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#i wonder if they'll interact.........................
spectralscathath · 3 days
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Tour Guide to the Unexplained- A Gravity Falls Fanfiction
Chapter 2- Blue Light Fright Night
Stan and Ford didn’t expect much when getting shipped up to Gravity Falls to stay with estranged family. Not a party-hating ghost, not new friends and new enemies, and definitely not the Mystery Shack and their lying uncle who runs it. But with Ford’s smarts and Stan’s punching, there’s no mystery they can’t solve.
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"I can't believe it," Ford scowled as he restocked the snowglobe shelf. Little mini Mystery Shacks mocked him as they sat beside glass-encased Waddleses. How did Grunkle Dipper even get question mark-shaped glitter for these? "Gnomes on our first day- then we don't see jack!"
"Maybe we fought the gnomes so well they told the rest of the forest to be scared of us?" Stan polished the body parts jars on the other side of the aisle. 
"I think you're giving yourself too much credit."
"Hey-" Stan kicked him in the shin. Ford kicked back without thinking, focused on trying to get all the snowglobes lined up perfectly. "Maybe we're just looking in the wrong places? It's only been three days since gnome-pocalypse."
"We're not calling it 'gnome-pocalypse'. It was only a hundred or so gnomes. An apocalypse would require at least a thousand." He was rounding down as well. 
"Fine. What are we gonna call it then?"
"Uh-" 
"So are you guys coming to the party tonight?" Carla interrupted as she came around the corner, her nametag pinned to the front of her pink shirt and a flower in her hair. 
"Party?" Ford looked at her, setting down the final snowglobe. 
"Yeah!" Carla beamed and did a little dance in place, hopping from one foot to the other. "It's at the high school gym- the local sheriff sets up one every month for all the teens and it's super fun. You should totally come and meet all my friends- it'll be awesome!"
Ford's breath caught in his throat, an indescribable mixture of wonder and excitement filling him from the tips of his toes to the top of his head. A real invitation to a real party. They'd never had one before! And here Carla was, offering an invitation like they were normal . Like it didn't matter that Ford had six fingers and Stan had the school record for detentions. 
"Yeah, we'll definitely be there!" He blurted out immediately, unwilling to let the opportunity of a lifetime slip by. "Wow, this is so exciting- Stanley, our first party!"
"Have you… never been to a party before?" Carla's face fell. 
" Pfft - of course we have," Stanley jumped in, waving a hand. "He just means in Gravity Falls, yunno. Jersey parties are really different so-"
"Oh, totally. But get ready, a Gravity Falls party is gonna knock your socks off!" Carla was all smiles again. Ford could see the reason why Grunkle Dipper had her as a cashier, she had a very upbeat demeanour that seemed popular with the tourists. The way she talked to them, able to get them smiling and laughing and telling her stories about their travels, she made it look so easy. Like talking to people was easy. Ford wondered how she did it. 
Maybe if he asked, she'd let him observe and record her interactions for science?
"Earth to Sixer-" Stanley poked him in the face and Ford spluttered, swatting at his hand. "You okay in there?"
'I'm fine!" Ford looked around and adjusted his glasses. "Where'd Carla go?"
"A tour finished so she's gone to do her charm offensive on getting them to buy junk," Stan shrugged. "Are you sure you want to go to a party?"
"Yeah!" Was that even a question? "Don't you? Why did you lie to Carla? We've never been invited anywhere before."
"Listen, Fordsy," Stanley put an arm around his shoulders. "When people invite you to do stuff you haven't done, you gotta pretend you have, or else they'll think 'wow, what kinda losers are those guys, never going to parties'. You wanna be in the in-crowd, go along with the popular decision if you don't wanna stand out."
"How do you know that?" Ford scrunched his nose. It seemed unnecessarily complicated, wouldn't honesty be the best policy in any conversation?
"Just makes sense," Stan shrugged. "Now Carla won't be thinking, 'those guys must be lame', she'll be thinking we're cool dudes back home."
"But we're not?"
"Yeah, but you shouldn't say that." Stan patted his back. "Do you really wanna go?"
"Of course! This is a chance to meet the wider population of Gravity Falls, and I bet with all the anomalies in this area, I won't even be the weirdest thing anyone's seen today!" He'd always wanted to go to a party. Like a regular kid. Maybe Gravity Falls wasn't so bad. 
"You're not weird," Stan scowled. "If any of them give you trouble I'll hit them."
"Stanley, mom said one week. You still have three more days." Ford reminded him. 
"Blegh-" Stanley stuck out his tongue. "Now we just gotta convince Grunkle Dipper to let us go."
"Why would we need to convince him? Surely he'll understand how important this is to our preteen social development."
#
"Not a chance." Dipper didn't even look up from the pasta sauce he was stirring. 
"What?!" They yelled in unison, Ford looking like all his dreams crashed and burned and Stan slamming his hands on the kitchen table. He hid a wince. Toughen up, Stan. Be a man. 
"It's a cop party, no nephews of mine are going to a cop party." 
"Grunkle Dipper, do you have something against cops?" Stan had to ask.
"I didn't agree to more questions."
So the answer was a yes. Cool. 
"But Grunkle Dipper-" Ford whined. "We've never been to a party before and we told Carla we'd be there. Please?"
"Okay, here's the thing." Dipper turned around and pointed his pasta spoon at them, pajama pants and a threadbare sweater on. It was silly. It had a puppy on it. "Grenda throws these parties once a month for all the teens in town, and because everyone's kids are there, all the townsfolk treat it as a social event. It's loud, annoying, and seriously not worth your time."
"But we could be party rocking in the house tonight." Ford said it with all the sincerity in his soul and Stan wanted to know how his nerd of a brother had found out about songs that weren't from the 1700s or whenever.
"What?" Dipper's face scrunched before he shook it off and went back to mixing pasta sauce and spaghetti. "Let me explain: I don't 'like' or 'trust' most of the people in this town, and the feeling's pretty mutual. Why don't you just have a party here? This is a house, it can- it can 'party rock'."
