#i'm cool voltaire

[theworstofallpossibleworlds]

The Worst of All Possible Worlds #110: William Gibson's Neuromancer

Hacktivist/irl tiny kitten maia arson crimew (maia.crimew.gay / @nyancrimew) returns to discuss Neuromancer, the 1984 sci-fi novel that coined the term “cyberspace” and inspired a generation of hackers. Topics include breasting boobily up and down stairs, the parallels with 1995's Hackers, and how impressively William Gibson manages to capture the feeling of being perpetually on the run.

[floralcrematorium]

2010s Nostalgia || Hetalia Edition

Hetalia Youtube Nostalgia Playlist | 117 songs | 7hr 5min

• Hey Na Na - Katie Herzig • Viva La Vida - Coldplay • Rasputin - Boney M. • Glad You Came - The Wanted • Hot Mess - Cobra Starship • Counting Stars - OneRepublic • Fireflies - Owl City • Bombshell Blonde - The Jagged Edges • Do Better - Say Anything • Welcome To The Show - Britt Nicole • Dance With The Devil - Breaking Benjamin • Survive - Sick Puppies • Life is Beautiful - Sixx:A.M. • Fairytale - Alexander Rybak • Everybody Loves Me - One Republic • Don't Mess With Me - temposhark • Mimimi - SEREBRO • I Like It Loud - Cash Cash • I Just Wanna Run - The Downtown Fiction • I'm ALIVE! - Becca • Lovestruck - Breathe Electric • I Like To Dance - Hot Chelle Rae • Haven't Had Enough - Marianas Trench • Kiss Me Thru The Phone - Soulja Boy, Sammie • Hard out Here - Lily Allen • Runaway Baby - Bruno Mars • I Don't Care - Fall Out Boy • Airplanes - B.o.B., Hayley Williams • Rock Star - Prima J • This Is War - Thirty Seconds To Mars • Hey Brother - Avicii • Cinderella - Tata Young • Centuries - Fall Out Boy • Déjà Vu - 3OH!3 • Sexy, Naughty, Bitchy Me - Lene Alexandra • Miss Jackson - Panic! At The Disco, LOLO • The Ballad of Mona Lisa - Panic! At The Disco • Europe's Skies - Alexander Rybak • Bad Apple!! - RichaadEB, Cristina Vee • Lying Is The Most Fun A Girl Can Have Without Taking Her Clothes Off - Panic! At The Disco • Let's Kill Tonight - Panic! At The Disco • Hurricane - Panic! At The Disco • Casual Affair - Panic! At The Disco • Never Close Our Eyes - Adam Lambert • Playing With Fire - Ovi, Paula Seling • Angel With A Shotgun - The Cab • Nicotine - Panic! At The Disco • Killer - The Ready Set • How to Be a Heartbreaker - MARINA • This Ain't A Scene, It's An Arms Race - Fall Out Boy • Na Na Na (Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na Na) - My Chemical Romance • Troublemaker - Olly Murs, Flo Rida • Good Girls Go Bad - Cobra Starship, Leighton Meester • I Can't Decide - Scissor Sisters • One Woman Army - Porcelain Black • How To Start A War - Simon Curtis • Maps - Maroon 5 • Do Better - Say Anything • STARSTRUKK - 3OH!3 • Remember Everything - Five Finger Death Punch • The Diary of Jane - Breaking Benjamin • Seven Nation Army - The White Stripes • When You're Evil - Aurelio Voltaire • Canadian, Please - Julia Bentley, Gunnarolla • Sarah Smiles - Panic! At The Disco • Take Me to Church - Hozier • Viking Death March - Billy Talent • Headstrong - Trapt • Semi-Charmed Life - Third Eye Blind • Don't Believe A Word - Third Eye Blind • Warriors - Imagine Dragons • iNSaNiTY - CircusP • Paralyzer - Finger Eleven • I'm Awesome - Spose • 24 - Jem • Clarity - Zedd, Foxes • Hall of Fame - The Script, will.i.am • The Is Gospel - Panic! At The Disco • Immortals - Fall Out Boy • Rather Be - Clean Bandit, Jess Glynne • Wake Me Up - Avicii • a thousand years - Christina Perri • Just Like Fire - P!nk • Safe & Sound - Taylor Swift, The Civil Wars • Safe And Sound - Capital Cities • Everybody Wants To Rule The World - Lorde • Demons - Imagine Dragons • DNA - Little Mix • Remember The Name - Fort Minor, Styles of Beyond • Victorious - Panic! At The Disco • 右肩の蝶 (Butterfly On Your Right Shoulder) - Kagamine Rin/Len • We Are One (Ole Ole) - Pitbull, Jennifer Lopez, Claudia Leitte • Hero - Skillet • Maraca - Mohombi • The Phoenix - Fall Out Boy • DONTTRUSTME - 3OH!3 • Teenage Dream - Katy Perry • SING - My Chemical Romance • Good Time - Owl City, Carly Rae Jepsen • White Rabbit - Egypt Central • Not Gonna Die - Skillet • The Kill - Thirty Seconds To Mars • We No Speak Americano - Yolanda Be Cool, DCup • Nobody's Listening - Linkin Park • Disco Pogo - Die Atzen • German Sparkle Party - The Something Experience • Dirty Little Secret - The All-American Rejects • I Could Be The One - Avicii, Nicky Romero • Can't Hold Us - Macklemore & Ryan Lewis • Still Into You - Paramore • Primadonna - MARINA • Pompeii - Bastille • 恋愛サーキュレーション (Renai Circulation) - 物語シリーズ • Awake And Alive - Skillet • Monster - Skillet • Poker Face - Lady Gaga • Falling Inside The Black - Skillet

[oldfritz]

Hey sorry if this is bothering you but I'm debating someone on reddit rn and they declare that Fritz wasn't queer/gay and was straight and I need like all the sources I can find, so next to my own research I thought I'd ask around as well.

If you can't or don't want to provide that's absolutely fine as well!!!

.....this on r/prussia? I hate that place. Said they don't allow fascists but what do you find in the comments? Fascists. Yeah, I'll help you out. Though, really hun, you're better than arguing with schmucks on Reddit. Don't let the Kaiserboos and Goosesteppers Anonymous take up too much more of your time. Observe them behind glass, take your notes, and go armed into the world.

Anyways, here's my your our sources that make a case for Fritz's queerness (and under a cut for kindness):

Starting off with Fritz's erotic letter to Algarotti. This version is translated by historian, and cool enough guy and Twitter follow, Giles Macdonogh. I appreciate that he gives it a more lyrical feel, as opposed to some literal translations of Fritz's poetry that just make him look overly hackish. Algarotti is noted for a lot of things but what's relevant here is being one of Fritz's possible paramours (and also one of my personal faves). This isn't a smoking gun on its own, but combined with the totality of everything else, it's revealing. Pretty much what the article/Macdonogh raises, I agree with.

Frederick the Great: The Magnificent Enigma by Robert B. Asprey. For all these books, you'll wanna search for- von Keith, Katte, homosexuality, foppishness/effeminacy, Algarotti, Voltaire, Fredersdorf, Elisabeth Christine/the queen. I've got physical copies of all these and have no clue if the Internet Archive versions give you access to the index. Hope they do!

