#i've literally been formatting & fixing this for an hour now and this was supposed to be quick

[in-superbloom]

okay so. i never really did a review (feels weird to call it a review tho so let's say a very opinionated essay that's totally the opposite of what college taught me) for wfttwtaf but i never really know how to do that for any album, doesn't matter how much it makes me feel feelings, bc i simply can't write about my own emotions in cohesive thoughts ✌🏻😔

so instead, i let my brain do this thing he usually does when i listen to an album that leaves an effect on me, which is pretty much just creating visuals for the songs bc apparently my feelings translate better into images/vibes rather than words lmao but since i am unfortunately not skilled to drawn/paint/created actual visual stuff, i just wrote them so i'm gonna leave them here bc why not <3

i just really love when music (art in general, but especially music for me) makes your mind run wild & be so inspired that you can't help but create something based on that feeling <3 a great example of that is the amount of art everyone here (on tumblr!sos verse, but also tumblr & the internet in general) create based on other peoples' art & i just *clenches fists* really love that 💜

anyways !! if you're reading this, i hope this makes sense to you & if you wanna chat about the album, my mail box is always open 💜

• track one: starting line – like the mv, but he's running like he's trying to get away from something, always looking behind his shoulder, stumbling on things/people on the streets. also maybe not flying?;

• track two: saigon – then he reaches a tiny but unique/eye-catching door, gets intrigued & enters. he has to go downstairs through a dark and narrow corridor, he hears muffled music coming down there. he reaches the door & the music is now clear, it looks like there are disco balls everywhere ((pink, blue and purple bc ofc)), the place is packed with people dancing & just vibing™. he goes to the dancefloor, but soon it gets overwhelming so he tries to reach a wall or the other end of the club, but he can't. the more he walks, the furthest he feels from the walls. everything has a psychedelic look, also some of those trippy effects he used on motion, and no one seems to notice/ care about him. this goes on until the end of the song, then he finally finds a door ((not the one he came from)) and opens it;

• track three: motion – he expects to find a street, but instead he's inside a room. it's a bit dark, all he sees are shadows, but then suddenly everything turns into an explosion of colors ((when the songs picks up in the beginning)), all dancing in front of him, making him feel lost & dizzy. he keeps walking, but every now and them he stumbles on something ((random things like animals or weird props or stuff that aren't supposed to be alive, but are)). he admires everything with a childlike wonder, touches things and then they turn into something else, or change form/shape/color. in the end, he's distracted looking at something and then falls like the floor reached an end;

• track four: place in me – he fell right there where he is in the mv/visualizer, it goes on like that;

• track five: baby blue – make it look like he fell asleep after the end of place in me, so he's very confused when he wakes up & it looks like the place is falling apart, like end of the world type ((like the lamentis thingy on loki)). things are exploding & he can see another planet very close to the one where he is. it's a bit scary but it's a breathtaking view nonetheless. he's mesmerized, but also kinda already accepted his fate? he's not trying to run to find a shelter/salvation or anything, just watching it all fall apart. at the end, he stops, turns around & looks at the path that he was walking ((full of nature things colored in every shade of blue and also glittery dust)) and he's just admiring it when he's hit by a big rock maybe? or a moon, who knows;

• track six: repeat – he's throw away to somewhere that's not collapsing, it looks like a pathway in the woods? but like, no florest too near, and it's sunny but not too warm, and the path is filled with green grass and flowers. he lands in a place that looks like a field but not quite. and then after walking for a while, he finds himself, but another version of him. maybe a younger one or an older one or both? like, they both just stop and stare at each other and kinda do this lil dance of trying to touch the other & watching the other, both a lil frightened but completely intrigued. maybe the older version of him? ooooh maybe it starts with an older version, but then every time present luke gets distracted by something else or turns around for a second, the other luke is getting younger, until he's just a lil kid. the ending is the mini luke offering his hand for present luke to grab, so he can lead him to a house that was near where they were. ((or maybe mini luke makes him run after him));

• track seven: mum – luke enters the house & immediately recognizes it as the house he grew up in. every step he takes, a wall or an object or a room brings a memory & it plays it out like a hologram. lots of memories. then in the guitar solo part, he finds a guitar in the room where he used to play the most when he was a kid ((maybe some cool&cute effects going around him, representing the sound coming from the guitar)). before the solo ends, you can see a shadow in the threshold of the door, and when he finished the guitar solo, luke turns around and smiles, getting up to hug the person ((it's his mum)) but maybe you never actually see her face?;

• track eight: slip away – he steps out of his childhood house and enters this big dark room. there's only a lil blue light coming from the very center of the room. when he gets closer to it, he sees it's a lil star, who looks very scared. as soon as she notices him ((he tries to reach her)) she runs out of the door on the other side of the room. he's worried&intrigued so he follows her, but when he opens the door, he immediately falls, this time he's in what looks like the clouds ((blue hues ofc but clearer ones, not as dark shades like the ones in place in me & baby blue)), and soon he finds out he can "swim" through them. he does that for a while until he sees the lil star and tries to follow her again. this goes on until he finally gets close to her, but when he touches her, she literally slips from his grasp bc he's being teleported again ((but make it look like she's the portal));

• track nine: diamonds – it starts with a close up on the water maybe? and then the camera keeps getting higher & suddenly he falls into it and soon the camera follows. he's distorted for a bit, especially when he notices he's already too deep into the water, away from the surface. then he tries to swim to the surface, but there's a bunch of things?? or like weird and mean seapeople maybe? trying to drag him down ((kinda like that scene on harry potter & the goblet of fire)). he tries his best to fight them, but what gets him away from them is a group of nice seapeople who came to his rescue. then they all swim away from the place they were ((also maybe slip in some diamonds or things that look like them around there?));

• track ten: a beautiful dream – he reaches a lil city? under water with the help of the nice seapeople & then there's this piano on the ground ((maybe covered in seaweed and stuff like that)) and he's immediately drawn to it. he plays/sings the song ((maybe like the guitar effects in mum, the sounds coming from the piano affect the place around him even tho it looks like he barely notices it)). when the song is finishing, he notices a white light coming from the surface. he looks at it & then follows it;

• track eleven: bloodline – then he's getting out of the water? at some beach perhaps? he's slowly getting out of the water & there's this beautiful sunrise behind him. he's singing along, looking like he just came out of a battle but at the same time he's in peace with himself, looking not exactly happy but relieved. he's walking on the beach, making his way home but he's not in a hurry. then in that lil bit in the end of the song, he gets out of the frame after looking straight to the camera maybe?? and the camera focuses on the sunrise and then everything goes black;