"Can we invite people?" Ford perked up.
"No."
"Grunkle Dipper!"
Stan hid a snort-laugh as he watched, studying Dipper more so than Ford, head tilted to make sure he didn't miss anything. There had to be a magic word of some sort to get him to agree. He didn't trust the townspeople, hey?
"If you don't like anyone here-" he cut off Ford's rant about the 'psychosocial development of twelve-year-old brains' before it really got going- "then the smartest option is to bring us into town when everyone's gonna be there." Stan shrugged like it was the most obvious thing in the world, playing up the casualness. 
Dipper looked at him with suspicion. "What's your game, kid?"
"That way you can point out who to avoid and who we should keep an eye on so we can recognise them. I mean, we're gonna need to go into town eventually, might as well get it over with."
"... Alright, that's not a bad point." Dipper nodded, brow furrowed. Stan gave him an absolutely angelic smile, well practiced for when mom busted out the camera for family photos, and Dipper's brows furrowed harder.
"So can we go? Carla invited us as well, it would look bad if we went back on our word. And you said you wanted us to have a good summer."
"Okay, okay, okay." Dipper groaned and pinched the bridge of his nose, serving up three plates of spaghetti as he joined them at the table. "You can go, but if Sheriff Grenda asks about me, tell her I'm dead or whatever."
"Yes!" Stan punched the air. "Yes!"
"What?! How is that the conclusion of this?" Ford looked stunned, mouth hanging open.
"Your brother drives a hard bargain, kid," Dipper pointed with a plastic spork. All his cutlery was plastic and Stan thought it was weird, no metal, no forks. But  it was the durable, colourful kind used for camping. "Eat your pasta and we'll get this over with."
Stan shoveled the pasta into his mouth, enjoying the taste of victory. Whaddaya know, for once Stan got them the win. That was never gonna happen again.
#
Ford's excitement only grew as they drove into town, staring out the window and trying to see anomalies in the dark. Stan kicked the back of the empty passenger seat and tossed his head back with a groan. "Why are we listening to BABBA?" 
"Because I love this song." Grunkle Dipper turned it up a notch and sang along, badly. Ford winced at the falsetto of "Dis-co Girl! Coming through! That girl is you!"
"Get me outta here!" Stan's next kick used both feet. "If you're listening, save me, Paul Bunyan!"
"Calm down, Stanley, we're almost there!" Ford could see all the cars parked outside the high school, and a giant RV with GIDEON across the side that towered over everything else. "What's that?"
"First people in this town you need to avoid: Gideon Gleeful and his lil b-" Dipper growled, cutting himself off before continuing- "Bud Gleeful. Gideon's the worst, they're just a creepy pair. Just got back from touring America with their fake psychic act."
"Okay." A fake psychic. Just like their mom. Ford missed her, she promised she'd call every week but it didn't feel like enough. "Anyone else?"
"Preston Northwest is about your age and a piece of work?" 
"I thought you'd have more enemies." Stan grinned mischievously.
"Those are just the child ones." Dipper hooked an elbow over his seat and looked back as he reversed into a parking space, wearing one of the baseball caps from the gift shop with a pine tree logo. His denim jacket and pajama pants clashed terribly with his 'dog playing basketball' sweater. Ford hadn't seen him wear the same sweater twice, but they all looked decades old, handknitted, and far too irrational for him. Perhaps he had some ancient sweater collection?
"How many adult enemies are there?" Stan unclipped his seatbelt as the truck stopped. 
"Don't you have a party to go to?" Dipper waved a hand at them. "Have fun and don't die or something. I'll be here when you want to leave."
"Thanks, Grunkle Dipper!" They chorused and hopped out, Stan racing around to Ford's side of the truck. 
"You ready?" He took Ford's hand for a second, and Ford snatched it back, trying not to think about his hands. It was gonna be fine, this wasn't Jersey. People here would like him. 
"Race you in?" He offered instead, shoving his hands into his pockets just in case. 
"You're on." Stan grinned and took off. He might have been better at punching, but they were both pretty fast from a childhood of dodging bullies. Usually it was a tie. 
This time Ford got there first by mere seconds and paused, able to feel the thud of the music inside in his ribcage. Of course- soundwaves were physical, that only made sense. He was about to lift his hand from his pocket before hesitating. His first party. Did he want to start off with a bad impression?
Stan caught up and pushed open the door. "After you, Sixer."
Ford smiled gratefully at him, stepping in as the smell of dry ice and cheese flavouring hit him. The gym was big, all the bleachers tucked away, and while there was no disco ball, someone had set up projector lights that sent rainbow shapes and lazers everywhere. The room was surprisingly full, and Ford had a sinking feeling they arrived late. "Were we meant to be here earlier?"
"Don't worry- it's cool to arrive late, I heard." Stanley stuck by his side as they stood in the doorway. "Should we find Carla? She's the only person we know here, I think."
Ford had a thought. A bit of a mean thought. Did he want his first impression on people to be Stanley as well? Not that Stanley was bad, Ford loved his brother more than anything, but his nicknames might give people the wrong idea, and the other way around- Maybe Stan would want to meet people without having to talk for Ford as well?
"We can split up, do a sweep on each side, and meet on the other end of the gym." He felt guilty saying it, but he couldn't help being interested in what would happen if he made introductions on his own for once. It was an experiment. 
"See who spots her first so we can talk to her, good idea." Stanley nodded. "Race you there."
He took off through the crowd to the right, leaving Ford to his own business and taking the other. He didn't move as fast as Stanley, keeping his hands in his pockets as he avoided the major crowd and skirted the edges. His head swivelled like an owl's as he looked around, trying to see anyone who might be safe to talk to. 
He saw something sparking near the wall and immediately remembered the various dangers of electrical hazards, resolving to check it and report it to the nearest grown-up- oh, but if that was Sheriff Grenda, Grunkle Dipper said not to talk to her-
Ford didn't really want to do what Dipper said, but… what if he got angry at them for disobeying?
