. This is her passion, her calling as she puts it later when she explains her backstory. The issue is she treats her sisters like babies and ignores them due to this passion.. it’s fine to have passions but you have to make time for those who matter. I’ts fine she dosen’t spend as much time with her sibs as she used to, juggling them and flashback Maddie is fucking precious... but she has to make some for them. They love her. They have to understand how important this is to her and she has to understand how important she is to them. 

So Maddie skulks off to get get some suplies, and Marcy is impressed as she’s been looking for a magic user and tries introducing herself.. and gets set on fire. But the two quickly bond: Marcie’s been looking for a teacher in magic being a fan of something resembling harry potter... I really feel for this show as i’ts clear the creators were fans from this episode’s tiny shout out to it and the first temple’s bigger one, and they clearly had no idea any of this would happen. None of us did. So we get a bonding montage which is the best scene of the episode and the funniest scene of the season, and very possibly the series, thus far. The two find slime, ticks, a corpse (Or rather hop pop whose annoyed they thought he was a corpse), digging up some graveyard soil next to some confused mourners and best of all “assorted limbs” which while I have the image up front I can’t resist sharing again..

This.. is easily the best thing the series has ever produced. Their just so fucking precious. They also high five each other as new best friends. The triplets though aren’t happy about any of this, not getting that shared intrests are a thing and what not and instead plot to get big. Look there are easier ways to do that: asking zoltar.. or a groovy ant who wants you to do a rap number. 

They instead use one of Maddie’s spells without asking and also vandalize her book because their babies.. she snaps at them again and they plan to grow big. Meanwhile Marcie and her beloved apprentence work on tampering in frog’s domain and successfuly do a necromancy.. only for the now giant sized triplet #1 to bound in.. followed by #’s 2 and 3. Our two heroines run for their lives from the giant babies, and Maddie is panicked as she now realizes what they did.. and that without proper ballance, the spell will cause them to explode. 

So while the triplets grasp with the expansion and inetivible kaboom, Maddie has Marcie prepare an antidote for four.. and goes alll giant man to calm them, juggling them adorably one last time. Peace is restored and Maddie agrees to get a better work life ballance. 

Maddie and Marcy as I said is one of the standout sof the season and easily my faviorite so far, being funny while having great character work, which is when the show’s at it’s best. or dramatic and great character work. either way this one was a treat.

Next Week: Our heroes seek out a second temple, while our anti-heroes seek out a legendary hammer.

[everythingsinred]

Let's Talk About NatsuMikan: The Anime (pt. 4)

The anime is a different species than the manga, something that frequently happens during the adaptation from page to screen. Since they’re so different, I’ll analyze them separately.

In the last few parts, we talked about NatsuMikan's story divergence in the anime, and how an even minor change can seem pretty significant with added context. Here, we'll be exploring just two episodes, but two episodes that are pretty layered and have plenty of stuff to analyze!

Episode 18 vs. Chapter 21

The haunted house episode was pretty well-adapted in the anime. They did a good job of elongating the events and filling up the timespan of an episode while keeping the events interesting and suspenseful. I love the addition of Sumire and Jinno (especially with the discovery that he’s easily frightened). Jinno electrocuting the house and causing the electric problems makes a lot more sense than Iinchou passing out due to fear and coincidentally falling on the generator. In any case, the anime makes Natsume’s jealousy when Mikan clings to Ruka more clear.

The anime adds Natsume shielding Mikan from the wall when it falls, something that I always thought was cute, especially when Mikan reveals she had been awake but in shock and Natsume reacts with frustration. It further proves Ruka’s point from earlier in the episode that despite Natsume’s attitude, he is actually selfless. He will do selfless things and then act like they didn’t happen, like they didn’t bother him, etc., even if they resulted in something serious, like his leg being injured.

It just…. keeps me going.

Much of the events are the same but with minor tweaks, such as Natsume just seeing Mikan’s underwear instead of kicking her skirt up. The anime also has a much less suggestive scene for Iinchou and Ruka to walk in on. In the anime, Mikan is simply hanging over Natsume. Natsume is even flinching away from her. Leave room for Jesus.

