#i'm so out of practice writing the faves im so sorry guys i hope this one's not too ooc/disappointing. i tried.

[eurydicees]

me sitting by you, sitting without seeing me 

summary: when tamaki gets to japan, this is his first mistake: greeting his father. prompt: music recs, any human friend (album), for @selkiecoded pairings: tamaki suoh/kyoya ootori words: 1877 warnings: homophobia, mentions of canon-typical abuse and racism notes: a mix of manga and anime canon is used! i mostly used inspiration from the song "i'm not where you are" off of this album. ty for the rec i really enjoyed it!!

When Tamaki gets to Japan, this is his first mistake: greeting his father. 

It’s a stupid mistake. He knows it’s a stupid mistake. He knows better than to say what he did. He didn’t use the correct level of formality when he spoke to his father in Japanese, and it got him first a slightly disapproving frown from his father and then, from his grandmother, a scoff and a dismissal. She waves her hand at him and says, “You’ll know better than to address me, at least, so informally, I expect.” 

The shame colors his cheeks, heats up his insides, sending him spiraling back to France. He’s been in Japan and with his family for five minutes and already fucked up. He takes a deep breath and says, “Yes, Grandmother. It’s good to see you,” as formally as he remembers how, and then bows. 

She scoffs again, and then turns around and walks away. This is the first of many times that he will disappoint her. Or, this is just the latest of times in the string of times he’s disappointed her just by virtue of being born. Which wasn’t his fault, but it’s hard to feel like it isn’t his problem. 

Tamaki is led to his room in the second Suoh mansion, where he unpacks his few things, sets his photo of his mother on a shelf, and then lies down in the bed and stares up at the ceiling. He doesn’t hate Japan. He doesn’t. It’s just that he doesn’t fit. 

This is not the last time he will feel like this. The next time is when he goes to dinner, and he greets the maid on his way to the dining room in search of the meal. He just says hello, and he bows, because he’s pretty sure that’s what you’re supposed to do when you meet people for the first time, and she stutters something that sounds like “Oh, oh, oh, oh,” and then she stumbles around a corner and turns away. 

It’s a little strange, but maybe she was just nervous meeting someone new, and so he doesn’t think much of it until he greets the cook who serves him and he does the same thing. It’s not until he talks to the head of the servants that he’s finally told that that’s just not how things work around here. The servants are not his friends. They are to be treated with respect, but they aren’t there to talk to him or spend time around him. 

Oh, is all that he can think. He doesn’t know how he feels about that. On one hand, he knows that that’s the nature of their job and of his position. On the other hand, he believes every human being deserves a hello and a good morning and a note of respect in his voice. 

But he’ll go with this for now. He’s desperate to be what he’s expected to be. He’s been set adrift in Japan and he’s clinging to every lifeline he can grasp at; he’s clinging tight to the things he knows to be true and the things he’s told he’s wrong about. The problem is just that it seems that he’s wrong about everything. 

As he comes to understand the world and culture and language and customs a little better, it becomes quickly apparent that his father hasn’t told the truth about everything. In all their conversations about Japan, there are so many things he hadn’t mentioned and even more things that he said that are outright untrue. The fact that his father lied to him about so many things doesn’t sit well in his stomach. But he’s also not brave enough to confront him about it, to ask why he would do that to him, to wonder aloud if he meant so little as to lie about his own heritage, and so he just lives with his new and corrected knowledge.

It’s Kyoya, really, who tells him the truth. Kyoya, who never fails to tell him when he’s wrong. Kyoya, who doesn’t hold back anymore. Kyoya, who reminds him to sleep before dreaming but then builds his dreams anyways.

But even with Kyoya, there’s a disconnect that bothers Tamaki. There’s a kind of broken piece between them: if they were each one half of a puzzle, there would be a single piece in the middle that had fallen by the wayside, never to be found again. There’s a kind of crack in the floor they stand on that represents a canyon that he cannot cross, but that he must leap over before he fully understands what it means to live in Japan, to be Japanese, to be half, to be everything that he is and wants to be and is supposed to be. 

“I could be a preschool teacher,” he tells Kyoya once. 

“As if your father would let that happen,” Kyoya replied. 

He’s right, he’s always right, but it’s still a wake up call that Tamaki didn’t really want. He knows that there are things expected of him. He knows that who he is now is not enough for anyone—for his family. 

He knows that who he will be is a shape molded years upon years ago, when it became clear he was the only heir and the weight of the Suoh family was put on his shoulders. Or, when it became clear he was the only heir and the weight of being good enough to call himself Suoh was made into a quest, an obstacle, a fight to the death. 

It’s strange. He loves who he is. He wants to love who he will be. He doesn’t know how. 

He also doesn’t know how to get there—to the future. He doesn’t know how to become what he needs to be. There are too many things in his childlike wonder that Tamaki doesn’t want to let go of. Love is a tool, a weapon, a shield, and he wields it strong and careful with both hands. 

Love is also unwelcome. This is something he learns early on in his life in Japan. 

This is something he learns when his grandmother calls him a disgraceful bastard. This is something he learns when a girl at school gives him a strange look and then calls him a halfer; just a brief, throwaway comment to her, but to Tamaki it is a prick of a needle popping his heart. This is also something he learns later, when he kisses Kyoya, and he gets caught. 