More sparks. He blinked, regaining his focus, and sped up, noticing they were tucked beside the folded bleachers, hard for people in the crowd to see, hidden by the fog of dry ice. 
There was someone there. Two someones. Ford drew closer, in time to see a blowtorch light up and be lowered to a piece of metal. 
"What are you doing?" He blurted out, the two teenagers looking at him. It was hard to make out clear details in the dark hall, but the one leaning against the wall held a plastic bag of sliced bread, and the boy on the floor had a welding visor over his face. 
"Hi there!" The boy stood and flipped his welding mask up, revealing round glasses, a thin face, a long nose, and a friendly smile. "I'm Fiddleford McGucket, local inventor."
"You're an inventor?" Ford smiled. "Me too! I mean- I'm branching out into the field, I'm currently working on a magnet gun."
"Well that sounds mathematically feasible, I reckon." Fiddleford offered a hand to shake, absolutely covered in bandages.
Ford stared at it. "Uh- won't that hurt if I touch it?"
"I've got an un-nat-ur-al-ly high tolerance to pain, doctors say," he laughed, singsonging each syllable in a playful Tennessee twang. "Don't mind the bandages, all from my thingamajig building."
Ford hesitated just a moment longer before he pulled his hand from his pocket and shook Fiddleford's hand.
"Why, that is a mighty fine case of polydactyly you got there." Fiddleford complimented. 
"Th- thanks." He stuttered, in utter shock. No one had ever actually complimented him on it before. Most people didn't even know the term. "You too- I mean- not polydactyly, just thanks?" 
"Thank you kindly, and this here's my friend, Tad."
"Hi, I'm Tad Strange." The deepness of the other boy's voice had Ford reeling. Was that natural? He looked barely older than Ford, with shiny black hair and very neat clothes. He had to be the most nondescript person Ford had ever seen. "Would you like some bread?"
"Uh- okay?" Ford took some of the offered bread. Plain white sliced, from a grocery store. Was he meant to eat this without anything on it? Well- okay, he could try. "Do you carry this everywhere?"
"Of course. It's my emergency bread."
"Oh. Cool?" It didn't seem normal, but maybe it was for Gravity Falls? His hypothesis was correct, he was an anomaly in a town of anomalies! He could fit in here! "I like your voice."
"Thank you." Tad smiled. Ford liked his diction, how deliberately he spoke, how even his voice was. It seemed so calm. "It broke when Tad Strange was seven."
"If we're talking about weird body things, I'm double-jointed?" Fiddleford offered and pulled out a pair of black goggles, a matching pair to the ones Tad had pushed up into his dark hair, hard to see. "Here, put these on, I'm working on improving Tad's phone. I reckon I can really spruce it up."
"Tad Strange would like jetpack capabilities." 
"Yeah! I'd love to help!" Ford's smile was so wide it hurt at the edges, so excited he feared he may explode. Not that it was scientifically possible. 
Was this how easy making friends could be? 
#
Stan plunged into the crowd like a superhero charged through henchmen, keeping his head cocked in case he heard Ford get in trouble. He had to be always ready for bullies, Ford could have all the hope he wanted, as long as Stanley protected him. 
He squinted through the dark, not able to see too much in the weird party lights, lots of pinks and blues and kinda dark. He didn't really like his glasses much when he had to wear them, they were nerdy and made bullies throw stuff at him. He could see most things anyway, just blurry, and as long as he could get the gist he could work with the rest. 'Sides, no point in him having glasses anymore, amount of fights he got in.
A hand grabbed his shoulder and he swung without thinking, catching air. Carla's laugh was bright and cheery. "Easy, tiger! Didn't mean to surprise you."
"Sorry." Stan mumbled. He wasn't as noble as some of the boys back home, who didn't hit girls. Seemed insulting to Stan, if they wanted to fight they should get to fight. But Carla wasn't like the girls back home, he didn't want to hit her. 
"C'mon, my friends are this way." Carla took his hand and pulled him through the crowd. Her hand was warm around his, and she didn't even hesitate. Known him four days and still took his hand. Wow, she was nice.
She pulled him to the snacks table, piled high with chips and chocolates and one very big lady in a cop uniform serving punch. Carla let go of his hand and spun around to face him, her skirt twirling as the lazers made the sequin design on it sparkle, and Stan suddenly got why Shermie used to get so weird around girls. Holy Moses.
"Stanley Pines, meet my besties!" Carla gestured at the group. One girl was spinning in place with an eye closed, two boys were having a string cheese war that looked more like flirting than fighting, the other girl was filming, and the last boy was cheering everyone on. "That's Shandra, Susan, Daryl and Edwin, and Tyler! Everyone, this is Stan!"
"Hi." Stan nodded at them, getting a nod back from the girls and Tyler. 
"And- wait, where's your brother?" Carla looked worriedly at him. "Didn't he come?"
"Course he did! Just went to scope out some of the party," Stan played it off, even as he looked around. What if Ford was already getting picked on? "He'll catch up."
"Okay, cool!" Carla looked up over the crowd and brightened. Didn't seem possible but she managed it. "There's Bud! Hold on, I'll get him." She dove into the crowd again, leaving Stan with her friends and no idea what to do.
He grabbed a random bar of candy to eat to avoid having to make conversation, shoving it all in his mouth in one go. He accidentally made eye contact with the cop and looked away too fast. That was probably suspicious. What was it Grunkle Dipper said? Don't speak English to cops?
Carla came back to the group with a wave, her hand entwined with another boy's. "Okay everyone! I need to introduce you all to my new boyfriend, Bud Gleeful!"
Stan was real dumb. Shoulda seen that coming, obviously Carla had a boyfriend. Little weird that it was one of Grunkle Dipper's enemies, but it was Stan's own fault that he got all weird just because the prettiest, nicest girl he ever met thought he was worth being kind to. No point being disappointed because he got stupid. 