Frederick the Great: King of Prussia by Tim Blanning. In chapter three, "The Making of Frederick," there's a big ass section about his queerness. Some people disagree with how Blanning translates his French; he certainly has a flare for the dramatics just comparing differing English and German translations.

Frederick the Great by Giles Macdonogh.

Iron Kingdom by Christopher Clark. He leads you to some interesting primary sources, even if I find his conclusion rather milquetoast.

Frederick the Great by Nancy Mitford.

If you can read German, here's a database of everything Fritz has ever written. You see a letter mentioned in one of the books above, you can find it for yourself! Goes for his memoirs too and a bunch of other shit. Searching for the names above (sans his wife) would be a good starting point.

Happy arguing!

[coquelicoq]

last week marked a full year since i started a daily habit of reading french fiction to myself out loud, so i took a picture of the books i finished in the last twelve months to commemorate the occasion!

as you can see, there are nine books total but two of the books (count of monte-cristo and les mis) take up fully half the volume, which makes sense because the first six of the twelve months were devoted to just those two behemoths. full list:

Le Comte de Monte-Cristo, Tomes I et II, Alexandre Dumas père

Les Misérables, Tomes I et II, Victor Hugo

La fin de Chéri, Colette

Le Tour du monde en 80 jours, Jules Verne

Exercices de style, Raymond Queneau (this one i read in both paperback and audiobook; the audiobook is stacked on top)

Changer l'eau des fleurs, Valérie Perrin

Claudine à l'école, Colette et Willy

Candide ou l'Optimisme, Voltaire

Le mur, Jean-Paul Sartre

la fin de chéri was both the shortest book and the hardest to read! there was a lot of vocab i wasn't familiar with, and the syntax was a real challenge. colette LOVES her a comma. like, she uses commas to do so many different things i can never really tell what any given comma is supposed to be doing. she might as well just not use punctuation at all. also, i only discovered this like five months after the fact, but it's apparently a sequel?? i was super confused by a bunch of stuff that seemed pretty unexplained and it turns out there was a reason for that lol (the reason being the explanations were in a totally different book). i also just, like, didn't really like the story 😩 rip me!

cmc and les mis were both books i had read previously in english but never in french. exercices du style and probably about half of le mur i had read for college french (if you look closely you can see the spines of those two are a more faded color because i've had them for 15 years lol). the rest were brand new to me. changer l'eau des fleurs was the only book published in the current century. so much great vocab in that one...i really gotta read more stuff from the last few years. also it made me cry big time.

i think i'm gonna keep up this daily habit, but i'd like to expand to poetry and possibly? even non-fiction?? at some point?? francophones feel free to rec me stuff! i'm trying to work my way through some of the really classic french canon, so next up i'm thinking maybe le fantôme de l'opéra, cyrano de bergerac, and at least the first volume of à la recherche du temps perdu? i also want to read more recent stuff, so i've been looking at winners of readers' choice prizes and whatnot, but suggestions from actual individuals would be grand. i think some scifi could be cool maybe, but i don't know anything about french-language scifi and have no idea where to start...

non-french francophone authors would also be really great if you have any suggestions!

[gilsart]

Are there any books you can recommend about Friedrich? German or English would be nice.

By the way, your art is so damn cute and adorable!! I am always happy to see you on my dashboard, even if you're "just" answering questions as you seem really nice.

hi!! first of all thank you ,,, means a lot to me, i always re-read my answers to make sure i don't sound rude or anything 😭 anxiety girlies where you at

about the books, there are lots!! i recommend you also ask @kattestrophe - she knows more than i do, especially about the german books; i am neither german nor english so some of those i own aren't available in languages other than my own.

the ones from my collection that are available in english/german are:

frederick the great by william f. reddaway - this is a biography, available in english, i haven't read it all because i only needed the crown prince bit, and that one had historical inaccuracies, so be mindful. but it has images!!

king in prussia by rafael sabatini - this is fiction and also available in english! it's a book from 1944 i believe, divided in two parts, specifically before katte's death and after katte's death up until ... i think the end of the seven years war? i don't know, i haven't read it all and i will stop at katte's death. fritz is very gay in this one as far as i've read, but in a queer disney villain way, which can be fun if you decide to ignore the homophobia. also one of the protagonists is katte's entirely fictional jacobite cousin, the most annoying man on earth.

zeithain by michael roes - this also is fiction, and only available in german. i have only read five pages of it (my german is very poor) and it follows katte, not friedrich. katte is also very sad. but as far as i was told, both of them are gay, so there's that. so far hans is like "it's raining and i'm alone and last week i went to a funeral. i have prayed to the god i lost during my childhood", certainly something very different from how he behaves in king in prussia ...

katte: die geschichte einer freundschaft by gertrud von brockdorff - this is also german only, i'm not sure about the actual book being available (i was sent a pdf) although it could be available in germany?? it is pretty old tho (1934) so i wouldn't know much about that. this one is also more about katte and friedrich, again fiction, it's eight chapters, still haven't read it because this bad boy is written in fraktur and i have trouble reading that but i have had conversations about it, and boy is it queer. there is a single chapter in which katte has a small identity crisis and has a romance with wilhelmine, but after that he's back to longing for frédéric and his "wide, bright and impenetrable" eyes that bewitch everyone. fellas is it gay to think your male friend's eyes are what you need a woman to have so you can actually love her?

the sorrows of frederick by romulus linney - available in english, this is a play from 1966, still haven't read it (the package is somewhere in europe right now), i think it follows all of fritz's life? it has fredersdorf, at least. but fredersdorf here knows katte, so eh. some anachronistic thingies here and there, what's new.

der alte fritz in 50 bildern - i can't figure out the name of the authors (damn it, fraktur) but worry not: this only has somewhat cool illustrations about fritz's life and a little bit of german text. at least some of them are. others are peculiar: voltaire is shorter than fritz in these. he wishes. i'm adding a photo though, so you can see!

i also own a pretty interesting book, not about fritz but about the seven years war in general, titled "prussian army soldiers and the seven years' war: the psychology of honour" by katrin and sascha moebius (there is an umlaut on the o there; i'm writing this on my pc and don't know where to find it).

i also have "later selected poems" by sheenagh pugh, which contains "five voices", a cycle of five poems showing five different perspectives on katte, if you're interested in that. there isn't a fritz perspective, though.

he also has a short chapter in "bad gays" by huw lemmey and ben miller, but i found it to be somewhat offensive at some point, although that could be a translation issue: there is a pretty offensive slur and some things i found to be inaccurate. overall i wouldn't buy it. i only bought it because the italian edition has very cool illustrations, at a time where i did not know about this translation thing.

the rest of my books are all available in italian only (or about voltaire).

hope this was helpful!

[darknadaworld]

Antasma for the ask game 🙂

was waiting for this tbh lol

favorite thing about them

same as dreambert, the concept and design. also the fact that he's canonically so freakim itty bitty and pathetic yet he freakim petrified a WHOLE KINGDOM . like yes king slay

least favorite thing about them

the amount of WASTED POTENTIAL. much as everything in dream team but SPECIFICALLY ANTASMA LIKE PLEASE you can't just create a villain so cool but give em little screentime AND let bowser be the final boss (as if BIS didn't already establish character development) .

favorite line

idk his stupid screeches like SKREECHST like psst it's so funny

brOTP

honestly... i'm not sure .

