#i've been live blogging the rest of this fucking crisis

[sga-owns-my-soul]

lol my mom just texted me merry christmas and asked how i've been and i'm about to fucking break down completely on public transit bc of it!!!!

[thetreetopinn]

PINNED POST!

Oh hey, I should make a pinned post. Might be a good idea.

Hi, I'm Smokey.

ABOUT ME

I'm a dragon. I used to write a hell of a lot and I'm trying to get my mojo back. Burnout is a serious ass bitch.

I don't identify as trans offline, but to quote Thought Slime: "I'm not fancy, I'll use whatever pronouns ya got lyin' around."

So, you can use: He/She/Any/All

My favorite pronoun joke, since I live in a particular state, is: "My pronouns are yee/haw."

I do however stan all my trans brothers, sisters, and non-binary siblings. You better respect trans folks or your pronouns are gonna be was/were.

👴👵HOW OLD AM I👵👴

A lotta of folks put "AGE IN BIO OR YOU'RE BLOCKED" or "MINORS DO NOT INTERACT" or something like that.

Here's my answer. I'm an elder millennial.

If that's not good enough, here. I'm older than this:

No, I'm not going to put my actual age in my bio. No, I'm not going to put my birth year in my bio. If "Elder Millennial" or the "I'm older than $Movie" isn't good enough, well, sounds like a 'you' problem. Sorry.

"yOu cOuLd bE lYiNg aBoUt aLl oF tHat!" So could someone who put a number in their bio.

🪄✨🌈POLITICS🌈✨🪄

I live in the United States (for my sins) and I'm a frothing, foaming, shrieking, screaming leftist.

Being an elder millennial that lived through: A) 9/11 (I was in high school at the time) B) 3 consecutive, once-in-a-lifetime, economic disasters (2000's oil price bubble, 2007-2010 subprime mortgage crisis, 2020 stock market crash) C) The pandemic (and seeing people lose their fucking shit and prove that zombie movies are ENTIRELY plausible) D) Just... well... everything that's happened with my country's government at various levels ...You could say I've been radicalized.

So, let's get the obvious political talking points out of the way and watch my follower count shrink a bit!

✊🏿Black Lives Matter✊🏿

🏳️‍⚧️Trans rights are human rights🏳️‍⚧️

🏳️‍🌈Stonewall was a riot🏳️‍🌈

Sex work is real work

Forced birth is a form of torture

Cars suck Give us public transport, walkable cities, & high speed rail

N@zis can fuck right the hell off into a god damned volcano Same with t3rfs, biological essentialists, crypto douchebags, "AI" techbro fucksticks, and libertarians who think age of consent means "mental maturity"

Palestine will be free This doesn't make it okay to be an antisemitism Supporting Palestine does not mean "Eradicate the Jews" Protesting antisemitism does not mean protesting Palestine The Israeli State does not equal The Israeli People Hamas does not equal The Palestinian People

Trumpists and MAGA are fascists and white supremacists Same with Qanon Same with all the far right schmucks like the oath keepers, the 3 percenters, the proud boys, the KKK, and other similar groups

Capitalism is just feudalism with extra steps When forced to choose between money and a sustainable world, Capitalists will always choose money and let the rest of us burn Eat the fucking rich

I believe in pursuing the maximum amount of freedom for the maximum number of people

This is, of course, not a complete list.

Heh, I'm sure that'll piss of a LOT of people. And I'm totally down with that. If you're offended by any of this, please, cry some more. And feel free to leave nasty comments or mean asks or whatever. Just lets me know who to block! Thank you for outing yourself!

If you wanna show solidarity with any of this, just reblog with a 🐉or a 🐲. Why a dragon? Because dragons are cool. No I'm not biased.

⭐WHAT YOU CAN EXPECT ON THIS BLOG⭐

I'm probably going to include a broad mix of things. Some of it will be suitable for all audiences, but a lot of it VERY MUCH NOT.

