#idk i got lost in this one and then the momentum died

[psychospore]

A Second Chance

This has been sitting in my WIP pile for a while but I've finally finished writing this!

I do hope you enjoy the sequel to In Another Life inspired by @just-someone11 comment

Ok listen i knew it would be angst. I pushed back reading this knowing it would be angst but still :((((((. wonderfully written and if you find the inspiration maybe you could write Loki meeting y/n in the new life? Idk maybe as tom and yn.....oh oh oh or after Loki dies, so more reuniting in the afterlife

If you like more, check out my Masterlist

Summary: An alternate life brings you and Loki together, along with it is the realization that whatever timeline you may be - you are both connected to each other

Warnings: Angst, mentions of death, fluff, multiverse stuff,

You've always hated winter - maybe it's the numbing cold that you had to endure every time you have to go out or the fact that everything around you is devoid of color because of the accumulating snow.

This time around, you despised it because you had to walk home into the blizzard under heavy layers of clothing after covering an extra shift for your co-worker who caught the flu in this weather.

You buried your hands inside the fluffy pockets of your coat and hid your face under your scarf to shield you.

Loki and Thor ran through the snow-covered streets of New York chasing after the remaining HYDRA super soldier that stole a rune dagger made from the stinger of a creature from Jotunheim. The same creature in the stories guards the powerful orb. Both are directly connected to each other and have the ability to link the minds of the person's variants, accessing the past, present, and future of one's self in different multiverses. HYDRA was supposed to use the dagger to learn how to unlock this knowledge on Earth, as everything connected to it has been long lost in Asgard. The soldier was almost successful in getting away after fending off Thor and Loki by spreading nerve gas and creating chaos along the way.

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As you were lost in your thoughts, you noticed people around you starting to scramble and run away. You tried assessing the situation and noticed that a super soldier was headed in your direction. You made sure that the people were safe before stepping in and blocking the super soldier. He triggered an unpleasant piece of memory you tried to bury deep in your subconscious.

He ran straight at you, but you were able to use his momentum to throw him straight to the ground and drop an axe kick to his gut before punching him square in the face for good measure, knocking him senseless with a few broken bones.

Before starting your new life as an EMT in New York, you were secretly trained to become an assassin for years by your HYDRA captors after they discovered you were frozen in a lake in Antarctica. You exhibited great fighting skills, exceeding super soldiers even without using the serum, despite lacking any hint of memory prior to being captured. They tried experimenting on you way too many times to discover what you are or where you're from—the best they could come up with was that you were not from Earth.

You were staring down at the unconscious soldier beneath you when your scarf flew away. You scrambled to catch it, but someone got to it first. You looked at the person, and your heart pounded like a battering ram against your chest. You took the scarf and meekly said thanks, but your eyes were locked against each other.

For years, you were their best hit person, until one night you were tasked with dispatching the scientist who's been taking care of you since you arrived at the facility, as she was discovered to be a spy for SHIELD. In her dying breath, she urged you to discover who you truly were and not what HYDRA just wanted you to be. It made you run away to start a new life and be who you are now. Maybe in this new life, you could save lives instead of taking them away.

"Isn't that…" Thor whispered to Loki.

"Y/N?" Loki said as he looked at you intently, etching your very being in his mind.

"Oh no, I'm not y/n. You must have gotten the wrong person."

Nobody had ever called you y/n before but it felt like it always has when Loki says it. It felt like your name was y/n all this time, despite this being your first time hearing it. Was it even the first time?

You got lost in your thoughts when a familiar, searing heat ran through your back. Thor was quick to disarm the now-conscious soldier when he found out he used the rune dagger to stab you. Loki caught you in his arms before you started convulsing.

Memories of all of yourselves flashed before your eyes—what was, what is, and what will be all flashing before you, even your lost memory. You saw the timeline where both you and Loki died after you tried obtaining the orb by Odin's orders. You saw how you fought and defeated the creature in a different universe, with you dying before Loki could get to you and him dying in grief because of your death, encased in permafrost in Jotunheim.

There was also a brighter alternate reality where Loki was a famous actor going by the name of Tom, and there was you—a young scientist working at his grandfather's company. You caught his eye when he came there for a visit, and everything started when he invited you for a cup of coffee. You ended up marrying him and having a daughter together. It was perfect how you welcome him with a kiss every time he comes home from work and your daughter rushes to be carried in her father's arms.

You saw your own past in this universe before you arrived on Earth, Loki was about to confess his love for you when you arrived from one of your battles, and you were about to too, but Odin did not like that, so before you both could, he sent you away to obtain the orb in exchange for his blessing.

In this timeline, Loki thought you knew about his intention and you decided to run away, so he did not pursue you any further, but the reality was that, instead of facing the creature, Laufey found you first and fought against you. Your prowess and resilience made him admire you as a warrior. Instead of killing you, he ended up wiping all of your memory using the orb and banishing you to Midgard, where you were encased in permafrost, which HYDRA discovered.

It felt like forever processing everything all at once, but Loki held you tightly in his arms to protect you from hurting yourself as tears flooded your eyes. You passed out in his arms shortly after. One thing is for sure, in every timeline - you are connected to Loki by the red string of fate.

"What do you intend to do, brother, with the dagger and with her?" Thor asked, handing him the dagger and glancing at you.

Loki took the dagger and used his seidr to vanish it away. "We need to get to the bottom of this. But for now, I need to protect y/n, more than ever. I can't bear to lose her again, brother. We are bringing her to the tower for now; then we must head to Asgard." He spoke as he looked at you. He tucked in the stray hair covering your face behind your ears to take a closer look—you are indeed his y/n, the love of his life.

There are a million things running through his mind right now, but seeing you, he knew he had found a part of him that he tried to lock away when you were gone, a part that loved you and connected both of you against time, space, and all of the multiverse. He swore secretly to himself that he wouldn't lose you again—not in this timeline at least.

[melrosing]

What were your thoughts on jaime when you first started the series? I know for a lot of people, me included, he comes off as a major asshole in agot. And then that all changes in asos. I watched the show first and I still didn’t like the book version of him until his cat chapters in acok and then his in asos.

Well I was a show watcher first (I caught up just before S4 started airing) and in the show I can’t lie he didn’t make a huge impression for me lol. I think he just lacked much gravity onscreen, and D&D low-key spoiled the whole Kingslayer reveal by having Jaime reveal to Robert halfway through S1 that Aerys died crying ‘burn them all’. So by that point you already know what Jaime’s big secret is and that he’ll basically tell anyone who’ll listen lmao, and then there’s the random cousin killing and blah blah blah idk he didn’t seem that grey, just a villain who’d at one point done the only reasonable thing left to do (murder Aerys). By the time I got to the Jaime & Brienne roadtrip I was intrigued, like ok did I miss something is there more to this guy?? but then season 4 wheels around and all momentum is quickly lost in Jaime’s arc.

Then when S4 was over I read the books…. and I remember enjoying all the extra detail but if I’m honest I was studying for my English lit degree at the time and I was constantly having to switch to the dozens of course texts and in the end I think it took me my full three years to read asoiaf lmao and I was so distracted by student life that most of it went over my head lol and I was barely engaging w any kind of fandom at the time so. I just forgot about em

Then. Jaime finally leaves KL in the show and something awakened in me like ‘wait hang on is this arc finally moving again?’ I’d seen around S3 that his story COULD go somewhere interesting but ultimately I’d zoned out because for years the show had sapped all the promise from it. But stupidly I was now thinking hang on they’re finally gonna do something w this character, the promising arc they cut off years ago was moving again!! And suddenly I was excited about Jaime Lannister!!!

Aaaaand then show Jaime falls flat on his fucking face and I thought okay where the fuck did I get the feeling this story was going somewhere bc in hindsight the show has failed him at every turn. Then I reread the books and realised OH I remember THIS is Jaime. and now here I am I guess but basically yeah no I don’t recall any particular first impressions just a… series of impressions

[opheliarot]

Oddities

My heart is an oddities shop: I store fragments of other people inside myself, taking in small handfuls. I collect almost-lovers and tuck pieces of their hearts away in glass jars, tie them together with ribbons and strings of pearls, leave them on shelves to collect dust and float in the formaldehyde of bad memories. I have his letters, her photos, ???

and none of it has ever quite been right, all oddly misshapen, just slightly malformed. Abnormal, oddities. Her music never quite matched my tempo; his words never quite painted an image of the core of me; and when they touched me, it was always fumbling, always desperate, always selfish. Everything my hands took, they clawed back threefold. I carry these things and they turn my body into a shadow box. There’s a glass casing over his hand-print on my hip, a moth mounted in the cavity of my mouth where she kissed me, pins in the palms of my hands keeping me on display.

[youmarin]

Coastal Hikes | JJ Maybank Blurb

A/N: I shouldn't be writing rn but heeey. Didn't really proofread so sorry about that if my English got fucked up somewhere. Inspired by the place I went to yesterday (only that I didn't have a JJ. Added some of the photos I took to help you immerse in the story). Also I sometimes write dialogue between the pogues and don't specify who's speaking just for you to figure it out. I mean I hope I'm doing a good job on that lol. Is this really blurb or do you call it imagine or whatever other name? Idk either but you can either see it as being connected to the fic (though it would be way forward in the story), or not. It doesn't really matter. Enjoy this little piece and until next time. ~Y♡

Summary: JJ takes you on a date and gives you surfing lessons, you go hiking and then have a nice day at the beach just the two of you. (me encanta el resumen pfff).

