#i’ve gone thru such a rollercoaster of emotions w being a spring semester admit | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

chemicaljacketslut · 9 months

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the way i’ve changed soo much in the past couple of years.. was just looking thru my instagram (inactive for like 2 yrs) and like. that’s not even me. i don’t even recognize that person. and in some ways i’m definitely better and in a better place but i’m other ways i feel so much worse… and i do think this mostly feels weird bc im in such an unstable transitional period where i have no idea who i am and all i feel is nervous for the future. once i’m on stable footing i probably won’t be put in such a tailspin by some old pictures. but goddamn they are spinnin my fuckin tail tonight

#ghost rants #also i start my first job friday (about time lol) and i’m soo nervv #even though i’ve been wanting to work there (escape room) for years #the shifts are really long and run really late and i’m just. nerv for change #i think it’d be less scary if i had like a little baby 4 hour shift or smth but my first shift is 7 hrs and my second is 9 #like what if it’s scary and i don’t like it (possible just bc of new environment and changes.. can’t stand em)#and then i have to stay there for 7-9 HOURS goddd #just hoping it’s fun ig #just biding my time until college #i’ve gone thru such a rollercoaster of emotions w being a spring semester admit #rn i’m at the point where i’m mostly happy #but also bitter abt all the things i’m missing out on #(normal college process & experience extra help priority esp with rooms)#and especially TRADITIONS… i’m missing soo many first year traditions by not being there during that first fall semester #and i’m ngl that does make me rly sad. for realz #but gotta focus on the positives n such. sigh #i hope i like it there #FOR HOW MUCH TUITION IS GOOD LORD

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