#i’m thinking bringing yelan will really help

[euthymiya]

guess who doesn’t have work tomorrow 😌

[heartdiluc]

ᯓ★ hoyoverse women who would adore their pillow princess girlfriend <3

cw: fem afab reader, wlw, explicit nsfw content, pillow princess reader x dom character, consensual actions, poorly written sorry guys

she absolutely loves you so much. insists that you don’t do anything “just lay back and let me take care of you, princess!! <3”

her head is between your thighs for what feels like centuries. alternating between eating you out and fingering you. she’s so messy too <3 full on making out with you pussy.

you try to push her head away because its just too much :(( you’re overstimulated and you already came several times. but she just pushes your hand away and continues, might stop to spank your clit to reprimand you and just mumbling a simple “not done yet” or “i know what i’m doing, pretty girl”

and even if you ask to do anything to help get her off, she’ll shut it down, insisting that she just wants to make you feel good first (if you ask really nicely, she’ll ride your face and get off like that, but seriously does not let you do any work)

mindlessly plays with your tits. she’ll pinch at your nipples or even bring her mouth to your chest and suck on one of your breasts. expect for her to leave hickeys and marks all over your neck and chest

absolutely loves to hear every little moan, whimper, and sound coming from you. especially loves using a strap on you. she just can’t get over how you whine at her cock hitting so deep in you. she thinks you’re so cute when you’re holding onto her shoulders while crying at about how good she’s ruining you

oh women who just want to make you feel good and take pride in the fact that she keeps you satisfied <3

beidou, ningguang, dehya, yelan, arlechinno, yae miko, clorinde, kafka, serval, black swan, + ur favs <3

[vampkaashis-wife]

General Alatus. The name echoes in your head, a gift you’re not sure Xiao meant to give you. Even now, outside Wanmin Restaurant in Liyue Harbor, all you can think of is the haunted look in his eyes. You had meant to stay there with him until he returned to a semblance of the Xiao you know, but a day - was it a day, or more? - underground, you and Paimon were hungry. 

Anyway, he would probably still be there when you got back, judging from the lack of response when you tried to talk to him after he told you… Several secrets of his heart. If not, well. You would see him again, you were sure. 

“Do you think he’s okay?” Paimon voices the thoughts you hadn’t. She doesn’t use his name, but there’s only person she could be talking about right now. After all, the rest of the party that fell into the Chasm bed with you had been spotted around the harbor already. Indeed, Kuki and Itto had boisterously run past you to find the famed Captain Beidou, who was rumored to be by the docks this fine night (Itto went boisterously. Kuki ran after him in resigned amusement). 

“I hope so.” 

Xiao is not unlike you. A new name, a new life. A reckless quest to find someone he’d loved and lost. The only difference is he remembers his several thousand years of existence and you remember nearly nothing. Is it a blessing to remember, or a burden? Do the memories of the other four general yakshas bring him any ease, or only suffering?

You sigh, glancing at the untouched plate of almond tofu you had ordered without much thought. Perhaps Xiao had been so on your mind that you had ordered as if he was here with you. Humorous, really. Even if he was here, it was unlikely that he would partake in a meal with you. He seldom does, after all. Even so, eating is a vital part of any post-quest ritual. Xiao. You think it in your head, loudly, longingly, hoping that wherever he is in the world, he hears your concern echoed and amplified through the mountains of Liyue.

If you hope for him to appear, he does not.

-

It is later in your rooms that you call his name again. Out loud this time, and only because you still have that portion of almond tofu for him. Sitting on your bed, staring at the door, you murmur, “Xiao,” and await the knock that’s sure to come.

It comes in seconds, in fact, followed by the familiar: “You called?”

“It’s open.” 

He opens the door. He’s always looked smaller than most men when you take the time to look at him, but exhaustion and grief make him even smaller in your doorframe tonight. “Did something happen?” 

“I ordered too much almond tofu.”

For a few moments, he stares at what little of your face is illuminated by the lanterns you’d lit. Then he huffs a laugh. “This is not what I had in mind when I told you to call for me when you needed me.”

“I called because you needed me. But you’re not going to like that answer, so I just ordered too much almond tofu.”

Xiao falters, closing your door and leaning against it. “That’s not how this works. I’m a weapon, not a hero like you.”

“Really? You’re saying that after what you did in the Chasm?”

“Just doing my job.”

“Do you think,” you stand and walk toward him. Almost instinctively, his arm comes up to catch around your waist. “That we all think that of you? That the Arataki gang will let you go without considering themselves to owe you a huge debt? That Yanfei and Yelan would so soon forget what you did tonight? That I would say nothing after what you did?”

You’re not sure he knows he’s doing it, but he pulls you closer, hooking his chin over your shoulder. 

Gently, you push him away. With clumsy movements, you remove the bulkier pieces of his outfit - the shoulder guard, the necklace, the mask at his waist. With every physical item you remove, you hope to relieve some of the emotional burden in his heart, although you strongly doubt you’re having any success on that front. 

Xiao helps you where he can, but he spends most of the time watching in silence. He’s deep in thought still. Always is. Besides, Xiao staring and watching is not unlike him. He does it often, though usually from rooftops and not right before you. 

And then, when the last bit of armor is removed and all he has left on him is cloth, he holds your face in both of his hands. They tremble, ever slightly. He searches your eyes for the answer to a question he hasn’t yet asked, the bright amber of his eyes burning into your soul. “If I do something undesirable,” he whispers, “stop me.”

With that, his lips are on yours, a gentle and uncertain movement. Your hand grips his sleeve as he continues his unfamiliar movements. He’s not accustomed to this, you can tell, but neither are you. Indeed, the kiss is hesitant in a way Xiao usually is not.

When you pull away for air, he touches his lips as if they had been burned. A fire lights in his eyes, but not the kind that you usually see on the battlefield. No, this is - unexpectedly - fear. Shame. The mortalest of feelings from someone who makes daily mockery of mortal habits.

“You didn’t stop me,” he whispers.

“It wasn’t undesirable.” You hold a hand out to him again, a lifeline should he choose to take it. “It was fine. You can do it again if you want to.”