Relationships: JJ Maybank x reader, pogues x reader (platonic)

Word count: 1.2K (honestly I thought it' would be half of this at least).

JJ and you had gone to the beach on a date. The waves were perfect for surfing, and he had insisted on teaching you how to do it.

“I can’t believe you lived on an island, moved to another island and you still haven’t learned.” , he said, making you roll your eyes.

First, he had explained to you the correct posture, and had done a little demonstration while you observed sitting on your board (it was his too, if you liked it he’ll definitely give you one). He made it look so easy as he approached the wave and stood up on his board, riding it effortlessly.

You had seen him surf before, but still admired how he kept going until the wave crashed and the momentum died down. John B had said it, he was the best.

“You saw that?” he exclaimed happily, proud of his skill. You nodded with a sweet smile. That was until you remembered it was your turn now. “Try to get the next one.”

From a reasonable distance, he watched attentively as you tried to follow what he did earlier. He cheered in encouragement as you both got up on your boards.

5 seconds and you toppled over, coming up to the surface gasping for air, your board floating near you. Just in time to see JJ get down of his and swim towards you to check if you were okay.

That happened nearly every time. JJ couldn’t help but laugh at your frustrated expression. It didn’t matter if you liked it or not, he knew you would try your best. “Don’t feel bad, baby. You’ve been doing it very well." He kissed your forehead. “Do you want to stop?”

After a while, you both got out of the water. You had brought food and drinks so you got where you had left your things and sat down.

“You wanna go for a walk?” He proposed as he stood up from his position sitting in between your legs.

You took the hand he offered to you and got up.

“JJ, where the hell are we going?” You said after approximately twenty minutes walking. You weren’t walking near the water anymore. You had followed a trail some feet away, a difficult one with tree roots and stones, so you had to watch your step and your head from hitting the lower branches. It started to go up, and you could see giant boulders below near the coast, turquoise water in constant motion.

“There’s another beach on the other side and I heard there's like this secret spot.” You wondered how he learned the secret.

Twenty minutes turned into nearly an hour, and you still hadn’t found the place JJ talked to you about. But you had stopped a few times when the trail dipped down again towards the water, swimming and taking pictures.

“I know it’s around here.” He said very sure of himself. You thought about what the other pogues would’ve said to him, or to you for enabling him. You just hoped you didn’t get lost because your phone coverage was long gone, not even the lowest bar showing.

At first when you grabbed your bag he had told you to leave it back but now when he asked you for a water bottle with an innocent smile, seeing your I told you face, he was glad you didn’t do it.

Well, he knew about the place, he just didn’t know how far it was. And just as he started worrying that maybe this was a bad idea and that you probably were hating this date, you reached some stairs.

The way from there on was easier and when you got to the highest point, you took in the scenery. In front of you, down below, you could see the beach, and then endless blue as the ocean stretched away. “It’s beautiful, JJ.” he smiled as he saw your awed face. You leaned your head against him as he wrapped an arm around you.

As you got back, you two went for a promenade along the beach and after some time you decided it was time to go.

When you got back to the Château, you were greeted by John B, “Welcome back, lovebirds.”, who instantly held out his hand waiting for JJ to give back the keys of his van as JJ assured him he didn’t leave a scratch on it. JJ was a good driver, he just didn’t take speed limits seriously. But he was with you so he made sure to be more careful.

“How was your date?”

“You want the scoop so you can go gossip with Kie and Pope later?” JJ told him and John B shrugged, unable to deny it.

“As your best friend I should be the first to hear about it.” He proceeded to tell you both that sure enough, Kie and Pope would show up anytime now.

When you both had showered, you went outside, where John B and Pope were starting a bonfire and Kie walked up to you, greeting you both.

You ate, drank and after a while you and JJ moved to lay on a hammock.

You were snuggled beside him and so it was way more inevitable to miss that something was on his mind.

“You’re very quiet tonight.” You noticed, lifting your head from his chest as you moved to look up at him.

“Miss the sound of my voice?”

“Right, that was it.” you said sarcastically, though you knew he could talk about whatever and no matter if you didn’t really understand what he was talking about you loved listening to him. “Is something wrong?” You asked, being serious now. He stirred the now empty bottle in his hand and sighed.

“It’s just that we spent today doing things that I like and I should’ve thought more about you because maybe you weren’t having fun.” He admitted as he kept avoiding your gaze.

“Is that it?” He nodded. “JJ, I loved it. I got an entire day to spend with you and you shared the things you like with me.” You kissed him, making him finally turn to look at you. He was flustered, but it went unnoticed by you, the orange glow that the fire casted over his face and golden hair making him shine in the darkness of the night. Seeing that smile that reached his eyes made him look even more bright and more handsome than you thought possible. God, you were down bad for him and he still doubted sometimes.

He said nothing but instead chose to kiss you back, hoping he could convey all that he was feeling. He was about to tell you that he loved you right there.

“You two, get a room.” John B broke the moment and your little bubble, making you and JJ laugh, as the latter gave him a middle finger.

“That’s envy speaking. If Sarah was here you wouldn’t even notice us.”

You all kept chatting the night away, and a few moments later, sleep started to take over you. You tried to shake it off but after talking with JJ a little longer you couldn’t fight it anymore. He kissed the top of your head.

“You two are so cute it’s disgusting.”

“I know. We’re cute as hell.”

“And now you ruined it.”

“Are you going to tell us about your date? I mean, not even John B has mentioned anything.”

JJ started retelling the events of the day to his friends, avoiding to gesture too much as he spoke to not bother you. He knew you were a heavy sleeper and they’ll need another hurricane to wake you up but still he told his friends to keep their voices down. He even showed them the pictures you took together.

[sapphire-innit]

MD is a trip in SO many ways lmao

HI!! So it's been a while but I was feeling sad about some minecraft boys and it finally kickstarted me enough energy to do this again. For those who haven’t seen this before everything is tagged “dream smp liveblog” if you wanna look back.

I was thinking about rewatching some of the exile vods again to get back into the right headspace but honestly I’m gonna ride this wave while I can and jump right back into it. Maybe when I catch up fully I’ll go back and watch them all in a marathon and see how much I can make myself cry, who knows

Intro out of the way here we go! VOD: Tommy Speaks to Mexican Dream in Exile

(rp): oh man I forgot how fucked up his skin was…. And hes drowning again

He’s also lashing out at people in chat and then pulling back “Ranboo: are you alright man” ahhh buddy YOU KNOW HES NOT

….You know. Some of the Dread HAS faded but it STILL sucks when Dream logs in.

“And Tubbo hasnt spoke to me…” :(

But hes still trying!!! Hes gonna make a path!!

Lol what is this melon monstrosity lol the youtube praise Tommy just screamed lmaoo

….Dream YOU can get out of VC 2 fuck off

….just the casual “oh yeah sorry” while he blows up the armor….

“DId anyone come to see you while I was gone” I see you, you obsessive fucker

“Weve become better friends” :/

HI MEXICAN DREAM WHAT AN INTRO THEYRE JUST STARING AT HIM LMAO

Yes BULLY HIM MD BULLY HIM

“WHICH ONES HOTTER” cursed cursed cursed

Lol the tone is so absurd Im having a good time

cc!Dream taking the time to pinpoint the particular restaurant its from lmaoo this man is funny

Lol Mexican Dream just chasing Dream away with Spanish YEAH GET EM MD

Tommys so excited to have someone who might live with him omg

“Borderline my owner” ….

…,,,look I just needed a short hand ok Mexican Dream is too long to type lol

,,,,,I dont know how to process Mamacita asdfsdfsd

SOMEHOW GOT MORE CURSED

Cant believe this is canon lore because it gets. SAD?? What is happening right now

This must have been a great tension breaker for people watching live though. A Nice break. Honestly I have mixed feelings about this being my first stream back lol

…..what are those maps huh? Old Memories huh? Tommy seems actually a bit embarrassed lmao

TUBBO!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TUBBO!!!!!

Asfsdfsdfsdfsdfsdfds these fuckign pictures jesus omg

Somehow this would be more sad if Tommy wasn't blowing out his mic fake crying lmao

…..hey fuck girl Dream though

Is girl Dream canonically Dream or a different character?

“You two are the happiest couple I know” … F for the dream smp where no relationship survives lol Love is Dead

….my heart was racing while Tommy was hiding the rest of the Tubbo pictures…

“Not on my stream you better not!” afdsfdsfsdfsd

Rip Mexican Dream lol Quackity dies to mobs a lot doesn’t he

………..I just got the walls joke F F F

……hi Dream you fucker

HEY BITCH, HEY BITCH BOY!!! YEEEEE TOMMY GET HIM

….. This is why Dream kills MD isn’t it

OUCH DIRECTLY AFTER THAT

MEXICAN DREAM DID JUST JUMP IN FRONT OF TOMMY JEEZ

….. Welp this is turning serious, Tommy is literally trying to distract Dream from chasing MD

The fucking decapitation joke asdfsdfsdf

OH MD WITH THE REAL GEAR!!!