OTP

canonically? none. you fools, you thought i was gonna sa Rosetasma. well yes but i'm going for canon and reality is disappointing lol

nOTP again, antasma/Dreambert or Antasma bowser . like i just don't see it at all going anyway other then rivals to enemies lol (also whatever he and bowser had is toxic af yo y'all i can rant about it for hours but not today )

random headcanon

he skreeches very loudly when he's happy idk i love him

unpopular opinion

(aside from AUs) half of the fandom seem to forget he's geniunely evil and calculating and all. like, idk the fact that most people geniunely act like he's like a sweet lil bby uwu UNIRONICALLY just ..yeah. it's mainly because the game doesn't show us much about him even, like we don't know much AT ALL compared to other villains,(like tbh i doubt he WASN'T gonna backstab bowser, i think he was just deadass using him . it was implied at least twice or thrice in the game. but got mad cuz BOWSER betrayed him first) but like EVEN with that there are few hints that he is a serious threat . like a VERY serious threat . idk had to let that out of my chest

song i associate with them

idk anything voltaire or phantom of the opera cuz- cuz yea

favorite picture of them

his overworld sprite is so tiny i'm sobbing /pos

[thegrinchwhostolechristmas]

Introduction to my Tumblr page??

This feels so awkward. I don't know why..

Okay anyway.

Hi, I'm Alex and this is the first introduction to any social media account I've ever made so sorry if it's not good.

I will just start off by explaining the image.

In the top left corner is what kind of music I like. I didn't want it to fill up too much so what I have on there right now is Mitski, Korn, The Cure, and The Misfits. But besides those four bands, I also like Mindless Self Indulgence, The Cure, System of A Down, The Garden, Creature Feature, Xasthur, My Chemical Romance, Deftones, Alien Sex Fiend, The Naked And The Dead, Aurelio Voltaire, Will Wood, Will Wood and the Tapeworms, Jack Conte, Lemon Demon, Queen, Birds Fear Death, Ghost, Melanie Martinez, Ramones, Pixies, TV Girl, Puzzle, Skinny Puppy, Oingo Boingo, and Soft Cell. Those are most of the Artists I listen to that I like four or more songs from.

Below the picture of music artists I like, there are three games I like to play. Like a Dino!, Nyan Cat: Lost in space, and Pastel Friends. I think I can say Like a Dino! is a music based game, and it almost reminds me of Magic Tiles 3, a game I used to play when I was younger. Nyan Cat also has music but a lot of meowing in it. I like Nyan Cat because of the sound effects and I personally find it a fun game. I also like how you can customize your cat. Pastel Friends is just a basic dress up game. I love dress up games where I get to create little characters. I don't know why, but it probably ties into how I used to be a cringy gacha kid when I was younger, but who the hell knows 🤷 It's fun and I think it's cute. But besides those three games I also like to play Fun Run 3, Geometry Lite, Geometry Dash, SubZero, Doki Doki Literature Club, Baldi's Basics, Custom Cast, Goat Simulator, Minecraft, and Gacha Life 2. Gacha Life 2 is only to dress up and make cute characters again, I promise I do not participate in any Gacha Heat 😞🙏

Below the games there are three movies. Pirates of the Caribbean 1: The Curse of the Black Pearl, Pirates of the Caribbean 2: Dead Man's Chest, and Pirates of the Caribbean 3: At World's End. POTC 3 is my ultimate favorite though. My favorite character is Hector Barbossa and he is just such a good character in my opinion! I do not wanna say too much because I'm afraid I might spoil something, but he owns a monkey named Jack and I remember a specific scene at the end of one of the movies Hector is seen baby talking Jack (not Sparrow).

On the right side of the movies, there is an anime I really liked and have for four years. HunterxHunter!!! I love it so much I have no idea why. Like I hate so many of the characters, like that stupid clown Hisoka, and there's also the bald lemon head looking bald grandpa in the Zoldyck family, but it's not Zeno. But besides that, I find it a nice anime.

On top of HunterxHunter, there's two people I made in Pastel Friends. Me on the left and my girlfriend on the right. I will not say her name for her own sake but she is the best and I'd do anything for her. We were friends for a year before we got into a relationship and she's the most perfect person I've ever met.

On top of my girlfriend and I is Illumi Zoldyck. There is not much to say. I just like him :P

And on top of Illumi, there is the unlabeled flag. I hope its not outdated, I kind of rushed making this whole thing. But I do not have any labels on my gender/sexuality. I am not cis, demi-boy, demi-girl not hetero, bisexual, pansexual, I am just me and prefer the pronouns he/him or they/them. But it is completely cool if you go by any of the sexual orientations/genders I just listed!! 🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍⚧️🏳️‍🌈🌈🌈🏳️‍🌈 bwyafypdh

I think I explained everything on the image, now I will tell you other things

My favorite drink is eggnog, my favorite foods are probably steamed vegetables, my favorite candy is suckers, my favorite dinosaur is the Spinosaurus, my favorite colors are red and sometimes green.

Likes: Candles, things that smell good, writing, reading, poetry, winter, the cold, caffeine, pirates, dinosaurs, language from the 1500's, music, the grinch, lipgloss, socks, cool mugs, sketching, mini dioramas

Dislikes: Being too warm, MY HANDS BEING STICKY, naps, breaking my elbow, cracking my knuckles and feeling pain, mean teachers

I have a basic DNI list

My favorite book is also The Timekeeper by Rob Kidd!

[testure-1988]

Ok, I still can't even believe I talked to Skinny Puppy. It just feels so unreal. We weren't even given much of a chance to even have a conversation, with Ogre still feeling under the weather (which is understandable, he needed his rest. And to see him coughing so much just really hurt me). The staff was being super pushy and nasty too. But I managed to tell the band it was my first time seeing them and Ogre told me "Oh you'll definitely see us". And then as we were leaving, Ogre said "I hope you enjoy the show!" it was so sweet!! I had so much I wanted to say to them but didn't get a chance to. And I felt super awkward and knew that I probably embarrassed myself, but I don't really care now.

So, the show was beyond incredible. I almost got choked up a few times and nearly fell on my ass cause the crowd kept pushing me from behind a lot , but what was REALLY surprising was Matthew Setzer handing me a guitar pick from the stage! And then someone in front of me tried to grab it but he pulled it back and had this expression where he was like "no NO. This is HER pick! NOT YOURS" I couldn't believe that happened. I freaked out.

Then at the after-party, Matthew was there, and he started talking to me. I thanked him for the guitar pick and I said it meant SO much to me. He said he recognized me from Instagram and told me that I was really cool and it was wonderful I'm such a big fan. I told him that the VIP was so brief and I wanted to talk more to the band and he told me it was kind of shitty how impatient the staff was. He couldn't believe it was my first SP show and I told him I had a blast, which he was happy about. Then I told him how Skinny Puppy helps me deal with my mental health issues and he said his dad introduced him to Skinny Puppy and now he's a member. It was so fucking cool!!! Then he just gave me the biggest and warmest hug and I was gushing so hard afterward. Then we all danced to a really great old-school industrial set (Still can't believe the DJs threw in some Controlled Bleeding, Meat Beat Manifesto & Manufacture). It was so surreal dancing to Skinny Puppy with the members of Skinny Puppy. Oh and Dustin hugged me too. :)

And then I met Voltaire!! He was at the bar near the entrance.

And I also met JOLENE SIANA!!! She was the sweetest person too. She filmed me and Char talking about Skinny Puppy and she took so many pictures of us during the show. She also wanted to help me get back into the venue after the staff locked me out.