The difference though.

The episode starts with the tea scene, as well, unlike in the chapter, and it concludes with Mikan discussing with Ruka her dream of seeing her grandfather again and becoming a strong alice. Ruka doesn’t share his dream, but we see a glimpse of it: living on a farm with many animals and Natsume, his best friend, and Mikan. There’s also more emphasis on the parallels between Natsume and Ruka’s friendship with Hotaru and Mikan. The manga does explore these similarities on its own time, but the anime jumps right in. No, they aren’t perfect mirrors of each other, but there are parallels. But Mikan and Ruka aren’t the only ones who have much in common. And just like Natsume and Mikan have a lot in common, so do Ruka and Hotaru, one of the sadly unexplored relationships in both the anime and the manga. But that’s not what this essay is about so we will move on ;-;

Episode 19 vs. Chapter 23 & 24

The next episode is the play one. There is more suspense leading up to the reveal of Ruka’s role in the Somatic play and more humorous additions to fill the episode. It adds Mikan scolding Natsume for being selfish when he refuses to dress as a cat for the play, giving him one more incentive in addition to “Narumi told him to” and “the kid is sad”. Just like in the manga, but with more emphasis, Mikan is the only girl unafraid to call Natsume cute and affectionately tease him for his outfit. In the anime, she giggles as she pokes his ears and it’s very cute. Naturally, in both versions, he reacts by flicking her forehead.

Mikan is a furry becau--

And Natsume is, in both versions, the one who volunteers Mikan for the role of the prince without really thinking about the consequences (because he’s an idiot). In the anime, he’s more spiteful, acting out of revenge for having to dress up as a cat. When she tries to refuse, it’s his turn to scold her, when he reminds her that everyone’s freaked out by the sticky balls and are in the same boat.

There’s consequent jealousy (because of course there is; Natsume is an idiot). Ruka and Mikan bond over their roles and forced situations and Natsume watches from afar, probably feeling nothing but regret because he’s the one that made it all happen. Ah… how poetic. There’s an added scene where Mikan and Sumire have a fight and Sumire’s character dies in a horrible explosion (that was funny but also kind of unnecessary). The almost-kiss is much more poetic in the anime, of course. Natsume throws an apple at Mikan to stop her from kissing Ruka for the play, and Hotaru is seen assisting him by switching off the lights, signaling an end to the show. The kid to whom Natsume is attached (and whose apple was stolen) is watching him with confusion and Natsume stares at his hand so there’s no confusion who interfered with the play.

In the manga, he throws some nondescript box thing (I never got exactly what it was so feel free to tell me if you do know), but the apple is much more dramatic. The play is Snow White, and the apple is what causes the princess to fall unconscious. It’s a symbol tied to evil, and depending on how much analysis we want to go into for just the folktale by itself, it is also tied to apples being related to the knowledge of good and evil, sowing seeds of discord, etc. Natsume throws an apple at Mikan to stop the kiss, because the story and the play is not as important to him. What caused the princess to fall unconscious is what could potentially--in play universe--keep her unconscious, because if she doesn’t get the kiss, she doesn’t wake up. But in a more Natsumikan sense, the apple sows potential seeds of discord between Natsume and Ruka. After all, after the play, Ruka knows who interfered. He knows why. He’s visibly upset about it, more sad than anything, and in the next episode there’s even more tension between Natsume and Ruka over Mikan.

The episode ends with Natsume still being jealous and Mikan and Ruka being embarrassed about what almost happened. However, Mikan and Ruka make up and decide to forget about it, and the kid takes Natsume’s hand and pulls him over to his friends. The episode concludes with them all being friends, even if there are undiscussed tensions bubbling between them all. Aww, how cute. The anime does a good job of making the love triangle seem equally balanced.

Summary

In this section, we only covered two episodes, though they were pretty interesting to discuss (also I can only put ten images in a post, I'm sorry). In these two eps, a new element is added to the story, the tension and jealousy between Natsume and Ruka, who both like the same girl and have trouble communicating with each other about it. When it comes to the anime, this tension will become very important in the next episode.