• track twelve: comedown – he wakes up in a bed ((like, this is him waking up from all these dreams)) & he's slightly confused bc the dreams felt so real, but he's feeling better & not so lost anymore. he goes out in a walk that maybe shows every place he was in his dreams? but like, this time you see what they really are bc every place in his dreams was inspired by a real location/thing, just reimagined. but like, he doesn't enter anywhere, he's just walking & you can see the places on both sides of the street. like, it's clearly a set up location but it's just representative. maybe you can see some of his friends/family at some of these locations or maybe they're all together in one place? but they don't look at him, they're just talking&laughing with each other. he looks happy, at ease & he's smiling, wearing a yellow or gold shirt. in the end, he reaches a cliffside maybe? somewhere that leads you to think that he'll go through another portal, but then he suddenly stops, looks down at the cliffside and crouches down bc he saw the lil blue star from slip away but it's now a necklace. he picks it up, with a small&easy smile and then looks at the camera, gives a bigger, real smile, gets up and turns around, going back to where his friends&family are, but the camera stays there, just watching him go.

// now some notes bc i love to over explain myself //

• the "water" one was supposed to be slip away, but alison @bandsanitizer was talking about a beautiful dream these days & said that something about the song reminds her of a sonar-like sound & the idea of searching for something, so that got me thinking about the ocean & relating it to this song and it also makes a lot of sense with what the album represents in my mind, so it made me change that. thank you for that miss alison, it's always a pleasure to read your thoughts 😌💜

• & it also fitted well with the “i can't fight the bloodline living in the seams back home” line from bloodline, so i wanted that one to be related to the water as well bc that's all i can think about when i hear that lyric;

• something in common that appears in every single one: an object or something related to time, since it's the big common theme on the whole album;

• in each song he's wearing the same outfit he wore in the starting line mv (white tee + black pants + converse) but in each one of them, that red shirt is in a different color;

• i had the visuals from starting line to mum very clear in my head on my first listen of the album, but i only truly finished writing all of this yesterday bc i wanna listen to halsey's new album and see if my brain does this thing again, but i wanted to finish wfttwtaf first <3

& that's it bc i already talked too much for a day lmao if you read all of this, you're a true hero & i love you <3 have a nice day 💛

[idkhyuck]

Fireflies- NCT DREAM Fanfic pt1 

I couldn’t shake the happy, freeing feeling this song gave me. So here’s the result of that

Y/N Goes on a camping trip with her best friends to celebrate their last year as teenagers

DREAM OT6 !BestfriendREADER with hints of romances.No warnings other than swearing as it’s really fluffy. A/N I don’t really know the Dream Timeline too well yet so in this they’re idols and it includes things from their careers but I've kind of created my own timeline. I Kind of want to continue this if anyone likes it. Feedback is appreciated. 

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“Are you sure this is all we’ll need?” I asked looking at Jaemin and Jeno loading up our cart with a few sleeping bags. They both turned to me and nodded

“My dad’s got some stuff in the garage I can use. We can spend more money on food this way.” Jaemin said confidently as he pushed the cart down the aisle “maybe we should grab this just in case.” he said reaching for a tarp. I sighed knowing we’d end up back in this aisle before we left the store. Jeno nodded and followed behind him grabbing a few packs of the rope. and followed him, I rolled my eyes and grabbed the tent pegs they both walked passed. I’m so excited they have the weekend off. We’re going camping to celebrate our last summer being teenagers. Chenle and Jisung still had a some time left but it wouldn’t be the same without them with us so we’re bringing them along. We continued our shopping trip. I spent most of my teenage years with these boys. I stuck with them all through their trainee days after meeting in middle school, They’re my best friends and will forever have my support.

“I need swim shorts!.” Jeno said freezing in place as he turned to look for a sign to tell him where to go, he was such a lost puppy at times. I grabbed him and pointed him in the right direction. We made our way to the men’s wear section. I felt the stares of the girls that passed as they watched me walk with them. I wondered if they knew who they were or if they were just amazed at the beauty of the two of them like I am continually. I’ll probably never end up dating any of them but that didn’t stop my heart from noticing how handsome they’ve gotten over the years. I’ve literally had a legit crush on all of them at least once in the past 7 years, except Jisung he’s my baby and he hates it. the worst was Haechan at 17. They all knew except Haechan and it drove me nuts. You know when you have a crush for so long and it just grows into a content love. That’s what I have with each of them. They’ve seen me at my worst, and vice versa. We grew up together basically and at the end of this year We’d be adults. Man times flies when you’re having fun. “My mom said yes to taking her van, she’ll be here with it later.” Chenle said as he walked into the practice room throwing his bag at me in the corner.

“hey!” I yelled as the bag landed a little too close to me with a thud,

“Oh. Hi.” he said indifferently as he started stretching. Haechan sat up laughing from across the room.

“Great to see you too.” I added sourly as I pulled his bag over and laid on it. We were supposed to leave for our camping trip after practice which is why I’m here so god damn early. Renjun walked in he looked so incredibly tired.

“Renjunie. did you even sleep?” I asked him as he sat on the floor beside me

“Kind of.” he said sheepishly meaning he was up all night playing games. I sighed as he changed his shoes beside me.

“You can sleep in the van on the way out.” I said as the staff came in to the room. They were filming a dance practice today. That would be fun to watch. I had all of my things for the weekend in a backpack. Jaemin and Jisung hauled all of our camping gear in here last night. The boys went on practicing hard for a little bit. the hours flew by fast as I watched them perfect the choreo enough to film it. They started filming takes for the video. After the first take chenle came over

“Call my mom please. She can bring the van now.” he said taking a sip of water before running back into formation. I went out into the hall to make my phone call. Chenle’s mom as already on her way with the van when I reached her. I thought I’d take this time to haul our stuff to the doors so it would be easy to load up. I started with the tent, I made a few trips back and forth. The guys at varying degree of choreography each time not even noticing me coming or going. I saw one of the execs in the lobby as I carried Mine and Jisung’s bag to my growing pile.

“Those boys treating you good?” he asked me. I nodded politely bowing. “Have fun this weekend.”