And I met SO many of my mutuals from here!! It was so fucking amazing just hanging out with everyone and sharing the Skinny Puppy magic. Cause my Puppy/Industrial mutuals are like my family. It was wonderful dancing and just really vibing with y'all. I LOVE YOU!!

[chaotic-history]

14 + 19 + 29 for the history ask game? ✨

Thanks for the ask!! <3

14 - Why are you interested in history?

I really don't know. I used to be really interested as a kid and then fell out of it, and then got interested again via Candide/Voltaire. There's kind of two ways I look at history; one is that I'm really interested in specific individuals; the other is that it's almost like a puzzle in the sense that each event connects to all the moving factors and causes/effects around it and you get to try and figure out how the pieces might go together. So I guess a lot of is it that; being able to find patterns and threads that run through different things.

19 - Favourite historical book?

Favorite book *about* history is Changes In The Land, which is about New England ecology from pre-colonisation through the beginning of the 1800s, mostly focusing on the 1600s and the relations between the Native Americans and the settlers and the different relationships with/views of the environment that they each had. It's really easy to read even if you know jack shit about ecology, while also being very informative and not just surface level. My favorite part (outside the anecdote of William Bradford walking into a deer trap) was the analysis of how the mercantilist/early capitalist views of the settlers led to viewing natural resources primarily as commodities to fetch a profit, as opposed to the Native Americans who tended more to view the value of natural resources strictly in terms of their usefulness, which is a distinction I hadn't really specifically thought about.

Favorite book *from* history is either Lettres Anglaises/Lettres Philosophique or the Dictionnaire Philosophique. They're both comfort books and I just really love how he writes in them; D.P. especially is very train-of-thought as though he's having a conversation with the reader.

29 - Great historical mystery you are interested in?

The Voynich Manuscript. The illustrations are just. so cool and it would be *incredibly* cool if it's some sort of conlang. Also the hypothesis that it could be a fictional book is !!! I want to read whatever medieval fiction includes all the stuff in the illustrations and is written in code. There's no way that wouldn't be the coolest book ever.

[ladystormcrow]

🎶✨when you get this, put 5 songs you actually listen to, then publish. Send this ask to 10 of your favorite followers (positivity is cool)🎶✨

"Nemesis" by Shriekback

2. "The Logical Song" by Supertramp

3. "I'm Dangerous" by The Everlove

4. "Hold Back The River" by James Bay

5. "The Night" by Voltaire

[theworstofallpossibleworlds]

we got @nyancrimew back on the podcast to talk about cyberpunk and hacking in william gibson’s pioneering sci-fi novel NEUROMANCER. episode drops wednesday. link is in the bio; you know what to do

[sunspray-peak]

Ch. 54: I'm Busy

SATURDAY - WINTER 6

“Nobody’s here.” 

There had been a knock at his front door. Many knocks, actually, for many a minute, which Achilles had been determined to ignore until a particularly aggressive one sent his wind chime rattling and Voltaire scurrying under the bed. 

But his irate response seemed to have done the trick. He let out a breath through his nose. Yes, no more knocking, peace at last.

Probably fucking Lewis. Again… 

The mayor had demanded to speak with him the day after the ceremony, pounding his fist first against the door, then multiple windows, but Achilles had blasted the “Lofi Sleep” playlist at a deafening volume and taken a nap instead. Or something close to a nap—he hadn’t actually fallen asleep, despite his exhaustion. No. Sleep, per usual, would not come. Instead, he had lain comatose in bed, seeing nothing, feeling nothing, thinking of nothing for what felt like eternity. 

He was big on these pseudo-naps these days. In fact, with his newfound, knock-less silence, he brushed the ash off the duvet and was about to huddle back under the covers when the door swung open with a violent pop. 

“Hey now—”

Achilles leapt to his feet, brandishing his cigarette as the sudden burst of Winter wind sent a bevy of goosebumps along his arms as it skittered across his bare chest and legs. He hadn’t dressed in days.  

“Achilles, are you smoking? That’s bad for you, you know.” 

Seeing the face of the newcomer, however, Achilles only collapsed back onto his bed, legs spread and knees up, his left hand still holding the cigarette as wisps of smoke flowed towards the open door. “Oh is it? But it makes me look so cool…” 

Alex knocked the butt from his hands to the ground, ignoring Achilles’ sour cry of alarm (“Burning my house down is gonna be real bad for you, bitch—”). 

“You haven’t been answering your phone.”

Achilles turned onto his side, determined to avoid Alex’s likely pitying gaze, and eyed the dimming embers on his crumb-laden floor. “Hmm. It’s probably dead.” 

“You have a charger, don’t you? You weren’t responding to anything, everyone’s been worried. Man, we weren’t sure if you were even alive.”

“Worry not. I lay before your gaze indeed alive.” 

“Yeah, I can see that.” 

“Fantastic. So be sure to pass that on to the others for me.” Achilles flopped back onto his back and closed his eyes, but after a minute went by, he found he could still feel Alex’s presence in the room. “Why are you still in my house?” 

“Oh.” Self-righteous bravado gone, Alex glanced at his feet, tucking a folder nervously under his arm. “Well… I don’t know, I’ve been wanting to check on you. And, well… it’s Saturday.” 

“Yoba’s day of rest.” Achilles crossed himself—left shoulder, heart, top of the head, right chest, right shoulder. “Speaking of which, I would also like to rest—” 

“Is this… a bad time, then?” 

“For you to break into my home? Yes. Why don’t you try again next week, might be better— oh.  Oh. Fuck.” 

You fucking idiot. 

“It’s ok—”

What’s the point of a planner if you don’t—

“Fuck.” Achilles scrambled up to sit, now suddenly hyper aware of his near-nudity, and grabbed the corner of his dingy, slightly stained bedsheet to lay over his lap. He rubbed his dry, crusty eyes, buried his face in his hands. “Shit—”

“It’s okay if you’re… busy. Things come up—”

“No—god dammit, Alex, stop being polite, do I look like I’m goddamn busy?” Achilles ran a hand through his greasy hair and glanced at the mess of his bedroom. “No, I was just… well. I was just going to… clean… today….” 

A likely story. And one Alex easily saw through, but he was gracious enough to only nod. Not a complete lie, though, right? Achilles had been meaning to get around to it… 

“Would you like my help? I like cleaning.” 

Achilles peaked up from between his fingers. Now there was an idea… Alex’s room had always been meticulously neat, though Achilles had always chalked it up to Evelyn’s interference. Hmm. Perhaps that had been an unfair judgement. 

But his eyes lingered on the rather impressive tower of barely-eaten takeout stacked on his desk. Clothes scattered all over the floor amidst ash and cat hair. Water bottles arranged like bowling pins by crusty socks peaking out of the closet. A $425 face serum spilling into the bathroom sink alongside globs of toothpaste. 

His cheeks began to burn. Embarrassing. No, the less time Alex spent here the better.

“No, it’s fine, I’ll get it done. I’m supposed to be helping you, aren’t I, we can just move to the living room…” 

Or not—fuck, he still hadn’t cleaned up that shattered vase from days before… perhaps they could move to the porch… oh, but it was starting to get cold… 

“Well, consider it a fair exchange, then.” Alex offered the folder he’d been carrying to Achilles, who only threw it on his bed without a second glance. “You help me, I help you. Come on.” He gave a jerky nod up at Achilles’ obvious hesitation. “It’ll make me feel less guilty about all your free labor.” 