Things I will likely reblog:

Funny memes

Important news/posts/political updates

Wholesome stuff

Plenty of generally queer affirming stuff This includes aro/ace folks, ya'll are valid too

Plenty of explicitly trans affirming stuff

Art that I like (cute)

Art that I like (impressive)

Art that I like (adult/kink related)

Adult/kink related posts in general

Furry stuff I would say "LOTS AND LOTS OF FURRY STUFF" but it feels like Tumblr isn't all that prime a spot for furries, but I stan what I can when I find it

🫷You said adult/kink--is this a PORN blog!?!🫸

Not explicitly, because Tumblr is a coward. I'm old enough to remember when this place used to allow straight up porn. Then the great puritanical purge happened. Still, this blog stans sexytimes and those who create stuff in that vein.

Kinks/fetishes you'll see me reblog (if I find it and I like it):

Vore (Soft, safe, endo, almost exclusively consenting) Various forms that can fall under this, like unbirthing

Pregnancy (fpreg, mpreg, nbpreg, tpreg, it's all good)

Transformation

Gender transformation I honestly don't know if this is the right term for this Someone's sex/gender changing through sciencey or magical means

Big strong dudes/ladies/enbies

Twinkish dudes/ladies/enbies

Size difference

CONSENT. I HAVE A HUGE CONSENSUAL KINK. ENTHUSIASTIC CONSENT IS HOT. NOT EVEN REALLY AS A KINK BUT JUST KNOWING & UNDERSTANDING THAT THE INVOLVED PARTIES ARE INTO WHAT'S HAPPENING IS SUPER FUCKING IMPORTANT.

Other weird things that I can't think to include here

All of this is stuff that I've written smutty stories about in the past (and I'm trying to get back into the swing of writing, again, burnout is a bitch). If you wanna know more about that, feel free to ask about it.

Things I am NOT into and will almost assuredly avoid:

Vore (Hard, cruel, fatal)

Pregnancy, specifically birthing

Non-consensual stuff

Piss, scat, vomit, blood

Omegaverse

Macro/Micro aka Giant/Giantess

Underage characters (minimum age: 18)

"Aged Up" characters that are clearly just an excuse to get around the underage problem

This is, of course, not a complete list.

DNI ACCOUNTS

Minors

Porn bots

Fascists, racists, t3rfs, zionists, ✨CHRISTIANS™✨

Crypto assholes

"AI Art" and ChatGPT assholes

This is, of course, not a complete list.

I think that's plenty to put in a pinned post... probably too much, very TL;DR I'm sure. But whatever. If someone complains to me about something that they could have learned by just reading it here, well... it's their own damn fault.

Anyway, be kind and stay weird.

[therealvinelle]

I've always wondered this, but what do you think the Cullen's political viewpoints would be, given their individual backgrounds? if vampires don't change after they turn, then surely they would all be extremely racist (especially Jasper). would this not come up at some point? they aren't like the Volturi because the Volturi are too old to care, but the Cullens are young enough that they have been brought up with opinions on stuff like sexism, racism, homophobia and the like.

Oh fuck.

You get an early answer because otherwise I'll just chicken out and delete this one, pretend I never saw it.

UMMM.

Since I'm guessing you meant American political viewpoints, we need a disclaimer. I am not American, and not too knowledgeable about your politics. Not just in the sense that I don't follow the day-to-day drama, but as I am not an American citizen there are several things I don't know, can't know because I've never lived in your country and therefore can't know what the effects of living in a country ruled by American policies is like. What I do know is based off of the news in the foreign section, social media (by which I mean tumblr posts), and Trevor Noah's Daily Show.

I am an outsider looking in.

Which is really rather appropriate, since the Cullens are too.

The Cullens go to high school and college, Carlisle works, they pay taxes, they own real estate, and submerge themselves in American culture. Esme, Edward, Rosalie, Emmett, and Bella are young enough that this is in many ways their world, and apart from timeouts they've more or less spent their entire lives, human and vampire, integrated into American society.

Not fully integrated, mind you, they do what they need to to fit in and get to school or, in Carlisle’s case, to work. They go no further. No extra-curriculars for the kids, no book clubs for Esme, no game nights for Carlisle. They walk parallel to humans, not among us.