“Thank you.” I said. It was still so scary knowing that everyone here knew me. I’d pass other idols in the halls and they’d greet me like any other. Most people would die to be in my position and I thought about that often. Like they’re just 6 boys that became my friends. Mark and the other NCT boys too. Mark was gone on a work trip or else he’d be here camping with us. I missed him a lot, He’s always so busy, He’s such a hard worker. We barely saw any other the other boys. We were so busy with graduation and other things. The older boys were busy with tour prep and comeback scheduling.

“Wow!” Jisung said as he saw all the stuff loaded into the van. His hair freshly showered and extra soft looking. The smell of their shampoo radiating off of them as we all loaded into van.

“FOUR DAYS OFF!” Chenle yelled as he closed the door behind him and sat beside me. All the other boys started cheering. Jaemin started the van and we pulled out as Haechan sat in the passenger seat fixing the radio with the playlist he made just for this weekend.

“We have enough food?” Renjun asked as he settled in with the cooler between him and Jisung in the back seat. I was stuck in the middle between Chenle and Jeno.

‘Yeah. Me and my mom packed it all last night.” I said “There’s all kinds of good things in there.” I added. “As long as we have a fire. We’re set.” I said

“okay.” Renjun quietly said from behind me I didn’t even have to see I could already tell he was drifting off to sleep. I looked as we passed all familiar places in Seoul. Soon enough we’d be entering the country side. It was early afternoon. The sun high and shining brightly. I couldn’t wait to be at our campsite. I’m so glad that we get to be completely off the grid, no body guards, no staff, no cameras. Although I planned on taking tons of pictures and videos of our time together. The windows being open brought in just the right amount of breeze so we weren’t hot. Jeno was playing on his phone or responding to emails, he was always working. Chenle was listening to the music playing with his eyes closed. Haechan was texting on his phone. And Jaemin quietly sung along with the radio. Jisung and Renjun were passed out in the backseat, i could hear them both snoring softly. This was already so relaxing, I felt myself getting sleepy. I yawned and laid my head back. I felt jeno’s arm wrap around me “lean on me. you’ll be sore.” He said quietly

Jeno was my first crush out of all the boys I’ve ever known. He was tallest in our grade and strong and so so handsome. I couldn’t help but feel things for him. I hated myself for it. We were really good friends, and I wasn’t the only girl that had a crush on him. I WAS the only girl that got to see the real him. the soft boy who loved games and singing and dancing and sports. He was so passionate about his work, he worked so hard to get where he is. He’s kind of goofy despite being called NoJam and I loved that side of him. He looked so tough and hot but he was so soft and that’s what got me. This was pre-debut. I struggled to hide my feelings around him because I didn’t want him or anything between us to change. Or worse they’d think I only liked him because he was going to debut. I spent a whole year crushing on him and then I saw him one night late at the studio it was just us because he was my ride home. He was very frustrated with himself, There was new choreo he couldn’t get and and he’d been working for hours and we were supposed to go hang out at the river before we had to be home but we were already late. He misstepped and fell to the floor in frustration, I ran over and saw him slump over in defeat. He was so exhausted, they’d been working non stop since their debut a few months prior. I sat on the floor beside him.

“Hey. its okay.” i said trying to keep things bright. it was when I saw the tears fall to the floor as he refused to look up at me that I knew he wasn’t okay. “Hey no, Jeno.” I said reaching out to touch his arm. “You’ll get it. You have time.” I said trying my best to reassure him. “Lets go home. You’ve worked hard.” I said as I watched the tears mix with sweat and fall off the tip of his nose. “Don’t be to hard on yourself.” I said “You’ve been working so hard, You’ve done so good. So good!” I said ‘I’ve never seen anyone work as hard as you.” I added “You should be proud of yourself and celebrating. You guys are the best rookie group out there right now. It’ll be okay.” I said reaching down to wipe his face. His eyes finally met mine and I saw how upset he really was. I immediately wrapped my arms around him and held him close, a few tears escaping me “Jeno.” I said my voice cracking “I mean it. You’re doing amazing. You don’t need to be perfect.” I said trying to keep my voice even. He was breathing hard against my shoulder “We’ll be okay.” I said “You’ve got this.” I added as I rubbed his back. He finally pulled away and started wiping his face.

“I’m sorry.” he said “I didn’t mean too here.” he said wiping at his nose gesturing around with his hand.

“No. It’s fine” I said smiling at him “It’s why I’m here.” I said “We’re best friends you can always tell me anything. I’ll always be here.” I said and in the moment I realized I meant it, I couldn’t imagine my life without Jeno in it. I woke up to Chenle pulling me out of the van, catching me as I fell out only to let me go and go running “WE’RE HERE!” He said as he ran to the other side of the campsite. it took me a second to adjust my eye sight to how bright it was. I turned and ran into Haechan, he just laughed as he slid me over to the side to start unloading. I yawned and made my way over to the back where the rest of the boys were unloading bit by bit

“Tent first.” Renjun said as he pour the contents out of our tent bag. I went over to help him. We bought the biggest tent we could find. It was an 8 person tent. Renjun and I slid the poles in. as Jisung and Jaemin set up the rest of our campsite with our chairs and our coolers and bags. I smiled at Rejun as our poles met in the middle Renjun was my second crush, it had only lasted about three months. He was helping me learn Mandarin and I longed for the time we spent together at the building when he was on breaks. It was just the two of us and I really got to know him then. I lived for the late night phone calls we shared. They’d start off as study calls and then it’d turn into him getting distracted and he’d tell me about aliens and ghosts and his theories and whatever else he was reading at the time, he was so incredibly real and honest. He was so confident in the way he carried himself even though, He was tiny, I loved his tiny features. He was almost delicate but still such a strong, handsome boy I was sure I was in love with.Then he admitted his crush on a girl in our class and my feelings for him died instantly. We all let out a sighs of relief as we settled into ours chairs, Haechan and Chenle spent the past hour setting up our fire pit with rocks and sticks and grass and leaves. We had our food and extra supplies set up in a make shift lean to with the tarps we bought. Jaemin’s dad had a bunch of chairs and sleeping bags and a cool fire starting kit. The sun was a a low place in the sky right now. it wasn’t quite twilight but everything was getting glowy. I took out my phone.

“Smile!” i yelled as I started taking pictures of them. I wanted to remember these moments forever. They all laughed pretending to hide their faces. haechan hid behind his hoodie. I stopped to focus on him. He was reaching for my phone blindly before he got up and started chasing me. We ran around the camp screaming and laughing as i took pictures of them as best as I could while running . it wasn’t long before chenle and jisung joined in trying to intercept me. It was chenle that grabbed me and wrapped his arms around me. I was giggling hysterically by now. I felt his chest heaving against my back as my own breath and heartbeat drummed in my ears. He picked me up and carried me over to the chairs, he threw me in to my chair laughing.