Alex was giving him a way out with this, Achilles knew it. Letting him preserve the very last remnants of his dignity with this whole “fair exchange”…

His shoulders sagged. He’d be stupid not to take the offer. He had never been the most organized person, but he detested clutter and dirt, detested this stifling hovel of a home, but he just hadn’t had the energy…

Achilles ran his hand again through his hair before standing slowly. 

“Right… let me just… is it all right if I shower first…” Man, he hadn’t showered since the day of the ceremony… probably smelled like cigarette smoke and grease and who knew what else… 

“Sure!” 

“Right. Thanks…” 

*****

Perhaps if he tried hard enough, he could drown himself in the shower. Maybe plug the drain with a towel. He wondered how high he could get the water before it leaked through the shower door. 

Of course, it’d be easier to drown in the bathtub, but he didn’t fancy leaving the comforting confines of the 90 degree water ricocheting off his shoulders at the highest pressure setting possible. 

Not that he actually wanted to drown himself, anyway—he just wanted to be somewhere far, far away. Somewhere quiet and safe where he could be free from everyone’s worry and everyone’s pity and everyone’s judgement, somewhere he could be free from himself and his own thoughts. 

So he didn’t think. Did nothing but close his eyes and drown those thoughts in the rhythm of the rain as he slumped against the slick, tile walls. 

****

Achilles stepped out from the bathroom after nearly an hour, dressed in a fresh pair of sweatpants and a hoodie. The fabric was flimsy and cool against his newly clean skin. He felt… vulnerable. But at least he smelled like a minty lavender bush now, or however the fuck lavender grew… trees? Shane would probably know… 

A small shiver ran through his body as he returned to a transformed bedroom. 

Well, at least one of them had been efficient with their time.

Alex had thrown all the windows open, the hardwood floors now soaking in their first rays of sunlight in days, likely to allow the Winter breeze to blow out any lingering smells of smoke and rotting salads and soiled cat litter. The takeout boxes had been thrown out, the ashtray by his bed emptied, and both desk and nightstand were still gleaming from what must’ve been a thorough wipe down. Achilles’ nostrils stung with the faintest hint of lemon disinfectant. 

His bed had been stripped of its sheets and covers and pillowcases, all now no doubt tumbling around in the washing machine at the back of the house. And likely alongside the crusty socks and hopefully, with Yoba’s grace, less crusty boxers that were no longer littering the bedroom floor…

The thought of Alex handling his dirty underwear nearly sent him back to the tub to really drown himself, but he instead channeled his embarrassment into a curt assessment of Alex’s admittedly admirable work, sharply nodding towards a small pile of clothes that had been left on the floor. 

“You can’t put that in the washing machine. It’s wool.” 

 Alex popped his head in from the living room, a broom in his hands, and glanced at the sweater Achilles was toeing with his foot. “Oh, don’t worry! I checked the tags. That’s the dry clean pile.”

“Ah. Right.”

Obviously… 

Unsatisfied with Alex’s jovial tone, Achilles stalked into the living room only to be confronted by further evidence of Alex’s productivity. 

The broken vase was gone, the moldy flowers tossed, replaced by the crocus the elementary school kids had gifted him. Stains had been wiped from the coffee table, crinkled papers neatly stacked atop it. The rug had been vacuumed, and Voltaire’s litter box smelled fresher than it had all week. The small painting of two root vegetables even looked a little straighter hanging from its place on the wall. The throw pillows had been freshly fluffed. Achilles swiped the rim of his television—hell, had Alex even dusted?

Fuck. 

What Achilles had failed to achieve in the past week had taken Alex scarcely an hour, and the realization further emboldened the bitter seed in his stomach. 

“Found the cleaning supplies all right, I see? No problem, just feel free to just dig around my house…” Ah, so you are determined to be nasty. “How’d you break in, anyway?” 

“Oh, I figured you’d keep a key somewhere on the property. Figured you’d hide it with the gnome.” 

Alex’s lopsided grin only served to irk Achilles more, and he retaliated in a nasally, mocking voice, “‘Figured you’d hide it with the gnome.’”

Fuck, shut up you asshole. What are you, six years old?

But Alex stubbornly took no notice, shrugging off the comment and returned to sweeping the kitchen floor. “Gotta say, that gnome doesn’t look very trustworthy to me, though. Maybe hide it with the snail instead, now that’s a guy I’d trust with my life. ” 

Alex’s composure was aggravating, and despite his mind's better half's protests, Achilles couldn’t help but continue to bait him. “Just went and poked around the farm, too, huh? No one taught you better manners than that?” 

But again. Alex only calmly set the broom against the wall before retrieving the folder he had brought with him from the coffee table. “Just trying to help.” 

Remorse rushed Achilles’ veins—but he couldn’t bring himself to apologize. It was frustrating, goddamn infuriating. Why couldn’t Alex just fight back? Yell or insult or even just swear, something, anything, to prove to Achilles that other people were just as bad and rotten and mean and fucked in the head as he was. 

But no. Alex only padded towards him, hand holding the folder outstretched, and said brightly, 

“So I took a stab at all the sample interview questions you gave me last season. I thought maybe you could read over them first—”

“Well, you do actually have to talk during an interview, Alex, believe it or not.” Achilles feigned a yawn, perhaps as a means to avoid eye contact. “Color me surprised at the effort, really, reading and writing aren’t usually your thing are they—”

And finally—finally—Alex’s face fell. But rather than relief, Achilles was immediately seized with overwhelming regret and shame, looking quickly away as Alex softly said, “You don’t have to be mean, Ash.” 

Yoba, what’s wrong with you? Pathetic. You deserve to feel like shit, it’s no wonder they pity you —

But as he brought himself to meet Alex’s gaze, he found that it wasn’t pity that lined the man’s face. Not even anger. Only concern.

“We don’t have to do this. Look, let me just finish up here, and I’ll get out of your hair—”

“No—”

“I shouldn’t have come. I’m sorry, it was selfish, I don’t know what I was thinking, you’ve had a rough couple of weeks, and I should’ve checked in earlier, I wasn’t sure if maybe you wanted space and then here I come barging in anyway—”

“Alex, stop—”

“You’ve had a lot—”

“Alex. God. Stop.” Achilles swiped the folder from Alex’s hands and made for the living room where he collapsed onto the sofa. He buried his head in his hands, struggled to staunch the tears threatening to break loose. Don’t fucking cry. “Don’t apologize. I’m sorry. I’m being an ass.” 

“You’ve had a lot—” 

“It’s not a good excuse.” 

“No, yeah, I guess it’s not…” He felt Alex take a seat next to him. “But you’re not using it as an excuse. Not really. Just an... I dunno. An explanation. We don’t have to do this, I really shouldn’t have asked—” 

“I want to.” And in saying those three words, Achilles found that he did. 

“You promise? It’s ok if you don’t, I understand. Really. Don’t force yourself, it’s just a job interview, I can figure it out—” 

“I want to.” 

*****

As Alex cleaned the kitchen (Achilles had insisted he could do it later, but Alex had only responded with, “Oh don’t worry, I actually really enjoy washing dishes!”), Achilles poured over the packet of pages, squinting through his glasses (he hadn’t bothered with contacts the past few days). 