They are seventeen. They are sitting in Music Room 3, and everyone is supposed to be gone for the day. They were supposed to be alone for hours, talking about the club and life and the future and all of the things that they speak about when no one else is there to listen. 

But Haruhi forgot her phone—she’s ridiculously lax about the care and upkeep of the thing, mostly because she didn’t want it in the first place—and she had come back for it. She had hesitated at the door when she saw how close they were sitting to each other. Maybe she was curious. Maybe something in her gut just told her to stop, to stand at a crack in the door that neither had noticed, and wait. 

Either way, she stands there and watches as Tamaki puts his hand to Kyoya’s cheek and presses a tender kiss to his lips and then pulls away with a smile. Kyoya has that light pink color at his cheeks that he gets when they kiss, something Tamaki has teased him to no end about, and he looks so eiderdown-soft and rose-red-in-love that Tamaki kisses him again. 

They were supposed to be alone. 

And here’s the thing: they know that none of their close friends would care if they were together. Most of them probably have some kind of inkling that they’re together already, and none of them have ever once made a comment about it. 

They’ve been dating for almost a year now, and while they’re not blatantly obvious or advertising their relationship status, it’s also clear in the way they look at each other. Tamaki has always been expressive in everything he does, and loving Kyoya is no different. He doesn’t say it out loud to anyone else, but if you look closely at his searching eyes, you’ll notice that they always come back to Kyoya eventually. 

Still, it’s not something that they’re allowed to have. This—in love—is not who they are supposed to be. This—together—is not who they are expected to be. There is something evil in Tamaki that wants Kyoya and doesn’t care what his father thinks. There is something disgusting in Tamaki that craves Kyoya’s touch and doesn’t give a shit that his grandmother might disown him for real this time. There is something horrible and terrible and brave in Tamaki that chooses to love Kyoya in spite of the world. 

But there is also something scared in him that is not ready for the rest of the world to see it. There is something in him that does not want Haruhi to understand this part of them. There is something in him that doesn’t want to share. 

Because, really, at the end of the day, here is what it comes down to: there is the world and the universe and everyone in it, and then there is Tamaki. There is Tamaki, on the other side of the glass, reading DO NOT TAP GLASS backwards. There is Tamaki, distant and drifting and untethered from the rest of the world. From Haruhi and the hosts and even, sometimes, from Kyoya. 

There is something in him that is still a fourteen year old child messing up the grammar of his second language and reeling from his grandmother’s hatred. There is something in him that is still a fifteen year old boy falling in love and terrified of the consequences for having a feeling. There is something in him that is still a sixteen year old watching his best friend, slapped by his father because of a dream they shared. 

There is the world and its intricacies, and then there is Tamaki and his eccentricities. There is the world and its beauty, and then there is Tamaki and his monstrosity. As the earth spins forward, advancing around the sun, instead of being carried along with it, he’s left behind in the riptide: losing his family, losing his first love, losing his mind, losing his heart. 

“Haruhi,” Kyoya says, staring at her. 

“Hi,” she says. 

“Please—” Tamaki starts, then cuts himself off. 

Haruhi just nods. Maybe she understands. Maybe she doesn’t. Maybe Tamaki’s side of Tamaki vs. The World is expanding. Maybe it’s not. Maybe she just doesn’t know what else there is to say. Maybe she’s just letting this slip through her fingers without making a big deal out of it, in the same way as she lets go of so many things. 

But maybe it doesn’t matter either way, if she cares or doesn’t care. Maybe it doesn’t matter if the fight is him against the world or him and Kyoya and his friends against the world. Maybe what matters is that there’s a fight in the first place, and that he is losing it. 

[meowzfordayz]

Hey hey T! Congratulations on your ✨milestone 10.0✨ !! I remember *slow eater* hcs was ur first work i read and then bam bammm (im gyo anon also btw have i told u that surprise surprise 😂 gyo anon and 🧦 anon r oneee)

maam may i request romantic hcs with gyo 🤍 sfw, nsfw ANY im a sucker for tooth-rotting mushy mushy squishy fluff please maam thank u iluvü 💗

About me: ppl say i look mean but rlly it's just my face i'm sorryyyt ;-; but when they got to know me i am described as very funny (when i was in 11th grade the teacher asked who the class clown was and they said it be me ?? I'm pretty sure its that other guy but okayy 🤧) and fun to be around with/ knows how to lift ppl's mood up (this touched me i swearrr bc i didn't know i have that effect on ppl until it's palanca time and ye,, one of my insecurities is i'm not rlly good with words and so when i have to comfort someone i just sit with them while also looking for someone who can help better like gurl help me idk what to sayyydbrjdhh and so learning that i can brighten their day with just my presence or just casually saying smthng is just 🤯) ++ calm and collected bc usually i'd just laugh it off but rn idk anymore gurl i think these were just a fascade im a wreck inside haha sarcasm is how i cope 😭

i'm very straightforward esp to my friends bc i don't wanna give them false hope or anything tho i do the sandwich method to not make it seem too harsh 😭 i'm also the friend who (whichever group i'm in) people hold onto like link arms,, when walking, standing or just sitting they just grab both my arms (1 friend on the right another on the left) like they do to their moms or smthng (now i feel old jkjk is it bc im a little taller? 😭) and it gives the feeling that oh no smol children must protectt like i literally look like am chaperoning kids HAHA tho its cool bc i feel like my arms are the chosen ones ✨ i want to do that too yknow hold someone's arms for a change or like be held 🥺 ,, most of my friends are shorter than me (nothing against height !!) i just feel like its weird if *i* do it :"))) I also have this habit of whenever i'm seating next to someone i'd borrow there arm and just go squish squish