Maybe you should ask him what it means.

Maybe you should ask about the deep-rooted vulnerability bubbling to the surface of his existence.

Maybe you should extract some adepal promises from him before anything else.

But you don’t. 

Slowly, Xiao approaches again. Interesting, seeing him like this. To be honest, perhaps this is the reason you ask for nothing at all. That he fears the interaction means he understands the gravity of it. That he hesitates means he’s considering it carefully.

He lands the next kiss on your forehead, just a little peck of a motion.Then your cheek. The trail continues down your neck, his still-gloved hands gripping the cloth of the bed under you. “When I was falling,” he murmurs into your skin, “I thought of you.”

When he pulls away this time, he drifts over to the table where the box of almond tofu sits. He’s still talking, but he’s not quite looking at you anymore. You understand. Vulnerability is exponentially harder when you make eye contact, and Xiao has never been one for vulnerability in the first place. 

“Come sit with me?” He pleads. 

Pleads. Xiao, Conqueror of Demons, pleading to someone like you. 

“When you were falling,” you tell him, “I hated you.”

Xiao flinches. A moment later, a stony expression falls on his face again. “I was waiting for that.”

“I hated you because you gave yourself up so quickly.”

“I tried my best!” he retorts. “I used up everything-”

“That’s exactly what I’m saying. You used up everything and acted like I wouldn’t forever blame myself for losing you.”

“It wouldn’t have been your fault.”

“It would’ve felt like it.”

Slowly, Xiao chews his food. You’re almost certain he’s not tasting it at all, simply going through the motions because it’s there in front of him.

Deciding to speak in his language, you fill the silence with, “You’re the only thing standing between Liyue and destruction. What would they have done with you gone?”

“They have you.”

“They wouldn’t have me if you weren’t here,” you say honestly. Liyue… Is a beautiful place, but the reason you keep coming back to it is not because of the nation itself. You care nothing for Liyue, to be honest, in the face of the care you have for Xiao. “Besides, I have other places to go. Aether… I still have to find him.” 

This, of everything you’ve said thus far, ought to be what Xiao understands the most. In the first place, he was in the Chasm to find someone who was like a brother to him. 

You lapse into silence again, giving Xiao a chance to speak. Perhaps you can’t drag things out of him this way. Perhaps only the heavy silence can drive him to break it by voicing his own thoughts. 

He watches you, like he always does, and says nothing. Not yet. 

Just as you doze off - and probably because you’re dozing off - he speaks again. “I don’t know when the last time I did something for myself was. But I think I will now… I didn’t plan to fall in love with you.” 

Blinking back to wakefulness, you tilt your head. “So that’s what it meant,” you muse out loud. “The kiss.” 

Xiao seems to try to shrink away from you. Then he recovers himself and continues, “Last night was the first time in a long time that I was afraid of death. I have always had many things to die for. I had nothing to live for, not until you.”

“Will you, then?”

“You already have my allegiance, traveler.”

“But what if I want more than allegiance?”

“What more is there to want?”

“You. All of you, not just your spear. … You are not the only one who fell in love without a plan.”

[meimi-haneoka]

Cardcaptor Sakura Clear Card Chapter 53: Comments + JP-ENG translation differences

Hello everyone!

How this month of April has been for everyone? Once again we’re here for a chapter release! Thankfully this month we don’t have anything big (WHOA), at least not on “Mana”’s levels hahaha! It’s going to be minor things and some stuff particularly hard to convey properly in English (guess what, yes, I’m talking about the last line of the chapter). I guess I’ll have more room to ramble with my usual stupid commentary? 😆

BUT FIRST

GIF OF THE MONTH:

I’m not even a bit subtle with this one, hahahaha

Ready ? Under the cut!!!

YELAN-SAMA ON THE COVER!

YES!

THIS IS NOT A DRILL LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, YELAN ON THE COVER PAGE!! Seriously, we’ve been showered with this gorgeous woman this past month?? Let me just tell you that this CAN’T and WILL NOT be unrelated, Yelan will definitely be relevant to the final part of this Clear Card Arc. At this point is certain. They even felt the need, as you can see above, to add a little introductory panel with her basic info: “Syaoran’s mother, who lives in Hong Kong. She has blood ties to Clow Reed and strong magical powers”. So if the audience needs to know who she is (are you kidding me, we all saw movie 1, right? hahah), it means she’ll be relevant. And I am absolutely thrilled about that!! 

D-D-D-DOUBLE DATE?!

The chapter starts with one of the usual Kero/Suppi scenes, where Suppi wakes up pretty early and doesn’t find Sakura in her bed. Understandably (?) worried because it’s just 6 am, he tries to wake her guardian (pppfttt) up and abruptly ends his ridiculous dream. But Kero remembers! She must have woken up early, because..... They find her in the kitchen arranging a bento for that GODDAMN date! AT LAST! XDDD SUNDAY CAME, thanking GOD. (I’ll regret this later)

Sakura explains that she woke up so early because she’s challenged herself with a new menu (so she needed the right time to do everything) and Kero starts the usual DATE!!! teasing. At this point I don’t know why Sakura still blushes so much and insists in using the word “odekake” (going out) 😂😂😂 And I bitterly laughed at her saying “I want him to eat all of the bento I prepared” because HONEY, you just know sh*t is bound to happen and that bento will last very little! 🤣

While Kero keeps pestering her with useless jokes, Suppi actually takes on the role of the serious mascot chara and reminds her that they’ll be in stand-by at home, and if she needs them, she will just need to call Kero’s phone. And then he adds:

JP: “ Well, even if something comes up, I'm sure the person who's with you will do his best (implied: to protect you)" I think using that 頑張るでしょう makes it a lot sweeter than the ENG version, imo!