"What a delight to meet you all," Bud smiled cheerfully, his brown roots visibly showing through white hair dye. Stan turned his back and started eating more candy.
The other teens offered a chorus of uninterested 'hi's, still focused on their cheese fight. Looked like Blubs was winning, if the goal was to spray as much cheese as possible in his mouth? 
Stan was starting to get why Grunkle Dipper didn't bother with the town, he was not impressed so far. Except by Carla, but she worked in the Mystery Shack so she didn't count. 
"And who might you be, lil fella?" Bud drawled from behind Stan, which had his hackles up and his fists clenched, ready for a fight. Bud was twice his size, but so was Crampelter, and Stan had won that last fight. He wasn't weak and useless anymore, he wasn't the wimp that cried after just one hit, not now that he could fight.
He turned around, feet shifting into the stance from his boxing lessons as he looked up at the bigger teenager. "I'm Stan. Who wants to know?"
"Why, just 'lil ol me'-" he spoke it like a quote- "it's merely just- well, small towns, I tend to know near-everyone. But I don't recall seeing you here before."
"He and his twin are Dipper's nephews and they're in town for the summer," Carla smiled, clinging to Bud's arm. "They're here all the way from New Jersey, how cool is that?"
The other teens looked a bit more interested hearing that, looking at him like he was an oddity, something to gawk at. Was this how Ford felt? All the time? 
"Yeah, what about it?" 
"That's quite a distance," Bud whistled. "Would I be right in assuming you're staying in that old shack in the woods?"
"Where else would I stay, smart guy?" Stan mouthed off, focus narrowing to who else might be coming in for a sneak attack. Crampelter had friends, maybe Bud did too. "My Grunkle lives there."
"Yes, a so-called man of mystery," Bud clicked his tongue. "He's quite a shameless fraud, wouldn't you agree?"
"Coming from someone who's dad is a fake psychic?" Stan aimed for what would hurt, because it hurt when he thought about it. "What a liar, bet you can't trust anything he says."
Everyone gasped. But they didn't know. He loved his mom so much, so much , but she lied so much, just because, even when there was no reason. She didn't mean any harm, but… 
"Hey now, that's not true!" Bud snapped, getting angry, and Stan regretted saying anything when he saw the look on Carla's face. She looked at him like he said something bad. He did say something bad. He was a bad kid, everyone knew it. 
What was he doing? He was ruining the party, he was making everyone upset, and Ford wasn't here, Stan needed him and he wasn't here, and why did he instantly make it a fight? Because Dipper said not to trust someone?  What was wrong with him?!
He had to get out of here. He pulled a smoke bomb from his pocket and hoped and prayed he got it right- got something right- and threw it at the ground. 
It shattered with a flash and a POP! and sent up a cloud of smoke and sparkles that had everyone coughing, and Stan bolted. 
He ran, sticking to the walls and the shadows, passing a supply closet as he looked for Ford. Where was his brother? 
He was rounding the bleachers when he heard Ford laughing. At what? He slowed his steps, peeking around the corner to see Ford holding a blowtorch and soldering something, laughing and talking with two other boys. He looked like he was having a great time. Without Stanley.
Stan felt the bottom drop out of his stomach, fists clenched tight and shaking with that energy he got in fights. Ford had some sciency name for it that Stan couldn't remember right now. 
Ford was fine. He found people who liked him. Just like he wanted. Stan was tempted to go over there and say hi- but if Ford wanted that wouldn't he have come and got Stanley? Ford always wanted to show off cool things he found, he dragged Stanley all over Glass Shard Beach, so this must mean Ford didn't want to show off his new friends. 
Stanley could take a hint. Heck- Ford would probably be better off with friends who were smart like him. Stan just caused trouble, everyone knew it. 
He backed away, genuinely considering sneaking out to go sit with Grunkle Dipper. Even if that meant listening to girly pop music. 
Actually-
Nah. Still not desperate enough for that. He still wasn't sure if Grunkle Dipper even wanted them around, Shermie had been the one to push for the trip. Even brought the bus tickets. 
Everyone else kept making decisions and Stan kept having to deal with them. He scowled and found the supply closet again, because at least Carla and Bud wouldn't find him in here if they wanted to get mad at him for causing problems. 
He closed the door behind him and shoved over the nearest thing, sending janitor supplies clattering to the ground as he yelled, just to get the energy out. "I never even wanted to come here! Ford did, not me!" 
He turned and punched the drywall. "I hate stupid parties!"
The drywall cracked. Cracked more. Fell away to reveal a big boxy safe hidden behind the plaster, rusted and covered in dust and cobwebs. Stan had a suddenly cold feeling, a looming sense that he'd done something very stupid. 
A girl's voice whispered in his ear.
"Me too."
#
The screaming started as Dipper chewed a pen, brainstorming new attractions for the track. He caught the smell of ectoplasm in the air, able to recognise it instantly, and shoved open the door to his truck, sprinting towards the gym as a pale glow began to surround the building. 
He could hear the panic of the townsfolk,  his focus set on the door as he raced the ghostly energy, trying to get in before it cut off the gym from the outside world. The boys were still in there.
"No, no, no, no-!" The ectoplasm covered the door right as he reached it, the handle chilling his fingers as he failed to yank it open. He kept trying to jiggle it open before he switched to banging his fists against the glass. "Kids!"
"My lil Buddy-boy!" He heard from behind him, Gideon Gleeful running in his bedazzled suit, his white pompadour bouncing with each step of his wingtip shoes.  Dipper ignored him and braced his shoulder against the door, trying to shove it open. Now wasn't the time to start fighting his nemesis. Maybe? He could multitask.
"Hold on, son!" Gideon panicked before turning to the crowd, hand on his bolo tie. "Everyone, please! I need you all to step back and let me use my psychic abilities! Step back, everyone!"
Dipper felt himself step back before he could snap at Gideon to back off, watching Gideon raise his hand to the building.