I'm an introvert. just the thought of preparing to go somewhere and actually taking the trip there is already draining the sh*t out of me. There are times when mid convo i'd just shutdown tho i still will try to keep a polite face even tho inside i just hURRY UP Iwanna go hOmE sorry dude but idk there are ppl whose energy are draining but there are those who compliments well wid u idk idk

i like letterssss vvvvmuch <3 i'm also sentimental like i keep eveeerything bus tickets, movie tickets, my first shot glass ugHH u could give me a leaf and just write to and from and id keep that foreeever. even that one time in 10th grade where we were practicing for an event in the grassy area and bc we were bored we made smol bouquets madE ouT Of GrAsS i still freaking have it and thaT One letter from a friend which came with a rock she painted with a face on so cuuuute ✨

i want to say my hobby is drawing but my degree requires me to draw too so like drawing *again* as a hobby now just pisses me off bc my brain says: instead of drawing that why don't u just do ur plates 🤡

I looove animalsss (cats cats we have 4 cats and 3 kittens) my fave wild ones are 🐳 & 🐘 idk it's just they're so big and mighty but they're very gentle and caring and helpful to other animals too •u• i wanna pet them and hug them they make me soft.

What i like about myself are my sense of humour (no i'd burst out laughing at 2am i was about to fall asleep and my brain be randomly making jokes 😤), my guts bc it's sharp afff, ability to recover fast (i'm not sure with this one bc i know im not addressing my issues properly but like hey i got alot of shit to do so chop chop 👏) , and my imagination bc my head is wilddd).

wow this got super long i'm sorry ;-; thank you maamm! And have an awesome and safe day at work today!! 🧦

MILESTONE 10.0

💞: Himejima Gyomei

holds your hand before crossing the street, because if anything tragic were to occur, then at least he will have been holding your hand. Similarly, he's mindful of his parting words to you: variations of I love you being his go to. About to hang up on him because you're angry? He always manages to squeeze in We'll figure this out. About to fall asleep because he's exhausted? He never forgets to mumble Sweet dreams. About to be on your way somewhere for some time? He sends you off with Have fun, stay safe.

sponsors a wild tiger with you (has the certificate framed and everything), and participates in annual fundraisers hosted by wild cat sanctuaries. Last Valentine's Day, he purchased and dedicated a heart (really just a chunk of meat) to you, which was then fed to your favorite leopard. "You're disturbingly sweet," you'd giggled, pecking his cheek as you rewatched the Instagram reel of your "heart" being devoured for the nth time, "Thank you so much!"

gifts you a journal for your third anniversary, but it's already mostly full — mostly full of things you've said that made him smile/giggle/laugh. Of course, it isn't a comprehensive, entirely accurate record, but it includes: inside jokes that you'd inevitably forgotten (until getting to read them again), witty retorts and quips that you'd figured he hadn't heard (turns out he had), and an obnoxiously long section reserved for your puns-that-are-arguably-too-much-of-a-stretch-to-truly-be-punny.

[skyland2703]

20 and 63 from the mashup list!!

(...possibly bbrae if you want because thats what i'm dying to see in Titans Academy, but i give you freedom of whichever ship you choose <3)

Sooooo BBRae you say.... *wink* (two of my fave tropes EVER!)

20: Everybody Knows/Mistaken for Couple AND 63: Teacher AU TWO OF MY FAVORITE TROPES EVER!!

I hope you like it!!!

I take wayyy too fucking long to write sooo im sorry about the delay on the prompts my friendos!!!

AO3!

Everyone knew it. It was no secret. Even if it was, it wasn’t at all, a well kept one. And the best part was, everybody was talking about it.

And it was NOT a good thing for two particular professors at the Titans Academy. Every time they were together, be it standing together, or sitting together or even when they had a joint class together. Whispers, whispers, whispers. Someone had even drawn a heart with a marker on their photograph that had somehow appeared next to each other in every single Academy yearbook that had been distributed! Of course, Nightwing planned to “go to the bottom of the mystery” being the master detective he was, but for reals, everyone knew he was the one of the two people who might have done it. The other being Victor Stone a la Cyborg.

Raven didn’t find it hard to block out the whispers and the voices. She was an empath, and would hear people’s emotions and thoughts quite regularly, and blocking them out was a sort of regular thing for her. Whispers were also easy to drown, especially when they didn’t carry any weight as such.

Beast Boy on the other hand, Raven often noticed, got unnerved when faced with things like this. He was a nice, high spirited, cheerful goofball, who didn’t really fare well at hiding emotions. If he was frustrated, flustered, annoyed, angry, or rather anything except happy, it’d show quite easily on his face. It was one of the things Raven loved the most about him, he was perfectly transparent, not like other guys who liked to keep their emotions bottled up, and not in a way like Raven’s where her emotions overloading might end up in her demonic powers getting out of control, but rather, a case of being “Wayy too cool to have emotions or be nice”.