“Better sell those to the fansites, you’ll be rich.” he said with a laugh. I stuck my tongue out at him as I snuck one more of him

“Just when you think you escaped the cameras.” Jaemin said with a wink as he drug the cooler over.

Jaemin was the my third crush. I developed it while he was on time off. He spent as lot of time at my house because being at the dorms or at his house depressed him. He couldn’t do what he wanted to do and it was eating away at him. We’d spend hours watching movies, He’d leave for appointments only to come back for a few more hours. Usually bringing food. He trusted me with all his worries, We’d talk for hours about what his future looked like with the band and we’d cry and then we’d laugh at ourselves and eat some food. We watched and cried together as NCT dream got their first win. I honestly thought he might have liked me too. the rest of the boys would tease him about being with me all the time. We didn’t care we were having fun.it wasn’t until I went to the SM Christmas party with the boys and people started asking us if we were dating then he’d deny it. it kind of hurt me but I was just grateful to have that connection with him. to this day he’s one of my BEST friends in the world. There’s honestly no one I trust more than Jaemin, I’ll always go to him first with anything. “Of course you know how to start a fire.” I said as Chenle was hard at work starting our fire. He just turned and gave me his signature Chenle smile. I hoped to god I wasn’t blushing I was still getting over that crush on him It was the first day back at school from winter break. I hadn’t seen my friends much over the holidays so I was scanning the room for them. Specifically Renjun and Chenle, They went back to china for almost a whole month. The last time I saw either of them was at the SM christmas party. Chenle and I shared three dances that night. Jeno and I two and the rest I had to beg to dance with me at least once. I even danced with Mark and Jungwoo. I was having the time of my life. Chenle and I we’re just about to go out to the dance floor when the song changed to a slower one. I froze with his hand in mine, He just shrugged his shoulders and continued dragging me out to the dance floor. Once we got there he carefully placed his hands on my waist. it was a foreign feeling. this was my first slow dance with a boy but I’d never admit it to anyone except maybe Jaemin. I thought to myself as I enjoyed the feeling of being whisked around the dance floor. The music from some drama I never finished blasting through the speakers. I was looking around at other people dancing some of the couples I’d begun to recognize in the media were here. dancing to this song and here I am holding on to Chenle. I went to look up at him and realized I had look a bit further up.

“When did you get so tall?” I asked looking at him in the eyes as I now began to realize just how high up my arms were on his shoulders.

“I can’t be short forever.” He said pushing me out for a spin. I laughed as he pulled me into him. Why was he so good at slow dancing. Was there anything he can’t do. The song was over and he dragged me back to the table. The next day he left for china and we barely got to talk because he was busy with family. I couldn’t tell if I was developing feelings for him, it was like I was seeing him in a new light after the party and I dwelled on it the whole winter break. I was hoping he’d be here early like he usually was so we could hang out. I texted him to no avail. I felt a hand tap me scaring me as i waited in the hall

“What are you doing?” I jumped and screamed at the sound of his voice, only to turn and see he had died his hair light and that he was at least another two centimeters taller causing me to scream again causing him to jump back and lift his hands up “GOD what the hell is wrong with you?” he said “I don’t look that scary.” he added as he clutched his chest. The adrenaline running through my veins at the scare, and the sight of him caused my heart to race and i started laughing uncontrollably.  Jeno and Jaemin came over to see the commotion.

“What’d you do?” Jaemin asked Chenle as he stood there confused out of his mind

“No I’m fine.” i said “Not you.” I managed to muster between giggles “You scared me.” I said gaining composure breathless I looked up to see all three boys staring at me confused out out of their minds. I looked at Chenle and immediately felt my cheeks get hot again. I looked away before they could notice. “I was looking for you guys. I never gave you these.” I said digging out bracelets I made for them as apart of their Christmas gifts. They were green with all our initials on it. Jeno rolled his eyes as I tied it on him. Jaemin excitedly accepted his and when I got to chenle I almost dropped the bracelet as he bumped me while pulling up his sleeve. good lord I’m already awkward around him I thought to myself as i\I fumbled to tie it around his wrist. The bell rang and I bowed to them and ran off to my class before I made things worse. The last thing on my mind was the lesson we were reviewing that day from last unit.

That day at lunch I met with the rest of the guys and gave them their bracelets. Jisung and I qucikly ran to the convenience store to get food for the rest of us. When we got back we spent  the rest of our lunch hour discussing what we did over break. Renjun and Chenle distributing all the Chinese candy they brought back for us. We had fun like normal, I couldn’t help but sneak a few glances at Chenle. Jesus christ I thought I was done with this after Haechan. Speaking of Haechan he was no where to be seen because of his injury. and I missed him. I’d gone to see him at his place so many times over the break. I sent him an “I miss you” text. only to have him reply with a ugly seflie of him in bed. “If only i could be so lucky to lay in bed all day.” I replied

“Come join me then.” he replied. He didn’t mean it, he never did. That didn’t stop me from smiling like an idiot.

“Y/N! come on!! we’re gonna be late. Flirt with Haechan later!” Chenle was yelling at me from across the lunch room. I yelled at him and chased after him. He was running through the hall, I was so close to catching him when he suddenly stopped causing me to run straight into him. He caught me as I fell and placed me straight up while bowing to the teacher that passed and gave us a dirty look. I scrambled to bow quickly at her. I turned to Chenle

“You brat!” I whispered loudly while hitting his chest.

“How about I make it up to you?” He asked quietly looking around leaning in. My heart nearly jumped out of my throat. before I could even say anything he had his hand around mine and placing something in my hand closing it, while pretending to make sure no one was looking “i knew how much you loved these last time so I brought some extra for you.” He winked at me and then left. “Don’t tell the guys.” He mouthed to me as he walked into his classroom. I didn’t even realize I was holding my breath until the room started spinning. I looked down at my hand and saw a whole bag of the jelly candy i loved. I blushed as I opened one and ate it and made my way into my class. Jeno seated at his seat behind me

“You still have some?”he asked he watched me eat the candy.