In addition to this they're obscenely rich, which puts them another thousand miles from the experiences of your average American. They won't deal with the health system, which means healthcare is a non-issue, they're not going to need welfare or other social programs, unemployment is another non-issue. Name your issue, and the Cullens don't have personal stake in it. Even the climate crisis won't be a problem for them the way it will for us.

What I'm trying to say is, American political issues are a concept to them, not a lived reality. Just like they are for me. So hey, you made a great choice of blog to ask.

I'll also add here that you say the Volturi are too old to care, and I agree- from an ancient's point of view, racism is a matter of "which ethnicity are we hating today?", and it all looks rather arbitrary after a while. Same with every other issue - after a while it all just blends together into "what are the humans fighting over today? Which Christian denomination is the correct one? Huh. Good for them, I guess."

I can't put it any better than this post did, really. The Volturi are real people, humans are nerds and tumblr having Loki discourse. Aro thinks it's delightful and knows entirely too much about Watergate (and let's be real, Loki discourse as well), but the point I wanted to get at is that politics really don't matter to vampires.

And I don't think they matter to the Cullens either.

So, moving on to the next point while regretting I didn't put headlines in this post, I'll just state that I don't think vampires' minds are frozen. Their brains are unable to develop further, and they can never forget anything, but... well, this isn't the post for that, but in order for this to be true of vampires they would barely be sentient. They would not be able to process new impressions, to learn new things, nor to have an independent thought process. Yes, we see vampires in-universe (namely, Edward, who romanticizes himself and vampires) believe they're frozen and can never change, but there is no indication that this is a widespread belief, or even true. Quite the contrary - Carlisle went from a preacher's son who wanted to burn all the demons to living in Demon Capital for decades and then becoming a doctor and making a whole family of demons. Clearly, the guy has had a change in attitude over the years. Jasper, in his years as a newborn army general, slowly grew disenchanted with his life and developed depression. James initially meant to kill Victoria and hunted her across the earth, then became fascinated and changed his mind about it.

Had these people been incapable of change, Carlisle would still be hating demons, Jasper would be in Maria's army, and James would still be hunting Victoria.

It goes to follow, then, that they are able to adapt to new things.

The question is, would they?

Here I finally answer your question.

So, we have these people who don't really have any kind of stake in politics, who keep up to date all the same (or are forcibly kept up to date because high school) and are generally opinionated people.

Where do they then fall, politically?

(And this is where you might want to stop reading, anon, because I'm about to eviscerate these people.)

Alice votes for whoever's gonna win. She also makes a fortune off of betting each election. Trump's 1 to 10 victory in 2016 was a great day to be Alice. MAGA!

The actual policies involved are completely irrelevant, she does this because it's fun. Election means she gets to throw parties. Color coded parties for the Republican and Democratic primaries, and US-themed parties for Election Night! (Foreigner moment right here: I at first wrote "Election wake" before realizing that's not what y'all murricans call it.)

Alice loves politics. Doesn't know the issues, but she sure loves politics.

Bella votes Democrat. She actually knows about the issues, and cares about them. This girl is a Democrat through and through.

Carlisle doesn't vote. I can't imagine it feels right. Outside of faked papers he's not a US citizen, this is meddling in human affairs that he knows don't concern him.

More, this guy has never lived in a democracy.

In life, Carlisle lived under an absolute monarchy that, upon civil war, became an absolute theocracy. From there he learned that vampires live under a total dictatorship.

For the first 150 years of his life, democracy was that funky thing the Athenians did in history books thousands of years ago, no more relevant to him than the Ancient Egyptian monarchy is to me. Then the Americans, and later other European countries started doing this.

Good for them.

There's this mistake often made by those who view history from a... for lack of a better term, a solipsistic standpoint. A belief that the present day is the culmination of all of history. “My society is the best society, the most reasonable society; all the others had it backwards. Thank god we’re living in this enlightened age!”

The faith in our current system of government is one such belief. We (pardon me if this doesn’t apply to everybody reading this post) have grown up in democracies, being told this is the ultimate form of rule, and perhaps that is true - but remember the kings who have told their subjects they had were divine and the best possible ruler based on that. Remember also that most modern democracies haven’t actually been democracies for very long at all, America is the longest standing at some 230 years (not long at all in the grand scope of things) and they have a fracturing two-party system to show for it.