<- Previous Part Next Part ->

[takaraphoenix]

Harry Potter for the Ask Game 😂

Thanks for playing, let’s see how much I can fill for this one... xD

Top 5 favourite characters: LUNA LOVEGOOD, Hermione Granger, Draco Malfoy, Fred Weasley, George Weasley

Other characters you like: Cho Chang, Cedric Diggory, Sirius Black

Least favourite characters:the Dursleys, DOBBY, Dumbledore

Otps: Harry/Draco/Luna, Fred/Harry/George, Neville/Ginny, Luna/Ginny, Cedric/Harry, Remus/Sirius

Notps: Harry/Ginny, if we’re gonna stretch to the prequels then definitely Newt/Tina, honestly probably a lot more but I can’t think of any right now

Favourite friendships: Harry & Luna are legit my favorite dynamic, Harry & Hermione and damn I wish I would have gotten to see that Ron & Harry friendship book-readers keep claiming but the movies really didn’t sell it much...?

Favourite family:the Weasleys

Favourite episodes: doesn’t have episodes xD

Favourite season/book/movie: The Order of the Phoenix

Favourite quotes:uuuh I got none

Best musical moment: FINALLY SOMETHING WITH AN ACTUAL MUSICAL. *^* Okay, so, quite clearly one can not pick just one. But maybe Harry Freaking Potter? I just, I love A Very Potter Musical and A Very Potter Sequel a whole lot *^*

Moment that made you fangirl/boy the hardest: mmh, honestly, when rewatching, every time I fangirl the hardest when I first get to see Luna ^-^ (can’t believe she only joins the plot in the FIFTH movie >_

When it really disappointed you:that Luna only joins in the fifth movie like seriously :D”““ also every time I hear how Ron is actually a far more likable character in the books??

Saddest moment: WHEN THEY KILL SIRIUS. THOSE BASTARDS ;-;

Most well done character death:uuuhm yeah no. I got nothing, I don’t find the deaths very... convincing or well done and honestly, most make me actively angry because of the avoidability

Favourite guest star: David Tennant! Does that count as a guest star??

Favourite cast member: Helena Bonham Carter

Character you wish was still alive: SIRIUS BLACK. Seriously, JKR beat Harry down in so many different ways. It... It really wasn’t necessary to give him his godfather and then kill him off. The series would have worked just fine if Harry had gotten to live with Sirius past book/movie five :D”““

One thing you hope really happens: I’d love a TV show remake, to be honest? A season per book, fixing the things that they screwed up, including more character development - seriously, Luna joins in the fifth book, but what’s nearly worse is that Harry’s endgame love interest who was in it since movie 1 has had less interactions with Harry in FIVE movies than Luna did in that one movie, like c’mon. A TV show would give so many opportunity to flesh dynamics and friendships and characters out better

Most shocking twist: uuuuh that they tried to sell Snape off as a good guy?? That was shocking because I still don’t find it very convincing :D”““

When did you start watching/reading?: I started reading the series back when the first book was first released ^^

Best animal/creature: Hedwig

Favourite location: I mean Hogwarts?

Trope you wish they would stop using: beat-down protagonist :D Seriously, the double-dead parents was already a lot, the evil overlord trying to constantly murder him, the abusive aunt and uncle, the bullying cousin, the CONTINUOUS abuse like seriously they could have gotten him out of there after he joined Hogwarts, then the bullying from a teacher like what the fuq and good gods when it finally looks as though he could catch a break... Harry’s new godfather gets killed off... it’s just... so... much

One thing this show/book/film does better than others: I mean, there clearly has to be something, otherwise it wouldn’t be so... all-consuming...? But... personally, I genuinely can’t put my finger on it; it never sucked me in the same way it did with others from my generation ^^°

Funniest moments: most things the twins do :D

Couple you would like to see: I was very pleased when the movies changed things to Neville/Luna in the end, but like... I don’t really have any ships I’d WANT to see, aside from “gay it up”, because seriously

Actor/Actress you want to join the cast: uuuh I got nothing

Favourite outfit: the outfits are kind of all rather ridiculous? Probably Hermione’s Yule Ball dress??