“Oh. O didn’t eat mine at lunch.” i said quietly putting them in my bag and opening my books. I played with the candy wrapper for the rest of the afternoon with that sickening feeling you get when you know you’re gonna like someone. shit I didn’t want to have a crush on Chenle yet here i am already head over heels. it’ll pass it always does. I said to myself. And I continued to say that over the next six months. I said that as Jaemin and I were on the phone one night and he confronted me about it about a month and a half ago.

“So Chenle?”

“what about Chenle?” I asked him

“Why are you drooling all over him all of a sudden?” he asked

“I’m not!” i said trying to sound offended

“y/n….” he said flatly

“I KNOW! OKAY I DONT KNOW WHAT HAPPENED. HE LIKE GOT TALLER AND HE BROUGHT ME CANDY, AND HE BUYS ME LUNCH. AND HE’S GETTING SO GOOD AT DANCING AND LIKE DUDE. he’s such an amazing singer.” i said taking a deep breath “like it’s like one second he’s an annoying little brother then he’s swaying me around the floor at the Christmas party and he’s not so annoying anymore.” I said

“christmas? That’s how long this has been going on?” he asked shock in his voice

“I know.” i sighed “It’s fine. you know how I am. So shallow. It’ll pass.” I said in a light tone, but it really wasn’t anywhere near passing. I tried so hard since then to push the feelings away and it was working.

“First Haechan now Chenle. Are the rest of us not good enough.” he joked.

“Shut up.” I said. As I got over my crushes on them I made sure to make it seem like I had a crush on another guy or an idol or something so it didn’t seem like I wasn’t crushing on someone. Haechan was the first one out of them that the found out about and intended to keep it that way. “Hey uh don’t tell anyone okay?” I asked him serious

“”I won’t.” Se said I could hear the sincere smile in his voice. He then proceeded spending the next month telling me to tell chenle despite me telling him I was getting over him and I really felt like I was getting over him. I hoped this camping trip wouldn’t help that.

The campfire glowing as the sun set around us. It as absolutely perfect.

“is this what fireflies are like?” Jisung asked as he watched the embers of the flames rise and float off into the night.

“i imagine so.” Jeno said as he turned his stick over. He was currently burning his hot dogs but refused to listen when we told him to take them out. Jisung went over to the cooler and brought back marshmallows. He took a pile and tossed the bag to Jaemin. who took some, this continued until the bag got to me. I said

“Wait is this the first time for everyone?” I asked and looked around as everyone nodded “Let’s do a marshmallow toast!” I said excited grabbing my stick to put them on. I stood up ignoring their protests and watched excitedly as they all stood up reluctantly. “To being twenty.” I said sticking my marshmallow high above the fire

“to graduating.” Jeno said “to being friends.” Jaemin said earning a shove from Haechan and Jisung on either side of him. “To being friends forever.” I added “To being us!” Renjun said finally before shoving his marshmallow in the centre we all did that and roasted our marshmallows. I looked around the fire at each of them all unique in their own ways, all meaning different things to me, it made me sad, We’ll be adults next year. What if things change. I’ll be off in college all by myself while they’re enrolled online. Lord knows what the future holds for them career wise. I don’t even want to know how Jisung and Chenle feel. There’s talks of Renjun joining WayV in china. The other boys don’t know their future yet, Everything changes and all of this feels so final. I looked around at them laughing and having fun and living in the moment. The way Jaemin and Jeno fought as their marshmallows stuck together. Chenle and haechan fighting trying to knock each others marshmallows into the fire. Renjun sitting in the back eating his burnt marshmallow laughing and Jisung trying his best to roast more than one at once. They were still the same boys I met back in middle school but not at the same time. I sat back in my chair and tried my best not to cry. Haechan noticed my quietness and came over to sit beside me. I loved the way his skin glowed, I hated when he wore makeup on stage. He was so absolutely stunning and it hurt me. I had a crush on Haechan for 4 months now. It was getting worse with each day. NCT 127 had just released a new album and this all started as I watched Haechan practice his parts in studio. His voice was so angelic I literally sat there blushing the whole time he was singing. He didn’t notice, he never did. I bought that album, first album I bought myself only so I could listen to him singing on it. His parts had such an effect on me and I hated it. I thought I was doing good at hiding my crush on him. I wasn’t awkward around him. We teased non stop like always, only it was driving me nuts, and had no effect on him. We’re always cuddling or holding hands because that’s haechan, but at least it was something right. I was sitting outside during lunch on the front steps listening to my CD. 127 was doing promo so Haechan was away from school for awhile and I missed him. it was the first time he was really away from us and I was going through it. Jisung was the first to find out.

“Who are you listening to like this?” he asked pulling my headphones out as he sat down beside me with his face in his hands and batting his eyes  

“I’m not like that.” i said shoving him

“Like what?” Jaemin said sitting on the other side of me.

“She’s in love with someone.” He said reaching for my old CD player I got from my mom. as I pulled away from him Renjun came from behind and grabbed it.

“Give it back.” i whined. looking up at him to no avail he opened it

“Oh my god 127 hyungs!” he said with a gasp. all the boys looked at me “It is johnny?” Jisung asked “i bet its johnny.”

“No it’s Taeyong.” Rejun said said

“Is it Jungwoo? He’s your type” Jeno asked as he sat beside Jisung. they continued this game as I denied all of them.

“Ten hyung!” Jisung said beside me

“NOOO” i said annoyed with them

“Then who? Renjun asked confused “the only one we didn’t name was…” they suddenly all yelled “HAECHANNIE!” “Arghhh! ” I said beyond annoyed with them  

“Oh my god it is.” Jisung said hanging his head with disbelief. Renjun tsked as he handed me back my CD player. I sighed as Jaemin looked at me trying to get an answer.

“What’d I miss?” chenle asked as he approached us out of breath. We all looked up at him. then they all started talking all at once telling various versions of what just happened. Chenle choked on his drink

“Haechan?!” he asked “Why?!” he was the first person to ask anything. “I don’t know.” I said still annoyed with them. “Ah, you should have seen her sitting there.” Jisung said as I shot him a dirty look. “Are you going to tell him?” Jaemin asked a concerned look on his face and I could tell why, he was just as scared as I was of things changing

“Noooo. God no. He can never know.” I said panicking “Why?” renjun asked “Because it’ll make things weird and like it’s just a stupid crush anyway. I’ll get over it.” i said matter of factly. I didn’t get over it for a whole year… He was just so handsome and he seemed so more mature compared to the rest of the boys. He wasn’t and still isn’t but like The fact that he was out in the world touring and working on music and like he just seemed like he was on a different level then the rest of us here. Like he was still the same old haechannie who liked to tease me but like I just saw him differently and he was so incredibly untouchable it hurt. Like I think it’s his passion that drew me in. He practiced so hard, He worked on his singing so hard. Watching him at a piano was a treat. I still love him and would date him in the drop of a hat to be honest but like I know he doesn’t see me that way, I’m still the same ol me to him and I don’t think that will ever changed and that’s how I eventually got over him enough to be here normally. The boys didn’t help either. They’d constantly tease me about it behind his back I’m honestly surprised he never found out. “What’s wrong Y/N?” Haechan asked sitting down beside me

“I’m just thinking.” i said hoping to keep my voice even.