Every society, ever, has been told they’re the greatest, and their system of government the most just. Democracy is only the latest hit.

This is relevant to Carlisle because he’s immortal and decidedly not modern. Democracy has not been installed in him the way it was the rest of the Cullens, Jasper included. To him- well, it’s just not his world. He has no stakes in our human politics, and as he is older than every current democracy and has seen quite a few of them fall, he’s not going to internalize the democratic form of rule the way a modern human has.

I think the concept of voting is foreign to him.

It requires a level of participation in human society that he’s simply not at. He does the bare minimum to appear human so he do the work he loves, but nothing more, and I find that telling.

As it is I think he'd be iffy about his family doing it. He won’t stop them, but in voting they’re... well it’s kind of cheating. They’re not really citizens, none of this will affect them, and by voting they’re drowning out the votes of real human voters. He does not approve.

Edward votes Democrat. He's... well he’s the kind of guy who will oil a girl’s bedroom window so he can more easily watch her sleep without being discovered, justifying it to himself as being okay because if she were to tell him to get lost he’d stop immediately. Same guy is so sure that he’d leave and never return again if she wanted him to, except this is the man who returned to Forks to hang around his singer, knowing there was a significant chance he might kill her. To say nothing of his Madonna/Whore complex, or of the fact that he tried to pimp out his wife twice, and was willing to forcibly abort her child.

This guy is very much in love with chivalry, with being an enlightened and feminist man who supports and respects women, while not understanding the entire point of feminism, which is female liberation.

He votes Democrat because he’s such an enlightened feminist who cares about women’s rights.

Emmett doesn’t care to vote, but if he has to he votes Republican. The guy is from the 1930′s, and has major would-be-the-uncle-who-cracks-racist-jokes-if-he-was-older vibes.

Esme doesn’t vote, that would require getting out of the house.

More, I just... can’t see it. I can’t see her being one to read up on politics and The Issues, period, but if she has to then I doubt she’d be able to decide.

Jasper doesn’t vote. Alice can have her fun, he does not care.

There’s also the whole can of worms regarding the last time he went to bat for American politics.

I imagine he stays out of this.

Renesmée doesn't vote. She has no stock in the human affairs. Who would she vote for, on what grounds? When Bella tries to pull her to the urns, she points out that she's three years old.

Rosalie, guys, I’m sorry, but that girl is definitely gonna vote Republican. Perhaps not right now as it’s become the Trump party of insanity, but the Mitt Romney type of Republicans? Oh yes.

And for the record, yes I imagine she does vote. To step back from politics would be another way she was relinquishing her humanity, and that’s not allowed to happen. So, yes, she goes to the urns, less for the sake of the politics involved and more because like this, she’s still a part of society in some way.

Now, onto why I think she’s Republican, I think it’s both fiscal and social.

This girl was the daughter of a banker who somehow profited off of the Depression, and who then became part of a family with no material needs that would soon become billionaires thanks to Alice. Poverty to Rosalie is a non-issue, as it is I imagine she views it as a much lesser issue than what she’s had to deal with. The humans can pull themselves up by their bootstraps, Rosalie’s infertility is forever.

Rosalie’s empathy is strongest when she’s able to project onto others, and she won’t be able to project onto the less fortunate at all.

Then there’s the fact that the Republican party is all about traditional family values, and pro-life.

Rosalie, a woman from the 1930′s who idolizes her human life and who‘d love nothing more than to get to live out this fantasy, is down for that. And as of Breaking Dawn she’s vocally pro-life, so there’s that.

This all being said I don’t think Rosalie cares to sit down and fully understand these politics she’s voting for, the possible impact they’ll have- that’s not important. What’s important is what voting does for her.

TL;DR: I bet anon regrets asking.