"Spirit! I compel thee! Release our children and be banished from this place!" Gideon's voice boomed out bombastically, bringing his TV psychic bravado to the real world.
Nothing happened.
Obviously.
"Oh no! Something's blocking my powers! My innate abilities! That I definitely have!"
"Yeah, yeah," Dipper snarled and pulled a glove from his pocket, yanking it on as he stomped to the door. "Hey, ghost! Open up!" 
He drew back his fist and punched the door, the ectoplasmic coating jiggling like jello before it started to wobble faster, energy building up. Bad sign.
Dipper had enough time to swear for real before the ghost blasted him away from the building and into darkness.
#
One minute Ford was helping solder an ignition wire, the next the walls were glowing and tables and chairs were floating in the air. Snacks were flying, aimed at people's heads as screams filled the air, and Tad had to struggle to hold onto his bread as it threatened to fly away too. 
"What's happening?" Fiddleford clutched his hands together, rubbing at his spindly fingers. The rest of the party were freaking out, some rushing the doors, others trying to hide, some freezing in fear. 
Ford? Ford felt alive . This was it, the weirdness he knew was here. 
"Hold on, I may have an answer-" but the diary was so uncool-looking, what if his new friends didn't want to be his friends because of it? 
"Ford!" That was Stanley! "Ford, Ford, Ford!"
"Over here!" He responded without hesitation, because that was his brother calling and Ford would always answer. 
Stan rounded the bleachers and skidded to a stop, worn sneakers nearly losing traction on the smooth gym floors. His eyes were wide and he almost looked scared. Couldn't be true though, Ford had documented Stan's phobias and fear responses. Paranormal activity wasn't meant to register. "It's bad! It's really bad!"
"Wait-" Ford adjusted his glasses. "Stanley, did you do this?"
"I didn't plan on it, Sixer!" Stan flipped a switch into anger, shoulders hunched defensively. "I think it's a girl! I heard a voice!"
"A voice? So not only is this clearly paranormal activity of some form, but it's aware enough to manifest vocals and self-identify? Fascinating!"
"Uh, Ford? Who's this?" Fiddleford tapped him on the shoulder.
"Oh!" He'd completely forgotten they were there, so caught up in the supernatural. "Fiddleford, Tad, this is my twin brother, Stanley. Stanley, these are my friends, Fiddleford and Tad."
"Hi. I'm Tad Strange. I like bread."
"Yeah, great to meetcha, the nerd book , Ford, what does it say ?" Stan made a swipe for Ford's jacket, where he knew the book was. 
Ford backed up. "I don't- I haven't looked yet!"
"Why not?!"
"Because-" laughter, vicious and dark, rang out around the room, and Stan whirled, hand out like he was protecting Ford and his friends. Ford stared as Carla lifted into the centre of the room, her eyes glowing white from within and her arms outstretched.
She spoke with a voice that wasn't hers. "Sixty years I've watched you all party! Now tonight will be your last!"
"Hey!" Sheriff Grenda stomped forward and pointed at her. "You're under arrest for possession! Get outta that teenager!"
"Adults," the ghost scoffed, crossing Carla's arms. "You threw this party? Then I'll throw you!"
Carla pointed as Grenda was enveloped in pale light before she seemed to- rip apart? But it looked wet? But there was also no blood or anything, her matter was just rearranged? That was so cool! Oh- and bad too, right.
"Sheriff!" 
"Where did she go?"
"It turned her into a disco ball!"
It had. Ford had never seen a disco ball with a face before. He wanted to take so many notes.
"Back behind the bleachers, c'mon!" Fiddleford dragged both the twins to the corner he and Tad were hiding in, sitting them down as they hid in the shadows. It wasn't much of a hiding spot, but the panicking crowd likely drew more attention. 
"Poindexter!" Stanley grabbed his shoulders and shook him. "You gotta focus! How do we stop this?"
"Okay." He pulled out the diary and started flipping through, face burning. He hoped Fiddleford and Tad didn't laugh at the sparkliness of it. "Ghosts, ghosts, I know I saw something- here!"
He cleared his throat and began reading the sticker-covered page, googly eyes pasted onto a drawing of a happy ghost.
"Dear diary,
I fought a ghost today! It was crazy! He was really cute, definitely dreamy, but he was also a major meanie who wanted to destroy town, so dateability: questionable. 
Good thing I saw some of her ghost hunting tapes, otherwise I wouldn't have kicked ghostly butt! I bet this one would have counted as a Category 5, so kind of a ghost wimp. Lemme list the categories before I forget! Womp womp!"
Ford scanned through the categories before he found it. "This must be it! 'Category 8: Haunted Buildings- these ghosts are stuck in one place and make reality go all whoa! But they can't actually hurt people permanently and you can totally work things out with them by talking about their feelings, awwwwww' and then there's a heart drawn in? And people hugging?"
"We're all gonna die," Stan decided. 
"Stan, you have to tell me how this happened. Maybe there's a clue there."
"I just hit a wall." Stan shrugged, looking away. "Same as always."
"Perhaps we should ask the ghost what it wants?" Tad offered as a solution, looking abnormally calm while Fiddleford was having a silent freak out next to him, rocking back and forth and carding his hands through his hair. Ford felt a bit bad to see him so nervous, he must not have encountered an anomaly before. 
"I think it's pretty easy to tell what the ghost wants, Strange." Stan snarked.
"I WILL DESTROY ALL THE PARTY SPIRIT THAT HAS EVER EXISTED!"
"Yeah, that bit's obvious," Ford agreed. "It says that Category 8s aren't unreasonable, so maybe we can convince it to leave everyone alone?"
"We have to get it out of Carla," Stan agreed and took Ford's hand. Ford blinked at him in surprise. Stan must have really been scared, they hadn't held hands in a while. His fingers were trembling. 