But holy moly, what do we have here? We switch to Shinomoto house, and we get A LOVELY Akiho getting all pretty and ready for something?? I found extremely SWEET that she asked Momo’s opinion on her outfit, even if she couldn’t talk to her. I’ve said in my Akiho masterpost that Momo is really her strength, she gives her courage and helps her feel a little bit more self-confident,even when she’s all alone. Momo, on her part, just decided to make me cry, because she’s SO SUPPORTIVE of her little girl. She comments in her mind that her outfit is lovely, especially the braids she skillfully made! Akiho seems so nervous, what does she have in mind?  When Akiho mentions "I'm all prepared" in the ENG text, in the JP she actually mentions 下調べも出来てる which translates as "to prepare, to study the situation" or also literally as 'preliminary investigation' so this actually reveals that she actually made a whole research, probably checked address, ways to get to a certain place, etc., that's why we see books and supposedly a map in that panel! 😆 But what for? Hehehe...

JP, Akiho: “I’ve checked three times what I have to bring with me” “Now, I need to just say it" Momo, thinking: "YES. JUST SAY IT." Momo’s line made me crack up when I understood what this was about, because she meant it in a "Yas, you do not ask this time. YOU DIRECTLY ORDER HIM" way! 🤣🤣🤣

God, what is all this fuss about?

Kaito knocks at the door, but he doesn’t even make it in time to peek from the door of Akiho’s room (let me rant just a second: DOESN’T HE STILL LOOK A LITTLE AFRAID TO INTERACT WITH HER? LOL what’s with peeking from the door like that) that she LITERALLY RUSHES TO HIM like a bullet train or something, shouting as a literal order  JP: “It’s sunny outside! I’ve made bento (for us)! LET’S GO OUT!!”

What possessed this girl, omg. NAH this is MY BABY QUEEN Akiho who raised her head and is still walking on her road to determination and assertiveness, here! I knew she wouldn’t stop there, after the very sad scene of last month. She’s too worried for him. And she loves him a lot. She just can’t abandon him like that, even if he tries to run away from her attempts at supporting him. So she changed tactics. Instead of offering, asking, she just simply stated “we’re going out”. Kaito’s face and his “...okay”, with that wobbling bubble that suggests he’s weirded out, is just priceless for how shocked he is. XD

The Botanical Garden of Hell

We find out that Syaoran brought Sakura again to the botanical garden!! Maybe as an attempt to recover their first date, that didn’t really end up well?? Hahah...hahahahah....Syaoran...you poor fool-

We have another sweet SyaoSaku moment, with them so comfortable now to be lovey-dovey and say lowkey romantic stuff to eachother...The blush is still there of course but it’s not exaggerated like the beginning of this arc!! Syaoran finally shows to be a gentleman and offers to bring the lunchbox (small note, "The least I can do is carry a basket for you" technically is not wrong but...it's just not there in the JP text. Syaoran is a few words man. He just says "You prepared it for me, so I'll bring it"), but it’s in that moment that Sakura spots someone....Akiho and Kaito!!

But hold on....someone is totally not pleased with this (and I don’t mean just some of you hiding out there, I see you! 😆)....someone with big rabbit ears...

MOMO-SAMA is totally not pleased with her beloved kids’ date “ruined” by this CASUAL meeting! XD  Between the ENG and JP text we have a bit of text shuffled around (probably for problems of space?), for example: - Where Momo says "Why now?" in the ENG, in the JP it's "And why did they ran into eachother (now)?" but this is added in the next page so maybe it was a matter of space - Where Momo says "they went all the trouble of going out" I actually think she's meaning something like "I know it's the same town and all, but", in the meaning of "for how small this town is, what were the chances they would run into eachother??" - While the JP text doesn’t exactly say "loved ones", Momo did mention the word 二人っきり "futarikkiri" which means "two all alone/tete-a-tete" and it's usually used with romantic undertones, in this kind of context. Also, she mentions “sorezore” so she’s including SyaoSaku too in her exasperated line, while placing on the same level the two....”situations”.

Man, gotta love this creature. She’s a friggin’ shipper 🤣 And she’s well intent in beating the sh*t out of Kaito if he tries to do anything that isn’t just spending time with Akiho!! Because while in the ENG text she just says “If you think of doing anything but spending time with Akiho...you’ll have me to answer to, Yuna D. Kaito!”, in the JP text she’s actually more straightforward: “I will ruin you!!” ( 手荒に行くわよ means "I'll go rough/violent on you").

At the botanical garden, the four “friends” are setting up a picnic all together, resigned to just have to spend time together since they ran into eachother multiple times inside the botanical garden itself 😂😂😂 Sakura, out of kindness, asks to Akiho if it’s okay for her to not stay alone with Kaito, but she just says (with a slight blush) that she’s already quite content to have dragged him out  to be able to spend time with him, like this. They probably never did something like this, before.... But something isn’t right. Why is Syaoran all smiley while he’s arranging stuff on the ground with Kaito? ....BECAUSE THE LITTLE SH*T PUT A SPELL ON HIM, THAT’S WHY XD I don’t know if it’s an extension of the spell he put on him before, but the result is that Syaoran is forced to smile even if he doesn’t want to! Because OF COURSE, if it was for him, he’d be scowling at Kaito the whole time, worrying and raising suspicions on Sakura!....and also ruining the girls’ fun! Little note on how Syaoran calls Kaito in the ENG version: he says “this man”, but in the JP text, even in previous chapters, Syaoran always called him as “ano hito”, “that person”. I kinda wanted to point it out because lately it’s become pretty apparent that Kaito is actually younger than the readers think. BUT BACK TO THE SMILES. I’M SORRY BUT I LAUGHED SO MUCH at this scene. XD Out of all, OF ALLLL the scary things Kaito could do to Syaoran, he’s forcing him....to smile! That’s a friggin’ torture for him! Their passive-aggressive smiles are priceless. Meanwhile, Yukito and Nakuru like two good siblings have an update videochat with Suppi and Kero, where we find out that Touya is working at the botanical garden!!! 

OF COURSE!

BECAUSE SH*T IS ABOUT TO GO DOWN, NO?

When Touya and Sakura run into eachother at some public place, there’s DOOOOOM. XD And it’s in that precise moment, before starting to eat, that Akiho sees Touya picking up garbage in the park....and shouts:

ENG: “Is that your brother...?” JP: (Your) Brother!

Look at this translation difference, because it’s actually quite tricky.