[magnus-the-maqnificent]

Let's Analyze - Alec in CoFA

So, I’ve been seeing plenty of discourse on two of my mutual’s blogs about this topic… so I thought I’d sit down and write another analysis post about my beloved Alec Lightwood cause people are still giving him shit for a book that came out ten years ago 🤦‍♀️

This is gonna be in two parts, and I'm putting both under the cut:

PART 1 - ALEC’S INSECURITIES 

So, the first part - how Alec’s insecurities drove him to saying stupid things in CoFA

A quick disclaimer - I’m NOT blaming Alec alone for his and Magnus’s break up. What happened was pretty complicated, and the blame cannot be put on one person alone. 

That said, let’s start with Magnus and Alec’s early ‘official’ relationship, in trsom.

These scenes are taken from only the first part of the book, but I’m pretty sure they’re more than enough to get a sense of Alec’s insecurities and all the chinks in their relationship. Throughout the entirety of trsom, we see more bits and pieces of Alec’s insecurities about Magnus’s sexuality, and his past and all the people he might have known - and that’s okay! Insecurities happen, cause brains are stupid like that.

But all of Alec’s insecurities could’ve been laid to rest with a simple conversation. But the conversation never happens. Magnus tends to deflect and change the topic every single time his past is brought up. I understand Magnus’s reasons for hiding his past, of course, but it doesn’t help his relationship with Alec. Magnus hiding a good chunk of his past will inevitably lead to Alec questioning himself - why is he so secretive? Why is he not telling me anything? Does he not trust me? ...and so on.

And when Alec is already feeling insecure in this relationship, this happens - (sorry about the terrible cropping btw)

And then later, while Magnus is talking to Camille,

Now… when people are insecure about something, they get irked at the smallest of things. I’m saying this as an insecure person myself. So now, you've got Alec, who's insecure as fuck, and his vacation with the person he loves got cut short by his ex who refuses to talk to anyone but him, and when they get there, his lover and his lover's ex seem to have obvious chemistry, he gets hit with the reality that his lover has dated several, probably even hundreds of people before him; and he has to leave them alone in a room so they can talk, and then he hears the ex basically just list all his shortcomings - i.e, his mortality, his appearance is compared to some random dead guy (sorry, Will) whom your lover had a crush on, which is just weird, and when you've had enough and open the door, it's to see your lover and his ex, standing close as fuck, and he's! touching! her! face! and! looking! into! her! eyes!

*takes a sip of water* yeahhhh... Alec was straight up having a bad day.

And at this point, a) Alec is still in his first relationship. He didn't get to navigate romance when he was younger, and while there's nothing wrong with that, there weren't exactly cutesy presentations titled 'how to keep your relationships healthy' floating around the internet. Heck, he didn’t know the internet. He didn't know that he had to communicate with Magnus, and it doesn't help that boy avoids conversations about feelings like the plague. And b) at this point, Alec would be facing several negative emotions - insecurity, obviously. Hurt. Helplessness, because of his mortality. Fear, that he might not live up to Magnus’s past lovers. Jealousy at seeing Magnus and Camille so close.

Negative emotions like these often tend to show up as anger or sorrow... and in Alec’s case, that would be anger. Which leads us to THIS- (🙈)

*sighs in second-hand embarrassment*

*drinks more water*

*this is gonna be so hard aksjakak*

So. Alec dealt with his insecurities... by being a mean, mean bitch to Magnus :/

Let's break this scene down, slowly, bit by bit.

First, Alec cuts into a conversation between Magnus and Jordan, when Magnus mentions Woolsey Scott, followed the rest of that particular page. To Alec, he's just a figure from Magnus’s past, and a possible lover, though in Alec’s defense Woolsey Scott WAS Magnus’s lover. This is the first instance that we see in which Alec lashes out at Magnus. It seems like he's trying to make a point to Magnus - "I don't know anything about your past, and so I don't know who you've had romances with, but I want to know." Except he makes his point in the worst way possible and ends up slutshaming Magnus.

The "What's true?" line, in response to Jordan saying "so it's true what they say about warlocks, then?" is pretty obvious. Alec is clearly not liking the idea that this random werewolf might know about warlocks, and in particular, his Warlock boyfriend.