….well that was short lived. As was Mexican Dream, Rest in Pieces I guess

“That was my last friend on the server. And that was his last death” “.......” “WELL WHAT DO YOU WANT TO DO TODAY ~ :D”

“I never thought I’d see the day where Mexican Dream is canonically dead”

….. The serious tone is back for sure ….. Its staring into lava and gaslighting time

Literally just killed his friend and Dream already getting Tommy to say they’re friends…

“He died of a drug overdose” “I watched you kill him” “Noo he died of natural causes” >:(

cc!Tommy really canonizing this just to twist the knife

...hes just standing in the fire :(

………begging him for company.. “I don’t think I have very long left” …….

At least Drista will be fun?

“Its fine, its really his rules now” “After tomorrow, then I think its over”.... This is the pillar isn’t it. The pillar is happening soon

“Tommy can you stop going insane please?” - FUNDY PLS LMAO

Strange interlude with Lazar… obviously Tommy is lashing out but I also feel like there is a bit of back-handedness to his interactions as well. Maybe the only one ACTUALLY only reaching out because of pity..?

Well that was a strange and oddly sad interlude. The middle was just the wildest of rides, but the end still managed to ground it back, mostly. 13 did NOT HURT in that regard honestly lol. I feel like I’ve definitely lost some momentum by splitting things up like this -- my recommendation to anyone watching is Definitely to shotgun it if you can do so safely. Its such a well written arc, even and up to including silly streams like this, and its a shame not to have watched it all at once.

STILL! Looking forward to seeing Drista, that little chaos godling has grown on me quite a bit, not least of all BECAUSE she’s a chas godling with creative mode lol. I’ve also heard thats the other “break” exile stream, so probably a bit more lighthearted (not least of all bc idk how much Drista the person actually knows and or cares about her brother’s block game role play canon lmao)

[llendrinall]

So i got another fic idea in my head The dates are very important. 1 (May 1998) Percy was a Ministry spy and he worked closely with Albus. He saved a lot of lives no matter their blood or if they were creatures. And at the battle of Hogwarts he saves Freds life but hes in crit condition George is a total ass (He's angry and takes it out on Percy) going off at him saying nasty things along the lines of that Percy isn't welcome at the Weasley home anymore.

2 When he tries to go to the House to talk to them he's not treated very well ("Dont wanna hear excuses Percy"). He just give up, packs his things in his flat, & the next morning he goes, gives his mission reports that date from the start of his Ministry career along with his resignation letter on Shacklebot's desk. Then he's off to America to start over he snuck into Freds hospital room & used Snapes healing charms as a way to 'set things right' before leaving.

3. Percy is now in New York, gets a job, and then spends the next 6 months working diligently and whatnot. Then he meets Audrey Smith, they end up going on a few dates and she introduces Percy to her local gym and they become gym buddies and soon start dating. (Aug 2000) After 2 years together (They're married) Percy and Audrey find out they're expecting. And then the twins are born on the 2nd of May 2001. Percy laughs a bit as Audrey pats him the shoulder and says "They sure chose the date"

4. Sep 11 2001) Audrey dies in the 9/11 attack (she was a muggle) & Percy is left a widow with 2 daughters to look after. (June 2002) He bumps into Oliver who's on a quidditch training exchange. They catch up. (Oliver doesn't bring up the fact that Percy's fam has been looking for him for years and that he's saved so many lives) As December rolls around Oliver spends it at Percy's, meeting the kids and hearing Percy tell him everything (His wife, his family and the war)

(I think this is part 5? Idk its 2am here) (Jan - May) They spend a lot of time together after Xmas and slowly Percy begins to heal a bit more after Audrey's death. Oliver ends up going back to the UK and Percy misses him. (July) Oliver comes back with news that he's transferred to an NY team "They might not be big on Quidditch here but they're extremely good, Perce" (Its not because Oliver has been inlove with Percy since Hogwarts. Neither is it because he loves Molly & Lucy to death either)

6 (Feb 2004) The UK Papers get a picture of Oliver, Percy the twins out and it BLOWS UP. Charlie (The only one who even heard Percy out back after the war ended, He knows the others did wrong by him) floos in and then warns Percy about everyone knowing he's here and that they're gonna be coming in 2 days. So He ends up having Charlie take the girls. He ends up meeting with his fam and it takes a long long time for them to heal and fix things.

7. His Fam only get to meet Molly and Lucy when they're 6. When they're 7 he and Oliver gets married. Idk why but i seem to only send you these fic ideas when im hella tired and at 2am. T_T Why am i like this? So Audrey named Molly and Perce named Lucy (After each others moms)

 Honestly, What can I say at this point? You have the whole story thought out. Go for it and write it!

It’s not the kind of story I write, though. But since you dropped the materials here, I can share how I would assemble it.

I would avoid New York. Big cities have a character. They are characters and you have to treat them as such. In Life skills, London is a character, complex and big and hard and beautiful. In Secret language of plants, even though Draco and Harry end up in London, I had them stay in the house because London was too big of a character for that stage of the story.

So, no New York. If I had to use a well-known city I would go with Boston, I think. Otherwise, a small one with a nice name.

Audrey doesn’t die on 9/11. Well, she dies on that day, but not on the attack. It’s something as simple and dull as a traffic accident. Percy wasn’t with her, not that it would have mattered. Yes, wizards have potions to mend bones instantly and protective charms and spells to stop the momentum, but Audrey died instantly, and no one could have seen the car until it was on her.

The driver was an old man, fumbling with that new invention, a mobile phone, trying to call his daughter who worked in New York.

Magic Law on the States is a bit… over the place. It would be extremely simple to put a curse or a hex that man. If Percy was clever about it, it wouldn’t be too illegal. But he doesn’t. Percy realizes it wouldn’t make him feel better.

 Percy doesn’t particularly like the States. The tea is terrible, the coffee is weak, the spelling is painful and people are entirely too talkative. But it’s sunnier than England and the orange juice is good, so he stays.

He goes to Romania every summer to visit Charlie. The girls love it there and it was always easy to talk to Charlie. Charlie who had such a promising career in Quidditch and rejected the fame and fortune for a thankless career working with dragons. Not even training dragons for bank security, which is a cool and profitable career, but fighting that very same use.

Charlie only goes back home for a week during Christmas, so he gets it. They don’t have to talk about it, never mention that weird state of loving your family and not wanting to be with them, to fight, to have to explain and justify your very existence and your life decisions.

He meets Oliver in Romania. Supposedly Oliver is there to see the sights and rest his left shoulder, that was injured at the end of the league. But he is not the first Quidditch player who has a crisis of faith and comes to Charlie with questions. So far, none of them had taken up dragon-protection, but one became a broomstick racer and another is the head coach of an Italian team.

Charlie only thinks about dragons. Oliver only thinks about Quidditch and is in the middle of an existential crisis. So it’s perfectible understandable that the topic of Percy, his war heroics and his semi mythical status is never brought up. To be fair, Charlie doesn’t know much about it because he doesn’t read English newspapers and his family never talks about Percy when he is around. Oliver just thinks that Percy is the first Competent Adult he has ever met and is much more interested about this Figuring Life Out than any hero status.

So it’s fair to say that the headlines come as a surprise.

Someone snapped a picture of Oliver and Percy sitting very close together in a park, with twin stupid loving smiles. It was all perfectly innocent. Molly was doing something cute out of frame and they never kept any physical distance between themselves, not even in Hogwarts. But it doesn’t matter. The picture is sold as proof of the mysterious war hero and the dashing sport star carrying a secret love affair. It’s a beautiful story, powerful. Percy is the tragic handsome hero and Oliver the right person to bring love back in his life after years nursing the wounds of war. Or perhaps Oliver is the sweet and honest good boy, the boyfriend every mother wants for her daughter, seduced by the man living a life of exotic and daring adventures.

Whatever it is, the world wants to believe in it. So much so that bloody Draco Malfoy pops up to warn them that there is a dozen of rabid, ruthless, paparazzies coming their way. He knows because Malfoy owns the most read magazine in England and has put a bounty on a photo of the two of them kissing.

Paparazzies don’t have a concept of trespassing, but breaking and entering into a dragon reserve has certain difficulties that can’t be bypassed with an alohomora and a lack of morals. Percy and Oliver spend the rest of the month in the reserve, not daring to go out. Twenty-two days in each other’s company, hiking in the mountains and playing with the girls. Molly and Lucy have decided that Oliver is similar to Charlie in all the right ways, so they like him.

On day nineteen, they kiss. Someone gets a picture of it, but, in his excitement, the photographer wanders into a nest of young dragon carps. He is recued three hours later sans pants or shoes. The photo of their first kiss is lost.

Oliver says he is almost done with his existential crisis but now Percy has one of his own.

You see, there is something Oliver hasn’t said. Something he didn’t mention at all. And Percy doesn’t know if Oliver just hasn’t noticed (it took him two years to realize all the Weasleys were siblings) or if he noticed but… doesn’t care?

There is more than one reason why only Charlie has met the girls.

Even now that Percy has received letters from every family member (including Freaking Aunt Muriel) and even a surprise visit from them (he has a life debt with Charlie for the heads-up) and they have begun the unpleasant work of fixing their relationship; even now, they haven’t met Molly and Lucy.

It’s because of the Weasley cousin they never talk about. The accountant.

Percy knows that it’s perfectly normal. Many wizarding children don’t exhibit any magic until they are at least seven. But he also knows that every single person in his family was levitating toys (Bill, Ron and Ginny) or stopping spilled milk in mid-air (him) or shooting sparks (Charlie and the twins) by the time they were three.