Favourite item: the map or the cloak

Do you own anything related to this show/book/film?: no, I don’t

What house/team/group/friendship group/family/race etc would you be in?: Ravenclaw

Most boring plotline: THE FUCKING CAMPING TRIP. I swear there was no need to split that final book into two movies you coulda cut two hours of camping trip out of it, that is such a boring-ass drag it was mind-numbing

Most laughably bad moment:I... can’t think of one right now

Best flashback/flashfoward if any: were... were there flashbacks? Beyond the “look at how Harry’s parents got killed” and “look at Snape getting bullied”? Because I don’t think so and I don’t really dig either of these

Most layered character: Hermione?

Most one dimensional character: I mean thanks to the movies not really taking time to flesh most characters out... the majority, really...? Let’s say Vernon, because I think he was just as flat an abusive bully in the books

Scariest moment: okay so for me, as a smol child reading those books, absolutely Chamber of Secrets with the voices in the walls. I had nightmares and was scared of fucking WALLS for MONTHS

Grossest moment: can’t think of one?

Best looking male: Draco?

Best looking female: Luna?

Who you’re crushing on (if any): not really, no

Favourite cast moment: I don’t really care for these things ^^°

Favourite transportation: mmmh the teleportation through fireplaces probably?

Most beautiful scene (scenery/shot wise): I really don’t know

Unanswered question/continuity issue/plot error that bugs you:HOW THE EVER LOVING FUCK DOES FANTASTIC BEASTS FIT INTO ALL THIS SHIT. The first one was still fun, but then we get fashionable young Dumbledore to join the plot and suddenly there is ANOTHER Dumbledore who was never mentioned before and got to pose as Creepy Kid From The First One?? And why would kind, sweet Queenie mind-rape Jacob and join the bad guys and also wait did the bad wizards predict WWII was going to happen and like the bad guys yeah? Becaus ehonestly WWII is a solid call-out for humanity and where the ever-loving fuck is all of this going I have a headache, I just wanted to see a sheepish ginger collecting Pokémon magical creatures, not this hot mess

Best promo: I really don’t pay attention to these things

At what point did you fall in love with this show/book: never. I mean, I don’t dislike it - I regularly rewatch the movies, am literally right now rewatching them with my adorable Draco-fangirl girlfriend - but I never fell in love with this franchise

IN DEPTH FANDOM QUESTIONS

[revivedandabandonedkids]

The Portrait of Afuro Terumi (01~05)

! Double Gods

! Unfinished 

-

01.

There's a long corridor in the deep of the mansion, and a giant room at the end of it that Father tells Hiroto to keep away from.

"Why?" He asks whenever he catches a rare chance to occupy Father's time.

The answers are different every time.

"There's a cool draft seeping through. You might catch a cold."

"There's nothing at the other end to entertain you with."

"It's a dusty dusty room. You might catch a cough."

None of them are convincing enough.

He turns to Hitomiko-nee-san once to see if he can get a more satisfactory explanation, but his sister merely rolls her eyes and say. "It's because the hall is haunted. Duh."

Hiroto can't tell if she's trying scare him off or if she's just tired of trying to come up with an excuse, but the answer sends shivers down his spine.

"Have you ever been?"

She scoffs. "Of course not. Father told us to stay out for a reason."

She's a goodie-two-shoes like that.

So Hiroto asks on.

"You might get lost in the dark."

"The door is locked and I've lost the key."

It's obvious that with the older he gets, the less patience Father has for the question. The answers turn short and clipped, when eventually it turns into a single-

"Just keep away."

And then he stops talking to Father altogether.

-

02.

His curiosity stays unquenched.

-

03.

It's easy to get bored inside the mansion.