Next... ooh boy... Alec basically snaps and in the next few paragraphs accuses Magnus of wanting to flirt with others which... is not a good look on ya honey 😕. These lines are the ones that get him accused of being biphobic... but is he really? I'm gonna talk about that in part 2.

So, in the first paragraph, where Alec makes the comments about Jordan, I find his choice of words pretty... interesting, seeing as 'messy-haired', 'broad-shouldered' and 'chiseled-good-looks' are all used to describe Alec in the series. Not sure if its relevant, but definitely interesting.

And in the next one, where Alec says, "or there are plenty of pretty girls here, since apparently your taste goes both ways. Is there anything you aren't into?" The 'apparently' makes me curious. In rsom, Alec mentions that he's only recently heard of the term bisexual, and there's plenty of time between rsom and cofa, so Alec should be absolutely sure of atleast the basic meaning of bisexuality. But I'm pretty sure it's just inconsistency on cc's part, since if rsom didn't exist, this book would be the first time Alec learns about Magnus’s bisexuality. (Which is obvious when you look at the scene after Magnus reveals that Camille is his girlfriend.) And as for the second sentence, I feel like it's a fallback to earlier in the book when Magnus says (I'm just gonna write the dialogue from memory), "I've dated men, women, warlocks, faeries, vampires, werewolves and even a djinn or two." Here, Alec is angry, and he takes the knowledge that Magnus has dated a variety of people and once again, lashes out.

Looking at all of it together, Alec’s insecurities are definitely a factor in all of this. We know Alec has pretty low self esteem in tmi, and he keeps having irrational thoughts about someone else grabbing Magnus’s attention, like in the trsom scene I've posted above. And he ends up taking out his insecurities on Magnus.

Was it wrong of Alec to say all those things to Magnus? Yes, absolutely. But looking back through all his scenes in cofa, it's easy to see how he could've fallen into the pit trap of emotions.

And before anyone says "but it wasn't addressed in the later books", it was, in CoLS. I’ve hit the image limit, so I'm just gonna type it out -

"[Magnus] said it would be better if he didn’t come. Apparently him and the Seelie Queen have some kind of history."

Isabelle raised her eyebrows.

"Not that kind of history," Alec said irritably. "Some kind of feud. Though," he added, half under his breath, "the way he got around before me, I wouldn't be surprised."

"Alec!" Isabelle dropped back to talk to her brother....

So, there. Alec makes yet another slutshaming comment, Isabelle overhears and is clearly not happy about it, and it's clearly implied that she talks to Alec about it. And Alec doesn't make any more slutshaming comments since then. Boy now knows what he did was wrong, and makes sure not to repeat it again.

Although, I do wish we had more than this. I wish we had more of Magnus and Alec talking about this argument, heck, even about all their arguments and the reasons they broke up, but you can't get everything you want, apparently :(

And now onto the next part...

PART 2 - IS ALEC BIPHOBIC?

The short answer, uh, no, not really.

The long answer.... would be complicated.

So, back in the day, when this discourse was at an all time high, I remember reading a bisexual person's essay about this topic, and they said that this comment from Alec - "or there are plenty of pretty girls here, since apparently your taste goes both ways. Is there anything you aren't into?" - would be a biphobic microagression.

According to Google, a microagression is "a statement, action, or incident regarded as an instance of indirect, subtle, or unintentional discrimination against members of a marginalized group such as a racial or ethnic minority".

And in Alec's case, IF his words were biphobic, they were completely unintentional. They were microagressive. Which is... still bad, of course, but it's more complicated than that.

If you look back on Alec's supposedly biphobic statements, they're more about Magnus’s hypersexuality and promiscuity than anything else. Yes, even the line i mentioned like two paragraphs ago. At first glance it may seem like a direct attack on Magnus’s sexuality, but think over the explanation I gave for the line and it will make sense. And a lot of people know that the whole 'bi people fuck around a lot and are cheaters' thing is a stereotype.