Yoba, why’d he given Alex so many sample questions… 

He had been a bit surprised, and then abashed at feeling surprised. Like a good little pupil, Alex had written rather detailed, thorough responses for each and every one. Each answer perhaps a little too blatantly followed the “STAR Method” for interviewing that Achilles had walked him through at the end of Fall, but, Achilles had to admit, too much was better than too little. 

Probably could’ve bulleted all this, Achilles thought wryly as he tapped his chin with his favorite purple pen in his hand. He had had a bit of trouble concentrating at the beginning, but after half an hour had found that the simple, straightforward task had managed to lift him slightly from whatever hot mess he’d been marinating in these past few days. He hadn’t even craved a cigarette (which was lucky, because Alex had thrown them all out). 

“Good job,” he finally declared, setting his pen down.  

Alex, who had been carrying dry bedsheets back to the bedroom, jumped at the clatter. “Oh. You don’t have to be nice.” 

“Alexander… I think we both know me well enough that I’m not just ‘being nice.’” 

“Yeah, ya got me there.” 

“Come here, sit down.” 

They went through each question one by one. Achilles could be merciless, but Alex, with the open mindedness good natured folks like himself tended to have for quality constructive feedback,  nodded along, asking questions and spitballing new potential stories to tell. 

“I think you can actually focus on highlighting some softer traits if asked, like your personality— especially for this role. You’re personable. Patient. Empathetic. Hmm… attentive? Think of how valuable—”

But Alex was laughing, and Achilles, still rather deep in “work mode,” glanced up from his notes tersely. “What? What’s so funny?” 

“No, don’t stop. Keep going.” 

“What? Oh…” Achilles allowed himself a single dry chuckle. “Well, I mean, it’s the truth. And looking at the job description, you’ll be working with people a lot and, well, you’re good at that. Emphasize it. You’re a mediator, you’re charismatic. People are naturally inclined to like you—” 

Alex laughed again, this time nudging Achilles’ shoulder. “Do you like me, Achilles?” 

Oh? 

Was Alex… flirting with him?

Doesn’t matter, there’s business to attend to. 

Achilles sighed and pinched his twitching nose. 

“I think most people like you, Alex, that’s the point I’m trying to make—I mean, don’t say it like that in your interview, of course, but you can illustrate it through your stories. Talk about your class retention rates, your evals—”

“It just seems so… I don’t know. Arrogant.”

“I’ve already told you this, if there’s ever a time to brag it’s during an interview.”  

“What words do you normally use when they ask?” 

Achilles thought back to his last interview. Just last season, during his Shadow King-induced job application phase. Fuck, speaking of which, he owed both offers a response… double fuck, just another thing to stress about… 

But not now. This was Alex’s time.

He set aside the looming headache. 

Great at compartmentalizing—now there’s a trait to describe yourself… 

“Hmm. Results-oriented? Methodical. Adaptable. Enterprising? But it’s a very different sort of job…” 

“You use fancy words.” 

“Yeah? What would you say?” 

“For you? I don’t know. Ambitious? Is that a fancy enough word?”

“Fair enough.” 

Alex flipped through the pages on the coffee table, singling out one that Achilles had printed for him previously, and glanced through the list of 200+ adjectives. 

“Intelligent. Four syllables, though it doesn’t feel that fancy.” 

Achilles’ nose wrinkled as he leaned over to look over the list. The top of his head brushed Alex’s chin as he rested his forearm on Alex’s thigh. “Gross—”

“Kind. Good.” 

“I was a real fucking asshole to you like two hours ago—”

“Well, I didn’t say you were nice. And far, far from perfect.” Alex ran his finger down the third column of words, slowly reciting them aloud. “Proactive. Resilient. Responsible. Self-motivated. Thoughtful.”

“Well now you’re making me sound like a straight-laced prick.” 

“No! I don’t mean it like that, I admire you a lot, man. Don’t go back to Hyacinthia, please—” 

It’d be hard to hide his blush in the afternoon sun streaming through, so he didn’t bother. Instead, Achilles wrenched the list from Alex’s hands and tossed it to the floor. 

“All right, all right, you can stop kissing my ass, there’s no need. Come on now, let’s focus. Next question…” 

*****

After running though all of Alex’s written responses, the two had spent another hour and a half practicing. Rehearsing, really, talking out his answers. As per his own words, Achilles was, if nothing else, methodical, and now that he was fueled by a newfound purpose (however low stakes and short term), he was comprehensive in his feedback. Only after Achilles declared that he was 100% satisfied did they move on to the next question. 

“I know this is probably all so silly to you,” Alex said as Achilles turned to a fresh page of notes. “All this work for a dinky job like this. Nothing like what you’re used to—” 

“Be quiet. So tell me, Alexander, what is your greatest professional achievement?” 

At half past 3—they had worked straight through lunch, though to be fair Achilles hadn’t felt hungry for quite a few days now—Achilles finally clasped his hands together and deemed Alex ready. 

“You got this in the bag, man,” he said amidst Alex’s profuse thanks as the latter gathered his now heavily marked papers. “It’ll be great.” 

“Fingers crossed…” 

There was a soft buzz. Alex reached into his pocket and glanced at his phone, but rather than answer the call, he looked up at Achilles. 

“Oh, hey, um, Haley’s having an afternoon tea party in a bit, it’s this thing she does in the Winter… you want to come? You were probably invited, if you just checked your dang mail. Emily will be there. Maybe Penny and Maru…” 

Lord, that sounded exhausting. Achilles didn’t bother to hide the twitch in his nose as he leaned back into his couch, and Alex, in his usual ability to read Achilles’ mind, quickly added, “Yeah, it can be a lot… uh, we can also just hang out. Here.” 

Oh? 

But despite the flare that had suddenly burst up his spine, Achilles shook his head. “No. I don’t want to keep you, you go ahead—” 

“No it’s okay! She has these all the time, I can tell her I’m busy, and it’s not like I don’t see her pretty much every day anyway… but only if you want, I mean, unless you’d rather chill alone, I totally understand—wow, okay, good job Alex—sorry, I didn’t mean to invite myself over—”

“You’re fine, Al…”

“But I’d be down to just… watch TV. If you want. Just us two.”

Oh. 

Achilles fingers curled into the edge of the sofa. “Oh. Sure. Yes. You’re welcome to stay if you want, that’d be… nice.” 

Beaming, Alex stuffed his phone back in his pocket and grabbed one of the freshly-fluffed throw pillows and fell back into the sofa just as Achilles stood and tossed him the remote. 

“Pick whatever, I’ve got pretty much every channel and every streaming service. I can… make us some nachos… or something…” He began to scurry for the kitchen, not daring to believe what was happening—though you’ve hung out numerous times before alone together, why would this be any different—just as Alex called after him. 

“I checked out your fridge while cleaning, and buddy, let me tell you, you ain’t got nothing for nachos.” 

*****

Partway through the second hour, Alex had fallen asleep on his shoulder. The weight of his head and the warmth of his arm pressed against Achilles’ was comforting. He could count the freckles on Alex’s nose from here, his eyelashes. Smell the usual citrus scent. Had he always used that, or had that only come after working at Orange Grove, Achilles idly wondered. 

Alex slept with the ghost of a grin on his lips, not even the slightest crinkle in his brow. So untroubled. So at peace.

How? 