Ford didn't let go this time. Not if Stanley needed it. He squeezed his twin's hand and pulled them both out of hiding, the room nearly empty from everyone being turned into party favours and posters and stuff. Carla's body floated, items swirling around her like a tornado, her flower missing from her hair. 
"Hey, ghost!" Ford yelled as he and Stan stepped up. "We wanna talk!"
"Oh?" Carla's body raised a hand and they were both floating. Ford felt Stanley's hand go tight in a death grip, hard enough to hurt. His fear of heights, Ford had to do something. The ghost continued, making Carla's face angry in a way that didn't look right. "What do you possibly have to say? Here to defend parties like everyone else?"
"I- we wanted to ask why you're unhappy!" Ford blurted out. "We want to try fix it!"
"How can you fix it? You were invited to this party like everyone else, I bet you've been to lots of them, everyone has! Everyone but me!"
"No we haven't!" Ford tried to convince her. "Tell her, Stanley!"
"I-" Stan's eyes were scrunched shut, face pale and sweaty. "We haven't! Look at us, we're losers! Who'd invite us anywhere?!"
Everything in the gym stopped spinning. Then it all crashed to the ground, Stan and Ford included. Stan immediately dropped to his knees and pressed his face to the floor, while Ford landed a little steadier. He placed a hand on Stanley's back and looked up at Carla, or, more accurately, at the ghost that had appeared, holding Carla up by the shoulders.
She looked like a normal teenager in retro clothes, just with thick glasses like Ford. 
"You're losers like me? But you don't look like it!"
Ford held up his hand and wiggled his six fingers. "I'm definitely a loser. And my brother…"  they both looked at Stanley, currently muttering 'sweet Moses, I love you ground'. 
"But if you're losers, then why are you at a party?" She scowled and adjusted her glasses. "Especially when one of you hates them."
"Huh?" Ford looked at Stanley, feeling betrayed. Stanley didn't like parties? But he was the one who convinced Grunkle Dipper, and said they'd been to lots to Carla, and-
And, Ford suddenly remembered, dodged the question about wanting to go in the first place.
"Stanley?"
Stanley looked away and swiped his nose with his wrist brace. "Whatever. So what if I do?" He pointed at the ghost. "Why do you hate them?"
The ghost gave a very big sigh and Ford braced for backstory. "No one in this town ever invited me to anything."
"Even all of the parties that were meant for everyone, I would get an anti-invitation. An unvitation ." The ghost floated just above the ground, looking sad.  "So one day, I decided that I would ignore my unvitation and go to a party meant for everyone."
She tilted her head. "Unfortunately, that party was to celebrate Gravity Falls' Annual Heavy Object Tossing Competition, and a safe landed right on me."
"That can not be a real thing-"
"It's real!" Sheriff Grenda, in disco ball form, yelled out. "I've won it eight years in a row!"
"Okay…?" Ford shook his head, resolving to ignore that. "So you've been here ever since?"
"Yes. I've watched people party for sixty years here!" The ghost began to turn red and catch fire. "And still! No invitations!"
"What if we invited you?" Ford offered.
"Or Carla!" Stan blurted out. "Carla over there, you just possessed her. She's super nice and will invite anyone. She invited us, for cryin' out loud."
"Oh. Okay." The ghost floated over to Carla, sitting on the floor staring blankly into the middle distance, hugging her knees to her chest. "Hi Carla! Can I come to this party?"
"Uh…" Carla looked over at them, frazzled and ruffled. Ford nodded as hard as he could while Stan gave her very emphatic thumbs up. Carla looked back to the ghost. "Sure...?"
"Great!" The ghost snapped her fingers and everything went right back to normal. People turned back into people, Grenda was no longer a disco ball, and the music started up again. "I've always wanted to go to a party! Whoo-hoo!"
"Can I ask you a million questions about being a ghost?!" Ford asked now that the danger was gone, pulling out a spare notepad and pencil, not noticing Stan walk off.
#
Stan picked up Carla's plastic flower and held it out to her. "Are you okay?"
"I'm not sure?" Carla accepted the flower, putting it in her hair. "I think my whole worldview just changed."
"Yep." Stan hesitated, fidgeting with his wrist brace. "I'm sorry I said mean things to Bud."
"Oh. Well- thanks, but I think you need to apologise to him, okay?" Carla smiled at him and stood up, brushing off her skirt.
Stan nodded and scuffed his shoe against the floor. "I will."
"Thanks. You're a good kid, Stan." She patted his shoulder. "And for the record: I don't think you're a loser, you or your brother. Jersey doesn't know what they got."
"Kay." Stan agreed because how was he meant to argue that? Not when Carla was smiling at him like she believed it, like she wasn't so cool. "Thanks, Carla."
"Carla!" Bud shoved through the crowd, flowery shirt looking a bit rumpled. "Are you alright, dearest-darlingest?"
"I'm fine, really!" Carla beamed, taking Bud's hands. "Stan and Ford saved me."
"I can see that." Bud shot Stan a filthy look. 
"Hey, Bud." Stan shoved his hands into his pockets, having to drag the words out of himself. He didn't like apologising much. Usually it didn't help things. 
"Can I help you, Stanley?" He made it sound utterly frigid. 
"Sorry for what I said about your dad and stuff. It was mean." Stan looked away, looking at Ford, who was introducing the ghost to Strange and McGucket. At least he was having fun. 
"I… suppose I'm also sorry about what I said about your great uncle. It was uncalled for." Bud tugged at the collar of his shirt. "Perhaps we should call a truce?"
"Sure. Truce." Stan stuck out his hand, too late realising it was his braced hand. 
Bud took it, squeezing way too hard and making the bones hurt. Stan didn't flinch and dug his nails in as an answer. 'Truce'. Sure. When Carla was around, at least.
"Yay!" Carla did a happy dance. "The power of friendship wins again!"
They both put on a smile for her, immediately shooting daggers at the other the moment she wasn't looking. Looked like they'd be hating each other in secret. Stan could live with that.