"Onii-sama" is a normal way for a young girl like Akiho (or even younger) to address an older male in a polite way, even when they aren’t close. But, said like that, it also looks like Akiho is calling Touya "brother!". Sakura must have felt an uncomfortable feeling probably connected to the world Momo had tried to show to her. This is similar to when her father told her "You and Akiho look more and more similar". She felt the same ominous feeling.

SO WHAT EXACTLY are we getting ourselves into?? Is the final showdown coming?? And what about the play, then? Will something bad happen immediately in the next chapter or they’ll go back to eat those poor bento?? Chapter 54 is going to be the last one of the future volume 11, so it’s gonna be HUGE. With a HUGE cliffhanger. I can’t really wait to see if Kaito’s will to not cause anything will last more than a lunchtime! 🤣

Thank you so much for reading my commentary/bragging of this month, and I want to remind you the next appointment with Clear Card 54: - On June 3rd, on Nakayoshi magazine (5 years of Clear Card!! Yes!) - On June 1st, on CLAMP-FANS website (Youtube) - On May 31st, on Comixology 

See you next month, and my DMs are open for any questions/comments on this chapter!!

[andthepetalsfall]

disappointment, a lump swallowed with each bite

Summary: Syaoran’s relationship with Yelan is complicated.

A/N: I had a friend post this a while back on AO3 as an orphaned fic (she came up with the title), mostly because I felt I might have revealed too much about myself. But I feel there’s so much about Syaoran’s Cantonese heritage left unexplored, both by fandom and CLAMP, that I want to tap into it myself. Writing this felt a little raw, but it meant a lot that this resonated so much with Canto readers I thought I’d share it here. I hope you enjoy.

[AO3]

Syaoran’s life has been a series of disappointments, one after the other.

Disappointment is the first memory his mother shares with him over dinner. “When I married, I moved to Hong Kong to be with your father’s family,” she explains.

He nods as he ravenously shovels roast pork into his mouth and his eldest sister reminds him to chew slowly.

“But I was originally from Shanghai. I tried to teach you Shanghainese when you were very small, but you never used it.”

“You used to cry, ‘I want to talk to Mama!’ because she doesn’t understand Shanghainese,” the second eldest suddenly remembers with a bright smile.

“Yes, and she would tell me, ‘You married into a Cantonese family, let the boy speak what he wants. You have to teach him Mandarin and Japanese later on anyway.’ You were so resistant, your Mama asked what the point was of teaching you Shanghainese when your sisters spoke it but never used it.”

His mother reaches for more gailan. Although his mother and grandmother had shown nothing but respect for each other, he’d always noticed a cold air between them. “I remember I was very...”

She doesn’t need to finish the sentence. Syaoran doesn’t say anything and picks up the pork more delicately.

…

It’s the third Qing Ming Jie since his father’s death and he can’t relate to any of the stories his sisters and mother laugh over as they lay out the food and incense.

“Didi, you remember?” his Ga Jeh asks. “All our cousins were playing with each other, but you stayed in the corner practicing your magic by yourself. You were two.”

“You always wanted to be alone, even back then,” the second sister adds.

“Baba was laughing at you and called you his little lone wolf,” the fourth sister says.

“Oh, is that where ‘Syaoran’ comes from?” His family never used his real name, it was baobei to his mother and didi to his sisters. On occasion they called him Syaoran or Siu Long, dialect chosen on a whim.

But when he frowns, they see he doesn’t remember any of it, so they silently reach for the incense and pray. He looks at the red name etched on the tombstone and the emptiness he feels hits him like a train. How must Baba feel knowing his only son doesn’t remember him?

He already knows the answer and as he takes the incense, all he can think is, I’m sorry.

…

“Again.”

For the thirty-fourth time in a row (he’s been keeping track in his head), he strikes his sword into the ground and in a split second the faintest trace of a magic circle glows beneath him. Then, just as suddenly, it fades.

His mother rubs her temples and Syaoran braces himself for the lecture coming to him.

“How many times have we tried this and you still don’t understand it?”

He doesn’t protest that he’s trying, because she’ll only counter that he’s not trying hard enough.

“Your mind is off somewhere else and you’re not focusing properly. Do you not understand how vital it is that you get this right? Don’t you know what it means to be a descendant of Clow Reed? The only magic child of this family, no less!”

He doesn’t say that technically, they’re descendants of his mother’s family, and that Syaoran’s own mother wasn’t related to him either, just married in.

Still, his mother somehow senses what’s on his mind and says, “I know it is not my bloodline. But when I married your father, his family became my family. You think your Mama just let any random outsider marry her only son? No, it didn’t matter that I had magic in my veins. It took me ten years to perfect my magic and even be considered worthy of the prestige of the Lei clan! And now you have a chance to be Master of the Clow because it is your birthright! What did I work so hard for if all you want to do is throw it away?”

Syaoran bites his lip and feels hot shame welling up inside him. He fixes his stare at the ground so his mother doesn’t see his wet eyes.

“Don’t look at the floor. Look at me.”

He complies and sniffles.

“Do you want to be Master or not? Answer me.”

“I do,” he whispers, unable to control the shakiness in his voice. All he wants is to be like any other second-grader and go play at the park or something.

“Masters of the Clow don’t cry. Go again.”

The thirty-fifth time isn’t much better than the last, and he can slowly feel his mother giving up.

…

As he holds the results of his Japanese exam, his hands tremble. He’s not worried about his other scores, but he’ll need to work twice as hard in this area if he wants to keep up with his Japanese classmates next year.

That semester had been a flurry of sleepless nights, cramming and studying over and over to perfect his language skills. It had been one of the few times in his life when his mother relaxed her strict exterior, quietly bringing a bowl of sweet pears to his room and placing it on his desk.

“Study hard, baobei.”

He sharply inhales as he opens up his results, and exhales when he sees the red 100 on his kanji scores. His eyes scale down to keigo.

96.

Four points. He was only four points away.

He’s far, far from the bottom of his class, but it’s not enough. The endless complaints from his classmates, none of whom he’s ever played with or been friends with, saying, “My mom always asks why you can’t be like your classmate Lei!” or praise from his teachers, “Let’s all follow Lei tung hok’s example,” are never enough for the Lei clan.