Raven had a strong dislike for boys like that, boys who faked how they felt, and were actually really manipulative and shrewd. Beast boy was definitely not one of them. And that was one of the many reasons why she didn’t mind the whispers. If people around the academy were shipping her with someone, she was glad it was Beast boy.

She had just started grading the term papers in the teacher’s lounge, when she suddenly realised there was a question in the paper about adaptibility to adverse conditions, a question that she, Raven Roth did not put in her section of the paper. And honestly didn’t know the answer of either. Starfire had wanted the questionnaires to be set by the entire staff together, or if that was not possible with a lot of bickering, then with all the professors sending their respective questions to her, the headmistress, who could compile it into a perfect question paper that would set a challenging questionnaire for the heroes in the making.

And the teachers were allotted a group of students whose papers they had to check, whether they knew the questions or not. “You can use the help of the friends and the other teachers of the school to help you with the questions that you do not the know” she had said sweetly, “it will only make the bonds of your accord and companionship grow the stronger”

Nobody had a heart to refuse.

The first six questions were easy, and two were not from Raven’s subject of Enchantment and Charms, but simple stuff, that Raven could mark with ease, but question no. 7 was something else entirely.

“Beast boy will know the answer to this” raven muttered and got up, taking a sample paper from her desk, and dashing out of the door, knowing she’ll be back in a few minutes with some in depth knowledge of the subject.

On the way, she scanned the paper for more questions to ask Beast boy, while she was at it, so she wouldn’t have to run again and again. In the paper of forty questions, she found 8 she couldn’t do without his help.

He was standing in a classroom drawing some stuff about some animal characteristics on the white board, when Raven arrived.

“Hey” She said, standing in the doorway, beckoning him.

“Hey!!” he replied back cheerfully, and the entire class, which had been listening attentively, suddenly burst into hushed whispers.

“Beast boy I need some help” she said, blushing a bit, feeling some of the whispers reach her...

“Oh!” He blushed just as she did, it was a reflex action that happened any time she said anything to him. He scratched the back of his neck, “um mama— I mean raven, I’m a bit busy, but what happened??” No matter how busy he was, he would always make time for her.

“Umm class, try seeing the patterns in the leopard, and how they take care of their young ones, and I’ll be back in ten” he said, in his most serious voice, but the entire class burst into excited whispers again.

“Hey Rae!” He said, still blushing, still flustered, as he came out into the corridor to face her.

“I wanted to ask you some stuff” she said, handing him the paper, “first off, question seve—” before she could complete her sentence, Gar interrupted her.

“Hey, umm Rae can I ask you something?” He said, a little hesitantly, and Raven stopped short, “Sure Gar, what happened?”

“Actually… I… uh. The way you, the way you pulled me out of the classroom… won’t help with the… the whispers…” he said, a little flushed.

Raven understood. Beast Boy was again having trouble with dealing with what people said behind his back, and students, in general, can be quite mean.

“Oh” was all she said, and Waited for him to continue, but he didn’t.

“Gar?” She asked, gently, once again, placing a hand on his shoulder, “why do you worry so much about what people say about you and me?”

He gulped, “it’s not like… it bothers me…. It’s more like…” he struggled to find the right words.

Raven didn’t need to use her empathic powers to know what he wanted to say, because deep down, in a place where she rarely let her emotions wander, she felt the exact same way.

“It’s more like you *want* them to be true.”

Garfield Logan looked at her for a long, LONG minute, trying to understand what she had just told him, and it took him a hot second, but his blush went up about a thousand times, as he realised.

“Are you… saying… that… you also… want… those whispers to be… real?” He stuttered nervously, and Raven smirked. Just like she had imagined it in her head countless times.

What was that other thing she had imagined?

Oh yes.

“The whispers… I think it’s time enough that we give the smoke a flame to brag about” she said, pulling him by his collar, closer, and softly planting a kiss on his lips. Her lips softly brushed against his, preciously, delicately, like the tiny, fluttering wings of a butterfly, just long enough that he could inhale her breath, feel the warmth of her skin, let his heart skip a few beats, before it was over, way too soon, and left a taste of her lipstick lingering on his lips.

“I’ll ask you about the term papers later” she winked playfully, spun around on her heel, and left, leaving a stunned, more red than he was green, Beast Boy who was basically at this point stranded on cloud nine, with no bounds of his joy.

Of course, this would NOT help the situation with the rumours and the whispers, and the fact that everybody knew that this was bound to happen at some point in time or another.

Beast Boy was jerked back into the present by the sound of a window pane breaking as the the entire class practically attempted to stay inside, while at the same time get as much of a view at the professors, to gawk at their conversation in the hallway through the glass windows of the classroom.

[honesthammie]

Te amo

I am working on a few of the other prompts and a part 2 to prompt 4 the soulmate au I just recently got another puppy and I still have uni work to do so I'm a bit behind schedule with these and I'm so sorry. Hopefully this little kinda songfic makes up for it.

13th doctor x female reader

Warnings: swearing as usual, fluffy, sad thoughts, twist the original songs meaning, long as fuck.

