#i watch beyond evil and my heart aches because i wonder if i'll ever have someone see me for real

[lovefairymina]

The life of an immortal is a lonely one. 

Ever since you were cursed with this eternal life, you have been forced to live and watch as time passed and the world continued changing. You witnessed how magic vanished from the world and how the last of the elves sailed west after Sauron’s defeat. You saw how the race of men took over, and how the age of kings came to an end, replaced by an age of advanced technology and pollution that crippled the world.

The stories about elves and Valars vanished from the minds that still remembered them, and soon people began to come up with new stories and theories, such as science and evolution. They proposed theories about how the universe was created by one huge blast, and how the earth beneath your feet was nothing but one big rock born through other rocks and gravitational pull.

There was no end to these new theories and stories, but they gave you a certain sense of importance and wisdom since you still remembered the truth about everything—how the world was truly created, and how somewhere beyond the world was the land of gods and immortals.

You wonder how your friends were doing since they had long sailed there. You can imagine the peace and the joy they experienced because it seemed even without evil gods and orcs, the world could still fall ill and chaotic under the rule of men. It had even become so bad that the air tasted different. 

It had been lonely living all those years, but you believed you would live till the prophesized final battle would take place and the world would be renewed. You are not sure how or when it will begin. You did imagine perhaps when that day arrived, you would finally die and join your family on the other side, but everything changed when you saw him. 

You were at the docks when there was a carnival. People were selling their goods, enjoying rides on the machines, and the children would nag their parents to buy toys and candy that were well overprized and low on quality. It was a rather gloomy day, with grey clouds in the sky and the sea wind bringing mild rain to the docks. Then you saw him standing at the wooden railings, quietly watching toward the sea. 

His hair was long and dark like the night, and when you saw his face, you knew he possessed features only possible for an elf, which nearly left you stunned.

You would have nearly mistaken him for any other person as he was dressed in modern clothing, and in his hands, he held a very old walkman. You hadn't seen one of those since the development of flip phones, especially a working one. When you took a closer look at the elf’s face, you noticed a faint yet familiar light in his eyes, similar to what you had seen in the very few ancient elves. It was a dead giveaway that he was truly an elf.

"Quite a gloomy day to listen to music," you started after you approached him. 

The elf quickly took off his earbuds after noticing you. 

"You are not worried even the slightest that your little toy gets wet in this weather?" you questioned and pointed at the walkman. 

He looked awkward for a moment. "It's fine... It has survived worse weathers," he answered quietly, his voice faint that it nearly sounded like a whisper. 

You looked at him closely. His voice sounded oddly strained. When you glanced down at his hands, you noticed a very severe-looking scar, like he had held a very hot object that had burned through his skin. 

"You seem a bit lonely. Do you come here often to listen to music and look toward the sea?" you questioned. 

"I..." he hesitated. "Well, I don't often wander in company, and coming here eases some achings in my heart," he answered. 

You looked at him curiously. 

"Is there something behind the sea you hope to reach?" you questioned. 

"Yes... A place of sorts, but it's been so long that I do not know if I'll ever be able to reach it," he replied, and then silence filled the gap between you. 

You looked at him as he continued looking toward the sea. Swiftly, you brushed his hair out of his ears and saw the sharp tips, further confirming your suspicions of him being an elf. 

He snapped toward you, pushing your hand away and hiding his ears behind his hair before anyone could notice. You two then stared at each other. 

"(I thought all the Eldar had sailed west thousands of years ago,)" you spoke in his tongue, and his eyes widened with shock. 

"(Tell me. Why hadn't you gone home?)" you asked. 

He then looked away, and you could see shadowed sorrow and regret. "(Many years ago. I committed terrible acts, so to punish myself. I went on exile,)" he answered.

He then looked toward the sea, or specifically, toward the west.  

"But now I do not know after all these years. This loneliness had crippled my mind, and I can barely keep it away with music," he spoke as he held the walkman in his hands. 

“I yearn for my family, but I do not know if the gods see me even worthy to step on their land again,” he added. 

You looked at him with pity. "Living in loneliness is a terrible thing especially if you're alone in this world," you said, looking at the sea with him. 

"I know as I have existed since the second Age of Arda, and I do not even know what I did to deserve such a punishment," you explained.

“My friends once told me that one way to entertain yourself as time passed was the hear and tell stories, but the years have become so twisted, and now I only have stories but no one to share them with,” you explained then looked at him. 

“You know, maybe hearing each other’s stories could ease the painful aching within our souls, and I would love to talk again in the language of my old friends,” you smiled. 

He released a dry laugh. 

“I do not think you will enjoy hearing my story,” he answered. 

You grinned. “How about we care less about who we used to be in the past and take the chance to enjoy a moment of companionship?” you questioned. 

“So, what say you, Mellon? Care for a little chat?” you asked and waited for his answer.

Momentary calculating his options didn't take too long. You were the first person to remind him of his past while also dwelling from his time. Two souls, two hearts connecting at once. There wasn't another who could understand him like you would, and that was all he sought after. Inhaling, he looked to the overcast skies and back at you. “Sure, why not.”

[katierosefun]

you know when you watch a show or read a book or whatever and you envy the characters so much so much because you wish you had that family or that group of friends because there really isn’t a lonelier feeling than seeing that, huh