He neatly folds the exam and slides it into his backpack.

…

When he submits his papers to Tomoeda elementary he gives them his real name. It sounds foreign even to him.

“Rei—” the office lady frowns. “Sorry, how do you pronounce that?”

Maybe he shouldn’t have started off with Cantonese. And then he has the craziest idea. “Ah—never mind,” he says, furiously scribbling out his name. “Use this one.”

She purses her lips into a tight line. “Ookami?”

“It’s, ah, a traditional name,” he lies through his teeth, hoping his accent isn’t too heavy. “Li Syaoran.”

“The Chinese use such interesting kanji,” she murmurs, scribbling down some notes. He doesn’t remind her that kanji came from China first.

“Well, you’ll be in Terada-sensei’s room, Li-san. It’s down that way.”

It all fits, in a way. When has he ever been worthy of his own name?

…

“He speaks kinda funny.”

“Chiharu-chan, he’s from Hong Kong. You can’t expect him to speak perfectly on his first day,” the quiet girl with chestnut colored hair reminds her.

“I heard Terada-sensei saying if he needed help he could talk to Tomoyo-chan,” the one with glasses interjects. “The way he repeated her name was sooooo cute. Daaai-daaau-jiii.”

It’s not malicious, the way they’re giggling. But he keeps his expression stony and vows not to say any other name.

...

His face is burning as he runs. He’s failed to retrieve the cards on his first day, and the boy…

The boy was beautiful.

He thinks of his mother’s warning. “Don’t play around with girls.” She’d wrinkled her nose. “Especially Japanese girls. You remember what they did to our country?”

She’d never thought to warn him about boys. It would never cross her mind he would tell her something like that.

He prays, prays, prays he’ll never need to.

...

The ocean wind is icy and pinches at his skin, but he’ll never show weakness like the girl beside him. How was this whimpering thing, who was never raised with a quarter of the discipline he has, deemed more worthy to be Master than he was?

But the more she talks, the more he realizes he has never known a night like this. A night of no training, no studying. Just the crashing of ocean waves and a light conversation under the moonlight.

He’s not thinking when he says, “Well, I feel that way about him too, but…”

He freezes as he realizes and holds his gaze at her, anxiously waiting for her response. What will she say? Will she tell people? What if, Heaven forbid, it gets back to his family?

But she carries on like it’s nothing. He’s brave enough to press her further about her infatuation, and she asks him the same.

“Both you and I are so much younger than Yukito-san, but we can’t help it,” she says. “We just… like him.”

When she smiles, it’s genuine. It’s serene. There is no judgment in her jade eyes.

When his form reappears in the cave, she doesn’t reprimand him for not having the strength to fight off the card. She thanks him.

It’s a foreign feeling.

…

“They call me a different name, Ma.”

Even though she’s only on the phone, he knows she’s frowning. “Oh? And what’s wrong with the name we gave you?”

“They can’t pronounce it. It has nothing to do with you.” With the safety of distance, he can be a little bolder.

“And this new girl? How does she have the cards?”

“Cerberus chose her. There’s really nothing I can do about it, especially a Guardian made by Clow himself.”

“Hm. Are they treating you well?”

He thinks of those jade green eyes. “The people in Japan are very nice, Ma.”

“I see.”

An awkward silence hangs between them.

“Baobei?”

“Mm?”

“Have you eaten yet?”

“Yes,” he lies, eyeing the sword he’s been practicing with all night.

“Never forget to eat, Baobei. You need your strength.”

“I’ll keep that in mind, Ma.”

...

She’s shocked when he tells her he lives alone.

“Then you have to do all the laundry and cleaning and cooking all on your own?”

Okay, maybe it’s a little odd for a ten-year-old to live alone in an apartment, but it’s not like she doesn’t do housework either.

“Well… yeah.”

“That’s so cool!”

There’s not an ounce of sarcasm in her voice, which flusters him.

“But… don’t you get lonely?”

Lonely?

He’s never been asked that before. He thinks of the phone call with his mother the night previously, where she instructed him to keep an eye on “the new girl” and reminded him to dress warmly.

“Not really.”

“So cool!” the girl gushes.

It’s such a trivial thing, housework. Maybe she’ll praise anything, but she’s never commented on his shortcomings.

Before he can say anything, her stomach grumbles. It makes the corner of his lips twitch.

…

His hands are trembling as he tells his mother the news. No, he won’t be Master of the Clow.

Sakura is.

He has a million counterarguments backed up in his head—no, he didn’t just give up. (Okay, maybe he did.) Yue deigned it. He was not about to go against two Guardians of Clow’s own creation. Clow predicted this would happen, anyway.

But she doesn’t yell. She doesn’t scold.

“Good,” she sighs. “I’m glad you were able to help this Kinomoto girl achieve her birthright.”

“Her birthright?” Syaoran asks, half surprised and half amused.

“Aiyooh, if Clow wanted it, who are we to go against him? He ought to have left some hints, though!”

He almost laughs.

“You did your best, baobei. And you helped the new Master. For that I’m grateful.”

Syaoran doesn’t know what to say, but maybe no words need to be said.

“Now, this Kinomoto—you certainly talk about her a lot.”

“What are you saying, Ma?”

“Is she your girlfriend?”

“MA!”

“Aiyah, don’t be like that, I’m your mother! You have to tell me everything!”

[lilover131]

New CCS Oneshot!

Hi there everyone! I have written another CCS oneshot I would like to share as a thank you for reaching 700 followers! THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH!! 

This idea came to me all of a sudden, and I just felt the urge to write it immediately! I hope you all enjoy it! The links are below, but for those who are iffy about links, please feel free to also read below the cut! If you like it, please leave kudos/comments/reviews, as they are MUCH appreciated!! 

TITLE: The One Worth Dying For 

SUMMARY:  On a stormy summer night in Hong Kong, Yelan has gone into a dangerous labor with her 5th and final child. It is an exciting occasion for the Li Clan, as this may be the magical heir they've all been waiting for. However, Shiefa, the second oldest daughter, is not as happy as everyone else about this new sibling...