Probably terrible as its my first songfic

I don't know much Spanish so some of the examples later on are Google translated and I know it can be wrong so I do apologise for any mistranslations

This is based off Rhiannas song Te Amo but I'm switching it up a little. I dont why 13th doctor came into my head when I was listening to it but it gave me this lil oneshot idea so enjoy! The picture is not mine but the rainbow effect added is done by me! Same for the picture later on.

I've been travelling with this amazing alien for a whole year now. The adventures are always amazing if she's there! The others sometimes complain and say its boring, especially on a junk planet but to see her face light up with excitement makes my day and it well worth the dirt we cover ourselves on by the time we are done. And when she finds something that she thought was useful and it turns out, it's not her scrunch is amazing.

Okay, I'll admit it. I'm in love with this alien. I know, weird, a human and an alien together? But I can't help it! I'm completely besotted with her. If she even looks in my direction, my legs go to jelly and I get butterflies. I know, cheesy. But thats exactly how I feel around her. I barely want to touch her because I nearly fainted the last few times. And I fear she may pick up on how I'm distancing myself from her. I don't want to break her heart and leave, the thought of her look kills me as is so I'm trying to get her to kick me off.

It doesn't seem to be working though. I've been distancing myself since I found out about how I feel, which is now 6 months ago and she's trying to get me to be as close as I was with her.

I'll tell her. On one of our amazing adventures but I can't do it straight forward, it's making me sick with anxiety just thinking about it. I'll fancy it up, make her work it out. Whenever we are next to each other and the moment is right, I'll tell her in another language!

I finally get out of bed after I finished writing in my diary. I slip some comfy clothes on and head out to the TARDIS library and hope no one is there, especially her. I'll be distracted and right now, I need to concentrate. I wonder the warm halls, grateful that the TARDIS had considered my preferences. I think the TARDIS likes me more than the others because I talk to her and show her gratefulness for taking us somewhere amazing and I chat to her regularly and I try to involve her in my conversations. The others find it weird, except for the Doctor, she just smiles and joins in with me. Im still learning how to translate her but I think I've sort of got it.

I reach my hand forward and grab the aged bronze doorknob and open to the giant room. There were so many floors that an elevator had to be used to access some of them as the Doctor said "walking would literally take weeks to reach some floors". Thankfully the TARDIS organises them to make them easier to find. I looked forward and saw an interactive map in front of me. My hands touched the screen and many subjects and categories came up. Anything ranging from kiddie tales to straight up smut, I have a feeling either River or Missy are to blame for that addition.

I've never met them but the TARDIS showed me videos from her database and brought books to my attention about them. They both seem very dirty minded people so I'm not surprised those are there. I wonder if the Doctor has ever stumbled upon this section or is it for none Doctor eyes only? If she does know about them, has she ever read one? No, don't go there you stupid brain! She probably doesn't know!

I quickly stop that train of thought and catch my breath. I've never thought about those kinds of things about anyone before. Stupid Timelord, making me go all weird and think dirty things. Now my face is all red, I really hope I'm alone in here. I quickly focus back to the task at hand, finding a new language to learn. The TARDIS seemed to know where to go and blue arrows appeared, guiding me to the right section in what could be a maze.

As I walking, I felt excitement rise within me. What if she felt the same way? What if she was impressed by how far I wanted to go just to say those 3 words? Would her hazel honey eyes sparkle with delight? Would she scronch her nose in amazement?

Before I knew it, I'd arrived at the language learning section and there were many alien languages but the TARDIS seemed to have a better idea of what would be perfect for me as a white hardback book fell off the 4th shelf onto the wooden floor. I picked it up and noticed how smooth the cover was and how old yet unused it looked. The white was a little off, almost a dull cream from ageing which made the gold writing harder to read. The title was simple:

Spanish basics and need to knows.

I did always find Spanish in school fun to learn, more than French or German anyway and I don't wanna stereotype this into a typical French is the language of romance. I never really found it romantic sounding compared to Spanish.

I picked up the book and quickly flicked through to the right page and took a note on my phone as to what the translation was and put the worn book away. I quietly thanked the TARDIS and rushed out of the library and back into my room where I could practice without getting caught.

A few weeks have passed since I picked up the new words and practiced them until I was confident and had the TARDIS' approval that I was saying it right. Today the Doctor wanted to take us to this party in the 18th century and we all decided to dress for the part once we landed.

Yaz was wearing a beautiful black and red ballroom gown, accented with little bows around the bottom and lace cuffs. She had her black hair curled into a ponytail. It was simple and cute, much like her style normally. Graham and Ryan wore similar suits but Graham wore green accents and Ryan wore yellow accents.

I let the TARDIS pick my dress. She picked a black and dark blue ballroom gown with blue roses on the bottom. It had black lace underneath and blue lace as the cuffs. The gown also seemed to glitter slightly in the light making me sparkle very subtly. I put my comfy boots on as you couldn't see my shoes as I walked anyway so why did it matter? With all the running we do, I'm not risking my ankles with heels, thank you very much. I had my (h/c) hair in (fave style). It suited my dress perfectly.