Molly and Lucy had done nothing magical so far. Nothing at all. And Percy knows, in his heart of hearts, that if anyone makes them feel inferior, if anyone dares to say anything against them, he will go the Dark Lord route and kill every single person prejudiced against squibs. He might kill every single wizard and witch and eradicate all magic, so his girls won’t feel inferior to anyone. He found in himself the strength to forgive the man than took Audrey’s life, but he won’t do the same for the person who speaks against his children. He can’t.

 On Christmas Percy reluctantly agrees to go to England with the girls because Charlie promises he will be there too. It is not easy. It is, in fact, very, very difficult and tense. He is forever grateful at Lee Jordan, who is glued to Fred’s hip cracking jokes and defusing tension. Also, Angelina Johnson takes George and Ginny to the kitchen and informs them they are the biggest idiots she has ever had the misfortune of meeting and that helps to avoid anyone saying something unforgivable they will regret their whole life. On Christmas’ Eve Harry Potter takes everyone’s wands because he is Harry Potter “and I do what I want” which means no one hexes anyone and they can overindulge the punch.

Oh, why bother? The whole thing is terrible and awkward and it hurts. But it is a necessary painful step, either to fix things with time or to say that he tried, actually tried, and never look back at this moment with regret.  

Also, he gets to meet with Oliver. It turns out that Oliver hadn’t noticed the girls’ lack of magic, but he also doesn’t care. Why would he care? Are you- are you supposed to care? Is this another thing Oliver missed because he only thinks about Quidditch? What’s wrong with not having magic in any case? Oliver’s mother is muggle and it is agreed that she is wonderful.  

(Even Potter says so. Percy has no idea of when Harry Potter met Oliver’s mum, but he speaks of her in the highest terms).

 You can read about what happened next on issues of 32, 33 & 34 of Alakazam as well as special issues 17, 21, 22 and 25. Draco Malfoy earns 1.5 million galleons with issue 33, setting a record for most successful print in wizarding history. Then he obliterates that record with a single stolen picture of Percy and Oliver’s wedding. He committed around a dozen crimes to get that picture, got drunk on champagne and victory and asked Harry Potter to marry him.

(He also donated all the money to a newly created society for the support and trade education of squibs, but only two people in the world know that).

[spockandawe]

Okay, I want to pull together more detailed thoughts at some point, I think, because the sheer amount of material means I have about ten billion thoughts to sort out. But I’ve read all three of the mxtx novels now, and loved all of them, in different ways. Though I already tried to figure out if I can pick a Favorite, and tbh, I can’t. I love them all in ways that are too distinct to let me rank them easily. And... man, it’s lucky for my friends that social distancing is in place, or I’d be hassling them shamelessly to give these novels a try.

RIGHT. So.

The Scum Villain’s Self-Saving System: Shen Yuan goes to bed full of rage directed at a trashy webnovel with a grimdark blackened hero who conquered the world and collected hundreds of women into his harem.... and wakes up in novel, while that hero is still an innocent youth. As the hero’s abusive teacher. Who is doomed for a horrifying death unless he can somehow turn things around.

I think I had the most fun with this one. I really enjoy self-referential stories, and stories poking fun at certain genres, and I’ve run into the concept of transmigration before (the idea being a person enters a fictional world, a la lost in austen), though I’m blanking on any media like that I’ve actually consumed. This was chronologically the first book mxtx wrote, and it has less of a sprawling cast with complicated relationships than the other two books, but it definitely has the thing where she lays early groundwork for later revelations that shatter my poor heart. 

And there may be fewer relationships to play with, but my GOD, do I love the relationships we got. I’ve been rolling around in svsss fanfic since I finished the book, even more so than mdzs or tgcf. There’s a lot of good crunchy relationship content with the 79 ship (they destroy me, all day every day), Liu Qingge owns my whole-ass heart, and Luo Binghe makes for a fascinating love interest. I love that even at his best, he remains a needy, needy, manipulative boy, who’s so smart and strong and nEEDY. I don’t love how the book handled moshang, but mmmm the fan content is Good. And Shen Qingqiu does the unreliable narrator thing that is usually not my jam, but works so WELL in these books, in that his unreliable narration is hugely skewed towards not giving himself nearly as much credit as he deserves. Xie Lian takes this to UNBELIEVABLE heights in tgcf, but in Shen Qingqiu’s case, it’s done on such a casual, immediate, personal level that I’m fascinated by everything he does. 

And, since Shen Yuan/Shen Qingqiu is a millennial fan of trashy romance webnovels who gets yanked into the universe of a novel he hates, into an old-timey xianxia setting, the prose is SO COOL. You swing between modern slang and old school high society courtesies at the drop of a hat, and I’m honestly awed that the translators were able to catch so much of that. Like, in-setting, I love all the nuance you can get in ‘qi-ge should give his a-jiu the scroll’ vs ‘yue-shixiong should give this teacher the scroll’ vs ‘you should give me the scroll’. But then it adds a whole new layer when the person ALSO has modern-day casual speech bouncing around in their head. It makes for a fascinating, fascinating reading experience.

The Grandmaster Of Demonic Cultivation: Thirteen years ago, Wei Wuxian died. And then he wakes up! In someone else’s body. I’m not going to try to summarize the premise of this one, go look up The Untamed if you want someone to do a better job of this than me XD

Ahhh, this was the book I read first. I still haven’t watched the show (only clips) and I’m not sure I ever will, because adhd is a hell of a drug. But it’s hard to purely evaluate the prose when there’s also this gorgeous, beautifully-acted visual adaptation all over my tumblr to bias me in its favor. I think this book benefits a lot from the MYSTERY of it all. From the very start, there’s the question of ‘what the fuck is up with this goddamn arm’ that the characters pursue, even as that takes them through flashbacks and other arcs within the story. It gives a thrust to the novel that I think isn’t exactly there in tgcf, though I’m torn on which one is “better.” This gave the story momentum, yes, but it also meant I was much more impatient in yi city and the 3zun flashbacks, because this isn’t what I was focused onnnnnn this is cool but how much longer will we BE HERE--

That being said, I think I’ll be more patient with those flashbacks on my next time through the book, now that I have a better picture of where everything is headed. I think the balance and structure of the book worked really well, I was setting myself up for self-sabotage because of the pace I was plowing through the thing. My reading habits didn’t lend themselves well to the nonlinear storytelling, and it speaks to the story’s strength that it held up that well despite me. And the CAST. My GOD. I went in not caring about anyone but Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji and maybe the jackass nephew, but... that Did Not Last. I didn’t intend to care about 3zun? Nope, too bad, you care so much now. Who cares about Xue Yang? Me. I care. Way too much. HECK!!!

And something that happens in this book and tgcf that was much less of a thing in svsss is that there are some meaningful holes in the story that I’d like to be filled, and I really care about filling-- and the story doesn’t go there. But it doesn’t leave me unhappy, it leaves me cheerfully scrabbling around in the throwaway details trying to piece together a picture of what happened when I wasn’t looking. What happened to Wei Wuxian in the burial mounds? How did Hua Cheng take control of the ghost city? Idk, but let us Rummage and theorize and roll around in ideas and have a fantastic, speculative time. Svsss might hook me more than the other stories from an au+shipping perspective, but mdzs and tgcf do a great job of making me want to roll around and create within the bounds of canon.

Heaven Official’s Blessing: 800 years ago, Xie Lian ascended to heaven. And fell. And rose again! And fell again. Now he’s ascended for the third time, and things are Awkward.

God, I just finished this, and I’m still reeling. This is the LONGEST mxtx book, that’s for sure. I also think it’s the most tightly edited translation. All the translators did an unbelievable job, I could never even approach what they accomplished, but I am genuinely stunned that a book this long was edited so well. I blew through this in about 3.5 days (if not for work, i could have made it in three dghsafdsgf) and my brain was cooking in my skull by the time I was halfway through, but I couldn’t STOP. I was ENCHANTED the entire time! I was reading so much my head was destroying me and I still sulked so HARD every time I had to put my phone down and sleep.

This book sprawls the hardest, I think, because it involves a cast made of mostly immortal/immortal-adjacent people, so time and space get... flexible. And I feel really bad saying this, because Lan Wangji is DEVOTED, but this is seriously the book with the most attentive and adoring and respectful love interest. Hua Cheng is..... god. I truly don’t think I’ve EVER read a character quite like him before, and I am so, so sad, because I don’t know how I’ll find one who lives up to these heights ever again XD I recommend reading this book just for the Hua Cheng experience, if nothing else. I was making audible noises at literally flailing at multiple points in the story, but most often, it was because of him. 

Shipping is what usually drags me into a fandom hardest, and all of these books do pretty well for themselves, all of them have a nice selection of fluffy and crunchy ships to choose from. And this one... goddammit. I just realized, that the best, most crunchy ships are too spoilery for me to be willing to talk about them here. Hell. Goddammit. But I think tgcf has the crunchiest ship of all, even better than xuexiao. I was so invested, and then there were Reveals, and then I was like OH NO THIS IS TERRIBLE BUT MY INVESTMENT HAS EXPONENTIALLY INCREASED. 