It doesn't matter how ridiculously large a house is, once you get used to the bounds, the place settles in a quiet thrum of mundaneness, and Hiroto's spent years trapped within those walls.

It's ridiculous, how the mansion's settled on a mountain. Isn't it awfully inconvenient to get to society? Maybe the land's cheaper on the mountains, but it's not like his family lacks money, so what's the excuse there, Father?

The Kira mansion looks like one of those CGI layered Haunted House In The Deep Of The Woods On A Stormy Night in horror movies. Clearly the best place to raise your children.

Hiroto used to freak out at night when the shadows stretched too long on the ceiling and the air conditioner whirred too loudly in his spacey room, but as he grew, the fear started altering into gaping loneliness. Then even that was gone, and all that was left was emptiness.

It's a miracle that he hasn't developed some sort of emotional trauma from all the neglect.

Or maybe Hiroto is traumatized, and just doesn't know how to identify it.

He can't wait to be old enough to get his own place. A place far far far away.

And that's when Hiroto gets the first idea of the secrets residing in the house.

When he tells his future escape plans to his friend(?) Haizaki, the dark skinned underclassman only nods thoughtfully and says, “I’d be dying to move out of a cursed house too.”

Hiroto narrows his eyes. “Cursed?” That’s the second time he’s heard that word applied to his residence, but it’s the first time he’s hearing it from an outsider. “What do you mean cursed?”

“There’s a rumor.” Haizaki seems reluctant to answer. “People talk about it all the time: There’s a ghost, or an angry spirit of some sort? Anyway, it supposedly killed a bunch of dudes before finally being sealed inside a secret chamber. I wouldn’t know. I just think your house is creepy.”

Creepy it is. Cursed? Hiroto doesn’t know.

“I think I know what chamber you’re talking about.” Hiroto tells him. Because what other room would be considered as a secret chamber other than the room he’s prevented from entering?

Is that the reason it’s forbidden to him? Because his Father is a superstitious shithead? Why keep living in the house, then?

“Seriously? That chamber exists?” Haizaki’s eyes widen. “That’s freaky.”

“You wanna come see it?” Hiroto offers with a smirk.

Haizaki scoffs. “Because we both know that you don’t have the guts to poke around by yourself.”

Hiroto flushes darkly, trying to uphold some sort of composure as the elder one present. “That’s not- I’m just granting you the chance because you look interested.” So really, Haizaki should be thanking him.

Haizaki guffaws, and it’s a very unattractive voice, mind you. “I’m not risking the chance of getting cursed, rumor or not. You’re on your own, buddy.”

"You still believe in sorcery and witchcraft?" Hiroto taunts. "What a baby."

For once, Haizaki doesn't take the bait like the easily-riled-up dumbass he is, and simply retorts. "Like you're one to talk. You wouldn't be yapping at me to go with you if you weren't afraid of it yourself."

Shit. He actually has a point. Except-

"I'm not afraid." Hiroto narrows his eyes. "The only reason I haven't gone into the room is because Father explicitly told me not to."

"And you listen to him since when?"

Hiroto shuts up. He hates it when other people are right, especially if "other people" is Haizaki.

-

04.

"Why am I not allowed to go in that room?" Hiroto asks. It's been years since he last questioned about it.

"You can't just barge in here whenever you want, Hiroto." His Father has a look of displeasure on his face, probably upset since Hiroto bursted into his home office abruptly without even a knock.

"Tell me why I not allowed in. The truth. Not some half-assed lie."

"I thought you've dropped that childhood nonsense already."

Hiroto feels his throat closing up. His clenched fists shake. "Don't patronize me."

"I'm your father, Hiroto."

Hiroto scowls.

"Hitomiko-nee-san says it's haunted. There's a rumor outside that it's cursed." He says bluntly.

"There's no such thing as ghosts or curses, Hiroto. You're the heir of the Kira company. We don't indulge in fantasies or superstition." His Father furrows his eyebrows condescendingly. "You should know better."

-

05.

And that's why Hiroto's sneaking into the Forbidden Corridor, glaring at the giant door in front of him.