I nearly choked on oxygen when I saw how hot the Doctor looked in her suit. It took me a few moments to realise we match. We both blushed at the realisation. Of course the TARDIS makes us match! No wonder why she was more than eager to help me pick an outfit! Stupid sentient ship, shipping us already!

I quickly cleared my throat and complimented everyone on how amazing they looked but I just couldn't take my eyes off the Doctor for long. She was like a magnet for my eyes. Someone help before she realises!

"Don't we all look brilliant? Perfect for the party! 18th century Yorkshire to be exact! What a great century for you guys. Now then, this party is for Nobles and higher, as per usual in these times. Ryan, I suggest you keep in mind about any racist comments that may come out. But as long as you say your Graham's personal butler, you should be welcomed with little resistance. And Yaz, I want you to be (y/n)'s personal maid. That does mean you'll have to follow your so called "masters" around and do anything they ask unfortunately and Graham, (y/n), please act like the others around you and use them. Unfortunately this is the only way all 5 of us can join the party. You'll be fine as long as you bite your tongues. Now the Noble Edward Collins is the host so be sure to thank him for inviting you, even though you technically weren't. And try not to get too drunk, I know what you humans are like! Now follow me." The Doctor explained. I was going to tell the Doctor today, but I guess, I'll have to wait.

The Doctor opened the doors and we were in a cupboard under some gorgeous marble stairs. As we walked towards the party I noticed some family portraits along the walls. They were a very beautiful looking family. The mother had long blonde hair and pale blue eyes. The father was buff, long brown hair and daring brown eyes. There were two children, a girl and a boy. The girl had long brown hair and sparkling blue eyes, whilst the son had blonde hair and brown eyes. They also had a brown greyhound dog laying by the sons feet. The son must be the host, Edward. He looked not much older than 10 in the last painting but the daughter was no where to be found in the portrait and theu all looked mournful. Is she dead and is that the picture capturing the moment of grief? Why would anyone want that? It's so strange, even for this time period.

The Doctor held me and Yaz close, stopping us in our tracks. My heart was racing at the simple touch. But as soon as the touch was there, it was gone. "I hope its okay with you (y/n) but you're going to have to be married to someone."

My heart stopped for a moment and I nearly choked on air. "What? Why?"

"Because women like yourself would have been married as young as 13 or 14. Now your only choices are me and Graham. You can't choose Ryan as he's supposed to be a butler and you can't choose Yaz as she's your maid. The choice is yours, I just need to know wether or not I should refer to you as my darling wife or not?"

What. The. Fuck.

Why did her even calling me that l, turn me on? Obviously, I'm going to choose her but I'm going to have to perfect my reasoning here.

"As much as I love Graham, it's going to be awkward if I have to kiss him or anything because he's like my grandad! I guess you'll do Timelord. Come on then husband, we don't want to be late to the dancefloor!" I spoke clearly hoping she didn't notice how excited I actually was to have even a hint of a relationship with her. It may be fake but ill take anything when it comes to her.

We arrived at the welcome committee and handed our cards over, aka the psychic paper. We were going as Mr and Mrs (last name). The Doctor was holding my hand this entire time and it's driving me insane. I don't know if she can feel my racing pulse under her fingers but if she can I hope she puts it down to excitement! We walked down the most grandest staircase you would ever lay your eyes on.

First we walked around, greeting everyone as they came up to us or if she dragged me to someone she knew, but not personally. She was cute when she was fangirling over these people. Yaz found it annoying as she just wanted to party but I couldn't help it. The way her eyes shimmer with recognition was more beautiful than any galaxy she could ever take us. Sometimes her eyes flickered with admiration and it did make me have jealousy for just a moment before I remembered, I'm staying with her and they aren't .

As the party moved on we met the host Edward. He looked a lot different than in his paintings. He was around 20 years old now and his blonde hair was below his shoulders. He looked a lot like his father with his muscley build. And he was very charismatic which I did not like as he poured all his charm into the Doctor. Does everyone here know that he's gay or does he see through the Doctors disguise? Either way, it was rubbing me the wrong way. I quickly excused myself with Yaz and walked into the bathroom.

"I did not like him. I do not like this Edward guy. Something about him rubs me completely wrong. He's handsome but something is telling me he knows the Doctor isn't a man."

"I felt the same way. He knows something we don't. Before we go out there again, do you mind if I ask you a question?" Yaz asked. My mind was racing a hundred miles an hour. She knows. The jig is up with Yaz. "How do you feel about her, honestly? One minute you 2 are inseparable, then you distance yourself and now you are a nervous wreck around her! I won't judge but I just want to make sure my theory is correct."

Shit. I guess I really was obvious. Does she know?

"If your theory is about me falling hopelessly in love with the Doctor then you'd be correct. I can't help it. I'm going to tell her how I feel without being completely stupid. I just need a right moment to say it." I spoke with a heavy sigh. Hopefully, Yaz can help create that moment thay I need. She nods her head and opens the door. We walk back to the Doctor and notice Edward has gone to other guests and she was talking to Graham. I looked around and saw Ryan flirting with a pretty lady near the food table. Why am I not surprised?