And something that I really, really appreciate, is that across the mxtx books, even though a lot of characters fit into strong archetypes, there’s nobody that is blurring together for me, either within or across the books. Liu Qingge isn’t Jiang Cheng isn’t Feng Xin. They’re all blunt, fighty boys, but all super distinct in my head, and what I want for each of them is distinct and character-driven. I want Liu Qingge to be properly cherished and I want Jiang Cheng to relax with his brother and nephew and I want Feng Xin to [goddammit i don’t want to spoil this book AGH]. It’s something I appreciated in the other books too, but I can really FEEL it in this book, with how long and luxurious it is. 

And last thing I have to say, I think, is that tgcf is so long. It’s so, so long. But I would FITE if anyone tried to pare it down at all. I can’t think of anything I’d be willing to sacrifice. I enjoyed every last piece of it so much, and it was all ultimately SO well-constructed and interlocking, that any piece I can think of snipping out would take away significant emotional impact from what was left. It’s a nonlinear story, like mdzs is nonlinear, and I loved mdzs a lot! But the construction here is so, so, so elegant. I’m just in AWE of how well it was assembled. I was in Agony as reveals happened, because oh no no no no, now that they’ve told me this, that casts this whole other scene in a brand new light! The one I read hundreds of thousands of words ago! Literally, I need to go start the book over so I can savor the shitty teens in new ways, given [redacted] as revealed in like, the last twenty percent of the book. The book was a fun experience, but there’s so Much here that I know I haven’t even absorbed yet. I loved the other mxtx books a lot, and in many ways, they were easier to get a grasp on than tgcf was, but even before I finished tgcf I was already despairingly trying to figure out how easily I could fit a full reread into my life, and I think that says a lot

[psi-psina]

05/09 Niigata LOTS

SE 詩踏み 咀嚼

蜷局 腐海 理由

New song (zankoku ?) New song (omae) 輪郭 THE BLOSSOMING BEELZEBUB

Ranunculus 人間を被る Punk song (GO MAD) Ash Revelation of mankind

EN 鼓動 The inferno THE IIID EMPIRE Beautiful Dirt 羅刹国

Same as yesterday, I wrote this last night before passing out after eating 3 fish taco’s and 3 glasses of red wine so this may have effected my memory a bit but I hope it is somewhat readable :)

Today was absolute FIRE. The setlist yesterday was better (my fave) but the guys were WAY more into it today, especially Kyo. I am so shit at outfits and I am really sorry. Today I only remember Kyo and Die's because I was closer to kamite in front of Shinya today. (it was so nice!!!) Die wore the outfit from the album promo photoshoot, Kaoru was definitely not wearing his (full) photoshoot outfit and I don't think? Toshiya was either but I can't remember anything else, I am sorry. Kyo's outfit was fantastic, he wore a white sleeveless blouse and his black skinny jeans with the ripped knees and over that his giant alice auaa...suspenders? It’s a big rectangular skirt that he can put his arms through as well, they are fucking awesome and he made WAY better use of them than he did when he wore them in Osaka *__* He wore his rosette badge again, on the front of the suspenders. And he wore his headgear from mode of DSS, with a black hair extension down the right side of his face and his white contacts. He was also wearing his new mac lipstick & gloss combo. I'm not sure if he had his grill in but I think he did? Damn it looked so good! I'm not usually a big fan of headgear on Kyo because I really prefer to be able to see his expressions more freely but even though this gear covers most of his face it actually enhanced his expressions. It just really....suits him? He wears it really well, I love it.

The whole front section of the set was very atmospheric. Niigata's response to Soshaku wasn't quite as lusty as Osaka's was, but ahh people were moving so much during Toguro and just feeling it SO MUCH. BLISS. Fukai was a stand out tonight, I caught Die's eye near the start of it and we looked at each other briefly, I smiled at him and he smiled back <3 he's so lovely. Die got my attention during Fukai today, I'm sorry Kaoru (ILU). The Fukai mosh was also Bliss. Kyo got us to sing a LOT, he called on us in the first chorus and other parts of the song, he screamed for more and ripped his monitor out so he could hear us better and we GAVE IT TO HIM. ❤️ Riyuu got lots of movement as well today, and went down even better than yesterday. Then I think it was during this interlude that everyone was pretty quiet, and then Kaoru sidled up in front of shimote with that cocky swagger of his and there was this sudden ROAR for Kaoru from shimote which got everyone in the middle shouting for him as well 😂 Then Kyo came back to the front and tilted his head back in that demented snarl-grin he's doing lately and everyone roared at him. Then it was time for the new songs again and it was much the same as yesterday, I can't remember much because I was going crazy. >.< They are just too good.

Kyo made the fox 🤘 at the end of Rinkaku when he was calling the demon. Beelzebub was FANTASTIC today! The flatness of Kyo's mood yesterday had a big effect in Beelzebub, but today was completely different. He was a lot more intense. After he bundled up his cord-intestines and dropped them, he was looking down at them sullenly and kind of waved at them. He deeply growled 'kyou wa kono mama nemuri ni tsukitai' in this transfixing pose...it was fucking Amazing (it's really stuck in my memory) and again after 'ugoku kometsubu ni...' he was trying to stomp on some phantom creepy-crawlies again. He went to town on his mouth towards the end, he did not drool everywhere today but rather uh, deeply fingered his mouth and played with his tongue. He was brazenly eyeballing people up on his crate while doing this, he looked right at me and it was UNCOMFORTABLE.

The interlude between Beelzebub and Ranunculus was really...intense? Idk, legit, no one even moved, the place was so enchanted and thick with anticipation it was just...magic. Ranunculus was also more emotional today than it was yesterday, there was a fair bit of movement from the fans and Die was very passionate during the chorus. Then Ningen was up, oh man...Those moments of stillness as Ranunculus closes out and you are absolutely SODDEN with 5 million emotions and could literally just die and then those deep melancholy chords open up Ningen and Kyo steps forward and raises his hand and calls out and everyone calls back and you can FEEL THE INTAKE OF BREATH as the riff comes crashing in and then !!!!! AAAHHH!!!! IT IS BURNED INTO MY MEMORY!! I know a lot of people did not like Ningen but fuck it is so good live, it is SO emotional and the dynamics just COME ALIVE. I really like the sound of the studio ver but it is flawed, and in some ways hampers the song a bit.

The punk song came next and fans were GETTING DOWN, there was DANCING and so much jumping. God it was so much fun and I could see how satisfied Kyo and Toshiya were with the response. <3 Ash was MESSY. Kyo got us to sing excessively and spent a lot of time at the edge of the stage monitor-less which just makes everyone go crazy. The ending thrash was epic, someone behind me grabbed my shoulders and was going so hard they were shaking me (NO COMPLAINTS JUST GIVES ME MORE MOMENTUM). When the song ended they were kind enough to disentangle from my hair without pulling it 😂 Then Revelation oh my god. Revelation is a song I didn't enjoy at all right through 2015 but amazingly it has grown on me and I now enjoy it even though it is still too chaotic and dissonant and exhausting. It's so brutal as a set closer I kind of wish they would just open with it laskdjf. I best remember Kyo shrieking "NIIGATAAAAAA" and at some point someone getting their arm in my mouth asflkjs idk what happened but I definitely got like the sweat of 5 people in my mouth then. Gross. And lol at Kyo making us sing "michinaki michi o" like lkajnfl yes Kyo, stretch us to the very limits of your ridiculous vocal range. The ending thrash was, again, absolute filth and when I emerged all I could see was Kyo towering up there on his crate with this MALEVOLENT look on his face. He turned and left the stage and the other guys followed promptly.

The encore was BEYOND. Kaoru, Toshiya and Die all came out wearing the white goat tee with the sleeves cut, And Kyo changed into a plain black blouse and removed his headgear. I could see at the end he had red and black eye makeup on. Shinya was wearing the white tee with the patches all over it I think. Then Kodou just completely set everyone on fire. skjdnffa. Kyo pointed right at me during Kodou, what even. I clapped eyes with him and Die a few times tonight (it's just where I was) but he really took me by surprise ;_; at the first chorus of Kodou as he was walking around his crate to stand at the edge of the stage Kyo put a hand over his heart and lunged forward pointing right fuckin at me looking me in the god damn eyes as we sang 'KOE KOROSHITE ME O FUSAIDE' together. It was like being ATTACKED. Dazzling. Unbelievable. 😭 He stood right at the edge and ripped out his monitor and sang his heart out going mic-less here and there and looking at people HARD and screaming more more more. Kodou owns my entire soul.

I lost my damn mind again during The inferno, someone had grabbed hold of the back of my shirt and was using my back for support and fuckin growling and I was straight up just snarling and shaking my fist at Kyo every time I surfaced from thrashing. Kyo was having some trouble with his mic tonight (the sound was dropping out a fair bit) but during The inferno it completely died. He turned back to the sound guys gesturing at the dead mic then threw it down and turned back to the crowd and snarled at us without it, gesturing wildly and smacking himself and going down in a crouch and fans went NUTS. And a moment later one of the guys had restored his mic and after a tentative moment (he was shy of the mic for a moment as he tested to see if it was working....it was...Cute  lakjsnflgkadf) he was back in full force. All happened VERY quickly and by the end he looked WELL pleased.