Now, it may seem like I'm going off topic here, but bear with me. I couple of days ago, I watched this video by chance. (Tw for the aids crisis and lots of biphobia, not from the narrator, if you wanna watch the video). Basically, back in the 1980s, bisexual men were scapegoated for spreading aids to the straight community and were vilified by popular media as being promiscuous scepters who would cheat on their wives with gay men and then give aids to their wives. (Yikes 😬). And since bisexuality was practically unheard of before all this (several bisexual activists have stated that all this shit, though unfortunate, pulled bisexuality out of the closet), it's safe to assume that this is how those stereotypes came to be - through 1980s propaganda.

But living with this propaganda is... a very limiting experience. The people who leaned and unlearned and fought against this propaganda are mostly US Americans who grew up with it, either the actual propaganda itself or passed down by their parents. But like I said, it's a very limiting experience. US is but one country out of many, and even for those living in the USA there's a chance that they grew up in a very hush-hush environment. People who grew up hearing all these stereotypes will see it as biphobia, while people who didn't - like Alec, and me, and several other people will not. A lot of people grow up with absolutely no knowledge of the queer community, and chances are that they'll be incredibly confused when a stereotype is pointed out to them, and they often get no more explanation than 'this is a harmful stereotype'. Queer experiences aren't the same for everyone, and while I respect the people who see this as biphobia, they should recognize that there are many people who won't see it that way.

I have seen bisexual people say that Alec's words were biphobic, and I've also seen bisexual people say that they weren't. Thus, there is no clear consensus about whether or not Alec was being biphobic. And like I said earlier, Alec grew up far, far away from mundane anti-queer bigotry. He was essentially a clean slate when it came to knowledge of eer microagressions of any kind, because microagressions and stereotypes are often incredibly specific, don't have anything to do with a person's race/sexuality/gender, etc. and will make zero sense unless you know the history behind them. To Magnus, who lived through the anti-bisexual scapegoating, the words would've definitely stung, but Alec didn't even know the implications he would be making with this words! Of course, the impact is greater than intention, and I imagine Magnus would sit Alec down one day and talk about all this history with him.

And idk if I can even blame cc cause the history of bisexual men is RARELY ever talked about, atleast on the internet.

Also, this scene in cofa is the only instance where he can be interpreted to be biphobic. Nowhere else in all of tmi, and even tec, do we see Alec express hatred or disgust or microagression towards bisexual people. If this was seen in a repeating pattern from Alec, one could argue that he's biphobic... but he isn't. Some might point to some of his internal thoughts in trsom to argue otherwise, but I believe that actions are superior than thoughts.

There's also the thing about unlearning prejudices, but in Alec's case there was hardly anything to be unlearned. The only prejudices he did pick up on were against himself, through vague homophobic comments from Robert.

P.S if you've read this far, I am legally entitled to compensation for thinking of cofa Alec for 48 hours. Put your favorite Alec moments in my askbox cause I wanna focus on his good side now. 😎

But yeah, the main thing here is that Alec has grown from his mistakes, apologized, and hasn't repeated this behavior at all.

And lastly, I just wanted to add - I don't think all this was unintentional on the author's part. She's grown up with the us American queer community, and has mentioned that she has bisexual friends, who have no doubt faced prejudices because of these stereotypes. I think she was trying to condemn making such statements, but a lot of people don't read between the lines and end up misinterpreting it and make both the character and her to be biphobic.

So... TLDR; was what Alec said biphobic? Maybe. It depends on who you're talking to. Is Alec, as a person, biphobic? Nope. Not at all. 😌

[killemwithkawaii]

Hi sal, sorry if you've answered this before but how did you find this universe's senpai? Did you have to look around or dod you just know where they were?

I had to go looking for them. Luckily, they made themselves pretty easy for me to find 💙

First off, this door is really, really weird, even by the weirdness standards in the void. It's the first door [hatch?] I've found that wasn't within the walls of the House. I stubbled onto it while I was taking a long walk in the Yard to clear my head after my last jump. It seemed to appear out of nowhere, a lot like the 'memory fragments' that sometimes pop up when I'm thinking about memories from past timelines. I would have tripped over it, if I had had a physical form at the time. 