"I'm gonna go check on my brother." Stan yanked his hand back and walked off, already sick of Bud Gleeful. He was joining his Grunkle's rivalry on the side of his Grunkle. 
#
They found their Grunkle Dipper snoring in the back of his pick-up truck, having one of those old people naps he usually had in his armchair. Ford poked his face with a pencil, not expecting him to bolt upright and immediately fall out of the truck with a surprisingly girly scream.
"Augh! Dipper down! Dipper down!"
"Grunkle Dipper, we met a ghost!" Surely he saw the building glow, right? He'd believe Ford now!
"Huh?" Dipper rubbed his head, accidentally showing off the birthmark on his forehead of the Big Dipper constellation. He picked up his cap and set it down, blinking blearily up at Stan and Ford. "You what a what?"
"Met a ghost. Fought her, invited her to a party, whole shebang," Stan yawned. "Can we go home now?"
"I made friends!" Ford already had so many plans. "Can they come over for a sleepover tomorrow? They already called their parents and asked!"
"Sure and sure?" Dipper dusted off his pajamas, surprisingly dirty for a nap in his truck, and Ford noticed something.
"What's that glove?"
"Glove?" Dipper looked down before he noticed the blue glove on his right hand. He made a weird face before he pulled it off. "Uh, it's a- a compression glove? Yep! That thing! For my old man arthritis. Flares up sometimes. 'Cause I'm old."
"Aren't you fifty-seven?"
"I'm whatever age a senior's discount at the movies is," Dipper snarked, and Ford scowled. That felt sorta illegal. Definitely unethical.
"I like your moxie, Grunkle Dip," Stan complimented as he clambered out of the back of the truck. "So did you see any of that?"
"Any of what? I've been sleeping." Dipper blinked innocently.
"Oh, come on!" Now Ford really had to find proof of the supernatural. Time to build a gnome trap.
He reached for Stanley's hand again, resolving to talk to him later about stuff. Stanley squeezed his hand back, smiling at him before he yawned again. 
Ford yawned in response. Okay. Tomorrow. They'd talk tomorrow. Stanley shouldn't have to feel like he needed to hide things, not from his brother. 
Mystery twins forever, after all.
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yoihino · 16 days
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Roleplay youtube channel for the stickman figures of animation vs animator was not something I had in my 2024 bingo but I am loving it
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oediex · 2 months
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Stepping into the zero waste shop is like going underwater, the sounds of traffic, children's play, and house renovations are muffled by the surrounding walls, even with the door wide open. There are very few people inside. It feels safe.
Today is Saturday, so the vegan pastries are out.
"Oh," I say. "I was hoping for the square one with the cream, and chocolate on top." I make the shape with my forefingers and thumbs. "They're my favourite."
"Ah, they were sold out immediately this morning," replies the shop assistant. "They're very popular. We've ordered some more next week."
"That's good," I say. "It's the best one."
"We can put one aside for you, if you like."
It feels like cheating to me. To hog a precious resource like that. A dishonesty I cannot get past.
"So they were gone by noon already? I don't get up early enough for that."
"One person came in and said, 'yes, I'll take all six!'"
"Well, that's a little mean, as well," I joke.
The shop assistant laughs. "Well, maybe he got them for his six grandchildren!"
"Fine," I concede. "If it means they got vegan pastries instead of non-vegan ones, I'll pay the price. It's just such a sweet taste of nostalgia, you know?"
And then, after picking a pastry with hazelnut filling that they recommend, I step back into the cacophony that is the outside.
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nonoqy · 6 months
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I've been doomscrolling through so many dteam blogs these past few days trying to see how everyone's reactions and can I just say how much i resonate with you and your anons 😭. Especially with "I'm angry at them, I'm mad at them, I'm disappointed that they still haven't learned and they're still stupid fucking men who can't get a fucking hint and ALSO I wish I we can sit down and talk to them more sincerely because we want them to be better and believe they can be and they ARE😭
anonieeee im glad this resonated with you i think a lot of people on twitter are only seeing the bad side of it all and a lot of people on tumblr are quick to dismiss the bad side when actually it's all very nuanced. i wasn't watching cate's stream from the beginning but i feel like a lot of the stuff she mentioned Needed to be heard and i really really hope they both watch the vod
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the-voldsoy · 2 days
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Ethics Town: Ship's Theseus thoughts<3:
the title is making me so excited I love the ship of Theseus
DAVID AULTTTT
holy fuck brain transplants ?? I love fictional unethical science experiments<33
diversity win! the man about to commit medical atrocities is gay! 🏳️‍🌈
HE KNOWS ??? whaugh ??? ? ???? ?????
oh God.
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enbyshads · 9 months
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still thinking about how nine said that sonic was only saving the other variants because he felt guilty about what he did, that he was responsible for all of that so that was his way of "redeeming himself" idk why but that really got to me
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grey-wardens · 1 month
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am i the only one not wanting to romance certain npcs in fields of mistria because i don't want to interrupt what they have going on with certain other npcs 💀
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wtl-archive · 2 months
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Any time I'm forced to explain anything about the actual script of this AU I feel like the creator of Cruelty Squad when Pyro was interviewing him
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mistrdctr · 9 months
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@paramounticebound asked: i did not say it was healthy.
Khan had offered to get them something to eat for the evening; Mostly because Stephen has been dealing with this stupid thing all fucking day long, a thing he's brought back from another dimension the night before - entirely on accident, that is, a tiny demon the size of a peanut that just clings to him and won't let go.
Spell after spell had been used, try after try to keep it contained and not set the Sanctum on fire. At the end, after a whopping eleven and a half hours, he had finally managed to get that thing caged up and then literally yeeted that fucking asshole of a creature back into his own world - yes, he'd kicked the container made of magic like a damn football, he deserved to experience that, truly so.
... Anyways, Khan had offered to get them something eatable. Strange was quite thankful about it, told Khan to use his wallet and go for it ("But please stay below 30 dollars, I'm actually not as rich as it seems."), and he's just done banishing their unwelcomed visitor from this reality when both of them, Khan and Stephen, enter the kitchen simultaneously.