My part of the crowd almost collapsed during IIID it was heaving and bouncing so much and the guys started going EVERYWHEREE. Idk if it was during IIID or Beautiful but Kaoru came over to stand right in front of us and the crazed snarls of "KAAAOOORRRUUUUU!!!!" and wordless howling actually made me LAUGH because he totally DEADPANNED us like "Ehh? Is that it??" Then he smirked and went further over to kamite. BITCH. (Eta, pretty sure it was Beautiful actually) Is2g i am lucky my shirt didn't get ripped during IIID because it was insane and Kyo kept shouting for more more more more until he got drowned out by the screaming. I got a bit of nausea/stomach pain briefly towards the end like whelp going a bit TOO hard rn. My throat and the right side of my ribcage/right shoulder blade feel bruised as hell idek what happened. Feels like I pulled the muscles.

Then straight into Beautiful Dirt which was just as fuckin relentless alkjsnf Kyo swooped over to shimote during the second verse and showered them with some attention because Kaoru was over in kamite quite a lot and Toshiya and Die had come to the centre. Even with Kyo right over on Kaoru's side everyone kept screaming "SAIKOU NO BARAADO O OKUROU" with no encouragement every time alskjnf. Had a great moment with Die, he was right in front of us at the very edge and he was looking at everyone with such affection. Such a warm expression and I couldn't help it I just went 'DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE' and flailed at him and was surely smiling like a fool and everyone around me was calling out to him as well and his face just GLOWED lALKJSNFA he smiled at us again and bowed and flipped his hair the way he does and then moved away ;3; Kaoru and Toshiya joined forces at some point, Kaoru lounged on the edge of the crate briefly. I don't know what Kyo was doing after he came back from shimote, it was the roughest part of the song and I was thrashing. I totally get why Kyo gets us to sing "saikou...." every damn time because it's BEYOND EXHAUSTING. He LOVES making us struggle ksdjgnklf.

Kyo's MC at the end was a lot more enthusiastic tonight, he called twice to the men and women, shouted without the mic and did the usual riles and pounded on his chest. He got shirtless for Rasetsukoku tonight and...yeah, it was crazy. I'm struggling to remember anything it was just solid thrashing and roaring from all involved and giving my all took every ounce of energy I had I HAD NOTHING LEFT FOR OBSerVATION. I can't actually remember how it ended or what Kyo or any of the guys were doing until the post concert gift-giving. I did see Kyo's new tattoo very clearly tonight though, it looks good! Kyo stayed back, which was nice. He showered fans with a couple of bottles of water and wiped off all his makeup onto a towel and threw that in. He then got the bucket of water and DUMPED the whole thing onto one guy on the rail in front of him and tossed the bucket in too. He crouched down and slapped hands with the fans on the rail as well <3 I heard him sing out 'bye bye!!' as he straightened up again and i love the way his face scrunches up with emotion as everyone sings bye bye and waves back to him. He left with a couple of fox kisses. <3

Kaoru and Die threw a lot more picks today and I FELT Die's pick in my fingers but it escaped me 😭 A girl behind me just kept screaming thank you thank you thank you all of them. ;__; Shinya and Kaoru were fucking adorable, Shinya came to the front after he threw all his drumsticks with the uchiwa and fanned us! It was! Adorable! Then he threw the uchiwa to the Kyo pit. Kaoru was eyeing him as he strutted around and after Shinya left he took his own uchiwa and fanned shimote with it and BLEW ON THE FANS lksdhfnl he is such! a dork! I love him oh my god. As Die finished up his gift-giving he stood just in front of us and just looked at us, his eyes looked really glassy at the end? I was like, did you cry?? And man he looked tired, and really emotional. But he was just looking at us and clapping and smiling and we started a chant for him and he just looked so....overwhelmed and thankful oh my god. Sweetheart. 😭Kaoru was the last to leave again and he kept stopping and lingering to get that last little bit out of us....GAH. Then we all wobbled out.

To cap this experience as I was going to cloak I stood near a little girl while fumbling for my ticket, who saw me and turned to me, absolutely THRIVING, and said ‘KONNICHIWA’ with the most beautiful smile on her face and I was just like alksjnfliaj OVERCOME and said “konnichiwa sweetheart!!” to her and she like...squealed and just stared at me and her mum was laughing. Her mum said hello to me as well ;3; Fans with kids are the absolute best. The little girl wasn’t wearing a tour shirt but she was proudly sporting the hanged-man muffler towel and was just LOVING LIFE skldjfn. I love her ;___;

Niigata...thank you for these memories. I will always treasure these nights. ❤️

[shadu-kiam]

I am bias Kate reminded me of my best friend when they are under a lot of stress so I was like already rooting for her. I liked Ashley a lot he was really sweet and his bakes were pleasing.

I thought Ali had the best dishes overall (and I really thought Irene had GREAT ideas even if they weren’t always executed 100%) -- but sadly cooking is such a high-pressure business, so I don’t know if either of them are looking at a future in cooking if they can’t learn to handle that pressure. Handling pressure is like 50% of a chef’s daily life!

Like there have been days where nothing has gone right for me. The food is coming out shitty. The guests are unhappy. My timing is off. Like in my top ten Worst Days Ever, like 8 of them are related to my line of work (the other ones being deaths in the family or something). The busiest day of the year culinary wise is Mother’s Day, and I had a Mother’s Day two years ago where I was already getting my butt handed to me and on top of it all I got a phone call from my aunt that my grandma and my nephew both died (car accident, she was driving, he was eight years old) - across the country in Seattle (I was in DC). It was literally the number one worst day of my entire life.

But I held it together and finished out the eight-hour-long buffet service (got the call two hours in, but it ended up being like a sixteen hour day for me already because of all the prep that went into it in the early morning), rallying my cooks and servers and making sure everything stayed great for the guests (with minimal staffing because everyone calls out on holidays)... like, when everything is going wrong, the very last thing you can do is fall apart, because everyone falls apart with you. It’s honestly a lot of responsibility, both personally and socially. I think I finally started crying during clean-up (too much time to think about it) and once I started, I couldn’t stop, but that was after service was all over (my FOH partner was perfectly aghast that I’d even stuck it out through service at all and sent me home before clean-up was even over, but tbh I think I needed to keep working because the only alternative was to go home and think about how I’d lost two very special people in my life, the distraction was kind of a blessing in a weird way).

Idk huge ramble moment -- but it’s the kind of thing where if you go into hysterics because you can’t plate your stuff in time in the competition, then honestly, even as talented as you are, you probably just don’t have what you really need to work in an industry that’s SO unforgiving to moments of weakness.

It’s a shame because Ali had some of the best dishes in the whole competition, but sadly this can’t be the industry for her unless she learns to calm herself and find the momentum to keep going when everything’s at odds.

WOW THIS WAS SUCH A LONG ONE omg who are you anon

[libertydevitto]

ah!! @bobbyjean tagged me to do this 83 question long thing, thank you thank you

last…

1. Drink: iced tea

2. Phone call: my mom

3. Text message: I texted Now Radio to request a song lmao

4. Song you listened to: uhhhh idk. 

5. Time you cried: I don’t know it’s been a couple of weeks? Which is odd for me?

have you ever…

6. Dated somebody twice: nope

7. Kissed someone and regretted it: yep

8. Have been cheated on: not that I know of

9. Lost someone special: yeah...

10. Been depressed: I have bipolar disorder

11. Gotten drunk and thrown up: nooo

favorite colors…

12. To wear: what are we supposed to fill all three of these with our favourite colors. joey what did you do. i’m kidding you’re great. to wear? black (i know that’s a shade)

13. uh i like yellow

14. i like all the colors

In the last year have you…

15. Made new friends: yeah!

16. Fallen out of love: yeah

17. Laughed until you cried: yep

18. Found out somebody was talking about you: uh i think so

19. Met somebody who changed you: yeah :^)

20. Found out who your friends are: kind of? more like a constant confirmation that my closest friends are really good eggs

21. Kissed somebody on your Facebook list: no

General

22.  How many of your Facebook friends do you know in real life: uh, many. you know what, i have a really small amount of friends, i’m going to count them. 48.

23. Do you have any pets: five kitties

24. Do you want to change your name: uh yes

25. What did you do for your last birthday: god, I don’t remember, I can’t remember a goddamn thing. oh. i went to marco’s famous and had a mediocre cheese burger.

26. What time did you wake up: 6 am? and then i went back to sleep and woke up at a reasonable hour!!! 8ish!!!

27. What were you doing at midnight: doing some weird shit online probably

28. Name something you can’t wait for: SO MANY THINGS BUT CURRENTLY MAINLY FINDING OUT IF I GOT THIS JOB

29. When was the last time you saw your mom: i’m lookin’ at her right now, she’s chilling on the other couch

30. What are you listening to right now: a shitty episode of Criminal Minds

31. Have you ever talked to someone named Tom: yeah!

32. Something that gets on your nerves: people telling me i speak too softly

33. Most visited website: tumblr, definitely 

34. Hair color: dark brown

35. Long or short hair: currently long

36. Do you have a crush on somebody: yeah.......  :^)))))))))

37. What do you like about yourself: a lot of shit. my legs.

38. Piercings: none at the moment.

39. Blood type: I don’t know?

40. Nickname: uh Kat is one. Briefly I was Kato.

41. Relationship status: single

42. Zodiac: taurus

43. Pronouns: any of ‘em

44. Favorite tv shows: Gilmore Girls, Friends, uh, Fillmore, Whose Line? idk.

45. Tattoos: a J on my leg

46. Right or left handed: right

47. Surgery: none

48. Sports: ??? uh I’ve never played sports outside of gym class but I like basketball and hockey 

49. Vacation: these are the vaguest questions... they’re not even questions. my next vacation will be to Quebec, my last “vacation” was a day trip to Drumheller, and my last real vacation was to Toronto

50. Pair of trainers: what does this mean!!! “pair of sneakers” i don’t understand!!!

51. Eating: i’m full of chicken

52. Favorite drink: iced tea

53. What are you up to: working on this, doing some laundry, trying not to die

54. Waiting for: motivation (doooooooon’t forget your second wind, sooner or later you’ll feel that momentum kick in!) oh and also for billy to put out A NEW FUCKING ALBUM

55. Want: to kiss this one girl

56. Get married: eventually!

57. Career: filmmaker

58. Hugs or kisses: uh hugs i guess

59. Lips or eyes: lips

60. Shorter or taller: shorter

61. Older or younger: well older in general

62. Nice arms or stomach: both, but rock hard abs freak me out, so chubby is nice in my eyes. although i also like super muscular arms so?