“About?” Jaemin asked from across the fire.

“Life.” i said my voice sounding smaller than I wanted it to. I now had all their attention. “Ah shit. Here we go.” i said looking down “We’re almost adults. 20 years old in 6 months. doesn’t that scare you?” I asked “not just at work but here. and in real life too. I get anxiety thinking about what will happen to you guys at work honestly. We barely see mark.” I said “And like it’s just all gonna change.” I said my voice finally cracking I looked down as my eyes welled up “I’m so grateful to know you guys as stupid as you are.” I said trying to laugh. “We’re so lucky to have met how we did because I honestly can’t imagine my life with out you guys and idk if you feel that same way or I’m just some dumb girl but like you’re all gonna be there when I get married and I hope when I have kids and like I just want to be friends forever. and I don’t want to lose you guys.” I turned to Renjun “I don’t want to lose you.” he knew what I meant and I was full on crying at this point “Not yet anyway.” I sighed in my seat and I looked up at all of them. They were all so quiet and somber I thought I had ruined the trip  then Haechan spoke up

“We’ll always be friends no matter what.” he said and all the others nodded. He said it with such a finality that he didn’t need to say anything else. It was when I looked around and saw each of them looking at me with concern and worry that I knew. They really did care for me.

“lets have some more marshmallows.” i laughed “I’m sorry.” i said wiping my nose with my hoodie sleeve

“No. it’s understandable.” Jeno said “We’ve been so busy. life catches up with you.”

“let’s play truth or dare!” Jisung said hating all the sad stuff. i smiled a knowing smile at him and nodded

“Yeah!” i said. We all stood up again and played rock paper scissors to decide who would go first. Jisung would go first and we’d go around the circle asking to our left. Renjun chose truth so Jisung asked him

“what’s one thing you can’t live without?”

“easy. Headphones.” Renjun replied quickly “truth or dare?” he asked Jaemin who said Dare “I dare you to do karaoke for us. one song WE PICK.” He said motioning for Haechan to come over with his phone and speaker.

“Argh not this one!” Jaemin said as the most popular song in korea rn started playing “I’ve heard it a thousand times.”

“sing! or we’ll throw you in the lake!” Jeno said as the song started into the melody we’d all heard at least 1000 times. Jaemin started singing his voice cracking here and there because it wasn’t in his key. The guys laughing at him as he turned various shades of pink. it was a sexy song and he hated it

“choreo! come on!” rejun said as the chorus started soon enough they were all up dancing various stages of the song.

“you guys are a mess.” i said in between laughing. the song came to an end and they all sat down. “Thanks for the show.” i laughed. they all threw marshmallows at me. “okay next.”

“Jeno! truth or Dare?” Jaemin yelled as he opened his water.

“truth.” Jeno said

“Favourite idol you’ve met.” Jaemin asked

“EXO hyungs.” Jeno said easily

“boring.” chenle asked “I pick truth.” He said taking a bite of a hotdog he had cooked himself

“Favorite place we’ve been so far.” he asked stiffling a yawn

“Brazil.” he said “truth or dare?” he said turning to me.

“truth.” i said pondering how bad it could be they were doing easy questions i should be safe

“first crush.” Chenle said i wasn’t safe.

“um. like first first crush? or first real crush?” I asked

“first real crush.” he said “we all know about you’re crush on Goku.” he said rolling his eyes

“hmmm.” i said pretending to think while looking across the fire at Jeno .”No names BUT we were 15.” I said looking away from Jeno as our eyes met i could tell he knew immediately. “First time I’d ever noticed a boy in this way that was my age. wanna guess?” I said looking around at the boys as they all have puzzled looked on their faces.

“We met already?” Renjun asked

“yup, you guys were in training. He was the only boy in our grade that was this tall and handsome.” i said looking down as I could practically all hear them whip their heads towards Jeno.”it was short lived but this boy will forever remain as the boy I liked first.

“Is he still as handsome?” Jeno asked looking at me from across the fire with a small smile, i could feel the rest of the boys eyes peering into me.

“Other girls seem to think so.” i said smiling back at him. Haechan laughed beside me

“AWWW! LITTLE Y/N’s FIRST CRUSH IS JENO!” He said roaring with laughter, which caused all the other boys to start laughing.

“WHAT?! i wasn’t the only one to crush on him that year!” i said defending myself “not my fault the rest of you refused to go through puberty.” i said they all took that so well. I was kind of shocked

“Hey! my voice was dropping already.” Jisung said defensively

“it’s still dropping!” I said to him “girls go crazy for it online.” i said “if they only knew what a baby you are.” i said laughing. He shot me a dirty look. “Okay if you are all done.” i said turning to Haechan

“Dare.” he said looking me in the eye.

“I dare you to finish that bottle of juice in 30 seconds.” i said pointing to the full bottle beside him

“Easy.” he said picking it up “timer!” he said

“Go!” Jisung said. We all watched as he chugged the juice quickly “he’s done that before.” Jisung said as he watched. He finished the bottle with 7 seconds left and wiped his lips while looking at me

“Told you.” he said. I sat there pouting. The game went on for two hours. We had tons of fun. Chenle made me do their choreo in front of everyone while they filmed it. I wanted to die. We all sat around the campfire just talking about the past school year and how much fun we had. Jeno yawned first.

“we should go to bed.” i said stretching my legs out. “How are we all sleeping?” I  asked standing up a shiver went down my spine as the wind brushed my hair across my neck. “it’s getting chilly.” I said I went over to my bag and dug out my comfy clothes. sweats and a long t-shirt.”I’m changing in the tent!” I said running into our tent. I could hear then all fumbling around outside the tent, yelling at each other, beating each other up from the sounds of things.

“y/n hurry upppp.” Haechan whined from just outside the tent pulling at the zipper.