A few hours had passed and the Doctor seemed bored with standing and talking so I made a plan in my head. I grabbed her hand and pulled her to the dancefloor as the next song came on. I didn't quite know how to dance properly but I knew the basics if it. She has to lead and I simply follow suit. It took a few moments but I got the hang of it with the Doctors help. Soon we were dancing so gracefully underneath the most beautiful candelabra that lit up her face perfectly.

Her hair swayed to our perfect dance ever so gently. Her eyes sparkled with amusement and her lips were in a permanent smile. She even laughed a couple of times. Then as the music slowed down to a pace that was perfect, I grabbed her waist and looked her. My heart was going crazy and my legs were about to buckle but I had rehearsed my lines. I can do this.

"Hey Doc. Its been an amazing time with you but I can't continue this without being honest with you. But everytime I get close, I back down in fear. So I'm going to let you figure it out. Doctora te amo. Entiendo que si no sientes lo mismo y me iré si quieres. (Doctor i love you. i understand if you don't feel the same way and i'll leave if you want.)" I spoke with as much passion and intention as I could. I looked into her eyes and saw her confused and trying to work out what I said. I would find it cute if my heart was beating right out of my chest. "Well, I've had a great time but I'm fucking knackered. I'm calling it night. I'll be heading to the TARDIS if you need me."

"I'll come with ya. I'm knackered as well and we both need each other to undo the corsets and mine is starting to hurt a little bit. How we used to do this for a full day, everyday, is beyond my understanding. As beautiful as we look, I don't think its worth the pain this will bring in the morning." Yaz spoke with a slight mumble as proof of her mental state and finishing with a yawn. I chuckled at her state and walked back to the TARDIS with a small amount of chat along the way.

She is right though. These corsets really do hurt you after a while, I'm glad I chose not to wear heels or else I'll be fucked for in the morning. I would literally scream. I think the Doctor had the right idea in wearing a suit, no pain. I do feel bad for leaving her but I just need some space after basically admitting everything that's been built up within me for too damn long. Maybe I should tell Yaz how it went and maybe she can help determine if the Doctor is happy or not.

We walked back into the wardrobe room and I helped Yaz out of her corset. She immediately sighed in relief. She finished getting herself into comfy clothes and started to untie my ribbon.

"So did you tell her?"

"Sort of. I basically told her everything but in Spanish. I just hope it doesn't change anything, except in a positive way, of course! If she wants me gone, I've told her that it's fine and I understand. She's very socially awkward and as cute as I find it, it may not help me in this situation. Do you have any clues on how she may react once she figures it out?"

Yaz stopped untying my corset for a moment and placed 1 finger upon her chin in thought. Her eyes were almost shut and seemed almost completely black in the light. After what seemed like forever, she took her finger off her chin and beamed a toothy smile. Her eyes sparkled as she remembered something and seemed to gleam slightly menacingly. A smirk replaced her smile soon after.

"There's a few times she's shown affection towards you. And I mean romantic affection. She always chooses to hold your hand over anyone else's if given the choice. She always steps I'm front of you when an enemy threatens to kill us all or hurt us in anyway. When you go wandering around on your own, she's terrified thats she's lost you forever to an enemy we don't even know of!" Yaz starts explaining carefully as if she's worried on how to word it.

"Those are just friendly affec-"

"I wasn't done. I was warming up." Yaz interrupts me as I was about to go into a self deprecating speech on how I'm just a friend to everyone and never a lover. "She always looks to see your face on adventures because she secretly loves your reactions, bad or good. When the Master revealed himself, she looked straight at you for support on how she should react. When she came back from the Kasavin, she ran straight to you and made sure you were ok first before any of us. When we were in the Tsungra medical ship, the first person she asked for was you! Whilst she was unconscious on board the ship, she kept mumbling your name, over and over again. When she saw how gorgeous you looked today, I thought she'd take you right there on the spot! She fucking loves you (y/n)! You're just so unbelievably blind to it all!"

Yaz was almost red with rage. Did she really do all that, for me? The TARDIS mustve read my mind and seemed to hum positively in reply. If everything Yaz said is true then she'll be so happy about it and maybe we can be a thing! But then again, maybe losing so many in a similar position as me will turn her away. Maybe her soul is awry and she's asking why right now.

Once I had gotten changed I went to sleep almost straight away, I suppose all that dancing and social ques having tired me out more than I thought.

I woke up to a soft knock on my door. I rubbed my (e/c) eyes and told them I'd be a few minutes as I've only just woken up. It wasn't until I finished brushing my (h/c) hair that I remembered what happened yesterday. All the panic rushed within me at once and I nearly threw up. I took several deep breaths and opened the door.

"GRAHAM THANK FUCK ITS YOU!" I almost shouted at him. He looked a little bewildered for a moment before he seemed to remember what brought him here in the first place.

"Hello Love, I'm here because Doc wanted to speak with you privately in the library. She says that the TARDIS will guide you to her location. She seemed a little off after you and Yaz left. Did something happen? Is everything ok?" Graham asked cautiously. He must be so confused.

"Sort of. I'll explain more when I get back but what do you mean by "a little off"?"