63. Hook up or relationship: relationship

64. Troublemaker or hesitant: both

65. Kissed a stranger: not an actual stranger, someone i barely knew

66. Drank hard liquor: yep

67. Lost glasses/contact lenses: no, surprisingly enough

68. Turned someone down: uh i don’t think so?

69. Sex on the first date: i’ve gotten close

70. Broken someone’s heart: maybe?

71. Had your heart broken: yes

72. Been arrested: no

73. Cried when someone died: of course

74. Fallen for a friend: 98% of them, yes

Do you believe in…

75. Yourself: yeah!

76. Miracles: i probably should as a catholic who prays to saints but nah not really

77. Love at first sight: no

78. Santa Claus: no?

79. Kiss on the first date: yeah!

80. Angels: no

81. Current best friends names: uh??? Ian, Karli, Brownie, Andy, Eevy and I have a lot of close friends but these are my best friends ya know?

82. Eyecolor: hazel

83. Favorite movie: all of them, all the movies

i’m going to tag EVERYBODY because i can’t pick but especially @bugles-and-bagels and @yuk1zome

[iolite-ethereal]

Ok so starting around 9:10 or so tonight i almost died 3 times in the span of 5 to 10 minutes

Idk what it was that helped me be it sheer dumb luck or whatever but in the span of 10 minutes (at most. Likely less than that) i was both incredibly unlucky and incredibly fortunate. Pretty much I almost died 3 times within that 10 minute span.

I was trying to ride my bike home from work with a latte in hand, in the dark- and while i do have a proper light for night riding and i am able to ride with a drink in hand easily- tonight was not my night. Not even a block from my work, i managed to be blinded by oncoming headlights on the road to where i couldnt see a bump in the sidewalk that made my handlebars swerve unexpextedly, which startled me into pulling the breaks. On the ride to work i discovered that my handle bars were loose but i didnt have time to find a different ride, so when i hit the breaks the bars shifted down as i was pushed forward by momentum. I lost balance, and fell, latte in hand, left into the grass, which is more fortunate than right into oncoming traffic. I ended up only skinning my knee slightly and quite comically falling onto by back leading to pouring some of my latte right over the bridge of my nose and onto my face and eyes. Unharmed but shaken i gathered myself up, fixed my now twisted handlebars into at least managable condition, and attempted to carry on my way, only to almost get hit by a car speeding out of a nursing home driveway not 50 feet away from where i just fell. The driver didnt even give a shit and also i fucking hate tjat nursing home bc they thought it was a great idea to put tall shrubberies all around to the point where drivers cant see out into the road where they need to turn so they get impatient and zoom out without looking. But yeah car looked like it had already gotten hit from the side once and the whole time the driver was just lookin left and when they saw me we made eye contact and then they just kept going like bitch you /know/ what the fuck just happened, you can fucking /tell/ and you dont give a shit? I hope whoever you put in that poor nursing home os treated well and is dissapointed in you and your life choices and if you work there then i feel sorry for every one of your clients since you obviously dont care about people's well being jfc. And after that i decided to call it quits bc i can take a hint considering how hard i had to brake and shove my foot on the cement and swerve bc of that person so soon after wiping out so i texted my dad to come and get me. After he replied i decided to wait in the light of the large lamp hanging from the sidewalk entry of that stupid place bc tbh thats a decent spot to be. I was visible, and away from the splash zone of the puddle as well as the murder driveway of the nursing home. But qhile waiting i got worried about the idea that maybe something fell out of my backpack when i fell, so i turned on my phones flashlight and walked away from my bike, back across the hellish driveway, back along where i probably fell, and, seeing nothing, walked back. Of course on my way back across the driveway of evil a car decided to quickly turn into this dam thing and of course once again i am almost ran over. Honestly what the hell. I get the first time bc its a divided driveway so of course you cant see on the right turning out but turning in? The giant ass sign in the middle of it lights up the whole damn driveway! I was fucking VISIBLE. INARGUABLY. VISIBLE. WATCH WHERE YOU ARE FUCKING GOING. So in the nd i just stood on the sidewalk and waited for my dad to grab me and as i expected the normally impossible task of getting my bike in the car was made possible with my new magical posable handlebars and i got a ride home. And of course somehow getting the bike in the car jostled something too much and the damn mechanism got fucked so now the pedals turn without moving the chain. Hooray. Lovely.

In the end im left with a minorly broken yet inoperable bike, a tiny bit of skin shaved off but no blood lost, a surprisingly only slightly lighter latte cup, and a somewhat sore upperback. It was also kinda sprinkling so im suprised my clothes didnt get soaked sitting in the grass? Either way all that is better than a mangled leg or cracked skull, or getting hit by a car (or 2), or whatever the fuck else that was awaiting any more than half a block away from my work. Seriously im starting to think that if i hadn't stopped when i did then i was gonna actually get hit by a car or mugged on the way home or something. I feel like one of those cartoon characters that keeps having near misses with anvils and pianos and cliffs but is unscathed, thought this doesnt make me feel invincible but rather cautious. Anyway, good night to you all and i hope you have a better time than i did in your near future!

[fic-dreamin]

5.0 out of 5 stars It was like a shot of Kahlua you didn't expect in your ...

4.0 out of 5 stars "And, well that's my story. I'm sorry that it's so, you know. Retarded." It's the damndest thing.. For some reason, for these last few weeks, it's like the world is filled with grotesque monsters. But not everyone sees it. Others tell me they see happy faces. But I've been seeing the smile of crocodiles. With a voracious, world eating hunger that can never be sated until all living things are torn apart and digested in the..Oh yeah, and there's also dick jokes in this. If I ever outgrow a good dick joke, you should just shoot me.I had already seen the movie a while ago, but I got the book because so many reviewers were saying how much the movie got wrong. I completely disagree. The movie was one of the best things I saw in years; easily 5 stars imo. The film told a lot of things out of sequence, and some of the things the characters did was jumbled around, but I was amazed at the level of detail in the movie and a huge amound of dialog was repeated verbatim. *small spoilers that I don't think will actually ruin anything for you*.. I'm very glad the wig monsters weren't included or all the Bible/holy water stuff. I think adding the shadow people would have made the movie too convoluted. As would the Pi symbol stuff. After reading some of the book reviews, I thought maybe I had completely misunderstood the movie, but I believe I understood it just fine. The main thing though that I thought the movie didn't really capture was John's personality. From the movie, I thought of him as.. idk, perhaps a bit like Dr. Venkman (bill murray) from Ghostbusters. But in reality he was supposed to be kind of a half maniac half zen smartass who is sort of a genius and you can fully understand why the book has his name in the title.Okay, so here's why I gave the book a lower rating than I'd give the movie..Read more › Go to Amazon

2.0 out of 5 stars Tedious garbage; the extra star awarded for a few genuinely funny lines buried in the miasma Very difficult book to finish; I'm glad it's over. Post-modern silliness; tedious and unrewarding; not really horror mixed with comedy, as it's nearly all comedy (a total, for me, of one scary scene) and nearly all the comedy is of the apathetic slacker/pubescent potty mouth variety. A thousand jokes is, like, 900 too many, dude. The episodic plot feels patched together from the author's unpublished short stories, so the continuity suffers. For instance, I could swear that the character/narrator Dave describes himself as tall in chapter one or two but by the end of the novel reveals for the first time that he's actually shorter than his sidekick John. Felt like an error due to cut and paste. There's almost no forward momentum here, and only one interesting character, and she doesn't appear until near the end. Only one tiny twist in the "plot" struck me as having been nicely, even admirably planned in advance, with all the rest just seeming random change. There are too many minor characters: when one late character is introduced as being related to "Big Jim," I just couldn't remember who Big Jim had been; and when, still later, Big Jim's fate is recalled by the narrator, I actually couldn't remember that it had earlier played out in fictive "real time--which is sad because that forgettable episode turns out to have been fundamental to poor Dave's character development. And finally, author Wong is really bad at describing action; the big Las Vegas scene, for instance, was impossible to visualize. Did I mention that the narrator promises to reveal the truth about the universe but never does? Go to Amazon