His arms—Yoba, those arms—were still wrapped tightly around the throw pillow, and Achilles couldn’t help but wonder what it’d be like for those arms to be wrapped around him instead. 

For the first time, he thought back to Spirit’s Eve. To Alex’s kiss and his shy smiles and the repeated touch of his hand around his arm… he wanted that again. He wanted all of it again. And for once, he allowed himself to imagine a world where he could have it all. The logical part of him knew it was silly, fantasizing over someone he’d long accepted would always be just a friend. 

But that wasn’t quite right, was it? That wasn’t the truth of it, he hadn’t accepted shit. With a small jolt in his stomach, his mind caught up to his heart, and he realized. 

Oh no. 

You’re in love again, pal. 

Although was “again” really the right word? Looking back, he had never fallen out of it, as much as he’d try to persuade himself these past few seasons that he’d gotten “over” his feelings—like a buoy in the ocean, he had been sent adrift, lost long enough in the vastness of his longing to forget he was even in the middle of it. But he’d never truly escaped the magnetizing draw. Had just bobbed in and out with the current. And now he was sinking deeper and deeper. 

Stop. 

He didn’t need this. He had a million other things that he needed to take care of… 

Alex stirred slightly, his left leg bumping Achilles’ crossed knee, his hand slipping down the pillow to Achilles’ thigh. 

A restless flush crept over him; he unconsciously shifted his weight, and with a small start, Alex woke.

“Eh?” 

“Ah. He has awoken.”

“Mmm, sorry,” Alex raised a hand to rub his eyes, stretching his other arm as he burrowed his head deeper in to Achilles' shoulder with a groan and near-jabbed him up the nose (whether purposeful or accidental, Achilles wasn't sure). “Must’ve fallen asleep…” 

“Well, that settles the debate then.” Achilles lightly shoved a mid-yawn Alex towards the other end of the couch. “House Of the Phoenix is a better show than Crowns of Power.” 

“Hey, hey now, I didn’t say that—”

“You didn’t have to, you fell asleep ten minutes into the second episode—”

“Hey, maybe I was tired from cleaning your dang house, ever thoueght of that—“ 

“Oooh, impressive stamina right there for a professional athlete like yourself—”

Alex laughed, one hand casually reaching for Achilles’ waving wrist. The deliberateness of the gesture sent a burst of static up his arm. “Knock on wood. But hey. Hopefully soon, right! If this interview goes well…” 

“It will.” 

Alex responded to Achilles’ firm declaration with a shy, appreciative smile. “I’ve, uh… still found time to swim. In the pool, not the sea, mind you, don’t worry, it’s too cold now… but you know, my times aren’t bad. They’re actually… pretty good. And I think, if I can get this job, with the extra time and stuff I could… you know. Really have a go at it again.” Alex’s eyes were downcast, but his small smile held. “I told my grandparents about it.” 

“Oh really? Why? I thought they didn’t approve.” 

“Yeah, well, I don’t like keeping secrets from them, it was weighing on me… anyways, they don’t really not approve, either. They’re just worried, you know. Makes sense, pro sports is, well… not easy. But since I’m going for the promotion it sort of all balances out in their eyes… it’d just be cool, you know? To do it again…” He bounced to his feet and stretched again, averting Achilles' gaze as he bent down to touch his toes and pick up a stray popcorn kernel. “Speaking of my grandparents, though, I should get back, gotta make dinner. Do you wanna join?” 

I’d join you anywhere. 

But Achilles found he was suddenly exhausted. A real rollercoaster of a day…

“Nah. I’ll sit this one out. But thanks.”

“Oh, I should be thanking you, and again, I’m so sorry—”

“No, really, Alex. Thank you.” For checking in. For cleaning my house when I couldn’t. For allowing me a semblance of dignity. For giving me space. For dealing with my asshole-ery. For being there. “You didn’t have to do any of this.”

“Oh, come on.” Alex dusted cat hair off his sweatpants (Voltaire had joined them halfway through episode one). “I’d do anything for you, Achilles. You’re my best friend.”

Unabashed, unashamed. Perhaps his matter of fact tone should’ve disappointed Achilles. Alex surely wouldn’t be speaking so casually if this were romantic, right? But even still, tonight the words glowed as they warmed his heart. 

He walked Alex to the door, but before heading out, the man paused, shoved his hands into his pockets. “Hey, I um…” 

It was clear from the lack of eye contact Alex had been waiting—probably for Achilles to be in a better mood—to bring whatever this was up. His heart began to beat faster—he could feel the blood rushing in his ears, the tingle in his cheeks as he watched Alex bite his lip. 

“Earlier, when I was, um, what’d you call it? Poking around your house?” 

Achilles gave only a guilty snort in response. 

“I came across some, um, pages you wrote. In the living room. Couldn’t help but read a little bit. Sorry.”

Oh. 

“It’s good! I liked it a lot. And I started Apparition, too, on the e-reader you gave me. I mean, it’s no Henry Spector, but I have the tastes of a fifth grader so… anyway, I’m enjoying it.” 

“Oh. Right.” 

“Um, just… wanted to let you know, I guess… but anyway. I’ll see you Monday?” 

“Ah. Maybe. I’ll keep you updated.”

“Sounds good!” 

“Good luck, Al.” Achilles’ hand was on the door, ready to shut it behind Alex’s retreating back, when his remaining seeds of guilt seized him and he called, “And I’m sorry. For being a… I don’t know. A little bitch. Big bitch, really… The biggest. There’s no good excuse for it. I shouldn’t have said what I did, and you were being… good to me.” As you always are. 

“I understand, Ash. It’s hard.” There was a knowing look on Alex’s face as he paused, hands in his pockets, on the porch steps. “But I appreciate it.”  

*****

It was remarkable how much lighter he felt.

Whether it was due to Alex’s presence, Alex’s forgiveness, the welcome distraction of interview prep, the fact that his house was now worthy of an East Nettle magazine spread, or perhaps (and most likely) a combination of the four, he didn’t care. For the first time in days, he felt… not great. Not good. But maybe… okay. 

Even so, Achilles, anal as he was, couldn’t help but inspect Alex’s handiwork, running a finger along the kitchen countertops and straightening the dishcloth before throwing a frozen pizza into the oven. 

He knew the living room was up to scratch. But after Alex’s parting words, he paused to glance at the handful of pages Alex had neatly stacked that had escaped the fiery death of their brethren three nights ago. A sad death it was—the paper had been wet, and thus hadn’t burned properly. Alex must’ve seen their half-charred remains in the fireplace. The pitiful sight likely had been what had pushed him to say what he had on his way out the door. 

Achilles glanced back at the kitchen. Neither of them had mentioned the typewriter, which Alex, despite all his organizing, had left in its place still on the kitchen table. 

He retreated to the bedroom, breathed in the smell of his lavender laundry detergent and wished it were oranges instead. His bed was made. Voltaire had already set up camp right in the middle of the clean comforter.

Alex had placed his messenger bag on the hook behind his door—well, nobody was perfect. Achilles went to move it to its proper place on the back of his desk chair, when something fell out from the front pocket with a thud. A thick yellow envelope. 

Weird. Where’d you come from.

But no—he remembered now. Alex’s birthday gift, the one he wasn’t supposed to open until later. Yoba, Spirit’s Eve had seemed like a lifetime ago. He tore back the flap and withdrew the sheet of paper conveniently labeled “This one first!”. 