“Stop it! or you’re all sleeping outside.” i said as I slipped into my sweats. I changed from my real bra to my sports bra and slipped my shirt over. I sat down and washed up my face.

“What are you doing??” Jisung asked

“Washing up.” I said as I went over my forehead a few times.

“Washing up on a camping trip.” Jeno said flatly.

“Don’t come for me when you’re all breaking out when we get back.” I said as I packed up my things “Come in.” I said shoving my bag in the corner. The zipper  opened they’re all came piling in carrying sleeping bags and pillows and blankets. They were all kind of hunched over and bumping into each other shoving and i’m backed against the back wall of the tent “GUYS! wait!” everyone back out!” they all practically fell out of the tent I followed suit and grabbed my sleeping bag and pillow from the pile they abandoned it in. I looked at them all varying stages of bickering with each other.

“Oldest to youngest.” Renjun said.

“Fine.” Jaemin said knowing he had a chance at a good spot being fourth, the rest of us all groaned and nodded in agreement. My birthday was in November.so I was third last. This was my first time sleeping over with all of them. over the years i’d spend the night at one of their houses or one of them mine but never all of us at once. I sometimes wonder what other stuff I missed out on having no girlfriends I grabbed my headphones and my blanket. I was waiting. Renjun went into the tent first and set up his bed along the back wall.

“HEY! wait!” I  said as Jeno started walking into the tent! “There’s enough room for me to sleep along that back wall too. Renjun and I Horizontal and the rest of you guys spread out vertical along us.” I said looking at all of them hopeful “look at you guys if any of you try and fit there it’ll never work.” I said gesturing at how tall they were. “Renjun is JUST short enough that I’ll fit and it’ll create more room!”

“wow! she’s a genius!” Jaemin said as he looked at the room they’d all have. they all nodded and i made my way into the tent. I rolled out my sleeping bag and sat on it. the rest started coming in and rolling out their things. Jaemin and Chenle slept on myside. Jeno and Haechan on Renjun’s side and Jisung planted himself straight in the middle. “I can’t believe it.” Jaemin said laying down starfishing on his sleeping bag “so much room.”

“We don’t get to cuddle.” I said pretending to sound sad.

“What are you talking about. i’m gonna cuddle Jeno all night.” i heard Haechan say from the other side of the tent.

“YOU BETTER NOT!” Jeno said. and then they started fighting. At least I think, my eyes were closed i was so comfy.it was warm in the tent, it was really getting cold outside. “First to sleep has to build the fire and cook in the morning.” Renjun announced as he sat up and took out a deck of cards. We started our uno Marathon. It was already kind of late. The first few rounds were fun and exciting, then I started losing and getting tired.

“Look! y/n’s getting sleepy.” Jeno teased as I dozed off.

“I’m not.” I whined opening my eyes.

“I can go all night.” Haechan said excitedly

“We know!” we all said in varying stages of annoyance. Haechan was really a work of science, the boy barely slept and was still so energetic.

“I’ll have that food ready when you guys get up.” I said grumpily as I slid back into my corner of the tent. I faced towards the window so the glow of the lantern we had on wasn’t as bright. I put on my headphones and fell asleep listening to my favourite songs. I woke the next morning to see the sunlight coming through the crack in the window cover. I blindly rolled over and let my eyes adjust to the glow. I saw Jaemin sleeping right in front of me, at least I think it was jaemin, his head was covered. I looked and saw jisung beside him rolled up like a burrito and down to see chenle all spread out half off his sleeping bag. I heard Renjun lightly snoring above me. I couldn’t see where jeno and Haechan ended up. I reached around for my phone it was around 10. Perfect time to get up on a day off I thought. I tried my best to quietly get up, I was actually so warm in that tent. The sun shining warmed everything up. I quietly made my way out of the tent trying really hard not to step on anyone. I saw a glimpse of Jeno and Haechan in the back corner of the tent. Haechan clinging onto jeno for dear life. I couldn’t help the giggle the escaped. Jeno would die if he knew. I went and dug a bottle of water out of the cooler, I chugged half of it and started digging for our food. I took out the eggs, and instant rice we bought. I grabbed the kettle and filled it with some of our water. I walked back over to the fire and wondered how I would start it. I saw chenle doing it last night but did he make the sticks a certain way, did he use a match? why did he need that paper? I sat down on a chair trying to think back to how he did it. I heard rustling in the tent then as if on cue Chenle popped his head out and sleepily made his way over to our bathroom bushes. I waited for him to come back 

“You going back to bed?” I asked him as he sleepily approached me 

“Nah I’m up.” he said walking over to me, his morning voice something I’ve never heard before. 

“Good.” I said. “I need help.” I said looking up at him batting my eyes holding the matches out to him. he laughed as he took them. 

“You wanna learn?” He asked as he crouched down rubbing his eyes with one hand sliding the matches out of the box with the other, He pushed up his hoodie sleeves I noticed the bracelet I gave him at christmas still tied on his wrist. I nodded then crouched down beside him. “okay.” he said clearing his throat. “First we make the wood pile nothing too crazy, just enough to burn for a while. He said “then we take something small to burn first. In this case.” He said holding up the newspaper i had brought along “it’s paper, you take a small bit of this and then crumple it so then you light it and throw it into the smaller sticks underneath and then slowly the rest of the wood catches fire.” he said as he lit the newspaper.and threw it in. Sure enough there was smoke and small flames growing. 

“Wow.” I said and he turned to me and smiled. “Thank you.” I said he nodded then sat on the chair behind him. I stood up, I went over to get him a water bottle. I brought it back to him he looked up at me thankfully. he opened it and chugged all of it. “thirsty?” I asked he nodded. He was so sweet when it was just the two of us. I loved that he was this comfortable around me to let his little guard down. He’s told me all of his worries in the past. stuff only Jisung and I would probably ever know. He wasn’t just a spoiled rich kid. He lets people believe that about him sometimes. “It’s easier that way.” he said to me. He’s so incredibly passionate about everything he does but it seems like it all comes easy to him. Every one goes on about Haechan’s sunny demeanor but no one ever notices Chenle’s. I used to wonder it if was an act for him to be this happy and fun all the time. Then I realized he really loves what he does and who hes with. He wears his heart on his sleeve. These are all the things I’ve loved and will continue to love about him once I get over my phyisical attraction to him. don’t even get me started on that. I looked over at him as the fire grew before us. His hair catching the light just right, His face a little puffy from sleeping but that just made him cuter. his facial features delicate in a way. The way his hoodie hung on him slightly as it was too big for his growing frame. His little sweater paws. i smiled. He looked over at me 