5.0 out of 5 stars It's like Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure in the Netherworld, but funny If the movie Alien was “Jaws in space,” then John Dies at the End is “Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure in the Nether World.” Except that, unlike Bill and Ted’s, Wong’s book is hilarious.The gist of this book is that two likable anti-heroes ingest a drug, “soy sauce,” that gives them the ability to pass into an alternate universe. They’re inexorably drawn down the rabbit hole (so to speak, there is no actual rabbit hole in this book.) What they find is not what they expected. It’s not what anyone expected, because it’s so mind-boggling ridiculous and richly complex.The title character, John, oddly enough is not the main character. The author, David Wong, uses a self-named protagonist as narrator and lead. The book unfolds as Wong (the character, not the author) tells a skeptical journalist about the strange goings-on in his small, Midwestern hometown.We see John mostly through the lens of the narrating Wong. We know that John is a storyteller. Which may sound a lot like “liar,” but that’s not the case. Have you ever known a person who would never deceive you for personal gain, but will never fail to engage in hyperbole to make a story funnier or more interesting? That is John. He has one of my favorite lines of the book:“We’re talking about a tentacled flying lamp f@#%er, Dave. What are you prepared to call unlikely?”Despite the fact that John is a booze-hound and exaggerator, he remains an endearing character. As Wong gets to know Amy, a classmate who lost her hand after they knew each other in school, we get an insightful testimonial about John:“Let me tell you something about John. The reason I was surprised by your hand was because John never once described you as, ‘the girl with the missing hand.Read more › Go to Amazon

[failingtheoscars]

2021 Oscar Predictions: "I Didn't See Shit" Edition

Hello everyone, Facebook has deleted the Notes feature despite my numerous stern emails, so I've been forced to use tumblr, of all things. Remember tumblr? It's that website that was made for porn. Turns out it's for blogs now. Who knew?

Let's take a trip down memory lane:

2020 - 21/24

2019 - 13/24 (lol)

2018 - Lost to the sands of time

2017 - 17/24

2016 - 16/24

2015 - ???

2014 - 18/24

And sometime in the past I entered some concert to beat Ebert and I got 21/24. This is the current record. It will not be beaten this year, because I ain't seen SHIT. But there's only 23 categories now, so I guess that helps? So let's do this.

Best Actor - This is one of those years where all the wind is blowing behind Chadwick Boseman's back - he is very good in Ma Rainey, and also he's... post-humous. If we can all be honest to ourselves, we know this doesn't hurt your chances. There's also, however, a "no one goes there anymore, it's too crowded" effect where a lot of Academy voters are saying "I know Boseman is going to win, but I voted for Hopkins!" and that was enough for Hopkins to take the BAFTA. I'm going to follow my gut here and say it's still going to be Boseman but this is way tighter than I think anyone expects it to be.

Will win: Chadwick Boseman

Might win: Anthony Hopkins

Should win: Everyone who's ever pretended to give a shit about my Oscar predictions

Best Actress - Probably the closest and hardest to call race of the night since seemingly everyone in this category could win, but I think Frances McDormand's performance wasn't flashy enough for the voters, and Mulligan's is too genre-y to win it too. I think it's going to be Davis by a fucking hair despite the rather limited screentime of this performance.

Will win: Viola Davis (???)

Might win: Mulligan

Should win:  Sidney Flannigan for Never Rarely Sometimes Always

Best Supporting Actor - I am going to go with Daniel Kaluuya for Judas and the Black Messiah, but I'm not as confident about it as other people are. I still think of the Academy voter pool as being old, white, and generally just afraid of the Black Panthers.

Will win: Daniel Kaluuya

Might win: Paul Raci

Should win: Delroy Lindo for Da 5 Bloods

Best Supporting Actress - Yuh-Jung Youn. I feel good about this

Will win: Yuh-Jung Youn

Might win: Glenn Close, maybe?

Should win: I'm okay with Yuh-Jung Youn taking it.

Best Animated  - AKA, the award for "Most Pixar" movie, unless of course its 2001, in which you encounter the "Shrekkiest" movie exception. Still, Pixar almost never loses no matter how mediocre and underwhelming their film is.

Will win: Soul

Might win: Wolfwalkers

Should win: That scene in the Simpsons where Marge holds a potato and says "I just think they're neat"

Best Cinematography - L A N D S C A P E S

Will win: Nomadland

Might win: idk... Mank?

Should win: Yeah, Nomadland feels good

Best Costume Design - B L A C K B O T T O M (S?). It's a period piece.

Will win: Ma Rainey's Black Bottom

Might win: Mank

Should win: The Golden Globes, for disguising itself as a legitimate organization qualified to give awards

Best Directing - Yeah, I think it's going to Chloe Zhao. So glad she's working on a Marvel movie now. Now THAT is good use of talent.

Will win: Zhao for Nomadland

Might win: Uh... I dont know. Fincher?

Should win: I haven't seen a single 2020 movie I really want to go to bat for, so whatever

Documentary (Feature) - My Teacher's an Octopus! An Octopus Taught Me!? Meet this Octopus: Teachers Hate Him! Taught... by an Octopus!? My Teacher Octopus. Octopus, my teacher. Teach me, Octopus! Octoteach my puss.

Will win: Octoteachapus

Might win: who cares

Should win:  i can neither pronounce or spell "dacumintery"

Best Documentary Short - WOW lets throw a fuckin dart at the dartboard because Ive never known the winner of these and I NEVER WILL

Will win: A Love Song for Latasha

Might win: Colette

Should win: WHO KNOWS. NO ONE KNOWS

Best Editing - Ever since Bohemian Rhapsody won this oscar it broke my fucking brain so who knows anymore.

Will win: Trial of the Chicago 7: Revenge of the Sorkin

Might win: Bohemian Rhapsody, apparently

Should win: MY DUDES LETS JUST GIVE IT TO BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY AGAIN LETS MAKE HISTORY

Best Foreign Language Film - DRINK! DRINK! DRINK!

Will win: Another Round

Might win: Quo Vadis, Aida

Should win:  How should I know, I don't watch movies with subtitles

Best Make-up and Hairstyling - Is the award for most Make-Up? Because I think Viola Davis is carrying a legit 10-pounder around for Ma Rainey.

Will win: Ma Rainey's Black Bottom

Might win: The Milanese Swan

Should win: Me, for "making up" the movie The Milanese Swan. Hahaha get it

Best Music (Original Score) - Not only is Soul a movie, it's the name for a whole genre of music! You can't lose!

Will win: Soul

Might win: Funk

Should win:  Jazz

Best Music (Original Song) - I haven't heard any of these songs.

Will win: Speak Now

Might win: Husavik, apparently

Should win:  I can neither pronounce or spell the word "moozik"

Best Production Design - To quote myself: "9 times out of 10, the period piece wins." And to add on, the one about Hollywood does too.

Will win: Mank

Might win: Ma Rainey

Should win:  WHO CARES. THERES A PANDEMIC. sorry

Best Short Film (Animated) - how would i know, stop asking me! leave my family alone!!

Will win: If Anything Happens I Love You

Might win: In the end, we're all winners

Should win:  Sorry, I misread the copy. We're all wieners.

Best Short Film (Live Action) - lol

Will win: Two Distant Strangers

Might win: LITERALLY ANYTHING

Should win: well in my erudite opinion i bleh bleh bleh

Best Sound - Holy shit, they finally admitted they have no idea what the difference is between sound editing and mixing and just smushed them together. Nice.

Will win: Sound of Metal - It's got sound in the name!!

Might win: The Sound of Music

Should win: The Sound of Yo Mama. ayo gotem

Best Visual Effects - Did you know CGI stands for "Can't Get In?" It's named after what yo mama said when she tried to fit through the door to her house. lmao gotem

Will win: Tenet

Might win: i dont know

Should win: this is taking too long

Best Writing (Adapted Screenplay) - OH GOD it's actually hard this year but I think it's going to be Nomadland just because it has the forward momentum for best picture (spoiler). Could be The Father. I don't know what I'm doing. I don't feel so good Mr. Stark

Will win: No, Mad Land!

Might win: ZEE FATHAIR

Should win: Look, I think I've only seen like... 20 movies from 2020, tops. I don't care. Honestly, I'm just happy I'm still alive at this point.

Best Writing (Original Screenplay) - You know, this is starting to feel like a lot of pressure. Like why would I ever be able to predict the Oscars? What do I know? I used to have at least seen the movies, so that gave me an edge. But this year I've barely seen any of these. I'm lost, adrift in a boundless sea. I think it'll be Promising Young Woman.

Will win: Promising Young Woman

Might win: Try Oh Love The Cigar Goes Heaven

Should win:  a movie

Best Picture - Weirdly probably the only category of the whole night I feel pretty good about. I've seen Minari, Mank, Nomadland, and Trial of the Chicago 7, which are all varying degrees of good except for Mank which is varying degrees of bad. And Trail of the Chicago 7 which is an hour of good and then a half hour of really bad. Anyways I don't have super strong feelings about any of these movies but Nomadland was good, I think it has the momentum, and despite minimal Oscar controversy I don't think the voters give a shit.

Will win: Nomadland

Might win. Honestly I live in fear Green Book is going to fucking win again somehow. Some fucked up Lala Land/Moonlight scenario where Viggo Mortenson roles up in some old beater and says "woke up dis moooohnin, got some gabbagool" and then walks away with another oscar with a fat cigar in his mouth.

Should win:  Green Book. It was very touching

this is the bad place

[kqnsc5yt-blog]

Car insurance?

Car insurance?

Car insurance?

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SOURCES:

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