LINKS: 

FF.NET LINK--> HERE

AO3 LINK--> HERE 

                                         The One Worth Dying For

 “What’s wrong, Shiefa? You’ve had a grumpy face all night”

 Little Shiefa looked up at her father, who had a calm expression despite the roaring thunder outside and the situation just past the double doors across the hall. She fidgeted in her seat, clinging to the green colored pajamas she wore. Shiefa was the second oldest child of the family, about seven years of age, and one of four daughters to Yelan Li, the powerful head of the Li clan.

 “I’m not grumpy…”

 Shiefa responded with an unconvincing tone and her soulful brown eyes gazed back to the doors of her parent’s room. Her father sat beside her in the antique horseshoe chair just beside her and placed a hand upon hers. It was clear to see that she was upset about something, and he was determined to find out what.

 “Is that so? You don’t appear to be too excited about your new sibling…your sisters almost couldn’t sleep because of their excitement, but you seem restless for another reason”

 The little girl tensed ever so slightly, but noticeably. It was no secret to the Li clan that she and all her sisters had been born without magic, and their mother was still under pressure to produce an heir. After having four children, Yelan’s body had surely been through so much already, so this fifth child was incredibly taxing on her physically. Yelan had been on bed rest for several weeks now, but tonight, on an evening with such a strong storm raging outside fueled by the humid summer of Hong Kong, she had gone into labor, and it was proving to have many complications.

 “…I don’t need another sibling. Why are they so important anyways? Because they might have magic? Futtie, Fanren, Feimei, and I can lead the clan together…we don’t need an heir with powers…”

 Her father was a bit surprised by this statement, but he could also understand where she was coming from. The magical world could be a very competitive place, and it was of the upmost importance for the leaders of each clan to produce an heir. Most children that were born without magic were seen as disappointments, but the Li clan treasured all of their offspring, magic or not. However, despite the Li Clan’s more progressive outlook, the need to keep magic alive in the family was still very important, and this must have unintentionally brought much guilt to his daughters.

 “Your new sibling, whether they are born with power or not, will be no more important than you or your sisters. Your mother is a very strong woman who takes her duties very seriously, but her love for her children will always take precedence.”

 Shiefa raised her head to look back at her father, this time with a look of anger.

 “But she is willing to die for her duty…”

 Her father frowned at this and gently squeezed her hand.

 “Why do you say that?”

 “I overheard the family doctors talking the other day. They were talking about how this child is taking a lot out of Mother and may even kill her…so why is it so important? Doesn’t she love us enough to live?”

 Shiefa had tears burning in her eyes, and her father suddenly seemed to understand the situation. It was no wonder why she was reacting so differently from her sisters, now that he knew she had overheard such a thing. He was silent for a few moments, thinking carefully about his next words. He couldn’t lie to her…she was too smart for that.

 “Yes, it is true that this labor will be difficult, but your mother is the most stubborn woman I know. She will not be defeated by this. And it is not duty she is risking herself for, Shiefa…”

 The girl wiped at the stray tears in her eyes and tried to remain strong. She was a tough child, perhaps the strongest of the daughters, but she was still a child nonetheless. Her father reached his arms over to grab hold of her and lift her to sit on his lap. Her heard naturally rested on his chest, and her body curled into his gentle embrace.

 “You may not be old enough to understand this yet, but life is a truly precious thing. There are few things worth risking it for, and I can tell you that magic is not one of them. However, bringing another life into the world…now that is something really spectacular. I never realized there was anything I could love as much as your mother until you and your sisters were born…”

 Shiefa looked up to him, rather surprised.

 “Really? Even though we were born without magic?”

 Her father nodded with a gentle smile on his face.

 “Of course! You and your sisters are perfect exactly as you are, and I would never wish for you to change. Your new sibling will need all of you to protect them and show them how to be loving and warm hearted towards others. Can you do that for me?”

 Shiefa paused for a long moment before nodding. Somehow the request felt a little sad, like he was not going to be around to teach this new child himself of the ways of the world.

 “Okay…”

 The man seemed pleased to hear this, and the both of them gazed upwards towards the double doors as there was a sudden loud yell of pain, appearing to be that of Yelan’s voice. Shiefa felt as if her heart had just fallen into her stomach, but then…the rumbling of thunder seemed to stop and the hallway was filled with the soft sound of an infant crying.

 The two stayed very still and waited patiently for several minutes until one of the doctors emerged from the room with a smile on his face.

 “My Lord, the Lady has given birth to a healthy son…!”

 The father instantly rose from his seat, still cradling his daughter in his arms as he made his way to the room. Shiefa couldn’t help but notice that her father’s shoulders dropped upon seeing his wife alive and well, and it was then that she realized how scared he himself had been without showing it. He must have put up a false calm in order to soothe her…

  Once inside, he gently rested Shiefa to sit on the side of the bed and took one of Yelan’s hands in his, kissing the top of it affectionately.

 “My love…you never cease to amaze me…”

 Yelan, although exhausted, smiled back at him and looked down to the newborn resting against her chest. The baby was so small was staring up inquisitively at his mother with big amber eyes. Shiefa hadn’t been old enough to remember the birth of her sisters, so this was the first time she had truly seen an infant that had just been born. It was rather mind boggling for her to see a human so tiny, and the way he looked at their mother was as if she were his entire world. She saw that connection between mother and child already forming, and there was something that stirred within her own heart as well. Shiefa couldn’t quite explain it, but her parents had both seen it in her eyes.

 “Would you like to hold your brother, my little snowflake?”

 Yelan smiled at her daughter who nodded rather eagerly. Gently, her father lifted the newborn and reached over to hand her the baby, making sure he was well supported before he fully released him. Shiefa stared down at her brother, who was looking at her in much the same way as he had with his mother.

 “He’s so small…and his eyes…they’re almost golden, like a wolf”

 Her father chuckled lightheartedly at this comment.

 “Like a wolf, eh? Yelan, have you decided on a name yet?”

 The mother shook her head.

 “No, but I think I have one in mind. How about Xiao Lang?”