So there is a room here.

Well, that's pretty much a given, since a corridor leading to nowhere would be a pretty idiotic design.

It looks like a fairly plain door. It's wooden and the paint is peeled. From the bright beam of the flashlight on his phone, he can see that there's dust all over the surface of the doorknob. This place hasn't seen any visitors in a long while.

"Listen, I can't stop you if you still want to get cursed, but word of advice: Don't interact with anything. Don't touch anything. Don't respond to any noise. In and out. Higher chance of survival."

It's not like Hiroto needs survival tips from Haizaki Ryouhei. That would most likely increase his chances of getting his soul sucked out of his body or whatever.

The door makes an ominous creak when it cracks open.

It's brighter than he expected. There's a beam of afternoon sunlight spilling through a ceiling window. He turns off the flashlight.

It's an almost empty storage room. That is to say, it would be empty, if not for the enormous life sized painting strung up on the wall to the far side of the room.

It's a portrait of a person. Or maybe an ethereal being. The depicted subject sat regally in the center, with a Greek chiton draping over their slender figure. Long blonde hair the shade of melted sunlight flows down their shoulders, shrouding a pale, fair face with elegant eyebrows arching over striking red eyes and a teasing smile twitching at the edge of their mouth. Between their left fingers is an elegant wine glass, a golden fluid fills it to the brim. The background is a muddled mistiness.

It looks like a very ordinary painting. The frame has little cracks littered all over. Under the frame lays a caption:

Afuro Terumi (????) It is said that this painting brings happiness.

Hiroto snorts. Some cursed room. There's nothing but what looks like a religious painting. Is this what Father is so amendment on keeping Hiroto away from? Does Father even know what's inside this room? Why would he hang a (seemingly expensive) picture where no one could see it?

"What do you have to say for yourself?" Hiroto crosses his arms in front of his chest and tips his chin up in a mock sneer. "They say you're cursed." He says loudly, fixing his gaze on the being portrayed in the center of the canvas- Afuro Terumi, probably. "Well, they say the room is cursed, but you're the only one here, aren't you? What do you say?"

Afuro Terumi's face breaks into a wide smile. "I'd tell you they're right. I am cursed."

-[Next]

Okay just to be clear, this is still some what a wip.

I have most of the plot figured out, and have written about 1/3 of the entire story already, but I have a reputation of not finishing wips. So.

I don't know when the next part will be out yet. Keep a lookout if interested. Ignore this if not.

Bear in mind that this is written at the spur of the moment. I put like 0 effort into this, but still spent a lot of time because typing takes a considerable amount of time oof.

I am not going to apologize for putting 0 effort, because I wrote this piece purely to entertain myself. It's very very self-indulgent. And also because it's just not worth it putting too much heart into my ina eleven stories.

Nothing against the ina eleven fandom. I love this community, I really do, but it gets tiring sometimes and I don't have the energy to fight off bad emotions. I'm only trying to protect myself.

Being a fanfiction writer isn't easy work. I've been writing for roughly six years, and only recently did I come to this realization that as a writer, I don't need to write to please anyone else. It's my own opinion that matters. I write for small fandoms and very rare pairings, so feedback never comes easy. I'm sure other writers can relate. No feedback makes it way too easy to doubt oneself. That had taken a toll on my emotional health in the past, over and over again. Then I decided that I'm done with doubting myself over a hobby. So I no longer ask for comments, because I don't want to set myself up for disappointment.

There had been a time in my life that I thought I would stop writing. At least stop putting my writing online. There's just no motivation for it. But then someone came up to me and told me that they love my stories, that I'd convinced them to ship a rarepair, that they want to try writing now. That changed my mind, and helped shape my mindset the way it is today. I don't need to write for a crowd. I just need to write for myself, and the very few who enjoy my stories as well.

This rant turned out to be more personal than I'd intended, and ended on a happier note than I thought it would. So if you're still here, advice for other struggling writers: find your audience, your support system. Find those who are willing to discuss ideas with you. It gets better from there. ♡