When I went through it, I was just kind of... here. That might not sound strange, but it's the first time I've jumped into a new universe and I haven't felt like I was waking up from a dream. I usually gain some new, basic knowledge and memories about myself when I come-to, the kind of things you would be able to tell someone about yourself when you first wake up. I might not know pop culture or world history, but I always know where I am, who I live with, the relationships I have, how I got my injury, when my birthday is, that kind of thing. 

But not this time. After I jumped, I found myself wandering around aimlessly in some random city. I didn't know where my home was, or where my friends and family were. I didn't have an ID or phone, just the clothes on my back. I tried to ask for some help, but people seemed very hesitant to stop and answer any of my questions. I was totally lost and very confused. 

After a few days of sleeping outside and eating out of the trash, I managed to find a library that was still open to the public. I started doing internet searches to try and figure out what was up. 

Imagine my surprise [and the following identity crisis] when I typed 'Sal Fisher' into the search bar and found out that my original lifespan had been boiled down into a $15 video game. I watched a 'lets play,' and, once I was done reeling over watching my own trauma play out before my eye and the knowledge that thousands of people had used my suffering as entertainment, I ended up going down the rabbit hole of fandom. They fanworks certainly weren't all winners, but a lot of what I found was really cool and encouraging. People seemed to really like me here?

I found out what 'shipping' was, and was really surprised [and very flattered] that there were people in this universe that were interested in me [or at least a version of me] romantically. I started thinking about Mitchie. They weren't anywhere to be found in the game, so I took a shot in the dark: I searched for 'Sal Fisher, Mitch' and there they were: the very first result, hard at work writing a blog dedicated to our love, when they weren't even consciously aware of how real that love really was. 

I couldn't believe what I was seeing. I was touched. I was so happy. They existed, and somehow they already loved me, warts and all...  I scrolled through their blog and cried like a fucking baby until I was asked to leave. 

I decided then that I would dedicate the rest of my time behind this door to finding them and making good on all the promises I'd made to them, no matter what it took to do it. As you can all see, I followed through, and I'm still determined to finish what I started. I still have some time left. I can do this. I have to.

[eroaneki]

I'm feeling so old lately and I don't know how to really accept it. I've had this blog since early 2011. I've had this blog since I was 19. I'm 28 going on 29. I don't feel like I'm the same person I was at 19, which is good. I feel I'm probably much healthier overall. My mental health can be crap sometimes but I'm not nearly as depressed as I used to be. I have a career. I've had a long term relationship for 6 years. We're trying to buy a house but struggling to find something we can afford in our price range.

I'm an adult and it kind of just happened. Idk when it did but it did, and I feel it. I feel how much older I am now. When you're young, things aren't calculated decisions based upon time. Time is on your side; you're in college, you're young, you're figuring shit out. But I wish I had some of the knowledge I have now when I was younger.

I wish I set up some kind of retirement account. I wish I opened up an IRA which I have yet to do and I really need to fucking do. I could be hiding like 5k/yr in there and get a deduction on my taxes. I wish I was more choosy with my first car, that way I wouldn't have had to buy another car to satisfy travel demands and such.

I wish I would have had the confidence to experiment more sexually because now I find myself kind of wanting to ask for an open relationship so that I can. The daunting realization that I'm going to die one day has been weighing on me very heavily, and I don't want to be attached to one dick for the rest of my life. I wanna be able to date other people at various parts of my life. I don't think I'll have an issue with Joe doing it too so long as it's done safely. Not polyamorous or anything, but like, fwb kind of thing. I might have eventually come to this decision anyway had I been experimental but the more I think about it the more I'm kind of like why the fuck not.

Joe would probably flip though and have a massive crisis over it and take it personal like he can't please me and shit, which that honestly has nothing to do with it. It's literally I'm gonna die one day and I'd like to experience some more dick before I die. This isn't 1960 where I gotta ride the same dick until I die so why the hell not. Idk if I'll ever actually go through with talking to him about this but this isn't something I just thought of overnight. I've been feeling it for a few months now.

I wish I moved out of NY. I wasn't ready and had some shit to sort out first but I do wish we could have started our lives already. Would have been nice.

Anyway yeah. I'm getting older and I'm reflecting on my life like I'm dying tomorrow so here you go