 Her husband’s lips curled into a smile and he gave a nod of approval.

 “Small wolf? I think that works nicely”

 Shiefa smiled, perhaps for the first time that evening, and whispered down to her new brother.

 “Xiao Lang…I promise to always protect you, no matter what. And Futtie, Fanren, Feimei will too. We’ll keep you safe and happy, just like big sisters are supposed to”

 The young babe of course did not understand what was being said to him, but he still gave a hopeful look that implied he knew the feelings behind them. Shiefa was pleased with this and beamed at her parents. Her father nodded knowingly at her and reached forward to place a gentle hand on her head.

 “I’m sure you will…”

 ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~Several Years Later*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

 Shiefa fell to the ground roughly after having been struck by her younger brother’s kick. He immediately rushed to her side with a look of worry and guilt on his face.

 “Shiefa, are you all right? I didn’t mean to hit so hard…”

 His sister nodded and slowly got back to her feet, rubbing at bit at her side which had been impacted.

 “I’m fine. I’m tougher than I look, you know. I may be beautiful and feminine looking, but normally I can knock you down with one strike. You’ve gotten stronger…”

 Syaoran’s gaze averted, a serious look in his amber eyes.

 “I’m still not strong enough…I have to get stronger”

 Shiefa smiled at him and placed her fingers underneath his chin, gently angling his head up to look at her.

 “For her, right? The cute girl you met in Japan?”

 Syaoran nodded in determination. His older sister ruffled his hair, which made him scoff slightly in annoyance.

 “What was that for?”

 Shiefa laughed at her brother’s question.

 “You were so cute, I couldn’t resist. So you’re really going to go back to Japan, huh?”

 Her brother nodded again and wiped the sweat from his brow. He and his sister had been sparring in the garden outside as they often did. Although all of his sisters were incredibly talented in martial arts as well, none were quite as challenging as Shiefa. Wei taught him everything he knew, but he was getting too old to fight, and he couldn’t hold back right now when he had so little time left. He needed to get as strong as he could before he returned to Japan. Syaoran learned a great many things from his sisters, but training in magic was primarily done by Yelan. That training was the most brutal of them all, and his family members were concerned that he might be pushing himself too far. Even his mother was concerned, and being the strongest magic user in the Li Clan, this was quite telling.

 Shiefa placed her hands on her hips and her face became more serious.

 “Father, how can I protect this child from himself…?”

 She whispered softly to the air for her father’s angel to hear, and Syaoran rose his head, having heard her speak, but could not understand what was said.

 “Huh?”

 “It’s nothing. I just want you to remember something…”

 Shiefa stepped forward and warmly wrapped her arms around head in a kind embrace. Syaoran blushed in embarrassment from this action.

 “W-what are you doing?”

 He struggled a bit, but was firmly pulled back by his sister so there was no escape.

 “I want you to remember…that your life is precious.”

 Syaoran blinked at the statement, clearly confused as to where this was coming from. Shiefa did not let go of him as she continued.

 “Xiao Lang…don’t you make me break my promise…if you get hurt, you will make your sisters cry!”

 The boy went silent for a long moment and sighed before responding.

 “I don’t know what promise you’re talking about, but I don’t plan on making anyone cry”

 Shiefa suddenly pulled back, but her hands extended to pinch his cheeks and pull them to the side, as if to punish him.

 “Good! We’d never forgive you, you know!”

 Syaoran flailed his arms wildly in pain from the ‘torture’ until his sister finally released him. He massaged his red cheeks to soothe them, however he had been released from one torture to endure another. The remaining three sisters all swarmed around him, having snuck into the garden quite stealthily, and hugged him so tight that he felt the air nearly leave his body.

 “H-hey! I can’t breathe!”

 All the girls laughed and showered him with love, whether he wanted it or not. After all, a promise had been made, and it was one that they intended to keep, no matter what.

 Soon, Syaoran would be going away to Tomoeda with their mother’s permission to help save the girl he loved from unhappiness. But no matter how strong his magic or martial arts skills got, he would always in his family’s eyes be the little baby born in the thunderstorm; the one who was worth dying for.

 THE END

[meimi-haneoka]

LOL....Chapter 42.

I mean, I might have become quite boring by now because ALL the chapters I use these shocked gifs, but.....I can’t help it, every time the chapters bring some shocking factor!! XD

Let me just start this reaction post with one happy announcement:

Remember my battles against illegal early spoilers on the internet? How it hurt the fandom (because people who wanted to wait for the official release were forced to avoid social media or block stuff) and the franchise as well?

Well, I’m glad to announce that chapter 42 has been the first chapter ever to not have any early spoilers leaked before the official releases, ever since Clear Card started in July 2016. It took almost 4 years and a revolution by the hands of CLAMP to obtain this result (with the early release of chapters FOR FREE on the official website in 6 languages).

Beware, I’m not celebrating just yet because next month we may get spoilers circulating again, but this chapter was really nice to be discovered all together, legally, without hurting anyone? It was a nice feeling and since it seems we might be approaching the finale, I think it’s important that we enjoy these chapters all together in a proper way.

Well, after this introduction, let’s delve into Chapter 42 of Clear Card!!

Kaito is a walking dead man

I loved the color splash page. It always makes me happy to see Akiho and Sakura together, but this time the theme is a lot more serious. This is getting intense and the color page reflects that. This is also the first black background in a while, I always loved illustrations with black background even in the old manga.

Sooo last chapter we were left with Sakura overthrowing Kaito’s time magic and still conscious and moving. And shocked to see Syaoran and Kaito fighting. Of course Kaito needs to put a patch on this, because he knows Sakura is that powerful, but he doesn’t want her to know any of this, so he starts to “attack” her with time magic, I believe? And prince charming cleverly thinks that he might better call forth the strongest Sakura Cards in the deck, just to be sure to protect Sakura adequately. Even Kaito recognizes that was a wise move. Sakura is more confused than ever, behind the spirit shield formed by Light & Dark.