"Well she seemed lost in all sense of the word. She kept muttering "Te Amo" all the time. She was all over the place aswell. She got me and Ryan back here not long after you guys. Something about not trusting Ryan to not get alcohol poisoning without her around. She hasn't really left the library since if I'm honest. She's been in there for 12 hours. I only know she wants you because she whattsapped me on my phone. Whatever is going on, please sort it out, she's starting to really worry me. She hasn't been the same since that Master guy came around." Graham spoke clearly, albeit confused. I nodded my head and walked in the opposite direction to him and hoped the TARDIS would take me there quicker than normal. I want to treat this like a plaster, rip it off in one go.

Sooner than I realised, I grabbed the all too familiar door knob of the library. I took a deep breath and walked in. A blue line appeared towards the interactive map. I awakened the console and I saw a black screen with a few words on it. It looked like a message with how it was presented.

Hello (y/n)! Don't walk until you calm. Breath deeply and try not to panic. I promise you, all will work out in the end. I see more than you realise and I know my thief better than anyone whoever stepped foot into my being. I know of her main problem about the situation. If she loves you, drink this. It won't hurt, she'll know what it is.

The TARDIS

I should have been surprised by this new knowledge that she could speak to me, in a way, but I've seen so much and I am so tender hooks so I didn't take much notice of it. I quickly sat down and tried to control my breathing. After about 5 or so minutes, I felt calm enough to finally meet up with her and hear what she has to say.

I followed the blue line carefully until I spotted her in a comfy room. She mustve gotten changed at some point as she was wearing her usual rainbow outfit, minus the jacket. She was sat on a deep purple sofa, legs curled into her body. Her shoes were on the carpeted floor underneath her, seemingly forgotten for the moment. There were many books surrounding us from many cultures and spieces. One wall had a cozy wood burning fireplace crackling within the silence that surrounded us.

Her face was scrunched within deep thought. Her eyes sparkling with an emotion that I couldn't quite put my finger on; hope, sorrow or excitement? Her lips had a small smirk gracing them and her teeth had bitten a small part of it. Her hands were holding a book in a way where I couldn't quite see what it was.

I didn't want to disturb her as she looked so ethereal with the warm glow of the fire highlighting her in the perfect way. Unfortunately, it's plaster time and I wanted this sorted sooner rather than later. I took a deep breath took in the picture for memory.

"Hey, Graham said you wanted to talk to me? Is everything ok?" I asked gently and as softly as I could so she was carefully brought out of her little world. I didn't want to scare her. She raised her eyes from her book for a moment and bookmarked the page she was at with a little TARDIS paperclip. She placed the book on the table at the side of her and patted the seat next to her.

As I sat down my nerves were through the roof. She gave nothing away as she stared at me for a minute, as if assessing something about me.

"Why are you so nervous? Calm down. You are right, It is to do with last night. You left pretty abruptly after basically confessing your feelings to me. I was so confused, not just about what you said but about myself and what I wanted to do about you." The Doctor spoke monotonously. Did she mean get rid of me? "I had to first of all, find out what you said, well done on learning a new language by the way, one even I'm not fluent at. I'm guessing the old girl had something to do with that idea. Not that, you aren't smart enough but you don't know what languages I do or don't know."

The Tardis seemed to chuckled at the accusation and I simply nodded my head. "I wanted to buy myself time and to impress you."

"You impressed me a long time ago Miss (l/n). That is just a cherry on top. After I figured out what you said, no thanks to my old friend here, I went through a lot of thinking. I've not been in many relationships and you know my history regarding the ones I have been in. You know, River and Missy? And I have such a bad past with it ending in nothing but tears for me. I always lose those I care for deeply." She spoke with tears spilling from her gorgeous eyes. I grabbed her face gently and wiped away the stray tears that managed to escape their home.

"That was when you were a man. You're a woman now, everything is so different. Relationships can be heartbreaking. I know what you're main problem is and the TARDIS has a solution to that. I just need you to tell me the truth. How do you feel about me? Do you want me to stay or not?" I stated holding the small shot glassed amount of liquid in my hand. The liquid was golden and sparkled slightly in the light. There were specks of orange and silver within it and it was as hot as a nice cup of (hot drink). Her eyes sparkled with hope and shock. Her lips were smiling wide. And she seemed to giggle at the sight of it. She held it for a moment as if examining it like a rare artefact, maybe it was. Either way, I trust her judgement and if she's happy about it, then so am I. Once she had analysed the drink, she practically leapt into my arms and pushed me down on my back. She smelled of custard creams and the TARDIS which was odd but completely her and I couldn't imagine her smelling any other way.

"That does solve our problem! What she has just given you is the rarest liquid in the universe seeing as only one thing in the entirety of space can produce it. That drink is known as the nectar of the chosen ones. It's rare as the race that used to make them has practically gone extinct. There's only 3 left in the known universe and you're living in one. That drink is the blood of the TARDIS. It grants you immortality if you drink it. It is said to resemble your favourite beverage no matter who you are. However, it only lasts 100 years and you must drink it every century or else your body clock will kick in and you will age and be as mortal as you are now." She speaks with a warning as we sit up holding holds.

"I have no problem with that. I would sacrifice everything if it meant I got to call you mine. Just please tell me and I'll drink it." I told her with adoration in my eyes.

She held me close and planted a soft and gentle kiss to my lips. It was short but it sent more fireworks than you can imagine through my body. I knew I had found her. She grabbed my waist and whispered next to my ear:

"Te Amo"