“What?” He asked with a shy smile looking away 

“Nothing.” I said “You’re just a cutie.” I added teasing him. he blushed ten shades deep and looked away swatting his hand at me. I laughed “Thank you for the fire. i would have never done it.” I admitted 

“It’s no problem.” he said “I learned years ago.” He laughed as he thought back “my mom wanted me to know. you’re wife will thank you later in life.” she would tell me.” He laughed looking up at me through his eyelashes 

“lets’ hope your wife is as good a chef as me.” I said teasingly and he blushed again. He was so fun to tease. I went over to my pile of food and started getting it ready. I put the kettle on the fire and took out a frying pan. I started scrambling the egg’s in a big bowl. “you think they’ll get up anytime soon?” I asked him, he shrugged “this is enough for the two of us?” I asked him holding my bowl. He nodded. I poured them into the pan and cooked them til they were perfect. As if on cue the kettle slowly started it’s crescendo into screaming but Chenle stopped it before it could go full volume. i smiled a thanks at him. I took the eggs off and put them onto a paper plate. I Then opened two rice cups and poured the water in. I put the kettle off to the side.

“I’m starving” He said as we waited for the Rice to cook. I separated our eggs and got us cups of juice. Chenle and I sat beside each other sharing a small table between us. “let’s eat.” He said holding up his rice cup to me then digging in. It was so peaceful, the birds we’re chirping, The sun was shining but not beating down on us too hard that it was unbearable. The fresh air now mixed with the smell of our food. I looked up at Chenle between bites as he ate his food.”this is so good.” He said smiling at me. We slowly started talking about what he plans to do next time he goes to china, We talked about how much fun it would be if we all went out with him. He told me of all the places he wanted to show me. It was honestly so much fun just sitting and talking with him, He lit up when he talked about things he loved and that made me happy. I forgot it wasn’t a camping trip with just the two of us until Jaemin was suddenly behind Chenle. 

“Morning.” he smiled at me a huge smile and thumbs up from behind Chenle 

“Morning.” I said looking down

“Anything left for me?” He asked looking at our empty containers

“Yeah. coming right up.” I said, getting up to gather my cooking items. So much time had passed I put the kettle back on 

“I wasn’t interrupting was I?” he asked sitting down across from us pointing between Chenle and I yawning.

“we finished awhile ago.” I said trying to discreetly give him a dirty look. 

“Ah.” he said sitting back as Chenle tossed him a water bottle. I cooked him a bunch of scrambled eggs and let the kettle scream this time so everyone could wake up. After I took it off I heard a bunch of grumbling coming from the tent. I couldn’t help but laugh as one by one they all crawled out of the tent. 

“So are we swimming today?” Jisung asked excitedly as he ate.

“Yeah!” renjun said “The lake isn’t far from here.” 

“okay. Eat up then we’ll go.” I said. I had been saving a two piece suit forever, I always wore a one piece around them and they wore t-shirts too but i was almost an adult now I could wear what i wanted. I was too scared to wear it in actual public. “You guys go to the lake and change there i’ll come after.” I said as they all finished eating “I’ll clean up then meet you in like 15.” they all nodded and and gathered their things I could hear their banter slowly fade as I cleaned up all of our breakfast. I threw some water on the fire and went to change in the tent. I wasn’t as revealing as I had previously thought. The bottoms were almost shorts and the top was almost like a sports bra but it had cute little lacing up the middle. it would be perfect for the lake. I grabbed my towel and wrapped it around me, I felt self conscious as the breeze his all my exposed skin. I grabbed Haechan’s speaker and some bottles of water and made my way in the direction they had left. I  wasn’t walking long before I could hear them all playing around screaming. I walked closer and closer to the sound then I finally smelled the freshness of the lake. I could see it in the distance all of their heads floating around. 

“HEY!” I yelled out. they all turned and waved, only their heads poking out. I waved back “is it cold?” U asked 

“No! Just get in here!” Haechan said. I put my things down and laid my towel out. I turned to see all of them staring at me. Different unreadable expressions Jisung looking down and anywhere but at me, I sighed, Teenage boys. of all times for them to notice me it’s now. 

“You bought that when we went to the mall?” Jeno asked confused

“No” i said making way towards the water and jumping in “I’ve had this for years.” I said popping up and pushing my hair back “I’ve been too scared to wear it but it’s just us.” I said 

“In that case.” Jaemin said making his way to the shore. He got out to about his knees then flung the t-shirt the clung to him off and made his way back in 

“He didn’t want to make you uncomfortable.” Jisung said floating on his back

”Jaemin make me uncomfortable?” I laughed as he came over and shoved me over. I splashed him back but ended up hitting Haechan behind the head he then came over and shoved me under the water. I came back out and then we started chasing each other all over the water. We played around for a few hours before I was exhausted and needed a drink. I went over to the shore and laid out my towel. I sat on it bringing my knees close to my chest as I drank some water. I looked out at the boys. Chenle and jisung  and Haechan we’re still playing with each other. Renjun was floating around living his best life and Jaemin and Jeno made their way towards me. 

“You brought the speaker!” Jeno said excitedly as he sat beside me splashing me in the process. I protested and shoved him over as he shook his hair at me. “Give me your phone!” he said as he fiddled around with the speaker. it wasn’t long before he had songs playing on the speaker for all to hear. They all turned in our direction and started making their way over to us. It wasn’t long before we were all laying on the lake shore, music blasting, The shade of the tree above protecting us from the hot sun that shone down.We lazed around on the shore all afternoon. It was late afternoon, We should be heading back for food sooner or later. I sat up 

“Anyone hungry?” i asked. They all said no. 

“i want to go back in the water, We should have brought a ball or something.” Jisung said. as they all agreed in varying stages of laziness. 

“Lets go then!” I said standing up and running into the water. Jisung followed suit. the were a few rocks so we were chasing each other back and forth to those seeing who could swim faster then that brought everyone else into the water. I washed away all of my impending worries in those moments. Living in the moment as the summer faded around us. Times I will remember for the rest of my life. The smiles of each of these boys that mean the world to me. The time where all we had was each other and we knew we’d be okay. I sat up on a rock and looked out at them. The same boys i knew at 14 now almost adults. So much we’ve been through but so much to go through yet. So many feelings and experiences to explore. So much life to live and i’m grateful to live it with them.