Syaoran is so fucking fed up with this that he demands to know why Kaito is here in Tomoeda. He candidly admits that he wants Sakura to produce the new Cards. Syaoran is like “No shit, Sakura’s already been producing a shitton of cards” “But she hasn’t produced the one I want”. When Syaoran asks which card that would be, Mr. I-am-an-asshole-and-I-know-it replies “If I told you that, I fear you’d get terribly angry”

Guys, the glare Syaoran gives Kaito after this one is like.......death sentence. The amount of rage accumulated in this short kid is frightening. Syaoran might be cool and composed, but y’all remember his temper at the beginning of the old manga, right? That wasn’t “just because”, it’s still part of his personality XDD he was taming his rough sides of his personality for Sakura, but for Sakura he’s well ready to pull them out at any convenience.

Meanwhile, we aren’t sure if Sakura is listening to the heated conversation or not, but I think she isn’t because she keeps shouting “what’s going on?? What happened??” even after Kaito straight up said he’s after her Cards. Seeing her struggling and reaching from behind Light & Dark, who are restraining her, is kinda.....giving me TRC war flashbacks. Yes. You might have seen the tweet that is making me earn lots of “WHY CINZIA”, but I’m like this, I’m an ugly bitch who needs to suffer in company. I’ll make a separate TRC/CCS comparison post after ages, for this. XD

The highlight of the chapter

Kaito reveals that he knows that Syaoran came back to Japan after his mother had a divination of the future that he absolutely needs to stop. And, at that moment, ladies and gentlemen....

IT’S HER. THE STAR OF THE CHAPTER. THE ONE THE FANDOM DREAMED OF SEEING IN THE MANGA.

LI YELAN-SAMA.

This is a huge thing because a character that was exclusively in the anime canon-verse (even though that line has been more and more flimsy lately) appeared in the manga too. Syaoran’s mother, and the Li family in general, were often mentioned both in the old and new manga series, but CLAMP somehow were always careful to never show any graphical portray of it. Now, finally, after so long, we have Yelan appearing in the manga too, and she’s exactly like her anime counterpart. Regal, elegant, beautiful. I was literally trembling with excitement when I saw her!! It was.....gosh it was huge.

But one has to wonder: how the hell does Kaito knows about all this stuff? How much did he investigate on the Li family? It’s kinda easy to imagine when he could do that: for a period, Akiho and Kaito lived in Hong Kong. Right before coming to Japan.

We get, thanks to Kaito, the confirmation that nor he, nor Syaoran, were born with the gift of seeing the future. Kaito can, if he follows all the steps, see some glimpses till a certain degree, but nothing comparable to someone specialized in divination art, let alone a yumemi. Here it is, the cursed term so dear to CLAMP, indicating the ones who can see the future in dreams. Kaito says that Sakura can indeed see the future playing out in her dreams, but it’s a future far from being set in stone. She’s basically a beginner yumemi, with confusing and fragmented visions, I’d say. But when she will grow up, she will be a fully fledged yumemi. Kaito says that it’s for the strong people to decide how the future will go. And here we find again the thematic so dear to CLAMP, the future and the choices made to let it go in a direction, or another one. Kaito starts to call forth the Tina Rie Triax spell. Syaoran is like “the hell I’m letting you get away like this” and is preparing to counter-attack with Raitei Shorai, when The Queen™ decides she had enough and screams “NOOO!”, calling her staff on the spot and activating her power towards Syaoran, switching places with him! She literally forced him out of the picture and took his place!! 

The Queen takes agency

LOOK AT THAT FACE! LOOK AT IT WELL. It’s the same determination she had in this scene:

I knew we would see the results of that determination. When she saw the boy she loves risking his life with someone who was attacking him, she took agency and went to the front row.

You can’t keep Sakura in the sidelines like that.

Kaito is quite suprised by the move. Maybe because he doesn’t understand love or because he didn’t think she would take agency. Either way, Sakura is pointing her staff at him, the same way Syaoran was pointing his sword at him moments ago. You don’t mess with this child, Kaito.

And he must certainly know, because he mutters “That’s too bad” and rewinds time, basically chickening out of the picture. XD

Sakura is back with Tomoyo, Akiho, Sonomi and her father, but she knows something is wrong, and she walks away from them for a while to give birth to a new card!! TRANSFER is the name, and it’s the power she used to switch places with Syaoran. The fact is, she doesn’t remember nor she understands why the hell this card is here. 

While at home Kaito thinks to himself (smile always present but blatantly a mere mask) that he needs to hurry up or he’ll be in a fucking big mess because Sakura resisted his time-stopping magic and the Clear Card survived the time rewinding, Sakura at her own home is a nervous wreck. She calls Syaoran because she has the feeling she saw Light & Dark, they don’t remember, but Syaoran confirms that he feels something is off and has the feeling someone made them forget something. Sakura closes the call promising that she would inform him of anything that would come to her mind, but as she inadvertently knocks her Clear Cards off, they all fall facing backwards, save for one: BREAK.

And this, ladies and gentlemen, is how Chapter 42 ends. Leaving us wondering why Sakura is making this dismayed face. She’s either taking it as a bad omen, or she’s remembering what she saw when she captured BREAK, and what caused the birth of the card in the first place. Not only a soulless Akiho talking nonsense in a pretty dress, but also her boyfriend under the robe of the Mysterious Cloaked Figure. Seemingly about to hurt an unconscious Akiho. That is still an open wound in Sakura’s heart, and it’s pretty clear here.

Guys, what can I tell you, this chapter has been a mixture of wonderful surprises, painful TRC recalls, frustrating time rewindings that show us how Sakura and Syaoran are slowly realizing and fighting Kaito’s fuckery with time....I know a good chunk of the fandom doesn’t like this give-and-take-away, it always seems like the final battle is here, but we are tricked everytime. And yet, I do believe that once the story will be over, and after some time we’ll go back to read Clear Card, the time rewindings will show clearly how gradually Sakura was able to overcome and overthrow Kaito’s magic: first it was a finger, then it was an unexplicable sadness, now a new card and the impression to have seen things, and a general uneasiness because something feels off. The kids were even capable of realizing that they were made to forget something. I bet this graduality will feel more interesting and exciting when we’re not forced to wait 1 month between chapters.

Let me know what you think, too!