Dear Achilles, 

Please don’t get mad. 

I know my opinion doesn’t mean much to you. Understandable since I don’t read ha. 

But here are some thouhgts from some people who do. 

Happy birthday you old fart. 

Your freind friend, 

Alex 

His interest now piqued, Achilles gently refolded the letter and set it aside before dumping the remaining contents out onto the floor. 

Rectangular scraps of paper. Perhaps three dozen of them of varying sizes, neatly cut. 

Oh. 

He spread the reviews—for that’s what they were, the font, the spacing, the profile pictures and usernames; Achilles immediately recognized where they had come from—out neatly along the floor in a 6x6 grid. 

OK so my friend basically forced me at gunpoint to read this and uhhhhh oh my GOD where was this when I was in elementary school????? ??? I LOVE IT!!!!!!! 

I’m a third grade teachers and my students absolutely love Henry Spector—highly recommend for grades second through fourth. Wonderful entryway into the horror genre. Not too scary for young readers, but with just enough thrills to keep students on their toes. Fantastic diverse cast of characters…  

A+ Story

A+ Writing

A+ Characters

SO FUNNY 

the gays won everybodyyy. s/o to achilles (pronounced uh-sheel, y’all) desrosiers, he’s a real one. more lgbt+ protags pls & ty. 

~ Henry Spector inspired playlist ~ 

I looooooove Henry and Silas and Jane but Theo is the best!!! 

Quick, easy read. Obviously for kids, but I’m in middle school and I still really liked the series (my favorite is Henry Spector and the Ghoul in School, thats book 3, but their all good). I told all my friends about it and they liked it, too. Really fun. 

Goodstory community reviews. Alex must’ve looked them up, picked out some 5 star ones, printed them out. 

And for the third time that week, Achilles couldn’t help but cry. 

Must be a record.  

[crayonurchin]

I did one party today for the coolest fucking family.

We offer a 'rock' party, which is just classic rock songs, a few rock remixes of kids songs, inflatable guitars and a few 'rock' games like 'head banging contest' or 'air guitar musical statues'

Some kids who get this party just wanna be cool... but still have a kiddie party

Some kids take it very, very seriously

This was a serious party

6 year old kiddo requested slipknot, linken park, mother fucking VOLTAIRE and Metallica. Parents and older sibling joined in 100%. Birthday cake was a super Mario cake. Kid wanted to do a full air guitar solo to Smells Like Teen Spirit. He totally got to.

SECOND AWESOME PART

older sibling and her friend chatted with me during lunch break. Both 12. They were both so, so excited to talk about Pride with me, showing me their Lesbian and Bisexual flags respectively, and excitedly telling their trans friends were going to come this year too.

Just... like I know it's an old thing to say but I'm so utterly happy these kids can just- do this. Be young, be proud and happy of who they are, be excited to celebrate it. Friend asked me to follow her TikTok but that's not appropriate since I'm on the job, so she just showed me a bunch before we started the games again, all of her and her friends just jumping and dancing with their respective flags.

Good people are having good kids and we all have a good time rocking out to metal remixes of This Is Halloween

-

Also there was a pub near the venue called The Cock Inn and I absolutely lost in when I drove past that

[mishkakagehishka]

hihi! who are some of your favourite french authors/poets? this is for a school project but feel free to ignore if you want! i already have victor hugo in the list, but if you have any information you'd like to add on him id appreciate it! hope you have a good day~

Hmm! I'm actually not too well-versed in French literature. Even though they did a lotta cool shit, I never really took to reading them that much.

Charles Baudelaire, though. He will always be number 1 in my heart. His poetry invented symbolism and beauty in the grotesque (literally). Balzac had some good ideas, but, similarly to Hugo, I have no idea what French prose authors were on in the 19th century, but I just can't make myself read 20 pages of a street being described (<- literally what happens in Le Père Goriot). That said, I do have Splendeurs et misères des courtisanes and Notre-Dame de Paris on my read list, because like. It's worth it. It's a slog, but it's worth it.

Jules Verne, too. I condemned Balzac for his twenty fucking pages of street description, but Verne's prose is everything to me. It's a slog. It's a fucking slog. But i have been doing my damn best to read L'île mysterieuse since I was in middle school, bc I want to read it despite the fact that Verne is also a 19th century French novelist and Jesus Christ he can describe. At least his descriptions tend to stick to describing technology and mechanisms which actually has a function, though. My mom's warm recommendation is also Un capitaine de quinze ans, but I haven't started reading it yet myself.

If it's for a school project, you can use Jules Verne as a fun fact, too, a lot of his novels are considered science fiction, but a lot of them feature stuff that was later invented and stuff that's now feasible. But it's still super cool to read, even tho "around the world in 80 days" isn't a feat anymore, it's fun :)

And since it's a project, i'm gonna be nice and give you some extra names :> : François Rabelais (renaissance lit rep. I don't even know how to summarise Gargantua and Pantagruel, but we love grotesque satire), Molière (wrote satirical comedies - an icon), Voltaire (Candide actually kinda smacks tho I never finished it) and Albert Camus (Stranger is a masterpiece of absurdist literature, but Mersault should not have been condemned for being unemotional, free my man)

[405blazeitt]

ohohohohoho i hadn't seen the "your artist messages" feature on spotify. apparently i'm a top listener to voltaire, so that's cool. i've got goth cred without being goth. fox stevenson's message is very nice. i have no clue what haloo helsinki! is saying beyond kiitos and rakas, but that's how i feel toward them so that works, i think. bård and vegard worry for humanity.

[mrcookiesir]

Cookie's really cool about me

🎵: Almost Human by Aurelio Voltaire

☆ hi I'm Cookie. I'm a OC and muti-fandom artist, and semi-roleplayer. I am always tired, and I have a discord made for friends and mutuals:D:

○ I go by He/they/it/ve/ver pronouns, main persona who goes by the same name also goes by he/they

♡ Transmasc, ace, demiromantic creature

□ I have a lot of kins: (now in color!)

Tadano Hitohito (Komi can't communicate)

Basil (OMORI)

Sunny (OMORI)

Mari (OMORI)

Kel (OMORI)

Count Bleck (Super Paper Mario)

Olivia (Paper Mario: the origami king)

Yellow (Pokèmon Adventures)

Reimu Hakurei (Touhou)

Wall-E (WALL-E)

Kagamine Rin & Len (Vocaloid)

Boushi Ringo (UTAU)

Pumpkin king (UTAU)

Sayaka Miki (Madoka Magica)

Madoka Kaname (Madoka Magica)

□ comfort characters:

Dr. Bones Cookie (Cookie run)

TBH/autism creature

Literally any Hanna-Barbera characters

The Demon gang (my demonic furries, especially SoulTaker)

Inspector Gadget (Inspector Gadget)

Mimikyu (Pokèmon)

Boushi Ringo (UTAU)

Grimlock (Transformers)

◇ Persona lore is @chaosflavoredcookies and oc randomness is @the-oc-partytime

♧ I has school and low energy😀, so I won't be that active, but I'll try

♤ if i mess something up or get something wrong, plz tell me!!!

DNI/DO NOT INTERACT IF YOU ARE THE FOLLOWING:

Pedophiles/MAPs

Proshippers

Pro-life

NSFW blogs

Vore.

Dream stans

homophobic

Transphobic/TERFs