The man sets everything he got down onto the kitchen island, almost pointedly so, and the sorcerer takes in the sights of four (!) pizza cartons, two large sodas as well as a bag filled with what might be breadsticks or other snacks that will go well with the chosen food. It takes him a moment to comprehend the sight; That's precisely when Khan speaks.
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"Oh, don't you worry your pretty face about that.", is the answer given by a very eager Stephen, hands immediately reaching out to pick up one of the boxes.
Fuck, smells like heaven.
"I am absolutely not complaining in any shape or form. Honestly, would have kicked your ass straight back to where you come from if you dared to bring home a fucking salad or some shit ---I deserve that pizza, you're so damn right about that."
Pizza and soda, what better could there be after a lon day of hard annoying work?
Sending Khan to get them dinner? A good idea.
"---Wanna watch a movie while we devour those twenty-thousand calories together?"
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every time i think the "staff can do no wrong and any form of complaining or expressing literally anything other than "yaaay love it <3" with no further comments is bashing and literally evil we should never say anything that could even potentially be interpreted as mildly critical ever because ~some artist who worked hard on this is probably reading the forums and might feel bad if we ever express anything but praise~ also we must be constantly positive at all times unless we're passive-aggressively shaming someone for having an extremely polite and apologetically worded criticism and if you ask the staff for literally anything you had better be prepared to preface it with 3 paragraphs of apologizing for breathing air" attitude is bad on tumblr, i take one look at the forums, and holy fucking hell is it SO much worse on site
#i go for years at a time without ever bothering to look at fr forums#and then every time i do i remember why i stopped#it feels like a goddamned cult on there and every time i dip my toes i come out feeling slimy and sick#as if i just spent an hour being aggressively gaslit by my extremely manipulative grandmother#what the fuck is wrong with everyone#i'm glad i decided to keep this creepy fucking fandom at arm's length and mostly just lurk years ago#that place is not a healthy environment for anyone to be in#flight rising#legitimately the single worst fandom i've ever had the misfortune of being adjacent to#and in such a creepy and insidious way too#they'll call you an entitled whiny baby to your face and then convince you it's your fault and you're a horrible person for feeling offende#it feels like being neck deep in the absolute worst kind of preformative sj spaces#you know the ones where everyone interacts primarily via callout posts and there's discourse over if crossdressing is cultural appropriatio#that kind of toxic sj space type energy#but somehow combined with like this weird feeling of being in a mormon church in a deep south town#where all the “nice grandmas” will try to put poison in your food if they find out you're gay or voted blue even one time#and it's somehow gotten SO much worse since the last time i looked on there#they've got people literally apologizing for existing what the fuck how is this normal to any of you people#this is so far beyond toxic positivity it's like. crossbred with passive-aggression and shaming and metastatized into something new entirel#it's terrifying. i hope flight rising never shuts down just so that whatever the fuck this is can stay semi-contained.#pro tip: the more a fandom is universally convinced it's Wonderful and Welcoming the faster you should run the other way#actually good fandoms don't have to constantly reassure themselves and everyone that they're great and perfect and toxicity-free#nor do they react with immediate borderline violence to the slightest suggestion there might be anything wrong with the fandom culture#anything wrong other than “people like you who think there's something wrong with our perfect community” anyway#on that note also any fandom that insistently calls itself a “community” just. yeah. no.#get out while you still can.#fandoms work on corporate logic if they're trying to convince you they're your family or friend that's not just a red flag#that's a whole damn red fabric store
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crumbleclub · 1 year
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I think William's death in the Family Business AU might take place in California actually
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Idk when Story of Seasons: A Wonderful Life (the remake of Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life) comes out, but if the horse doesn't absolutely hate your guts for no reason whatsoever, it won't be the same
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christine-ye · 1 year
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If I had a nickel for every time I watched an anime with a red-themed girl named Asuka, I would have two nickels which isn't a lot, but it's weird that it happened twice.
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lexicals · 10 months
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Brought to tears by a bit of rp tonight where two of my party (magus & cleric, both human or at least human-appearing) were trying to investigate an apothecary for some information and ended up posing as students of the nearby college, one very successfully and the other.... not so successfully, cue a third party member (the halfling rogue) entering the shop to try to help and ending up with this interaction:
Shopkeeper: Oh hi! Can I help you out, or - are you guys all friends? :)
Rogue: [5 solid seconds of silence]
Rogue: THEY’RE.... MY.............. CHILDREN.
SK: ............huh?
Rogue: IN....... ALCHEMY! MY CHILDREN. IN ALCHEMY. IS THE NAME OF OUR STUDY GROUP! CHILDREN IN ALCHEMY.
SK: Oh, okay. That's.... nice?
Rogue (pointing to the cleric, who had not been very convincing): SHE NEEDS JUST, SO MUCH HELP. SO MUCH HELP.
Cleric: They don't even let me in the classes most of the time :(
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euryalex · 11 months
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GIRL BESTIES!!!!
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soraaiame · 1 year
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I'm applying for different jobs right now, and initially applied for an administrative assistant job at a local towing company...but they just messaged me asking if I wanted to apply for an open tow truck driver position???
I was about to message asking if the position I applied for is still available, and that I don't think I'm qualified for the driver position since I have never operated a tow truck before (and have never been behind the wheel of a large truck EVER in my life) but then I stopped to consider it...
I do have general driving experience, and the job listing sounds like they'll train me for it, plus that position sounds like it pays better than what I applied for, I wouldn't have to use my personal vehicle for work anymore (because my current job is killing my Jeep 🥲), and THEY asked ME to inquire about that position so...?
I'm going to ask my mom and sister for their opinions, but I think I might go for it! In the list of potential jobs, tow truck driver was NOWHERE on my radar, but since it's kind of fallen into my lap like this I think I'll give it a shot! 😁
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